Reflections on Marriage

Wedding Reception, April 7, 2013

Good afternoon, and congratulations to our newly married couple. [urn
toward Groom and !ride" We are #appy to s#are t#is $oyous occasion wit# you.
[Gesture toward audience" Groom and !ride as%ed me to say a few words
a&out t#e meaning of marriage ' not $ust meaning for newly married couples, or
e(en a meaning for older married couples, &ut a meaning t#at e)tends well &eyond,
to include e(eryone else as well.
And t#at*s &ecause marriages are reflections of somet#ing muc# &igger. #e
!i&le tells us t#at marriage is a reflection of t#e lo(e t#at +esus #as for #is people.
#e apostle ,aul wrote, -.us&ands, lo(e your wi(es $ust as /#rist lo(ed t#e c#urc#
and ga(e #imself for #er01
#e apostle ,aul goes on to say, -#ere is profound trut# #idden #ere, and
it*s a&out /#rist and t#e c#urc#.1 2arriage is a reflection of t#e lo(e t#at +esus #as
for #is people.
And t#is is not some new t#ing ' it goes &ac% to t#e (ery &eginning. 3n t#e
!i&le, in t#e &oo% of Genesis, it says, -A man lea(es #is fat#er and mot#er and
unites wit# #is wife, and t#ey &ecome a new family.1
And comes s#ortly after God e)plains #is purpose for creating #uman
&eings4 -God created #uman%ind in #is own image, in t#e image of God #e created
t#em, male and female #e created t#em.1
We are created in t#e image of God, to &e a &it li%e God ' and in order to do
t#at, God created us as male and female. !ot# males and females are reflections of
w#o God is, &ut t#e combination of male and female also reflects God. God wants
eac# person, and eac# marriage, to &e reflections of w#o #e is.
5o it*s important for us to %now w#at God is li%e ' and t#e !i&le tells us t#at
God is li%e Jesus ' t#at if we #a(e seen +esus, t#en we #a(e seen t#e 6at#er. We
#a(e seen t#e %indness and compassion of God, and t#e lo(e of God t#at ma%es
sacrifices for t#e people #e lo(es.
7ac# of us s#ould &e a reflection of t#e God t#at we see in +esus ' a God
w#o lo(es us so muc# t#at #e ga(e #imself up to sa(e us. .is lo(e for us is
unconditional ' not#ing can separate us from #is lo(e. 7(en if we run away, God
still lo(es us. 7(en if we diso&ey, God still lo(es us. 7(en if we re$ect God, #e does
not re$ect us.
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#at*s t#e %ind of lo(e #e #as, and w#en we #a(e t#is %ind of lo(e, we are
reflecting t#e image of God t#at we are supposed to &e. W#en a marriage #as t#is
%ind of lo(e, it is a reflection of t#e lo(e t#at +esus #as for eac# of us.
8ow, we all %now t#at we don*t always do t#is as well as we s#ould, and in
fact, we almost never do it as well as we s#ould. We simply aren*t as muc# li%e
God as we were created to &e, and t#e natural tendency for us is to t#in% t#at, Well,
if we aren*t doing w#at God wants, t#en #e is pro&a&ly angry at us.
.e #as e(ery rig#t to punis# us, to pus# us aside as misera&le failures, &ut
God does not pus# us aside. 7(en if we cut off t#e relations#ip, God does not. .e
%eeps t#e door open. .e wants us to come #ome. We may not t#in% t#at we belong
in God*s family, &ut God says t#at t#at is precisely w#ere we &elong. #e
relations#ip is still open.
#e !i&le says t#at God is lo(e, and in t#e wedding ceremony, we #eard a
description of lo(e. According to t#e !i&le, one of t#e components of lo(e is t#at
-lo(e does not %eep a record of wrongs.1 3t does not see% (engeance.
8ow, t#at is certainly good ad(ice for [Groom and !ride", for all of us w#o
are married, and for anyone w#o wants to %eep a friends#ip. 3f some&ody does
somet#ing wrong, don*t count it against t#em.
!ut God is not as%ing us to do somet#ing t#at #e is not willing to do #imself.
God also does not keep a record of wrongs ' and t#is is so contrary to our
stereotype of God t#at many people find it really #ard to &elie(e. #ey t#in% t#at
God is %eeping trac% of e(ery single t#ing we do wrong, and #e*s going to ma%e
some&ody pay for it.
Well, t#at some&ody is +esus. .e is God, and #e lo(es eac# of us so muc#
t#at #e (olunteered to pay for it #imself, to accept t#e conse9uences of all t#e
t#ings t#at we #a(e e(er done wrong. #e &i&lical &oo% of /olossians puts it t#is
way4 -7(en t#oug# you were dead in your sins, #e #as forgiven all your sins.1 We
#ad a de&t we could not pay, &ut t#e !i&le says t#at +esus #as nailed t#is de&t to t#e
cross. .e #as destroyed t#e de&t: it is not a de&t any more.
3n ,aul*s second letter to t#e /orint#ians, #e puts it li%e t#is4 -3n /#rist God
was reconciling t#e world to #imself, not counting people*s sins against t#em.1 3n
ot#er words, God is not %eeping a record of all t#e wrong t#ings we #a(e done. #e
door is open, and #e wants us to come &ac% #ome. #at*s w#at God is li%e, and
t#at*s w#at #e wants us to &e li%e, and t#at*s w#at #e wants marriages to &e li%e.
8ow, we don*t do t#is as well as we oug#t ' &ut e(en these failures #a(e
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already &een paid for in ad(ance. As ,aul says, not#ing can separate us from t#e
lo(e of /#rist.
We don*t deser(e t#is %ind of lo(e, t#at t#e 5on of God would sacrifice
#imself for us ' and yet #e would #a(e done it for any of us. #at s#ows us w#at
lo(e is really li%e. #is is #ow we %now w#at lo(e is, t#e !i&le says, t#at +esus
died for us. .e made us for a purpose, and #e is not going to a&andon t#at purpose
merely &ecause we didn*t get rig#t t#e first time,0 or t#e second time, or t#e t#ird
time. God does not %eep trac% of #ow many times we got it wrong. .e $ust %eeps
t#e door open, waiting for us to come &ac% #ome.
8o, we don*t deser(e it. We mig#t feel t#oroug#ly ashamed to meet our
2a%er. !ut we are forgi(en, &y grace, for w#ate(er #a(e done. #ere is no sin too
great, no #eart too cold. God #as reconciled you to #imself, not counting your sins
against you.
And w#en we come &ac% #ome to God, w#at will we find; We will find a
party, a cele&ration, a &an9uet. 3t*s e(en li%e a wedding<
#e apostle +o#n descri&ed it in t#e &oo% of Re(elation4
3 saw a new #ea(en and a new eart#0
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And 3 saw t#e #oly city=
t#e new +erusalem=descending out of #ea(en from God, made ready
like a bride adorned for her husband.
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And 3 #eard a loud (oice from
t#e t#rone saying4 ->oo%< #e residence of God is among #uman
&eings. .e will li(e among t#em, and t#ey will &e #is people, and God
#imself will &e wit# t#em.
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.e will wipe away e(ery tear from t#eir
eyes, and deat# will not e)ist any more=or mourning, or crying, or
pain, for t#e former t#ings #a(e ceased to e)ist.1
#e future t#at God #as planned for us is a future of eternal relationships, of
lo(e for one anot#er, of li(ing toget#er in peace and #armony and $oy, fore(er and
e(er. God will en$oy &eing wit# us, and we will en$oy &eing wit# #im, and wit#
eac# ot#er. 3t will &e a cele&ration li%e we #a(e ne(er seen< [Groom and !ride"
will &e t#ere, cele&rating, and we are all in(ited to cele&rate, too.
#e marriage we #a(e today is a reflection of w#at God wants our life to &e
fore(er. 5o, [Groom and !ride", may your marriage &e a reflection of God*s lo(e
for us, and may it &e an e)ample to ot#ers of #ow muc# +esus lo(es us, of #ow
willing #e is to forgi(e t#e t#ings we*(e done wrong.
3n your marriage, mista%es will &e made, &ut lo(e %eeps no record of
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wrongs. 2ay t#e door always &e open for eit#er one of you to &e accepted and
em&raced &y t#e ot#er.
And for t#e rest of us, may we see t#e lo(e &etween [Groom and !ride" as a
reflection and a reminder to us today of #ow eagerly God wants to em&race us, to
welcome us #ome, to $oin t#e cele&ration in #ea(en, w#ere we can li(e wit# God
wit#out any mourning or crying or pain or deat#, &ecause t#e old approac# to life
will &e a t#ing of t#e past. We don*t deser(e it, &ut God gi(es it to us, &ecause #e
really wants us to $oin t#e cele&ration.
>et*s pray4
-God, our lo(ing #ea(enly 6at#er, t#an% you for +esus and t#an% you for
wiping away all our sins. #an% you t#at we #a(e a #ome in #ea(en, paid for &y
+esus /#rist. We as% your &lessing now on [Groom and !ride", t#at t#eir marriage
mig#t &e a &rig#t and s#ining reflection of #ow muc# you lo(e us, t#at t#e joy t#ey
#a(e is a reflection of t#e $oy t#at we will #a(e wit# you in eternity.
-And for any #ere today w#o are not 9uite sure of your lo(e for t#em, #elp
t#em come to #a(e fait# #ere and now t#at t#e door is open for t#em to come #ome
to you. .elp t#em say, ?@es, God, 3 want to come &ac%, to #a(e a relations#ip wit#
you. 3 may &e a &it scared, &ut you will em&race me li%e a groom em&races #is
&ride, and 3 need t#at %ind of lo(e in my life.*
-God, t#an% you for t#e gift of lo(e. #is is w#at we were made for, and t#is
is w#ere we find t#e greatest $oy in life. We cele&rate a marriage today, &ut we
%now we can cele&rate only &ecause t#ere is somet#ing muc# more profound for
us, &ecause our marriages are reflections of w#at you want us all to &e. 2ay we all
&e reflections of your lo(e for us. Amen.1
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