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That evening Carl took Sebastian and the Laurensons to a restaurant outside
Oxford. Amy had arranged for a babysitter to mind their two young daughters so this
represented no problem. The conversation over dinner was lively and varied, and Carl
was quite happy to talk about Hollywood and his film career, and about the
forthcoming project Zyron and Axma he was thinking of doing concerning
terrorists and aliens.
In fact Carl always liked to sound out non-movie industry people on ideas. Often
in the past he had found the odd comment or reservation of invaluable help when it
came to fine tuning the dramatic thrust of a particular piece. Moreover, it was of
course far cheaper to try to spot any weaknesses a story might have before a frame
was shot rather than wait until the die was caste. Yet, as the filmmaker outlined it to
them, Zyron and Axma was a thought-provoking, thrilling humdinger of a movie
which met with a firm thumbs up from both the American professor and his wife. A
reaction that pleased the multi-Oscar winner no end.
So your full title is Haitinger Professor of the Philosophy of Mind? said Carl,
repeating what Bartholomew had just told him as the discussion had drifted on to
other themes.
Yes, thats it, smiled Bart.
The Haitingers of Houston, I take it? the filmmaker inquired.
Yes, nodded the professor. Do you know them?
Yes, slightly, Carl replied. As you know their original business was oil, but over
the last couple of years theyve had a controlling interest in Triple S. So obviously
that touches on my territory.
Yes, it would do, said Bart. Obviously Ive met Alvin Haitinger, and his son
Lyle, but I dont know them well either. Also isnt Triple S tied in quite closely with
Cyphonics? The reason I know that is that I remember a few months back I got a call
from Lyle asking me if I could spend some time on the phone with Grant Firth and he
said their businesses were linked.
Yes, thats absolutely right, confirmed Carl smiling. Gee, so youve had
dealings with Grant Firth? Ha, hes a friend of mine! In fact hes only been in London
this week and I introduced him to Sebastian. What did he want?
Oh, he just wanted to get my views on a few things, said the prematurely balding
professor. He is, as you may know, very big on the prospect of developing AI
Artificial Intelligence a field in which so far progress has been rather modest.
However, he reckons, added the philosopher of mind with an engaging grin, that
once machines surpass humans in intelligence then machines will take over. Moreover
hes quite sure that it will happen. In fact he doesnt even necessarily see it as a bad
thing. Just another step in evolution, if I recall correctly, was his description of it.
And do you think hes right? the filmmaker asked.
You mean do I regard it as conceivable? queried the professor.
Yes, said Carl.
Oh, in some shape or form Id imagine so, Bart replied. Youd agree with that
wouldnt you, Amy?
Yes, probably, she answered. I dont know for sure.
And Sebastian? asked the professor. What do you think?
Yes, Id go along with Amy, he replied. In theory one has to concede that if
humans are just machines then theres always the possibility of building a better
machine. Though I suppose at first blush the consequences of such a thing are rather
disturbing. Certainly in such circumstances human beings would become second class
citizens.
Well, Grant Firth doesnt think wed be any kind of citizens at all! interposed the
professor. According to him the machines will just decide to get rid of us. His thesis

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is that the only way to survive will be to become a machine oneself! His solution is
that well all going to have to end up as microchips the size of one centimetre cubes!
Yes? remarked Carl wide-eyed.
Yes, asserted the professor.
Sounds like typical Grant! quipped the filmmaker. So what exactly did he call
you about?
He wanted my views on consciousness, answered the American academic. He
wanted to know whether our awareness of ourselves and our awareness of our feelings
was anything that was in any way unexplainable.
All part of his program to become a machine? smirked Carl.
I imagine so, Bart concurred.
So what did you tell him? the filmmaker light-heartedly pressed.
I told him what I believe to be the case, said the professor, which is that our
sense of consciousness is just a perfect illusion. And like all perfect illusions it fools
us completely.
Really? wondered the filmmaker.
Yes, said the professor. You see people always have a sense of what one might
call I. You know on the more basic level the sense that it is I who is happy, or
sad, or sees beauty, or feels pain. Or, on a more subtle level, the sense that I feel that
I ought to do this or I ought to do that, or I know it is I who is right now eating
lobster ravioli in the restaurant of Le Manoir aux Quat Saisons while talking to Carl
Kress, or the sense that I can imagine myself sitting on a desert island or travelling
to another planet. The conundrum is what is this I and where is it?
And youre saying its an illusion? Carl interjected.
Yes, Bart nodded. One has to understand that ones brain isnt like one computer
but like several of them working semi-together, thus in reality consciousness is some
parts of the brain watching other parts of the brain and then relaying to yet other parts
of the brain what it sees. But were not really seeing anything except the mirage or the
mirror-like reflections of our own mental feedback. In other words theres nothing
tangible about consciousness, nor is there any exact location where you can go
looking for it, its not a physical thing in any way at all. But because its not physical
doesnt make it magical or mysterious or miraculous yet youd be surprised how
many people somehow want to see it that way.
Yes, I agree, added Sebastian. Treating consciousness as something special is
really just a form of intellectual self-deception. Its an attempt to elevate ourselves
beyond our station by arguing that we possess this fantastically sophisticated attribute
called consciousness when in fact it would be a lot more honest to accept that it
isnt that sophisticated at all.
Yes, reflected Carl. But its still true that we have very strong sense of I.
I know, said Bart, but no matter how strong it is, its still something floating in
mid-air. The idea that its physically somewhere in ones brain is nonsense; as is all
the stuff about neural Darwinism and non-computable numbers, which I wouldnt
even dream of boring you with. To me the best analogy compares consciousness with
stereo music. When you sit between two stereo speakers the music as a rule will
appear to be coming from somewhere right in the middle directly in between them,
but how can the sound be coming from where there is no speaker? You now see what I
mean by a perfect illusion?
Carl smiled and nodded. Yes, its an illusion you cant see behind.
Exactly, said the professor. But I tell you the amount of academic thought and
ink expended on the subject of consciousness is mind-boggling!
And that was the only subject that Grant wanted to know about? asked the
filmmaker.

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In essence, yes, Bart answered. But Carl, you have to appreciate, he went on,
that in the context of Artificial Intelligence its an absolutely fundamental question.
You see if there really were something transcendental about consciousness, which
there isnt, then the skeptics would argue that you could never incorporate it into a
machine. And, as consciousness is in many peoples eyes inseparably linked to
intelligence, if you couldnt machinify consciousness then you couldnt successfully
machinify intelligence either. Now again of course some people will argue that
consciousness and intelligence are not necessarily inseparable, but I wouldnt be so
convinced. To me any definition of real intelligence has to be teleological, that is to
say that you cant have intelligence without having a goal, and to have a goal you
need to have a will, and once you start talking about a will youre getting perilously
close to the type of thought processes we bracket under the phenomenon of what we
call consciousness. You see what I mean? Intelligence needs a task to display itself. To
choose a task you need a will. Will is dependent on consciousness.
Yes, I see what you mean, conceded the filmmaker. So Grant must have been
pretty pleased to learn from you that in his quest for AI consciousness was one less
obstacle to have to deal with?
Yes, said Bart. He explained to me that as he saw it the most critical milestone
on the way to creating a machine with superior all round brainpower to a human was
first building a machine with equal all round brainpower. Note the use of the
expression all round, one is not talking here about superiority in just a very narrow
area. That already exists, think of a pocket calculator for example. No, one is aiming
for a machine with the full range of human faculties.
In effect indistinguishable from a human? suggested Carl.
Yes, said the professor, assuming naturally of course that you chose to give it a
face and arms and legs and so on. But mentally anyway it would have all the same
feelings as we do: love, hate, jealousy, ambition, pride, fear, you name it. In that sense
it would be identical. And of course that raises the philosophical point of if you cant
tell the difference, then is there a difference? And again theres been an awful lot of
hogwash written about how in some way a machine could never understand in the
way we understand. But I think people who take that position are merely labouring
under a misunderstanding of what understanding involves to me understanding is
simply a process of using ones memory to correlate or associate one thing or event
with many other things or events. If someone asks you what a glove is, youd
understand what the question meant because you know a glove is an item of clothing
you wear on a hand to protect it. In other words, understanding is something that
emerges from extensive cross-referencing of concepts you already know, and
therefore the more you know the more you can understand. But once again, just like
with consciousness, I dont see anything transcendental or mysterious about it in any
way.
Yes, I agree, added Sebastian. It seems to me that when it comes to things such
as consciousness and understanding a lot of highly intelligent people get confused.
Though of course theyd deny that thats so.
So, inquired the multi-Oscar winner, you both believe that everything could be
at least as understandable to a machine as it is to a person?
Yes, ultimately, answered Sebastian.
Indeed, said the professor. Im of exactly the same persuasion. Some things
arent understandable period because theyre antinomies that is logical paradoxes.
For instance, think of my saying whatever Im saying now is a lie. Well, I cant be
telling the truth because Ive said Im telling a lie, but because Im telling a lie I must
be lying that Im telling a lie, which suggests Im telling the truth, which I cant be
because Ive said Im telling a lie! So there is no answer, it isnt understandable. Or,
he smiled, if you want to lie awake at night heres another one: I know a village

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barber who shaves all those, and only those, who do not shave themselves, now the
question is who shaves the barber? He paused a moment to let Carl think. Actually
my advice to you, he then added with a humorous twinkle in his eyes, is not to waste
your time on it, because once again it cant be worked out! But, getting back to AI,
and leaving logical paradoxes aside, Im quite sure that in due course machines will
understand far better than we do.
And, if so, thatll be tricky, smiled Carl. Theyll be right on all sorts of things
and we wont understand why!
Yes true, very true, said Sebastian pensively. Grant may not be far out the
machines will take over.
Though only, reflected Amy, a long, long way into the future.
I dont know. That all rather depends on the rate of progress, Carl grinned.
Maybe if Dr Dweck gets his way Sebastian might even live to see it!
Ha! she laughed. And if he does hell be able to ask his new masters what they
think of semi-non-random!
Maybe! smiled Sebastian.
Well, certainly for the short time until the machines realise they dont need us
anymore it will be like going to an oracle, said Bart. Initially Im sure well be ever
so pleased with these intelligences weve created, and well get answers from them to
things we never dreamed possible. Its only later that well get our comeuppance.
After a deceptively Utopian honeymoon period the machines would quickly come to
the conclusion that there was no point in expending their energy on us.
Yes, I guess so, Carl agreed. But semi-non-random? Whats semi-non-random?
he asked curiously. Not having been with them the last time Sebastian visited Oxford,
this was an expression that hardly surprisingly he had never come across before.
Sebastian, abetted by some spirited and good-humoured quips and comments from
the Laurensons, was happy to explain.
In fact it was late that night by the time Carl dropped the young Englishman in
Notting Hill on his way back to The Dorchester, but a splendid day had been had by
all.