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Galaxie Inide Hi Head

Terrance Hae ue poetr to how that there i more to him, and to anone,

http://nyti.ms/1BfnVvl

than what ou expect.

STPHN URT

MARCH 24, 2015

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Fiftystudentssatatbrightwhitedesksinconcentricrowsinthesterilenew
computercenteratWoodlandHillsHighSchool,theireyesonthepoet
TerranceHayes.At6foot5,Hayes,whois43,iseasytoseefromanywhere,
andheseemedeminentlyapproachable,neitherteachernorteen:bluejeans,a
blacksweater,aleathercellphonecaseclippedtohisbelt.Hehadcometothe
school,inaraciallymixeddistrictthatservesseveraldisadvantaged
communitiesinPittsburgh,toreadpoetry.ThestudentsGoths,hiphopfans
ingiantsweatshirtsandjocksinsportsjerseysgrewquiet,readytolisten.
ButHayesdidntstartoutwithhispoems.Instead,hetalkedabouthowhe
cametowritethem:HowhegotfromhisnativeColumbia,S.C.,tograduate
studyattheUniversityofPittsburghhowhispoemsreacttofilm(LadySings
theBlues),tonews(aChicagogangmurderfrom1994),tomusic(Kendrick
Lamar),tofamilyhistoryandhowheassembledsomeofthosepoemsinto
books,fromhisfirst,MuscularMusic(publishedin1999),tohismostrecent,
HowtoBeDrawn(whichwillbepublishedthismonth).
HayeshasreadatCarnegieHallandtheLibraryofCongressandedited
theannualBestAmericanPoetry,whosepreviousvolumesincludedhiswork
seventimes.HewonaNationalBookAwardin2010forthecollection
Lightheadand,lastyear,aMacArthurFoundationgeniusgrant.In2014,
PeoplemagazinenamedHayesamongitscandidatesforSexiestManAlive.(I
didntthinkanyonewouldseeit,hetoldme,withcharacteristic
understatedness.)ThepoetSharaMcCallum,afriendofHayess,said,
Famouspoetseemslikeanoxymoron,butTerranceseemstodeliver
somethingforalotofpeople.Whenshesawhimatacrowdedwriters
conventiontwoyearsago,shesaid,itwaslikegroupieswithMickJagger.
Withclosecroppedhairinplaceofhisformermohawk,Hayeshasthe
physicaleaseofthebasketballplayerheoncewas,theathletesbodily
awarenessthatJohnMcPheecalledasenseofwhereyouare.Whenreading
verse,Hayesstoodstill,withsquaredshoulders,butwhenhetalkedaboutthe
poems,heleanedforward,hisarmsfoldedoverthelectern,pointingat
studentsandtoaslideshowhehadprepared,projectedonascreenbehind
him.BeforereadinghispoemLadySingstheBlues,heplayedanaudioclip

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ofBillieHolidaysingingGoodMorning,Heartache.(Goodmorning,
heartache,herewegoagain/Goodmorning,heartache,youretheonewho
knewmewhen.)Thestudentswatched,theirfacesblank.Thesongwas
plainlyunfamiliar.Doesitreallymatterthatyouknowthisstuff?heasked.
Noneofthemventuredananswer.Afewgazeddown,perhapschecking
cellphones.Butmanywerestillpayingattentionwhenhebegantalkingabout
thingstheydidknow:Pittsburghandhiphop.Ihungoutwithalotofhiphop
guysingradschool,hesaid.Theywouldsay,Whyyougotyourbookjust
comeonstage!Inresponse,hewrotehisownhiphopperformancepoem,
BalladofBullethead,whichbegins,Iwasborninmetal/mymothers
kettle/Myfatherpeddled/Sowesettledalone.Whenhereaditaloud,the
studentsbrokeintoapplause.Youfindarteverywhere,hesaid,before
readingwhathecalledmyonlybasketballpoem,Talk,from2006,inwhich
ablackstudentreactstoaracistcommentmadebyawhiteteammate.The
poembeginsinamiddleschoollockerroom:Talk/likeaniggernow,my
whitefriend,M,said.Thestudentsgaspedattheopeningline.
Apoemisneveraboutonething,hetoldthem.Youwantittobeas
complicatedasyourfeelings.Heplayedaclipofthebroodingjazzraphit
HisPain,byBJtheChicagoKid,featuringKendrickLamar,withits
melancholyrefrainIdontknowwhyYoukeepblessingme.Thestudents
knewthesong.Hayesthenreadanewpoem,TheCarpenterAnt,abouta
troubledrelativeitsstanzasparaphraseHisPain.Shetookherhammer
withitsclawlikeamandible/toherownhandmadehousinghumming,/Idont
knowwhyGodkeepsblessingme.
Imnotreallyapoetryperson,an11thgrader,HannahRauenzahn,told
meafterward.ButIreallywanttoreadthatkindofstuffnow.WhenHayes
askedforquestions,thestudentshandsshotup.Tobeapoet,doyouhaveto
writeintraditionalpoeticforms?Doyouhavetowriteiniambicpentameter?
Ifyoucanbreakdance,thatscool,Hayesanswered.Ifyoucanbreakdance
inastraitjacket,thatsevenbetter.
Hayestoldmethathadhenotreceivedabasketballscholarshipfor
college,hemighthavefollowedhismother,Ethel,andbecomeaprisonguard.

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Iwouldhavehopedtohavedonesomethingelse,hesaid.Corrections
seemedliketheeasiestoption.Thatorthemilitary.HismotherhadHayesat
16hisbiologicalfatherwasnotinthepicture.WhenHayeswasatoddler,
EthelmetandmarriedJamesHayes,acareerArmyman.WhenHayesrefers
tohisfather,hemeansJameshispoemTheSameCitycomparesJames
HayestotheNewTestamentJoseph,raisingasonthatwasnthis.
In1980theHayesfamilysettledinFolkstone,anAfricanAmerican
neighborhood12milesfromdowntownColumbia,S.C.JamesII,Hayess
youngerbrother,calledFolkstoneaUtopiaofyouth,withplacestoplay
outdoors,nogangsandnonightlife.Myparentswouldhavehadme
believe/therewasnosuchthingasrace/thereinthewildbackyard,Hayes
writesinthepoemRoot.Athismostlywhite,preppyhighschool,Hayess
friendsknewhimasaseriousstudent,abasketballplayerandapainterfew
knewthathealsowrotepoems.
HayesattendedCokerCollegeinHartsville,S.C.,andplayedpower
forwardforDanSchmotzer,whoisstillthemensbasketballcoachthere.
SchmotzertoldmethatHayeswashighlyrecruitedinSouthCarolinabecause
hewassuchagoodstudent,butheunderperformedonthecourtformostof
histimebecauseherefusedtowearcorrectivegoggles.(Thick,uglygoggles,
Schmotzeradds,KareemAbdulJabbargoggles.)
Senioryear,Hayeschangedhismind,worethegogglesandtoreupthe
conference.Thatyear,healsoswitchedhismajorfromstudioarttoEnglish.
TheEnglishfacultyhadbeenquietlyadmiringHayessworkforyears,sharing
hispoemswithoneanother.Oneprofessor,JohnFrench,encouragedHayesto
applytograduateschoolsinwriting.Thatyear,1994,thepoetToiDerricotte,
whotaughtattheUniversityofPittsburgh,gaveareadingatacollegehalfan
houraway.Hayesdrovethere,metheranddecidedthattheM.F.A.programat
Pittwashisfirstchoice.
FromthesmallworldofCoker,wherehewasastar,Hayesbecamea
youngSouthernmaninabig,cold,Northerncity,aswellastheonlyblack
maninthegraduateprogram,Derricotterecalls.Heprobablyfeltpretty
alone.Askedtodescribehisownfeelingsbackthen,Hayeswho,inour

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conversations,rarelyadmitteddirectlytoanegativeemotionsimply
deferredtoDerricotte.Toiwouldknow,hesaid.Whenshesaysthings,I
trustthat,becauseshewouldhaveseenmebetterthanIcouldhaveseen
myself.
Derricotte,alongwiththepoetCorneliusEady,wasthenorganizingCave
Canem,aseriesofretreatsandnetworkbuildingactivitiesforblackpoets.
AlongwiththeDarkRoomCollectiveinBoston,CaveCanemwouldbecomea
majorincubatorforthecurrentrenaissanceinblackpoetry,whichincludesthe
poetsTracyK.Smith,whowonthe2012PulitzerPrizeinpoetryAfaaMichael
Weaver,whowontheKingsleyTuftsprizelastyearand,mostrecently,
ClaudiaRankine,whowontheNationalBookCriticsCircleAwardforpoetry
thisyear.
HayesworkedatCaveCanemandattendedtheretreatsandpoetry
workshopsfrom1996until2002.ThepoetElizabethAlexander,whoteaches
atYale,remembersthatHayeswasanassistant,Xeroxingpeoplespoems,
withalowkeydemeanorthatbeliedtheintricategalaxiesinsidehishead.
Onthelastnightofthefirstweeklongretreat,inJune1996,atamonasteryon
theHudsonRiver,thepoetsformedacircle.Hayesbegantocry.Hesaidthe
reasonhewascryingwasthatitwasthefirsttimehecouldeverwalkaround
withouthisdefenseson,Derricottesays.Whenhesaidthat,everybody
startedbreakingdown.
Itwasanunusualmomentforhim.IwouldntsaythatImtheperson
whoeverbreaksdownlikethatthatsnothowIroll,Hayessaid.Thatswhy
Toiremembersit.Butthepeopleinthatcirclemadehimrealizethathe
belonged.Ihadnthadthiskindoffamilybefore,hesaid.
ThatfirstCaveCanemretreatalsointroducedHayestoYonaHarvey,a
poetandtheHowardUniversityclassmateofachildhoodfriend.Theybegan
exchanginglettersandphonecalls.Harveyhadalreadydecidedtoteach
EnglishinJapanthefollowingsummer.IdidntthinkIwasgoingwithher,
Hayestoldme.Butwhenhesawheragainatanotherwritersconference,in
April,hehadstartedtoenvision,andreject,theideaofalifewithouther.They
hadbeentogetheramonthwhenheproposed.

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ImetHarveyforteaneartheUniversityofPittsburghcampuswherethey
bothteach.Petiteandconfident,withawhitestreakatthefrontofherclose
cutblackcurls,shecanbeequallyeffusiveaboutthecouplesomnivoroustaste
inmusic(FlyingLotus,Burial,SufjanStevens,NinaSimone),aboutHayess
writingandaboutherown(herfirstbook,HemmingtheWater,was
publishedin2013).
Harveydescribestheyearaftertheirweddingasmarriagebootcamp.
Hayesfeltisolatedbyhisheightaswellashisskincolor.Hehadtroubleinhis
body,movingaroundJapan,Harveysaid.Buttheylikedtravelingaroundthe
islands,takinginJapanesesoul,popandjazz.TheirdaughterUa(pronounced
OoAh)wasbornin1999theynamedheraftertheJapaneseR&Bpopsinger
KaoriHasegawa,whotooktheSwahiliwordforflowerasherstagename.They
movedtoPittsburghin2001,whenHayesreceivedajobofferfromCarnegie
Mellon.
Hayesinvitedmetodinnerattheirthreestory,yellowbrickhouseashort
drivefromthePittcampus,wheretheyvelivedsincetheirson,Aaron,was
bornin2003.Adozengentlestairsandaporchwiththreesquarecolumnsset
thehouseofffromtheresidentialstreet.Wesatatatableinawarm,modern
kitchenwhiletheirsquatpug,Fetch,imploredthepoet(successfully)for
treats.UacamehomefromherbasketballgamesoonafterIarrivedshetold
Hayesthatherteamwontheirawaygame,despiteahostilecrowd.Youall51
now?heasked.Youreinagoodmood.Shenodded.
OvertakeoutshortribburgersfromtheBelgianrestaurantParkBruges,
HayesandItalkedabouthiswork.Myearlybookswereobsessedwithwho
myfatherwas,hesaid.Itwasaquestionhebegantoaddressingraduate
school,althoughhedidntmeethisbiologicalfather,EarthellTyler,whois
knownasButch,untilhewas33.(Theyhaveseeneachotheronlyacoupleof
times.)AllofHayessbookshavepoemsaboutfathersandfatherhood,along
withpoemsaboutaggressive,violentorabsurdlymachorolemodels.My
daddieshavevoices/likebachelors,likecastigators&crooners,hewritesin
HipLogic.Eachofmydaddiesasks,Areyouwriting/anotherpoemabout
me?

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Inrecentyears,Hayessaid,hewantedtomoveon.Iwasthinking,Icant
write12booksaboutwhosmydaddy,hetoldme.Hehastriedtoredirecthis
focustowomen,butoftenfindshimselfdriftingback.Anewpoem,Howto
DrawaPerfectCircle,beginswithafemalefigure,butquicklyshiftstomen:a
strangerneararailroadunderpass,atransitcop,Odysseus.Hecomesfroma
verymaledominated,heterofamily,Harveysaid.Iteasehimsometimes.I
say,Youdontknowanythingaboutwomen,andhellsay,Itstrue.
Hayessfirstcollection,MuscularMusic,wonmultipleprizes,
amongthemtheKateTuftsaward.HipLogicwontheNationalPoetrySeries
contestin2001.ItalsobroughtHayesararecommitmentfromatrade
publisher,Penguin,whichbroughtoutthewellreceivedWindinaBoxin
2006.
Thatyear,thepoetJasonKoo,writinginTheMissouriReview,noted,
somewhatuncomfortably,Hayessascendance.Hehadcometorepresent
morethanhispoems.Hewasanattractivesymbolofintegration,an
ambassador,anunimpeachablestoryofblackmaleachievement.Thereisa
buzzabouthisname,Koowrote.Manypeoplewhohavenotevenreadhis
booksor,indeed,anycontemporarypoetryatall,haveheardofhimorclaim
tohaveheardofhim,soasnottoappearuncool.PoetsIknowwhocannot
agreeonanythingagreeonlikingHayes.Admirerswantedtoembracewhat
theybelievedhestoodfor.AdrianMatejka,apoetwhoalsoattendedCave
Canem,saysthatpeopleprojectaspirationsontoHayes.Heskindofapoetic
Rorschach,hewrotemeinanemail.
ButHayesspoemsinsist,sometimesbitterly,thatthereismoretoHayes,
andmoretoanyone,thanwhatyoucanseeorwhatyouexpecttosee.People
wantsomesortofaffirmingnarrative,Hayessaid,asifIwasfromtheghetto
andwenttojailandthenpoetrysavedmylife.Hisnewbookbeginswitha
poemtitledWhatItLookLike.Init,competingstereotypesaboutAfrican
Americanscollide:
MyuncleusedthemoneyIgavehim
tobuyafewvialsofwhatlookedlikecandy
afterthepartywheremygrandmasang

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inanoutfitthatwasobviouslymade
foraWestAfricanking.Mymottois
Nevermistakewhatitisforwhatitlookslike.
AsonnetfromHipLogicmocksthepersistenceofracialstereotypesby
repeatingthesameline14times:Weslicedthewatermelonintosmiles.
Whencollegestudents(thoseIteachatHarvard,forexample)readHayes,
theytalkabouttheunderlyingseriousnessofpoemsaboutlynchings,fistfights
orrape.ButwhenpoetstalkaboutHayes,theytendtoaddresshisinvented
forms:poemsbasedonanagrams,ontheJapaneseslideshowscalled
pechakuchaandonpuzzles.
Hayeshaswrittenpoemsthatspeakto,orfor,the1980sTVstarMr.T
theblacknationalistpoetAmiriBarakathesegregationistsenator(andsecret
fatherofablackdaughter)StromThurmondtheRussianmodernistpoetand
provocateurVladimirMayakovskyandthepoetEtheridgeKnight,whobegan
writinginprison.Hismostrevealingimpersonations,though,invoke
chameleonicpopstarslikeMichaelJacksonandDavidBowie.
Hisworkexploresmultipleidentitiesandmultipleformsofmasculinity
howtobe,orbecome,variouskindsofmenbutitisalsoanartofevasion:
Tobecomeafulltimepoet,Hayeshadtoleaveahouseofprisonguards.Hayes
workstoescapenottheAfricanAmericanidentitybutthedemandthathe(or
anyone)expressthatidentityinthesamewayallthetime.WhenHayesreadin
SouthCarolinalastmonth,ayoungwhitegirlprettymuchaccostedmeand
said,Whydoyouwritesomuchaboutbeingblack?hetoldme.Itwasntthe
firsttimehewasasked.BecauseIamblack.Imblack,ImSouthern,Im
male,Imobsessive,Imweird,Imhalfblind,heanswered.
Hayesstillpaintsseriouslyallfiveofhisbooks,includingHowtoBe
Drawn,featurehispaintingsonthecover.AfterhisvisittoWoodlandHills
HighSchool,Hayeshadtheafternoonfree.Iwantedtolookatartwithhim,
andhesuggestedtheAndyWarholMuseum,anelegantboxalongthe
AlleghenyRiver.Attheschool,hehadprojectedlikeastageactorand
animatedtheroom.Butaswedrovetothemuseum,thechancetospeak
casuallyabouthislifeseemedtocomeasarelieffromthepressureofpublic

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performance.AslongasImwritingandworking,Icankeepittogether,he
toldme.
Harveyhadtoldmethatforallherhusbandseaseinthespotlight,she
thoughtofhimasessentiallyshyhischaracteristicvisibilityhasbecome,for
him,aconstantlabor.Ifhecouldfigureouthowtodisappear,Ithinkhe
would,shesays.Anothernewpoem,TheRoseHasTeeth,declares,I
wantedtobeinvisible,andcontinues:Iwastryingtoplay/likeawoman
blackerthananunpaidlightbill,/likeawhiteboylostinthesnow.
TheWarholMuseumitselfmakesastrangekindofargument:Itsbuilt
aroundtheworkofamanwhomadehisartoutofpublicity.Aswewalked,
HayesnotedthecleanlinesofWarholsearlysketchesandcanvases,butthe
closerwegottotheworkthatmadetheartistfamous,thelessattentionwe
paidtoit.Instead,wetalkedabouttheshapeofapoetscareer.With
popularity,itgetshardertoknowifpeopletakeyouseriously,hesaid.Ima
personwhoneverreallywantstohavehisdoorclosed.Iwanttohaveitopen
andseewhosgoingtocomein.Butlately,moreandmorepeopleatthe
door,hesaid,careaboutmebutnotaboutpoetry.
Peopleoftenaskhimwhatitmeanstobeaspokesmanforpoetry.The
questionseemstomakehimuncomfortable.Hetoldmethatheusually
answersbytalkingaboutaninterviewheconductedtwoyearsagowiththe
rapperandproducerRZAoftheWuTangClan.Notthathewasrepresenting
hiphoporblackpeopleorthathewasfromNewYork,itwasthathewasRZA,
thathewassoathomeinhimself,hesaid.Imjustinterestedinbeing
present,notinbeingrepresentativeofanything.
Andyetheacceptsthisroleofambassador,constructingthatelaborate
slideshowpresentationthathehastakennotonlytohighschoolclassesbut
alsotoaseniorcenterandajuveniledetentionfacility.ThatdayatWoodland
Hills,thestudentsswarmedHayesafterhistalk.TheA.P.Englishteacher,Lisa
Silverman,praisedhisworkinmultipletraditions,inconventionalpoetryand
spokenword,Shakespeareandhiphop.Butshecouldnthelpsayingthat
Hayesstoodforsomethingmore.HestheLangstonHughesoftheir
generation,shetoldme,beforeturningtoHayestotellhimthathesetagood

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example.Youaredefinitelycomfortableinyourmanhood,shesaid.
AsHayestookquestionsfromstudents,hetriedpatientlytodrawfine
distinctions,leadingthestudentsbackfrombroadnotionsoffilm,songand
poetrytoparticularpoemsandlines.Hedescribedhisdiscomfortwhena
whiteguyhemetintheHamptonsassumed,hearinghewasapoet,thathe
mustdospokenword.Andhetookhistime,evenwithquerieslikeKobeor
LeBron?(LeBron.)OnestudentwantedtoknowwhetherHayesspoetrystill
drewonhiphop.Onart?Onpoverty?Onspokenword?OnShakespeare?
Usingyourstyle,askedaquietblondgirl,canyouwriteapoemabout
anything?Hesmiled.Tothatquestion,Hayeshadaquickanswer.
Yes.
StephenBurtisaliterarycriticandprofessorofEnglishatHarvard.
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A version of this article appears in print on March 29, 2015, on page MM32 of the Sunday Magazine
with the headline: Galaxies Inside His Head.

2015 The New York Times Company

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