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How to perform Salat-l-Istikhara

12 Tips from the Sunnah to


Communicate Effectively with
Others
Mar 29, 2015 hotd2admin

(http://hadithoftheday.com/author/hotd2admin/) Personal Development


(http://hadithoftheday.com/category/personal-development/), Purification
(http://hadithoftheday.com/category/purification/) 0 Comments
(http://hadithoftheday.com/12-tips-from-the-sunnah-to-communicate-effectivelywith-others/#disqus_thread)

By Noorul Irfana Mashooq Rahman


We communicate with people on a daily basis, and whats better
than learning some important types of etiquette that could
improve our daily interactions! I personally worked as an
elementary school teacher in Sharjah for a period of time. After
Allah

ASK A QUESTON

blessed me with my third child, I couldnt get back to

work and I didnt miss the work environment much except for a

Nouman Ali Khan talks to HOTD

few wonderful things that used to happen. I reminisced all those


small, lovely things and especially remembered the peace
greetings.

Hadith of the Day 12 Tips from the Sunnah to Communicate Effectively with Others

The school where I used to work, being an Islamic one, had the
full Islamic greeting instilled in its students from an early age, so
whenever I used to enter any classroom and utter the greetings of
peace, the entire class would reply, waalaykum as-salaam
warahmatul laahi wa barakaatuh (and may the peace and
blessings [of Allah] be upon you) in unison.
It was so beautiful, so pleasing to the ears and I had taken it for
granted! Though I knew I could not have that many duas
showered over me now that I was at home, I made a mental note
to use every talking/meeting opportunity (provided the kids
werent crying or in tantrum-mode) to say the full greeting to
everybody with the hope of receiving the same beautiful greeting;
a small decision with much to yield, In sha Allah.
We meet our brothers and sisters day in and day out. The sunnah
of the Prophet

has taught us everything including manners

(http://productivemuslim.com/building-productiverelationships/#utm_source=ProM-Website&utm_medium=ProMWebsite&utm_campaign=Website-Interlinking)and etiquettes of
communicating with people in meetings, gatherings and
elsewhere. If we were to follow the sunnah when communicating
with people, we would be earning ourselves a great deal of
reward, In sha Allah.
So, lets recall some fantastic communication tips from the
sunnah. But before proceeding, remember that our intentions
must be pure and sincere, and unnecessary communication with
non-mahrams of the opposite sex should be avoided as much as
possible:
1. Smile: The Prophet

said:

Your smiling in the face of your brother is charity. [Jami` atTirmidhi (http://sunnah.com/tirmidhi/27/62)]
Before you start talking, smile! This is an instant ingredient to start
any conversation positively and to remove any past ill feelings that
could be present.

Smiling brings joy to the giver and the receiver (imagine being
both!).
2. Pay attention to the tone and volume: Beware of your tone and
the volume of your voice. Your tone determines whether you will

make your relationship or break it. Any undesirable loudness in


your voice could put people off and make any further attempts to
communicate futile.
And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the

most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys. [Quran:


Chapter 31, Verse 19 (http://quran.com/31/19)]
3. Start with the Islamic greeting of peace: Whether you know this
Muslim or not, the greeting of peace or saying Assalaamu
alaykum (peace be upon you) is recommended. It will repel
hatred and create love between you.
A man came to the Prophet

and said: Peace be upon you! He

responded to his salutation. He then sat down. The Prophet


said: Ten [rewards]. Another man came and said: Peace and Allahs
mercy be upon you! He responded to his salutation when he sat
down. He said: Twenty. Another man came and said: Peace and
Allahs mercy and blessings be upon you! He responded to him
and said when he sat down: and blessings be upon you! He
responded to him and said when he sat down: Thirty. [Sunan Abi
Dawud (http://sunnah.com/abudawud/43/423)]
Habituate yourself with saying the full and complete greeting and
earn 30 rewards every single time you greet someone!
4. Shake hands: Accompany your greeting with shaking hands (if
you are greeting your mahram or a person of your gender).
There are no two Muslims who meet and shake hands, but they

will be forgiven before they part. [Sunan Ibn Majah


(http://sunnah.com/ibnmajah/33/47)]
5. Inquire about people
(http://productivemuslim.com/relationships-reconnect-withpeople/#utm_source=ProM-Website&utm_medium=ProMWebsite&utm_campaign=Website-Interlinking): Ask them how they
are doing and inquire about their health and well-being and that
of their family and friends. They will feel loved and cared for.

6. Remember not all are the same: Consider peoples different


characteristics and differences while communicating. Keep in
mind their age, status, temperament and other factors.
7. Teach at every opportunity
(http://productivemuslim.com/dawah-series2/#utm_source=ProM-Website&utm_medium=ProMWebsite&utm_campaign=Website-Interlinking): The Prophet
used every chance to enjoin the good and forbid the evil. If there
is ever a need for you to say something corrective in nature, do so
gently.
8. Refrain from the common evils of the tongue: People getting
together and communicating with each other often leads to falling
into various sins related to the tongue such as talking about Allah
without knowledge, slandering, lying, insulting and cursing.
These habits are grievous sins that eat away at our rewards and
the barakah in our lives: make it a habit to ensure whether
anything you are about to say may constitute any of these sins.
And, if you were to indulge in joking, let the jokes be true. The
Prophet

said:

A slave (of Allah) may utter a word which pleases Allah without

giving it much importance, and because of that Allah will raise him
to degrees (of reward): a slave (of Allah) may utter a word
(carelessly) which displeases Allah without thinking of its gravity
and because of that he will be thrown into the Hell-Fire. [Sahih alBukhari] (http://sunnah.com/bukhari/81/67)
9. Choose simple, concise words: Avoid complex language and
sophisticated terminologies. Instead, try to stick to concise words
and phrases that are of eloquence and seek to be understood.The
Prophet

said:

I have been given superiority over the other prophets in six

respects: I have been given words which are concise but


comprehensive in meaning [] [Sahih Muslim
(http://sunnah.com/muslim/5/7)].
He

spoke with clarity and made people comprehend easily,

sometimes by even repeating his words thrice.


10. Stay away from argumentation
(http://productivemuslim.com/productive-professionals-9-tips-tominimize-workplace-arguments/#utm_source=ProM-

Website&utm_medium=ProM-Website&utm_campaign=WebsiteInterlinking): Being nice is easy when youre dealing with nice


people. But, practically speaking, this world has more to it than
such people. Despite your best efforts, you are bound to walk into
not-so-nice people. Try not to fall into disputes and
argumentation.
And obey Allah and His Messenger, and do not dispute (with one

another) lest you lose courage and your strength depart, and be
patient. Surely, Allah is with those who are As-Sabirin (the patient
ones, etc.). [Quran: Chapter 8, Verse 46
(http://quran.com/search?
q=and+do+not+dispute+%28with+one+another%29)]
If you realize you are already in a dispute, be wise and argue with
that which is better. Allah

says:

And not equal are the good deed and the bad. Repel [evil] by that

[deed] which is better; and thereupon the one whom between you
and him is enmity [will become] as though he was a devoted
friend. [Quran: Chapter 41, Verse 34 (http://quran.com/41/34)]
If you find the argument going nowhere positive, stop before you
get angry, smile and retreat after trying your best to reconcile for
when a man said to the Prophet

Advise me, he said: Do not

get angry. He repeated his question several times and again the
Prophet

said: Do not get angry. [Bukhari

(http://sunnah.com/urn/2118020)]
11. End with the greeting: Before departing, smile, shake hands
and greet people warmly with the salam.
12. In writing, start with Allahs Name: If you were to communicate
in writing, in addition to the points above that are relevant, it is
desirable to start your written communication with Bismillaahir
Rahmaanir Raheem [In the name of Allah, the Continuously
Merciful, the Especially Merciful]. This was done by the Prophet
numerous times when he dispatched letters to kings and
heads of peoples and tribes.
So that was a list of the basic etiquette from the sunnah on
communicating effectively with people. Smiling and starting with
the salam, speaking kindly and gently, showing warmth by shaking
hands or a hug, giving due respect and/or showing love by
considering the position of whom you are addressing, saying only

that which is good and beneficial, choosing to be patient and kind


over being right, and always ending with a warm smile and the
salam: what a beautiful way to create love in your brothers or
sisters heart for you!
Heres a verse to further motivate you to communicate the sunnah
way:
Whoever comes [on the Day of Judgement] with a good deed will

have ten times the like thereof [to his credit], and whoever comes
with an evil deed will not be recompensed except the like thereof;
and they will not be wronged. [Quran: Chapter 6, Verse 160
(http://quran.com/6/160)]

I hope this reminder of communicating effectively by following the


sunnah has benefited you, inshaAllah. Do share great ways youve
discovered or tried in communicating effectively with others.
I leave you with the best greetings: Wassalaamu alaykum
warahmatul laahi wabarakaatuh! (May the peace and mercy and
blessings of Allah be upon you).
Source:http://productivemuslim.com/sunnah-communicateeffectively/ (http://productivemuslim.com/sunnah-communicateeffectively/)

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