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Table of Contents
Introduction..........................................................................3
1. What is Anxiety, Panic Or Depression And Why Do I
Suffer from Them?...............................................................5
2. How to Deal With Anxiety, Panic and Depression
Effectively............................................................................10
3. Dealing With Panic And Physical Symptoms Of Anxiety 13
4. Dealing With Anxious Thoughts.....................................18
5. Dealing With Depression................................................20
6. Developing Confidence And Self-esteem.......................22
7. Anxiety And Dating.........................................................25
8. Alcohol And Drugs .........................................................27
9. Daily Routines And Applying The Techniques................29
A Few Final Words..............................................................30
Bibliography/Resources......................................................31

Introduction
Hi, I want to start by thanking you for downloading my ebook. The purpose of this
ebook is to share with you some advice and information which has made a massive
difference to the quality of my life and general happiness.
Suffering from anxiety, panic and depression is extremely frustrating, it is like mind,
emotions and body are against you. You are determined to overcome your sufferring
and become the strong, confident, carefree person you used to be. But you just do
not know how. You try and fight it, in a vain attempt to overcome it. But to no
success. You are bewildered and confused. So, naturally you doubt whether you can
actually ever live a happy, anxiety and panic free life.
I have surely but steadily been dealing with my anxiety and depression for the last 7
years. I used to suffer greatly, I had agoraphobia, social anxiety and always felt
anxious. I wont go into much detail but I used to get extremely depressed and felt
empty inside. Simple things like speaking to people became a great ordeal, and I
would panic if someone even called to my house.
I no longer have any problems at all with agoraphobia, and my social anxiety is now
very slight, almost unnoticeable. So much so that I can flirt with girls, even strking up
the conversation myself. I can also initiate conversations with strangers without any
anxiety. I enjoy social situations and getting to meet new people.
I feel at ease with myself. I feel strong inside and have an optimism with which I feel
like I can achieve the goals I set for myself in life. Life is an experience which has to
be enjoyed. And I feel very relieved that I can now enjoy the simple things in life
again. Before my very existence was a struggle. So, now I can appreciate even
mundane, trivial things such as relaxing at home, as I feel calm and can enjoy the
feeling of relaxation that I have in my body and mind.
The tools I have used to help me get my life back on track have been for the majority
down to a woman called Dr. Claire Weekes. It is her method that has saved me.
There are other things as well which have helped me, such as finding a passion in
life, eating right and generally growing as a person. But the root of all this progress is
down to Weekes method.

Unfortunately Dr Weekes is no longer with us as she pass away in 1990. She was an
Australian doctor, who suffered from and developed a cure for the anxiety state.
I want to keep this ebook as short as possible and full of as much value and practical
advice for you, the reader, as I can give. The techniques in this ebook have helped
me greatly, as I can now enjoy the simple things in life again. In order to improve
your present state you will need to continually apply these techniques to yourself.
They are not something you apply once and thats it. They are something you apply
to yourself, learn more about, and then apply to yourself again, and repeat. The act
of applying these techniques to yourself will also give you understanding. You learn
as you practise. So deepening your understanding by re-reading this ebook and
practising by applying are mutually beneficial to each other.

1. What is Anxiety, Panic Or Depression And Why Do I Suffer from

Them?
Such is the lack of understanding of anxiety, panic and depression that you may be
confused about what it really is and why you have it. We all know that anxiety is
feeling worried, or tense and nervous. That panic is simpy panic or extreme fear and
that depression is feeling deep sadness or empty
inside.
But there is a deeper process at work which expalins
all of them. Your sufferings are both physiological as
well as psychological, and it is this physiological role
which is severly misunder-represented in traditional
treatment. The connection between the mind and
body must be understood in order for you to
understand your suffering.

The Nervous System

The mind-body connection seems somewhat mystical. But its actually pretty
straightforward and has been thoroughly scientifically documented. To understand
this I first need to explain to you how your nervous system works. Ever wonder why
when you feel anxious you get accompanying physical symptoms?
The symptoms experienced are unique to each individual sufferer, some may
become light headed, or have shortness of breath, and others may get a churning
stomach, jelly legs or a mixture. The list goes on and on. The same physical
symptoms can happen upon hearing some good news. You get so excited that your
heart palpitates, you feel dizzy and so on. Im sure youve experienced excitment
before where you became giddy or your heart started beating fast.
So, what is the mechanism that makes these physical symptoms happen? The
answer is your involuntary nervous system. Your nervous systems is made up of a
network of nerves in your body, connected from your brain, which is the control

centre, to your organs and limbs. So, how does your brain control the involuntary
nervous system? Read on and Ill tell you.
The answer is by your emotions, or your mood. Moreover, strong emotions. Anger,
frustration, fear, deep sadness, hate, disgust and so on. When you experience such
strong emotions nervous impulses are sent from your brain to your organs and
limbs. For example you feel afraid, so your heart beats fast, the adrenal glands are
stimulated and adrenaline runs through your body making you shake, or your heart
to palpitate, or whatever way the nervous energy is expressed for you.

As you can see in the above image, the nervous system is connected from the brain
by nerves which travel all over the body to our organs and muscles. The involuntary
nervous system is controlled by our emotions. It starts as an electrical impulse in the
brain, which quickly travels around the nervous system. This explains why you feel
anxious, or sometimes get panic attacks. You are simply exciting yourself to bring on
the symptoms you dread so much.

Sensitization
This is all good and well I hear you say but why I am in this anxious state so much,
perhaps constantly? This is because of sensitization. Your nervous system is tired. It
has been recording and processing such strong emotions for a sustained period of
time that it cant cope, and so it becomes fatigued.
So now, even a small anxious thought can be recorded with great severity. You may
see a gas bill thats overdue, or somebody makes a sarcastic comment about you,

and you feel a strong emotion such as fear or anger and your tired nervous system
over responds to this emotion, and you have an anxiety or panic attack.
Is this starting to make sense? I hope so. Really the process of anxiety is quite
simple. No monster has taken hold of you. You are not possessed! It is simply your
nervous system working perfectly, albeit in a tried, fatigued sensitized state. That it is
over-recording your emotions. Your emotions and nervous system are a little out of
sync because they are tired. That is all!
Isnt this great news? It was a great revelation to me and I think it must be to you
too. Because now that we know what is happening we can do something about it!
We know how our emotions have oversensitized our body to exaggerate physical
symptoms. So we dont have to worry about this so much. And this reduction of
worrying means we are giving it less strong emotions to deal with.
Can you now see how a panic attack can happen? We experience fear of something,
our nervous system responds accordingly and brings on the symptoms and we
become further alarmed by these strange symptoms. And so the cycle continues. We
feel fear, adrenaline is released and we feel further fear.
A panic attack is essentially you scaring yourself. You are afraid of the state you are
in, you become further alarmed, and your state of panic increases.
Mental And Emotional Fatigue
So thats physical symptoms and panic explained. How about anxious thoughts? Let
us go through this. When you are anxious, problematic thoughts are running
through your mind. What if this happens? What if that happens? Constant thoughts
of worst case scenarios. So whats the accompanying emotional reaction to these
thoughts? Do you think you are having emotional reactions that your nervous
system will respond to in a calm manner? Of course not! You are experiencing
emotions of fear, frustration, panic, anger and so on. These are strong emotions, and
are recorded by your nervous system, putting your body in a state of fight or flight.
In a state of alarm.
We have already mentioned how these strong emotions make your nervous system
fatigued. But it also makes you mentally and emotionally tired. We have a limited
reserve of mental and emotional energy. Just the same as you can only concentrate
for so long, because you become mentally tried. And it is this mental and emotional

fatigue combined which gives you these anxious thoughts that seem to not go away.
Can you see how this works? You are mentally tired. You cant control the thoughts
you are having. You are not consciously thinking your thoughts. Like when you have
not slept much the night before and songs get caught in your head. Its the same
when you are mentally tired, anxious thoughts stick in your mind. And you are
having emotional reactions to each of these thoughts. Strong, unpleasant emotional
reactions. When you have a What if this happens?thought for example you then
have an emotional reaction of fear. You are depleting your reserves of emotional
energy.
Heres when the depression starts. You no longer have a healthy reserve of
emotional energy. You begin to feel empty inside. Where before you would laugh at
something, you now feel nothing, no emotions. Its like theres a vacuum in your
head, and you cant feel normal anymore. This is depression.
Your mind and body are tired. You need to give them a rest. You need to stop
fighting against yourself. Stop the internal conflict you have with your thoughts, and
stop the tensing against your physical
symptoms. The fighting is causing you
to remain in your physically, mentally,
emotionally, and spiritually fatigued
state.
You need to give your mind and body a
break. It needs to rest from all the
constant work it has been under for
months, maybe years. Stop the fighting
and let go! I know the way you feel is
unpleasant, it agitates you, it scares
you. But it is harmless. You need to
learn to live with it. Then you can live without it. This is key!
Doesnt this explain why tranquilizers work? They calm your mind and your body.
You start thinking less, you have less emotional reactions, you stop tensing against
yourself. And its the same with meditation. You focus your thoughts and stop having
emotional reactions. Your body and mind are relaxed.

This is what we need to do. We need to calm our minds and bodies. But we can do it
without taking medication, and without meditating. I know this may be a big claim
to make. But bear with me and hear me out. Ill explain in the next chapter.

2. How to Deal With Anxiety, Panic and Depression Effectively.

So, we have shed some light on the anxious state you are in. We have highlighted the
approach you are taking in dealing with yourself. Fighting against yourself, against
your thoughts, your emotions, your physical symptoms. Its not working like this,
and its not going to work. We need a change of plan. Let me explain.

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How about trying a different approach to anxiety, panic and depression. How about
instead of tensing from your physical symptoms, instead of fighting them, instead of
trying to not experience them, we stopped resistence to them and just let them
happen. We know that anxiety, panic and depression are due to fatigue, so although
you may find this hard to believe, theres nothing to worry about!
We can live with our anxiety, panic and depression. We can accept it all. Our mind
may race, stomach churn, heart palpitations, and so on. But we can reach the stage
where it doesnt affect us anymore. Where the storm can rage, and we dont mind.
To do this you will need to build your confidence. Right now these sympotms are
very scary to you. Little by little by dealing with it the right way, you can build your
confidence and the symptoms will lose their hold on you. Then it wont matter if
your heart palpiates, stomach churns or if you feel dizzy and so on. Because you will
know that it cant affect you.
This sounds scary right now I know. But this will not make your suffering worse. It is
natural to fight, its like your natural instinct to do so. But by fighting you are feeding
the anxiety, panic and depression. You are already scaring yourself as much as you
can and experiencing the worst with it all. So, why not stop caring so much and be
willing to experience it all? After all has the anxiety, panic or depression ever actually
harmed you before?
When you first do this it may be scary. When I first did this I felt scared, thats for
sure. Its like you are going into the unknown and doing something you havent done
before. I can remember I was sitting in my sitting room, and decided to stop tensing
against the symptoms, I let my churning stomach be, I let the tension be and I let my
mind and body float. I experienced the feelings and symptoms, albeit reluctantly to
begin with.
I let the fear travel all over my body. I could feel the electrical impulses of fear travel
through me. But that was basically it, just impulses of nervous energy. Is it really so
significant? Scary to experience sure, but is it really so scary? I faced and stopped
fighting the panic for about an hour, then it got boring and I stopped caring about it
so much. Sure I still had the symptoms but their hold on me lessened. The act of
mentally and physically letting go eased the anxiety.
I know that to some of you reading this mentioning facing the symptoms and strange
feelings may appear difficult. For years maybe you have tried to push them away.

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But as you do face and let go of resistence by floating your body and mind, you will
begin to see through it and your confidence will grow. And when this happens you
will feel less scared.
Can you see where this is going? When you feel less scared you experience less
strong, unpleasant emotions. So your nervous system begins to refresh itself. Hence,
confidence or loss of fear of the state you are in is extremely important. And this is
built on facing and not fighting against the state you are in. Letting the storm rage,
and not being bothered by it. Not dwelling on it. I ll explain more on this later.
Anxiety is a bluff. You feel like you need to fight against it to keep yourself together.
But this is the bluff. It is the fighting that maintains it. The fighting ensures you stay
in this state. I totally understand this this is more difficult than it sounds. You may
have been in your anxious, depressed state for months or years. And to you it may
be scary as hell. But you can change that.
Little by little the more you face, and stop fighting the more courage you build. The
more that little voice inside you that says Hey, this aint so bad! grows, the more
you begin to come out of your state. And start to see things for what they really are.
This is a very personal experience, and it requires courage. But you are stronger than
what you think. Anxiety and panic has bluffed you for a long time. Now its time for
you to face it and regain your confidence.
There is nothing to fight, no battle to take part in. Stop fighting, stop agitating, stop
tensing, stop running away from these unpleasant emotional and physical
experiences. To put it more clearly what you need to do is the following, as outlined
by Dr. Weekes in her book Self-Help For Your Nerves;
1. Face your physical and mental, emotional symptoms. Stop running away from
your state, face it and understand it is nothing more than sensitization of body
and mind.
2. Stop trying to make them go away by fighting them. Let go and accept them.
Stop fighting against it. Stop tensing against yourself. Stop fghting your anxious
thoughts, trying to work your way out of them. Let go and let your body feel
heavy. Let go of yourself!
3. Stop adding unpleasant emotions. Float and let go of the mental tension. Stop
worrying about the state you are you. You cant work your way out of it. Let it
be. Stop adding strong emotions to your state. Stop trying to work it all out.

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4. Keep doing this until your state improves. Let Mother Nature take care of the
healing process. You need to let the healing happen in its own time! So agree
to yourself that you will live momentarily with how you feel, the strange
sensations, the physical symptoms and so on.
If I was to sum up this method it would be stop trying to ignore how you feel, float
and let it be there, live with it, go about your day. Floating is an extremely powerful
thing. It stops and kills the tension and anxiety in its tracks. How can you be tense
and agitated if you are mentally and physically floating, and have decided to live
momentarily with your suffering. The feeling of floating is a warm, relaxing feeling,
almost like self medicating with a sedative.
Weekes also called it masterly inactivity. The act of letting go both physically by
letting go of the grip you have on your muscles. And also the mental grip you have
on yourself by having a mentally floating feeling. Feel the floating sensations, the
floating vibe. Its tension free and calming. Let it ease your body and mind.
So stop ignoring how you feel, float and live with your suffering momentarily, until
your nervous system and your mind have healed!
Stop being so eager to come out of your state. It takes time. You need to persevere,
you need to keep facing it, not fighting it and not adding mental tension, and leave
the rest to nature for your body and mind to heal themselves. Just like a wound on
your body, it heals at its own time, you cant consciously dictate when it will heal. It
is a natural process. Leave it to nature, and the natural processes that govern your
body.
You can not directly have the goal of getting rid of your anxiety, panic and
depression. This is done indirectly by learning how to live with your suffering. By
letting your suffering be with you throughout your day or whenever it happens to
come. This is the only way to learn how to deal with it.
Acceptance is the cornerstone to recovery. Dr Claire Weekes
Now lets go over anxiety, panic and depression one by one. In the next chapters I
will discuss each of them seperately, going into more detail.

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3. Dealing With Panic And Physical Symptoms Of Anxiety

I have already mentioned that our bodys nervous systems, because of the strong
emotions of anger, frustration, regret, sorrow etc can become tired or sensitized.
And as a result we experience physical symptoms due to our nervous systems
recording these emotions in an exaggerated way. Where before we would be chilled

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out, now we may be panic stricken from the slightest worry.

Before we could speak to strangers and enjoy the interaction, feeling calm and at
ease. But now even bumping into an acquaintance on the street is something we
may dread, as we feel like we dont know what to say, or that we may be nervous in
front of them and these little worries can be exaggeratedly recorded so we panic
and get anxious. Basically we fear having the symptoms or anxious mind in front of
them.
Normally awkward situations would be something we would laugh about, but now
they are blown out of proportion. Social anxiety is just one way these symptoms can
express themselves. They can be associated with many different situations. The
symptoms or expression of anxiety is the same it is the situation that is different. It is
all about dealing with yourself and not the situation you are in.
So it is important for us to focus on ourselves and not where we are or who we are
with. The problem is internal so this is where we must deal with it. This in essence is
facing. Theres a wide range of physical symptoms that you can experience. Here is a
list;

Dizziness
Churning stomach
Difficulty swallowing
Dry mouth
Fast heartbeat
Fatigue
Jelly legs
Muscle aches
Muscle tension
Nausea
Nervous energy
Rapid breathing
Shortness of breath
Sweating
Trembling and twitching

There are many more physical symptoms that you can experience. They can be
unique you. The important thing to note is that they are not dangerous. They feel

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scary for sure! But have they ever harmed you? So the feeling scared is the problem.
And this is what we must address. We must stop feeling scared and start feeling
confident. And the first step in this is by facing how you feel. You can then learn to
live with your symptoms. To learn how to not let them bother you.
After facing you must stop trying to fight against how you feel. Stop tensing against
your symptoms in a vain attempt to make them go away. This will never make them
go away. Only giving up the struggle will make them go away. The agitating will make
them persist. But the goal is not to make them go away, because this is resistence.
The goal is learning how to live with them. Then when you can do this they will go
away in their own time, as your body and mind has time to heal.
Take a deep breath and on the exhale let your body feel heavy. Let go of youself. Let
yourself feel loose. Float and practise living with the anxiety and not letting it get to
you so much. Stop trying to control yourself. I know this may be frightening to
contemplate, you think that by letting go you will fall apart, that you must keep a
hold of yourself. But this is the bluff. It is the trying to hold yourself together that
makes the anxiety persist. Instead, let go! Take it on the chin and continue about
your day. Refuse to let it get to you.
So, what happens when you let go? The symptoms may feel the same. You are facing
and letting go and still your heart palpitates, you stomach churns etc. And as you are
facing it you are more aware of these sympotms, so now at the start you may have
more emotional reactions to them. You may worry more about them. This is where
the not adding strong emotions comes in. This is where the power of letting your
mind float comes in.
The strong emotions you feel are what stimulate the symptoms, this along with the
tensing makes the anxiety happen. So after letting go of your body you must let go
with your mind. Im not saying you make yourself brain dead. You can still think,
albeit not in an anxious way. It is like the state of meditiating, you are aware of what
is happening to your body and how you are experiencing these symptoms but you
stop getting involved with them. You stop trying to make sense out of them. You stop
giving them so much attention. You let it be! You float! You put your mind into
neutral, and stop playing a part in the anxiety!

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It is like having a pebble in your shoe but are too late to arrive somewhere to take it
out. It hurts you when walk. But you cannot take your shoes off. Every step there is
slight pain or discomfort. But it is harmless. You can do two things. You can complain
and get angry that you have this slight discomfort. Or you can say Oh well, its just a
slight doscomfort, I wont let it get to me! And dismiss it. And continue your
journey. If you can do this then after a while of not complaining about it the pebble
disappears!
Ok, so now you are facing, have stopped tensing, and have lessened or stopped
feeling such strong emotions. So now what? Now the symptoms are left to their own
devices. Your body is able to let nature take control. Mother Nature is a lot more
intelligent than you or I will ever be.
Nature controls the processes in our bodies like breathing, the digestive system, the
cardiovascular system. And it can also control our bodies nervous system without us
interfering. So, have faith in it. Have total faith in it. It knows what it is doing more
than you can ever know.
Just think about it. Can you control the processes of your body, like the digestive
process? Of course not. So in a way, are we not being somewhat arrogant by thinking
that we can control our panic or anxiety by interfering with it like we do? We must
let go, Mother Nature will take care of us. Put all your faith in her, she wont let you
down! By doing to she will ease your tired body and mind.
The more you can practise as I have mentioned, then your body will start to refresh
itself. This takes time however, and it is important to realize this. Just like a wound on
the body takes time to heal. You must leave nature to heal it. If you were to pick at it
then it would take longer. And its the same with anixety, the more you pick or fight
at it the less it can heal.
Growing Your Confidence
Each time that you deal with panic or anxiety the way I have mentioned the more
your confidence will grow, because you are seeing it for what it really is. A big bluff. It
is important for you to take note of the times when you deal with it the right way.

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For example in social situation where normally you would tense against yourself, if
you let go and live with it, and leave it to mother nature like I have said then you will
see the situation is not so difficult.
You must take note of such instances, such successes. The more successes you have
and the more you record them, the more reference points you will have of being
able to cope with yourself. This will help reinforce in your memory that you can
manage successfully. Your confidence will then grow and the anxiety will die down.
For this reason it is a great help to keep a journal where you can write down your
moments of success. And then review your success often. This will get you into the
habit of seeing that you can deal with yourself.
Then your confidence will grow. Fears hold on you will die down. And you will
become the confident person you are meant to be. The highs of life will be higher
and the lows much easier to deal with!

4. Dealing With Anxious Thoughts

Anxious thoughts can plague us throughout our days. And of course the
accompanying emotional reactions bring on the physical symptoms. The anxious

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thoughts can be about a situation, a memory, or even the symptoms themselves. In

most cases the anxious thoughts are in the form of questions. Questions for which
we dont know the answer. For example, What if I lose my job? Or, What if I make
a fool of myself in front of everyone?
These questions fool us into getting involved with the thoughts, because there is no
answer. We can spend eternity debating possible answers to them. And at the same
time our bodies are recording the thoughts we have via the emotional reactions we
have, further sensitizing us.
From the constant thinking you are mentally tired. You dont decide to think these
thoughts anymore they just come because of your tired mind. And because they also
bring such strong emotional reactions you are emotionally tired.
Cant you see what you are doing to yourself? And unknowingly too. You are in this
tired, sensitized state and are trying to fight your way out of it, when this is just
prolonging your suffering. And the emotional fatigue means your emotions are all
over the place, out of sync with how they should be.
Heres a list of just some of the emotional and mental symptoms that mental and
emotional fatigue can cause;

Feelings of being spaced out or unreality

Feeling guilty, sorrowful, disgraced
Feel like youre going crazy
Loss of motivation
Loss of confidence
Weird strange thoughts
Depression

The way to deal with anxious thoughts is to let them be there, but not get involved
with them. To stop debating them, stop trying to figure them out. Follow the
method already outlined, not trying to ignore them, stop fighting against yourself,
find a mental place of neutrality where you are not getting involved and let time and
Mother Nature take care of the rest. Following these steps will help you deal with
yourself much more successfully! Learn to experience the thoughts but not believe
in them. Like the physical symptoms learn to live with them and you will get to live
without them. Not letting them bother you is the key!

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5. Dealing With Depression

Depression, the feeling empty, or sad inside is a very unpleasant way to be. You
remember that you used to be happy, but now you feel down. Its certainly an

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unpleasant state to be in. By now Im hoping that you can see that depression is a
result of emotional fatigue.
What do you expect to happen when you are constantly having strong emotional
reactions? Doesnt it make sense that all these strong emotions you are
experiencing will have some effect? But dont worry I am not saying it is your fault.
You are simply the victim of a lack of understanding.
By dealing with your anxious thoughts, and any physical symptoms in the way I have
explained Mother Nature will heal you and your depression will lift. Remember
dealing wtih your emotions is the key. Mentally let go, stop trying to figure
everything out in your mind. Its a bluff, theres nothing to try and figure out. Float
your entire body and mind! Let go!
Natural Distractions
A good way of facilitating this is to become absorbed in something, an activity,
watching a film, or doing some exercise. Do something that will give your mind some
respite, so it can restore its energies. I am not saying to you that you have to
anxiously look for something to occupy yourself. Simply think of something you
would enjoy doing and patiently do it. The thoughts, symptoms and depression may
still be there, but dont dwell on them, carry on doing your activity. Live with how
you feel, and you will heal.
You will see that you will have moments when you will start to experience good
feelings again. This will give you hope. Write it down in your journal along with your
other successes. Cant you now see how great you are doing!
Learn To Control Your Emotions
Our emotions also have a big effect on our abilities to succeed in goals in general.
The stronger you feel inside, and the better mood you are in, the easier you will be
able handle anything life throws at you.
One technique which is especially effective in easing and even banishing negative
emotions is the emotional freedom technique. EFT, as it is known in short is based
on the idea that we can release negative energy by tapping certain chakra points on
the body while focusing on the emotion. It is a short process and each time the

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emotions gets weaker and weaker, until it finally goes. If you experience the emotion
later you can repeat the technique again. And each time it will go to return weaker
and weaker until it is gone altogether.
I think that using such things as EFT can compliment Weekes method, and can help
you a lot. For example to use the EFT you have to say, Despite this (put strong
emotion, ie anger, sadness) that I feel, I deeply and completely love and accept
myself. To adapt this for anxiety you can say, Despite this unpleasant feeling,
annoyance, hatred (and so on) that I feel towards my anxiety I deeply and
completely love and accept myself. Doing this will help you learn to stop fighting
how you feel.
However, dont use this as a crutch. Remember there is nothing wrong with how you
feel. So you need to learn to live with it. However in moments when it is particularly
difficult to do so I recommend EFT.
To learn more about the emotional freedom technique please go to;
http://www.wikihow.com/Use-the-Emotional-Freedom-Technique-%28EFT%29

6. Developing Confidence And Self-esteem.

We all want to be strong and confident, but as an anxiety sufferer, at times we can
feel anything but. Anxiety and loss of confidence can really hold us back from

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achieving our potential. And our self-esteem can be very low. We may feel
worthless. Building confidence and a strong sense of self-worth is thus vital.
Keeping A Journal
One way of doing this is by keeping a journal, which I have already mentioned. At
the end of the day write down how you felt, but also what you managed to do
despite how you felt. Also write down anything esle worthwhile that you have
achieved during the day. If you suffer from depression you could mention that you
felt relatively low while at work but didnt let it get to you and continued on with
your tasks. Or if you have social anxiety, you could write that you spoke to a stranger
despite feeling nervous.
Try and write as much detail as possible. This will help you remember it better when
you later read over your journal in the future. Reading over your journal will make
you remember the times where you experienced anxiety, panic or depression yet
you managed to come through the situation successfully. This consolidates your
belief that you can deal with yourself despite how you may feel. And youll start
seeing yourself as, as well as actually becoming, a strong and confident person!
List Good Things About You
Write down good things about yourself on a page and go over it every day. Negative
thinking is a habit. Doing this will reinforce positive thoughts in your mind.
Whenever you start to think negative thoughts straight away think of your positve
attributes. Learn how to flip negative thoughts into positive ones. For example, I
hate having anxiety it sucks into I am learning to deal with my anxiety and will be a
stronger person because of it!
Body Posture
Also body posture, such as standing up straight and smiling can have a positive effect
as they release feel good chemicals in the brain. This can make you feel more
confident and powerful. Make a powerful pose for two minutes and see how you
feel.
For more see Anne Cuddys TED talk;
http://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes_who_you_are

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Another excellent way to feel good is by trying neuro-linguistic programming

techniques. NLP as it is called is a psychology for the layman. It teaches you how to
change your state of mind using various techniques. Here is a simple exercise to
improve your mood and make you feel good.
1. Think of a time when you felt great. Maybe you had just won something,
passed an exam, or been given praise by someone. If nothing springs to mind
just think of how you would feel if you felt great.
2. Focus on the sensations in your body that thinking about this gives you.
Where in your body are the feelings? Does the feeling have a direction or a
colour?
3. Make the sensations, colour, and movements faster. Make the feelings get
more and more intense and even radiate from your body. Your whole body
now is feeling this sensation of feeling great.
4. Now as the feelings get really intense squeeze your thumb and forefinger
together for a few seconds. The act of doing so means your brain will
associate this action with how you are feeling. This is known as an anchor.
5. To break your state count backwards from 100 to 90.
6. Repeat the exercises a few times to make your anchor stronger.
7. Then you can test your anchor out when you are in situations where you want
to feel a little more confident. Simply put your thumb and forefinger together
and the confident feelings will come back.
As well as speaking to yourself positively you can use visualizations. See yourself
having achieved whatever you want to do or be. Start seeing different areas of your
life as you would ideally like them to be. As well as making you think in a more
positive way, doing this will also increase your motivation to get out there and start
making things happen.
One thing about visualizations though. You can visualize for hours and hours, but
there is no substitute for actually doing. By actually doing what you want to do, you
prove to your brain that you can do it. And this is the most powerful thing. So, use
visualizations together with actually attempting what you want to do!
So the next time you are feeling a little demotivated, or tired then try these
techniques out and see how your mood can improve.
Please work on your self-esteem and confidence daily. Spend even ten minutes

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doing some of the things I have mentioned and get ito the habit of feeling good
about yourself. I cant emphasize enough how important this is. And the knock-on
effect it will have in all areas of your life will be great.

7. Anxiety And Dating

Confidence is very attractive. When someone has a vibe of self-assurance about
them we feel drawn to them. But as a sufferer of anxiety you may be very low on
confidence. So, as an anxiety sufferer, particularly of social anxiety you can
understand why you may be underachieving with the opposite sex. Add this to
feeling depressed and the fatigued, demotivated state you are in and youre lucky if

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you have any libido left.

Whats important for dating isnt just being confident but feeling good about
yourself. The two are closely related. When it comes to dating you are the value you
give yourself. If you believe that you are worthy of a member of the opposite sex this
will come across as you communicate to them. In your tone of voice, body language
and facial expressions as you speak to them. I strongly believe that for men success
with women is for the most part down to your confidence levels and self-esteem.
I have already discussed techniques for building your confidence and self-esteem,
these will help you greatly when improving your dating. The responsibility of
initiating a conversation with the opposite sex is more or less with the guy. We are
men and are expected to behave so. Once you feel strong inside and learn how to
live with your anxiety then things like this become a whole lot easier!
Men and Dating
The techniques of dealing with anxiety that I have mentioned will lower your
anxiety. But lets go throught a typical situation where you see a girl you like and
want to talk to her. You begin to feel nervous. So remember you have to deal with
yourself not the situation. Stop scaring yourself. Take a deep breath, face how you
feel. Float and let go of your body, your arms, shoulders, stomach etc. Dont tense,
put your mind into neutral. Apply the NLP technique I have mentioned.
Dont expect the anxiety to go. Remember it is about dealing with yourself despite
having the anxiety. But now you can manage it more effectively. Now you are dealing
with yourself. Float and let go of yourself and put your faith in Mother Nature, that
she will look after your symptoms and anxious thoughts. Float your entire body
while in the conversation. This will lower and help kill the tension. So remember
always float, in body and in mind! And learn to live with your unpleasant feelings
and sensations. By doing so your confidence will grow. Trust me its worth it!
As your anxiety and depression improve you will feel more attractive to the opposite
sex. And as your libido will also improve you will feel more attracted to them. Also
your confidence will improve as you will be more chilled out in general. You will
become more motivated, and will take better care of yourself. So overall you will
become more attractive to the opposite sex.
You will become at ease with being yourself, and will enjoy interacting with those

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you are attracted to. You will be free from worrying about your anxiety, panic and or
depression. Life in general will become a whole lot easier. And when you can learn to
live with it, when you break the cycle, your body refreshes itself and you will feel
even better.
But to get to this great, satisfying stage you must put the work in. Face, float, let
time pass. Live with the unpleasant feelings, the strange sensations, live with it all.
Keep your journal, and review it. Work on your confidence and self-esteem. If you
commit yourself to this than you can reap the rewards!

8. Alcohol And Drugs

When suffering from anxiety, panic or depression we are truly suffering, so its
natural that we would want to self-medicate with alcohol or drugs. They seem to
help us deal with it easier, give us confidence or even just a break from our suffering.
Whetever benefit you may seem to get however is just temporary, and will make

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your suffering worse.

We must learn to face and deal with our problems head on. Remember we have to
learn to live with our suffering. We dont need crutches. We have to realize that
there is really nothing to get relief from, except for the stress we add on top of
everything. We need to stop stressing out about stressing out. And live with our
suffering. Then you will become so strong inside that you truly will not need any
crutches.
I know that before I would look forward to going home in the evenings to have a few
beers. Or would get drunk at a social situation to reduce the anxiety. But you have to
remember that alcohol is a drug. And it further fatigues our nervous systems, so the
anxiety and panic will get worse. You need your nervous system to regain its
energy. And if your constantly draining it by being hungover you are inhibiting the
natural healing process.
It is also a depressant. What we want to do is improve our mood, not make it worse.
And the hammering you give your body by consuming alcohol further fatigues your
nervous system. Look at how tired your body and mind are the next day., so you can
imagine how tired your nervous sytem is. Your symptoms, physical, mental and
emotional will be exacerbated. So, it is best to either limit it, or cut it out altogether.
One thing that will help you drink less is by drinking more water whenever you are
drinking alcohol. One of the main reasons why people drink so much is because
alcohol dehydrates you and we are fooled into thinking it quenches our thirst. When
really it does the opposite.
Drugs such as marijuana and hard drugs have the same affect. We use them to
escape our troubles. But they take away our motivation, and willpower. We need to
be strong inside, not just to deal with with lifes challenges, but to achieve our goals
and aspirations as well.
Let me assure you, the only drug you need is lto earn how to stop being bothered by
how you feel, to face and float. Float your shoulders, arms, stomach... your entire
body, float your mind. Let your body heal. Peace of body and mind is the best drug
you will ever have. And when you are confident and have the self-esteem you truly
deserve social functions will be so much better. And you wont even feel the need
for alcohol, or anything else. Life itself will be the party!

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9. Daily Routines And Applying The Techniques

Theres a lot of information which I have contained in this little ebook. So, how do
we put it all together. I have already suggested you keep a journal, to write down
your successes and moments where practising the different techniques brought

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improvements.
But I also recommend you make a file, it can be a digital one on your computer, or
physical like the one you may use for work or study and use to file documents and
papers. In it you can write different self-help techniques, like the one I mentioned
for NLP, improving your self-esteem or EFT. Practising the method of not ignoring,
not fighting against the symptoms, floating and letting mother nature heal you is
something that you will continously have to apply and continue relearning for
yourself to manage your anxiety effectively.
I know it sounds like a lot of work but you will only get out of all this what you put in.
So you must start making good, positive habits in your life. And I believe the basis for
all good habits begins with how you manage yourself.

A Few Final Words

Thank you for reading until the end of my ebook. I hope it has been beneficial for
you. My journey to dealing with my anxiety, panic and depression started seven
years ago, and I am still on that journey. I no longer suffer from agoraphobia, panic

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attacks or social anxiety. I do sometimes get tense but I know what it is and I know
how to deal with it.
I believe it was Tony Robbins who said that success is 80% physchological and 20%
the mechanics! And I think its very true. The stronger we are inside the better our
morale is, the better equipped we can deal with any challenges, and maintain our
enthusiasm to achieve our goals, and make life truly worth living.
I wish you the best!
JJ
P.S. I would really love to hear from you. So drop me a line and tell me about your
story! My email is jjmanotomano@gmail.com !

Bibliography/Resources
Image 1: anxious man from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/anxiety/2012/05/are-anxiety-and-ocd-thesame-thing/
Image 2: nervous system from http://www.infovisual.info/03/038_en.html

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Image 3: depression from http://embracingdepression.org/symptoms-of-depression/

Dr. Claire Weekes, Self Help For Your Nerves

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