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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Republican sound bite. Democratic sound bite.

Robert Mankoff (1/11/1999)

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anger bill clinton lewinsky starr impeachment cocktail curly democrat hairline hostile impeachment jackets kenneth lewinsky lines media men monica news parties partisan party politcs pres receding sound soundbite starr straight television ties two washington 164819

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Shouldnt you be reading that to me out loud or something?

Peter C. Vey (1/11/1999)

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bedtime books but children father incompetents loud not out parents read reading reads room sons sons storybook 164820

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mike Twohy (1/11/1999)

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birds captionless christmas death fashion general holidays motto shirts survive survived t-shirt thanksgiving turkey turkeys wears 164821

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John Jonik (1/11/1999)

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captionless christmas crime criminals day depletion evergreen executions forest general lumberjacks massacre mountain nature nicholas reduced stumps tree trees valentines 164822

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This isnt working. We have nothing in common.

Marisa Acocella (1/11/1999)

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affairs bag because boyfriend breaking breaks clothing dating down fashionable fights flared general insecurity jacket left look-alikes love outfit over pants relationships same shoulder ski tote wearing woman working 164823

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill have a bourbon hot toddy. Make that two.


Lets see, Ill have a Kahla and coffee. Ill have a hot buttered rum.
And bring me an Irish coffee, please.

Henry Martin (1/11/1999)

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alcoholic bars beverages buttered cafe snowman coffee drinking general group hot liquor order outdoor people restaurant rum service snow snowmen toddy weather winter 164824

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Arnie Levin (1/11/1999)

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bar bars beer bolts dart darts drink frosty game games general god gods lightning like mugs olympians three throw zeus 164825

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

At this time, the family is grieving and suing.

Frank Cotham (1/11/1999)

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camera courthouse death equipment families general lawsuits lawyers media meet microphones outside press say scenes sue suing wielding 164826

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You always get to be the therapist! I never get to be the therapist!

Mick Stevens (1/11/1999)

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adults boy chair children couch doctors general girl have jobs laying little notes patients psychiatrists psychologists sitting such taking therapists usually 164827

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How much longer are you planning to play the sap?

Bernard Schoenbaum (1/11/1999)

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10

anger fights husband husbands incompetents irritated large living marital marriage paper reading relationships room sap speaks wife 164828

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I remember when they used to give you stationary cubicles!

Gahan Wilson (1/11/1999)

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11

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Victoria Roberts (1/11/1999)

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12

actors against animals antlered bambi books captioned captionless caribou casting children color column dogs dolphins drawing flicka flipper friend general horses lassie little moose movies mutt octopus part peter played rabbit rabbits roberts showing snail snails spotted squirrel squirrels theatre victoria 164830

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How many times do I have to beep you?

Peter Steiner (1/11/1999)

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13

annoyed-looking beepers both call car cellular children doorway general mother mothers pagers playing portable room sons stand telephones toy wearing 164831

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Vengeance is ours, saith Courtland, Mumford & Blaine.

Leo Cullum (1/11/1999)

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14

anger bible client divorce general language lawsuits lawyer lawyers mine motivation office revenge speaks vengeance woman 164832

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (1/11/1999)

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15

above behind books briefs captionless characters city comic fast flies fly flying loses mid-air new off over skyline superheroes superman underwear which york 164833

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We have no mandatory retirement age, Dave, but under


certain conditions we tend to encourage people to die.

J.B. Handelsman (1/11/1999)

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16

age board boss business chairmen collar corporate death desk employee employer employment encourage encouraging executive executives fire firing general leave man mandatory members occupation office older personnel profession professional retirement speaks suicide white work 164834

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Id like to believe were redefining the way future


generations will waste their time.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (1/11/1999)

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17

advances around computer computers fool future games guys laziness lazy office redefine technological technology three waste 164835

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im afraid the celebrities we have tonight


are all from the aluminum industry.

Robert Weber (1/11/1999)

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18

aluminum any asks businessmen celebrities couple d factories fancy general house industry maitre restaurant restaurants there waiters 164836

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youll never go wrong with sunflower seeds.

Charles Barsotti (1/11/1999)

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19

cuisine food general guest low recommends restaurant restaurants seeds service squirrel squirrels sunflower waiter waiters wrong 164837

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (1/11/1999)

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20

all allison allowance anything appreciate arguments battles because bedtime big bite blowing book books border boy broccoli brother but c+ cant captionless categorized chast child children choice chore clothing color commitment computer conflicts consulting contents dad damn daughter deals did -discipline disputes dog dollars dont downloading drugs elephantine english every everybodys father fights find food friends full-page general general-ingratitude gets girl go going gone granted hate head here illuminated illustration includes jail jamie just kids lady liar life like look made make meaning messy messy-room miscellaneous mom mother new nights not now out page pants parent parent-child parents personal-hygiene phone piano pigtails possible quarrels quitting reason replies rhubarbs right room roz ruining run-ins say says school school-related scraps see shaved she shower sibling-associated sister sit skirmishes something son spats squabbles stack stay stick stop stopitstopit stopitstopitstopit stripper stuff supposedly table take teenage ten the there these this three tiffs till toc too touched walk want wearing wedlock week what youre young 164838

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just impeachy, thanks. And you?

Mick Stevens (1/18/1999)

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21

answers bill clinton democratic general government impeach language official party peachy phone play politics pres republican smiles telephones word 164840

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He seems to have lost his focus since he went into politics.

Peter Steiner (1/18/1999)

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22

attacked briefcase business businessmen celebrities conservative costumed eyed fights focus former general glassy gov governor holding jesse minnesota pro pro-wrestler ring sports suit ventura wrestler wrestling 164841

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We never say deathwe prefer deadness.

Frank Cotham (1/18/1999)

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23

burial casket cemetery cliche cliches crying dead deadness death expressions funeral funerals grave graveyard language mourning open over play plot tomb tombstone undertaker wake woman word words 164842

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its ten oclock, and seventy-seven per cent of the people think all is well!

Mike Twohy (1/18/1999)

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24

all bell calls crier criers days olden out people poll polls result surveys town 164843

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Very well put, Harper.

Gahan Wilson (1/18/1999)

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25

another before bows business businessmen down executive general hierarchy management one well 164844

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im trying not to badgerhow am I doing?

Victoria Roberts (1/18/1999)

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26

badger fights general husbands living man marital marriage problems relationships room says she's trying wife wives 164845

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I am not a vengeful man, but I do enjoy


a touch of retribution now and then.

Edward Koren (1/18/1999)

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27

another axe couple dagger fireplace fireplaces gun guns machine mantel motivation over retribution revenge rifle security sits spears swords talking two vengeful violence 164846

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont sing. I do standup.

Sam Gross (1/18/1999)

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28

comedians couple entertainment gondola gondolier international italy regional sing standup venice 164847

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

DINING OUT (1 of 3)

DilemmaVeal or Chicken?

William Steig (1/18/1999)

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29

aperitifs birds card dining food general gourmandish man menu out problems restaurants spread steig two william wst 164848

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

DINING OUT (2 of 3)

Vin Extraordinaire

William Steig (1/18/1999)

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30

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

DINING OUT (3 of 3)

Saucissons Alfresco

William Steig (1/18/1999)

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31

cart city cuisine dining dog dogs food fresco hot low out patron sausage service steig william wst 164849

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool.

Barbara Smaller (1/18/1999)

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32

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Can we get back to you? He seems to have stepped


away from his trousers.

William Hamilton (1/18/1999)

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33

business caller executives general offices phone receptionist receptionists sex telephones trousers 164852

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It comes in midnight gray, charcoal gray, slate gray, and gray.

Mick Stevens (1/18/1999)

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34

clothing colors consumerism customer fashion gray saleswoman shopping shows sweater womens zone 164853

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (1/18/1999)

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35

bad chooses crime crouches desk education empty exam good hubcap hubcaps imaginary loosen mime mimes one other room schools sits steal students study studying teachers teen-age teen-agers the two while 164854

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Remember, the enemy of your enemy is your friend.

Leo Cullum (1/18/1999)

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36

animals backyard cats cliche cliches dog dogs enemy expressions friends general language mice mouse play talking word words 164855

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The Goose That Lays the Golden Eggs is proud to announce shes now
laying two additional lines of eggs: Silver and Platinum.

Michael Maslin (1/18/1999)

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37

announcement announcements egg fable fables fairy king laid medieval myths page reads room royalty stories story tale tales throne 164856

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Best if used before 1/1/2000.

George Booth (1/18/1999)

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38

best bug calendar computer computers cubicle dates expiration glass hands incompetents knees looking magnifying man millennium office technology through y2k 164857

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (1/18/1999)

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39

all baguette blend bread brie cabernet can cant captionless chast cheese chianti crumpet decide describe dining drawings drinking edam euro eurobread eurocheese eurodollar europe eurowine flatbread focaccia food have in incorporates items like lingonberry liqueur loved money mood mozzarella much new now perfect portuguese regional rioja ros roz sauvignon stilton swedens swiss them these three wine works youre 164858

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mind if I thump it? Im a Bible-thumper.

J.B. Handelsman (1/18/1999)

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40

bible cliche cliches court courthouse courtroom expressions guilt guilty innocence innocent judge judicial juries jury language law lawyers legal man oath play religion scenes stand swear system thump thumper thumping trial witness word words 164859

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive had a long day, so I dont want anything


that will put up much of a struggle.

Charles Barsotti (1/18/1999)

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41

animals businessmen dining executive executives general lion lions menu order ordering predator prey restaurant restaurants service struggle talking waiter waiters wild 164860

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Damnwe just missed him.

Danny Shanahan (1/18/1999)

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42

angel angels another cigar cigarettes cigars cloud fitness giant god heaven looking miss missed missing one 164861

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Herein case you ever need a shoulder to cry on.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (1/18/1999)

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43

autopsies box boxes cliche cliches coat cry doctors expressions general holding hospitals lab language man medical operating play rooms shoulder students woman word words 164862

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Matthew Diffee (1/18/1999)

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44

ask beggar beggars bum bums captionless cliche cliches cup expressions hobo hobos homeless homelessness language money person play poor poverty sidewalk sign sitting tin tramp tramps will word words 164863

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Barry Blitt (1/18/1999)

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45

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I have the whole universe to look after,


so Im putting you in charge of this planet.

Sam Gross (1/25/1999)

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46

cloud dumb- earth god heaven kid looking planets pointy-headed sons stands universe whole 164865

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I think Republicans and Democrats alike


can agree that Frank Shustermann is dead.

Peter Steiner (1/25/1999)

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47

burial cemetery coffin corpse death democratic eulogy funeral funerals gives grave graveyard mourning party pastor plot politics priest republican tomb tombstone wake 164866

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yet another apology.

Tom Cheney (1/25/1999)

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48

adultery age apology cave caveman clinton drops head large men own politicians rock sex spear stands stone top washington 164867

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This digital revolutioncan we muscle in on that?

Robert Mankoff (1/25/1999)

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49

around capo cliche cliches computers conference crime criminals digital expressions gang gangsters internet language mafia meetings mob mobsters organized other play revolution sitting table technology word words 164868

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Perhaps we could tell the international investment


community that were sorry.

J.P. Rini (1/25/1999)

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50

apologizing apology bill brokers clinton disasters economy government impeachment international investors kenneth kremlin leaders lewinsky look market monica moscow onto out overcoming pres recent refers regional role russia russian scandal starr stock stocks suggest world 164869

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Camouflage becomes you.

Victoria Roberts (1/25/1999)

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51

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, no, nostay as late as you want. In fact, divorce me.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (1/25/1999)

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52

armchair coming divorce fights general home husband husbands late living marital marriage phone relationships room talking telephones woman 164871

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good news, Mr. Pickettits just a slow leak.

Danny Shanahan (1/25/1999)

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53

age cliche cliches doctor doctors exam expressions fitness language leaks male medical patient patients play sagging sitting table word words wrinkled wrinkles young 164872

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

After all these years together, the mating is still reasonably good.

Edward Koren (1/25/1999)

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54

animal animals another baby children couple dog dogs dozens family friend fuzzy general good litter little marriage mating near playing reasonably relationship sex talk their them 164873

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (1/25/1999)

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55

announcers anything books cant come crisis general media radio read reading say saying sports sportscasters studio talk three 164874

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I preferred their Take a number system.

Mike Twohy (1/25/1999)

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56

blindfolded blindfolds blindmans bluff buff business butcher butchers childishness chooses customer deli delicatessens games management next number numbers prefer preferred preferring take 164875

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Arm candy.

Edward Frascino (1/25/1999)

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57

birds cranes daddies dating fowl general gorgeous guy heron stork tropical other park parks peacocks pigeon pigeons relationships scenes sugar talking two water whisper 164876

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

For the profits of which we are about to partake, we give thanks. Amen.

Mick Stevens (1/25/1999)

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58

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

George Booth (1/25/1999)

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59

bill blowviatt cameraman capitol clinton congressman converge demands ethics fist front government half-truths impeachment kenneth lewinsky lies man media microphone monica morals more office out oval politics pres raised sex shiftiness spins starr subterfuge taradiddle taradiddles washington whoppers 164878

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

George Booth (1/25/1999)

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60

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

George Booth (1/25/1999)

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61

appearance asked avoid bed bedroom been bill blowviatt box cameras clinton congressmens exposure flynts house hustler impeachment kenneth larry lewinsky magazine manager monica nightstand peccadilloes pizza playing pres publ reads reference republican scenes sexual starr this washington week 164880

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John Jonik (1/25/1999)

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62

alcohol all allowed automobiles ball beach beaches behind belts bicycles bike captionless cigarettes cigars climbing drinking drinks fires fireworks general helmets insurance insuranceville jogging ladders limit lists not objects outside playing pools power reads required road roller running rural seat second sharp sign signs skates skating smoking speed swimming things third this tools town tree trees various welcome 164881

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And they say electric cars arent practical.

Robert Weber (1/25/1999)

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63

auto automobiles car consumerism dealers dealership electric inventions out practical shoots shopping showrooms toast toasters top useless 164882

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Maslin (1/25/1999)

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64

booth booths central city grand information new reads regional station whazzup york 164883

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The foods great, but the chef s a tyrant.

Charles Barsotti (1/25/1999)

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65

another chefs cooks food king one restaurants royalty together tyrants walk 164884

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (2/1/1999)

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66

automobiles back belt belts cab general message no passenger reads recorded says seat seat-belt sign signs talk talking taxi taxis 164886

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The very survival of our society depends upon the just


compensation of our professional athletes.

Frank Cotham (2/1/1999)

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67

age athletes bones cave cavemen fire general men salaries sitting society sports stone surrounded survival talking three 164887

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Give me a break, Doctor.

J.B. Handelsman (2/1/1999)

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68

adams bedside big clown clowns doctors general handelsman hospital medical movies nose noses patch patients red robin stethoscope williams woman 164888

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tiffany tells me you were at Sundance.

Mort Gerberg (2/1/1999)

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69

bar bars costume cowboy director directors face fashion festival film fringed general how introduction man meeting movie movies outfit photography see sizing western woman's would 164889

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your squash medley will be right out, sir.

George Booth (2/1/1999)

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70

accidents air another customer door food general hurtling incompetents kitchen medley restaurants service squash through trips waiter waiters 164890

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, God, am I housebroken.

Charles Barsotti (2/1/1999)

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71

animals complains couch dog dogs general housebroken psychiatrists psychoanalyst psychologists talking 164891

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (2/1/1999)

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72

against brand cliche cliches expressions giant gigantic language leans lumberjack lumberjacks made pencil pencils play sequoia sequoias sized trees wood word words 164892

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes big, all right, and hes definitely a wolf, but itll be
up to a jury to decide whether or not hes bad.

Michael Maslin (2/1/1999)

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73

animals away bad big brick crime fairy general house juries lead little look officers outside pigs police tales talking three trials two wolf wolves 164893

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

For Gods sake, Edwards. Put the laser pointer away.

Leo Cullum (2/1/1999)

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74

around blown boardroom executives guns guy head inventions just laser meetings off one pointer presenter ray sit table technology toys violence 164894

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You tell them were not ready to make nice


until theyre ready to make nice.

Bernard Schoenbaum (2/1/1999)

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75

another desk executive executives language lawsuits lawyers make nice one play standing word 164895

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats nothing. My mom is older than the Superbowl.

William Hamilton (2/1/1999)

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76

age aging analogies analogy another bag boy championship children citizen citizens cliche cliches couch elderly expressions football game games general groceries holding language little mother mothers nfl old one play remote senior sitting sport sports walks word words 164896

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would you like to take your old face?

Mike Twohy (2/1/1999)

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77

bag doctors doggie face facelift general hospitals leftovers medical offices patient patients picks plastic post receptionist receptionists restaurant restaurants surgery were 164897

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It was a little preachy.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (2/1/1999)

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78

being churches clergy congregation criticizes female language member minister preachy priest religion sermon speeches vicars 164898

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Among them, my children have eighteen years of accumulated


experience harassing their mother!

Edward Koren (2/1/1999)

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79

children discipline experience family frazzled friend general harass hockey holds mothers older problems son stick stroller three youngest 164899

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He says he wants a lawyer.

Tom Chalkley (2/1/1999)

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80

american another general hand interprets language lawyers monkeys monkeys researcher scientists sign signalsto 164900

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its a full-bodied wine with hints of acrimony,


partisanship, and moral outrage.

Leo Cullum (2/8/1999)

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81

acrimony bill clinton clinton lewinsky describes general impeachment man moral outrage partisanship politics pres restaurant restaurants seated trial waiter waiters washington wine 164901

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Of course you know Congressman Beasley.

J.B. Handelsman (2/8/1999)

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82

bill campaign campaigning candidate civil clinton clown clowns cocktail election events gatherings government impeachment incompetents introduces introductions know leisure lewinsky man mingling monica official parties party platform political politicians politics pres social socializing suit washington woman 164902

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What about the redemptive power of my art?

Lee Lorenz (2/8/1999)

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83

artist artists artwork gate general heaven heavens let painter peter redemption redemptive refuses scornful 164903

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What have you been up to?

Gahan Wilson (2/8/1999)

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84

answers bound coming crime door gagged general home husband husbands late line marriage police relationships returned tape wife work wrapped yellow 164904

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sometimes its important to stop whatever break


youre taking and just do the work.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (2/8/1999)

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85

advises break breaks businessmen coffee employee executive boss executives general hierarchy important incompetents management office older work workers 164905

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed,


so youll have to bring yourselves up.

David Sipress (2/8/1999)

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86

bring children daughter exhausted burnt failure family general out overwhelm parents raise rear small son stress tell themselves two will 164906

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When we have fun, we really have fun.

Victoria Roberts (2/8/1999)

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87

age armchairs boring eachover facing fun husband husbands marriage middle middle-aged relationships sit speaks wife 164907

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The first winter is always the toughest.

Danny Shanahan (2/8/1999)

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88

bumps comforts covering experienced fish head heads ice lakes more older several talking tough winter young 164908

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Id like you to meet our director of scratch-and-sniff advertising.

Frank Cotham (2/8/1999)

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89

advertising ball bed bespectacled big cliche cliches desk dog dogs dogs executive executives expressions fangs floor general human into introductions language magazines man meet meeting next office play scratch-and- sits sniff ushering where word words 164909

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sidney Harris (2/8/1999)

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90

cliche cliches expressions food general health healthfood keeper language outside play salt scattering shop sidewalk store storefront substitute winter word words 164910

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Shortly after I realized I had plenty, I realized there was plenty more.

William Hamilton (2/8/1999)

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91

background class club clubs drinking greed hangs hunting language men mens money more opulence painting people play plenty rich smoking upper wealth wealthy word 164911

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I had a nice time, Steve. Would you like to come


in, settle down, and raise a family?

Robert Mankoff (2/8/1999)

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92

after apartment cliche cliches date dates dating down expressions family general into invites language love man marriage nice play proposals relationships scenes settle social time woman word words 164912

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your offers a crumpled little ball in the middle of my desk.

Bernard Schoenbaum (2/8/1999)

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93

anger businessmen crumpled desks executive executives general office paper phone telephones 164913

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Stuart Leeds (2/8/1999)

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94

age aging car cars cemetery cliche cliches death driving expressions gravemarker gravestones graveyards language lewis1939 pierson play reads sixty speed steven time tombstones went william word words zero 164914

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im told that you respond very well to intimidation.

Peter C. Vey (2/8/1999)

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95

boss employee executive executives general hierarchy intimidates intimidating management office response 164915

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Warren Miller (2/8/1999)

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96

askance board book books businessman captionless children city class could engine into little looks new prepare pulls reading school schoolchildren schools station stories story subway subways teacher teachers trip york 164916

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Cheney (2/8/1999)

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97

another around businessmen captionless corner cubicles curious each general hide looking looks man nosey office other over partition peeking peeping people seek their walls woman workers 164917

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its not as if I invented the food chain.

Charles Barsotti (2/8/1999)

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98

animals businesmen chain executive executives fittest food human invent invented jungle king lion lions smaller survival talking walk 164918

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I love these bipartisan gatherings, dont you?

J.B. Handelsman (2/8/1999)

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99

angels arches bipartisan campaign campaigning candidate civil clubs cocktail cocktails demons devils election enjoy gothic government group groups heaven hell meetings members official organizations ornate parties platform political politicians politics together under washington 164919

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill trade you my soy milk for your wheatgrass juice.

Harry Bliss (2/8/1999)

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100

children eating food foods health healthy items juice little lunch lunchboxes lunchtime milk school schoolgirls soy swap trade trading two wheatgrass 164920

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Where do you get off saying my kid is grade level?

Barbara Smaller (2/8/1999)

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101

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (2/8/1999)

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102

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over panels piece plain plateaus play please plus points pricetag restaurant right rotten roz ruined scientist scotch sculpture sex sits smoking sold soldier spoiled stands staying street stupid styles such surrounded thanks thats the their thinking titles tofu took twenty two ugly wanna want war wars water went whats which woman word world you 164922

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mike Twohy (2/15/1999)

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103

adultery affair affairs bill card cards category cheat cheating clinton consumerism greeting holidays impeachment inappropriate lewinsky monica pres president relationship scandal sees sex shop shopping valentines washington woman women 164923

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Steiner (2/15/1999)

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104

cliche cliches computer computers contains e-mail expressions hate home informs internet language mail man office play screen technology word words working 164924

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The yeas have it. Censure, and well give you a running start.

Tom Cheney (2/15/1999)

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105

bill cave cavemen clinton clubs government impeachment language leaders lewinsky men monica neanderthal one political politics pres running start their washington 164925

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im afraid theres really very little I can do.

Gahan Wilson (2/15/1999)

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106

anxious cemeteries cemetery cliche cliches death doctor doctors doing expressions grave ground holds husbands language patients play site stands stethoscope stethoscopes widow word words 164926

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youre so organized!

Robert Weber (2/15/1999)

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107

another bedroom children extremely furniture general incompetents kid mess messy one organization organize organized scenes skill skills 164927

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What do you have in investment-grade reds?

Edward Koren (2/15/1999)

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108

brokers clerk customer grade investment investments liquor market shop stock stocks stores wine wines 164928

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now that the kids are grown and gone, I thought it


might be a good time for us to have sex.

Robert Mankoff (2/15/1999)

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109

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Maslin (2/15/1999)

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110

ample automobiles captionless city general god gods heavens jersey jerseys manhattan meadowlands metro myths new parking regional runs spurns through toga york 164930

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we


could get together and have screaming tantrums.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (2/15/1999)

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111

anger childish children clubs forum friends general girl group groups little meetings members organizations psychology suggests three 164931

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is my clients videotaped depositionplease be


considerate and rewind after viewing.

Frank Cotham (2/15/1999)

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112

before bench considerate court courthouse courtroom general guilt guilty holding innocence innocent judge judicial juries jury law lawyer lawyers legal male recorders scenes stands system tape television testimony trial video witness 164932

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My name is Ozymandias, king of kings: Look on


my works, ye Mighty, and despair!

George Booth (2/15/1999)

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113

busy bysshe city construction general head highness king majesty manhole manholes mediaeval medieval monarch monarchy new nyc out percy poems quotes regal royal royalty ruler scenes shelley shelleys sire sticking street workman workmen york 164933

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youd better cool it. Remember what he did to you last time.

Charles Barsotti (2/15/1999)

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114

bar bars belligerent cliche cliches cool expressions fight fights general language man mightier nib not pen pens pick play sword swords than warns word words 164934

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bernard Schoenbaum (2/15/1999)

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115

accidents automobiles beat-up been car crash driving dummies dummy expressway general man number obviously test which woman 164935

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We cant wear vintagewe are vintage.

Barbara Smaller (2/15/1999)

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116

age another appearances attic attire boutique chloes clothes clothing fashion front general looks middle older one sales shop shopping store stores style trend trendy vintage woman womens 164936

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (2/15/1999)

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117

all also barr belong bill blue bluish bob cards clinton current day drawing especially fervor for gets greeting happy heaven henry house hyde impeachment jewish jowls just lewinsky lowly mccollum monica morally more not party politics pres prominent quiverin red reddish rep republican republicans rhymed right righteous roses shiverin sinner speaking start sugar three-panel trial valentines valentines violets washington were when where white whitish winner wrong youre 164937

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, lad, we arent movers. Were just Shakers.

Mick Stevens (2/15/1999)

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118

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Looks like crime is down.

Sidney Harris (2/15/1999)

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119

9-5 crime criminal criminals crooks door hours house m-f man mugging nypd outside police precinct read rob robbery sat sign signs stand station store sun thieves woman 164938

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Theres a twenty in it for you if you just keep moving.

J.C. Duffy (2/15/1999)

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120

bench benches bribe bribes causing cupid dating duffy fall general into love man myths next not park parks relationships scenes sitting tries unattractive woman 164939

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

James Stevenson (2/22/1999)

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121

being bribe cell city collar convict correctional court courthouse crime criminals escape ethics facility handcuffs incarcerate incarcerated incarceration instead jail lake led man officer olympic olympics past police prison prisoners reading regional rings salt sign sports utah wearing white wrists 164940

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ed Arno (2/22/1999)

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122

bureaucracy cliche cliches dept door expressions jersey language n new play reads regional sign signs word words york 164941

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

That was fun. What time does the next trial of the century start?

Jack Ziegler (2/22/1999)

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123

bill case cliche cliches clinton couple court expressions finishes general impeachment language law legal play politics pres senate television trial trials tv watching word words 164942

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ham Khan (2/22/1999)

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124

cliche cliches doctor doctors examination expressions fashion fitness get health heart hearts incompetent language listen logo logos love m.d. man's medical mens new nurse ny patients physician play shirts soon stethoscope t-shirt uses well word words york 164943

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Did you hire a consultant? I didnt hire a consultant.

Charles Barsotti (2/22/1999)

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125

business businessmen closed consultants eastern execs executives eyes floor folded guru hands hire hiring incompetent look management puzzled religions sits 164944

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Nothing. I just called to say


I found a working pay phone.

Michael Crawford (2/22/1999)

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126

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward Koren (2/22/1999)

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127

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hear the streets are paved with garbage.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (2/22/1999)

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128

ancient another cliche cliches eldorodo expressions garbage gold history language one play rat rats rodent rodents rubbish streets trash variations word words 164947

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Perhaps if we could think of me sitting here as


an art installation, that would help.

Victoria Roberts (2/22/1999)

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129

art artist artistic artwork canvas chair couch easy galleries gallery general humanities husband husbands installations marriage museum museums newspaper painter painting reading relationships sculpt sculptor sculpture think wife 164948

1999

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Arnie Levin (2/22/1999)

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130

ancient bricks buildings city cloud down god gods greece greek greeks hurling lightning mythological mythology new standing urban york zeus 164949

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

His final wish was that all his medical bills be paid promptly.

Frank Cotham (2/22/1999)

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131

bill bills care cliche cliches comforts death debt doctor doctors dying expressions final general grieving husbands intensive language money outside patients pay payment play prompt request unit widow widows wish word words 164950

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Things have gotten bad here.


Theres talk of a war with another gated community.

Mick Stevens (2/22/1999)

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132

appointed bad battle cliche cliches communities community expressions fight fighting fights gated having home insecurity language neighborhood play security suburban suburbia tea two violence war wars well women word words 164951

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (2/22/1999)

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133

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mind if I take a moment to check with my sex therapist?

Bernard Schoenbaum (2/22/1999)

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134

bed bedroom check couple dating incompetent insecurity intercourse man marriage nude phone picks psychiatrists psychologists relations relationships scenes sex sexual telephones therapist therapy 164953

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Christopher Weyant (2/22/1999)

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135

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

George Booth (2/22/1999)

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136

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tell me againwhich blond actress is she the blond-actress daughter of?

Warren Miller (2/22/1999)

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137

acting audiences celebrities celebrity child children color couple daughters exiting fame family famous film hair hollywood middle-aged mother movie movies parent relative star theatre 164956

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im living proof that life begins at forty-three.

Peter C. Vey (2/22/1999)

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138

age aged babies baby bar bars childishness cliche cliches crisis diaper diapers expressions general language life man middle midlife play word words 164957

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is that you, Pumpkin?

Sam Gross (2/22/1999)

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139

animal animals cat cats chinese coming cuisine deliver delivery door doors food general hand home husbands low menu menus name names pet slips speaks through woman 164958

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im making a bundle on Wall Street, but its


not what I really want. What I really want is
to make a bundle uptown.
Robert Weber (2/22/1999)

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140

brokers city class cocktail dream dreams location man market money new opulence party people rich stock stocks talking upper uptown wealth wealthy woman york 164959

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey, Im just happy the transplant worked at all.

Robert Mankoff (2/22/1999)

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141

cliche cliches cocktail events expressions feet foot gatherings hair head heads incompetent introductions language leisure man medical mingling parties party play shod shoe shoes social socializing transplants woman word words 164960

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.B. Handelsman (2/22/1999)

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142

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Leo Cullum (2/22/1999)

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143

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Keep your eyes on your own screen.

Barbara Smaller (2/22/1999)

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144

cheat cheating children classroom cliche cliches computers education elementary exam expressions eyes front language monitor personal play pupil quiz school schoolroom screen sit student students teach teachers teaching technology test tests word words 164963

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would you mind turning down your Walkman just a little!

Gahan Wilson (2/22/1999)

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145

analyst anger complains during general ignore ignoring incompetent listening patient psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologists psychology psychotherapist radio radios session therapist therapists therapy turn 164964

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., well walk, but dont feed the street life.

Danny Shanahan (2/22/1999)

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146

animals beggar beggars bum bums city cliche cliches concrete cup daughter expressions feed hobo hobos homeless homelessness jungle language life mom new people pigeons play poor poverty rats rich scenes street stylish sunglasses take tin tramp tramps upwardly-mobile urban wearing wildlife word words york 164965

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The social conservative in me tells me to pay for dinner, but the


fiscal conservative thinks we should split it.

David Sipress (2/22/1999)

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147

bill check chivalry conservative conservatives date dates dating discussing dutch general how independance independant man manners pay restaurants social split 164966

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bye-bye, sweetie. Daddy and I


will pick you up when youre eighteen.

Peter Steiner (2/22/1999)

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148

boy care child children day drops eighteen general growing grown incompetent little mom off parent parenting parents pick raise raising rearing she up 164967

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Stuart Leeds (2/22/1999)

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149

authority bar barroom bars bartender beer booth booze bridge bridges charge city cliche cliches cover drinking drinks expressions fare general hike house language minimum money mta new nightclubs play pub public reads restaurants sign tavern toll transit tunnel tunnels two-drink urban word words york 164968

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

R. Sikoryak (2/22/1999)

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150

city commute commuter magazine magazines manhattan mass media neighborhoods new news newspaper newspapers nyc paper papers periodical periodicals publication publishing rail railroad regional tabloid tabloids train trains transit transportation travel urban york yorker 174401

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., on my signal were going to shift from pre-millennial


to post-millennial thinking.

Robert Mankoff (3/8/1999)

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151

board chairman communications executive executives head language meeting meetings millennium others post-millennial table think thinking y2k 164969

1999

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Mick Stevens (3/8/1999)

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152

bag baseball captionless catch field general greed money pay player salaries salary sport sports spring training 164970

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I got another callback. My agent says its between


me and the guy whos going to get it.

Pat Byrnes (3/8/1999)

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153

acting actor actors agency amateur cast coffeeshop compete competition counter employment friends general incometents part restaurants role service theatre young 164971

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He refuses to let me get on with the grieving process.

Danny Shanahan (3/8/1999)

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154

black casually corpse death decaying fights friend general grief grieving humor husband husbands living marital newspaper phone process reading relationships room sits telephones wife 164972

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I cant decide whether to specialize


in criminal law or legal punditry.

Peter Steiner (3/8/1999)

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155

academic building campus college crime criminals general law lawyer lawyers learned learning major opinion outside school source students subject two 164973

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry, wrong room.

Frank Cotham (3/8/1999)

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156

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If, indeed, there is a reason for all this, than thats so much worse.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (3/8/1999)

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157

cliche cliches discuss expressions language life living meaning philosophy play reason room sitting sofa two while women word words worse 164975

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Heres a nice one. It was confiscated from a little old drunk lady.

Warren Miller (3/8/1999)

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158

automobiles car cars city consumerism crime customer dealer dealers drivers driving drunk general giuliani impound impounded law laws mayor new rudolph shopping used york 164976

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The skin on the organic chicken was thick and greasy, so I got rid of it.

George Booth (3/8/1999)

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159

ate breakfast chicken collapsed cooking crazy-looking dinner dog dogs eat eating fitness food foods housewife husband ill kitchens lies organic refrigerator rid sick skin table 164977

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

World War III? Hmm. O.K., but, remember,


nobody gets hurt.

Robert Weber (3/8/1999)

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160

army clause fight fighting flag generals giant global government hurt incompetents injure injured injury look map military pins plan plans room rule rules strategy wars 164978

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sorry, but you have to be here the minute the doors open
if you want worm.

Charles Barsotti (3/8/1999)

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161

bird birds catches cliches customers early food general menus order popular restaurant restaurants sayings special takes waiter waiters worm 164979

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Daddys way of helping you with your homework is not to help you.

Leo Cullum (3/8/1999)

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162

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If Heather has two mommies, and each of them has


two brothers, and one of those brothers has another man for a roommate,
how many uncles does Heather have?

William Haefeli (3/8/1999)

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163

arithmetic books characters children classroom education elementary families family gay homosexual homosexuality homosexuals lesbian lesbians marriage math modern mommies mothers problems relationship relationships relatives roommate school schools schoolteacher sexuality teachers two uncles 164981

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Shouldnt Willis be in the bed and his imaginary monster under it?

Gahan Wilson (3/8/1999)

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164

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (3/8/1999)

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165

adjusts age bank brain captionless chast chips depicting doctors drawings due fax four heads history inside loss machines medicine memory middle one ones roz science various ways wood 164983

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I made a bid for the Senate, but this is as far as I got.

Frank Cotham (3/15/1999)

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166

bar bars beggars campaign campaigning candidate civil cups down election elections general government men official out platform political politicians politics tin tramps two washington 164984

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We need to investigate a stupidity cluster in accounting.

Leo Cullum (3/15/1999)

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167

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, good. My complete sexual history is on tonight.

Peter Steiner (3/15/1999)

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168

bill broadcast clinton complete entertainment front general guide holding lewinsky living man monica president prime-time program programming room sex show showing shows talking television their tv wife 164986

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sam Gross (3/15/1999)

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169

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mike Twohy (3/15/1999)

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170

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hed rather be home by himself, staring into space.


I cant compete with that.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (3/15/1999)

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171

affairs another city compete competition down fights general home husbands love marital marriage one relationships scenes staring street walking woman women 164989

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., then. You may kiss, shake hands, and come out married.

Michael Maslin (3/15/1999)

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172

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Kids, your mother and I have spent so much money


on health insurance this year that instead of vacation
were all going to go in for elective surgery.

Jack Ziegler (3/15/1999)

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173

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Son, can you spare a couple of minutes to talk about your tuition?

Robert Weber (3/15/1999)

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174

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its no disgracesomebody has to be plain vanilla.

Charles Barsotti (3/15/1999)

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175

analyst analysts butter cone couch cream depression disgrace esteem flavor flavors ice insecurity kind patient pecan plain psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologists psychology road rocky self session some somebody therapist therapists therapy vanilla 164993

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Most of these pelts were suicides.

Arnie Levin (3/22/1999)

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176

animal clothing coat coats fashion fur pelts rights salesman shopper suicide woman womens 165000

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward Koren (3/22/1999)

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177

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is there a letter t?

Mike Twohy (3/22/1999)

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178

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Marisa Acocella (3/22/1999)

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179

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Christopher Weyant (3/22/1999)

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180

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1999

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He had himself pierced once too often.

Frank Cotham (3/22/1999)

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181

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1999

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You know what? Im sick of clothes. I decided


to go for a window treatment instead.

Peter Steiner (3/22/1999)

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182

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1999

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Have I told you about my new belt?

Richard Cline (3/22/1999)

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183

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry to crash the party, folks, but all the little people
that made it happen were just discovered buried in
a shallow grave outside Bakersfield.

Danny Shanahan (3/22/1999)

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184

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What do you think?

George Booth (3/22/1999)

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185

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gimme a break. Being driven out of Ireland was


the best thing that ever happened to you.

Leo Cullum (3/22/1999)

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186

bar bars beer days disgruntled driven foreigners general immigrants irish man martinis olden out over patrick saint snake snakes talks 165011

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (3/22/1999)

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187

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My goodness, Marion. Our dishes are so spotless I can


see deep within my hollow, tormented soul!

J.C. Duffy (3/22/1999)

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188

chores dishes domestic duffy examines freshly general hollow household housekeeping husbands kitchen man marriage plates dishes psychiatry psychology reflection relationship spotless washed 165012

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Crawford (3/22/1999)

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189

arrow arrows back crawford direct directing direction directions end fashion incompetents life michael model models modern road runway show signs tells trends turn women 165013

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Marie, are you still driving?

Eldon Dedini (3/22/1999)

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190

accidents age aging another automobiles autos car cars citizen citizens city drive driving elderly general meter old overturned parking safety scenes senior sitting still street woman 165014

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

For Gods sake, how longs that been there?

Charles Barsotti (3/22/1999)

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191

awkward embarrassed embarrassing fork forks hair piece prongs spaghetti spoon stuck utensil utensils 165015

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Believe me, with the Equalizer, here,


youll never take any crap from an S.U.V. again.

Robert Mankoff (3/29/1999)

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192

affixed army automobiles believe car dealer dealers gun guns large roof sell sports tank tanks tries utility vehicles 165017

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I take it you want to go for a perp walk.

Danny Shanahan (3/29/1999)

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193

armchair coat crime criminals dog dogs head its language man over play waits walking word 165018

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were going to start with the birds and the bees and then work
our way up to the new reproductive technologies.

Barbara Smaller (3/29/1999)

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194

bees birds books children education father fathers general reading sex small son wife 165019

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If you ask me, the fire has the most potential,


but its the smoke that has people talking.

John Caldwell (3/29/1999)

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195

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just take a seat, Mr. Bern. Youre acting as if you


were the only one here whos been shot.

Mike Twohy (3/29/1999)

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196

crime criminals dragged emergency guns himself hospitals into man medical murder receptionist room shot violence 165021

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your offer to compromise has been rejected


and your dog has been cast out.

George Booth (3/29/1999)

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197

another being cast castle clipboard compromise dogs general hurling man medieval out rack times torture torturer turned while window 165022

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Somehow, in all the confusion, I aged.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (3/29/1999)

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198

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its all about the milk.

James Stevenson (3/29/1999)

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199

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats just great. I discover the cure for the common


cold and all you can do is criticize.

Christopher Weyant (3/29/1999)

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200

capsule criticize cure drugs general huge lab medical medicine pills science scientists table two 165025

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

String quartets! Minor rhapsodies! Little symphonies!

Jack Ziegler (3/29/1999)

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201

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.C. Duffy (3/29/1999)

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202

ascot beer coffee duffy for general introspection jacket liquor looking machine man mervyn mister mornings mr pipe psychology quiet rear smoking time view were 165027

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your wifes also asking that you rot in hell for eternity,
but I think thats negotiable.

Michael Maslin (3/29/1999)

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203

divorce eternity general hell lawyer lawyers man marriage negotiable office relationships rot 165028

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sam Gross (3/29/1999)

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204

cat cats death galleries game games general gun guns hole into involves mice mouse pinball plays shooting which 165029

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry, Dad, but its time to consider a retirement kingdom.

Frank Cotham (3/29/1999)

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205

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.B. Handelsman (3/29/1999)

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206

angel answers bedside just man maybe myself nobody not now only parchment prayer praying read says schmuck this tomorrow what when which will 165031

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How much for a poster?

Danny Shanahan (3/29/1999)

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207

agencies agent casually consumerism dressed man posters prices travel 165032

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Charles Barsotti (3/29/1999)

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208

beware dog dogs fear fears general image images insecurity mental near psychology says self sign signs standing thinking what 165033

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im just a simple man preceded by an inordinately complex reputation.

Victoria Roberts (3/29/1999)

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209

approaches cocktail complex drinks language man parties party reputation simple two woman 165034

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (3/29/1999)

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210

accountant age blank cable channel computers general information information-age interactive internal internet losers man mask mick monitor revenue service stevens taxes television tv video virtual watches welding work workmen 165035

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

James Stevenson (4/5/1999)

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211

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Can we move our lunch up to noon? Ive got to


be at City Hall by two to be arrested.

Lee Lorenz (4/5/1999)

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212

amadou arrest campaign campaigning candidate civil cop cops crime diallo election enforcement executive government jail law new nypd office officer official phone platform police policeman policemen political politicians politics york 165037

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its the final four.

James Stevenson (4/5/1999)

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213

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

But that was long ago, before we dipped our bread in olive oil.

Leo Cullum (4/5/1999)

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214

another cuisine diner dining eat eating eats food foods language meals one restaurant restaurants service waiter waiters waitress waitresses 165039

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, definitely, I feel theres a reason I was given a second chance.

Charles Barsotti (4/5/1999)

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215

catch caught cliche cliches death expressions fish fishing hook host language life line mouth one play show talk talking word words 165040

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Three wishes less commission.

Edward Frascino (4/5/1999)

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216

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Maybe we should try visualization, Chief!

Edward Koren (4/5/1999)

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217

another cliche cliches expressions fdny fire fireman firemen language one out play psuedo psychology putting science visaualize visual word words 165042

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If you are still unhappy with your current allowance compensation,


may I once more suggest to you a life of crime.

Jack Ziegler (4/5/1999)

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218

advice angry boy children coins crime criminal criminals crook crooks disgruntled enraged father furious grumpy hand holding irate irritated little looking mad money mug mugger parents rob robber robbery thief thieves unhappiness unhappy upset 165043

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My name is Andrew, and I need a ride.

Danny Shanahan (4/5/1999)

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219

alcoholics anonymous car cars cliche cliches drive driving expressions group help introduction jargon language man medical meeting meetings others play support therapy word words 165044

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Leon, you are a millennial Odyssey.

George Booth (4/5/1999)

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220

chair contortions doing enigma journey language man millenium play quest relationships spiritual strange table woman word 165045

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bruce Eric Kaplan (4/5/1999)

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221

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, this isnt a book signing.

Frank Cotham (4/5/1999)

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222

authors bestseller book books death gates heaven incompetents literature man manuscript mistake mistakes pearly peter publishing writers writing 165047

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Theres been a change in plans.


Instead of Abilene, were going to Camelot.

Sam Gross (4/5/1999)

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223

ancient animals another armor arthur cattle horseback king knights mediaeval medieval one regional round steer table talking times west 165048

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

May I remind you that we can always go with duck eggs.

Mike Twohy (4/5/1999)

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224

alternative animals backup bunny business chicken contract easter hen holding holidays out rabbit signing supply talking 165049

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It would behoove you to remember that our passenger-side


airbag has been disconnected.

William Haefeli (4/5/1999)

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225

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Nick Downes (4/5/1999)

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226

all bumper channel decals logo man network over recliner sitting souvenir souvenirs sticker stickers surfing television tourism tourist travel traveler traveling tv vacation visit visited visitor watching 165051

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (4/5/1999)

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227

age apartment appliances chast couple discovers fashioned furniture gap havent heard leaves life lost man modern offer road roz snacks starbucks technology the things tribe use 165052

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oooh! I think I just felt our stock split.

Mick Stevens (4/12/1999)

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228

babies brokers cliche cliches expressions felt general kick language living man market play pregnancy reading room split stock stocks woman word words 165054

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good evening. In todays top story, my book has jumped


to Number Three on the best-seller list.

David Sipress (4/12/1999)

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229

anchors authors bestseller book books broadcast correspondent general hears journalism list literature man manuscript media news newscast newscaster press programming publishers publishing report reporter reporting sales television tv watching writers writing 165055

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Please join me in welcoming and inflating our newest vice-president.

Michael Maslin (4/12/1999)

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230

beach beaches bicycle board boss business businessmen chairmen collar corporate deflated employee employer employment enters executive executives hierarchy holding incompetents inflatables management meetings members occupation office profession professional pump pumps room swimming toys welcome white work 165056

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Theres no business deductions like show-business deductions.

Leo Cullum (4/12/1999)

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231

audit cinema cliche cliches deductions entertainment executives expressions filing film hollywood income internal irs language money motion movie movies picture plan play revenue service tax taxed taxes taxing theater their word words 165057

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gahan Wilson (4/12/1999)

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232

again all bulging bull cheek circus eat eating headless heads lets lion lions lions maul mauled out right ring roy siegfried spit tamer tamers tells tigers train trainer try whip within 165058

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mort Gerberg (4/12/1999)

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233

annuals basket centennials flowers garden gardening gardens -general greenhouse millennials millennium nurseries nursery perennials peruses plant saying seed shopping signs stores supply woman 165059

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Today, we will talk about your phony numbers. We will


not talk about the I.R.S. having too many cooks!

George Booth (4/12/1999)

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234

agent audit audited being chefs cooks government income incompetents internal irs man numbers phony revenue service talk tax taxed taxes taxing 165060

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im a Schedule D kind of guy with a little Schedule E thrown in.

Peter Steiner (4/12/1999)

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235

date dating general government language man money play relationship relationships restaurant restaurants taxes woman word 165061

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If anyone can balance a career with motherhood


and state-sponsored terrorism, its Jeannie.

Michael Crawford (4/12/1999)

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236

careers dressed executives family feminism general get man mothers parents parties state-sponsored terrorists woman 165062

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hello? Risotto-crisis hot line?

Liza Donnelly (4/12/1999)

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237

cooking food general hotline husband incompetents italian kitchen looks pasta phone pot risotto stove telephones woman 165063

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How is it gendered?

Edward Koren (4/12/1999)

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238

babies babys children city feminism gender gendered general hand holding kneeling language new play politics pushing scenes sex sexes street stroller talking woman word york 165064

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do you even know how long its been


since you last poked and prodded me?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (4/12/1999)

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239

animals cage cliche cliches complains doctors experiment expressions fights general lab language marital mice patients play rat relations relationship relationships research scientist scientists sex talking word words 165065

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Once more unto the breach, and thats it for me.

James Stevenson (4/12/1999)

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240

age armor army battle breech cliche cliches dark enter expressions fight fighting henry language literary medieval play prepare quit quitter quitting retire shakespeare thats times tired war warriors william word words 165066

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

PARK (1 of 4)

Artist

William Steig (4/12/1999)

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241

artist artists families family general landscape painting park parks scenes steig watches william wst 165067

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

PARK (2 of 4)

William Steig (4/12/1999)

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242

daughter daughters families father fathers general head house mother mothers park parks reptile reptiles scenes steig william wst zoos 165070

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

PARK (3 of 4)

Which thing do I press?

William Steig (4/12/1999)

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243

cameras couple incompetents park parks passerby photo photographers photographs press scenes steig takes william wst 165069

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

PARK (4 of 4)

Mysterious Man Who Feeds the Pigeons

William Steig (4/12/1999)

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244

bench benches birds dapper feeding ladies mysterious park parks pigeons scenes sitting steig two watched william wst 165068

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is everything boring enough for you, sir?

Lee Lorenz (4/12/1999)

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245

armchairs bore bored boredom boring butler class club clubs group groups meetings members men mens money opulence organizations people rich servant snoozing three upper waiter wealth wealthy 165071

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So soon? But weve barely scratched the surface of our discontent.

Robert Mankoff (4/12/1999)

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246

argue arguing argument both breakups cliche cliches discontent dispute divorce expressions fight fighting fights hands home language leaves leaving literary man marital marriage play problems quarrel quarreling relationships scratched shakespeare she soon suitcases surface wives woman word words 165072

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I see jury selection has begun.

Tom Cheney (4/12/1999)

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247

another begin beginning begun being cave caveman cavemen court courthouse courtroom dragged guilt guilty hair innocence innocent into judge judicial juries jury law lawyers legal one system trial watch witness yet 165073

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oprah is definite, Barnes & Noble is giving you front windows,


and Norman Mailer has agreed to a feud.

William Hamilton (4/12/1999)

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248

argue author authors bestseller book books bookstore business debate editor feud fight fighting host literature manuscript marketing new publicist publicity publishers publishing show stores talk television winfrey writers writing 165074

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say may be
used against you in a court of law, newspapers, periodicals, radio,
television, all electronic media, and technologies yet to be invented.

Arnie Levin (4/12/1999)

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249

arrest arrested broadcast computers correspondent exploit exploitation exploited handcuffed internet inventions journalism man media miranda news newscast newscaster police policeman press privacy programming reporter reporting rights science street technological technology television tv 165075

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lets focus on what we do besteating out.

Richard Cline (4/12/1999)

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250

awning best cafe eat fights focus food general man -marital marriage pass relationships restaurants street under woman 165053

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The Balkans. This is where I came in.

Peter Steiner (4/19/1999)

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251

age another bosnia club clubs first kosovo man mens mens nation nationality nations one war world yugoslavia 165076

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Robert Mankoff (4/19/1999)

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252

amadou behavior breaking button buttons city code cop cops courtesy diallo enforcement etiquette giuliani graces language law manners mayor new not nypd of officer police policeman policemen reading regional rude rudeness rudolph social thank wears york 165077

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youve got mail.

Tom Cheney (4/19/1999)

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253

age america another back caveman cavemen cliche cliches computers correspondence e-mail email expressions head hit internet language letter letters mail office one online play post postage postal postman rock rocks stone technology thrown word words 165078

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its part of a deal I worked out with the I.R.S.

Mick Stevens (4/19/1999)

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254

audit backyard deal government guy income internal irs mens next people pool property revenue rich says service shirt shirts tax taxed taxes taxing wearing 165079

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This isnt about you, Cheryl. In this crazy world your problems
dont amount to a hill of beans. This is about me.

Leo Cullum (4/19/1999)

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255

arrogance break-ups casablanca cliche cliches dating ego expressions fights general hill language love man marital movies play problem problems relationships restaurant restaurants scenes vanity woman word words 165080

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Why would He take someone so toned?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (4/19/1999)

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256

black burial cemeteries cemetery cliche cliches death expressions fitness funeral funerals god grave gravesite graveyard humor language lifters man mourning muscles play plot tomb tombstone toned wake weight woman word words 165081

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its been done, but I dont think its been redone.

Barbara Smaller (4/19/1999)

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257

advertising another cinema directors done entertainment executive film hollywood incompetents marketing media meetings motion movie movies one picture producers redone screen theater writers 165082

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes run away to join the media circus.

Robert Weber (4/19/1999)

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258

bed boys broadcast children circus correspondent discover family father general journalism left little media mother news newscast newscaster note parents press programming reporter reporting room television tv worried 165083

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I told my parents that if grades were so important they


should have paid for a smarter egg donor.

Donald Reilly (4/19/1999)

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259

another cards children donors egg families general genes girl grades important medical money one parents report school schools science teachers vitro 165084

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mrs. Ritterhouse is getting harmonic tones on her G-string.

George Booth (4/19/1999)

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260

age cello cliche cliches concert entertainment expressions g-string harmonic instrument language lingerie man music musical musician musicians people performance piano play playing poor relationships singing song underwear woman word words 165085

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I took him for what he was worth,


but it was all in utilities.

Richard Cline (4/19/1999)

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261

another brokers divorce down electric fashionable fuel market money one people power relationships rich shopping stock stocks street swank took utilities walk water woman 165086

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have you ever wondered what would happen if a


giant hair ball were to slam into the earth?

Frank Cotham (4/19/1999)

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262

alley animals another asteroids astronomy balls car cat cats comets earth full general hair looking meteors moon one talking top 165087

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My people will have sex with your people.

Peter Steiner (4/19/1999)

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263

another building businessmen cliche cliches deal executives expressions female general group hierarchy intercourse language large lobby male management meet meetings merge merger play relations relationship relationships sex sexual word words 165088

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Does it hurt when my attorney does this?

Danny Shanahan (4/19/1999)

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264

chest court doctor doctors general hurt law laws lawsuits lawyers legal malpractice patient patients poke sue sued suing 165089

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (4/19/1999)

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265

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Harry Bliss (4/19/1999)

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266

audit bible bliss catholic catholicism christ christian christianity commandments form forms glumly god harry income internal irs looks moses mount religion religious revenue say service sinai stone tablets tax taxed taxes taxing ten them which 165091

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats where we differ. Youd eat cat food, but I wouldnt touch dog food.

Sidney Harris (4/19/1999)

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267

animals cat cats counter cuisine differ dining dogs eat eating eats food foods insult insulting insults lunch meals restaurant restaurants sitting talking touch 165092

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You just dont understand the demands of the marketplace.

Leo Cullum (4/26/1999)

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268

carrying coming consumerism fights front home husband issue late lounging marital marketplace money packages relationships shopper shopping store stores tv wife wives 165093

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter C. Vey (4/26/1999)

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269

astronomy attention beyond celebration chopped cliche cliches day earth environment expressions image jealous jealousy language liver moon orbit play self shown thinking vey what word words 165094

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Whats your exit strategy?

James Stevenson (4/26/1999)

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270

break cell crime criminal criminals discussing escape exit jail kosovo men out plan plans prison prisoners strategy two yugoslavia 165095

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Of course, we can do spare and minimalist, but not on your budget.

Barbara Smaller (4/26/1999)

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271

advises architecture budget client decorate decorating decorators design designer furniture home house interior minimalist money rich spare style stylish 165096

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So many indie films, so little time.

Victoria Roberts (4/26/1999)

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272

cliche cliches entertainment expressions general independent indie language man many movies play rain scenes street time umbrella umbrellas under walking woman word words 165097

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, Im sorry, sir, my mistake. That sign was meant


for someone with a less expensive car.

Pat Byrnes (4/26/1999)

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273

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

For my next encore,


I would like to play another piece written specially for me.

Gahan Wilson (4/26/1999)

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274

arm arms casually concert deformity drapes encore hands keyboard music musicians mutant mutation over pianist pianists third tuxedo 165099

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Remember, you werent hired to thinkyou were


hired because you have opposable thumbs.

Charles Barsotti (4/26/1999)

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275

animals board boss business businessmen chairmen chews collar corporate dog dogs employee employer employers employment executives general getting hierarchy human management members occupation office opposable out profession professional talking think thumbs too uppity white work workers 165100

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K. Just make sure no animals are harmed


in the exploding-donkey scene.

Mick Stevens (4/26/1999)

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276

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

First, I storyboarded it.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (4/26/1999)

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277

advertising angels art artwork bible cloud direction director earth general god heaven human humans mankind movies one outline overlooking plan planning plans religilon stand storyboard storyboards 165102

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Miss Davis, bring me everything weve got on turning a two-bit


hole-in-the-wall operation into a multinational juggernaut.

Robert Mankoff (4/26/1999)

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278

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is Fluffy, my pet money.

Danny Shanahan (4/26/1999)

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279

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Are you starting to feel fabulous yet?

Harry Bliss (4/26/1999)

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280

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Remember how I said I was happiest when we had nothing?

Leo Cullum (4/26/1999)

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281

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Marisa Acocella (4/26/1999)

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282

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Steiner (4/26/1999)

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283

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If its the I.R.S., tell them: Not a penny! Not a centime! Not a sou!

George Booth (4/26/1999)

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284

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (4/26/1999)

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285

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I try to eat right, but huge chunks of raw meat


are all you can find these days.

Peter C. Vey (4/26/1999)

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286

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Cheer up, Nicole! What does Princeton know? Say, you


got any plans for that last bit of cobbler?

Michael Crawford (4/26/1999)

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287

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1999

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My daddys rich and my ma is good-lookin, but Im a mess.

Robert Weber (4/26/1999)

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288

bess busy children city down family fathers general girls good-lookin little lyrics mess mothers opera parents people play porgy problem problems relationships rich song street two walk word 165113

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Big Tonys Web siteget rid of it.

Peter Steiner (4/26/1999)

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289

around boss collar .com computers crime criminals death gang gangster gangsters general hit hitman hitmen internet kill meeting meetings mob mobster mobsters order ordered orders organized out rub sitdown sites sitting table technology web whack white wide wipe world www 165114

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We wanted a design that would reflect how much money we have.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (4/26/1999)

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290

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its just a correction. The fundamentals are still good.

Bernard Schoenbaum (4/26/1999)

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291

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I shall require many menservants.

Frank Cotham (4/26/1999)

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292

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Money makes me get out of bed, but business puts me to sleep.

Richard Cline (4/26/1999)

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293

bed brokers businessmen cafe coffee drinking general man market meetings sleep sleeping stock stocks woman 165118

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wunderkinder come and go, but old farts are forever.

Lee Lorenz (4/26/1999)

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294

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Maslin (4/26/1999)

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295

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

A lot of very smart grownups are working on the Year 2000


problem, Adam. You go on back to bed.

Tom Chalkley (4/26/1999)

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296

assuage bedtime boy bug children computers dad dreams family fear fears general grownups little millennium mom nightmares parents sleep smart stairs top try worries worry y2k 165207

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (4/26/1999)

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297

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You might want to review the chapter on unconditional love.

William Haefeli (4/26/1999)

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298

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Fortunately, you have the life savings of a man three times your age.

Mort Gerberg (4/26/1999)

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299

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Omigodthats your dirty little secret? That you have a trust fund?

William Hamilton (4/26/1999)

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300

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Any fruits or veggies?

Brian Savage (4/26/1999)

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301

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were ecstatic about our new au pair.

Edward Koren (4/26/1999)

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302

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And so the crack-whore princess and her pimp lived happily


ever after. The end. O.K., thats it. Lights out.

Jack Ziegler (4/26/1999)

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303

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (4/26/1999)

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304

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Forgive me, Eddie, if Im unable to contain the occasional squeal of


anticipatory glee over the new Star Wars movie.

Jack Ziegler (5/10/1999)

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305

bars bartender cinema cult entertainment fiction film general glee hollywood man motion movie movies picture science squeal squeals star theater wars 165129

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (5/10/1999)

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306

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

In a further effort to ingratiate herself with New Yorkers,


Hillary Clinton threw out the first pitch at last nights Yankee game
and went on to pitch three scoreless innings.

Robert Mankoff (5/10/1999)

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307

baseball couple day elections evening general ingratiate new news opening politician politicians politics regional report season senate senator sports television washington watches yankees york 165131

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive decided to stand by another man for a while.

J.P. Rini (5/10/1999)

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308

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I want to get married, but Ill be damned if


Im going to sell any Amazon stock to do it.

Richard Cline (5/10/1999)

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309

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Give me one more chance, Rachel.


Ill go straight, and quit my lawyerin ways.

Danny Shanahan (5/10/1999)

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310

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You know, Einstein never watched


any great television until after he was forty.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (5/10/1999)

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311

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its museum-store quality.

Barbara Smaller (5/10/1999)

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312

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

One thing about EarlEarl knows when to fold.

George Booth (5/10/1999)

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313

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You should have called me sooner.

Tom Cheney (5/10/1999)

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314

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Crawford (5/10/1999)

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315

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1999

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Special assignment, Chaswick. I need you to test our severance package.

John Caldwell (5/10/1999)

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316

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Marisa Acocella (5/10/1999)

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317

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (5/10/1999)

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318

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sex . . . sex . . .

Bernard Schoenbaum (5/10/1999)

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319

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tell the public we dont want to hurt anyone.


All we want is their money.

Frank Cotham (5/10/1999)

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320

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

They decided on separate weddings.

Peter Steiner (5/10/1999)

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321

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Mueller (5/10/1999)

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322

birth gardener gardeners gardening gardens general ground kneels movies next plot prequel prequels small spinach sprouts star stories story vegetable vegetables wars 165146

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Arnie Levin (5/10/1999)

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323

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sidney Harris (5/17/1999)

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324

alta booths central commuters computers designated desk engines grand information infoseek internet metacrawler names representatives search station stations technology train vista web wide world yahoo 165148

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (5/17/1999)

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325

american atom atomic atoms behind bomb china chinese counter eighties general government incompetents involving lunch menus military nineties nuclear other out passage peas reads restaurants scandal secrets sign snow special spiesrefers take technology todays washington weapons 165149

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And every time I start to get the least bit serious about a Republican
he turns out to be a Log Cabin Republican.

Michael Crawford (5/17/1999)

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326

central dating gay homosexual homosexuals interested jogging log man men one park party politics relationships running scenes sex shes three woman women 165150

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (5/17/1999)

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327

bathroom bathrooms convenience convenient crime efficiency efficient o parks police port port-o-san potty public urban 165151

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Obviously your cane is too long.

Eldon Dedini (5/17/1999)

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328

artists bowler canes dwarves fitness hat height henri lautrec man medical short small tall toulouse- 165152

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mort Gerberg (5/17/1999)

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329

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I mean, hell, sure, Superman is cute,


but Batman looks like hes got money.

William Hamilton (5/17/1999)

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330

attraction attractive cute digger general girls gold kitchen mom money people rich sex sexual shallow superficial superhero superheroes television two watches watching 165154

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Weve been wandering in the desert for forty years. But


hes a manwould he ever ask directions?

Peter Steiner (5/17/1999)

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331

another bible crowd directions discussing following gender general israelites lost male men moses one religion sexes woman women 165155

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, weve been a theme restaurant for about a month now.

Charles Barsotti (5/17/1999)

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332

animal businessmen cavemen customer fashion general loincloth only restaurants skin theme trends waiter waiters wearing 165156

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You and I havent had an in-house date in a long, long, long time!

George Booth (5/17/1999)

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333

affection armchair dates dating domestic elderly general glowering husband love marriage marry matrimony people poor problems relations relationships romance scenes sits social speaks woman 165157

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The trick is in shucking them out of their shells.

Gahan Wilson (5/17/1999)

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334

automobiles car cars creature creatures desert eat eating family fiction food foods general giant holds insect insects inside lobsters look monsters panicked reversal role science shellfish shells shuck shucking van young 165158

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Till death do us part? Hey, I thought this was


just supposed to be a starter marriage!

Jack Ziegler (5/17/1999)

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335

affection bride ceremonies ceremony death divorce domestic groom love marriage marry matrimony minister nuptial obstacles problems propose relations relationships romance starter wed wedding weddings 165159

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (5/17/1999)

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336

airline airplane airplanes cargo cowboys cows farmers flying general herding life livestock modern plane planes regional steers west 165160

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

A table in Siberia, please.

James Stevenson (5/17/1999)

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337

cliche cliches couple cuisine dining expectations expressions general high host language location low play restaurant restaurants seating service tables waiters word words 165161

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I may be a jackal-headed god of the underworld, Janet,


but Im also your lawyer.

Danny Shanahan (5/17/1999)

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338

anubis attorney attorneys business businessmen cliche cliches desk dogs egypt expressions general gods hell into jackal-headed language law lawyers legal mythology office play shouts sits suit telephone telephones word words 165162

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Stuart Leeds (5/17/1999)

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339

cab city company door feet general information lists measurements mile miles new reads sign taxi taxis useful york 165163

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Arnie Levin (5/17/1999)

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340

appears boxes four gag gags general gift gifts joke packages present presents removes reveal ribbon ribbons single small square trick what woman wrapping 165164

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im expensive, but there are rebates, if you look for them.

Victoria Roberts (5/17/1999)

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341

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (5/17/1999)

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342

alarmingly all along american ann anyway around astonishing beautiful betty big bone boss but can cannes chast check completely counter course de-luxe did diner disagreement dream dreams end even everyone except father festival film find france french general go gorgeous grungy had happy have huge hungry incredibly its just like little looks lugging lunch-time meal mind missed movies must never night not ones only order other our out parents people perfect pick place platter reason relaxed riviera roz servicelast she
showed sit some species still stipulation straightened strangest suitcases surrounded take them there theres these this though three tickets time trip tuna us vacations wait walking was were weve well whos wins woman won 165166

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And, in literary news, J. D. Salingers privacy has been violated


once again by his appearance in this cartoon.

Robert Mankoff (5/24/1999)

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343

authors bestseller book books cartoons evening literature man manuscript new news privacy publ publishing salinger story television watches writers writing yorker 165168

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Same old same old.

Lee Lorenz (5/24/1999)

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344

cinema cliche cliches commenting couple entertainment expressions film hollywood language motion movie movies picture play sci-fi screen theater word words 165187

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We dont need NATO. We need Tito.

J.B. Handelsman (5/24/1999)

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345

atlantic breakfast family five husband jackson kosovo marshal mediator music musician north organization paper problem problems reading table treaty trouble washington wife yugoslavia 165169

1999

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Arnie Levin (5/24/1999)

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346

acrobats artists because cellphone cellphones cellular circus connection incompetents miss one phone phones talking telephones them trapeze 165170

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I used to do it all myself, but now I have my lawyers handle it.

Mick Stevens (5/24/1999)

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347

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I feel we havent moved beyond parallel play.

Barbara Smaller (5/24/1999)

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348

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (5/24/1999)

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349

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I know these are things you dont want to hear,


but Im enjoying the hell out of saying them.

William Haefeli (5/24/1999)

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350

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gahan Wilson (5/24/1999)

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351

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I love you, Ilene, O.K.? Get over it!

Michael Crawford (5/24/1999)

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352

bar bars business cliche cliches dating expressions fights flirtations general glasses horn-rimmed language love man marital over pickups play relationships scenes suit woman word words 165176

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Pushing the envelope. How about you?

Peter Steiner (5/24/1999)

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353

another carrier carriers carts cliche cliches envelope expressions government language letter letters mail management office one outside play post postage postal postman push word words 165177

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Can I borrow those kittens for an hour?


I want to freak out the people who had me spayed.

Sam Gross (5/24/1999)

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354

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hate getting all these Canadian coins, but I


guess thats the price of living in Toronto.

Leo Cullum (5/24/1999)

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355

another beggar beggars bum bums canada cash coins cups dollar exchange finances financial hobo hobos homeless homelessness money one poor poverty rate regional sidewalk standing tin tramp tramps 165179

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If you want to buy this, Im afraid


Im going to need to see some justification.

Frank Cotham (5/24/1999)

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356

age automobiles buy car cars cause city cliche cliches customer dealer dealers expressions general huge insecurity justification justified justify language male men middle play psychology purchasing salesmen short showrooms sport station stores suv truck urban utility vehicle wagons word words 165180

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I have a spiritual side, but mostly Im an eating machine.

Charles Barsotti (5/24/1999)

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357

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Scientists have extended the life of the fruit fly.

George Booth (5/24/1999)

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358

age biology chair chromosomes dna doctors flies front fruit general genes geriatrics insects lifespan man nurse nurses porch rocking science sitting telomeres 165182

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mike Twohy (5/24/1999)

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359

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It was a good rotting carcass, but it wasnt a great rotting carcass.

Tom Cheney (5/24/1999)

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360

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its National Were History Month.

Victoria Roberts (5/24/1999)

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361

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just try to get one to answer a riddle


after hes won your hand in marriage.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (5/24/1999)

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362

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

To be completely frank, we have now discovered all


your countrys secrets, except how to make a million dollars in
ones spare time at home with no personal investment.

James Stevenson (5/31/1999)

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363

business china chinese diplomat get government information intelligence nation national politics quick rich secret secrets security spare spies spy spying talking time work 165189

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (5/31/1999)

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364

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (5/31/1999)

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365

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I am the Lady of the Lake, and because thou hast defiled my crystal
waters I must hence smite thee. That or penalize thee a stroke. Your call.

Pat Byrnes (5/31/1999)

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366

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

An olive or a twist?

Nick Downes (5/31/1999)

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367

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We didnt have time to pick up a bottle of wine,


but this is what we would have spent.

Mike Twohy (5/31/1999)

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368

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Right now Im between drinks.

Danny Shanahan (5/31/1999)

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369

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

All Im getting out of him is a lot of profanity.

Frank Cotham (5/31/1999)

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370

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yeah, Im alone.

Charles Barsotti (5/31/1999)

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371

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How do we tell the kids that were edible again?

Donald Reilly (5/31/1999)

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372

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Joseph Farris (5/31/1999)

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373

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have some respect for my learning style.

Barbara Smaller (5/31/1999)

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374

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You have a serious illness of an undisclosed nature.

Leo Cullum (5/31/1999)

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375

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Boy, Id love to meet you sometime off leash.

Mort Gerberg (5/31/1999)

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376

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Id like to take a moment to define what I mean by defining moment.

David Sipress (5/31/1999)

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377

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, actually, they are written in stone.

Harry Bliss (5/31/1999)

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378

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (5/31/1999)

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379

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (5/31/1999)

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380

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sam Gross (6/7/1999)

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381

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (6/7/1999)

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382

books brokers coming down economy entitled future god hefty lighting market pamphlets recession stock stocks throws zeus 165209

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hard to tell from here. Could be buzzards. Could be grief counsellors.

Tom Cheney (6/7/1999)

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383

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would you explain to your son that theres no free agency in T-ball?

Harry Bliss (6/7/1999)

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384

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What ever happened to Never go to bed angry?

Victoria Roberts (6/7/1999)

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385

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Therell be a slight delay. The chef s been attacked by a blue jay.

Charles Barsotti (6/7/1999)

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386

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lee Lorenz (6/7/1999)

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387

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Who does your water?

Richard Cline (6/7/1999)

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388

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I know, and its not just memy whole family has


been smug for hundreds of years.

William Hamilton (6/7/1999)

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389

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats not you talking, Justin, thats the sugar talking.

Barbara Smaller (6/7/1999)

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390

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (6/7/1999)

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391

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Over there, over there . . .

Robert Weber (6/7/1999)

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392

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Porges (6/7/1999)

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393

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Beuford was too old for a sexual frenzy.

George Booth (6/7/1999)

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394

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It was right here in this park, Jamie, that I was inspired to become
an attorney, when Vinnie Maroney beat me to a pulp.

Leo Cullum (6/7/1999)

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395

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Whos that trip-tripping, woefully underinsured, over my bridge?

Danny Shanahan (6/7/1999)

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396

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

To hell with you, too.

Frank Cotham (6/7/1999)

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397

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

In the old days, we werent old.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (6/7/1999)

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398

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im a gladiator, but thats just to put food on the table.


What I really want to do is teach.

Michael Maslin (6/7/1999)

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399

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter C. Vey (6/7/1999)

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400

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I was a dog in a previous life, but I came back as a god.

Mike Twohy (6/7/1999)

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401

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (6/7/1999)

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402

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wants watch way what wish woman women wore worked years zip-locked 165229

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You know, if she werent part of a well-regulated


militia Id be a little nervous.

Robert Mankoff (6/14/1999)

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403

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

A lot of you used to know us as the L.A. Punksters.


Then for a while we were the Rappin Rapmen.
Now we call ourselves Los Latinos del Momento.

Jack Ziegler (6/14/1999)

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404

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Forget about mesave Social Security.

Robert Weber (6/14/1999)

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405

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mothers ninety-one and still depreciating.

William Hamilton (6/14/1999)

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406

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes very well off. Hes got all the quantities I admire.

Frank Cotham (6/14/1999)

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407

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Al Ross (6/14/1999)

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408

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, hes cute, all right, but hes got the temperament of a car alarm.

Barbara Smaller (6/14/1999)

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409

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (6/14/1999)

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410

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Memo to self: Feathers?

Danny Shanahan (6/14/1999)

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411

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It says, All photographic-reproduction rights


reserved by National Geographic Society.

Donald Reilly (6/14/1999)

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412

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Matthew Diffee (6/14/1999)

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413

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Todd has been an eager participant in our sex-education program.

Robert Weber (6/14/1999)

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414

children classroom eager education elementary general parents pupil reproduction safe safety school schoolroom schools sex sex-ed sexual son student students teach teacher teachers teaching their 165241

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I came, I bought, I subdivided.

Michael Maslin (6/14/1999)

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415

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wow! Whose idea was the cheese log?

Peter Steiner (6/14/1999)

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416

animals beavers cheese cliche cliches cuisine cutting dam down eat eating eats expressions food foods general language log meals play talking three trees wild word words 165243

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Darling, you never let me see the side of you that pays.

Mike Twohy (6/14/1999)

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417

bill bills card check checks cliche cliches credit dates dates dating dinner expressions general gesture language money pay pays play reaches relationships restaurant restaurants side social woman word words 165244

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

In reply to your inquiry regarding the Burke garden hoe, please visit our
Worldwide Web home page at: http://www.burke1903.com.

George Booth (6/14/1999)

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418

ancient computers corncob dogs gardening granny hicks hillbillies hillbilly hoes internet letter letters mailbox mule old pipe reads rural seven smoking sunbonnet technology toddler watch website websites www 165245

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I think Ive acquired some wisdom over the years, but there
doesnt seem to be much demand for it.

J.B. Handelsman (6/14/1999)

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419

age aging citizen citizens club clubs demand elderly knowledge man mens need old senior supply wisdom wise younger 165246

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gee, Al, two thousand dollars doesnt buy much


of a sex change these days, does it?

Jack Ziegler (6/14/1999)

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420

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, for heavens sake, dont feel that you have to entertain us, too.

Charles Barsotti (6/14/1999)

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421

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Somehow or other he keeps spotting us!

Gahan Wilson (6/14/1999)

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422

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (6/14/1999)

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423

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Frank Cotham (6/14/1999)

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424

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats Stanley. Stanley once saw Beatrix Potter naked.

Sam Gross (6/21/1999)

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425

animals bunnies bunny character children clothed forest hedgehog hedgehogs jumper naked nude nudity other people rabbit rabbits reading stories story writers 165252

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Perhaps we should provide for the separation


of state and entertainment.

Frank Cotham (6/21/1999)

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426

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is there a doctor of literature in the house?

Michael Maslin (6/21/1999)

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427

actor actress asks audience broadway cliche cliches director doctor doctors english entertainment expert expressions general help language literature performers play plays script stage theater theatre word words writers 165254

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Cheney (6/21/1999)

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428

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

How much longer on your visionary gnocchi, Stefano?

Michael Crawford (6/21/1999)

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429

art artist artistic artwork bake bakery baking chef chefs cook cooking cuisine culinary food general gnocchi high italian kitchen pasta preparing restaurant restaurants three visionary 165256

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, Ill be darned. Theres a really nice hardwood floor under here.

Peter Mueller (6/21/1999)

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430

cliche cliches digging expressions floors flowers gardening gardens general grass hardwood holding incompetents into language lawn man plant planting play potted shovel woman word words yard 165257

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Why is it that every time I say something in


quotation marks you respond in italics?

William Haefeli (6/21/1999)

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431

annoyed cafe fights general gesture italics language looking makes man marital marks play punctuation quotation relationships restaurants speaking while woman word writing 165258

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (6/21/1999)

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432

books bookstore bookstores boxes features filled incomplete library literary manuscripts notebooks progress section titled unfinished works writers 165259

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Congratulations! Your manuscript was the one-millionth


personal memoir submitted to us this year.

David Sipress (6/21/1999)

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433

apartment authors bestseller biography book books building letters literature mailboxes man manuscript memoirs millionth one publishers publishing rejection win winner woman won writers writing 165260

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I think theyll be perfect together.


Hes a journalist and shes a complete composite.

William Hamilton (6/21/1999)

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434

bathrobe cards composite correspondent date dating dining dinner head introductions journalism journalist language match matchmaker media news parties people place play press relationships reporter reporting rich room sets table towel woman word writers 165261

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You couldnt put on a tie?

Pat Byrnes (6/21/1999)

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435

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Truly a magnificent emperor! While Rome burns, Nero plays


an instrument that hasnt been invented yet.

J.B. Handelsman (6/21/1999)

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436

ancient another book books concert emperor empire entertainment flames goies history instrument invention inventions literature music musical musician one performance roman romans rome singing song toga violin violins 165263

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I feel that I have at least one more unpublished novel in me.

Jack Ziegler (6/21/1999)

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437

affection authors bestseller book books computer domestic doorway general husbands leaning literature love man manuscript marriage married matrimony novels older publishers publishing relations relationships romance unpublished wife writers writing 165264

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Christopher Weyant (6/21/1999)

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438

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thanks for almost everything, Dad.

Danny Shanahan (6/21/1999)

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439

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mr. Goodrich, its time we called each other by our first names.

George Booth (6/21/1999)

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440

age bed bedroom beside dog dogs elderly fedora five general jumping man names number numbers relationships rollers scenes sex shirt together woman 165267

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What would you boys think if we started selling books?

Peter Steiner (6/21/1999)

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441

and authors bar barnes barroom bars bartender bedraggled beer bestseller book books bookstores booze drinking fad general group house incompetents literature manuscript noble problems pub public publishing regulars stores tavern think tramps trend writers writing 165268

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What am I supposed to say when my friends ask


why youre still a mid-list author?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (6/21/1999)

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442

authors best-seller bestseller book books daughter failure general incompetents insecurity lists literature living manuscript mid-list mother mothers peer peers pressure problems publishing room say social writers writing 165269

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (6/21/1999)

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443

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sidney Harris (6/21/1999)

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444

books captionless characters childrens clothes clothesline clothing dry fictional giant hangs huge laundry line lived nursery out rhymes shoe sock socks woman 165271

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do you have Intelligence for Idiots?

Robert Mankoff (6/21/1999)

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445

authors bestseller book books bookstore bookstores brains clerk counter dumb-looking dummies dummiesrefers guy hopefully how-to idiots intellect intelligence literature manuscript publishing series simplified smart writers writing 165272

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your book is a masterpiece, but, unfortunately, were rather picky.

Robert Weber (6/21/1999)

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446

arrogant author authors bestseller book books choosey discusses editor general literature manuscript masterpiece picky pretentious publishers publishing rejection rejections writers writing 165273

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Weve always admired those literate prayers of yours, and its our hope
that youll keep them coming even though youre dead.

J.B. Handelsman (6/21/1999)

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447

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Here it isthe plain, unvarnished truth. Varnish it.

Richard Cline (6/21/1999)

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448

advertising another board boss business businessmen chairmen cliche cliches collar corporate cover-up employee employer employment ethics executive executives expressions general honest honesty language lawyers management members occupation office one play profession professional public relations spin truth white word words work 165275

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So thats how hes able to crank the stuff out.

Sam Gross (6/21/1999)

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449

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is there anyone else in bookkeeping who would like


one last picture with Mr. Pinkston?

Frank Cotham (6/21/1999)

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450

accountants accounting board body boss burial business businessmen camera casket cemetery chairmen collar corporate dead death employee employees employer employment executives funeral funerals general grave graveyard members mourning occupation office one photo photograph photographer photographers photographs photography picture pictures plot profession professional snapshot taking tomb tombstone upright wake white work 165277

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And Id recommend this book to anyone


in the market for a free plush toy.

Danny Shanahan (6/21/1999)

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451

books class classroom education elementary general girl pupil reads rebate report school schoolroom schools student students teach teachers teaching toys 165282

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You may rush in.

Leo Cullum (6/21/1999)

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452

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is gonna hurt like hell.

Harry Bliss (6/21/1999)

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453

afraid boy brutal children cliche cliches crying doctor doctors expressions fear fitness general honesty huge hurt hypodermic language looking medical mother needle needles pain painful patients play small standing word words worried 165279

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I thought that sperm-bank donors remained anonymous.

Nick Downes (6/21/1999)

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454

anonymous bank banks banner behind chair children copy cringes crowd dad day easy family father fathers general happy holding husband looks out parent parenthood parents people relationships says signs sperm time window woman 165280

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Not that it really matters, but how will this play out among the serfs?

James Stevenson (6/21/1999)

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455

advisor days government highness king lackey majesty matters mediaeval medieval monarch monarchy olden out peasants play poor problems regal rich royal royalty ruler serfs sire slave slaves 165281

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, yeah. Sorry. Never mind.

David Sipress (7/5/1999)

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456

armed backs bible break-in commandments crime criminal criminals crook gun hold holdups mind mug mugger mugging off presents rob robber robbery stone tablets ten thief thieves up victim when 165286

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward Frascino (7/5/1999)

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457

bananas concession disneys drugs food general movie movies muscle muscles offers popcorn showing stand steroids tarzan theatre walt 165287

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Fortunately, I think we have an extremely accurate


copy of it in the museums gift shop.

Gahan Wilson (7/5/1999)

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458

accidents art broken copy director fake furniture general gift guard incompetents museum museums over replica security shops stands vase 165288

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im thinking of doing Pamplona this year.

Arnie Levin (7/5/1999)

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459

animals bull bulls does exercise exercises fence fitness hamstring marathon preparation regional running spain sports stretch talking 165289

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Donald Reilly (7/5/1999)

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460

buzz chamber cliche cliches commerce expressions general language outside play public reads relations sign signs word words 165290

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., so who gets to tell him hes a war criminal?

Tom Cheney (7/5/1999)

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461

age behind bones cave cavemen convention crime crimes criminal criminals evil-looking geneva hide human man men milosevic rock sharpens slobodan spears stick stone surrounded war yugoslavia 165291

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (7/5/1999)

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462

albert brain brains comparison concepts differences different einstein einsteins epiphanies food foods insights intelligence mathematical medical new normal out places pointing recent refers scientists sections shows structure study typical 165292

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I see myself going into some form of public service, like banking.

Robert Weber (7/5/1999)

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463

accounts bank banking banks bathing beach beaches careers deposits finance finances general jargon man money officer people public rich savings service suit swimming teller woman young 165293

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its eBay feverwell have to pull the plug!

Lee Lorenz (7/5/1999)

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464

addict addicted addiction auction bid bidding business children computer computers consumerism electronic family general internet kids man monitor parents piles sale sales sell selling shopping stuff surrounded 165294

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gee, I had no idea you were married to a supermodel.

Michael Maslin (7/5/1999)

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465

another backyard children doorway drawing figure fitness idea man marriage model modeling models one people relationships rich skinny stick supermodel supermodels thin waif weight woman 165295

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I believe weve entered the dark underbelly of pet ownership.

Frank Cotham (7/5/1999)

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466

age around cliche cliches dark expressions fights general husband language marital master middle neck owner ownership pets play relationships sitting snake snakes wife word words wrapped 165296

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I always end up being attracted to the ones


who wear cheap insect repellent.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (7/5/1999)

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467

another attraction attractive bite bug bugs camp camper camping camps chase children cliche cliches date dating expressions flirt flirting girl hit hitting insecticide insects language little mens on one outside perfume pesticide play pretentious relationships stand summer tents word words 165297

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im bored. When do we get to kill the ump?

Ed Fisher (7/5/1999)

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468

ancient baseball boredom coliseum death emperor entertainment game games general gladiator gladiators good looks murder play primitive roman rome shields spears sport sports tritons version 165298

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Danny Shanahan (7/5/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

469

age airplanes airports arrivals babies baby birth born cliche cliches death deceased departures expressions hospital hospitals images language maternity monitors newly play room show waiting wards word words 165299

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your father and I have decided to give half your allowance to BAM.

Victoria Roberts (7/5/1999)

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470

academy allowance brooklyn child children daughter dinner families family money mother music parent parenting parents people rearing regional rich table young 165300

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Actually, Monkey see, monkey do has


served me quite well in this market.

Leo Cullum (7/5/1999)

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471

animals bear behind board bonds boss brokers bull business businessmen chairmen cliche cliches collar corporate desk do dollar economy employee employer employment executive executives expressions finance general human investments language market members money monkey monkeys nyse occupation office play profession professional proverbs stock stocks street talking wall white word words work 165301

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I got the part, but I play a waiter.

Mick Stevens (7/5/1999)

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472

actor actors actress another broadway cinema entertainment film general hollywood kitchen motion movie movies one part performers picture play plays restaurant restaurants service theater theatre waiters 165302

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The dog ate my magnetic insoles.

George Booth (7/5/1999)

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473

animals best big canines dog dogs doggie dogs food foods friend general haired husband insoles kitchen magnet magnetic magnets man's master metal owner owners pet pets pooch problem problems puppies puppy rear refrigerator refrigerators shoes sticking table woman 165303

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sam Gross (7/5/1999)

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474

around beggar beggars challenged crime cup disabled exposed fake fraud front handicapped impostor man neck panhandler panhandling phony physically poor sign standing tin wearing wheelchair wheelchairs 165304

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry, but I dont do stitches anymore. All stitches are now


handled by Local 405 over at Bellevue.

Jack Ziegler (7/12/1999)

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475

american association boy bureaucracy crying doctor doctors doctors ethics examining hospital labor little medical mother office patients stitches table union unionized unions 165305

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Crawford (7/12/1999)

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476

city direction exit freeway giuliani inexplicably mayor new overhanging rage reading response reverse road rudolph rudys running scenes sidewalk sidewalks sign signs speed stop street style veer walk walkers walking york 165306

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (7/12/1999)

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477

acres architecture called cancer color community development estate general melonin modern palm real shaded signs skin spanish suburban sun sunbathing suntan tan tanned tanning tans vista 165307

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Maybe if we put stone statues in their place,


no one will notice that theyve flown away.

Gahan Wilson (7/12/1999)

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478

buildings courtiers fly gargoyles general medieval medieval renaissance plan sitting statues times what 165308

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I cant help thinking of the lyrics to that old song: I want to sex you up.

Pat Byrnes (7/12/1999)

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479

blanket entertainment general hint hinting hints i inuendo love man music musical musician picnic picnics relationships scenes sex sexual singing song songs woman 165309

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes dead. Would you like his voice mail?

David Sipress (7/12/1999)

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480

answering bussiness cliche cliches death executives expressions language machines mail office play receptionist receptionists technology telephones visitor voice word words work workers 165310

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Id love to ask you in, Howard, but they start


trading in Hong Kong in ten minutes.

Lee Lorenz (7/12/1999)

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481

apartment bear beautiful bonds brokers bull computers date dates dating dollar door economy finance girlfriend goodnight hang internet investments man market money nyse ready regional relationships says seng she social stock stocks street wall young 165311

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Consider yourself chased.

Charles Barsotti (7/12/1999)

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482

animals blazing chase chased chasing cliche cliches dog dogs expressions general hot language obstacles play problems run running squirrel squirrels summer sun talking tired under word words 165312

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Look, there is no right and wrong here, but Im going


to side with Helen because Im a girl.

Robert Mankoff (7/12/1999)

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483

bias biased counseling counselors counselors couple ethics favoritism female feminism fights gender general girl language marital marriage office problems right women wrong 165313

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mort Gerberg (7/12/1999)

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484

access accounts am another bank banking banks bear beggar beggars bonds brokers bull bum bums but captionless cup deposits dollar economy exercised finance finances for hat hobo hobos holds homeless homelessness investments man market money months my nyse officer options out passersby people poor poverty rich savings saying sign stock stocks street teller tin tramp tramps unable wall wealth wears 165314

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont sweat it. Thats Little Leagueyour dad comes, you choke.

Michael Crawford (7/12/1999)

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485

background baseball bat behind catcher child children choke comfort father fathers fence large looms opposite parent parenting player rearing sports sweat team tiny tries whose 165315

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just where Dad said it would be.

Donald Reilly (7/12/1999)

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486

american beatniks climbers dump fathers graffiti graffitti hippies history johnson ledge looking man mountain off pigs rock saying sons standing trends woman 165316

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well done lulled him into complacency.

George Booth (7/12/1999)

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487

boys burger burns chair complacency cook cooking cooks counter done exhausted fan frantically good griddle hamburgers incompetents lunch ol overhead service sleep slumps two well while whirrs 165317

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Christopher Weyant (7/12/1999)

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488

automobiles captionless car cone crushed drops environment falling general huge landscape landscapes national nature outdoor outdoors park pine redwood sequoia trees 165318

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Somethings wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to


the kitchen and have it genetically modified.

J.B. Handelsman (7/12/1999)

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489

broccoli cooking dining dna eat eating food foods general genetically kitchens man meal meals restaurant restaurants science something synthetic technology vegetable vegetables waiters waitress 165319

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

His underwear was spotless.

Danny Shanahan (7/12/1999)

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490

burial cemetery chores cliche cliches clothes clothing comforts crying death doctors emergency expressions funeral grave graveyard handkerchief hospitals household into language laundry mom mother mourning patients play plot room rooms saying spotless surgeon tomb tombstone underwear waiting wake widows woman word words 165320

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hope you realize that Im the one who has to write


about this stupid vacation next fall.

Peter Steiner (7/12/1999)

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491

arrogance automobiles back boring car children classroom did during education essay general journey kid parents pouts pupil report school schoolroom schools seat student students summer teach teachers teaching trip vacation vacations what writers writing 165321

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So what if he doesnt know Ovid. He knows Ovitz.

Marisa Acocella (7/12/1999)

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492

another attraction attractive bar bars celebrities chase cocktail date dating flirt flirting general hit hitting know knows men michael on one parties pretentious relationships sex sexual woman women 165322

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When I look at you, I see more than just a catI see the rewards
of a conscientiously applied program of dental hygiene.

Michael Maslin (7/12/1999)

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493

alice books cat cats cheshire childrens dentists during fitness general teeth toothbrush walk wonderland woods 165323

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He doesnt have to worry about his preschool placement


he interviews well.

Barbara Smaller (7/12/1999)

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494

child children classroom cliche cliches education employment expressions interview interviews jobs language nearby one personality placement play playing preschool pupil sandbox school schoolroom second student students teach teachers teaching tests third word words worry 165324

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im afraid youll never know if this was for


the speeding or for the Celine Dion tape, sir.

J.C. Duffy (7/12/1999)

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495

autos car celebrities concert cop cops duffy enforcement entertainment instrument know law man music musical musician nypd officer performance police policeman policemen singing song speed summons taste ticket traffic violation violations 165325

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is perfect. I could stay like this for the next five seconds.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (7/12/1999)

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496

beach beaches chairs cliche cliches closed couple expressions eyes language leisure lounge next perfect play seashore sitting sun sunning suntan swimming tan tanning time word words 165326

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jason, Id like to let you play, but soccer is a girls game.

Christopher Weyant (7/19/1999)

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497

boy cup games gender girl girls girls little olympic olympics play sex sexes sexism sexist soccer sports team uniform women world 165327

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (7/19/1999)

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498

bush campaign campaigning candidate checks civil desk election explanation funding funds george gov government hypnosis logic logical man money now official only phone platform political politicians politics sitting telephones washington 165328

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its supposed to be some kind of aphrodisiac,


but it hasnt done jack for me.

Mick Stevens (7/19/1999)

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499

animals aphrodisiac attraction female horns horny jack male relationships rhinoceros sex sexual talking wild 165329

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Very scary, Jenniferdoes anyone else have an H.M.O. horror story?

Nick Downes (7/19/1999)

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500

around bureaucracy camp campers campfire camping camps childrens cliche cliches coverage doctors expressions gather ghost ghosts health healthcare insurance language leader maintenance medical organization patients play stories summer telling word words 165330

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Paul Karasik (7/19/1999)

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501

afterlife angel angels consumerism death event events game games gates halo heaven line pearly people scalp scalper scalpers scalping sell sport sporting sports them tickets try waiting wings 165331

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would you like to meet Kate? Shes an acceptable risk.

Edward Koren (7/19/1999)

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502

acceptable age another cliche cliches cocktail dating events expressions gatherings introductions language leisure man middle middle-aged mingling nearby one outdoor parties party play relationships risk social socializing standing woman women word words 165332

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I tried victimless crime, but Im a people person.

Leo Cullum (7/19/1999)

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503

another bar cliche cliches crime criminal criminals crook expressions hold holdups language mug mugger mugging murder murderer one people play rob robber robbery thief thieves up victimless victims white-collar word words 165333

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This rsum appears to cover only the last forty-five minutes.

David Sipress (7/19/1999)

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504

applicant board boss business chairmen collar corporate employee employer employment executives history interview job manager members minutes occupation office offices personnel profession professional rsum white work 165334

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Only I can prevent forest fires? Dont you think


you should share some of the responsibility?

Michael Maslin (7/19/1999)

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505

animals bear bears can cliche cliches domestic ego expressions female fights fires forest language living marital marriage married matrimony play prevent relationships responsibilities responsibility room smokey talking vanity word words 165335

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its happened, Marge. Howard has the bomb.

Robert Weber (7/19/1999)

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506

atomic back bomb cliche cliches destruction expressions fights fuse general happen happened high homemade huddles husband husbands incompetents language lights marital mass next play relationships rocket technology telephone telephones their two-story weapons window woman word words yard 165336

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I suppose it was very sweet and old-fashioned


of him, but, still, it was syphilis.

Danny Shanahan (7/19/1999)

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507

affairs couch disease diseases drinking love old-fashioned older relationships sex sexual sexually std sweet syphilis tea coffee transmitted vd venereal woman women younger 165337

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I have a food question.

Michael Crawford (7/19/1999)

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508

business businessmen cuisine dining eat eating eats food foods general language meals men one questions restaurant restaurants service talking three waiter waiters waitress waitresses 165338

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You bludgeoned your cell mate during chapel services, Rhineschreiber!


Shame on you!

George Booth (7/19/1999)

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509

abashed bludgeon bludgeoned brought brutal-looking catholic catholicism cell chains christ christian christianity church churches clergy convict correctional crime criminals escape facility general guards incarcerate incarcerated incarceration into jail nun nuns office pray prayer priest priests prison prisoners rabbi rabbis religion religious reverend violence wardens 165339

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Eight years of unprecedented expansion,


and yet the kid sector has failed to participate.

Lee Lorenz (7/19/1999)

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510

allowance boys children cliche cliches confront economics economy expansion expressions father fathers language money people play rich three trickle-down wealthy word words 165340

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey, great ab!

Peter Steiner (7/19/1999)

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511

abdomen abdominal abs age aged beach beaches cliche cliches exercise expressions fat fitness language men middle muscles pack people play six swim swimming trends trunks two word words 165341

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (7/19/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

512

at beach beaches cliche cliches cut expressions hair hairdo hairstyle language like mans miniature people play rides surf surfer surfers surfing swimming wave word words 165342

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, I was looking for something with a little more hay.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (7/19/1999)

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513

animals apartment apartments barns building disappointed estate flat food hay home homes horse horses house look looking new real realtor realty rent restaurants stall talking 165343

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (7/19/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

514

depressed depression downs effects fun games ladders life lives living misery morose sad sadness slide slides toy toys trials tribulations unhappiness unhappy ups upset 174456

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

First beach?

Danny Shanahan (7/26/1999)

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515

beach beaches boy campfires children fire general girl incompetents little marshmallow marshmallows ocean pail roast roasting sand sea seashore shovel stick swimming vacation virgin water 165344

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont get me wrong. I think the morning-after


pill is great. Its just that right now my problem
is lining up something for the night before.

Marisa Acocella (7/26/1999)

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516

abortion another birth cocktail control date dates dating intercourse medicine mifepristone morning-after one parties party preganancy ru-486 sex sexual social woman women 165345

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

517

bar barroom bars bartender beer booze cliche cliches critics drinking drunks expressions general hangover hangovers house language liquor man passes play pub public restaurants reviews saloon side sign tavern theatre west what window word words wow 165346

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I love these quiet evenings at home battling alcoholism.

Peter C. Vey (7/26/1999)

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518

alcohol alcoholic alcoholism couch drink drinking drunk empty fitness general glasses holding inebriated intoxicated liquor love man medical not places public scenes wine woman 165347

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (7/26/1999)

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519

age bus busses class commute commuter general give handicapped influential man mass money more opulence people please rail railroad reads rich riding seat sees sign signs someone subway subways this train trains transit transportation travel upper wealth wealthier wealthy wont 165348

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I put the bird to bedlets party!

Victoria Roberts (7/26/1999)

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520

birdcages birds boy boys child childhood children cliche cliches dancing expressions fun general girl girls kid kids language little living man marriage parties pet pets play room sex woman word words young youth 165349

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Two lousy weeks. You people can surely make do for two lousy weeks.

Charles Barsotti (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

521

apartment beach beaches building buildings cell cellular cliche cliches cool drink executives expressions factories general language lousy phone play portable sips swimming talks telephones vacations word words 165350

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were thinking of moving to another part of the country


somewhere between Lyme disease and killer bees.

William Haefeli (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

522

bees estate gardeners gardening gardens general hedge insects moving over real talking ticks while women 165351

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Whom should I say is calling?

Sam Gross (7/26/1999)

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523

animal animals bird birds call calling cat cats cliche cliches doormen expressions general hole language mice mouse near office pet pets play receptionists stand telephones wall word words workers 165352

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good news. The test results show its a metaphor.

Leo Cullum (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

524

back betray betrayal betrayed businessmen cliche cliches doctor doctors doctors examination executives expressions fitness general get health knife language m.d. man medical metaphors nurse office patients physician play soon stab stabbing tests well word words 165353

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Harry Bliss (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

525

blanket estate farmers few garage general items junk man next outside owns people poor reads sale sales shack sign signs what whit yard 165354

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I may run, but first I want to toy with the electorate for a while.

Peter Steiner (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

526

being campaign campaigning campaigns candidate civil college election ethics government interviewed media news official platform political politicians politics polls show talk television votes washington 165355

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Christopher Weyant (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

527

acrobats amusment boardwalk booth circuses city cliche cliches coney count expressions fertile fertility freaks guess island language level levels new parks play reads sideshows sign sperm tent weight word words york 165356

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

All outdoor carpeting can be indoor carpeting, but not


all indoor carpeting can be outdoor carpeting.

Michael Maslin (7/26/1999)

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528

apartments carpet carpeting eastern furniture general guru gurus holy indoor language man men mountain outdoor religions top visits wisdom wise 165357

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gahan Wilson (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

529

burial business call captionless cemetery cliche cliches cobweb cop cops death detective enforcement enter expressions filled general grave graveyard hold important incompetents language law man nypd office officer play plot police policeman policemen remains skeletal skeletons technology telephones tomb tombstone us word words 165358

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I really dont see how giving you a six-letter word for a


sixteenth-century crested metal helmet helps my problem.

J.C. Duffy (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

530

crossword does duffy games medieval morion patient problem problems psychiatrists psychoanalyst psychologists puzzle puzzles session times while 165359

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its the co-op board!

Nick Downes (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

531

angry apartment apartments board building co-op dr estate flat frankenstein home homes house igor lynch mob monster monsters outside real rent 165360

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Arnie Levin (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

532

board business corporate cubicles employees employment form game games general o occupation office offices profession professional s symbol symbolic symbols tac tic toe work x 165361

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I wish youd stop trying to gross everybody out.

Frank Cotham (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

533

age another cave cavemen childishness dinosaurs disgust disgusting eat eaten eating eats food foods general gross man mouth opening play playing show stone them two 165362

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yall look like dog people to me.

Danny Shanahan (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

534

abducted abduction alien aliens animals being best canines cat cats creatures dog doggie dogs examining feline felines fiction friend general looked man's outer people pet pets pooch puppies puppy science space table talking travel 165363

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Stop calling! Well get there when we get there!

Lee Lorenz (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

535

automobiles back cellphone cellphones cellular child children general parents phone seat sport sport-utility station talk technology telephones travel traveling utility vacations vehicle vehicles wagons 165364

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

536

action blankly books bored boredom boring chast cliche cliches comic comics dwell expressions field fret heads language mull no-action obsess open over people play ponder refers roz shows six staring stew superman their these word words zing 165365

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just for kicks, Leon, lets shut down the F.B.I. again.

George Booth (7/26/1999)

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537

attacks attempting baseball beat beatniks bureau cap computer computers federal generation government hacker head hippies house internet investigation kicks kitchen problems recent refers sites stand successful table washington web white wide woman world 165366

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You should find solace in the fact that he left


behind such a large body of nuts.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

538

another artists burial cash cemetery composers death dollar exchange finances financial funeral general grave graveyard inheritance money mourning nuts one people plot rate rich solace songwriters squirrel squirrels tomb tombstone wake wills writers 165367

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (7/26/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

539

affairs air antigravity astronaut bedroom brush but earth float lie lies love lying man people said say says scenes sex space spurts teeth through tooth toothpaste travel tries weightless weightlessly weightlessness were werent when woman wow 165368

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I take it we got the account.

Marisa Acocella (8/2/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

540

account advertising after brandi brassiere business businesswoman chastain china colleague cup defeated did general jubilant nude off office people recently ripped shirt sign soccer soccer-style sport takes team this us was winning woman womans women world 165369

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont waste time on Daddy. Mummys the money.

William Hamilton (8/2/1999)

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541

boyfriend brings fathers home meet mothers parents people relationships rich time waste wealthy woman young 165370

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I cant help thinking theres a book in this.

Mick Stevens (8/2/1999)

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542

adam bible books eden eve garden general genesis nude old publishing religion testament think thinking tree under writing 165371

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Remember to round off each billable hour to the nearest week.

Leo Cullum (8/2/1999)

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543

accountants billable boss business cliche cliches employee estimate estimation ethics executives expressions fees greed language lawyers math mathematics meets money off play round word words 165372

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I assume its a different Rudy.

James Stevenson (8/2/1999)

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544

called city consumerism couple crackdown different district establishment general giuliani giulianis light look manhattan mayor neighborhoods new nyc porn pornographatoriums pornography red refers regional rudolph rudys sex signs square store stores tawdry times urban xxx york 165373

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Harry Bliss (8/2/1999)

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545

babies baby booth boy captionless check child children cliche cliches coats couple expressions general hooks hosts inside language leaves near other over parents play restaurant restaurants says several sign small station suspended their word words 16537 4

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were planning on sending him away to be reared by experts.

Barbara Smaller (8/2/1999)

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546

bassinet child childhood children clasped education experts families family guest hands kids over parent parenting parents plan planning proud reared rearing send sending speaks stand woman 165375

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I understood each and every word you said


but not the order in which they appeared.

William Haefeli (8/2/1999)

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547

almost cliche cliches cocktail expressions identical-looking language look-alikes men order parties party play talk two understand understood word words 165376

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

They have no lives, so they watch us.

Donald Reilly (8/2/1999)

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548

animals boat cape general humpback life lives nature ships tourists two underneath watch whale whales 165377

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Look, I cant promise Ill change,


but I can promise Ill pretend to change.

Robert Mankoff (8/2/1999)

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549

adultery change dinner discussion fake fights general have heavy impersonate left man marital marriage over pretend relationship relationships restaurants their woman 165378

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He has some food issues.

Robert Weber (8/2/1999)

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550

babies behavior chair children discipline eat eating everywhere father food general habits high hurl infant issues kitchen mother son stand their watching 165379

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I like things to be done my own particular way


by someone other than me.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (8/2/1999)

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551

business desk executive executives general older own particular phone telephones way 165380

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward Koren (8/2/1999)

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552

animals automobiles autos back best bumper canines captionless car cars classroom cliche cliches curtis dog doggie dogs drive driving education elementary expressions friend general honor language man's obedience pet pets pickup play pooch pupil puppies puppy reads roll school schoolroom sticker stickers student students teach teachers teaching truck word words 165381

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

For a transcript of tonights Hollywood Squares,


send two dollars and a self-addressed, stamped
envelope to this address.

Michael Maslin (8/2/1999)

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553

down entertainment game hollywood intently letters man notes shows television transcript tv watching 165382

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You look sharp, like a carefully aged Cheddar.

Victoria Roberts (8/2/1999)

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554

age appearances attire boutique cheese cliche cliches clothes clothing dining elevator elevators expressions fashion flirtations food high language looks love man middle middle-aged pickups play relationships sales says scenes sharp shop shopping style trend trendy woman word words 165383

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He thinks hes located a World War I torpedo boat.


Whats exciting at your house?

George Booth (8/2/1999)

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555

age bike boat busted crate crude divers dog empty engine exciting first gossip half-covered news oil phone shipyard-side skin soap torpedo woman 165384

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments.


Hang on, Ill get you a menu.

Charles Barsotti (8/2/1999)

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556

accidentally bible brings cuisine dining eat eating eats food foods god law laws man meals menu religion restaurant restaurants service waiter waiters waitress waitresses 165385

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (8/2/1999)

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557

amendment association captionless chast firearms for gun guns handguns license licenses n.r.as national pistol revolver rifle rifles roz s second test tests the violence weaponry weapons written 165386

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Where were you when you realized there was nothing else to say?

R.J. Matson (8/9/1999)

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558

broadcast cliche cliches commentators communications correspondent crash discuss end expressions john journalism jr kennedy language media news newscast newscaster plane play press programming reporter reporting said say saying story television tragedy tv word words 165387

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day.


Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life.

Leo Cullum (8/9/1999)

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559

another bar bars beer cliche cliches drinking expressions fishing general language one play sayings sitting word words 165388

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Let me through. Im a compassionate conservative.

Mick Stevens (8/9/1999)

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560

accident accidents briefcase bush bushs campaigns cliche cliches doctor elections enters expressions george gov language man medical parties party play political politicians politics refers republican republicans scene self-description street suit washington word words 165389

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

City kids.

Harry Bliss (8/9/1999)

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561

adults apartment apartments available beach beaches building buildings castle-apartment comment efficiencies estate flat home homes house real rent sand sandcastles says sign swimming two urban vacation walking 165390

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.C. Duffy (8/9/1999)

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562

architecture cat cats duffy feet general hole incompetents leg mans mice mouse mousehole out sees shoes sticking 165391

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You know what I like about power? Its so damn empowering.

Robert Mankoff (8/9/1999)

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563

another arrogance cliche cliches ego empowering expressions language like office one play political politician politics power washington word words 165392

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., so maybe a little static electricity isnt helping our


marriagebut it isnt hurting it, either.

Michael Maslin (8/9/1999)

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564

before cliche cliches couple electricity emanating expressions feeling fights general help hurt kneel language marital marriage married play reception screen signal static television tv word words 165393

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Before we continue, is there anyone else present


who has never seen a dead person?

Frank Cotham (8/9/1999)

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565

black body burial cemetery dead death funeral funerals grave graveyard humor invites mourners mourning open-casket pastor person plot see service tomb tombstone view wake 165394

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont buy stocks simply because others are buying them.


I buy them because many, many others are buying them.

Richard Cline (8/9/1999)

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566

ascend bear bonds brokers bull buy consumerism dollar economy elaborate finance investments man many market money nyse people rich staircase stock stocks street upper-class wall woman 165395

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yes, but take away the rodent droppings and the occasional shard
of glass, and youve still got a damn fine product.

Jack Ziegler (8/9/1999)

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567

company condemned department executives food foods general glass health media mice microphone product public rats relations rodents spokesman 165396

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And, Catheven if you say no, I want you to know


that youll always be the template.

William Hamilton (8/9/1999)

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568

affection bride ceremony cliche cliches couch domestic expressions front glasses groom knees language love man marriage marry matrimony nuptial play proposals propose proposesitting proposing prototype relations relationships romance template wed wedding where woman word words 165397

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gentlemen, its time we gave some serious thought


to the effects of global warming.

Mick Stevens (8/9/1999)

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569

campaign campaigning candidate civil election environment flooded floods global government incompetents office official officials platform political politicians politics pollution president serious thought warming washington water 165398

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I only sniffed his ass to be polite.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (8/9/1999)

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570

adultery affair another ass behavior cheat cheating code courtesy dog dogs etiquette explain explaining explanation extramarital fights general graces infidelity kiss kissing manners marital noses of one polite rude rudeness schmoozing sniff sniffing social 165399

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Christopher Weyant (8/9/1999)

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571

armor ball beach beaches cancer holds knight knights lotions man oil protection rating rays reads refers s s.p.f. scale skin suit sun sunbathing sunscreen suntan swimming tan title ultraviolet uv 165400

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes swearing in full sentences now.

Pat Byrnes (8/16/1999)

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572

bench benches ccuss child children curse cursing cussing family foul general language mothers nearby ones parent parenting parents park proud rearing sentence speaking speech swear swearing talking toddler two women word words 165401

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I know he cheated on me because of his childhood


abuse, but I shot him because of mine.

Robert Mankoff (8/16/1999)

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573

abuse actions adultery affair cheat cheating child court courthouse courtroom explains extramarital family fights guilt guilty guns infidelity innocence innocent judge judicial juries jury law lawyers legal marital murder obstacles problems scenes stand system trial violence witness woman 165402

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I heard he came into money and moved to a portobello.

Mike Twohy (8/16/1999)

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574

another apartment apartments building class elves estate flat food foods gnome gnomes home homes house ireland leprechaun money mushroom mushrooms myths one opulence outside real regional rent rich sitting their toadstool toadstools upper wealth wealthy 165403

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

David Sipress (8/16/1999)

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575

bear beggar beggars bonds brokers bull bum bums captionless change com cup dime dollar donations economy finance hobo hobos homeless homelessness internet invest investment investments investors many market money name names nyse one other passersby poor poverty reading receiving side-by-side sign spare spare-a-dime stock stocks street technology tin tramp tramps two urban wall web website websites 165404

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I need another week.

Charles Barsotti (8/16/1999)

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576

beach cellular contorted geometrically man need phone position problems relax serene serenity shaped stress stressed telephones tranquility unwind vacation vacations week wound 165405

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The occasion? Ohthat would be the fifth anniversary


of our never having got married because of an earlier experience
of yours that had nothing to do with me.

William Hamilton (8/16/1999)

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577

anniversaries boyfriend candlelight dinner during fear fights marital marriage past phobia pours proposals relationships wine woman 165406

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Into every shopping cart a little mysterious


Mediterranean product must fall.

Victoria Roberts (8/16/1999)

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578

consumerism fall falling food holding man mysterious next products pushing regional supermarkets woman 165407

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Once you have children, it forever changes the way you bore other people.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (8/16/1999)

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579

bore boring child childhood children families family general kids living parent parenting parents problems rearing room telephone telephones woman 165408

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sorrythe chocolate-almond biscotti are out of stock.


Id be happy to order one for you.

Michael Maslin (8/16/1999)

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580

almond biscotti books bookstore bookstores chocolate clerk cliche cliches coffee counter customer expressions fad food general language order play trend trendy word words 165409

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist.

Frank Cotham (8/16/1999)

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581

analyst comes coming general guests home husband husbands intervention medical parties party patient problems psychiatrist psychiatrists psychiatry psychologists psychology relationships session surprise therapist therapists therapy wary 165410

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Not in front of the crew!

Gahan Wilson (8/16/1999)

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582

background captain cat cats crew days general giggle incompetents leg legs members olden peg pets pirate pirates scratching wooden 165411

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We are so in synch. I was just about to ask you for a divorce.

Barbara Smaller (8/16/1999)

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583

ask divorce fights general husband husbands living love marital reading relationships room scenes synchronize synchronized wife wives 165412

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont you think its time you started thinking about your legacy?

Robert Weber (8/16/1999)

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584

behind bill clinton couch divorce husband husbands legacy marriage pres relationships standing tv watching wife will 165413

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would you like me to warm up your eggs?

Danny Shanahan (8/16/1999)

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585

animals birds breakfast chickens counter customer diner eggs food hen language service talking waiters waitress waitresses warm 165414

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I had that, only worse.

Benita Epstein (8/16/1999)

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586

being casket cemeteries death funeral funerals ground illness into lowered man medical talking woman worse 165415

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I cant understand a word you say when your helmet is shut.

George Booth (8/16/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

587

antique blown-out diving engine fights floor head helmets incompetents kitchen man marital relationships rowboat seaside shanty table tire town understand woman 165416

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (8/16/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

588

ancient astoria bag bags boilosity ceremonial ceremonies ceremony cooking decanting drinking filling fire future holy into kitchens mug mystical placing queens regional sacred saving sounding steeping tea upon use vessel whistle 165417

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Attention passengers. Flight 369 has been cancelled


due to our desire to ruin your life.

Matthew Diffee (8/16/1999)

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589

airplanes airport announces cancel cancelled departure gate general incompetents life problems ruin travel waiting woman 165418

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont you dare put Mommy on hold again.

Peter Steiner (8/16/1999)

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590

busy cellular child children city family general hold mom mothers parents phone portable street telephones urban 165419

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Did you bring a duplicate copy of your Times obit with you?

Arnie Levin (8/16/1999)

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591

baseball cap death duplicate gates heaven man media new newspaper obituaries paper pearly peter times york 165420

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I had no idea it was this serious.

Robert Mankoff (8/23/1999)

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592

because become couple depletion desert drives drought environment into jersey new recent regional road signs which 165421

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sam Gross (8/23/1999)

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593

alien bouncers captionless club creatures doorman doormen ejected ejecting explorers outer sci-fi space travel 165422

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I never had a problem before those goddam Bob Dole ads.

David Sipress (8/23/1999)

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594

advertising bed general husband impotence relationships robert sex viagra washington wife 165423

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Of course he looks peacefulhes lived his entire life in a bull market.

Barbara Smaller (8/23/1999)

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595

boy brokers bull children father fathers finishes general life little market mother peaceful reading sleep stock stocks tucking 165424

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Anyhow, according to the Science Times, things would have turned out
quite a bit differently if that meteor had hit Earth.

Gahan Wilson (8/23/1999)

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596

age another around asteroids business-dinosaur dinosaurs environment extinction human humans leash like looking meteors nature new one passes says small stone suits third times walking york 165425

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im sorrydid you say something? I was off creating my own reality.

William Haefeli (8/23/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

597

create dinner eating fights -general love man marital problems reality relationship say saying scenes virtual woman 165426

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.C. Duffy (8/23/1999)

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598

briefs captionless duffy fashion form general inventions life modern pair panties playground playgrounds swings underwear 165427

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Cheney (8/23/1999)

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599

bed bedroom both divorce dummies escape escaped have husband left marriage master places prison prisoners relationships scenes sheet stuffed their tied via wife window 165428

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My only crime, Denise, was loving you too much.


That and embezzling your trust fund.

Leo Cullum (8/23/1999)

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600

booth collar crime criminals dating embezzle embezzler embezzling fights fund general love loving man marital money people relationships restaurant restaurants rich scenes trust white woman 165429

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I see Daddys back from the gun show.

Robert Weber (8/23/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

601

cannon driveway fathers gun guns huge husband legislation looks out pulling recent refers regulate show shows tanks window woman 165430

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Leeches dont bother meIm a lawyer.

Frank Cotham (8/23/1999)

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602

bother briefcase ethics general guide head lawyers over swamp swamps through wade 165431

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im used to having a pussycat doctor.

Arnie Levin (8/23/1999)

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603

animals cats clipboard doctors exam general herself hides looking medical men modestly owl patients problems pussycat stands table talking women 165432

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

To be frozen solid for a while on the north slope of Mt. Everest


would, I occasionally feel, be a welcome change.

Jack Ziegler (8/23/1999)

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604

argument climbers couple fights george having living mallory marital mount mountain room their winter 165433

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (8/23/1999)

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605

bug clocks clothes computer-clock computers decor internet january man millennium new olden problem style technology time times travel y2k yearrefers 165434

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (8/23/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

606

-b apartment apartments back campaign campaigns cant captionless cares clinton closer coming confronts daughter families family get going have hillary hillarys husband listening live mall monkey monkeys mother next paid pain politicalfather salaries says school senate shopping should sister sisters sleazy son teachers teen-age their tour want washington week werent why wish woes young 165435

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He hasnt slept well since his dreams started carrying advertising.

Michael Maslin (8/23/1999)

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607

advertisements advertising appear automobiles balloon car cola dreams etc general head husbands living man over room sleep sleeping talking win women 165436

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Cmon, Sugar, take a walk on the mild side.

Marisa Acocella (8/23/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

608

bar bars beat beatniks businessman conservative dating fashion flirtations general generation hippies introductions language lou love lyrics mild parody pick-ups propositioning punk-girl reed scenes side song walk wild young 165437

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is the grand ballroom. I think it has a lot of potential.

Peter Steiner (8/23/1999)

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609

apartment apartments architecture ballrooms building buyers empty enormous estate flat home homes house interiors potential prospective real realtor rent rich 165438

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Christopher Weyant (8/23/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

610

airliner airplanes below bumperstickers captionless delivery done driving flying general hows incompetents jet language limousines my numbers painted play runway signs tail telephone usually vans word 165439

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were really bonding now, arent we, Dad?

Edward Koren (8/23/1999)

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611

bond bonding canoe canoes children down face fathers frightened going look male parents rapid son sons sports steep vacation vacations whitewater 165440

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mr. Goodrich, what say we tell each other our darkest fantasies
and start exploring the outer limits of modern sexuality.

George Booth (8/23/1999)

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612

age bed bedroom cats fantasy fedora five general incompetents kinky man modern number relationships rollers scenes sex sexual shirt small together woman 165441

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mumford! I thought you were killed instantly.

Danny Shanahan (8/23/1999)

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613

another death desk doorway executive executives fire firing instantly kill killed killing looking office working 165442

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Page two, paragraph six: The moral high ground


were prepared to yield totally on that point.

Charles Barsotti (8/23/1999)

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614

contracts executives fables fox ground high lawyers moral negotiations rabbit 165443

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ah! Here it is!

Michael Crawford (8/23/1999)

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615

age bathroom bathrooms bottle cabinet depression finds large life medicine middle play problems products relationship woman word zest 165444

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You were ferocious when you rushed to get us those seats on the Jitney.

Victoria Roberts (8/23/1999)

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616

beach beaches caf envy ferocious ferocity general hamptons husbands man praising relationships restaurants seats swimming triumph vacations wives womans 165445

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Very good, Larry! Just one more step and


youll have the entire aisle blocked!

Kim Warp (8/23/1999)

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617

age aging arrogance being block blocked cart citizen citizens elderly how incompetent man old program retirement senior shopping supermarkets taught title training 165446

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Donald Reilly (8/23/1999)

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618

baby-sitters bait children discipline dock fishing front general hour includes kids little out reads shop sign tackle taken vacations which 165447

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont mean to dampen your enthusiasm, but your


use of the phrase or die trying is a tad unsettling.

Alex Gregory (8/23/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

619

burial cemetery cliche cliches climbers death enthusiasm expressions face funeral grave graveyard language mountain mourning or play plot rock steep tomb tombstone trying wake word words 165448

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Life sucks and then you keep living.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (8/23/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

620

advice age cliche cliches down expressions language obstacles play problems street stress talking two walk woman word words younger 165449

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

With me its neither nature nor nurture. Its Satan.

Peter C. Vey (8/23/1999)

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621

businessmen devils discussing down executives hell language men myths nature nurture religon street two walk 165450

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wow! Labor Day already?

Mick Stevens (9/6/1999)

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622

backyard beaches bottom drained holiday holidays life man modern pool pools suddenly summer swimming which woman work 165451

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And now Id like to do my impersonation


of a happily married woman.

Michael Maslin (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

623

cocktail couple fights front general head marital marriage married parties party problems relationships walk 165452

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

See, Jimmy? If they give a big tax cut to the wealthy, those
guysll feel good and have us come fix their roof and stuff.

Robert Weber (9/6/1999)

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624

bar cut drinks feel feeling general handymen having people rich roof tax taxes two washington workmen 165453

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Can you believe it? A couple of page-turners,


one affair, and, whamits Labor Day.

William Hamilton (9/6/1999)

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625

adultery affairs automobiles background beach beaches books car driving general love pager-turner season sex summer swimming two women 165454

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lets have a heart-to-heart talkone huge, powerful


grownup to one tiny, nothing kid.

Gahan Wilson (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

626

boy children family fathers general heart-to-heart huge language lap large little man parents play word 165455

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Christopher Weyant (9/6/1999)

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627

amusement atlanta brokers called claiming co-workers coaster coasters day family financial incident killed market park parks past pressure recent refers roller stock stocks the trader violent where 165456

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The relatively placid seas and those vacationers behind me


notwithstanding, Dan, its really starting to blow out here.

Jack Ziegler (9/6/1999)

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628

anchorman approaching beach beaches blow get hat holding hurricane hurricanes media news onto scoop sunny swimming television tries vacation weather 165457

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So its a case of he said, she said, it said.

J.B. Handelsman (9/6/1999)

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629

adam apple bible blames devil down eden eve fights finger garden god looks marital points problems relationships religion snake 165458

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Eat your lunch, and then well see about giving your phone back.

Charles Barsotti (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

630

arrogance beepers cellular cliche cliches confiscates diner expressions language lunch obstacles parent play portable restaurants service surprised-looking telephones waiter waiters word words 165459

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

See, its right here in the pre-nup.


If you walk out, I get two weeks severance sex.

Robert Mankoff (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

631

agreements bags contract divorce document fire fired firing good hand home husband law leaving obstacles points prenuptial problems ready relationships severance sex weeks while wives woman 165460

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Something ought to be left to the imagination.

Danny Shanahan (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

632

animals bare clothing comment dogs female freshly general haircuts imagination leash male naked nude nudity poodle shaved talking two walking 165461

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And Im sure no one will mind if we fold


a few clothes while we talk.

Kim Warp (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

633

baskets board boardroom chairman clothing discussion executive executives female fold full general household laundry leads management meetings sit table two women 165462

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The pompano poached in parchment is very alliterative tonight.

Leo Cullum (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

634

advising booth diner language leaning over parchment play restaurants service waiter waiters word 165463

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im still a work-in-hiding.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

635

couch general in-progress insecurity language living phone play problems room talking telephones woman word work- work-in-hiding 165464

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bernard Schoenbaum (9/6/1999)

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636

club clubs dollar dollar-sign-shaped furniture group groups love meetings members men mens organizations people rich seat seats signs sit sofa 165465

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont play hide-and-seek with me, Beverly! Because I always win!

George Booth (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

637

age booth butlers cat cats -general george hide-and-seek hiding house incompetents its out people pets rich rug rugs searching servants servents sticking tail through under wealthy win woman 165466

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If you require immediate assistance, press the pound sign.

John Caldwell (9/6/1999)

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638

behind businessmen button cliche cliches desk expressions forehead general incompetents language man play pound sign technology telephones tone touch word words 165467

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

M.K. Brown (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

639

abusive airlines airplane airplanes attendant businessman businessmen cage cages confinement courtesy executives fights flight general other passengers prison prisoners recent refers serves upswing violent 165468

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is this the movie of the week or the news of the day?

Mick Stevens (9/6/1999)

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640

balkans bombs bosnia exploding explosions general husband kosovo media movie movies news television watching week woman yugoslavia 165469

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Are you just pissing and moaning,


or can you verify what youre saying with data?

Edward Koren (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

641

angry another back bar bars baseball caps country data general males moaning pissing rural say saying statistics two types verify white woods 165470

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.C. Duffy (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

642

back cab cliche cliches duffy expressions general killing language looking me not passenger play sign signs taxis thank word words 165471

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (9/6/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

643

ago air all always another approaching array automobiles avenue back boat boring but buzzard came captain car chast cleaner clouds cold complete concentration confusing conveys cooler could counts craft dates day diagram doctors doing dont done down drive driving dry etc even exhilarating expanse experience expressway failure familiar farther finally first followed free general getting god groceries had harbor hardware home husband including just knew knots know konundrum krenskys landscape languages learned learning left library limitless majesty make mall maneuver map maps mesas near-home needed next not one only open out panel parallel parking peabody play reads realized reasonably receded right road route roz safe safety sail sailing sailors school sea seascape sees sense seven she shoreline shouting show shows sign signs sky spent spongy steered still store storm street such take thank the there thinking through time trees trip turning uncharted unlost using video was wasnt waters weird well were what wheel when where
whiffenpoof wind woman women writer years 165472

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats all very nice, Jefferson, but do you have any other new business?

Jack Ziegler (9/13/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

644

belly board boardroom businessmen chairman discussing executives fashion general group incompetents management meetings nice off one shows tattoo tattoos this trends weeks 165473

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.B. Handelsman (9/13/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

645

hour bank banks crime criminals general illegal implicated launder laundering man money money-laundering new passes reads recent refers russia russian scandal scheme sign this was weeks which window york 165474

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What I Did on My Summer Vacation, by special


arrangement with the New Jersey State Police.

Mick Stevens (9/13/1999)

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646

accompanied before boy boys cell child childhood children class classroom convict correctional crime criminals education essay facility general girl girls incarcerate incarcerated incarceration jail kid kids little preparing prison prisoners pupil read school schoolroom schools stands student students teach teachers teaching this troopers two weeks what young youth 165475

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now, this is a Francis Ford Coppola. We still havent been


here quite long enough to be drinkable ourselves.

William Hamilton (9/13/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

647

alcohol alcoholic california cinema cocktail director drink drinkable drinking entertainment film group hollywood large liquor motion movie movies parties people picture taste tasting test theater vineyard weeks wine 165476

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have you got that in bulletproof?

Victoria Roberts (9/13/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

648

advertising appearances armor attire boutique bulletproof buying campaign clerk clothes clothing everybody fashion gangster gap gaps gear general generalreferences guns insecurity looks navy obstacles problems protection protective rap sales shop shopping store style trend trendy vest vests woman zipper 165477

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is this the year, Pumpkin? Goodbye, love boat, hello, elder hostel?

Lee Lorenz (9/13/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

649

age aging armchair bathrobe boat citizen citizens cruise elder elderly general hostel husband husbands journey liners love ocean old paper pleasure senior ships travel trip vacation vacations wife 165478

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Not now, Matthew. This is Daddys quiet-desperation time.

Leo Cullum (9/13/1999)

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650

alcohol alcoholic alcoholism away balding child childhood children dad david depressed depression desperation drink drinking drunk families family fathers henry inebriated intoxicated kids liquor martini martinis parent parenting parents places play public quiet quiet-desperation quotes rearing sad shoos son thoreau word 165479

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ready, Harold? Youre the wicked troll and Im the garden


fairy, and youre very angry because you dont want me passing
over your bridge on my way to Grandmas house!

George Booth (9/13/1999)

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651

age angry antenna armchair believe bug-eyed childishness childrens cigar-smoking costume costumes crouches elderly enter fairy fantasy gamely general hat husband imagination living make next pointed prepares pretend pretending relationships room sex sexual stairs story tales troll wearing while wicked wife 165480

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I think it loves us.

Gahan Wilson (9/13/1999)

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652

animals aquariums fish goldfish huge human love notice outside pet pets relationships smiling talking tank their two 165481

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The music was so loud I couldnt hear myself talk.

Robert Weber (9/13/1999)

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653

arrogance center complains concert ego entertainment instrument leaving lincoln loud man music musical musician new performance problems regional singing song talk woman york 165482

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey! Get a load of the acoustics!

Sam Gross (9/13/1999)

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654

acoustics animals barrier board boat boats dock docked encounter funnel -general mice mouse obstacles problems rats rodent rodents ship ships sound talking trying 165483

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Maslin (9/13/1999)

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655

automobiles autos border car cars chorus drive drives driving entering general lyrics musical oklahoma ooooooooklahoma play reading refers regional road sign signs song state states theatre title word 165484

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Remember how big and clunky the first ones were?

Danny Shanahan (9/13/1999)

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656

beer clunky computers doll-sized dolls drinking fence frankenstein frankensteins front general law men monster monsters moores one stand toy toys two walks yard 165485

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were hoping for an uptick.

Edward Koren (9/13/1999)

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657

apparently before black brokers death deathbed doctor doctors examination fitness flatline general get health hope hoping hospitals humor looking m.d. market medical nurse one optimistic patient patients physician soon stand stock talks terminal three visitor well worried 165486

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yes, the underpants sighting is very interesting, but Im really more


intrigued by your observations of London and France.

Pat Byrnes (9/13/1999)

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658

boy boys child childhood children cliche cliches england expressions general girl girls kid kids language little nursery observations one others outside play playgrounds playing rhymes schoolyard see sightings underpants word words young youth 165487

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good news. Your execution was overturned on appeal.

Robert Mankoff (9/13/1999)

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659

appeals burial cell cemeteries cemetery client convict correctional court courthouse courtroom crime criminals death executions facility funeral grave graveyard guilt guilty incarcerate incarcerated incarceration incompetents innocence innocent jail judge judicial juries jury law lawyer lawyers legal mourning obstacles plot prison prisoners problems system talks tomb tombstone trial wake witness 165488

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

FACES

William Steig (9/13/1999)

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660

absract bizarre cranium face faces head heads men steig william wst 165489

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (9/20/1999)

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661

big business cartoon character characters company disney disneyland domination ears earth final merger mergers mickey mouse planet shows takeover walt world 165490

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Hachtman (9/20/1999)

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662

architecture bird building buildings city curse cuss donald finger flip flipping general gesture manhattan middle neighborhoods new nyc obscene regional shape shore side the trump urban west word york 165491

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The days of the bartender-psychologist are over, but


I can help if you have any software problems.

Sidney Harris (9/20/1999)

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663

advice bar barroom bars bartender bartender-psychologist bartenders beer booze chagrined commiserates computers customer drinking general help house manager problems psychiatrist psychologist pub public software system tavern technology 165492

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Call the Ford agencyanother supermodel just blew away.

Harry Bliss (9/20/1999)

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664

blew blown camera clinic death diets doctor doctors electric examination fan fans fashion fitness get hand health live m.d. machines medical model models nurse patients photo photograph photographer photographers photography physician picture pictures problems rehab shoot skinny snapshot soon stylist supermodel weight well wind 165493

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im not trying to change youIm trying to enhance you.

Warren Miller (9/20/1999)

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665

change changing date dates dating enhance fights general man marital marriage obstacles problems relationships restaurant restaurants table woman 165494

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bill Lee (9/20/1999)

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666

appearances asking attire beggar beggars bum bums clothes clothing fashion general hobo hobos homeless homelessness looks pay people phone phones poor poverty scenes sex sidewalk sitting street style talking telephones tramp tramps two urban walk wearing what 165495

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Frankly, I find style without substance a hell of a lot easier to cope with.

William Hamilton (9/20/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

667

another appearances attire boutique clothes clothing drinking fashion general life looks modern one people rich sales shop shopping style substance table tea trend trends trendy woman 165496

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Weve got a lot of deadwood in this firm, Crawford.


Lets give it back to the community.

Leo Cullum (9/20/1999)

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668

another board boss business chairmen collar community corporate deadwood desk employee employer employment executive executives fire fired firing give incompetents laid lay-off management members occupation off office one profession professional sitting terminate unemployment white work 165497

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Great for worship then! Great for retail now!

Edward Koren (9/20/1999)

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669

agent apartment apartments architecture building church churches estate five flat general group home homes house life modern real religion religious rent sale shows stores synagogue worship 165498

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill pencil you in for recess.

Robert Weber (9/20/1999)

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670

appointment appointments boy boys child childhood children classmate classroom dating desk education girl girls grade kid kids little pencil pupil recess schedules school schoolroom schools student students teach teachers teaching young youth 165499

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont think its sanitary to drink from the same footprint.

Frank Cotham (9/20/1999)

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671

age background cavemen dinosaurs dinosaurs drink drinking environment fitness footprints hands jurassic knees neanderthal prepare primitive safe sanitary stone thirsty two unsafe volcanoes water 165500

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I had a lovely time checking out great-looking men


checking out even better-looking men.

Marisa Acocella (9/20/1999)

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672

checking cocktail descending evening gay gays gowns homosexuals men out parties preference preferences sarcasm sarcastic sexual staircase talking two women 165501

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Had I known then what I know nowthat you have


the ability to attract ruby-throated hummingbirdsyes,
I probably wouldve married you.

Michael Maslin (9/20/1999)

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673

affection around attract birds bride ceremony domestic general groom head hover hummingbirds husbands know love man marriage marry matrimony nuptial propose relations relationships restaurant restaurants romance wed wedding woman 165502

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mort Gerberg (9/20/1999)

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674

automobiles battery batterys bridge bronx city down down-arrows general highway lanes left lyrics manhattan neighborhoods new nyc regional right road signs song traffic tunnel two under up-arrows urban york 165503

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im taking everything that looks twentieth-centuryish and tossing it.

Barbara Smaller (9/20/1999)

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675

appearances attire away bundle century centuryish closet closets clothes clothing fashion front garbage hand life looks man modern out style talking throw toss tossing trash trend trendy twentieth woman women 165504

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Palmer, I want you to see to the legwork;


Moscowitz, youll be my eyes and ears.

Danny Shanahan (9/20/1999)

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676

board boss business businessmen chairmen clam clams cliche cliches collar corporate ears employee employees employer employment executive executives expressions eyes general giant language legwork man-eating members occupation office play profession professional talk talking two which white word words work 165505

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hey, thats a cat trick.

Victoria Roberts (9/20/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

677

animals best canines cat cats cats cradle dog doggie dogs feline felines friend general husband making man's pet pets pooch pugs puppies puppy string tricks wife 165506

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Save it for the hair judge.

Michael Crawford (9/20/1999)

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678

arrests bad beauty cop cops court courthouse courtroom crime day enforcement fashion -general hair hairdo hairstyle having judge judges judicial law legal nypd officer police policeman policemen shops system trial woman 165507

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is Kevin. Kevin was uncool before uncool was cool.

Robert Mankoff (9/20/1999)

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679

another boyfriend cocktail cool country fad fads fashion geeky introduces introductions music nerdy parties party trend trends trendy uncool unpopular woman 165508

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Like all great art, it made me feel hopelessly inadequate.

David Sipress (9/20/1999)

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680

actor actress after art bewildered broadway dates entertainment general great hopeless inadequate leaves live looking make man movies performers play plays seeing social theater theatre woman year 165509

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (9/20/1999)

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681

advance all already anyway around authors bestseller better book books called chast children claims colleges complaining concerned doogie dumber engineering enough fancy gene genetic go good-for-nothing have improved intelligence jobs joe literature made manuscript meet memory men menial mice modifying most motto mouse needs non-smart nr2b off pressure princeton probably publishing refers roz say says science scientist sit smart smarter some strain than their them then theyd theyre time tiny too tsien university want were where within worrying writers writing 165510

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry, kidyour school vouchers no good here.

Danny Shanahan (9/27/1999)

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682

bar barroom bars bartender beer booze boy boys child childhood children credit drinking general girl girls house kid kids little money pub public school tavern voucher vouchers young youth 165512

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thats a mighty big louse, but Id hardly call it the louse of the century.

Frank Cotham (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

683

alley beggar beggars big bug bugs bum bums century discuss hobo hobos homeless homelessness insect insects language lice life louse men millennium modern play poor poverty their tramp tramps turn two word 165513

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

684

astronomy candies candy center core creamy cross-sectioned crust diagram diagrams earth food into layer layers mantle nougat planet science sweet sweetness three 165514

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Wait! Ive got a quarter!

Robert Mankoff (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

685

animals being best canines city cop cops crime dog doggie dogs enforcement friend general guns law life man's meter meters modern money new nypd officer out parking pet pets police policeman policemen pooch puppies puppy quarters rushes save scenes shot store street tied urban woman york 165515

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., here I am in the fourth grade, but is that really


what I want to be doing with my life?

Barbara Smaller (9/27/1999)

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686

boy boys careers child childhood children classroom doing education elementary entrance fourth general girl girls grade graders kid kids life little obstacles problems pupil school schoolroom schools sit steps student students teachers two young youth 165516

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Our house wine is abominable.

Victoria Roberts (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

687

abominable alcohol alcoholic couple cuisine dining dinner drink drinking eat eating eats food foods house incompetents liquor meals problems table wine 165517

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

688

cart dog dogs events food foods hot labelled life meat meat-related meats modern urban vendor vendors 165518

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

689

ate big dead eat eaten eating eats fish heroes rescue save saved schools shark sharkman sharks smaller super superhero superman through was 165519

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

PAIRS (1 of 3)

William Steig (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

690

animals best canines cat cats couple couples dog doggie dogs duo duos feline felines flute friend general grass man's music musicians nude pairs pet pets plays pooch puppies puppy relationships sitting steig william woman wst 174458

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

PAIRS (2 of 3)

William Steig (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

691

animals best canines cat cats couple couples dog doggie dogs duo duos feline felines flute friend general grass man's music musicians nude pairs pet pets plays pooch puppies puppy relationships sitting steig william woman wst 174459

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

PAIRS (3 of 3)

William Steig (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

692

animals best canines cat cats couple couples dog doggie dogs duo duos feline felines flute friend general grass man's music musicians nude pairs pet pets plays pooch puppies puppy relationships sitting steig william woman wst 174460

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mr. Mosbacher, are you expecting anything via U.P.S.?

Robert Weber (9/27/1999)

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693

ancient announces delivery executive executives expect expecting general history horse huge letter letters mail office parcel post postage postal postman receptionist receptionists service trojan united workers 165521

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Donald Reilly (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

694

accidents advertises advertising angry automobiles autos billboards busy car cars counselling disgruntled drive driving enraged furious -general highway -highways irate irritated mad posters psychiatrists psychologists rage road -signs sufferers traffic upset van 165522

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I had him declawed, de-toothed, de-whiskered, de-legged, and de-tailed.

Michael Maslin (9/27/1999)

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695

animals annoying appendage cat cats couple de-legged declawed every feline felines life modern pet pets potentially removed shows spherical tails whiskers whos woman 165523

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And then, in yet another stunning volte-face,


the artist rediscovered the human figure.

Lee Lorenz (9/27/1999)

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696

art artist artistic artists artwork audio canvas couple discover drawing exhibition face figure galleries gallery general human humanities life listens model modelling museum museums naked nude nudes older painter painters painting people pin-up sculpt sculptor sculpture style tour volte 165524

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

According to our time-and-motion studies, you handle your


time very well but a lot of your motion is wasted.

Sidney Harris (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

697

business cabinet cabinets consultant desks employee executives file filing general incompetents management motion office review reviewed surveys time time-and-motion top waste wasted workers 165525

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Remember that, honey? Serious testosterone.

Edward Koren (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

698

age aged aging automobiles autos car cars couple couples drive driving marriage married middle middled old sports testosterone watch young zoom 165526

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

As far as Im concerned, it just takes my kind.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

699

all board boss business businessmen chairmen cliche cliches collar concern corporate desk employee employer employment executives expressions general kind kinds language man members occupation office phone play profession professional takes telephones white word words work 165527

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good news, Mrs. BryantI think we got it all.

Danny Shanahan (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

700

bed beside cancer dead death die died doctor doctors empty examination fitness got health hospital hospitals husbands m.d. medical mourning nurse patients physician surgery woman 165528

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I sense a lot more going on with you than house-husband.

William Hamilton (9/27/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

701

adultery attraction attractive chase cocktail flirt flirtations flirting general hit hitting house-husband housewife husbands language love man married more on parties party pickups play scenes sense sex sexual woman word 165529

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Willard! About your mothers biscuits and coleslaw! Shut up about your
mothers biscuits! And shut up about your mothers coleslaw!

George Booth (9/27/1999)

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702

age anger angry bench benches bickering cold cole couple cuisine dining disgruntled eat eating eats enraged fights food foods furious irate irritated language mad marital marriage meals mothers park relationships slaw upset 165530

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And just what was that little window you clicked off when I came in?

Arnie Levin (9/27/1999)

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703

clicking computer computers couple couples fights internet laptop man marital marriage married peering pointing pornography relationships sex sitting technology windows woman 165531

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I really, really enjoyed your hype.

Liza Donnelly (10/4/1999)

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704

author book books bookstore bookstores hoots hype john language line meet play signing woman women word writers 165533

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The ads just say Everybody in Leatherthey dont say how much.

Victoria Roberts (10/4/1999)

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705

advertising dominatrix everybody fashion gap general husband leather minimal nude outfit relationships sex strappy woman 165534

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

As a cost-cutting measure, for our fall list we


have decided to bypass traditional bookstore sales and subsequent
remaindering, and instead go directly to the shredder.

Jack Ziegler (10/4/1999)

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706

book books bookstores conference denmore executive general others publishers publishing remainder shredder table 165535

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sam Gross (10/4/1999)

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707

bin books bookstore bookstores consumersim damaged library life man modern passes reads recorders shopping sign tape 165536

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Richard and I are planning on taking some


time off just to enjoy our purchases.

Barbara Smaller (10/4/1999)

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708

after consumerism couple enjoy friend packages people purchases rich shopping spree street vacations 165537

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Any intellectual property yet, honey?

Mike Twohy (10/4/1999)

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709

ask block frustasted going how husband husbands intellectual peeks problems property technology wife work writer writers 165538

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yep, thats itseven pages. I only write what I know.

Robert Weber (10/4/1999)

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710

book books editor general incompetents know pages publishers seven variations write writer writers young 165539

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Never forget where you came from, son.

Danny Shanahan (10/4/1999)

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711

anthropomorphic birds business businessmen executives family fathers feeding forget normal parents pigeons sons street suits talking 165540

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Somehow it never occurred to me that if I lived to be


ninety-six Id be ninety-six for all eternity.

Edward Sorel (10/4/1999)

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712

afterlife age aging angel angels black citizen citizens death elderly eternity gates halo heaven humor ninety-six old pearly senior wings young 165541

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (10/4/1999)

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713

art artists british brooklyn chalk chris damien dung elephant hirst metro museum ofili oil paints pastels sculpture sells sensation show store storesrefers supplies supply 165542

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He said he cant complain. Business is good.

Leo Cullum (10/4/1999)

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714

accidents been briefcase businessmen complain crushed death executives just kneeling man money other over passerby pedestrians safe safes urban 165543

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I thought it had a pretty good story and interesting


characters, but I really didnt like the font.

David Sipress (10/4/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

715

aged book books boy children class elementary font front general reading reads report school teachers 165544

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (10/4/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

716

american bleb boy chast council filet fish general greasymouth green gristle mer name names neptunes new ocean order pride revised roz sea seafood shinglefish sludgy various wavemaster 165545

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just dont come crawling back to me when I start becoming visible.

William Hamilton (10/4/1999)

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717

actors bag bed can crawl crawling fights holding language man marital packing relationships visible woman women writers 165546

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do we know for sure its a concussion and not just a Keatsian swoon?

Michael Crawford (10/4/1999)

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718

accident accidents after ambulance automobiles bandaged car carry concussion ems head john keats language man medical play stretcher swoon word workers 165547

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I do want to solve all my problems,


but Ill wait till it comes out in soft cover.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (10/4/1999)

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719

another best-seller book books consumerism down laziness lazy one pass problems publishing self-help shop soft stores street wait walking window woman women 165548

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Yes, he is a pet detective, and hes here on business.

Victoria Roberts (10/4/1999)

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720

armchair business cat cats detective explains general man movies pet police sitting sofa 165549

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youve hidden the mosquito repellent, havent you, Martha?

Victoria Roberts (10/11/1999)

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721

areas carried chair city death disease easy encephalitis face fever fights hide husband marital marriage mosquitoes mosquitos new nile nile-like ny outbreak refers relationships sitting sly smile summer surrounding west wife york 165550

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No doubt about it. The Internet poses a great threat to personal privacy.

Robert Mankoff (10/11/1999)

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722

another burlesque computers dancer exotic female life modern naked nude one peep people pole privacy room sex show strip stripper tease technology threat 165551

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

A lot of homework?

Barbara Smaller (10/11/1999)

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723

backpack children elementary general homework knapsacks mother over problems schoolbooks schools small son teachers tipped weight whos 165552

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive consolidated all our bills into one missed payment.

Frank Cotham (10/11/1999)

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724

bills couch debt husband incompetents lounging paying payment people poor problems table tray woman 165553

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Could you not call me Ray this time?

Harry Bliss (10/11/1999)

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725

bed bedroom couple fights having marital names problems relationships scenes sex 165554

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Of course, it helped that my father was also a king.

Gahan Wilson (10/11/1999)

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726

balcony children crown family fathers help helped king kingdom large parents royalty surveys 165555

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, if youre not going to say anything


could you please exude something?

Richard Cline (10/11/1999)

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727

cocktail exude fights language man marital parties party people relationships rich say stoic woman 165556

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, great! Here comes the policeman of the world again.

Jack Ziegler (10/11/1999)

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728

character crime dice fictional gambling general international jumps monkeys out playing police policeman tarzan toward tree 165557

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Son, everyone went to college in the sixtiesthere was a war going on.

Barbara Smaller (10/11/1999)

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729

american army boy chair college dodgers -draft easy education father fathers -general history newspaper reading sixties small vietnam vietnamese war 165558

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hope youve noticed that our menu is


refreshingly devoid of creativity.

Robert Weber (10/11/1999)

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730

couple creativity devoid food -general incompetents language menus restaurant restaurants table waiter waiters 165559

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now, with a firm twist, Ill remove his attorney.

Danny Shanahan (10/11/1999)

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731

another doctor general hospitals language lawyers medical one operating room surgeon surgery twist 165560

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is Mrs. Burlington Wells. One of my begonias went


off by accident and killed Mr. Goodrich.

George Booth (10/11/1999)

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732

accidents balcony begonias below death fallen flower flowers general guns head just man's police potted talking telephone telephones window woman 165561

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Nonsense, Im sure youll have no trouble at all


readjusting to life in the wild.

Charles Barsotti (10/11/1999)

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733

bird birds boss executives fire firing general glasses hierarchy management tie wearing 165562

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (10/11/1999)

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734

bottle cabinet captionless containing effects household labelled large man medical medicine open pills problems side staring thats 165563

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good Lord, Professor! There it goesthe theory of everything!

Lee Lorenz (10/11/1999)

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735

age attractive campus college everything female gawk general language physics professors scientists sex theory two undergrad women 165564

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (10/11/1999)

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736

adults age ager aspirin away bran burger caffeine cake candle cassette chocolate cigarettes coffees delight ed fast food foot gin-and-tonics grandmas grown grownup gum happy herbal hill kids lottery massage mcdonalds meals metamucil muffin new nicotine nineteen nodoz parody piece prunes restaurant scented seven shake shiatsu six special tea three ticket uncle ups windham 165565

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I lost everything in the Beanie Baby crash of 99.

Pat Byrnes (10/11/1999)

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737

all animals bar bars brokers craze depression economic fad general guy how incompetents market money stock stocks stubbly stuffed tells toy toys tramps trend trends trendy washed 165566

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do that thing where you leave.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (10/11/1999)

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738

aged couch divorce fights home husband husbands leave leaving marital marriage middle problems relationships thing woman 165567

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (10/11/1999)

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739

aaaaagh all aloe anyone approved awful axle b-84 bathroomsthe beer biloba blossom boosts bottles bourbon broccoli butter calcium calm caramel-walnut case catnip cereal chardonnay chast chip-cookiedough chocolate choices chrysanthemum cliff collect conditioner consumerism course cream crme-fraiche curds custard dandruff diazepam didn't dirty discussion don't doughnuts dumpster echinacea edge even ever extra-strength extract feel fill fine finishing five frankly gee genuine ginkgo ginseng granola gravel grease had
hair happen have having head herring honey hotel house household immune iron ironic it jojoba julep junk just kava-kava kids know kudzu latt life like little look lot love memory mine mint miss modern more much muffet mushroom next nine not now ocean of off oil one orange out parents parsley passionflower people pesto plus prell problems proliferation prosperity pumpkin push raisin-honey-nut rich rinse roz run safe sage sauce scientists scrub seagull-feather seaweed seed shampoo shampoos sherpa shoulder smells soap
some strong stuff such sunscreen super-ultra-fun system tears the theirs them there thing this three tofu too tragedy twelve-egg unusually vera vim vitamin wanted was water way we week what wheat-germ wheeeee whey why yak yeast 165568

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Not a single mention of how Bedtime for Bonzo


fits into the big picture.

Jack Ziegler (10/18/1999)

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740

bedtime big biographies biography bonzo books doorway dutch edmund front general man memoir morris movies picture porch pres reading reagan ronald talking washington wife 165569

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Robert Mankoff (10/18/1999)

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741

businessmen cell cellular edge features general inscribed life man modern off pedestal phone progress statue statues suit talking telephones walk 165570

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Just tell me about the new continent. I dont give a damn


what youve discovered about yourself.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (10/18/1999)

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742

addresses america christopher columbus courtroom days discover discovered explorer grumpy isabella olden queen royalty 165571

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Actually, Im hoping what Im going to be


when I grow up hasnt been invented yet.

Barbara Smaller (10/18/1999)

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743

children general grow hope hoping invent inventions jobs kids lockers pre-teen school schools teachers two work 165572

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, I cant come and play now, Bobby.


My dads teaching me how to eat pizza.

Liza Donnelly (10/18/1999)

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744

boy children come dad eat eating fathers food friend general near out parents phone pizza sits small sons telephones 165573

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im told the omelettes here have a broader purpose.

Peter C. Vey (10/18/1999)

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745

booth broader cuisine diner eggs food foods language low man menus omelets purpose reading restaurants woman 165574

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I, too, want to preserve the environment, just as it is:


acid rain, holes in the ozone layer, lots of crap in the air.

J.B. Handelsman (10/18/1999)

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746

acid businessmen cocktail conservative ecology environment general language man older parties party play pollution rain woman word 165575

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, I hope youre happy, Mr. Science Genius.


Now youve killed your little sister.

Jack Ziegler (10/18/1999)

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747

beside bird boy brothers cage chemistry dead death dog floor general girl mother murder poison scientists sets sisters test tube 165576

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ooh, look, Tom. A bright-yellow rubber worm


with a sharp metal hook in it.

Harry Bliss (10/18/1999)

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748

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

In the future, everyones going to stop talking


about being famous for fifteen minutes.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (10/18/1999)

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749

aged andy celebrities cocktail famous fifteen future man middle parties party warhol woman 165578

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Would you mind stepping out of the pumpkin, please?

Michael Maslin (10/18/1999)

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750

after back cinderella cinderellas coach cop fairy flashlight into over police pulled pumpkin tales traffic turns violations 165579

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

George Booth (10/18/1999)

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751

aimed captionless dictator dictators drainpipes funnel giving gutters long oil picturesque politics pouring rallies roof speech speeches top village wash water woman world 165580

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ah, youth!

Mike Twohy (10/18/1999)

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752

aging children couch father fathers front general laziness lazy out potato son teen television vegging wife youth 165581

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Benita Epstein (10/18/1999)

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753

animals apartment apartments barking different dogs each fights general other shut speaking speech talking two urban windows 165582

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If its any consolation, toward the end he was high as a kite.

Danny Shanahan (10/18/1999)

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754

consolation consoles death died doctor doctors drugs general high hospitals husband husbands just language marijuana medical morphine pain-killers patients room waiting whose woman 165583

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I think he was a celebrity.

Edward Koren (10/18/1999)

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755

celebrities celebrity children general horseback huge look medieval museums painting paintings royalty small swordsman times two 165584

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Thank you, but Ive already provided for my childrens college education.

Frank Cotham (10/18/1999)

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756

cape children college devil door door-to-door education front general home horns look salesmen satan soul standing suburban two 165585

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (10/18/1999)

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757

all bogey boogie bunny childhood christmas claus cosmology easter etc fairy family figures frosty genealogy general god heaven leprechauns major man mythical religion santa snowman the timmy tooth tree witches 165586

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You look sensational!

Leo Cullum (10/18/1999)

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758

composed dress dresses general headlines man new newspapers paper post praises publ sensational tabloid wearing woman york 165587

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I like to think that each generation will need a little


less therapy than the generation before.

Barbara Smaller (10/18/1999)

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759

another babies day fall general generation mother mothers one park problems pseudo psychiatrists psychologists science sitting their therapy 165588

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lieutenant, he left a suicide sticky.

Arnie Levin (10/18/1999)

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760

dead death detectives find general life man modern near note notes police post-it stickies suicide technology written 165589

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ruben Bolling (10/18/1999)

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761

business children childrens comic eight food happy harvey language law lawyer market meal options panel represents richards start stock trades 165590

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What shall we do with that hour we gain this weekend?

Edward Frascino (11/1/1999)

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762

age aging back backwards chair citizen citizens clock clocks daylight elderly husband old relationships remarks rocking savings senior set time woman 165591

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont want stock options. I want you to pay your tab.

Charles Barsotti (11/1/1999)

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763

alcohol alcoholic alcoholism bar bars bartender bear bills bonds brokers bull business credit dollar drink drinking drunk economy finance general inebriated internet intoxicated investments liquor market money nyse options sitting startups stock street tab wall 165592

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Susan Faludi would like to buy you a brewski.

Lee Lorenz (11/1/1999)

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764

after alcohol alcoholic alcoholism american author bar bars beer being betrayal book books bought brewski company cover drink drinking drunk faludis feminism flirtations general inebriated intoxicated liquor literature love man men morrow new pickups relationships scenes stiffed william working 165593

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Steiner (11/1/1999)

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765

atlanta baseball beside braves cap capsitting disgruntled event events game games general hats loss mets new patient psychiatrists psychologists refers rival rivalry rivals series slot sport sporting sports therapist wearing world yankees york 165594

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive seen the future and its my mother.

Barbara Smaller (11/1/1999)

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766

age bed fitness future husband looking menopause middle mirror mothers parents problems relationships sitting slip woman women 165595

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im looking for a nice cottage in a wooded area that would


appeal to children in the four-to-seven age group.

Bernard Schoenbaum (11/1/1999)

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767

agent childrens estate fairy find gingerbread gretel hansel home homes house houses housing real realtor realty story tales visits witch witches 165596

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its been a perfect eveningwhy ruin it with aggravated assault?

Michael Maslin (11/1/1999)

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768

clobber dates dating fights general hands man men midswing outstretched perfect purse rape relationships says social woman women 165597

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I think youll like this ideaits sort of dull meets inoffensive.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (11/1/1999)

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769

advertising businessmen campaign t directors dull executives general hollywood ideas inoffensive like man media movies pitches producers screenplay ad screenplays screenwriters show television 165598

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I dont think, David, that agreeing to disagree


is a good foundation for marriage.

Robert Weber (11/1/1999)

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770

affection agree bride ceremony conflicts domestic foundation general groom love mans marriage marry matrimony men nuptial problems proposal proposals propose relations relationships replies restaurant restaurants romance wed wedding woman women 165599

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its me, Luckyyou can drop the best-friend shtick.

Danny Shanahan (11/1/1999)

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771

animals another best canines cliche cliches dog doggie dogs expressions friend friends general language lolling man's one pet pets play pooch puppies puppy schtick see shtick smiling tail tongue wagging word words 165600

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What are you doing outside of coach?

Gahan Wilson (11/1/1999)

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772

airline airlines airplane airplanes attendant class coach confronted enters first flight -general hump lady monsters monstrous pirate pirates plane planes pretty seat seating seats section -stewardesses thin whip whips 165601

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now, were those friends of yours Gettys or Gottis?

William Hamilton (11/1/1999)

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773

asks celebrities celebrity class cocktail crime criminals don events fame famous friends fuel gangster gangsters gas gatherings general getty gotti introductions john leaving leisure mafia man mans mingling mob mobster mobsters mogul money names oil opulence parties party paul people petroleum rich social socializing upper wealth wealthy woman 165602

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Steiner (11/1/1999)

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774

caffeine captionless chocolate cigarettes cigars coffee coming food foods general have health life man modern mother natures reads red second sign signs soon store tobacco trends walks where window wine yes 165603

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Can anyone remember what our core business is?

Richard Cline (11/1/1999)

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775

around business conference executive executives female male meetings offices one remember sit subsidiaries table two 165604

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And thats how ya clean a deer!

Harry Bliss (11/1/1999)

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776

bloody boy carcass children classroom deer elementary general gut guts gutted hangs horrified hunting knife look next school schools show teacher teachers tell 165605

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We do it, Havermeyer, because our corporate parent says we must.

Jack Ziegler (11/1/1999)

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777

all around board business businessmen chairman company conference disney general hats meeting meetings men mickey mouse must offices room seated shouts table walt wearing 165606

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Leo Cullum (11/1/1999)

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778

beggar beggars bum bums captionless depressed depression general hobo hobos homeless homelessness look misery morose near panhandler poor poverty reads really sad sadness sign signs stands street tramp tramps unhappiness unhappy upset urban 165607

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (11/1/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

779

angry automobiles autos big captionless car cars disgruntled drive drivers driving enraged furious general grandma highway highways hurry irate irritated jackass mad make mind move over pal rage road say signs some thinking upset what whats 165608

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Have you ever seen a dream walking? Well, I have.

George Booth (11/1/1999)

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780

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I like thatcompassionate predators.

J.B. Handelsman (11/1/1999)

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781

bush campaign campaigning campaigns candidate candidates civil cliche cliches come compassion compassionate conservative conservatives describes description election expressions george gov government job language lions new official platform play political politicians politics predators presidential tigers two washington wild word words 165610

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

O.K., which cup is your job under now?

Peter C. Vey (11/1/1999)

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782

boss businessmen employees employment executive gamble gambling game insecurity job jobs offices personnel plays security shell 165611

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Theyve remained remarkably faithful to the text.

Nick Downes (11/1/1999)

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783

actor actress broadway cards cue dialogue entertainment faithful general hold lines literature novels performers play plays printed scenery signs text theater theatre types 165612

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (11/1/1999)

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784

bug captionless catholic catholicism christ christian christianity clouds computer computers down life lightning modern most mythology programs refers religion religious removed supposedly technology throws y2k year zeus 165613

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Interesting weekend, Prendergast?

Jack Ziegler (11/8/1999)

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785

after board business businessmen chairman conference guy klan klux life meetings modern monday offices outfit politics rally table weekend 165614

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I looked at you and thought, I bet this man runs marathons.

Edward Koren (11/8/1999)

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786

athlete athletics attraction attractive chase cocktail events figure figures fitness flirt flirtations flirting gatherings hit hitting introductions jog jogging leisure love marathon marathons meets mingling on parties party pickups run running scenes sex sexual social socializing sports stick woman 165615

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Mueller (11/8/1999)

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787

actually bathrobe captionless carriers computer computers e-mail electronic email grizzled internet life mail mailbox mailbox-computer mailboxes man modern office outside pajamas post technology wanders 165616

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Unfortunately, you have what we call no insurance.

Michael Maslin (11/8/1999)

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788

cant doctor doctors examination examining fitness get health insurance insured life m.d. medical medicine modern money no nurse patient patients physician room soon tells treated well without 165617

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You know, when I get over my thing for bad boys,


Chip, youre going to be one of the first to know.

William Hamilton (11/8/1999)

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789

bare couch cross-eyed feet general knees know love man marriage men personalities personality proposals proposing reclining relationships says scenes stereotype stereotypical thing woman women 165618

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Go to accounting and crunch the numbers people.

Frank Cotham (11/8/1999)

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790

accountant accountants angry board boss business businessmen chairmen collar corporate crime criminals crunch department employee employer employment executive executives hulking members numbers occupation office offices profession professional tells white work 165619

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Since we dont do payback dinners, how does eighty bucks sound


for the reasonably decent evening I think weve all had?

Michael Crawford (11/8/1999)

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791

another bill check cost couple couples decent dining dinner favor friends general house instead leaves money offering parties party pay payback restaurants returning them 165620

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I cant really talk about it. Theyre all for secret sexual stuff.

Peter Steiner (11/8/1999)

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792

army asks attraction attractive chase classified cocktail decorations explain flirt flirting general generals hit hitting life medals military modern on parties party politics secret sex sexual top woman 165621

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

To avoid the tedium of this endless socializing,


Eddie, I have decided, beginning Monday, to obtain
all my future booze from Amazon.com.

Jack Ziegler (11/8/1999)

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793

anymore back bar bars bartender bartenders booze coming computers drinking empty expansion general internet into leisure life liquor man modern newspaper other products reading refers technolgy tedium tells wont 165622

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I know I said I would marry you, but that was four hundred points ago!

Richard Cline (11/8/1999)

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794

affection bear because bonds bride brokers bull businessmen ceremony dollar domestic economy fall finance general groom investments life love man market marriage marry matrimony men modern money nuptial nyse people proposal proposals propose relations relationships rescinds rich rise romance stock stocks street wall wed wedding women 165623

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Please stay on the line. All of our customer-service


representatives are kidding around and throwing
paper airplanes at each other.

J.B. Handelsman (11/8/1999)

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795

airplanes coffee consumerism customer drinking general hold kidding off paper phone representatives service taken telephones waiting woman 165624

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I have to go wee-wee.

George Booth (11/8/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

796

army bathroom british cliche cliches days executed execution executions expressions guillotine language law man men olden play revolutionary rifles short surrounded urinate urination urine war wee-wee word words 165625

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And this is Daniel, who is busy working toward his degree in money.

Robert Weber (11/8/1999)

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797

business busy college diploma dollar economy education family finance friend general introduces introductions investments living market money mother room son sons stock studying 165626

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (11/8/1999)

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798

captionless consumerism counter different drinking fire general hydrant hydrants life modern regular service signs soda sparkling two types water 165627

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is the homework fresh?

Danny Shanahan (11/8/1999)

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799

animals asks best canines catchphrases cliche cliches cuisine dining dog doggie dogs eat eating eats education expressions food foods fresh friend general homework language man's meals pet pets play pooch puppies puppy restaurant restaurants school service waiter waiters waitress waitresses word words 165628

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

They suspect foul play.

Peter C. Vey (11/8/1999)

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800

black coffin death face foul funeral funerals general humor law look man mourners murder over parlor pillow pillows play police suspect 165629

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Leave your coats on the bed for collateral.

William Haefeli (11/8/1999)

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801

arrive beds coats cocktail collateral directs drinking ethics fancy friends general hostess leisure life man modern parties party their them woman 165630

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I hope you kept the box it came in.

Barbara Smaller (11/8/1999)

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802

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Genetic engineering got us into this mess,


and genetic engineering will get us out of it.

Sam Gross (11/8/1999)

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803

bloodhound bloodhounds clone cloning dna dogs engineering ground leash like make maze mazes mess mice miniature mouse people research science scientists sniffing technology their try two way 165632

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (11/8/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

804

after all anything bambi bambis basis behind belgian brown can cards cartoon cats cemeteries chast child children color congo curious dark death didnt difficult dont easy ethics even ever eye family fifi fine for general gets good grand grandfathers grandpa greeting had happened huh ingenuity isnt keep know last learn lets like little look looks mom mommy more need needs not nothing one over own page panel parents pet pets quick rack roz saw say see she shes shield shot simply start stone store stripes switcheroosympathy their them there thinks union watch watching well week what whats where wheres why woods wrong years youre 165633

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sometimes I think he can understand every word were saying.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (11/15/1999)

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805

across animals another chair communication couch dogs general husbands man marriage men one pets problems relationships sitting talking them understand woman women 165646

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (11/15/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

806

being browsing captive computer computers crime criminals held help internet man middle-aged porn porno pornography scene sex shouting sites sits spam table technology the through web 165647

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Maslin (11/15/1999)

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807

apron beaujolais consumerism customer drinking liquor nouveau out shop shopping some stomps stores trends vendor waits while-u-wait wine 165648

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When I actually was this age, I didnt have


much facial expression anyway.

William Hamilton (11/15/1999)

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808

age coffee expression face faces facial fitness friends life lift lifts medical middle modern over plastic surgery talks technology two woman 165649

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Weve got kind of a noir thing happening here, Manny.


The girlie cigarette doesnt exactly add.

Michael Crawford (11/15/1999)

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809

another cigarettes cigars crime criminal criminals fiction fitness friends general girlie guy leisure lights long macho mafia men noir one parties smoking thin type 165650

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im attracted to you, but then Im attracted to me, too.

Richard Cline (11/15/1999)

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810

attract attracted attraction bar bars couple discussing drinking general language leisure love narcissism play problems psychology relationship relationships scenes their word 165651

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Please listen carefully, as my menu options have changed.

J.C. Duffy (11/15/1999)

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811

bed bedroom client dominatrix duffy escort general hooker language life menus modern play prostitutes prostitution sadomasochism scenes sex technology telephones whip word 165652

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is this what I want to be doing with my death?

Bruce Eric Kaplan (11/15/1999)

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812

angel angels another clichs cloud death heaven language life mythology one philosophy play religion word 165653

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Can I get you something to eat?

Peter Steiner (11/15/1999)

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813

africa animals background cliche cliches dates eat expressions female food gazelle general graze herd language lion lions male nature play restaurants social talking tigers wild word words 165654

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tell me more about the years you spent in formaldehyde at Area 51.

Frank Cotham (11/15/1999)

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814

alien aliens applicant business-suited businessmen creatures employment formaldehyde job officer offices outer personnel sci-fi space travel 165655

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Luckily, none of the people inside appear to be celebrities.

Alex Gregory (11/15/1999)

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815

apartment broadcasts building celebrities celebrity ethics fame famous fire fires huge importance important journalists life media modern news reporter scene television urban 165656

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You are so stubborn.

Mick Stevens (11/15/1999)

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816

arrogance automobiles communication directions driven driver general going just male marriage men past problems psychology read relationships right road signs stubborn two way which woman women wrong 165657

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This is Daddy, honey. That was Daddys office voice.

Leo Cullum (11/15/1999)

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817

answers businessmen children desk family fathers general life man men modern office offices parents phone relationships sitting telephones voice 165658

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.B. Handelsman (11/15/1999)

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818

bad barbie-like cold daughter daughters dead death dolls fever fitness high ill illness jenny late life looking lou lovely mary medical medicine modern mother mothers patti running seriously she shes stand three toys under-the- under-the-weather weather women 165659

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then
your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green ones
wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini.

Jack Ziegler (11/15/1999)

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819

dining eating european explaining food futomaki general headphones japan japanese life male martini meal modern museum-style northern play recorders recording restaurant restaurants suit sushi tape technology tekkamaki trends wears 165660

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (11/15/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

820

actually again berlitz bright brush cant children communication conferences creative different doing drummer education english fine general guide guides hes homicidal into just kids language marches moron name needs none nuts parent-teacher parents people problems riot schools shes skills stand teacherese teachers the too translated translations very whats 165661

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward Koren (11/15/1999)

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821

brookside captionless cemeteries cemetery cigarettes cigars death fitness life medicine modern non-smokers non-smoking pointing restaurants sections signs smokers smoking toward 165662

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

He killed in rehab.

Danny Shanahan (11/15/1999)

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822

actors addiction agent agents center comedian actor-client comedians comedy drugs entertainment -general hollywood killed life media medical medicine modern movies obstacles office offices problems producer producers rehab rehabilitate rehabilitation sells 165663

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I still say we should get a queen-size mattress


despite the obvious jokes it will invite among the sales staff.

William Haefeli (11/15/1999)

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823

beds consumerism couple department gay general homosexual jokes language life male mattresses men modern out play queen queen-sized relationships sale shopping size store stores tries word 165664

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is the rabbit cute?

David Sipress (11/15/1999)

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824

bunnies bunny cuisine cute dining dinner eating food high leisure man rabbit rabbits restaurants service waiter waiters wide-eyed woman 165665

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

There. Now its all on paper. Feel better?

Charles Barsotti (11/15/1999)

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825

animals contract contracts deal feeling general lawyers negotiating offices paper rabbit rabbits talking two wolves 165666

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gahan Wilson (11/15/1999)

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826

ability about acceleration adapt against been big bugs chain claim consumers corporations destroys dna down earth eat edibles efforts enact enemies engineering environment evolution export fiction fight food foods fruits gahan genes genetic genetically genetics hasnt have helping hostile human-genome humanity imaginations increasing leads manipulate master may medicine modification nations natural occurred off only other our ourselves outcries over overactive panels program race result reversal right say science scientists serve similar slow suffer takes technology the them there theyre this unless us use vegetable vegetables wilson worry would 165667

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Good news, hon. Your doctor now has the right to recommend treatment.

Mick Stevens (11/22/1999)

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827

bureaucracy cartoonissue death decision doctors grave health husbands incompetents insurance life medical modern not os obstacles one patients problems recent recommend recommendations refers restrict visits woman 165669

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

So what. Nobody lives forever.

Edward Frascino (11/22/1999)

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828

animals birds cartoonissue cigarette cigarettes cigars death farmyard fitness holidays live one smoking talking thanksgiving turkeys 165672

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Made it in six. Billed them for seven.

Steve Way (11/22/1999)

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829

bills cartoonissue catholic catholicism christ christian christianity creation deal ethics genesis god halo how large lawyers religion religious swung tells 165673

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive just realized that the nagging little voice inside her head
that shell hear for the rest of her life is mine.

Barbara Smaller (11/22/1999)

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830

babies baby bedside cartoonissue general hear hearing hospital hospitals maternity mine mother mothers nag nagging new psychology relationships visitor voices wards woman 165674

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You do the hokeypokey and you turn yourself around


thats what its all about.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (11/22/1999)

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831

approaches cartoonissue dance dancing eastern fakirs guru gurus hiker hokey hokeypokey holy lyrics men mountain pokey religions song tells top yoga 165675

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I want you to meet Dave. Youll get a kick out of his money.

Marisa Acocella (11/22/1999)

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832

another art cartoonissue cocktail drink gallery introductions kick looking man money one parties relationships stylish woman 165676

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont be silly. If somethings worth doing, its worth doing fast!

Michael Crawford (11/22/1999)

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833

after bedroom cartoonissue consoles ejaculation fast man premature problems relationships scenes sex woman worth 165677

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your father and I just want you to know that were


behind you one hundred per cent should you decide to
go back to being a dope addict.

Nick Downes (11/22/1999)

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834

addict addictive bed cartoonissue concerned cults decisions dope drugs fitness hari head krishna parents problems room shaved sitting tambourine teen-agers toga toson 165678

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The difference between a correction and


a crash is usually your portfolio.

Richard Cline (11/22/1999)

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835

bear bonds brokers bull cartoonissue cliche cliches confers correction crash difference dollar economy employee employer expressions finance investments language market money nyse play portfolio stock stocks street wall word words 165679

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (1 of 14)

Mom, I am not a billionaire! A billion is like a


thousand million. Im worth a hundred million. A hundred
million is just a hundred million.

William Hamilton (11/22/1999)

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836

beatniks billion billionaire cartoonissue computer computers face front hippies internet language man million millionaires money mothers people phone play rich sits stubbly talking teen-agers word young 165680

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (2 of 14)

Actually, right now Im in retox.

Leo Cullum (11/22/1999)

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837

alcoholics another bar bars cartoonissue cliche cliches detox drinking expressions general language liquor man one play retox tramps word words 165681

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (3 of 14)

Jack Ziegler (11/22/1999)

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838

abandoned abductee abductions alien anger candidates captionless car cartoonissue club clubs correctional country country-club creatures darting desert display driver driving endings escape facility first general great hollywood john language man mccain movies off other outer panel piss pissed presidential prisoners prisons problems public recent refers republican road saucer screaming second sedona sen shouting shows spa space speeds temper things third this three title travel unrealistic unseen washington yelling 165683

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (4 of 14)

Shows you how much I know.

Frank Cotham (11/22/1999)

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839

bed cartoonissue covers death died doctor doctors education face hospital incompetents intern just know patient patients 165682

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (5 of 14)

Danny Shanahan (11/22/1999)

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840

backpacks cartoonissue children chiropractors chiropractors down fitness general hallways heavy kids loaded medical nurse nurses offices past school schools teachers through walk 165686

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (6 of 14)

Your editor wants to know if you have


enough flexibility to just give up.

Peter C. Vey (11/22/1999)

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841

authors bestseller block book books cartoonissue cell chain-smoking computer computers fail failure flexibility front give literature manuscript phone portable publishers publishing stubbly telephones woman writer writers writing 165685

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (7 of 14)

Are you sure this ice floe is going to pass by the nursing home?

Sam Gross (11/22/1999)

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842

age back cartoonissue death elderly eskimo eskimos family floes good-bye homes ice nursing regional relationships retirement shouts waving 165684

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (8 of 14)

Now, thats product placement!

Robert Mankoff (11/22/1999)

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843

advertisement advertisements advertising another art building cartoonissue commercials design designer empire enhanced enhancement erect erection executive executives general landmark looking marketing medical office one out performance phallic pill pills product running sex sexual state symbol symbolic vertically viagra virile virility window word 165687

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (9 of 14)

Would the gentleman prefer an antidepressant?

Christopher Weyant (11/22/1999)

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844

angry antidepressant cartoonissue drug drugs general man medicine psychiatry psychology restaurants sitting table upper uppers waiter waiters wine 165688

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (10 of 14)

Peter Steiner (11/22/1999)

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845

animals back cartoonissue eat eating farm feed feeding football general mother motherhood mothers piglets pigs sports suckling television watching 165690

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (11 of 14)

Does this make me your bitch?

Pat Byrnes (11/22/1999)

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846

after bitch cartoonissue cliche cliches doctor doctors exam examination exams expressions glove homosexuals jail jailhouse language latex makes male pants patient patients performing play prison prisoners prisons proctologist proctology prostate reference removes sodomy word words 165689

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (12 of 14)

Its sort of like a compass, see, except that wherever you


are in the world it points toward Connecticut.

Victoria Roberts (11/22/1999)

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847

always another assistants cartoonissue class cocktail compass digital inventions man mecca money opulence parties party people personal regional rich shows upper wealth wealthy which 165691

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (13 of 14)

When the Court questions a witness, the witness


is not permitted to reply, Lets not go there.

Donald Reilly (11/22/1999)

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848

admonishes cartoonissue cliche cliches counsels court courthouse courtroom evading expressions go guilt guilty innocence innocent judge judges judicial juries jury language law lawyers legal lets not play question scenes stand system there trial witness woman word words 165693

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

THE FUNNIES (14 of 14)

Mr. Brenson shed his skin this morning.


Is it possible for you to reschedule?

Michael Maslin (11/22/1999)

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849

appointments arrives attorney attorneys businessmen cartoonissue cliche cliches client desk expressions flattened floor general husk language law lawyers legal lies office play reception schedule shed skin snake snakes system word words 165692

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

When I grow up, I want to be rediscovered.

Robert Weber (11/22/1999)

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850

base boy cartoonissue children cliche cliches day discover expressions fall general girl grow language little play rediscovered swing tree word words 165694

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Edward Koren (11/22/1999)

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851

automobiles before brookfield cartoonissue england entering fishing general historic new parking problem quaint reads sign signs vacations village welcome 165695

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It says here that you gave a lot of money to both parties


and neither expected nor received anything in return. Very nice,
but well have to put you in the crazy section.

J.B. Handelsman (11/22/1999)

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852

afterlife angel angels campaign cartoonissue cliche cliches crazy death democratic expressions financing gate gates halo heaven language man money nice pajamas party pearly peter peters play politics republican washington wings word words 165696

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

At least, we dont have to sit through some big, prolonged trial.

Jack Ziegler (11/22/1999)

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853

adam angel angels angry banished bible cartoonissue catholic catholicism christ christian christianity cloud eden eve garden god hand looking original pointing problems prolonged religion religious sin trials 165697

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Goodbye, Masked Kid, and thanks for all the help!

Gahan Wilson (11/22/1999)

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854

boy cartoonissue childrens coin-operated cowboy cowboys family frontier general good-bye help horse into mechanical off outfit riding sidewalk-type sunset superheroes toys waves westerns 165698

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You make me want to be a better man, Olivia.


Then maybe I could find somebody else.

J.C. Duffy (11/22/1999)

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855

better breakups cartoonissue celebrities coffee cup duffy famous general gets good holding jack line love man movie movies nicholson refers restaurant restaurants scenes table woman 165699

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We blew a fuse.

George Booth (11/22/1999)

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856

adjustments annoyed attached blew blown cartoonissue castle dr electricity fiction frankenstein frankensteins fuses igor ill-looking laboratory making monster monter nearby obstacles problems scientists shelly sick slab stands tells theyve 165700

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes talking now, but only through his attorney.

Liza Donnelly (11/22/1999)

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857

another babies behind boy cartoonissue children cliche cliches couple expressions floor general jabout language law lawyer lawyers legal life modern parent play playing relationships small standing system talk talking word words 165701

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Lee Lorenz (11/22/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

858

ads affair and or another bill blow campaign campaigning candidate cartoonissue chair civil cliche cliches clinton club clubs dole election except expressions fellatio government group groups job language lewinsky man meetings members monica office official one oral organizations oval platform play political politicians politics pres president refers robert sen sex viagra washington word words 165702

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I cant decide whether to turn pro first or go directly into rehab.

Mort Gerberg (11/22/1999)

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859

another bench cartoonissue center college decide decision decisions drug drugs football game games medical one player problems rehab rehabilitation sitting sport sports students 165703

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

John OBrien (11/22/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

860

asks attending bailiff bride brides captionless cartoonissue ceremony court courtroom divorce domestic each groom guest he she life love marriage marry matrimony modern nuptial people person proceedings relations relationships scenes seating ushers wed wedding weddings 165704

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And that one I tagged with a flamethrower from ten yards.

Harry Bliss (11/22/1999)

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861

apparently blackened burn burned burnt cartoonissue charcoal charred deer fire fireplace flamethrowers head home hunt hunter hunters hunting incompetents life modern one points torch trophies trophy wall 165705

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This may surprise you, Worthington, but Im a man who believes


that nothing in life is as important as family.

David Sipress (11/22/1999)

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862

across board boss business businessman businessmen cartoonissue chairmen child childhood children collar corporate desk desks employee employer employment executives families family framed general kids life members occupation office parent parenting parents photographs piled profession professional rearing relationships surprise white work 165706

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

The special, sir. Shall I spread it out or will you knock it over yourself?

Charles Barsotti (11/22/1999)

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863

beat brings can cans cartoonissue cusine customer dog dogs food full garbage general knock low restaurants special table trash waiter waiters 165707

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Actually, the attraction wasnt freedom from religious


persecution but, rather, the all-you-can-eat buffet.

Christopher Weyant (11/29/1999)

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864

all-you-can- american buffet came days dining dinner eat england explains family first food friends general history holiday holidays native new olden pilgrim pilgrims plymouth the politics religion restaurants settlers thanksgiving turkey why world 165710

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hes moving his campaign headquarters back to Paris.


He wants to be closer to the French people.

Frank Cotham (11/29/1999)

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865

american campaigns days fields france general gore gores history horseback knee-deep leads military move napoleon napoleonic olden people political politicians politics presidential refers russia snow tennessee through troops vice-pres war washington 165711

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its our time of Thanksgiving.

Sam Gross (11/29/1999)

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866

before birds bow dinner down family god head holiday holidays its large mouth natives out pilgrims religion sticking thanksgiving turkey turkeys volcano volcanoes worship worshipping 165712

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We do all our own parenting.

David Sipress (11/29/1999)

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867

blocks brags child childhood children families family fathers floor friends general household husband husbands kids leisure mother mothers parent parenting parents playing rearing son style yourself 165713

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Well, once again I find myself all pumped up with no place to go.

William Haefeli (11/29/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

868

after background club gym dressed exercise getting guys gym gymnasiums health lifting locker men pumped relationships room their trainer walks weight weightlifing workout 165714

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

J.C. Duffy (11/29/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

869

animals apartment apparently buildings captionless cat cats city discovers donald duffy estate extremely feline felines general luxury manhattan mice mousehole neighborhoods new nyc owned pet pets real regional rodent rodents tall trump urban york 165715

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Im pretty sure its a jaybird.

Danny Shanahan (11/29/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

870

bald bird birdhouses birds catchphrases cliches couple eats expression feeder feeders general jaybird langauge looks naked nude people plucked naked refers skin slogans their through time-worn window 165716

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Why is it that they always go around


talking about how they earned their stripes?

Ed Fisher (11/29/1999)

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871

africa animals catchphrases cliches commenting earn field jungle jungles language monkeys nature savannah slogans stripes two variations wild zebras 165717

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

A red-figure volute krater attributed


to a painter of the Syleus sequence!
Maynard, you shouldnt have!

George Booth (11/29/1999)

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872

antique antiques art artists artsy box collectors couple foot gift gifts history holidays husbands inside just krater circle kraters mansion marriage obscure opened painter painters people relationships rich staircase vase vases volute wealthy woman 16571 8

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (11/29/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

873

business captionless cents chain charts choice choosing clothing diagrams diphtheria dont dressed dysentery ethics events examine fashion forget garment getting guts have hour hate label labels made mens mexico thailand morning multiple one people politics probably put read realize results see shirt stupid sweatshops three was where while worse earned yankee 165719

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You need a transplant, but there are very


few good parts for middle-aged women.

Leo Cullum (11/29/1999)

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874

acting age doctor doctors examination finding fitness general get health hollywood life m.d. medical medicine middle modern movies not nurse odds off organs parts patients physician plays roles shortage soon surgeon surgery tells transplants well woman 165720

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I wish youd get into the spirit of this thing, Brewster!

Gahan Wilson (11/29/1999)

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875

annoyed appreciate asking cell condemned convict correctional crime criminals death escape escorting ethics execution executions facility gravity guards happily incarcerate incarcerated incarceration jail man penalty prison prisoners prisons situation smiling spirit two warden 165721

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Please be patient with me, Christopher.


The arts are an important part of my life!

Edward Koren (11/29/1999)

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876

above apartment art artist artistic artwork beatniks block float general hippies humanities ideas longhaired man muses music musicians plastic problems theatre theatre oratory them woman writers writers writing 165722

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

This sance may be monitored and recorded for quality-control purposes.

Michael Maslin (11/29/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

877

ball crystal customer disclaimer fortune general gypsy into life line modern parlor peer phone predict prediction pseudo-science quality-control sance service technology telephones tellers 165723

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Loved our evening, Lou. Thanks for being rich.

Michael Crawford (11/29/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

878

being class daddies daddy dares date dating digger fashionable gold hungry limo man men money older opulence people relationships rich sugar upper wealth wealthy woman women 165724

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

As we all know, the Christmas party is coming up.


Are we all thinking about fun spaces?

Richard Cline (11/29/1999)

Return to Main Menu 3

879

board boss business chairmen christmas cocktail collar corporate employee employer employment events executives four fun gatherings general holidays leisure meeting meetings members men mingling occupation office offices parties party presents profession professional season social socializing think thinking white woman work 165725

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You cant keep living in the past.


Maybe its time you started killing other people.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (11/29/1999)

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880

advises burial cemeteries cemetery crime dark death divorce ethics friend funeral grave graveyard humor husband husbands kill killed killer live living meet meeting mourning murder murderer not plot stands tomb tombstone wake widow woman 165726

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Careful, kiddo. A lot of junk mail looks first class.

Charles Barsotti (11/29/1999)

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881

bar barroom bars bartender beer booze class drinking envelope envelopes fake fakes female first flirtations fraud general house junk leisure letter letters life love mail men modern office pickups post postage postal postman psychology pub public relationships scenes tavern two women 165727

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its the millennium, so maybe we should plan


something special for New Years Eve.

Jack Ziegler (12/6/1999)

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882

celebrate celebrating celebration cell convict convicts correctional crime criminals discuss escape facility general holidays incarcerate incarcerated incarceration jail millennium plans prison prisoners special their two y2kholiday 165728

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If there is anyone who objects to this union, either here or


on the Internet, speak now or forever hold your peace.

John Caldwell (12/6/1999)

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883

cameras ceremonies ceremony computers general hats head live minister novelty over performs piece technology television webcam webcams wedding weddings 165729

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Stop complaining. Who isnt broke?

Marisa Acocella (12/6/1999)

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884

bags broke complain complaining consumerism down expensive fashion fashionable loaded money people rich shopping stores two women young 165730

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Cheney (12/6/1999)

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885

all around brokers computer computers falling geek globe globes inside instead internet market money sits snow stock stocks 165731

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ill say a normal word, then you say the first


sick thing that pops into your head.

J.C. Duffy (12/6/1999)

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886

activity association couch crazy does duffy insane insanity normal patient problems psychiatrists psychologists psychology psychotherapist sanity sick therapist therapy word 165732

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

No, we are not twins.

Marisa Acocella (12/6/1999)

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887

age aisle baskets gay glasses holding homosexuals identical life look-alikes looking men modern shopping supermarket supermarkets talking twins two wearing woman 165733

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

It was just that one time that you won the Nobel Prize, wasnt it, dear?

Mort Gerberg (12/6/1999)

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888

award chair discusses friend general honor husband husbands husbands marriage medal newspaper once one pipe relationships seats wife 165734

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

All these people you invited


are they friends or just inventory?

Richard Cline (12/6/1999)

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889

cliche cliches cocktail events expressions gatherings introductions language leisure man mingling parties party play relationships social socializing talking two women word words 165735

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/6/1999)

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890

arithmetic benches best blinds books bread bucks buy change children clean couple english experiment find four general get go grimy grocery guide home homeschooling hours house kid leave lessons like long make math mathematics milk observe pack park parks part people read reading return right room scenes school schooling schools science social staying store stores studies sure tareytons teachers ten them till tv venetian way 165736

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Unfortunately, my crime spree occurred just before


todays level of incompetence set in at the F.B.I.

Jack Ziegler (12/6/1999)

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891

above armed bureau bureaucracy cell convict correctional crime crimes criminals discuss discussing escape facility federal guard incarcerate incarcerated incarceration incompetents inmates investigation jail prison prisoners them two watchtower yard 16573 7

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Gosh, I wish somebody would tell me to take early retirement.

Charles Barsotti (12/6/1999)

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892

age been businessmen early envies executive fire firing general just management older retired retirement tells unemployment young 165738

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I know hes in here somewhere!

Gahan Wilson (12/6/1999)

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893

around babies baby baptise baptism baptismal baptisms both ceremony children churches clergy clergyman drown drowning fishing font hands incompetents infant missing priest religion religious somewhere water 165739

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (12/6/1999)

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894

above accidents assembly days factories general group gun guns hardhatted job line lines making on-the-job postal reads shoot shooting shot sign signs violence weapon weapons widgets without workers 165740

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If it slows down, just ask my father about the murder


he always swears he did not commit.

William Hamilton (12/6/1999)

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895

brings cocktail conversation crime criminals date dates death dinner family fathers kill killer murder murderer parents parties party relationships slow social woman young 165741

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its not just me, Dad. Amazon.com has never made a cent, either.

Robert Weber (12/6/1999)

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896

any discuss dollar earn failed failure father fathers internet life make modern money multibillion people problems profit refers rich son sons startup wealthy web website which yet 165742

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Purchase or lease?

Bernard Schoenbaum (12/6/1999)

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897

approaches automobiles autos car cars children cliche cliches consumerism drive driving expressions father full-size general language lease play refers sale salesman salesmen shopping son store stores toy toys word words 165743

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/6/1999)

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898

all chast children general grain home internet links page pages related roz sand shows topics universe welcome 165744

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (12/13/1999)

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899

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1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were about ready to play Meet Your Maker, but,


first, lets meet the recently deceased.

Michael Maslin (12/13/1999)

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900

afterlife angel angels appear called cliche cliches compete death expressions game gates guests halo heaven heavenly hosted language meet pearly peter play show shows television three wings word words 165747

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were still a damn good race when it comes to catching a cab.

William Hamilton (12/13/1999)

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901

around being cabs cats club clubs controversy ethnicity fat four get group groups meetings members mens minorities obstacles organizations over people problems race racism racist recent refers rich sitting stop taxis them unable urban 165748

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

But were not homeless. Were on a camping trip.

David Sipress (12/13/1999)

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902

bag bedraggled beggar beggars box bum bums camping city confronted cop corner environment general giuliani hobo hobos homeless homelessness landscape landscapes life mayor nature new outdoor outdoors people police poor poverty quality rudolph sleeping street tramp tramps two york 165749

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mort Gerberg (12/13/1999)

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903

bells church dame fitness guys gym gyms health hunchback notre other pull quasimodo rings weightlifting weights while 165750

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Maybe you could make the hunter more likable.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (12/13/1999)

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904

acting art artist artwork cavemen critic critical criticism director general hunting likable like liked liking one other painted publishers scene two wall writers 165751

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/13/1999)

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905

bitch cap caps child classroom cliche cliches corner dunce education expressions in just language play pupil says school schoolroom schools sits stool student students teach teacher teachers teaching wears word words world 165752

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Bad sex! Bad, bad, bad sex!

Danny Shanahan (12/13/1999)

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906

animals bedroom being best canines cliche cliches dog doggie dogs expressions female friend general language lover male man's pet pets play pooch puppies puppy scenes scolds sex talking word words 165753

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

His life was hanging by a thread,


and then somebody fed him the bean burrito.

Frank Cotham (12/13/1999)

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907

attempts bean bereaved burial burrito cause cemetery comfort cuisine death doctor doctors food funeral general grave graveyard hospital hospitals husbands low medical mourning plot room tomb tombstone waiting wake weeping woman 165754

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its good for my image.

Charles Barsotti (12/13/1999)

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908

another behind cliche cliches dog dogs expressions general health highness image king language majesty master mediaeval medieval monarch monarchy one owner pet pets play pooper regal royal royalty ruler sanitation scooper sire trails walking word words 165755

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

My only regret in life is that I never had a brainchild.

Leo Cullum (12/13/1999)

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909

babies brainchild businessmen career children cliche cliches executives expressions general ideas intelligence language office play regret smart two women word words 165756

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Were in H.M.O.sthe closest to legit weve been in years.

Bernard Schoenbaum (12/13/1999)

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910

business crime criminal criminals crook doctors gang gangster gangsters general guys health insurance latest legal mafia mob mobster mobsters os restaurant rob robber robbery talk their thief thievery thieves ventures wise 165757

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Alex Gregory (12/13/1999)

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911

askance baseball beer bring brother brother-in-law cans cap daughter daughters day downs drinking fitness general law looks man national office smokes t-shirt work workers 165758

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Is this it? Are we going to spend the rest of our lives flailing
around in the growing gap between rich and poor?

William Hamilton (12/13/1999)

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912

around back bottle class economics fights flailing glass holding man marital middle money people relationships rich sits stands table wife wine 165759

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Dont knock over the frozen embryos.

J.B. Handelsman (12/13/1999)

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913

babies donors egg embryos food freezer frozen general husband husbands infertility not refrigerators reproductive rummages technology through warns wife 165760

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Now that Ive wiped him out, I kind of miss


the little peg-legged bastard.

Gahan Wilson (12/13/1999)

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914

ahab alongside captain characters dick fictional harpoons herman literature melville miss missing moby other reminiscing stuck swims whale whales 165761

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

George Booth (12/13/1999)

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915

carols christmas claus frankenstein frankensteins general halloween hat holidays igor lyrics monster monsters presents santa season sing song wearing 165762

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Medoff (12/13/1999)

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916

box bureaucrat cathedral cliche cliches executives expressions inski language office outski play red regional russia russian square st vasily view word words 165763

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter C. Vey (12/20/1999)

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917

alcohol alcoholic alcoholism approaches army beggars bell blood captionless christmas claus dont drink drinking drunk for general give have holding i inebriated intoxicated liquor man money please poor reads: reindeer ringing salvation santa santas sell sidewalk sign signs so street to wine winter 165764

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Robert Mankoff (12/20/1999)

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918

boss build businessmen captionless damn davis desk employee general images inertia just lazing mental momentum office offices pick starting thinking was workers yells 165765

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Get some of the firms other deadwood and form a carolling group.

Leo Cullum (12/20/1999)

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919

board boss business businessmen carollers chairmen christmas claus collar corporate deadwood employee employer employment executives expendable general holidays members occupation office other presents profession professional santa season singing song songs tells white work 165766

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Sorry Im late. I had a bug.

Mort Gerberg (12/20/1999)

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920

arrives baby because bug cliche cliches computer computers day expressions father illness internet language late new play sick sickness time word words y2k year years 165767

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I always wondered who got my transplant.

Gahan Wilson (12/20/1999)

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921

cliche cliches cocktail events expressions female gatherings gender head heads introductions language leisure male man medical medicine meets men mingling parties party play sexes social socializing transplant woman women word words 165768

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

And will you, Lee, take Mimi for


granted as long as you both shall live.

William Hamilton (12/20/1999)

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922

affection anglican bride catholic ceremonies ceremony christian churches cliche cliches domestic episcopal expressions groom language lawfully-wedded love marriage marry matrimony men minister ministers nuptial performs play propose protestant relations relationships religion romance taken wed wedding weddings wife women word words 165769

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I was once a very beautiful woman, but forty years of


reading the Times has taken its toll.

Robert Weber (12/20/1999)

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923

age bar bars baseball beautiful cap drinking elderly end general haggard heavily journalism life made-up man medial modern new newspapers other robert talking times weber women york 165770

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You people make me sick. Nonetheless, heres a little toe-tapper.

J.C. Duffy (12/20/1999)

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924

cliche cliches concert disgusted duffy entertainment expressions instrument introduces language leisure man music musical musician musicians next number onstage performance performers piano pianos play sick singing song toe-tapper word words 165771

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/20/1999)

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925

absence adult adults age all attending captionless childhood cold conjugal could daughter dinner doesnt duties ear elderly evening excuse excused feel fever full general her household hurting letters notes novel office parents parts party please practice psychology running she sincerely soccer sons tasks text their this title today tonight twenty-four-hour various virus well what workers working 165772

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Its so silly. Now I cant even remember why I killed him.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (12/20/1999)

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926

after carpet crime dark ethics fights friend general having humor husbands just kill legs life living man marital men modern murder phone police relationships remember room silly visible woman women 165773

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Only time will tell whether this


merger makes sense or not.

Peter Steiner (12/20/1999)

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927

ancient business businessmen corporate driver executive greek history look makes men merge mergers row sense ship ships side slave slavery slaves suits 165774

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If were being honest, it was your decision to follow my


recommendations that cost you money.

Leo Cullum (12/20/1999)

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928

banking brokers businessmen client decision defends ethics himself honest investments lawyer lawyers market money office recommendations stock stockbroker stocks 165775

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I got marriedI finally realized Im event-driven.

Richard Cline (12/20/1999)

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929

affection announces apartment bride businessmen ceremonies ceremony cliche cliches couple domestic event-driven expressions groom language life love man marriage marry matrimony modern nuptial play propose realize relations relationships romance sit terrace urban wed wedding weddings word words 165776

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh, look, dearcrimes back!

Danny Shanahan (12/20/1999)

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930

armed back being break-in city crime criminal criminals crook ethics general gun gunpoint hold holdups husband mug mugged mugger mugging new rob robber robbery shops street thief thieves up urban while window woman york 165777

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We found the spare key under the welcome mat.

Frank Cotham (12/20/1999)

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931

angry castle class enter horde key keys king mat medieval monarchy peasants poor rich room royalty sitting throne times warefare welcome where 165778

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

All this talk of Viagra and penile implants reminds


me of a charming story about my own penis.

Jack Ziegler (12/20/1999)

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932

age couples dining dinner friends health house life medical medicine men middle modern parties penile restaurant sex stories story technology two 165779

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do your owners treat you well? Mine are very kind.

J.B. Handelsman (12/20/1999)

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933

building business capitol coming down ethics general kind life lobbies lobbyists politicians modern owners political politicians politics steps two washington 165780

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

But why cant we question authority together?

Barbara Smaller (12/20/1999)

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934

asks authority beatniks bond bonding catch cliches families father fathers hippies life messy modern phrases question relationship relationships room slogans son sons teen-agers teenage together 165781

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

You tell me if the roast beef is fresh.

Harry Bliss (12/20/1999)

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935

bleeding butcher butchers children cliche cliches coat cows cows demonstrate expressions food fresh fur general head holds how language meat mothers play shopping son stores woman word words 165782

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Your Honor, has anyone ever told you what


a wry, sensuous mouth you have?

Michael Crawford (12/20/1999)

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936

comment counsel lawyer courtroom flirtations homosexuals judges judges lawyers love makes male mouths pickups provocative scenes sensuous sex sexually shape wry 165783

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Do you have any idea who it is youre talking to?

Peter C. Vey (12/20/1999)

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937

bathrooms businessmen cellular ego idea life man men mens modern phone room stands talk talking technology telephones third urinal 165784

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Matthew Diffee (12/20/1999)

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938

arthur behind big businessmen captionless christmas desk during ego ethics executives face fortunate general hands head holiday holidays jeffries less little man money mr people poor rich season smile takes think thinking thinks those time 165785

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I come from the future.

David Sipress (12/20/1999)

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939

age aged balding belly businessmen but clothes encounters fiction future general look-alikes man men middle pot same science self time travel wearing 165786

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Victoria Roberts (12/20/1999)

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940

bags below christmas consumerism days descends down incline life malls marked modern reading roberts shopping signs ski skiing skis stores victoria woman women 165787

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What if my inner demons want to write about bunnies?

Alex Gregory (12/27/1999)

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941

arms artists bottle bunnies childishness cigarettes computer computers crossed girlfriend husbands inner male near standing wine writer writers 165789

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Jack Ziegler (12/27/1999)

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942

bed bedroom bill books choice choices clinton control copy foolish gail general hand hillary hillarys household husband husbands marriage men out passed pres reads relationships remote scenes sheehy sleeping smart washington woman women 165790

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter C. Vey (12/27/1999)

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943

christmas cooler coolers general holidays jug management melted new office play reading seasons sign snow snowman snowmen something two water which winter word workers 165791

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Mick Stevens (12/27/1999)

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944

authors bestseller book books bookstore bookstores bookworms box cash consumerism labelled language literature manuscript next play publishing puns reading register shopping stores word worms writers writing 165792

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

If you would, Peter, please stand and point to


the person you know as Mr. McGregor.

Michael Maslin (12/27/1999)

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945

animals attorney beatrix books box children courtroom courtrooms defendants judges lawyers legal potter prosecuting rabbit rabbits scenes stories telling victims witness 165793

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Oh no, not homework again.

Arnie Levin (12/27/1999)

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946

animals basset bowls children complain dogs education food general homework hounds restaurants schools talking their two 165794

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Shaw (12/27/1999)

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947

authors bestseller block book books cell chicken cliche cliches criminally expressions insane language legs life literature manuscript modern play prisoner prisoners prisons publishing reads self-help shackles soup trends word words writers writing 165795

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Something this big.

Gahan Wilson (12/27/1999)

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948

big food general gluttony how huge man mouth much open restaurants service tells waiter waiters wants 165796

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Youve been charged with driving under the influence of testosterone.

William Haefeli (12/27/1999)

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949

alcohol automobiles cars charges cliche cliches courtroom defendants drinking dwi expressions female gender -general judge judges language male males man masculinity men play police rage road sexes steroids testosterone -traffic unshaven violations word words 165797

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

What do you think sitting around being bored out of your


mind will be like in the new millennium?

Robert Mankoff (12/27/1999)

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950

bored boredom fights general husband living marital marriage men millennium relationships room sit sitting their wife women y2k years 165798

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Tom Hachtman (12/27/1999)

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951

authors bestseller book books celebrities general health hernia huge injured injury king kings lining literature manuscript muscle new publishing pull stephen stomach tear trends writers writing 165799

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Michael Crawford (12/27/1999)

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952

comedians cuisine diners diving entertainment general goggles kastle king krab lobsters look low men mike night open open-tank restaurants sals -seafood skin snorkels submerged tanks wearing 165800

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Hi. Im Wendell, Jr. Im six and Im fully invested.

Bernard Schoenbaum (12/27/1999)

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953

another boy boys brokers businessman children class cliche cliches club clubs expressions father general introduced introductions investments language market mens money opulence people play rich small sons stock upper wealth wealthy word words 165801

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Havent you got anything a little more, like, ironic?

William Hamilton (12/27/1999)

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954

anything boy children clerk fashion ironic irony mother shoe shoes shopping teen-agers trends 165802

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Roz Chast (12/27/1999)

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955

advertising also artists author book books bother bought captured cover did dont either forgotten general hard ignored lousy marketing naturally one out print publishers sell the their this times titles unadvertised whose why writers 165803

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Id better bring in my plants.

Frank Cotham (12/27/1999)

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956

barbarians beard bed blazing century deep dog doorway falling fire fireplace gardening huge hurricane lamp man nature outside plants russia russian scene seasons snow snuggled stands storms weather winter woman 165804

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Peter Steiner (12/27/1999)

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957

bible books bookstore bookstores commandments edition first holds man stone tablets ten 165805

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Trophy husbands.

Marisa Acocella (12/27/1999)

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958

animals general greed heads hunting husband husbands living marriage men mens mounted people relationships rich room stuffed three trophies trophys wall womans women 165806

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Ive cleaned out the garagenow may I file for divorce?

Victoria Roberts (12/27/1999)

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959

asks chores clean cleaning divorce fights finished garage general hes household husbands just man marital marriage men relationships since wife women 165807

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

They never should have allowed us to be free-range.

Benita Epstein (12/27/1999)

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960

agriculture animals antarctica arctic background bemoan birds chickens cliche cliches expressions farming free free-range ice language marketing penguins play pole range sheet south stand status talking their two word words 165808

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

William Steig (12/27/1999)

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961

angel angels battle beelzebub body devil devils evil good legends man myths play religion small steig title tug war william wst 165809

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Shes registered at Salomon Smith Barney.

Mort Gerberg (12/27/1999)

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962

bear bonds bride brokerage brokers bull ceremonies ceremony diamond dollar domestic economy engaged engagement finance firm friends general groom investments leisure market marriage marry matrimony money nuptial nyse parties party propose registered ring stock stocks street tells wall wed wedding weddings woman 165810

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Try falling down and scraping your knee.


Then you can talk to me about pain.

Bruce Eric Kaplan (12/27/1999)

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963

children general girls knee little living pain room talk talking two 165811

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I think what I miss most is robbing people.

David Sipress (12/27/1999)

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964

cell crime crimes criminals discussing ethics miss prison prisoners prisons robbing thieves two 165812

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

We believe that in a former life she was an editor.

Sam Gross (12/27/1999)

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965

animals authors beat beatniks bestseller book books cat cats chair claws easy editors family furniture general generation hippies household literature manuscript pets publishing punks reincarnation watches writers writing 165788

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

Funny, funny, funny, but were going


to pass on How to Drink and Drive.

Robert Mankoff (12/27/1999)

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966

accidents alcohol alcoholic alcoholism artists authors automobiles autos bestseller book books car cars drink drinking drive driving drunk dwi editors entitled general how inebriated intoxicated liquor literature manuscript police publisher publishers publishing rejects traffic writers writing 165813

1999

THE COMPLETE CARTOONS OF THE NEW YORKER

I start every diet with the best intentions, but it goes


to hell as soon as I sense blood in the water.

Charles Barsotti (12/27/1999)

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967

animals best blood dieting diets eat eating environment fish fitness health ocean predator shark sharks swimming talking two 165814

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