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Legalization of Same Gender Relationship

According to oxford dictionary, relationship is an emotional and sexual affection between

two people or the way in which two or more people or things are connected, or the state of
being connected; meanwhile homosexuality is attraction between two people of same gender.
Oxford also stated that legalization is to make something that previously illegal permissible by
law. In other words, legalize is to make lawful or legal or to confirm or validate. Based on Lipka
(2015) Netherlands is the first country to legalize same-sex marriages which start in December
2000 followed by Belgium in 2003.The legislation gave same-sex couples the right to marry,
divorce and adopt children (Lipka, 2015). Since then, there are 18 countries that legalize gay
marriage (Sarkar and Torre, 2015). Malaysian UMNO representative, Mohammad (2013) said
that a research has found that 3 out of 10 men in Malaysia are engage in same gender affair.
From the statement, it shows that lesbians and gay men are increasingly in number and becoming
a serious problem in Malaysia. This problem occurs due to some causes such as gender identity,
lesbians and gays parents, and social and culture. Gender identity refer to the inner self concept
of person as a female, male or both. In other words it is the consciousness of a person toward
themselves on what they see and called themselves as. While sexual orientation refer to oneself
nature or their psychological identification which is woman, man, or other gender that may or
may not same as their sex birth. Hansen (2009) said that 14% of children raised by homosexual
parents develop homosexual or bisexual preferences since parents are the primary influencers of
a child. Culture shapes the idea of what behaviors of a man and a woman are appropriate thus it
is play a large part in ones sexual preferences as culture defines acceptable behavior. The
legalization of same sex marriage has been an issue for decades. The arguments for legalizing
same sex marriage are consistently different in each country. Based on the topic, the same gender
relationship should not be legalized due to destruction of family, caused harm not only for the
institution of the marriage itself but also destroy the society, and incompatible with the beliefs in
major religion of the world.

The first argument against legalization of same gender relationship is obviously the
destruction of family. According to Oxford dictionary family is a group that consist of parent and

their children that living together. Abbot who against same sex marriage said that same sex
relationship do not naturally produce children but he cannot disagree that marriage is about
child-raring, or the child interest since gay couples are perfectly willing and able to raise children
(Wilder,2014). Is the love enough? Hansen (2009) does not think that love is enough to raise
children. She wrote that children need five things to develop correctly. One is that children
require mother-love and father-love. The second is that children develop through a certain stages
during which they need a mother, and other stages when they need a father. Third, children
require an opposite sexed parent to help them moderate their own gender linked inclinations.
Next, same sex marriage wile increase sexual uncertainty and sexual experimentation by
adolescent. Lastly, if same sex marriage is allowed then other types of marriages such as
polyandrous would have to be allowed and this situation may leading to more confusion in the
lives of the children. Sprigg (2011) said that if same sex marriage are legalize, the number of
birth rates will decline and also fewer children would be raised by a married mother and father.
Sprigg also state that the most terrible impact resulting from the legalization of same gender
marriage would not be its effect on adults but its effect on children. Children that raised by a
married couple consist of a mother and a father may experience lower rates of social pathologies,
including health, emotional, and behavioral problems or poverty. Sprigg also state that research
survey which primarily regarding lesbians in an American Sociological Review article in 2001,
found that children of lesbians are less likely to conform to traditional gender norms, children of
lesbians are more likely to engage in homosexual behavior, daughters of lesbians are more
sexually adventurous and less chaste , and lesbian co-parent relationships are more likely to
break up than heterosexual marriages. Children both sons and daughters will suffer if they live
without a father or a mother. The evidence that supports this statement is that research has shown
that youth imprisonment risks in a national male cohort were rise for adolescents in father-absent
households while among daughters, father absence was strongly correlate with elevated risk for
early sexual activity and adolescent pregnancy. Even researchers who are support same gender
parenting have had to admit that children raised in fatherless families from infancy, while closer
to their mothers, perceived themselves to be less cognitively and physically competent than their
peers from father-present families. Even granting marriage-related benefits to same-sex couples
is associated with low birth and fertility rates. There are sixteen states which offer at least some
recognition or benefits to same-sex relationships. Twelve of these sixteen states rank in the

bottom twenty states in birth rate, while eleven of them rank in the bottom seventeen in fertility
rate. Vermont, the first state in the U. S. to offer 100% of the rights and benefits of marriage to
same-sex couples through passage of its civil unions law in 2000, ranks dead last in both birth
rate and fertility rate (Sprigg, 2011). In addition, Sheldon (2002) the Chairman of the Traditional
Values Coalition stated that a man who molests a preteen or teenage boy is engaging in
homosexual behavior while Daily (2004) said that 1 to 3 percent of the population that is
sexually attracted to the same sex are committing the sex crimes against children. Thus by
allowing the child adoption of gay parents may increase the risk of incidents of child sexual
abuse. Therefore, it is obvious that legalizing the same-sex relationship diminish the society in
terms of family.

The second argument that can be discussed is by allowing gay marriage; it will likely to
cause harm not only for the institution of the marriage itself but also destroy the society. It is
because, if society permits the same-sex marriage; then disallowing polygamous, incestuous, and
other non-traditional relationship will be deemed as discriminatory. The founder and also the
Chairman of Focus on the family who is Dobson (2005) predicted that once the same-sex
marriage being legalize, then automatically will enabling other group marriage such as marriage
between daddies and little girls, and marriage between a man and his donkey. Besides, the
Senior Fellow for Policy Studies at the Family Research Council believe that if gay marriage
being legalize, most of the community especially the consumers, businesses, and taxpayers will
be forced to support financially the homosexual relationships (Sprigg, 2011). The institution of
marriage which is the traditional or normal marriage between a man and a woman had been
endangered that proved by the higher rate of divorce that statistically 40-50%. Simon Fellow in
Religion and Society at The Heritage Foundation Free, said recent decades, marriage has been
undermined by the view that a further review of the needs of adults' from the child's needs. When
same-sex marriage is included in the redefining marriage thus it is the peak of the revisionism
and emotional intensity is the only thing that make marriage different from others (Anderson,
2013). Hawkins and Carroll (2014) agreed on the fact that legalization of same-sex marriage
will completely destroyed the gender as the main thing in the social institution of marriage. Truth
is same-sex marriage is not the relationship class that does not change the basic traditional

marriage but will effect a fundamental change in its meaning. The behavior of the marriage will
completely change as the changing of its meaning. Marriage is known as institution and play role
in the society but once its changed due to legalize of same-sex marriage then it will diminish the
base of marriage and fatherhood to heterosexual men, weakening their connection to marriage
and to the children they possibly father. The most crucial component in definition of marriage is
the gender and to add in it is important towards on how marriage produces its benefits for
children and society. They also state that sociologist Christopher Carrington who doing
ethnographic study of fifty-two gay and lesbian couples in San Francisco Bay area have found
that one person specialize in domesticity in seventy-five percent of the couple, which that as
the relationship longer the tendency to specialize also increasing. Carrington, who not comparing
the same-sex couples with the different-sex couples concluded that homo families tend to have
higher economic pressure to maximize household income when their partners does not having
higher earning potential assume that more of the domestic chores. From all the evidences, it
shows that legalizing same-sex relationship or marriage does the institution of the marriage itself
and destroy the society.

The last argument, it is obvious that gay relationship is contradict to the word of god and
irreconcilable with the beliefs in major religion beliefs in the worlds thus making the act of
homosexuality as immoral and unnatural. Marriage has commonly defined as relationship
between men and women as according to Harvey (year). The bible are against any sexual affair
except between a husband and a wife and mentions that sexual intercourse between persons of
the same sex are prohibited. As mention in Leviticus 20:13 if a man lies with a man as one lies
with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. The must be put to death; their blood
will be on their own heads,(American Academy of Pediatrics, 1993). Cristofaro and Wilkinson
(2003) said that the late Catholic priest wrote in July 2009 that "Throughout the history of the
human race the institution of marriage has been understood as the complete spiritual and bodily
communion of one man and one woman," as mention in Matthew 19:4-5 Have you not read
that he who created them from the beginning made them male and a female, therefore a man
shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife thus the two become one flesh.
Barber, Associate Dean for Online Programs at Liberty University School of Law, stated that

every person that engaged in the same sex gender relationship lifestyle, who has adopted a
homosexual identity knows that what they're doing is immoral, unnatural, and self-destructive,
but they still thirst for that pledge. Pulella (2012) said that a set of guidelines by Pope John Paul
II mention that there are no grounds for considering gay relationship unions to be in any way
similar to God's plan for marriage and family since marriage is holy, while homosexual acts is
against natural and moral law. Pope Benedict stated in 2012 that gay marriage threatened the
future of humanity itself. In the Islamic tradition, several hadith condemn gay and lesbian
relationships including the saying "When a man mounts another man, the throne of God shakes,"
and "Sihaq [lesbian sex] of women is zina [illegitimate sexual intercourse]." In Islam, the sexual
act between the couple of similar sex is sinful but if a person transform the desire of the
homosexuality into a struggle and challenge to overcome it and not physically commit it, that
person will get reward from it. From the facts stated that both Islam and Christians opposing the
act of same sex relationship thus by legalizing same gender marriage will against the belief of
religion. Relationship or marriage that made of from the two persons which having the same-sex
gender clearly not normal, so by legalizing same-sex marriage is same as disobey the creator
who made a male and female to be together and it is not natural.

However, American psychological Association adopted the following official policy

statement on 2004 stated that there are no scientific evidence that lesbian and gay parents
influence the sexual identities including gender role behavior and sexual orientation of the
adopted child and the development is the same as much as children of heterosexual parents.
Hansen (2009) stated that homosexual couples can be as loving as heterosexual couple in terms
of loving toward children. Guindon (2003) wrote in an article Intolerance and Psychopathology:
Toward a General . Some of those supporter that support same-sex marriage because they
believe it offers beneficial long-term impact on children Diagnosis for Racism, Sexism and
Homophobia that homophobia is a personality disorder that deserves full acknowledgement as a
psychological problem if it is engage in such harmful behaviors. Another than that, the claims
that homosexuals abuse children at a higher rate are based on the false belief and in fact less than
one percent of the child molester were lesbian and gay (Cahill and Jones, 2004). On another
article titled Are Children at Risk for Sexual Abuse by Homosexual, 82% of the sexual child

abuse cases, the offender is heterosexual partner of a close relative (Jenny, 1994). There are lot
argumentation about same-sex gender in many website which provide evidence related what they
are talking about until there are community that support the same-sex marriage and anti-samesex marriage. Their opinions should be contradict with each other, when supporting the same-sex
marriage they surely will talk about the good things which showing they are supporting this type
of community. But still, is same-sex marriage provide the normality of society, providing the best
or healthy condition not only the physical also mental or emotion especially to the children, and
does it obeyed the creator ? Logically, it is still unacceptable for two person that same-sex gender
being or living together as married couple.

In conclusion, same gender relationship cannot or should not be legalize due to

destruction of family, caused harm not only for the institution of the marriage itself but also
destroy the society, and contrary to the word of god and is incompatible with the beliefs in major
religion beliefs in the worlds thus making the act of homosexuality as immoral and unnatural. As
Hanson and Sprigg said; gay parenting affects mostly to the children not the one who practices it.
As the definition from Oxford dictionary that family is not about the parents but including the
children. However, biologically children cannot be produce with the same-sex partner
(Wilder,2014). To sum up from Hansen (2009), children should be provided with five thing to
develop correctly that are related to the images of father and mother with love, stages of growing
up, and no confusion with the life of the children. Sprig (2011) also believes that the couples
would not have the most impact as they have their capability but the children having the most
impacts such as children health, emotion, and behavioral. In addition, the institution of marriage
is not pure anymore as Dobson (2005) have predicted the enabling of marriage of other types of
group. The basic foundation of marriage is being destroyed by the legalization same-sex
relationship (Hawkins & Carroll, 2014). In any religion, clearly that in the beginning of the life
God have created man and woman that called Adam and Hawa to have lots children but God not
created woman and woman or man and man thus it is really disobeyed the religion and beyond
nature. As Pullela(2012) said that marriage is holy and homosexual is immoral and not natural.
From all the evidences provided again the same gender relationship should not be legalized
because of the bad impacts toward the family, institution of the marriage and society, also the

beliefs in major religion of the world. In other words, it is completely disagree about the topic on
legalizing same-sex relationship.