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Keeping Anger Under Control

MORE than 2,000 years ago, the Greek philosopher Aristotle used the term catharsi
s to describe the purging or release of emotional tension that results from viewing
a tragic play or drama. The idea was that after one s tension is released, a sens
e of psychological refreshment would emerge.
Early in the last century, the Austrian neurologist Sigmund Freud promoted a sim
ilar view. He claimed that if people bottled up or repressed their negative emot
ions, they would later resurface as a psychological disorder, such as hysteria.
Thus, Freud maintained that you should express anger rather than restrain it.
In more recent years, researchers who tested the catharsis theory throughout the
70 s and 80 s found little or no support to back it up. These findings led psychologi
st Carol Tavris to write: It is time to put a bullet, once and for all, through [
the] heart of the catharsis hypothesis. The belief that observing violence (or ve
ntilating it ) gets rid of hostilities has virtually never been supported by resea
rch.
Another psychologist, Gary Hankins, said: Research shows that letting out all of yo
ur anger in a cathartic manner often leaves you feeling more uptight, not less. G
ranted, mental-health experts may never reach agreement on the issue of catharsi
s. However, many people have benefited from another source of wisdom, the Bible.
Let Anger Alone
The idea of controlling your anger is beautifully expressed by the Bible psalmis
t David. He said: Let anger alone and leave rage; do not show yourself heated up
only to do evil. (Psalm 37:8) The way to avoid saying or doing something that you
may later regret is to keep from getting heated up in the first place. Of course,
that is much easier said than done. But it can be done! Let s consider three ways
that you can get your anger under control.
Reduce Anger s Intensity
To reduce anger, slow down and relax. Try to avoid saying the first thing that c
omes to mind. If you feel yourself getting overly excited and feel you are in da
nger of losing control of your emotions, apply the Bible s counsel: The beginning o
f contention is as one letting out waters; so before the quarrel has burst forth
, take your leave. Proverbs 17:14.
That is what helped a man named Jack to gain mastery over his violent temper. Ja
ck s father was given to bouts of drunkenness and anger. While growing up, Jack de
veloped a violent personality as well. He says: When I became angry, I would feel
as if I was on fire. And I would lash out violently with words and fists.
However, things started to change when Jack began a study of the Bible with Jeho
vah s Witnesses. He came to understand that with God s help, he could change and lea
rn to control his anger. And change he did! Jack relates how he reacted when a f
ellow workmate swore at him in anger: I felt the surge of anger blaze through my
body. My first inclination was to grab him and throw him down.
What eventually helped Jack to remain calm? He explains: I remember praying, Pleas
e Jehovah, help me to calm down! Then, for the very first time, I felt a peace co
me over me, and I was able to walk away. Jack continued his study of the Bible. H
e spent much time in prayer and meditation on such scriptures as Proverbs 26:20,
which states: Where there is no wood the fire goes out. Afterward, Jack was final
ly able to gain mastery over his anger.
Learn to Relax
A calm heart is the life of the fleshly organism. (Proverbs 14:30) Applying this b
asic Bible truth can improve one s emotional, physical, and spiritual health. Star
t by learning simple relaxation methods, which help to reduce feelings of anger.
The following techniques have proved to be effective in combating stress-relate
d anger:
? Breathing deeply, which is one of the best and fastest ways to reduce the intensit
y of your anger.
? While breathing deeply, repeating a word or phrase that is calming to you, suc
h as relax,
let it go, or take it easy.
? Immersing yourself in something you enjoy perhaps reading, listening to music, g
ardening, or some other type of activity you find relaxing.
? Getting regular exercise and eating a healthful diet.

Adjust Your Expectations


You may not be able completely to avoid the people or the things that act as ang
er triggers, but you can learn to control your reactions to them. This involves
changing the way you think.
People with very high expectations tend to have greater problems with anger. Why
? Because when someone or something does not measure up to their high standards,
disappointment and anger quickly follow. To combat this perfectionist mentality
, it is good to keep in mind that there is not a righteous man, not even one ... Al
l men have deflected, all of them. (Romans 3:10,12) Therefore, we set ourselves up
for a sense of failure if we think that we or anyone else can be perfect.
We are wise not to expect too much of ourselves or others. The Bible says: We all
stumble many times. If anyone does not stumble in word, this one is a perfect m
an. (James 3:2) Yes, there is no man righteous in the earth that keeps doing good
and does not sin. (Ecclesiastes 7:20) So if we pretend to be something that we ar
e not perfect it will lead to a life filled with frustration and anger.
As imperfect humans, we all get angry from time to time. But how we express our
anger is a matter of choice. The apostle Paul cautioned fellow Christians: Be wra
thful, and yet do not sin; let the sun not set with you in a provoked state. (Eph
esians 4:26) Yes, by controlling our anger, we can express our feelings in a pos
itive way, a way that works for the benefit of everyone involved.
[Box/Pictures on pages8,9]
LEARN TO RELAX
Practice deep breathing
Immerse yourself in something you enjoy
Exercise regularly