What is Communication?

Communication is the sending and receiving of a

message. Communication can occur between one
or many different people.
Communication can take place within just one
individual. This type of communication is called
intrapersonal communication.

Interpersonal communication involves two or

more people.
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Types of Communication
Intrapersonal communication
refers to the conversation that is continually going
on in your own mind.
Interpersonal communication
refers to the different types of verbal, non-verbal
and physical actions or expressions that people use
when they communicate with each other.
Intrapersonal & Interpersonal
Mastering the two basic types of communication is
the key to successful socialization.
The ability to communicate ideas, thoughts and
feelings serves as the basis for all successful human
interaction.
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WHAT IS INTRAPERSONAL
COMMUNICATION?
Intrapersonal communication skills are:
communications that occur within a person's own mind.
positive internal dialogue, occurring within the mind. Meditation,
prayer, visualization and affirmations are amongst the intrapersonal
techniques.
the process of talking to oneself, we all have constant internal
dialogues going on within ourselves either consciously or
subconsciously, vital roles in determining our self-esteem and selfperception. If you apply yourself, it is improving your confidence and
therefore your quality of life.

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IMPORTANT FACTORS THAT INFLUENCE

INTRAPERSONAL SKILLS

1.Perspective
2.Self-esteem
3.Self-confidence
4.Self-assertive
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1.

PERSPECTIVE
Perspective is a view or belief which we truly
believe it is true and valuable in our life

Perspective is the way we look at things

Knowledge, understanding and values in our minds shape our perspectives or philosophies or
paradigms
IN RELATIONSHIP, IT IS BETTER TO BE KIND THAN TO BE RIGHT!

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THE WAY WE THINK

The way we think influence our perspectives in life

Positive thoughts will produce positive perspectives in life

Positive perspectives are able to produce positive actions

Positive perspectives are able to produce positive communication and

interpersonal relationship

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** BRIGHT STUDENT

KNOWLEDGE/INFORMATION

EDUCATION
OBSERVATION

EXPERIENCE /
EFFECTS WE SEE

WHAT IS SHAPING
OUR MINDS?

ENVIRONMENTAL
INFLUENCE
**PROCESSIONARY CATERPILLAR

PEOPLE
INFLUENCE

VALUE
SYSTEM
PERCEIVED
AUTHORITY

INFLUENCE OF
MODELING
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EVERY ACTION WE TAKE IS ACTUALLY

A REFLECTION OFOUR PERSPECTIVE

The Way We Use Our Time, Money And Energy

With Whom We Normally Socialize Or Get Along With
What Kind Of Food We Eat
What Kind Of Books We Read
What Kind Of Activities We Give Priorities
How We Communicate With People
How We React And Take Actions When We Are Facing
Difficulties And Problems
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2.

SELF-ESTEEM

HOW WE LOOK AT OURSELVES:

In a positive or negative manner
In the form of strengths or form of weaknesses..
With appreciating your capabilities or undermining
yourselves.
With the feeling you can be successful or weak without
energy.
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WHY HAVING HIGH SELF-ESTEEM IS IMPORTANT?

Solid and good self-esteem will give us strength to shape
our lives the best we can
Poor and bad self-esteem will lead to a lot of weaknesses
in life
WHO AM I?
The Answer To This Question Will Influence Ones Selfesteem And Influence The Actions We Take In Our Life

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WHO AM I?

MY IDENTITY! MY IMAGE!
I am a good human being.
I am a responsible person / son /
daughter/ student
I am a loving (/ son / daughter/
classmate/ student)

I am a useful member of this

society
I am a responsible and dedicated
student/ officer who is wellorganized
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WAYS TO BUILD HIGH SELF-ESTEEM

Always remember you have the capability, role and
achievement
Should interact with those who have positive minds and
who always encourage positive actions
Should take positive actions which bring goodness to
yourself and society

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3.

SELF-CONFIDENCE
HIGH SELF-CONFIDENCE will help us take actions
based on perspectives and values we hold
HIGH SELF-CONFIDENCE gives us strengths to
achieve the goals we set in our life

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BUILDING SELF-CONFIDENCE 1-3/9

1. You must feel that you are special used to be successful, have talent and capabilities,
used to contribute something meaningful to society
Do not feel that other people are too superior they are also normal human beings that
shouldnt be scared of
2. Must practice to give opinions even though you may make mistakes or you dont have
much points to say
Must try to get small things done until successful - because small success could lead in
getting bigger success
3. Must try to do high risk work which have big challenge so as to train yourself to fight
feeling of scared or no confidence

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BUILDING SELF-CONFIDENCE 4-6/9

4. When you have clear objectives, clear values, clear ways of doing things don't
worry about complaints, negative comments and opinions of other people go
ahead with your work do it the best possible way you can
5.Seek support from positive people, successful people, not those who are only
talkers, nothing accomplished, negative people who dont like to see other people
become successful.

6. Be careful in choosing friends do not be affected by the negative comments or

bad influence or bad models. Prolonged exposure to negative elements will
influence your mind and your soul and finally you will fall in their trap of
negativity and non-performance.

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BUILDING SELF-CONFIDENCE 7-9/9

7. Get yourself used to do a lot of welfare work to build strong mind,
soul and character so that this way you wont be easily influenced in
negativity or bad behavior you get yourselves more confidence and
becoming more useful.
8. Must try to fight feeling ashamed or scared or doesnt want to work
Do not propose other people to volunteer must propose your own
self to volunteer to take part
9. Must try to think and find creative ways to solve problems do not
surrender to circumstances

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4.

SELF-ASSERTIVE

The capability to take a stand and take appropriate actions in defending

perspectives and positive values which you strongly believe
Determination, patience and courage are the only things needed to improve any situation
WAYS TO BUILD SELF-ASSERTIVENESS
Understand clearly the good and bad aspects of anything
Be firm if they try to take advantage of you
Behold strictly to values, ethics and rules which you strongly believe

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CONCLUSION
Anthony Robbins: Communication Quotations
The way we communicate with others and with ourselves ultimately
determines the quality of our lives.
Winston Churchill: Communication Quotes
Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what
it takes to sit down and listen
Denis Waitley : Quotes: Self Esteem
To establish true self-esteem we must concentrate on our successes
and forget about the failures and the negatives in our lives

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ONLY WE CAN CHANGE OURSELVES

Nobody will be able to change us to get better results,

except we ourselves.
For things to change, we have to change first.

Good news: once we start changing ourselves, things will

start to change for us.
Our life is our responsibility, so we are responsible
totally for our life.

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INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION SKILLS

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DEFINITION OF
INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION
Communication is a process of
delivering a message or meaning
through verbal or non-verbal
means.

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PERSPECTIVE OF INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION

The Quality Of Our Interpersonal Communication Will
Determine The Quality Of Our Work And Quality Of
Our Life
Interpersonal Communication Skills Can Be Learned

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COMPONENTS OF INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

Conversation
Listening
Body language
Environment
Self-appearance
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1. CONVERSATION
Mention Their Names

Use Suitable Language

Tone Of Voice
Simplify Your Message
Give Other People The Chance To Talk And Do Not Control All
Try To Control From Telling Too Much About Yourself

Use Closed And Open Questions Properly

Contents Of Your Sentence
Suitability Of Topics To Talk

Winning Peoples Heart

Be Interesting Vs. Be Interested
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THE WAY TO CONVERSE

Be confident, cool and relaxed
Be yourself do not belittle yourself but at the same do
not be arrogant must show respect to all parties

Be assertive do not let other people step on your head

Give your opinion if you dont agree with full of
diplomacy and respect

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2.

LISTENING SKILLS

Look at the eyes and give attention But do not do it too close or too long

Show your interest and show that they are important

Concentrate do not let your mind wonder to other places. Do not look at other places or do other things
while listening to people talking to you
Show that you are actually listening to them with full interest by saying yeah oh like that, nodding your
head and continue eye contact.
Do not look at different direction
Ensure that you really understand what you have just heard by repeating what you have heard to him / her.

Repeat important information and seek confirmation from her Is this what you are trying say
Give encouragement for people to keep on talking or to tell you more using phrases such as thats amazing
idea, thats interesting story, please tell me more
Listen to ideas, not just words. Form imagination in your mind while listening.

Do not interrupt or try to finish his sentence while people are talking to you. Wait until he or she finishes his
or her sentences.
Do not be too fast to conclude. Give your response when you are truly sure hes finished his points.
Do not focus on what you are going to say, focus on what your friend is going to say first.

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3. BODY

LANGUAGE

PROPER BODY LANGUAGE

Smile or show happy face
Nod your head to show that you understand or agree or you are following the conversation
attentively.
Give space so that everyone can see each others face if you are talking in a group.
GOOD BODY LANGUAGE
Mirroring is you create the same body posture with those you are talking to if they are
standing with one leg up, you do the same, if they are holding cup, you do the same. This is
called mirroring.
Mirroring will create a more friendly and relaxed atmosphere between you and the other
person.
Avoid from:
Yawning,
Scratching your head,
Drilling your nostrils,
Digging your ears, and all sort of inappropriate actions
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. ENVIRONMENT

Try to understand their mood (are they tired, have many

problems, after getting scolded from their boss, feeling sad,
mixed feeling etc.)
Look at suitability of topic at that moment (talking about
marriage to women who havent got married, talking about
child birth with the couple who dont have kids yet etc.)
Find suitable place (eg. quite, not many people around) for
the topic you want to discuss. To discuss multi-million dollar
business deal, must find a suitable place.
Find suitable environment (cold, not smelly, refreshing, clean)
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5. SELF APPEARANCE
The way you dress
Cleanliness
Color of your dress
Ornaments
Body smell

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CHALLENGES IN COMMUNICATION
MISUNDERSTANDING IN COMMUNICATION
might happen in:
Through telephone
SMS
Emails
News delivered through third party
When talking always want to win or be superior
When talking, emotion is more than facts
When giving opinions, very fast in finding other peoples faults
When asking questions, the intention is to test the people
When talking, always want to make other people feel guilty
When talking, very arrogant, big talk and belittle other people.
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CHALLENGES IN COMMUNICATION
Normally, most people dont want the following:
ONE WAY COMMUNICATION do not give chance to other people to talk.
Pestered just like being pushy.

Dictated like to control.

Imposed give one-sided point of view.
Insisted do not give much choices.

Manipulation salesmen, bad leaders

He feel hes the only one whos right and other people do not know anything.
debating without proper guidelines, attack ones arguments, no ethics in discussion, no good
intention
Discussion not for the sake of finding proper understanding or to find the truths
Discussion to hurt other peoples feelings
Arguments just for fun no objective, waste of time hurt the feeling, no barakah
Provoke heated arguments, spoil the good mood, break friendship

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More examples of Barriers to

communication

Language
Values and beliefs
Sex/gender and age
Economic status
Educational level
Physical barriers
Attitude
Timing
Understanding of message
Trust
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IMPORTANT TIPS ON INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP

BASICS MANKIND
WANTS
To be respected
To be appreciated
To feel important

To play some roles

To be friends with others

Win-win enjoy their rights

BASICS MANKIND DO
NOT WANT
To be ridiculed
Belittled
Neglected
Segregated
Cruelled
Underestimated
Mistreated
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IMPORTANT TIPS ON INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP

1. REMEMBER HIS NAME AND RELATED INFORMATION
Remember his name correctly and mention his name in the conversation
Try to remember other important or relevant information about him such as the number of cats
he keep, countries he has visited, his favorite food etc.
2. LOOK AT THE GOOD SIDE AND GIVE EMPATHY
Look at the good side and strength he has; do not look at his weaknesses and shortcomings
Inculcate sympathy and empathy; try to understand his situation; do not quickly put a blame on
him; do not quickly make a conclusion about him and give forgiveness on small things
Investigate first on whats happened. Do not conclude too fast
Give open arms and put no ill intention toward him.
3. THINK WIN-WIN

Think win-win. Be fair to all parties.

Never ever suppress other people
Never try to take advantage, especially from the weaker party.

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IMPORTANT TIPS ON INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP

4. DO NOT KEEP HIDDEN AGENDA OR TRY TO TAKE ADVANTAGE
Do not keep the prawn besides the stone (hidden agenda) when dealing with him; this
way you will lose trust from him
Do not take advantage on his weaknesses or his negligence or his sincerity
5. DO NOT KILL HIS LIFE AND DO FITNAH
Never ever kill ones life, dignity or his existence by spreading fitnah
Stay away from fitnah or plough the seed of hatred or ill-intention toward a person.
6. NEVER EVER COMPARE, PAY GRATITUDE WITH WHAT YOU HAVE
Do not compare someone with someone else, our staff with other people staff,
our husband/wife with other peoples husband/wife

Do not praise other people and undermine your own relatives

Have to pay gratitude and appreciate what you have or possess
Keep in mind - you are my hero or you are my heroine
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IMPORTANT TIPS ON INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP

7. GIVE INSPIRATION, EXPECT THE BEST

Give inspiration, give trust, give hope

Give motivation to be the best, to give their best

Must expect the best from them

Be patient with their shortcomings and find ways so that they can improve
themselves through coaching, training or third partys roles

8.NEVER EVER LIE

Speak the truth never ever lie

Never manipulate your language or twist your tongue, doing so will make you a
hypocrite
9. FULFILL YOUR PROMISE DO NOT MAKE FALSE PROMISE

Must respect the promise you have made must fulfill it

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IMPORTANT TIPS ON INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP

10.SOMETIMES WE ARE STRATEGIC,NOT HYPOCRITE

We cannot be open to all things because it could be not strategic

Have to see the pros and cons of the things we discussed

If it carries more disadvantages than advantages, so it is better to avoid from being direct this is
what is called strategic.

11. LIKEABLE AND LIKE

Make it a habit to always eliminate the bad elements in our life
Improve yourself so that people like you
Train yourself to like other people
12. EXPECTATION

Sometimes our expectation on other people are not realistic or too high

All people have problems or circumstances which we do not know

We shouldnt be asking from them more than what they are capable of doing

Expectation which is too high might frustrate us

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13. DONT HOPE FOR RETURN OF FAVOR

Continue with good relationship without hoping anything in return
Even though people do not give a damn, we continue with good relationship with them
If we are hoping for a return of favor, maybe we will be frustrated
If we do not hope anything in favor, they will feel the true pleasure of friendship

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FRIENDSHIP
SPOILERS

Have strong vested interest

Like to take advantage
High expectation
Blame without investigation
Lying when speaking

Back biting
Take his rights

ENHANCERS
Good intention
Always helping
Keep his dignity
See the good aspects
than the bad aspects
No hidden agenda
Telling the truth and be
trustworthy
Give priority to a friend

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Success for YOU

in the new global and diverse workplace

requires
excellent communication skills!

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REFERENCES
1.

http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/interpersonalcommunication.html#ixzz2PJPQO6KY
2. http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/interpersonalcommunication.html
3. http://www.faculty.londondeanery.ac.uk/elearning/improve-your-lecturing/what-makes-a-goodlecturer
4. http://interpersonalskillsonline.com/how-to-developinterpersonal-skills

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