Once we believe that the perfect circumstances would make us happiest, we unconsci

ously conclude that failure to achieve the perfect circumstances would result
in suffering, or at least less happiness.
Throughout our lives we develop many concepts about what is perfect
herefore, many beliefs about what is bad or not good enough . 320

or ideal , and, t

Psychological thoughts are the ones that decide whether something is good
d these are the thoughts that create our suffering. 483

or bad , an

For simplicity, our psychological thoughts are nearly all of our thoughts that h
ave opposites. 484
This is because if a thought has an opposite, then we will almost certainly 484
Functional thoughts are mostly answers to the question How do I do that?

488

stop experiencing anxiety about the future, 944

then all that s necessary is to stop believing the thoughts that create these emot
ions. 944
All these emotions are created purely by thoughts in your mind and not by anythi
ng about you, your circumstances, or the people in your life. 945
Each question will show you a different reason why a specific type of thought mi
ght not be true. 992
He is filled with anxiety, constantly thinking, What if I don t get the job? How wi
ll I come across in the interview? What if they aren t impressed? 1045
How do I feel when I think this thought or tell myself this story? 1055
If no bad circumstance is actually happening right now but yet I can create an emo
tion (stress) right now just by thinking, then can I admit that thoughts have cr
eated my emotion rather than circumstances? 1057
Can I think of a few possible

bad

effects of getting the outcome I want? 1062

I can t know for sure that I will like it 1063

Do I know with absolute certainty that this outcome would be bad for my life? Can
I think of a few possible good effects from getting the outcome I don t want? 1066
While I do really want to get this job offer, the truth is that I don t know that
this job would be best for me or make me happiest. 1071
In general, the more attention we gave to a thought (e.g., 10% of our day), and
the longer we gave it attention (e.g., two months), the longer our present momen
t experience will be when we disbelieve the thought. 1137
If our thought was creating a large amount of sadness, then we won t have that sad
ness anymore, 1141
regardless of whether our attention is transferred to the present moment or just
other thoughts. 1141

If you believed your friend, you would likely feel hurt or embarrassed. But if y
our friend then smiles, and you recognize that he was joking, how would this aff
ect your emotional state? 1145
Why would this happen? It would happen solely because you stopped believing your
friend's words to be true. 1146
This is the same type of emotional impact that we experience when we disbelieve
a thought that 1148
was creating suffering for us. 1148
In the same way, when you experience an emotion, 1159
When you discover that you don t know whether your thought is true, you have essen
tially exposed how the trick works. 1160
If we realize that we don t know whether our thought it would be bad if they had a
negative opinion about me is actually true, then we can finally feel free to just
do and say whatever feels right and natural to us. 1179
After a few times, we often don't even need to ask ourselves any questions to di
sbelieve the thought because we almost instantly recognize we don't know whether
the thought is true. 1196
There is no such thing as

lasting happiness ; there is only a series of 1200

single moments. So becoming happier simply means there are more frequent moments
of happiness (although there are varying degrees) and fewer moments of sufferin
g. 1201
Put differently, as we disbelieve more thoughts, there is more silence (or space
) between thoughts. 1204
This process is meant to be used when your spouse or child does something
d you re about to yell at them and start a fight. 1213

wrong

How do you feel when you think this thought? Does thinking about this story crea
te an emotion? A moment ago you likely weren't feeling any emotion. Then, just b
y thinking, you began to experience an emotional reaction. 1484
If a specific event created a specific emotional experience, it would only be ab
le to create that emotional experience while the event was actually happening. 1
488
If you experience an emotional reaction right now, it must have been created by
something that s going on right now. 1491
Since you were giving attention to thoughts, your emotion must be a direct react
ion to the thoughts you just had, not any circumstance or event. 1491
In the same way, since thoughts can create an emotion right now just from thinki
ng about a past event, we know that thoughts alone are creating our emotion. 149
7
The emotion can only be created by a thought. If you think about taking a shower
next week, could this make your hair wet right now? No. 1499
Could I or someone else be happy despite having the same factual 1514

an

However, in order to claim that a specific circumstance creates a specific exper

ience, it must always create that same experience, for every person, every time.
1517
If a performance review at work created anxiety, then everyone would always expe
rience anxiety before their reviews. 1525
If two people each live in the same sized one-bedroom apartment, one person coul
d be proud about their living situation and the other could be ashamed about it.
1529
If two people are called
uld laugh it off. 1530

ugly , one person could get very upset, while the other co

Regardless of what the circumstance is, and regardless of whether the circumstan
ce is happening now or in 1557
the past, it can only be our thoughts about the circumstance that create our emo
tions. 1558
Could someone else be happy despite having the same circumstance? Have I ever be
en happy, or experienced a different emotion, under the same conditions? 1560
If I didn t know that the event had happened, would I still be suffering? 1565
While it seems that circumstances directly create our emotions, we actually can t
experience an emotion unless our minds know about the circumstance. 1573
Would I be suffering if I didn t know the event happened? 1585
If the circumstance wouldn t have created an emotion without my mind knowing what
happened (thoughts), then can I admit that the circumstance itself 1585
doesn t have the power to create my emotion? If my thoughts can create my emotion
with no event happening now (e.g., thinking about past or future), but an event
can t create an emotion without my thoughts (mind knowing what happened), then can
I admit that my thoughts have created my suffering, and not a circumstance? 158
6
If our bad circumstance still exists, but yet we can make ourselves happy purely b
y distracting ourselves from our negative thoughts, then it must be our thoughts
that are creating our unhappiness. 1606
The only facts were the words

get out of my way . 1627

Our emotion is created by the concept (thought), not by the facts. 1633
However, uncertainty about the future doesn t create anxiety. Anxiety is created b
y the belief that a bad outcome is possible. 1822
If we disbelieve our thought, recognizing I don t know if it s true that my boyfriend
doesn t care about me anymore , then we would no longer feel sad. 1827
Therefore, if you ever find that disbelieving a thought has created anxiety for
you, all you need to do is ask yourself the question What outcome do I think woul
d be bad? 1830
whether you actually know this 1832
future outcome

would be bad . 1832

In order to stop suffering from future bad moments, we can take a step back and qu
estion whether we actually know that the future bad event or situation will happen
. 2329