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What are the important factors in romantic relationship

and how these relationships be maintained.

30th May 2016

Project Tutor: Kate Absolum

Huangyu Wu (William)

15897214

Kan Gu (Karen)

15901698

Feng Guo (Feng)

16910052

Yujia Zhang (Monica)

16921836

Abstract
In todays world, the various reasons caused the separation of the couples, and there
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was also an increasing rate of divorce. Therefore, how people should do for
maintaining a romantic relationship became a hot issue to discuss. The purpose of this
study was to find some important factors in a good romantic relationship.
A survey was conducted, which involved one hundred interviewees in public areas of
Auckland. The result of the questionnaires was quantified by means of gender,
duration of a romantic relationship which respondents had, economic condition and
culture. All findings were displayed in the shape of charts.
There were a number of similarities and differences in the groups. As estimated, good
communication was the most important factor for maintaining a healthy romantic
relationship. Whereas, the sexual behaviour seemed not very important according to
the survey. Culture factor could little affect the opinions of respondents. It was worth
noting that the single respondents showed many different opinions during the
interview.
In conclusion, the respondents had various opinions considering of a good romantic
relationship, but the most important factors were same, such as good communication
and adultery.

Acknowledgements
We would like to thank the people who guided us with our project which is about how
to maintain positive romantic relationship.
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At the beginning, we wish to extend our bona fide gratitude to Kate Absolum as the
teacher for GIE 5, who provided us with valuable guidance in every stage of the
writing of this project, she has advised and taught us knowledge and procedures in
developing this research. It was a fantastic opportunity for us towards improving out
English academic ability. Meanwhile, we would like to extend our thanks to Duncan
Philps who is the elective teacher for GIE 5 for all his kindness and help not only in
this project but also enlighten our future study. We would like to thank all our teachers
who have helped us to develop the fundamental and essential academic competence.

Finally, we especially thank all our group members, as we have cooperated as a group
to finish this project, not personally and everyone supported and help each other. Last
but not least, we want to thank our classmates for other groups suggested some good
ideas and also grateful to a hundred respondents who spent time completing
questionnaires.

Contents
Abstract..2
1. Introduction6
1.1 Background......6
1.2 Aim...8
3

1.3 Hypothesis8
2. Methodology.
10
2.1 Overview 10
2.2 Sample10
2.3 Procedure11
2.4 Materials.11
2.5 Analysis..12
3. Findings13
3.1 Viewpoint between male and female..15
3.2 Viewpoint in different current status..16
3.3 Viewpoint in different financial background..17
3.4 Viewpoint in different cultural background19
4. Discussion.
29
4.1 Different viewpoints in gender...30
4.2 Different viewpoints in relationship status.....35
4.3 Different viewpoints in types of job.......39
4.4 Different viewpoints in different cultural background.......40
5. Conclusion45
References....47
Appendix..67

1. Introduction
1.1 Background
With the development of socialization, different characteristics of behavior influence
individuals viewpoint for romantic relationship between themselves and their
partners. People might pay close attention to how to keep the positive romantic
relationship and improve the satisfaction in the subsequent relationship (Weiser &
Weigel, 2016). A mature and stable relationship could be considered as the basic
5

requirements of social life. As a nation of immigrants, New Zealand welcomes


residents from every country with different culture, education background, religion,
working position, the individuals with unique personality could share different points
in this issue. Moreover, unexpected study result could indicate the interesting
distinction due to the cultural conflict. In order to help the individuals those who
intend to promote the satisfaction of romantic relationship, the project will suggest
important factors and state some negative aspects.

In this project, how to maintain romantic relationship can be defined as individuals


oriented toward developing strong and close relationships through different methods
including having good communication, share activities and emotional controls. Based
on these effective methods, it is also necessary to discuss that the various factors are
relating to satisfaction level are associated with healthy relationship (Malouff, Mundy,
Galea & Bothma, 2015). It is known that the positive relationship may include some
important aspect including passionate, romantic, sexual and same goals. Passionate
love, it may be explained as the intense desire of being an entity with the lover. (Caki,
Asfuroglu & Erbas, 2015) It seems like that passionate love share the same characters
with romantic to some extent. Although both of them seem short lasting, it might
present positive meaning and energy in a period of relationship. Sexual is also an
important factor in romantic relationship, influences of sexual satisfaction on
emotional intimacy were significant for both husbands and wives. (Yoo, BartleHaring, Day, Gangamma, 2014). Consequently, harmonious sexual relation maybe
plays a more direct function and affect relationship status in both of married and
unmarried. Research by Huang, Broniarczy, Zhang and Beruchashvili (2015), once
6

people involve in a relationship, they may usually assume activities and make efforts
to ensure successful goal attainment. As a result, when they feel anxiety and uncertain
about future, the acceptable way might be regarded to establish the tie between
individuals and their partner through sharing the same goals.

According to these views, it is clearly seen that the positive romantic relationship
might be affected by the complex aspects and the individuals immerse in a period of
romantic relationship that could focus on various factors. However, whether all the
negative aspects in romantic relationship can be defused is unknown and the previous
work did not cover the research about if the negative factors playing an important role
could also promote the relationship or not, for example, deception. Guthrie and
Kunkel (2013) discuss the deception is existing even in close relationships. They use
relational dialectics to argue that both of romantic partners may obtain more
satisfaction in the relationship even with deception.
1.2 Aim
The main purpose of this research is to investigate what factors largely contribute to
the positive romantic relationship, how to maintain a positive relationship and what
will lead to dissolution. In addition, this study was established to find whether
different gender, culture, relationship status and occupation have different preferences
in them of varied kinds of opinion and interest when they dealing with romantic
relationship.

1.3 Hypothesis
The primary aim of this research project is to discover what factors chiefly affect
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romantic relationship. The first hypothesis is good communication could be the best
way to maintain positive romantic relationship. It will also compare the importance
between people share same goal and sex quality, it is believed that the quality of sex
could result in emotion, therefore affect the romantic relationship. Secondly, most of
participates may agree with that deception is acceptable and will not lead to
dissolution but adultery could be the critical factor lead to break up. The next focus is
on passionate and romantic could be the most important factors in a positive romantic
relationship, it may be inconformity to people have different background.

2. Methodology
2.1 Overview
The purpose of the research was to investigate how to maintain a romantic
relationship. A survey was conducted to target people living or staying in Auckland
and all respondents were over 18 years old. Questionnaires were distributed in various
areas such as the Central Business District in Auckland, the campus of Auckland
University of Technology and City Wharf. These places were chosen to ensure a
representative sample. Data were collected from April 22 to April 25.

2.2 Sample
A hundred participants completed the questionnaire. The age group were divided into
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six, which were younger than 20, 20-30, 31-40, 41-50, 51-60 and over 60 years old.
The current relationship status included single, boyfriend or girlfriend, de-facto
relationship and married. And then the non-single respondents were grouped by the
relationship duration with the current partner which were less than 1, 1-4, 5-7 and
over 7 years. The status of employment included students, employed in part-time,
employed in full-time and unemployed. The places of birth were classified by
continents, i.e., Asia, Africa, Europe, North America, South America and Oceania. In
order to obtain representative data, all respondents were chosen at random, often at
public places, which provided the opportunity for the questionnaire to be complete.

2.3 Materials
The purpose of the questions is to find what the important factors were in a romantic
relationship. Some factors, such as adventurous, passionate, playful, romantic, sexual,
health and same goals, could have the positive effects on the relationship; other
factors, for instance, deception, quarrelling, indifference, violence and adultery, could
affect the relationship negatively. For maintenance of a healthy romantic relationship,
some kinds of behaviour could be helpful, for example, having good communication,
shared activities, control of emotion and privacy and space. The questionnaire
contained 22 questions which cover Likert scale, multiple choice and open questions.

Example of a Likert scale question.


How satisfied are you with your current relationship?
Very unsatisfied

Very satisfied

Example of a selection
question.
9

What is your relationship status?


Single (Please go to Q.6)
Boyfriend/Girlfriend
De-facto relationship
Married

Example of open question.


(please
h) O t h e r
__________________________________________
2.4 Procedure and data analysis

specify):

The procedure for collecting data consisted of three steps. First, the respondents were
approached and were asked whether they had time to carry out a simple questionnaire.
Second, after obtaining their permission, they were required to complete a
questionnaire, and they were guided in writing their answers in order to prevent
potential misunderstanding of the questions and invalid answers. Third, the papers
were collected and analysed through Microsoft Excel and the graphs were copied to
Microsoft Word.

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3. Findings
Findings varied from the different population types in terms of gender, the status of
the current romantic relationship, the financial situation and the culture.
Of the interviewees, almost a half were female, and another half were male; one in
three were single, while others were divided into four groups according to the years of
keeping the current romantic relationship, which include less than 1 year at seven
per cent, 1 - 4 years at 16 per cent, 4 - 7 years at six per cent and more than 7
years at seven per cent; just over one third had full-time jobs, 15 per cent had parttime jobs, but nearly a half were students or unemployed; one out of three were
easterners and two third were westerners. Respondents were asked the same questions
regarding the factors of romantic relationship, the factors of keeping romantic
relationship and the factors causing breakup, so there are several charts below
displaying the findings respectively.

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3.1

Percentage of factors in a romantic relationship


30

23

15

Adventurous

Playful

Sexual

Same goals

Female
Male

Figure 1 Factors in a romantic relationship


The graph shows the proportion of the most important factor in a romantic
relationship between female and male. As can be seen in the graph, both female and
male consider that same goals is the most important factor, nearly 30 per cent in male,
and followed by 19 per cent in female. The proportion of adventurous, passionate
playful and health were accounted for approximately 15 per cent of choice
respectively in female. However, only one percent female respondents believed that
romance is the most important factor while more than one-tenth reported in male
interviewee. Rarely female (one percent) made the point that sexual is the critical
12

element while not a single male respondent agreed. 15 per cent of respondents
indicate love, responsibility, mature personality and trust could also be the important
factor during a romantic relationship.

Female

number
34%

Having good communication


53%
Others
3%and space
Privacy
Control
3% of emotion
5% activities
Shared
2%

13

Male

Others
Privacy and space2%
13%

Control of emotion
8%

Shared activities
10%
Having good communication
67%

Figure 2 Factors for maintaining a romantic relationship


These two pie chart demonstrate the proportion of most important factor in maintain
positive romantic relationship between female and male. The majority (81 per cent) of
female respondent agree that having good communication is the most effective
method which is followed by two thirds of male respondents. Eight percent of both
interviewees believe that emotional control could be the critical element, but more
males (13 per cent) regard privacy and space as the most important factor. One-Tenth
of male respondent indicate that shared activities is the most pivotal factor while three
percent in female respondent reported.

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Female
Deception

10% Quarreling
2%
Indifference
5%

number
34%

Violence
32%
Adultery
16%

Male
Deception
11%
number
32%

Quarreling
3%
Indifference
9%

Others
1%

Violence
21%
Adultery
22%

Figure 3 Factors for dissolution of a romantic relationship


These two pie chart show the proportion of most important factor which result in
relationship dissolution between female and male. Half of female interviewee agree
that violence is the critical element for a couple to break up, while more than thirty
15

percent of male are the same. However, 33 per cent of male respondents consider
adultery should be the least factor while a quarter of female agree. Quarreling is not
considering to be important among all respondents, three percent and four percent
respectively.

3.2 Viewpoint in different current status

Factors that could improve relationships


12

Number of people

0
Adventure single
Passion

Playful
<1

Romantic
1 - 4 Sexual

4 Health
-7

Same>7
goals

Others

16

single

Others
9%
Same goals
9%

Adventure
25%

Health
9%

Romantic
9%

Playful
11%

Passion
27%

Figure 4 Factors in a romantic relationship


Figure 4 shows the most significant relationship improvement factor within different
relationship status. As can be seen the differences between single and non-single
respondents was large. There were a quarter who chose Adventure and a just over
quarter who chose passion. However, in the not single group, merely a few of them
chose Adventure and passion. Furthermore, in 1 - 4 years relationship group, there
were 9 of them who chose Same goal. In addition, six people who have more than 7
years relationship considered that Health was the most important element.
Meanwhile, there were nine per cent of single respondents who chose Romance,
Health, Same goal and Other were the best, respectively.

17

Factors that could help maintain relationships

Number of people

40

30

20

10

0
single
Good communication
other

<1

1-4

4-7

sharedRelationship
activities
Emotional control
status

>7
privacy and space

Figure 5 Factors for maintaining a romantic relationship


Figure 5 indicates the most important factors for maintaining relationship. It conveys
that most of the people chose Good communication as the most significant factor.
Only 1 single respondent chose Emotional control as being the best, while there
were seven people who believe that controlling emotion is very important. The
number of respondents who chose Privacy and space were the same.

18

Factors that could separate relationship

Number of people

16

12

0
Deception

Quarreling

Indifference

single
>7

<1

Violence
1-4

Adultery

Other

4-7

single
Adultery
25%

Deception
25%

Quarreling
7%
Indifference
7%
Violence
36%

Figure 6 Factors for dissolution of a romantic relationship


Figure 6 displays the worst factors in a relationship that could cause the dissolution.
Almost a half of the respondents chose Violence. The second popular was
Adultery. What is more, there were one in four of the single respondents who stated
that Deception was the worst factor. By contrast, just five respondents from other
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relationship status chose Deception.


3.3 The financial situation

The percentage of "Agree+AgreeStrongly"with these


factors in each of the different occupations

The percentage of factors

100

75

50

25

Adventurous

Playful

Sexual

Same goals

The eight different factors


Full-time
Unemployed

Part-time

Student

Figure 7. The financial situation


Figure 7 indicates the percentage of eight factors which affected individuals in a
romantic relationship. The figures came from one hundred interviewees in different
occupations. It was clearly seen that the two largest percentage factors were
passionate and romantic. The 87 per cent of part-time job interviewees and 88 per
cent of students chose the factor of passionate. In addition, the romantic
accounted for almost the biggest proportion, the amount of every four working
conditions including full-time job, part-time job, student and unemployment nearly
showed the maximum rate, at 70 per cent, 93 per cent, 81per cent and 83 per cent
respectively.

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The percentage of selection

The percentage of selection in"Passionate"


50

38
25

13

Disagree Strongly

Disagree

Undecide

Agree

Agree Stongly

The five different selection


Full-time

Part-time

Student

Unemployed

Figure 8. The percentage of each selection in Passionate"


According to this figure, the amount of full-time job (72 per cent), part-time job (87
per cent) and student (89 per cent) occupied the largest percentages both in selection
of agree and agree strongly. The data of amount of part-time job (47 per cent) and
student (50 per cent) all reach the top. But the data from unemployed was relatively
lower, in the choice of agree strongly, it is the smallest percentage (17 per cent). By
contrast, the highest data (33 per cent) of unemployed reveals in the choice of
disagree although it was as the same as the choice of agree.

21

The percentage of important factors in a


romantic relationship with interviewees in
different occupations
The percentag of factors

50

38

25

13

0
Adventurous

Playful

Sexual

Same goals

The eight different factors

Full-time

Part-time

Student

Unemployed

Figure 9. The percentage of important factors in a romantic relationship with


interviewees in different occupations
Figure 9 shows that the most of interviewees chose health and same goals. The
highest percentage was 40 per cent of person who have part-time job in same goals
and full-time interviewees showed the lowest proportion in the choice of sexual (3 per
cent). Moreover, other two highest data of unemployed were indicated in health and
other. The other point of view from unemployed included responsibility, love,
comprehension, maturation, and education.

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3.4

westerners

Others
9%

Adventurous
12%

Samegoals
22%

Health
13%

Passionate
18%

Playful
16%

Sexual
1%Romantic
7%

Easterners

Others
9%

Adventurous
21%

Samegoals
27%
Passionate
15%

Health
15%

Romantic Playful
6%
6%

Figure 100 Factors in a romantic relationship


23

Figure 10 shows the percentage of the most important factors of romantic relationship
in terms of Adventure, Passion, Playfulness, Romance, Sex, Healthiness,
Same Goals and Others.
The proportion of Same Goals was the highest both in two groups, at 22 per cent and
28 per cent. The factor Adventure accounts for 21 per cent of all the factors, which
was the second highest in the western group. By contrast, the second highest in the
eastern group was the factor Passion. The factor Sex was the lowest in the western
group, at two per cent. Furthermore, there was no eastern respondent who chose the
factor Sex.

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westerners

Privacy Other
3%
7%
ControlOfEmotion
10%

SharedActivity
6%

GoodCommunication
73%

easterners

Privacy Other
3%
9%
ControlOfEmotion
3%
SharedActivity
9%

GoodCommunication
76%

Figure 11 Factors for maintaining a romantic relationship


25

Figure 11 shows the percentage of the various factors of maintaining a romantic


relationship, which were chosen by the different respondents from the different
continents.
In the western group the factor Good Communication accounted for almost three
quarters of the total choices, and the highest proportion of the factor Good
Communication was even over three out of four, at 76 per cent. Whereas, the
proportion of the rest of the factors was relatively much lower than the proportion of
the factor Good Communication at ten per cent.
According to the pie charts, the western respondents and the eastern respondents gave
the same highest priority in having Good Communication between the partners each
other.

Westerners

Others Deception
1%
13%

Adultery
27%

Quarreling
4%
Indifference
7%

Violence
46%

26

easterners
Deception
21%
Adultery
33%
Quarreling
3%

Indifference
15%

Violence
27%

Figure 12 Factors for dissolution of a romantic relationship


Figure 12 shows the percentage of the different factors, such as Deception,
Quarreling, Indifference, Violence, Adultery and others, causing dissolution of
romantic relationship, which were answered by the western and eastern interviewees.
The highest percentage in the western group was the factor Violence, which was
near a half (at 46 per cent). On the other hand, the eastern group saw that the factor
Adultery accounted for the highest proportion at 34 per cent of the total factors. The
factor Violence was the second highest percentage in the eastern group, at 27 per
cent. The percentage of the factor Indifference in the eastern group was two times
which compared with the figure in the western group.

To summarize the findings, Good Communication is the most important factor for
maintaining a good romantic relationship; Sex seems not very important in a
romantic relationship; Violence should be concerned for protecting a romantic
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relationship.

4. Discussion
4.1 Different viewpoint in gender
The Figure 1 confirm that most people believe two people sharing a common goal is
more important than the quality of sexual behavior. It is believed that both partner
pursuing the same objective and sharing values could be mutual understanding during
trouble. Two people share a similar goal could affect actual behaviour with contextual
demand (Oettingen, Ahn, Gollwitzer, Kappes, & Kawade, 2014). The finding shows
that only one interviewee agree with sexual behavior is the most important factor
among all 100 interviewees. According to biology, the purpose of sexual behavior is
for procreation and propagation. Most people could obtain pleasure and enjoy the
process. The high quality of sex could contribute to positive romantic relationship but
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it could not be the critical factor. Yoo (2014) pointed that it is sometimes observed
that sexually satisfied partners do not necessarily feel emotionally close.

In figure 2, The majority of female respondent and two third of male respondents
agreed that good communication to be critical to maintain a positive romantic
relationship. Communication usually defined as the process of thought transference
and feedback. Sharing oneself opinion actively to another could help create intimacy
and interaction. Quarreling is one kind of communication, which consisted in most of
relationship. It is also being observed that quarreling is not the most important factor
lead to dissolution which also can be seen in figure two. Communication exist in most
of period in a positive relationship, first acquaintance, dating, marriage and growing
old. Constructive communication skill could be utilized in the established phase to
start or sustain the relationship (Marla, 2015). Good communication could untie
misunderstanding and share how they feel without criticizing, state their needs
without blaming each other. However, indignation, suspicion and incomprehension
could result from poor communication or lack of communication. Poor
communication behaviors could make both of partner feeling hurt or pain even
between highly satisfied partners (Young, Bippus & Dunbar., 2015)

Deception with partner may have two reasons. Firstly, to avoid conflict or relational
trauma. Secondly, a vicious real lie. As it could be seen from the figure 3, one fifth
respondents pointed that deception is the critical factor which lead to dissolution. In
Guthrie and Kunkel (2013) s research, several participate agree that using deception
is easier than telling the truth, sometimes could avoid possible fight. It is believed that
29

deception is one of the reason result in dissolution, however, most of people are
interested in the reasons behind deception and these reasons could be the causes for a
couple to break up such as adultery.

4.2 Different viewpoint in relationship status


Figure 4 shows that there are 27% single people who believe that passion is the most
important factor could improve the relationship. But for the non-singles, they believe
the same goal is the most important factor. Carbonneau and Vallerand (2013) stated
that people would have better relational skills when they have a harmonious passion
than a obsessive passion. Research has shown that having a harmonious passion is
related to enhanced relationship quality both in the workplace and in sport settings.
(Carbonneau & Vallerand, 2013) It is noticed that the meaning of relationship
improvement is not the same for people with different relationship status. For singles,
improvement means they might go into a relationship from being single. So they
might need passion and adventure to attract opposite sex. But for the non-singles, this
may only mean to improve their relationship to a higher level, this is may be the most
important factor for relationship maintenance. This may explain the reason for the
enormous difference within our statistics as it is a different question for different
respondents.

Figure 6 reveals an interesting point which a quarter singles believe that deception is
the worst. In contrast, only few non-singles agree with that. Drouin, Tobin and
Wygant (2014) stated that deception is common in daily life, and it has pros and cons
30

on a relationship. In the research, 37% of non-single s lied during sexting to their


committed partners; lie about what they doing or wearing is 17%, and 20% both.
(Drouin, Tobin & Wygant, 2014)

4.3 Different viewpoint in types of job


From the figure7, it is clearly seen that the selections of romantic and passionate are
the most percentage in all different factors. The complex factors (including
adventurous, passionate, playful, romantic, sexual, health and same goals) could
affect romantic relationships between two individuals, but some viewpoints still
indicate the same trend, like passionate and romantic, which share the largest
percentages. Because the hypothesis is that passionate and romantic could be the
biggest proportion at the beginning. According to the study, the data might not prove
the hypothesis. The passionate love could be continually shaped by novel and exciting
experiences and keep alive through the excitement and sparks. That may not only
create the sense of well-being in romantic relationship, but also affect the individuals
emotion in multiple relationships and social networks (Welker, Baker, Padilla,
Holmes, Aron & Slatcher, 2014) Moreover, research by Graham (2011), the emotion
of romantic is also a significant viewpoint in young generation. The positive
requirement of romantic could promote length of relationship and level of
satisfaction. In other words, individuals look forward the harmonious relationship,
which present maturely and successfully, the romantic obsessive and dependent
qualities of the relationship could be less apparent. As a result, people might pay more
close attention to passionate and romantic in their relationship.

31

According to the figure8, the specific analysis of passionate, the total number of
students occupy the largest percentage. The hypothesis for this question is that the
part-time job means people have more time and certain economic base to enjoy
romantic relationship, but the figure of bar chart shows the student group may
consider the important aspect in romantic relationship is passionate. The
longitudinal study examined that some features or behaviors between adolescent
personality types and young adult romantic relationship quality is the important factor
which effect their emotional world. Although during adolescent period, there are some
negative behavior such as anxiety, impulsion and peevishness, the positive aspect of
their character which include passion and brave could remedy these defects. (Yu,
Branje, Keijsers & Meeus, 2015) Perhaps when the young generation become mature
with the growth of social skills and working experience, the factors of feature could
reduce the influence in romantic relationship, but the factor of passionate still
indicates the advanced impact in the specific period.

Figure9 shows an interesting phenomenon in the opening question, the majority


choice is health and same goals, which is completely different with the original
hypothesis. Even though the most of individuals prefer the factors of romantic and
passionate, they may pay more attention to the same goal and health. The high quality
of romantic relationship not only gets along with excitement, but also associate with
romantic relationship stability and satisfaction. That means individuals intend to keep
the positive romantic relationship for a long time, they could obtain the ability of high
emotion intelligence including good health and outstanding performance at work or
future plan (Malouff, Schutte & Thorsteinsson, 2012).
32

4.4 Different viewpoint in different cultural background


First, the findings did not show a sharp difference between the westerners and the
easterners. To some extent, this indicated that cultural diversity at least on romantic
relationship was probably vanishing due to the impact of globalization.
As for the most important factor of romantic relationship which can be seen from
Figure 10, Same Goal accounted for the highest percentage both in the western
group and the eastern group. In fact, Same Goal reflected some kind of expectation
for the future (Yum, Canary, & Baptist, 2015). Whereas, Yum, Canary and Baptist
(2015) found the expectation for the future was the most significant factor for a good
romantic relationship, even though the percentage from the westerners was higher
than the figure of the easterners. It is not surprising that there were not any eastern
respondents who chose Sexual as the most important factor of romantic relationship.
According to Yum, Canary and Baptist (2015), in most of the eastern countries,
premarital dating is widely not welcomed. However, the western respondents had
almost the same choice as the eastern ones. It may be the limitation of interview in
public, and perhaps the respondents were reluctant to talk about sex.
As predicted which can be seen in Figure 11, Good Communication was the most
important activity for maintaining a good romantic relationship. Whereas, ChuanChuan and Tardy (2009) stated that American participants were more likely to
communicate with his/her partner after the conflict than Chinese participants, and
Chinese participants preferred to keep silence. However, the survey showed the
easterners also gave top priority in Good Communication as the same as the
westerners did.
33

Regarding the reasons for breakup which were found in Figure 12, Adultery was the
first choice of the eastern respondents at 34 per cent, and even the percentage of
Adultery was higher than the percentage at 27 per cent from the western
respondents, although Zhang et al. (2012) mentioned that American participants were
more likely to have an exit response instead of finding third-party help which were
the most choices from Chinese participants. The first choice of western respondents
was Violence. Indeed, Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) is a significant problem
which exists widely in the world, even though various organizations and individuals
made many efforts on raising awareness and reducing incidence (Jackson et al.,
2006). IPV and adultery as well, they both should be paid more attention for keeping
a good romantic relationship, since they are the first two reasons causing breakup in
the findings.

5. Conclusion
This research aimed to investigate the peoples opinions about what factors could
effect romantic relationship in the terms of improvement, maintenance and
dissolution. It also aimed to explore the difference in perceptions in terms of gender,
culture, relationship status and occupation when they dealing with romantic
relationship.
One of the most significant findings is that there a factor affect romantic relationship
which is that Passion for single people is the best way to improve a romantic
relationship, and communication for non-single people is the best way of improving
34

improving and maintaining in a romantic relationship. As predicted, Good


Communication is the most significant activity for maintaining a good romantic
relationship.
The result confirms that a large number of people hold a position that sharing a
similar goal is more significant than have a high quality of sexual behavior.
Additionally, most participants agree that deception is acceptable and may not lead to
dissolution.
Last of all, there is no real difference between gender and nationalities in them of
prospective on relationships. Both of them hold the same positions that
Communication is the most factor within a romantic relationship, as well as the
Violence is the worst factor which could cause relationship separation chose by
people who come from western countries and the Adultery which was chosen by
people who are from eastern countries.
Implications
According to our research, the implication of this survey is that it may help
individuals to understand that the best way of escalating and maintaining a romantic
relationship, additionally, to avoid the worst behaviors which could lead to seperation.
It could also raise the awareness of the importance of 'good communication to society
, because it plays a vital role in maintaining a good relationship. Furthermore, it
would have a positive impact on reducing violence.
Limitations
There are some limitations to this research. Firstly, the size of this sample is small,
only 100 questionnaires. The another limitation is that the majority of participants are
come from Asia (China and India). So it may not represent the general population. It
35

is possible to pose more questions about more questionnaires and more specific
questions in the future.
Recommendations
It is suggested that more participants should be interviewed in the research in the
future. More over, in the future investigating, more attention should be paid to the one
small part and detail, which could has more value of application.
Another suggestion is that there are some differences of recognition and acceptance
level of Adultery and Violence between people from eastern and western countries,
which may valuable for researchers who are interesting the differences between
western and eastern countries.
Moreover, expectations of romantic relationship between employed and unemployed
people are different. It might be valuable of application.

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38

Appendix

How to maintain a romantic relationship?


Hi, we are AUT international students. We are working on a research project
about: How to maintain a romantic relationship? The questionnaire will take
three minutes and all your answers will be anonymous.
Your participation in this survey is very much appreciated!
1, What is your gender?
Female
Male
2, What is your age?
<20
20 - 30
41 - 50
50 - 60

31 - 40
60+
39

3, What is your relationship status?


Single (Please go to Q.6)
Boyfriend/Girlfriend
De-facto relationship
Married
4, If you are not single, how long have you been together with your
current partner?
<1 year
1 year-4 years
4-7 years
>7 years
5, How satisfied are you with your current relationship?
Very unsatisfied

Very satisfied

6, What is your working status?


Student
Employed Part-time
Employed Full-time
Unemployed
7, Where are you from?
Asia
Africa
Europe
North America
South America
Oceania
8, To what extent do you think these factors important in a romantic
relationship?
a) Adventurous -eager for new experiences and willing to experiment
Disagree Strongly

Agree Strongly

b) Passionate -having or expressing strong emotions


Disagree Strongly

Agree Strongly

c) Playful -full of fun and high spirits


Disagree Strongly

Agree Strongly

d) Romantic -expressive of or exciting sexual love or romance


Disagree Strongly

Agree Strongly

e) Sexual -harmonious and stable


Disagree Strongly

f)

Agree Strongly

Health -both in physical and mental


Disagree Strongly

Agree Strongly

g) Same goals -share the same viewpoint to life and world


Disagree Strongly

Agree Strongly

40

(please
specify):
h) O t h e r
__________________________________________
9, Which is the most important factor? Choose one (a-h)
______________
10, How do you think a positive romantic relationship can be
maintained?
a)

Having good communicationNot important

b)

Shared activities

Not important

Important

c)

Control of emotion

Not important

Important

d)

Privacy and space

e) O t h e r

Not important

Important

Important

(please

specify):

____________________________________________
11, Which factor do you think is the most important to maintain a
positive romantic relationship? Choose one (a-e) _______
12, To what extent do you think these factors could lead to relationship
dissolution?
a)

Deception

Disagree Strongly

Agree Strongly

b)

Quarreling

Disagree Strongly

Agree Strongly

c)

Indifference

d)

Violence

e)

Adultery (cheat on sb.) Disagree Strongly

f)

Other

Disagree Strongly
Disagree Strongly

Agree Strongly
Agree Strongly
Agree Strongly

(please

specify):

_____________________________________________
13, Which factor do you think could be the main cause for relationship
dissolution? Choose one (a-f) ________

41

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