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The 13 Essential Friendship Traits

How much you agree with each statement?

1. I am trustworthy.
2. I am honest with others.
3. I am generally very dependable.
4. I am loyal to the people I care about.
5. I am easily able to trust others.
6. I experience and express empathy for others.
7. I am able to be non-judgmental.
8. I am a good listener.
9. I am supportive of others in their good times.
10. I am supportive of others in their bad times.
11. I am self-confident.
12. I am usually able to see the humor in life.
13. I am fun to be around.

Traits of Integrity
These qualities, represented by the first 5 traits on the list above, are related to core values
held by most culturestrustworthiness, honesty, dependability, loyalty, and, as an
interrelated quality, the ability to trust others.

Trustworthiness is often the make or break element in any interpersonal

relationship. Any breach, regardless of perceived magnitude, can devastate a
relationship. Trustworthiness is comprised of several components, including honesty,
dependability, and loyalty, and while each is important to successful relationships,
honesty and dependability have been identified as the most vital in the realm of

Honesty requires that we speak openly from the heart and incorporate objectivity into
our words.

Being dependable means that friends can count on you to be there when you say you
will, to do what you say you will, and to be willing to stand up for friends, especially
when they cant stand up for themselves. If you are as likely to let friends down as
come through for them, the relationship often becomes superficial, less engaging, and
even resentment-provoking, if it doesnt end altogether.

Loyalty is valued early on in all of our relationships, from the time we make our first
friendships. We need friends who wont spill our secrets to others, gossip about us, or
allow others to criticize us.

Being able to trust another person involves being comfortable with vulnerability. If
you have difficulty sharing your authentic self with a friend, it is doubtful your friend
will be easily willing to do this for you.

Traits of Caring

These qualities, represented by the traits listed as numbers 6 to 10 above, includes empathy,
the ability to withhold judgment, effective listening skills, and the ability to offer support
in good times and bad. These traits require personal insight, self-discipline, and unconditional
positive regard for our friends.

Empathy is the ability to understand what is going on with a friend, to recognize how
he or she is feeling, and to interact and respond accordingly.

The ability to be non-judgmental reflects our ease in accepting a friends choices,

regardless of how they may differ from our own.

Good listening skills are essential to allow the communicating of intimate thoughts,
feelings, and experiences. This sharing is a gradual process of give and take that
deepens over time.

Being supportive of others in their bad times is a defining quality of a good friend, but
being supportive of others in their good times is also essential. The saying goes,
Everybody loves a winner, but for some of us, this just isnt so. If you have trouble
celebrating anothers good fortune and experience envy or even bitterness, this may
limit the depth of your friendships.

Traits of Congeniality
This group, representing by the final three traits listed above, includes self-confidence, the
ability to see the humor in life, and being fun to be around. This trio of traits has also been
associated with overall well-being and happiness in life.

Self-confidence is an appealing characteristic in any friend, and may even be

contagious. When we are in the company of self-confident individuals, we typically
feel our own confidence rise.

People who are fun to be around are better company than friends who walk around
with a dark cloud hanging over their heads. The former enjoy life, handle challenges
in proactive ways, and keep negative experiences in perspective.

People who have the ability to see the humor in life help us deal with the curveballs
(or spitballs) life tosses at us. We all benefit from friends who are able to keep us from
taking life too seriously.

Other characteristics of a good friend shall have:

1. Accepts you as you are: A true friend is someone who does not try to be somebody that
she is not and accepts you as you are. They are also patient with you when you make
mistakes and forgive you easily.
2. Is Dependable: A true friend is dependable and you can trust your friend with your secrets
and know that he would not let a third person know about it. They stick with you in good
times and bad.
3. Is Honest: A true friend would be honest and loyal with you. She does not break the
promises that she made to you. She makes you feel safe and secure with her.
4. Listens to you: A true friend always listens to you and cares about your needs and
emotions. A true friend would be there always when you need to talk. When you have news
to share or grievances, she will give you her full attention.
5. Would be there for you: A true friend would be there with you through thick and thin.
Good friends dont call up people only to request a favor. But would be the first person to
come to your aid in time of crisis.
6. Gives you Space: A true friend respects your privacy. They understand that you have
family, other friends and colleagues who are part of your life too and do not cling to you

always. A true freind builds trust and confidence with you, which makes you comfortable
enough to share your good and bad times.
7. Always keep in touch: True friends dont wait for you to call them. They always makes
an effort to keep in touch with you even if it is through a quick phone call or an email. They
know what's going on in your life and is interested about it. A good friend makes it clear that
they care about you.
8. Do not gossip about you: A true friend does not gossip about you or talk behind your
back. A true friend is a person you can trust and won't say anything about you or try to
damage your reputation. They will let you know when they're concerned and do their best to
stick up for you when you're in trouble. A good friend will also apologizes when she does
something wrong. She does not hold grudges.
9. Would be Happy for you: A true friend never gets jealous on your success but would be
happy for you. She celebrates your success as her success. A good friend will likely know
how to lift your spirits and make your day.
10. Would be Supportive: A true friend is supportive of you and your goals. She will know
what makes you tick and help you become the person you want to be. They won't try to
change who you are or drag you into situations that make you uncomfortable.
11. Is Giving: True friends give more than what is asked. When they see a need they respond
without expecting anything in return and without anyone knowing about it. True friends are
generous with their time, money, possessions and knowledge. Best of all they have a
generous spirit.

Benefits of Having Friends:

1. They Show You Who You Are

Most people tend to pick friends that are similar to themselves in thinking and actions. Taking
note of this, it is safer to say then that the kind of friends we have plays a very large part in
helping us get to know ourselves better. Since friends are meant to be like-minded people,
they can help us figure out what our goals and dreams are and help by encouraging us to stay
on the right track while we chase our dreams.
2. A Shoulder To Lean On
In most times when we find ourselves in trouble, many people tend to turn to their friends for
support, choosing them over family members. In truth, good friends can help you cope with
the traumas of life events, which include illness, divorce, loss of a job or the death of a loved
one. Friends can provide us with a strong shoulder to support us when we are heartbroken.
With friends that will always be there for us when we need them comes a greater peace of
mind, because we know that no matter what life throws at us our friends will always be there
for us.

3. They Keep Us In Line

Very few strangers will tell you what you need to know out of politeness, but friends step in
and tell you things the way they are. Since your friends know your ins and outs, they are in a
better position to be able to spot things that you cannot see or those you choose to overlook.
True friends have no problem telling you the truth, because they trust you will take their
words seriously. Everyone needs a reality check once in a while and who better to give us that
than those close to us. They also point out unhealthy lifestyles and habits and encourage us to
avoid or change them till we do.
4. So With Them You Can Be Yourself
When you have friends you are comfortable around, there is no need to shy or hide your
emotions, because you can be yourself around them. They are the ones you feel comfortable
changing your clothes around, sleeping in the same room and be carefree.
5. You Can Be As Gross With Them As You Want
You can spit around them, chew your burger with the grease dripping down your finger and
still not feel shy about doing any of these because you know they will not see you any
6. No One Will Finish Your Sentences As Well As They Do
They have this knack of knowing what you are thinking or going to say, sometimes you start
a sentence and midway they finish it for you, like they are in your head. This happens when
you spend a lot of time with friends and they have come to know your line of thought and

7. They Will Tell You How It Really Is

Friends are never afraid to speak their mind, with them you get cautioned whenever you step
out of line. They will tell you the truth that a casual friend or family member may not.
8. Expand Your Social Circle
Friends will introduce you to people you might have otherwise not have met. When you have
friends that love socializing and meeting new people, you get the opportunity to expand your
social circle. In most cases they are always eager to introduce you to someone they met and
who they believe would be perfect for you.
9. They Keep You Focused
They provide the balance and focus you need in different aspect of your life. Since you derive
your energy in different ways, you keep each other balanced and you are able to draw from
two different perspectives.
10. Youre Always A Mystery

Being the quiet one among your friends means you draw all the attention and intrigue. People
are always sort of curious to know what your story is or what is behind the silence most
times. Your friend loves you even more for not caring that they are always the star of the
11. They Keep You Entertained
With friends the fun never stops, and it always seems like you are always doing something
exciting or downright silly. They engage you in crazy stunts and dares, and when youre
feeling down about something they always know just the right game to get you out of your
12. They Tell You Everything
You never have to guess what others are saying behind your back or how they are feeling,
because they will always tell you what they think. They tend to wear their heart on their
sleeve for you and that happens to be one of the reasons you love them so much. When
around you, they are naturally expressive and never keep anything secret.
13. You Never Miss The Gist
They are always first to know the latest event or party and when it is happening. They know
when the new restaurant is opening, when the carnival will take place, a spontaneous party
happening last minute. You know you can always count on them to come up with fun ideas of
something to do when bored.

14. They Have You Laughing Non-Stop

With them you are always saying something completely ridiculous or amusing or they are
and no one can make your ribs hurt with laughter like they can. Even in the most stressed out
situations they still manage to play the clown and come up with a joke to lighten up the
15. They Are Better At Making Decisions
In situations where you would usually take time to really think things through, your friends
are more spontaneous in their approach than you. They think fast on their feet and you know
sometimes that it comes in handy when under pressure.
16. They Are The Life Of Every Party
Without them the electricity is just not there. Even if you do not mind being the center of
attention, it takes the pressure off of you having a friend who is so always comfortable in the
spotlight and enjoys the energy of being the item of everyones attention, and you appreciate
being able to sit back and just observe.

17. They Are A Source Of Inspiration

With friends you find inspiration in the way they approach everything in life. They are bold
and never afraid to be themselves and just put themselves out there. This positive attitude of
theirs is infectious and you love how they take risks without fear of failing.
18. They Make The Best Wingman/Wing-Woman
Whenever you feel a bit shy or awkward about approaching someone to talk to them, they
always have your back and will put in a good word about you anywhere any time.
19. They Are Proud Of You
Your friends are always proud of your accomplishments and will share them with others at
the slightest chance they get. Even when you hate talking about yourself and feel
embarrassed, you love how proud your friend is of you and how eager they are to defend your
20. They Are Great At Networking
They always seem to have the answers to every problem and seem to always know someone
who can help you or others out of a fix. Whenever you talk about a project or discuss how
you need to get people together for a particular event, they already have a ton of ideas to
suggest and to put in motion.

21. Source Of Gossip

Especially with the ladies to be honest gossip is fun, the guys are not left out. And who better
to gossip with than our friends about people we know and the extraordinary things that
celebrities get up to and a whole lot of other things. Gossip should be fun, and when it
involves our friends its all the more fun.
22. They Provide Support
One of the most important reasons why we need friends is for emotional and physical
support. There are certainly times in our lives when things do not go right, and our friends are
absolutely important to help us get through this period. While it would be awful to have
nobody to turn to in times of need, we need to cherish our friends and they will always be
there for you when you need them most.
23. Source Of Advice
Our friends on different occasions are brilliant sources of advice on all sorts of matters that
elude us. When an issue is personal and delicate, who else can you ask about personal issues?

Even though you do not have to follow their advice, yet it is useful to get their opinions on
certain matters to help us decide what we want to do and what is the right course of action for
us to take.
24. They Are Great Company
Another good point about having friends is that they provide us with great company. As
social creatures we need to have contact with others of our kind. Think of how bored you get
when you have not seen your friends for a while, and how great you feel after a fun night out
with them. We should make efforts to get together with them and enjoy their company as
much as we can.
25. Sharing Is Caring
An important aspect of having friends is that they give us the chance to share things with
them. They allow us use their phones, computers and some will allow us wear their clothes.
Sharing makes us feel a lot better when we are down, and really great when we have good
news to report.
26. Support When You Need It
When you have positive friends, you do not need to go about requesting help from others
when you need it, because they are always willing to be there for you even without asking for
it. Positive individuals always want others to be happy, and they will go out of their way to
brighten us up when we are feeling down or need some extra special attention.

27. They Bring Out The Best In You

Positive friends will not only help you recover from the negative hits you take in life, they
will also inspire you to be the best you can be in life. This means trying new things, achieving
goals, and having the kind of life you dreamed of for yourself. They give us that push we
need to be better and greater.
28. You Will Get An Honest Opinion
Your best friends will always be totally honest with you. They know you very well and are
able to tell it like it is. So, next time your best friend suggests you have a change of heart
about something, give her credit for it and a big hug for the advice, because they have got
your best interests at heart.
29. Self-Esteem Boost
If our friends are genuine, they will help us develop our self-esteem, we will be happy
knowing we have someone in our life who thinks the world about us, someone who wants our

opinion on most things and values our company like no other. A friend who makes us feel
30. They Help Lower Stress
In a two-year study of suspected patients with coronary artery disease, it was found out that
those with strong support system were more likely to be alive after the two years elapsed. Not
only was that, their rates of hypertension and diabetes were also lower. One explanation of
this is that feeling lonely increases the production of the stress hormone in your brain, which
can lead to an increase in blood pressure and hormonal imbalances. Researchers have also
suggested that the nervous system actually registers social exclusion as physical pain.
31. They Help Good Habits Stick
With the aid of good friends we can learn new habits and drop the old ones. For instance, if
you happen to be on the overweight side, in order to shed a few pounds you will need all the
motivation you can get. Research has also shown that those who partner up to hit the gym are
more likely to follow through with a consistent workout routine than those who do not.
32. They Will Stand Up For You
By having friends there will not be shortage of those who had stand up to others on your
behalf. Even behind your back they had take a slug to the jaw to save face for you.
33. You Will Not Have It Any Other Way
They rule the world you live in, because they are your friends and everything and everyone
else comes second. They matter to you and make your world complete.

10 Very Important
Qualities a Good friend
must have
11 months ago
Gurleen Kaur
People & Lifestyle

Man is a social being. Ones life cannot me imagined without people

around him or her. We all need people in our everyday life to talk with,
share our joys, sorrows, views etc. Besides, the people of our family, we
go out and interact with people every day. And some people, we like are
called as our friends. Friends make life beautiful and worth living. They
add a certain kind of spark of life. You can talk to your friends about each
and everything; share your deepest secrets and even your stupid little
everyday stories.
We make friends throughout life, in play school, school, college, office, just
everywhere. As we grow through different phases in life, we meet new
people and make new friends and do not necessarily give up on old
friends. It all depends on how strong the bond of your friendship is.
Friends are always there to guide and support you through the ups and
downs of your life. They are the people who are always there to lend a
helping hand to you.
I personally feel that friends are the biggest strength of a person. There is
a special bonding we have with each of our friends. Sometimes, I find no
difference between my friends and family. Yes, my friends are my family,
not by blood relation, but by heart.
Friends come and go and in life, but what is important is that how long
friendship lasts. Sometimes, it may be a few months, a few years or
sometimes forever. Everybody wants friends to be in their life forever. Let
us find out the best qualities the person you call your best friend
should have!

10. Sharing is caring!

Yes, sharing is indeed one of the qualities your best friends should have.
You should be able to share each and everything with each other. Little

kids share their crayons, toys. Elders share their joys, sorrows, opinion.
Not only share of opinion, best buddies share things too! Like clothes,
accessories, notes, books, chocolates, coffee, you and your best friend
should not hesitate or have second thoughts about sharing these things
with each other. Because after all, sharing is caring. Your friend should be
able to lend you little things which you urgently need. It is therefore
rightly said that a friend in need is a friend indeed.

9. Trust and Loyalty.

No one ever wants their friends to bitch about them behind their back.
That is just so very disgusting. Friendship is a very special bond which
stands on the pillars of trust and loyalty. You should be able to share your
deepest secret with your best friend without the fear of the secret being
leaked. If you dont feel that your friend is loyal to you, what is the whole
point of spending time or being friends with that person? A true friendship
is a one where you can trust each other and know that your friend will
always be loyal to you.

8. Personal Adviser.
Who the hell needs a counselor/adviser when you have a best friend with
you? A best friend should be a one who guides you to the right path,
knows what is good and what is bad for you. A friend should be always be
there to advice on as little things as deciding what to wear for the party
next week and on big things such as deciding what career move or what
college is best for you. Your friend should never ever hesitate to advice
you on your personal or professional matters. After all, for most of the
people, friends are the first one whom they approach for advice. The right
friends and the right advice from them makes life so much better!

7. Listener.
For all those sad and gloomy days when we are feeling low, a best friend
is always ready to listen to our problems. Of course, your friend would not
surely have all the solutions or answers to your problems or what to do
next. But, they give you a sense of belonging that you are not alone and
they are always there for you. A good friend is a one in front of whom you
can pour your heart out without any hesitation. And also, they listen with
interest keeping their phones aside, just concentrating on you at that

6. Selfless Always ready to

Having a friend who is selfless and sees nothing when it comes to helping
you, then I tell that you have the right friend, buddy! A good friend is the
one who is always ready to help you in the difficult phase of your life
without expecting anything in return. They make your problems their own
and act accordingly in a way which they feel is the best for you.
Selflessness doesnt mean that your friends should always sacrifice things
for you. They have their own life and problems too which maybe you
wouldnt know.

5. Cheers you up.

Nothing can beat spending quality time with your best friend full of
hilarious jokes, giggles and laughter. Friends add happiness to life. They
are always ready to cheer you up when you are sad by making stupid

faces, telling lame jokes, tickling you and what not! Yes obviously, they do
share your pain, but dont like it when you remain sad for too long. They
make you forget all your problems and add colors to your life. My life is so
very unimaginable without my friends!

4. Knows you inside out.

A best friend is the one who knows you like no one else in the world does.
You people can literally talk through expressions without saying a word.
You two look at something or someone and instantly know what the other
is thinking and then share an evil smile. They know you so well that you
cannot hide anything from them. They will notice even the slightest
change in your expressions and will instantly know that something is
wrong with you.

3. Forgiving.
It is human nature to have difference in opinion and views sometimes
resulting in disputes. Friends also fight, sometimes, a lot. I personally have
indulged is so many fights with my friends, but the bond never broke
down. Touch wood! A good friend is a one who forgives his/her friends
without making any impact of the dispute on the friendship. You and your
friend should have such a bond that no dispute can make you two grow
apart. Rather, after each fight or misunderstanding, your bond should
grow even stronger.

2. Straightforward.
I totally love straightforward people. Who would want diplomatic friends?
Who would not want an honest opinion from their friends? No one! Friends

are the one whom we can trust and depend on easily. My friends act as
my stylists, counselor, sisters and just everything! Shopping with them is
so much fun. It is great to have people in life that are straightforward and
know what is not good for me. If I try on a dress or a top and it doesnt
suit me, my friends come straightforward and say You look horrible and I
so very appreciate their honest opinion. I feel like I have people in my life
that I can count on for anything.

1. Not Judgmental at all.

Your best friend knows you very well and would never judge you on your
mistakes or wrong decisions in the past. You can tell your friends your
stupidest stories, your silly mistakes and still your friend would love you
for who you are, rather than saying Eww, you did that? Arent you
ashamed of yourself? Instead they would scold you and then hug you!
They will make you feel that you are never ever alone and will stand along
with you all the way.