RUNNING HEADER: Autoethnography

Autoethnography
Katie Cochran
University of Memphis HIAD 7444
Dr. Wilson
Spring 2015

Cochran, 1

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Who am I? What do I stand for? Where did I come from? Do I have a past that is
relevant to the world, or am I just out here floating in a big bad world with no past to lean
on? These are questions and feelings that many people have in the course of their life
span, and questions that I too have asked myself a time or two. When someone is first
asked to describe themselves or talk about their life, what seems to be an easy task is
quickly turned daunting as the ideas pop around your mind of am I interesting enough?
or the notorious response ive lived a very average life!. As I sat down and began to
collect my thoughts, these thoughts ran through my mind... until I realized that we all
have a story to tell. This is my story, and I am thankful to be given the opportunity to give
it.
My great-great-great grandparents immigrated to the United States from the
Netherlands. When they arrived, they settled in unchartered territory in Middle
Tennessee in a town they later named Danville, Tennessee. As they improved the
town, they built a hotel, a bed and breakfast, and a shop. As their town grew and the
population grew, one problem rested with the location of the town: it was in line for the

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Tennessee Valley Authority to diminish and turn into a dam. Though my ancestors
protested and cried foul, stopping the TVA is no easy feat.. and their town was
destroyed. My family had to essentially start over from nothing other than a few dollars
from the government of the state of Tennessee. And that is where my story begins, and
that shortened version of my ancestors history is what has guided me and leads me to
the point of my life that I am at now. Thought I didnt meet those family members that we
living in Danville, I have often heard stories about the members of my family that shaped
my thoughts, actions, and work ethic.
Born a few hours away from what used to be Danville, I was born in Memphis on
October 26, 1990. My parents are each from the state of Tennessee as well, and though
ive lived in Mississippi, Tennessee, and Texas; I like to think of myself mainly as a mid
southerner, and I am proud to say that I am from this portion of the country.
As a child, I was raised by my divorced, yet each remarried, parents. I was raised
actively in the church and was fortunate enough to have divorced parents that believed
in co-parenting myself and my brother. When I moved to Dallas, Texas in fifth grade, I
was given the ability to see the world in a different perspective. A perspective that id
never seen before-- a perspective from big city living. This was the first time I was
shown that there is life outside of Memphis, Tennessee; and there is a lot that I can do
to impact the world, along with the rest of the world. I guess it would be most fair to say

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that my move to Dallas, Texas began my thought processes of wanting to make a

positive impact on the world and wanting to do it from an educational standpoint.
It was while I was in Texas throughout my Middle School years that I spent one
week each summer with my grandfather and grandmother, Jim Fowler and Janet Smith.
My grandfather spent his whole career in higher education as a professor, and my
grandmother had also spent her whole career in higher education, and was the
President of Rich Mountain Community College in Mena, Arkansas, and is now the
president of Columbia State Community College in Columbia, Tennessee. Throughout
my weeks there working on their farm, spending time on their college campuses, and
learning life lessons that only grandparents can teach, my passion for education began
to be tossed around in my mind and my heart. But it wouldnt be until later in my life
when I lock in on that passion and begin to pursue it.
I graduated from Arlington High School in 2009, and began my college career at
Southwest Tennessee Community College until I decided it was time to go to the
University level when I began my time at the University of Memphis Lambuth Campus.
While attending classes and living on campus at the Lambuth Campus, I became highly
involved. I started off as a tour guide, and then became an orientation guide, and
became more and more involved with smaller campus initiatives, and that is when I
found my passion.

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The more involved I became on a growing campus, the more I wanted to impact
the students presently on the campus and also those that would join the campus in the
future. In December of 2014, I graduated from the University of Memphis with my
bachelors degree in Psychology, only to continue my school career by pursuing my
masters degree in higher education administration in hopes of being someone that
would one day make a difference on a college campus, much like the faculty and staff of
the University of Memphis- Lambuth Campus had done for me and many of those
around me.
So, what does all this mean when you ask me: who is Katie Cochran? And
sometimes I have to even sit back myself and wonder exactly who I am, and then I
come to the same conclusion each time: I am a rich and wonderful combination of my
own uniqueness mixed with all the traits of my ancestors that came from the
Netherlands, my grandparents that taught me how to work hard to grow a tomato and
also how to read hard in order to fall in love education, and a little bit of Texan,
Mississippian, and most importantly, Memphian. All of these factors combined have not
only made me, but they have guided me to become the person I am now and who I will
be as life goes on. I hold true to strong convictions such as maintaining an active
membership in the church, strong family ties, and a sense of self that I will always carry
with me no matter what situation I may face.

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My beliefs vary from conservative to moderate to liberal on multiple points in life,

ranging from politics to religion and beyond. A lot of my beliefs have been shaped and
formed by my family, friends, and the time period Ive been alive; but narrowed down,
focused in, and finalized by my own personal thoughts and thought processes. I believe
in small governments and big churches. I believe in the power of the people and the
power of goodwill. I believe in freedom of speech, religion, and education. I believe in all
of these freedoms for all the people living across all lands. Though these are my beliefs
and I hold fast to them, I allow my beliefs to form my values in life. Values to me are
another word for asking what do you stand for in life?, and while they go hand in hand,
the way that I carry them out in my daily life varies.
My values are strong and lead to my convictions in life. I stand for perseverance,
integrity, learning, respect, honesty, power, contentment, love, and finding inspiration in
all corners of the world. I live my values out on a regular basis by spreading them in my
actions towards people that I meet. I think its important that everyone has values, but
also that all of those values are consistently carried out in words and deeds. Without
actions, words, and lifestyles backing up beliefs and values, who are we as humans,
and as humanitarians?
I believe that my cultural background has shaped me into the person that I am
today. Though the story at the beginning about my ancestors in Danville, Tennessee

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seemed random and as if it possibly didnt fit in that location, I often tell it when
discussing who I am because that story defines my life and my families existence. When
my family could have given up and packed all their belongings and given up on the idea
of freedom in America when their town they created was taken from them, instead they
worked harder and longer to create another form of success and to keep on keeping
on as the old saying goes. And that is what I have done my whole life. When things
happened that put me a few steps behind, I persevered and I maintained a level head
and thought process to get me through the ordeal much like my family did before I was
even thought of. I am proud to be from a family that showed such resilience in the eye of
a storm, and I will always refer to that story when discussing my culture, my past, and
how I became the person that I am today.
To answer the question that I started off asking to begin this essay, I asked Who
am I?, this question has indeed been answered. Though I feel that I am still growing
and learning, these topics discussed will continue to mold me and shape me along with
the journey that I face in life currently and those journeys in my future. I will always
remember where I came from and be thankful that I have a story to tell.. and that story is
ever evolving in something even greater and more marvelous than previously expected!

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Being born and spending over half of my life in Memphis, Tennessee, I always felt
acclimated to diversity and multiple cultures. After all, throughout my time in grade
school and even into college, I always had classmates that were made up of many
different cultures ranging from African Americans, to Asians, to Hispanics and many
more. As well as the multitude of cultures that I have witnessed over my life span, I also
have witnessed a multitude of world religions as well as denominations in Christianity.
Being from such a diverse city, I felt that I knew diversity and I knew what one needs to
know in order to get by in life; but as I have learned since grade school, there is much
more to being cultural than simply knowing or having friends and acquaintances that are
different cultures and backgrounds than you. Being cultural includes being able to
understand where someone comes from and having the ability to respect it, no matter
how similar or different it may be from your personal viewpoint due to your culture.
As I discussed in the previous section of this auto ethnography, I was taught as a
child how to work hard and how to work for what I want in life. I believe that one of my
strongest and most positive features of myself is my diligence to complete all tasks

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before me in order to further myself and my career. This impacts my daily life and my
relationships with others around me deeply. What this does for me is it gives me a sense
of constantly wanting to help those around me to succeed as well. What this leads to for
those around me is that I try to surround myself with positive, goal oriented people just
like myself. I also do my best trying to ensure that I am a positive influence in the lives of
those around me. My variety of friends is large, but my closest circle of friends is small.
The difference is that those that I let in and those that I tell my career goals to, my
aspirations, and how I want to impact the world of higher education is a different group
than someone that I am friends with just because we have similar personalities and get
along well.
Two quotes that play along with this side of me are: 1) Opposites attract, and 2)
Birds of a feather will always flock together. While these quotes each have two
separate messages, they each represent the internal battle that I am consistently
engaged in. When I reflect on my life and those around me, I often wonder if im doing
what I need to do in order to be someone that impacts the people that I meet. Am I
making a difference, or am I someone that adds to the problem? I think that the biggest
and toughest issues that someone could face, and I have found myself facing it, is
based behind the notion that we need to always stick together with our kinds of people.
Even as I just stated, I sometimes have been known to want to succeed and want to do

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as well as possible that I put up a barrier between myself and someone else that doesnt
seem as goal oriented as I feel that I am. I think that these habits can create unhealthy
social arrangements. What habits such as these do is sometimes give off the notion that
unless you seem to have it all together and that you are always on the ball, someone
that seems to be more successful or more put together wont appreciate the input that
you can provide in their life. I feel that all people that I meet and interact with can leave
an impact in my life, sometimes the impact is simply presented in different terms or on
different occasions. While birds of a feather typically do flock together, I think the most
socially healthy thing someone can do for themselves is to look for the opposite that
they attract and to let that person in on the depth of their life, and look to see where they
can impact the person and where the person impacts them. That, to me, is the perfect
definition of diversity (letting those in that seem to be the complete opposite of you in
order to understand yourself and them on a deeper level).
One of biggest and most noticeable results of my beliefs about diversity has led
me to having an open mind in scenarios that some wonder why I do have an open mind
in. For instance, when I observe an action that is unjust, racist or sexist; I often times
want to offer help to each side. In other words, I think its important to understand why
racism occurs, why sexism occurs, and why society (at times) deems it acceptable and
doesnt intercede in order to stop it. I think that this being my automatic reaction to these

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actions is due in part to my background in psychology and my eagerness to understand

the who and the why questions. While there are positive aspects to this thought
process, there are also negatives. One of the negatives is that I often times end up in
situations that I shouldnt always end up in all because I want to help all sides to grow
from their debate and to understand that all sides can be listened to and respected.
As a child, I read the book To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee. One quote
always stuck out to me, and even to this day, I find myself repeating the quote and doing
my best to allow the attitude of the quote to be displayed throughout my life. The quote
is found in chapter three, and Attitcus tells Scout that until you climb into someones
skin and walk around in it, you dont really understand that person and you wont ever
truly be able to consider things from that persons point of view. This quote has always
stuck out to me more than others because it truly gets to the point of what its like to
know, respect, and nurture any identity that surrounds you in life. While it is physically
impossible to literally climb into someones skin and to walk around in it; its not
impossible to get to know someone well enough and to develop such a relationship that
you feel like you could live a day in their life. How often do we reach out to those around
us and ask them about their heritage, their identity? How often do we reach across to
someone that looks completely different than us and has different mannerisms,
characteristics, skin complexions, accents, and say to them tell me about you as

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opposed to automatically telling them about ourselves. As a child, and to this day, that
specific quote will always stick out in my mind. It will guide me, just as it has since I read
it for the first time in sixth grade. And as I try to live out the meaning of the quote, I will
do all that I can to get to know those around me. And not just get to know them, but to
actually converse with them and to let them know that I want to understand them, I want
to understand where they come from.
Another book that I read while still young that has guided my opinion on dealing
with society and those around me that may appear to be different from me was a short
story by Stephen King, later turned into a movie, The Shawshank Redemption. The
story was about an innocent man that is sentenced to two consecutive life terms in
prison, but finds a way out; all while befriending a man that was not innocent, but really
impacted other prisoners, and the main character so much that once he was out of
prison, he left the man money in order to allow him to take a bus to the Texas/Mexico
border, where he waited for him in order to them to finish their lives in a place that
entitled them to have the ultimate freedom. The story takes place in the Southern
portion of America in the 1940s, a highly unsettled time between the black population
and the white population. The murderer was a black man, and the innocent man was a
white man. They became friends that they had never had before, they became each
others source of motivation for wanting to get out of the prison life they each had

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become accustomed to, and borderline institutionalized, and to live the life that they
each felt they deserved. While the story sounds simple, the relationship between the
two prisoners was so in depth and so surreal to imagine these two men from completely
different backgrounds, different lifestyles outside of the prison, and yet they each
managed to look past all differences and truly show what it means to give someone
unconditional support. What this story has done for me in my life is shown me that
despite all circumstances that come up in life, no level of difference between myself and
the person next to me can stop a relationship from forming. The story also showed me
that when you allow someone on your side, even in the toughest times of your life, that
one relationship can sometimes change the whole course of your life if you allow them
to teach you and to motivate you as you find your way through that particular portion of
your life.
The two works discussed, To Kill a Mockingbird, and The Shawshank
Redemption, each subconsciously showed me at a young age that diversity is not a bad
thing. They also showed me that sometimes diversity shows up in the strangest corners
of our lives, and these corners shouldnt be shunned. Both of the works I discussed had
one major underlying theme, and that theme is hope. Hope is found when members of
society from all angles are able to look at eachother and to recognize that we all have a
key to the door of knowledge, strength, happiness, and success; and when we are all

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able to unlock those doors together, diversity and unity occur, and these are two forces
that can never be reckoned against.
I believe that my level of understanding of diversity is moderately high, but I also
am willing to admit that diversity is a subject that is always changing and always
improving. I understand the concept of diversity, and I feel that I have diversity in my life
when it pertains to those around me and my ability to relate to them; but I am positive
that there is much more to learn and to see as I continue to search for diversity and
ways to spread the positivity that arrive when diversity is open and welcomed.
I feel that the field of higher education is one of the few fields that explores the
realm of diversity on such a high level that some of the largest higher education
institutions in our country put a lot of their resources towards researching methods of
introducing diversity to their students, but also a lot of resources goes towards
implementing policies on diversity. With that said, I feel that the more I learn in the field
of higher education, the more my knowledge, understanding, and level of understanding
will grow in the field of diversity. Its vital that we, as professionals in the field of higher
education, spread the message of diversity, not only to ourselves and those immediately
around us; but to the campuses that we work for and all students, prospective and
current included. Once every mission statement for every university across the country
includes key words such as diversity, and once the workers of that campus spread the

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message of diversity, and once that message is then portrayed from the students to their
surrounding community, whether it is on or off campus; then I think that my level of
understanding in this subject will be to the level it is. I will continue to research, learn,
and grow; and diversity will always be my most important message given when dealing
with those around me.

When I imagine myself speaking with people about diversity, words and phrases
such as affirmative action, equality, and race relations begin to appear in my mind. I initially
started this assignment with the intention of persuading those that I interviewed to take those
thoughts that are parallel to diversity and I wanted those words out of their vocabulary. My goal
was to allow them to freely discuss the topic of diversity and how it impacts their life in all
aspects and how it has had an impact on their life in the past. I also wanted to understand how
two people from two races, yet the same city, perceived diversity to be. I worked this out by
discussing the topic of diversity with two people, one whom I knew very well, and one that I
didnt know at all coming into the experience. Both of the interviewees are from the city of
Memphis and/or the suburbs around Memphis, but it is important to note that they are from two
very different portions of the city. Whereas one is from a lower income neighborhood, the other
is from an upperclass neighborhood. They each attended public schools, though one of the public
schools is known for excelling in academics and the other is known for excellent athletics, but
not so much academics. As I explored the topic of diversity with these two highly diverse

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individuals, I came to some strong conclusions, some highly expected and some completely
unexpected.
I interviewed my two participants in very formal settings that evolved into informal
settings in an attempt to create open dialogue, free thinking and a highly non-judgmental
atmosphere. My two participants were University of Memphis students, one was an
undergraduate student that I am good friends with and the other was a graduate student that Ive
only met twice, and each of those times was to interview her. For the privacy of the two girls I
interviewed and due to the subject, each one of the girls preferred to only be named by her first
name only.
The first girl that I interviewed is Maddie, and Maddie is a junior biology major at the
University of Memphis. Maddie is from a suburb just outside of Memphis, Tennessee, and has
traveled a minimal amount of times, but feels that she is well researched in other cultures than
her own. I know Maddie very well, we met roughly four years ago through mutual friends and
we have been good friends ever since then. The interview was held in an outside study area
outside of the library, where we had a rather informal conversation. We started off the
conversation discussing the meaning of diversity and multiculturalism. Maddies initial
definition of diversity was to understand and respect that others around you arent of the same
background or thought processes in regards to religion, politics and policies. I started off the
conversation after asking for her definition of the word, I asked her to immediately state the next
3 words that popped up in her mind after she heard the word diversity. She stated that the next
three words in her mind were 1) opportunity, 2) different and 3) sharing. I then allowed the
conversation to flow in any direction that came naturally, and Maddie began to freely speak. As
she spoke without restraining herself, she stated that coming from a small and majority

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Caucasian-filled town, she was raised to respect cultures other than white Americans, but that it
came as a struggle when she got in crowds at school that spoke with hints of racism in their
comments.
As the tone in her voice began to change, Maddie spoke of times in her high school when
she saw self segregation between the whites in her high school and the blacks in her school. One
of her comments that stuck out to me was that one of her biggest regrets in high school was that
she never broke the mold and stepped out of her comfort zone of her friends and never joined the
black table or the Hispanic table as they were called in the cafeteria. When I asked her why
she didnt step out and join other groups, she simply said that it wasnt something that was done
unless you had a specific reason to. She went on to explain that it wasnt spoken of and no one
did it. Even if we played sports with someone of another race, we didnt really eat with them at
lunch or talk to them in the halls. We werent trying to be racist, but when I look back on it now,
I see that we were being racist; every race was discounting the other races.
As Maddie continued to explain herself and her view on diversity, I found that much of
her life was spent simply ignoring diverse situations around her. As many do in Memphis, she
spoke of the parts of towns that she would never venture into, all the while explaining that it
didnt make her racist, it just made her cautious. While she explained this, she also explained that
along with diverse situations comes learning, sharing of values and growth for opportunity. As
she spoke and I listened, I couldnt help but to wonder if she had ever truly placed herself in a
diverse situation; and if she did what would happen.
The next person that I interviewed was Anna, a graduate student in an online MBA
program. Anna graduated from the University of Memphis and is from the inner city of
Memphis. I met Anna through a friend when I explained to our mutual friend that I wanted to

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meet someone thats truly diverse and open minded, but that I couldnt know them very well.
Thus, I was introduced to Anna, and we began our discussion of diversity rather soon after
meeting. What struck me about Anna was her ability to discuss race relations, diversity, and for
her to explain the areas that she was self admitted ignorant about when it comes to other races
and other cultures. When I asked her for the first three words to pop in her mind after hearing the
word diversity she said 1) negative, 2) Michael Brown and 3) Ignored. I then asked her to
elaborate on her three words (as they were words I didnt plan to hear) and I asked her what she
meant by the three words and why she thought of diversity in a negative light.
Anna started off explaining to me that to her, talking about diversity is what causes
negative race relations and what spurns much of the tension between the two majority races in
Memphis (the black race and the white race). She then went on to discuss the point that, from
where she is from in Memphis, you dont typically discuss races or groups outside of your group
because if you do, they often times look at you as if youre trying to be like them. She also said
that when she graduated college and moved out of her inner city home into a suburb, some of her
friends told her that she wasnt acting black anymore and that she would come back a few
shades lighter as she said that they stated it. Anna then said that it is because of comments such
as those previously mentioned that so many in her former neighborhood would be wary of
becoming friends with a white person too quickly. Thus leads to her point that simply discussing
diversity is something that isnt done and is often times ignored in a way to keep the population
of her neighborhood feeling comfortable.
Anna then used the point of diversity being negative to lead into a lengthy discussion of
Michael Brown. She stated that if the police officer were to have been educated or grown and
raised in a neighborhood such as Michael Browns, he would have understood his defensive

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attitude toward a white, middle aged police officer. In the same sense, she also stated that if
Michael Brown had more exposure to the body language and overall language of a white, middle
aged police officer, then he would have been able to handle the situation in a different, more
positive way. When Anna completed her thought on the subject, I asked her how she thought that
the police officer or Michael Brown could have handled the situation differently had they been
exposed to each others types previous to their first encounter if their neighborhood discouraged
open communication with members of outside groups, as she just explained a few minutes prior.
She then stated that while other races and cultures are not discussed, to have open dialogue with
them is not a negative thing if youre in a public setting and its welcomed by the environment
around you. When I asked her to give more detail on that statement, she simply said that she
couldnt think of another way to word it, but to just believe her. Believe her, I did and still do,
mainly due to her deep sense of understanding of the world around her.
Annas last word that she focused on was ignored. She stated that she feels like
diversity isnt discussed as much in the current day because people dont give it the time that
they used to give the topic because it doesnt seem as important in societies eyes. She stated that
her previous two points lead up to this one because they are proof of society ignoring the aspects
and dynamics of diversity. She also stated that if diversity was a subject that was thought of in a
more positive manner, it would be discussed more, and that would lead to a much more open and
positive world when people encounter other cultures, ideas, and races. My final question to Anna
was If you could say one sentence about diversity and have it repeated by others in society,
what would it be? to which her response was quit being scared of things that are different than
you, which I felt summed up our conversation perfectly.

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When I started the process of deciding who to interview and how to interview, I sought
out two people that would offer different opinions on the term and the idea surrounding diversity.
What I found was that, while outwardly their opinions seemed different; what the real case was is
that they both actually seemed wary and slightly scared of truly venturing out and discovering
diversity, as I encouraged both to do at the end of our interviews. I did not expect Anna to
inadvertently discuss her fears, because I figured that being from the inner city of very diverse
city that she would understand and appreciate the concept of diversity. Instead, I met someone
that see the positive correlation of diversity with interaction, but is held back by her past and her
childhood of negative images being put into her head by those older than her. With Maddie, I
found that she openly discussed her fears of diversity; but didnt feel comfortable acting on those
fears. Perhaps this is due to their internal fears, but it also seems as if much of it is fueled by their
environment. When I initially asked each person interviewed to speak the first three words that
come to mind after hearing the word diversity, I immediately saw a change in them that signified
to me that the conversation made them uncomfortable, but the one that seemed most
uncomfortable was Maddie, who was more vocal about her regrets and mistakes in dealing with
members of populations different than hers.
I chose my two interviewees by figuring out exactly what I wanted to accomplish with
this portion of the auto-ethnography. I wanted to speak with people from the same area, but
different environments that they were raised in. I thought of Maddie because I knew that she was
open to discussing diversity due to other conversations we had, and I chose Anna because she
was referred to me by another friend that told me that she was very open minded and intelligent
and enjoyed conversations dealing with topics such as diversity. I feel that I accomplished what I
set out to do, but what I found was not what I expected. I found out, first and foremost, that the

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suburban white female and the inner city black female had a lot more in common than one may
think when initially hearing about this project. I also found that, by the end of this assignment,
some of the advances that I felt society made in terms of dealing with diversity and differences in
people are being hindered by current members of society. Though each one of my interviewees
seemed to have the same general understanding and idea behind diversity, their habits in dealing
with it and their methods of understanding and embracing it is what will make the difference in
society and societal standards.2121
Until we open our minds to the diversity around us, we will maintain a sense of being lost
when dealing with it. Martin Luther King Jr. once stated that Darkness cannot drive out
darkness: Only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that, and I feel
that this quote could be found to be highly useful and beneficial as society continues to explore
the topic of diversity. We must not forget what was done before our time, and we must give our
children and grandchildren light and love when encountering and dealing with diversity and
diverse situations. As society begins and continues to explore areas of diversity, positive change
will occur and we will see a shift in societal tendencies. I find it to be highly important for
conversations such as these to take place, not only on college campuses, but also in the world
that we live. As we dig and create open lines of communication, we will create a generation of
open minds, hearts and eyes; and that is when hate will be driven out, in the words of Martin
Luther King Jr.

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I can remember my first week living on a college campus, the shock that I faced
when I was invited to my first college party, or the fear that I felt when I was handed a
syllabus that had more than a typical high school syllabus has, or the excitement I felt as
I began to form a group of friends that I related to on multiple facets of our lives. But
what I didnt know was that college, from my undergraduate years to my graduate years,
would give me a chance to reflect on my life and what I wanted from life. The longer that
I have learned and the more information that fills my mind, the more thankful I become
for higher education and what it has done for not only me, but others that truly take
positive advantage of the system. Throughout my time as a learner in the higher
education system, I have found myself becoming more aware of diverse situations and
diverse people around me due to the knowledge that I have been given in dealing with
diversity and how to ensure that diversity
Who am I, really, though? Right now, I am a student, a learner. In the future,
though, I will be an educator and a leader on a college campus. I will be a student
affairs professional, someone that has the ability to meet students where they are and to
guide them in their journey as they learn who they are; much as I have done over the
course of this assignment.

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As I have researched and written about multiculturalism, I have come to some

deep conclusions about myself. The first is that I am not quite as multiculturally
competent as I once found myself to be. In fact, I am nowhere near where I should be,
but I am always learning. I have found that the world is continuously evolving and
adapting, and as a future student affairs professional, I must do the same. In the words
of Jacqueline Woodson, diversity is about all of us, and about us having to figure out
how to walk through this world together. As I grow in my career, I feel that I will refer to
that quote often in my working with students that may not understand me, or whom I
dont always understand. Ive learned so much from this assignment about myself and
the world around me, and I feel that the one thing left to do at this point is to my past
and allow it to direct my future in student affairs work.
As a child growing up in Memphis, I was faced with different cultures, religions,
ethnicities and more. I felt that simply being around people with different histories than
me made me understanding and open minded. Instead, I have learned that simply being
in class and sitting next to someone from another country does not make someone
culturally competent. It is the true understanding and eagerness to understand
someones differences that lead us to becoming culturally competent. In order to allow
myself to learn and to grow culturally, I have found that I need to place myself in more
diverse situations on a day to day basis. This includes going to events on campus that I

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usually wouldnt feel comfortable at, or sitting at a table with students or staff that ive
never spoken to before or typically wouldnt speak to due to differences in lifestyles or
just out of comfort. As a student affairs professional, it is vital that we make these efforts
to get to know those around us on deeper levels in an effort to spread the positive
message of diversity to the students that we work with.
One avenue of doing this is to guide our students and to allow them to get out of
their comfort zone in order to watch them grow. But, how does someone sitting in a
student affairs office impact 18-22 year old students to get out of their comfort zone?
After all, our students are adults and can and typically will do what they want to do, and
not always what we want them to do. That is why, as a student affairs professional, I will
utilize the tools and resources that I obtained from this class and this assignment in
particular in an effort to assist them in their journey.
The portion of the authoethnography that taught me the biggest lesson and
allowed me to learn about myself was interviewing other students on the topic of
diversity. Not only was I given the ability to speak with a student that I didnt know well,
but I was also able to speak with a student that I do know well but I was given the
opportunity to understand the student on a hot topic such as diversity. This portion of
the assignment forced me out of my comfort zone in order to bring up topics dealing
with race relations and current topics that arent always easy to mention in casual

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conversations. But in fact, these are the issues that should be spoken of the most and
should be mentioned in our interactions with students. This can be completed by altering
conversations with students in a way that allows them to think outside of their comfort
zone, but also encouraging them to pass the message along to those they come in
contact with. I am confident that actions such as those mentioned above will lead to a
positive interaction and impression with students we interact with daily as student affairs
professionals.
Another portion of this multiculturalism class that allowed me to self examine and
to grow was the immersion project. I spent time attending events and interviewing
students and staff included in the organization, and had my eyes opened to some of the
portions of diversity that we dont always see when just observing an organization. As I
spoke with students from diverse backgrounds on the multicultural student association, I
was able to immerse myself in students lives that allowed me to learn more than I
thought possible at the beginning of the assignment. The most influential section of the
immersion project happened when I spoke to the president of the multicultural student
association who informed me that the number of members quadrupled in a matter of
three years. What that means to me is that society, no matter the age or location, always
wants to be informed and educated on matters like their own and those unlike their own.
As I spoke with students involved in the organization, I noticed that multiple students

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began to stand near myself and the person I was interviewing in order to make sure that
I understood the positive impact that the organization had on them personally. This not
only allowed me to see the positive impact that the organization had on the members,
but also allowed me to see that people from all walks of life were interested in a
multicultural and diverse organization.
The question still hangs, though; who am I, really? I still hold true to the values I
held upon entering this class, but I feel that my world view has been altered. I dont view
the topic of diversity or the topic of multiculturalism the same. I now look at these two
terms as growing terms and helping terms. I feel that I am diverse and full of variety, but
I yearn to be much more. So, I must ask the next question: who am I striving to be?
I am striving to one day become a dean of student affairs at a university. In order
to get there, I must strive to become a masters degree holder, and a PhD holder. In
order to look to the future, I must observe my past and respect it. I feel that I am still a
wonderful combination of my familys rich history, but that I am carving myself a future
just as much as Im allowing my past to define me. This includes hard work, long nights,
dedication to the higher education program, and belief in myself and those around me to
succeed. Without these attributes, I would not be where I am today as a learner.
I originally defined myself as this auto ethnography adventure started as a
hardworker who will keep on keeping on, and that is what I have done in life and it is

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what I will continue to do. One example from a recent point in my life is my graduate
school career. When I began to examine the idea of graduate school, the idea of
attending a masters program sounded nice, but I wasnt sure if I knew what I wanted to
do or how I wanted to obtain it. As I became more and more active as an undergraduate
student and I began to explore the portion of higher education that includes recruitment,
student activities and retention of students, the more that I became aware of my true
passion in life. I began to research graduate school programs, but I also began to
research statistics and facts about higher education that some students may not think to
research. The area that I have researched the most and feel most knowledgeable about
is how to retain students that feel un-included on a campus or students that begin to feel
burnt out on college. How do we use diverse techniques to diversify our student
population, and how does that allow us to retain our students when they are ready to
leave college behind and pursue new goals? As I have researched the subject, I have
found that student affair workers must allow themselves to be put in the middle of the
students in order to properly make an impact on the students time at the university,
encouraging retention and dropping levels of students feeling burnt out during their
college years. In order to do this, we must maintain diligence in pursuing students goals
but also in introducing students to new situations so that they consistently learn and
grow in their time in college. Part of this includes programming and teaching diversity

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and diverse situations to students, encouraging them to explore the world outside of
their particular box. If our students see these actions taking place on student affairs
administration level, then the encouragement for them to participate and challenge
themselves will allow them to strive for more and become life long learners, much like
what my college experience has and is currently doing for me.
As I have explored the topics that surround multiculturalism through this class
and this particular assignment, I have found that I am was not as aware of multicultural
issues in America as I previously thought that I was, but I also found an interest in the
issues that currently surround our country dealing with multiculturalism and diversity. I
have also found that only through research and learned knowledge on the subject will I
grow in my dealing with the world. I have found myself to not only be a culturally sound
individual, but I have found myself to be a searcher for the facts, keys and conclusion to
the cultural strife we face when interacting with others around us from other parts of the
world.
So, to answer the question who am I, really?; I give myself one word that sums
the rest of me up. Searcher. I am a searcher of knowledge, a searcher of wisdom, a
searcher of growth in the student affairs field, and a searcher of peace and the answers
that bring peace to those around me, especially when I begin my work with students and
coworkers. Through my searching, I will find that though I will never know all the facts or

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answers, I will continue to learn and grow in my dealings with diversity and
multiculturalism.
This course and the assignments that were included in the course have taught
me to continue searching for diverse situations and to allow myself to learn from them in
order to better my professional self. I will carry the knowledge that I have gained about
myself as I leave the course, and I will always consider myself to be a searcher; a
portion of myself that was made evident as I worked my way through assignments in
completion of the course. As I venture into the world of student affairs, these truths will
be carried alongside me and made evident in my dealings with students, faculty and
staff.
The definition of search is try to find something by looking or otherwise seeking
carefully and thoroughly; and when interacting with multicultural and diversity issues, I
am confident that this portion of me will always prove to be beneficial and positive as I
continue my journey of life long learning; and one day I hope to find that those that I
interact with will one day, too, become searchers.