Mendoza 1

Paul Mendoza
English 115
Professor Beadle
rd
October 3 , 2016
The Unwritten Rules
Society has constructed gender throughout the ages with false ideas about how
each person should act. Society has never taken into account the possibility that all
people fall into more than -two categories of gender; they have misconstrued all the types
of gender to coincide with a persons sex regardless of the persons feelings and
personality. It is obvious that gender has been shaped by peoples surroundings and is
constantly forced upon them since birth through their family, community, and clothing;
however it is becoming more acceptable to be honest with oneself in todays world
through social media, entertainment, and growing LGBTQ communities. Articles written
by Renzetti, Curan, and Hubbard state the differences with gender and sex. They show
that society has socially constructed gender in a way that does not allow individuals to
express themselves freely. They all agree that gender was meant to keep people within the
social norm. People are able to find a solace in communities created by those who are
ousted by society for going against the gender norms and disrupting its flow.
Society has placed boundaries and limitations on how children should be raised,
forcing children to be branded as a girl or a boy. Claire Renzetti and Daniel Curran state,
Toys for boys tend to encourage exploration, manipulation, invention, construction,
competition, and aggression. In contrast, girls toys typically rate high on manipulability,
but also creativity, nurturance, and attractiveness (Renzetti/Curran 82.) Boys and girls

Mendoza 2
have specific types of toys that they should play with, in turn planting societys idea of
gender into these kids. A friend of mine, Blake, grew up in a Southern Christian
household, although growing up a gay male he often found himself being forced to play
with girls toys because his father saw his femininity as a weakness and joke. He found
that he was different and was ousted from his family in a way because of this; his father
had a plethora of ways to treat his son with disrespect and mock his gender and did so
everyday. In addition another friend of mine, who is a girl, would play with toys usually
advertised for boys. She would play with army men and transformers yet her parents
would not pay mind to this too much. In the eyes of society, girls are either less likely to
stray from the gender norm so as a result they are able to play with toys advertised for the
opposite sex without much attention drawn to them by their parents. Composing Gender
tells about a study in which parents cared immensely more if their boy plays with dolls
rather than more masculine toys. The parents treated the boys somewhat rougher than the
girls in an attempt to make sure they are growing up, as society wants men to be.
Familys ideals, values, and standard of living are all things that children take in
as soon as they are born, which shapes who they are as humans. Renzetti and Curran
state, ... parents associate their childs sex with specific personality and behavioral traits
is further evidenced by the effort they put into ensuring that others identify their childs
sex correctly (Renzetti and Curran 77.) The two authors have performed studies that

have shown exactly this, they will try to raise their child according to its sex. In the 21

st

century people are attempting to raise their children in a neutral way, unbiased towards
either gender allowing the child to realize and choose who they are. Most people are not
given the opportunity to choose their gender and instead are being assigned roles by

Mendoza 3
society while completely neglecting whom they are in order to fit in to the social norm.
Children do not get a choice to identify as any specific gender; they are forced into one
by their parents. Parents often dress their children differently because of their sex and
expect them to comply with this gender. No one has the right to tell another human being
who they are, that is up to that individual. It is a basic human right to express yourself as
you are and to not be forced into a specific class because society deems that appropriate.
Our communities and the people surrounding us have a very large impact on
individuals because no one wants to be a social pariah. In there is a story about a
transgender person being harassed by another person because they are a transgender. The
trans person states, My gender expression in that public space offended his sense of
appropriate public behavior and he acted to sanction that violation in as public a fashion
as possible (Doran 58.) This behavior is very prevalent in the lives of trans people and
those who do not comply with the gender roles. People will do everything they can in
order to put others in their place and force them in to one of the two main genders.
Obviously as humans we have the right to express ourselves just as this man did but the
fact that he was offended because of another person expressing their identity is not right.
He chose to embarrass this person simply because their identity did not comply with the
normality in todays culture. These norms are something that is hard to be changed,
even though very brave individuals come out, and have disrupted the norm there is still
much to come. Hubbard states, norms are self-fulfilling prophecies that do not merely
describe how we are but prescribe how we should be (Hubbard 47.) Hubbard is saying
that because of the boundaries society has created it is hard to leave these two genders
and express how one truly might feel. You are trapped by society whether it is wanted or

Mendoza 4
not. Although the world is changing and people outside the gender norm are being more
widely accepted, there are still those whom disagree with the fact that there are more than
two genders. Although I have never experienced this heinous behavior it is prevalent
through social media and its relativity in the world today is saddening. All of these
articles share the same tone; they are trying to convey to the reader that there is more out
there, in the world, than what society is confining you to see. Their purpose is to educated
the ignorant and hopefully pull them towards their view of the world and gender. These
authors believe that the world we are in is trapping people within these two genders and it
is hard to break through the walls it has put up.
Gender is a topic that many people neglect to bring up; it has never been
challenged like it has today. Since the flow was disrupted people obviously were against
the movement and belief that there are more than two genders. Genders are not
determined by sex, it is shaped by their experiences and surroundings since birth and is
brought upon them since birth through everything from clothes to family. It is still argued
with by people all over the world for different reasons whether it is because of religion or
just the personal belief that sex and gender are equal in meaning. This makes it difficult
for people to be honest with themselves, however the world is changing and becoming
more accepting. It is hitting turbulence and those caught in it cannot thrive but it is
happening less and less.

Mendoza 5
Citations
Groner, Rachael, John F. O'Hara, and Ruth Hubbard. "Rethinking Women's
Biology." Composing Gender. N.p.: n.p., n.d. 47. Print.Groner, Rachael, John F. O'Hara,
and Petra Doan. "Rethinking Women's
Biology." Composing Gender. N.p.: n.p., n.d. 58. Print.Groner, Rachael, John F. O'Hara,
Renzetti, and Curran. "Rethinking Women's
Biology." Composing Gender. N.p.: n.p., n.d. 77. Print.Groner, Rachael, John F. O'Hara,
Renzetti, and Curran. "Rethinking Women's
Biology." Composing Gender. N.p.: n.p., n.d. 88. Print.