The mind can operate a false identity - or an investment in the false.

We learn this as babies and toddlers as part of socialisation - so as to join in and become
part of the human world - which is not only acquiring physical capacity of existence, but of
being inducted to interior models of human beliefs, behaviours and realities. These models
all operate an overriding of the spontaneous nature with a 'self' consciousness of narrative
control - in different ways and of varying degrees.
We could agree to call these our 'separation trauma' and see that the mind's attempt to
control or feel guilt for issues of control, is one with its fragmentation and dissociation from
such pained conflict, which results in the assertion of levels of self presentation as the so
called waking conscious running sub-consciously operating behaviour patterns that operate
strategically to maintain unconsciousness of a negatively defining sense of self existence.
This works intra personally as interpersonally and is founded in a sense of transpersonal
separation, or lack of natural identification in one's total experience.
The complexity and entanglement of such evasions and defences, denials and diversions
operates largely beneath the conscious mind - though nothing is really hidden but through
the agreement to 'see' something else or not look there at all. In some teachings this
system or mind-defence is called the ego - because it is a construct within which attention
becomes trapped in its own thought - which is absurd and yet demonstrably evident in
belief and behaviour, because the investment in idea as true is the working belief from
which we then perceive and respond or react accordingly.
The ego is thus the belief something is wrong with you (with reality) and must be fixed.
But the source of the feeling of dissonance, wrongness, guilt, or sense of disconnect and
lack, is itself actively denied from awareness by insistence to SEE it outside yourself - to
PUT it away from what 'survives' of Self as the narrative sense of control over one's
experience - again - mostly NOT seeing the control of limitation being effected on one's
consciousness.
A working model works FOR a purpose. If the active default is set within hiding and
surviving the negative - then all things are being negatively defined - even those
seemingly positive. The resistance to accepting this is the original attempt to separate out
or dissociate from. Yet the direct noticing of the false -in act- is the spontaneous release of
investment as self. Whereas thinking ABOUT a self negative definition merely persists in it
regardless the 'good intentions' of making 'better'.
Waking up is NOT merely the breaking of the world-reality to reveal some nightmare
scenario of manipulative deceit and coercion. But that reflection IS energetically resonant
and correspondent to your own thought - whether conscious or 'hidden'. So we can USE
the feedback of our world experience for awakening to that within us that gives power of
support and allegiance and attraction to the negative scenarios we say we do not want or
enjoy AND STOP CHOOSING TO FEED and support that 'identity'.
But the primary awakener is the extending of a sense of WORTH to your world, to others
and to your Existence - and of course you have to ACCEPT for YOURSELF to extend and
share in it. This is THE step from which all else follows and without which all else is in vain.
YOU have to allow and accept yourself love. Not in terms of the world's idea of 'love' but
truly accept in place of self-rejection. Giving and receiving are two polarities of a greater
reality that identifies you perfectly in what I can only call the act of Creation - but the mind
cannot 'get' this - though it can be given through you and reflected to you as a witnessing
to unified and unifying purpose that cannot be bottled in old paradigm.
The use of thought to block its own purpose is an un-whole-y or conflicted and segregating
purpose. If you would open to your true Nature - you cannot preset terms - but of course
you can identify and own your feelings, fears, desires or thought as part of yielding them
to an honesty of being.
The mind of judgement forbids this - for you believe your own 'convictions'. Be glad you
are wrong about yourself and release invalidating guilt by accepting awakened
responsibility as your 'Now'. There is always another way of seeing than what fear and
guilt dictate - but the mind that was made to obscure cannot be the guide for revelation.

2017-01-02
Brian Steere