DOES A CHRISTIAN WIFE HAVE TO SUBMIT TO A

SINFUL REQUEST FROM HER HUSBAND?

BY:

REY RYAN B. APOR

GYPSY JENNSEN ARQUIO
ROBEE CAMILLE DESABALLE
MANUEL ADOLFO LAZA
JIMROHK MONTECILLO
DANTE E. REBOSA
JERIC SALOMON
RAMON R. VILLANUEVA JR.
ERMIE LYN GERONA

A thesis submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirements

Of Christian Ethics in the College of Law

COR JESU COLLEGE OF DIGOS CITY

 EXECUTIVE SUMMARY

Morality speaks of a system of behavior in regards to standards of right or wrong

behavior. The word carries the concepts of: (1) moral standards, with regard to behavior; (2)

moral responsibility, referring to our conscience; and (3) a moral identity, or one who is capable

of right or wrong action. Common synonyms include ethics, principles, virtue, and goodness.

Morality has become a complicated issue in the multi-cultural world we live in today. Let's

explore what morality is, how it affects our behavior, our conscience, our society, and our

ultimate destiny.

Morality describes the principles that govern our behavior. Without these principles in

place, societies cannot survive for long. In today's world, morality is frequently thought of as

belonging to a particular religious point of view, but by definition, we see that this is not the

case. Everyone adheres to a moral doctrine of some kind.

Morality as it relates to our behavior is important on three levels. Renowned thinker, scholar and

author C.S. Lewis defines them as: (1) to ensure fair play and harmony between individuals; (2)

to help make us good people in order to have a good society; and (3) to keep us in a good

relationship with the power that created us. Based on this definition, it's clear that our beliefs are

critical to our moral behavior.

Morality impacts our everyday decisions, and those choices are directed by our

conscience. Again, we must decide for ourselves where the conscience originates. Many people

hold to the idea that the conscience is a matter of our hearts, that concepts of right, wrong, and

fairness are "programmed" in each of us. This is in keeping with the writings of Paul the Apostle,
who points out that even those who do not believe in God frequently obey God's laws as given in

the Ten Commandments: "for when Gentiles, who do not have the law, by nature do the things in

the law, these, although not having the law, are a law to themselves, who show the work of the

law written in their hearts, their conscience also bearing witness, and between themselves their

thoughts accusing or else excusing them" (Romans 2:14-15, NKJV). Again, those who do not

believe in God are left with the only possible conclusion they can come to - that our decisions are

based solely on our need to survive. What we call our conscience, then, would be based on

learned behavior, rather than part of a Divine design.

In this passage, God says that the godly wife should be subject to her own

husbandaccording to Gods Will. I emphasize the expression according to Gods Will, because

thats where people usually make the fatal error when they try to interpret this passage according

to their imaginations, not paying attention to what this passage really says. I think the reason why

many women believe the false interpretation of this passage is because they are disobedient in

their hearts or they are afraid to obey Gods Will against their husbands will, therefore they look

for a biblical justification for their disobedience to Gods Will Actually, if you read this

passage carefully, you will understand that it can be summarized in the following way: Wives,

be subject to your husbands and, even if they are unbelievers, then win them to Christ by living a

decent and a godly life. Indeed, the Apostle didnt just tell the wives to be subject to their

husbands, but he also detailed howthey should do that: by having a pure pattern of life

(conversation = pattern of life) led by the fear of God; by a decent outward appearance that

expresses a stress on the inward purity of heart; by a meek and quiet spirit.

This practically means that if the ungodly husband asks his godly wife to disobey the

Will of God, she will not do that, because in that case she will not be subject to him according to
Gods Will, and thus her behavior will not be a holy behavior that could win her husband to

Christ, but on the contrary it encourages him to ungodliness. If her ungodly husband asks her to

be immodest, the godly wife will not do that; if he asks her not to have the fear of God and not to

obey Him by faith, she wont do that. Brief: if you are a godly woman, and if your husband asks

you to do things according to his will, and if those things are sinful and contrary to the sound

teaching, and if you do them, then you are not being submissive to your husband, because your

submission to him should be according to Gods Will and for the good of your husband, and not

according to your husbands corrupted will. I will even dare to say more: even if your husband is

a godly man, and he commands you to do something against Gods Will, then you should not do

it, as in that particular point your husband is acting in a fleshly way, and the Bible teaches you

the following: Cease, my son, to hear the instruction that causeth to err from the words of

knowledge. (Proverbs 19:27) So if an instruction causes you to do something against Gods

Will, then you should not listen to it. In the beginning God created the woman to be a helper for

man; do you help your husband if you encourage him in sin? So if you want to be submissive to

your husband according to Gods Will, then you should do the useful things that will be helpful

for your husband, even if those things are contrary to your husbands will. After all, you are to be

in submission to Christ in the person of your husband, and not to your husband against Christ.

This is indeed what Abigail did, as we will see later. But note it well: in all these things, the

godly wife should be mature enough to be able to obey God against the will of her husband, and

yet by avoiding any quarrel with her husband. Note that the Apostle says that the godly wife

should be of a meek and quiet spirit. But if the ungodly husband wants to make quarrels, then

thats not the guilt of the godly wife; the godly woman should not blame herself for the anger of

her husband when she does the right thing; even when he is angry and quarrelsome, she should
continue in her meekness with all patience. Prayerfully and with a meek and quiet and

submissive spirit, you can win your husband to obey Gods Word, even if that obedience will be

a legalistic obedience.

Submission is an important issue in relation to marriage. Here is the plain biblical

command: Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the

husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the

Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in

everything (Ephesians 5:2224).

Gods Word teaches us two important principles as it relates to the submission of wives to

their husbands. God tells wives to submit to their husbands in everything (Ephesians 5:24) but

the Apostles when told to disobey God said that We ought to obey God rather than men (Acts

5:29). So when we take the whole counsel of God on the matter of submission we see that wives

are to obey their husbands in all things unless their husband directly tells them to do something

that would violate Gods law.

Each case has its wise way to be solved, and all should be done by the leading of Gods

Spirit. But it is really dishonoring for God if a Christian woman should fear from the threats of

her ungodly husband and if she should feel obliged to disobey the Lord! Remember the

following wisdom from Gods Word: And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he

consents to dwell with her, let her not leave [her] husband. For the unbelieving husband is

sanctified in the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified in the brother; since [otherwise]

indeed your children are unclean, but now they are holy. But if the unbeliever go away, let

them go away; a brother or a sister is not bound in such [cases], but God has called us in
peace. For what knowest thou, O wife, if thou shalt save thy husband? or what knowest thou, O

husband, if thou shalt save thy wife? (1 Corinthians 7:13-16) Examine well the passage that I

emphasized: although a truly Christian woman will not accept divorce, and yet she should not

lose her Peace and feel bound or guilty if her husband chooses to separate. If doing the right

thing will cost you this, then let it be! Doing the right thing may even cost you your life! Is not

Christ worthy of your life and of all this? If you compromise and you do not do the right thing,

you will lose your spiritual immunity and you will lose your joy and your eternity! You will

prove to be a believer for a while (cf. Luke 8:13) Are you not ready to cut and throw from you

all what is dear to you for Christs sake (cf. Mark 9:43-48) so that you may not go to Hell?

Remember that the Lord said: If any man come to me, and shall not hate his own father and

mother, and wife, and children, and brothers, and sisters, yea, and his own life too, he cannot be

my disciple (Luke 14:26). And He said: Do not think that I have come to send peace upon the

earth: I have not come to send peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man at variance with

his father, and the daughter with her mother, and the daughter-in-law with her mother-in-law; and

they of his household [shall be] a mans enemies. He who loves father or mother above me is not

worthy of me; and he who loves son or daughter above me is not worthy of me. And he who does

not take up his cross and follow after me is not worthy of me. (Matthew 10:34-38) All this is

very serious, for if you refuse to bear the cross and to be separated from evil, then you are not a

true disciple of Jesus Christ, and if you are not His disciple then you are lost.
 INTRODUCTION

During marriage ceremony, an essential part therein is when the man and the woman

make vow with each other. A vow that one should love and accept the other, through thick or

thin, in sickness and in health, for abundance or in wanting. The vow made by each would bind

both into unity. A bond that is respected not only by selected few people or organizations, but by

the whole community in both religious and political aspects.

Marriage, in its legalistic view, is a special union entered into by a man and a woman

for the establishment of a family. A basic social institution, basic form of government, and a

basic unit of society, among others are some definitions of a family wherein a husband and wife

with their children forming part of it. Mutual support and respect of each spouse towards the

other is portrayed in this view.

In the religious point of view, marriage is obedience to Gods command. Within the

marriage, the wife is owned by the husband and the husband is owned by the wife; a fulfillment

of Gods design for humanity. A grand design that a community of believers sprouts from the

freshly created community, formed by the husband and his wife and by their children, and by

their descendants. The Church is even likened to a wife having Christ as her husband. The

Church should submit to Christ as the wife submits to her husband. A bit different to that of the

political or legalistic view, marriage in religious view is more of ownership and submission.

Marriage is celebrated in different ways, depending on the cultures, and places among

others with one common purpose UNITY. If a man and a woman entered into matrimonial

unity, the two become one. The unity is bounded by the vow of commitment and complemented
with mutual support wherein one is as owned by the other and vice versa. Deviation from such

unity and backing out from the vows made would tantamount to unfaithfulness of the deviating

spouse.

What if the vow given by the spouses is tested by some circumstances circumstances

which negatively affect the principles long-held by either the husband or the wife? What would

one do if induced by the other to commit acts against ones beliefs and principles? What if a

husband requests something from his wife, something as would, somehow, affects the wifes

Christian principles? Would she loosen her tight grip of her principles for the sake of her

matrimonial vow with her husband? What would a wife do if her husband requests her to sin

with him?

This case study focuses on trying to answer the questions raised in the preceding

paragraph. The issue concerning the possible reaction of a wife if she be requested by her

husband to commit sins with him would be tackled in the course of this study. Furthermore, the

participants of this study will try to unveil some points that might affect the said concerns and

issues which are also going to be weighed with the aforementioned definitions of marriage.
 DISCUSSION

Does a Christian wife have to submit to a sinful request from her husband?

Should a Christian wife have to participate in a threesome or abort her child because her

husband tells her to? Some Christians teach that women should submit to any and all requests

their husbands make even if they believe that in doing so they would be directly sinning against

God. Other Christians believe that if a husband is not living a righteous and holy life he has no

authority over his wife at all regardless of whatever requests he asks of her.

Submission is an important issue in relation to marriage. Here is the plain biblical

command: Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the

husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the

Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in

everything (Ephesians 5:2224).

Even before sin entered the world, there was still the principle of the headship of the

husband (1 Timothy 2:13). Adam was created first, and Eve was created to be a "helper" for

Adam (Genesis 2:1820). God has established several types of authority in the world:

governments to enforce justice in society and provide protection; religious leaders to lead and

feed the sheep of God; husbands to love and nurture their wives; and fathers to admonish their

children. In each case, submission is required: citizen to government, flock to shepherd, wife to

husband, child to father.

 The Greek word translated submit, hupotasso, is the continuing form of the verb. This

means that submitting to God, the government, a religious leader, or a husband is not a one-time

act. It is a continual attitude, which becomes a pattern of behavior.

First, of course, we are responsible to submit to God, which is the only way we can truly

obey Him (James 1:21; 4:7). And each Christian should live in humble, ready submission to

others (Ephesians 5:21). In regards to submission within the family unit, 1 Corinthians 11:23,

says that the husband is to submit to Christ (as Christ did to God the Father) and the wife is to

submit to her husband.

There is much misunderstanding in our world today about the roles of husband and wife

within a marriage. Even when the biblical roles are properly understood, many choose to reject

them in favor of a supposed emancipation of women, with the result that the family unit is torn

apart. Its no surprise that the world rejects Gods design, but Gods people should be joyfully

celebrating that design.

Submit is not a bad word. Submission is not a reflection of inferiority or lesser worth.

Christ constantly submitted Himself to the will of the Father (Luke 22:42; John 5:30), without

giving up an iota of His worth.

To counter the worlds misinformation concerning a wifes submission to her husband,

we should carefully note the following in Ephesians 5:2224: 1) A wife is to submit to one man

(her husband), not to every man. The rule to submit does not extend to a womans place in

society at large. 2) A wife is to willingly submit to her husband in personal obedience to the Lord

Jesus. She submits to her husband because she loves Jesus. 3) The example of a wifes

submission is that of the church to Christ. 4) There is nothing said of the wifes abilities, talents,
or worth; the fact that she submits to her own husband does not imply that she is inferior or less

worthy in any way. Also notice that there are no qualifiers to the command to submit, except in

everything. So, the husband does not have to pass an aptitude test or an intelligence test before

his wife submits. It may be a fact that she is better qualified than he to lead in many ways, but

she chooses to follow the Lords instruction by submitting to her husbands leadership. In so

doing, a godly wife can even win her unbelieving husband to the Lord without words simply

by her holy behavior (1 Peter 3:1).

Submission should be a natural response to loving leadership. When a husband loves his

wife as Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:2533), then submission is a natural response from

a wife to her husband. But, regardless of the husbands love or lack thereof, the wife is

commanded to submit as to the Lord (verse 22). This means that her obedience to Godher

acceptance of His planwill result in her submission to her husband. The as to the Lord

comparison also reminds the wife that there is a higher authority to whom she is responsible.

Thus, she is under no obligation to disobey civil law or Gods law in the name of submission

to her husband. She submits in things that are right and lawful and God-honoring. Of course, she

does not submit to abusethat is not right or lawful or God-honoring. To try to use the

principle of submission to justify abuse is to twist Scripture and promote evil.

The submission of the wife to the husband in Ephesians 5 does not allow the husband to

be selfish or domineering. His command is to love (verse 25), and he is responsible before God

to fulfill that command. The husband must exercise his authority wisely, graciously, and in the

fear of the God to whom he must give an account.

 When a wife is loved by her husband as the church is loved by Christ, submission is not

difficult. Ephesians 5:24 says, Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit

to their husbands in everything. In a marriage, submission is a position of giving honor and

respect to the husband (see Ephesians 5:33) and completing what he is lacking in. It is Gods

wise plan for how the family should function.

Matthew Henry wrote, The woman was made out of Adams side. She was not made out

of his head to rule over him, nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to

be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be loved. The immediate

context of the commands to the husband and wife in Ephesians 5:1933 involves the filling of

the Spirit. Spirit-filled believers are to be worshipful (5:19), thankful (5:20), and submissive

(5:21). Paul then follows this line of thought on Spirit-filled living and applies it to wives in

verses 2224. A wife should submit to her husband, not because women are inferior (the Bible

never teaches that), but because that is how God designed the marital relationship to function.

Submission is not agreeing on everything.

Submission is not agreeing on everything, for instance the Christian faith, because the

husband in 1 Peter 3:16 is an unbeliever. If in that situation the husband said, You cant have

that religion. In this family we worship ISIS (or whatever), this wife says, Im sorry. Its

possible to be submissive and refuse to think what your husband says you should think. This text

doesnt make sense without that. She has sworn allegiance to Jesus. Jesus is now her Lord and

her King. Shes an alien and an exile in this marriage. This husband belongs to another god, and

shes called to live with him.

 If he says, I dont want you to be a Christian, what does she say? She says, I love you.

I want to be submissive to you. I intend to be submissive to you. But on this point, I have no

choice. I belong to Jesus. He may send her away. That happens in 1 Corinthians 7. The

unbeliever splits, which would be a great tragedy.

Submission does not mean you must agree with the opinions of your husbands, even on

things as fundamental and serious as the Christian faith. God has made you with a mind. You

have to think. You are a person, not a body and not a machine. Youre a thinking being who is

able to process whether the gospel is true. And if its true, you believe it. If he says, You cant

believe that, you humbly and submissively do not submit to that.

Submission does not mean leaving your brain at the altar.

Any man who says, I do the thinking in this family, is sick and has a sick view of his

authority. I dealt with a couple one time. The wife said he demanded that she get permission to

go to the bathroom. That really happened. I just looked at him and said, Youre not well. You

have an unbelievably distorted view of this fellow heir of the grace of life. You dont understand

the Bible. Youre taking a word like authority or leadership or submission, and then youre

stepping away from the Bible and filling those words up with stuff you want to do. Youre not

getting this from the Bible.

Submission never leaves the brain at the altar. All throughout the marriage, a husband is

reckoning with an independent mental center that has thoughts that are worth listening to. Its the

working out of a one-flesh union. Leadership does not mean you do not listen. Leadership

doesnt even mean always getting the last word. Good leadership often says, You were right; I

was wrong.
 Leadership is taking initiative. Sometimes I say, Who says, Lets . . . , more often in

your relationship?

Lets go out to eat.

Lets try to get our finances in order.

Lets get to church on time next Sunday.

Who says it most often? If its the wife, you have a problem, and the problem is with the

guy. If its the guy, shes probably happy because she doesnt want to be the one to say lets

over and over again. Wives dont want to say lets most often. In general I know Im

generalizing leadership means a bent toward initiative under which women thrive. Not

dictation, never listening. Not even having the last word.

Submission does not mean you do not try to influence your husband.

Submission does not mean avoiding the effort to influence or change the husband. The

whole point of the text is, Win him. Her life is devoted to changing this husband from an

unbeliever to a believer. Can you imagine if somebody said submission means, Stop trying to

change your husband? Well, I get what they might be saying. But if your husband is living in

sin or your wife is living in sin or unbelief, you want them to change, and you wouldnt be a

loving person if you didnt if you stopped wanting that. That may sound insubordinate to

some. Its not, biblically.

Submission is not putting the will of the husband before the will of Christ.

Submission is not putting the will of the husband before the will of Christ. Christ is her

Lord now, and for the Lords sake, she will submit to the husband, but he is not her Lord.

Therefore, wherever she must choose between the two, she chooses Jesus. If her husband says,

Lets get involved in a scam, or Lets have group sex, her choice is clear. I go with Jesus on

this. She would say it not with a haughty or arrogant attitude, but rather with a winsome,

submissive, longing one. He will be able to discern in her a longing that he not do that so that she

could enjoy him as her leader. Do you feel that? I will not follow your lead on this, and I am not

following you with a demeanor that tells you I want to follow your leadership but cannot in this

moment, in this way.

Submission does not mean getting all of her spiritual strength through her husband.

Submission does not mean getting all of her spiritual strength through her husband. Hes

not giving her any spiritual strength in this text and shes got lots of it. Her hope is in God. Shes

probably going to church on Sunday morning before he gets up, getting her strength elsewhere,

getting her worldview elsewhere.

Submission does not mean living or acting in fear.

This God-fearing wife is fearless.

We believe that men are called to a unique kind of leadership in marriage. We believe that

women are called to a unique kind of submission in marriage. And we think its a beautiful thing

the way those two roles complement and serve one another. If we probe the depths and keep
digging into the Scriptures, even though theyre written in another time, they will shape a

marriage today into a beautiful thing.

Therefore, we would define submission in marriage like this: Submission is the defined

calling of a wife to honor and affirm her husbands leadership, and so help to carry it through

according to her gifts.

When it comes to the submission of wives to unrighteous husbands there are extremes on

both the left and the right side of this issue.

On the left we have Christians who believe women only have to submit to husbands that

are righteous and treat them right (as they see right).

Authority is given from God, if we do not follow God we lose the power that comes with

that authority. Therefore, his authority becomes useless. Would a sinful man have her well-being

in mind? I would think not. I agree a man is the leader of the home, but I also believe a woman is

only obligated to submit to her husbands righteous desires the same as a man should only please

a woman when her desires are righteous.

It is never stated that a wife has to stay with her husband if he sexually denies her. I have

shown from the Bible that a Christian wife may leave her husband for these 4 reasons:

If he fails to provide her with food and clothing (shelter is implied with clothing).

If he refuses to have regular sexual relations with her (sexual defraudment).

If he physically abuses her or makes attempts on her life.

If he abandons her.
However this woman is not looking for serious reasons she may leave her husband. She is

looking for reasons that she does not have to submit to him. These grave sins described are not

reasons for a wife to stop submitting to her husbands authority they are reasons to end the

marriage so he is no longer her husband. If the woman chooses to stay even if he is chronically

sexually denying her, physically abusing her or refusing to work then she must continue to

submit to him. As long as he is her husband she must submit to him.

So if a woman were to tell us I am not leving my husband for refusing to work and

playing Xbox 7 days a week while he sends me out to work. But I wont submit to him either.

it is rightful to tell that woman she is wrong. She has two choices submit to her husband or end

the marriage so he is no longer her husband. Those are her only two choices.

A wife does not submit to her husband because he is treating her as a Christian husband

should or because he has her well-being in mind. She submits to her husband because God

has commanded it. A husband, Christian or non-Christian, does not lose his authority over his

wife if he does not follow Gods Word.

This woman and a whole host of Christians today ignore this passage from Peter on the

subject of submission of wives to unrighteous husbands: In the same way, you wives, be

submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they

may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, 2 as they observe your chaste and

respectful behavior.
 This passage makes it crystal clear wives are to submit to sinful and disobedient

husbands. Whether your husband is a Christian, a non-Christian or a professed Christian who is

living in disobedience if you are his Christian wife you are to submit to him despite his sinful

behavior.

This attitude toward submission is by far the biggest problem today with Christians

attitudes toward marriage. But there is another extreme the far right extreme. And while this

far right extreme may be a small minority and some think it is not worthy of our time even to

address their false teaching as Christians we must also stand for the truth and stand against

false teaching.

It does not matter if many people are teaching a false doctrine or just small groups are

teaching it false teaching is false teaching and it must be exposed. Youre falling prey to the

same trap that women do. Its an obvious diversion! You dont answer the question to an obvious

diversion or if you do then you have to tie it back to righteous attitude and actions.

Good answers to a question like But what if my husband commands me to sin? are:

lf that ever happens, feel free to call me at any time and well look through the

Scriptures to discuss it. Now, as I was saying about submission

Whens the last time you heard a husband command his wife, much less to sin? Now, as

I was saying about submission

You should find where it says it is a sin in the Scripture. Then you come to him with a

respectful and submissive attitude and say: Hey, I think this may be against what God says in
the Scripture here and my conscience. Is there anything else I can do instead to make it up to

you? Now, as I was saying about submission

Truths is one of the strongest temptations that women have which is the desire to be

rebellious. Submission is righteous and holy. Discussing it is good, and diversions away from it

are to play right into temptation. We do not portray like it is so rare and unfathomable that a

husband would ask his wife to sin. Does he forget how many Christian women are married to

unbelieving husbands? Husbands that might ask their wives to do drugs? Husbands that might as

their wives to have sex with their friends or participate in a threesome? Yes these things happen.

And yes even professing Christian husbands may ask their wives to do sinful things. Just

because it is rare does not mean it does not happen.I really dont see the fear these men have of

discussing exceptions to submission. Since when is the truth a distraction or temptation? It

is actually very easy to address these exemptions and then continue on in the topic of

submission. We dont ever have to be afraid of the truth as Christians.

We are to teach the whole counsel of God. We are not to go to the left or the right: Turn

not to the right hand nor to the left: remove thy foot from evil. People on the left and right

extremes of submission both have something in common. They both dismiss those passages they

dont like and they both add things to the text that are not there. But we are not to take away

from Gods Word or to add to it but instead we are to follow the entire Word of God: Ye shall

not add unto the word which I command you, neither shall ye diminish ought from it, that ye

may keep the commandments of the Lord your God which I command you.
Deuteronomy 4:2, So truth about the submission of wives to their husbands is very simple. A

wife is to submit to her husband in all areas of her life and everything he wishes her to do or not

do as long as he does not ask her to sin against God. Even if he asks her to sin against God she

should respectfully refuse his request but this does not mean she stops submitting in every other

way. Even if her husband is living a sinful life either as a Christian or non-Christian she must

submit to him. She is not responsible for his sin, she is only responsible for hers. But this then

brings us to the final part of submission to sinful requests by husbands to their wives. Is a wife

responsible for doing something sinful if her husband commands her to do it? Submission does

not mean that the men in authority, whether in the church or in the home, are always right. They

arent. Theyre sometimes and often wrong. They sin, as do we. Submission does not mean blind

obedience. It does not mean that we sin in order to submit. It doesnt mean that you overlook sin

in the authority.

Now, what if he asks her to participate in a threesome, abort her baby, or help him

commit robbery by stealing from a bank? Should she submit in these instances? NO! A

reminder about headship and covering: The one that is covered bears no iniquity. It is the

authority that bears the iniquity. Moose first presents a false dichotomy If a Christian teacher

teaches that there are any exceptions to Gods command that wives are to submit to their

husbands then the person is said to be negating the entire Biblical teaching of the submission of

wives to their husbands. So according to Moose a Christian wife should participate in a

threesome, abort her baby, help her husband commit a robbery and do anything else her husband

requests of her even if she believes that action would be a sin against God. If she does God will

not hold her accountable in fact he honors her for participating in acts she believes are sinful if

her husband asks her to do it. This teaching by Moose Norseman is not just simply absurd it is
the very definition of heresy. Any teaching that tells someone it is ok to sin against God is

heresy. As believers we will often disagree on Bible interpretations and what is and what is not

sin. But to acknowledge that something is a sinful activity and then say God is ok with us doing

that sinful activity under certain circumstances is the height of heresy.

The Apostle Peter made this point abundantly clear: Then Peter and the other apostles

answered and said, We ought to obey God rather than men.

Acts 5:29 (KJV) Moose bases his heresy on a passage from the book of Numbers which

is linked from the phrase the authority that bears the iniquity. Every vow, and every binding

oath to afflict the soul, her husband may establish it, or her husband may make it void. But if her

husband altogether hold his peace at her from day to day; then he establisheth all her vows, or all

her bonds, which are upon her: he confirmeth them, because he held his peace at her in the day

that he heard them. But if he shall any ways make them void after that he hath heard them; then

he shall bear her iniquity. These are the statutes, which the Lord commanded Moses, between a

man and his wife, between the father and his daughter, being yet in her youth in her fathers

house.

Numbers 30:13-16; The key verse Moose is pointing to is verse 15 of Numbers chapter 30: But

if he shall any ways make them void after that he hath heard them; then he shall bear her

iniquity. This is a great passage of Scripture that I have spoken about several times on my blog.

I do not disagree that this passage demonstrates the headship of man over the women in his

family whether it be his wife or his daughters. But what it does NOT show is that a husband can

ask his wife to directly participate in an activity that she believes is a violation of Gods law and

that God would honor her for obeying his sinful command and participating in these kinds of sin.
In this case with her broken vow the husband by not overriding the vow his wife has made when

she made it has taken on the penalty for her not fulfilling that vow if he stops her from doing it.

If he tells her he has changed his mind and does not want her to fulfill the vow she made then he

bears what would have been her sin. It is his sin now since he approved her vow.

A simpler way to say this is when a woman makes a vow to do something in her

husbands presence and he either remains silent or actively agrees with her vow then as her

husband he takes on the responsibility and the penalty if he stops her from fulfilling that vow.
 Conclusion

Gods Word teaches us two important principles as it relates to the submission of wives to

their husbands. God tells wives to submit to their husbands in everything (Ephesians 5:24) but

the Apostles when told to disobey God said that We ought to obey God rather than men (Acts

5:29). So when we take the whole counsel of God on the matter of submission we see that wives

are to obey their husbands in all things unless their husband directly tells them to do something

that would violate Gods law.

It really is that simple. Christians on the left of Biblical submission want to find every

way they can out of submission so they abuse the principle that We ought to obey God rather

than men by saying things like if your husband chooses a church you disagree with you dont

have to follow him there which is utterly false. But then on the far right of Biblical submission

we have those like Moose who claim that there are no exceptions for wives submitting to their

husbands and even if their husband asks them to participate in a threesome or kill their child they

must do these things.

The people of God must avoid all extremes. We must instead walk the straight path

following the whole counsel of God and not veer either to the left or the right.

1) MUST A WIFE SUBMIT TO AN ABUSIVE HUSBAND? Peters words, even if any of

them are disobedient to the word show that he wasnt just thinking about nice husbands. So we

must conclude that a wife may need to submit to some abuse. The difficult question is, How

much? My view is that a wife must submit to verbal and emotional abuse, but if the husband
begins to harm her physically, she needs to call civil or church authorities. There are civil laws

against battery and it is proper for an abused wife to call in authorities to confront and deal with

a husband who violates the law. Although physical abuse is not a biblical basis for divorce, I

would counsel separation in some cases to protect the wife while the husband gets his temper

under control. But even in such situations, a Christian wife must not provoke her husband to

anger and she must display a gentle spirit.

I take the words, without being frightened by any fear to mean that a woman should not

fear her husbands intimidation more than she fears God (see 3:2, with fear [of God]; 3:14 15).

If he tries to scare her into giving up her faith, she must not go along with him.

2.) MUST A WIFE SUBMIT TO A HUSBAND WHO ASKS HER TO DO SOMETHING

WRONG?

Some say that because Sarah went along with Abrahams sinful schemes to pawn her off

as his sister (Gen. 12:10 20; 20:1 18), that wives should obey their husbands even when theyre

told to do something sinful. But that would be a violation of the higher principle that we must

obey God rather than men (Acts 5:29). Peters words, do what is right (3:6), show that he is not

counseling sinful behavior in the name of submission to a disobedient husband. But, again, if you

as a wife must disobey your husband in order to obey God, you can do it in a submissive spirit,

letting him know that you love him and want to please him, but it is more important that you

obey God.
3) CAN A WIFE BE SUBMISSIVE AND YET CONFRONT HER HUSBANDS SIN?

In other words, is there a proper place for tough love? I think the answer is Yes, but be

careful! Love seeks the highest good of the one loved, and sometimes that means confronting

sin. But sometimes love covers a multitude of sins (1 Pet. 4:8), so love doesnt mean jumping on

your husbands every sin as if you were the Holy Spirit. If you must confront, you should do it in

as appealing a way as possible, so that your husband can see that you really care for him. You

may say, Honey, I love you and I value our relationship. But when you drink, it hurts both you

and our relationship. You need to get help. Im not going to cover for your behavior the next time

youre drunk.

In a passage where a woman in a church came to somebody, accompanied by two elders

wives. They proceeded to share how unbearable her home life was. Her husband, who had made

a profession of faith in Christ after I had shared the gospel with him, was an alcoholic. He was

also devoted to his job more than to his family. He was not meeting his wifes emotional needs.

They all had read James Dobsons Love Must Be Tough and agreed that she needed to create an

ultimatum by leaving her husband if he didnt stop drinking and begin acting toward his family

as he should.

The concept of 1 Peter 3 and of Hebrews 12, that God sometimes puts us in difficult

situations to refine our faith, but that we must obey His Word to reap the benefits. The Lord

began showing her many ways that she was being selfish and manipulative. She began to seek to

please her husband and submit to him. Eventually, he quit drinking and began spending more

time with his family. That woman proved what Peter is saying here, that a Christian wifes

behavior should be so beautiful that it attracts her difficult, disobedient husband to her Savior.
That should be your overall goal in all your dealings with your husband. Next week Ill hit the

husbands, but today I ask each wife, even if your husband is a believer, to take a look at your

behavior in this spiritual mirror and ask, Is it attractive? Does it make my husband want to

follow my Lord Jesus Christ?

 REFERENCES

Principles for Marriage 1 Corinthians 7:13-16 (Bible Old Testament)

The Cost of Discipleship Luke 14:26 (Bible Old Testament)

Jesus Sends Out the Twelve Matthew 10:34-38 (Bible Old Testament)

AllAboutGOD.com. Morality. Retrieved from http://www.allaboutphilosophy.org/

Diciple of Jesus Christ. July 25, 2010. The submission of the wise woman to her

ungodly husband. Retrieved from https://jdisciple.wordpress.com

David J. Stewart. A Christian Wife is to Obey Her Husband in EVERY THING. Retrieved from

http://www.jesus-is-savior.com

Myths about the submission of the wife to her husband. Retrieved from http://www.bible.ca
APPENDIX A: CHARTS AND DATA FROM CHARACTERISITICS OF MARRIED

WOMEN ON THE SINFUL REQUEST OF THEIR HUSBANDS

Our group has conducted a research on should a Christian wife have to submit to a

sinful request from her husband. Please take a moment on what you think on the

following questions we presented. Put a check on your preferred answer. Your

response will be kept strictly confidential. What you have to say is important to us.

Your Opinion Counts!

YES NO

Is it always the right thing for a wife to submit to her

husband?

Should a woman with a husband who is abusive to her

or her children not stand in opposition to his

behavior?

Should she submit to her husband if it means

participating in his ungodly behavior?

COMMENTS:

BIBLIOGRAPHY
AllAboutGOD.com. Morality. Retrieved from http://www.allaboutphilosophy.org/

David J. Stewart. A Christian Wife is to Obey Her Husband in EVERY THING. Retrieved from

http://www.jesus-is-savior.com

Diciple of Jesus Christ. July 25, 2010. The submission of the wise woman to her

ungodly husband. Retrieved from https://jdisciple.wordpress.com

Jesus Sends Out the Twelve Matthew 10:34-38 (Bible Old Testament)

Myths about the submission of the wife to her husband. Retrieved from http://www.bible.ca

Principles for Marriage 1 Corinthians 7:13-16 (Bible Old Testament)

The Cost of Discipleship Luke 14:26 (Bible Old Testament)