What Is The Single Insight That Most Changed Your Life? - Quora PDF

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Insights Major Events in Life Impact Success Life Lessons +3 Related Questions
What is the single insight that most changed your What is the most life changing question you have
life? heard?
Could be something that someone said to you, something you read in a book, a line from What single individual inuenced your life the most?
a movie or maybe just an insight you had while reecting.
What single insight most changed your life Jay
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Which single work of ction has changed your life the

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What book has had the single most impact on your
Ali
Almusawi, Storytelling at scale life?
Updated Jul 2, 2016
What is your single most enlightening moment of your
That Vulnerability Weakness. life?
What question most changed your perception of life

I learnt this when I rst came across Dr. Bren Browns TED talk on listening to
and how you think of yourself?
[1]
shame. I was 17 at the time and was getting ready to start my rst semester at
college. Looking back, I think timing certainly played a big role in my appreciation of More Related Questions
the message that Dr. Brene was trying to convey both in the video itself and two of her
other major works (Daring Greatly & The Gifts of Imperfection ). Question Stats
Perhaps like most people my age, I was terribly and mistakenly convinced of the 2,039 Followers
following: 1,864,602 Views
Last Asked 8h ago
1. That vulnerability and weakness were synonymous terms, and at best,
1 Merged Question
vulnerability was more or less a cover-up term that people used whenever
they were trying to mask or sugar-coat what was in fact weakness. Edits
2. To be vulnerable is to expose your darkest, most emotionally-draining

problems and insecurities to others. Hence the question really becomes: why
would you selshly put people through all that complex stu only for you to
come out of it feeling better and lighter, and them much worse? And this was
the moral dilemma that I wrestled with most.
To speak to the rst point, the TED talk made me realize that vulnerability and
weakness are in some sense eectively opposites. Even more so, Dr. Brene argues that
in thinking about our attitude towards our own imperfections, to feel weak is to
constantly fall prey to a at, abstract, [massive] shame-induced plaster while to be
vulnerable is to introspect, recognize, and celebrate an extremely elusive asset. Unlike
Weakness, which fervently tempts us to hide bits and pieces of ourselves from others
and tirelessly ruminate over our shortcomings, Vulnerability is much more proactive
and adaptive (from an evolutionary standpoint) in that it is an invitation to build
deep trust with other people. Simply, it is the very humble recognition that we are
also imperfect human beings and that there is little to gain [and a lot to lose] out of an
emotionally-secure facade.
Regarding the second point, which is critical to maintaining healthy relationships, I

eventually realized that a vulnerable conversation doesnt have to be a dense and
dramatic one. Instead, the conversation simply needs to lean towards mindful
transparency and being authentic. This point is particularly important as some might
posit that, for instance, there is no place for vulnerability in most cut-throat corporate
workplaces - that the culture itself is anti-weakness and hence anti-vulnerable.
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Further, to choose to be vulnerable is to risk a job or to be passed for a promotion,
which from a cost-benet standpoint is ultimately unattractive. While theres
invariably a need to recognize when best to voice an opinion or thought, and one may
even argue that it is a skill that has to do with emotional intelligence, vulnerability
requires that we do not normalize or become afraid of such situations but rather view
them as by-products of our industrial and corporate evolution, and to view
vulnerability itself as a key ingredient in our self-actualization and sustenance as
human beings.
Footnotes
[1] The Power of Vulnerability | Brene Brown | TED Talks
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Upvote 40 Downvote Comments 3+
Dandan
Zhu, NYC Entrepreneur, Headhunter turned career coach,
Founder & CEO, Dandan Global
Updated Tue
In 6 years, I went from completely at a loss of what to do for my future after

graduating college without a job, to owning 4 investment properties by 28, and
starting my own business after a successful career as a top headhunter. The most
game-changing insight that helped me achieve the life I wanted is a concept
from Stephen Coveys book, 7 Habits of Highly Eective People.
These words changed my life, my worldview, and how I behave to this day:
Dependence is the paradigm of you - you take care of me; you come through for
me; you didnt come through; I blame you for the results.
Independence is the paradigm of I - I can do it; I am responsible; I am self-reliant;

I can choose
As I explain in this article, when I was younger, I blamed my familys lack of support
for my failure to become a famous Asian pop star (which was my dream since middle
school, and still kinda is haha!). That sounds stupid because it is. People have
succeeded against greater odds than me, yet instead of accepting my inability to
drum up the condence to go after my dreams, I chose to view others actions as the
problem, when really, I should be minding my own business on what I DO to create
my success.
Once I read this line in Coveys book, I felt like a lightning bolt hit me. This was my
Eureka! moment. I realized:
1. I was immature to blame others instead of actually doing something

about it. Its easier to place the negative feelings on others, when in reality,
you are only dodging your own reection in the mirror, fearful of facing your
feelings of inadequacy, embarrassment, and perceived failure*.
*If you learned something from times when things may not have gone how
you planned or hoped, did you really fail?
2. My life is my responsibility. Past being an infant, child, then young adult,

we are all going to eventually grow up. It is no longer the fault of: our siblings,
parents, friends, acquaintances, bosses, society, teachers, spouses,
professors, for how we turned out. Besides - We are always turning out
dierently as each year progresses. There is no static version of who we are
because we are always changing. Therefore we can turn out great at any
age. In fact, as long as you think youre great, youre great. Whos to say your
version is wrong?
3. Being negative was exhausting! Its much easier having an optimistic

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worldview, where one can be Independent, thus free to choose: the life we
want to live, our job we want to do, the physical shape we want to achieve, the
accomplishments we want in our lives, literally anything! All the hate,
misery, anger, and self-victimization, not only drained me and made me
spiral downwards, I literally got nothing out of it except more bad stu!
Negative thinking just isnt impactful or eective in any way, so its not worth
engaging in.
Negative Return on Investment (ROI) = Not a good strategy/mindset = Stop being

negative, because its all in your head and its subconsciously impacting your
outcome!
In summary, this single insight made me: much happier, feeling in control,
condent, and hopeful for the future. I highly recommend the whole book, there
are a ton of great insights. If it wasnt for this book, my answer would have been
Zootopia! Thats deep movie with tons of messages similar to what Coveys book is all
about!
Dandan Zhu is a NYC-based entrepreneur, headhunter turned career coach,

feminist, and go-getter businesswoman.
Tune into The Daily DANDAN Podcast for career chats and inspiration!
Check out her website and career coaching business based on her expertise as a
headhunter, teaching the DANDAN Method to job search!
Dandan Global : Achieve the Life and Career You Envision!
Free articles on: http://linkedin.com/in/dandanzhu

20.8k Views View Upvotes
Blake
Ilstrup, Former naval ocer; current lawyer, biotech exec and
student of life
Written Mar 29, 2016
In February of 1994, I reported aboard the USS ARKANSAS (CGN 41) as a 22-year old
newly-commissioned naval ocer slated to take over as Fire Control Division Ocer
on a hulking nuclear-powered guided missile cruiser. It was the culmination of 4
years of naval science training, 3 summer training cruises on ships and submarines,
and 9 months of Surface Warfare Ocer School and technical courses. I was very
nervous, but also very condent that I was prepared and ready to tackle the challenge.
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I was clueless.
A mere two days after I reported aboard, we steamed out of a stormy san Francisco
Bay on the rst of two six-month deployments to the Persian Gulf. I had missed the
ships entire preparation period and was playing catch-up from day one. I was literally
and guratively wet behind the ears, and the other ocers and crew made sure I
knew it.
One morning about 2 weeks into the deployment as I was waiting for a meeting to
start in the Combat Systems oce, I was telling one of my fellow junior ocers that, if
I was going to get a maintenance project done that I had been assigned on time, I
needed about 5 more people from another division. One of the senior chief petty
ocers sitting next to me must have overhead me, because he poked me on the arm
and said (loud enough for his fellow chiefs to hear), Hey sir, do you know what you
need? More time on the planet! The oce erupted in laughter. I of course laughed
with them, while sulkily thinking how inappropriate it was for a senior enlisted
person to talk to an ocer like that
but then about an hour later, it dawned on me: He was DEAD RIGHT. I had been
taught how to navigate a ship in and out of port, but I didnt yet know how to navigate
the intricacies of shipboard organization in order to actually get things done. I had
been taught about the chain of command of a Navy ship, but I had not yet learned
about the chain of inuence.
The formal organizational chart of a US Navy ship looks as you might expect, and its
very similar to the org chart for a civilian corporate organization:
But although the org chart tells you who is responsible for what, it doesnt tell you
much about how to get something done.
Who really holds the power and ability to directly and eectively inuence action and
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change in others?
On a Navy ship, I think three things come into play: seniority (rank), number of direct
reports (how many people are directly supervised by that person), and the more
intangible element of inuence (experience, relationships and trust). If you think
purely in terms of rank and hierarchy, you may think that it works like this on a Navy
ship:
But in reality, it looks like this:
The senior enlisted sailors the Chief Petty Ocers are the ones who actually have
the power and inuence to get things done in the US Navy. They are the backbone.
They have the most experience and most direct contact with those actually doing the
work. Although they are very low in the pecking order of rank, they are very high in
the machinations of power.
As a junior ocer, which way would you look on a Navy ship to nd someone to help
you eect change and get things done up or down?
Based on some excellent advice given to me by another Chief early in my career, I
attached myself to my Chiefs hip. I got him what he said we needed, observed how he
applied tough love to our sailors, and then I mostly got out of the way. We developed a
relationship of trust: I kept him in the loop on the Internet
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needs of the mission and the
expectations for our division and he made it happen. It was exhilarating to watch him
make things happen.
As for the maintenance project I referred to earlier, it was a fairly complicated

refurbishment of a room-sized ammunition locker that was typically done a certain
way and always only by Fire Control Division sailors. No cross-pollination from ...
(more)
Lisa
Lin, mostly harmless
Written Dec 24, 2012 Upvoted by Jillian Ratli, Founder of Fear Monster
Obedience School
I was once talking to a mentor about how fear of rejection was stopping me from
taking risks, and he said, "What's the worst thing that can happen? They can say
No."
That's it. It's so simple and obvious, but it changed my perspective on so many things.
Whether rejection from a job, from a school or a fellowship, or rejection from a man,
in the end all they are saying to me is "No."
Not "you're stupid," or "you're not good enough," or "you're worthless," or "you're
ugly," or whatever other crazy ideas I come up with in the process of over-thinking
every rejection. Just a simple "No." That's it. The prospect of rejection is much less
daunting when you think of it as a simple "No" and move on, rather than dwelling on
all the other hidden implications-- which may or may not be real, but nevertheless get
compounded by over-thinkers like me.
Alex
Park, Writer, Storyteller, Founder of Tabulit (tabulitcomics.com)
Written Jan 15
Everything is a balance.
Its simple. Where there is happiness, there must be sadness. Where there is success,
there must be failure. Where there are riches, there is poverty.
We are often told to chase after one thing, and despair at the other. But Ive realized
that it most certainly isnt that at all. Life is littered with chance and coincidence, and
to think that you can control your life towards a certain direction and hold it there is
hubris at best.
Not knowing that things are uid and in balance, makes us chase after absolutes and
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result oriented goals that are potentially vapid in meaning.
I used to think that any failure in your life is simply something you needed to try as
hard as possible to avoid. I was so focused on this in college, to the point that I was
taking all these boring electives because I knew they would ensure an A at the end of
the day. But in fact, I was not challenging myself or growing in any way.
Only years later after graduation when I nally looked at my life, I knew that things
were always going to be up and down anyway. I shouldnt fear failure. Because success
follows failure, and failure follows success. There are no exceptions. Everyone has a
mix. Elon Musk may seem like a brilliant tech billionaire but he has three failed
marriages (two with the same woman), and his companies have had many near-death
experiences. Dov Charney was a brilliant retail genius, but his penchant for libertine
lifestyle dragged him back down to the bottom.
Knowing that things are in balance enables you to be humble during moments of
triumph, and hopeful during moments of diculty.
When I took in this one realization, I stopped chasing things. Things like happiness,
auence, renown, and even love. Instead I began to think more about how such
things mean to me in relation to the opposites. I do want happiness, I do want money,
and of course, I do want love. But I understand that happiness without sadness is
nothing. Money without diculty is meaningless. Love without negative emotions is
just, infatuation.
And now, I dont despair at the hard times anymore. I embrace them, and move
forward.
Photo credit: Austin Neill, Unsplash

Upvote 43 Downvote Comments 3
Yuri
Kruman, Russian from KY | Married French | Startup Exec |
Healthcare, Ex-Law/Fin
Updated Jun 27, 2016
Since you asked for ONE insight that most changed my life
And people have already listed several good habits related to exercise, diet, gratitude
and planning
I will list the single most important mindset/habit that has made all the
dierence for me, both through incredibly dicult times and through blissful
ones.
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The mindset that transcends all aspects of life, both material and spiritual, is
FILTERING.
What do I mean when I say you must acquire a mindset to FILTER everything that
comes your way?
I mean:
1. Filter what you put in your mouth, whether thats food or drink or
medicine. Dont let yourself eat or drink junk. Eat a balanced diet. Question
the medication prescribed to you to make sure its absolutely necessary and
has no less harsh or upsetting alternatives.
2. Filter what comes OUT of your mouth. Watch your speech carefully. Listen
rst and speak only later. Be concise and to the point. Strive to contribute
something positive and useful to the other person when speaking.
3. Filter what comes into your ears and your eyes. Listen only to people and
to music that enrich your life in some way. Avoid things that are harmful to
your eyes and mental and physical well-being. Read books that improve your
life in some tangible way.
4. Filter the people you spend time with. Youre the average of the 5 people
you spend most of your time with. Choose very carefully and pare away
people from your circle that drain your energy and bring bad things like
envy/jealousy, gossip/slander and worse. Life is too short to deal with a-holes
that prevent you from achieving your potential.
5. Filter carefully how you spend your time. Ask, is what I'm doing right now
getting me closer to my goals as a human, professional, family member, artist,
scientist, etc.? If not, drop it and do something more productive/constructive
ASAP. Seek meaningful experiences above accumulating material goods that
add little to your life. Take a digital Sabbath at least one day a week. Stop all
electronics 23 hours before bed.
6. Filter the information streams that come your way. Pare away garbage
that brings out the worst human emotions in you (jealousy, envy, anger, hate,
etc). Block people and inuences in your life that take away from your
precious time and ability to focus. Organize your information streams
(especially in email, online and on social media) in a way that is manageable,
thorough and available for you to access when you have the bandwidth.
7. Filter your spiritual inuences. Each person has his path in life and sooner
or later seeks a spiritual guide. Find one that shows before he tells and leads
by example. Favor actions over words in those whose model you follow
spiritually.
8. Adjust and clean your lters periodically. People change and mature with
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age. What worked at 20 may no longer work at 25 or 30 and what did it for you
at 30 wont do at 40. Everything in moderation Especially moderation :)
Once youve acquired a ltering mindset, you will have acquired higher standards,
condence in your own abilities and independence from the many corrupting forces
all around you.
Time to get to work!
________________________________________________________
Want to learn more about the Success Mindset?
Visit BlueprintToThrive.com
Upvote 120 Downvote Comment
Joshua
Otusanya, Accountant, Stand up Comedian, Former Division 1
Athlete
Written Wed
The single insight that changed my life the most came from a random YouTube video
I discovered called How Bad Do You Want It?
It was a video of a football player named Giavanni Run going through a grueling
training routine. He consistently puts himself through this routine with dreams of
one day becoming a professional football player.
The video is narrated by a motivational speaker named Eric Thomas. At the 3 minute
mark of this video, Eric Thomas says an incredibly powerful quote:
When you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe, then you will be
successful.
Just think about that.
When you are gasping or struggling to breathe, you dont care about parties, going on
a date with your crush, or being cool with your friends. You dont care about school.
You dont care about buying nice clothes. You dont care about anything besides
getting fresh air.
You have to want success as bad as you want to breathe.

Ive taken this quote to heart because you only have one chance at life. If you only
have one chance at life, why not work for what you want?
My name is Joshua Otusanya and one of the hardest journeys I have embarked on so
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far is learning the art of stand up comedy. Performing at open mics every single night
can be brutal, sometimes waiting until 1 oclock in the morning to perform in front of
only 3 people. Ive been at it for almost a year and a half now and Ive developed self-
discipline, hard work, and perseverance. Below is a video of me performing at my last
show on January 26th:
What Ive learned from Eric Thomas quote is that at the end of the day, if its worth
having then its worth ghting for. Im fully condent in what I know I will
accomplish in my lifetime. Its only a matter of time :)
His quote changed my life forever. Hopefully it changes yours too.
Peace and Love,
Josh O
To follow my journey, subscribe to my YouTube channel -> ThisisJoshO
Photo Copyright: Rice Consulting

Anonymous
Written Dec 22, 2012
Compounding is the most powerful force in life
Albert Einstein once [allegedly] said compound interest is the most powerful force in
the universe. I don't know if Einstein actually said it, but the statement stuck with me
growing up.
Compounding isn't just a monetary concept. The life we live is the result of seemingly
insignicant actions compounding into signicant outcomes.
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Babar
Khan
Javed, read "Adulting: How to Become a Grown-up in 468
Easy(ish) Steps Book"
Written Nov 7
Realizing the hard way that
just because you are related to someone doesnt mean you are obligated to
tolerate their BS for the rest of your life.
your boss isnt being mean because he hates you or wants to hurt your
feelings, only that he really wants you to do what is necessary for the task
at hand. If you feel verbally & emotionally abused, speak up. If nothing
changes and its hurting your emotional state, quit and be clear in your exit
interview.
everyone is ghting a battle, no matter how perfect their lives may appear
to be, the choice is whether to let the negatives or past dene you or rise
above it.
adding value to your clients is much more valuable than being a graduate
from a top ranking MBA program.
emotionally & verbally abusive people have no right to exist in my life, have
cut o most of them.
anyone who isnt adding tangible or intangible positive life force into me
has no place near me.
there is more to be gained from letting go of grudges, the past, regrets etc
than hanging on.
no matter how rich & powerful they are, emotionally and verbally abusive
people are not worth the time or eort.
it pays in immeasurable ways to be always be kind to strangers.

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Curt
Tigges, Existentialist and secular Buddhist with transhumanist
leanings
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Form is emptiness, and emptiness is form.
As an implication of that, all things are one.
The movie "The Fountain" was, to me, a beautiful expression of this idea, though not
the rst time I encountered it. The realization has hit me several times throughout my
life, often with such intensity that tears would overwhelm me--even though I almost
never otherwise cry.
I don't pretend to be enlightened, nor do I pretend that I can feel this way all the time.
But I have had experiences when I saw, felt, and realized it all so clearly that at least
some part of the idea is present with me every day.
I gained this understanding emotionally through meditation, and logically through

philosophy. What I mean by this statement is that there are no "things;" our ideas
divide the world into categories and objects, but these categories and objects do not
fundamentally exist. The universe is, in reality, a vast undierentiated howling
swarm of patterns, particles, and energy (though even those are "things," so even my
expression of this thought is incorrect).
Mathematics, ideas, thoughts, and so on are only models. Just tools by which we try
to predict and understand the world. Nothing about them is inherent to reality. Even
the purest mathematics may not have their root in reality, since in some cases
dierent mathematical models can be used to describe the same thing (as in non-
Euclidean geometry).
What it means:
I can't explain the full realization here, or the thoughts that led to it, but I can outline
what follows from it--at least for me.
1. There is no death, and no birth; only transformation. In a way, I am the re-

embodiment of a million souls. Not in a metaphysical sense, but in the sense that the
lives, genes, ideas, writings, and so on of millions of others have been transmitted to
me and make part of who I am. When this body expires, I will not have died, for the
eect of "my" existence has been transmitted to others.
2. There is no good and no evil. There is pain, yes; there is suering, there is joy, and so
on. But morality as a "thing" or principle is only imaginary. There's only the question
of how one can most eectively achieve one's goals--whether those are to diminish
suering in the world, bring joy to others, or even just make oneself happier.
3. Nothing that happens is truly good or truly bad. This doesn't mean that there is
nothing to strive for, because there is much to be found in striving for something; but
fundamentally, everything is ok, even if the universe ends in entropy.
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Like I said, I haven't yet fully integrated this into my thinking and perceiving
processes, but it is a basic foundation to which I return again and again, and which I
constantly try to keep in my mind.
Katie
Bremer, LIFE!
It's my life. I'm in charge of it.
Blaming others for trivial bullshit just doesn't make any sense. Looking to others to
solve my problems is, most of the time, not useful for anyone.
If I'm not happy, it's up to me to x it. If something isn't working right, I can likely
gure out a solution.
It's healthy to rely on others to an extent, but we are, I think, far more independent
than some of us are inclined to let ourselves believe.
Nelson
Wang, Published on Forbes, Time, Inc - Founder of
www.CEOLifestyle.io
Written Apr 3, 2016
But my parents want me to pursue (insert career, love interest, any other goal here).
If only I went to a better school, then I would have been really successful.
If I was born into a wealthy family, well gosh, of course I'd be a great businessman. But I
wasn't.
Know what these all have in common? They're excuses.
After 31 years of living, I nally realized this:

You're responsible for your own life.
Want your dream job? Learn the skills necessary to crush it in that role. Take time to
sit down with the right mentors who have done it before. Come up with creative ideas
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like a video resume.
Want to fall in love? Talk to the the cute girl that you see in the coee shop. Get over
being shy. Learn to genuinely connect with others.
Want to travel the world? Get your passport out, map out places to go, save up for a few
months and make it happen.
Want to start you own company? Identify a huge problem, come up with the solution
and launch your company.
This is your life. Take control and be the CEO of it.
When you nally take responsibility for your life:
You learn to stop blaming others
You accept your mistakes and learn from them
You start taking action instead of moping around
You realize how important it is to be the best version of yourself
You grow as a person
Stop complaining. Be awesome instead.
For more motivation subscribe to my site CEO Lifestyle.

Sanidhya
Khilnani, a slightly irreverent & mostly irrelevant, eve-teased
adam
Written Feb 26, 2013
An Indian Vedanta Scholar, Dr. Jaya Row, discusses the following formula for
happiness as the essence of Vedantic learning:
Desires fullled
Happiness = -----------------------------------------------
Desires harbored
Stated simply, she intends to convey that our happiness is directly proportional to the
desires we fulll and inversely proportional to the desires we harbor in our body
(physical desires), mind (emotional desires) and intellect (intellectual desires). If one
has too many unfullled desires, then this ratio of fullled to harbored desires is very
low and one is in a state of agitation or sadness. This formula also explains the ebbs
and ows in our level of general happiness as a function dependent on our ever
changing desires (fullled and unfullled). It implies that desire-lessness is not a
necessary condition for happiness. As long as you have a healthy ratio you can be
relatively happy. However, to attain eternal bliss / enlightenment / innite
happiness / nirvana, the state of desire-lessness (Zero desires) is a requirement.
One caveat that goes with this formula, is that it does not imply that desires should be
suppressed or restricted (a suppressed desire is also a harbored desire). Suppression
leads to even more agitation. Dierent schools of philosophy have dierent ways of
dealing with desires. Vedanta for example, teaches us to discipline the body, mind
and intellect through the practices of yogas (karma, bhakti & jnana) and detach
ourselves from the fruits of our desires thereby sublimating instead of suppressing
them.
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Marshall
Karp, Author
Updated Mon
At the age of 39 I had it all. A loving wife, two fantastic kids, an apartment in New
York City, a house in the country, new car, nice vacations and a high paying job as
Creative Director of a hot creative advertising agency.
Everyone wanted to be me.
Except me.
On the outside I was the poster boy for Happy Successful Man Who Has His Whole
Future Ahead Of Him. But deep down inside I was miserable.
I began to assault myself daily with that ve word mantra. The one that so many of us
begin muttering when they nd themselves wandering through that unfamiliar,
unsettling neighborhood known as midlife.
Is this all there is?
We dont ask ourselves that question when were 25. Its still too early in the rst
quarter of the game. We caught the ball on the ve yard line and were making our
way up the eld.
But at 39, its halftime. Do the math. The average man is going to live till the age of 78.
I was on the back nine.
I know your actual mileage may vary. You could get killed falling o a ladder at age
60. Or at the age of 100 you could fall o a hooker. Theres a lot of latitude in The
Middle. But somewhere between 30 and 50 youre halfway done. Its up to you to
decide when to look at the face in the mirror and say:
Is this all there is?
No. Theres a whole lot more. And Im going to tell you how to get there. Tonight Im
going to send someone to your house. Hes a teenager, about 17 or 18. He doesnt know
much about life what teenager does? But he knows whats cool. And after talking to
you for a couple of hours, hes going to be able to zero in on whats a cool new
direction for you to head in.
In fact, by the end of the evening, this kid is going to completely outline and plan the
second half of your life. And thats what youll do. Trust me, it will be cool.
Whats that you say? Thats the dumbest damn thing you ever heard? Why should you
let some teenage kid with no world experience plan the second half of your life?
My answer is, why did you let him plan the rst half?
This rut that youre stuck in, this life that youre trapped in, who planned it? Not you.
Not the YOU you are now. Most of us form our lifes plans shortly after high school.
Maybe were 16, maybe were 23, but for the most part were still kids. And then once
we make a plan, we stick with it.
That was my insight. I was pushing 40 and still living the dream of some teenage kid.
That kid didnt exist anymore, and yet I was still following the path he laid out for me.
Most kids cant project past next Saturday, much less conjure up what your life could
be like 25 years down the road.
That was the moment I decided that the 40 year old me should start planning the life
of the 60 year old me and beyond.
I was at the top of the ladder, and I suddenly realized I didnt need one more rung. I
wanted to nd a new ladder.
I did. Climbing that ladder was at times terrifying,Internet

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but never boring. Today I have all
the things I had at the age of 39 and more. But this time around Im deliriously happy
with who I am and where I am. I still have dreams for the future, but I no longer wake
up in the morning, look in the mirror and ask is this all there is?
My Act Two was conceived, written, produced, and directed by an adult. And Im
grateful for the insight that convinced him to take on the job.
EDIT - JANUARY 30, 2017: Dear People of Quora. I am overwhelmed by your

response to my post. Not because the number of views and upvotes have skyrocketed,
but because most of the comments and the private messages have asked me for more.
Lots more.
One commenter, Traci Amick, said it like this: Marshall, Marshall, Marshall... You
can't leave us hanging! When you made the decision to redirect and change your life
what and how did you do it?
There was a reason I left you hanging. Ill get to that in a minute. But rst, let me give
you a brief (and I do mean brief) overview of what happened after the light bulb went
on.
Here I was, pushing 40. At my core Im a writer, but somewhere along the way the ad
agency that hired me to write ads promoted me and paid me more money to stop
writing and start managing. I wore suits, spent a lot more face time with clients, and I
supervised a hundred other people. And while it was often gratifying, I realized that
my career had stolen the one thing I loved doing most. Writing.
My solution was to start writing on my own. Over the course of countless nights and
weekends I wrote a play, Squabbles, a comedy. Two years later it ran for eight weeks in
a dinner theatre in Kansas City. (Since then it has played in thousands of theatres
around the US.)
Shortly after Squabbles opened, ABC-TV asked me to turn it into a pilot for a sitcom. It
didnt y, but now I was an accredited pilot writer, and for the next 6 years I kept my
day job as an advertising agency Creative Director, and developed TV pilots for the
networks on my own time. Its unusual for a pilot to get picked up for a series, but two
of mine did. I was 45 when the second one got picked up, and I decided to make the
leap. I left advertising for TV.
I went to Hollywood, but it wasnt fair to uproot my wife and kids to chase my dream,
so they stayed in New York. I ew home as often as I could, which wasnt often
enough. Many of you asked if my quest for a new career wrecked my marriage. Just
the opposite. After two years, despite the fact that I was on the fast track, I left
Hollywood and came back to what was most important to me my family.
There were some TV writing opportunities in New York, and I wrote a movie script
which I sold and produced, and then out of nowhere a whole new creative
avenue opened up. The Internet.
I caught the wave early. I opened Compelling Content, an Internet advertising agency,
sold it ve years later, and eventually zeroed in on the nal frontier for every writer. A
novel.
That took ve years, and in 2006, I published The Rabbit Factory, my rst crime
ction novel. Today Im a #1 best selling author, with ve books of my own, and the
coauthor of the NYPD Red series with James Patterson.
I didnt mention that in the original post because I didnt want to be thrown o Quora
for shameless self-promotion.
Im not on Quora to sell my books. Im here to exchange information, to share
experiences, to give and take bits and pieces of life magic. I love this forum, and Im
grateful that one of my posts could resonate with so many of you.
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One nal note: Eight days after my original post I have a quarter of a million views,
3300 upvotes, and over 100 comments and messages. In the beginning, I responded
to the comments, but Ive reached the point where I no longer can. I wish I could, but
I have to get back to my day job. Writing.
At the moment, Im working on NYPD Red 5 with James Patterson. But this
experience on Quora, especially your comments and messages, has made me realize
that there are a lot of people out there going through the same mid life career angst
that I went through. And that the 60,000 word version of my story just might make an
interesting book.
Upvote 9.3k Downvote Comments 199+
Abhishek
Mishra, alive and kicking.
The joke mentioned in the movie Watchmen (2009) :
Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life is harsh and cruel. Says he feels all
alone in a threatening world. Doctor says, "Treatment is simple. The great clown
Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go see him. That should pick you up." Man bursts into
tears. Says, "But doctor... I am Pagliacci."
(quoted from IMDB)
Larry
Histon, inmate San Quentin State Prison
Written Jan 19, 2013
My incarceration caused me to focus on the relationships most people hold precious

in their lives. In the past, I didn't nurture my relationships with my sisters, nieces,
nephews, and cousins. They are the same people, who came to my rescue with
comforting words of encouragement and support continually during my high and low
periods of incarceration.
It has been a very humbling experience for me to discover how many of my relatives
clung to small and very simple gestures of concern and love from me when they
visited me in prison.
Their genuine concern and love for me expressed through letters,special occasion
cards,and limited phone calls, helped me over the years to become a better
brother,uncle, and cousin to them during my incarceration.
Now, I can't stop thinking about how much I want to love them, and express my love
to them in appreciation of their genuine love for me. Due to my incarceration, I've
never been to a family reunion, wedding, or graduation of my relatives who live out of
state. Whether it is just having the opportunity to hang-out with them or a see them at
a special event, I anxiously look forward to that opportunity sometime in the future.
All communications between inmates and external channels are facilitated by

approved volunteers since inmates do not have access to the internet. This program
with Quora is part of The Last Mile San Quentin. Twitter: @TLM

Jorge
Heredia, inmate San Quentin State Prison
Written Jan 9, 2013
In mid 1999, I was going through one of those blue-mood days in which I felt the
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necessityto talk with a member of my family.So in an attempt to appease my
wretched soul, I calledcollect to my oldest sister. Much to my surprise, she was still
upset that I was in prison. Therefore, when she answered my call her initial words
were full of contempt,and rhetorically said to me: "Ahara que es lo que vas hacer, uno
mas del manton o vas hacer la diferencia," which means,
"Now what are you going to do, are you going to be one more out of the bunch or are
you going to make the dierence? Basically, she was trying to encourage me to use my
time wisely, rather than, helplessly like many other inmates, lettingtime consume me.
Although I realized she was right, her words were like sharp darts that sunk straight
into my heart. Especially because she had always been a very sweet sister to me, and I
was not expectingsuch a scornful reaction from her.
I couldn't say anything and hung up the phone and went straight back to my cell.
For weeks while ruminatingabout my sister's words, I did a lot of soul searching.
Psychologically, to stay grounded and nd my true identity,I tried to go back in time
to reconnect myself with my ancestors' roots. During this trance-like state, I
realizedthat I was the sum of the hopes and dreams of my parents and all of my
grandparents. I thought about how I would have felt if I would have had childrenof
my own.
I know I would have wanted for them the best and to become as productive as they
could ever be within society.With this image in mind I realizedthat my parents'
parents also dreamed for me to live a better life. At this point in time, I said to myself:
"Iowe it to them."
However,in order for me to live up to their dreams and to live up to the sacrices they
made to make my existence possible, I needed to become an intellectual warrior to
fend for myself.Therefore, despite the stages whereI have been in my life I commit
myself to honor my parents, all the way back to my very rst grandparents, all of
whom gave me life and live on in me. I want to make them proud by being the best I
can be even from within the walls of prison and hopefully beyond them in the future.
That's whenI began to transform myself at all costs, and refused to concedeto my
imprisonment.
All communications between inmates and external channels are facilitated by

approved volunteers since inmates do not have access to the internet. This program
with Quora is part of The Last Mile San Quentin. Twitter: @TLM
Christoph
Richter, works at Intellyo
Decide. And x it on the way.
That's for me the most simple and most stunning change you can make.
There is such a vast of decisions, that are delayed because people think they need to
wait for a better answer, and in the end the time lost doing one or the other made the
result worthless...
I could not built a single company, without following this rule.
In the vast majority of the cases, it does not matter at rst, for what way you decide.
And on the way of doing it, you see its benets and pitfalls. Then you have a much
better knowledge to decide, if you want to take the additional cost of switching the
paths, or its okay to stay on that one.
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This is in so many cases more ecient, than waiting. I never expected that.
Lets take the possibilities when you wait:

The opportuinty window of the decision in the rst place gets lost.
This happens more often than you think. that you wait, if you should take the
Job oered, or go for a travel with a friend.
Following the better path is now much harder.

Here most of the time, you want to decide for a small fast gain, or a big gain
that takes more work. But due that you could not decide, the small gain is
now nearly as hard, as the bigger gain in the rstplace.
i.e. when you decide what route to take to your holiday. Sitting there an
studying the maps for an half an hour.
You make guesses and use time on stu, that you can have for free later.
i.e. choosing that one line, that you should write on your frontpage/business
cards etc.
Just deside for one that's "OK", and then wait for feedback. And change it
when you nd the best one while sitting on the toilet... :-)
So, and what can happen, when you decide early?

It can be plain wrong. True. But most of the time, it does not matter. admit it,
take the additional work to change it to the other part, and you will never
think of, what happened, if you would have chosen it.
you can save a lot of time. Most of the questions you ask yourself are not that
important. people tend to overthink stu.
you can nd a much better solution.

Working with one way gives you much more insight, than delaying going any
way. therefore you have much better data, and maybe there's anyway a third
path that you have to go later....
Hope this now helps you, in deciding a little bit faster.
There's one insight, that changed my life even more.

But it is much more complicated to explain.
its "the world is your imagination"...
Julian
Kingman, Entrepreneur & mystic
Written Jan 4, 2013
The single insight that most changed my life was also my rst powerful mystical
experience.
I had joined a meditation course, and as I simply concentrated on my breathing, I

noticed how scattered and untamed my mind was. Shortly thereafter, it felt as though
someone took the volume knob to my thoughts and turned it to zero. ZERO! Zero....
Wow, what a feeling. For that split second, I felt truly free. In that split second, I
learned things that changed the course of my life.
I learned that I am not my thoughts. I learned that in any given moment of my life,
I've had thoughts to some degree (the depth of thought is incredible, think of an
iceberg). I learned that in their absence, there's a wonderful, all-encompassing peace.
I learned that the real me is this conscious awareness, and that it exists beyond time,
and beyond space, and that our bodies and lives are a vehicle for it. I understood what
was meant by "being" in various religious texts. I gured that if there was such a thing
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Most of all, I realized that I wanted to live that way, 100% of the time. That aim is what
I now know to be enlightenment, and I aim to achieve it. Now I've changed in many
small ways towards that goal, and my life has changed in many small ways, as well.
The steps toward the goal is a process of acquiring self-knowledge, and overcoming
inner darkness. This actually changes a person, so I'm dierent than when I began my
journey (I feel dierent). So the 2nd most powerful thing was learning how to do this.
It's a practical thing, and some techniques need to be learned, which I learned from
what the spiritual author Belsebuub teaches, but it's been taught in various ways
throughout history. He's published free ebooks and articles that explain how to do
this.
Aritra
Sen, Has a Phd in failure. :D
That I have to move on.
When I was 12-13 years old, midway to be exact , I had a friend- a best-friend,
sweetheart, call whatever you please. To me she was everything. We practically grew
up together right from our "diaper days".
I got bullied and misunderstood a lot during my childhood due to my gifted-ness and
other related issues. When my parents had a hard time understanding me, she was
always there. She had this special insight or skill and looked straight through me, she
did. I never had to explain my eccentricities to her. She was gorgeous in her own
aspect- big eyes, curly black hair and a bigger heart than any I have ever seen. She was
the part of me that kept me ticking during my times of depression. I was accepted and
for people out there who know what acceptance feels like, you can relate when I say it
is bliss. Rather it was.
On April the 2nd, of that fateful year, she died in front of me. We were crossing the
street and she got run over and had 6 fractures on her ribs, and her clavicles snapped.
She oozed a pool of blood for a minute and then she died. It was terrible, traumatizing
and painful to watch. My memory of that incident is quite vivid.
You can follow this link for the details of it all:- Aritra Sen's answer to Which is the
most emotional short story?
It took me years to bring myself to write that but acceptance is the rst step to
realizing a cure
Anyway, after that I couldn't talk for a couple of months. Therapy helped a bit but I
never had a fully functioning relationship after that. As in I couldn't bring myself to
invest myself in one. I still looked for her in people I started liking and it made my life
miserable.
I am 22 now, proceeding on with my life and though I have survived a lot till date, she
has always been a spot in me that I turned to in moments of crisis. But yes, I have
come to terms with reality that I have to move on. I must. And I am ready. She will
stay alive with me. Always. And I don't have any problems accepting that and I am
quite vocal about it. Having said that, I am ready to look beyond her and appreciate
the good stu, the unique traits that dene each one of us and accept them as she
accepted me once. That is the single most important insight that changed my life
which is:-
NO MATTER WHAT, YOU HAVE TO MOVE ON AND ACCEPTANCE IS VITAL

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Prakhar
Ajabe, Genius has side-eects
Fight Club (1999 movie)

Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit
we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We
have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great
Depression is our lives
Mohammed
Islam, I've lived the good life and the bad
Practice the fundamentals, lay down proper foundations.
Growing up wearing glasses and being good at math meant I also enjoyed playing
chess.
But I'm terrible at chess.
I've had a Chess.com account for almost 5 years. They start you at 1200, I
immediately went down below 1000.
So what happened in February of 2014?
I got a job in an oce with avid chess players and they started kicking my ass, as
expected. But one of them was kind enough to direct me to ChessMaster, a chess
learning tool. There's a particular version that's narrated by Joshua Waitzkin (the real
life person from Searching for Bobby Fischer) that I found.
So what did this game teach that resulted in elevating me from a 1000 to a 1300
player? Fundamentals of chess. Not the rules, the fundamentals.
What are fundamentals? In chess you can learn that the bishop moves in diagonals
and knights move in an L-shape, these are rules. But in ChessMaster, I was trained in
how to fork two pieces using bishops and knights. How to pin a piece down using the
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queen. How to skewer the queen by checking the king with a rook. These (the fork,
pin, and skewer) are some fundamentals.
Usually when learning something new, after learning the rules, the next step should
be to lay down the foundations through practicing the fundamentals. But I, and just
about every amateur chess player, skip the foundation part and went straight to
playing the game. Why? Cause it's booooring. ChessMaster had me doing drills that
would have been God-awful boring to me as a child when I rst started playing.
The amateur learns some rules and then jumps right into playing. Maybe they have
some talent and are able to beat a few, but then hey hit their plateau and never
advance. That's how I felt about chess for years.
Fundamentals and laying down foundations, can be applied to anything in life.

I've used this technique to gain more mastery over other aspects of my life, and I can
see examples of it in other successful ventures:
Programming: Studied design patterns
Kung Fu: Practice body mechanics, statics and dynamics of physical motion.
Relationship: Communication and personal emotional stability
Age of Empires: Build up resource gathering in the beginning of the game to

power your military in the later part of the game
American Civil War: The Norths investment in communication and

transportation (Telegraph and Railroads)
The dierence between an amateur and a master: the masters experience in

fundamentals. What does a master have mastery in? Understanding rules better?
Some sort of magic intuition? Genius level thinking? No, masters have put in
ridiculous amounts of boring elbow grease in non-sexy things that are the
foundations of their topic.
You may now be wondering ok, so why are you now stuck at a 1300 level? The
answer is simple and also a powerful example of the importance in fundamentals:
I practiced ChessMaster for only a couple weeks. That's it. I got side-tracked and
lazy and stopped. So only a couple weeks of training and such a huge eect. And once
I stopped practicing fundamentals, I stopped growing.
Matthew
Schainker, Not an expert
"You can be happy" is denitely #1 on my list. Seems simple, but it took me a while to
get that one.
So you can be happy! Great. Next question: how should I act / what should I do?
There's no universal answer, of course. But there is a helpful re-phrasing I really like,
after a bit of scratch-work:
(A). Your fate is both predestined and the result free will. The start and end points of
your life are predestined by denition. It is predetermined that you have the genes
you have when born and that you start where you do. It is predetermined that you
will die.
(B). You are dened by your actions. You are not dened by your thoughts, or your
feelings, but by how you exercise your free will to make choices to act or not to act -
or react to things outside of your control.
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If you take A and B as true, then the following must also be true:
How you choose to get from the start to the end is not merely "up to you." It is "you."
Except for birth and death, you are your fate. Put another way, if you dene birth,
death, and your choices about your actions in between as your "character", then
character is fate (see Herakleitos).
Then, life's key questions of "How should I act?" and "What should I do?" are
circumvented, since you are your fate / character is fate. So the re-phrased questions
become "What am I?" and "What is my character?" To me, for some reason the second
two questions are much easier than the rst two. I think it's easier to ask about my
character as a person than what I should do with my life. Therefore, these are more
productive questions (at least for me). To gure out what to do, gure out what you
are.
"If I am not for myself, then who will be for me? If I am only for myself, then what am
I? And if not now, when?"
-Rabbi Hillel
Michael
Akintunde, I like people.
Written Apr 14, 2016
Pain is Temporary.
If you're going through emotional distress, you'll eventually get over it.
If you injure yourself, your body will heal itself (given you've had adequate rest!)
If a particularly dicult and taxing task lies ahead of you, you'll eventually conquer
it.
To this end, you cannot improve yourself without going through a period of struggle
rst.
For example, if you want to build muscle, you must go through the painful process of
tearing down your muscle bres rst. They will repair, ending up stronger and bigger
than before.
Many people mistakenly fear pain and avoid it at all costs.
The key is to embrace pain and know that when it subsides, you are guaranteed to end
up on the other side as a better version of yourself.
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Mike
Xie, in love and always will be, Top Writer 2013 & 2015
Updated Mar 9, 2014
There are no blueprints, no preset paths for happy endings, anyone who wants one has
to write their own(Mike Xie). Each of us has to nd their own path(Will Wister).
On a long enough time horizon, the distribution of our talents is completely eclipsed by
the aggregate of our choices. We are all capable of improvement. We just have to
commit. And stay committed. People become experts at what they choose to excel in not
how they go about doing it(Oliver Emberton).
Most of all though, you have to believe. I believe the greatest gift one can give to someone
is the gift of self improvement. And guess who is the only person you have to live with
for the rest of your life every moment of your life? Yourself. You have to love yourself. You
have to stay committed to loving yourself and giving to yourself and making time to
always improve yourself. Other people treat you how you treat yourself (Wendy Chen).
And again, you're the only person you have to live with your entire life. You don't get to
pick the protagonist of your story but you do get to pick your supporting cast (Mike Xie).
And if you think of people in terms of what they do rather than who they are you can
start trimming your relationships so that you have an environment that supports your
ambitions. Just because you grew up in a broken family doesn't mean your story is
destined to be a tragedy. You can nd people to love and support you. You just have to
believe you are worthy of love. You have to believe that there are good people in this
world [1]. You know it's true. There are people in this world who believe in charity. There
are literally organizations in this world that exist because they acknowledge that while
this world is not perfect nor fair, that in a better world it should be and they exist in
order to bridge that gap. For example, Demolay, Boy Scouts, Habitats for Humanity,
Rotary Club, Key Club, just to name a few.
And it's easy to identify individuals to reach out to. The most accomplished, busy and
productive people in this world (generally speaking they are further along in life because
they've found who they wanted to be) are often times the kindest[2] . And this is NOT a
coincidence. You can't get anywhere signicant in this world and stay there in the long
term without possessing magnanimous character (And one of the most important things
when it comes to being a person of magnanimous character is paying it forward and
helping those less further along.), a strong drive to make the world (the denition of
providing value, markets reward you for providing value, not labor, not eort, but
value) a better place and an absurdly strong network (what a network does is literally
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support you whenever you try to do something ambitious, whenever you have a chance
to fail, if it's strong enough, it supports you while you are in the middle and catches you
when you fail so you can get up and try again).
And once you dig yourself out. Once you decide that you're going to be the hero of your
story which is of course going to be a case study of the power of love to heal and to inspire
and to recreate and to pay it forward. Once you know in your mind and then your heart
and then your bones that your choices matter and that you have full responsibility and
power over your destiny. Once you've surrounded yourself with people who love and
support the person you aspire to be. Once you've decided how you're going to contribute
to making this world a better and gentler and kinder place everything changes. You'll
know why you were here and you'll feel immensely guilty watching that rerun of
Madmen when you could be teaching oratory or mentoring lost high school boys or
putting together a pitch for angel investors and rallying the troops.
Anyways I know what I'm going to do with my the rest of my life (become an entrepeneur
and employ people because it is a sin to be idle and most people aren't so ambitious but
they do love to work and be useful and be directed according to Jason M. Lemkin and
Michael Wolfe and then a philanthropist, a patron for the arts, education reform and a
contributor to the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation and work until the day I crumble
into dust at 130 when I've decided to take it easy and be a guest professor/motivational
speaker/501c head) and a thing takes as long as it needs to take (step 0 of dating, x
your godamn life according to Kai Peter Chang, for me that was 23.5 years. get my
Masters in CS, ideally at Stanford, probably 1 year if I just focus on learning and
leverage my PhD in math/CS/physics friends and fail to raise funding/get a team
together soon) and I'd love to ramble on but I'll just leave you with this poem of mine.
"To Write A Love Story"
There are no blueprints, no preset paths for happy endings, anyone who wants one has
to write their own.
In the end our choices matter far more,

Than where or how or when we start our lives.
Its always harder to act than to not,
To make than destroy, to live than exist,
And do the right thing when no one else will,
And get what we know we deserve from life,
And follow our hearts and chase our dreams.
In the end our courage matters far more,
Than our class, our race, our age, our gender.
Gandhi said the truth is self evident,
We just have to be brave enough to see,
That our acts of love do have an impact!
The only things that keeps this world alive,
are the forgiveness and understanding
We give each other as imperfect souls.
In the end we can only get as much,
As we are willing to give to others,
And as we are willing to get in return
Because the truth is we only exist,
To be happy and help each other grow
And make the world a better place for all
In the end our lives are simply too short,
To be spent doing anything except
The things that we love, that give us meaning
And with people we love and love us back.
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I don't know who you are but I love and you know in your heart of hearts that you should
too. I wish you all the best. I'd love if you followed my journey at The Sound of Wings.
Love,
Mike Xie
Stephen
Newton, Product Manager, writer, dad, and geek.
That with enough love, patience, and open communication I could save my marriage.
In addition to respect and love, I was taught if a marriage started to get into trouble
these tools would help you get through any problem. When things started to go wrong
in my marriage I doubled-down on trying this formula. After two years, the marriage
ended in an incredibly painful fashion.
My insight: you alone--regardless of the eort you put into it--cannot make a
marriage work. Your partner must want it as much as you do especially when times
become dicult.
That probably seems obvious (hindsight always is) but when your in the thickest part
of trying to salvage a marriage things aren't always so clear.
Heidi
McDonald, If it's creative, I probably do it.
The realization that I really did want children changed everything. I had baby
fear. I didn't like kids, didn't want them, and could never picture myself having them,
being any good as a parent, or ever enjoying being around them. I had a life plan that
would be made very inconvenient or even impossible, were I to have them.
My rst pregnancy was unexpected. I was unmarried and a student, and derived my
income from being a musician (long hours, sporadic, and dependent on looks). I had
several available solutions...abortion, adoption...some which arguably would have
made more logical sense than going through with the pregnancy at that point in time.
But, once I saw that little heartbeat on the sonogram monitor, it was all over. Period. I
loved that little thing more than life itself, and I wanted it, no matter what. I am still
pro-choice. I still believe that it's a very personal choice for each woman, which has
costs no matter which decision is made. But for me...seeing that little blinking
heartbeat...that was that, and the life that has followed is a very dierent one than
anything I'd prepared for or envisioned. In the best possible ways.
Alex
K.
Chen, InquilineKea, seeks timeless, context-independence
existence
Updated Jul 27, 2016
We often shouldnt seek to be really good competitors. We should seek to be really
good monopolists - Peter Thiel (from Is Peter Thiel correct that individuals should be
less concerned with competition and more focused on creating creative monopolies? )
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THIS made me so much happier in so many ways.
I used to be unhappy much of the time because I couldn't be the best at anything
competitive (lack of patience with practice could be a major factor, but there are other
factors too). I was never a great Age of Empires II player (never going above the "low-
intermediate" skill level), I don't excel in most competitions, and I don't get the best
grades. I used to want to be recognized for being at the top, and it made me unhappy
because I couldn't get there. It also made me a bit more reluctant to help others, too.
But now I know that I have special talent in something. I don't even know how to
describe it - it's just that so many people have given me that message - such that it's
possible that all of them might be onto something. All I know is that I have some sort
of monopoly on some diverse set of skills that have potential to produce value
sometime, and in the end, that's what matters [1]. It's much easier to produce value
when you're not doing something that hundreds of other people are doing. Just as
importantly, it makes me want to help others more.
Plus, knowing that people value me for something unique (that's hard to throw away),
I don't have to feel so freaking insecure all the time anymore. I don't have to be valued
for being "top" at something they widely respect. I just have to be dierent. Kind of
similar to this: Dimensionality-- and also, a theory about the rarity of female
programmers.
[1] Also, given that the unique spectrum of skills that everyone holds is so unique (due
to combinatorial eects), I think more people can also be in the position of holding
monopolies too..
Nan
Waldman, former sta attorney/Education Advocacy Program at
Disability Rights Legal Center
Written Oct 17, 2011
Originally Answered: What is the one insight that changed your life the most?
I do not matter.
What matters is what I do.
This helps to focus on serving others, instead of ego.
I arrived at this insight when I discovered I was having conicts with those I
considered to be idiotic or negligent -- medical and educational professionals with
the responsibility for my child's life. Here's one example:
We were standing near the elevators of a famous hospital when a senior medical
specialist who happened to be a professor 'stopped by' while waiting for the elevator
and decided to have a little 'chat' with my child's parent. Me. This was in the day
when privacy was of little concern.
"Oh Nan -- I just wanted to mention it would be helpful to have your child undergo xyz
procedures regularly so we can watch anatomically what's happening." These are the
approximate words he said.
He gave me the creeps. He would prot from repeated medical procedures which
would be of no use to my child; I had already done the research. He was corrupt. I
accused him on the spot of seeking prot as his rst motive. In front of everyone
waiting for the elevator: doctors, nurses, my relatives.
He turned purple.
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We never went back to that guy again. I embarrassed myself, everyone around the
elevators, and him. I'm not proud of what I said, but am proud of what I did: I knew
repeat medical procedures were unnecessary and I also knew he had no business
talking about my child in public. I have learned since then to tone down my rhetoric
and to avoid conict in favor of action.
If I had it to do over again, I would only tell him I do not want to discuss my child's
private medical information in public. That would have served the function of
protecting my child. Also, I would have ignored his bad advice without raising his
blood pressure. I now try not to 'win' but to resolve conict. It took time for me to
learn that, and lots of trial and error.
I realized then, though, that as the parent of my children, I was in charge of protecting
them, and I did not matter at all, nor did it matter to me how embarrassing it was, I
was, or my language was. I was learning to become a better advocate: what it is that I
do is what matters. The social thing was never my strong point, but still, I do try. I'm
always learning, and continue to try to improve.
This answer follows: What was the turning point in the lives of various Quora users,
and how has it turned them into the person they are today?.
Jessica
Margolin, Last person standing from birth family, single
(divorced) mom of grown son.
(1) "Everything is interesting once you understand the question" - physics

professor who wrote one of my grad school recs in conversation (I switched to
Materials Science)
This is true. Not only does it mean it's criminally easy to get distracted, but also that if
you nd something dull, you need to understand the questions it hides within. This
has been a bane and a blessing.
(2) "Whoever told you life was fair? I didn't." - dad
My dad's response to my youthful exclamations of "That's not fair!" Challenging

assumptions = great parenting technique, and also a good thing to drum into a
teenage girl's head. Life still isn't fair, and that still makes me terribly angry at times -
though more often on others' behalf than my own -- but it also makes me feel deeply
grateful.
(3) "If ifs and buts were candy and nuts we'd all have fruitcake for Christmas." -
also dad
Aside from the fact he was raised Jewish, and really who wants fruitcake anyway, this
ridiculous, lighthearted saying ways his way of saying that there are no excuses. It
should be noted that his favorite saying was "There is no nish line" and that he
worked until he died.
Vinoth
Kumar, Software Engineer
Updated Dec 25, 2012
This one.
I think this image is very deep. I have shown this image to many of my friends and
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colleagues and I have sent them the link to the Wikipedia article(Pale Blue Dot )
describing this image.
Sadly, most of them don't take a minute to appreciate the beauty of it. They are like
"whatever; let's get back to what we are doing".
Karthik
Kannan, Passionate twentysomething busy having fun playing a
game called life.
Written Jan 8, 2013
Gamify your life.
This one insight changed a lot about the way I deal with life. We live in an era where
we are constantly bombarded with an immense amount of peer pressure and social
expectations. Its very easily to crumble under these expectations and a lot of
twentysomethings( and people of all ages) do.
We also live in an era where there are many proponents for the Gamication fad and
there have been many studies pointing out how gamication improves involvement
and how it can boost a user's engagement with the site or app.
But according to me, the one big thing that needs to be gamied in this super
saturated culture of ours is life in itself.
Though games are ultimately about winning or losing at least you dont break your
head over it(unless you're some manic Dota freak.)
Its also means knowing that no matter how much you fuck you, you can always press
'Restart' and start all over again.
Gamiying life is all about not taking it too seriously, to have as much as fun as
you can and just enjoy the journey.
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Its also about living life on the edge, about discovery, meeting new people and
always looking out for new challenges ahead.
To think this way when everyone else is busy being constantly grumpy and depressed
wasnt easy but I ultimately learnt to loosen myself up by constantly reminding myself
that life is a wonderful game(think Splice, Mario...) and though playing to win or lose
is the end result, the one who has the most fun playing has a high probability of
beating the baddie but if that doesnt happen you at least end up knowing you tried
with all you've got and trust me, that's a wonderful feeling.
Edik
Austin, Ordinary Guy.
Written Sep 27, 2014
You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any
direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU
are the one who'll decide where to go...
Dr. Seuss , Oh, The Places You'll Go!
Krishna
Iyer, Inspecting in, applying out
Written May 22, 2013
"Patience is greater than the ocean, a patient man eventually rules the world." Its a
rough translation of a kural from Thirukural. My Father often repeated it and this was
his unwavering favorite quote. As with many great quotes, this one has a great depth
in it, and has life greater than its simplistic understanding.
Debarghya
Das, works at Google Search
"The utility of money is a logarithmic function of it.

U_m = log(m)"
-Jon Kleinberg, Professor
When I thought about it, it changed the way I approach life and make my decisions.
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Pankaj
K, worked at Tech Mahindra Pvt Ltd.
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I remember a quote from the movie Rocky Balboa which gave me an insight into the
ups and downs of life and the spirit of ghting:
Rocky Balboa: Let me tell you something you already know. The world aint all
sunshine and rainbows. Its a very mean and nasty place, and it dont care how tough
you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.
You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it aint about how hard you are hit,
its about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward; how much you can take
and keep moving forward. Thats how winning is done! Now, if you know what youre
worth, then go out and get what youre worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits,
and not pointing ngers saying you aint where you wanna be because of him, or her,
or anybody. Cowards do that and that aint you. Youre better than that!
Here's the movie clip:
4.1k Views View Upvotes Answer requested by 1 person
Katie
Birtles, Traveller, Reader, Writer
Written Apr 7, 2016
That I can do things alone.
Growing up I carried the pretty common insecurities of a teenage girl that I usually
needed a friend to hold my hand everywhere I went and with everything I did.
Going shopping, going to class, going on excursions, eating out, going to the movies,
going to the doctors, going to parties... even going to the bathroom. Especially going
to the bathroom.
Over time, as I grew up and my ambitions soared, I realised that while I was always
waiting around for someone to accompany me, I was missing out on a lot of
opportunities.
It mainly started with travelling. I always had these crazy adventures planned but no
one to go with. Most of my friends preferred package-deal holidays designed around
sunbathing and cocktails (which I love too!), but I craved a little more adventure. Like
hiking a Togo mountain for seven hours to a secret, beautiful waterfall, then later
going to a party at the place of someone I barely knew, and dancing the night away
with complete strangers.
I realised that while I was still limited to (what was then) my current social circle, I
was never going to nd someone who wanted to accompany me to hike in Peru, or to
volunteer in Nepal, or to see festivals in India, or to party in hostels across Berlin.
So I took a deep breath, and did it alone.
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And I was completely okay. Thriving, even.
Fast forward to now and you can nd me going to parties alone, eating alone, even
living alone... I particularly feel empowered when I walk through a club alone to go to
the bathroom and am the only girl standing in line without a friend by her side.
I've grown from an insecure, self-conscious girl, to someone who actually craves and
relishes my time spent in solitude.
Sam
Olendi, Live high. Live mighty. Live righteously.
Written Dec 7, 2013
I was always in a hurry to live my life that I'd nd myself trying to do too many things
at one time: while studying Software Engineering, I was trying to learn photography,
lm techniques, Italian, motion graphics, the guitar, the piano...you get the picture.
I was scared of being left behind, or not being good enough at something. But I
realized this: Yes, life is short. But that doesn't mean you should always be in a rush to
get things done. Instead, slow down and enjoy the moment. Live life as it comes. Do
what you love, and do it in an orderly fashion (otherwise you're just going to burn out
without noticing it).
Rob
Rawson, Founder Sta.com
One day I realised that I actually DIDN'T want to succeed.
Instead I was just imagining being successful. Making money, having a great life ... it
felt amazing to imagine it. To fantasise about it. But I didn't actually want to take the
real actions that were necessary to make it happen. Imagining was easy, took little
eort, and it felt great. Actually taking action was much harder.
It was easily to live in a fantasy land, imagining that one day it would all happen. It
was very dierent to actually take all of the action steps to really make it happen. In
reality it can take way more (5-10 times more) eort, persistence and determination
than you ever imagined.
When I realised that I slowly (over years) became better at execution. Making it
happen, creating the dream into reality.
Tony
Nguyen, Freshman
The realization that you only get one shot at life. It's made me ponder how eeting life
is, and how so many people have missed out on experiencing SO many things, opting
instead to live a life based on everybody else's rules.
Realizing this you gain innite condence. Now, being happy is the only priority. You
either do something that makes you happy or work towards something that will lead
to happiness.
Toto
Arahato, retired scout, volunteer, media activist; author of 8 novels
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Written Nov 14, 2015
"Everybody is lonely."
I used to be a people-person. I joined parties, clubs, groups. I rejoice every

conversation. Regardless young or old, male of female, a CEO or security guard those
people are, I found that every person is lonely, that to nd somebody who is willing to
listen is a hard case.
This insight changed me paradoxically in the way that I don't fear to be alone
anymore. Combating loneliness with craving for constant companions is restless, a
hunger that can never been satised. So I learnt to be the friend of my own. I am my
own companion.
Going solo, travelling solo, living solo are not scary. It's liberating instead. If in the
way I meet a companion, I welcome him/her. And if we have to part, I bow down and
walk away; I just make sure he/she doesn't regret our togetherness, no hard feeling.
Doug
Armey, Writer, Entrepreneur, Investor and Restless Adventurer
Written May 3, 2016
A good friend, in the prime of life, suddenly contracted cancer and died. Hed made a
ton of money, retired and lived in the mountains in his dream home.
I thought, Holy smoke! Where did that come from? And where did the time go?
A couple of years before another long time buddy died in similar circumstances.
Frankly, it left me feeling frustrated and saddened that life had gone by so fast.
Occasionally, I feel like Ive missed out on some of it that I can never get back.
Oh, Ive had a good run and Im not planning on ending anytime soon.
Ive built several businesses and a church. Attained nancial independence.

Achieved a third degree black belt in karate. Snow skied professionally. Earned a
pilots license. Won sailboat races. And traveled all over the world.
Through the years also Ive tried to be there for my family,spending time with and
providing for them.
Yet, honestly, Ive struggled with enjoying the journey of life along the way. And
feel sometimes Ive missed opportunities.
Im so goal focused I struggle to smell the owers along the way.
Occasionally I regret the wasted moments that could have been lived more fully.
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Ive decided for the rest of my life to focus more on enjoying the journey and less on
achieving another goal.
Earnest Hemingway wrote, It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the
journey that matters, in the end.
Ive discovered as we learn to enjoy the journey we uncover many treasures.
Spending time with the ones you love and being grateful for them.
Rejoicing in what you have already instead of focused only on what you
want.
Appreciating how the best of life often costs very little.
Watching a sunset burst into ame and a ower explode into bloom.
Feeling the soft rain caress your face and watching the clouds glide across the
heavens.
Sitting comfortably with a long time friend talking about life over a steaming
mug of coee.
Enjoying this experience, we call life, everyday instead of waiting for some
future time which frankly never arrives.
But how do we do this? How do we balance the demands of life with enjoying the
journey?
Frankly, its not easy. Thats why Ive struggled with it.
But Ill tell you what Ive learned.
First, make this a focus.
Its the only way to experience it. You have to remind yourself often.
Second, list out whats most important to you.
Review it often. Revise it as you go. This has helped me stay focused on what matters
in my life most so I dont get bogged down with the future.
Third, plan in times to enjoy the journey.
Every day talk with your loved ones. Every week do some things you enjoy. Take
vacations for concentrated times of fun and relaxation.
Fourth, learn to take advantage of unexpected opportunities.
A text from my son who wants to have lunch. A call from my daughter who just wants
to talk. Those magical interruptions which bring richness to life.
Fifth, look for the beauty around you.
A glorious sunset, a wild ocean, an intricate spider web, a new born puppy.
Sixth, be thankful every day for what you already have.
Your health, your family, your job, your home. Start your morning this way and it will
change your outlook for the day.
Life is short and goes by incredibly fast. I hope you enjoy the journey as Im learning
to.
What do you do that helps you enjoy the journey? Please share your thoughts.
Photo Credit: John Loo; Creative Commons

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Matthew
Dotson, multi-instrumentalist and music producer of edgy,
hard rock
In the past year I've had many insights that have changed the way I perceive the
world:
There is not one reality.

Reality is completely subjective to each person. One event could happen, and 100
dierent people would experience their own reality of what happened.
Form Follow Function. NOT the reverse

When a properly designed product, plant, animal, organism, etc works, it's because
the shape it takes is based ENTIRELY upon the functions needed for that organism to
properly function, or live.
Design that's based on form rst, and then function is inecient and backwards.
Adverting Makes Up A Lot of Our Lives:

How much of our daily lives is advertising? Isn't it gross?
Being In Nature Is Sublime:

Observing the design of thousands of insects, plants and animals is awe-inspiring.
The beautifully intricate designs on a leaf, pinecone, ower, etc. is visual poetry. I'm
still awe-inspired thinking about design in nature and how perfect it tis.
Emotion is a Muscle Memory. Break the habit:

Nobody can make us feel upset, anxious or happy except ourselves. We cannot change
outside circumstances, but we can change our reaction to them. This is done by
keeping a consistent breathing pattern and observing rather than reacting to your
thoughts. When this happens, your thoughts naturally slow and you reach
equanimity.
Life Is Intelligence and Consciousness:

I'm starting to getting into some mysticism here, but I honestly believe that life,
consciousness and intelligence are all the same thing. Life is so deeply incredible and
special.
Consciousness is a gift:
Think about the fact that you are reading this sentence right now. Does that not blow
your mind?
You are aware. Right now.
You are alive. Right now.
You are not new:

Just because you're a 24 year old male doesn't mean you're young. The universe has
been around billions of years. Do you think that you are young? You're an old soul.
The matter and energy you're made from has been here a verrry long time.
We Work Silly Jobs So We Can Eat, And Then Check Our Emails While Eating:
Be mindful. Enjoy your food. It's why you work.
Language Was An Invention. Not A Discovery:

Language didn't grow from the ground. It was invented by humans.
When you read an instruction manual you are reading compressed data. Thoughts,
understanding, skills are being put into ink and then rearranged on paper. And yet we
can understand it. Fascinating!
Humans Are Intuitive Beings: Internet

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Our bodies transmit and receive messages from other people regardless of
communication or distance. It happens all the time, yet we tune it out like we tune
out gravity.
Are you aware of gravity on you right now? You should be, because it is.
Most of us are just not in tune with it. Once you become more aware, you'll notice
more coincidences and instances where you and your friend will share the same
thoughts without speaking. It sounds hokey, but humans are fascinating and are
capable of transmitting messages to each other.
Sheetal
Sagar, carefully careless
That being judgemental is one of the most obnoxious traits one can have in
oneself, at least for me.
I have tried to recall a lot of incidents which are in one way or other, manifestations of
some social stigma which is prevalent in the world and concluded that most of them
are byproducts of our prejudices and then subsequent interpretations.
You found someones clothing provocative (perverts may not even need that though)
and you sexually assaulted, or a lot worse, raped her.You judged her by her clothes.
You found someone with a dierent sexual orientation than what is perceived to be
normal and you outright claimed that the behavior is somehow inuenced by some
ideas oating around and cant be present since birth. In fact, you also raised your
voice a step higher and strived not to grant any single individual with an unusual
sexual orientation any right of such sort. You judged a person to be wrong or
unscrupulous by his one personal choice.
The man you just saw is physically handicapped in some way and the seemingly nice
part of you decided to pity on him. You judged a person by a physical deformity.
May be he just doesnt need it and wants you to act normal.
You have already concluded that sex before marriage is nefarious in some ways or
according to your religion may be, and now any person you meet who has ever done
that instantly gets the taste of your disrespectul and a completely douche side. You
judged a person by a personal choice he/she made.
You just broke into someones private life, in fact tried to manipulate it by coercion.
I had been a judgemental, disapproving and an overcritical person for so many years,
in fact most of my childhood. I used to be an anti-social geek in school. I could never
get out of those nerdy books and get the right education. And then, I read things. I
experienced life closely, then questioned my convictions. I challenged all my beliefs
which the society had imposed on me, not by coercion but by imparting wrong
information.
I learnt it and I wish everybody could learn this and make the world a more open and
welcoming place.
There is just one thumb rule I believe in.

Dont ever judge a person on his/her personal decisions unless he/she hurting
anyone intentionally. You have no right to do that whatsoever.
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Ned
Nadima, Co-founder at Namobrain
Written Jan 25
Everybody is trying to gure their shit out.
When I was younger, I thought being an adult meant being wiser, smarter and in
control of life. As a kid, your parent makes almost every major decision for you, at
least, it felt like it for me (i.e: Mom - lets move to Canada. Me - Okay).
As you grow up, you realized that everybody is trying to gure their shit out. You will
become less impressed by people and gain more condence in yourself. This simple
insight will help you to trust your own intuition and take more chances in life. It
might also change your life in the process. It gave me condence to learn computer
programming while being a business student, launched Namobrain while doing my
masters studies and learn new languages for the thrill of becoming more awesome.
People will think youre lost or crazy, do not care about what they think, just do you.
Ill leave you with this quote from Mike Tyson:
Im trying to gure things out in the world. No one knows what this life thing is all
about, theres no manual. Just trying to gure it out.
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Surabhi
Bhatnagar, Furiously curious.
Recently, I was at a crossroads in time, taking too long to come to a decision, when
someone I respect said this to me:
"There are no right or wrong choices. You make a choice and you make it right."
It couldn't have been more timely. It shook me up, overhauled my perception and I'm
sure it will go a long way in shaping who I become.
Lukas
Schwekendiek, Been studying Fortune 500 CEOs every day for
the past 3 years
Written Jan 4
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The rain was pouring down ferociously outside. I was sitting in my Appartement at
the time in utter sorrow and disbelief that I could ever become this unhappy.
It was the single worst moment of my life. At that point in time I thought there was
absolutely no one in my life and that there was absolutely nothing that I had done
with my life until that point. It felt like I had wasted my entire life away.
After four hours of crying and experiencing a near panic attack I knew that I could not
keep going this way.
I had to end this rock-bottom moment somehow.
I went over to the kitchen, and grabbed the sharpest knife I had
As I stood there I thought about whether or not I should actually be doing this. But
as I saw it I only had two options. Going through with it, or changing my entire life
completely around I just had absolutely no idea how to do that.
It took me a good ten minutes before I dropped the knife. I couldnt muster up the
courage to do it.
The only other option left for me was to change my life. And I had no idea how.
What followed was an unbelievable journey of personal development, self-

improvement, love, joy and the craziest opportunities I could have ever wished for.
Over the next years I took life in my own hands, started to become the person I always
wanted to be and went out of my way to make sure I would never reach that spot
again.
I felt like I had been searching for the place I belonged all my life, only to nd it after
the worst moment of my life.
I cannot name the exact moment I received this insight, but what I learned over all
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this time, because I lived it, was simply this:
No matter how horrible things are, no matter how bad things may seem, you,
and you alone, have the power to change your entire life into whatever you want.
You only have to be brave enough to go for it.
This is your responsibility.
I was not brave enough to take responsibility for my life, and it lead me to almost kill
myself because of it. But I was too scared for that too.
You do not have to go that deep. You can take your life into your own two hands and
change it today.
2017 is the perfect opportunity for you to take responsibility for the way your life is
right now and change it into whatever you want it to be!
We all make dozens of choices every day that aect our lives from top to bottom.
Everyone of these choices brings a consequence with it that has lead you to this very
life that you are living right now.
You could have chosen a million dierent paths to take but you decided on this one,
and because of it you are where you are today.
Every single relationship you ever had, every skill you ever learned, every situation
you enjoyed and every unforgettable moment was because you made the decision to
get it!
This life is due to you!! This is your achievement!
Now I know that there are a lot of you out there who do not believe your life is an
achievement. This next part is for all of you.
It is your responsibility to decide whatever happens with your life. No one else has the
power to make the choices for you!
Sure, people tell you what you should do all the time, and people made you do things
you didnt want to and you have certain genetics and a certain upbringing that
aected you but that doesnt mean jacksh*t anymore.
Look, no matter what happened in your life, no matter how bad things were, it does
not aect your choice right now!
Right now you can decide to go against all your upbringing, to take life into your own
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two hands and to decide what you want to do from the bottom of your heart! You do
not have to follow anyone, or do anything you do not want to do.
At the end of your life, it is you who has to look back on it all and be okay with
the way things turned out. No matter how many people tell you to do something
and no matter how many of them you please, they will not be able to take your place.
How long are you going to keep waiting for your life to change?
I realized I had to change my life at that moment, and in the years following it I had
more fun, worked harder and experienced more breath-taking moments than the rest
of my life put together.
If you are not getting the life you want, then know it is you who got here and it is you
who is not creating the life you want for yourself. But also know that it is you who can
change it all with a simple choice, right here, right now, to make your life amazing no
matter the cost.
Do not let this year another year you lay to waste by waiting for things to change,
and instead take it into your own two hands and make your life what you want it
to be!
Know that you do not have to go through this journey alone. As soon as I came up from
my rock-bottom I needed help, advice and guidance, and that has made all the
dierence. Without my coach I would never be here right now, and I want to oer you the
same. If you are ready to make something of yourself and if you are sick and tired of
waiting, then sign up for a time here and lets talk about how we can make your life
exactly what you want it to be. Sign up Today to get your Personal Consultation Call -
Lukas Schwekendiek
4.2k Views View Upvotes Answer requested by Amit Patil and Brian Brave
Michael
Cardinal, Man for All Seasons
Written Jun 22, 2011
For me personally it has been several things: the most important people in your life
are those who love you for who you are so be yourself at all times, respect others and
believe you will get out in equal measure to what you put into life.
At all times I try to "be" according to my nature. I am who I am. Whatever power you
believe in has made you that way for whatever reason (which you may never fathom).
Do not try to ght it. Do not try to be someone or something you are not. I encounter
so many people who struggle in life because they are constantly trying so hard to be
someone they are not, and it never works. Some people will love you for who you are
(keep those people close) and some will hate you or want you to be someone or
something other than your nature (respect those for their opinions). I had to learn the
hard way that if I wanted respect and love I rst had to respect and love others. Yes
the Golden Rule really does work (Do unto others).
Aesop told a great fable around this idea: The Scorpion and The Frog
http://www.aesopfables.com/cgi/a...
A great source of inspiration for me have been the writings of Robert Fulghum
(Everything I Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten)
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Check out his wisdom here:
http://www.kalimunro.com/learned...
Michele
Woodward, Top Executive Coach, Fmr White House ocial,
writer
Written Mon
Back in 2005, I was in a small group training led by Martha Beck in Arizona. She
was leading us through The Work of Byron Katie , where a troubling thought is
examined and shifted through inquiry. This was all new to me and I was highly
skeptical.
My troubling thought - one Ive come to learn many people share - was, I have to take
care of everything or its all going to fall apart.
I was asked, Is that true?
Hell, yes, it certainly was true. It was the backbone of how Id organized my entire,
over-compensating life.
Can you absolutely know its true?
I began to waver.
What happens when you believe the thought?
Well, I run around like a chicken with my head cut o and feel like theres always
something left undone and Im exhausted and no one ever helps and, gosh, this life
sucks.
Who would you be without this thought?
I would be free. And relaxed. And happy.
Huh. How about that.
The nal part of the process is crafting a turnaround - a replacement thought thats
equally as valid. You do this by shifting pronouns and verbs and tenses. And mine
was/is: I have to fall apart so other people have the opportunity to take care of
things. In other words, when I step back from being hypercompetent, it allows other
people to join me in a reciprocal taking-care relationship. Which certainly feels so
much better. And this stance has utterly changed the trajectory of my life.
Anonymous
That it is unwise to tell certain things to certain people, even if they are
completely true.
Before I realized this I did a lot of embarrassing things.

Freshman year I ordered the people I knew based on how much I liked them.
I then showed the list to all my friends and acquaintances, including the guy
who was last on the list.
Some time after that I told a group of girls that I did not t in with them and
enumerated the reasons why. Awkwardness ensued.
I told my boyfriend at the time that he was the least intelligent out of all my
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friends. He seemed unfazed at the time but I believe he was deeply hurt.
Learning about tact was a dicult process. I'm usually very open about my thoughts
and feelings, but this meant I had to keep a lot of stu private, even things that were
important to me. I was unaccustomed to this and it was a very lonely experience. But
in the end I think it was worthwhile and has made people happier with me.
Les
Matheson, If you can't dance, at least tap your toe.
I spent many years trying to understand the answer to "who am I?"
Eventually I recognized that I had been making a fundamental error -- thinking that I
was looking for some xed and denite identity: something with a boundary that I
could grasp and say "yes, that's me. And that other stu over there is not me."
It turns out that's not how things work. It's impossible to t true self inside a
boundary, you can't say "it's this but it's not that" without distorting it. To try to form
a concept of self is like trying to grasp the edges of the sky -- there are no edges, so it's
very frustrating until you realize that.
This might seem like a small bit of clarication, but it has nearly innite
implications: all the time and energy I had poured into "putting myself together" and
self-improving was essentially wasted, because you can't improve something that's
absolute... something that is beyond comparison or concept. All the anxieties and
struggles about whether or not I was sucient and "good enough" were wasted as
well.
So that tiny insight tends to free up a lot of resources and energy: one needn't spend
so much of life trying to become OK or trying to ensure personal security or trying to
make up for the past, because those goals are driven by a mistaken understanding of
self. There's nothing to do: being is unconditional. It doesn't depend on any of that.
Anyway. A small thing with vast consequences, that's how I see it. To slip that in
ones' pocket opens a lot of doors.
Aarush
Nandal, Don't regret anything, because at once it was exactly
what you wanted.
Written Jan 9, 2014
Through out my life, I have learned many lessons that changed the way i have live.
Two years ago it was all normal. Enjoying Friday night with friends, Girls, Studying at
exam nights etc .Enjoy that was the motto of my life. I was the guy who love to make
jokes on Class toppers, Guys who work-out at gym. Then someday on twitter i found
this.
One life One body make both amazing

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I saved the picture. In the night at bed i started to think what the hell was i'am doing
with my life ?
I got no answer from my-self. I was living a life without motive. From next day i
started to work out. 1 hour at library. In starting it was quite tough after 1 month i got
the result. My grades was improved, Weight loss. I was on the right path.
In picture above the Guy is Lazer Angelov. I hate training, i hate workout. But i know
if i quit i will get back to old me. i don't want my old life. So it's very simple no matter
how big the problem is don't quite. One more year of hard work and my life will be
dierent.
This is the quote which inspire me every time at workout. 10 reps no give your best
make it 12. If it's 12 make it 15. Suer now. And live your life as a champion.

Nidhi
Mishra, The only disappointment in life is that it is too short to
learnAsk or Search Quora
everything. Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
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And, so i stopped staying at a place :)

Michael
Merrill, Sometimes you win and sometimes you learn - I enjoy
both!
Not sure this most changed my life, but it did have the biggest impact on my career
which has led to a signicant change in my life. - if nothing else you can skip below
for my ri on The Little Mermaid Song Kiss the Girl!
Ready for it? PEOPLE DONT READ MINDS. Blown away, huh?
NEVER ASSUME THEY KNOW
Let me explain.
When I rst started my career I was in a temporary position. I worked there for a year
and went above and beyond (in my eyes, anyway) in hopes of earning a permanent
position. One example of this was my own initiative to come in close to midnight and
work for a few hours to address questions from overseas territories in order to reduce
the back-and-forth related to time zones dierences. This enabled us to slice days o
our tight timeframes. Nobody asked me to do this. It was a solution I developed to
meet our deadlines.
During this time period I recommended a friend, who was hired (as a temp) under the
same group. Within a few months he was moved into a permanent position while I
was overlooked. What the heck?!
A co-worker told me about a permanent position at a dierent company. Frustrated, I

applied, and was hired. YAY!
But here is the valuable lesson I learned I had an exit interview with the head of the
department. During this conversation I shared that I had really wanted to join the
team, but was seeking something permanent. His answerI didnt know you wanted
a permanent gig. Wait! What?! I worked hard and went above and beyond. It was
obvious, but not to him. Not until I told him. We cant assume someone else knows
our aspirations and intentions. In fact, here are three things that might have sent him
a dierent message.
1. I was fresh out of lm school and pursuing that as a career. So why would I
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want a permanent oce gig that distracts from that?
2. My boss and the head of the department did not get along very well and that
limited how much my boss and he talked in general, let alone about my
aspirations and my extra, late night work.
3. There were loads of other temps, and the ones who expressed interest in
permanent positions were moved to the front of the line because they asked
for it.
This lesson is one of the best Ive learned. In fact, I later returned to this company and
worked for that particular boss to great success, with signicant career advancement
and nancial gain. As one of my career sponsors, we both beneted greatly from our
relationship.
So, does your boss know what your aspirations are? If not, set aside some time
for the conversation. This is the greatest accelerator to your career velocity.
Alignment around where you want to go and clarity on if you will be able to get there
together!
There are 2 reasons why we dont make our intentions clear
1 Its Obvious, Isnt It?
We assume we dont have to (that blasted common sense trap again). We think to
ourselves, Who in their right mind would think that I just want to sit in this position
my entire life? The problem is that most people are too busy thinking about
themselves and their own priorities that they havent taken on the bandwidth to
consider your own desires and needs. Although we frequently put blame on the party
who didnt see this, the only way you actually move toward a resolution is to go in
with this awareness and make it known.
2 What If They Say No?
The second reason we dont make our intentions clear is that we are afraid the answer
will not be what we want to hear
If you have a crush on someone, then tell him or her. Better to have tried than to live
in regret. Instead, we all want the kiss without having to put in the eort fear takes
over. Easier said than done. Trust me I know. I once had an elaborate plan to ask a girl
if I could kiss her at the drive-in. I had planned to save myself from shame by having a
small happy meal toy that Id claim I was actually talking to, in the case she said no.
Huh? Dont w... (more)
Rodney
Rumford, co founder of SlimSurveys.com Product Manager
who built TweetPhoto to 40 Million users.
Written Jan 3, 2013
If you help enough people get what they want... Then you will get what you want. This
applies to business, friends and strangers. Universal truth.
Sapana
Gathani, Live and let live
Written Jun 1, 2016
You should fail.

When I was a kid and all through college, my parents never fussed about my grades.
The morning of my exams, dad used to say to a nervous me - Whats the worst that can
happen? Youll fail? You should fail.
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To someone who had never failed an exam, this annoyed me. Id think Why wouldnt
dad tell me to succeed, isnt that what he should be teaching me?
Fast forward to now, working in the real world has made me realize - To succeed, you
have to fail rst, because failure teaches you where you are lacking, and that helps you
succeed.
Thanks Dad, you were right.

Kirti
Chitnis, CoFounder @ digmybrand.com
Written Jan 7, 2013
This story that oats around on the internet. I wish I knew who came up with it:
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty jar. And
proceeded to ll it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They
agreed that it was.
So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He
shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He
then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the
sand lled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous
Yes.
The professor then produced two cups of coee from under the table and poured the
entire contents into the jar, eectively lling the space between the grains of sand.
The students laughed.
Now, said the professor, as the laughter subsided, I want you to recognize that this jar
represents your life. The golf balls are the important things your family, your
children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions things that if
everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The
pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. The
sand is everything else the small stu. If you put the sand into the jar rst, there is
no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stu, you will never have room for
the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to
your happiness. Play with your kids, take time to get medical check ups, take your
partner out to dinner. There will always be time to clean the house and x the
disposal. Take care of the golf balls rst the things that really matter. Set your
priorities. The rest is just sand.
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coee represented. The
professor smiled, Im glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full
your life may seem, theres always room for a couple of cups of coee with a friend.

Ask or Search
Donna
Lail, Quorafor over 50 years
Living large
Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
There are things in life that are unfair and it is an absolute waste of time to gure out
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what those are and how they impact you. It is far better to capitalize on one's
strengths and focus on those attributes which give you an advantage. You cannot
correct those who will try to use your disadvantages against you, write them o. The
only person you can change is yourself. Go forth and conquer.
Ashwin
Thirumala
Kumara, Observer
I wondered about what the decisive advantage was that humans had over other
animals in the evolutionary trek, and realized that it was the ability to think about
their own thoughts. But how often do I use the ability?
Mike
Schoultz, Always listening, observing and learning.
Updated Dec 15
There are more than one for sure. Here are a few that come to my mind immediately:
Be a change agent
I am a big believer in adaptation and change. You should always seek to be exible
and keep several alternative paths in front of you. Always be on the lookout for ways
to reinvent ways for self-improvement. Our most favored quote on change and
adaptation is from Charles Darwin:
It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent, but the one
most responsive to change.
Learn kindness
All of the lessons on success get better when you have a strong foundation in knowing
how to stay happy. One big part of being successful in happiness is learning how to
share kindness. It costs you nothing and youd be surprised how much in can do for
your own happiness.
Listening
It doesnt seem like a lesson that should be in the top ten to most of the younger
generation, or that dicult to be an eective listener. But most of us are wrong on
both counts. Everyone needs to make listening their #1 core competency.
Wear your enthusiasm and passion
All of us can be enthusiastic and show passion on our favorite topics and on our best
days. The secret sauce is to be as consistent as possible and make it contagious to
friends and teammates.
Here is a favorite of mine: 10 Extraordinary Ways for Learning to Learn
Mike Schoultz is the founder of Digital Spark Marketing , a digital marketing and
customer service agency. With 40 years of business experience, he writes about topics
that relate to improving the performance of business. Go to Amazon to obtain a copy of
his latest book, Exploring New Age Marketing . It focuses on using the best examples
to teach new age marketing lots to learn. Find them on G+ , Twitter , and
LinkedIn
Shulamit
Widawsky, I've been living for overInternet
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half a century.
Updated Feb 17, 2013
To accomplish great things, one must risk looking foolish. Corollary: Talent and
skills are useless unless applied.
8th grade audition for the school musical. I had the best voice in my grade. The
director asked me to sing louder, three times. I was embarrassed. Family had given
me grief about being too loud. I could boom that beautiful voice for the director, but I
didn't.
Director at out begged me to sing my loudest. He knew I had a beautiful voice, but he
also needed to know I would risk putting it all out there, and that I could take
direction. I still held back. I was afraid I would embarrass myself. In my mind I
thought, "He doesn't know what he's asking. He can hear me just ne, and he knows
what I can do. If I really sing my loudest, he'll cover his ears with his hands."
Next kid up, saw what happened to me. He sang his loudest. I wanted to cover my
ears.
That kid was given a lead part, I was given a chorus part.
School, relationships, careers, life..."potential" alone will not lead to success. To succeed
takes risk and hard work.
Richard
Muller, Prof Physics, UCBerkeley, author "Now-The Physics of Time"
(Norton, 2016)
Written Jun 8, 2016
In 7th grade (or was it 8th?) I rst really recognized the beauty of the ordinary. It was
the play Our Town by Thornton Wilder; I had been assigned to read it for school. In
that play, Emily dies, but is given the opportunity to return home, for one day. The
other dead strongly advise her not to go. When she insists, they tell her, they plead
with her, to just pick a random, ordinary day. But she doesn't take their advice. She
picks a special day, one of the happiest days in her life, her 12th birthday.
It was a mistake. She nds it was too much, too intense. Life was so beautiful, every
moment! Why didn't she savor it as it happened! She nds joy in the voice of her
mother, of her friends, in the beauty of her home. Filled with remorse at how little she
appreciated the beauty of the ordinary, she returns to the dead.
It was in reading that play, part of a school assignment, that I became aware of how
blessed I was; how wonderful life is, not in the great events or special moments, but
every moment, whether it is a moment of pleasure or pain.
I went to a movie and was entranced by the beauty of the images and their color. But
when I walked outside, I realized that the real world had as much beauty and color,
just in the middle of the Bronx, on an ordinary street.
When my children were born, I created a little ceremony that we still celebrate. Every
Good Friday (Ill explain why I chose that day in a moment) I notice little things,
maybe a table top, maybe a bird outside the window, maybe a pencil. Ill look at it and
enjoy its beauty. I brought my (then) young children into this ceremony, on Good
Friday pointing out how pretty the water was in their cups; how it shimmered and
how looking through it made funny images and how its surface uttered. I told them
that this was Good Fridays Magic. They too found the day special. Then a year later,
when they were enjoying the Good Friday Magic, my older daughter said to me,
Daddy things are more beautiful on Good Friday but isnt that only because
thats the day we notice them? I told her she was growing wise.
My younger daughter now lives away, but I know that on Good Friday Ill receive a text
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message, something about how pretty some ordinary object is on that day.
Why Good Friday? In Wagners opera Parsifal, the protagonist Parsifal is returning
home from the Holy Land when he notices how beautiful the world is. He asks his
squire why? Gurnemanz replies, That is Good Fridays magic, my lord. The music
from this part of the opera is often played as a separate piece, called The Good Friday
Spell or The Good Friday Magic. I listen to the opera every Good Friday.
When I pay attention to the ordinary, I feel a deep love of God. I feel blessed. The most
wonderful part: I can invoke this feeling at any time, any day, now, by simply noticing
the beauty of the ordinary.
Upvote 3.7k Downvote Comments 53+
Kavya
Bhat, experiences confusion with great clarity
Near my childhood home was a quaint little park. It had a large igloo shaped bird cage
with many beautiful birds in it. Too large to see at once.
Something to the eect of this:
My mother would take me there every evening. we'd walk there. I was all of three
years old and the walking tired me out but I braved it just to see the birds. when we'd
nally get to the park I'd run to the cage and walk around it observing each bird
carefully. I remember being very frustrated because what I really wanted was to see all
the birds at once. only I couldn't. There were just too many birds and the cage too big.
standing on one side meant I missed the birds on the other side. This was a cause of
great distress for me then. I'd eagerly wait for the day I would be able to see them all at
once, begging to go to the park everyday. Which led my parents to believe I loved
birds.
This went on for almost a year. My mother would ritualistically take her daughter who
'loved birds' to the park everyday and everyday I'd fail in my pursuit of seeing them all
at once.
Then one day we moved to a new place. Years passed. I grew up and conveniently
forgot all about the birds.
Until a few days ago.
We happened to visit my old home in Jodhpur. The place brought a lot of memories
back. Birds and all. I grew curious. Where they stillInternet
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there?
So I took a walk to the park with an odd excitement mingled with the nostalgia(?) of
my rst taste in self disappointment.
I got there.
And there it was. The grand aviary of my dreams. too large to see at once. which stood
2 feet tall (Heck, it barely made it to my waist) with all of four birds in it.
I could see them all. At once. Of course I could!
The moment struck me as very strange.
I was hit by an epiphany then. So, this was what I'd been doing wrong all my life.
Never revisiting my problems. Much like the baby elephant who grows in chains and
doesn't break free even when it has grown much stronger than them years later.
I never took into account that I have grown in strength and ability whereas the
problem has not at all increased in complexity.
Many times we don't take into consideration the fact that we, unlike situations are
ever growing. Mind, body and soul.
Everything you couldn't do at some point, maybe you can today.
That book you couldn't understand a few years ago, pick it up now. Maybe you can
today.
That exam you couldn't clear last year, attempt it again. Maybe you can today .
That extra mile you couldn't run a month ago, try again, maybe you can today.
That friend you couldn't forgive yesterday, consider again. Maybe you can today.
The fears you couldn't overcome moments ago
maybe you can,
Now.
Jamie
L
Moyer, Author of ImproveMyLifeThisYear.com - A 365-Day Plan
for a New You
"I am responsible for everything I say and do."
When we are growing up, we are told what to do by parents and teachers. At some
point, the sense that our life is directed by others becomes an unquestioned "truth." I
go to work at 9am because that's when my boss tells me too. I don't go over 60mph
because the police will give me a ticket. On and on and on.
Don't get me wrong, I am not saying rules are wrong. What it wrong is that we
eventually cede our agency to forces beyond our control. I can't do this. I must do
that.
You are completely in control of everything you say and do. No one can force you to
make a decision. People can thrust bad situations into your life. But you and you
alone have the power to choose how you will respond.
It's the most liberating thought of all, actually. I am free, not because of a government
or anyone else. I am free when I choose to be free. I am free when I claim total
ownership over my own decisions in life.
For more life advice, visit Improve My Life This Year
Jamie

Chris
Smitley, life experience
Ask or Search Quora junkie. Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
Updated Aug 8
When I was 8 years old my dad signed me up for teeball. Like most kids I wanted to
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make my dad proud and he seemed really excited about it so I signed up.
I didnt realize it then but sucking at anything really upset me. I was a straight-A
student. I was a pretty good kid according to my parents.
Then I struck out at bat. Huge blast to the ego.
I was so appalled I cried like a little baby all the way back to the dugout.
I was more so embarrassed that I was crying than actually striking out at that point.
But I couldnt control it.
That night my dad gave me a little pep talk and explained to me that I could
accomplish anything I put my mind to and that if I wanted to get good at something I
had to just go for it. Keep in mind this is a deaf guy.
I quote go for it because that night he wrote under the bill of my hat those exact
words. And he did the same thing every season until I decided to pursue other sports
years later.
Many years ago I was pretty down on my luck and things were not going that well.
I had no money. No job. Didnt even have a place to live.
But those words, especially in my darkest hours, have always echoed in my mind and
have given me the courage to push forward no matter how hard life got.
The single most important insight in my life was that pep talk my dad gave me and I
am reminded by that talk any time I think of those words
Go for it.
Anil
Chouhan, Lifelong experimenter
Written Mar 9, 2014
Asking One question always when making any decision in life!
'Am I acting out if Love of something or am I acting out of fear'
And these notions:

- one has to learn to earn their own living. A person who earns his bread by fair means
sleeps well
- that you can create (manifest) a beautiful life by power of intention and consistent
daily focused eort. There are no such thing as bad luck - its just an excuse
- whatever happens, happens for best and the Universe knows better than us what is
best for us
- love and commitment is about being there for others happiness and not about
possessing
- slow and steady does win the race
- honesty is indeed the best policy. If you have to lie to please anyone then maybe they
should not be in your life
Arpan
Saha, Quorruption is inevitable.
Being liked is overrated.
Not that I don't like being liked; of course, I do. But surviving life became a lot easier
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when I stopped treating it like a karma pageant with a constantly updated scorecard
oating atop my head. Moreover, doing away with the dangerously prevalent notion
that being liked is somehow the default state (and that anything less is tantamount to
a '_') has not only freed me up for activities more fullling than arse-kissing* but
also added more meaning to those little moments when someone does go out of his or
her way to show some love.
Bonus insight: Such moments come by more often than you think.
*In a gurative sense, that is. I lack experience in this regard but I hear literal arse-
kissing can be incredibly fun and fullling.
Anita
Sanz, psychologist
Updated Feb 6, 2013
I was 14 when I had this insight lying in a hospital bed: "We may not all be in the same
boat, but we sure as Hell are all in the same ocean."
I was born with these weird kneecaps that dislocated all the time, chipping pieces of
bone o the end of my femurs and generally creating havoc in my knee joints. Before
the miracle of arthroscopic surgery and the nal solution called a "lateral release", I
had surgeries once every other year where my doctor just cut my whole knee open to
remove the bone fragments. Sorry if this is getting too graphic. Basically it hurt like
nothing I'd ever experienced before, waking up from surgery in agonizing pain like
someone had just taken a sledgehammer to my knee.
In the hospital bed next to me was a girl my age, also suering, in a lot of pain. It
was at least another day before either of us was coherent enough to talk to each other.
When we did, we shared "what we were in here for." Me...good kid, straight-A student
getting "elective" surgery done at Christmas time so I'd have time to recover some
before school started up again. She could not have been more dierent from me if
she'd been born on Mars.
My roommate had been out partying with friends since school was out for winter
break, got drunk and lost in a snowstorm, ended up in an abandoned laundromat and
passed out sitting in a metal chair just inside the front door. It was Illinois in the
winter...no power because the storm knocked out the electricity. By the time she woke
up, she needed medical care for severe frostbite. She had literally frozen her ass o.
She thought this was pretty funny. I was horried.
I "got" how dierent we were. I would never live her life. She would never live mine.
But here we both were on Christmas, stuck in hospital beds next to each other, crying
and moaning in pain. What I really "got" was how we were more same than dierent,
more human than a stereotype, and more alike in our suering than in our stories.
That's when it hit me that although we were not in the same boat, we sure as Hell
were in the same ocean. And it was a big, and painful, and scary ocean. But we were in
it, somehow, together. I have never forgotten this.
Dima
Korolev, Principal Maintainer at C5T/Current (2014-present)
A lot of "human" traits are just weaknesses, that we, as a civilization, have to
outgrow in order to progress.
Important examples:
The habit of valuing being appreciated by others.
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The connection we subconsciously make between "likable" and "true".
The habit of thinking what the others believe we should think and doing
what others consider us having to do.
The inability to control our emotions and therefore the issue of implicitly
allowing others consciously and subconsciously manipulate us.
The concept that "helping people is a good thing" applied to the extreme,
where the exclusive activity that people to be helped are engaging in is to
keep asking for more help.
The notion of success and accomplishment as perceived by the others, not by

oneself.
Insight:
Living my own life for just a few moments is worth indenitely more than living the
way others expect me to for a lifetime.
Via: Dima Korolev's answer to What is the single insight that most changed your life?
Praveen
Kumar
Singh, trying to change course of my life
this statement change the way I see my life

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whatever happened was good

whatever is happening is good
whatever will happen will also be good
what have you parted with that makes you cry ?
what did you bring with you that you have lost ?
what did you create which is now destroyed ?
what you have taken, you have taken only from here.
what was given was given only from here.
what is yours today, was someone else's yesterday, will be someone else's tomorrow.
change is the law of the universe

Nicholas
William
Clark, Musician/Nerd
Updated Nov 26, 2013
After thinking about the question I decided to post a more personal insight in my
life...
Sex and Love are not the same thing. We are all Bisexual.
Before you jump down my throat let me explain. Sexual intercourse, and all that that
implies, is a function of reproduction. The reason we enjoy and seek out sex, was
originally to insure the success of the species. As we evolved we became aware that
sex was enjoyable, and easily accessible but, the fact remains that its sole purpose is
for procreation. That being said, all the things that feel good about sex are physical
stimulation. The reason you enjoy being touched in an intimate way is because it
causes a physiological response. Which is why you can masturbate. Or have more
than one sexual partner. Or one of either gender. Because it doesn't matter who is
doing the stimulating. If it feels good it feels good. The *ahem* somewhat crude
analogy I like to use at parties is if you are in a dark room, you can't see anything; and
someone is giving you oral, it feels good right? It doesn't matter who is doing it.
Physical stimulation does not require love.
Sexuality is a total misnomer. We shouldn't dene our relationships with sexual

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dened by love. Trust, respect,
friendship, admiration. I would like to consider someone I am in love with as my best
friend. All of these qualities have nothing to do with sex. You can love someone you
will never have sex with, and have sex with someone you will never love. I have
been in both scenarios and I'm sure many of you have. The fact that we even have
designations of straight, gay or bi are just delusions. The word "sexuality" is a
delusion. These denitions only cause us to become afraid, castigated into one group
or another when we are all in this together. Men in particular are afraid of their love
for another man because we have dened love/sex into this one size ts all scenario of
romanticized courtship which is damaging to our masculinity. A man should not be
afraid to tell his best friend he loves him because love does not mean sex, and neither
party should feel that way. In just the same way a man or a woman should be able to
have sex with a man or a woman and not fear that it means they must love them; that
they are now pigeon-holed to a "sexual identity". This is not to say that sex and love
must never coincide; just that they don't have to. I think of it as a Venn-diagram. Two
circles: sex and love. There is no male or female circle. There are just two, separate
circles, but there is a small overlap. In that overlap, there can be a truly successful,
healthy relationship, but, all variations can be true. You can love someone for what
they provide for you, in terms of a loving relationship, but seek out others for sexual
needs. The ideas of sex=love also damn this type of lifestyle. We equate sexual
happiness with emotional happiness so if we can't please our partner, then they won't
love us as much, and will seek "love" by "cheating". When someone cheats on you, you
feel it is a betrayal of your love. The reality is they are seeking sex most of the time.
We are not monogamously sexual creatures. If you're at a date with someone, whether
it be the rst date or the 1,000th, and the waiter/waitress walks up and they are very
cute, are you going to notice? Are you not, for a split second, going to let your mind
wander? Perhaps imagine what they look like naked? Unless your date happens to be
the most physically attractive person in the room the answer is usually yes. Is this
indelity? Most people would think so but how can it be? You don't know this person.
You don't trust them, or know their favorite musicians, or their dreams for the future.
You don't even know what they look like naked. You just imagined it. That's all. You
could even actually see what they look like naked, and then have sex with them, and
the truth is you wouldn't love this stranger. You might think you have feelings for
them, but this is chemical love. Serotonin and Dopamine and Adrenaline have all
been coursing through your veins and this rush of pleasurable sensations have very
obviously been caused by your sexual partner, so you make the association. It won't
last however, more than that night in most cases. Perhaps even within a few minutes
those feelings will fade. The next day will be business as usual and you will still love
the person who knows you intimately and that you trust...not the stranger you had
sex with. You can be sexually attracted to several people you see at the bar, even
acknowledge it, but still go home with the one you love because there is a distinction.
This realization has shaped my own life in so many ways, and shaped how I view the
world. It has at times made me cynical, because this idea is nigh impossible for many
people to accept...but not absolutely impossible.
Alex
Liang, naturally curious
Go after your passions 100% because the opportunities may never come again.
I was on the basketball team in high school. And I've regretted it ever since. Not
because I was on the team, but because I never gave it 100%. Instead of practicing
whenever I had the chance, I'd rather hang out with friends or even lounge back at the
house.
I'll never get the chance to play competitive basketball again. That fact never dawned
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on me until I left for college.
I kept asking myself "what if." What if I gave it everything I got? Would I have been
able to play at the college level?
Playing with the players at my college, I always felt like I could, but because I never
tried, I'll never know.
Go after your passions 100%. You might not succeed, but at least you'll be satised
you gave it everything you got.
Gordon
Gould, works at SmartyPants Vitamins
Written May 5, 2015
From a human-level POV where we deal with the struggles, defeats, and triumphs of
life, I found the maxim, "embrace the suck" to be particularly useful. While it sounds
pessimistic at rst, embracing the suck means recognizing that, as the buddha put it,
all life is suering. When you remember that, then you are free of the expectation
that there should be no pain. Once over that expectation, it creates the opportunity to
nd joy in the struggle.
That is not to say that embracing the suck should make you all Pollyanna-ish, but
rather that it can help you remember your purpose or drive or ambition in the midst
of suering. It can help you push thru the pain when trying to do something
something hard, whether that is a tough physical task or dealing with blows dealt to
you by life. For me, embracing the suck is the key attitude to adopt in the pursuit of
the happiness of excellence. Thanks to Mark Divine for introducing me to the idea /
applied philosophy.
From a more cosmic POV, I was blown away by the grandeur of the Hubble Space
Telescope's Deep Field and and Ultra Deep Field photos which show just how huge
our observable universe is. Truly, it is astounding when you pause to consider it.
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Also worth considering is the discovery of just how common planets are in our galaxy
(and presumably other galaxies too, thanks to Kepler Space Telescope's discovery of
myriad and plentiful exoplanets. I hope we nd life and I hope the pessimistic Great
Filter theorists are wrong about what might lay before us.
Vivian
Amis, Author of "I am" - The Key To Manifesting, "The Lotus" -
Realization of Oneness
Written Mar 9, 2016
A sentence in a book that I read said something like: All problems must be met
within you. That triggered a spiral downwards and I lost the ground under my feet. I
fell until I was lifted up not by doing anything on my part, but by grace. I understood
and saw the bigger picture which changed my life forever.
Alexandra
Nevin, Life Coach, Hypnotherapist, NLP practitioner, big
sister, diver, photographer, traveller.
Other people aren't thinking about you nearly as much as you are thinking about
them thinking about you.
The world truly is a mirror - whatever you are believing when you look in that mirror
is what you will see.
Compassion is much easier on the psyche than judgement.
Intuition is a powerful part of who you are and no matter how much you try to ignore
it, bury it or deny it, it never goes away and is usually right - so embrace it and use it.
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Anders
Andersen
Written Apr 2, 2016
There is absolutely no evidence to support my (previous) belief in God's

existence, and there is a lot of evidence that my (previous) religion is absolutely
wrong on many subjects.
Well I guess that's two insights right there...but I count them as one ;-)
Anders Andersen's answer to Do you remember when you realized your religion was a
lie?
Shawn
J
Mnyele, I was 20 years old 1 year ago
The movie "The Gambler". Or more specically the "Fuck you position" speech by
John Goodman who plays "Frank" in this movie. Here is the transcript:
Jim Bennett : I've been up two and a half million.
Frank : What you got on you?
Jim Bennett : Nothing.
Frank : What you put away?
Jim Bennett : Nothing.
Frank : You get up two and a half million dollars, any asshole in the world knows
what to do: you get a house with a 25 year roof, an indestructible Jap-economy
shitbox, you put the rest into the system at three to ve percent to pay your taxes and
that's your base, get me? That's your fortress of fucking solitude. That puts you, for
the rest of your life, at a level of fuck you. Somebody wants you to do something, fuck
you. Boss pisses you o, fuck you! Own your house. Have a couple bucks in the bank.
Don't drink. That's all I have to say to anybody on any social level. Did your
grandfather take risks?
Jim Bennett : Yes.
Frank : I guarantee he did it from a position of fuck you. A wise man's life is based
around fuck you. The United States of America is based on fuck you. You have a navy?
Greatest army in the history of mankind? Fuck you! Blow me. We'll fuck it up
ourselves.
You may have not realize it, but most of the people that are on top of their elds today,
they made it there from the Fuck You Position.
I am Mark Cuban. I have sold my rst company for 10 million dollars. I have achieved
my Fuck You position. I now have this idea to broadcast TV shows on the Internet
(crazy in 1990s). I sell it for 5.7 billion dollars. Fuck you and everybody else who thinks
its not that valuable. Fuck you.
I am Bill Gates. When my company, Microsoft IPO'd, I sold some of my shares for 1.6
million dollars (a lot of cash in 1996). I am now going to continue growing this
company until it becomes a leader in personal software worldwide even thou the big
guys on the block (I am looking at you IBM) think I am probably going in the wrong
direction. Fuck you.
I am Malala Yousafzai. I have been targeted by the Taliban due to supporting
education for girls in my country, Pakistan. Due to that, the world's attention is now
on me. Fuck you Taliban. I am now going to take this ght further. Fuck you, I am
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on the the same stu you shot me
for. Fuck you, I am gonna let my story be known everywhere until they make an Oscar
nominated movie about me. Fuck you, I have won the Nobel Peace prize and I won't
stop ghting for girls no matter what. Fuck you.
Now going to the villain side. I am Adolf Hitler. My nation fears and respects me. My
book on my political ideologies and the future of Germany has been bought by
millions of people. I have an army of more than 2 million soldiers at any given time
that will ght to the death for me... and of course my nation. Fuck you Jews I don't
like. Fuck you international boundaries. I am going to take it all. Fuck you.
I managed to nd a clip on Youtube. Here it is : The Gambler - Fuck You

Hari
Priya
Vs, Data Analyst
Written Oct 23
I was traveling from Delhi to Hyderabad to join my rst ever full time job next day. I
came from a life sciences background but had to accept an IT job as I had no choice
back then. I was least interested in joining it as I thought programming is not my cup
of tea. I was already making plans on quitting it soon and reasons I can tell my
parents and friends.
So in my ight, the lady sitting next to me started a conversation asking about me and
the rst thing that came out was how hesitant I was to join the job. She listened to my
story and then said, Dont let any opportunity go from your hand. Opportunities
knock the door only once and when they do, take it. Take any opportunity that
comes your way. If it is a good one, you will benet from it. If it is not, at least
you will learn that it was not a right way to do it. People say dont go for anything
if its not your passion. But sometimes we should try out things with an open
mind to see if they work out. Give your best. You always learn something new
from any opportunity.
We hear these things very often. But hearing it from someone at the right point of
your life is what makes the dierence.
This insight changed the way I made decisions later. Whenever I had to decide on any
career opportunity, if thats something that I have in my hands that time, I would just
take it. And every opportunity taught me a great lesson. I built my career on the skills
I learnt my rst job and it has been a wonderful ride so far.
Joe
McCracken, CEO - entrepreneur - solutions architect - adventurer -
father - advisor
"Secure your own mask before assisting others"
You may have heard this when you last ew on an airplane, but it is also a sage piece
of advice in your everyday life.
I often meet people, in their eagerness to be a good citizen, rush into a situation
where they cannot make a dierence other than show good intentions.
If you really want to do good for others and the community, educate yourself, get your
health in order and be nancially independent.
Your ability to help others will increase 10x when your coming from a position of
strength. To make a signicant impact in other peoples lives, its easier when you have
all the necessary tools at your disposal. Additionally, you are far less likely to be the
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recipient of others charity, which would not be what you expected.
If you really want to make a dierence, get your own life in order rst and lead by
example.
Tom
Kehoe, Firearms instructor, martial artist, bonsai-ka, longtime
journalist
Written Jul 3, 2016
Dont take things personally.
My martial arts teacher drilled this into me endlessly when I was a kid. We take things
personally because of our innate sense of self-importance. This requires us to be
constantly oended by the actions of others, and constantly defending our own
actions, which are often truly indefensible.
More than that: Self-importance prevents us from being able to say three very
important words: I was wrong.
The importance of this cannot be overstated.
Americans live in a culture that teaches them, from the earliest age, the importance of
being right. Being right is an essential part of our self-worth. Our families, churches
schools and associates reinforce and twist this. They foist on us nonsensical beliefs
and attitudes that poison us; and we hold on to them for dear life because, our sense
of self-importance wont let us disregard them.
Our membership in these groups requires us to maintain those nonsensical attitudes,

and we cant let go because they tricked us into believing that we were exceptionally
wise for swallowing the poison. We cant expel the poison because it would requires
us to accept that we were wrong.
But the truth is, were wrong all the time. All the time. In even the most basic
assumptions about life, love and God.
But theres no shame in that. The nature of our world is illusion. Its the work of a
lifetime to strip it away, layer by layer. We should rejoice when we realize we are
wrong, because it means another illusion has been stripped away and we are that
much closer to seeing the truth.
Sarah
Chang, work in progress
Written May 9, 2013
Those are the only eyes, teeth, (insert any other part of your body) you will ever
have.
And that is if everything goes well, as in you have no need for prosthetics or
transplants. Internet
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Take care of your body. Without your health, you have nothing.
Dan
Holliday, I read.
Written Dec 25, 2012 Upvoted by Jillian Ratli, Founder of Fear Monster
Obedience School
The only thing that matters is love.
For most of my life leading up to 2008 I was a pretty serious Republican. I accepted
the fact that I didn't agree with their stance on abortion, gays and drugs because I
thought they were right on more issues. For most of my life leading up to 2010 I was a
pretty patriotic guy. I believed in love of country, love of home, love of people and all
that. I thought the purpose of my life should be something great, dedicated to
bettering the world and all that. For most of my life leading up to 2012, I believed that
the rubric of my manliness was measured in terms of my career and how much
money I made.
For more than six years I've been in a relationship with a man I loved, but never knew
how much I loved. I got red a year ago and moved back to Cleveland with my
boyfriend. Along the way I got back into shape and rebuilt a relationship that I took
for granted and never realized how much I was neglecting. Now, so totally in love that
I cannot imagine life without him, I realize that none of that other bullshit matters
much.
One day, this nation that I love will fade into the ash-heap of history. Any love for it
will go with it. One day, this humanity that I love will not remain even as a memory,
of the memory of the rumor of who we once were. Even the stars themselves will
burn away and leave nothing behind. And far from this being a recipe for nihilism or
fatalism, It's made me realize that the most important thing is how I live my life for
those that I love because if nothing lasts for ever, then at least I have love right now
and can do good to those I see and can touch.
And so I realize that the only important thingsince all things will endis love and
giving and getting as much of it as possible. While I'm certainly not a hippie or some
rosy-eyed simpleton, I realizethrough only the longest journey of philosophical
circumlocutionthat this is the ultimate destination of our lives. I love Rick and I'd
burn the whole fucking country to the ground for him. Nothing matters at all beyond
that. I pity people who don't know that kind of love and dedication.
Yann
Girard, Entrepreneur | Author | Life | Blogger
Dont aspire. Just be it.
An aspiring writer will always be just an aspiring writer.
And act like an aspiring writer. And not like a real writer.
An aspiring entrepreneur will always be just an aspiring entrepreneur.
And act like an aspiring entrepreneur. And not like a real entrepreneur.
The same holds true for any aspiring anything.
Either you are or you arent. Theres no aspiring.
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And when you are, then youll also act like it.
Like a writer. Like an entrepreneur. Like a blogger. Or like an artist.
And then youll treat your work like it should be treated.
Like the work of a real professional.
And not like the work from someone who might maybe some time in the future
become something.
Heres the truth..
No one is going to read a piece from an aspiring writer.
Or buy a book from an aspiring writer.
Or buy art from an aspiring artist.
No one is going to fund an aspiring entrepreneur.
No one is going to listen to an aspiring singer.
People want the real deal.
And the real deal starts in your head.
So you either take that decision right now, act like it and go all in on that or youll be
stuck at being an aspiring whatever for the rest of your life.
Look. It all starts with you.
If you dont believe in yourself, in your capabilities and that you are the real deal
(even if you arent yet) then no one else ever will..
Rashmi
Pathak, Sometimes you stumble upon gems
Updated Mar 11, 2016
Don't let behavior of others destroy your inner peace - Buddha
In the society where i came alot of us are taught that our worth is based on what
others think of us. You are the pride of your parents and family so anything coming
up against you is like a defame to the family. That is a very big burden to carry. So
here i talk my mind out to a nasty family memeber and she will gossip about me
everywhere and out ew my prestige straight from the rst window it say.
I think it depends a lot on the person also, how sensitive they are and how they take
such social obligations to heart.
Growing up and as a grown up I was always so worried about what others are thinking
of me. A harsh word or statement would hurt me like anything.
So obviously came a point where this nature was creating havoc on my mental health.
Sad and depressed one day i stumble upon this quote from the enlightened one -
'Don't let behavior of others destroy your inner peace', it was a turning point in my
life. It was as if I was carrying burden of the world on my shoulders and it magically
became lighter. It did start me out on a journey of realizing that its only me and only
me who is responsible and rather in control of my happiness, the power is inside me!
There are still many moments in a day when i nd myself drowing in the oceans of
self doubt and fear, but saying this quote aloud or in my head always helps me keep
aoat. It gets better with practice i promise because recently i have had episodes
where i was swimming through that ocean, actually enjoying the power and skill I
have unearthened as I accidently stumbled upon this quote. In a little way, the
enlightened one, enlightened my soul too. Internet
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Virali
Modi, Motivational Speaker
Written Jun 6, 2016
I never share stories of how my father has impacted my life, not because I dont have
any, but because Ive never found the right questions to write about them.
When I was ve or six months old, my dad had lost his job. We were staying in an
apartment in New Jersey. We didnt have money for rent, my necessities, or food for
my parents. It was an extremely dicult time lled with various challenges.
My dad started working as a chicken sandwich delivery man. Now some of you may
not understand this but my father (actually my whole family) was born into a
religious vegetarian family. In our family its considered a sin to even hold meat in
our hands. Of course that mentality has changed, but back in the 90s that thinking
was quite prominent.
From the tips hed earn, by dad would buy me powdered milk, because my mom
wasnt lactating as much due to stress. Honestly, he didnt earn many tips, hed earn
just enough to buy me milk. Unfortunately, the rent, my diapers, and food for my
parents was the issue.
Luckily there was an Indian store near our apartment. One day my dad wandered into
the store, he was really stressed out. The owner saw the concern and tiredness on his
face and expressed an interest in his problems. Upon hearing my dads troubles, they
made a deal run some errands for the owner, and hed give my dad money for his
work.
Thankfully, with the owners help, he was able to buy my diapers and food for the
both of them. It wasnt excellent food, it was white rice and yogurt. My parents lived
on rice and yogurt for the longest time. I cannot imagine how dicult it must have
been for them to eat the same thing daily. They couldnt eat breakfast or lunch due to
the limited amount of rice. They only ate one meal a day, and if they felt hungry
inbetween, theyd drink a couple of glasses of water to satisfy that hunger.
Upsettingly, another dilemma had come, my dad didnt have enough money for rent.
The apartment complex was talking about going to court to evict us from the
apartment if we didnt pay the rent (we were a couple of days late). We wouldve been
homeless, foodless, and jobless if it wasnt for that Indian store owner. Once he heard
the troubles we were facing, he gave us enough money to pay one months rent.
Fortunately by that time, my dad had landed a job in Tenessee and paid the owner
back from his rst paycheck.
Ive learned so much just from this story. It was denitely one of the most dicult
times in our lives, even if I may not remember it. I feel that I always carry a little bit of
him with me and that makes me proud.
Do what you need to do, especially if you know its right no matter how
wrong it may seem. - If my dad hadnt gone against his religion at that point
in time, I probably wouldnt be alive right now.
Always be thankful for everything in your life, no matter what. - I

imagine it would be extremely dicult to just eat rice and yogurt for the
longest time ever and still be okay with it. I know my dad was extremely
grateful for even just one grain of rice.
Be happy no matter your situatuon. - Sure, it may not sound as if they were
happy, and of course they couldnt be, but they made the best of what they
had. I know my parents and Im sure thats what they did.
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Be as honest as you can be. - My dad told the owner of that Indian store that
hell pay him back, even though the owner never expected it, but my dad
held stuck to his word and returned all of the money.
Never forget your past, no matter your current social status. - My dad
always leaves a good tip for waiters, cab drivers, delivery men/women, and
housekeeping whenever we avail one of their services. Hes always said, You
should never forget your past and what youve done to achieve your current
status. You should always treat people with compassion, no matter their
profession. They have problems in their lives as well, thats why they have to
work. It isnt easy serving people. You should always leave a good tip; who
knows, maybe your $5.00 will help feed a hungy stomach.
This answer wasnt easy to write but I know Id do it again, mainly because Im so
proud that hes my father and that Im his daughter. These lessons Ive learned from
his past is something that I carry with me all the time. Im a better person because of
his struggle and experiences. Ive learned to be compassionate, empathetic, honest,
and loyal. I carry a little bit of my father anywhere I go and I couldnt be more proud
of him.
11.2k Views View Upvotes Answer requested by Aarushi Mittal
Alexander
Freiherr, Prof. em. of Sociology
Written Jun 7, 2015
Most of our mothers (and Disney) told us something like:

to daughters:
Your prince is out there and if you gonna wait patiently enough, one day he
will come riding along on his grey horse and carry you o to the castle of
dreams.
to sons:
The right women is out there and is waiting only for you and you will nally
nd her and she will make you all happy.
But the earth doesn't revolve around us. The world and its inhabitant are not here
only to make us happy.
Maybe your prince or princess is out there and maybe he or she come one day but
mostly ... there is neither a prince nor a princess.
Don't expect someone else to be responsible for making you something.

Don't expect someone else to be responsible for feeling something.
Don't expect someone else to be responsible for being someone.
There are so many people unlucky married, because they don't understand this
simple truth:
Other people are not responsible for you, your luck or your feelings - only you
are - and nobody else.
You may have had some hard times in life; maybe abusive parents, no friends in school,
no luck in love or in the job. Most people have had hard times. But whatever happened
or is yet to come, never forget that you can steer your life and decide in which direction
you are going to sail. It is all up to you.
Learn to love yourself. Internet

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Forgive yourself for your failures.

Don't make others responsible for your own luck.
Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.
- Farrah Gray
Ravi
Tandon, Graduate Student
That it is in this moment lies your true power. The future & the past matter a lot to
each one of us. We plan for that lies ahead and we reect upon that has left us. And
yet, one of the most insightful things to realize in life is the power of the present; that
life is present in the present; that looking back or forward would not leave to success
until and unless you believe in the life that is present within you in the present
moment.
A large part of our lives are lead not in the present moment. We tend to lose out on
experiences of life since we are diverted towards what was or what might be and not
towards what actually is.
Look at the life around you, look at the world around you; the joy on the faces of
fellow humans, the joy within nature is there to enjoy; to celebrate the existence; the
power called life owing through each and every individual is right here right now.
The past has gone & the future is yet to come. The power is all vested within you.
One needs to realize that act upon the power keeping in mind and yet not over
emphasizing on what has gone by or has to come yet.
Love,live,cry,dream,aspire, inspire, realize the power of the moment and live in

an awakened state.
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Sunny
Mishra, (My friends say I radiate positive energy)
To start with let me rst tell something about myself. I am presently a nal year B-
Tech student and this one pic would have one of the most pro founding impact on
myself in the three and half years of my study at Haldia.
Other than the obvious transformation which was brought about by this picture and
the two movies, this transformation also gave me a lot of condence on myself and
helped me nurture the feeling that I can achieve whatever I want to.
It was my 4th semester and I had purchased my new laptop.And frankly speaking it
was like getting a free license to watch Hollywood movies.
(as I was not so comfortable at home watching Hollywood movies facing the scorn of
Parents).Here in the hostel I was free to watch any Hollywood movie.
Now one ne day one of my close friend (Gaurav) called me to watch a movie
named: THE MACHINIST.
During the movie we had the following conversation:

Gaurav: Identify this actor?
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Myself: Don't know.
Gaurav: Are you kidding this one is the same actor who acted in the movie:
BATMAN BEGINS.
Myself: What the f***. Are you serious ?
Gaurav: Yes I am.
I immediately went to my room and Google searched rst conrming the name of the
actor from the the movies THE DARK KNIGHT and THE MACHINIST.
The answer from my friend turned out to be true. Then I saw the release date of both
the movies and to my shock I found
Release date of THE MACHINIST : 18 JAN 2004.
Release date of BATMAN BEGINS: 10 JUNE 2005.
In short duration of one and half year Christian Bale incredibly gained from 55
kg to 83 kg .
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NOW WHY I WAS THRILLED ?

I looked the same as Christian Bale in the movie THE MACHINIST, the only little
dierence was My height being 5' 11 inches and weight nearly 60 kg.
And frankly at that time one could even compare me with the skinny Jewish survivors
of Holocaust.
I certainly realized that IF CHRISTIAN BALE CAN TRANSFORM HIS BODY SO

INCREDIBLY WHY CAN'T I ?
Then I started hitting a gym at our college campus, watched videos from
Huge Online Supplement Store & Fitness Community! downloaded the videos,
prepared my own food chart and started following a specic regimen being highly
motivated by Christian Bale.
I never used any supplement or drugs rather kept on eating generally available
protein rich foods and did exercises regularly.
And in a span of 8 months I was able to build up myself and gained nearly 10 kg. That
picture from the movie was actually the driving force for all the workouts that I did
and endless hours that I spent in Gym.
Now most of the T-Shirts which used to be too loose to t rmly stick to my body and
my arms. I really feel nice , motivated and condent about it.

Saumya
Shivhare, Insights :)
Ask
Written Julor
18,Search
2016 Quora Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
Book: I am Malala. Story of an average girl who spoke up for little girls like her, to go
to school, to study and was shot by Taliban rightInternet
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in her head.
I hope many of you already know about her from news. You even have read her book
already.
Apart from all the news part, the book has insights about Afghanistan, Swat valley,
creation of Pakistan, its dictators, politics, real life situations of Pashtuns, ordeals of
women, onset of terrorism and its eects on common people .
How it aected me?
I cannot stop thinking about the book. Each day I think about Pakistan and Taliban at
least once a day since weeks!
It showed me that a normal man/girl can stand up against the bad people and can
shake their worlds.
It acknowledged about millions of people who live in worst conditions one cannot
imagine. It brought me into a realm of unbearable truth.
In spite of all this, I only feel a lot motivated than I could ever be. I can now stand up
with truth without any scratch of fear in my heart.
"If I don't speak up, those false people will take away my existence, I have to
speak even if I'm threatened for life" Malala's father Zia Uddin always told her
that.
" The happiest picture would be of a child in her school uniform, smiling along
and going to her school in the morning"
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The power of small things isn't that small. I can now see absolute beauty in very small
things. I have become more observant, keen and concerned.
I am stronger than I could ever be. :)
Source Bing images

Gillian
O'meagher, works at Writers and Authors
Written Tue
I think nothing can compare to the insights you gain from death. Whether its close to
you, or someone you love, at certain points in life death will rearrange your emotions,
perspective, goals, and the way you experience the world.
My rst life-changing moment was when I was lying in the middle of the road after a
car accident. A drunk driver racing a friend had cleaned me up. I felt a sharp pain in
the front of my head when I hit the windscreen, and an almost instant pain in the
back of my head, which is apparently the brain bouncing against the front and back of
the skull.
I woke up on theorroad,
Ask and
Search saw my grandmother standing in the middle of the
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ickering in and out existence (she died when I was little). I thought, maybe Im
dying. I closed my eyes, and my memories ashedInternet
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through my head. But it was odd,
an out of order jumble, like a computer memory crashing, smells and sounds and
visuals mashed together in a random dump, years in seconds, a chaotic feednot like
in the movies at all!
Needless to say, it was the rst time I truly grasped that you just die. Youre not the
star of the show. It was chance whether I was going to die on that road, since I had no
idea of injuries etc. I think everyone has a moment like that where they realize they
are just one of billions on Earth and your narrative can juststop. No fanfare. I mean,
we all know that in a conceptual sense, but you only truly grasp it when youre lying
there, waiting to see if, in that moment, the world cuts to black, and your story (on
this side) is over.
The second time was when my dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor. I was going
away to live somewhere else, so I had to make a choice. I chose to stay. He was only
supposed to live a few months, but lasted over four years. After the rst year, his
sanity and control started to slip and it was like living in a nightmare. That experience
of approaching death heightened my awareness of the fragility of self. I kept a stanley
knife under my pillow and never slept for more than a few hours at a time, once the
paranoid psychosis had taken over and he rarely remembered who he was, or who we
were.
An extended experience of death like that, watching it take someones sanity rst,
making him crazed, violent, and confused, denitely gave me a lot of strange, intense
insights into the unpredictable nature of life, as an experience we think we can
control. And that when the spectre of death haunts your house, youre living in a
dierent country than the carefree souls down the street. You begin to understand
how the shadow of death changes a life experiencein myriad ways.
The third one was a close friend who was more like family, and a kindred spirit. I had
promised to move overseas not long after he did, so wed be in the same city, but I
became ill with an auto-immune disease. We would Skype and email and call, but as I
got sicker, I worried about him relying on me, and I also worried about being a burden
on him. He was becoming extremely successful, and I knew if he realized how ill I
was, he would y back to check on me. So I avoided Skyping, since I knew I wouldnt
be able to hide how ill I was if he saw me, despite knowing it left him feeling a little
oended.
I gured two things would happen: either I would get sicker and die, or I would get
better, and if so, then I would y and nd him, and apologize if his feelings were hurt
(hed assumed I was worried about visa costs, and suggested we get married as
friends, as he had a dual passport, to which Id said no, since obviously that wasnt the
reason for my hesitation) and we could nally have an amazing time in a new city. So
while we were still in contact I didnt make it a mostly daily thing, like it had been
beforein case he had to get used to life without me. Just as my health started to take
a turn for the better, he died suddenly.
The lesson death oered here was never assume who is going to go rst. It took me a
few years to accept that instead of me dying, which was something I had been trying
to prepare him for in my own way, he had suddenly disappeared from my life
permanently. The suddenness, the lack of preparation, was brutal.
That someone young and vibrant could suddenly be taken like that: nothing can ever
prepare you for the loss. But more than that was the thought I was supposed to be the
one at risk, not him. Here I had cultivated an illusion of control, in terms of loss.
Based on the information at hand, I had assumed I would probably die rst, and if
not, neither of us would for at least a few decades. But again, death had dierent
ideas.
So while these stories sound sad, and yes, there was a lot of tears and nightmares in
the mix, there has also been a lot of growth, maturity, and perspective gained from
these extremely painful and often terrifying moments.
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You learn to ignore the petty, to enjoy every beautiful moment, to be aware that life
truly can end for anyone, any second. To really laugh when experiencing joy; to savor
it. To know that health isnt a right, and is more often than not a random prize, that
should be celebrated for as long as its present.
I wrote novels and scripts and created beautiful art from fully processing these
dicult, complex times. I met amazing people, and discovered deeper levels of
friendships. I began to understand what I wanted from a mature relationship. I was
reminded that for each person lost, there is someone out there looking to nd you and
support you in a similarly loving way, and who you can denitely make laugh; who
will think that your company is one of the best things about being alive.
I learned to shrug o criticism. To recognize and dismiss jealousy. To pity those who
had health and opportunities but were still inherently dissatised. To admire those
who were quietly brave. To respect those who lived with empathy. To appreciate those
who handled supposed limitations with dignity, and still enjoyed their existence to
the fullest. To not be afraid of living passionately, and making mistakes, while
exploring this existence.
I began to understand that kindness is an incredibly precious thing and even a small
gesture can make an indelible impact. That the truly awful days wont last: youll
make it through them, and nd beautiful, better ones waiting just around the corner.
That the lessons learned and the insight gained from memories of conversations with
loved ones are an aspect of their legacy. That while death can be brutal and cruel, it is
part of something as precious as life for a reason.
Gabriele
Kembuan, Zenobiotic!
Written Aug 1, 2016
I met my last boyfriend when we were 17. We were so suited for each other that we
immediately hit it o. I didnt know anything about myself back then. I was an
ambitious, hot-headed, pragmatic girl, who was constantly dissatised with my life. I
was totally lost.
My boyfriend was a living breathing analysis machine. Scarily smart. Seemingly quiet
and intelligent, but beneath those he was much more- an iconoclast, philosopher,
idealist rebel. (Yasss, textbook INTP.)
It was maybe just three months into our relationship- we were inseparable, and had
amazing discussions 24/7. Ive never had such a mindfuck before. And it felt damn
good. And then he began playing some thought experiments on me.
What if I dont exist? How can you conrm that I exist?
What if we are just brains, suspended in test tubes, and all your experiences, including
me talking to you, are nothing but chemical reactions induced in your brain by some
aliens?
It was in the middle of an anatomy lecture and I felt like I just got punched in the gut,
and I just sat there dumbfoundedly.
Suddenly a passage from a Biology textbook ashed into my mind. You can give
electrical stimulation to people who are blind from birth through their tongues and
they can see things that resemble images. At the moment I read about it I thought,
hmm. Interesting. And moved on for my SAT prep.
We see with our brains.

We are nothing
Ask but tweakable
or Search machines.
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At that moment I felt like all my struggles before seem so very petty and meaningless,
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and it was as though the world revealed itself to be a giant Lego block that promptly
collapsed, its tiny pieces oating around the air as I came to the grand realization of
how basic, how beautiful, how ironic, how majestic the world is. Chaos. Order. Too
meaningful to comprehend. Too mechanical as to be with any meaning.
I began to look at things and stop taking things for granted.
Question everything. What is this?
Break it to their smallest, most fundamental pieces. What do you see?
Chaos - order -
Beauty.
Think..
At that moment the world took an entirely dierent color. Everything started to make
sense.
And then a long way has been paved from there. But for me, all started there.
Deborah
Elizabeth
Finn, I have been blocked from Quora.
Written Apr 2, 2016
The most important insight that I've ever had is that other people really exist, and are
the main characters in their own lives, and are not merely supporting characters in
my life.
I'm embarrassed about how long it took me to realize this. However, this is denitely
a case in which "better late than never" applies.
When I encounter people who do not seem to have had this realization, I often feel
angry at them, because they remind me of my own (highly embarrassing) narcissistic
tendencies. However, on further reection, I remember that I'm only guessing about
what is going on in their heads, and it's not my job to police them.
David
Payne, I'm married to the game
I allowed people around me to dictate my identity...
For the longest, I would wear XL graphic T's considering I was only 5'7 and 130
pounds in middle school, I'd wear my jeans below my butt, and I'd talk a certain way
once I got around black folks. I wanted to be accepted by other blacks, and I only
thought that doing so, I'd had to t a certain image in order to do so. Which at times,
was true...
And then... once I got around white folks, I'd pull my pants up, not use vernacular
English, and not sound too materialistic. For the most part, I was accepted by the
white kids at my high school. The feeling felt mutual, and I felt like my relationship
with the white kids at my school was genuine, and they accepted me for me. I didn't
have to be Jay-Z, DMX, or Lil Wayne, I could be me without any scrutiny.
Once I graduated high school, I felt the need, that I needed to getaway from niggas
and those niggas were other blacks who often despised me because I wanted to learn.
They despised me because I didn't want to get into ghts, or act like a tough-guy, and
I realized at a early age, that getting into ghts wasn't worth anything and sometimes
kids at my high school were getting stabbed and jumped over petty stu...
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I was in denial the rst couple of times, but my mom convinced me to apply to a
Historical Black College University. I didn't want to do it because my goal was to prove
to white people that not all blacks are thugs, gangstas, rappers, or athletes. I didn't
want to go to a predominantly black school, I didn't want more of what I experienced
in high school. I wanted to go to a predominantly white school like University of
Maryland, with the percentage of African Americans is less than 10 percent. That was
my mission, but once I got to Howard University, I was up for rude awakening.
This was really the rst time I saw, black medical doctors, lawyers, and black students
suiting up for business classes. My whole interpretation of what it meant to be black
in America was screwed up, and I was really ashamed and unforgiving of how I
allowed media and a couple of screwed up classmates to give me an image of what
being black should look like.
Howard is somewhere in the neighborhood of 70 percent black, but its not just black,
a lot of foreign blacks go there, Middle Eastern, Indian, and Whites go there. It's a very
diverse school despite what the naysayers might feel about black colleges.
After the rst semester or two, I no longer felt like I needed to ll a void, I was proud,
and I knew that I could be a part of a legacy at Howard U.
I'm black and I'm proud

Aadarsh
Jha, Life is this. I want THIS
Written Jul 18, 2016
A particular Incident
16-01-2014
Just another normal day. Less than 60 days to go for my CBSE 12th Board exams. I sat
for my morning study session as soon as i woke up. I was studying Economics that
day.
Father got a call from his superior to arrive at oce early. He dressed up and left
home. Everything was ne till then.
Fast Forward 4-5 hrs.

Father came home. He was unusually silent. He went straight to the washroom and
got freshen up , ate lunch and went to sleep. Mommy and me thought he must be
having some oce strees or he must've been given some extra work that's why he was
behaving that way.
He woke up in the evening and called me and mom in the room and said "I've been
red. They gave me absurd reasons and didn't even heard my side of argument.
They made me resign on the spot.Thats why boss called for oce early today. I
don't have a job now . I don't know what to do. "
I didn't say anything. Mom was telling my father to not worry and everything will be
alright.
My father worked in Sales deptt. Of Newspaper Company and used to get around
18-20k Rupees(around 250-300$) a month to feed our family of three. He was the
only breadwinner of our family. So my father losing his job was a big thing for our
family as we had to pay rent every month and there were many other miscellaneous
expenditures which suddenly had to be put on hold.
Luckily we had some past savings and the amountInternet

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which he got from provident fund
took us through some months & after 2.5 years of struggle my father nally has a
good satisfactory job which he enjoys doing so.
I think this particular incident changed me and my life and made me a better version
of my self.
I gained patience , realized the value of saving money , realized Life is not always
fair and everything happens for a reason.
That incident also somehow helped me perform better in my exams and i scored 93%
overall and 97/100 in Economics :D
Arko
Sen, Alive
Before understanding that nothing is real, one must realize that everything is real.
Once I realized it, I came to accept duality as an intrinsic property of everything, it

was a revelation that pretty much has shaped my worldview and attitude since then.
Kyle
Pennell, will never stop learning
Intentions matter
Once you start realizing goals, making dreams a reality, you realize that your
intentions do matter. Your thoughts, your plans, they matter...they do lead
somewhere. It takes a few successes to get some momentum, but once you gather
some, you realize that you need to keep dreaming, keep setting your sights on things
you want and value.

Bala
Senthil
Kumar, As required
Ask
Written or25,
Dec Search
Tough for me to choose one, but here are the frontrunners:

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- Develop, protect, nurture, feed, respect, and listen to your inner self.
If on a given morning, playing with the dog feels like the most wonderful thing to be
doing, do exactly that. The rest of the world can bloody well wait.
- Refuse to get into any race where the fun is not in the running.
The nal outcome of all our journeys is cessation, passing on, leaving the body -
whatever we may choose to call it. We're individually so insignicant and that is to be
enjoyed. Winning, losing, success, failure, all pale in comparison to simply LIVING.
If it isn't fun, what's the point?
- If you must do something stupid, at least make it fun for others!
The world tolerates a lot of bull, so if you think your bull is worth doing, please make
sure other people are at the very least, entertained by your attempts. If you're
actually up to something useful, then that's a bonus!
- No matter how high you feel, someone has experienced a bigger high. No matter
how low you feel, someone has experienced something much worse.
Luke
Mead, I've lived life and I've listened to smarter people's advice.
Written Jan 11
In 2013, my right testicle was amputated. I was 12 years old.
Testicular torsion, is when the testicle spins and the blood ow is cut o. In my case,
my testicle was 95% dead. I suered depression after losing my testicle. I felt like my
world had collapsed and my life was over.
I was ashamed.
However, I learnt more from that experience than anything in the world.
I learnt to value my life.
I may have lost my testicle, but I didnt lose my life.
I may have been embarrassed, but at least I have an excellent education.
I may have been ashamed, but at least I am born and raised in a developed country.
By appreciating life, its easier for me to be happy and enjoy my life.
-L Mead
Caleb
Spiro, Founder of CS Fitness
Written Dec 19
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For a long time in my life I thought I wouldnt amount to anything. After being
bullied for many years in middle and high school, I felt alone and worthless about my
own life. At one point, I even considered taking my life away.
Then came tness. It was in the gym where I felt better about who I was and who I
was becoming. Perhaps it was the physical sensation of endorphins running through
my body, but I know that it was something greater than just that. Beyond just a
runners high I felt a sense of accomplishment that I could do something in world
despite how the bullies made me feel. Although I had struggled greatly in making
tness a habit in my life, it was through the act of learning how to be consistent and
hardworking in the gym where I learned how to persevere beyond the pain in my own
life.
Two years later, I have transformed not just my body, but my mind to a stronger
version of who I have become. As tness has become an essential part of my own life,
it has pushed me to constantly strive for a greater version of myself. Without weight
lifting, I do not know where I would be today.
Grateful for how tness has changed my life, I decided not too long ago that I wanted
to share what I have learned throughout my own tness journey, both in terms of
tness tips but also hard lessons I have learned along the way, to those who are
looking for advice in achieving a greater self. From this, I decided to create my
YouTube channel http://tinyurl.com/h5vsmze in eorts to inspire others to read a
greater version of themselves.
Seeing how tness has become a part of my own life, it is my hope that it can become
a part of yours too.
I hope what I had to say will be helpful in some sort of way!
-Caleb Spiro
-Founder of CS Fitness
Nick
Jordan, Serial Opiner
99% of stu isn't worth stressing about. I'm talking about serious stress. Plenty of
things happen on a day to day basis that might upset you or that you disagree with,
and it is ne to have a reaction to those events. In the long run however almost none
of them will have a meaningful impact on your life. As a rule of thumb I ask myself if
I will be thinking about a particular even in six month. The answer is almost
invariably no, and those are the things I don't let impact me past a few eeting
seconds.
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Heath
Uhrenholdt, Engineer
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Written Apr 4, 2013
The insight that most changed my life was, "You are only a victim of the world, the
environment, and of society for as long as you allow yourself to be. The more you
think of yourself as a victim, the more you become a victim of your own making. The
way to overcome is to stop looking for the ways that you are a victim and to start
looking for the ways to overcome your own circumstances, your environment, society,
etc.... It's up to you."
Preeti
Bhonsle, Author, 27 Broken Footprints
Updated Jan 13, 2013
That I am responsible for my own happiness.
It was one beautiful afternoon and I was in my garden, and then I realized that I have
it all in me to keep myself happy.
And it was another beautiful dark night, when it dawned upon me: it's all in the mind.
Everything is in my mind.
Robert
Nolan, Experiential Augmentation Designer
No single insight changed my life the more than any other on its own. There is a chain
of insights, however, which has had a most profound eect on my experience.
1. In life we each develop an ego, and the innate tendency is to identify with it.
2. Everything we sense and do in our experience is dependent upon beliefs and
denitions which are contained within ourselves, and without our ego.
3. Everything we sense and do in our experience is inherently neutral, and it is the
relationships between our egos and things in our experience which give the positive
and negative tint to everything.
4. Limits to our apprehension are self-manifested. They exist within us, and as such it
is always our choice to remain bound by them or transcend them. Whether we
recognize this as possible depends on the relationship between the ego and the limit.
5. We each have an "anti-ego" to complement our ego, whether it's consciously active
or not. While the ego uses the "I" pronoun, the anti-ego uses the "we". The ego
corresponds to experienced actuality, and the anti-ego to potentiality.
6. We are not the ego nor the anti-ego. Both are tools, channels through which we
bring the possibilities of ourselves into reality. We realize ourselves when the
channels are so pure and aligned as to be undetectable.
7. The only way for a channel to be truly pure is faith in oneself and one's experience.
This means trascending everything from observation to understanding and from
reection to compulsive choice.
8. Wisdom cannot be held - it emerges organically in the moment. True choice cannot
be made beforehand - it, too, emerges organically in the moment. Both are only
allowed when one has the faith to let go and be fully present, fully real, without
holding back.

Elke
Weiss, Everyone is entitled to my views
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Written or24
Sep Search Quora Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
..It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll, Internet
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I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul. Invictus
I love this idea. The world is dark and cold and full of terrors (thank you, GRR Martin)
and we can only rely on ourselves.
There might not be a happy ending. But we need to take responsibility for what we
can do and change.
843 Views View Upvotes Answer requested by Hansi Mittermeier
Leandro
Antonio, make the NOW the main focus of your life.
Now, this moment is all there really is.
Often we're troubled by events yet to happen in the future. What shall we eat? Where
shall we live? What might happen to us?
Still other times we're troubled by our past. What if I had known this earlier? What if I
had made better choices?
But both are eeting, only made real in our minds.

Rakesh
Iyer, Aam Aadmi
Well, I don't know if it has changed my life or not, but it has certainly changed the way
I am now thinking of things in my life.
Having watched the character of Uzumaki Naruto in the anime Naruto, I think the
insight which I gained is that it's people around us, who accept us for what we are,
without judging us, who are our biggest wealth, and that it's their acceptance which
gives us sanity if nothing else. And if one does not get such acceptance, one suers
probably the harshest pain in his/her life: that of solitude, almost as worse as that of
hatred if nothing else.
Brad
Heers, knows a decent amount about a lot of things, and a lot
about only a few things.
Written Aug 10
My senior year of high school I attended a jazz band festival and competition. There
were various sessions which one could attend, and a particular session was ~45
minute improvisation session. This is a room of probably 300 people, with a single
professor sharing his thoughts. So this couldnt be too in-depth, and in hindsight he
clearly wanted to convey a single overarching theme.
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He started by sharing some general thoughts about improvisation, and what one
wants to think aboutall of this I have long forgotten. But about 10 minutes in, he got
to his key point. He stated I am going to play some backing music and will play an
improvisational solo. Now please listen carefully and pretend that you are going to
judge my performance. I will do this twicethe rst time will be Solo A, followed by
a brief break, and then I will repeat with Solo B. Listen carefully and I will then ask
all of you to vote as to which is the better solo.
He played his two solos. Solo A was goodvery nice, and much better than I couldve
expected to do (it happened that he also played the same instrument as I did, so I
appreciated this). It was very good, but not great. Then Solo B cameit was all over
the place, some kind of crazy mishmash that was great energy and REALLY good.
Weird, but very good.
He then asked us to vote by a show of hands. Probably 1020% of the audience voted
Solo A as the better solo, with at least 7075% voting Solo B as better (and a few
abstaining). Then the hard question comeshe asks all of us 1418 year old kids
Clearly Solo B is the better in your eyes. Why? Silence for a good 2030 seconds.
Almost none of us could tell him why. Surely somebody has a thought., he
encourages. A girl in front of my shyly raises her hand and he calls on her. She tries to
answer the question, saying Im not sure why B is better than A, but I notice some
things about them. I denitely liked B better, but I dont think I should havein A you
seemed to follow all of the proper conventions of an improvisational solo, and I think
you violated most of them in B. But I liked it better. I dont know why it liked it better,
but I do know that I probably SHOULD HAVE liked A better. He thanked for her
answer and asked if anybody else could add to this. A boy slightly expanded on it,
noting that he had voted for A for the reasons given by the girl, but that he
recognized that B was somehow intangibly better.
Then the reveal cameFor those of you who answered, you were completely right,
and in fact this is the point of this. For Solo A, I followed every convention and I gave
a very good and clean solo. For Solo B, I violated every convention and I intentionally
broke a number of rules. This solo should not have worked. But it did, but not because
I broke the rules, but for another reason you have missed. In Solo A, despite me doing
everything correctly, I intentionally worked to convey an uncertainty, a lack of
condence in myself and in what I was doing. I did everything correctly, but didnt act
like it. In Solo B, I broke every rule, but I owned it, and I was condent and convicted
in my performance.
When you are in front of people, you have to OWN what you are doing, you have to
be condent in what you are doing. Believe it or not, that is even more important than
getting it technically right. The best thing is to know what you are doing and have
your condence come from competence, but being competent is not enough. If your
audience doesnt believe in your competence because you fail to show it, they will
reward a less competent person who owns what they are doing.
He then summarized This is what makes some of the great jazz virtuosos greatthey
knew what they were doing, and they unafraid to break the rules and make their own
rules. But when they did, everybody listening and watching knew they were making
their own rules and doing it with condence and artistry.
He went on to give more examples around this theme and dive into some examples of
famous jazz improvisational solos, talking about trusting yourself and not being
hindered by rule. But at the core of all of this was the rst two sentences of his
thesis: When you are in front of people, you have to OWN what your doing, you
have to be condent in what you are doing. Believe it or not, that is even more
important than getting it technically right.
I have used this insight thousands of times as an engineer in presentations and
meetings, and away from work on-stage in theater productions, on-stage musically,
and simply in front of people as a coach or leader in other ways. I have probably
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shared this story dozens (perhaps more than a hundred times) to others because I
have found it to be so pervasively true.
Vicky
van
der
Zee, MSc Applied Linguistics at Oxford, Young
Entrepreneur since the age of 17
Written Mar 9, 2016
When I am very busy and my to-do list contains a thousand bullet points, I remind
myself of the fact that I can drop any activity at any time.
It does not matter what I am doing exactly; whether it concerns my studies, my

company, the sta I employ, my friends, or my family... I know I can always rely on
my own ability to stand up for myself and quit doing the things which are taking up
too much of my time or that I do not want to devote time to any longer.
Over the years, my friends have gotten used to the fact that I do not always join in on
group nights, and my family know I might opt out of a holiday because of my work: I
know I have to make sacrices and trying to t every single opportunity into my life is
simply not possible.
I do not remember who gave me this advice and that is sad, because I would love to
thank him/her for changing my life.
Adam
Taha, Sharing Lessons From Personal Life Experiences
Updated Sep 25
That love...is never enough. Love doesn't conquer all.
It was years later we met again. An Arab woman. The very woman who approached
me once and who asked for my number and I liked her condence.
I thought she was dierent to most Arab women. Unafraid what others think and is
now wanting to live the life she wanted.
But when it came time to make the decision...she lacked the courage to do so.
Now, years later we were standing face to face and somehow life brought us together
to say hello.
It wasn't planned. It just happened that I was walking from a meeting with a record
label for an album I was working on.
I remember she told me before I said goodbye...
I wish I could be with you but I can't because parents, religion, community
might talk.
I wish I could see you again but I can't...I'm getting married. Her parents
wanted to marry a certain guy.
I wish I could do this and that.....and on and on owed her reasons.
I just listened. I didn't pine over her. I didn't cry and bitch. I just listened. When she
had nished talking I said..
"Is there anything else you need to say to me?"
"No."
I embraced her and said, "I hope you have a wonderful life."
Then I walked away. I didn't look back and just kept walking on. I wanted to make it
easier on her. I knew it was hard enough on her and so if that's what she wanted then
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so be it.
I realised then, love is not enough.
Love will never be enough.
This is coming from a man who is a romantic but not some chump, a Nice Guy who
put women on a pedestal. I am a singer, songwriter, I write much on the topic of love,
romance but now...I must add...love is not enough.
I thought to myself...
"Isn't it funny, how people talk about love, faith, and yet they cannot ght for the
love they believe in. They live for others, community, people, parents, but not for
themselve. I don't believe in faith but experience and this now gave me
experience to know..."
Years later, we nd ourselves standing and staring at each other. After the small talk
she said...
"I got divourced. It's being nalised next week."

"I'm sorry to hear that." I said, "I hope you're ok."
"I'm not." she said, "I have been thinking about you alot lately. How can I be so stupid. I
messed up what we had."
I didn't say anything and just listened.
"Is there any chance that....?" She said.

"No, I'm not that guy anymore."
"But I still love you."
"It's dierent now.."
"But tell me why, please?" She asked.
And so I said, and these aren't exact words but near enough..
"You're faith wasn't enough. Your belief in God wasn't enough. You're God wasn't big
enough, strong enough to see He could nd a way for us two. All you saw is limitations,
what couldn't happen and what is. You didn't believe enough that faith can somehow x
it. This wasn't infatuation. It was love but all you saw was fear, rules, customs,
traditions, what other people think, what you're relative thought, bigger than the God
you believed in when it came to me. Now you're talking about love? Love is not enough
either. It wasn't enough then and it won't be if we were to face challenges later on..."
After we talked some more, we embraced, said our goodbyes and I never saw her
again.
The most single insight that changed my life is........love is never enough.
It needs real belief, courage, work, knowledge, skills, relationship management,

patience, a lot of loving, caring, and....maybe more. It needs the other person as well
to do the same.
Love is never enough.
Love doesn't conquer all.

Simon
Brown, It was better once
Gecko's from the Australian bush/forest.
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When I was about 8 or 9 I was walking through the bush up the road from my place
where a lot of gecko's lived, heaps of them living in low scrubby bushes. I had seen
these little guys hundreds of times before but this day I really saw them for who they
were, little guys living in a community trying to get by in life, that was a huge day for
me and changed me forever.
Morgan
Evans, I can answer questions
Written Aug 15
That I was an extrovert, and I liked public speaking.
I grew up a homeschooled kid with a handful of friends, and never gave a speech until
I went to school. I was never satised with my social life, but I survived, and was
content enough not to do anything about it. When I moved to my new school in
Tennessee, I had absolutely no friends for the rst semester. It was painful, I'd go
entire school days not speaking to anyone unless spoken to by a teacher. I wasn't
happy- being that one kid who always sits by themself at lunch was miserable.
One day, I decided to gure out why I wasn't happy. I realized it was because I wasn't
speaking to people. When my rst class presentation came around 2nd semester, I
realized that I was an extrovert. I loved public speaking, but more importantly I
thrived on being with people and talking. I took matters into my own hands. I
introduced myself to a new, quiet girl in my social studies class, and we clicked. She
was in the same position as I, we both were extroverts but had only just realized it. We
were best friends for the following 2 years, and although we both have other friends
now, we still remain pretty close.
This realization was the catalyst I needed to change my life and become the person I
was meant to be, and I think that would qualify as a pretty powerful thing.
Gautam
Bajaj, A callow romantic. An adolescent esthete. An atavistic
wanderer of the wasteland
No matter what you do, you'll die someday and you can't do anything to stop it. So, if
death is the ultimate truth, why live life, as nothing actually matters to you after you
are dead ?
I believe this is a trap, in which we are all caught. The only option we have is to live
the current moment , now to live the current moment , we have two options :
1- Live the way others want us to.

2- Live the way we like it.
You probably don't want to live the life what someone else wants. You want to live a
life that you want.
So, start living it right here right now, as whatever you do it won't be a big deal as
death will come sooner or later .
what I mean is, nothing is worth being sad or tensed as your time is limited and you
don't want to waste it that way. Internet
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Enjoy this life.

Tahseena
Kahn, Mistakes that don't kill you only make you stronger.
People do not change. The sooner you accept it, the sooner you'll nd yourself in
serenity. Nothing will bother you. No one will bring drama to your life. This applies
to any relationship and all walks of life whether it is an employee, new friend, new
partner or roommate. The moment you accept the person as is, you'll nd the peace.
If you want to be in a healthy relationship, nd someone who is more compatible with

you instead of trying to change that person. Think about your closest friends and why
they are your friends. Your mate should not be someone from the sky or heaven but
have similar qualities. Compatibility comes from similar values, lifestyles,
preferences and dreams. If you can't accept him/her as is, just let them go and pursue
someone else for your own sanity. Don't try to rescue them. Don't try to change them.
By trying to mold them into someone they are not or cannot be, you not only waste
your valuable time but lose your sanity and peace. Your need to control or change
someone comes from your own issue. You probably had a parent who pushed you too
hard or expected you to be perfect. You must accept that no one is perfect and neither
are you. Everyone has a strength that is dierent from the other. You might be
excellent in one area but weak in another. Someone else is excellent in your weak
area. This is why you don't see engineers/scientists writing a movie screen play or
writers to design a space craft.
In a nut shell, if you have self love, you should not try any of the followings if you
want to have great relationships (both personal and professional) or marriage:
1. You shouldn't expect a sh to climb the tree. It will only frustrate the sh and
yourself. You'll be nagging for nothing.
2. You should not expect a lazy bum to turn into a high achiever. Most high achievers
are type A since birth. Their whole life reects their personality. Even if they fall,
they will cry for a day and get up and rise again. And lazy bums are lazy all their lives.
There's nothing wrong with them. They are just lazy. Unless they decide to change
their lives drastically and dramatically, nothing and no one will change them.
3. You should not expect a hoarder to not hoard. Some people like to keep stu. Some
like to clean their stu. It's just the personality. You can't change.
4. You should not expect a messy person to become neat, clean and organized. It's not
your fault that his/her upbringing did not teach them to clean after themselves. You
are not their parent. You can work as a mentor to help them change their lives for
better but make sure that person should not be your partner but stays as mentee.
5. You should not expect a player to commit to you. A player plays with heart due to
his/her commitment issues caused by deep seated childhood issues. They do commit
when they are ready especially when their biological clock is ticking. Then they will
pick the rst person they see on the street and it won't make sense. You may be
wondering why but do not waste your time solving the puzzling. Your self worth
should not depend on their approval or view of you. The sooner you identify you are
dating a player and you deserve a faithful person, the sooner you should dump them
because they will only waste your valuable time.
6. You should not drag an introvert to a an active social life. Some introverts do
attend social events but they do need isolation to gain their energy back. They don't
like to be around people all the time. You must respect it.
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7. You cannot turn a social buttery into home-bound. They will be miserable without
the external stimulation that they get from the people. Again you must respect their
wish to be themselves.
8. You also cannot stop a cheater from cheating on you again. People don't change.
The sooner you detach yourself from negative people or accept awed people as is,
the sooner you'll get your sanity back.
Archana
Goyal, Writer, poet, equalities, social, human and communities
support.
Thanks Kelley Spartiatis for suggesting I turn my comment into an answer.
My 8 year old DD said something very wise yesterday while playing a video game.
"Sadness is like a bomb, it puts you to a halt."
I was so taken back by her summing up of what depression can do to us in life. So

being positive is the only way forward.
Thanks Jay Bazzinotti for reiterating what I always believe in being positive and
attitude and intention counts.
Alfred
Dominic
Vella, Whistle blower who learnt the hard way, the
system wants you to turn a blind eye
In 1998 when I tried to whistle-blow about some of the wrongdoings that I saw at the
University of Luton I was naive and thought that corruption was a local issue. As I
went up through the systems that were supposed to protect whistle blowers I
discovered the fact that the system looks after itself and protects the wrongdoers.
This seems to be because no one knows if the next layer up is corrupt or not so they
play safe and turn a blind eye. I was often told that they could do nothing about what
was going on.
So from then onwards I myself have played safe and have not worked directly for a
'boss' preferring to contribute in my own way.
It certainly gave me a keen sense of schadenfreude when I see the corruption in

parliament and elsewhere being exposed.
All I can think of is 'I told you so'.
Emotions For Which There Are No Words in English

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Tarun
Michael
Johnson, free bird
Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right.
Henry Ford
John
MacIntyre, Software consultant
Written Feb 7, 2013
Simply reading a book can improve your life.
It wasn't until I was an adult that I discovered a) that bit of additional knowledge can
sometimes catapult you to almost appear to be an 'expert', b) there are books to help
you acquire *any* skill, c) most books suck, so if you aren't getting value, move on to
another, and d) since most people don't read, it's a huge competitive edge.
Alden
Tan, Making your life better today without stupid advice.
Written Nov 9
The work is the goal.
Told to me by Ryan Holiday himself.
You work because the work is the goal.
Wake up everyday, get your ass to work, nish up your daily tasks, go to sleep.
Repeat.
Thats it. Thats the goal.
You dont work for a big break, a breakthrough, to be discovered or some super lucky
windfall.
You just work everyday because the work is the goal itself.
Do it slowly. Do it small.
One day, youd have created something big.
Fuck your dreams! The work is the goal! Be happy! Get my free book: 12 Things Happy
People Dont Give a Fuck About!
Tim
Hinds, I think being 70, qualies as experience in living
Written Dec 17
I had a friend once tell me it is good to help others, but don't let their problems
become your problems. I asked how one know when that is happening, he replied
when your quality of life is being negatively aected. I took that to heart and
learned when enough is enough. It made life much easier for me because I had a
tendency to get overly involved when others needed my help. The rst time I applied
that was years ago when we took in a young couple with two toddlers, who were going
to be on the street. I spoke to my wife about it and we decided to let them s Tay with
us briey. But before we did. We laid down the conditions. First they had to wash all
their clothes in our laundry. Then they had 10 days to nd a more permanent solution
and there would be me extensions. We felt that was as long as we could deal with the
situation. They and family but refused to ask them for help. I told them if they get
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down to the wire they would have to reach out to them. Just as I gured the day before
the 10 days were up, they still had not found a solution. I reminded them that there
would be no extensions and they would have to leave the next day. I asked if they
contacted their family and they hadn't. I to.d them it looked like their only option.
Finally they capitulated and called his parents and told them their situation. His
parents were elated because they had never seen their grandchildren and didn't even
know where they were. So they went to stay with them and all worked out for the
better and they were reunited with their family. Had I not stuck to my guns, who
know what would have happened. But we did what we could without inheriting their
problems.
Julio
Cesar
Samorano
Filho, works at Ptria Investimentos
"Everyone has a story you don't know"
It is a pretty known statement, but since the rst time I heard it, it touched me deeply.
It makes me always remember to not judge people and to respect everyone's choices.
Kenyatta
Leal, Aspiring entrepreneur
Are the results of my behavior meeting my needs over time?
All communications between inmates and external channels are facilitated by approved
volunteers since inmates do not have access to the internet. This program with Quora is
part of The Last Mile San Quentin. Twitter: @TLM
Ned
Harrison, former (Retired) military; retired store/mall Santa
Written Sat
Mr Harrison, all your problems stem from the same root cause. You have no
empathy. I think you must be a sociopath. And you certainly have no business being
in a romantic relationship.
I was on my third marriage. It was failing, utterly. I couldnt understand it; it didnt
make any sense, to me. People didnt make any sense. They were irrational,
egotistical, and prone to wild bouts of emotion that made absolutely no sense. They
acted in ways that were obviously not in their best interest. Explicit rules I could
follow; but there were whole realms of implicit rules I just couldnt gure out. It was
like I was color-blind, and everyone around me was getting cues that were invisible.
And thats exactly what it was. Once I knew that, everything else became MUCH
easier.
Aditya
Vempaty, Lover of disruption of the status quo, older brother and
human being who is ever changing
Written Jan 2, 2013
The moment I realized that life requires work to achieve anything you want, nothing
comes easy and to eliminate anything you feel is not helping mentally.
The moment I believed this it literally changed myInternet

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entire view on how I approach
situations, people and ideas.
Seth
Mohan, We don't inherit the Earth from our ancestors, we borrow it
from our children
Written Aug 9
On a day-to-day basis most us are not cognizant of the passage of time. We often
reect on how time has passed when we hit a milestone like a birthday, anniversary,
or New Years Eve.
However, the time is passing as I type this answer. Your life and my life is happening
right now. What are you doing to make the most of it ?
Im going to make a delicious cup of coee :-)

Miguel
Valdespino, Eclectic interests, deep thoughts
Written Jan 1, 2013
When I was younger, I used to think things went in cycles. You'd have some good
times and then you'd have some bad times. The problem I was having is that I
became afraid to have good times for fear of the inevitable crash that was coming. I'd
never truly enjoy the good times, and I ended up causing the bad times. I was pretty
miserable, and I was tired of all this apprehension and self pity.
One night I just had enough and let go. I don't know how I did it, and it's both the
hardest and easiest thing I've ever done. Arsne Hodali posted a quote from Stephen
Fry in comic form about this above.
In one night the world changed. The "cycle" was broken. My new view was that
"Good and bad things are going to happen to me. I'm going to try to be as happy as I
can in the circumstances." Sometimes this isn't very happy. But there's always
something worse that could have happened. I've chuckled after getting in a car crash
that totaled my car. You see, nobody got seriously hurt and that's a wonderful thing.
p.s. That night I met a girl. The girl that i eventually lost my virginity with.
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Somdip
Dey, Love. Life. CrossFit. Bodybuilding. LifeCoach. ....and every
*shit* in betw
Written Tue
You can't connect the dots looking forward you can only connect them
looking backwards.
~Steve Jobs, Stanford Commencement Adress, 2005
I myself, is a strong believer of this. Everything I have learned or known or

experienced, might not have seen valuable at the beginning or for the moment, but all
of those somehow became useful at some other point in my life. So I have my own
saying,
There is no wrong move, those are all knowledge and experience.

Aritra
Bose, JU Civil | Cricket Enthusiast !
Realising the fact that there will always be someone better than you in most of the
spheres of your life - this was one such insight that changed my life.
You dont have to remain distraught thinking relentlessly that one of your friend or
acquaintance had relatively moved ahead in his/her life and had become successful.
Because in the end what really matters is the amount of eort you did put in to
achieve what you wanted to and eventually you will succeed. It might take a day, it
might take a year or even a decade ,but in the end YOU WILL SUCCEED.
Meanwhile,keep calm and stay happy. CHEERS !

Yogendra
Paranjpe, engineer by profession, traveller by passion, nature
lover by obsession, poet by inspiration
"At the end of every game of chess, the king and the pawn are put back in the same
box"
Manas
J
Saloi, Still a long way to go.
First of all there is no single piece of insight, advice or any damn life experience that
will change your life overnight. Change is most of the times a gradual process.
Still I would like to share one incident which taught me pretty early, a lesson in life
about the ways of the world.
When I was a teen I used to drown myself in self pity pretty fast. If I ever felt wronged,
I would get depressed, stop eating my food and lock myself up.
During one such phases(after I had had a huge ght with my Dad over some petty
issue and I was on an usual behavior),the Bhaiya ( Helper ) who used to work at our
house (and was pretty close to me )sat beside me and asked me what I was getting
with all my drama.
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He pointed out my foolishness by saying something on these terms. I do not

remember the exact words though- "Every one in this world will eat their rice,
whether you eat yours or not. People will care for some time but most will give up on
you unless you make the eort to get on your toes yourself. No one likes a self pitying
crying bitch. Every one in this family are done with dinner while you are punishing
yourself and foolishly believing that by not eating your food you will gain something "
It is not like that I decided to eat my food straight away after listening to that; it only
happens in movies. But I did understood the concept and have always tried to tell
myself the same thing. "Everyone will always eat their rice, it is up to me whether I am
eating mine or not".
When you are left behind in life, are down, or feel that your whole life is not going the
same way it was going before, it is very easy to resort to self harm and pity. Don't.
Thanks to Shewali Tiwari for reminding me this again recently.

Anonymous
My father always told me, "There will always be someone better than you at
whatever it is you choose to do. That's just life." before you think, "that's a cruel
thing to tell a child," he and I and the rest of my family were all on the same
wavelength about that. My parents brought it up as a way of dealing with the losses
my sister and I often had in musical performance competitions. "There will always be
someone better than me, somewhere," I knew. "But even though I lost the contest,
that doesn't mean that my performance had nothing of value."
Well, around the time I was a freshman in college, I was sharing some short stories I'd
written with a friend of mine. They were really weird, bizarre stories, way out of my
normal writing comfort-zone. My friend handed them back and said, "Only you
could have written this." I didn't think too hard about that statement: I said thanks,
I asked for suggestions, I wanted to know about typos, etc. But later that night, when I
went home and started reading over the stories again, I realized that I wasn't being
proud enough of them.
My father had brought up that old someone-is-always-better-than-you line quite a lot

in my youth-- I'd stuck my neck out in enough competitions to have lost many times.
Until high school, I'd taken a lot of comfort in the idea that there would always be
people better than me: it made it easier for me to accept failure. But now here I was, at
one of my rst-choice colleges, developing a voice in ction that was unmistakably
clear and unique. And I thought: no, dad, my friend is right-- I'm actually fucking
great at this. When it comes to writing, I am actually THE BEST IN THE WORLD at
writing in my own particular style. That's the whole point of having a clear, unique
voice.
And I realized: if I do expressive work for the rest of my life, and if I make clarity of
voice a priority, then no, I'm not actually competing with anyone else-- just with
myself. And this means the stakes are now higher, because there's no excuse for me
to suck. If I suck at writing, it doesn't mean that someone else beat me-- it simply
means that I suck, nothing more, nothing less. So I realized: I can't let myself suck. I
need to be incredibly great, all the time, because I have no competitors and no excuse
not to be absolutely the best in the universe at what I'm doing. No one else can write
what I can write. It's all on me.
This freeing insight proved thick and sturdy armorInternet

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in the creative writing department
at my school, where it was easy to feel pressured by professors and other students. I
felt immune from competition. Where my friends would worry about pleasing a
professor or a workshop class, I had an absolutely ironclad belief in my own towering
superiority at being me (and in the absolute necessity of being excellent at being me).
I knew that if I worked to satisfy myself, my nal products would speak for
themselves. And they did. I completed a honors thesis and won a large cash prize for
it.
My dad's original insight is, maybe, technically true for many disciplines and
professions, but it is predicated on the idea of individuals being in competition with
one another, or being rankable-- on the idea that personal failure can be due to the
way you look compared to other people. But my friend's casual praise of my weird
story broke me of that worldview. I currently write for a living, and yes, it is possible
for one person to be better at writing than another person-- but once you start talking
about good writers, it stops being about who is "better." Success and failure is
contained entirely within myself. Everyone and everything else is irrelevant.
To be honest, I tend to think that this insight is not limited specically to writing and
other creative arts. Since this change of perspective, I've found that I can really carve
out a niche for myself anywhere I want to be. It's mostly an issue of perspective and
my own positive mental state, but those are real, powerful things. If I don't want to be
in competition with anyone, I don't have to be. And I'm not.
Mariam
Naeem
Khan, writer, editor, journalist
Written Oct 13
Never chase Love.
Love is not to be begged for; Love is to be felt, manifested, celebrated and enjoyed.
Dont chase someone thinking he will Love you one day. He will never Love you.
Instead, live your life to the fullest, for this precious time will never return.
Love will nd you itself, and things will be just ne!

Raviteja
Chirala, Data Scientist, Avid Programmer..
Written Apr 3, 2016
Never blame others even when you know it's their mistake.
It's often said but less followed. Frankly its been ages since I blamed someone for
something that hurt me. Deep down I know it's me who gave an opportunity to others
to hurt me. Life has become much better now. I have got an attitude to think whatever
bad happens has a meaning in it and see what I can do to make it better. Who has
done it or why they have done it probably won't help me or the situation. It's all about
what I can do it make it better.
Trust me, Life is long enough to enjoy every moment and short enough to blame
others.

Ask or Search
Raunak
Soni, EnjoyQuora
life- Give and take as many life advices as possible Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
Written Feb 4, 2013
Life is strange, sometimes very dark, and very uncertain. Some think of life as
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passion, and some think of life as what a man is willing to give his or her thoughts to.
Some call life a continual cycle of new surprises, while some say that life is one thing
after another, as it were only a series of events.
One thing that we may all conclude about life is that it is denitely what you make it.
You will always have a choice in life, and from these choices you will have laid out the
path you traveled, whether it is one that you had to beat down and create for yourself,
or whether it is a road that you traveled along with everyone else who wasn't really too
much interested in making their life their own.
Make out of life whatever it is that you desire to make out of it, just be sure to
make something.
Juan
Pablo
Forero, Used to be depressed but I overcomed it and know
I feel good with myself.
When I was 14 or 15, I read a book called sicario (the name in english would be
something like Hitman but it's not completely accurate, sicarios are the name of
young boys that kill for, usually, payed by narc dealers), written by Alberto Vazquez-
Figueroa.
So this was a real life story about a man that had to live since a child in the streets of
Bogot (the capital of Colombia), around the 70s, as a gamin (the name that it was
given here in Colombia to children that lived in the streets). He had so strong
situations that lead him to become a sicario, and later a drug mule, a experience
where his girlfriend died. The only good experience he had when it was a child was
when someone payed him a night at a hotel where he could sleep in a bed, imagine
that. We take for granted sleeping in a bed.
It opened my eyes about why a person would become a killer. I don't justify that
behavior but now I take my time before judging why someone does what they do,
some people just can't do something else, life decides for them. We cannot judge
others from our own experiences, we have to understand not all people have the
opportunities we have. That book changed my life forever.
Surya
Teja, In search of the Ultimate truth
"Normal life? There's nothing called a normal life. What is normal from one's
viewpoint may be most abnormal from another's. A yogi thinks that the world is
abnormal and people behave like animals, mostly focused on feeding and fornicating.
The world thinks that the yogi is a fool who wastes his life sitting around doing
nothing, enjoying none of the many pleasures life has to oer" - If truth be told, A
monk's memoir by Om Swami.
Gave me a new outlook on the things I saw.

Gwen
Danish, Been there, done that and still kicking
Written Jul 4, 2016
Learn to love yourself
I learned that i am responsible for myself in every aspect of my life, in health, life,
love, my relation with God. Internet
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I was in a moment when nobody was there for me during my hard times and in my
sickness. I used to depend on people to help and support me. But then i realized it
when i struggle in my sickness and depression and i had nobody there to help me, i
knew that i needed to take care of myself and do whatever it takes to get myself better.
Parents, friends, partner, people around you may not always be there for you 24/7
when you need them. You must learn to take care of yourself and love yourself, body
and soul. Your body is your ride for your soul, if your ride is in good condition,
automatically you will have a positive soul. Its you who feel the pain and suering
when you are sick, sad, unhappy, not other people. Its also you who feel good when
you are healthy, grateful, happy. Nobody can take that away from you. The way you
spread love to other people starts from within.
Again, if you don't love yourself, then who will ?
Abhinav
Sharma, works at Facebook
We take people who care for us the most for granted and waste a lot of time worrying
about what people who don't care for us, think about us. This is almost involuntary,
one should try and pick up some early signs and adjust his/her attitude. Trust me, it'll
take your mind o a substantial amount of 'garbage'.
Rahithya
Sampathi, studied at Indian Institute of Technology, Kanpur
Written Mar 9, 2014
No matter what you think, wish, do, you nd people slandering you at the back. Dont
give a damn !
Brendon
Lemon, Sales Development Manager at Vibes (2015-present)
Written Jan 18
That I was okay just the way I was.

The biggest revelation came about as an epiphany I was searching my whole life
until that point to nd what was wrong with me. It drove me nuts, I was obsessed with
nding my faults and remedying them.
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I had a mania, and that prevented me from actually doing things that would help me
have a full and fullling life.
In a tense, hot moment I was angry at myself, angry at God for making me awed, and
angry at the world for not being perfect, and it hit me: The problem with me is that I
dont have a problem and Im desperately searching for one.
As soon as I accepted that I was awed the way I was and that was okay I started
making choices that bettered my life. I started to love myself. I allowed others to love
me. I let myself make mistakes and didnt judge myself harshly when it happened.
Accepting yourself for who you are is the rst step to accepting your aws, which you
have to accept in order to also accept your strengths.
Shabin
Mahadevan, Car enthusiast
Written Mar 5, 2014
This picture.
(spare 5 seconds of your time to see it.)
It might change your perspective just like it changed mine.

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Dirag
Biswas, Life Gave Me Lemons, So I Made A Huge Subatomic
Particle Accelerator. Beat That.
Written Apr 8, 2016
"No One Will Ever Remember You After You Die, If You Keep Giving Yourself
Excuses As To Why You're Happy Where You Are."
I Think The One Thing That Holds Us Back Is The Fear Of Shame, Of Failure. For Me,
That's The Reason Why I Never Took Part In Stage Events.
I Was Afraid Of Failures. I Was Afraid That People Would Mock, And Make Fun
Of Me.
It Was That Fear That Held Me Back.
I Lived A Very Boring Life, And When I Looked At The Ones Living Better O Than
Me, I Asked Myself "Why? Why Can't I Be Like Them?"
I Always Wanted To Help Humanity Ever Since I Was 7 Years Old. I Was Crazy And
Eccentric, And Got Called Names For That.
"Mad Scientist"/ " Pagal Scientist", "Freak Of Nature", et cetera.

Name Calling Was Survivable, Discrimination And Alienation Was Not. Which Was
Why I Had Two-Three Depression Periods Of My Life Before I Hit The Age Of 13.
I Needed Hope. And There Was No One To Give MeInternet

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Hope.
I Had To Forge It Myself.
I Became A Nihilist. A Believer Of The Idea That Life Is Meaningless.
And, As You Can Expect, I Was More Alienated After That. But I Didn't Worry About
That, I Began My Own Journey.
"Sure, Life Is Meaningless. And That's A Good Thing To Me Because We Can

Dene It Ourselves."
I Don't Know Who My Great Grandpops Was. He Probably Lived A Good And Fun
Filled Life, Hanging Out With Pals Of His Time And Doing His Thing Before He
Kicked The Bucket.
Does Anybody Remember Him Now? Nope.
But..
I Know Who George Washington Was. He Was A Great, Eccentric Man Who Built A
Nation. He Changed The World Around Him, Stayed As Far As He Could From His
Comfort Zone. Then Received His Call From Heaven.
Does Anybody Remember Him Now? Absolutely.
These Thoughts Were Eye-Opening.
Because "Log Kya Sochenge?"/ "What Will People Think?" Has Only One Denite
Answer,
People DON'T Give Two Shits About You.
People Only Care About Themselves. And That's Life.
You Tell A Random Guy That You Lost Your Wallet? He Will Be Sorry, But Won't
Give A Shit Later On.
Live Your Life. Please.

Experiment. Travel. Learn. Grow. Love. Just Keep Moving NO MATTER WHAT.
And I Made Use Of These Insights,
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Ran A Marathon For Pete's Sake
Volunteered For Lead Singing In A Carol Competition. I Have Taken No

Singing Classes Before. That Was My First Stage Performance. And Our Class
Stood First, In The Entire School.
Took Up The Job Of Designing An App For A Startup, Even If I Didn't Know
Anything About App Designing
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Directed Short Films And Won The Hearts Of Editors And Movie Directors
Across India. Oh, And I Edited Them Using Windows Movie Maker(Yes,
You Read That Right). Can't Believe It? See For Yourself .
Currently Practicing ICSE And SAT Papers. Plan To Nail The SAT And Move
To The US By 2018/19. And To All My Classmates Telling Me It's Impossible:
"Watch Me."
And I'm Only 14. (Yes, You Read That Right Too)
If You Liked This Answer, Be Sure To Follow Me For More!
Have The Nicest Day, :)
Dirag Biswas
Geng
Zhang, just winging it
Not everyone is gonna like you. That's ok.


Faisal
Hourani, The Web Specialist @ WebMedic.com
Ask
Written or13
Nov Search Quora Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
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I don't want to be a cog in the machine.
Back in 2013 I graduated from university doing a bachelors degree in Mobile

Computing.
As a freelance developer, I wanted to continue my education in IT and become a

better programmer so I applied and got accepted to continue my masters degree.
While waiting for my student visa, I went to do my freelance work at a co-working

space (The Nest).
The Nest was the home for a venture builder (MGVD) and few startups. Unlike other
spaces, it was in a bungalow house with a swimming pool, PlayStation (that we rarely
used because we had so much fun working) and a bunch of passionate entrepreneurs
it was by far the coolest co-working space.
The manager of The Nest had to leave back to his hometown so the owner oered me
the job.
The idea of working alongside passionate entrepreneurs building companies got me

very excited.
I emailed the university and deferred a semester to give me 6 months working at The
Nest before continuing my education.
While working there I learned more than I have during 4 years of university.
It was there where I realised that being a programmer is limited to building tools that
are part of a bigger, more exciting system business.
My freelancing career got supercharged as I stopped seeing myself as a programmer

but as a consultant.
I quit my application to university and went on a journey to build a digital agency.
3 years down the line today, I am learning day by day how dicult it is to build a
company but at the same time how rewarding it is.
No longer a cog in the machine, today I am building my own machine.

Nishaanth
Shanmughasundaram, Passionately Curious
The following insight is a self-realization. At any point in your life, you must have an
activity in which you are a novice. Nothing beats the happiness an amateur derives
when learning the trade ; Its the same reason why children are happy.

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Mohamed
Riyaz, studied at Computer Science
Sometimes, all people want is a little compliment.

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Nazirah
Salauroo, I was born on an island
I look at the sea. It always seems innite to me.
Face the vastness of the sea, and everything behind you will become so insignicant.
I know the oceans are not innite, but to the common man, it is the closest, biggest
thing. It is all around you. It contains life, more than you can ever imagine. It occupies
71% of your planet. And of that, only 5% has been explored yet. All the divisions
created and maintained on land, the ocean life does not follow. Even though all
aquatic forms of life do not consciously help each other, there is so much peace down
there. There is freedom, in its true sense. These plants and animals do not pay anyone
for the water that they drink, or the place that they stay. They just take from nature,
whatever is essential for survival. And then you realize, that like peace and freedom,
there are so many man-manufactured words on land, which have destroyed the
natural way of life and replaced it with something sometimes better, sometimes
worse.
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We sure have comfort in many aspects of our every day lives, but in providing this
comfort to some, we have taken it from somewhere else. There are multiple sides to
everything depending on how you dene it. But among the inhabitants of the ocean,
nobody cares.
Some people look at the sky. But I enjoy the breeze and the sounds of waves more
than anything else.
Todd
Brison, Let's do this thing. www.toddbrison.com/4-ways-of-
redening-success
Written Aug 25
Dont you realize this hurts my feelings too??
My dad and I were on the putting green, only hours after I shot one of my worst scores
in tournament golf. I had been pouting, no doubt, and reminding him of how bad I
sucked.
This isnt a story about golf.
Dont you realize this hurts my feelings too?
I looked up at him, surprised. There were tears in his eyes. That seemed odd. After all,
I was the one who just humiliated myself.
All hed done was:
Take me to every golf event I wanted to go
Get a weekend job at the course so I could play and practice for free
Stayed in a a teaching job he wasnt crazy about to pay for clubs and
tournament fees
Paid to get me lessons so I could compete well
Woke up with me at the crack of dawn to help me get better
Spewed a relentless stream of encouragement whenever I was down
Took an assistant coaching job on the high school team once I made the
roster to spend more time with me
Sacriced time with his friends, his wife, his other son, and himself
Drug my grumpy, self-pitying butt to the course even if I didnt feel like it.
Oh.
I dont remember if I walked across the green and gave him a hug. I dont think we
had a magical healing moment. But in that moment, every sacrice a father made for
his son fell directly on my consciousness. Until that moment, I hadnt seen him as a
person. He was just a dad.
It taught me this:
Your life is never just about you.

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Sharad
Singh, works at Forescout Technologies
That no matter how much you talk to someone, the speaker always has it in him to
shield his deepest thoughts. You can talk to someone daily, but you can never put
down a marker and say for sure that you know that person.
Once we realize the fact, the concept of conversations becomes totally rudimentary.
To think that the relation between two humans is actually based on an abstract, 'trust'
and not a determinate makes me uneasy. It also highlights the complexity that has
evolved into our nature, which has been signicant in propelling our species to where
we are today. However at the same time, its sadly romantic to think that there is
always a possibility that I would never know a substantial portion of someone's life
and that all my interaction with the person will be derived without that bit of
knowledge.
My personal take away from this is to stay kind and to avoid judgement. Also, all
conversations don't mean everything that they promise to be. :)
Claire
Scott, studied at Art Institute of Raleigh - Durham
Written Wed
Ever since I was a young child I've been afraid of people. Everything about people
scared me, the lies and hate, I knew I couldn't trust my fellow human and I lead a
miserable existence from childhood into my formative years as a teen. I was a mess of
Social anxiety and random panic attacks, I could barely leave the house for fear of
having a crippling wave of anxiety, I was forced to go to school but other than that I
secluded myself in the house. Being around people was the bane of my existence, my
greatest fear and my everyday nightmare.
When I was a senior in high school I was in a life altering car accident, I was t-boned
by a tractor trailer on the way home from school. My knee cap was shattered, 3 ribs
were fractured, my face hit the steering wheel and I lost 14 teeth as well as a good deal
of bone in my jaw, my sinuses collapsed and had to be rebuilt, and I had a serve
concussion that left me in a coma for 4 days. I was bed ridden for 5 months. My
teachers were supposed to be sending my work to me but they didn't, so they just
started failing me, from my bed, at home.
Since I didn't want to repeat my senior year because my teachers wouldn't send me
my work after a traumatic car crash, I went back to school on crutches and wearing
dentures (it took 4 years to completely rebuild the lower half of my face). sure, I had
to put my physical training on hold (forever, but that's a dierent story, sort of) and
my concussion left me unable to retain information for longer than a few seconds and
I basicly couldn't read, oh and I couldn't eat with my partal dentures, since they didn't
t right because of the bone loss, so no lunch, but hey, a girls gotta do what a girl was
forced to do even though it was the worst possible solution and my teachers could
have just sent me the work.
So I hobble into school on my crutches and my leg cast that went from my ankle to my
crotch and am greeted by my best friend, who was deantly there for me during this
time, and a group of rubber-neckers who wanted to see the freak show, bacause my
my trauma was the most exciting thing that had happened all year. Some guy who I
didn't like to begin with comes and starts to chat me up, its not like I could run away, I
was an easy target. Same old, nice to see you, how are you doing? Bullshit. And I
give him the same old, I'm ne, thanks for asking bullshit.
And then he said the thing.
He says, you know, I passed by your house everyday and I really thought about
visiting you. Internet
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So I just kinda stood there, you know, on my good leg, because I was on crutches since
my left knee cap was crushed to shit. And I just kinda stared at him, you know
because my brain got smashed against the side of my skull and I stared o into space
in a dense fog sometimes. I had a hard time reading what he just said, you know,
because the trauma to my head made it nearly impossible at times to understand
what was happening around me.
But since I just had brain trauma and I wasn't stupid I completely understood that he
wanted me to thank him.
Me. Yeah, me. He wanted me to be grateful that he thought about me. He took the
time out of his busy schedule of jacking o and stealing his dad's beers to think about
all that misery that surrounded me. What a guy, he knows its the thought that counts.
This process of people telling me they thought about me or prayed about me

continued for About a week. All of them looking for the orgasmic satisfaction of my
humble gratitude. None of these assholes even posted, "get well on my damn
Facebook wall, but they wanted the feel-goods at my expense. As I sat in the dark one
day with a splitting migraine, rocking in pain as my knee felt like someone was
stomping it, my hair falling out in clumps from the sheer stress of it all, tasting blood
in my mouth from my ravged gums, all alone, I had one of those moments of clarity.
The biggest revelation I had ever had and have still ever had to this day:
I hate people
I despise them with every ber of my being and I always have. The disgusting looks on
their faces as they waited for my extatic reply to their thought, the big doppy wide-
eyed anticipation makes me want to vomit to this very day as I type this. The way they
make the same face when they ask you, tell me the truth, do you think I'm
smart/pretty/a good person? With full expectation of being placated. The petty, over
the top reaction they have when you tell them the truth. I hate people, I hate the
deception and the self serving nature. My teachers didnt give a fuck if I failed, my
peers desperately wanted to use my misery as an ego boost for themselves. The school
system shoved me through graduation, since it would look bad if they failed someone
who was one step above a vegetable, my parents forced me to go to college, even
though I stayed one step about a vegetable for the next 3 years until my brain
unscrambled, I was forced to drop out. Now for the rest of my life I have to hear about
how much of a loser I am because I'm a lazy college drop out. That best friend I had
threw me away like garbage because, I don't know why, shitty humans don't give you
closure. I'm in a world that hates me for being gay, for being and atheist, for being a
woman, and as of late, for being fucking skinny.
What do you want from me? Why wouldn't I feel this way?
But there's a bright side to being a misanthrope; I don't care anymore. All that social
anxiety? Poof. Gone. I don't give a fuck about your petty ass opinion, you disguting
shallow piece of crap. Go ahead and think what you want about me, your lower than
dirt in my book, and that's an insult to dirt. Misanthropy is the greatest thing that has
ever happened to me, I completely 100% recommend it.
Come join me, but don't get too close. You sicken me.
Ed
Conley
Written Jan 11
I remember when the Idea suddenly appeared full blown like the rst ower in the
spring: I am not my thinking. Even though this Idea came to me in the 60s, I can still
smell its perfume and see its bright color, for it is still fresh and has not wilted. And
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Idea like this is transformative because it is not a thought. Thoughts come from the
known, from you past, a product of memory. But an Idea comes from the unknown
and integrates the known in a new and unimagined way. The Idea is like one is
speaking ones Word. An Idea can heal the soul by making it whole.
These Ideas are the stepping stones to the Other Shore.

Abhishek
Bhardwaj, We are mere actors in the drama of life.
You cannot keep everyone happy at the same time. No matter how much you do for
others, how much you sacrice there will be a bunch of them unsatised and
cribbing. So stop worrying about what people think of you and start living. ~ Wise
words spoken to me by my classmate when I was in 10th grade. Relieved me of great
pressure.
We say God discriminates. He made some people wealthier some people richer but
there is one thing you'd accept he gave everyone equally. Time. He gave everyone 24
hours. How we utilise them actually make all the dierence. ~ My sister in law to her
son a few days back.
Deepak
Shukla, TedX Speaker. Ironman. Ultramarathon Runner. Muay
Thai Fighter
Written Mar 9, 2016
That it's ok to fail at EVERYTHING you do...
But it's never ok to not try.
1. Envy the man with 100 failures far more than the man with zero failures but
nothing on the chalkboard to show for it
2. Take advice from the counsellor's who's had their heart broken far over the
one who learnt everything they know from a textbook
3. Seek to change their life from someone who changed theirs. Not from the
man who always had it easy
I believe you know the parables.

13.9k Views View Upvotes Answer requested by Balaji Babu
Ify
Obienu, Thinker, Planner, Lawyer.
You alone, are responsible for your happiness.

Paul
Le, studied at McMaster University
Written Mon
To paraphrase, the cards that you are dealt with in your life do not dene the
hand that you play.
In other words, the onus is on you to get what you Internet

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want in life; its not something that
is completely up to pure chance.
The more you work towards something, the more luck you get. Maybe some things
wont work out, and you can say you were actually just unlucky, but at least you tried.
For me, this insight happened to me sometime around the end of high school.
Up until then, I always thought that whatever my life was like at that point, it was
because that was simply what I was destined to have.
Maybe I wasnt the most attractive person in the room. I though was simply just born
that way, and there was nothing I could do change that. Or maybe I was really shy, and
was afraid of talking to a lot of people. I thought thats just how I was born, and Ill
forever struggle to make friends.
It wasnt until a really close friend of mine gave me a little pep talk, that I realized, if I
want something, I should work for it, instead of just hoping that it will come my way
by chance.
Youd be surprised at how much you can change, if only you put in the eort yourself.
Pawan
Burnwal, Suering from Wanderlust, bit by a travel bug
Sorry, I was not able to decide between these two.
It's funny how day by day, nothing changes. But when you look back everything is
dierent.
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This is an excerpt from the book "The Catcher in the Rye".
Among other things, you'll nd that you're not the rst person who was ever confused
and frightened and even sickened by human behavior. You're by no means alone on
that score, you'll be excited and stimulated to know. Many, many men have been just
as troubled morally and spiritually as you are right now. Happily, some of them kept
records of their troubles. You'll learn from themif you want to. Just as someday, if
you have something to oer, someone will learn something from you. It's a beautiful
reciprocal arrangement. And it isn't education. It's history. It's poetry.
Angel
L.
Jaramillo, studies at Psychology (2022)
Written Jan 24
Years ago, I bought a book on a whim. Little did I know that it would completely
transform my life and lead me on the path I tread today.
That book was The Miracle of Mindfulness, and it was the rst book that truly taught
me about the power of mindfulness meditation practice.
The book is technically a letter written by author Thich Nhat Hanh to a friend in
Vietnam at the time, so its not organized particularly well nor does it clearly explain
everything it mentions. But its a beautifully profound book written by someone I
consider a dear teacher. It was more than enough.
At the time, I could barely get my head out of the future long enough to get my work
done and handle all my other responsibilities. I was stressed out about my bills,
worrying about the future and how I was going to support my future son (who was to
be born just months from then), and constantly reected on the disappointment I felt
towards myself for having still not accomplished anything of real value in my life.
Its hard, perhaps impossible, to completely put into words what mindfulness did for
me. When I think of how mindfulness changed my life all I want to do is silently
scream from a mountain top, where no one will hear me but the rocks and clouds.
DISCOVER THE SECRET ABOUT THE LAW OF ATTRACTION TO GET ANYTHING

YOU WANT OUT OF LIFE: HEALTH, WEALTH, LOVE, & HAPPINESS
When I think of how profound discovering, and practicing, mindfulness has been for
me I feel a sense of heaviness in reecting on so many dicult memories, now with a
sense of peace, relief, and sincere joy.
Whether its here in this post or somewhere in the future, I hope the power of
mindfulness nds you as well.
5 Powerful Ways Mindfulness Meditation Will Change Your Life
1. It will help you identify patterns
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I talk often about how mindfulness helps us overcome internal challenges. One way
this is clearly demonstrated is in its ability to help us identify patterns.
What do I mean by identifying patterns? Mindfulness, more than anything else, gives
us clarity. When we begin to gain clarity, we start to be able to identify bad patterns of
behavior such as avoidance when faced with stress and dicult situations, bias or
attitude in the face of a certain person or persons, and a bad habit when handling a
specic strong emotion such as fear or anger.
When we work to identify these patterns and then handle them skillfully, our whole
world can change. Suddenly we see clearly all the various ways we suer and, in many
cases, the simple (but not necessarily easy) solutions to overcoming these bad
patterns of behavior.
2. It will show you clearly the source of the problem (and give you a way to
overcome, or better work with, it)
More than just identifying patterns, with practice mindfulness can show you clearly
where the source of the problem exists altogether.
If you notice you mentally judge a specic person every time you walk up to them,
with practice you may realize that you have a bottled-down sense of envy and
jealousy towards them because you feel inadequate having still not achieved any of
your own goals and dreams. And thats just one of countless examples.
But youre not just left alone at this point to gure out how to overcome it. Many
internal challenges can be overcome by your compassionate and loving presence
alone, needing nothing more than for you to stop and breathe mindfully until the
challenge can dissipate having now risen to the surface of your consciousness.
3. It will give you a way to bring yourself back to center 24/7
Mindfulness isnt restricted to the meditation cushion, although that is the

foundation of mindfulness practice.
Mindfulness is a tool you can use anywhere and anytime you feel overwhelmed,
stressed, anxious, fearful, or angry.
For me, sometimes this was going back to my breath. Other times, this was walking
mindfully or simply stopping and being mindful of the feeling or emotion. In every
case, this was about going back to myself and nourishing my well-being simply and
compassionately with my presence.
4. It will show you the truth of the present moment
My mindfulness practice showed me that the past and present are nothing more than
ideas in our mind.
Sure, the past happened and it may be important, but it doesnt literally exist
anywhere but in memories and in concept.
And the future, while important to plan for, in actual practice is nothing more than
estimations, assumptions, and imagination.
When we live tied to the realms of past and future as much as the present, our lives
suer. Understanding this changed how I live.
I grew up a dreamer, not so much a dreamer as in dreaming of my goals and

aspirations but a literal day-dreamer, my mind always wandering o and thinking
about something other than what I was doing.
I lived most of my early life half here and half in my head, always feeling like I was
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half-asleep but never really knowing why. For this single reason, mindfulness would
have changed my life. But it just so happened that mindfulness would have a much
more signicant impact on me as time went on.
5. It will show you the path to true happiness
Most of us chase happiness thinking if we make a lot of money, nd our dream

partner, or attain great power well be set for life. The insights I received from my
mindfulness practice not only simplied life and showed me that everyone is
searching for happiness, just in countless dierent ways, but that true happiness is
inner peace.
In a state of inner peace, we still feel but are unmoved by lifes dicult challenges and
maintain a clear and ever-present calmness throughout life.
And when were not facing challenges, were able to clearly identify moments of peace
and joy and appreciate all thats around us, even something as simple as the beauty of
the blue sky.
You dont know it from the outside, but when you begin to practice you realize that
these simple moments are absolutely and totally fullling. Theyre the single most
profound moments of your life when you feel utterly at peace with everything around
you.
Of course, realizing true inner peace is easier said than done, but gaining clarity about
the path and seeing clearly how we get there is a huge step in the right direction. And
mindfulness helps us do that.

Pat
Lisenbee, Bachelor's degree in Human Services and 56 years of
lots of experiences.
Written Sun
i was born into a Christian family; they faithfully went to church and Wednesday
meeting, all revivals and special occasions. They read the bible every day at home and
prayed over every meal and at bedtime or when the occasion called for it.
Yet I was conicted. Even as a child I questioned everything and got punished for my
questions and was told to just have faith. But I required answers to questions like
why did god tell the Jews to kill everyone in the city, even babies and pregnant
women, just so they could live there? Why couldnt they learn to live in peace with the
people in the city? Because god said so, was the answer, and the spanking came.
Dont question gods word, I was told. But I continued to.
As a young adult I cried and read the bible and wept and tried to have faith and peace
of mind but none came. I was depressed and worse, suicidal, even with my children
around. (I found out much later I WAS clinically depressed, PTSD, Social Anxiety
Disorder, Manic Depressive and Agoraphobic. But that didnt come into play here). I
didnt t into any of the cliques the churches we attended had, no one would come
and talk with me after services were over. I quit attending sermons to teach the 3
year old class in the Southern Baptist church we were attending.
I was disturbed at the class material. It wanted me to teach THREE YEAR OLD
children things like Noah taking his family on the Ark and everyone else on Earth
died; David slung a rock at Goliath, a giant (arent all adults giants to 3 year olds?) and
knocked him down, and more? Then one day a horrible thing happened.
We were playing with playdough and had the tiny blue utensils out to play with it;
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spoons, forks and smooth-edged knives. A boy took a knife, turned to the girl beside
him, grabbed her hair, yanked back her head and pulled the knife across in a perfect
neck-slicing motion. The girl screamed in terror and pain; the class erupted in tears
and my helper freaked out.
I jumped over the table and snatched the boy up, throwing the knife across the room
and held him in a restraining hold with one arm while I examined and soothed the
girl. She had a red line on her throat, that was all. I yelled at the helper to start them
singing and took the boy in the bathroom and shut the door. There I sat him on my
lap and told him NO! No cutting people! Not nice! You dont cut people! he started
to cry, so I rocked him till he calmed down.
As the class had calmed, we put away the playdough and I sent my helper to slip into
the congregation and nd the parents and bring them up, I needed to see them right
away. While I waited I set the class coloring their lesson sheets. In that moment I
realized that all this religion was just bunk, plain and simple. In a few years, after
learning the lessons of David and Goliath, they would learn David cut o Goliaths
head. They would learn about the vicious, murdering god who ordered the death of
thousands as his Jews marched to the Promised land. They would learn about a
misogynist, unseen, unfelt, unheard being who contradicted himself in his own set of
books, how Eve was blamed for all the sin in the world so women were lesser and had
to obey men - what brainwashing! - how a king ordered the death of a man because he
slept with his wife and wanted her for his own, she got pregnant and the baby died in
punishment. Why punish a baby for the sins of the father? But that is one of the verses
in the bible. The sins of the father are visited on the children unto the 3rd and 4th
generations why? It made no sense anymore.
The parents arrived and I told them what happened and that I had to inform the
parents of the little girl too and they panicked. It was what they were afraid of. The
boys real father was in prison for murder, her husband now had adopted the child
and to try and prevent him from becoming like his father, they allowed him NO TV
except for one video tape the Life of Jesus. Suddenly I had a revelation about what
he was watching. I asked, did it have the scene where Peter cut o the ear of the
Roman ocer? They said yes, it did. That was where he got the idea, I knew. I told
them to stop the video immediately and go to the Christian book store. Buy him the
videos for little children. Then it was Charity Church-mouse and more like it, all
religious but geared for little children. They agreed to do that, took their son and
never came back to the church. The parents of the injured girl were angry and wanted
to confront the others but I talked them out of it; she only had a line on her neck. If
the knife had been serrated, it would have been much worse. In the name of peace in
the church, let it go. There would be no more knives when playing with playdough.
A deacons wife was informed and as I was cleaning the class she came and reamed
me for not following protocol on having a Deacon or wife present at the talk. I didnt
know of any such rule and said so, having never been informed so she could take her
nose out of my business. I handled it, it was done. I also told her to nd another
teacher for the class as I quit. She was startled, asked why and I said that was my
business too.
I left the church that day determined to get out as soon as I could. My faith in god was
gone - not that I really ever had it - my attempts at believing stopped. So did my
teaching the stories. I was stuck one more month while they coaxed someone to take
over; I taught being good and nice and sharing and playing nice together rather than
the bible lessons. They still colored their pages and sang the songs they could but
other than that, the class was not geared towards religion. Neither was I. That
moment when the boy cut the girls throat, all because of a religious video showed me
that my thoughts were right; this was a violent, bloody religion based on hatred, lies
and men who wanted to control a number of people by claiming god spoke to them.
When I nally left, it was after a Deacon, divorced Internet

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and remarried twice and a Deacon
who had child porn hidden in his bathroom (my son had come to me a week earlier
and told me hed accidently found it when looking for toilet paper in their bathroom;
the man was arrested the next day for raping his step-daughter and numerous counts
of child porn on his computer and in his possession) both told me that I was the cause
of sin in the church because my husband and I were getting a divorce. I told them o;
cursed them and the church and left my shoes in the church. I ipped the church the
bird, gave the sky a double and walked away singing Losing My Religion.
The insight I had that day in the childrens classroom led me to trying out being a
White Witch; while very good at it, it also required a god/dess and I didnt want to
have one, so I became an Atheist. When I started studying for it, I learned this was
what I had been searching for all my life! This was my purpose, my being. The peace I
always wanted was suddenly mine, the fear of Hell was gone and so was the empty
promise of a Heaven where you do nothing but stand around and sing praises to an
egotistical being. Even my son, at age 10 while in the church, told me after a funeral
that he didnt want to go to heaven because of that. He too is an Atheist and I couldnt
be more proud. He got there on his own. I love being an Atheist as my questions are
answered, Im always learning something new, and if the answer changes, I can
change with it. Thats the good thing about Science VS Religion. We can change as the
facts of our world change with more research; religion is bound to a 2,017 year old
book, at the least, that never changes, so they are stuck in the past. Too many of them
cannot change as the world does, although many have, which is good. If I were to go
back into religion, I would choose Episcopalian; it is the closest thing to what I might
be interested in. But Im not, so I wont. Goodbye religion forever in the year 1995.
Despite my mental health issues, my Atheism has helped me heal in many ways faster
and better than a lot in religion. HOORAY FOR ATHEISM!! Never will I ever go back to
a form of religion.
Amaro
Caldas
Araujo, had failing businesses and almost failing
relations and learned along the way
Written Jan 24
There are quite a few things I could name here, but as you ask for a single one I had to
think on what has been probably the most important insight that changed my life (or
the way I live).
Its not something conventional. Illumination, purpose, meaning, spirituality,

religion and son on and so forth, thou some or all of them had also played a role.
The one I want to highlight is the sense of security or control.
I was living my life on a way that was far too rational, logic and scientic based. And
by scientic based I mean I should have certitude, made a proper analysis and the
necessary pros/cons check.
I thought that clever people (as I assumed myself one) would be able to plan, prepare,
anticipate, design and as a result, LIFE WOULD BE A STRAIGHT LINE ACCORDING
TO MY PLAN.
I dont need to tell you how stupid that was, but for my surprise thats how far too
many people live their lives. Thinking they have it under control and it will be a very
straight line from A to Z according to their ambitions, dreams and desires.
You think youve planned everything, that you have all under control and suddenly
bummm shit hits the fan. You have an accident, your wife is cheating on you, your
company goes through reorganization and youre red, your startup goes down down
down and takes you down, a relative you loved and havent spoken for years as you
were so busy dies. You go through a divorce and have to sell your dream house.
Thats not being negative or pessimist, those are things that happen in real life, in
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everyday life.
Most of those things happen because were too busy guring out our life from A to Z
that we forget to live in the present and see the signs of warning.
So I start living in the present and accepting I cant control many of the things that
come my Way. But I can control how I respond.
There is more on this topic in my blog http://amaroaraujo.com/category/...

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Mark
Savchuk, Concerned citizen
When you are near death you realise how precious your life is. You begin to cherish
every second and you value your loved ones more, people like your parents and your
grand parents...
They will not be around forever. So don't waste your time on empty arguments and
don't waste your life.
It is a precious gift. Learn to appreciate it.

Adele
Kurtz, lived life "normally" for the rst half, now trying it
dierently...
Written Jan 27
Beware of the TRAPPINGS OF SUCCESS
they will bite you in the ass.
I, too, believed that I had reached the pinnacle of success by age 40. I worked hard to
develop a successful business, lived in a lovely home in a chic neighborhood with my
husband and three perfect kids, and we each drove around in shiny new cars.
Friends and family envied us. But we were living in a bubble that eventually burst. We
were always reaching a bit higher than we could aord. All this was encouraged by
willing creditors in a consumption-driven economy. We believed in our hearts
completely that we needed the new cars, ne clothes and beautiful home. Since we
worked so hard all week for this, 5060 hrs each, that meant that we deserved to go
out on Friday and Saturday nights to enjoy time with friends, and to take the kids to
fun places on weekends, buy a few toys and enjoy a nice vacation every year.
Everyone was doing it, why shouldnt we?
Bank of America and Citibank were pleased to give us more money, lowering interest
rates to encourage us, then raising them when we werent looking. Starting us o at 0
to 2.5% raising, slowly, to well over 20%. Sending us o with handshakes and pats
on the back.
You can see where this is headed. At the time we didnt.
After my husband and I reached the breaking point, the greater shock occurred when
it came time to divy up the assets. Although we thought we were making money and
spending wisely, in our 18 years together, we had only increased our indebtedness, to
the tune of roughly 10% more than we made every year. Our toys were worth nothing,
yet we still owed for them. And yet we were luckier than many. We got out before the
shit hit the fans in 2008. When I go back to visit friends from my old life, I see they are
still playing the consumption game; it makes me sad.
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Think about how much money you give to the banks, how much junk you buy that
you do not need, how much crap you ingest that is actually bad for you, how many
commercial messages you believe that drive you to demand and CONSUME: more,
More, MORE
99% of us are puppets in a Slave Economy.
There came a time when I just stopped doing it. I refused to participate. I earned
my freedom the moment I decided to become Debt Free.
My new choices led me to reconsider everything I was doing and ask WHY before I
spend a nickel on anything. I moved to a more aordable part of the country, away
from the high taxes of the cities. Away from the pressures to conform. I have swung
the pendulum the other direction, so that I earn far more from investments than I
spend every year. My entertainment is based on recreational outdoor activities far
healthier & less expensive in the long-run. I live modestly and well, play everyday as
my wealth and health keep growing.
Mikaela
Song, Trying to break free from societal norms
Life is all about the journey, not the destination. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
It sounds cliche but being a young and naive with full ambitions in life, Ive always
thought that happiness can only be achieved once I reached the destination.
Growing up, Ive always looked forward to all the end results in everything that I do.
Receiving quarterly grades in school, attending moving up ceremonies, winning
extra-curricular competitions, performing on stage, getting published, nishing high
school, passing entrance exams in college, building a good resume, graduating in
college, earning another degree and getting a job (that looks and sounds awesome).
I was too busy looking forward that I neglected all the journeys Ive been through. I
lost a lot of time. I lost opportunities to earn friends and strengthen my relationship
with my family during the foundation years of my life. The saddest thing is that I only
realised it when it was too late for me to catch up. Every one was too busy with their
own private lives, working their way up on their own careers, starting a family and
moving on to dierent places.
I can never go back in time but I can make the most of it with the remaining decades I
have left. Theres no point sulking over spilt milk. Now I start appreciating the
journey. Every second that pass, I make sure that its well thought of and well
appreciated. No matter how trivial or boring it may be.
Bash
Ashok, Computer Scientist, Parent and Teacher
There are two key insights that have inuenced my life. Both have to do with taking
things into our control. Whenever we take things into our control, we become
stronger and whenever we look to the outside for answers, we become weaker.
The rst insight is from Mahatma Gandhi. He said "Become the change that you want
to see in this world". Start with yourself instead of complaining about how bad things
are. If you don't like the garbage on the streets, start by cleaning the streets around
you and by generating less garbage. If you don't like people being miserable around
you, start by being cheerful yourself. If you don't like corruption, start by not
participating in corruption yourself. Following this gives you a lot of strength.
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Complaining about things that are not working makes you weak. "It is better to light a
candle than to curse the darkness" is another famous saying about this.
The second insight is that in life, there will always be situations that are unpleasant
and seemingly beyond our control. However how we choose to respond to them is
completely in our control. We change our internal reaction to a particular situation or
pattern in our life. When we change our reaction, the situation itself will slowly but
surely change into a more pleasant situation for us. First of all, we will not have the
emotional charge around the situation. Once that is xed, everything gets xed. The
pattern itself will eventually change.
Angie
Neik, Living an awesome life. Not a perfect one, but a fantastic
one.
People are rarely what they pretend to be.
I used to think that because I'm honest, all people are honest. Not so.
Skilled artists grow up believing, that everyone increases their artistic talent with age
and practice, just like they do. Not so.
Now I observe people carefully, noticing the incongruousness between their

words and their actions.
Words people say are what they want you to believe about them, actions show
who they really are. If those two are not aligned - red ag!
And that is an insight that changed my life.
Cheers!
Angie
Dan
Hansen, Pursuer of truth & knowledge.
Written Jan 11
My family had a business and my dad had me working at a very young age. When I
was 7, I made 7 cents an hour. When I was 8, I made 8 cents an hour - and I pretty
much just swept the oor and cleaned up the place.
The thing is that my dad would always inspect my work. I think he got this thing
about everything being perfect from when he was in the navy, but that became his
expectation of me and my brothers too.
One day while working, my dad called me up to his oce. It was a slow day and the
summer help (I was probably 12 and the summer hires were typically just out of
school or in college) didnt have much to do. So he asked me, what are you guys
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doing down there? I said, eh, not much. Kinda just standing around. WRONG
ANSWER (ha, ha). He said, Listen, you are my son and you have to set the example
down there for the other guys. I dont care if there is nothing to do, FIND something to
do. Pick up a broom and sweep. Or wash dishes, etc. Message received, dad!
And thats when my work ethic was born. Even so many decades later, the work ethic
is still alive and well and has paid o in my career. Except now I dont focus so much
on cleaning, but on how I can continuously improve and automate processes. I can go
all day every day without getting out of my chair (except to make a pit stop) because I
get so engrossed in what I do - and I love it. Thanks dad!!
Kousalya, Dear life....Surprise me! :)

A dream! :)
It was two days after I got a massive tantrum from my dad for taking quite a long bath
and wasting water lavishly. He dragged my hands forcibly to give a string and strong
advice that broke my ring nger. Yes! from that day onward Ive got a broken bend
ring nger. Even my dad never expected that I would go to this extent. I hated him
completely for the next two days. I decided not to give any space in the following
days.
One Sunday, I was in a deep sleep that took me to a very bad dream. The dream was: A
group of people carries my dad in a con. My mom, my sister and I cried so bad
on seeing that. One man from the group says that my dad met with an accident
and he died in the spot right away. I couldnt digest the dream and woke up
screaming Ilaaaappa ku onu aagala (No, nothing happened to dad). Tears
rolled from my eyes and my heart was in my mouth. For moments, I could believe it
was just a dream.
To prove that it was a dream, I got a call from my dad. Hesitatingly, I attended the call
with a hope that I should not get any bitter news about his health. I pressed the attend
button. He spoke in his sweet voice Ammadi. Appa peasuraen da! Kai epdi iruku?
(Dear, How are you and how is the pain?). I felt so relieved after hearing his sweet
voice & I totally forgot my injury he gave by mistake.
That minute I realized I can never hate my parents and that changed my life. :)
Thanks Sanjana Supriya for the question! :)

Brian
M.
Payne, Student of process
'That to live well one must have the ever present consciousness that this is a world of
fools and rouges; blind with superstition, tormented with envy, consumed with
vanity, selsh falsehoods, cursed with delusions, cruel, frothing mad.
Perhaps a severe doctrine, but there in lies the beginning of wisdom; and wisdom as
the ancients knew, is the beginning of happiness. Ambrose Bierce
Leonardo
Pergola
Chinese parable :
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An old man by the name of Chunglang, which means Main Rocks, had a small ranch
in the mountains. One day, he lost one of his horses. His neighbors expressed their
condolences for this misfortune. But the old man asked them: Why do you think that
is a misfortune?
And it came to pass that a few days later the animal returned, followed by an entire
herd of wild horses. Again the neighbors appeared, this time to congratulate him on
his good fortune. But the old man replied: Why do you think that is good fortune?
With so many horses to train, the son of the old man developed a passion for
horsemanship.But one beautiful day, he was thrown from a wild horse and he broke
his leg badly. Once again, the neighbors expressed their sympathy and again the old
man replied: Why do you think that is an unhappy accident?
The following year, an Imperial Commission arrived on the mountain. They had come
to recruit strong men to become footmen to carry the Emperors chair. The son of the
old man, lame from his broken leg, was not selected. Chunglang could not supress a
smile...
Manish
Tripathi
1.Most of the pain and negativity occurs because of brain that fools us constantly by
leading us to believe problems that either do not exist or by a restricted interpretation
of past...if you can deceive your mind, most of the negativity will get weed out..from
then on the game of deceiving the almighty brain is on.
2.No matter how bad condition you are in, There would be someone in even worse
condition smiling amidst his diculties.
3.1 life spent smiling is better than 100 life spent thinking about problems.
4.And the Epic saying from Bhagvad Gita : "whatever happenedin past,it happened
for good, Whatever is happening, is happening for good,whatever will happen, will
also happen for good"
Also, A session in palliative care where i had to talk to patients suering from
terminal disease was quite a life changing event.They knew they have very less time
left and may be this fact had relieved them of all their pains.The innocence in their
eyes and love for the every moment left is something i don't see in day to day life.
Amy
B
Reineri, Architectural problem solver
Written Jan 8, 2013
I would say it was the idea that when you are gone, you will wish you had had at least
an hour/day/year more in this life. And in that hour/day/year, no one has "worked
longer hours." So, spend most of your time enjoying what you have and almost
nothing worrying about getting more. I worked with people in Chicago in the late 80s
who thought that working 18 hours a day, charging little of it to the company, would
spare them from layos. Nope, they got laid o also. There comes a point where a
certain company, career or project is sucking the life blood out of you, the cut-o from
that kind of problem is well before it reaches that level. Life is a negotiation between
what is required and what is desired - try to line the two up if you can, so they are the
same. If you cannot do that, then be sure you are feeding both... and giving the best
to what you desire.
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Anand, Simplied
'So what' attitude!
Asking question 'so what?' continuously until you calm down, really helps to change
our reactions to unpleasant, unwanted things that happens everyday. It can help you
to ignore unwanted troubles by having a logical response rather than futile
aggression, 'ght or ight' response, involving in unproductive ghts, cursing
etc etc.
Here is an example of how natural (automatic) self-talk along with applied (forced)
'so what' conversation that can go inside our mind when some irresponsible fellow
make troubles in trac during rush hour by not following rules. This scene could
have ended in a ght, cursing, angry discussions etc. But with 'so what' applied
thoughts, it ended with a big smile on the face!!
Automatic thought: Look at this irresponsible fellow. Rushing his car wildly and
troubling everyone else. How can this people be so harsh, cruel, irresponsible? They
are pathetic! These people should be punished hard.
(Heart breathing fast! Clenching jaws! Anger in mind!! Feeling heat on face, backside
of ear etc!)
Applied thought: So what? (What exactly is the problem if someone really breaks the
trac rule and troubles everyone else?).
Automatic thought: This causes troubles, delays to everyone else who follow the
trac rules. It leads to frustrations. This is not good. Everyone is supposed to follow
trac rules. This person is NOT following the rules.
Applied thought: So what? (What will happen if I get delayed in trac one day?).
Automatic thought: This will make all my day schedule horrible derailed. I will be
late to the rst meeting, then will miss few things later. I may miss some of the stu in
oce.)
Applied thought: So what? (What will happen if I reach late to a scheduled meeting
in oce?).
Automatic thought: This will create bad impression about me in oce. They will
think I am always late. This will happen despite I started on time and no fault of mine.
All this is because of this useless fellow.
Applied thought: So what? (What will happen if I am getting troubles for someone
else fault?).
(By now mind started accepting the getting delayed, getting troubles for other
people's mistakes etc and started soothing. It also started avoiding getting involved in
aggression, discussions, ights, cursing with that person)
Automatic thought: That's the problem. This is how life is. We get punished for
someone else fault. Life is not fair.
Applied thought: So what? (What if life is not fair?)
Automatic thought: Life is not fair and hardly I can do anything about it. There are
lot of things out of my control.
(By now heart rate started waning down, heat started dissipating, mind relaxing, I
could hear music in the car instead of cacophony of trac)
Applied thought: So what? (What if there are many thing that I can't control).
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Automatic thought: Then I have to accept it. Let it be.
Applied thought: So what? (What if I have to accept such unwanted things?)
Automatic thought: Let me accept it gracefully instead of reluctantly accepting it.
Applied thought: So what? (How to do this?)
Automatic thought: Put a smile on face and ignore that person, listen to music in the
car!!
:) :)
Barbara
Carleton, Survivor
HAMLET
A man may sh with the worm that hath eat of a king, and eat of the sh that hath fed
of that worm.
30 CLAUDIUS
What dost you mean by this?
HAMLET
Nothing but to show you how a king may go a progress through the guts of a beggar.
Susan
Chun, Journalist | Lawyer | Consultant
Written Jan 27
Heres the advice Id give to the younger versions of me:
Without action, the story dies.
Whether its the story of your career, or the story of your life, youve got to take some
action, be an active agent in the story of you, to move the narrative forward Or else
the story dies.
It almost doesnt even matter what that action is, whether its the right one or not.
You could spend decades debating wrong and rightyou have. The crucial thing
is to do something. Anything. Because even a wrong action will move the story
forward.
And when you do, you plot another uncharted point, add another dot to the map of
your life. One dot will lead you to another. Then another. And another.
While youre doing that, take to heart the wisdom of Steve Jobs when he said this:
[I]t was impossible to connect the dots looking forward.But it was very, very
clear looking backward.[Y]ou can only connect them looking backward. So you
have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in
something your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let
me down, and it has made all the dierence in my life.
And remember this quote by Pablo Picasso. Keep it close and dear, because it is
everything:
To know what youre going to draw, you have to begin drawing.
This is your life. You get exactly one. So get drawing.
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Ari
Kozuchi
Written Aug 9
Be grateful for what you have, because chances are, theres someone out there
who needs it more than you want it.
When I went on a trip to the Philippines, my family ran a private food donation to
families in the mountain who dont have access to general supermarkets or the city,
for that matter.
At each village we stopped by, hundreds and hundreds of children, men, and women
would ock to our cars to receive the food. They didnt, however, swarm our car and
try to take it from us. Instead, they neatly lined up along the side of the road and
patiently waited their turn to get what they needed.
I wish I had pictures, but we decided not to take them out of respect.
What really shook me to the core was seeing kids who wore only undergarments
(some, not at all), their bodies so skinny I could count their bones. Their feet were
bare and blistered, their skin dirted with mud. And yet, looking into their eyes, I could
see what I can only describe as hope. Watching their adorable faces light up as they
received their bags of food melted my heart.
What was in those bags was common supermarket food: Bread, canned sh, bottled
water, etc. for the adults, and little snacks for the kids. I could easily go out and
purchase those snacks for ten pesos (which converts to fty cents) at my leisure, but
they had never tried such food in their lives.
Also, we gave them all slippers. Like I mentioned, almost all of the children were
barefoot, and the adults who werent had slippers that were just barely hanging onto
their feet.
Seeing the smiles on the kids' and parents' faces when they received their food and
slippers made me realize that I have more at my disposal than they have on a daily
basis. It also makes me realize that life isn't just about doing things for yourself. I
think its possible to live your life in a way that makes other people around you happy,
too.
Tanvi
Mainkar, Take a leap of faith
After achieving everything that I always wanted, attaining things which I had thought
were essential for my happiness, I still wasn't happy.
It made me rethink my entire perception of happiness.
Wendy
Ren, Chinese/ depression/ feel like a loser
Don't judge people.

This is the most thing in my life.
I think most of human being love judge. We like to say some people is bad, and others
is good. Though we don't know if we're right. In my country, people be judged all the
time. If you don't want to married and have a baby, must regret and die alone. If you
are a gay, faggy. If you are not go to college, bad student. If you don't study science in
college, idiot. If you are not a student in 211 or 985 university, stupid and lazy. If you
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learn Chinese in college, ridiculous. If you're not successful (have a lot of money),
loser. If you're fat, ugly pig. Something like this. I don't mean those judge thing never
happened in other countries. I believe things like that happen all around. I just knew
my country better, so I make a example.
I was a person like judge people too. In our culture, older people must be better than
younger people. We heard those words all the time: "you must be take my suggestions,
cause I am older than you. My knowledge is more than yours. " When I was younger, I
be judged by someone older. And I judge person who younger than me.
One day, I told some people that perhaps some day, I will be a single mom. They try to
clean my brain and "teach" me what exactly I should do. I just told them that I am
thinking. I don't want to they do same thing. But they blame me because I am "too
young too simple, sometimes naive". And funny thing is, some of them only older
than me one or two years. They say I should grow up. Then, I released I hate those
thing. It break my heart. No one have right to tell people what should they do, even
they are 100 years old. I understood that's their feelings who be judged by me. How
they are gutted and how they're sad. I feel very sorry. They would hate me like I hate
people older than me.
Don't judge isn't a easy thing. I can't help myself to be a teacher sometimes. But the
good thing is, I know it's bad now. And I am trying to get rid of it.
Raj
Malhotra, Wants to travel the whole world
The movie "Fight Club" and this particular monologue:
Man, I see in ght club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this
potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas,
waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes,
working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of
history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our
Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised
on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and
rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very
pissed o.
Edward
Bauman, pragmatist
Written Sun
For me, there is no single incident or epiphany, but rather a slow realization over time
that as a pragmatist I had the ability to acquire and develop the two most important
aspects of being an intelligent person: enlightenment and wisdom. Not anything
spiritual, mind you, just seeing things for what they are. Nothing makes decisions,
choices and perceptions more realistic and eective than knowing what is what in
terms of people, circumstance and reality.
This, combined with the ability to compartmentalize, really is the gift that keeps on
giving. Looking back, I realize that people would come to me with problems or issues,
and i really didnt understand why. I eventually realized that what I took for granted
they didnt have or couldnt do. In many ways, life is about solving all kinds of
problems of varying importance. Some learn from this, others do not and keep
making the same mistakes in life.
Pragmatism is really about the search for truth, which is more important than ever in
a time when untruth and alternative facts are all too common. Truth is being aware
and enlightened, seeing things for what they are, and then dealing with whatever that
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is. If only isnt going to work. Compartmentalizing helps separate various aspects so
that the best choice under the circumstance becomes obvious. Thats how eective
problem-solving gets done.
Eclectic Pragmatist Eclectic Pragmatist
Eclectic Pragmatist Eclectic Pragmatism Medium

Jay
Bazzinotti, Nothing good happens by itself -- you have to make it
happen.
Updated Mar 16, 2016 Featured in Observer and Thought Catalog
In 1986 I met the man who would have the most impact on my life of anyone I have
ever met. His name was Bill B. He was a salesman at our company, in fact, he was the
number one salesman. He was six feet four, built like a hero and had aming red hair
and green eyes. He always dressed professionally and never once did I see him with
his tie loosened, no matter how late we were working on a proposal. The most he
would do was roll up the sleeves of his crisp, white shirt. And everywhere he went he
strode in like he owned the place. Everyone stepped out of his way and listened
carefully to everything he said. And he was always smiling and friendly, to the
president, to me and to the girl behind the counter serving Salisbury Steak in the
company cafeteria. He had the best attitude of anyone I have ever met. When asked
how he was doing, his answer was always the same -- "I have never been better". And
he meant it.
And then one day he received some horrible news about one of his children. After
that, he was out of work for awhile, but when he returned he strode into the building
with his briefcase in hand, his tie tight up against his neck and a huge smile on his
face. I considered myself a close personal friend of his since we worked so closely
together, but then, everyone wanted to be his friend. So out of concern I went to his
oce that morning and closed the door.
"How are you doing," I asked, "How are you REALLY doing? Is there anything I can do
for you? I mean it, anything, just ask."
And he said to me with a grin, "You know, I've never been better," and then he
shucked his empty Dunkin Donuts coee cup into the trash can across the room. I
stood there silently for a second.
"How?" I said at last, "How can you possibly be that positive? How can it be that
you've never been better?"
The smile faltered and slipped from his face. Then he leaned forward and pointed his
nger at me. He was actually angry. I had never seen him angry. I just wanted to turn
and run away. If I had made him my enemy I might as well give my notice and walk
out right there.
"Now you listen to me," he said softly and I held my breath, "You listen to me. You
don't know jack shit about me or my life. You only think you do. I am going to tell you
something and you better goddam remember it. Your attitude sucks. I'm surprised
they tolerate it here. I sure as hell wouldn't. Your attitude is everything. It makes your
life. You think things are bad? Well let me tell you something, pally, they could be a lot
fucking worse. A lot worse. You're standing there in your shirt and cheap tie and
you're pissed because you didn't get your way in some meeting? Well get out there
and start digging sewers and tell me how much that meeting meant today. And maybe
after digging sewers you get laid o and nd yourself living in one and eating from a
dumpster. You don't know shit. I'm telling you this, this one time, and I will never
speak about it again ever, so you better listen up hard, buddy. When someone asks
you how you are doing there is only ONE answer. That answer is 'I've never been
better.' And you live your life as if it's true because I am telling you this lead pipe truth
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-- no matter how bad you think it is right now -- it can ALWAYS be worse. Much worse.
So wake up and change your attitude. Right fucking now."
And then he leaned back in his chair and smiled as if nothing had happened. I stood
there in dead silence. Huge moons of sweat had formed on my shirt under my
armpits.
"I need more coee," he said happily, "I'm going for coee. You want to come and keep
me company? My treat! Sales always buys the fucking donuts!"
And we went to the Dunkin Donuts and got coee in his new Jaguar. It was as if
nothing had changed with him. Everything had changed with me. I found I couldn't
do what he requested at my job. So I quit and went to another company. I was
terried. I had been at the old company for almost ten years. Moving to a new
company was a huge change. When I walked into the reception area the receptionist
smiled and asked me how I was doing.
"I've never been better," I said with a huge smile on my face.
"Well that's a great attitude," she said, beaming, "You'll t right in here if you can keep
that up!"
And so it went. I became the most chipper, upbeat person in the company. I was both
the butt of jokes and the darling of the downtrodden. I didn't realize it but I had
moved to a company on the verge of disaster but as things got worse my attitude got
noticed more and more. I was promoted quickly, despite knowing nothing about the
technology. Layos came, then more layos and more. I made it through every single
one despite being the junior guy. I asked my boss how this could be so.
"Well," he said, "We were in a meeting where we were discussing who would be laid o
this round. Your name always comes to the top. You're green and have no time in
service. You're the logical choice. But when we discuss it, everyone decides you
should stay. Your attitude is so positive that everyone wants you here. The president
says he'd rather have one mediocre employee with a great attitude than ve dour
experts. Attitude sells. You don't have to worry -- you'll be here after I'm gone, til they
turn out the lights, if you want to be."
And so it was. As things got worse, I got promoted faster. Within 18 months I was the
senior man in the division. I became the point man for the company's turnaround,
which was impossible. And when things nally got worse, my old boss called me and
oered me a job. I walked out that day.
As a result of that experience I came up with a list of three priorities every employee
must have to be successful at work. I have written them up and pasted them on my
wall in every company I have worked in since and many people have copied them. I
will put them here:
Having been in the business world a very long time I will tell you what your priorities
are:
To your boss: your number one priority is to make your boss look good. I am not joking.
To your company: Your Number One priority is to increase revenue. Number Two is to
improve protability. These two priorities should guide all your thinking and actions.
To yourself: your number one priority is to always, without exception, maintain a

positive attitude, positive self condence and the appearance of success.
The third item is for your career and your life and no single thing you can do, no amount
of education, no amount of expertise or knowledge is more important. An employee with
average skills and a good attitude is worth more than 5 dour experts. As the pilots say,
'your attitude determines your altitude' and you must maintain a positive attitude at
ALL COSTS and you WILL be successful, as day follows the night. You cannot fail.
Since then I have tried to apply those priorities. Where I have succeeded it has lead to
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great success. Where I have failed it has lead to failure and misery. Attitude is the
number one determinant of your success in life. You must always portray a positive
attitude, no matter what. Because it's true -- no matter how bad you think things are
at this moment, they could ALWAYS BE WORSE. And your attitude determines how
that is going to go.
If there were one single thing I could impart to anyone starting out, anyone at
whatever point in their life it would be to always portray a positive attitude. It is the
most powerful thing in the universe.
Upvote 14k Downvote Comments 215+
Santosh
Nistala, Political observer,believes in grey, isolated bubbled,
sportsman,aspiring writer
Written Apr 8, 2016
A couple of things changed my approach towards life.
1. A regional (Telugu) movie 'Chirunavvutho'.
2. Two lines.
i. 'To each his own'.
ii. Compete and compare with privious u and not with others.
The movie taught me to appreciate myself as I am. The lead role of the movie is a
bluntly honest guy who wouldn't mince his words regardless of the person he deals
with. All he cares if he's being honest to himself or not. He wouldn't worry about
being rejected and doesn't give a damn about something he can't control. Appreciates
reality and comes in terms with it. He's alien to the word 'jealousy'. Believes in
himself and doesn't include luck, hope and someone's mercy in his plans. The movie
has a profound inuence on my life and should there be a tricky situation, I would
think in his lines and mostly, I end up doing something I shall not regret. No qualms
in admitting that the movie pretty much changed my life for good.
To each his own.:
The line 'to each his own' helped me acknowledging the existence of various mindsets
around us. Not everyone can think like me and I don't have to approve everyone's
views. An individual is free to do what he wants as long as he's not inconveniencing
someone. Once you embrace this attitude, u r immune to the trouble of someone's
weirdness. If u value someone in ur life, start thinking from his/her viewpoint on the
issue at hand and if u can adjust ur approach accordingly, things mostly end up on a
better note.
Compete and compare with ur previous u not with others.:
I used to be foolish to compare my life with someone else's. That's the most stupidest
thing I have ever done in my life which in fact makes me laugh when I come to think
of it. I was oblivious to the cardinal principle of life that people's lives, circumstances
and thought processes etc WILL be dierent. There's a very little point in being
jealous of someone's privileges. It's in fact a loser's attitude. Again, a dialogue in a
movie which says, "The best thing out parents gave us is a healthy body and a
functioning mind. The one who blames them for not giving enough money is an
absolute loser". That made a lot of sense. Compete in life but never try to compete
with someone other than urself. Just try to better ur previous u.
The above mentioned philosophies been working ne for me so far. :)

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Abdulrahman
AlZanki, I like making apps
"As long as you learned something from the mistake, don't call it a mistake" ~ My
Brother
"The only dierence between wise people and the rest is that wise people learn from
every problem they face in life" ~ My Teacher(1)
"Money comes and goes, knowledge stays forever" ~ My Teacher(2)

Chris
Herd, I've lived, failed and learned a lot of lessons
Failure is the Key to Future Success
I realise that may sound counter-intuitive or juxtaposed to the conventional wisdom

of rationality but failure is almost always the only constant that can be conclusively
witnessed as a precursor when taking a broad overview of histories paradigm shifts,
evolution of product or introduction of new ways of thinking. Failure is almost the
only endeavour which consistently leads to success, growth and advancement, it is
the string which links each while they develop independently evolving towards
success.
As is customary during my annual leave I am aorded the opportunity to read the

books I have hoarded and been unable to get through. This year was thankfully no
dierent. The topics covered were wide and diverse (for those interested the books
can be found here: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] ) but the one lineage of
thought that manifested itself throughout each text related to the ubiquitousness of
failure as a forerunner to success.
It is without question in my mind the most important of all evolutionary behaviour,

so deeply engrained within each of us that it is present in every decision we
consciously or subconsciously make from the moment we are born. Think back to the
rst time you burnt your ngers on an open ame, fell from a height and hurt
yourself or further still to those precocious moments where you fell before you found
your feet to walk those rst uncertain steps. The underlying principle of each is
exploration and learning from failure. I would argue that it is the single most
important feature that we have evolved; to learn from failure while simultaneously
utilising our intelligence to redevelop theories for future success.
What fascinates me most then is why some people have this in abundance, an
unwavering commitment to success which is only inspired by failure, while others
lose this willingness or become scared to experiment. Somewhere on their journey,
they developed an aversion to failure which suppresses the opportunity to learn and
detrimentally aects their future prospects. Was it at work where they were
conditioned to fear it as a reason for dismissal or was it at home where it was
criticised out of them by parents? The truth is how or where it occurred is less
important that recognition of the fact it did. Some people will continue along this
route of cognitive dissonance for a lifetime purposefully ignorant of and unwilling to
learn the lessons of failure due to fear of the pain incurred by admitting the hurtful
truth of their shortcomings.
Recognition, realisation or admittance of an error when it has occurred then is the

essential necessity of enabling future successes to occur. Identifying an error when it
occurs allows you to break free of closed loop failure leading to new potential
solutions. As it transpires then our biggest failure is a failure to recognise and act on it
by nding a solution. Our biggest obstacle to success isnt failure but ourselves and
our inability to admit to them. Failure can only be tackled if it is rst understood and
we are cognisant of it. Instead of fearing failure weInternet
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must recognise and embrace it as a
creative spark which has merely ruled out one possibility while enlightening us to the
potential of alternative routes.
Embracing failure as a part of the process which leads to achieving unprecedented

success is dicult. It is even more challenging to ignore the noise that accompanies
repeated failure. The constant chatter, criticism and insults can be paralysing.
Overlooking this derision and ghting your way to success is the only way you can
achieve anything of signicance.
Success and failure are inexplicably linked. Successful failure can be measured in
actions and what you have learned whereas failure without action leaves the
possibility of regret. If you want to fear something I would strongly recommend you
concentrate it on failure to try. I can openly confess Im afraid to fail, but I am for
more afraid that I will fail to accomplish anything of signicance. Failure is not a sign
that your ideas are doomed but is a necessary step toward success.
If at rst you dont succeed, youll know youre aiming high enough.
The simple truth is if you havent failed you havent tried hard enough or risked
enough in your pursuit of achievement. You have not dreamed the dream or pursued
ascertainment of the unthinkable. Only when you do this do you open yourself up to
the possibility of dramatic and unprecedented success. If you haven't failed you
havent really lived. Failure is the badge of honour I wear visibly as scars on my skin
and invisibly in my heart every single day. It is what has inspired my evolution to
become who I am today and is the kindling which ensures the unmerciful re burning
within implores me to unmercifully hunt success, progress and attainment of every
single goal I have ever set.
You dont just have to take my word for it:
Bill Gates : Gates wasn't a guarantee of success after dropping out of university and
starting a failed rst business with Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen called Traf-O-
Data. While this early idea didn't work, Gates' later work did and with what he learned
from failure leading to the creation of the global empire that is Microsoft.
Walt Disney : Today Disney rakes in billions from merchandise, movies and theme
parks around the world, but Walt had a rough start. He was red by a newspaper
editor because "he lacked imagination and had no good ideas." After that, Disney
started a number of businesses that didn't last too long and ended with bankruptcy
and failure. He kept plugging along, however, and eventually found a recipe for
success that worked.
Albert Einstein : When most of us hear Einstein's name we immediately think

genius, but he didn't always show such promise. Einstein did not speak until he was
four and did not read until he was seven, causing his teachers and parents to think he
was mentally handicapped, slow and anti-social. Eventually, he was expelled from
school and was refused admittance to the Zurich Polytechnic School. It might have
taken him a bit longer, but most people would agree that he caught on pretty well, in
the end, winning the Nobel Prize and changing the face of modern physics.
Vincent Van Gogh : During his lifetime, Van Gogh sold only one painting, and this
was to a friend and only for a very small amount of money. While Van Gogh was never
a success during his life, he plugged on with painting, sometimes starving to
complete his over 800 known works. Today, they bring in hundreds of millions.
J. K. Rowling : Rowling may be rich beyond comprehension on the back of Harry

Potter today, but before she published the series of novels she was nearly penniless,
severely depressed, divorced, trying to raise a child on her own while attending
school and writing a novel. Rowling went from depending on welfare to survive to
being one of the richest women in the world in a span of only ve years through her
hard work and determination.
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Studies show the distance between those who achieve greatness and those who fall
short is much closer than we think. Both groups actually fail at the same % of
attempts the only dierence is volume. Those who achieve greatness make far more
attempts, fail far more often and ascend to those heights by aording themselves far
more opportunity to learn from their mistakes and put it right.
Therein lies the rub. Mindless, ignorant and unconsidered failure that you don't learn
from is useless. It hijacks your psychological progress and deters you from trying
again. To succeed you need to ignore everything else and focus on the process of
learning from your mistakes.
Don't just fail more, crucially you have to fail smarter and allow yourself the
opportunity to achieve greatness. Your legacy depends on it.
If you liked this answer, it would mean a lot to me if you upvoted! Want more like this?
Follow me on Medium ,Twitter or Facebook .
Bhanupriya
Jayaraj, I am pretty good at it :)
My life has been quite insightful. It's not a single one that made the dierence, it's the
collection of them but still I will try to put all of it in one sentence. " Death is scary but
so is life. Every person you have known has been or is going through something very
painful in his/her life which no one can ever understand. We need each other. We
need more love, happiness and less judgment."
The one person whose coming into my life made this insight even more clear is my
friend 'Pinki'. She is 20years old. We met during our treatment of cancer. While mine
was treatable, hers was not. So, she was sent back to home. The last time I talked with
her in person this was what she said " Now that I know how much my family loves me,
I want to live some more". Thinking everyday of her inching towards death makes me
humble and grateful for what I have. This is the one picture I have of her :
I have seen people happy, I have seen them cry, I have seen them laughing, I have
seen them being hopeless... It's a roller coaster ride you know. Just the moment we
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think we have gured it all out, a simple question pops up in our heads and then
again we wonder as to where we are heading! And so for me it's simple, we all are in
this together. We have to love each other ercely (includes everything around you),
tell jokes and move along happily. There's no bigger destiny, all we have is now, The
Present! Let's smile and spread some :)
P. S. Everytime you feel hopeless or are hung upon something avoidable remember
there's someone out there wishing they had some more days.
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S
Bhrdwj, Student of Life
I was the horse...

The chair was 'what will people say?'
Sometimes the blocks which hold us back are merely in our perception.
Sometimes we think we are so strongly tethered to the social norms that we are scared to
even try breaking free.
So, I tried a tact of reverse psychology... I may not be able to break free, but the society
denitely needs a break from a rebel like me!!! ;))
Hence, I try this anti-thought everytime...

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Life has never been better!

Peace
Jessica
Skinner, Learnt how to live, all by myself
Holding anger is like a holding a hot coal, you intend to throw it at someone else
but only end up burning yourself.
Wording is probably incorrect but that's as I remember it. It has stayed with me for
some years now and really resonated with me when I read it as I was extremely
depressed and angry at the time. I was in a bad relationship and I felt so much angry
towards my partner, I felt exactly this way, like I wanted to hurt him. But to realise
that I was only hurting myself was completely life-changing! I'll never forget this
teaching.
I think it is a teaching of Buddha, possibly repeated by the Dalai Lama

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Anonymous
Be careful of your thoughts, for your thoughts become your words.

Be careful of your words, for your words become your actions.
Be careful of your actions, for your actions become your habits.
Be careful of your habits, for your habits become your character.
Be careful of your character, for your character becomes your destiny.
Venkat
Mallya, Serial Entrepreneur
There is lot of pain out there. See how many lives you can touch. Make a dierence.
Start with one.
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More and more you give, more you get, to give. Giving is Gods act. You are a mere
conduit. I found this teaching in every holy book including Gita, Bible and Kuran.
Rest of the religion is human manipulation/exploitation for money and power.
Anything you do, do it well. Otherwise don't do it for the sake of it.
Aaron
Force, The Force is strong with this one | Inuence, Impact,
Innovation
Written Jan 18
My best friend revealed a great, life-changing insight to me recently. His name is

Mario and he is a sweet Beagle that I've had for about seven years.
Mario wouldn't hurt a ea, he is that kind. In fact, his greatest crime in life is getting
in to the garbage every time we take our eyes o him. I recently forced a solution for
that, though, by building a trash bin so now he really is just about as perfect of a dog
as a person could ever want.
But, life hasn't been too kind to Mario recently.
He has a baseball-size tumor on the side of his hind leg and many more are starting to
form all over his body. Our vet conrmed these are cancer and that Mario's days are
closing to an end.
A couple of weeks ago, I let Mario out to do his business and I stood at my sliding glass
door waiting for him to get done. I impatiently peered through the rain drops rolling
down the glass. I had work to get back to and I wanted him to hurry and come back in
so I could sit down and get back to it.
Could you imagine being in your bathroom and somebody staring at you and calling
your name for you to be done?
My son, Trevor, asked, "Dad, hes dying. Why don't you just let him roam around and
enjoy it outside for a little bit?" He gets irritated easily with me sometimes.
I said, "Trev, I have things to do and I don't want to sit down just to have to get back up
in 4 or 5 minutes when he is nally done sning everything and, besides, it's raining
and I don't want him to come back in the house all wet." I thought I justied myself
pretty well.
I did feel a little bad afterwards, though, because I realized Trevor was right. A dog,
especially in his last days, should just be allowed to be a dog.
A few days later, I had a chance to redeem myself. And, it was raining good outside
this time. I let him out, I closed the sliding glass door, he did his business, and he
slowly strolled aimlessly around the back yard. He stopped to sni anything and
everything and spent nearly ten minutes outside just doing his thing. He did what
dogs do.
He felt the wet grass under his paws, he smelt the scents of other animals that had
crossed our yard, he took in raw, cold air, he felt the cool breeze and falling rain that
might have otherwise annoyed me. Except, that I felt that I could have enjoyed all
those same things in that moment.
In fact, I felt that if I was in my own last days that I would actually want to feel the
rain falling on me. I could imagine that I would want to experience cold air because I
might not ever be able to again. I would love to feel the cold, wet grass under my feet.
Life is about experiences, good or bad, comfortable or not. It is meant to be taken in
with all of ones senses and without complaint. Animals know this. And, there are a
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very few, rare people who do as well.
It must have been an insight triggered by his impending death. That we civilized
creatures encase ourselves in rules and borders, signied by the very walls we live in.
We have 9-to-5 jobs and our roads have two lines to keep our cars between. We
separate ourselves from re, earth, water, and wind- the basic elements of our
environment. And, we compartmentalize everything, even separating life from death.
For primals like Mario, on the other hand, there is no good or bad, there just "is." Life
is experienced in all of it's aspects, without judgment or critique. Wet feet, wet backs,
cold air- that was just Mario's experience at the moment and another day will be
dierent- warm grass to roll in, gentle breezes, Dandelions to smell. No matter what
the weather or the conditions, it doesn't aect his outlook of life. And, to a primal
creature, death isn't separated from life, it's just another state of being and there is no
distinction.
Could you imagine what life would be like if the people around you didn't complain
about the weather, or their home life, or the lack of shows on tv- they just experienced
the grandness of life no matter what it brought them? Could you imagine how much
better your life could be if there were no unspoken rules and expectations of how life
should be versus how it is? Or, that death isn't something to be feared but embraced
as another inclusive part of our existence?
This is my major insight and it only just recently happened. Ive yet to see its impact
pass the test of time. There are a lot of distractions in life, after all, and its easy to get
caught up in all the traps of a critical outlook. But, so far, I have had a greater peace
with life, have not been so concerned about walking in the rain, or feeling the freezing
cold of Winter, or losing people I care about to cancer and other diseases. Life just is
and I try to embrace it as such.
Herein lies my challenge for you: to live primally, as though you knew you could cross
into death at any time; to experience life without layers of safety, categories,
boundaries, or expectations. To be one with life. To not put labels on it. To live life a
little bit primal.
Vipul
Gaur, I get paid for tapping on keyboards.
This hit me once when I was pondering alone in my hostel...
Its very simple to point out others' mistakes and criticize them. Never criticize, never
be judgemental.
Learn to accept your mistakes and situations where you were wrong. Don't always try
to prove you were right without thinking about it.
And never be afraid to move away from the crowd and do something dierent! Do
what you really want to do and what you love with all your energy.
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Sabyasachi
Patel, Biomedical Engineer
I always wonder why birds choose to stay in the same place when they can y
anywhere on the earth, then I ask myself the same question. - Harun Yahya
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is to attempt to get it. You are free
to pursue whatever you want. Fly.
Claire
Lo, just being herself.
"You are how your experiences shape you, the company you choose to be in and your
own willingness to learn."
Ray
Zinn, former CEO at Micrel (1978-2015)
Written Wed
I went blind mere days before the company I founded had its IPO (for the full story,
and some other insights into survival, leadership and business, see Tough Things
First ).
The blindness did not teach an immediate lesson. But as I adapted (learned to
memorize everything, deployed technology to help, etc.) I discovered that people are
gracious, giving and helpful. I knew this from lessons of my youth, but experienced it
in the raw after my eyesight failed.
Knowing that the vast majority of people are helpful gives one a dierent perspective
on life, business, politics and mankind.
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Ari
Ginsberg, Success Facilitator - NLP Life Training Dr Richard Bandler
That my behaviour and thoughts in my life eect, what I experience and the
feedback, I get back, from my world.
My question focuses me towards a particular focused answer, so are you asking

questions which are for example, " how can I be happy and at peace?", or are you
asking questions like, "why am I unhappy and unsatised?"
Which question will lead you to nding problems and which question will lead to
nding solutions?
If you require any further information please feel free to contact me at

Ari@successfacilitator.org .
110 Views Answer requested by Brian Brave
Amitvikram
Dutta, Living it for 24 years
I stopped trying to gure out why I wasn't as good the people around me and
concentrated on trying to become the best me I could be.
Priyanshu
Gupta, I love to study Fear.
Written Sep 25, 2014
That in life, very few people really care about you. And that's a really good thing,
since you can get away with a lot of things. Internet
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Because of this, there is no reason, to not be the person you really want to be.
James
Keller, works at Retirement
Written Oct 27
The fact I had ( good) insight caused me to question the most simplest of things ,
mostly relating to Normal Human behavior and what are the except norms . Also
general physics questions that seem innocent , almost naive , like the shapes of
atoms or nature of photons motion threw space .What I have learned is we still dont
know or we know alot but not everything there is to know about any given subject , So
the you can never know everything about any one thing , Im using one thing very
loosely. I have to accept the fact that all thing are not knowable , give our current level
of mental development . But maybe we dont have to know all the mystery just most
of them and what we cant seem to understand maybe because
There IS nothing to understand , Im not sure if that make seances ?
What is the single insight that most changed your life?
That Man is a predatory animal and will dominate EVERYTHING or KILL

EVERYTHING TRYING DO THE SAME. OUR DAYS ARE NUMBERED.
REJOICE AND APPRECIATE THE PRESENT.
I may delete this if it sounds irreverent I welcome comments and criticism

270 Views
Anant
Jain, Life is all about experiences. I am here to learn from others
and share mine.
It's really an irony that one statement bounds you to understand reality of life. Here's
what has made me to change REALLY change my perspective towards myself, not
much fancy but worth reading I feel:
An aspiring actor at my workplace shared few minutes of his time with me a few
hours ago. We were discussing on the GYM membership which I was asking to him. I
did joined, but not continuing it any more. On this what next he said completely
changed my way of analysing my inability. Here are his words:
It's nothing like laziness or inability, GYM is a life style. When one prefer to start
GYM, they actually selects a life style for them. Once you are fully in agreement to
change the Life style, results do come. It has nothing to do with what you are now,
it is there to make you what you now want to be.
This words stroke my mind and heart at the very moment.
No I didn't pledged myself that I will get my ass tomorrow morning and dedicate myself
to those heavy lbs of weight.
Instead, I generalized the implementation of those words in my real life. I am

currently in a situation where there is a tremendous need of changing my LIfE STYle.
She met me recently after too much of ups and downs and wanted me to move ahead
and understand this All in respect to my LIFE ( A short background, SHE is the
perfect one I feel for me, but destiny didn't approves this.)
Back to topic, so here is my learning that I am putting in words that change is the
necessity of LIFE whether you approve or disapprove.
I write what I experience, as I am now a 27 years old kid learning his life lessons. More
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to come and More to learn.
All the best.
Orry
Ingram, Ethics, morals, existentialism
Written Mon
When I did LSD for the rst time. Let me elabotarte.
After I got back from Iraq, my worldview was shattered. I had gotten injured, I was
diagnosed with PTSD, and I was suering from separation anxiety. Not only that, but I
was vehemently against war, completely anti-religious, and felt that in my hometown
my family and community would never except me again. I clearly didn't t in and
everyone said the war changed me, often for the worst. Alcohol, sex, thrill seeking
behavior, just masked the problem. I became a very bitter, depressed human being.
At some point I realized I needed help. I got some therapy, started eating clean and
exercising, laying o drugs, both legal and illegal. This certainly helped, but
spiritually and mentally that war crushed me. I had a giant gaping hole in my being. I
felt as if the war had raped me of my innocence, of my nativity, of my sense of hope in
humanity. And I was only 23.
Then I met Blake. He was a very nice guy, who was into massage therapy and Yoga. He
aso liked to talk about philosophy and psychedelics. He was not like your
stereotypical douchey, top knot kind of wimpy vegan psuedo intellectual
though.but a boxer as well and a very straight talking person. He turned me on to
literature and actual scientic material regarding psychedelics and their historical
use for people with mental illness.
After about a year of preparation and studying, I dropped LSD. I did this in a national
park, in a safe environment with a sober person there to take care of me and guide me
through it
The immediate eects and the few times I did it after completely changed my life. I
found my balance again, both mentally, and even spiritually (even though I consider
myself agnostic).
I noticed my PTSD symptoms drastically change for the better, and people around me
noticed that spark come alive in my eyes again. I started incorporating yoga and
meditation into my life. I made a move and took a lower paying, but happier job out in
California, started surng, rock climbing, meeting new people. I even got married
within two years of my move.
I always thought drugs were for losers, for deadbeats, and dangerous. I was
completely wrong. I am in no way condoning the use of powerful psychedelics, but
speaking from personal experience, they literally saved my life. I was able to put the
war and the past behind me, and my perspective of my entire existence changed.
I am forever grateful that I did LSD, under the supervision of a caring friend and
mentor, who taught me both how to respect psychedelics rst, and to peer within
myself at all the aspects of my personality, so I could nd out just what it was that
kept the ame alive in my soul.
Life really is a journey, and we only get one shot at it. I hope one day that our culture
breaks this stigma of psychedelics and embraces the powerful healing benets they
have to oer. I am living proof of their awesome potential for the growth of the human
spirit.
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Simranjeet
Singh
Gandhi, A self-learned investor in the Indian Stock
Markets, active since 2009
Health is one the top most priorities. Sad part is, no matter what we do, we
are not going to fully appreciate it until we lose it
Money is important but to a certain limit. Once the critical needs are easily
catered, its increase won't have a proportional impact. I have even witnessed
a rickshaw puller returning me the tip oered because he was really happy
with what he had already got
Attitude matters. A great deal more than we think. Low phases are inevitable
in life. How we handle ourself in tough situations denes us
Ultimately hardly anybody cares. No body can understand you as clearly as

you do yourself. Be easy on yourself and others too
Time ies. In 2002, while being with friends, I vaguely had some thought
about say about 2015 and thought in my mind it's way too far way. When I
recall some memories now, it seems as if time as disappeared in thin air.
Don't postpone your happiness to some imaginary time in future
Christopher
Telles, change provocateur
My grandfather to me
"Be your own man, let no other man control you, own your own business to control
your destiny".
Repeated from the time I can remember until he helped me start my rst enterprise
while in high school.
Saumya
Sharma, Lovesick
This.
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I came across them on Facebook this morning.
These weren't any new pieces if information, I knew them all along. But I had pushed
them somewhere in the periphery. I guess, I needed a little reminder.
Lance
Lau, works at Maverick Moto Media
Written Tue
I was celebrating my 30th birthday, or rather, mourning it at a bar with a small

handful of friends. I had been diagnosed with depression and dysthymia at the age of
8 or 9 and had struggled with unhappiness and poor self image for my whole life up to
that point. I was lonely and miserable and had given into despair that I would ever be
anything other than lonely and unhappy. As I stared into my beer, I had a realization:
I was lonely and alone, because I was unhappy; nobody wants to be with someone
who is miserable. I was unhappy partly because I was alone, but the greater
realization was that my unhappiness was more of a result of the fact that I didnt
know how to be happy, I completely lacked the ability. I decided then and there, that
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because I didnt know how to be happy, I would start faking it. Not faking it in an
insincere manner, but in consciously trying to be happy, reminding myself of that
frequently and learning to be mindful of my mind state and redirect it towards a more
positive aect.
That insight, that happiness was a learned behavior, a habit, changed everything. It
took an awful lot of work and an incredible amount of discipline, but ultimately, I was
able to shrug o antidepressants that my doctors had told me I would need to take for
the rest of my life and were not particularly eective anyway. I was able to build a life
that I would describe as happy, after spending the better part of my rst 30 years
believing that I was doomed to experiencing a life where meh counted as a high
mood. I was fortunate to meet a meditation teacher, not long after that insight, who
taught that people are potential buddhas, but they just dont know how and
encouraged his students to pretend and wear the masks of buddhas until they can't
take the masks o. That bit of pithy wisdom armed my insight and inspired me to
practice mediation and in turn, I was able to develop habits that have led to happiness
and for that, I will be forever grateful.
Say
Keng
Lee, Knowledge Adventurer & Technology Explorer in
Strategy, Change & Future-Focus
Written Jun 8, 2016
A quick one, and in a nut shell:
In life, everything is possible; its just a question of strategy and discipline!
Neel
Kumar, I am alive, aren't I?
I grew up in India. Every day, before classes started, there would be assembly. There
would be some announcements, a prayer, sometimes some exercises and it would end
with the national anthem (of India).
I memorized the national anthem, checked the precise pronunciation to be used,

understood each and every word and would stand ramrod erect every time the
anthem would be sung (I would sing along) (once a y landed on my nose and I did
not even twitch my nose to make the y go away).
Then, one day, a teacher was berating another student for slouching while the anthem
was sung saying something to the eect of "many have sacriced their lives so that we
can live in a free India and you cannot even stand erect when the national anthem is
sung. You have no respect for the sacrice"
And funnily enough, it triggered something in me. I realized that no matter how
ramrod erect I stood, those who sacriced to do good in this country or anywhere else
would not benet from me standing. And that led me to question everything - every
ritual, every piece of news/propaganda, every story about my ancestors that my
parents told me, every last thing.
I became me. :)
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Leonel
Erlichman, works at Antel
Written Tue
When I was in my 20's and I worked on a project together with technicians, experts
and referents from a multinational.
My manager gave me the following advice that I apply until this day in any project,
job or situation where I nd myself.
I had been assigned to the project.

I asked: What do I do for this project?
He replied: Sit down next to their expert and learn as much as you can.
Today I continue to choose this option, I try to learn from others as much as I can.
Everyone has something to teach and knowledge does not occupy space.
Wendy
Jacobson, Depression; been there done that. I have developed
skills to share
Wow. Okay two very simple quotes occur to me at the same time. The rst is this:
"This to shall pass" meaning everything is a phase. The best, the worst, the most
boring, the happiest. Everything. We can take the advice to enjoy each moment, stop
to smell the owers along the way, &/or take comfort knowing that whatever agony or
depression or angst we are suering, it will indeed pass.
Secondly this:
"Nothing really matters" This is meant to say that whatever we do or are or become
or don't become, it's all ne. We are all going to die in the end and when we are gone
that's it. Not in a morbid way, but a peaceful way.
I have found these two quotes to be relaxing. When I get all hyped up that I haven't
done enough, achieved enough, about my legacy, my work, money, the kids, getting
old, being alone, tallying how I am screwing up, etc, etc. I just breathe and close my
eyes and think those thoughts. I think, how was the day, was it okay? Well it is gone
now, that one is over. Tomorrow we start again. And one by one the days go by. I
guess maybe that's what Zen is?
Lea
Tartanian, Embrace every second of life. Time marches on quicker
than you think.
Written Mar 9, 2016
Three days before New Year's Day 2002, my son walked out the door of our home. It is
impossible for me to describe the pain, anguish and torment I have suered.
Although there has been some contact, things went south again - misunderstood
circumstances - He has four beautiful children whom will never know us or love us.
The rst week was especially hell on earth. I was Humpty Dumpty. NOTHING would
ever put me back together again.
On New Year's Day my husband was watching football. I had to leave the house. I
decided to see the movie, The Lord Of The Rings. I desperately needed a distraction
from the horrible torment.
This movie changed my life when the hobbit, Frodo, said to the wizard, Gandalf, "I
wish the ring had never come to me, I wish none of this had happened." To which
Gandalf replied, "So do those who live to see such times...BUT WE CAN DECIDE
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WHAT TO DO WITH THE REST OF THE TIME THAT IS GIVEN US." That statement
zapped me like a bolt of lightning.
I did not change overnight...what I DID was - I saw the movie 25 more times. Each
time I felt a little stronger. I got to know and love the characters, the sound track, and
I had something to look forward to during that year: the arrival of the second
installment, The Two Towers. This gave me a wonderful distraction as well as a
purpose. I SAID OVER AND OVER, I CAN DECIDE WHAT TO DO WITH TODAY,
TOMORROW, WITH MYSELF AT THIS TIME. I JOINED FRODO ON HIS JOURNEY
WHICH KEPT MY MIND OFF MY PAIN. IT WAS A HOLY SALVE TO ME DURING
THAT TIME.
I entered a poetry contest at my place of employment about the pain of silence as a

result of this tragedy. It won me rst place and a gift certicate to my favorite store,
Barnes & Noble.
I wrote a letter to Elijah Wood, who played Frodo, and I told him how he had literally
saved my sanity. He sent me an autographed photograph which I will treasure
forever.
Fifteen years have passed. My son has not returned. Dead silence from the whole
family. He just had a birthday and I sent him a text telling him how much I loved
him. No response.
Although the sadness remains, I have learned that the greatest pain on earth is loss
and the greatest peace is acceptance of life as it is. I cannot put toothpaste back into a
tube, I cannot unscramble an egg. I've told God I cannot carry this, and I've stopped
praying and put it all in His hands.
In the meantime, I continue to decide what to do with the rest of the life that is given
me. Focus on those who do love me...I took my daughter to Paris in 2013 and we are
going the the Grand Hotel on Macinaw Island, Michigan in June. She loves and
cherishes me as does my husband and the rest of the family.
Gandalf, thank you. I am busy deciding what to do with today. His statement will
forever remain. And thank you, Peter Jackson, for the Lord Of The Rings Trilogy.
Marissa
Russell, I'm living it.
There is no such thing as "I have to." There is only "I choose to." Underneath all
feelings of obligation and peer pressure lies free will. It doesn't matter how far you are
backed into a corner. You don't have to do anything. You just must be willing to accept
the consequences of exercising your free will. Recognizing that you aren't a helpless
victim of life but always a choice-maker is extremely empowering.
Examples:
You don't have to go to class. You choose to because you don't want to miss
the exam review session that's happening today.
You don't have to go to the gym. You choose to because you are committed to
getting in shape.
You don't have to follow your elders' instructions. You choose to because you
don't want to be perceived as disrespectful.
Sanjay
Verma, What's Life? The spaces between the words in this
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sentence. Nothingness!!
Simply be who you are at this moment. If you are cold, be cold. Hot? Be hot. Sad? Be
sad. Thinking, anxious, mad, whatever! Just be that. Listen to it all, feel it all. Be it all.
Acceptance is key at this point. You cannot be it all without acceptance of what is.
Once you accept what is, which is to say what is true or what is actually being
experienced, an inner peace will take over your entire being. If this is not done you
will stay trapped within your thoughts and deny the moment, hiding away in fear.
You are not something separate to experience, you are experience itself. The moment
is spontaneous and so are you.
Be that!!!
The meaning of life is just to be alive. It is so plain and so simple and yet everybody
rushes around in great panic as if it were necessary to achieve something beyond
themselves- Alan Watts
Venkateswaran
Vicky, Software Engineer, Technology lover
The realization that, Happiness is not something you nd, its something you
create.
Jacob
Kurian, studied at SRM University
You might have more talent than me, you might be smarter than me, you might
be sexier than me, you might be all of those things you got it on me in nine
categories. But if we get on the treadmill together, there's two things: You're
getting o rst, or I'm going to die. It's really that simple, right?
-Will Smith
Bonolo
Mathibela, Live well!
Written Jun 9, 2016
When I joined the corporate world, as a fresh University graduate, I was shocked to
nd out just how callous people could be. I realised that most people see the world as
one big pie with the objective being to get as large a slice of that pie as possible.
This includes hoarding the pie, actively sabotaging other people's chances of getting a
slice of the pie and unethically gaining more pie for yourself. I was determined to not
live my life in such a single pie paradigm.
Instead, I began to see the world as a place where new pies could be created. Where
investing in the success of others mattered. Where kindness is free to give and
inexhaustible.
So began my journey of creating a new pie. Not just for myself, but one that others
could freely avour and earn a slice of. Some call this creating value. Others ubuntu
(the African word meaning I am because you are), and others still, creativity. I call it a
multi-pie paradigm.
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Let go of ghting for yet another slice. Help build dreams, not destroy them. The
world will be a better place for it.
Sehrish
Khan, Newsbu
Life is uncertain so do not take anything for granted. Change is the only constant, and
things/people are in your life to teach you a lesson and their role will nish after they
have taught you the lesson.
Anonymous
I read this as an answer on Quora.. Loved it soo much that I immediately did
copy+paste.. and read it when I get out of my mind...
A statement made by a loving father..
"Yes, you are. You are my superman. You face every day dilemmas, every day failure,
moral decisions, two road choices, and still you know how to get out of them. I've
known you for 20 years. I know studying is easy for you. If you study, you can ace the
exams. That will take you to sky heights. But it may not be where you want to go. You
are my blood. You want to earn the heights, not just achieve it. I may be proud of you
when you get straight grades. I may. But I will be proud the one day you will know
inside out of whatever you do. If you want to work with robots, work with it. Skip
classes and study about it. But make sure you are second to no one in that eld. It may
be more dicult, you may face harder challenges. But the day you will reach that
excellence, 5, 10, 20, 50 years from now, wherever I may be, I will be proud of you. It
doesn't matter that you screwed up your grades. Its just another problem for you. And
there is no problem under this sky that you can't solve. So just solve this problem and
get it over with. Study whatever you wish, because anything you study, no matter
how stupid, any skill you gain, no matter how clerical, no matter how repetitive
it be, that little knowledge, that stupid clerical skill, will save your ass some day.
And you can do all this simultaneously. I know you can, because you are my
superman."
This is the original post: Shivam Mishra's answer to What is the best advice your
father ever gave you?
David
Craige, View my work > DaveCraige.com
That if you make over $43k a year, you are richer than 99% of the world.
That your true friends are your family and the ones that would show up to
your hospital bed if you were very sick.
That incredible persistence is vital for success.

That the answer to many of Life's questions actually begins with "Well, it
depends..."
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That life is absolutely amazing (and that it can also be horribly painful and
unfair too)
Cyndi
Perlman
Fink, Life, I'm getting very good at it.
Updated Jan 25, 2014 Upvoted by Jillian Ratli, Founder of Fear Monster
Obedience School
I'm being serious. My mother told me that my prince would come and carry me o to
the castle of dreams. She really did. It was the early 70's, very early. Poor Steve. I
thought it was his job to make me happy.
Our marriage almost didn't make it. It took me a long time to realize that he wasn't
responsible for my happiness, I was.
There is a line in "Wicked" where she says, "You mean the earth doesn't revolve
around me?" That's how I was brought up. Everyone was laughing, I could hardly
breathe.
It's amazing the stu you've been brought up to believe.
My prince came.
He wasn't on a horse, he was driving a Triumph TR-6.
The castle of dreams had a second mortgage.
It needed a lot of repairs.
I got my head on straight. We made it.
Don't expect someone else to be responsible for "making" you anything. Happy, sad,
fat, thin, rich, poor, it doesn't work that way. At least for me.
Steve
Song, Just this guy, you know?
Written Tue
Rule Number 6 Great rule which is also a great shorthand phrase for gaining
context and defusing tense situations.
Ben and Ros Zanders The Art of Possibility has probably had the biggest inuence
on me of any non-ction book I have ever read. Mindset by Carol Dweck would be a
close second.
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Eric
Stroud, works at The Aerospace Corporation
Written Tue
There have been some very interesting answers and personal stories, but not a lot of
advice.
Let me give it a try.
First. I didnt actually understand this for many years, but I did it anyway. Every 56
years it is a good idea to make a signicant change in your life. It can be as simple as
starting a new educational program, or transferring to another department in your
company. Im not suggesting that you throw everything away, but open your eyes and
brain to other options. When I nished University, I was bored and restless. I had no
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responsibilities so I joined the Peace Corps and went to Africa for two years and
Europe for another year. Those three years were a kind of reboot and wake up for me.
I wasnt a kid anymore and I decided I needed to do something serious with my life.
Second. How did I know that it was time for a change? In some cases I got bored with
what I was doing. Other times I would just start losing track of important items and
issues. Oh, was that meeting THIS morning? Sometimes I would catch myself just
staring o into space. At that point I knew I had to do something. In my case, after
three years overseas, I went to graduate school. That took up six years of my life, and
then I was ready for a change. Five years later, after teaching in University I was
restless and dissatised with my life. So I dumped my academic progression and
chose a new undertaking in space engineering.
Third. There are clearly aspects of your life that will, and should, remain constant. If
you have kids, that is forever. You dont return kids to the store. Marriage and
relationships, well that is another set of issues. Im mainly focusing on life external to
the home. Except
Fourth. What are you doing for yourself? Do you make time for a hobby? Work out
because you enjoy it and not because you feel compelled? Do you have a secret
fantasy? Video game, lightweight porn novels? Give in to these little pleasures, they
are necessary to your emotional and mental well being. If you nd that you are using
substances to escape that uneasy feeling, stop for a while and just ask the question:
What do I want? Ask it every day, many times. You may not get a clear answer or any
answer for a while, but eventually some idea will come to you and you will feel good
about it.
I wish that this question had a simple answer, but it doesnt. There are many things
that you need to consider, but by far the most important is to be aware of signs that
you need to change what you are doing. As I said up above, my window was around 5
6 years.
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Faizan
Ahmad, An avid reader. I meditate and observe a lot.
I wanted to know my purpose and the following quotation gave it to me.
"You were born to make manifest the glory of God".
After the day I read the quotation, I got to know my purpose and I have always worked
happily afterwards. Before that, I did not know why was I working hard or doing
anything else.
Monisha, Living life as it comes

Written Aug 20
1. Pain is inevitable , but suering is your choice : These words were like
sentience to me. This by far was the most inuential line. Simple as it is, I
learnt to stop reacting to life and start responding to it. It always made me
think If something bothers me now, whether its worth my time. If it wont
matter over 10 days, weeks or months then Id try to stop wasting my time!
2. You wont lose anything by trying : Yet another inuential line. What have
I got to loose really, if I did something and I was miserable at it? Maybe a few
jeers , criticisms? But in the end, I will not have any regrets. At least I would
have known I tried rather than always having that Maybe I should have
given it a shot nagging thought at the back of my mind!
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3. Dont hand the pen to someone else when you craft that beautiful story
of yours: Remember no one lives your life except you. People will get over
the choices you made against them but, you will never be able to forgive
yourself!
Accept what others say , but make your own decisions and face the consequences.
Create your own unique story and live it up to your hearts content , because you
never know when you might get a second chance.
P.S : I know the question insists on only one insight, but all these three have created
an impact in me which is undeniable!
Pascale
Lessard, Always appreciate what you have and learn to be
content in any situation
Written Sun
I have never really accepted our societys plan for my life: work all your life to pay
bills. Ive always had this rebellious impulse and I am adventurous. I learned other
languages and traveled, interested in discovering other places and getting to know
new cultures. I always believed in God the Creator of lifes origin & destiny, so that
gave me a higher purpose and hope, believing that I was not on Earth only for a short
while to eat, sleep, get entertained, work and start a family, and then I will disappear
forever and never see my loved ones again. I believe in the afterlife. Now, its the
higher purpose of making a dierence in the world. I have seen a lot of poverty and
people living in misery while I was living abroad. I want to do my part to help improve
that situation, and that is my major goal. I am into the online business trying to get
the extra income that will give me the freedom to do that. lovegames
pllanguagetraining
Lukus
Leonard, Watching my mistakes and those of others
Written Aug 1, 2016
The answer I discovered literally stopped me dead in my tracks one day.
In fact, I was looking in all the places I was supposed to.
Good religion that was only right, worked hard in and out of school and scouting.
I had good moments but most didn't seem to make sense. I blamed my lack of faith in
God, or in circumstances.
I needed to open my eyes.
So I did. I was sitting alone in my room, bawling my eyes out. Nowhere to run or hide.
I had almost been arrested for severe criminal driving. Even my parents expected me
to get jail time.
My friend said to write down a letter to myself as though I was a rather of myself, so I
did.
I re kindled my passion for reading. Lots of business, lots of Leadershi P.
I began a journey, not just a life that needed living
And it just struck me! Normally striking things isn't good. This instance, it was.
The only approval I will ever need to seek, is my own.
That opened my eyes in so many aspects of my life that I had been allowing to be
suppressed. Internet
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I had been mad. Angry. Depressed. Ignorant. Didn't care about myself , let alone
anyone else.
And although things aren't ever perfect, it fell into place. Some people claim the Holy
Spirit of this or that descended upon my being.
I was lied to my entire life. You can't change your circumstances, just your response.
Then I discovered i could either respond OR react!
No person, plant, dietey, or organization can bend me. I am a diamond child deep
under. My very being is unconquerable! And I live and subscribe to that.
For if I can get my own approval, every other lie and tyranny ever preached to me,
cannot control me.
So. I say to YOU. Whos approval do you seek? Gods? Apparently God has this big
architecture all set up for us. So I say, go with that ow.
Man's? The ones who one moment slit open the throats of many innocent beings, yet
the next create laws prohibiting the lesser ones from attempting the same? Ask that of
anything within and beyond creation.
I hope and believe that it can and will hold true for those that have looked deep
enough within to nd the courage to read this.
Much Gratitude.
121 Views
Mayank
Bhogal, Engineer
Written Mar 9, 2016
From the beginning of my childhood till now I know one personality trait that I have
that is " Extrovert " . I see this world in a joyful manner and I really don't give a fuck
about people , the only thing I do is enjoyment at any cost.
The one incident that got my attention and changed the way I see this world and also
altered my prospective about life is " One day I went for a walk with my friends and we
all were talking,smiling, making fun of each other, this is what mostly teeneger's do
and then as we walked I suddenly saw an old women her condition was deplorable
means she was wearing old dirty clothes , dierent pairs of sandals and looked like
she did not have any thing to loose by seeing this condition my mind generated a
quick overview about her and I think that she was a Begger I walked towards her then
I took my wallet out and gave her 100 and walked away, after a few minutes I noticed
someone following me . I turned around and saw that the same old woman was
following me , I suddenly stop , she came to me and gave me back my 100 and said "
Beta always remember one thing that it's not necessary that every poor person you
see must be a Beggar , I admit that I am poor but I don't need your charity to survive".
I was shocked, suddenly I realized that sometime we presume that poor people need
other's help but that's not always true and this change my life forever. My entire
perspective towards this world changed - my prejudices, my biased beliefs, my entire
outlook towards life. No longer do I judge people by their appearances; the poor, the
tramps, the vagabonds. I now see beyond the surface, under their faces, into their
souls.

Nishant
Singh, Android Developer
Ask
Written or25,
Dec Search
If we could see the miracle of a single ower clearly, our whole life would change.
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Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.
The way is not in the sky. The way is in the heart.
-Buddha
Noaman
Siddiqui, Get busy living or get busy dying!
Written Aug 9
ANDY: I guess it comes down to a simple choice, really. Get busy living or get busy
dying.
-The Shawshank Redemption
This movie and this dialogue literally changed my life. I had been blind to the world
around me and was unappreciative of the privileges I had. The love of my family, the
shade of the roof over me and belly full of good food.
It taught me to work hard and achieve what I wanted to achieve. It taught me to live,
truly live. It taught me to go after things which really made me happy instead of
running after supercial things.
Nobody will give it to, you will have to take it. This lesson is worth gold and I am glad
that I watched this movie, which taught me about the real values in life.
Nazia
Hassan, I smile a lot
We have this nagging urge to establish dierences, but what we we absolutely refuse
to accept is that it's all the same, we're all the same
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Prasad
Narayana, Solutions Architect at Department for Environment
and Heritage
Well, this is it! I was looking to answer such a question! What happened with me was
truly dramatic because of "one line statement" made by a friend.
I lived all my life in India and never visited any other country even as a tourist. I was
happy and proud of what I am but still struggled to meet ends with my monthly pay
cheque!
One ne day, a good friend of mine visited us from the USA after 8 long years. We all
friends gathered for a drink. Of course he sponsored!
Before the gentle waiter started to serve us, my friend tipped him Rupees 200.
Roughly $4.
Well, 200 rupees was something I wound spend on my dinner! I looked at my friend
bewildered.
He said, mate it's rupees 200 for you, for me it's $4.
Aghast! My perspective of life changed!
what did I do?
Next month I applied for Aussie visa, got it in a span of 6 months. Resigned my job
and sold my car. Left my wife and 3 yr old back home and arrived at this beautiful
country alone with the very little money I had. Remember I exchanged AUD at 1:56. I
knew none here, and I could survive for just 5 months.
Today, after 3 years, I'm in a great job, blessed with a baby girl recently. This evening,
we registered a land to build our own house. My son is in year 1, I'm sponsoring a
student back home.
More importantly I can tip that $4.
My success is not that I could aord that $4, but I understood that money is relative!
It's nothing.
Pun intended!
Totally unrelated but this poem also made a huge impact on me.
A great poet once said:
If you sprinkle
When you tinkle
Please be neat
And wipe the seat
This applies to men, women, and children of all ages.
Please clean after your good self.


Nick
Wade, Platform / Ecosystem guy at Atlassian
AskDec
Updated or Search
4, 2010 Quora Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
For me, perhaps the biggest thing was understanding that the arrogance born of what
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I thought was intelligence, did nothing positive for me in terms of handling myself
well in the world (of other people around me, in various friendships and other
relationships; and in a wider context you might even stretch the same idea to entire
cultural movements like nations, or other groups). Learning that empathy is very
often exceedingly valuable and at the same time undervalued, I suppose is another
way of putting it - I try to see things from other people's points of view and I try to
criticise others less now than say, 10 years ago. For me, it's been very valuable to
check myself with a few moments more critical thought, in many situations.
Stephen
Kirby, 25 out of the 40+- categories of addictions, I'm down to
7, & I'm still kickin'
Written Jun 5, 2016
You're assisting in one I'm having right now. (I eed up that entire line of typing and
had to go back and x it )(he said with tissue to eye)...funnnny s**. You are sooooooo
clooooose to the understanding, then, of course, there is the application of that
knowledge, that Truth...
I wrote this just moments before I saw the question and made the comment above.
Cory, you wrote;
'It is dicult to be in the now at all times. I would almost say it is impossible.'
'Almost' being the operant word here.
and
'I would like an aha moment similar to that of a "high" (feeling of euphoria).
Something that cannot be felt at all times, and in fact requires being away from for an
extended period of time in order to experience again in the future.'
Ahhh,(a dierent kind of aha moment), you refer to the refractory period as if the
euphoric, nirvanic, experience of which we speak cannot be organized and ordered
after a signicant number of them happen that they begin to form an even larger,
more Wholistic Perspective which I call the 'Whole Truth'. (Refractory periods are for
those with only physical 'needs' as their highest 'high' )
...hehehehehehehehehehgehehehehhh ...F**K...fell out of my chair again...
See if this thing I just posted to another fellow assists you to have an aha moment of
comprehension
==
Can you write an answer to the original question?
Pete,
Actually, I have been by example, but not the focus people might think.
Every time I hehehehehehe, and quite a few times when I dont put it on paper.
While that enjoyable aha moment is happening, I am collating, collecting,

connecting, collaborating, correlating, and corroborating information by using the
genius capabilities of the intelligence I received at the moment of my creation, just
like you.
And this is why I know; I am an everyman. If I can do it anyone can.
The scientically proof-testable aspect of this phenomenon is as follows;
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Within those aha experiences of comprehension, the electrical currents ring o
between the axons and dendrites of the many millions and billions of neural
pathways that make up my entire mind and my body are ring o at a rapidity rate
that is mostly incomprehensible, but shapes up into what I called the Whole Truth,
regardless of what I, or another, say, but it's enjoyable as an increasingly strongly felt
feeling throughout which makes me spontaneously hehehe LOL..
It is as simple as this, I know Im happier, Im experience an aha moment of happier-

ness, regardless, of whatever BS me, or you, or another entity or individual thinks,
says, writes, and/or does to infer dierently. The experience IS every time I endeavor
to elucidate Truth, the Whole Truth, and Nothing but the Truth, so help My Truth.
Happier-ness is the way, because you will understand the process of becoming
happier as you understand using your genius capabilities also expands your neural
pathway access, which lead to the electrical frissons released throughout your entire
frame being felt throughout your entire frame, by doing so.
It feels so much better than to f**k around with the half-lies, and outright lies.
It dissolves that whole polarity-circularity conundrum into insignicance.
What all the seers and sages, throughout all of human history, have been
endeavoring to elucidate, that simple Truth, for the benet of humankind, is what is
the answer to your question!
Its also a much longer explanation, so later, ok? Unless you ask a germane next
question...
300 Views View Upvotes Answer requested by Amit Patil
Ameet
Shome, Your fellow observant human. Experiences existential
bummers every hour.
Updated Jan 6
Once upon a time when I was still oblivious to the variables of how everything overcame
everything else in the rat race called life, when it came to competing with my fellow
students of the class be it in anything, I stumbled upon the elixir of life that I think I've
gotten drunk on quite high to have followed it into adulthood, which qualies as a near-
perfect answer to this question. It has lucidly inuenced my life in more ways than one
and helped me try out everything far beyond my repertoire of small-yet-not so small list
of good abilities. It was nothing great nothing too big, but the circumstance of it
appearing during a stark cobbled teenage life I led back in school - that I had failed
miserably as a footballer only to succumb to incessant injuries - made me smile.
So, what was it?
Somewhere scribbled on the walls of the roadways leading to my home in Tura,

Meghalaya, in a cryptic yet elegant cursive handwriting, the kind one might have
noticed when a stone was to be scribbled against a wall in its creepy monotone opulence
left a white line just good enough to heal your eyes on, it stood. It gave me an instant
revelation into the bigger picture for if success was to be truly won, indeed it must for
once truly have me leave my comfort zone. Every single time. It didn't matter anymore if
I failed or succeeded with those competitive blinds on. The lonely elegance of the lost
inner spirit ran shivers and it still does, every time I think of it every time I fail.
We all are failures just waiting to happen.
What matters is would you stand again?

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Merry
Smith, Researcher, editor, graphic artist. Married to a scientist.
This is a very general answer and I may receive a lot of ack, but it is my answer none
the less. It was my belief that I held for many years, that men, (sorry) treated women
poorly just because they were 'jerks'. It wasn't until I read this book, more specically
a paragraph in said book that my entire life view changed.
It bothered me (and still does beyond the pale) that women were (and sadly,
unfortunately, appallingly in many other countries still) treated or veiwed as chattel
and abused horribly. Throughoutout history, me being a decently educated female of
the 20th century, this behavior from men towards women gauled me. So put yourself
back 100 plus years ago, give or take a 1000 more. I understand that without some
sort of rules, order, morals, ethics, there were/are men that would take advantage of
young women. Hence the protection of their parents and male siblings towards
female members of the family. Religion teaches the males to be the head of
household. Otherwise some men would (have) run rampant in the streets. But, too
many people took it too far.. .. instead of Leading their household, they were abusive
in their protection. Being a leader does not and should not ever equal abusive
behavior. Things like denying education, made it illegal to teach women to read, for
them to become educated and so on. Women had no rights. Couldn't own property,
had zero status, etc. (This is an extremely complex issue, with many levels and
multiple facets that I will not address at this time as I do not want to fall down a rabbit
hole.)
So, not to go any further down the rabbit hole I will pull myself back up. It bothered
me that men regarded women as a commodity. Here's a female now, I'll marry or not
and move on. Leaving women in the lurch, with a child or soiled reputation.
Until I read a particular book. It wasn't the subject of the book, but more how the
author put historical things together. He made me do a mental 180. The single most
inuential line or paragraph I read in a book that changed the entire way I looked at
an entire group of people.
The book is called:
"In The Wake of the Plague" sub 'The Black Death & the World It Made' pages 41-42.
I used to think men were just arseholes, because, well, they were. And yes there are
many misogynists here, then and now.
But In fact up until the turn of the century, 1800s to 1900s, a woman's life span was
surprisingly short.
Quote: -" Women in the Middle Ages had an even shorter life expectancy than men as
long as they continue to produce children. Their frequent pregnancies and childbirth
commonly led to death by 30 from some obstetrical gynecological complication.
Medieval princes, noblemen, and gentlemen tended to have serial marriages because
of the Russian Roulette of pregnancy and childbirth in posed by crude Medical
Science upon their wives.
The male rich and Powerful were often on their third or fourth marriage by the time
they died before their 40th 45th birthday ----of natural causes, infectious disease, or
heart attack.....if a queen or other woman did not get pregnant and give birth she was
shunted o to a nunnery and a new younger perhaps more fruitful wife was chosen. It
was only the wife who was considered to be infertile never the husband. "- end Quote
The point being, it was a matter of what did women die of most frequently.
Pregnancy, and childbirth. Or self induced abortions which many times killed the
woman. Women would rather die than be saddled with a child, or another child. They
feared pregnancy, and rightly so. They knew pregnancy could kill them and if they
lived through childbirth, children would snu any freedom they had. Getting
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pregnant was a Crap Shoot iver life or death. Women had little or zero control over
their reproductive systems until the advent of tbe birth control pill in the early 1960s.
So my view on men has changed, drastically. At least as far as this particular topic.
They weren't really being 'jerks' (and I mean that in the most loving way), nature
forced the behavior. Not condoning, just reporting. Pregnancy and childbirth was a
killer that forced men to behave in a misogynistic manner.
This unfortunately seems to be hard wired in many cultures still to this day.
Nagaraja
Rajapur, be hungry for knowledge and humble for wisdom.
Written Mar 9, 2016
It may sound naive to everyone but i dont think one insight will change your life
forever or just change who you are.
I kind of blame movies for this kind of notion which gets in to people's mind. I think
there's more insights, more intellectual pondering over what you are and repeated
questioning and realisation of what you are changes you to what you want to be.
Rather than one insight.
May be one insight of being good to others pondered over million times might change
your life for the welfare of you and others.
Aakash
Khandelwal, studied at Indian Institute of Information
Technology and Management, Gwalior
I heard it in a video by Jay shetty and he quoted Will Smith -
"We spend money that we do not have, on things we do not need, to impress
people who do not care."
Jay shetty talks about how we live in a paradoxical society with conicting
priorities, messages and opinions. It is quite overwhelming when we are trying
to bring about change in a society where there is a lack of trust in leadership,
where we are sceptical about the integrity or organisations we consume from
and are worried about who owns our data.
The video -
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Kevin
Rathbun, Fulllment Engineer at RealizeRenaissance.com
Written Jun 9, 2016
I grew up with an alcoholic parent. The other members of my family grew to resent
the alcoholic parent. I did too, for a time. Its dicult to be yelled at and insulted
every day of your life. It wears on you.
But as someone whos always tried to gure out how things work, I eventually started
asking myself what would cause this parent to act that way. When I was around 15
years old, I had an epiphany.
What I came to realize is that people only lash out when they are in pain. For this
anger and hatred to be directed at me, it had to exist in the rst place. Anyone who
has ever intentionally hurt you in some way did so because they were suering. When
someone puts you down, they are not stronger than you; they are weaker than you.
Now, whenever anyone tries to bring me down, insult me, etc., I see straight through
it, right to the pain, fear, and insecurity theyre feeling. I dont feel pain for myself; I
feel it for them. I pity the person who harbors such fear and hatred that it seeps into
every interaction they have. Its hard to get mad at someone so desperate.
Perspective is everything in this life.

Douglas
Hoyt, Licensed Psychologist
Written Wed
I was working as a psychologist for about 15 years before I came across the eld of
evolutionary psychology. Before that, human development and human behavior
were things that were just kind of there - - realities, tendencies, and processes that
seem like incidental artifacts inherent in existence, that you learn to respond to and
work with. But with the perspective of evolutionary psychology, all of a sudden,
everything makes sense. (I shouldnt say all of a sudden, because it really takes years
to start seeing with those eyes, and make head slapping observations about things
that ummox you with their clarity, parsimony, and far-reachingness); and I
shouldnt say everything because there are nite limits to our knowledge, that
evolutionary psychology and neuroscience also potently point out).
I got my introduction through Steven Pinkers How the Mind Works, but here is a
quicky intro from two seminal forces in the eld: Evolutionary Psychology Primer by
Leda Cosmides and John Tooby
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Jill
E
Grin, worked at EMTs and Paramedics
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Written Jul 1, 2016
I was maybe 7 or 8. My mom made us take swimming lessons. (Thanks mom! Still
swimming 50 years later !)
They had many diving boards, and way, way, way up high a diving platform. At the
end of some forgotten series of classes, we were allowed to, for the rst time ever, to
climb up there and jump o.
The climb up wasn't a big deal, but once on the platform.we were so high up. I was
scared, but only had two options. I could climb down the now dizzying ladder, or, ..
jump. Neither option appealed to my young, scared mind. I froze for a bit, watching a
few of my classmates jump o, but even more just stand there, scared, like me. A few
cried.
I had the rst epiphany of my young life.
I realized no one was going to save me.
It was all up to me.
I realized it was just one step, and I could make myself do anything, anything.but I'd
have to deal with the consequences.
I took that step .
I remember that experience whenever something challenges me, in times of crisis, of

loss, when afraid. I can make my self do anything. It all starts with just one step.
Expect and deal with the consequences.
Very good advice.

Christopher
R, Engineer, Husband, Father
Written Tue
Things dont happen to you, they just happen.
In a world lled with 7+ billion people, its ironic we look inward so often, and observe
the world from the perspective that things are happening to us.
Learning to not take everything personally has changed my life. Ive become more
empathetic and learned to take things in stride. Its allowed me to focus about what is
good about my current situation instead of focusing on the bad things that have
happened that I cannot change. Ive become a better listener. Ive learned that just
because someone disagrees with me doesnt mean they are insulting me personally.
Its forced me to get o of the sidelines and go after my goals. Its helped me
emotionally cope with political decisions I disagree with vehemently, but recognize
that said decisions are not made to spite me personally.
Of course, bad things happen. And bad things do happen to us specically. However,
learning how to separate whats happening around me and whats happening to me
has allowed me to enjoy life much more.
34 Views
Kunjal
Gatecha, a lucky mom
each and every single day is changing my life. Life has taught me many lessons and i
am grateful to be learnt.But,most important lesson of my life was when i separated
from my husband at the time when i was in need of his care the most.
I was pregnant and i delivered without him. For 18Internet
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days I was without him. After that
the life kept on teaching me.
Trish
Hays, works at Shands @ UF
Written Sun
That my relationships with Males is directly proportional to the lack of relationship

with the male side of my existence.
Didn't think I held any emotion for him whatsoever but in a miniscule way I did. He
allowed his current wife to be abusive to me and a brother of mine. He's not strong
willed.
I realized since he hasn't shown up for me in 40+ years, he's not going to.
I realized I no longer want him.
I realized it was always between Him and Me, not his wife nor his additional children.
I realized the only reason he took me in at 14, for 3 years, was a deal made with my
Mother so that she would drop the lein against his assets due to him not ever paying
child support.
I realized that I wasn't checked on by my own Mother for 3 years. Not by Aunts,
Uncles, Brothers, or family friends.
I realized that I'm the only one that knows my truth. It can't be explained for anyone
else to experience. The abuse was well hidden.
I realized I do experience some humor, on the inside when family members would say
to me,
You're crazy, making it up, it wasn't that bad, get over it, sounds like you're writing
for Lifetime TV, you're weird
I just laugh,on the inside, thinking about what a fool they are and quietly remove
myself from their life.
Happy to report. I'm not being abused by anyone. I don't allow negativity to interfere
with my life. Only allow positive people in. It's caused me to be quite empathetic. I've
spent a majority of my career working with disabled adults enjoying their views on
life and witnessing their joy in attaining new skills.
167 Views
Roberto
Valle, Digital marketer and Guitarrist =) Love Blues
In life you dont get what you deserve; you get what you negotiate - Chester L
Karrass
Nehal
Shah, Wondering
Everything comes with a price tag. It is the choice you make

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Its a book from Dr. Brian Weiss that brought me back to perspective of things. I was
wonder-struck how the 'deepest' of insights are ultimately the same across cultures,
boundaries and regions!
Claude
Medearis, Studied philosophy as a hobby.
Written Wed
One of the things that helped me understand people was when I realized that
everyone thinks emotionally, and mostly in terms of the most immediate future.
How will something make them feel in the next few minutes; sometimes in the next
few days? Rarely do people act on what will happen in the next few years.
When I realized that they were acting on their immediate emotional reactions rather
than in regards to long term consequences, much of human behavior began to make
sense.
Most people arent trying to do mischief or cause damage. Theyre only doing whats
easiest and most comfortable right now, without even asking what their behavior will
cause in the future.
Mike
Bryant, Project Manager at City of Loveland (2005-present)
Written Mon
I think some of the best advice I ever heard was from a gentleman by the name of Tom
Keaver. He was a 10th Mountain Division veteran from WWII. He actually fought in
Italy in one of those historic battles. He told me " Don't work harder, work smarter ". I
always thought that was great advice, and it's true!
Adam
Zimmerman, studied at Indiana University - Purdue University
Indianapolis
Written Mon
When I was in middle school they asked us what we wanted to be. And I didnt have a
clue, so I scribbled in something like doctor or whatever. When I was in high school
they had us take an aptitude test and it suggested I become a psychiatrist. Senior year,
when a teacher was out, I basically lead the class discussion and review on MacBeth,
and people told me afterward that they got better grades because they got the
material better with me explaining it.
So this is the story of how I became an insightful teacher, excellent at reading my

students right?
Heck no.
What happened? Life. I was in school to become a secondary school teacher

(specically middle or high school level English and Literature). I moved to a new city
and state to be with the love of my life, and I had to set my college aside and get a job
to pay the bills. The plan at the time was that Id do it long enough to get my degree,
but school costs money even with some nancial aid, and if it was that or keep a roof
over our heads or vehicles running, we had more immediate concerns. Bills got out of
control and we had to work harder to catch up. Sometimes we did, sometimes we
didnt. School got put o. What should have been a year and a half turned into seven
years.
At seven years in my job I felt like Id learned everything I could, and started looking
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around. I liked my company. I really liked it. When an opportunity opened up in
another department I was interested, and my then-manager gave me the nudge to go
for it. And Ive never been happier since.
Since I switched, Ive had three promotions in ve years, signicant raises, and most
importantly to me, when I turned 35 I had a moment of reection and I realized Im
genuinely happy with my life. My then-girlfriend is now my wife, and yeah we have
bills to pay, but we can aord them, and we have all the recreation (toys, games, trips)
we want, we have a good and comfortable and safe home.
Could I make more money? Sure. You can always make more money, but Im making
more than Id be making as a teacher at this point. Could I keep getting promoted?
Yep. Im in management now, and every time I take a promotion or a raise, Im getting
groomed for the next big thing. Do I have stressful days at work? Yes, because I care
and I engage and I love what I do. Am I compromising? Not really.
So what was the the single insight that changed my life?
That Im okay with being me. That I like being me.
Im not sure people do. They get so wrapped up in what they want or what they think
they need that its all they become. And there are diminishing returns. At a certain
point you arent realistically going to get more out of life; your bandwidth is fully
loaded.
Likewise I think a lot of people want to change themselves, and changing yourself
isnt necessarily bad, but for it to be okay you have to do it for the right reasons. Id
like to get in better shape, and I am getting in better shape, but Im doing it because
getting in shape means I can enjoy myself more and not have niggling minor health
issues constantly. Thats how you end up on cyclic diets and trouble kicking bad
habits; you get stressed out about it. Its a lot easier if you relax, accept yourself, and
make decisions from that position. People notice. You dont have to like everything or
be Pollyanna about bad situations, but recentering yourself puts you in a better
position to cope. Have a plan. Execute. Analyze. Move on. But never stop liking
yourself.
Star
Gay, Parent, Dental Product Marketer, Writer, Photographer, Heavy
Metal Music Lover
Life is not fair.

Because it really isn't. It's frustrating watching people in my apartment complex sit
on welfare and have rental assistance only pay a hundred dollars a month for the
same apartment I pay a thousand for.
It's frustrating seeing people with their EBT cards buying beer and cigarettes at the
store.
It's frustrating that there are people in the world who get o on hurting others.
It angers me that animals are abused and neglected every day.
It really gets to me that I am a good person, who tries to always do the right thing, and
crap just keeps happening.
195 Views
Bill
Streifer, studied at New York University
Written Wed
I just realized that U.S. Presidents have lied to the press and then denied it. I always
thought you could trust them (at least when they spoke in public), But now I dont
know what to believe. It was heartbreaking and it changed my views on the United
States presidency and America by extension. And IInternet
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understand I am not alone.
Shomi
Arora
I was preparing for some Debate competition when I was in high school may be .
Wanting to research the material to put in went to library (Internet was almost non
existent in India at that time) came across a book on Life quotes and one quote stuck
with me
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step
After so many years this is still my fav go to Inspirational quote and to a large extent
shaped who I became .
Yaa
Licari, In the USA became happy mother of 5 invented products in
billions of homeses.
About 40 years ago Dear Abbey wrote an advise about the importance of ATTITUDE.
I printed about 20 copies and pasted at least 5 on our plain white lobby walls. When
interviewing candidates for a job one of my rst questions was whether he/she read it
and what did he think about it. Yup, "life's joys come by the teaspoon-full...don't miss
them"
70 Views
Sumi
Jones, Empowerment coach. Helping people & couples be the
best they can be.
I think this would have to do with learning to love myself. I grew up in an atmosphere
where whatever I did was never good enough. Part of this was due to family life, the
other due to the career I went into. (A ballet dancer) You could always be better, jump
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higher, turn faster, and all of that. Coming from this type of background set me up to
always be pushing myself and not taking the time to acknowledge what I did
accomplish. I was always looking for what was wrong or needed improving or xing.
Once I learned to be easier on myself - to realize everyone in life is doing the best they
can, even when they mess up my happiness and sense of peace increased. I learned to
really accept myself for who I am. I still strive to improve. I think we can always learn
new things and improve who we are as people. But in a balanced way. I now take
time every day to notice what I'm doing well. It makes a huge dierence.
With advertising, we're constantly being told how we could be "better, richer, thinner,
prettier, etc, etc". We somehow become conditioned to only notice the bad, not the
good. If you take the time to really notice what you're doing well, no matter how
small it is, you'll be amazed at how your outlook changes. You'll start naturally
looking for positive things in life and it changes how you feel.
Sumi Jones | Achieve your goals

192 Views Answer requested by Anil Khanna
Gayathri
Subramanian
That people go through much worse in else part of the world and have much less for
their means of survival made me more humble. Eventually changed my whole
outlook. I now have a deeper appreciation for whatever is there in my life at the
moment instead of having all my senses focusing on lling the bottomless pot. It is
most important to be grateful and thankful for what you have (health, people,
friendship, peace) than be greedy for more (wealth, material possessions, cadre, travel
the world, etc).
Mau
Valmont, Livin' la vida Lohan
"Tout est possible dans la vie."
My French teacher said that to me one afternoon. I was telling her how much I wanted
to go back to France and leave everything behind. It was a period of my life when I
was unhappy, frustrated, clueless, confused, and just having a quarter-life crisis.
Those words, while simple, truly inspired me to do some serious research and
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evaluate all my options to make that dream come true. The process took me about two
years, but I nally succeeded.
I didn't go back to France, but not because I couldn't, but because I found fullllment
in another country: Canada.
My teacher's words continue to inspire me every day, lifting me up when I think I

can't keep going. She never said things would be easy or that they would happen
quickly, but with motivation and perseverance, I'm sure I can get wherever I want.
78 Views
Swaroop
Rao, doesn't have a way with words
I like to philosophise while riding my two wheeler (yes, a very dangerous habit), and
one day I came up with a statement - "Nothing is infallible". I thought about it for
some days, and I liked it.
Of course, moments after I came up with the statement, I realised its logical aw; if
nothing is infallible, then neither is the statement itself, which is a contradiction to
the original statement. Nevertheless, with that exception, I liked that statement
which allows me to question everything and assume nothing.
I did a quick google search later and got a couple of hits for the statement. It might
not be original, but it's working for me.
224 Views
Jonathan
Mikhail
Cayne, I enjoy physics and history, I'm smart some of
the time.
Written Sep 14
I successfully biked cross country. I ew from Boston to Portland, and drove to

Astoria. From there, I biked through Oregon, Idaho, Montana, North Dakota,
Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and nally, New Jersey.
Reaching the coast was my moment of insight. Until then, I didnt think Id make it. I
thought an unfortunate accident with a car or truck would take me out. Or maybe Id
run out of water in the Badlands of North Dakota. Whether it was my fault or not, I
never thought Id actually do it. I realized that I could do things I once only dreamed
of, and that moment will stick with me until my last breath.
Jia
Ying, Lived a little, lived a lot.
Written Jan 25
The world doesn't owe you a living.
Want that scholarship? Work your ass out.
Want that job promotion? Work your ass out.
Nothing is a given. Theres no such thing as waiting for something to happen.

Whatever youve done for the past many years of your life got you to where you are
now.
Want change? Make a change.
Everything, everything leading to now is a result of your own actions and inactions.
The world doesn't owe you a living. Internet
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Max
Zimmermann, In 40+ years of life you learn a little bit about it, or is
that nothing at all
Helping others to acknowledging that everything they need to become great is

already within them, I only have to help them nd the outlet to let others see the
greatness.
I am not sure which author, speaker or individual made me realize this I heard it from
so many over the years and one day it just made sense it clicked so to speak, and since
that time I have helped people around the globe and hopefully this answer will help
others realize it as well and they too will help other realizes just how great they are.
69 Views Answer requested by Brian Brave
Max
Mendoza, A #ModernExplorer, Community Curator, & Inspirational
Storyteller.
Written May 3, 2013
The power of gratitude & appreciation.
I have realized that most people who pursue much of anything - success, wealth, etc -
are never full lled. With a constant desire for more one will ultimately likely lead to a
life of "never enough."
My own experience with this guided me to discover the magic of appreciation.

Through integrating the practice of gratitude I can now come from a place of
wholeness. Of feeling full already by appreciating that which I already have.
That said, my drive & ambition will always make me want to continuing growing.
Though I can now come from a place of joy for what I have, which is a much more
powerful place to come from then a place of lack.
For this, I am grateful & I hope you too may experience the virtue of gratitude. It truly
is a vital foundation to ever experience a life of authentic abundance.
James
Haforlarin, Life coach who turned his life from awful to
Awesome!
Written Tue
It was late 2013 when I was reecting.
I realized I've been putting my happiness in the hands of others all my life. I'll always
ask permission from people before I make a decision.
I'll always try to be the good guy.
I came to the realization that I don't need others permission to be successful,

Condent and happy.
I had to rely on myself and take 100% responsibility of my life.
I'm the only one that will determine my future and I had to stop people pleasing.
My deepest insight was that I had to choose myself before anyone choose. I had
to decide to be happy and not wait for anyone.
And then I read a book that conrms this by JamesInternet

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Altucher.
Anonymous
Written Dec 30
That I am just another introvert and there is nothing wrong with me.
In a jist, here's 19 years of my life relevant to the question :
In playgroup, I was one among those few cry-baby kids who never wanted to
leave their mamma. I did not mingle with all of the other kids over there as
easily as some othersI once had a teacher tell my mum that I was going to
be a slow learner just because I was quiet and preferred solitude.
Talking about the rst day of my school, I can clearly remember me sitting
quietly; in the school lobby; in front of my teacher where we were supposed
to assemble. Most other students were not so quiet, trying to talk to
whosesoever they could, trying to make friends, and then there was me.
As I was growing up, I began to think of my quietness and preference of

solitude as more of a problem than anything else. Though I performed
amazingly well in studies and always was among the top of my class, I never
really felt attached to school in a way that most others do. School,friends,
recess', these words didn't excite me much.
I never really made any close friends, I mean, yes, everyone liked me, but no
one saw me as a 'real' friend. I preferred to stay alone and do my work alone
most of the times, and I felt there's something wrong with me and that I need
to change. Back at home I had a couple of really good friends with whom I
used to play and I felt that was the only normal thing about me, I was an alien
in my class.
Recess was a nightmare for me. I hated recess so much that I looked forward
to half days in School , well moreso because half days meant no recess. As the
recess bell rang, kids would jump out of their places and run to meet and chat
with each other as they shared tins, while I was the only one who sat at my
bench eating my own tin pretending to be busy with some work or reading
something. I felt guilty, I felt ashamed, but I didn't want to be like the rest.
One incident I particularly remember, and will remember forever. Science

class, our teacher was speaking about her experiences in college, and she
mentioned about her practical partner who was dumb and quiet and let her
do all the work. As she spoke, one of my outspoken classmates yelled just
like *insert my name*. And my eyes felt heavy with tears, and I remember
trying hard to not blink, otherwise the tears would have own out making it
obvious. And it was the rst time I remember being rude to any of my
classmate, I said It's boring talking to him in quite a defensive tone and
the entire class became silent. Thank the teacher, she was very supportive of
me and she told that guy it was inappropriate of him to say so.
Just after clearing my SSC board exams , I joined FB and then followed all of
mine other accounts on social media. And boy did I enjoy those, it felt so
much more comfortable texting than speaking.
But the main thing was that I was exposed to the word introversion. I learnt. That
being alone and being lonely is a dierent thing. That 1/3 of the population might be
feeling just like me. That individuals dier. And that there is nothing wrong with me,
nor is there anything wrong with my extroverted friends. That we have dierent
strengths. And that there is nothing wrong with me. Thank you internet!
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Ali
Al'Ali, I have experience lots of dierent cultures and that important
element.
Written Mar 9, 2016
Try to avoid ght or unnecessary urgment that would want your time and energy. You
need that energy for something useful. I have stopped lots of thing in my life and net
results are I become more focus with clear mind.
My point is that, it is easy to enter into ght or argument but very dicult to get out
of it.
122 Views
Corrine
Lin, passionate about exploring and trying all things that
remotely interests me
I came across a similar article some time back, breaking down the time we have here,
but putting it in my context.
We, those of us who are caught in the rat race, who hate our jobs, postpone activities
we enjoy, come alive only on weekends when the parties start. Mondays to Friday
afternoons are reserved for the boring activities, Sundays are for recovering, mulling
and preparing for Monday blues. That leaves us with roughly 1.5 days of fun a week.
Which means, 52 weekends x 1.5 days = 78 days fun days out of 365 days = 21.3% of
fun in one year.
If you do one interesting activity one weekend, you might enjoy 52 meaningful
activities in one year.
If you are 25 years old, and you live to 80, and your memorable moments are only
reserved for weekends, some Public Holidays and annual holidays, you might have 52
weekends x ~55 years = ~2,860 weekends across your remaining lifespan, provided
you do something you enjoy every weekend, and provided you live to 80.
Across the 365 days that we have in a year, to be able to enjoy only 20% of them is
a harsh reality and wake-up call for me.
It spurred me to break out of my comfort zone more, to get up and out, to show up
more to events I never thought I'd go. It taught me to start doing something I enjoy
and care for now.
114 Views
Jacob
Leiter
Written Nov 7
Once, after making a small purchase at a convenience store, the clerk said, Try and
have a nice day now. It took a second, because like most people I was anticipating the
standard response along these lines that usually accompany these types of
interactions. However, the instance of the word try soon began to stir the pot in my
consciousness. Id never heard it said that way, but the clerk realized something I
hadn't at that point. We all hope for good days, we assume it's up to the universe to
organically provide us with either and good day, orInternet
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a bad day whether as a
consequence of karma, or the uncertainty inherent in the chaos that drives entropy.
That is not always the case. Sure, there are more things out of our control than in, but
we really can have an inuence on our experiences. It is up to us to work for the good
day, rather than depend on the presumed benevolence of the universe. For me, this
has come to mean acceptance. Acceptance of the way things are, rather than oat
desperately in the sea of should be. To take stock of what is good in my life, and
assess what measures to take, if any, to correct the variables that have cause the
distress.
Matthew
Clark, studied at University of Pittsburgh
I wish I knew where it was from so I could attribute it properly, but this simple four
phrase quote:
You can't have everything you want.
You must make choices.
Every choice has a cost.
Your choices have consequences.

77 Views
Bob
LeJeune, Retired speech therapist.
Written May 4, 2014
That my happiness depends on me.

Douglas
Dea
Written Jun 8, 2016
There are three that come to mind. I dont know which is most important in
changing my life.
A. When I was a child I lived in a suburban home which had a living room. In this
living room there was a globe, Encyclopedia Britannica, atlas, dictionary and other
educational materials. I would sometimes spend an afternoon going through these
things. I looked at all the places in the world, scanned the subject headings in the EB,
reading some entries which interested me at the time. I soon had the realization,
insight if you will, that the world was too big. There was simply no way I could learn
it all. At best I could get a vague idea of the whole picture with a few areas being
clearer than others. I began to think of the world as a vast jigsaw puzzle, one with an
unknown picture. Im now 48 years old and still trying to gure out the whole picture.
I think I have a grasp, an idea, on the size and scope of the pieces and where the
borders are.
B. Also when I was a child I had a great yearning to help others. I thought I had all
sorts of intelligence and wisdom and could solve problems left and right, if only
people would listen to me, dammit! As I grew older I realized, had the insight, that not
only do people not want to listen to me, their problems are deeper and vaster than I
could possibly know. I couldnt help them, most are too far gone. I dont even want to
try anymore, its too much energy and probably futile.
C. At some point, not sure when, maybe my teenage years, I realized I kept hearing
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the phrase our ancestors did this for us or some such variation (Your parents toiled
so you could have a better life! was common.) The insight fell into place: Mankind
has had a settled existence for about 10,000 years. That is roughly when the rst
towns and permanent settlement were being built. Since then humanity has suered
countless pains and tragedies. Natural ones such as storms, disease, ooding,
allergies, harsh winters are common. So are unnatural ones such as wars, slavery,
accidents, hard work, famine, murder, rape, theft, lies, betrayals, etc. They suered all
this for millennia just so their children could have a better life.
So, here we are now, in 2016. We are living through the Golden Age of mankind but
people still arent happy. I think its time we start being happy, joyful and take
pleasure in life. Lets cash in on what our ancestors have been wanting for us since
forever. Why spend our time ghting and being angry? Lets get out there and have
some fun! Im not advocating a hedonistic existence, but certainly a more pleasurable
one should be had. Its a beautiful world with countless entertainments to enjoy. Lets
go enjoy some!
138 Views
Joe
Cassavaugh, works at Puzzles By Joe
Written Tue
I dont know when I rst gured this out and adopted this strategy in general, but I
think of it as leveraging your future. I grew up as the only non-jock with 3 jock
brothers. At some point, I realized that I could learn more about life from sources
outside my family (and their values) and that Id be better o because of it. I realized
that whenever I felt like I wasnt 100% tting in and/or enjoying the current situation
or activity, that I could always go o by myself and read and/or do other activities by
myself that would ensure that my future self would be happier. At one point, I even
used the expression, sometimes out loud, sometimes just to my self of: You can swim
in my pool someday. This was usually when one of my brothers was being obnoxious
about something they did (sports-wise usually) or just being snotty to me. I often
thought it to myselfand what it meant to me was, that I knew my life was going to be
better once Sports/High-School and small time life was behind me; and that I would
actually be big enough to forgive them for being snotty to me.
Making the decision, at an early age, that I wasnt limited by my current environment
(We werent rich, we werent poorbut there was very little we were forced to doso
part of leveraging your future is realizing that you have mostly self-limited-freedom
within that environment to do what you want)and that I could actually make
choices to up my odds for future happiness.
One way to put it, is that at a very early age, I realized that I was personally
responsible for my own future happiness, and once I realized thatI became happier
in the moment, worked harder (in things that interested me) and I made better
choices while being realistically optimistic about my own future.
Im 59 now, and I spend time thinking about leveraging my pastwhich is a way of

saying that I now think about what makes me happiest and how can I leverage the
work Ive done, and the skills Ive accumulated over the years in order to be even
happier now.
Descartes I think, therefor I am didnt go far enough. My insight in a nutshell is: I

think therefor I will be thinking tomorrow as welland I can make choices right now,
to up the odds for my future self to be happier
125 Views
Steve
Garvin, I've moved from severe depression to living a deeply
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satisfying life.
Written Apr 8, 2016
You can't provide water from an empty well.
In order to be of greatest service to others, I have to be well myself. That means I need
to care for myself rst before giving my all to others. It's like the oxygen mask in an
airplane. Put your mask on rst then you can assist fellow passengers. You passing
out from lack of oxygen isn't going to help anyone.
Instead of putting myself last, I put my self-care at the top of the list. Not because I'm
selsh or arrogant but because I can provide my best for others when I am at my best.
88 Views
Saleema
Sharief, Intern Doctor
When anger rises , always think of its consequences... - Confucius
Sravanti
Ghosh, works at Indian Statistical Institute
That some one always cares.....

There are far too many posts on Quora which seem to suggest otherwise!!Through
personal anecdotes, experiences - immediate or vicarious, most seem to advocate the
idea that we are by ourselves and no one gives a damn or shit.
But should one ponder over the times they've been down and out or life times you
could do well, with an extra push, you will nd in your life history there has always
been some one who has cared or reached out. Often it's not the person you would
have thought twice about ,it could be an utter stranger even, not necessarily the
person you would have wanted to care. But someone always does.....so hold on tight.
You matter.
Martin
Bermea, studied at Monterrey Institute of Technology
Written Sep 14
I live in a society where people are irrational some of the time. And I nd it sad how
we all take advantage of that, especially politicians, businesses and religions. Few
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people actually analyze their actions. Every one wants to exert their inuence or
power and no one wants to follow the rules fully. We all seem to think that our case is
dierent.
Helen
Mazzer, Crazy cat lady, I come from the land downunder
Remember all those stupid things you have done in your life? Nobody else does. The
time you said or did something silly? They dont remember it. This, of course, only
applies to low level idiocy. If you did something really horrible, that will be
remembered.
156 Views
Neha
Malik
My dad died of a sudden heart attack when I was 22. The year after that my mom was
diagnosed with Stage 3 Cancer, with me as the sole supporter of my family. I lost my
home, my friends and pretty much everything.
The insight: Life is too short - any day may be the last. Live each day as if it is. Live,
Love and Hurt. Give fully - it makes life worth living!
Natali
Jakarian, works at No Work Yet
Written Jun 8, 2016
It might have been ended up like this if i did that
This might have never happened if i did this but did that
This quote explains our lives.. the opportunities and question we could take but
didnt.. the things we could do but didnt due to circumstances, fear and so on
Hope this was good enough :)


Chiux
Nebber
That being successful is not having more money but freedom to do whatever with our
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lives as we please.
Angela
Awad, You will never know till you face it
Written Oct 26
What I am about to write now is my own translation for something Ive once read online,
the original language is not English and English is not my native language but I decided
to share it because I think its worth it.
What Ive found instantly changed my respective for everything in my life and changed
the way I deal with it. I always read it, always remind myself with it and even share with
people who I think they may get aected by it. Happy or sad, helpless, misguided or even
frustrated I always read it and nd comfort int it.
No friend will share your pain with you, no loved one will bear the pain for you,
no close one will stay up the night for you.
Take care of yourself, protect it, cherish it, and don't give whatever happens
more than it deserves.
Be sure whenever you are broken only yourself will put you back together. Be
sure when you fail or lose only your - will- makes you win. Your ability to stand
again is held by no-one but yourself. Dont look for yourself for what it worth in
the eyes of people, look for it only in your conscience in your soul. If your
conscience is relieved your are left up, and If you knew yourself no harm will
come to you in whatever said about you.
Dont carry the burden of life, leave it to God. Dont carry the burden of the
future its in the hands of God. Only think of one thing ; how to fulll God's
expectation of you,how to seek the pleasance of God only, because if you do God
will please you, protect you, and give you whatever you worked for.
Dont give up on a life that made your heart cry, and ask a god to give you better
than what you lost, cause a single prayer could get you happiness
God will never forget a good deed you have done, neither an ordeal you helped
ending, nor an eye almost cried and you made it happy.
Live your life on the principle: Be good you nd goodness.
Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyya

Vibesh
Nambiar, armchair thinker
Written Jan 5
An Insight that changed my life ?
Okay here it goes.
Last year I was at a mall with one of my friend ( let's call him X )and a corporate
company as part of their promotional activity was giving out T shirts for free.
I was so excited to get the free goodies that I persuaded my friend to join me.
Below is an excerpt from our conversation
Me:Dude come on, lets get that free T shirt.

X: No bro , don't you see the long line?
Me: Dude so what ? free T shirt
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X: Dude see there is a long line , it's just not worth it.
Me: Dude, free T shirt.
And that is when it struck me.
I could only see the free T shirt but he could only see the line.
There are two ways to perceive your goals in life :some people are so focussed
that they see only the things they want to achieve while some people only see the
hurdles that are present in the way of achieving the things that they want.
To succeed in life,always be the former.
P.S: I stood in that long line and got that free T-shirt.
Thats its folks.
Hope it helps.
Kevin
King, I strive to become a better version of myself each day.
This is a really tough question for me to answer, but I think one insight above
everything else stands out in my life.
I learned from reading The Dening Decade by Dr. Meg Jay that I am creating the
life I want to live in the future from the actions I take currently.
Hopefully this inspires you to live life with purpose!

135 Views Answer requested by Korey Daniel
Sankara
Lingam, There is an ultimate power............beleive it or not.....
Written Tue
Believe It or Not, but this happened to me.
There is an ultimate power which we are terming it as God, Nature, Belief,

Supernatural, etc. I am not here to debate whether God is real or not. But I want to
share an incident which made me to believe in that ultimate power.
After my graduation without any job, I joined in my college itself as Research

Assistant to gain some experience from the ongoing research projects. My friend
Subhadhanuraja also joined with me. Our Research head told us that for the rst
two months we wont get any money, Because during that rst two months we have to
get familiarized with the project and when we start to work we can get the salary.
That period of my life was one of the most dicult part I have ever faced. I dont want
to ask any money from my family but they understood my situation and they have
sent few thousand rupees.
That was the rst time we stayed in some rented rooms and for that we have to pay
some money as advance. we spent some money on some of the required things for the
room and nally left with few hundreds
so, to save the money me and my friend use to walk more than 10 kilometers instead
of taking the bus, eating less or sometimes skipping the food.
In that time my friend called me to visit a temple (Marudhamalai, Coimbatore) which
is away from our place. so, we decided to skip our breakfast and lunch and using that
money we bought one day pass to travel in the bus. we both are so hungry and the
temple is some thousand feet above the ground, it Internet
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is located over a mountain. some
how we managed to the entrance of the temple.
When we entered in the entrance there was a man in-front of us and he asked us to go
to the temple dining hall to take some free food. As I mentioned earlier we were so
hungry these words felt like the words came directly from the god. we said just
now we are entering the temple, we will eat after giving our prayers to the Lord
Then what he said was so epic which made me to believe in that ultimate power. He
said EVEN THE GOD WILL NOT BE HAPPY TO SEE YOU WITH EMPTY
STOMACH, FIRST EAT SOME FOOD THEN SEE THE LORD I still remember his
words because those were perfectly matched with our situation.
Then we got served the tasty food something similar to the picture below except
without the small containers..
119 Views
Jesse
Fei, Living life, learning life
Written Aug 28
I was watching this movie about a person who was being convicted of being a soviet
spy. He was in the courtroom, and he was very calm and replied to everything with a
smile. It was so unusual, that the lawyer defending him (played by tom hanks) asked
him something along the lines of are you not nervous at all? He replied would it
help?
. Instead of wallowing on how bad I did on a test, I Internet

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focus on why I did bad and how I
can do better. Wallowing in self pity and crying over things won't help you at all.
Being nervous will only make things worse. It's suprising how much it's changed my
outlook on life.
P.s. Sorry about my writing skills, they aren't very good XP

Ashutosh
Singh, Digitally quoracious.
One of my friend said this long years ago "It's impossible to even have a burger on a
street shop without getting embarassed by the sight of some poor chap."
India is probably one of the most unequal countries in the world and yet,it survives.
Pat
Ruge, studied Accounting at MBA (1980)
Written Wed
At the age of 34, I had a friend who returned to college. I thought her no smarter than
I, although she was well read in history. I had three pre-teens sons, was a blue color
worker and decided if my friend could make it thru college, then so could I, after all,
she had to get her GED before she would be taken seriously as a college student. Even
though I considered the fact that I had probably graduated in the lowest 25% of my
high school class. College at that point was not even a consideration - being the rst
in my family to even graduate high school was a major achievement. Although I never
considered myself to be dumb or stupid, I never considered myself to be smart
or intelligent either.
At this point, in my life, my husband, who held a Masters Degree in Engineering, was
my only role model. While circumstances meant relocating many times in the
beginning of his career, I was the one who always started over at the bottom of the
pay scale. Tired of starting over, I decided it was time to give serious consideration to
achieving a college degree. I started at a community college, two years, onto a 4 year
university to get my BS in Accounting. Working full time- going to school full-time for
the next two years, I received my Masters Degree in Business Administration.
By the time I was 40, I had an MBA and really just beginning my career as a
professional. In retrospect, what I had going for me was a great deal of common
sense. I was older, I was experienced in the world, and I was able to make decisions
about my career that younger people were not equipped to make. At the top of my
career (now retired) I was earning over $200k/year as a consultant, with all expenses
paid (travel, housing, per diem).
A few years after receiving my MBA, I returned to my community college to pick up a

copy of my transcript, as I was considering real estate sales as an option. The envelop
was sealed, as required by state regulations. The clerk noticed my disappointment
and said to me Youve never seen this have you? She went to the back and produced
a copy for me to see. On my transcript, it read Graduated with Great Distinction. I
was probably close to 50 years old at this point, and for the rst time in my life, I was
able to say to myself, Youre not dumb at all, youre probably even smart!
Throughout my career, I have met members of Mensa (the smartest of the smart).
What I discovered about them is that they have little if any common sense. Ill take
common sense over smart any day. Not only does common sense allow you to weed
your way through day to day problems, it allows you to be a social human being who
can recognize as your friends who are willing to help you, but to enlists them to
become a better employee and help you become more successful.
I had a wonderful career, starting at the age of 40. It all began with the idea that
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maybe, just maybe, I was smart enough to pull it o. Its never too late.
Ajay
Kumar, a sincere learner...
Updated Jan 13
"Sometimes help comes from unexpected places... and it makes all the dierence..."
~Rahul Dravid, Graduation Speech of BITS Pilani.
While you are alive, you will be meeting inspiring people...who will hold your hand
for few moments and help you through the most important phases of your life...and
that too unknowingly!
Its only when you look back, you realize their importance...the importance of the role
they had already played.
From my personal experience, I feel this is the way God accompanies us...in our hard
times.
Layla
Issa, Startup founder, and International Marketing Specialist
Updated Jan 24
When I was a kid I was infatuated with the appeal of Disney heroes and heroines, to
the point where I wanted to be just like them. I mean ,what kid wouldnt? They were
free to do whatever the heck they wanted, lived in a fantasy world, and most
importantly they were good and got to beat the bad guys.
Or so I thought.. I mean I was made to believe..
I rooted for Peter Pan and hated Hook. But, why?
It was because Peter Pan looked like and acted like a kid. As a result, I could relate to
him and because I could relate to him I believed his narrative over Hooks. I accepted
it only and didnt look at dierent perspectives.
But, I dont know many good guys who make a living kidnapping children or
pretending to be a child when he is older than Hook . He isnt good according to
parents, thats for sure. What do we know about Hook? Just because we only see him
ghting doesnt mean there isnt more to his story. Peter also did cut o Hooks hand
,Darth Vader style, and fed it to a Croc. As a result, a crocodile is chasing him for
eternity. Tough stu. Maybe he isnt evil . Perhaps, Hook was fed up of Peters
suspicious operations and just wanted revenge for his hand ?
We as humans have bias we are unaware of that makes us fall into errors of
judgement These bias can distort our sense of reality if we let it .
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Saumyansh
Dhabriya, Living life, one day at a time.
How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.
Breath and let it sink in.
This quote instantly connected to me because essentially days are what life is made
up of, and when you believe that whatever you do today is going to pile up and
become your life. You automagically become conscious and begin making better
choices.
78 Views
Rori
O'Hara, Wearing All Hats (2012-present)
Written Sat
That my own cynicism was making me miserable. A friend told me this while we were
at a transformational conference and I wasnt quite getting it. My son had recently
died and I was indignant with life.
Soon after, serendipitously, I learned from a neuroscientist how thinking positively

optimizes brain function. Suddenly, the payo of cynicism wasnt as good as the
payo of positivity.
I since have developed a business teaching people a formula for positive thinking that
has been proven by many neuroscience studies.
46 Views
Keyur
Kumbhare, Life is wonderful
Updated Dec 27
Few years ago, I had a very bad habit of giving up on things very easily.
One day, I read this Quote.
When you are not practicing, remember, someone somewhere is practicing, and
when you meet them they will win.
Ed Macauley
After reading this, that bad habit never came back.
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This quote changed my life. Did it change yours?
In case you like my answer, please do visit my prole here.

Denise
Joyce, Super Saiyan at Ipsy (2013-present)
Written Jan 25
My dad told me once during our usual heart-to-heart talks to Accept the fact that
youre a dork & your life will be a lot easier.
As a child, I was bullied. Not only was I the only Filipino in a classroom lled with
white children, but I was also extremely smart for my age & just plain socially
awkward at times.
I was originally a bright & energetic kid, who overtime, became very shy & insecure. It
took a long time for me to truly embrace who I was & to be proud of my intelligence.
Ive realized how important it is to be authentic. I used to believe that I had to look &
act a certain way, as well as dumb myself down in order to be accepted by others.
The truth is not everyone will be my biggest fans, but that shouldn't change how I
perceive myself. I love who Ive become, & Ive grown to accept myself exactly as I am
(especially the dorkiness)!
No one should have to live in a world where theyre constantly putting up fronts.
Accept who you are & just live your life the way you want to. Thats the only way youll
ever be truly happy.
102 Views
Sanjeev
Kumar, Some moments teach you more about life then books
A phone call and knoweldge from 2 institutes changed my life.
Before writing my story , my English is not good so I appologies for my English.
I am an Engineering graduate . My college is not good for placement. We had only 2

ocampus placement and I didnot get placed in those 2 companies. After the last
semester exam i was waiting for results and also side by side I was preparing for job
interviews . After 2 weeks my nal semester result came and I got back in wireless
communication subject(I was expecting because i didnot write exam well) . so now i
was confused what to do and I didnot tell in home also that I got back. I thought after
giving for revaluation if i donot pass then I will tell in home. So, I was thinking what to
do till that time. If I will simply sit in home parents will doubt that something is
wrong. So I thought , I will tell in home that I am not interested in job now and I will
go for higher studies. I convinced my parents and I joined Vani GATE coaching in
Bengaluru.GATE is entrance exam for joining M.TECH. Classes were going ne and
preparation was also good. After two months my revaluation result came and I passed
that subject. Now my mind got diverted towards job. I passed out my B.E in 2011 and
in 2011 very less company were recruiting. I attended some company but got rejected.
I felt devasted when I failed in a core company that too in the last round in month of
December 2011. Company was a VLSI company and It was best oppurtunity for me to
go in VLSI eld. I got frustated because of not getting job in that company. Now I was
thinking whether I should stop looking for job and study for GATE 2012. I was
confused about my career. After that core company rejection I thought job is not for
me , I should go for Higher studies. So it was around end of december 2011 and after 1
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Month I had GATE 2012 exam. So , I again started preparing for it and preparation was
not upto the mark. I wrote the exam and I knew will unk and I unked GATE 2012.
Now I was totally confused and depressed . I was jobless no money and I used to feel
ashame to ask money from parents . Whenever I used to see in FB my college friends
getting placed and I am jobless,I used to get demotivated So i started thinking about
job and my mind got diverted towards job and this time I was thinking of job and
money only. In home also parents were worried about me. So, now I decided to join
some software training institute which will help me in getting job. So, I joined
Teachguru foundation for learning embedded in month of April 2012. There I learnt
C, UNIX under subhas ku sir. He is awesome. He used to motivate us a lot. It was 2
months course. I completed the course in july but after completion of course I donot
know I was not interested for software jobs. Inside still my heart was with core
company. So I thought this time I will do self prepartion for GATE 2013 with focused
mind and also I will keep looking for job side by side . If i get job I will join it and I will
continue with my prepration. I started my prepration from august 2012. Also, side by
side I was looking for job and I was hoping I will get some call for interviews but I did
not get. I used to apply for so many jobs but never got call. Now because of this I used
to feel demotivated sometime and now some relatives started to demotivate me for
not getting job and I lost my concentration on GATE prepration again . And I was like
not again. This ruined my prepration and in month of December 2012 ,again I was out
of track . History was repeating. I was jobless, relatives used to call me and my
parents to insult me for not getting job. My parents were worried about me. I used to
tell them donot worry everything will be ne but inside I know how easy it was to say
but so dicult in real . My friends were always there to motivate me. One ne
afternoon a miracle happened before GATE 2013.
Actually in December 2011 , I had applied in a consultancy which recruites contract
engineers for Defence organisation like DRDO etc. My best friends forced me to apply
in this consultancy. But I left hope on that consultancy after july 2012 because many
of my friends who applied along with me got call after 2 months and also from july
2012 batch passed out. So, i thought why they will take a 2011 batch now. I left hope
and I had forgotten about that consultancy also. So comming back to 1 week before
GATE 2013 . It was around 4pm and I was taking a nap. A phone call came and I was in
sleep mode and the call was from some unknown number. I was like who is
disturbing my sleep and I thought of rejecting it. But I donot know what happend to
me at that instance that instead of pressing reject button , I pressed accept button
and a lady was speaking on other line. She told they are calling from consultancy
where I registered 1 year back and they have shortlisted my resume for recruitment
drive which was going to get held after 1 week. My sleep was gone. I was so excited
when I heard that line. They told me they will conduct interview after 1week. I was so
excited I told them I will come tomorrow and attend interview. But she told me that it
is recruitment drive of 200 people together . I controlled my self and I told Ok. So,
Sunday was my GATE 2013 exam , I wrote it but this time exam was worst then Last
GATE. But this time I was not worried because I was more excited about consultancy
recruitment. Monday I attended written test. I cleared written. My GATE prepration
helped me a lot in clearing written test. Next day was interview. It was good . My
embedded institute course helped me. I got result after one month and I got selected
for the job. I worked there for 2 years and now I am working in MNC company.
Below are the things which changed my life-

1. Phone call from consultancy. This I would say a miracle or a chance by GOD given
to me for my career.
2. GATE coaching institute where I learnt actually what is ELECTRONICS AND

Communication engineering and I could clear written test in that recruitment drive.
3. Teachguru foundation where subhas sir motivated me and taught me embedded
and because of him I cracked the interview .
These 3 were life chaging moment for me. Internet

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So, never loose hope. Always be motivated.

Life is full of adventure and anything can happen in life any time so keep learning.
Mohit
Gupta, Management consultant who has also been a sailor and
call center executive
There is religion philosophy psychology and so much else to help dene some
answers. But for me it is some of the statements that were made dierent people I met
worked or lived with that has helped wade through the ups and downs.
1. "Whatever it is we have to enjoy everyday" - collegue at onsite assignment
2. "You don't have to sleep necessarily to prepare for the next day, good
relaxation can work better at times" - German tourist I met in Kolkata
3. "If trained properly human body can sustain any amount of physical strain" -
uncle who was in the army
4. "When the chapter is over you only remember the good parts" - ex shipping
colleague
64 Views
Prince
Campbell, I live in the real world. I hope my answers reect that.
A lot of books and people opened my eyes to a lot of things but the one line that
changed my outlook on a lot of things was from the movie 'Fight Club'.
"The things you own end up owning you."

1.2k Views View Upvotes Answer requested by 1 person
Polly
Smith, Know the odd thing about some stu
Written Sun
In spite of being brought up in a strict Catholic household, at around the age of 16 I

suddenly stopped believing in any kind of God. I realised there was no one in charge
to look after me or x the bad stu, which could happen to anyone, no matter how
nice a person they were.
The revelation, far from depressing me, made me realise that I was the boss of my
own life, that my happiness was my own responsibility, and that I shouldn't rely on
others to show me their way.
59 Views
Harsh
Gagrani, Law Graduate. Entrepreneur.
Written Feb 2, 2013
When you grow up you tend to get told the world is the way it is and youre life is just to
live your life inside the world. Try not to bash into the walls too much. Try to have a nice
family, have fun, save a little money.
Thats a very limited life. Life can be much broader once you discover one simple fact:
Everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no
smarter than you and you can change it, you can inuence it, you can build your
own things that other people can use. Internet
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Once you learn that, youll never be the same again.
- Jobs
Vijayaragavan
Venkararathinam, Superhero nerd. INFJ.Entrepreneur.
Ex Founder and CEO of @thecrawlsh.Ex @Infosys.Ex @tsc. Currently
@freshdesk. I w...
From Ayn Rand "I started my life with a single absolute: that the world was mine to
shape in the image of my highest values and never to be given up to a lesser standard,
no matter how long or hard the struggle"
Nagabhushan.
M.
N, Pragmatist
No one is completely good or bad. Accept people as they are. A person who might
seem good to you today might seem bad one year from today. It's not because they
turned to be bad from being good all of a sudden. It's because you were blind to this
side of them all these days and chose to see it only now.
The same person whom you think of as a bad guy might be a hero to someone else.
Robinhood was a nightmare to the rich but at the same time he was a hero gure to
the poor. If your girlfriend/boyfriend breaks up with you to marry the person of
her/his parents choice you'll think that they are bad but they were good to their
parents.
Life is a mix of good and bad. So are people. Accept this fact. Forgive and move on when
people wrong you. It's not that they wanted to hurt you. It was just that they couldn't see
the wrong in that. Make peace.
74 Views
Catherine
Webb, beginner
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Everything is temporary.
Make the most what you like about it and know that those things you don't like will be
over soon.
I think knowing this makes my life better.

Cal
DeBouvre, I'm not dead yet, right?
To paraphrase my grandfather, "there is no reason to get in the gutter with them."
This was retold by my mother, who heard it after some hurtful thing a guy she was
seeing did when they were teenagers. What grandad was trying to say is that
responding to a wrong in-kind is only going to bring you to that person's level, and
that you should think long and hard about where they're coming from. It isn't always
easy or satisfying to take the high road, but grace and maturity cost you nothing.
207 Views
Jill
Uchiyama, one of billions
That therapy in and of itself is neurotic in practice.

Alexander
Anlyan, Writes poetry, sings, and sometimes smiles & weeps
simultaneously.
Written Jul 2, 2013
That I have become who I aspired to be but was assuming that the world around me
would respond positively to conrm my accomplishment, when instead, It was the
end, for me, of having that expectation and the beginning of a need to practice,
focusing on my gifts and my joy while awaiting an assignment.
788 Views
David
Osborne, Just me
Written Wed
The day I learned to be a mind reader - of sorts.
This may not actually be the single insight that most changed my life, but its
certainly in the top 3; and since I rely on this insight almost every day its certainly
been very important to me. Anyways
In my early 20s I was a fresh college grad, and had just moved to a new city and
started my rst job in the real world. As luck would have it I did know someone else
who was also graduating from college and moving to the same city, so I ended up
sharing an apartment with this person. It was someone that I had known since
elementary school, and although we were never close friends and although I had
some reservations about rooming with the person, it was nice to have at least one
friend in this very new situation. Very soon, however, it became clear that we were
NOT compatible as roommates.
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Some details are lost to my memory, but I do remember being very surprised that my
roommate had a sudden, very loud, and very emotional response to the mere
suspicion that someone - me, obviously - had possibly used one of his kitchen
utensils. In reality I had all my own utensils thanks entirely to my moms fear that I
would never survive the real world without a complete set of kitchen tools and dining
ware (thanks mom, love you!). So I had no need to borrow roomies things, and I
knew for certain that I had not done so either purposely on by accident. But during
this blow up I was accused of not only using his things, but of purposely doing so
rather than using my own (for some nonsensical reason), and to cap it o I was a liar,
and a sneak, and not to be trusted.
During this exchange, it suddenly occurred to me that my roommate was actually

describing himself very accurately! I also suddenly realized exactly why we had never
become close friends during all those years in school together. The more I thought
about my interactions with him over those years, as well as some of the stories that he
had told me, I realized that HE was not only a liar and a sneak, but he KNEW he was a
liar and a sneak. The problem was he didnt realize that other people were NOT like
him in those ways. In psych terms, he had a model of the world that was based on his
awareness of himself through his thoughts, inclinations, and actions. But he was very
certain that everybody else was identical to him (fortunately this isnt true) and so he
assumed that everyone else thought like him, and was likely inclined to do the things
that he did or was inclined to do - in other words, he believed everyone else shared the
same model of the world that he did.
In that moment, I had the insight that I should not only be cognizant of the words and
actions of others, but also that its of equal importance to think through the likely
motivations behind their actions and words. And that those motivations are the key
to understanding that persons model of the world. Once you have a pretty good idea
of that persons model, youre now fairly able to predict their words and behaviors
about other situations. You can now use this to start building an understanding of
someones model, and then gain a deeper understanding of them that you have not
yet had the chance to do through direct observation. Simple examples of this are that
a liar fears being lied to, and a thief fears being robbed, and a cheating partner fears
being cheated on. Their defense mechanisms give away their own inclinations. Im
not suggesting that this is a 100% read on someone, because people also fear being
repeat victims of the same thing and so they become cautious of things that have
happened to them in the past, but this is too valuable of a data point to be ignored or
excused away.
Most people will interact with you as if you are thinking and reacting just like them,
so this really isnt as hard as it seems to do. The hard part is remembering to focus on
building up your understanding of their model of the world, rather than becoming
stuck thinking through your model of the world alone.
103 Views
John
Dennis, Science and Enlightenment fan
The single insight that changed my life happened one day after some very long
experiences. Realizing that whenever you have to make really big decisions (career,
school, marriage, taking risks, quitting jobs, breaking up etc) it is important to step
back a little and take at least 10 hours to think about the decision. Making compulsive
choices always led to later regrets for me. I realized that really taking time to think
when it comes to lifes biggest choices/decision is really important for you and your
quality of life. I had to learn this concept the hard way-by trial and error. Luckily if
you consider applying this insight it will save you tons of time and potential pit falls.
127 Views
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Lisa
Galarneau, Advice is free
Love and kindness are easier and more fun than fear and anger.
Paul
Selesko
Written Mon
A great teacher I had in my early twenties told me this:
In order for you to be alive, sitting in front of me right now, your parents both had to
survive and reach sexual maturity and succesfully concieve. In spite of all the risks
present in everyday life: car accidents, medical issues, war etc.
In order for them to have been born, your grandparents had to survive to be old
enough to procreate and do so succesfully, and your grandparents parents also had to
survive and procreate, and their parents before them...
Think of all the wars in history, and all of the epidemics,the black plague for example,
that wiped out massive portions of the worlds population, every single one of your
ancestors was one of the very lucky few who survived the black plague.
What about all the famines throughout history? Your ancestors survived them all!
The crusades, murderous warlords like Ghengis Khan who slaughtered millions,
Spanish u, cholera , the civil war, WW1, WW2...
EVERY SINGLE ONE of your ancestors, without exception, was one of the lucky few
who survived...EVERYTHING!
It cannot be any other way, or you would not be here right now.
There is...in fact, there absolutely must be ( the fact of your sitting in front of me is the
proof), a totally unbroken chain of procreation from you going all the way back
through millions of years to the very rst life forms. A totally unbroken chain.
This little 5 minute talk changed everything for me, it lled my heart with such strong
feelings of " Happy to be ALIVE!" , I have been cultivating that great feeling for thirty
yrs. I don't need anything to be happy....I am happy just by being alive!
45 Views
Rishabh
Sharma, Life is philosophy
Written 6h ago
Mai zindagi m kabhi Kash nhi kahna chahta ( I don't want to 'If' in my life)
It is a dialogue from Shahrukh Khan's movie - Chalte-Chalte. When I rst heard this
dialogue, it stuck in my mind. It has a very deep meaning. One should not regret in
life if he/she could have given more eorts then results might be dierent.
This is the very moment where you can live your dream or leave it. Give your full soul
to your eorts. No stone should be unturned. In the end you should be satised with
your eorts.
40 Views
Trevor
Carter, Software Consultant
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Something Bruce Lee once said changed the way I lived my life. The quote goes, "be
like water". When you conne yourself to a specic role in life, or you limit yourself
by thinking you are an expert at something, etc... then you have solidied mentally,
and you are no longer as adaptable. Our species is here today because we have been
able to adapt.
"You pour water into a cup, it becomes the cup." Like water, you are never conned.
One minute you're a cup, the next minute you're crashing over some rocks. As long as
you keep owing you won't become stagnant.
Praveen
Awasthi
That you can say NO to things you don't want to do and the person will understand.
Amanda
Chatterton, Optics Graduate Student
Updated Dec 8, 2010
Realizing the value of my time and attention and how to respect how they are spent.
- Identify the energy vampires (people/activities that just consume and give nothing
back) in your life and consider the time you have wasted on them. Then imagine how
much better things would be if you focused all that time and attention on matters of
greater importance!
Anonymous
Being your own worst enemy does not mean down-talking yourself to everything, but
realizing that when you have everything you've wanted in front of you and you reject
it, you are the one who had been sabotaging every little progress you've wanted to
have in your life, when it's so clear there is no one to blame to, taking action is the
only thing you can do to ght your own demons.
James
Pay, Watch ones health.
The idea of working all the time was eventually going to take its toll on you in ways
that were just not worth the risk in the long run. One needs to nd time to enjoy
thyself in ways other than working; if you enjoy this sort of thing. The saying "all work
and no play makes Jack a dull boy", is very true. This is even more so when your
mother tells you so. Mine use to tell of this many times when IO was growing up. The
time I spent doing work was so extensive in my life that in time it took its toll on me.
This was not just simple things either. I literally became quite ill due to this type of
behavior.
It was over a period of many years that I began to realize that the true cause of
many things in me,that were negative, came from the actions I took upon me, in me
past. Although the period of time was short in duration, the results were on the verge
of devastating to my overall health. Recovery tookInternet
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many years and at the present
dates I am better,yet, I can still feel some of the eects of this behavior traveling
through my body,mind,soul.
For me, the lesson learned at this time is to give oneself time to "smell the roses",
and through this you will avoid negative ends like those I went through years ago.
Although one may have great intentions in life. The idea of working this hard, as I did,
is not worth the conclusions it could bring to the world/universe. The idea of creating
a balance in ones life is better.
Ron
Blouch, Meditator for fourteen years, meditation teacher for eight.
Written Tue
That I am neither my thoughts nor my feelings.
In my second formal meditation sit in December 2004 I was in immense mental and
physical distress while aggressively forcing myself to attempt to remain in
meditation. As the discomfort passed levels I could tolerate taking me into mental
and physical torment I somehow remained sitting and eorting to concentrate. Then
something never-before-experienced and totally unexpected happened: in a single
instant it all went away.
In a very real but impossible-to-describe sense I went away as well.
I was there and not there simultaneously. It was an intensely direct experience of a
Schroedingers Cat-like state. Cognitively impossible in normal waking consciousness
yet as real as the words on this page when encountered.
I went from chaos to silence in one moment. No thoughts. No feelings. Full

awareness. Perfect clarity.
At rst it seemed empty.
Then it seemed full.
I later discovered that rather than empty it is best described as formless.
After about 5 minutes I returned to normal and the thinking mind and feeling body
resumed.
I had no idea what had happened to me. I was not seeking enlightenment and knew
nothing about it. I had been meditating because someone I trusted suggested it would
help me.
The experience repeated from time time over the next few years.
Each time I became better able to understand the relationship between that self that
remains present when all the other selves are gone and the arising phenomena of life.
That understanding began to slowly, and sometimes not so slowly, change everything
about me. I went from being a miserable, angry helpless victim to an engaged,
intense, full participant in life.
It has been a remarkable ride so far. It is neither over nor slowing down.
118 Views
Jan
Singer
Written Tue
Getting over myself. That also means dumping ego and wishing for things I really do
not need. That includes massive wealth, power and prestige.
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I have a friend whos wife has been suering from motor neuron disease and is slowly
dying every day. His life is one of constant care. He has been close to death himself
with colon cancer and stomach cancer. He lives for her.
I remind myself that my time is my most precious commodity and my time must go to
the highest bidder. The highest bidder is my immediate family.
It is dicult to actually change your priorities. We are almost programmed at birth to

work hard and earn money so that we can support our families. We are then
conditioned to demonstrate our love by the giving of lavish gifts. I guess we have to
because we spend most of our time making the money and convince ourselves that
we do it for our familys benet. Its a guilt trip thing.
In the era that I grew up, my mother was both a mother and a father because my
father was too busy building his business. Now both parents go out to work because
they feel they need to to buy a house, pay the mortgage and have two holidays a year.
Eagerness to earn big money is kind of self defeating as it pushes house prices up.
Cause and eect.
Most marriages nowadays last an average of ten years. Then the lawyers split up the
assets and dissolve the partnership. What a waste of time.
Why do we put up with this? Where is the sense in it all? Why do we continue to give
away our most precious commodity to things that dont matter. If you had one week
to live before you instantly drop dead, you would be spending with the ones that
mean the most to you or being a complete arsehole and doing totally selsh things. I
think you know which category you are in. But I doubt you would spend that time
working.
I am good at my job and I get results. I am at an age where I could retire. But I choose
not to. I can nd a balance between work and home life and I do not put work at the
front. I am paid for my time and not for my expertise, knowledge or skills. If I thought
that, then my salary would not cover them and I would be miserable. I give part of my
life to work, but not enough to cause me misery at home. I have little trust in anyone
else because they have egos, ambition and a mindset to get to the top by treading on
others. I watch them rocket to the top and watch them wiz past as they crash and burn
as they hit the bottom hard. They have been used up, chewed and spat out.
Happiness is being true to yourself. Knowing what should be done but never oering
unsolicited advice to others. The cocks dont like it. Watch and listen to others and
only then can you work out who is useful to you. There are very few who are useful as
the majority are fakers that will take it all anyway. I dont spend my time thinking
about the injustice. I dont even gloat when I hear the temporary high yers become
ruined. Some will slip away from their overspending on cars, houses and the trinkets
of perceived success by ling for bankruptcy. I dont let myself feel sorry for the
Banks loss as they know the risk and brought it on themselves through pure greed. I
have fallen many times from high points and high earnings. Nothing scares me more
than thinking I am overpaid for my job. But I always nd a way to survive when I hit
rock bottom. Whenever I have found myself made redundant after turning a loss
making business into a successful business - I enjoy taking the business with me after
collecting redundancy packages. Business is about people getting along with people
and building trust. Branding is something we get sucked into as is marketing it is
easily lost overnight when trust has been lost. I like building a new business and
when it is doing nicely I sell it and move on. It has served its purpose and is no longer
my problem if it then fails.
Having a good memory helps. I have a near eidetic memory and I always have. I
remember faces and names and everything about a person from the very start of
meeting them. This come in handy when you get a dierent story from them about
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their life. I dont challenge them or embarrass them. I drop them. Its a simple and
nicely uncomplicated rule I have developed.
Do I care if anyone reads this and it changes their life? What do you think?
41 Views
Alia
Verma, reader
Tenth boards is the most important exams you will ever have. Just give them
properly, then you can enjoy.
Just give IIT, then you can enjoy.
In the engineering college, just study for four more years and you can enjoy after
that.
After we graduate, Just nd a job then you can enjoy.
After nding a job, its time to get married.
In Short Life Sucks

Arsne
Hodali, Web Novels Writer
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Shashank
Peri, Jedi since 1992
"Youtube is not just for watching movie trailers and stand up comedies...Use it well"
My cousin brother told me this when he saw me sitting day after day watching videos
for entertainment. One day he lost it and very calmly he said the above lines.
And since then I have been learning python and r programming.
Getting pretty good at it too (at least I feel so). :)
Probably it was just the timing of it.

Soumya
S.
Mohanty, Independent Graphic Designer
I've only had one problem - people, the wrong kind, the not-my-type, the
incompatible ones, the not-so-nice ones, basically people - which is now not a
problem anymore because of the insight - People never change. So, make your
decisions and choices accordingly. Also, people treat you not how you are but how
they are. So, don't take it personally and consciously choose to interact more with
people who are like you. If you are strong, honest, and kind, choose people who are
strong, honest, and kind for close relationships. 'Blue skies and sunshine guaranteed.'
:P
286 Views
Pranay
Kumar, Aced it.
1) I and only i am responsible for my feelings and actions.

and
1) You should give zero f**** to events and situations you can't control.

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Diane
Shatto, I always listen to advice from people who value integrity
more than all else.
A professor told me its 'perfectly okay to be out of sorts.' I had been judged for that all
my life. To hear that changed my entire being inside and out and instantly I accepted
myself for who I was and never looked back.
Jordan
Enger, Abstract deep ideas are my favorite thing to think
about
It was on some crazy inspirational wall paper. Normally I'm not one for silver bullet
quotes but it struck a nerve. "Shoot for the moon, if you fall short you will land among
the stars"
58 Views
Ed
Gioja, I've been doing life for over 55 years now. I've learned a thing
or two.
I was going through a very tough time in my teenage years. I had a counselor tell me
something that has stuck with me, and that I have clung to, for 40+ years now:
There are two kinds of problems in the world:
Problems you can do something about and problems you can do nothing about.
Learn to live with the latter. Spending time and eort on them is simply a waste of
life energy and resources.
For the former:
1. Break it down to manageable pieces
2. Make a plan for each piece
3. Determine what you need to accomplish that plan
4. Work the plan
Many people get 1-3 and then fail to do 4.
I kid you not, this very simple advice has gotten me through many "issues," both
personal and professional.
Gordon
Adams
Written Wed
For years I my position on rearms was as follows. I choose not to own rearms, its
my business. You choose to own rearms ,its your business. Then came the Sandy
Hook massacre when I lived in Newtown, CT. It was devastating for everyone living in
Newtown and most people in Connecticut and around the nation. And frankly,
massacre doesnt begin to cover the carnage. Can you picture what nine to eleven
high powered rounds hitting each 35 to 40 pound body leaves behind?
I realized then my benign attitude towards rearms was dangerous. The registration
of arms and background checks is not infringement. These are common sense
proposed rules designed with public safety in mind. The perception it is otherwise is
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pornographic. Our founders were very concerned with both public safety and
personal safety. That public safety is endangered by a haphazard ownership of arms is
not what the founders intended. Nor did they intend to promote the anarchy which
comes of unlimited ownership of rearms. It is not commonly known that Sam
Adams and others of the founding generation were not happy with the Second
Amendment. They wanted another Amendment to fully guarantee the unimpeded
right to own arms. That this never gained traction among the founders should be
instructive to all sides on this issue.
145 Views
Mitesh
Sharma, Want to build something which can help make this
world a better place. Developer
When i was in 10th standard, i didn't study much and thought that God can help me
get good marks. I gave exam with best eorts under limited study done. After exam, i
use to go to temple twice a day and use to spent lot of time there just to get good
marks. For continuous two months, i prayed to God and asked him only one thing,
good grades. But result came as expected. He didn't help me, not even a help of single
grade. That day i realized that God is not there to help you, he is just a believe. Its you
who do what you want to get, and only hard work can help you reach your goals.
100 Views
E.
Beth
Allan, curious and curiouser
Written Mar 1, 2013
Reality is ltered through your thoughts, and your thoughts create your reality.
Anthony
Yaniero, Experienced in Sales, Small Business, Custom
Manufacturing,
If you do good.you get good..my father (who passed many years ago) wrote this
in my 8th grade graduation yearbook. It made little sense then but made more sense
with time. After a few years.a few mistakes and some accomplishments, it made a
bit more sense. After a few more years.a few more mistakes and some more
accomplishments.it makes even greater sense. I am moving past mid-life at the
moment and things are not out in front any longer but rather beginning to make their
way back to my rear view. This set of words means more now than ever before, it is a
simple ideas that came from wisdom. The type of wisdom that comes only with
experience.
I understand this set of words more now and most likely will get it even more 30 years
from now. I am just glad I have begun to get it. The interpretation will certainly
change from person to person. For me it is to create balance in the universe and put
out positive energy in our microcosms. It is very much like Eastern Philosophy. My
father did not study philosophies nor did he even take it into account when he wrote
it . He may have heard it from someone in his life. I will never know. But we would all
benet from doing a little good.!

Robert
Hegwood, Teacher, writer
Ask
Written Octor16,
Search
1. If one must judge, it is better to err on the side ofInternet

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mercy.
2. We all busy ourselves trying to write our names with pens of iron on tablets of
water.
3. I discovered I had much more in common with humanity than I once thought
possibleboth the good and bad.
4. There is a belief among the Orthodox that we do not choose our icons, they choose
usor rather their Saints doso when I pause to look at my icons, I am often moved
to tears to consider that such great and holy souls have the even the remotest of
interest in mewho am I but dust and ashes. It also reminds me how far I've got to go
if God sends such heavy hitters into my life.
For example, I once asked a relative who was overseas in Greece to procure for me an
icon of St. Silouan of Mt. Athos. Not being Orthodox, or speaking Greek, he brought
me back one which he thought looked similar enough to the image like I had
forwarded to him. It was St. Nectarios. When I looked up his life I was amazed to nd
out how many parallels there were between the course of our lives. He had diculty
keeping a job through no fault of his own, as did I; he often was left with little or
nothing except the kindness of strangers, as was I; he became a teacher and dealt with
troublesome students, as did I. Here was a saint who could really understand my
frustrationsthough to be sure his were much more severe than mine. I also learned
he wrote one of the most beloved of Orthodox hymns, Rejoice O Unwedded Bride
and I too write both verse and proseit was amazing to discover St. Nectarios had
taken an interest in meall the way over in Greece. His appearing was an unexpected
joy.
Ralph
du
Plessis, SEO & Social Media Consultant
Written Jan 4, 2013
Perhaps the thing I turn to most in times of despair or when I lack motivation...
You will inevitably end up or stay where you spend your time looking so look "up" and
things tend to get better if you put some eort in, look "down" and you get sucked
back into the dark place.
Never do anything you know you are going to regret.
You make your own luck. Stop waiting for it to land on your doorstep.
Nikhil
Abhyankar
Written Dec 8, 2014
Have you ever envied someone for something they have and you don't?
Guess what, the same people could be envying you for something that you have and
they don't!
Everyone has his or her insecurities, fears, feelings and vulnerabilities.


Ask or Search Quora
Anonymous Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
Written Mon
Theres no such thing as magic. Anything that youInternet

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want to accomplish does not
happen by wish craft.
Nothing succeeds like sustained, consistent eort.
It doesnt sound very profound but it is a subtle lesson that successful people grasp
early in life while others never quiet get.
32 Views
Greg
Monks, works at Musicians
Written Mon
In a word- Logic. I was taking philosophy in university in 1974, and Logic was part of
the package. When it came time to study Logic, it was like switching the lights on in a
darkened house for the very rst time and nding it cluttered with stinking garbage,
like bigotry, religion, Hate, the cancer that is Consumerism, a veritable mountain of
lth and intellectual incest. Logic allowed me to see for myself all the things that are
wrong with the world.
Just as illuminating a revelation was that people who know Logic are in the minority,
that most people are idiots, as I myself was before.
Logic teaches you that Humanity is incredibly stupid and selsh- and not the
intelligent bipedal ape it thinks it is.
It also teaches you great patience, and compassion, because there but for the dog-doo
eye.
51 Views
Mark
Joyner
Written 1am
I read the answer from Marshall Karp and I said yeah, that sounds pretty good but
What is the single insight that most changed my life? It was February 8th 1978
when my girlfriend dragged me to the Las Vegas convention center to listen to Billy
Graham preach. I thought omg what a holy roller. I gured I go to church and then
hit the caSINos for some real fun. I was 27 years old and I sure as hell didnt want
anything to do with Jesus. I had spent my whole life ghting and fornicating and
would kick the crap out of anyone who ever tried to tell me about Jesus. I was so bad
that I enlisted in the army so I could go over to Vietnam and kill people. I volunteered
for Vietnam ve times while I was still in basic training so I could go and kill and
wound and mam and destroy. I wanted to be able to rape and pillage and plunder and
every other evil thing that I could think of with impunity. I was absolutely the farthest
thing in the world from a christian. There was just no way in hell I was going to get
born again. You would have a better chance of me kissing a dogs ass in the middle of
a busy intersection with thirty minutes to draw a crowd, than ever see me become a
christian. But the truth is, when I sat there and I listened to Billy Graham preach that
gospel and dont ask me how, I just knew that the things that he was telling me were
true! So yeah, I got ugh, born again. But my problem was that frigging bible. I had
always believed, aw, the bible, Its been handed down, passed down, rewritten,
waterized and twistized..how can ya be sure that its true?
Well I spent the next 28 years in university studying that bible in seventeen languages
and twenty nine translations so I could determine for myself the validity of the
writings and yes I do believe that it is the word of God. Now Im not asking you to
believe that its true. How could you just take my word for it. I never took anyones
word it. But I will tell ya, it has the most wonderful promises of eternal life in it. Ha!
Eternity! It dont sound like a long time if ya say it fast! Ha! Ha! Thats funny huh?
Anyway, dont think Im trying to convert ya because Im not. Its just that you asked
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What is the single insight that most changed my life? And now you know. It was
the day I got the breath of eternity put on me. And like I said, I read the answer from
Marshall Karp and yeah, that sounds pretty good but that only lasts for about a
hundred years but eternal life that lastswell you know.
John 3:16 Baby!

50 Views
Clay
Babin, values perspective, when he can get it.
That I could change the way I think, by deliberately breaking out of circular patterns
of hopelessness and futility. I'm subject to depression, so that was quite an eye opener
for me.* I don't actually utilize it as much as I did when I was younger, as I've
accumulated a little perspective, and found a few other ways of dealing with it. I
should get back to it.
Losing myself in my work, which is currently caregiving, lets me put my problems on

the back burner for awhile, as I'm able to focus on my clients' needs almost
exclusively for long periods of time. Helping others also gives me a lot of satisfaction,
and counter balances my self esteem issues somewhat. It seems like a worthwhile way
to spend my time.
Additionally, doing something creative helps, whether it's writing, dinking around
with my apartment, making something with my hands - tends to get me into a
dierent frame of mind for awhile.
Pure distraction. Movies and reading, online activities such as playing poker or
gaming, are also helpful at times. Ditto for fooling with my plants, and critters.
Physical activity of most any sort, where I'm up and about, often helps. More
distraction. Mostly this means, for me, cleaning up my home, or my clients', and
straightening up, organizing, rearranging, etc. I should do alot more walking,
preferably in the woods, though.
"Gloom, despair, and agony on me. Deep dark depression, excessive misery. If it
weren't for bad luck I'd have no luck at all. Gloom, despair, and agony on me. " -
HeeHaw theme song
*My answer was meant to end at this point, but Quora found it inadequate and
collapsed it. (It continued to be collapsed until I stuck the HeeHaw thing in at the
bottom. Go gure.) Hence, this became a longer answer about how I deal with my
depression, which wasn't the question. Maybe I'll use this answer elsewhere.
112 Views
Noopur
R
Kalawatia, Revel in this festival, life.
The insight of knowing that you are dierent and you need to embrace it. Often we
are held up in the denitions of others. We want to approve ourselves from somebody
else's perspective. We seek approval and try to compare our lives with others. The
simple realisation that oneself is dierent and acceptance of the same changed my
life.
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All the while I kept curating myself and tried impressing the people in my life and
never realised the same. In the conquest to be liked I forgot what I actually was and at
a very crucial time I realised that my family, my upbringing , my nature was very
dierent from the version I had created for others.
I made peace with it. It took me half of the year to stumble and accept the reality.
Today I don't feel completely satised but I at least know my limits and respect
myself better. I know what I want and I denetely know what I dont.
Joel
V
Benjamin, Caress each moment as you let it go.
After having tried following several dierent religions and sets of beliefs, I suddenly
realized that you can not decide what to believe; you have to discover what you
actually believe. You can't make up answers when you don't know.
This insight freed me from accepting anyone else's set of beliefs. I realized that I was
an atheist. No longer did I have to carry on my back the burden of other people's
superstitions.
Sanjeet
Kumar, Graduate from NIT Allahabad, worked at OBC, loves
movies, tv seriess & cooking
This one line really touched my heart that day.
We are ve friends. One of my friend was selected in Indian air force one and half year
before but he was in waiting list. This year IAF started calling candidates from waiting
list. So we all were waiting for his call letter.
On one ne morning of this summer, we were bathing in middle of Ganga river(water

level was very low ). He suddenly broke the news that he got the call letter last night.
After hearing this we started asking him for party.
We: Bhai party kab de raha hai....(bro, when will you give the party).
We started chanting like party do.. party do..(give party)
He: Bhai bhai party to mai de dunga.. but tum log v aisa kaam karo ki party Lena nhi
Dena pade.
(Bro bro I will give you party but instead of taking party you create such opportunity
to give party )
Party lene ki nhi party dene ki socho...
(Think about giving party instead of taking it...)
I almost cried there.
PS: all of my friends were unemployed that time.

107 Views
Amit
Patel, Life is a university. I am a student, reader, writer and
philosopher in this.
AskMar
Updated or Search
22, 2016Quora Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
Reading. The world of books was the best insight that changed my life.
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Amit likes to enjoy a good book from time to time.
When I was in 8th Grade we had a new principal join our school. This was year 1987.
He started a library in our school. In India the concept of library was rare in schools.
It started with borrowing two books per week. I started borrowing one book and then
two books. Some of my friends did not like reading. They gave me their books to read.
So I started reading 4 to 5 books per week.
Initially they were small story books. Then I started reading novels. As I grew up I was
reading all type of books. Fiction to Non Fiction. Biographies to Business Books.
Every book that held my curiosity. In 3 to 4 years I had become a voracious reader.
My world changed. It improved my communication. It improved my perception. It

improved the way I could think and behave. I would say that it made me a good
human being.
Books gave me a good career. Getting a job. Getting promoted. Achieving my goals. All
my achievements I dedicate to the books I have read. They helped me to succeed.
They even helped me in my failure. Time and again they have proved their worth.
I cannot thank my school principal Mr. Abraham enough. He is the one who
introduced me to this wonderful world of books. Thank you sir where ever you are
and if you are listening.
This is the biggest insight that has helped me in life. And if someone has asked me for
advice to change their life, I have always asked them to start reading for 1 hour a day.
Every day I read for more than 1 to 2 hours. So I am able to read between 1 to 2 books
per week.
Because of this practice every year I am living my life like I have lived 100 years
through the books I read and experience I get.
So start reading and start uncovering the adventures without leaving the cosy comfort
of your home.
With all the reading I do, now I have started writing and building my very rst blog
Amit Patel's Blog - University of Life it would be great if you like it and share it
across to your social circles.
Best of luck and see you on the brighter side of life.

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Mel
Pi, lives in Mumbai, Maharashtra, India
Written Tue
pushing aside everything that doesnt make me better, wiser and wealthier- this
includes people, habits, etc
Balance is the key to everything, although I have pushed aside a lot of people from my
life, I have a few people close to me who are a positive inuence for me.
Meditate everyday, even if its for 10 minutes. Dont listen to what your mind tells you,
especially the negative thoughts. Observe the thoughts as they come and go without
analyzing them(when meditating i.e.) Meditation will boost your growth
39 Views
Charuta
Apte, works at Self-Employment
Written Mon
The single insight that has changed my life on an on-going basis is Its ok. By on-
going basis, I means that it is not enough to think that it is ok, it is important to feel
it at a very deep level.
No matter what, it is ok.
I have had to come to this realization many times,, because every time life throws a
curve-ball, the strong feeling comes up that Its not ok. To go from Its not ok to
Its ok can take days, weeks even months, but the moment that the Its ok
happens, there is a sense of immense peace, comfort, and the feeling that all is right
with the world.
33 Views
Ankita
Sharma, studied at Jawaharlal Nehru School, Bhopal, India
Written Aug 19, 2013
1. "Kuch toh log kahenge, logon ka kaam hai kehna!" This line has changed my life
completely.
2. Life don't oer you second chances. Do what you really want to!
3. Have courage to speak up. They can't read your thoughts.!!
Thomas
Dreiling, MFA from New York University (2010)
Written Wed
At 28 I nally gured out that no matter what I did some people and family would not
like me. The big thing here is that I'm gay and lived in Kansas in 1986. So I put myself
rst and some people liked me and some didnt, exactly the same as before. It is
alright to cut toxic people out of your life, be they friends or family. They can stay
where they are and I moved past them forward.
Sangram
Singh, Entrepreneur, Angel Investor, IT & Law by education.
Written Jun 8, 2013
Well insights continue to come, let me take the liberty to name a few.
1. Life is about relationships more than trophies.

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2. I'd rather be myself than successfull / liked-loved-admired.
3. My parents are important to me.
4. Physical tness can get me mental peace and give me longer life to enjoy and work.
5. Never be rude to anyone.
6. I can dream as big as i want as long as i'm committed to it.
7. The world supports me (surprisingly), as long as i don't step on people's toes.
8. Everyone needs a good friend.
9. Being genuine is a language, its understood by genuine people.
Let me stop there.
Thanks for reading.

Sangram Singh
Able-Partners
896 Views
Henry
Hurd, IT Technology
he right words lift us. Mostly, they help us lift ourselves.
They can kindle your re or fan your ames.
Follow inspirational quotes to help you get a fresh start, nd your path, stand back up
if youve fallen down, and make your dreams happen.
In a gentle way, you can shake the world.
Mahatma Gandhi
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies
within us.
Henry Stanley Haskins
Dont ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive
and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.
Howard Thurman
The best revenge is massive success.
- Frank Sinatra
68 Views
William
Moore, works at Chongqing University of Posts and
Telecommunications
That you MUST be at the very least a little selsh in life to get anything done.
Even if you want nothing from life but to help people, you must learn to be a little
selsh, because you must get yourself into a position where you have a means to help
people.
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Keshav
Gupta
"No one can make you feel bad or devalue yourself without your permission."
Nazif
Ali, silent observer
"Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom" -Aristotle
There are two persons in our mind; rst is the one generating thoughts; second is the
one witnessing them. You are the second one.
Divyaa
Sharmaa, Life Advisor
A single insight that changed my life? Well there's a story I'd like to share which
should suce for an answer.
I had just entered college. a new girl in a new city. I'd come from a well to do family so
obviously I was pampered to the core. I had a decent place to live, got good friends,
had a great time without a care in the world. But one thing that was missing in my life
was true happiness. I had everything one could want but was still not happy inside.
then something happened...
I enrolled for an internship at an NGO in Noida. Mata Bhagwanti Chadha niketan, a

name I would not forget for a long time. The school provided education for the
specially abled. The rst day at that NGO and I was lled with a great sense of
humiliation and goodness. The students and there taught me that there's lot to life
than sitting in a corner and crying. The students, despite their disabilities, had the
smile on their face. They danced, laughed and sang. The teachers were their best
friends. That made me feel how beautiful life reallyh is and there are somethings
money can never buy! I became a better person, started seeing things in a dierent
light and in fact, the whole outlook towards life took a huge turn. I started caring
more, became more humble and haven't regretted that ever since! :)
70 Views
Clayburn
Grin, Living
The realization that God is man-made.

Mike
O'Brien, Lead singer in chart-dodging pop group, Pocketful
O'Nowt.
My moment of truth came when I realised that there were never any real ghosts and
monsters in Scooby Doo, but it was always the person who had warned the gang about
going to the old castle/deserted fairground/run down factory, wearing a rubber mask
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in an attempt to cover up some criminal money making scheme.
Suddenly I knew that I was more perceptive and intelligent than Fred, Shaggy,
Daphne and Velma. And they were teenagers, much older than me, they were
independent, they looked after their own dog, and drove a van. That made me feel
very mature for my years.
Soon after came the realisation that the creators of the show took me for an idiot.
They thought that I woukdnt realise their deception, their formula. Just as they
thought that I wouldn't realise that when one of the characters was being chased
down a long corridor, they would pass the same scenery many times because the
artists only drew a small section of the background and repeated it in a long loop.
Then, as more of a gradual dawning, came the realisation that the majority of
television is a swindle. Poor quality nonsense designed to keep us quiet, keep us
watching, and sell us things, be they spin o products, advertised products, or more
televisions.
From that day forth, I was determined that when I grew up, I would not have a
television in the house, that I would think independently, make my own decisions,
and make something of my life instead of being permanently drawn to indolence in
front of the glowing screen in the corner of the room.
And if it hadntve been for those meddling kids I would have gotten away with it too!
150 Views
Ezra
Goldman, Upshift founder & CEO
Written Jan 2, 2013
Happiness has nothing to do with that which happens outside of you, it's all internal.
Develop acceptance of your situation and you can face anything smilingly.
Lori
Thresher
Written Wed
That you make your own schedule-if it is too full or you dont like it, change it! After
all, it is YOUR schedule.
Before making a big decision you are unsure of wait three days. Look what
happened to Jesus after three days!
Find several ways to do anything, for example; you dont have to bake 8 dozen cookies
for a last minute function. You can buy them, get help to make them, make something
else, hire someone to make them for you, only make 4 dozen, say NO, you cant help
out this time, stop going to the function which requires cookies to be made, etc etc.-
writing several insights to this question instead of only one, for another example.
Delegate.
Read Tony Robbins answer to how to get anything you want
Paint your own picture and step into it (Leo Buscaglia)
Dont believe in No-Win scenarios (Star Trek)
Stop asking everyone what you should do before you ask God what you should do (self
defeating answer on this particular format)!
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Sakshi
Priya, eat-live-learn, quenching for knowledge, epitome of
laziness
Written Feb 7, 2014
Elena
English, Founder and CEO of @SignalMind, the mobile
engagement platform for agencies
This quote: "if you are comfortable, you are not growing."
Nirlendu
Saha, Been there, Done that !
One of my friend told me this when he was drunk. "Right or wrong are just denitions
bro. It's all about the choices." And then. Boom. I was enlightened. Truly.
Sourabh
Gulati, iHUMAN
I am Bipolar..and there was a phase in life when i was so depressed because when I
was in Manic i spoiled my relationship with my parents/siblings, ruined by nances
and was on the verge of getting red. In depression for 3 months i was thinking to end
my life because there was no motto in my life and there was only one thought in my
mind that being Bipolar I will never be able to compete with Normal Persons
One day I was sitting in park and a 6 year old boy was playing with boys in the age
group of around 10-15 years. and he was going down again and again and getting up
each time;and each time his determination was up than previous. And when he
thought he was not doing right to compete he went to his father who was sitting near
by me and reading a novel. He came to his dad and said dad what should I do to score
a goal. His Dad said we will not go home today until you score a goal today and I trust
you for that.
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The Boy went back to eld and scored a goal after 45 min and trust me it was a classic.
I gave a thought to that man dint said any thing extra ordinary to child but that was
enough for Boy. The Next day i booked a ight to my Home and Hugged my father
and rest is (in two years)
1. I bought my own Home In Noida and living happily with my Parents

2.I am married to the Most Beautiful Girl in this World (who was earlier the most
beautiful girl in my oce Need to write this Because otherwise she wont let me would
get angry and delete the answer :P)
3. I am working with World's Biggest Software Company and they are so impressed by
creativity/hardwork that they have oered me to work in exible timings and Work
from Home.
4. I am preparing for ITF/ATP 250 tournaments and as per my coach I can make it by
next year.
All thanks to That 6 year old BOY!!

As someone has said
Failure is not when you fell down; its when you refuses to get UP :))
194 Views
Muhammad
Hazem
Sherif, Yet to be discovered
That I have control over nothing.
I have a little, limited role. I push myself and exert real eort. What comes next is not
under the reins of my will.
Letting go and realizing that trying to play God's role is consuming is one important
life lesson that taught me how to relax and smile peacefully at the fresh start of every
new day.
The obsession with controlling circumstances and people is deadly, simply because it
is of no avail.
Let it be. Sway lightly.

148 Views
Niko
Ranta
Written Feb 4, 2013
It took way too long time to realize that I know myself better than anyone else, and
that I shouldn't feel bad for not doing something someone wants, only if I care about
them and it makes them feel bad... Blergh, that "clear" button should clarify my
thoughts instead of clearing the text eld...
118 Views
Bouthena
Ben
Sedrine, I'm doing a good job keeping myself alive.
Do the right thing in the right time. That's how you get rewarded. If you do the right
thing in the wrong time or any other combination you'll probably gain nothing but
pain.
Anthony Robbins said this. And it works with everything and it's so true.
96 Views
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David
Zweier, Leader, Content Marketing, GLS, at D+H
Written Aug 21, 2013
If you don't have a plan for when your plan fails, then you've got a pretty bad plan.
Bobsy
Jackson
Written Sun
I lacked condence and was a little introverted a real stunner of a woman wanted a
realtionship with me.
I though she must be joking surely, so i agreed and went out with her.
anyway, bottom line she told me that i walked around a little timidly, but that i was a
really cool guy and get heaps of attention, and i should be real condent about
myself, because i had it going on proper.
I practiced being more condent, because i had faith in her and what she said to me,
and my life improved dramatically, and i changed from a meek type into a real
dynamic go getter party animal ( in a nice way). I started to believe in myself, and no
longer let more condent people make me hold myself down.
LM
MacDougall
Written Mon
When I discovered that people are supporting a corrupt system of government that
directly leads to the killing of children and other atrocities.
There is no reason to support corruption.
There is no justication for killing children.
Have you sent your Notice to Government yet?
Peace.
33 Views
Emmanuel
Surendra, works at The Malaysian Insider
Written Tue
Its the journey not the destination.
I was always the guy who dreamed big and planned in advance. Yes, I also believed in
New Years resolutions and, just like many, never fullled one of them. My desire to
grow never paralleled my actions and, if anything, I became a serial procrastinator.
But through it all, I realized that what was holding me back was my focus on the
destination. That is, I looked at the goal, the end result and failed to envision the
journey or the road it took me to get there.
For example, I want to run a marathon. So, I see myself crossing the nishing line and
with people cheering me on (hey, its called fantasizing for a reason!) but I fail to
comprehend the pain of just running the race or waking up in the wee hours of the
morning to train.
Worse, to stick to a routine when life throws one ofInternet

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its signature curveballs at you:
overtime at the oce, a sick spouse, etc.
I also fail to factor in failure. Now, how many of us are even prepared to deal with
failure? I am not but reality is failure is as real as the food on my table.
I have learned that once I set out to do something, the journey is xed. Thats not
what I am supposed to think about all the time.
I am supposed to look at the road ahead and tell myself that Ill survive this but, boy,
its sure going to be a tough one.
75 Views
Anonymous
Updated Apr 7, 2014
You don't get any AIR / CAT Percentile / GPA for your performance in life at the end !
Everybody is just DEAD ....
Edit - AIR refers to All India Rank in IIT-Joint Entrance Exam , CAT is management
entrance exam in India . Both exams are some of the most competitive exams in the
world in terms of selection rate.
Veronica
Rose, Recovering narcissistic abuse survivor
Written Mon
I remember the moment with excruciating clarity. I was in my late 30s, a married
mother of 2, and I still had no clue I had been narcissistically abused my whole life.
Standing in the middle of the sunny living room, I tried to breathe. For a few years, Id
been trying to gure out who I was, an endeavour kick-started by an email quiz
asking, among other questions, what was my favourite colour, and it took me 2 weeks
to nd the answer. I had thought I was succeeding in knowing myself . . . Until that
moment.
That moment of horror, of a truly nightmarish realisation ripped from inside me by

my husbands stealthily cruel words, obliterated all traces of the sub-tropical warmth
and light permeating the room.
My mind screamed at the oppressive, inner darkness I freefell into.
No one could hear me.
Not even me.
I was dead inside.
My heart was too tired to feel.
My soul had shrivelled long ago.
My inner world was Hell.
After what seemed years of plummeting into the horror of my own making, I blinked .
. . And I was back in my sunny living room, seeing my husbands barely concealed
disinterest, glancing around and noticing my childrens concern, feeling like an alien
in my own life.
*What had happened to me?* Internet

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*Why was I dead inside?*
I saw clearly now the void I had existed in my whole adult life. I didnt know why,
simply that I had.
In that moment, I knew my husband hated me. Maybe more than I hated myself.
In that moment, I knew I could no longer exist as I had been doing for way too long.
And, in that moment, I knew an exquisite clarity of choice: Complete my death of self
by ending my worthless existence. Or somehow, someway, wholly recreate myself and
my life, regardless of how pathetic and useless I was as a human, regardless of
whether that meant I lost my kids and spent my whole life alone.
79 Views
Saurabh
Deshpande, studied at Clemson University
Written Mar 9, 2013
As a Quora user the most insightful thing I realized is that I need to be better at atleast
one of the topic/ eld so that I am able to share my knowledge on this platform like
some of the popular quora users. Sharing is what makes me happy.
Navin
Uttam, Learner , Unlearner and Re-learner
Your time in this world if nite and limited. Time is so much more than money. In the
end you will surely run out of time and most likely money as well if you did not make
most of your time.
Juan
Armando
Written Tue
I will share two I had since the beginning of the year: One I read and one realization I
had while free-writing in my computer.
1.- (From the book 6 pillars of self-esteem): Self-esteem is the reputation we

acquire with ourselves. Think about it, and you will nd proofs of this in your own
life, and can operate with this principle from now on.
2.- (I was thinking about my motivation and why I do what I do, and our innate
tendency to hope for our situation to be perfect so we are spirited in our
job/work/whatever situation we are in): It must be my energy that pushes me
forward; not my surroundings that pull me
These two, inadvertently and gradually have changed: one, how I deal with myself,
and two, my interaction with the outer world.
32 Views
Lauren
Vincent
Montes, former Youth Division, fundraising, modeling
basics at East Coast Pageants (1991)
Ask
Written or Search Quora
Wed Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken
When I realized if someone in Hollywood ever asked who I was(my name) and what
city in California I'm from, I had nothing great in my hometown linked to Hollywood,
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nor was their anything great about Huntington Park in all.
That bothered me so much, that it opened doors to my greatest attemp yet. I was
ready for a new me, to dive into the new. To stir up some dierent schemes I could
delight myself with. The Warner Theatre in my town ia considered historic. I want to
own it and take over many scheduled theatres and turn them into extravagances like
the upkept theatrea in Portugal from 1700th century. But this is not the schemes that
followed.
17 Views
Kok
Ming, Maths Tutor
Knowing that you have control of your life by being aware of your surrounding and
seeing that you have innite choices. being able to control your monkey mind instead
of letting him auto pilot.
48 Views
F.
Andy
Seidl, Chief Information Architect, Airex Inc.; serial
#entrepreneur; #EAI #ontology #dad #hiker #skeptic #guitar #runner (m...
Nothing is supernatural; we are star stu.

Shashank
Gaur, Avid Quoran
Written Jun 7, 2013
It was the yr 2008. I was standing in my balcony just havig some random thoughts.
Then I just started comparing my school life with my college life. I realised that
though I was studying in college nothing had changed much as compared to my
performance in school. My class mates who were ahead to me in school are still ahead
even though we had the same resources at our disposal. Even though i had entered a
new phase of my life but the ratio of academic performance was almost same as of the
previous phase of my life.
Dale
Emery, Consultant to software teams and leaders. Writer. Guitar
player.
Every behavior has a positive intention.

Wyndom
Min, Enlightened Thinker and Prompt Inquirer.
Written Tue
I'm not one to disclose my business so be patient with me. I grew up in an oppressive
household to say the least. By the age of thirteen I'd lock myself into my room and
whisper I'm gay, I'm gay, I'm gay over and over until one day they must have nally
heard me and broke the door and window to get in and handle it. Afterwards I knew
that love no matter what has conditions. I learnt to be patient, and waited ve long
years until I could be free. Once I nally obtained my freedom I realised that our past
does not need to haunt us because we always haveInternet
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tomorrow, the past remains
ingrained in memories we'll never forget but to future is full of possibilities that can
become the present and past, the only two absolutes. I stopped running and realised
that I'd been strong all along, that I was resourceful, resilient and still remained. From
that day forward and now three years later I still live having come to realisation that
we as humans are capable of anything, we can do anything and some can bear with
more. I realised that nothing denes us but us and no one can ever truly take our
freedom away. It's a right we are all born with. I realised that the best rebellion is to be
educated, to the best revenge is to thrive and be happy and the only way to peace to
love and progress. I also realised that our parents have only one true duty and that is
to bring us into this world and anything after that is case by case and depends on the
parents, their duty was accomplished the day you were born and anything else they
did was up to them.
24 Views
Christine
Leov-Lealand, I'm alive and kicking
I was a stroppy super-intelligent kid who saw through people's bs behaviours from a
very young age. The family had a hard time handling me because I'm female and girls
were supposed to put up and shut up. Boys were the ones, no matter how stupid,
whose comments mattered.
In this environment I ran into issues all the time and told devastating truths with the
best. One day when I was perhaps four years old, after another ght for what I saw as
justice (which I was never going to get because mum and dad made me the scapegoat
of the family) my precious grandma took me aside and said You can always wake up
tomorrow and turn over a new leaf. It doesn't have to stay this way.
And I saw then that yes, every day is a new beginning and the bs of the previous day
can be left behind just like turning over the leaf of a book.
64 Views
Pranay
Roy, Data Science Technologist at Einsights (2014-present)
Mind is immensely powerful.

Nancy
Talcott, works at Alot of Places
Written 5h ago
Well, it's not as positive as the other guys, but it's mine. Learning, at the deepest level
of my life, that people cannot be trusted, they lie about the simplest things. But the
biggest lie is they pretend to like me, pretend to be a friend until I speak what I think
because I believe in the 1st Amendments Free Speech clause. As long as I say what
they want to hear or have something they want, we're friends. Once they get it, the lies
& excuses start again until the next time they want something I have. And then they
have the audacity to wonder why I prefer isolation to mingling in groups.
37 Views
Anonymous
Written Mon
The majority is almost always wrong. Whether in stocks or in a creative profession -
the least risky gambit is to bet against large companys vision, an industry standard
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that claims to be the wave of the future, or the next big thing predictions of a pundit
who got famous because or his/her contributions to the last big thing.
18 Views
Vinayak
Pathak, Opinionated
Bayesianism.
Pranav
Majji, works at IITH Student Gymkhana
"In the depth of winter, I nally learned that there was in me an invincible summer."
-Albert Camus
Pongi
Vaper, Continuous education
Written Jan 28
I've had many, especially in last 12.5 years. The one I reect on the most that has
played a big part in, me moving forward, would be
I had just returned home from receiving my one year coin for sobriety. My daughter,
age 14 asked to see it. I handed it to her and she smiled and hugged me. She then
looked to hand it to my son, age 16 and his response was this
No thanks, I remember the rst one he picked up. He then walked out of the room.
At that moment it came to me how much more important my sobriety should be to

me then him or anyone else. That me doing the next right thing should not require a
pat on the back. That becoming a better member of society is the goal, not the
applause of those around me.
That day reminds me that I should be doing the right thing without the expectations
of recieving praise.
95 Views
Arnold
Nitin
M
S, works at Coviam Technology
We are on a path where the destination is certain but the stations and companions we
come across in that path are uncertain. Cherish every moment and every person you
come across.
Agasthya
Kumar, Life is Beeaaauuutiful!! *_*
Written Jun 8, 2016
I guess I learnt a lot from anime. Those anime's changed my life forever. It was
Dragonball Z and Naruto changed my life. Those anime heroes characters name were
goku and naruto . they taught me to never ever giveup or never back down in your
life if you have a problem. They taught me to overcome my negative thoughts into
positive thoughts!! They taught me nothing comes to you if you don't do hardwork!!
They taught me we always struggle at the beginning but if you overcome that fear in
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the beginning there is lots of success at the end!!! There is a supersaiyan in everyone
one of us!! We need to wake him up by doing hardwork and justice to our talent!!!
Cheers! :)
Sarath
Chandra
Vaidyula, Hates status quo
Written Apr 9, 2013
" Fear can hold you prisoner. Hope can set you free."
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Never give up. Hope is a good thing. Maybe the best of things, and no good thing
ever dies.
225 Views
Lalitha
Rajagopal, student
Written Mon
Two years when i was at the lowest point in my life with not having a single clue in my
life, i could have been the worst person on the earth to see every solution as negative.
I saw every opportunity as a threat to my peace and was too perssimitic. The word
positivity never existed in my life until i met a breast cancer stage 4 patient. Despite
ghting for her life, she was always there to make me see light at the end of the
tunnel. She made me see life at a dierent dimension and through her i saw life once
again full of possibilities and positivity. Today i inspire many around me to be
positive and be resilient towards life. Though she is no more in this world, i believe
she is my greatest insight of my strength
165 Views
Abhiram, Take everything positively. Everything has a reason to

manifest!
Written Jan 2
I someone who used to rely a lot on what people said. I used to push myself to
conform to norms. If I didn't I felt I would be alienated. With time I realised all this
conforming and being a people happy maker is one nonsensical ideology.
It is best to follow what one feels like doing. People are always gonna go blah blah
blah and when the time comes, they aren't going to be there for you. You face your
challenges and consequences of your actions by yourself.
Every man for himself.
Living by this mantra has denitely made my life easier. No more people pleasing,
faster decision making capacity. All in all it has juiced up my life. I no longer feel, if I
do like this what will he/she think about me?
Individuality is guranteed!
73 Views
Prateek
Das, works at Deloitte
We can spend eternity trying to reach that ultimate goal which is supposed to unlock
the pandora's box of happiness. The struggle and streamow on this path seldom
allows us to pause and take a look at the little spurts of joy that actully matter. true
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happiness lies not in riches but admiration and self benovelence!!
Christophe
Cop, Master Psychology
Written Jan 27
Probably this: Entropy in thermodynamics and information theory - Wikipedia
When I learned about Maxwells demon and its solution.

13 Views
Minh
Thnh, " Never cruel or cowardly, never give up, never give in. " -
The Doctor
Written Apr 9, 2016
It was indeed a insight i had while reecting. It was more than 4 years ago, just as i
failed my entrance exam to the very school i wished to attend. It delivered a crack to
the thin mirror through which i was perceiving the world from. And that's when i
realized that that blindfold is the reason for my failure. So i took it o, only to nd my
perspective covered by another blindfold and then again i seek for a way to take it o.
It's been a perpetual process for me, to break myself down and x myself up.
72 Views
Anonymous
Written Tue
Im not a very religious person.

But Rick Warrens book A Purpose Driven Life had 1 chapter
that changed my outlook the most. I cant remember the exact chapter.
But his explanation of the correlation between time & love was powerful.
Coming in a strong 2nd was when I was being trained to serve people
with disabilities. Identifying all people as people FIRST dramatically
changed how I see the people I encounter every day.
People who are this.
People who are that.
Its amazing how something so simple can be so profound.
9 Views
Gayle
Castro, I am a Lady Engineer in the making :-)
Be optimistic. That two words I kept on ponder ever since I learn that life is not a bed
of roses. It keeps me alive and going everytime I encounter a mishap in my life. It
really help me a lot not to think so negatively because I know there is reason behind
of everything.
54 Views
Prajwal
Prabhat
In the end, nothing really matters (yeah reminds you of Linkin Park), you have to do
because YOU have to do!
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Charlotte
London
Written Tue
Mine is that no one cares about you as much as you do.
And I dont mean that in a negative way. No one is thinking about what youre doing,
how youre acting, what you said at a party, how you did on the test, whatever, so
dont let it trip you up ever. Only you know what you think about yourself, and the
world sees the projection you give, so you might as well give a damn good one.
Bhanu
Korremula, constant learner
When stopped lying to myself and started being brutally honest with myself.
74 Views
Peixiao
Lee
Written Jun 1, 2016
Someone will laught at you if you try something dierent. But they are just cowards.
Insisting on what you think is right ,let the criticisis be.

28 Views
Michael
Adams, Knowing what drives me, and what stops me
Written Tue
In the Fall of 2013, my life was falling apart. I had a decent job, but my paychecks
couldnt carry my family over the nish line each month. We had been dealing with
mounting medical bills, and I was trying, in vain to start a side business to generate
extra income.
In 2014, I enrolled in a leadership course that required me to really look at how I

operate in the world, and assess my personal integrity. I called people I hadnt spoken
with in years, and took responsibility for things I had done that wronged them in the
past. I attended a four hour classroom every Friday after work, and had a 45 minute
coaching call every week. I had homework that required me to physically clean my
desk, my car, my house, and then to look at the relationships in my life that dont
work.
I wanted to quit the course, over and over. I wanted to stop having the coaching calls,
and stop going to the classrooms. But I ultimately saw the degree to which I was living
without any integrity. I dont mean integrity as in I was a bad person, quite the
contrary, I was in fact a good person. By integrity, I mean I couldnt be counted on to
keep my word. I could always nd an excuse for why things didnt work out, and move
on. I didnt hold myself accountable for results, rather I judged myself on my
intentions.
I realized that I held grudges more than I cared to admit, I refused to simply take
responsibility for results, and I gave up too easily. I realized that I was squishing my
way through life, and people liked me, they appreciated my intelligence and problem
solving ability, but they couldnt count on me when the chips were down to produce.
That insight has been pivotal.

123 Views
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Yuvraj
Wadhwani, runs dressmyphone, curious about various things
That everything we do, every desire we have, that every step of life which we take is
for one goal and one goal only..
We want to feel better than we currently feel.

Kendrick
VanZant, freelance trail guide
Written Jun 8, 2016
I experienced ego death for the rst time and loudly proclaimed The monkey is out
of his cage! and the like while pacing back and forth on a 1-inch rail. I also had really
good balance for some reason.
Martha
Popova-Faida, works at New York City
Written Jun 8, 2016
I realized that life should be enjoyed. Life isnt given to us to struggle all the time.
Everything doesnt have to be dicult.
I believe that it is only when we enjoy life that we can truly be productive creators. I
believe we all have a need to create something in this world, to contribute in some
way.
When youre able to tap into your inner being and truly know yourself, that is when
life will begin to unfold and bloom for you. When you live in balance according to
your inner self, that is when life becomes beautiful.
41 Views
Kiarra
Avenoso, Bible student/teacher and a lover of people of all kinds.
Be your own leader and be the change
I remember when I was in middle school I went to a preforming arts school. It was
lled with many, many intelligent kids but because of hormones changes, peer
pressure, and many, many other variables it's hard for me. I remember being made
fun of and having one best friend. I did have my own group of friends but it was really
no fun.
As I got to high school things changed, the same inuences was still there, but I
changed and became a leader. I acted dierently and was condant within my own
skin. You be amazed about how much your life will altar for you when you be the
change and be your own leader.
62 Views
Jim
Clarke
Written Mon
I listened to the song Cats In The Cradle, by Harry Chapin. You may have heard it. If
not, listen to it. If you are or think you one day might be a parent, its possibly the
most important advice youll ever hear. Even if youre not, and never intend to be, it
contains the most incredibly important insight about not letting life slip by.
Do it now. I just have, and it gives me goosebumpsInternet

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to this day.
38 Views
Anushree
Srivastava, Scientist by profession. Sloth by choice.
"Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future"

- Oscar Wilde
Sunni
Ciulla
Wilbur, MEd Education & Gifted Education, McNeese State
University (2018)
Written Wed
The insight that transformed my life is this not everything that happens is about
me. 99.99% of whats going on in the universe is not about me. That check-out lady
who was so rude and aggravated that I got in her check-out line, was not aggravated
with me. Shes probably been on her feet for 7 hours, she may have just received a call
from the school about her kid being in trouble, who knows but what I do NOW
know is, that its not about me! That lifted a ton of weight o my shoulders. Ive
wasted too many years being oended and hurt over things that had nothing to do
with me. Sad.
31 Views
Stewart
McNorton, studied at Warrington Collegiate
Written Wed
To work in Customer Service. If we all spent some time understanding the needs of
others then we all get some empathy.
Case #1: Jack Bauer is about to save the planet and the Sky signal fails. I call Sky
Customer Service (mad) and they feel as gutted as I am as they love 24 but they're
obviously working so can't watch it. They solve my problem and I feel bad but they go
home with a spring in their step.
Case #2: I'm at the store wanting to buy some cigarettes. The girl behind the counter is
on her phone complaining to her friend that she was recently sent on a "Customer
Service" course and what "a waste of time that was". I didn't waste any more time
before getting my cigarette elsewhere. Bet she didn't have any
I've worked in Customer Service for 30+ years, and every customer I've helped gives
me an extra smile every day.
15 Views
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Kathy
Miller, Self Employed AR
Written Tue
And this too shall pass. And as bad as it may seem , it will pass. It is dicult to
remember this in the throws of it. But, This too shall pass
5 Views
Dylan
Devine, Published author in high school.
Written Jun 8, 2016
For me it was the realization that God is the only person who knows every single bad
thing I've ever done, every bad thought or thing I've said, and still loves me 100% with
no strings attached. I could never be as forgiving as Him.
34 Views
Charles
Gee, Mathematician, Programmer, Computer Scientist with a
PhD in Applied Mathematics
"Even the geniuses ask questions"

61 Views
Beatrice
Hansen
After reading The Metamorphosis by Franz Ka a, I was greatly impressed by the

tragic fate of Gregor Samsa. From that day, I gured out 3 essential things for myself.
1. The main purpose of good literature is not to entertain but teach us. Books
inspiring us for reections are the greatest! They function as irritants that stimulate
us to nd answers for vital issues. Sometimes what all these stories open to us is not
pleasant but all it is made intentionally to attract the attention and touch our hearts.
2. It is wrong to judge people by their appearance. Firstly, one should try to

understand a person prior to reaching any conclusions. Even being an awful big
insect, Gregor remained himself but his family refused to accept that he had changed
only exteriorly. They turned against him instead of helping poor Gregor to overcome
such painful metamorphosis.
3. Bad things happen, it is imminent and no one can inuence it. But we are able to be
more attentive to those who are around. Indierence is almost as destructive as ill
intention.
The novella changed me as a personality and my attitude to people for better. I am

really happy I have read it.
210 Views
Sadiqua
Shadbar, a curious Bachelors in Pharmacy student
it was only one month ago that i had an insight which changed my way of thinking.
Life and time does not wait for anybody then why should we?
if one has to be happy you are the only person who can make yourself feel happy and
no one has the right to make you feel bad.
it is necessary to take control of our own lives and achieve whatever we want to,
because we are what we want to be! Internet
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Anonymous
Written Feb 2, 2013
Life is not perfect. It never will be. You just have to make the very best of it, and you
have to open your heart to what the world can show you; and sometimes it's
terrifying, and sometimes it's incredibly beautiful, and I'll take both. Thanks.
Graham Nash
370 Views
Anonymous
It's not who you are underneath but what you do that denes you.
It was after I heard this that I nally understood how acting is more important than
just thinking. There was a time when I was upset about the fact that no one really see
me for what I was. I am a shy person and nd it very hard to open up to others.
Essentially, I am a very dierent person deep down from what I generally show
myself to be. And I always wondered why no one understood me. It was after I heard
this sentence, I realized that everyone judges everyone else by their actions.
Joel
Postman, Living life and occasionally interacting
"There are somewhere between 7 billion and 8 billion people on this planet and at any
given moment not a single one of them is thinking about you."
Source unknown
59 Views
Phil
Woo, studied Psychology & Sociology at University of Arizona
(2011)
Written Wed
Exactly what you just said. I used to believe the grass was greener on the other side
looking at people like you until I realized it was just an illusion. You look past the
money, cars, houses, vacations, etc. and we are all people no matter what. So I
realized happiness cant come from material stu and possessions, it has to come
from within.
23 Views
Anonymous
Written Aug 20
Yes.
I have one and I live by it.

If you believe something to be true, then sometime in your life you will be called
upon to demonstrate that particular truth...
Choose wisely. Internet

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Several time in my life I was called upon to demonstrate my beliefs.
and that is how I realized you need to make your fundamentals strong. Whatever you
choose to believe be that
Be true to yourself. That is the best thing that you can do to yourself.
77 Views
Seb
Paquet, Living being
The insight that fundamentally we are much more alike than we are dierent.
Jim
Hagerty, Teacher of Right Thinking
We the people need to teach our children wisdom.
Wisdom is self-knowledge and self-understanding.
Wisdom is the power of reason, the ability to balance
justice and mercy

Amit
Avi
Life is dicult, and there are so many lessons in it, we must know how to pick
answers from those lessons. One of the incidents that taught me or gave me a big shift
in my thinking was the time when I was going to attend a big wedding ( I jumped at
the opportunity of attending it as being an event organiser it helps to see and seek
information for my events by attending such big events, I walked in a gigantic set (
Nothing less than Sanjay Leelas bhansalis Devdas Set) , with expensive oral
decoration everywhere, the best of world cuisine, attire that boasted of designer labels
and page 3 environment. What a wedding. right from the invitation box that
comprised of expensive chocolates, perfumes and dry fruits along with a big card
packed in a box, to the venue with a big set, theme entry of bride and groom,
helicopter showers over the couple who were wearing expensive jewellery and attire
that would be about a few lakhs, hundreds of varieties of exotic fruits, delectable
cuisine, mocktail bars etc , food served in silver german plates, and bouncers
standing in every corner in tight t-shirts and bulging physique ( I still dont know why
they are hired in weddings, people dont have drinking and hangover issues in
weddings) , anyway entire grandeur of the wedding was just eye catching and highly
expensive . Everything was big and smelled of money. The baratis were given
expensive shawls and sarees. I stayed in the wedding till late, then at 10.30 slowly the
lights started going o ( the permissible dead line of wedding in outdoor event is
10.30 and post that the lights and music are switched o) , so here the lights started
going o one by one, and so did all the glamour and glitter of the place. In the end
only the camera mans ash light was ashing over the couple , who now looked very
tired and bored. The sta started collecting the waste plates and other litter from the
oor, arranging the chairs on the stack and the caterer was throwing the food in the
waste basket . All the grandeur of the wedding dulled big time in a few minutes, all
the money blown was wasted in uneaten food and Internet
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to please people who attended it
for free, and to witness a money demonstration of a rich man ( materially) . I was
feeling uneasy ( didnt understand why).. I walked out of the venue, and just bang
outside I saw a big ground with shanties, poor people with their shattered and
tattered life and clothes, with children begging for food or money, nobody from the
guests paid a heed to these people as the drived out of the venue in their expensive
cars. Just at my back I saw a huge ostentatious display of wealth and food being
wasted, and outside people not even getting their basic necessities of life. The
disparity of life hurt me deeply inside, the very next day I had to visit an animal
hospital for my stray dog which was being treated for cancer, I went there to witness a
dilapidated structure and a hospital in a very bad and sad state, the animals lived in a
very poor structure and whatever treatment they got was basically coming from a few
donations by animal lovers, the scene here was disheartening.. the state of animals
was saddening, and the sta fed mostly rice to animals as it is cheap and easy to get,
the operations took place in open with modest covering. When asked the sta about
the hospitals condition , I was told Sir, itna donation nahi aata hai yaha , jitna milta
hai wo bhi kam hai . this was the day when there was a huge shift, I took a
decision. no matter what people think, I wont be a people pleaser and use money to
demonstrate my standard of life, no matter how hard you try . you can never please
people. However if you do a kind act with money, or being nice to someone, or just
help someone in need in whichever way you can.. without shouting about it from
rooftops can denitely make you happy. I chose to be happy :)
110 Views
Anonymous
Be choosy in what you start but "Finish What You Start"
Context:
Being a college student, I was surrounded by this wonderful group of people
some talented in sports some in photography, music or something else. Also it felt as
if everyone had a certain goal each more luring. So I had the habit of jumping from
one aim to the other, trying to cultivate one hobby to the next which meant I was
always busy always occupied learning nothing. This insight from dad though seemed
very obvious changed a lot of perspective. Tried to take sometime to think of things I
wanted to do and have tried to follow it from then on. As even if things seem better on
the other side Finishing what you start will give you something rather than chasing
after two and ending with none.
234 Views
Vendicar
Decarian
Written Mon
My life changed when I realized and internalized the fact that reality is immutable
and fantasy is typically self serving and ultimately self defeating.
Nature can not be fooled, and denial always leads to disaster.

26 Views
Amarjeet
Singh, studied at Melba Copland
Written 1am
I have ve aunties. And one them told me that the gifts I never realised I had all
alone, and that it was given by God! She also told me that being a deep thinker is a
rare gift! I almost cried That really changed the way I thought about myself. It seemed
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too good to be true, and it still does! I believe everyone possesses special unique
talents, and being the best you can be is better than trying to be either the next
Kardashian, the next Mad Pat, the next Mark Hamill, the next Margot Robbie, and you
all get the idea! I used to want to be someone else, but let me tell you something, we
are all created the way we are and given the family we have for a reason!
37 Views
Jayendra
Tailor, 10+ years in software but 30+ experience in life,
spirituality and love
Find the reasons to do something. Do not nd the excuses to not to do something.
Doing bring experience and life is all about experiences.

41 Views
John
Stanley, Became freethinker before age 13; met beloved life
partner in 1980.
Written Sep 10
The instant I decided to contact Joan Spezia through Single Book Lovers. I have been
basically a happy person for the 35+ years we have been married; before meeting her I
had come to believe that I would have to make do with much less if I married again
after a failed marriage.
79 Views
Tom
Martino, Consumer Advocate on Radio, TV & Web, daily radio
show (referrallist.com)
Written Mon
Everyone wants the same exact thing. They may seek various means to get it: material
things, relationships, sex, money, career, etc. But is all boils down to this:
RELEVANCE.
12 Views
Vicki
Moore
Written Jan 8, 2013
Recently when I was worried, "Just ignore the human stu."

Anonymous
I met with a high school guidance counselor, and I was trying to blame my family for
how awful my childhood was. The guidance counselor called it 'the blame game',
which is pretty corny, but I really took it to heart. It made me realize that dispensing
blame solves nothing. It made me much more tolerant in my relationships with other
people.
100 Views

Nick
Patsiopoulos
Written Mon
Know thyself.
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Attributed to Socrates or possibly originating in ancient Egypt, it really gets to the
heart of matters. If you truly understand yourself, your motivations, etc., then you
have a template for how to live your life.
21 Views
Sasha
Mrkailo, Searching for the right questions.
Updated Oct 17, 2011
Perhaps when I realized that I don't have to conform to other people's expectations.
Muhammad
Khalifa, I read about life and apply what I read.
It was this day once. A very long and exhausting day. I came home tired as hell and
longing to sleep. With my head on the pillow I thought : had I stayed home that day I
would have never felt the beauty of rest. I had this realization that only hardships give
life meaning. If life was all easy it would have no meaning no purpose. None.
47 Views
Ken
Knickerbocker
Written Jan 7
When I realized were all more wrong than we are right, that if any us made more
correct than incorrect choices, we would be on Wall Street picking stocks for a living.
21 Views
Ranjini
Aravind, studied at Life Lessons
Life ..and everything in it is just an illusion.

And accepting it brings purpose to existence. (So emo, but true!)
Anonymous
Written Wed
At the age of 7, like the kid in What About Bob?it occurred to me that were all gonna
die. I can tell you exactly where I was when that thought hit me. But that means that
the time before us and after us is innitely longer to where it makes no sense that our
lives should be so short. Or as a character in a Woody Allen movie said, Whats the
point?
Then, going to heaven makes no sense either. If we go to heaven, that means that
there is a God and what could possibly be the purpose of putting people on earth and
then shifting them to heaven after what is often a miserable death? Why not just put
them in heaven to start with like he did the angels? And surely infant death doesnt
mean that God needed another angel. Heaven as the outcome for millions makes no
sense.
So I resolved to become alert to an answer to these fundamental questions that most
folks seem to just prefer to dodge. So one day, this modestly dressed guy in a modest
suit comes to my door talking about the Bible and claims that it answers, in a logical
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and satisfying way, the questions that I had. He tells me that only 144,000 go to
heaven for the purpose of ruling over the earth, which makes sense to me. But, I tell
him that there is no way that the number 144,000 is in the Bible. Then he shows it to
me in the Bible (Rev 14:1), and suddenly Im alert and listening cause this guys seems
to know his stu. Over time he answers such questions as , Where are the dead,
What is the purpose of life?, Why do we grow old and die?, and Is there a hope for
us who will eventually die? None of his answers were, Well, God works in
mysterious ways. No, they were logical and believable and reasonable. I wanted to be
a part of this logical group.
And I am. I became one of Jehovahs Witnesses and now do the same as that guy who
initially contacted me, spreading the logical answers to lifes biggest questions. Oddly.
most people dont seem to want to know, or claim that they do know, but without
much logic. So yeah, the single insight that most changed my life was that there are a
people who have reasonable and logical answers to lifes most pressing questions and,
without desire for any monetary gain, go from person to person in an attempt to
spread this information to any who desire the answers, and in accordance with Jesus
command:
Go, therefore, and make disciples of people of all the nations teaching them
Its been a privilege to do so, and the weight of death no longer hovers over me with
such power.
60 Views
Edward
W.Kraus, 78 and still applying "Go not gentle into that good
night"
Life seems to be about Swimming Upstream. Finding out what is around the next
bend in the river and hoping that the around the corners never stops!
38 Views
Utsav
Mishra, Human Being is the best book to read
The following two images summarize everything

1.
2. Internet
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That's it !!
Svetoslav
Neichev
Written Tue
It all starts with this:
The zeitgeist movies,the venus project and the idea of a resource-based economy
really changed my entire perspective on life and our society as a whole.I will not go
into details,but just to mention that this is a documentary that will help you pierce
the veil of disinformation and actually explain how our society works. It will go one
step further and propose a more ecient system than our current one and a genius
one at that. So i implore any of you who seek the truth about their and really
everyones state to take the time and just give it a watch :) Love and gratitude for all of
you.
17 Views
M
Sigurd
Hall, I've certainly lived a life so far
I had a seizure in 2011 just after my birthday. It changed my perspective and made me
realize exactly how fragile life really is. Its a hard thing to explain until you
experience it. A friend has cancer now. She sees what I did and agrees. We have grown
closer because of it.
36 Views
Anonymous
Written Apr 9, 2013
Giving too much importance to any one thing/aspect is harmful! I guess what
changed my life is that voice in my head, the childs voice... I have to make my parents
happy, it is my duty as a daughter. I still am not sure if it changed my life for better or
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worse.
Family is not everything- Dont give importance to the little child's voice that wants to
please everyone..even at home. You are bound to get hurt if thats not truly what you
want.
- a sister who slept with my boyfriend...when she knew very well how serious i was
about him. mentally tortured me for 1 year. yet i do not knw y i still talk with her. i
guess i am still having ash backs of the incidences,...but I do not cry as much as
before. its been 5 years.
- an emotionally blackmailing, angry alcoholic father, who cares more about solving
others problems, than his own family members. i do not know why i crave for his
love..and do things he tells me to do. for instance, i got married,..despite my gut
telling me i shouldnt. Now i feel stuck.
and i am living in a country that is not my home.

136 Views
Kishlay
Raj, app developer , programmmer, innovator , social
entrepreneur
you do dream of IIT but you cant always get it and at last you need to satisfy yourself
with the private colleges similarly u cant always get the hottest girl out there
Troy
Lee
Written Tue
It is a lesson that you can never be successful without making mistakes.
I learned it from a professor who taught Pragmatism course in my university. One day,
it was my turn for presentation, and I was shaking so much that I ended up screwing
the whole class that day, so during the break time I came up to my professor and said
I cannot do it. I am so nervous, and I am ruining all this. And she said No, no, no.
You are doing great. Dont give up until it is over. And she went on to add after my
presentation Even though you might have thought you failed, you can never succeed
unless you go through errors. It really got to me. Ever since then, every time I face a
challenge and fail, I remind myself of what she said about failure, and then I can deal
with the dicult no matter how many time I have to keep challenging it for success.
However, it is not easy to truly understand the signicance of accepting the
possibilities of failure. Nevertheless, once you accept the fact that you can make
mistakes all the time, you will be free of the uncomfortable obsession that you must
make it in every test in life.
20 Views
George
Carlisle
Written Mon
That I know nothing. There are limits to knowledgeI maintain my knowledge but I
do wit ith the understanding that there are always areas that are hidden to me.
I have stopped becoming opinionated Internet

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I have stopped lecturing
I have stopped the judgements
I dont perpetuate my bias automatically

15 Views
Sultana
Begum, writer
Written Nov 7
Well, I have many but the best one was:
What is the point in saying that you love a person when you don't accept/love that
person at their worst
32 Views
Kelly
La
Rue, Veteran, small business owner, Master Electrician
Written Apr 6, 2014
God is stronger than I am. If I surrender to God my life will unfold perfectly.
I used to worry I would somehow defeat God's plan for me. One day as I walked
through a lobby something entered me and I suddenly knew beyond all doubt that
God is stronger than me.
Erica
Asantewaa, 5'8ft high of strength
Written Feb 7, 2014

Richard
Lerner, chief cook and bottlewasher
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Written Wed
At the age of 38 I realized that life was precious and eeting and that I could not
please everyone. I had to do what was best for me and my children.
2 Views
Rob
Evans, former IBM (1982-2013)
Written Tue
I spent a year of my life when my daughter was 4 renovating my home. I worked every
spare moment when not at my day job. I made $50k but to this day still regret losing
that year of my daughters life. My insight was some things once lost are lost forever
and money can not repurchase them. Chose carefully.
15 Views
JR
Anciano, Always learning
That I didn't have to go to college to be successful and/or wealthy.
When I found that out it was like cracking the Da Vinci Code for me
29 Views
Rick
Broida, Owner at Escape Plans LLC (2014-present)
Written Mon
There is no perfect. Once you realize that youre going to have bad days, nothing will
always be just the way you want it, etc., you can stop worrying about things going
wrong and getting upset when they do. Just shrug and say, Oh, well. And move on.
16 Views
Francois
Walter
Well I would have to say my most recent breakup. I was depressed but decided I was
going to be proactive about it. I was diagnosed with bj polar disorder a few years back
and it still felt foreign to me. I started going to my therapist again and she said I
seemed to have borderline personality disorder. I wasn't sure what that was but as
soon as I started doing some research everything started coming together and then I
realized why I have acted the way I have for the past 29 years. Everything is nally
starting to make since and now I'm nally able to start to move on with my life
53 Views
Soumi
Dasgupta, Be positive :)
Written 10h ago
Find new. Find deeper in you.

3 Views
Aditi
Priya, studied at Jawahar Vidya Mandir
You got to stand for something else you will fall for everything..
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Howard
Greenberg
Written 6h ago
George Carlin (see youtube explained how EVERYTHING is bullshit!!! Religion,

politics, advertising etc, all is bullshit.
3 Views
Sung
(Joseph)
Chung
Written Dec 17
Listen to yourself. Listen to that inner voice. Your gut instincts.

16 Views
Anonymous
There is no "Secret Ingredient" !!
Maya
Olivia, Bachelor's in Psychology, First-hand experience
Written Oct 8
He's the one. I don't know how I know but I just know.
You ever just have a really strong feeling?
Also I guess I have to add more than one because I'm feeling extra One summer
(2012) when I was 17 years old I was outside with my friend Eva. It was in the city and
the summer before I started college. It was a very dark time for me but I was still
trying to live. Really really trying. We were just meandering about late-ish at night
and we were in Soho. She passes by this crepe shop and is like oh, I'll see if my friend
is on his shift! She asked me if I wanted to come inside and I shook my head no. That
summer I was really bulimic and I was just not down to meet any new people if that
makes sense. I sat on a green bench outside the crepe shop while she went in (he was
on shift, and she was chatting with him while he made her a crepe). He was really nice
and made the crepe free lo key (you know how corporations are) and he even oered
to make me one when I went in later but I turned that down too. I think he kinda
looked like Drake.
Anyways, I was sitting on the bench. Moping. Because I was getting over this breakup
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with a dude. His name is C. Shithead for this story. So while I was being all sad over C.
Shithead, I was also kinda looking up making eye contact with people. I was stoned
too. Yeah, I just remembered that. And all the people glanced at me but looked away
and kept on walking. But there was this one girl, who was walking just as fast as
everyone else. Keeping up the pace. Blending in. She noticed me. She had dark hair.
So she walked past me at rst. But stopped after like 5 feet, give or take just stopped
dead in her tracks. Turned around and placed a red crane next to me and walked
away. I looked at the crane, thinking why? And I picked up the crane and on the
wings (very carefully written on the edges) she wrote I don't know where he is, but
I'm looking for him. At rst I obviously thought that this meant C. Shithead and I
were gonna get back together. I could only think in short term back then. What was
available to me at that very moment. And that was C. Shithead. Now I'm like alright,
that's cool. But at that moment it meant a lot to me. It shouldn't have because it was
the wrong person.
I treasured that crane and that moment. I don't know why the woman had chose me
and what she saw in me, but it really gave me hope. A lot of fucking hope. I did
eventually throw it out, since I guess I associated it with that dude. But I should've
thought it was for me. For my idea of love in general. That was her purpose. I wish I
kept that crane. But I kept the quote close to my heart, even in the shittiest of times
when I didn't believe. I'm a fucking believer now, and I'm literally eating my own
words as I type this. Love is many things. It is what you make it. You and your lover
(and people you love) give it meaning. And it isn't something you should give up on.
Ever.
49 Views
Chaitali
Das, An undergraduate, dreamer, potterhead.
Written Nov 7
So much of what we learn about love is taught by people who never really loved us.
Saurabh
Kumar, Best is yet to come
Written Apr 4, 2013
Well from my personal experiences...Happiness is the measure of your achievements

whether it may be big one or small ones.
161 Views
Brooks
Wall, works at Wally World
Written Mon
For me it was just in time of joy or trouble.. to think about an old saying things are
never.. as good or as bad as you think they are at the time. Its really great to apply
that - helps people keep a useful even keel in their lives.
24 Views
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Stephen Samuel, If Trump is elected, Written Jan 7 John Graham
Canada will build a wall and charge Updated Jan 26
I live in red
Trump for it. :-)
Written Tue America and no, I I was on a ight
do not think that from China to
Originally, I thought that he was
Trump supporters Vietnam with a guy
conniving, shallow and something of a
realize that they whose job was to
narcissist, willing to court racists in order
are living in a oversee production
to gain the glory of being president. Right
bubble. They do not see their own of furniture for
now, Im considering the possibilit...
snobbishness and self righteousness. Pottery Barn. He was going to Vietnam to
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Chinese factory w...

What Is The Single Insight That Most Changed Your Life? - Quora PDF

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Ask or Search Quora Ask Question Read Answer Notications Ken

Which single work of ction has changed your life the

achieve Inbox Zero.

How do you change the single most important

What question most changed your perception of life

2. To be vulnerable is to expose your darkest, most emotionally-draining

Regarding the second point, which is critical to maintaining healthy relationships, I

29k Views View Upvotes

Upvote 40 Downvote Comments 3+

In 6 years, I went from completely at a loss of what to do for my future after

Independence is the paradigm of I - I can do it; I am responsible; I am self-reliant;

1. I was immature to blame others instead of actually doing something

2. My life is my responsibility. Past being an infant, child, then young adult,

3. Being negative was exhausting! Its much easier having an optimistic

Negative Return on Investment (ROI) = Not a good strategy/mindset = Stop being

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Upvote 170 Downvote Comments 1+

But in reality, it looks like this:

As for the maintenance project I referred to earlier, it was a fairly complicated

Upvote 140 Downvote Comments 2+

Upvote 373 Downvote Comments 8+

Photo credit: Austin Neill, Unsplash

Upvote 43 Downvote Comments 3

Time to get to work!

Want to learn more about the Success Mindset?

Upvote 120 Downvote Comment

Just think about that.

You have to want success as bad as you want to breathe.

His quote changed my life forever. Hopefully it changes yours too.

Peace and Love,

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Photo Copyright: Rice Consulting

Upvote 340 Downvote Comments 7+

Compounding is the most powerful force in life

Upvote 107 Downvote Comments 2

Realizing the hard way that

it pays in immeasurable ways to be always be kind to strangers.

Upvote 41 Downvote Comment 1

Form is emptiness, and emptiness is form.

As an implication of that, all things are one.

I gained this understanding emotionally through meditation, and logically through

1. There is no death, and no birth; only transformation. In a way, I am the re-

Upvote 51 Downvote Comments 8

It's my life. I'm in charge of it.

Upvote 132 Downvote Comments 4+

Know what these all have in common? They're excuses.

After 31 years of living, I nally realized this:

This is your life. Take control and be the CEO of it.

When you nally take responsibility for your life:

You learn to stop blaming others

You accept your mistakes and learn from them

You start taking action instead of moping around

You realize how important it is to be the best version of yourself

You grow as a person

Stop complaining. Be awesome instead.

For more motivation subscribe to my site CEO Lifestyle.

Upvote 648 Downvote Comments 6

Everyone wanted to be me.

Is this all there is?

Is this all there is?

I did. Climbing that ladder was at times terrifying,Internet