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When you use small talk constructively alongside consciously-managed body language, you can make everyday life
easier and more success-oriented.
When we make a new acquaintance, we activate a structure of interests and communication.
Small talk also gives us space to see the potential in a conversation, and at the same time gives us the opportunity
either to accept or to decline a relationship.
The anatomy of conversation has three stages of communication, with small talk as the first stage.
At the small-talk stage you aim to create a good atmosphere for the person you want to make contact with. It is all
about being precise in your communication through your body language and your voice, and leading the potential
conversational partner to want to progress to the next stage.
If you reach the second stage, you are probably talking in professional terms or talking about a common reference
topic. Most people feel comfortable in this domain. You have found something in common, and you are committed
to a real conversation with substance.
The highest stage is intense and personal conversation. Here we talk to each other as good colleagues, friends, and
close family.
You should also keep in mind, that it is important for you to be able to take the initiative to generate small talk and
get a conversation going. But once talking is under way, it is even more important that you are able to keep silent
and listen. The best way to get your conversational partner to relax is to listen to him. People will often be very
happy and feel honored to have you demonstrate real interest in them.
Building Rapport
Establishing Bonds
Rapport is the ability to enter someone else's world, to make him feel that you understand him, that you have a
strong common bond. Motivational speaker Tony Robbins.
Have you ever known someone who has a knack for connecting with people? No matter who this person meets, he
or she manages to create a sense of trust and understanding within a matter of minutes.
We can intuitively believe that this is a natural gift either you can build rapport like this, or you can't. However,
this isn't correct: developing rapport is a skill that anyone can learn, and then use.
And it doesn't matter what industry you're in or what position you hold knowing how to build rapport can bring
you countless opportunities. After all, when you have rapport with someone, that person wants to help you succeed!
So what is rapport? And how you can learn the skills needed to build it? We'll examine all of this, and more, in this
article.
About Rapport
The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines rapport as "relation characterized by harmony, conformity, accord, or
affinity."
Put simply, you have rapport with someone when there is mutual liking and trust. Once you've established rapport
with a person, he or she is far more likely to be open with you and share information, buy your product, recommend
you to others, or support your ideas. And when someone has established rapport with you, you're likely to do the
same.
Why Build Rapport?
Building rapport is a skill that you can use anywhere.
For instance, you can use rapport to:
Create a positive connection with new or existing team members.
Build good relationships with clients or suppliers.
Break the ice with new colleagues or with your boss when you start a new job.
Get support for your ideas and proposals.
In short, establishing rapport with people can open doors, create opportunities, and lead to excellent relationships.
Tip:
Rapport is similar to trust, and you can often build trust and rapport simultaneously. However, building rapport
focuses more on establishing a bond or connection.
Building Honest Rapport
Clearly, you can build rapport honestly, or you can use it cynically.
Good team working, for example, depends on good relationships. Honest rapport-building is great for developing
these, and it benefits everyone.
However, if you're building rapport to sell someone something that they wouldn't otherwise want, or that will do
them harm, then this is cynical and manipulative. Watch out for this type of rapport-building you may encounter it
often!
How to Build Rapport
We'll now look at strategies and techniques that you can use to build rapport with others.
1. Find Common Ground
Think of how comfortable you might feel if, while living thousands of miles from where you grew up, you met
someone from your hometown. That sense of connectedness creates an instant rapport between two people!
When you meet someone new, do your best to find something you have in common. Use open-ended questions to
discover some personal information about the person: perhaps you attended the same school or university, have the
same favorite vacation spot, grew up in the same city, know the same people, or root for the same sports team.
Remember, any common ground can help establish rapport it can even help to have an interest in someone's life or
hobbies, or to share similar beliefs and values.
Tip:
It's important to be sincere here; don't make up an interest in something just to create rapport. Not only can this seem
desperate; it can dent your credibility!
2. Focus on Your Appearance
How you dress is a key component of making a great first impression and establishing rapport with someone.
Your appearance should help you connect with people; not create a barrier.
For instance, imagine you're a sales rep calling on a plant supervisor. You're dressed in a well-tailored, expensive
suit. Meanwhile, the supervisor has been working out on the floor all day; he's dressed in jeans, a worn flannel shirt,
and work boots. The difference in your appearance is likely to make him feel uncomfortable and perhaps even
slightly resentful.
A good rule of thumb is to dress just a little bit "better" than the people you're about to meet. Whenever possible,
find out about this in advance. If you arrive and see that you're overdressed, you can quickly "dress down" by taking
off your jacket or tie and by rolling up your shirtsleeves.
3. Be Empathic
Empathy is about understanding other people by seeing things from their perspective, and recognizing their
emotions. Once you achieve this, it's easier to get "on their level."
To be more empathic , develop your emotional intelligence so that you can understand others better. You can also
use Perceptual Positions a technique for seeing things from other people's perspectives.
4. Use Mirroring
Mirroring is when you adjust your own body language and spoken language so that you "reflect" that of the person
you're talking to.
For example, law enforcement professionals apply the mirroring technique when interviewing witnesses, especially
those who have been through a traumatic experience. They might mirror the victim's body language, and adjust the
volume and tone of their voice to match the victim's.
To use mirroring:
Carefully watch the person's body language , including gestures and posture. If the person is sitting down with both
hands folded, then copy the person's posture. As the person grows more comfortable with you, he or she may relax
and sit back: mirror this change in posture as well.
Mirror the other person's language. If he or she uses simple, direct words, then you should too. If the person speaks
in technical language, then match that style if appropriate. When you respond, you can also reiterate key words or
phrases that he or she used.
Copy the other person's speech patterns, such as vocal tone and volume. For instance, if he or she speaks softly and
slowly, then lower the volume and tempo of your voice. (Research by the U.S. Federal Bureau of Investigation
(FBI) suggests this is the most effective way to establish rapport. It's very subtle, but it makes the other person feel
comfortable and, most importantly, it makes them feel that they're being understood.)
Tip 1:
While mirroring is useful in building rapport, don't match every word and gesture. Also, do this on a subtle level
being too overt can be counterproductive.
Tip 2:
Clearly, mirroring can be a very difficult skill to master. Consider using role playing to practice it.
5. Don't Forget About the Basics
In developing rapport with others, you should also use the tried-and-true basics of good communication :
Shaking hands firmly (in cultures where this is acceptable).
Looking people in the eye.
Smiling.
Holding your head up and maintaining good posture.
Asking open-ended questions.
Being sincere.
Facing the other person instead of looking at your computer screen or mobile device.
These basic tenets form the foundation of great communication, and it's hard to establish good rapport without them.
Tip 1:
Although there will be times when you will need to build rapport with someone quickly, it's best done as part of a
longer-term relationship.
Tip 2:
It's important to use your best judgment when applying these techniques as we've already mentioned, using these
techniques incorrectly or dishonestly can actually stop you building rapport with people.
Re-establishing Rapport
Once rapport has been lost, rebuilding it takes time.
First, confront why you lost the rapport in the first place. Be humble and explain honestly and simply what
happened. If you need to apologize, do so.
Next, focus on ways of repairing any broken trust . Make an extra effort to put in extra work if you need to, and
keep your word. Transparency and showing a genuine concern for the other person's needs will go a long way in
rebuilding trust and reestablishing rapport.
Key Points
You build rapport when you develop mutual trust, friendship, and affinity with someone.
Building rapport can be incredibly beneficial to your career it opens doors and helps establish good relationships
with clients, colleagues, and team members.
To build rapport, use the following strategies.
Find common ground.
Focus on your appearance.
Be empathic.
Mirror the other person.
Don't forget about the basics.
Building rapport is best done in the long-term. But you can use these strategies to build it quickly, if you need to.
What is the public relations?
Public relations (PR) is the way organisations, companies and individuals communicate with the public and media.
A PR specialist communicates with the target audience directly or indirectly through media with an aim to create
and maintain a positive image and create a strong relationship with the audience.
Gossip Chain: In the gossip chain, one person seeks and tells the information to everyone. This chain is just like the
wheel where one person stays at the centre and the information passes along the spokes of the wheel to others
stationed on the rim. In the following figure, A is at the center and passes the information to others staying on the
rim of the wheel.
Probability Chain: The probability chain is a random process in which someone transmits the information to others
in accordance with the laws of probability and then these others tell still others in a similar way. This chain may also
be called random process. The probability chain is shown below-
Cluster Chain: In the cluster chain, a person tells the information to the selected persons who may in turn relay
(pass) the information to other selected persons. Most of the information communication follows this chain. Cluster
The ability to communicate in a professional manner is crucial in taking you a long way into your career and even
more crucial for having a well balanced personal life.
If you are wondering what social communication is, you have come to the right place. According to the The
American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (ASHA), social communication is "the synergistic emergence of
social interaction, social cognition, pragmatics (verbal and nonverbal), and receptive and expressive language
processing." In other (less complicated) words, Social communication refers to language that is used in social
situations. Easy right? Well, not exactly. Communication is a skill that everyone knows but not everyone has
mastered...especially when it comes to communication in the workplace. If you want to learn more about the
components of social communication click this link.
Before I get into the nitty gritty details, lets set the foundations. Now that you know the definition of social
communication, here is the definition of workplace communication. Workplace= a physical space that is tangible
and actually holds relationships, thoughts and goals. Communication= the activity of transmitting thoughts. This
type of communication involves listening, speaking, observing and the ability to comprehend meaning through the
verbal and nonverbal communication process. In summary, effective communication needs to have active
communication between everyone.
Great! You are now caught up on all of the definitions. Now, onto categories. From talking to your CEO, to texting a
co-worker LOL, here are the types of Communication happening at any given workplace:
1. Informal communication: According to this Linkedin Slideshow, informal communication is defined by
episodes of interaction that do not reflect officially designated channels of communication. Translation: Exchanging
information through unofficail channels. Example: Meeting a co-worker at the water cooler and discussing weekend
plans.
2. Formal Communication: Communication through officially designated channels of message flow between
organization positions. Translation: Exchanging information through official channels. Example: Reading a policy
manual or communicating through traditional hierarchical structures.
If you want to get even more detailed (and I know you do) here is a breakdown of 3 different types of formal
communication from SlideShare:
1. Vertical Communication
Upward:
Transmission of messages from lower to higher levels (commonly initiated by subordinates with their superiors).
Types of messages: performance on the job, job related problems, fellow employees and their problems,
subordinates perceptions of organization policies and practices, tasks and procedures.
Downward:
Flows from upper to lower (such as manager to employer or superior to subordinates).
Types of messages: job instructions, procedures and practices information and feedbacks.
2. Diagonal
Communication that cuts across both work areas (functions) and organizational levels.
3. Horizontal Communication
Flow of messages across functional areas at a given level of an organization (this permits people at same level to
communicate directly).
The flow of information between colleagues and peers
All this being said, it is clear that communication is an effective management tool. The importance of
communication in the workplace is often overlooked. Effective communication is a skill that everyone can develop.
Developing these skills will benefit you both inside and outside of work. If you need a little more help, here are 5
great ways to amp up those skills.
1. Pay Attention. In the words of the great Jennifer Hudson LISTENNNNNN. Dont interrupt and dont just
pretend to be paying attention. It's impossible to have effective communication if we don't give them our undivided
attention. Listening and paying attention involve analysis of body language. So pick up on little cues and be aware
of how people are conveying their thoughts not just through words.
2. Check your grammar. This one applies to written communication. Proofread everything. Nothing makes you
look as unprofessional as a bad typo.
3. Give Constructive Criticism. In any management position (and even noon-managerial positions at that) you
have to leave emotions at bay. Dont project negative emotions from one project or person onto another. This only
creates tension and bad results. When giving feedback, work to ensure your comments aren't biased or emotionally
charged.
By mastering workplace social communication strategies, you can ensure that you will become an important asset to
your company.
Social networking
Social networking is the practice of expanding the number of one's business and/or social contacts by making
connections through individuals, often through social media sites such as Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and Google+.
Based on the six degrees of separation concept (the idea that any two people on the planet could make contact
through a chain of no more than five intermediaries), social networking establishes interconnected online
communities (sometimes known as social graphs) that help people make contacts that would be good for them to
know, but that they would be unlikely to have met otherwise.
Depending on the social media platform, members may be able to contact any other member. In other cases,
members can contact anyone they have a connection to, and subsequently anyone that contact has a connection to,
and so on. Some services require members to have a preexisting connection to contact other members.
While social networking has gone on almost as long as societies themselves have existed, the unparalleled potential
of the Web to facilitate such connections has led to an exponential and ongoing expansion of that phenomenon. In
addition to social media platforms, the capacity for social interaction and collaboration is increasingly built into
business applications.
The Pros of Social Networking
1. Staying Connected
The main purpose of social media is to be able to stay connected to friends and families in todays fast paced and
ever changing worlds. You are able to rekindle old friendships, share family photos, and special events in your life
with just about everyone you know, at the same time.
2. Finding People With Common Interests
Social networking is also a great way to meet entirely new people. You can seek out groups that are focused towards
your special interests and hobbies and connect with local people that share the same interests. Online and social
media dating is almost more common than traditional dating is in todays world.
3. Invaluable Promotional Tool
Companies, artists, and musicians can reach an impossibly large and diverse amount of people using social media
sites. This allows them to promote and market themselves and their products in a way that has never been seen
before.
4. Information Spreads Incredibly Fast
Breaking news and other important information can spread like wildfire on social media sites. Important things like
recalls, storm information, or missing children are all communicated and taken seriously very quickly.
5. Helps To Catch And Convict Criminals
People often do not think of the consequences of what they post of these social sites. Pictures of themselves doing
illegal things, or even bragging posts about crimes they have committed are all things that law enforcement use to
persecute these criminals. They also use these sites to identify and solve existing cases.
Power dressing
Meaning
A stylish and expensive clothing style, intended to convey the impression of assertiveness and competence and
predominantly worn by women..
Origin
This term has been used since the late 1970s and reflected the clothing styles favoured in business and politics in the
US and UK throughout the 1980s. The style was heavily influenced by influential women who were in the news at
the time, for example, the cast of the television shows Dynasty and Dallas, the UK Prime Minister Margaret
Thatcher and the Princess of Wales. Men also had form of 'power dressing' too but this was less distinctive and
innovative and often manifested itself in little more than an unusually expensive business suit.
The term 'power dressing' is first recorded in the New York paper The Post-Standard, September 1979:
"The accent has shifted to glamour and power dressing for the city rather than the casual look of past seasons."
The style itself leaned towards a somewhat masculine shape and frequently included a tailored jacket, almost always
complete with shoulder pads. The clothes were often made from silk or other expensive materials and their high cost
emphasized the elite status of the women wearing them.
Why is it important to dress well at work
It is often said, Dont judge a book by its cover. On the flip side, if the cover is fantastic, the book is likely to not
only get desired attention but also appreciation it may deserve. Quite evidently, our appearance has a huge role to
play in the impressions we leave on people and the way we are perceived in everyday life professionally and
personally. So if clothes make such an impact, then why must something keep you from nailing it!
Observing people and seeing how they are different has always intrigued me. Ones appearance invariably becomes
the window through which the world looks at them. Interestingly, it may occasionally also become the deciding
factor for prospects at work. Aside, some of us definitely invest in perfection, including perfection in how we pull
ourselves together every morning. The idea is that if appearance has such a huge role to play in so many areas of
ones life, including boosting self-confidence, then why should it be so difficult to do?
When I talk about the importance of dressing well, I am not referring to the professional context only. It is
something that extends to all areas of your life since your clothes are a large part of who you are as a person. It not
only makes you feel good but can also largely influence your interaction/equation with people.
Here are few more compelling reasons that will help rest my case!
It lets you focus on important stuff
When you are dressed in well-fitted comfortable clothes that are truly meant for you, youre undistracted. This also
means that it keeps you focussed on getting the important stuff done.
It helps you break stereotypes
Its been proven by research that a whopping 65 per cent of working women feel that their subordinates do not take
them seriously in a corporate set up. Although power dressing may not change this scenario overnight, it is definitely
a small but sincere start!
You feel the way you dress
Your clothes not only add to your presentation, but also contribute to your behaviour therefore defining your body
language. When you look confident and approachable, you become more confident and approachable. Various
studies including one by Joy V. Peluchette and Katherine Karl on The impact of workplace attire on employee self-
perceptions show that Respondents felt most authoritative, trustworthy, and competent when wearing formal
business attire.
You never know who you may run into
On a lighter note, imagine yourself dressed shabbily at work only to run into an ex-flame or a freshly recruited
Greek god. It may not only ruin your chances of getting noticed but may also put a permanent end to things before
they start. Now who couldve thought being underdressed could cost one so much?
Finally, first impressions matter!
Visual associations subconsciously go a long way and we have very little control over it. When you dress well, you
are simply using this subliminal power of association to your advantage. In this fast-paced world, youre given
precious little seconds to make an impression. Thirty seconds to be precise, if various studies are to be believed.
When you meet someone for the first time, the impression they carry of you lasts a while, so why not leave a mark?
Having listed so many logical reasons to dress well, the one factor that personally overrides all others is that
priceless high you get out of just looking good. So ladies, pepper up your style a bit and get that magic going
already!
Brooke:
I'm happy to provide the information you requested.
For informal messages, you may also insert the greeting on the same line as the opening sentence, like this:
Hello, David. I hope you had a great vacation.
Good morning, Wanda. I am following up on this morning's meeting.
Or just use the person's name in the opening sentence, like this:
Yiota, you were right about the prices.