Molly Martin

Nov. 29th 2016

PVC Intern

Emotionally Healthy Leader Reflection

Emotional health is one of those topics we like to sweep under

the rug. Its deemed as less important than physical health but often

times when we are emotionally unhealthy it affects our physical health

too. Ive found that society doesnt think fondly of openly discussing

weaknesses and creating vulnerability in what were learning.

However, I firmly believe that in order to effectively and to the highest

of your ability lead others, you must first lead yourself. Creating self-

awareness in your own life will overflow into your work and

relationships.

Through the process of trying to become more self-aware of my

emotions, thoughts, actions, and beliefs, Ive found that in my own life,

and I know Im not alone in this, I struggle to differentiate the

difference between working for God and being with God. This book has

awakened me to that. In Chapter 1, author, Peter Scazzeron says, I

feel like Im so swamped building the church and creating

environments for others to meet God I wonder if I lost Jesus

somewhere along the way. The theme of this semester for me

personally has been learning how large of a dependence I have on

myself. I should do this.. What will I say in this situation How can I

help this person have been consistent thoughts Ive had. After

identifying this self-dependence Ive had to consciously make the effort

to change my mindset to dependence on God and thoughts in line with

God can do this.. What does God want to say to this situation

How does God want to use me to help this person-*if He is indeed

calling me to play that role. This has truly been a good book to read to

start introducing me and our staff to what God is calling from us as

individuals and how he wants to direct our church. We are apart of

something so much bigger than a workplace, stats, goals, and a church

business. We are followers of Christ and His body, inevitably failing but

non the less, continually trying to love, serve and act more like Christ.

Chapter one was a good introduction to what is yet to be learned in

this book.

Chapter two introduces us to facing our shadow. It is a call to

reflecting on your weaknesses and where you may be faulty as a

leader. Acknowledging this can help you to break those barriers and

reform your weaknesses. Without bringing light to said things, theres

no room for growth. But most of all, you will undoubtedly be an

adequate leader at best if you are not leading yourself. While I wish

this chapter had gone more in depth with counteracting your shadow, I

think it was also one of the most beneficial chapters for me. It created

room to think and reflect about your experience in leadership positions

and how your early life/family has impacted that. I have recently

become a more reflective and critical thinker but often times the

process stops there. I want to understand and really know myself and

the workings of my inner and unconscious being but its hard to get

past this wall that blocks me. I think facing your shadows is an

excellent start to identifying what that wall is but the difficult thing I

now face is where to do from here. While this chapter was intriguing

and helpful, I felt feeling like I wanted more from it.

Leading out of your marriage/singleness was another really

beneficial chapter. I took away a lot of interesting points that Scazzero

made about leading out of marriage. It was very insightful to hear what

marriage means to him and how he makes that a priority in order to be

a better pastor, father, follower and friend. Like I said earlier, I think it

would be really easy and natural for someone to put his or her all into

their work, especially in ministry because its justified as Gods work.

But recognizing that God provided this other person in your life to help

you fully experience Him and show others the depth of His love is a

beautiful thing. I loved this new perspective and understanding I

gained. The singleness passage was definitely beneficial to read as

well. While we can never be perfect in anything and theres always

room fro improvement, leading out of my singleness is one of the few

things I do fairly well. It was however, so cool to hear about the

purpose of singleness. When the author talked about how we are

witnesses to the sufficiency and fullness of Jesus and we are married to

Christ is an awesome message that so many Christian singles could

benefit from hearing because most times I think people see singleness

as the time they have to wait around for their person to come into

picture. Singleness isnt a time we should use to simply wait for

another person to complete us but a time we should spend truly

getting to know our God and our identity in Him. We will benefit from

this the most because this is the time when we can recognize that

Christ really is sufficient to meet our needs.

Before reading Chapter 5 about the Sabbath it had been

something I had recently been curious about. I sought guidance from

Erik and Daniel about what the Sabbath means and how they construct

their day. After reading the Sabbath chapter in EHL I discovered not

only that Sabbath is important but also why it is. I learned how the

Sabbath creates a rhythm and without that we are out of sync. It is a

dance that is in the nature of our fabric and essential to a sustainable

life. After this chapter I left feeling reassured that Im not the only

person who is working and left feeling drained and convicted that it is

something I need to make a routine in my life if I want to be capable to

really truly rely on the strength God gives be as well as sacrifice my

time to Him. I already knew that my Sabbath day would not include

school or intern work but some other main things I took away from the

book that I wanted to include in my rest time were being intentional in

everything I do and delight in Gods creation and things that help me

experience Him and bring me joy.