My Ah ha!

Moments

The question what do you want to be when you grow up? has been a journey for me.

The question first popped up in elementary school, and as a young child, I dreamt of becoming

everything! In elementary school, I dreamed of becoming a dentist because I liked the tiny toys

and the shiny scratch-and-sniff stickers they gave out to kids after each appointment. In middle

school, I wanted to work in the psychological field. Middle school felt especially rough for me,

but I found hope in the future when I discovered psychology. I became fascinated with how the

mind works, how mental illnesses manifest, and how psychology helps those who suffer from

mental illness. I felt a connection, so I dreamt of becoming a psychologist or psychiatrist. It

wasnt until my first two years of high school that I thought about becoming a teacher. My love

of learning and the feeling of self-worth and achievement that many of my teachers gave me has

been so influential in my decision to pursue teaching as a career.

Mrs. Free, my teacher for Virginia Teachers for Tomorrow, often mentions having an

Ah ha! moment, which is where a student experiences a significant moment that confirms their

love of teaching. My moment came in December of 2016the time I taught my first full group

lesson. I felt so scared and nervous. My lesson plan came out perfect, but I didnt know how to

open my lesson to my students without sounding boring or clich. In order to soothe my worries,

the day before I taught my lesson about decimal placement I ran around the school asking my

teachers about their first time teaching. I went to a total of eight teachers, and each of them

agreed that their first time was terrifying! Even so, those teachers told me they felt so

accomplished afterwards, which made me more confident in myself and my abilities as a

blossoming teacher. I absolutely loved the care and support my teachers gave me, and I realized
on the way home that I wanted to become someone like that for a student: a caring mentor that

thrives off their students success and well-being.

In addition to my teachers, the students in my internships have continued to influence my

aspirations to becoming a teacher. Whenever I work with a student individually or in a group, I

cant help but feel a sense of fulfillment when they finally understand the material. One of my

favorite moments of internship was after my first full group lesson. I sat down at the lunch table

with a few students of mine, and I asked them how they felt about my lesson. They bombarded

me with compliments like You make it easier to understand than Mrs. Wren (my cooperating

teacher)! That short conversation between my students and I validated me.

Notably, I believe Ive seen the worst and the best that students can give. My 5th graders

are all amazing students, and I love them very much; however, I cannot deny that 90% of them

test my last nerve. I can admit there have been moments where I was completely lost or

frustrated when a student refused to follow instructions. For example, bullying has been a huge

problem. The bullying issue exploded with the formation of a bullying gang that was quickly

disbanded. I had noticed a good handful of students targeting Meg and Gavin, both students have

some form of special needs. From what Ive observed, the ring leaders were only punished, but

not fully explained to why their actions were wrong. Once the In-school Suspension (ISS) ended,

I didnt see any preemptive regulations put in place to teach the kids about acceptance and

empathy. I want to become a teacher because I want to teach the next generation to love one

another and understand each others different opinions. I want to foster a safe and loving

classroom environment, so my students can look back and think, Im a better person thanks to

Miss Z. or Im so glad I had Miss Z as a teacher because now I know this and that! I strongly
believe that school can become a place where students can learn so much about life beyond

academics. I want to make at least one part of a students life enjoyable before they embark on a

new chapter in their lives.

All things considered, speaking honestly, I hesitated to apply to part two of VTFT or the

Future Teacher Award because of how I felt when I compared myself to some of peers. Many of

them act bubbly and knew from the get-go that they want to become teachers. In internship, they

dove in head first and made connections with their students in the blink of an eye. I felt unsure if

teaching was right for me. During my first internship, I basically observed for two months, and I

didnt know how to fully put myself out there to get a meaningful experience. I had a dilemma

that wasnt fully fixed until my VTFT II internship, which pushed me to figure out my issues,

and here I am today, writing about why I aspire to become a teacher!

I want to become a teacher because I want to prove to myself and others that someone

who is relatively soft spoken and timid can become an amazing teacher. I want to prove that you

dont have to know right away, that its okay to have doubts about the future, and that time and

experience definitely helps anyone reach their goals. I want to teach my students that its okay to

be confused about the future because I felt the same way. I want to become a teacher because I

want to shape the minds of the next generation. I want to be the person that evokes critical

thinking and pushes my students towards empathy and knowledge. I jumped from career to

career until I found what I believe is the perfect one for meteaching!