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A Joke-A-Day

For The Classroom


By Brandi Jordan, Managing Editor Of The Teachers Lounge, A Really Good Stuff Blog
A Joke-A-Day:
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom
Happy, smiling children make for eager, engaged learners. With the myriad of
testing and assessments that take place throughout the school year, it is nice to
have a moment each day to make kids smile. Whether you start the morning off
with a joke or fit it in between math and reading lessons, a kid-friendly joke, tongue
twister, or riddle helps lighten the mood and gets your students thinking outside
the box.

Jokes and riddles offer a great segue into multiple word meanings, homophones,
language manipulation, alliteration, and more. Need a new way to grab your ESL/
ELL students attention? Try telling them a joke. Want to challenge your students to
use language in different ways? Ask them to write jokes and riddles. The inherent
fun factor of jokes makes them an easy sell and much less intimidating than
asking students to write a paragraph.

If you think writing a joke is easy, think again. It requires students to


not only understand the way words are put together, but encourages
them to expand their vocabulary. With a strong emphasis in the
Common Core State Standards on vocabulary, writing and telling
jokes is the perfect, kid-friendly way to meet those standards.

The 200 kid-friendly jokes in this book are great for classroom (or
home) use. Encourage students to create a joke a day for your
classroom and create a book that they can take home at the end
of the year. Inspiration, humor, and kid-friendly fun are a sure-fire
recipe for student success.

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A Joke-A-Day 1
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 1 Day 8
Q: What do you get when you throw a Q: Why did the chicken go to jail?
lot of books into the ocean? A: Because he was using fowl language.
A: A title wave.
Day 9
Day 2 Q: What has two legs but cant walk?
Q: What has four wheels and flies? A: A pair of pants.
A: A trash truck.
Day 10
Day 3 Q: Why was the math book always
Q: Why couldnt the bicycle stand up? worried?
A: Because it was two tired. A: Because it had so many problems.

Day 4 Day 11
Q: What do you call a boomerang that Q: Which school supply is king of the
doesnt come back? classroom?
A: A stick. A: The ruler.

Day 5 Day 12
Q: Why did the man take his clock to Q: Which vegetable should you never
the vet? invite on a boat trip?
A: Because it had ticks. A: A leek.

Day 13
Q: How did Benjamin Franklin feel
when he discovered electricity?
A: He was shocked.

Day 14
Q: Why did the horse chew with his
mouth open?
A: Because he had bad stable manners.
Day 6
Q: What did the mouse say to the Day 15
other mouse when he tried to steal his Q: Whats a tornados favorite game to
cheese? play?
A: Thats nacho cheese. A: Twister.

Day 7 Day 16
Q: Which is faster, heat or cold? Q: What do you give a sick lemon?
A: Heat, because you can catch a cold. A: Lemon-aid.

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A Joke-A-Day 2
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 17 Day 26
Q: Why couldnt the pirate play cards? Q: Why did the pony get detention?
A: Because he was always on the deck. A: Because he was horsing around.

Day 18 Day 27
Q: Where do polar bears vote? Q: What lights up a stadium?
A: At the North Pole. A: A soccer match.

Day 19
Q: Whats a ghosts favorite fruit?
A: Boo-berries.

Day 20
Q: Why did the robber take a shower?
A: Because he wanted to make a clean getaway.

Day 21
Q: What did the mayonnaise say when
the refrigerator was opened?
A: Close the door! Im dressing! Day 28
Q: Whats bigger than an elephant, but
Day 22 doesnt weigh anything?
Q: What do you call a shoe made from A: His shadow.
a banana?
A: A slipper. Day 29
Q: Why did the teacher have to wear
Day 23 sunglasses?
Q: What did the apple tree say to the A: Because her students were so bright.
farmer?
A: Stop picking on me! Day 30
Q: Which bus crossed the ocean?
Day 24 A: Columbus.
Q: Why are there fences around
cemeteries? Day 31
A: Because people are dying to get in. Q: What do you call a pig that does
karate?
Day 25 A: A pork chop.
Q: Where do cows go on the weekend?
A: To the moo-vies. Day 32
Q: Why was six afraid of seven?
A: Because seven eight nine.

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A Joke-A-Day 3
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 33 Day 42
Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? Q: How do monsters tell their
A: A fsh. fortunes?
A: They read their horror-scopes.
Day 34
Q: What do gymnasts, acrobats, and Day 43
bananas all have in common? Q: Where does the witch park her
A: They can all do splits. vehicle?
A: In the broom closet.
Day 35
Q: Whats a frogs favorite game? Day 44
A: Hopscotch. Q: What is a witchs favorite subject in
school?
Day 36 A: Spelling.
Q: What dies but never lives?
A: A battery. Day 45
Q: Why couldnt the ghost see his
Day 37 parents?
Q: What day of the week does the A: Because they were trans-parents.
potato look forward to the least?
A: Fry-day. Day 46
Q: What do you do if youre a fan of
Day 38 Draculas?
Q: What do you call a seagull that flies A: You join his fang club.
over the bay?
A: A bagel. Day 47
Q: Where do ghosts go for a
Day 39 swim?
Q: What is Draculas A: The Dead Sea.
favorite fruit?
A: Neck-tarines. Day 48
Q: Whom did the monster
Day 40 ask to kiss his boo-boos
Q: What does a skeleton after he fell?
order for dinner? A: His mummy.
A: Spare ribs.
Day 49
Day 41 Q: What makes a skeleton
Q: Whats a ghosts laugh?
favorite dessert? A: When something tickles his
A: Ice Scream. funny bone.

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A Joke-A-Day 4
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 50 Day 59
Q: What would you get if you crossed a Q: Which monster is the best dance
teacher with a vampire? partner?
A: Lots of blood tests. A: The Boogie Man.

Day 51 Day 60
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the Q: What did the turkey stay before it
road? was roasted?
A: To get to the body shop. A: Im stuffed!

Day 52 Day 61
Q: What do witches order at hotels? Q: Why was the turkey arrested?
A: Broom service. A: It was suspected of fowl play.

Day 53 Day 62
Q: Why did the Cyclops stop teaching? Q: What smells the best at
A: Because he only had one pupil. Thanksgiving?
A: Your nose.
Day 54
Q: Why didnt Dracula have any Day 63
friends? Q: What kind of weather does a turkey
A: Because he was a pain in the neck. like?
A: Fowl weather.
Day 55
Q: Where did the witch have to go Day 64
when she misbehaved? Q: What always comes at the end of
A: To her broom. Thanksgiving?
A: The letter g.
Day 56
Q: What do you get if you cross a
vampire and a snowman?
A: Frostbite.

Day 57
Q: Whats a ghosts favorite room in
the house?
A: The living room.

Day 58
Q: What do birds do on Halloween?
A: They go trick or tweeting.

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A Joke-A-Day 5
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 71
Q: What type of diet did the snowman
go on?
A: The Meltdown Diet.

Day 72
Q: What did the snowman have for
breakfast?
A: Frosted Flakes.

Day 73
Q: What do you have in December that
Day 65 you dont have in any other month?
Q: Why couldnt the turkey eat A: The letter d.
dessert?
A: Because he was stuffed. Day 74
Q: What often falls in winter, but
Day 66 never gets hurt?
Q: What type of key is the most A: Snow.
important at Thanksgiving dinner?
A: The tur-key. Day 75
Q: Why did the boy keep his trumpet in
Day 67 the freezer?
Q: Which side of the turkey has the A: Because he liked cool music.
most feathers?
A: The outside. Day 76
Q: Whats brown and sneaks around
Day 68 the kitchen?
Q: Are turkey leftovers good for your A: Mince spies.
health?
A: Not if youre the turkey! Day 77
Q: Whats the difference between a
Day 69 Christmas alphabet and the regular
Q: What do elves learn in school? alphabet?
A: The elf-abet. A: The Christmas alphabet has Noel.

Day 70 Day 78
Q: What do you get if you cross a pine Q: What happened to the man who
tree with an apple? stole a calendar from the store?
A: A pine-apple. A: He got 12 months.

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A Joke-A-Day 6
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 79 Day 88
Q: Why was Santas helper sad? Knock, knock.
A: Because he had low elf-esteem. Whos there?
Wet.
Day 80 Wet who?
Q: What does Santa clean his sleigh Wet me in, its raining out here!
with?
A: Comet. Day 89
Q: If a butcher wears a size XL shirt
Day 81 and a size 13 shoe, what does he weigh?
Q: What did the stamp say to the A: Meat.
envelope?
A: Im stuck on you. Day 90
Q: What did the baker say to his wife?
Day 82 A: Im dough-nuts about you!
Q: What did the paper clip say to the
magnet? Day 91
A: I find you very attractive. Q: What did the squirrel give for
Valentines Day?
Day 83 A: Forget-me-nuts.
Q: What kind of flower do you never
want to get on Valentines Day? Day 92
A: Cauliflower. Q: What do you call two birds in love?
A: Tweet-hearts.
Day 84
Q: What do elephants say to one Day 93
another on Valentines Day? Knock, knock.
A: I love you a ton. Whos there?
Arthur.
Day 85 Arthur who?
Q: Whats easy to get into, but hard to Arthur anymore chocolates left?
get out of?
A: Trouble. Day 94
Q: What did the monster ask his
Day 86 sweetheart?
Q: Why is the forest so noisy? A: Will you be my Valen-slime?
A: Because the trees have bark.
Day 95
Day 87 Q: What did the boy pickle say to the
Q: What has an eye, but cannot see? girl pickle?
A: A needle (or potato, tornado, hurricane, etc.). A: You mean a great dill to me.

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A Joke-A-Day 7
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 96 Day 103


Q: What did the farmer give his wife Q: What did the snowman order at
for Valentines Day? Wendys?
A: Hogs and kisses. A: A Frosty!

Day 97 Day 104


Q: What did the owl say to his Q: Why cant skeletons play music?
sweetheart? A: Because they have no organs.
A: Owl be yours.
Day 105
Day 98 Q: How do you catch an unusual
Q: What did the calculator say to the rabbit?
other calculator on Valentines Day? A: Unique up on it.
A: Let me count the ways I love you.
Day 106
Q: Whats the best way to talk to a
T-Rex?
A: From a distance.

Day 107
Q: What kind of music do mummies
like best?
A: Wrap.
Day 99
Q: What did one piece of string say to Day 108
the other piece of string? Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?
A: Will you be my Valen-twine? A: Because it was the chickens day off.

Day 100 Day 109


Q: Why did the boy bring a ladder to Q: Where can you learn to make ice
school? cream?
A: He wanted to go to high school. A: At Sundae School.

Day 101 Day 110


Q: What are there a lot of when Q: Why did the boy run around his bed?
turkeys play baseball? A: He was trying to catch up on his sleep.
A: Fowl balls.
Day 111
Day 102 Q: What do you call an elephant in a
Q: Where do pencils go for vacation? phone booth?
A: Pencil-vania. A: Stuck!

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A Joke-A-Day 8
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 112 Day 121


Q: How does the Easter Bunny travel? Q: Whats a rabbits favorite kind of
A: By hare-plane. music?
A: Hip-hop.
Day 113
Q: What runs but never walks? Day 122
A: A hose. Q: Wheres a walls favorite place to
meet his friends?
Day 114 A: At the corner.
Q: Which flower talks the most?
A: Tulips, because they have two lips. Day 123
Q: Where did the king keep his army?
Day 115 A: In his sleeve.
Q: What did the spoon say to the
knife? Day 124
A: Youre so sharp! Q: Why dont animals eat clowns?
A: They taste funny!
Day 116
Q: How did the hairdresser win the Day 125
race? Q: Where do books hide when theyre
A: She knew a shortcut. scared?
A: Under their covers.
Day 117
Q: Why are fish so smart? Day 126
A: Because they are always in a school. Q: Whats a scarecrows favorite fruit?
A: Strawberries.
Day 118
Q: What did the dinner plate say to the Day 127
cup? Q: Why cant the elephant use the
A: Dinners on me tonight. computer?
A: Because hes afraid of the mouse.
Day 119
Q: What did the circle say to the Day 128
triangle? Knock, knock.
A: I dont see your point. Whos there?
Who.
Day 120 Who who?
Q: Whats black and white over and Is there an owl in here?
over again?
A: A penguin rolling down a hill.

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A Joke-A-Day 9
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 129 Day 137


Q: What do ghosts use to wash their Q: Why is 1+1=3 like your left foot?
hair? A: Its not right.
A: Sham-BOO.
Day 138
Day 130 Q: Where do kids in New York City
Q: What did the carrot say to the learn multiplication?
mushroom? A: In Times Square.
A: Youre a fungi (fun guy).
Day 139
Day 131 Q: Why did everyone want the music
Q: What did the hamburger name her teacher to be on their baseball team?
daughter? A: Because she had the perfect pitch.
A: Patty.
Day 140
Day 132 Q: Why are elephants such bad
Q: What do a car and an elephant have dancers?
in common? A: Because they have two left feet.
A: They both have trunks.
Day 141
Day 133 Q: What starts and ends with e and
Knock, knock. only has one letter?
Whos there? A: An envelope.
Tank.
Tank who?
Youre welcome!

Day 134
Q: Why do cowboys ride horses?
A: Because theyre too heavy to carry.

Day 135
Q: What is a math teachers favorite
type of dessert?
A: Pi. Day 142
Knock, knock.
Day 136 Whos there?
Q: Why was the cafeteria clock always Cows go.
behind? Cows go who?
A: Because it went back for seconds. No, silly, cows go MOO!

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A Joke-A-Day 10
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 143 Day 151


Q: Whats a math teachers favorite Q: How did the boy react when his
tool? turtle died?
A: Multipliers. A: He was shell-shocked.

Day 144 Day 152


Knock, knock. Q: Whats a spiders favorite thing to
Whos there? do on a computer?
Cash. A: Make websites.
Cash who?
No, thanks, I prefer peanuts. Day 153
Q: What kind of table can you have for
Day 145 dinner?
Q: What should you do if your teacher A: A vege-table.
rolls her eyes at you?
A: Roll them back, of course! Day 154
Q: Whats a librarians favorite type of
Day 146 bait when fishing?
Q: Why do bees have sticky hair? A: Bookworms.
A: Because they have honeycombs.
Day 155
Day 147 Q: What did one eye say to the other?
Knock, knock. A: Between you and I, something smells.
Whos there?
Pecan. Day 156
Pecan who? Q: Why did the girl put lipstick on her
Pecan someone your own size! head?
A: Because she wanted to make-up her mind
Day 148
Q: Why didnt the oven go to college? Day 157
A: Because it had a lot of degrees already. Q: Whats a cannibals favorite sport?
A: Football.
Day 149
Q: What did the teacher do at the Day 158
beach? Q: What did the ocean say to the
A: She tested the water. beach?
A: Nothing, it just waved.
Day 150
Q: What time is it when you have a
toothache?
A: Tooth Hurty.

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A Joke-A-Day 11
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 159
Q: What do you call a worm with no
teeth?
A: A gummy worm.

Day 160
Q: Why was the computer cold?
A: Because it left the Windows open!

Day 161
Q: Why do eggs hate jokes?
A: Because they crack up. Day 167
Q: Whats the smartest insect around?
Day 162 A: The spelling bee.
Q: What type of dog loves going to the
groomer? Day 168
A: A shampoodle. Q: Why did the cabbage beat the carrot
in a race?
Day 163 A: Because it was a-head.
Q: What did the doctor diagnose the
horse with when he wasnt feeling Day 169
well? Knock, knock.
A: Hay fever. Whos there?
Leaf.
Day 164 Leaf who?
Q: Why do birds fly south for the Leaf me alone please, Im thinking.
winter?
A: Because its too far to walk. Day 170
Q: Why dont ducks tell jokes when
Day 165 they fly?
Knock, knock. A: They would quack up!
Whos there?
Nobel. Day 171
Nobel who? Q: Whats a bats favorite pastime?
Theres nobel, thats why Im knocking. A: Hanging out with his friends.

Day 166 Day 172


Q: What lies at the bottom of the Q: Where do polar bears keep their
ocean and worries? money?
A: A nervous wreck. A: In snow banks.

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A Joke-A-Day 12
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 173 Day 181


Knock, knock. Q: Whats a cats favorite nursery
Whos there? rhyme?
Canoe. A: Three Blind Mice.
Canoe who?
Canoe help me with my homework Day 182
please? Knock, knock.
Whos there?
Day 174 Nana.
Q: How do bears keep their den cool in Nana who?
the summer? Nana your business.
A: They use bear-conditioning.
Day 183
Day 175 Q: Why did the dog keep tripping?
Q: Why was the clown crying? A: Because she had two left feet.
A: Because he broke his funny bone.
Day 184
Day 176 Q: What did the duck say to the clown?
Q: What did the paper say to A: You quack me up!
encourage the pencil?
A: Write on, good friend! Day 185
Q: Where do baby pens spend their
Day 177 day?
Q: Where can you always find a A: In their play pen.
peacock?
A: In the dictionary. Day 186
Knock, knock.
Day 178 Whos there?
Q: What is a tops favorite ride at the Needle.
amusement park? Needle who?
A: The merry-go-round. Needle little more money for this toy
please.
Day 179
Q: What is a kittens favorite dessert? Day 187
A: Mice cream. Q: What has 18 legs and catches flies?
A: A baseball team.
Day 180
Q: Where did the bird go when he lost Day 188
a feather? Q: Why is it not a good idea to try to
A: The re-tail shop. trick a snake?
A: Because you cant pull his leg.

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A Joke-A-Day 13
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

Day 189 Day 194


Knock, knock. Q: What did the
Whos there? farmer say to
Yukon. the horse when
Yukon who? he walked in the
Yukon a let us in? Its raining out here! barn?
A: Why the long face?
Day 190
Q: What was the bankers favorite Day 195
player on the football team? Q: How long
A: The quarterback. should an
elephants legs be?
Day 191 A: Long enough to reach the ground.
Knock, knock.
Whos there? Day 196
Banana. Q: What do you call a left-handed dog?
Banana who? A: A south paw.
Knock, knock.
Whos there? Day 197
Banana. Q: What gives you the power to walk
Banana who? through a wall?
Knock, knock. A: A door.
Whos there?
Banana. Day 198
Banana who? Q: Why did the book join the police
Knock, knock. force?
Whos there? A: He wanted to go undercover.
Orange.
Orange who? Day 199
Orange you glad I didnt say banana? Q: What did the students do when
their shoelaces got tangled together?
Day 192 A: They went on a class trip.
Q: What bird loves construction work?
A: A crane. Day 200
Q: Why do bananas have to put
Day 193 sunscreen on before they go to the
Q: Why couldnt the boy go to the beach?
pirate movie? A: Because they peel!
A: Because it was rated ARRR!

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A Joke-A-Day 14
200 Kid-Friendly Jokes For The Classroom

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