The Tale of Macbeth.

In Five Minutes.

In Limericks.

Adapted by Chris Neville-Smith from the play by William Shakespeare

The Cast (in order of appearance):

Thissketchiswrittenforaminimumoffiveactors(3male,1female,and1narratorofeithersex).Wherefiveactorsare
used,itisrecommendedthepartsareallocatedasfollows:
Chorus(1)
Macbeth(2) King'sGeneral,laterThaneofCawdor,laterKingofScotland
Banquo(3) King'sGeneral
Witch(4) Oneofthreewitchsisters
Duncan(5) KingofScotland
Malcolm(3) Duncan'ssonandheirtothethrone
LadyMacbeth(4) WifeofMacbeth
Macduff(5) LeaderoftheresistancetoMacbeth'srule
Siward(3) AfighterinMacduff'sarmy

Atapush,thiscanalsobeperformedbyfouractorsifthechorus'slinesandsplitamongsttheotheractors.
However,thisisreallymeanttobeperformedwitheveryoneyoucangetyourhandson:themore,themerrier.Ifyouhave
enoughpeople,feelfreeto,say,turntheonewithbackintothree,oractuallyhavesoldiersandguardsonstagethiscanbe
donewithsmalltweaks.

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 The Tale of Macbeth. In Five Minutes. In Limericks.
TheChorusstandsstandsatalectern.
Chorus: ThereoncewasamancalledMacbeth:
Ataletheytellwithhushedbreath.
Forherosefromathane,
Toaking,buthisreign
Waspackedfullofmurderanddeath.

MacbethandBanquoenterasiftheyareexploring.
Narrator: InScotland,onenightlongago.
Dwelttwogenerals,MacbethandBanquo.
Macbeth(gesturingoffstage):GoodLord,whoisthere?
Banquo: Withthehatandthehair?
Awitchapproachesthem.MacbethandBanquoshudder.
Witch: I'mawitchsister,I'llhaveyouknow!

(ToMacbeth:)MysistersandIallagree
ThatKingoftheScotsyoushallbe!
(ToBanquo:)Butyoursonandheir,
Wewitchesdeclare
ShallleadagreatScotdynasty!(Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!)
TheWitchexitslaughing.Banquoshrugsandexits.

Chorus: MacbethspoketoKingDuncanlater.
Duncanenterslookingupset.
Duncan: MyThaneofCawdor'sbeenatraitor!
LadyMacbethenters,handsMacbethaseveredhead,thenexits.MacbethpresentstheheadtoDuncan.
Macbeth: Well,I'vechoppedoffhishead.
Duncan: Great!You'llbethaneinstead!
ForI'msureyou'llgetgreaterandgreater.

Speakingofwhich,Imustchoose
Asuccessortostepinmyshoes.
Macbethlookshopefulinanticipation,butDuncangesturesMalcolmontostage.
Duncan: Itshallbemylad.
Malcolm: Wow!Thanksforthat,Dad!
Macbeth(withcontempt):Yes,whatwonderful,wonderfulnews.

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LadyMacbethenterswithaknife.
Chorus: SoMacbethtoldthenewstohiswife.
LadyMacbeth: Letusformagreatplotonhislife!
Hisplanswemustscupper!
Invitehimtosupper,
Thenyouknowtodo,here'stheknife!
Withthiswords,LadyMacbethpushestheknifeintoherhusband'shands,justasDuncanenters,yawningandstretching.
Macbethhidestheknifebehindhisback.

Chorus: SotheKingcameforsupperandsaid:
Malcolm: IthinkI'llretiretobed.
LadyMacbethgesturesDuncantoacomfysofa,whichhefallsasleepin,theeyesMacbethtodothedeed.Macbeth
gingerlyapproachesDuncanwiththeknife,butanotherknifefloatsonstagebeforehiseyes(probablywithapieceof
stringandastick).
Chorus: ButMacbethindelusion,
Sawbladesinillusion.
MacbethgritshisteethandstabsMalcolmthreetimeswiththeknife.
Duncan(intimetothestabs):I'mdead!I'mdead!I'mdead!

Malcolmrushesinjustintimetoseehisdeadfather.Macbethhideshisknifebehindhisbackagain..
Malcolm: Murder!You'vemurderedtheKing!
Macbeth: Isthatso?
Chorus: ...saidMacbethwithagrin.
LadyMacbeth: Areyouhavingusframed?
Macbeth: Youshouldbequiteashamed!
Macbeth&LadyMacbeth:Guards!Itwasn'tus,itwashim!
Malcolmrunsaway.MacbethtakesthecrownfromDuncan'sbodyandsitsonathrone.LadyMacbethdragshisbodyoff.

Chorus: Butnosoonerthantakingthethrone.
Camethefearsthathe'dbeoverthrown.
LadyMacbethreturns,affectionatetoMacbeth,easingaswordintohishand.
LadyMacbeth: Macbeth,justahitch,
It'sthewordsofthatwitch,
Now,youwouldn'twantBanquo'ssongrown?

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MacbethbegrudginglyexitsandreturnsdragginginBanquo.
Macbeth: Banquo,I'mslayingyourson!
Banquo: Hah!You'retoolate!Itoldhimtorun!
He'sovertheborder!
MacbethstabsBanquo.
Banquo: Hey,that'soutoforder!
Banquofallsdowndead.LadyMacbethcomfortsMacbeth.
LadyMacbeth: We'llfindhim,we'llseethatit'sdone.

LadyMacbethremovesBanquo.
Chorus: ButinEnglandrebelliongrew.
Macduffentersmenacingly,remainingononesideofthestage,callingtoMacbethontheother.
Macduff: Ifyoufearforyourfuture,it'strue!
Letmeshow,
Chorus: saidMacDuff,
Macduff: Thatenoughisenough!
Youarefinished,you'redonefor,you'rethrough!

ThewitchenterstheothersidetospeaktoMalcolm.
Witch: Macbeth,Ibreakmorenewstothee!
Macduffisyournewenemy!
Macbeth: ThenhiscastleinFife,
Withhischidrenandwife,
Shallbewipedoutbyroyaldecree!

Witch: Ah,butfearnot!YoushallbeKingtill
BrinamwoodmeetsDunsinaneHill.
Andwhat'smore:Iwarn
Thatanyoneborn
Ofawoman,whofightsyou,you'llkill!(Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!)
Thewitchexitslaughing.SiwardrushesacrossthestagetoMacduff.

Macduff: YoungSiward,whatnewsdoyoubring?
Siward: It'syourfamily,slainbytheking!
Macduff: Why,themurderousswine.
Verywell,itistime:
Letusfight,letusdie,letuswin!

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MacduffandSiwardexit.MacbethseesLadyMacbethsleepwalkingacrossthestage.
Chorus: BackinScotland,inafeelingofgloom
WalkedtheQueeninhersleeproundtheroom.
MalcolmandBanquo,bothasghosts,floataroundMacbeth.
Malcolm: Whoo!Canyouhearourscreams?
Banquo: Yes!We'rehauntingyourdreams,
MalcolmandBanquo:Withyourfutureofdownfalldoom!

MalcolmandBanquofloat.LadyMacbethentersinapanic,holdingaknifeandabottleofpoison.
LadyMacbeth: Dear,anarmy'sarrivedoutofgate.
Let'sescapefromahorriblefate!
MacbethfacesawayfromLadyMacbethtowardstheaudience.
Macbeth: Butwait!Don'tyousee
Itisourdestiny...
AsMacbethspeaks,LadyMacbethquicklydrinksthepoison,stabsherselfwiththeknifeandfallsdowndead.
Macbeth: Totriumphand...(seesLadyMacbethdead)oh,I'mtoolate.

Siwardsneaksonstagehidingbehindasmalltreebranchheisholding.HecallsouttoMacbeth,drawinghissword.
Siward: Macbeth,youdirtyoldrat!
Macbeth: Ifyoubeatme,thenI'lleatmyhat.
I'lldefeatyouwithease!
Comeon,wherearethetrees?
Siwardholdsuphisbranch.
Siward: (Youmeanthis?)
Macbeth: Ohright,Ididnotthinkofthat.

Macbethdrawshissword,sodoesSiward,andtheyexchangeafewswipes.
Macbeth: Still,I'vegotonemoretrickupmysleeve.
Bornofawoman,Ibelieve?
Siward: OfcourseIwas.Why?
Macbeth: 'Causeyou'regoingtodie!
MacbethstabsSiward,whofallsdowndead.
Macbeth: ArethereanymoreheadsIcancleave?

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Macduffenters,alsohidingbehindabranch.Asheenters,hethrowsthebranchaway,anddrawshissword.
Macduff: Holdon,Macbeth,notsofast.
Yourreignisathingofthepast!
Letusfightinaduel.
Macbeth: Sobeit,youfool!
I'llseetoitthatit'syourlast.
MacbethandMacduffhaveaquickswordfight.

Macbeth: I'llbebeatenbynomanonearth!
Macduff: EventhoseofCaesarianbirth?
Macbeth: Hmm...thatwasn'tmadeclear.
Areyousaying...(realises)Ohdear.
Macduff: Nowputthemup,showwhatyou'reworth!

MacbethandMacdufffight.Afterafewstrokes,MacduffkillsMacbeth.
Chorus: AndsoitwasMacbethwasslain.
Fatewasbothhisfriendandhisbane.
Malcolmenters.MacdufftakesthecrownfromMacbeth,placesitonMalcolm'shead,andhesitsonthethrone.
Chorus: Withthebattlethenwon,
Duncan'sfavouriteson,
Becameking,foragloriousreign.
Allgetupandbow.

Thankyouforreadingthissamplescript.ChrisNevilleSmith,2006/2012.Permissiongrantedto
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