Butt Out!

By Cirrus

Prologue:
Harumi sat primly in her chair across the desk from her editor, carefully watching his reaction to the notes she had scribbled in preparation of the new story.
Unfortunately, he did his best evaluating in silence.
"Generally...I like it." He said at last. Harumi's face lit up.
"I knew you would, sir! thank you sir!"
"I'll get in touch with their management and work out the fine details. You will probably know the rest in a few days. But, speaking personally...do you honestly
think you can do it?"
She smiled proudly. "I kicked the habit myself five years ago. If I can do it, I'm sure I can get Shinhwa to."
"Very well, I believe I know your success history well enough to give you the green light. We'll have you in Korea in, hmm, one week."
"Thank you so much sir!" She bowed graciously to her manager and took the plans off his desk, resisting the urge to go skipping merrily out the door of the
office. Once the door was closed, she walked very primly to her own office and shut the door quietly. Then she took out her Discman and danced like crazy all
around her office, ecstatic that she had got her way.

Enough goofing around, miss professional! Time to get to work already. She warmed up her knuckles and started typing up an email:

Harumi Murasaki, staff writer for the popular Japanese teen magazine SODAPOP, has been given the go-ahead to start a two part article on Korean super group
Shinhwa. Murasaki, known for her popular offbeat column topics, is headed for Korea with one goal on her mind: STOP SHINHWA FROM SMOKING!

Can she do it?

Is she priming herself for failure?
Will she be victorious?
It will be an epic journalistic event, not to be missed by any Shinhwa fan OR SODAPOP reader!

Harumi typed in the email addresses of Shinhwa's publicists and clicked "Send."
Day One:

I'm happily settled at CAMP O-2, which is what I've renamed Shinhwa's house. As they'll need constant supervision so that I'll know they aren't going back on
their word, I will be living with them for two weeks. For the next fourteen days, their every move will be MONITORED! I can't WAIT! This is the ultimate
dream of any Shinhwa fan!

I started the project first thing in the morning, with a meeting in the living room...

Harumi sat in a chair, swinging her legs back and forth. She was barely over five feet tall, but inside that tiny body was enough manic energy to run a nuclear
power plant. She frowned as she observed the empty room, the problem being that--it was empty!

THUD...THUD...THUD...her face brightened as the six young men tromped wearily in, none of them looking especially happy.
"Good morning, boys! have a seat!" chirped Harumi, gesturing to the couches that faced each other. She noted that they all looked hung over and extremely
grumpy, with the exception of Dongwan. Kim Dongwan, the only one that did NOT have a tobacco addiction to kick, was grinning like a madman.
His band mates on the other hand...
"I can't believe we agreed to this...dude..." Minwoo grumbled, feeling his way to the couch and sitting on top of Hyesung. Hyesung misinterpreted this signal as
Minwoo wanting a morning cuddle, and flung him halfway across the room.
"WE AREN'T ON TV! GETOFFA ME!!"
"...raah..." It was still too early in the morning for Minwoo to come up with a good comeback to this. All he could manage was "...raah..."
"Alright guys! are we settled in?" Harumi asked.
"Ready when you are--OW!" Dongwan's perky statement was cut short as JunJin slugged him in the arm. Harumi was already writing notes on a clipboard.

"Alright, so let's do a roll call. Minwoo, Eric and Andy?"

She got numerous responses at once from the three of them.

"Yeah."--Minwoo
"Here."--Andy
"Whatever."--Eric
"I hate you, wicked wicked woman"--Minwoo
"I wanna go back to sleep."--Eric
"I want my mommy..."--Andy

"Dongwan, JunJin and Hyesung?"

"GOOD MORNING!! Isn't it a beautiful day to stop smoking?"--Dongwan

"Shut the hell up, Dongwan...Who are you again?"--JunJin
"Don't touch me."--Hyesung

"OHH-KAY! Let's begin our journey to a longer life and optimal health, without cigarettes! YEAH!" Harumi cheered. No one echoed her sentiments. Instead,
she got five pairs of bleary eyes glaring at her (Dongwan was still smiling).
"Now let me start off by saying, I'm not going to make you quit all at once. The plan is to gradually wane you guys off the tobacco one day at a time." She said,
noting that they slightly perked up at that point.
"So...how much are we gonna have, say, today?" Andy asked.
"You will each be able to smoke no more than THREE cigarettes a day, for the next three days." Shinhwa looked somewhat revived at that prospect. Hardly
giving her time to finish her sentence, Eric frantically took a pack of Camels out of the pocket of his t-shirt and passed one around to each member, with
Dongwan being the exception of course. They groped blindly for lighters and took deep, soothing drags once they were lit. A huge cloud of gray smoke filled
up the living room, as Harumi tried her best to breathe normally through all the exhaust. They started chatting with each other and being much friendlier,
Harumi noted. So this is how much they depend on smoking to get along...amazing she thought. Well, after this is over, they'll discover how much tighter their
bond is--if they don't kill each other in the process..
Harumi took a packet of paper out of her "magical fun tobacco-free bag" and started handing them to the guys. On it was written:

I, ___________________ (<--name here)

hereby pledge that I will put 500% into quitting cigarettes, because I want to improve my health and extend my life. I know that smoking does not control me: I
can overcome my addiction.

signed _______________________

"This is a joke, right?" Hyesung asked Harumi with a vengeful gleam in his eye. She giggled like a child on Christmas day.
"Nope nope nope! I came here to help you guys free yourself from the evils of smoking, and I fully intend to carry out my mission. So sign your pledges like
you mean it!" she declared. Eric stood up, pointing to JunJin and Hyesung.
"You guys, come with us...Shinhwa huddle." They all moved to a corner of the room away from Harumi and stood in a tight circle. All she could hear was a
low, rumbling. At last, Eric stood out from the group.
"All right...we'll do it. On ONE condition--" He told Harumi. She smiled appreciatively.
"Yes, anything."
"Minwoo wants you to flash him. Every day."
Her smile slowly faded. "What?" Maybe my Korean isn't as good I as I thought it was...but I did major in it at College...I had to have heard that wrong...
"Yep, you heard him right. And uh, if I like what I see...Andy wants you to flash him as well. We're the only ones that need extra motivation." Minwoo piped
up.
"I--I..." Harumi was finally losing her cool. She had been very patient with them this morning, she wasn't ready to be defeated.
"Ok...I'll do it. If that's what it'll take..." her cheeks were bright pink and she stuttered a little.
"YES! I AM DA MAN! I GET TO SEE A NAKED LADY EVERY DAY! WHOOHOO!" Minwoo did a victory breakdance. "Now how about that second
smoke? Anyone?"
Harumi handed him the pledge sheet and a pen, and he willingly scratched his name across the line. The other members of Shinhwa looked at each other, took a
deep breath and did the same.
Dongwan smiled smugly to himself.
Day Two:

Their press agents told me that they would be appearing on a talk show today, and I was of course permitted to tag along. It was so much fun being around all
of these other celebrities and the television studio! Sadly, many other Korean celebrities also smoke. Maybe seeing Shinhwa quit will give them the motivation
to kick the habit themselves--but if they don't, I'll always be around to coach whoever needs it! I also interviewed a few of the Shinhwa fans outside the studio,
to show the boys how much the public does care about their favorite gasoos' health.

"I need more concealer!" yelled out one of the makeup artists. Hyesung looked anywhere but at the mirror, humiliated.
"Hyesung, Hyesung, Hyesung...how many times have I told you to lay off the late nights? these bags under your eyes are so deep, I can carry groceries in
them!" She scolded him.
"I know, I know...it's because I'm trying to quit smoking...and it sorta kept me up all night..." He said quietly, as the artist swabbed more foundation underneath
his eyes.
"Whats that? You're quitting?" She asked him. He nodded.
"Not like I WANT to, of course--"
"Oh Hyesung, that's great! Did you hear that, everyone? Hyesung is going to stop smoking!" She announced to everyone else in the makeup room.
The other members of Shinhwa, also in chairs getting ready for TV, sighed sadly to themselves.
"That's great! I wish I had the courage to quit!"
"Go guys!"
"AAGGHHH!!! WRINKLES!!!" Minwoo's stylist screamed across the room. Everyone turned to see Minwoo with a mirror held close to his face, staring into it
with aghast horror and poking at his cheek.
"I...I...I don't know what to do..." He whispered crazily. "A wrinkle? on my beautiful, young, sexy face?"
"It's from the cigarettes! Can't you see?" Harumi jumped up from the chair she had been sitting in and pointed dramatically at Minwoo. "It ruins your skin! It
speeds up the aging process! You're already seeing the effects!"
"Will someone PLEASE SHUT HER UP?" Eric snapped, rolling his eyes.
"My face...my face...someone please help me..." Minwoo begged.
The producer popped his head in to remind them: "Five minutes until show time."
Minwoo's frantic makeup artist hurled a tube of liquid liner at the producer, who quickly ran away.
"There's nothing we can do to fix him, I don't have enough time! WAIT! YOU COME BACK HERE!" She yelled at the producer, chasing after him. Harumi
heard her pleading with the producer in the hallway: "Please tell the camera man not to focus on the right side of Minwoo's face...thank you so much. I'm really
sorry about this...again, thank you..."

It was time to go on. Dongwan only needed minimal makeup and some gel in his hair *because not smoking means he had nothing to hide*. Hyesung's stylist
blasted him with a last minute powdering, JunJin practiced his smile in the mirror one last time and Andy had to pull the mirror out of Minwoo's shell-shocked
hand while Eric gave him a long pep talk about flattering camera angles and botox. Minwoo was somewhat back to normal by the time they were on stage,
dancing their dance and doing the charming interviews like usual. It was all a part of showbiz.

Meanwhile, Harumi took her digital video camera outside to have a little chat with the fans that had gathered to see Shinhwa. Her first interviewee was a small
girl with pigtails.
"What's your name, honey?"
"Glori!"
"Are you a big Shinhwa fan?"
"YAH!"
"Do you know that your Shinhwa oppas smoke lots of bad bad cigarettes?"
Glori's brown eyes became huge.
"They--they do? But--that's bad!! my Shinhwa oppas shouldn't smoke!"
"There there, don't be afraid. Do you want to help them stop?"
She nodded vigorously.
"Well, good. Thanks for letting me chat with you. Do your other friends also love Shinhwa and care about their health?"
She nodded again.
"Then take these--" Harumi pulled a stack of flyers out of her jacket and handed them to Glori--"and give them to your friends."
"Um--OK! byebye lady!"

Harumi smiled and looked for another girl in the crowd to interview. She settled on a spunky-looking teenager.
"Hi!" Harumi said brightly to the girl. She turned and flashed a dazzling smile to the camera.
"Hiya! What's the camera for? Am I on camera? COOL! HI MOM!!"
"I'm a reporter from the Japanese teen magazine SODAPOP. I was hoping to ask you a few questions about Shinhwa?" Harumi began. The girl nodded.
"What is your name?"
"Dahye. What's your name?"
"Uh, Harumi. I'd like to know your thoughts on Shinhwa's smoking habits."
Dahye's face changed and she clenched her hands into little fists.
"My thoughts? MY THOUGHTS? IMMA KILL THEM! THEY'RE RUINING THEIR VOICES AND GETTING LUNG CANCER!" Other people in the
crowd turned to see who was yelling, then moved away slightly. "MINWOO, YOU JERK! IMMA KILL YOU IF YOU DON'T DIE OF LUNG CANCER
FIRST!"
Harumi started sweating as Dahye moved threateningly toward the camera.
"Thank you, thank you for your time! that's just what we needed for the interview! Now you can go back to whatever you were doing, that's great...oh, and pass
these around if you could!" Harumi took a second bundle of papers out of her jacket and held them out to the girl, who took them and handed them around, still
muttering angrily to herself.

They had time for two more people.

Interviewee number three was a pretty girl named Stephanie.

"So, Stephanie, out here to see Shinhwa?"
"Shinhwa's on the show today? aw CRAP! I thought today was Fly To The Sky! Gaah dammit, I blew off a chemistry test to see Fany and he's not even here?"
the poor girl was getting so worked up that her glasses were fogging. "What was it that you wanted again?" She asked Harumi.
"I wanted to hear your opinion on Shinhwa and their smoking."
She thought for a moment. "Well, I guess a lot of people in Korea smoke. It never really bugged me before to see celebrities doing it. If they want to smoke, I
guess there's nothing I can do to stop them. They seem to be doing alright."
Harumi's voice was full of malice. "That's what you think. Inside, they're charred and burned from the ashes and smoke. They have tar dripping from their
lungs."
Stephanie looked frightened.
"They do? Ashes and tar and burned?"
"Yes. They DO. Just like everyone else that smokes cigarettes."
"I'm, um...I'm going to go over there now...thanks for talking with me..." Stephanie edged away from Harumi, smiling and nodding in a "please leave me alone"
way.
"WAIT! Take these anti-smoking pamphlets with you!" Harumi called out, waving her papers at Stephanie. She screamed and ran away.

Upset at herself for that last disastrous interview, Harumi's last subject was an innocent-looking schoolgirl that held up a sign saying "I WILL BE
DONGWAN'S PERFECT WIFE!"
"Hello. Would you mind if I interviewed you?"
The girl shook her head no.
"Ok, great. How old are you?"
"Thirty-six." The girl whispered.
Harumi's eyes widened. "But you look so young!"
"I know. It helps me at my job."
"Which is...?"
"Stripper."
"Uh, that's nice. You're a Shinhwa fan, right?"
"Oh yeah. They're so fuckin' hot. I wanna do such nasty, dirty things to them...hu-ha. Things that would get us arrested in this country." The girl said, taking out
a cigarette, lighting it and puffing dreamily.
Harumi: O_O;;;;;;
The stripper continued. "I'm gonna try to meet up with them after the show...and go home with one of 'em today...Hopefully Dongwan, HU-HA!. I'll tie
Dongwan to the bed by his socks, and rip his--"
"Thank you very much! that's all the interviewing I need today! you've been a wonderful participant, thank you thank you thank you--" Harumi interrupted,
shutting off the camera and walking quickly back to the studio.
Shinhwa fans...yikes... She thought to herself. This video will need a little editing, but it's not quite a lost cause...

The TV show had ended just as she got back to the studio. Shinhwa came off stage smiling and happy as usual.
"Hey, it's our parole officer!" Minwoo said with a twinkle in his eye. He pulled Harumi over to a corner.
"Hey--our deal. You're still in, right?"
She sighed. "Yeah, I'm in."
He smiled evilly. "Let's go into that janitor's closet over there."

...several minutes later...

"HEY ANDY!" Minwoo yelled, opening the door of the closet and casually strutting out with an ear-to-ear grin on his face.
Andy looked up and blushed. "Is she worth quitting smokes?"
"I'd better be." Harumi muttered, pulling her shirt back down as she closed the door behind her.
"She is. Oh boy, is she ever." Minwoo nudged him with an elbow.
"Ok, I'll um...I'll...later...ok Harumi?" Andy ran out of the room, covering his bright pink ears.
Day Three:

I showed Shinhwa the interviews that I had taped the previous day. They were visibly moved and touched by how caring their fans were. After the video, I
could tell that they were really starting to get serious about quitting their bad habit! One of them even pledged to quit cigarettes that very moment after seeing
the video!
Working together, Harumi and Shinwha can accomplish anything!

"JunJin, why do you look so sad?"

"I just had my third cigarette...and it's only 4PM..." JunJin could hardly get the last word out before his voice broke with emotion. Harumi ran to his side and
hugged his knees.
"Don't cry, Mister tough guy! This is just another sign of how dependent you've grown on your smoking! When you quit, you'll look back on this whole thing
and laugh!"
"I'm not crying...there's just something in my eye." He said defensively.
"Oh, of course of course..." Harumi patted him on the head and called the other members to the living room.
"Boys! Come on out here, I have something to show you all!"
They came, looking tired. Dongwan was chewing gum. Harumi looked at him suspiciously.
"Dongwan...where did you get that?"
He pointed to his cheek, looking innocent. "This?"
Harumi nodded. "Yes, the gum in your mouth."
"Uh, one of the guys gave it to me. I don't remember who, I got three little boxes of it at once. They were sitting on my desk in my room, so I just sorta
figured--"
Harumi's eye twitched as she angrily spat out "That's special NICOTINE gum! It was meant for THEM, not you! Fess up! who gave it to him?"
The guys huddled together and backed away, looking frightened. Dongwan just looked confused.
"She's spooky when she gets mad..." Hyesung whispered. The others nodded in agreement, but no one admitted to giving the gum to Dongwan. Harumi seemed
to be breathing fire, but after a minute of silence she threw up her hands and turned away.
"Never mind. I'll punish you ALL later. For now, I want to show you guys something that I did yesterday while you were taping the tv show. Sit, sit down...why
aren't you sitting? SIT!"

They cautiously broke apart and moved in little groups of three to sit down on the living room couches, their eyes not leaving Harumi as they were all
convinced that she was going to attack them at any vulnerable moment. She popped a tape into their VCR and it automatically started playing.

Harumi had looked through the video many times to see what she could do to make it a tool worthy of anti-tobacco pride. Using her powers of video editing for
good, she had cut away snippets of the interviews to make her subjects seem a little saner, and more to the point. So the finished product looked something like
this:

First Interview With Glori:

Harumi: Are you a big Shinhwa fan?
Glori: YAH! *brief pause where footage was spliced* My Shinhwa oppas shouldn't smoke!
Harumi: Do your other friends also love Shinhwa and care about their health?
Glori: YAH!

Second Interview With Dahye:

Harumi: I'd like to know your thoughts on Shinhwa's smoking habits?
Dahye: THEY'RE RUINING THEIR VOICES AND GETTING LUNG CANCER! *rest of Dahye's interview footage cut*

Third Interview with Stephanie:

Stephanie *edited to death*: aw CRAP! there's nothing I can do to stop them. Ashes and tar and burned? Gaah dammit...

The fourth interview with the disturbed stripper had been scrapped entirely, as Harumi tried her hardest but could not piece together anything remotely close to
an anti-smoking message in that one. Oh well, three was better than nothing...

Shinhwa sat in dazed silence watching the video.

"There's something not quite right about this..." Eric said out loud, scratching above his ear.
"Shh. Trying to watch." Minwoo scolded. The movie went on.

Harumi voice-over as footage is shown of the girls passing anti-smoking propaganda out into the crowd: "Fans dedicated to extending Shinhwa's life and health
hand out homemade flyers that detail the health risks of smoking and encourage the fans to help Shinhwa quit!"
The tape went blank and Harumi stood in front of the TV, turning on the lights to get their attention back to her.

"Well guys, what did you think?"

Hyesung's angelic face was mirror-shiny with tears. He launched into a 10 minute rant:
"The fans never seemed to care about our health like that before...before it was always 'oh no, he got in a car accident, I hope his face isn't ruined!' or 'oh no, he
fell out of a helicopter and plunged 500,000 feet to a certain death over the Himalayas, he survived but I hope his face is ok!' or 'oh no, he got EBOLA and
they're talking about amputating something! I hope it's not his cute nose!' it was always about our faces...but now they're caring about
our...LUNGS...and...VOICES..." His rant was temporarily broken by a loud, honking sob.
Eric, Andy, JunJin, Dongwan and Minwoo were staring at him like cows in the path of an oncoming freight train.
"Man...what the fuck are you ON?" Eric had to ask.
"If you ask me, he's been smoking somethin' worse than Kools." JunJin muttered behind his hand.
Hyesung jumped to his feet, pointing his finger at first Eric, then JunJin, then Andy. He would have had to turn around to point at Minwoo, and that would have
ruined the moment. He continued his psychotic lecture.
"Don't you all SEE?! The fans! They care about us! It's not about our pretty faces anymore! It's because they really do care...and they want us to be
healthy...I've...I've never been so moved in my whole life..." He dramatically put his arm over his eyes.

Harumi, who had been standing silent with her mouth on the floor for all of this speech, finally snapped out of her daze and practically leaped her way to
Hyesung, ecstatically throwing her arms around him.
"OH HYESUNG! You've seen the light! At last, at last!"
"OH HARUMI! You're my savior! You've opened my eyes to the light! I can never thank you enough!" They did a little dance of joy together in the living
room.
"OH HYESUNG!"
"OH HARUMI!"
"OH HYESUNG!"
"OH HARUMI!"

The rest of Shinhwa: "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?!"

"Hey, look! there's somethin' extra on this tape!" Minwoo broke the bizarre twilight-zone moment of Hyesung's "awakening" and brought everyone's attention
back to the interview video.

"Oh yeah. They're so fuckin' hot. I wanna do such nasty, dirty things to them...hu-ha. Things that would get us arrested in this country."
(The lady lights a cigarette)
"I'm gonna try to meet up with them after the show...and go home with one of 'em today. Hopefully Dongwan, HU-HA! I'll tie Dongwan to the bed by his
socks, and rip his--"

*tape ends, starts rewinding*

Minwoo turned to see everyone else's reactions, which mirrored pretty much his own. Slack-jawed, bug-eyed. Dongwan looked like he wanted to crawl into a
hole and die from embarrassment (Minwoo, on the other hand, was quite aroused.).
"I...I...I thought I deleted that part..." Harumi said, more to herself then to anyone around her. She fell backward in a swoon and landed in Andy's lap, in a dead
faint. The other guys were in danger of splitting their ribcages open, from laughing so hard.
"Hey ENDEE! Now's your chance!" Dongwan taunted with a smile in his eye.
Andy, of course, blushed all the way to his hairline and tried to push Harumi's unconscious figure off his lap without dumping her onto the floor.
"You want her, Minwoo?" He quietly asked. Minwoo shook his head.
"Nah, that woman on the tape...she was all I needed for today. Hey, let's fast forward it to that part and watch it again!"
"OKAY!" They all cheered.

While the film festival was in full swing, Hyesung stole quietly away and went to his room, where he took four unopened boxes of Camel brand cigarettes out
of a desk drawer and put them inside an empty shoebox. He wrapped a silver sheath of duct tape around the box, then stuck the box in an empty plastic
shopping bag. The shopping bag was wrapped several times with more tape, then put inside an old t-shirt *also duct-taped*. Hyesung then did a perfect drop-
kick and sent the parcel flying into his personal trashcan. He smiled and bowed to the wastebasket.
"Thank you, but I don't think I'll be needing your services anymore. Goodnight." Hyesung said cheerfully to the trashcan.
Day Four:

Hyesung is putting up a wonderfully brave fight against his cravings...

"DONGWAN! DONGWAN!"
*BANG BANG BANG*
Dongwan fell out of bed from the rude awakening, whacking his head on the floor.
"Ow...what the @*%!! $#&!* stupid #*&$..."
"DONGWAAAN!!"
"Christ, I'm coming already..." Dongwan foggily opened his bedroom door and had scarcely a chance to see straight before he was slammed to the ground.
"AACK!"
"GIVE...ME...YOUR...*COUGH* *COUGH* *HACK*..."
"H-Hyesung?! What the hell happened to you?!" Dongwan gasped, staring at Hyesung's puffy eyes and disheveled hair.
"GIVE...ME...YOUR...SOUL..." Hyesung droned, zombie-like. Dongwan briefly weighed his survival options. He was stronger and beefier, but Hyesung was a
Tae Kwon Do black belt and a good deal taller than him. On the other hand, Hyesung had been weakened from years of chain smoking...
"My soul?"
"NOT SOUL...GUM..." his undead moan was followed by a horrible coughing fit. Dongwan took advantage of this and pushed him easily off.
"Get a hold of yourself, man! and don't cough on me! that's sick! Gum, gum...oh, I think you mean this stuff..." He looked around on a bookshelf for the little
aluminum blister pack of Nicorette and tossed it on the floor. Hyesung's eyes bulged and he pounced like a tiger on the helpless pack of chewing gum.
"MINE!!" He screamed, shredding the foil bubbles with his nails and teeth. He shoved six little white gum tablets into his mouth at once, furiously growling as
he devoured them.
"Oh nicotine...sweet nicotine..." Hyesung moaned, chewing the gum as if he were making love to it.
"Are you ok now?" Dongwan asked, eyeing a nearby baseball bat in case Hyesung felt like attacking him again.
Hyesung looked around, confused and lost.
"What...what am I doing here? and why do I have all this gum in my mouth?"
Dongwan helped him to his feet.
"Don't think about it too much. Go back to sleep. Here, take the whole damn box with you..." He put the box of gum into Hyesung's hand and pushed him out
the door.
Hyesung looked around the hallway in the dark, shrugging at what he guessed must have been a random sleepwalking encounter. He padded back to his room
in bare feet, munching on the gum.

A few hours later, it was morning. The usual morning meeting happened in the living room, Shinhwa looking hungry and cigarette-starved while Harumi
looked spunky and energized.
"Ok guys, today is the fourth day. Do you all know what that means?" She began, smiling cutely at their groans of recognition.
"We don't get three a day anymore..." JunJin sighed.
"You got it! Starting now, you'll all be limited to two cigarettes a day for the next five days." Everyone looked as if they'd been slapped across the face, except
Dongwan and now Hyesung, who nervously chomped on a fresh Nicorette tab.
"Anything else to announce to us, before we start our day and you somehow find a way to ruin it?" Minwoo asked, gnawing on his finger.
Harumi scanned her clipboard. "Oh yes! first, I'd like to give Hyesung this nice lollipop for being such a good sport and quitting first--" She reached into her
bag and handed him a Green Apple Chupa Chups *wonder if they have those in Korea*. He took it from her as if it were a knife with which to stab himself.
"I need a stiff drink to go with this." He said under his breath. "I mean, uh, thanks Harumi."
She beamed. "I'm so proud of you. Now boys, one last thing...I have a new friend I'd like you to meet. Oh Aarthi, could you come in here?" She called to the
next room.

An astonishingly beautiful Indian woman in a dark business suit and Ray-Ban sunglasses walked into the living room.
Shinhwa: *GASP*
"Hello Shinhwa." She said, with a professional smile.
"Guys, this is Aarthi. She works for a privately-owned security firm in Tokyo. I've hired her to watch you all carefully and make sure that you haven't broken
your pledges. Aarthi-san, would you care to give a demonstration?"
"I'll need a volunteer." She said. Minwoo, Andy, Eric and JunJin eagerly raised their hands.
"ME! ME! PICK ME!! MEMEME!!"
"NO ME!! DON'T PICK HIM!! PICK MEEEEEE!!"
"YO WASSUP HOMEGIRL? YOU KNOW I'M YO NUMBA ONE HERRRE!"
"I HAD MY HAND RAISED FIRST!! THAT WAS SO ME!"

Aarthi whispered something to Harumi, who nodded and whispered something back. She looked back at Shinhwa.

"Eric. Come here, please." She said, motioning to him. Eric C-walked over to Aarthi, giving the other guys an "I'm da man" smile over his shoulder.
"Girl...you lookin' FAAAINE today...wussup wussup?"
Quicker than the speed of light, Aarthi pulled a stun gun from the pocket of her suit jacket and fired it into Eric's arm, mildly electrocuting him.
*BZZZT!*
"OW! WHATCHU DO DAT FO??!!" Eric's mouth dropped open and he clutched his arm in pain, looking woundedly at Aarthi and Harumi while the other guys
pointed and laughed at him.
"BWAAA-HA-HA!!"
Harumi nodded with grim approval.
"So now you see what will happen if Aarthi catches any of you smoking more than two cigarettes a day. She will be staying here for the next three days--"
"But longer if the situation calls." Aarthi added. "And don't forget that my stun gun is ALWAYS recharging."
Minwoo raised his hand politely.
"Um, hey Harumi...you think Aarthi and me can work out a deal like the one you and I got--"
*BZZZT BZZZT!!*
"OWWWWW!!!"
"This really hurts me more than it hurts you..." Harumi sniffled into a handkerchief.
Day Five: more fun with the stun gun

To show Shinhwa how much smoking can affect their careers as well as their health, I went with them to the recording studio. Despite their awful habits they
sure have talent, not like you didn't know that already!

"So, have we all been good boys and stuck to your two-smokes-a-day rule?" Harumi drilled sweetly from the back of the van as they went to the recording
studio. As usual, she got six different answers at once.
JunJin: "Yes, mother"
Hyesung: "NEED! GUM! NOW!"
Minwoo: "You owe me at least 20 minutes of boobietime for this. Hmmph."
Andy: "Yeah, it's been hard but I'm pulling through."
Dongwan: :D
Eric: "I've already had my two today, I dunno how I'm gonna--*BZZT*--OWW!"

Harumi took her usual notes as she listened to their responses. Aarthi sat next to her, stun gun at the ready. Eric rubbed his arm, glaring at the both of them.
"grumblegrumblebitchgrumblegrumble--"
*BZZZZT*
"AUGGHH!! WHO GAVE THIS CRAZY WOMAN A WEAPON?!"

"You should be nicer to someone who's investing so much time and energy into your health." Harumi sniffed, watching Eric get electrocuted with great joy.
"You're writing for your teen pop magazine. You don't give a flying crap about OUR health!" JunJin piped up from the front, safely out of range from the stun
gun.
Harumi's eyes welled with tears.
"How could you...how could you SAY that? After all we've been through together? You've really hurt me deep down inside..." She let out a squeaky sob and
buried her face in her hands.
JunJin's face fell. "I uh, I didn't mean to sound so harsh there...look, I didn't...aw...Harumi...I..." He reached back to pat her on the knee--
*BZZT*
"HOLY MOTHER OF GOD, THAT HURTS!!"

Many more fun turns with the electric shock gun followed on the way to the studio. Running inside to get away from evil women wielding torturous devices,
the guys met with their producers and got to work doing some touch-ups on a couple of new songs. While that was going on, Harumi decided to call up her
SODAPOP offices and let her boss know how everything was going.
"Harumi, everyone is so excited about the outcome of this story! We're all really hoping that--*COUGH**COUGH*--the band can *WET HACKING
COUGH*--make it through and quit smoking for good *pause to light next cigarette from previous cigarette*. It'll generate huge good publicity for the
magazine--*HACK*--."
"Thank you, sir, for your confidence in me." Harumi said somewhat defeatedly, trying to hide it under her usual peppy guise. "I've gotten one guy off smoking,
at least for now...but I only have 10 more days to get everyone else out of the habit."
"We have *pause to light new cigarette* all the faith in you."
"Thank you for your encouragement. I should go now and see how they're doing. Sayonara." She hung up and went back to the studio, where Minwoo was not
looking very pleased with something.
"Whaddya mean I didn't sing that right!? I WROTE the damn song! Of course I can sing it note for note!"
"Minwoo, we're sorry, but you're going to try to hit that high note again." A producer said from behind a glass panel. Minwoo looked ready to kill someone but
cleared his throat and tried to sing again.
"And you left me with the me-eh-eh-eh-mo-ohooooooh...reEEEEEEEEEsss..." His voice cracked four times during the line, and could barely finish the word
"memories" before gasping desperately for breath and nearly collapsing over the microphone. He was furious.
"Minwoo we're sorry, but I think we're going to have to use Dongwan for this part..." A recording engineer suggested. Dongwan looked up from his magazine.
"Someone need a throat not ruined from tar?" :D
Minwoo was furious, and kicked over his podium that held his music.
"Fuck this shit. I QUIT!"
Harumi jumped to her feet, her eyes shining.
"You've quit smoking!?"
"FUCK NO! I'M QUITTING SHINWHA!" And he stormed out of the room, having quite a presence for a man of his short stature. Harumi followed him,
frantically waving her arms and yelling something unintelligible. The rest of Shinhwa looked at each other and shrugged.
"I guess she doesn't know that he does this every day." Hyesung said.

"MINWOO! WAIT!" she yelled, cornering him after a brisk chase. "DON'T LEAVE THE GROUP!! PLEASE!! I'll do anything just as long as you stay!"
Minwoo stopped in his tracks and turned around.
"ANYthing?" *wicked smile*
Harumi looked at the ground.
"Anything."

*15 minutes later*

"I have officially decided to come back to the group!" Minwoo announced, bursting back into the room. Everyone else hardly looked his way and continued to
eat/drink/gossip/roughhouse.
"Thank god, I was about to perform sexual favors on you myself, so frantic with worry." JunJin muttered sarcastically. "By the way, your shirt is inside out."
"It is? Oh." Minwoo flipped his t-shirt off and put it back on right.
Day Six

Another member has come back from the dark side! what joy! I have confidence that through this new technique, he will have the power to remain cigarette-
free like Hyesung and Dongwan and all of the other "Warriors Of Abstinence" fighting the evil tobacco industry. Keep up the good fight, boys!

"What the...huh?" Eric said to himself out loud, looking around with confusion.
"She's not here." Hyesung stated the perfectly obvious, looking around the empty living room as if he expected Harumi to pop up from under a couch cushion.
Minwoo, Andy and JunJin were trying to keep the giant smiles of desperate hope off their faces without much luck. Dongwan just yawned and stretched.
"I say we go back to bed." He offered.
"I agree with that. Aarthi's gettin' lonely in my big bed--"
"MINWOO!? YOU DIDN'T--" Everyone in Shinhwa woke up and looked at him, eyes huge and jaws on the ground.
"--Guys, I was kidding...sheesh... " Minwoo said, putting up his hands in defense. He was pummeled by 10 fists at once.

Harumi walked into the living room, flanked by Aarthi on one side and a new well-dressed professional woman on the other.
Shinhwa stopped immediately. They looked terrified, gawking.
"You aren't carrying a stun gun...ARE you?" JunJin asked very suspiciously.
The young woman looked a bit confused. "I'm sorry, come again?"
"Thanks to Princess Megavolt over here--" Hyesung gestured at Aarthi, who gave an evilly sexy smile--"We've been taught to fear any attractive, professionally
dressed women that may be associating with Harumi."
"That's enough, Hyesung!" Harumi said, motioning for Aarthi to zap him--BZZT!. "Today I'm going to try a new method to help the remaining four of you quit.
This is an internationally known psychotherapist, Dr. Mai Vang.

Dr. Vang smiled graciously.

"I will be applying hypnotism on you in hopes to make your subconscious actively resistive to the bi-level addiction. You may experience posthypnotic
amnesia." She said, holding up a notepad and pen to demonstrate that she would be observing.
Shinhwa: O_o
"Say that again...in words we UNDERSTAND." Minwoo said very slowly.
"She's gonna put you under mind control to quit smoking." Andy translated.
Shinhwa *minus Andy*: Oh.
"I'm afraid we don't have time for full assessments on all of you, so I'll just be doing it to the four members that are still smoking. Which one of you would like
to go first?" She smiled very harmlessly and pointed to a couch.
"I dunno man...I've already fallen for that demonstration trick once...and thanks to that I lost all feeling in my left hand." Eric said, stepping back and pushing
Andy forward.
"HEY!" he yelled. "Don't get me into this!"
"Andy, would you like to have a seat?" Dr. Vang said sweetly, patting the couch. He looked very nervous but walked over anyway and sat down. The other
Shinhwa members, Harumi and Aarthi sat on couches and chairs nearby, waiting to see what would happen.
"Ok, now. I want you to close your eyes, lay back and count to thirty five in your mind, and when you've reached thirty five you're going to fall into a deep,
deep sleep. When I snap my fingers, you will still be asleep but you will be able to talk to me. Ok? Go."
Andy lay very still as Dr. Vang looked at her watch for thirty five seconds.
"Hey, make him cluck like a chicken!" JunJin suggested with a laugh, before a giggling Dongwan smacked him.
"Shh...heehee..."

Dr. Vang snapped her fingers. Andy opened his eyes but did not say a word. He seemed very mellow and relaxed.
"Andy, can you hear me?" She asked.
He nodded. "Yup."
"Where are you right now?"
"I'm in second grade. I'm hiding from this girl that keeps trying to kiss me at recess." He replied, making a face. "Girls are ICKY!"
"So that's his problem..." Minwoo snorted, prompting Aarthi to give him a threatening look. He shut up within seconds.
"Andy, can you go to another time?"
His face went blank. "Yes, I can do that."
"Good. When I snap my fingers, go to that place."
*snap*
"Ok, now where are you?"
"I--I'm in a place with lots of metal, and computers. I'm laying on a cold metal table. I'm not wearing any pants."
Shinhwa, Harumi, Aarthi, Dr. Vang: O_O;;;;;;;
"And, how old are you?" Dr. Vang said.
"Nineteen." He looked very frightened. "They're teleporting back into the room. Oh no--"
"They? Who are they, Andy?" She pressed.
"The Xaneoliathians. An enlightened race of extraterrestrials."
Everyone exchanged very nervous glances.
"Alright Andy, that's enough for you today. When I snap my fingers twice, you wil come out of your trance and feel refreshed as if you have woken up from a
deep, long sleep. You will remember nothing from this session."
Dr. Vang snapped her fingers twice. Andy blinked.
"So, are we starting this hypnotism thing anytime soon?" He asked, completely unaware of what happened.
Dr. Vang shook her head. "You can go sit with everyone else, Andy. Who's turn is it next?"

Andy looked confused, but got up and walked to the other side of the room. Eric gave him a very strange look when he sat down next to him.

Minwoo shrugged nonchalantly. "Guess I'll go." He swaggered to the couch and stretched his buff little body out. "Hey there, pretty lady. There's room for two
on this thing ;)"
Dr. Vang hid a smile behind her notepad. "Just lay back and close your eyes..." She repeated the ritual that she had gone through with Andy until Minwoo also
lay calm and quiet with his hands folded in his lap, waiting for her to speak.
"Where are you right now?"
A slow, lazy smile spread across Minwoo's face.
"My bedroom, I just got laid. Heh heh. My first time."
Dr. Vang wrote fast notes for a few minutes, then asked "Are you smoking a cigarette?"
He nodded.
"And what makes you think you need a cigarette, Minwoo?"
The grin faded slightly.
"I dunno, seemed like the manly thing to do I guess."
"Yes. Why don't you put that cigarette out?"
A moment of quiet.
Minwoo said "OK. I did."
"Good job. Now when I snap my fingers, I want you to take that feeling of pleasure that you get from sex and hold on to it--*snap*--you got that?"
"Awww yeaaah!" Minwoo giggled, smiling big again.
"CAN I GO NEXT!?" JunJin called enthusiastically.
Harumi shifted, uncomfortable. She'd better know what she's doing...
Dr. Vang continued. "When I snap my fingers again, I want you to replace the urge to smoke you feel with that moment of pleasure. You will then open your
eyes and return back to consciousness."

She snapped her fingers and Minwoo awoke with a jolt, looking around as if he had no idea who anyone was. Dr. Vang reached for an unlit cigarette from an
open carton on the center coffee table and offered him one. He almost took it from her, but instead he suddenly withdrew his hand and rolled his head back over
his shoulders, with his eyes closed and a lusty smile lifting the corners of his mouth.
"Mmm...oh baby..."
Shinhwa, Harumi, Aarthi *again*: O_O;;;;;;;;;;
He then went back to normal and said "Nah, no thanks. I've had enough for today."
The other Shinhwa members looked at each other in total shock.
"No way..."

Dr. Vang patted Minwoo on the head and stood up. He watched her with love struck eyes.
"That's all the time we have for today, I'm afraid our session ran a bit late. I believe that Minwoo has been cured of his tobacco addiction." She announced, with
a big smile.
"It was that easy?" JunJin asked, not believing this at all.
"Well," Dr. Vang admitted, "You might have to watch him for a few days. Make sure he doesn't get too close to anyone that might become, uhm...pregnant. If
you know what I mean ^^;;;;;;"
Everyone nodded slowly.
"Does the door to my room have a lock?" Harumi asked.
"No, but I have a baseball bat that I'd be happy to loan you just in case." Dongwan replied.
Day Seven
Today we saw Aarthi off, and while I will miss both her company and the wonderful stun gun, I believe it is for the best because she has done her job well (Not
to mention that Eric has threatened to sue me for assault with a deadly weapon if she stays any longer! ^^;;).

I'm also happy to report that JunJin is spreading the word on the terrible risks of smoking...

"Really now...you didn't ALL have to come out to say goodbye..." Aarthi said as she stood in in the open door with a slim suitcase in her hand.
"Oh no, it's all OUR pleasure." Eric insisted, smiling happily. The other members of Shinhwa nodded with great enthusiasm.
"You're SURE we can't extend your contract?" Harumi asked, trying to keep the pleading tone out of her voice. Aarthi shook her head, mysterious as usual
behind her sunglasses.
"It was an...experience, getting to know you all. I wish the remaining three of you the best of luck with trying to quit." She said with a cool smile, and giving a
curt bow she walked from the house to the sleek black car that was waiting to drive her away.

It was a reasonably quiet day in their house. Harumi sat in her usual chair in the living room reading a book called World Domination Through Journalism. Eric
and Hyesung lay sprawled on the floor, moaning with hunger.

"I'm so...miserable..."
"GOD I need a smoke..."
"...help..."
"I'm...dying..."
"Go to the light, Hyung...go towards the light..."

"AHHH!!! GUESS WHAT! GUESS WHAT!!" JunJin's voice rang out through every corner of the house. He ran from room to room, waving his mobile phone
around triumphantly. He stopped at the foot of the stairs and yelled out triumphantly to the living room, "SHE'S BACK FROM SINGAPORE!! SHE WANTS
TO SEE ME TONIGHT! TONIGHT! AAAHH!!"
At the word "She", all puzzlement on the guys' faces vanished and they went back to what they had been doing before.
Harumi was quite lost.
"He's talking about MC. She's an actress that he's madly in love with." Hyesung explained from his place on the floor.
"He's been trying to get into her pants for the last six months." Eric added with a snort.
"She's the most wonderful woman in the WORLD!" JunJin gushed, twirling around with his phone clutched to his chest. Eric sat up.
"Jin, why is it that the happier you are, the gayer you act?"
"I'm not gay! I'm ECSTATIC! Oh gosh...what will I wear?!" He pranced off to his room upstairs with a giant smile plastered across his face.
"That's why it's taken six months?" Harumi asked.
"You got it...ughhh...I need a smoke..." They both collapsed to the floor again in a writhing heap.

...Several Hours Later...

"You look really great tonight. " JunJin repeated for the fourth time in the last hour, gawking at the beautiful woman that sat across from him.
"Thank you...again." MC replied, with the same smile that she had given him the first four times. Is he going to do anything but stare at me all night and say the
same sentance over and over again? She wondered to herself.

Trying to change the subject, she asked "So, um...aren't you hungry? You haven't touched your dinner."
JunJin looked down and seemed surprised to see that there was food on his plate.
"Oh, right! haha, of course. I'm sorry, it's just that you are so beautiful that I can't think of anything else. In fact, I don't even know why I ordered food--I just
want to look at you forever. " He said adoringly, with a big smile.
"Heh, that's very...sweet of you." MC said, very disturbed by what he had just said. A waiter came and took their half-eaten and untouched plates away.
"Would you be interested in dessert?" he asked.
"None for me, thanks, I've already earned my extra hour in the gym tomorrow." She joked.
JunJin was still staring at her, eyes shining.
"Um, JunJin?"
"Yes, my fabulous angel? "
"Heh ^^;;;. Do you want to order dessert?"
"If you want it...anything you want." He murmured. MC shook her head at the waiter and he walked off.
She cleared her throat.
"So..."
"You look really great tonight."

...several minutes of love struck/uncomfortable silence later...

MC reached into her purse and pulled out a cigarette. Lighting it from the candle that sat on the table, she didn't notice that JunJin had suddenly snapped to life
until she put it to her lips. Completely without realizing what he was doing, JunJin pulled the cigarette out of her fingers and stubbed it into a nearby ashtray.
"What--what did you do that for!" She asked, shocked. JunJin looked just as bewildered as she did.
"I don't know why I did that!" He said.
"I thought you were a smoker too." She said, wondering what would happen if she tried to smoke another one.
"I am...well, I was...I'm uh, I'm trying to quit." He stuttered. "I'm really sorry about that, I am...you can smoke around me, it's ok. Do anything you want around
me, I don't care! Just as long as I get to look at you!"

Oh great. He had gone back to his babbling about how beautiful she was. Talk like that drove MC crazy, and not in a good way. But there was something that
couldn't be denied in the way that he had taken the cigarette out from between her lips like that. She leaned across the table and softly touched JunJin's hand
with her fingertips. He jumped a foot in the air.
"Do you want to come back to my place?" She asked quietly, with a meaningful little smile. JunJin was positive that he hadn't heard her right, so he replied with
an equally meaningful "HUH?".
"What you just did, with the cigarette and the ashtray...that was SO sexy." She purred. "So ya wanna come home with me or not?"
JunJin was elated beyond all clear words at this point. His only reaction was to nod eagerly with an ear-to-ear grin.

...several more minutes of heated tension later, at MC's apartment...

I'm getting some action tonight...la la la la la la... JunJin sang over and over in his head happily. He watched her dim the lights and put on mood music, then she
moved her graceful body next to him on the soft leather couch and snuggled close against his very constricted chest.
"Did I mention yet how beautiful you--mmph--"
What would have been his 30th repetition of that phrase tonight was interrupted by MC leaping on him and smothering his babbling mouth with a long kiss. It
would have been a much longer, hotter kiss if Jin hadn't reacted with horrified surprise, struggled for a moment and then pushed her off of him.
"AAACK!"
MC was furious.
"Why on earth did you do that? I thought you wanted me to kiss you!"
"Oh my god...It IS like licking an ashtray!" He cried out, wiping off his mouth with wide-eyed disgust.
"WHAT?!"
"MC I'm really sorry, but I don't think that I can do this..." JunJin stood up, grabbing his jacket.
She was not a woman used to being rejected.
"What the hell is wrong with you? Ten minutes ago you were drowning in your own drool over me!"
"I don't know what's wrong with me, I really don't. It's nothing personal, honestly, I think you're really nice and everything but I can't--"
"You can't what, do me? because I SMOKE? You hypocrite!" She yelled, turning off the mood music and throwing the lights back on.
"I can't explain it. I need to go..." He was looking very confused himself.
"Well FINE, just go then. See if I care. You were probably LOUSY in bed anyway! Do you know what smoking leads to? IMPOTENCE!!!" And with that, she
opened the door for JunJin and slammed it hard behind him.

...several confusion/rage-filled minutes later, back at Shinhwa's house...

*SLAM*
"HARUMIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!"
JunJin may have been a thin man, but when he threw open the front door hard enough to almost break it, he seemed to take up every centimeter of space inside
the doorway.
Not seeing her within the first floor, he took the stairs one at a time.
CLOMP. CLOMP. CLOMP. CLOMP. CLOMP.
"HARUMIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!"
Not sane enough at the moment to care about privacy, he burst through her bedroom door and found her sitting complacently at her desk with a laptop and
several notebooks, working on her story for the magazine.
"Oh, hi JunJin! back from your date already?" She said cheerfully, not noticing the veins that were popping out from his forehead.
"YOU...RUINED...MY...LIFE..." He roared, one word at a time, and took a menacing step towards her. Her smile vanished and was replaced by a very uneasy
look, as the lightning in his eyes suggested that he wanted blood.
"Uh, JunJin, are you feeling ok? JunJin? JUNJIN?"

Day Eight (it's after midnight, therefore a new day must start...)

"JunJin, you seem a little upset about something..."

Harumi stood up from her chair and backed away slowly as the fuming JunJin stomped across the room with homicide on his mind.
"EVIL WOMAN, YOU PLOTTED THIS FROM THE BEGINNING!" He roared, reaching out to grab her tiny figure. Harumi screamed.
"EEEK! HELP! SOMEBODY!"
He half-tackled Harumi and tried to drag her, struggling and yelling, out of the room down the hall. He wasn't sure what he was going to do with her, but it
would be worth the trouble. Oh yes. He would have his revenge for her ruining what would have been the best night of his life.
"HELLLLP!!" She yelled out as she tried to grab something to smash over his head.
Suddenly, she was wrenched from JunJin's vise-like grip and thrown down to the floor as something small jumped on his back and managed to pin him against
a wall. It took Harumi a few blurry seconds to realize...
"MINWOO?!"
"GARHAAHRAA MAGGENFEGGIN YASHABASHA HASHAMASHA..." JunJin's swearing had pooled into unrecognizable gibberish as Minwoo let him
go, so that he could punch him across the face and knock him semi-conscious.
*WHAM!*
He wobbled for a minute, then collapsed to his knees on the carpet next to Harumi.
"Oww...fuggin'...hate you..."
Harumi looked around and saw Eric and Dongwan standing in a nearby doorway, shaking their heads as if they knew this was going to happen.
"Come on, you big baby..." They each took one of JunJin's arms and dragged him off to his bedroom. "Sorry about that, Harumi." Eric apologized, being
unusually sincere. She nodded, breathless. Minwoo offered to help her up, so she took his hand and stood up.
"Minwoo...thank you. You saved me." She said. Minwoo smiled modestly.
"Ah, it was really nothin'. I did what I had to do. Don't worry about Jin, he's just pissed now but it will all be better in the morning."
Silence for a minute.
"I guess I owe you one now." Harumi said with a timid blush.

Minwoo grinned his usual lecherous grin and grabbed her wrist.

"What are you--?"

"--I'm so glad you said that! I've already got something in mind." He said happily.
"Minwoo--AACK!"
He jogged back into her room, pulling a very loudly protesting Harumi along with him.
"I wanna sleep here tonight!"
"You WHAT?"
He jumped right into the middle of her bed and grabbed a pillow. Snuggling under the sheets, he patted the untouched opposite side.
"Come on, it's bedtime!"
"I'm not sleeping with you!" She argued, not believing that this was actually happening. "If you want my bed, I'll go sleep on the couch downstairs..."
"Nope! ain't gonna work! Need two people!" :D
"I--I won't do it!"
Minwoo's lip quivered as he unleashed his secret weapon: THE ULTIMATE PUPPY FACE.
:(
"...but you said..."
"I know what I said, but--" Her resolve was already weakening.
Minwoo increased his puppy face power by 500%.
:( :( :( :( :(
"Well...I-I guess...if it's only for one night...and if no one finds out..."
She gave up and very very nervously went over to the other side of the bed, where she lay as stiff as a mummy on top of the covers. Minwoo made a happy
noise and threw his arms around her waist, spooning his legs around her and wrapping a blanket over her.
"Ahhh...Harumi, could you turn the light off? I can't unless it's dark..." He asked, his voice muffled against her shirt.
Harumi blinked. "Uhm, yeah." Without moving the rest of her body, she stretched out her arm and flipped the switch on her desk light.
"That's better...mmm you smell so nice and girly."
Harumi must have waited for fifteen minutes in the dark before she realized that Minwoo wasn't planning to do anything but cuddle and sleep. ACTUALLY
sleep. Which she supposed wasn't so bad...
"Goodnight, Minbong." She whispered, relaxing a bit.
Minwoo half-snored in response.

...

She woke up in the morning to find his face anchored cozily in her chest, sleeping like a baby. Of course her first reaction was panic, then she remembered--
another one of their "deals".
"Hey...Minwoo." She muttered, trying to disentangle him from her. His eyelids fluttered open and he looked around.
"Ohayo gozaimasu...Harumi-chan" he said with a naughty smile.
"I never knew you spoke Japanese. Ohayo to you too. Now get up and out, I need to start my day." She said nervously, half-leaping out of bed and turning her
back to him.
He stretched out with a loud yawn, putting his hands behind his head and winking at Harumi.
"So early? Come back, it's nice and warm in this bed."

Harumi's hair prickled but she turned around with a sweet smile on her face, clutching a pillow to her chest.
"Well, ok...anywhere with you is nice and warm, Oppa...heehee." She giggled innocently.
Minwoo raised his eyebrows. "You're pretty cute when you want to be--OOF!"
*WHACK!* Harumi brought her pillow down hard on Minwoo's face.
"GET OUT OF MY ROOM! NOW!"
"Sheesh, ok ok...I've had worse morning-afters..." He mumbled, slipping out of her bed and walking woundedly out the door.

...

It was back to her familiar spot in the living room for the routine morning anti-tobacco meeting, but now she wondered if it would be different thanks to the
incident between herself and JunJin last night.
What the heck was his problem, anyway--I didn't have anything to do with his date! she said to herself.
Yet at a few minutes past eight...
All six of them came trooping in. Still cranky, still complaining about their lack of cigarettes and nicotine cravings, but they were all there. JunJin was glaring
at every object in the room, but he still sat down and waited for her to start the meeting.

"Well, um, how is everyone?" She asked, avoiding JunJin's icy stare.
"Last night was so disappointing. We had our ears pressed to the wall for an hour but you and Minwoo never did the nasty so it was all a waste..." Dongwan
said shamelessly.
"They could have been doing it! just quietly!" Andy protested.
"Aw come on, you know that Minwoo's never quiet about anything, ESPECIALLY when it comes to--." Hyesung said.
"I stayed out of the whole damn thing, thank god." Eric added to reassure Harumi. She was staring at her clipboard, turning several shades of pink at once.

JunJin poked Hyesung in the shoulder and said something low and slurred behind his hand. Hyesung nodded.
"JunJin says that he's sorry for attacking you last night." He explained. JunJin poked him again and grumbled some more.
"He says that thanks to your obsessive, inhumane, brainwashing mind-control experiment techniques, he was unable to make sweet love to MC after finding
out that she smoked."
Harumi was stunned beyond words. She lifted her hand to her mouth and gasped.
"OH JUNJIN! I'M SO...PROUD OF YOU!!!"
She burst into tears of joy and threw herself into his lap.
"GROUP HUG! GROUP HUG! EVERYONE, HUG!"
Jin looked enraged/frightened/annoyed/touched all at once, but he gingerly patted Harumi on the back. Everyone reached forward and awkwardly did the same.
"She said HUG, dammit!" Minwoo snapped.
Eric, Hyesung, Andy and Dongwan followed his order and pulled themselves into a big huddle.
"Oh, you guys...you all make me so happy...even Eric." Harumi sniffled, crushed within the center of the hug. "There's no meeting today--go do whatever you
want--but remember: a cigarette is just fire at one end and a victim at the other."
---

A/N: yes, that is an actual anti-tobacco slogan. It was the lamest one I could find :)
Day Nine

Oh, we had SUCH a fun day today! We partied like it was 1999!

The boys met their morning meeting with a surreal mess in the living room. Eric said his most predictable and overused line:
"What the f-ck..."

There were brown feathers all over the floor and scattered across the furniture. Three paper plates of sliced lunch meat were on the coffee table.
Harumi was wearing a turkey costume. She smiled adorably from her headdress, which had a big opening for her face with a beak and eyes sitting on top of her
head. The rest of the turkey suit was covered in white and brown feathers. She looked like an escapee from Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Or perhaps an
escapee from a mental institution.

"SURPRISE! HAPPY COLD TURKEY DAY!" She cheered, flapping her little feathery wings and stomping her bird-feet slippers in a strange dance.

Shinhwa: O.o;;;;;;;;;;; what the hell...

"IT'S COLD TURKEY DAY! YAY YAY YAY!"

"Perhaps on your planet, it is..." Dongwan whispered.
JunJin could hardly get a sentence out. "Wh-wh-what-what is-what is she--"

She pointed happily to the cold cuts on the table.

"See? it's cold turkey! come on guys, it's a party!"

"A PARTY?! FOR WHAT!?" Hyesung yelled.
Harumi mock-sighed and put her wings on her hips.
"Oh you silly guys...don't you know? the phrase 'cold turkey' means that you've quit something for good! and since I KNOW that you guys can make it through
all this and not go back to smoking, I threw you a cold turkey party! so LET'S GET DOWN WITH OUR BAD SELVES!" She resumed her little hopping bird
dance.

Everyone turned and looked at Minwoo quizzically.

"You're telling me that you actually DESIRE this woman?" JunJin asked him without a hint of sarcasm in his voice. Minwoo looked extremely embarrassed and
shrugged his shoulders, looking at the ground.
"Well...she's kinda hot when she's not acting insane..." He muttered.
"GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE! DO THE TURKEY! OOOH OOOH!" She yelled out to them encouragingly, boogying down to some strange music that
apparently only she could hear.

"It was kinda nice of her to do this." Andy said quietly. "We should just go along with it, I don't want to hurt her feelings."
"Yeah...come on...we've done worse on national television, right?" Hyesung suggested weakly. "Only for a few minutes."
Dongwan, Jin, Eric and Minwoo stubbornly shook their heads NO.
"Well fine then! just don't look at us when she starts crying! Hmmph!" Hyesung and Andy turned to Harumi, forcing big smiles across their faces.
"Oh guyyyys, look what I have for youuuu!" She sang out, reaching to the chair behind her and picking up a handful of fake beaks for them to wear on their
faces. The two guys looked at each other, sighed unhappily and put them on. The beaks covered both their noses and mouths, which was good because that way
no one could blackmail them with photographs.
The other guys saw this and fell on the ground laughing.

"DANCE! DANCE! WEEHEE, DO THE TURKEY DANCE!" Harumi turned on the stereo and started blasting rave techno music. She started breakdancing--
yes that's correct, she was a breakdancing turkey.

"Do we haaave to do this..." Andy whined as he unenthusiastically put his hands up in the air and waved 'em around like he just didn't care.
"Yes Andy...yes, we do..." Hyesung answered. He did the twist, looking miserable.

The remaining four guys still stood at the far end of the living room, watching her do The Robot in her turkey costume and laughing at everyone.
"You know, that does look sorta fun..." Jin said at last. Dongwan and Eric rolled their eyes.
"Jin, you're such an attention whore! you'd do anything if it gets you applause!" Eric said. JunJin pouted.
"I'm not an attention whore, I'm a goofball! It says so in all of my biographies."
"Well, I like attention too!" Minwoo piped up. "Let's go, JunJin!"
JunJin grinned. "OK!"

So JunJin and Minwoo put their beaks on and joined the party. Harumi beamed like a nuclear power plant.
"See what fun we can have without smoking?" She called out triumphantly.
You'd have to be smoking something much stronger than tobacco to be enjoying this... Hyesung thought to himself. Meanwhile, Minwoo was dancing on the
table and having a great time while JunJin started a couch-cushion fight with Andy.

Dongwan and Eric looked at each other, frowning.

"Well, now what? Now we're the loners!" Dongwan said.
"I guess we have to accept defeat and go over there..." sighed Eric.
*BAM!* Eric got hit in the head with a pillow. Brown turkey feathers floated in the air as if someone had shot a flock of birds out of the sky.
"WHY YOU LITTLE--" He roared, and joined the fight. Dongwan strapped on a beak and did the Macarena with Hyesung and Harumi.

No one except Harumi ever admitted that they had fun that morning, but secretly they all enjoyed it immensely.

Day Ten

Ah, What glamorous lives celebrities lead! I went with Shinhwa to the Korean Teen Choice Awards tonight and of course, they took the top honors. After that,
we went to a huge party and had a night to remember! It must be so great to have all of those adoring fans ^^;;. One special member of Shinhwa gets extra
applause from me, because he became the third guy to quit smoking under my guidance! hooray for him! ^^

He wore a button-down white shirt open to expose his collarbones, pressed gray slacks and soft, clean black socks on his feet. A very thin gold bracelet, gold
watch and simple gold band glinted among the tanned skin of his strong hands. His cheekbones caught the light in flattering ways and his brushed back hair had
just enough gel.
"Yes, Dongwan." He said to himself in the mirror with a cheeky smile that showed his square, white teeth. "Yes, you are a sexy, sexy man." He debated putting
a gold hoop in his ear, but decided that it would take the attention away from his new haircut *A/N: no more skunky for DW*. Pulling some new black leather
shoes out of a box and slipping them on his feet, he laced them up and tested their heaviness by strutting around his room for a minute.

*THUNK!* The loud noise against the outside wall of his room startled him.
"HAA-HAHA!" came some guys' laughter outside.
"Grr..." he opened his window and looked down at JunJin, Minwoo, Andy and Eric. Eric held a basketball in his hands, all of them smiling innocently up at
Dongwan.
"You guys need to get ready for the awards tonight!" He lectured them with a glare.
"What are you talking about?? we don't have to be there for six more hours!" Minwoo argued. "Come on and play with us!"
"We aren't children!" He slammed the window shut.
"PANSY!" Eric yelled up at him.
They resumed their basketball game.

...Six and a half hours later...

"Where's Dongwan?" JunJin asked, exercising his eyebrows with a small hand mirror.
"I dunno." Said Eric.
"I dunno." Said Minwoo.
"I dunno." Said Andy.
"He got dressed way earlier than us, he should be more than ready to go by now...DONGWAN!" Hyesung yelled up the stairs. "COME ON, WE'RE GONNA
BE LATE!"
"Yeah yeah, I'm coming! come on Harumi, you heard him." The other five guys looked at each other.
"Dongwan better not be sneakin' peeks at my boobies..." Minwoo growled. JunJin thwacked him on the back of his head.
"Is that ALL you ever think about? SHEESH!"
"I can't help it! She's got a nice rack!"
"ENOUGH!" JunJin put his hands over his ears.
Minwoo snickered. "Still bitter over MC? I bet she liked a big, hard smoke--"
"YOU SHUT UP!" Jin pounced on Minwoo and prepared to beat the snot out of him.
Minwoo struggled and stuck out his tongue, not afraid of JunJin at all.
"Behhh! CIGARETTE ENVY!"

Eric sighed and rubbed his temples. "Would you guys just quit it..."
Hyesung and Andy read magazines, completely ignoring the fight.

"AAAHHARUMI?" Minwoo suddenly yelled.

JunJin looked up, distracted. His fist was two inches away from Minwoo's face.

Dongwan stood at the foot of the stairs with a very shy Harumi standing behind him.
"Guys, this is my date to the awards." He said with a smile. He moved away from her and she tried to follow, but he held her by the wrist so that she stayed
there. Harumi looked very sophisticated and grownup in a sleek green party dress and tasteful makeup. Her loose hair fell below her shoulders, a change from
the pigtails and teenage fashions that they had seen her in every day. She was blushing like mad.

"Harumi's coming?" Andy and Hyesung asked at the same time, sounding confused.
"HARUMI'S COMING?" Eric asked, sounding terribly depressed.
Dongwan nodded happily. "Yep. It's a good way for her to make sure that you guys keep your promise about not smoking."
"Can't we get a break for one night??" Hyesung demanded.
Dongwan looked hurt. "Hyesung, I'm only looking out for your health! I love you man! I don't want you to get sick from cigarettes if you go back to 'em!"
Hyesung's lip trembled. "You--you really mean that?"
Dongwan nodded solemnly. "Of course."
"Oh, Dongwan...I love you too..." Hyesung tried to control his tears of emotion and only let one fall before giving a tremendous sniffle and looking away.

JunJin let go of Minwoo and sat up, rearranging his rumpled clothes back to normal. Minwoo did the same, noting to himself that almost getting beat up
actually made his hair look better.

...At the awards show...

"WOO! I'm so happy for you guys!" Harumi cheered as they walked triumphantly backstage after winning the award for Best Pop Group. The guys all looked
much more cheerful than they had in ages, thanks to either the award or good makeup.
"Thanks." Eric said, smiling. His smile suddenly changed to a look of frozen terror, much like the others behind him.
"GET OUT OF THE WAY!" JunJin yelled.
Harumi looked confused. "Huh?"
"STAMPEDE! TIDAL WAVE!"
Harumi looked behind her and saw every single girl group in Korea running full steam at Shinhwa. All of them squealing "OPPAAAA!!" in extremely high-
pitched girlish voices. Harumi stepped out of the way just in time to avoid being trampled under a mob of high heels.
"Oppa, you did so great out there!!" Panted Bomi as she reached them first, half-jumping into Dongwan's arms. Similar phrases rang out everywhere:
"OPPA! You're so cool!"
"You like, totally deserve that award!"
"I knew you'd win!"
"You look so cute tonight!"
"I wore this dress for YOU, oppa! teehee!"

Meanwhile in a corner, Harumi tried to blend in with the plants.

"Man, I love being famous :D." Minwoo said, with his arms around two giggling popstars. "So ya guys gonna come to my party tonight? :D" Eugene Kim from
SES asked with a flirty smile.
They looked at each other and shrugged.
"Sure, why not? :D"
"OH YAY!" Eugene did a little twirl. "See ya there--OH MY GOSH! IT'S YUNSUK! LET'S GET HIM!"
The herd of squealing girls suddenly flew across the backstage area to attack all of the other unfortunate gasoo men.

...At Eugene's Party...

Harumi couldn't have BEGGED for a better night. She knew it had been a good thing to hide that tape recorder in her evening bag--it was catching some of the
juiciest celebrity gossip in years. She already had enough material to start a new project after her no-smoking mission was accomplished. The pulsing music
and flashing rave lights made up the atmosphere of the most exclusive bash of the year, and thanks to Shinhwa she was there to take a part of it. She crept close
to a conversation that was going on between Bomi from MILK and Ayumi from Sugar.
"So like, I was in this orgy last week..." Bomi drawled.
"Oh my gosh! like, you were? so I was I! With Wonbin and Tony Ahn?"
"Oh my god, like, YEAH!"
"I was like, so drunk that night..."
"Girlfriend, so was I..."
"I guess it was a foursome then!"
"Heehee! I guess so!" They both burst into giggles.

"Aw nutbunnies!" Harumi cussed as she realized that her tape was running out and needed to be turned over. She didn't want to miss the rest of that
conversation for the world, but if she was going to get the whole story then she had to find someplace to change the cassette, quick.
She ducked into the club's empty bathroom and ran into a stall, closing the door behind her and frantically opening the recorder.

Had she not been so hasty, she would have realized that she had run into the men's room.

The bathroom door swung open and heavy, masculine footsteps stomped in. Harumi froze, and her confusion led to humiliated shock as she heard the
unmistakable sound of men using urinals. She gave a long sigh and hoped that they'd finish their business quickly so that she could get out of there without
anyone seeing.

But no, life was never that good to Harumi. After she winced at listening to them finish peeing and zip up, she watched two sets of dark shoes walk over to the
sinks. A little flicking sound was heard and after that, a sickening cloud of secondhand smoke nearly choked her to death.
"Ahhh dude...it feels so good to have a smoke again." She heard one of them say.
Harumi blinked hard. That sounded like...HYESUNG! HER Hyesung? Whom she was so proud of for being the first to quit smoking? It couldn't be! She tried
to remember what his shoes looked like but couldn't recall them. She wondered who the other guy was.
"Why do you let that chick manipulate you like that? Come on yo, be a man. Don't let her take away your right to smoke." The other one said. Harumi peered
through the crack of the door and saw that the one with the unrecognizable voice had his back turned to her, making it impossible for her to see him. Her eyes
welled up with hurt tears as she saw Hyesung, dragging deeply on a cigarette.
"Whatever, it's not that big of a deal to me. Let's get back to the party eh?" Hyesung and the other man walked past the stalls. Harumi sucked all of her breath in
as she saw Hyesung stop in front of her stall.
"Uh...what's with the girl shoes?" He asked his friend, as she looked down and realized that she had not pulled her feet out of sight. Sexy platform wedge shoes
would look out of place in a men's bathroom...
The other guy knocked on the door.
"You get lost, little girl? haha."
Harumi tried not to panic. She opened her mouth and said the first words that came to mind:
"It's only me...Harisu."
Hyesung and company stepped back a few feet.
"Oh, uh...sorry about that, Harisu."
"It's ok, uh...just leave me alone." Harumi tried to deepen her voice.
"Thought Harisu used the ladies' room..." Hyesung said as they shuffled out of the bathroom.

After a few minutes of making sure the coast was clear, Harumi opened the door to her stall and sadly crept out of the bathroom and back to the party. She
didn't care about gossip or fun or her job anymore. All she could think about was how Hyesung had betrayed her after all that she had done for him. Where had
she gone wrong?

Men...I hate ALL men...I need a drink She reasoned angrily to herself as she stomped to the bar with her head down.
"Gimme a shot of your best sake." She demanded to the bartender.
"Yes Ma'am."

...five shots later...

"Turkey...cold turkey gobble...hehe..." She babbled to herself, tipping a shot glass upside down and trying to suck the last tiny molecules of remaining liquor
from it.
The party was winding down--Shinhwa was still there, she hoped--but the main remaining partiers there were the drunken sluts and drunken old men. Someone
was wailing into a karaoke machine nearby--that sounded kind of fun. She wobbled off her bar stool and half-stomped with bleary eyes towards the sound of
someone attempting "Spice Up Your Life."
"BOOOO...You SUUUUCK!" Harumi yelled at the girl with the microphone. She climbed up on stage and tried to roughly push her out of the way.
"HEY!" yelled the other girl, who was actually Hyori. "DISH ISH MAAH SHONNG...OH MAN I'M SO FUCKING DRUNK!"
"Get off da stage...it's MAH TURRRN!" Harumi yelled back as Hyori shoved her away and held the microphone above her head. "YOU can't sing FER
CRAP!"
"IMMA KICK YOU ASS, HO!" Hyori took a weak swing at Harumi, totally missed and fell over on her butt. The few drunken men who were watching all of
this cheered wildly.
"Uh, shouldn't we do something about this?" Brian Joo asked Kyesang. The GOD frontman shook his head no.
"This is the most interesting thing I've seen all year, dude! what are you talking about!"
Harumi wrenched the mic from Hyori's fingers and tried to sing as another song came up. This one was Jang Nara's "Soak My Face With Tears".
Unfortunately before she could start, Fany from Fly To The Sky came up from the crowd and picked up Harumi, casually throwing her over his shoulder and
carrying her off stage as she half-struggled. The crowd burst into applause and Hyori was similarly carried off by someone else.
"Let me go...you LYING MAN!" Harumi slurred.
Fany looked around, located Andy who was standing nearby with his mouth on the floor *like the rest of Shinhwa*, and dropped her into his lap.
"Is she yours?" He asked. Harumi sat up, straddling him.
"Andy...baby...I owe you so much flash time..." She said in a low voice, running her fingers below the open collar of his shirt. Andy's eyes opened even wider,
and he started to stutter.
"Harumi--you're drunk!"
"Haha, YEAH she is..." note to self: drunken Harumi=hot slut Harumi! Minwoo thought, storing that bit of info away for later.
"Come on cutie pie...lemme make a man outta ya." Harumi laughed, standing up and attempting to pull a very very nervous Andy along with her.
"Um...I uh...okay...Minwoo?! HELP!!" He yelled over his shoulder, wishing that someone would stop her.
"This should be good...MAKE ME PROUD, ANDY-BOY!" Minwoo yelled back with a grin and a wink.
"Ooohdeargod..." He said out loud as she steered him into a private lounge area that had been long cleared out. She half-collapsed on a sofa. Andy was
rightfully terrified.
"Look, Harumi, it's alright, you don't have to flash me at all, that really was just a joke from the beginning, I was never serious about---oh my god--" His
blabbering was cut short as he watched her unhook her bra from behind. She smiled and pulled up a loose strap, extremely sexy in her drunken sluttiness.
"You're not gonna lie to me, are ya Andy? ya gonna make promises to me that yer not gonna keep? huh?" She said, pulling down the straps of her dress. Andy
slid away from her on the sofa with his hands half-covering his eyes.
"Harumi, please, really...I know you're drunk, I don't want you to do something you'll regret in the morning..." He unsuccessfully tried to push her dress back up
but she only took that as the wrong signal.
"NAUGHTY! you're just as bad as Minwoo! heeheehee!"
Andy bit his hand and whimpered. His cheeks and ears were the color of a pink highlighter pen.
"Come on, ya naughty boy..." Harumi pulled the other side of her dress down and held the soft fabric against her chest.
"WOMAN, PLEASE!" Andy screamed.
"I'LL DO ANYTHING YOU WANT!! I'LL GIVE UP SMOKING! JUST KEEP YOUR DAMN CLOTHES ON!"

Of course, everyone in the party heard that.

Shinhwa looked down and sighed.

"That's our Andy - -;;;." Minwoo said disappointedly.

That seemed to sober up Harumi real quick. She shook her head, dazed and confused.
"Did you really mean that?" She asked him quietly, pulling her dress back up. Andy nodded, his eyes still huge and his body still incredibly rigid.
"Good...now don't lie to me and break your promise, or I'll come into your room and rape you..." She mumbled, and threw up over the side of the couch before
passing out, again, in Andy's lap.
Day 11

Heed my words, loyal SODAPOP readers: ALCOHOL IS NO BETTER THAN TOBACCO!

Harumi's eyes slowly fluttered open, then closed tightly shut again as horrible, sadistic, bright-as-rage-sunlight pounded nails into her brain. She opened one
side of her lips and groaned from the back of her throat, rolling over and throwing her arm over her face as a shield.

Slowly, opening her eyes again and raising herself up on her elbows. She saw a mass of blurry shapes to her left and a solid blurry shape to her right. As she
adjusted more to the painful morning light, her thoughts became clearer and instead she saw crumpled bedcovers and a wall opposite her. She realized that she
was in her bed at Shinhwa's house, wearing her underwear from last night. How did she get back here?
owww...my head...she thought, rubbing her forehead and collapsing back on her pillow. Stop thinking...it only makes the hangover worse.
As if she NEEDED anything to make her horrible headache worse, a high-pitched whistling tune came cheerfully tripping out of her adjoining bathroom,
accompanied by the sound of running water. It sounded like one of those little cartoon Disney birds in Snow White.

Harumi was definitely not in the right mindset to be serenaded by a bluebird at this point.

"What's going on..." She said with a croaky voice as she tried to sort out the blurry details in her throbbing head. I'm in my underwear, I don't know how I got
into this bed, I got totally plastered last night and tried to molest Andy...at least I think it was Andy...

At what could not have been a better time, Dongwan poked his head into her room from the bathroom, wearing a dark blue robe around his freshly-showered
body and still whistling with a toothbrush in his mouth.

"Morning, sunshine!" He called out cheerfully, half-spraying white foamy slobber across the room.

All the pieces suddenly fell into place.

Harumi: *click* O_O

"OH MY GOD!" She screamed, holding her hand up to her mouth in horror.
"Eh?" Dongwan said.
"Dongwan...you CAD!"
"Eh?"
Harumi gnashed her teeth at him. "DON'T YOU ACT SO INNOCENT WITH ME! HOW DARE YOU TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME WHEN I WAS--ohhhh,
my HEAD!" She fell back down on the pillows, groaning with pain and trying to block all light away from her eyes again.
Dongwan: "Gimme a minute, I gotta go spit 'n rinse."

There was a "pthoo" and numerous gargling sounds. After that, the whistling started up again to drown out the running water noise. Harumi pulled the bed
sheets far up over her face and tried to block it all out.
How could I DO this? I'm a professional! I didn't even let Minwoo go all the way with me, but I got drunk and slept with DONGWAN?! That's it...my career is
over...
"Hey, Harumi." Dongwan sat down on the edge of her bed and patted her shoulder through the sheet. She turned her face away from him.
"Harumi, I know what you're thinking."
"My career is over..." She grumbled.
Although she couldn't see it, he shook his head.
"That wasn't what I was talking about. I don't want you thinking that you and me...you know...last night when you were drunk. I didnt touch you."
She peeked her eyes out from under the sheet.
"You didn't?"
He smiled warmly and tugged the rest of the sheet away from her hands.
"No. But Minwoo did."
Harumi: O_O WHAT?! she pulled the blankets back over her head, wanting to die from shame.
Dongwan laughed his fake, dramatic actor's laugh. "Ha HAH! I'll explain everything, don't you worry..."

...What happened after Harumi passed out...

Andy looked down at her, trying to figure out what to do next. He couldn't just stand up and leave her there, but she couldn't keep laying like that in his lap with
the top half of her dress pulled down. As if he were playing with a mannequin, Andy carefully held her shoulders and picked her up to a sitting position, where
she slumped like a sandbag against his chest.
"Ok, so far so good--oh CRAP." He swore out loud as her left breast nearly fell out of her bra with the sudden change in gravity. His cheeks were still burning
from her amorous attempts a few minutes ago, and his pulse that had begun to calm down spiked through the roof again.
"No one will see this..." He whispered, looking around a few times before squeezing his eyes shut and sliding his hand over her chest to put the breast back into
the bra cup...
"Now THAT'S my boy!" yelled a voice from the door.
"GAAH!" Andy screamed. He opened his eyes and in all attempts to get his hands away from Harumi's bosom as soon as possible, he flung her several feet
away from him. He jumped up, panting.
"I didn't do anything to her! I swear!" Andy insisted to Minwoo. Minwoo's face did not lose it's devilish smirk, which made Andy's blushing all the worse.
"Of course ya didn't, riiiight ;)" He said. Andy shook his head vehemently.
"Would you just help me get her out of here already!"
Minwoo knelt down to Harumi and straightened up her clothes with no apprehension. He then hooked her arm around his shoulder and stood up.

"C'mon, party's over." He said, walking out of the lounge room with Harumi. Andy was impressed.
"How did you do that so professionally?" He asked him, as they walked into the deserted club and met with the other guys. Hyesung, Dongwan and JunJin were
comparing the phone numbers that they'd gotten from hot girls. Eric was agonizing over in a corner somewhere about his English pickup lines getting him
nowhere that night.
"I handle drunk chicks practically every night. This gets to be routine."
"...Wow..." *a/n: I love Andy's wide-eyed innocence *

...

"JunJin was the only one of us big enough to carry you through the house and up the stairs, so you have him to thank for that." Dongwan continued.
"This is so humiliating..." Harumi sighed, still hiding under the sheet.

...

"She's a lot heavier than she looks!" Jin gasped, dropping her body on the bed. Harumi giggled in her sleep when she bounced a few times on the mattress.
"Ya wanna play rough, huh? GRR!"
Minwoo looked at Andy with a "You have got to be kidding me" expression.
"And yet, you drove her away. Pity, pity." He clicked his tongue.
"What the hell was I supposed to do, date rape her??" Andy protested.
"Of course not! but there was no harm in letting her show you her best assets...:D "
"Minwoo, you're horrible." Eric sighed.
"Oh pshh like you would have turned her down, Mr. desperate! xP"
"You wanna run that by me again, SUCKA FOOL?"
"STOP IT, both of you!" JunJin yelled. "Let's just leave her alone to sleep, and in the morning we'll talk about what happened."
"But are you just gonna let her sleep like that, in her makeup and dress and all?" Hyesung asked from the back of the room, where he had stayed out of the
conversation up until this point.
"That's my cue!" Minwoo said, and in what seemed like one swift motion Harumi's green silk dress was crumpled loosely in his fist. She shivered from the
sudden cold.
The rest of Shinhwa: O_O;;; HOW THE F-CK DID YOU DO THAT!?
Minwoo grinned. "Practice!"
Andy caught one glimpse of her scantily-clad body and ran out of the room, screaming "MOMMY!".

*whoosh*
*whoosh*
Her shoes dangled from his other hand by their heels. Minwoo bowed.
"Thank you, thank you. Now I believe that it is time for our dear Harumi to get some shut eye." He pulled the covers up around her, patted her on the head and
motioned towards the door. "Shoo shoo now, everyone..."
"Minwoo..." Dongwan said with a growl as they all walked out of her room, "If I ever find you doing that to Harumi when she's conscious, I'll jam every
cigarette in Korea up your ass and light them all at once..."

...

"So that's how you got here." Dongwan finished at last. Harumi nodded, then looked skeptical again.
"Wait--that doesn't explain why you were lounging around my room in nothing but a bathrobe." She pointed out.
"Oh, that. Well, you weren't the only one who got drunk last night...Hyesung and Eric are puking pretty badly in the other bathrooms right now, and I wanted to
take a shower so I just used yours. Sorry if I scared you!" He said with his usual cheerfulness. Harumi shook her head, the hangover having somewhat worn off.
"It's not you I'm mad at, Dongwan. There won't be a meeting today--tell the guys that I'm sorry for making such a fool of myself last night. I must have
embarrassed all of you terribly. In fact, I don't think I'll be working on this project anymore." She said, sounding uncharacteristically sad and tired.
"Aw Harumi, we all stumble sometimes...don't give up! look at what you've accomplished! Hyesung, Minwoo and Andy don't smoke anymore--"
"Please, I need some time alone." She interrupted him, feeling anger and resentment at the mention of Hyesung. Dongwan sighed and was quiet for a moment.
"Alright, but you aren't going home yet--you still have Eric and JunJin to cure. Yell if you need anything." He kissed her on the cheek and walked out, leaving
her speechless for a good part of the afternoon.

...several hours later...

With the help of some aspirin, Harumi had briefly managed to get out of bed and change into some actual pajamas, then took her laptop and went straight back
to bed, where she wrote a letter of resignation to her editor. She then promptly erased the letter and wrote another one, deleted it, recovered it, re-read and
deleted it again, this time emptying her trashcan, then tried to write a fresh new draft but couldn't get past "Dear Sir...".
"Oh, this is hopeless." She said to herself, aggravated.
*knock knock*
"Harumi?"
She looked up to see Hyesung standing in the doorway, looking a little green but otherwise fine.
"I was wondering you you're feeling--"
"YOU!!!"
Hyesung blinked.
"Uhh...yes?"
"You broke your promise! LIAR!"
He tried to think of what he might have done that she knew about. Nothing came to mind...
"Harumi, I don't know what you're--"
"AAAH, YOU BASTARD!" She picked up the closest object within reach, her shoes from the previous night, and flung them at Hyesung's head.
"AAH!"
*WHUMP*
He had no time to react before the hard toe of a shoe hit him squarely in the forehead. Her other shoe was thrown with such furious intensity that it struck the
wall and was hanging by the heel, embedded in the wall.
"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!?" Hyesung yelled, putting his hand to his forehead. He picked up the green open-toed high heel and a dim light went
off inside his head. He walked over to the wall mirror, checking what looked to be a huge welt over his left eye.
Hey...Harumi has the same taste in shoes that Harisu does! he thought.
"You KNOW what I'm mad at! I know you were smoking at that party last night! you broke your promise to me!" Harumi ranted angrily. Hyesung turned
around with that same dazed expression as before.
"How could you know that?? the only time I smoked was in the...bath...room..." His words trailed off as that dim light started to glow a little brighter...and he
thought about those green shoes under the stall door...
"You were SPYING ON ME?!" He suddenly yelled, putting the pieces together. "You snuck into the MEN'S ROOM and spied on me having a smoke?!"
"AH-HA! So you admit to it!" She shouted triumphantly, completely ignoring his accusation.
"Ok yes, I smoked last night! I was drunk! I get drunk a lot! but that doesn't give you the right to...uh, Harumi?"
He trailed off again as Harumi burst into tears and hid her wailing face against a pillow.
"Harumi?"
*sniffle* "Hyesung...I didn't know that you had so many demons to fight...I didn't know that you were an ALCOHOLIC TOO!"
"I'm NOT an alcoholic!" Hyesung protested vehemently.
*sniff* "They all say that..." Harumi jumped out of bed and wiped the tears off her face. Walking up to Hyesung, she touched his face tenderly and smiled with
moved compassion in her eyes.
"We have such a long road ahead of us." She said softly, and wrapped her arms around him in a big hug. The stunned Hyesung relented for a moment and then
tried to push her off of him, but she held on for dear life.
"This doesn't mean that I'll let you get away with spying...oh, forget it." He said, concluding halfway through his sentence that she was just a wacko and that it
was impossible to make rational decisions with crazy people like her.
"I'm sorry for breaking my promise last night." He said, with the exact same tone that Eeyore the bipolar donkey from Winnie The Pooh used.
"I forgive you...I understand that you have mental problems, but with the right help you can be cured!" Harumi said joyfully.
Hyesung: grrrr....

"I feel newly energized--like I've been given a second chance at this!" Harumi said happily, pulling away from Hyesung after what must have been a full five
minutes of hugging. "After I found out about your breakdown--"
"--IT WAS NOT A BREAKDOWN! I SMOKED ONE LITTLE CIGARETTE!"
"--After I found out about your breakdown last night, I was crushed--I almost gave this project up entirely!" Harumi continued. "But now that I know I can still
help all of you, I'm thinking about not only finishing the project but extending the deadline!" ^___^
Hyesung's blood ran cold. "You can't be serious."
Harumi giggled and tweaked his nose *the farthest she could reach was his nose, as she was rather short*.
"Enough of your silliness, I've got some planning to do!" She turned away from him, flipped her laptop back open and started quickly typing a new letter to her
editor for permission to stay another week at Shinhwa's house.

Hyesung walked out of her room, his forehead still smarting. What he didn't expect to see was Eric and JunJin waiting outside for him in the hallway.
"What?" He said, suspicious of the murderous glares that Eric and JunJin were giving him.
"Harumi almost quit because of you...and yet you somehow persuaded her to not only STAY, but to STAY LONGER?!" Eric yelled, a vein on his neck standing
out with rage.
"We were ALMOST FREE OF HER PSYCHOSIS!!" JunJin also yelled through clenched teeth.

"Uh oh...guess you heard our conversation..." Hyesung said, his eyes wide. He turned around and ran away as fast he could, with Eric and JunJin chasing him
with full intention of making him pay.
Day 12

Great news! my editor has OK'd me extending the deadline to finish the project--so I get seven more days to stay with Shinhwa! We have become so close--like
I have six wonderful brothers.
"She isn't here again." Minwoo said, looking around the empty living room.
"That means she's up to something."
They were all relieved, however, by the absence of turkey feathers and paper plates of meat.
"I'm in here, boys!" Harumi called out, pushing open the kitchen door and sending a delicious-smelling warm air flow through the house.
Any further suspicion on part of the guys was immediately replaced by one thought:
"FOOD! " They all yelled excitedly, pushing each other out of the way as they ran to the kitchen. *A/N: typical guys right?*

They raced into the kitchen and found Harumi in a pink apron, stirring a bowl of something and humming busily to herself. The large kitchen table had been set
with plates, forks, butter, syrup, strawberry jam, two kinds of juice and coffee.
Shinhwa: O_o - - -> :D
"I still feel so bad about the way I acted at that party the other night, so I made you all breakfast ^^." She chirped, smiling in a motherly way at Andy (he looked
down at his feet).

"...Waffles..." Eric said dreamily as she poured batter into a Hello Kitty-shaped waffle iron and set the lid down. She pulled a towering stack of crispy pre-done
Hello Kitty-faced waffles from the oven and set the platter on the table with her pink oven mitts.
"Sit down, we'll have our meeting around the table." She said, stepping out of the way right before they all leaped for the chairs and tried to tear each other
apart for the top waffle.

"Geesh err awshum, Hrumah." Hyesung said with his mouth full.
*Translation: These are awesome, Harumi*
"Thanks Harumi!"
"Yah, thanks!"
All of them were smiling and acting like rowdy little boys on a sunday morning. She took one waffle, carried it to the table with her and daintily cut Hello
Kitty's ears off first, just like at home.
"Isn't that a bit much, hyung?" Andy asked as JunJin sliced into seven waffles at once.
"I can't smoke anymore!" He complained. "I gotta make up for it somehow!"
Harumi beamed and patted him on the arm. "That's a good boy."
"I didn't know you could cook, Harumi!" Dongwan said. She looked down at the golden kitty face modestly.
"It's no trouble, I make these at home for my boyfriend all the time."

All conversation and movement immediately ceased.

Andy and Minwoo dropped their forks, clattering loudly on their plates in the abrupt silence. Hyesung half-choked on his waffles, prompting Eric and JunJin
*sitting on either side of him* to start pounding him hard on his back. Dongwan merely froze, with his fork still in his mouth and fingers wrapped around a
glass of apple juice. They all just stared at her.
"B-B-B-BOYFRIEND!?" Hyesung sputtered.
Harumi blushed. "Is it really such a big deal, guys?"
"NO WONDER you resisted my advances!" Minwoo suddenly shouted. "I KNEW that there had to be a reason to turn down a sex god like me!"
"It certainly couldn't have been your sparkling personality that drove her away." JunJin said out loud to himself.
"Why didn't you tell us about it before?" Eric asked, scratching his head.
She cut the other ear off of her waffle and swirled it around in a little pool of pancake syrup, uncomfortable.
"It never seemed to come up, I guess..."
"Well come on, give us the dish!" JunJin was acting unintentionally gay again.
"Um...can't we talk about smoking, which is what I'm here for?" She said with an uneasy titter.
They all shook their heads at once, except Dongwan who stood up and carried his plate politely to the sink.
"Thanks for the breakfast, Harumi. I'll be out doing stuff today, call me on my cell if you need me." He said, looking away from all of them and rinsing out his
glass.

Only Hyesung noticed this. The others were too busy grilling Harumi about her love life.
"He's uh, he's an assistant to another publisher that works in the same building that I do..." She started to tell them, growing a little more confident as she went
on. "We've been going together for about four months now..."
Hyesung would have probably been interested to hear the rest of her story but there was something about the way Dongwan was acting that bugged him. He
quietly excused himself and caught him in his room. Dongwan was throwing boxing gloves into a gym bag.
"What was that all about?" He asked him, leaning against the door frame.
"What was what?" Dongwan didn't look at him either. He pretended to be searching for something on the top shelf of his closet.
"You know what I'm talking about. Breakfast."
"Oh. That."
"Well?"
Dongwan zipped the bag up and finally turned to Hyesung. The anger on his face would scare a baby to the point of crying.
"Isn't it obvious?" He growled.
"What? what's obvious?" Hyesung was about to pull his own hair out if Dongwan didnt tell him.
"I'M IN LOVE WITH HER, YOU IDIOT!"
Day 13.

They've managed to get out of the morning meetings for too long now. It's time to get back to the basics and remember what we're here for!

"Good MORRR-NING!" Harumi sang out as the boys made their way to the living room, rubbing their eyes.
"How the hell do you stay so damn PERKY!?" JunJin demanded to know. Harumi clasped her hands to her heart and leaned back.
"It's the knowledge that you all will overcome your deadly habits of smoking that keeps a smile on my face." She said dreamily.
Shinhwa: Whatever

She took a large stack of blank notebooks, the kind you would use in school, out of her lap and handed one to each man along with a pen. They took theirs with
very suspicious looks.
"What's this for?" Minwoo asked.
"It's a daily journal for your experiences, cigarette cravings and thoughts." She said. "I won't be reading them, so you don't have to worry about writing
something too personal. Let your pens flow free across the page!"

Much grumbling and resentment followed, but they all hunched over their notebooks and wrote for about ten minutes.

Eric's Journal Entry:

wUt Da FAWK iZ gOiN oN wIt meeh??????

i WuZ jUsS hAbIn TyM 2 mAiSeLf WeN dIs Ho HaRuMi BuSt In On MaI sTyLe n MaDe MeEh PuT dA StOgZ oUt.

DAM WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HAYT JOO!!!!

Y U B aLl Up In MaI bIzZnIzZ fO sHiZzLe?

iF i WaNt 2 sMoKe DeN i HAB a SmOkE!!!!!!!!!

cUz iMa GANGSTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...WERRRRD...

"Heh Heh...das raight...represent yo." Eric said quietly with a smirk as he closed his journal.

Hyesung's Journal Entry:

Forehead still bruised. Luckily my bangs cover it. Thank you lord, I haven't changed my hairstyle in 10 years and it pays off at last!

Nicorette gum is the only thing that stands between myself and homicide.

Dongwan's Journal Entry:

What am I doing this for, anyway? I don't even smoke! I'm just doing it to make Harumi happy. Even though I shouldn't care about making her happy anymore
because I just found out that she has a boyfriend. Whoever her boyfriend is, I hate him. I bet he's UGLY! REALLY UGLY! SO UGLY THAT I HAVE TO
SPELL IT UHHG-LEEE!! And I bet that he doesn't WORK OUT like ME! or SING like ME! or have LOTS OF MONEY like ME! and he doesn't deserve an
awesome girl like Harumi, like I DO! BAH! FINE!

"FINE! HAVE A DAMN BOYFRIEND! SEE IF I FREAKIN' CARE!" Dongwan suddenly yelled. Everyone looked up.
O_o?
"Ah, sorry...did I just say that out loud? heh heh...STOP LOOKING AT ME!" he half-shouted. Frightened, they all went back to their own journals.

JunJin's Journal Entry:

Why is everyone around me insane. Seriously. I'm the only halfway normal person in this whole psychotic group. That's why I smoke--to retain whatever sanity
that hasn't been driven out of me by these wackjobs. So dammit, I'm gonna have a damn cigarette! damn damn double damn!

Minwoo's journal entry for today consisted largely of his signatures, smiley faces, drawings of women's breasts, a completed tic tac toe game and a scribbled
drawing of a cat face, with an arrow pointing to it that said "THIS IS A CAT!".

"Heehee...heehee..." Minwoo kept giggling to himself while writing.

Andy's Journal entry:

Minwoo is creeping me out. Why is he giggling like that? I don't want to know so I won't ask. Anyway, I'm pretty proud of myself for not touching any
cigarettes for the last few days. Guess Harumi scared me straight. I hope she never does that again, I want to stay pure of heart and pure of mind until I meet the
perfect girl. And then when I meet that perfect girl, we'll wait until we are married to be impure, but I'll cover my eyes during the whole impure act so that my
innocent eyes will remain as virgin as snow...(goes on for several pages)...

"Is everyone done?" Harumi asked when they all had closed their notebooks and looked up (Andy was the last to finish). Shinhwa nodded.

"Would anyone like to read theirs?" She asked, flashing back to high school writing classes and realizing that she sounded far too much like her old teachers.

*silence*

"...Anyone??" Harumi said, looking sad.

"Heeheehee!" Minwoo giggled again.

"Well...that's all we had to do for today ^^;;" She said. Before the words could leave her mouth, the entire living room was deserted and nary a trace of Shinhwa
was left, except Dongwan who stayed behind.

"Something you wanted, Dongwan?" She asked him sweetly.

"I uh...wanted to know...oh, it's nothing. Forget it." He said, his nerve failing him.
"Are you sure?"
Dongwan nodded glumly. "Yeah, I'm sure."
Day Fourteen

Today marks my second solid week with Shinhwa! ^__^ It's been a great experience for me to get to know these guys so well, but sometimes I do miss my
home in Tokyo ^^;;;

The day had started off rather uneventfully, as the morning meeting was scrapped in favor of Shinhwa getting to a radio interview on time. Harumi tagged
along as usual, monitoring them closely to see if they had been smoking.

"Don't turn around..." JunJin suddenly warned Eric. Harumi was crouched down behind him, suddenly smelling the air. JunJin had the perfect picture of a cat in
his head, with Harumi twitching her tail back and forth.
"What--AAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!" Eric had almost no time to react before Harumi leaped onto his back, burying her nose into his shoulder.
Harumi: *sniff sniff*
"WHUT DA FAWK ARE YOU DOING?!" He yelled, trying to throw her off.
*sniff sniff* "I thought for sure I smelled cigarette smoke on you..." She muttered, sliding gracefully back down the ground and brushing herself off.
"Heh heh...My mistake...sorry Eric ^^;;;;"
From then on, he made sure that his back was never, ever again to Harumi.

Other than that, not much had happened at the radio interview. They got back to the house around mid-afternoon. With some free time, Hyesung and Eric
vanished upstairs to play video games. JunJin was looking for food in the kitchen, Andy was studying, Minwoo was scheming up ways to get Harumi to sleep
with him (most of his plots involved a few bottles of Sake), and Dongwan was playing checkers with Harumi while secretly agonizing over the heavy hand of
that fate had dealt him.

You know...whoever her boyfriend is, he IS quite a ways away from here...and I'm sitting right in front of her...heh heh... he thought to himself, absent-
mindedly pushing a black checker disk into the next available space.
Uh oh...why does she look so happy all of a sudden? Dongwan froze as a huge smile came over Harumi's face and she picked up a nearby red piece with a
certain kind of vengeance.
I wasn't thinking out loud again...WAS I???
Harumi slammed the piece over half the board, shrieking loudly.
"Jump, jump, jump, JUMP!! KING ME!! WHOOOOOO-OOH!"
Dongwan let out a huge exhale of relief as he realized that she had totally kicked his ass in Checkers, not learned his secret.
"Ahhhaha! King you! Got it! You're kinged! You win!" He said breathlessly, very happy to let her win the game. He never liked checkers anyway, he thought as
he stood up.
Harumi gave him a strange look. "Where are you going? the game isn't over yet! Just 'cuz I got a king doesn't mean I won."
Dongwan now felt very, very dumb as he sat back down.
"Your turn!" She cheered.
"Heheh...right...^^;;;;;"
Dongwan had just placed his finger on another piece when...

*ding*
*dong*
*diiiing...*
*...donnng*

The doorbell rang. Everyone within earshot looked up from what they were doing (except for Hyesung and Eric, who were lost in the faraway universe of
Starcraft)
"Someone's at the door!" JunJin said, sticking his head out of the kitchen with four boxes of crackers in his arms.
"Nobody comes to our door!" Andy shouted, jumping up. He ran to the front door with Minwoo, Dongwan and JunJin at his heels.
"Outta the way, I wanna answer it!"
"No, I heard it first!"
"Well I got here first so I should be the one to open!"
*push**shove**oof*
*ding...dong...*

"Dongwan, it's still your turn!" Harumi yelled out from the next room.
"I know, Harumi!" he yelled out, in the process losing his place in the fight to open the door first. Minwoo managed to tear Andy away from his superglue-like
hold against the knob and finally threw open the front door, panting.

"Hello. I hope that I have come to the right house? Shinhwa's house, I assume." A cool, sexy man's voice said.

JunJin, Andy, Dongwan and Minwoo looked up to see the most beautiful man that any of them had ever laid eyes on. From his longish, silky hair to his perfect
skin, gentle white smile, broad shoulders, impeccable suit and glowing eyes, he looked every part of a young, rich celebrity. He held a sleek cellular phone in
one hand and a bouquet of long-stemmed roses in the other.
"Who-who are you?" JunJin stuttered. The man's smile faltered for a moment, then came back with ten times the heart-melting power.
"I'm sorry, I should have already introduced myself. My name is Nakamura...Koichi Nakamura."
"KOICHI-KUN?!" Harumi suddenly appeared at the foot of the stairs, running down them with her arms outstretched.
"HARUMI-CHAN!!" He yelled while pushing through the slack-jawed, bug-eyed members of Shinhwa. He threw down the roses just in time to swing her
around in a passionate embrace, like two lovers reuniting at an airport.
"Mugga jugga...bubba hugga uppa muppa..." Dongwan babbled incoherently, refusing to believe what he was seeing.
Harumi finally slipped out of the man's embrace, smoothing her hair back down and smiling demurely.
"You guys...this is Koichi. My boyfriend ^_^."
Hyesung and Eric heard screams and came walking down the stairs in the midst of all this chaos.
"Who the heck is that?" Hyesung said, getting no reply from the shell-shocked other members of Shinhwa.
"It's Harumi's boyfriend...Koichi." Minwoo said loudly, as if he could not believe it. He sounded more like he was affirming it to himself.

Hyesung's eyes widened and he looked at Dongwan, who's head appeared to be on the verge of exploding.
"What are you doing here?" Harumi asked Koichi in Japanese, forgetting that she was in Korea.
"I heard that SODAPOP was extending your deadline and I couldn't bear to be without you for another seven days, so I made this little daytrip to come and see
you, darling! aren't you happy to see me?" He asked, making a puppy face that even Minwoo could not beat. Harumi hugged him again.
"Of course I'm happy! Oh, Koichi-kun!"
"Harumi-chan!"
"GAAAAAAH!!!" Dongwan couldn't take it any longer, and ran out the front door flailing his arms. The love-spell over the two suddenly broke, and they
looked out to their unintentional audience.
"Was that Dongwan?" She asked.
Shinhwa:...O_O...
"Oh crap." Hyesung said, wondering if he should follow Dongwan and make sure that he wasn't about to go drive off a cliff.
Koichi kissed Harumi and said "My flight back to Tokyo is at 11 tonight, so why don't you and me go out to dinner? I'll be here to pick you up at six o'clock."
"I--I...okay!" She said happily. He turned around and addressed the rest of Shinhwa.
"Nice to meet all of you." He said with his twinkling eyes. They nodded dumbly in response. He picked up the roses, handed them to Harumi and made his
graceful exit back out the front door to his rented car. Everyone crept to the windows and watched him leave. A thick silence followed after his car had pulled
out of sight.

Then they all started talking at once--justifying themselves for leaving the room.

Eric and Hyesung: "We're gonna go back to our game..."

JunJin: "Yeah, I'm going to go keep, uh, eating."
Andy: "I still need to study..."
Minwoo completely blew it.
"That guy was HOT! I'm not saying I'm gay or anythin', ha ha, but dang, if I WAS..."
Harumi, Eric, Hyesung, JunJin, Andy, Minwoo: O_o
"Why's everyone looking at me like that?" Minwoo said, not getting it.
"What's gay?" Andy said innocently.
JunJin, Hyesung and Eric all were struck with massive headaches at the same time.
"Just forget it..." JunJin groaned. He patted Harumi on the back on his way back to the kitchen. "Have fun tonight with Mr. Wonderful..."
"Oh, I will." She said, although something was beginning to gnaw at her insides.

...Several hours later, at the trendiest restaurant in Seoul...

"So then I said to him, 'You idiot! my three year old nephew could write better than this!' AH HA HAHAHA!"
"Heh heh...heh..." Harumi made herself laugh at his joke. She had been doing it the whole night through. She couldn't understand why she hadn't seen how self-
absorbed Koichi was until tonight, after the second time that she had caught him checking his teeth in the reflection of a butter knife. He had ordered the most
expensive wine and food on the menu, while she had a Caesar salad and water. Why did he have to be so flashy?

"So, Harumi my dear. You've barely said anything all evening. Is something wrong?" He asked her, taking the spoon out of his bowl of soup and eyeing it. She
shook her head and played with the corners of her cloth napkin.
"I've been unfaithful to you!" She blurted out. Koichi lowered his spoon.
"Eh, come again?" He asked, leaning forward. Harumi looked down, ashamed.

"Since coming here to work on the Shinhwa project, I've made out with Minwoo in a closet, repeatedly shown him my breasts, slept in the same bed with him,
tried to force myself on Andy--"
She was interrupted by his low, sexy laugh and looked up to see him leaning one side of his face into his hand, looking amused.
"You call that infidelity? Ha. That's nothing compared to what I've been up to since you left two weeks ago."
Harumi: O.o;;;;; go on...
He leaned in closer. She could not smell any wine on his breath, so she decided that he was just an idiot.
"You know all the single girls at the office?" He whispered, half-giggling.
Harumi's eyes widened. "...Yes..."
"I've slept with every single one of them in the time that you've been gone!" He announced triumphantly, leaning back.

Harumi gasped. "You can't mean that!"

"Of course I can. You think an incredibly handsome, charming, successful young man like me can go for over two weeks without a woman? Oh now, don't look
so put out...it doesn't mean that we have to break up!"
He had left her totally speechless, which is why she did what she did next.

Without another word, Harumi picked up her nearly-full glass, pulled her arm back and threw her ice water all over Koichi's smiling face with a fury that only
women like she could possess. Everyone else in the restaurant looked up from their own business and gasped at the scene that she had made. Koichi was
stunned beyond words, much like her.

"I...I..." He choked out, water droplets shimmering among the gel in his hair and dripping off the end of his elegant nose.
"SAYONARA, YOU BASTARD!" Harumi yelled, as two waiters came up and escorted her out of the restaurant as discreetly as they could. Koichi just sat
there, frozen.
"AND BY THE WAY...I'M IN LOVE WITH DONGWAN!" She screamed out loud enough for the whole place to hear, not realizing what she had said until the
words left her mouth. The waiters pushed her out the door and left her standing alone on the street, the cold evening air doing it's part to calm her down.

What did I just say back there?! Harumi repeated over and over again in her head. She hailed a taxicab and got in the backseat, telling the driver how to get to
Shinhwa's house.

Did I really mean it? Or was I just upset...I can't believe Koichi! after everything we've been through together! Typical man!

But Dongwan wouldn't act like that. He's always been so sweet to me...even when the other Shinhwa guys aren't cooperating with the project, he supports what
I do no matter what...and we did have fun at that party when I was his date...

The taxi made it to the front gate of the house, breaking Harumi's train of thought. As she walked quietly up to the door and the car drove away, she had a small,
secretive smile on her face. There was something different in the way that she saw things now, said things, thought things.
So I am in love with him?
I guess I am ^_^
Day 15

Harumi tiptoed up to the front door, opened it quietly and slipped out of her shoes in the entryway. It was late and the house was silent, so she was walking very
quietly up the stairs when--
"Yo."
Harumi looked over her shoulder and saw JunJin standing at the foot of the stairs, sucking on a Popsicle.
"You make it home ok?" He asked her. She nodded, then went to continue up the stairs--but something clicked in her head and she turned around again with a
sly smile.
"JunJin...don't tell me that you stayed up this late just to make sure that I got back safely..." She started, but Jin only shook his head.
"Nah, I just got up 'cuz I was hungry. But them, on the other hand..." He took the popsicle out of his mouth and waved it at the living room, where Harumi
curiously followed. She was touched by the sight of all five guys slumped over themselves and each other on the couches, fast asleep. Minwoo was stretched
across the laps of both Eric and Hyesung, who were sprawled back on one couch. Andy was curled up on one end of the other couch with his thumb in his
mouth; Dongwan took the other side, cuddling with his trusty baseball bat.

"I knew you were fine on your own, but the other guys wanted to stay up and make sure." JunJin continued. Harumi smiled. "Let's not wake them up. They look
so sweet."
JunJin pouted. "But that would be fun!"
"Goodnight, JunJin."
He took one final *SLURP* off his Popsicle and grinned, the lime flavor having temporarily dyed his teeth and lips green.
"G'night, Harumi!"

Such funny little boys...she thought as she went up to her room and changed out of her dress into soft pajamas. The night's drama had exhausted her; she was
looking forward to some sleep as she snuggled underneath the covers and hugged her pillow.

She suddenly tensed, as she heard her door open a crack.

Sitting up and blinking as light from the hallway poured into her room, she saw--
"Dongwan?"
--Standing in the doorway. He was bare to the waist and wore only a pair of red sweatpants. Harumi guessed that it had been warm in his room, as he seemed to
have a glistening sheen of sweat on his ripped body.
Harumi nervously pushed a lock of hair behind her ear as he silently walked into her room, as smooth as a panther stalking it's prey. He sat down on the side of
her bed and looked deeply into her eyes.
"How was your date?" he said in a low, outrageously sexy voice that Harumi had never heard him use before.
"It was...awful." She admitted. "Koichi and I broke up."
"I'm sorry to hear that." Dongwan said, not sounding at all sincere. "Koichi should know how to treat a woman."
Harumi looked away, blushing like crazy.
"Dongwan...you're acting so strange all of a sudden..."
"It's because I know what a woman wants." He whispered, as he grabbed Harumi around the waist and pulled her to him in what must have been the juiciest,
hottest kiss on record.

Surprised, she struggled for a moment--then slowly melted into his strong, solid arms. His lips were buttery-soft and moved in just the right way over hers. And
he smelled FANTASTIC. She found herself powerless to resist him as he moved his mouth from her lips and down her neck. She only tangled her fingers into
his hair, silently begging for more.
"Ohhh...I can't believe this is happening..." Harumi murmured when he pulled away her pajama top and continued his kisses downward. Dongwan looked up
and placed one finger to her lips with a lusty smirk.
"No more words, baby..."
She nodded, breathless, and slid down as he moved on top of her. She ran her hands down his back, over every golden inch of his skin. His body was like one
solid, glistening, column of muscle-bound perfection. Boldened by his sweet caresses, she slipped her fingers beneath the waistband of his sweatpants and
found nothing but more glorious skin there--

*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*

"Hey! Harumi!"
Harumi opened one blurry eye. "Wha..." Sitting up in bed with all of her clothes on and evidence of no one else in the room except her, she rubbed her eyes and
looked around. Mid-morning sunlight illuminated the whole room.
It was a DREAM?! GOD DARNIT ALL TO...!
"Harumi, are you up?"
She got out of bed and tromped sadly to the door, where she opened it to see Eric and Hyesung standing there in front of her.
"Hey...what's up?" She asked.
Hyesung scratched his head. "We were wondering the same thing. It's 12:30 PM and you still weren't up."
"Oh!" Harumi said, realizing how late it was. "I'm sorry! I guess it's too late for a meeting now, isn't it...oh well, did you guys at least write something in your
journals?"
Eric and Hyesung looked at each other.
"You mean you aren't going to freak out about missing the morning meeting?" Eric asked her. Harumi shook her head.
"What can I say...I had a hard night."
Day 16

Today was such a busy day! Shinhwa has a concert coming up, so it was rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal!! The absence of tobacco has visibly improved their
abilities to sing and dance, so now they look and sound a thousand times better than they did before--hard to imagine, isn't it? ^^

The household was chaos that morning, as all seven people living in the house struggled to wake up and get ready to leave at the same time. Harumi
volunteered to handle breakfast, but sadly she had no time to make waffles so it was all about cereal this time. Struggling under the weight of several milk
cartons, cereal boxes and bowls, she nearly dropped it all on the floor when she heard an ear-shattering scream come from upstairs.
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKK!!!"
Minwoo, who somehow had the ability to get ready for any event within three minutes of getting out of bed, looked up from his magazine that he had been
reading while waiting for everyone else.

Minwoo: "That sounded like a woman's scream..."

"OH MY GOD!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Screamed the voice again. Harumi poked her head out of the kitchen.
"That wasn't a woman! that sounded like..."
"JUNJIN!" They both yelled at the same time. Minwoo leaped up from his chair and raced up the stairs alongside Harumi. They found the rest of the Shinhwa
members clustered around the bathroom at the end of the hall. JunJin was near tears in Hyesung's arms, who was trying to comfort him while rolling his eyes
with irritation.
"It can't be right...it CAN'T..." JunJin mumbled almost incoherently, pointing at something. "It just...CAN'T!"
"What's going on?" Minwoo asked Eric. Eric was snickering quietly behind his hand.
"THE SCALE IS BROKEN, THAT'S WHAT'S GOING ON!" JunJin yelled at them. "THAT'S WHAT IT HAS TO BE!"
"JunJin gained seven pounds in the last few days." Eric explained. "It's because he's been eating so much to keep from smoking..."
Harumi looked down at the ground. "It's all my fault - -;;."
Dongwan patted her shoulder. "No it isn't! at least he's not smoking!" He tried to reassure her.
"I won't die of lung cancer now...I'LL DIE OF...OF...FATNESS!" JunJin burst into tears and buried his face into hyesung's shoulder.
"Fatness isn't a...oh, forget it." Hyesung sighed, patting him on the back.
Minwoo shook his head.
"Come on you guys, we only have a few more minutes until we have to leave. Let's all go eat breakfast."
Hyesung and Andy went on either side of JunJin as they walked with him out of the bathroom, following everyone else to the dining room. As they all sat down
at the table, JunJin put a single bran flake and a single raisin into his bowl, crushing them into microscopic particles with his spoon. He ate each particle one at
a time, drowning himself in between with cup after cup of coffee.

Harumi took out her clipboard and made a quick note:

Hyesung: Alcoholic
Minwoo: Sexaholic
JunJin: Anorexic??????

"Hey Harumi--" Dongwan's voice interrupted her writings. She looked up with pink cheeks.
"Huh?"
"How was your date?" He asked, smiling sweetly. Harumi nearly spewed her orange juice across the table.
"It was awful! Koichi and I broke up!" She said breathlessly, wanting to recreate the dream that she had.

Oh, if only he was half-naked and sitting on my bed!

HARUMI MURASAKI! YOU STOP THAT DIRTY THINKING RIGHT NOW, YOUNG LADY! Yelled her conscience. She giggled a little.
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that." Dongwan said, this time sounding sincere. He frowned a little.
Come on...say it...say the next line...Harumi silently prayed.
"Koichi should know how to treat a woman!" Minwoo piped up from across the table. Harumi nearly kicked him in the shin for that!
Minwoooo, you're ruining it!!!

Later, at the concert rehearsal...

"DAMMIT, YOU DID IT AGAIN!"

"IT WAS YOUR FAULT!"
"NO IT WASN'T! IT WAS ANDY'S FAULT!"
"Me? I didn't do anything! and Minwoo, would you PLEASE STOP SWEARING!"
"GOD DAMMIT, I'M NOT SWEARING!"

The stage manager rushed up to the boys.

"Guys, guys, what's the matter??"
All six of them started angrily yelling at once.
"Ok, so we're dancing and lipsynching while dancing, right? and I did my part of the song fine, right? right?" Minwoo yelled. He pointed at JunJin.
"After my part comes JunJin's rap...but he's so damn FAT that he's out of breath from dancing and he totally messed up the cue!"
"I'm NOT FAT! I'm...I'm...OK, DAMMIT! I AM FAT! I'M A WALRUS! WAAAAHHH..." He ran offstage.
Andy, the all-knowing one, shook his head. "Such a drama queen. He'll be fine in a few hours. No Harumi, don't go after him--" He warned, seeing the alarmed
look on Harumi's face. "--he only wants attention."
"You can't bribe him with boobietime in the closet, either." Minwoo said with a wink to her. She looked away, blushing.
Dongwan cracked his knuckles at that remark.

Several hours later...

"Well, look who's back..." Hyesung said calmly after JunJin came sulking back onstage.
"Just don't call me fat anymore." He sniffled.
Harumi's eyes shone. "Oh, you big baby. Come here and give me a hug!"
Day 17

Today I presented Shinhwa with the ultimate test of their strength: without my pressure, could they resist smoking when presented with a cigarette???

I'm also getting a little nervous over the fact that Eric and JunJin still have not decided to quit smoking forever...^^;;;;;;

"Merry Christmas! Ho ho ho!" Harumi greeted the boys as they showed up for the usual meeting.
Shinhwa: O_o whaaat?
Harumi gestured to a stack of shiny wrapped boxes piled up in the corner like a game show hostess showing off prizes.
"At least she's not in a Santa suit, making us do the reindeer dance..." JunJin muttered, making them all snicker.
"Sit down, guys! come on!" Harumi said with her bright smile. "I have a present for each one of you!"
As suspicious as ever, they all sat down, eyeing her closely. Dongwan rushed up to Harumi.
"Need any help? " He asked her.
"Well...you could pass these out for me..." Harumi said, fluttering her eyelashes. She handed him the stack of boxes and their fingers touched, making the
usually cool-around-ladies Dongwan blush.

Hyesung, the only one that knew of Dongwan's crush on her, nearly gagged.
"Thank you SO MUCH, you sweet thing." He said with a smirk, taking the box labeled with his name out of Dongwan's hand. When they were all sitting there
with the still-wrapped presents in their laps, wondering why this was happening, Harumi jumped up.
"Ok guys, you can open them when I leave the room! wheehee!" She giggled, skipping merrily out of the room.

Eric put his on the floor, very carefully scooting it away with the tip of his toe.
"That means it's a bomb for sure. I don't wanna open it. It'll explode or something."

Meanwhile, Minwoo and JunJin were happily tearing into theirs. (Minwoo and JunJin: PRESENT! YAY!)

They turned out to be shoeboxes full of something. All eyes were on them as they started to lift up the lids--

"WAIT, YOU IDIOTS!" Hyesung yelled. Minwoo and JunJin looked up, confused.
"Give us some time to hide, in case it is a bomb!"
Dongwan rolled his eyes. "It's NOT a bomb."
"Yeah, how would you know? I bet ya packed the bombs WITH her! I know all about you two!" Hyesung jeered, poking Dongwan's shoulder.
The rest of Shinhwa: O_o What?
Dongwan slugged Hyesung, panicking. "I have no idea what he's talking about!!! Really!! There's nothing special at all about my feelings for--"
He was back to being ignored again, as JunJin and Minwoo went back to their presents.
"Wait-a-minute...everyone has to open theirs at the same time. If I get blown up, YOU get blown up." Minwoo said, narrowing his eyes at everyone. JunJin
nodded emphatically.
They all exchanged sideways glances, but picked up their own boxes and very carefully tore open the wrapping paper. They had identical shoeboxes.
"Hmm..." Dongwan said, picking his up and shaking it. Something small inside banged against the cardboard walls.
"DON'T SHAKE IT! IT'LL GO OFF!!!" Andy screamed, grabbing Eric and trying to hide behind him.
"ARRRR!" Eric yelled at Andy. "Get off me! You know I don't buy into your homo crap!"
"Oh, right...sorry, Eric..."
"Can we just open the damn things?" Dongwan asked, irritated.
They threw the lids off the boxes, flinching as if they expected whatever was inside the box to attack them. *A/N: I think they deserve to be this paranoid,
considering what Harumi's done to them...*

"HEY! cigarettes!" JunJin said happily.

They opened their eyes and saw that in each of the boxes, an unopened carton of Camels lay in wait. Gingerly picking them up, Eric, Hyesung, Andy and
JunJin ecstatically smiled at each other.

"Do you know what this means?!" Eric yelled, jumping up with joy.
"Dare I to hope?" Hyesung asked, jumping up as well.
"It means...it means...wait...what does it mean?" Andy asked, scratching his head.
"It means that SHE GAVE UP ON US!!! WHOOOOHOOOO!" Eric yelled.
"OUR LIVES ARE BACK TO NORMAL!"
"WE CAN SMOKE AGAIN!"
"WE CAN BE NORMAL AGAIN!"

Dongwan's face fell. He realized that he still had yet to open his box. Since his couldn't contain cigarettes...what could be in it? He lifted the lid on his present
and found...

Chocolate. Extremely expensive, top-quality chocolate.

"Ya gonna eat that?" JunJin asked him, as Dongwan became are of the fact that he was eyeing it. "Cuz I know you don't like junk food...hrrragahhh *A/N:
Homer Simpson drooling sound*..."

Dongwan blushed. "I--well--I was gonna--maybe, for her--"

"OK! thanks man! you're a great friend!" JunJin said, tearing the box out of his hand and devouring all of the chocolates at once.
Dongwan: I will make you pay for that...

"Ok, so let's light 'em up!" Hyesung said happily, taking his long-forgotten lighter out of his pocket and flicking the little wheel. A beautiful flame shot up, like
the fire goddess that nurtures and sustains all smoking activities.

Minwoo was licking his box of cigarettes.

"What the f-ck are you doing?" Eric asked, trying to scoot away as much as possible from him.
Minwoo giggled. "Ever since that hypnotherapy session...dang these things make me horny...I don't even have to smoke 'em either..."
Shinhwa: O_O;;;;;;;
"Uh, Minwoo...how about you go into the closet for a few minutes?" JunJin said, standing up and putting his hand on Minwoo's shoulder.
Minwoo looked up, his gaze foggy. "Is Harumi gonna be there?"
"NO, she isn't." Dongwan added, standing up and grabbing Minwoo by the arm. Dongwan and JunJin pulled him to his feet and dragged him across the floor to
the living room closet, threw him in, threw the cigarettes in and slammed the door.
"Thanks guys...I need some time alone with my ciggies...heehehe..."
Dongwan and JunJin looked at each other.
"He just gets weirder by the day."

"OK, so we gonna have a victory smoke or not!! we haven't even opened the cartons!" Hyesung insisted, starting to go crazy from the suspense.
"Alright, alright, keep your damn panties on..." JunJin muttered.

They all took out a beautiful, clean, unsmoked, virgin cigarette, and trembled with joy as the lighter came to each one. But before they could take an inhale--
"Guys...this is wrong." Andy said quietly.
Eric, JunJin, Hyesung: oh good lord...here he goes again...
"She really wanted us to overcome this. All that work...and we're still smoking."
O_o
"Yeah...I guess you have a point...and she was trying to help us..." Hyesung said.
Eric's lips quivered, as if he were about to start crying.
"But--but--but--NOOO!!" JunJin wailed, as Andy shook his head and stubbed his out in a nearby ashtray (the ashtrays had been remarkably spotless for the last
two weeks). Hyesung grudgingly did the same.

Eric and JunJin shook their heads stubbornly.

"Come on...it's the right thing to do." Hyesung said sadly, stubbing his out.
On the verge of tears, Jin and Eric finally put theirs out too.

Dongwan beamed. :D

"Let's go find Harumi and tell her that we didn't smoke!" Andy said cheerfully, as they moved out of the living room and up to her room. They plodded along
slowly, refusing to believe that they had just been talked out of their one last chance to smoke.

Minwoo remained in his closet, happily molesting his pack of cigarettes.

Day 18

Today I opened up and told Shinhwa the real reasons as to why I was here...beyond journalism.

The morning found the boys cranky and deprived as usual. They were all still nervous about the concert, which was to take place the day after tomorrow. JunJin
sadly gnawed at carrot sticks while Hyesung chewed a massive wad of Nicorette.
"Uh..Hyesung...you know that you're supposed to gradually REDUCE your usage of that gum, right?" Eric asked timidly. Hyesung gave him a glare that could
melt iron.
"YES, I know that...you gonna try to STOP ME?" He growled.
Shinhwa: o_o;; no...chew away...

They all slumped into the living room (except for Dongwan, of course), to see Harumi sitting where she usually was. There was a stack of three photo albums
piled neatly on the table.
"Take a photo album and look through it, guys." Harumi chirped. "I think it's time that you learned some things about my past."
Minwoo gasped.
"I KNEW IT! I KNEW YOU WERE A PORNSTAR!"
O_o???
"These are the smutty details of your porno career, right??" He eagerly grabbed an album and started flipping through it.
Harumi chuckled softly.
"What's a porn?" Andy asked.
"Don't ask. Have a carrot stick." Grumbled JunJin.

Minwoo looked up, frowning.

"You're wearing clothes in all of these!! What kind of crappy porn career did you have?"
Dongwan heaved a huge sigh of relief.

"Minwoo, I never was a porn star..." She said, as everyone else picked up an album and began to look through it in pairs.
"WHOA!"
"You're SMOKING in all of these pictures!"

She was. The albums were full of pictures of a teenaged Harumi doing normal, everyday things...and in every one, there was a cigarette in her hand.
"Oh Harumi...I never knew..." Dongwan said softly.
She looked down at the floor, ashamed. "Yes, I know...I..."

"Uh, it's not like you broke the law or anything." Said Hyesung, wondering what the big deal was. Then he remembered that these people were CRAZY, and
CRAZY PEOPLE said CRAAAZY things, so it all made sense...

"I have to tell you my story." Harumi said, looking up at all of them with burning eyes.
Shinhwa: O_o yes...go on...

"When I was seventeen, I smoked day and night. Terrible habit. My parents had never been smokers, so they couldn't understand why I smoked so much. I
couldn't understand why I did it, either. But my grandmother's dying wish was that I quit smoking.

After she had died, I was in such a terrible state that I decided to quit right away. So my parents sent me to a special place--"

"--a mental institution?" Eric snorted, prompting other snorts from those around him.

"It was more like a...temple or a training center. That's where I met my mentor, No-Smoking-Sensei!" She took one of the photo albums and showed them a
picture of teenaged Harumi, standing next to a wizened old man. Both of them were smiling happily.

Both of them were wearing turkey costumes.

Shinhwa: O_o;;;;;;;;;;

"You see, he was the one that taught me how to quit smoking. Using the ancient, traditional, time-honored techniques that I've used on all of you--"
"You call electrocution an ANCIENT TECHNIQUE?!" Eric yelled. Harumi pretended not to hear him. She continued with her story.

"And within two weeks of his program, I never touched a cigarette again! No-Smoking-Sensei was so pleased with my progress that he wanted me to continue
the teaching the program after he had passed on. He was getting old, you know."

"Sure...insanity has a tendency to age you quickly..." Hyesung muttered. Dongwan glared at him.

"But alas...I didn't listen to him. Instead, I ran off and became...a JOURNALIST!" Harumi cried out, hiding her face in her hands. "I realized too late the
mistake that I had made, and tried to go back...but I had waited too long. No-Smoking-Sensei...he had already..." Her voice trailed off as she buried her face
deeper into her hands.
"He had already been killed by cigarettes!"

Shinhwa: *GASP*

"You mean...he was secretly a smoker!?" Andy asked, confused.

Harumi shook her head. "No...he was crushed to death by a vending machine that carried them." She sniffled loudly. "Someone...hold me..."

Minwoo and Dongwan both leaped for her at the same time, but Minwoo was closer. He flung himself into Harumi's arms as she cried ridiculously loudly,
while Dongwan sat back with a pout. He made a mental note to sit as close as possible to Harumi from now on. Perhaps she can sit on my lap...hehehe...

"So you see...*sniffle*..." Harumi said, wiping the tears from her eyes and looking out at all of rest of the stunned guys, "That's why I took this job, so that I
could carry on No-Smoking-Sensei's legacy."

"Oh Harumi, that's so noble!" Hyesung said, wiping away his own tears. *A/N: Hyesung's a little over-emotional...*
"Oh Hyesung...I'm so glad you understand..."
"Oh Harumi!"
"Oh Hyesung!"

Dongwan pretended he didn't hear that.

Minwoo tried to sneak a feel on Harumi's chest, but she was moving around too much for it to be subtle.

Eric rolled his eyes and left.

Andy made a mental note to look up this strange word "porn" on the internet.

JunJin ate another carrot stick.

Day 19

One last adventure before my time is up...

It was a cold, gloomy day. Thick mist in the air hung like grey curtains. Rain was on the verge of coming, but held itself back until the time was right.

Harumi was writing up her column and fantasizing about Dongwan's hot body when she heard Shinhwa come into the house, back from concert rehearsals.

"You did a good job today, Jin...your elephant-like panting was in synch with the music, at least..."
"SHUT UP before I shove a carrot stick up your ass, Minwoo."
"Minwoo would probably like that, actually."
"Don't say the a-word!"
"AAAANDY..."
"Oh, that's right!" Andy suddenly yelled out.
"I gotta go look up porn on the net!" He bounded up the stairs excitedly, grinning like a little boy.

Eric, JunJin, Minwoo, Hyesung and Dongwan exchanged very worried glances.
"We should stop him." Said JunJin.
They all nodded.
"It'll be too much for him." Dongwan added.
They all nodded again, except for Hyesung.
"But wait...maybe this'll be good for him." He offered.

Now it was Hyesung that got the suspicious look.

"Explain?" Said Eric.

"Well...he does need to know about this stuff sometime...and his whole purity act has been really, REALLY annoying lately..."
They all thought about this, and started to nod slowly with understanding.
"Plus, it probably would be really funny to see how he reacts." Minwoo said thoughtfully.
Their discussion was interrupted by Andy's blood-curdling, little-girl scream from upstairs.

"OH MY GOD! GOD IN HEAVEN! SAVE ME!!! SAVE MEEEE!!"

Shinhwa: O_O UH-OH.

All five of them jammed into the staircase at once, pushing each other out of the way to get to his room first. Dongwan got there first, as he was the one that
never smoked and therefore had the healthiest lungs. Flinging open the door of Andy's bedroom with the other guys in close pursuit, he saw Andy sitting at his
computer with his hands clasped to his mouth, eyes bigger than frying pans.

"Look!! look at this!" He said to everyone, pointing at the screen.

"Andy...you should turn away your eyes while they're still pure...save your purity!" JunJin warned, wondering if he could go to prison for this.
"What are you talking about?" Andy asked. He turned the monitor towards his doorway, where the five guys tried not to look eagerly at the screen.
*porn+guys=...*

A little blue teddy bear was licking a lollipop and blowing kisses at the screen. A message written in flowing blue script below it read "TO ANDY, MY
FAVORITE SHINHWA MEMBER!". There was some tinkly children's music playing in the background.

"Some fan sent me this card! isn't it SO ADORABLE!" Andy squealed happily. "I just about DIED, it was so cute!"

JunJin, Minwoo, Eric, Hyesung and Dongwan all exhaled deep breaths of relief.

"And now, porn!" Andy cheerfully said, going to yahoo.co.kr and typing "porn" into the search box.

Shinhwa: NOOO!
Minwoo: heehee...

"What are you all yelling about?" Harumi asked, walking into the hallway with her notebook in hand. Dongwan, wishing to shield her away from this pit of
corruption, tried to pass it off as if nothing was happening.
"Yelling? who's yelling? I'm not yell--"
"Andy's looking up porn for the first time! :D" Interrupted Minwoo, totally blowing Dongwan's cover. Harumi's jaw dropped.
"...this I gotta see!" She pushed her way through the others that were blocking the doorway, getting a front row seat from the other chair in his room.

Minwoo knelt down at the computer next to him and pointed at the links that showed up as a result of his search (sites found: 191,000,000,000,000,000).
"Ooh click on this one! it has lesbians!"
"What's a lesbian?"
Dongwan and JunJin tried to bust in and wrestle Andy out of the chair at that line, but Eric held them back and shook his head.
"He's gotta learn, guys...he's gotta learn..."

"Wow, it's raining really hard." Harumi commented, looking out the window and seeing everything go from dry to drenched within the span of three seconds.

"Huh, would you look at that..." The guys all said, crowding to the window to see with their attention totally diverted. Another blood-curdling scream from
Andy made them all turn back to the computer.

"WHAT--WHAT IS..." Andy was pressed against the opposite wall, as if flung across the room by unseen forces and held there. His eyes were glued to the
computer screen, which displayed naked women doing...well...

Everyone was too stunned to react. They just stared at him.

Minwoo stared at the screen, thinking about cigarettes.

"Why..why isn't the lady wearing any clothes...and why is she...with the other lady...and what is that...ohhh..." His eyes rolled up in his head and he fell to the
floor in a dead faint.

*WHUMP*

"WE KILLED HIM!" Harumi screamed, running over to Andy and shaking him by the shoulders.
"Ahh, all in a day's work..." Minwoo grinned, cracking his knuckles. He was about to get into the chair and keep surfing, but JunJin stopped him with a hand on
his shoulder and very well-intentioned glare.

Harumi, Dongwan, Eric and Hyesung all tried to revive him.

"Maybe we should just leave him here." Hyesung suggested.
"What good would that do?" Asked Eric.
"Maybe he'd think it was all a dream?"

"He's gonna have some good dreams tonight!" Minwoo cackled.

"MINWOO..."
"What?"

Andy's eyelids started to flutter, and he slowly regained consciousness.

"Wha..."
"Hi!" Harumi said loudly, trying to wake him up.

At that exact moment, lightning flashed and the all the lights in the house went out. Andy's computer exploded internally from the sudden power outage, frying
out the electronics and filling the room with a burned-out stench. The entire house was plunged into darkness.

Minwoo: HEY! GIMME BACK MY PORN!

Eric: Aw hell naw...a nigga can't get no breaks in dis world...
JunJin: :( now all of the food in the fridge will go bad...oh well, guess I'll have to eat it before it does...hehe...
Dongwan: Wonder if Harumi is afraid of the dark and needs someone to watch over her tonight...
Hyesung: wow, even his computer was so innocent that it had to faint!
Harumi: maybe I'll light some candles...how romantic, no?

"It's God's way of punishing me." Andy whispered before fainting again.

Day 20 *part one--too long to post in one sitting*

What an exciting night!! I wish it had never come to an end!

At last, they day of the concert had come.

With the help of his carrot sticks, JunJin had managed to shed the extra poundage. Now it only took some makeup to cover up his orange-toned skin, and he
was back to normal. Well, normal looking at least. He still ached for the occasional cigarette with all of his soul. Eric was feeling the same way, craving the
smoke that would soothe his nerves. All of the Shinhwa members were nervous about this concert, worried because it was their first performance since the
program with Harumi had begun.

Backstage: One hour before show time.

"YES!" Harumi was yelling into her cellular phone, startling everyone. "DAMMIT, ALL OF YOU GET YOUR ASSES DOWN HERE NOW!!"

Shinhwa exchanged worried glances.

"I've...NEVER heard Harumi swear before!!" JunJin said, wondering if that was a very bad omen for tonight.
I like girls who swear...makes 'em dirty...Minwoo cackled to himself.

Harumi looked up and saw everyone staring at her. She broke into her usual smile and waved them away.

"Nothing you have to worry yourselves about, guys...go back to what you were doing!"

So they did, which was basically pacing around while wringing their hands.

Eric wanted a smoke.

JunJin wanted a smoke and chocolate cake.

Hyesung was about to start thinking about how much he wanted a smoke, a shot of Tequila and some more Nicorette, when Dongwan suddenly grabbed him
around the collar and pulled him into one of the empty dressing rooms nearby.
"HEY!! LEMME GO!" Hyesung yelled.
Dongwan shook his head stubbornly.
"I gotta practice my lines on someone." He said, looking out into the empty hallway and carefully closing the door behind him.
"Your lines? LINES? WE HAVE LINES?! NO ONE TOLD ME ABOUT LINES! THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! NO ONE TELLS ME ANY--"
"Would you calm down?! I'm gonna tell Harumi about my feelings tonight!" Dongwan hissed, trying to shut up Hyesung before he had a stroke. He pulled a
small black box out of his pocket and opened it for Hyesung to see.
"Oooh! sparkly!" Hyesung gasped, his eyes growing huge at the sight of a gold and diamond ring.
Dongwan smiled. "I thought you'd approve. Ok, here's what I'm gonna do...no, wait...that's not a good idea...oh man...dammit...I thought I had it all planned
out...ok, ok, new plan! Right! ok! I'm the man! yes!"
Hyesung: O_o

Dongwan had a tendency to jabber on when he was excited about something.

"And somehow...I'm involved in this? You seem to be having a great conversation with yourself." Hyesung remarked coolly.

Dongwan looked up, remembering that Hyesung was still in the room.
"Oh, right! you! ok, you're gonna be Harumi and I'm gonna be Dongwan. You stand over there--" He pushed Hyesung into a corner, where he stood in a dazed
confusion--"and I'll be right here. OK, here we go." He cleared his throat and cracked his knuckles, preparing himself for what he'd say to Harumi.

Dongwan: *ahem*

"Harumi, I know we've only known each other a short time, but I've really grown very fond of you in these past few weeks and was wondering if you'd--"
Hyesung: I think I'm gonna puke.
Dongwan stomped his foot and pouted at Hyesung.
"Harumiii, you're not cooperating!"
"Not if you're gonna say mushy crap like THAT! Just gimme that ring!"
"I haven't given it to you yet! You don't know about the ring!" Dongwan argued, exasperated.
"No wonder we aren't lovers. You cheap ass." Hyesung said, crossing his arms and looking away.
Dongwan dug his nails into his palms.
"OK. We'll try another approach. Harumi, I'd like to..."

30 minutes before show time:

"Uhh...guys?" Andy said, half-running back to where everyone else was hanging out.
Hyesung and Dongwan were nowhere to be found.
Eric was blasting Wu Tang Clan over his headphones, trying to get into his ghetto mode.
JunJin was using a thigh-master for some last-minute toning.
Minwoo was flirting with his hairstylist, who giggled too much and nearly poked his eye out with a hairbrush.
Harumi was still on her cellphone, being mysterious. She wasn't yelling at the moment, but seemed to be on hold on the other end of the line. She tapped her
fingernails on her knees, very testy about something.

"Guys?" Andy repeated again, looking very nervous. No one paid him any attention--they figured he was just going to go off on another rant about purity.

"GUYS!!!" He shouted.

Everyone:O_o?

"I was just out at the stage...there...THERE ISN'T ANYONE HERE!!" Andy cried out, as everyone's jaw dropped.
"What do you mean?!"
"The whole auditorium!! it's empty!! we only have 30 minutes until we go out there, and there's NO ONE to perform for!!"

Harumi tried to bite her smile back. Her plan was working.

"Thanks. You can proceed to step two now. Good job so far." She whispered into her phone, hanging up and walking over to JunJin and Eric. She tapped each
of them lightly on the shoulders.

"Don't believe him..." She whispered into JunJin's ear, and lifting up Eric's earphone to whisper it into his.
Each of them gave her a strange look.
"What do you mean? Why shouldn't we believe him?" Said Eric, suspicious as ever.

Harumi winked at Andy, who "discreetly" gave her a big wink back.

"You'll see. Go on out there and look for yourselves." She said with a little giggle.

They both shook their heads.

"No way are we going alone. God knows what she's up to now. We go out, the rest of you guys are coming too. Where's Dongwan and Hyesung, anyway?" Eric
said, looking around.

"I think I saw them in one of the dressing rooms over there...I'll go check." JunJin offered, putting away his thigh master and getting up.

He walked down the hallway, knocking on door after door. No answer.

"Hmm..."
He thought that he had done them all, when he heard Dongwan's voice shouting from the last room.

"I WANT TO BE MORE THAN JUST FRIENDS!"

JunJin: O_O????

And then, to JunJin's utter heart-attack, Hyesung's reply...

"OH DONGWAN! OF COURSE I'LL MARRY YOU! LET'S RUN AWAY TOGETHER, TONIGHT!! WE'LL ELOPE!!"

JunJin: O_O Oh my god...it's finally happened...Dongwan and Hyesung are...GAY!?

He ran back to the other guys, giggling like a little boy.

"There, is THAT the answer you wanted?" Hyesung snapped, annoyed at the fact that he was being forced to role-play Harumi's part.
Dongwan thought for a minute. "Well...I'm not sure if I'm ready for marriage yet..."
O_O "I WASN'T BEING SERIOUS!!" Hyesung yelled, panicking.
Dongwan and Harumi...married?!

JunJin skipped merrily down the hallway, giggling to himself.

They do make a cute couple...oh my god, what am I saying?! What's Lee Sooman going to say about this!? he's going to CASTRATE them!!

oh that's right, I was supposed to go back and get them...he realized, turning around and going back to the dressing room.

*knock knock* "Hey! I guess the concert's starting early, so we need to all get out there on stage!" JunJin called out through the door. He heard frantic shuffling
inside and tried to push the dirty images out of his head...he hoped that he hadn't caught them in the middle of some steamy yaoi-licious scene. To his total
relief, Dongwan opened the door fully clothed, with Hyesung also fully clothed. But the blush that they both wore across their faces...

"Ok, thanks for telling us. Come on, hyung." Dongwan said, grabbing Hyesung's wrist and making JunJin's jaw drop.
I never realized before how open they are about it!

"Jin, what are you giggling at?" Hyesung asked suspiciously, as they walked down the hall.
"Oh, nothing...hehe...your secret is safe with me." He said with a smirk.
O_o??
"How did you find out?!" Dongwan and Hyesung both yelled at him, thinking that he knew about Dongwan's crush on Harumi. Jin giggled again.
"It's SO obvious. Really, I'm amazed that no one figured it out before. Heehee."
Dongwan: ^^;;;;;;..well....

...Ten Minutes Before Showtime...

They all stood together on the huge, empty stage, gawking with disbelief at the empty seats in front of them. The concert hall should have been packed from
floor to ceiling with screaming fans.

"...I...I don't get it!!!" Minwoo yelled suddenly. The place was so empty that his words echoed through the auditorium.
"This IS the right day of the concert, right?" JunJin asked, scratching his head.
Eric glared at Harumi, who was chatting on her cellphone again.
"What's dis shiet u b pullin' on me 'n mah homeboys, beetch?"
Harumi looked up from her phone call with a twinkle in her eye. Putting her finger to her lips, she gave Eric a "hush" sign and winked at him.

"OK! GO! NOW!" She yelled into her phone, and hung it up.

Shinhwa: O_O

All of the lights in the theater suddenly went out, plunging the huge room into darkness.

The entrance doors on all three sides of the auditorium slammed open, letting forth a huge rush of people inside as if a damn had burst. They marched down the
aisle and to the stage, carrying glowing cigarette lighters over their heads and waving them back and forth. As the crowd became illuminated with what looked
like a tiny thousand fireflies, the Shinhwa concert mantra came floating up into the air:

"SHINHWA JJANG!! SHINHWA JJANG!! SHINHWA JJANG!! SHINHWA JJANG!!"

Shinhwa: O_O WHAT THE HELL!?

Harumi and Andy: :D

Those who weren't carrying lighters waved homemade signs above their heads. They read things like:

"BUTT OUT!"
"SHINHWA SARANG! NO MORE SMOKING!"

And various other anti-tobacco slogans.

Six spotlights hit the stage, each one targeting a member of Shinhwa. They all swung around to gape at Harumi, who was beaming like a lighthouse.

"You--YOU did all of this?!" Dongwan gasped, impressed beyond words. She nodded happily, as they were each handed microphones to address the crowd
with.
"Yep! I didn't pass all of those flyers out for nothing, you know!"

"SHINHWA JJANG!! SHINHWA JJANG!! SHINHWA JJANG!! SHINHWA JJANG!!" The fans screamed.

Harumi strode into the main spotlight, waving at the crowd like a little kid.

"HIIII!! Thank you all so much for coming to support Shinhwa and their decision to stop smoking!!" She cheered, as the crowd got even louder.

The guys stood back, numbly taking in all that was going on.

The very front row was reserved for Harumi's most special of helpers: Glori, Dahye and Stephanie.

Glori was trying to climb on top of the tall person next to her for a better view of the guys onstage.

Dahye was being held back by a security guard in all attempts to keep her from rushing the stage and attacking Minwoo.

Stephanie carried a sign over her head that said "SHINHWA MADE ME FAIL CHEMISTRY. THANKS A FREAKIN' BUNCH, GUYS", although she looked
very excited to be there.

"Well guys...what do you have to say?" Harumi asked Shinhwa sweetly.

Hyesung was sobbing, like usual. A thousand "aww"'s filled the room.

"Oh GAWD...there he goes again...he's like a damn fountain!!" Eric and Minwoo grumbled together.
*sniffle*"I can't believe...that you all would care about us so much..." Hyesung gasped, wiping away his tears. "That you would really be so passionate about
our health and everything...*SOB*..."
"There, there..." Harumi said, putting her arm around Hyesung.

"SHINHWA JJANG!! SHINHWA JJANG!! SHINHWA JJANG!!"

JunJin and Eric sighed sadly into their microphones, knowing what they had to do now.

"You know, Eric--" Jin began, forcing the words out, "Our fans do mean a lot to us. I guess...I guess that we should quit smoking, for them..."

They both became choked up, although not for the same reasons as Hyesung.

"Yeah...ok man...we'll quit for good." Eric finished for him.

The crowd volume rose to eardrum-shattering screams of happiness, as the guys all hugged and threw kisses at the audience.
Harumi wiped away her own tears, fanning herself.
"I really am so proud of all of you..." She managed to squeak into her microphone. Dongwan looked up at her with love-filled eyes. Now was the perfect time
to act. Seize the moment, Dongwan!! he cheered himself on inside his head.

"Now let's get this show ON THE ROAD!" Minwoo announced to the audience, raising the energy even more. Dongwan's face fell as Harumi smiled and
started to walk offstage. No! not yet!

"Haurmi!! WAIT!!" He yelled, booming across the concert hall. She stopped and turned around, blushing at the sound of his voice. The crowd started to hush
down, wondering what he was about to do.

Hyesung: O.O;;;; oh no...no way...not here...

"Harumi!" Dongwan announced with his trademark white smile. "I have something to tell you!"

She suddenly looked very bashful, up there in front of a thousand people like this. But he looked so handsome in front of her, with his twinkling eyes and great
clothes, that she just wanted to stand up there and look at him for hours.

"Y-yes?" Harumi asked timidly. Dongwan took a deep breath and reached out to take her hand.

"I...I...have something to tell you..."

"Yes?" She asked him again, getting giddy over the way his hand touched hers.
"I'm..."

Shinhwa: O_o what's going on...??

"I'm..." Dongwan had forgotten everything that he had planned to say.

"HE'S IN LOVE WITH YOU, DAMMIT!" Hyesung burst out impatiently, busting their love-bubble.

Crowd: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHH!!!!!!
SHINHWA *esp. JunJin*: O_O WTF?!

Harumi's eyes flew open wide.

"OH DONGWAN! I LOVE YOU TOO!!" She shouted.
Dongwan's jaw hit the floor.
"You do!?"
"YES! Now kiss me before I hurt you!!"
OK!

Harumi jumped ecstatically into Dongwan's arms, where he swung her around and planted an extremely X-rated kiss on her lips. Romantic music started
playing out of nowhere. The crowd was at near-riot level during this point.

So does this mean no more boobietime? Minwoo wondered.

JunJin and Eric collapsed in a dead faint.

Hyesung and Andy wiped away tears of emotion over the happy couple.

...Backstage, after the concert...

"Well, for this being the most FUCKING SURREAL NIGHT OF MY LIFE...I think we did a pretty good job out there." JunJin beamed, slapping the guys
high-fives all around. They cheered happily, and Dongwan held Harumi close.

"So you lived up to No-Smoking-Sensei's legacy, Harumi. You did it, we've all quit smoking forever." Hyesung said with a bashful smile.
She nodded with a grin. "You've also given a great story for my column at SODAPOP, too! This will be a huge hit, I just know it!"

"Just remember to spell our names right..." Remarked a sexy, low voice from the other side of the room.

Everyone turned to see Dr. Mai Vang and Aarthi standing in the doorway, smiling coolly.

"AAAH!!!" Eric screamed, hiding behind a couch at the sight of Aarthi's stun-gun, which sat in a newly-designed holster at her waist.
"Oh Eric...I missed you too." Aarthi sighed.

Minwoo's mind reeled at the sight of Dr. Vang. Just looking at her made him feel like...like he wanted to...

"Hi, everyone!" She announced, as the all welcomed her in and started the usual backstage schmoozing. Minwoo stood a little was away from the crowd, just
staring at her with hungry eyes. He didn't understand why he felt this way...ok, so he got horny over every woman...but still...

Dr. Vang knew exactly what she was doing. And she wanted Minwoo tonight.

"You might be cured of smoking, but I'm not...mind if I light one up?" She asked, pulling a pack of Luckys out of her purse and making sure that Minwoo saw
it.
Minwoo: O_O hommina hommina hommina hommina...

She flicked the little wheel on her lighter and lit the cigarette. Taking half a drag, she blew the smoke out and winked at Minwoo.

"How is that therapy session holding up?" She asked him sweetly.

Minwoo: YOU. ME. CLOSET. NOW.

Without words, Minwoo grabbed Dr. Vang by the hand and dragged her away, the both of them giggling like mad.

...Later that evening...

"OH DONGWAN!"
"OH HARUMI!"
"OH, DONGWAN!"
"Oh, HARUMI!"

The screams and moans of pleasure filled every corner of the house from Dongwan's bedroom.

"OH DONGWAN!"
"OH HARUMI!"
"OH DONGWAN!"
"OH HARUMI!"

"OH, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD...MAKE IT STOP!!" Hyesung groaned, trying to smother out the sounds with a pillow over his head.
JunJin was eating chocolate again.
"What's that slamming sound I keep hearing?"
"It's the sound of a headboard hitting the wall over and over again..." Eric sighed. "I once knew that sound very well..."
"What are you all doing in MY ROOM?!" Andy growled angrily, wanting to get some sleep.
"Your room is the farthest away from Dongwan's. Duh!" Minwoo said.
JunJin scratched his head.
"Shouldn't you be doing the same thing with Dr. Vang right now?" He asked.
Minwoo: TTT_TTT I can't see her again until Saturday...gimme some of that chocolate!!" He roared, jumping on top of JunJin in attempts to steal his candy.
"HEY!! NO TOUCHY MY CANDY!!"
"MINE!"
"MINE!"
"MINE!"

"ARRGHHH...I'm going to go sleep in the living room..." Andy muttered, picking up his teddy bear and a blanket and tromping downstairs. Having to pass by
Dongwan's room, he plugged his ears in order to preserve any remaining shreds of innocence.
Day 21.

The birds sang in the trees outside the window to welcome the morning, as Harumi slowly began to wake up in Dongwan's arms.
"Mmm..." Dongwan yawned as she kissed his shoulders. They smiled bashfully at each other and snuggled close together.
"Let's just stay in bed all day." He suggested.
Harumi's smile turned very sad and she sat up, crossing her arms.
"Honey, did I say something wrong?"
"Our time is up, Dongwan. I have to go back to Japan today." She sighed softly. Dongwan bolted up in bed.
"WHAT!? BUT WE JUST..."
"I know we just...! but...I've got everything I need for the SODAPOP story...and the deadline's already been extended once! I can't stay here any longer, I have
my whole ca--"
Dongwan grabbed her by the shoulders and held her close to him, burying his face against her neck and shaking his head firmly.
"You aren't going anywhere."
"Dongwan!"
"We'll work something out. We aren't over yet. But one thing's for sure...you're not leaving this bed for at least another hour." He insisted, kissing her ears.
Harumi couldn't help but smile at his devotion.
Baka...babo...

Meanwhile, In Andy's room...

"Guys, WAKE UP! WAKE UP!! IT'S TODAY!! THE DAY HAS COME!!" Hyesung shouted, jumping up and down on Andy's bed and shouting at the top of
his lungs.

JunJin blearily opened one eye. "What the hell are you talking about...of course today is today...blaeahh...lemme alone..." He tried to throw his pillow at
Hyesung, but decided that it wasn't worth the loss of a pillow.

"Watchu yellin' bout, foo...shut yo head up fo' I bust one up ya ass..." grumbled Eric.

"You'd think it was Christmas morning...sheesh..." Minwoo mumbled.

Hyesung started throwing Andy's stuffed animals at them.

"IT'S DAY 21!! HARUMI'S LEAVING!!"

Jin was up within a second.

"OH SH!T! YOU'RE RIGHT!" He shouted happily, doing a little jumpy dance with Hyesung out of sheer ecstasy. He threw on the lights and ran around
kicking Minwoo and Eric until they were both awake.

"FREE AGAIN! FREE AGAIN! LA LA LA LA LA LA!" The four of them all sang, dancing around in a ring-around-the-rosie circle.

Andy walked in from his former bed in the living room, rubbing his eyes sleepily.

"What's going on?"

"HARUMI'S GOING BACK TO JAPAN TODAY! WE'RE GETTING OUR NORMAL LIVES BACK!" Eric cheered, hugging JunJin.

"But you guys aren't gonna smoke anymore...right?" Andy asked sweetly.

Minwoo, JunJin, Eric and Hyesung looked at each other uneasily.

"...Well...we have gone through a lot..."

"Yeah..."
"...and I guess this is better for our health and stuff..."
"Yeah..."
"Plus, we don't ever want her to come back..."
"HELL YEAH..."
"So I guess we're done with cigarettes forever." Said Minwoo, sounding wholy surprised at himself.
"That includes you too, RIGHT Andy?"
Andy nodded enthusiastically. "Yep! Although it was fun getting to know her..."

Minwoo, Eric, JunJin and Hyesung all cracked their knuckles menacingly at him.

...A little while later...

Harumi and Dongwan walked down the stairs hand in hand, surprised by the sight of the other guys lined up in front of the front door, huge grins across all of
their faces. Two suitcases and a box of Harumi's personal things were already packed and waiting next to the front door.

"We packed for you!" JunJin announced excitedly.

"Yep! So now you don't even have to waste time doing that! You need to catch the soonest flight to Tokyo, right?" Beamed Hyesung.
"What are you waiting for! We'll even take you to the airport!" Finished Eric.

Harumi and Dongwan exchanged surprised looks, then broke out into nervous laughter.

Eric, Hyesung, JunJin: O_o;;; why are you laughing...something's wrong...

The grins began to fade from their faces.

"That was very sweet of you, guys! it's just that...well, Dongwan and I have been doing some talking, and..." Harumi started.
"Harumi just got off the phone with her editor." Dongwan added, his smile flashing brighter than any of theirs.
Eric, Hyesung, JunJin: Oh no....
"And...I've accepted the position of Korean Entertainment Reporter! So, I'm going to be staying here in Seoul from now on...with YOU GUYS!" Harumi
grinned, jumping up and down with excitement.
Dongwan looked as if he were about to explode from happiness.
"Isn't this GREAT!! :D" He shouted, hugging Harumi.

Shinhwa: O_O no...no...

"Group hug! group hug!"

Hyesung burst into tears.

So did Eric, JunJin and Minwoo.

"Aw..." Harumi smiled. "Stop, you're going to make me cry...and we have so much time now to get to know each other better!"

They only cried harder.

"I wanna smoke..." sobbed JunJin.

Harumi pulled them all into a big group hug and sighed ecstatically.

THE END.