Home About Store Posts Community Feedback Contact

45K READERS

SimonaRich.com Know Yourself and Grow

The Big Difference between Needs and Wants Featured In:

November 21, 2015 By Simona Rich 24 Comments

Share 39 40

NEW! What You Probably Didnt

Know About Sex and Celibacy
This ebook is for people
who are celibates or are
interested in celibacy.

Needs come from the reality of this life, whilst wishes come from mental illusions. It covers not only my
Needs are natural, and therefore they dont foster addictions or imbalances of all own experiences and

sorts. Wishes are not natural, and therefore give birth to addictions, diseases, advice, but the advice of
well-known and less-known female and male
unhappiness, emptiness, disillusionment, and more.
celibates that were occultists, spiritual
teachers, writers, inventors, and more.
On the surface, running after wishes seems to do no harm; it looks like one is simply
trying to achieve some sort of happiness or comfort. Yet by running after wishes Its truly a collection of celibacy advice and
a person is investing in the illusion by reacting to mental pictures considered to hold experiences from many sources, and thats
some sort of value. why it will serve as a rich source of
inspiration and information for would-be and
current celibates. Read more.
Thats actually dangerous, despite the fact that almost everyone does it. Its
dangerous because it makes it even harder to wake up from the illusion that this
world is. How can you understand that this world is a mere dream, when you cover it
up with more and more dreams? Buddhas Meditation: Original
Meditation Through Which
When you do so, this world indeed seems solid and real, and the suggestion that its Buddha Gained Enlightenment
just a thought-form surely seems crazy. Thats the reason many spiritual paths Whether you want to
experience much greater
require spiritual aspirants to focus on the now, or to meditate so that they stop
awareness or remove
creating further illusions that prevent them from waking up.
suppressed emotions
and other mental
Wishes dont have an inherent value impurities causing
misery, Buddha's
This constant investment in illusions creates dis-illusion-ment, since illusions are
Meditation is a right
devoid of any intelligence and are empty. So all the hopes of getting some sort of choice.
lasting value from an achieved desire cannot come true.
It will help you to know yourself and this
This also applies to the wishes that are to do with people, because wishes as reality; its up to you how far you want this
wisdom to unfold.
such always involve a human form (body) and therefore are illusory as well. Whats
more, when one fantasizes of being in a relationship and finally it happens, usually Practicing this meditation will cause your
take on life to ease up, and you will be able
she gets into the relationship with her idea about a person, and not the person
to understand the essence of events in your
himself. This must create misery and loneliness. Actually, many couples dont really
life, because youll stop projecting your
see each other as they are they see their ideas about each other.
subjective view. Instead, you will let the
situation reveal itself as it is.Read more...
Needs are totally different from wants
According to Brothers in Omananda Puris writings, you should never indulge in
wants, but only in needs, if you want all suffering to end. You need to eat, sleep,
buy food, prepare meals, make money, clean home. Theres also a hearts need to
help others, share love, share your talents and be free. When your clothes are torn,
a natural need arises to replace them with new ones, and when you wake up, theres
a natural need to take a shower.

These are normal needs and therefore they dont lead to further illusions eventually
causing disillusionment. They arent formed in your mind and then acted on; instead,
they come as a result of some new event or state (like hunger, a torn piece of
clothing, the state of tiredness) which asks you to take a particular action.

Its easy to fool yourself about whether youre going after needs, or mere wishes.
Unless you really want to understand the truth and be rooted in reality, you may be
tempted to distort the border separating needs and wants. Theres nothing that can
be done about such lying to oneself when one truly wants to be permanently
happy, all such truth distortions will cease.

Searching for happiness in wishes

Ive noticed that in the Western world people invest in wishes more than people
from developing countries. Since their needs are covered, they think of further ways
to introduce variation and interest in their lives. But thats a wrong way to go about it,
since any such investment shows the belief that happiness lies outside, and so it
must create misery.

The belief that fulfilling certain wishes will make one happy keeps almost everyone
slaves to this illusion. Most people just cant wake up to realize that since no
previously achieved wishes made them permanently happy, that wont happen
with fulfilling current wishes either. This is such an obvious lesson that to find
happiness one mustnt look outside, as real happiness can only be found within!

Investing in wishes strongly affirms your focus on the external, and shows that you
dont know the riches that you hold within. And those riches will surely remain
unknown if you believe that something outside of you has some sort of value, and
you take action to get it. Inner riches gradually show their heavenly beauty
and luxuriance only to those who realize that running after wishes cant bring
happiness, and in despair or inspiration turn within.

Wishes keep you focused on the future, and thus uproot you from the only moment
that exists now. They make you lost in mental fantasies and disconnect you from
reality. This with time gives birth to the feeling of emptiness and isolation, and
though some may consider themselves special because of all the wishes that they
achieved, loneliness and the feeling that somethings missing will always remain.

Wishes make your life unnecessarily complex, because they always give birth to
more wishes and make you falsely believe that the fulfillment of that one future wish
will surely make you happy at last. When such fulfilled wishes yet again fail to
permanently satisfy, this leads to frustration and unhappiness. So this crazy wheel of
illusion keeps spinning, profiting the economy but limiting human freedom, with only
a few becoming awake enough to leave such a crazy race to nowhere.
Reversed hierarchy of needs and wishes
In Western society I see some people who ignore needs, but indulge in wishes.
These are the people, for example, who deny nutrition to their bodies and instead
eat junk which excites their palate; or people who slave for some company in order
to maintain the lifestyle based on wishes (TV, new car, etc.) but ignore the hearts
need to be free and to find the purpose of life.

The media has surely played a major part in turning this hierarchy of needs and
wishes upside down. The reason people think that running after fancies is normal
and actually important, is because they see shiny trinkets and unnecessary
experiences advertised on TV and shown in movies, and its a well-known
psychology fact that if youre continually exposed to something, youll eventually
begin to accept it.

The media created an alternative reality for us, an illusion within an illusion, which is
basically about slaving to earn money to buy stuff we dont need. How long will
we buy into it? When do we wake up to reclaim our freedom?

Lastly
Lets go back to only paying attention to our needs. Wishes only take us further into
illusion. They will never permanently fulfill, no matter how showy the outer garb of a
particular wish is. For a healthy mind and body, only needs should be satisfied, and
nothing more.

Such a simple life will allow us to behold our forgotten Divine nature, because no
fake coverings of glittery wishes will obscure it from us. Then we will no longer
try prove our worth by getting new stuff to impress others with; we will simply let the
Divine express itself through us, showing to the world that this is the true happiness
and abundance which has nothing in common with the showy trinkets of the world.

Print - Donate - Share 39 40

Comments

logen says:
November 23, 2015 at 10:09 pm

Hi Simona,
Thank you for the great post. I was empty for few days. A bit lost, i have the precise
answer that i was looking from your inner wisdom today. It open a lot about my needs and
wants clearly. Sree Ganeshaya Namaha.

Josh says:
November 23, 2015 at 1:50 pm

Dear Simona,

Giving up wishes and wants might seem threatening initially, but I think that this fearful
reaction is due to incorrect expectations about what happens when a person starts
following needs alone. As you mentioned, some people fear that following needs (instead
of wishes) leads to a loss of individuality and personality, and that their lives will become
simple and drab. But thats not at all the case. You pointed out that needs include things
like making money, sharing talents, and helping others. There are countless ways to do
those things, and each person has a unique essence, that, if allowed to express freely, will
manifest a harmonious reality that is more fulfilling than the mind can imagine. I think that
people make the mistake of equating the idea of needs with the bodys biological needs
(safety, food, reproduction), but we are body, mind, and spirit each aspect has needs
and will let you know what they are. I think that building awareness (simply by being
conscious of what arises in your inner/outer life) goes a long way toward being able to
listen to what the body-mind-spirit have to say. One of my challenges now is to listen to
what arises naturally and be trusting of this guidance above the more narrow viewpoint of
the ego.

Simona Rich says:

November 24, 2015 at 7:44 am

You probably cant imagine, Josh, how happy I was to see your comment!
You understood my post perfectly! Most people didnt. And amen to this but I think
that this fearful reaction is due to incorrect expectations about what happens when a
person starts following needs alone.

Josh says:
November 24, 2015 at 10:35 am

Very happy to hear that, Simona! It is a nice confirmation that I am

growing in my understanding.

Tina says:
November 24, 2015 at 3:03 pm

Hi Josh,

Thanks for this comment because you exactly hit upon a stuggle point Ive had. I still
pursue some wishes that Im afraid to let go of and when I think about why I dont
want to let go of these wishes, its based on fear of not being the provider and
individual that others expect me to be (and really that I also expect of myself).

You struck a chord with me when you wrote, As you mentioned, some people fear that
following needs (instead of wishes) leads to a loss of individuality and personality, and
that their lives will become simple and drab.

In case it helps anyone else, a prayer I use consistently to help me overcome this is
Not my will, Lord, but Thy will, done in and through me.

Josh says:
November 25, 2015 at 11:11 am

Hi Tina,

I think that fears related to being unable to provide are pretty common. Ive come
to see that these fears (which I still have sometimes) are conditioned by society,
which is basically putting forth the message that we all need to conform to a certain
way of living to be successful. Rather than fight against the fears, Ive found that the
way to deal with fearful feelings and thoughts is to allow them to enter my
awareness fully. I try not to ignore/suppress them, but I also dont argue against
them either. I just let them have their movement in my awareness. This can be an
intense experience because the fears might have a lot of momentum due to years
of being suppressed/fought, but with time the intensity starts to diminish.
Suppressing or fighting against the fears internally will only lead to the fears being
reflected externally. The external reflection of a fearful mind is the experience of
lack. Just wanted to share some of my thoughts on this in case they might be
helpful.

Ryan says:
November 22, 2015 at 1:51 pm

Yet again, Ive read one of your posts at a crucial moment in my life.

Its a truly beautifully written post that resonated with me, to the point where I felt
emotional half way through.
Im on day 16 of your 31 days to productivity ebook and have found that Im more
productive than ever and that I have a clear vision and goal in mind. But while applying my
productivity to updating my own website, I find that my motivation suddenly lacks which
you describe as my inner self warning me that Im not on the right path.

Youre post has shown me that I need to find the right path before I can succeed. Its been
playing on my mind a lot recently to also purchase your book on meditation which will
help, so thats the next step.

The thing is, my burning desire to leave my job and work for myself is so great that this
breaking point is fuelling my drive for financial and time freedom. Then I read this and
realise its just another want that wouldnt make sense chasing when you havent found
your true purpose. I think its time to fine tune my goals and make finding my true purpose
the goal

I hope Ive also helped someone out in a similar situation and thanks Simona for sharing
this. Question before I go thats interested me: How long did it take you to find your true
purpose?

M.Gawish says:
November 22, 2015 at 3:10 am

really, first time to think about that, it will help me organise people discussion
during live training and mutual exchange of our practices.
good article simon

fely says:
November 21, 2015 at 10:54 pm

To have dreams or wishes I think is very important and can push you even
forward into the right direction because it gives motivation which is much needed. It is how
someone goes about it. If for example a person feels good about his wish and when
meditating on it makes himself feel awesome than I say it was and is a good thing.Trust
that your wishes are already granted to you and will be given and manifested in the right
time naturally without running after them is however the key

Simona Rich says:

November 22, 2015 at 5:46 am

Yes, fely, at one stage of development it does seem so. But this stage isnt
the last one this article is for those who are passing it. Those people who still havent
achieved some desires they consider great will not understand it.

Any says:
November 21, 2015 at 4:43 pm

Hi Simona beautiful post. I feel most people go wrong when their wishes
turn into obsession. A compulsive desire to have what they want and satisfy their greed
and selfish wants. When you just simply wish for something and just let it be , I mean not
letting it effect your sanity, just keep doing your good work with utmost honesty , not
effecting your conscious, believe me universe does fulfill them. For example I do wish to
own a luxury car , I would love to have one , but at the same time I am fully content with
what I have. My inner peace , ego , happiness is no way dependent on it. I wish to get into
relationship I do want to experience it , but only if it happens. Otherwise I am happy being
single , I am in no way depressed and making unnecessary efforts to have one in my life.
We must not force our wishes on universe. Its okay to wish and leave it on universe. I
would like to share my personal experience. I really liked one bag (purse) it was totally out
of my budget. I said to myself I wish I could buy it. Than I moved on and had forgotten
about it. After few months I got msg from store that it was on 60% off. I could not believe it
and just bought it :). I hope I am being able to make my point clear
Krishna says:
November 21, 2015 at 9:05 am

I think its because we humans feel as if we have free will! We think and wish
for new things.

Do animals wish for new things ??

Sometimes I feel humans dont really have free will . Its just a feeling , nothing will work
as we really wish! If it works it just a coincidence !

Krishna

Simona Rich says:

November 21, 2015 at 9:46 am

Krishna, we have free will, but if we use it, were going against laws of
nature. When we realign our will to that of our Creator, we are in bliss. We can either
be centered in spirit or ego, love or fear. So there is a choice we live in this duality
because we wanted it. What did it give us?

fely says:
November 21, 2015 at 11:02 pm

You say that we go against nature by using our free will. Free will is
given to us from above so that we use it. We are no puppets , we do have to make
our own choice every time and every day using our free will and that was the
reason why we were created with a free will.

Simona Rich says:

November 22, 2015 at 5:52 am

Many people interpret the One Will concept fearfully. But thats
because they view it through ego, which was created to maintain separation. So
when you view the world through ego you will approve of things maintaining
separation: separate minds, separate wills, separate little lives. Yet Oneness is
what you are; youre not losing anything by uniting your will to your Creators Will
youre only gaining! How can you lose by uniting with your greater self?

allan gaskins says:

November 21, 2015 at 8:46 am

great and well said thanks

Jayne says:
November 21, 2015 at 8:31 am

This is so true! Wow.Thank you. I didnt even have to read past the first few
paragraphs for it to resonate. I equate wishes with hope. There is nothing wrong with
wishing or hoping but putting them in perspective is crucial. Needs come first. This helps
me distinguish wishes and needs.

Awesome!

Simona Rich says:

November 21, 2015 at 8:54 am

I in no way connect wishes with hopes; by wishes I mean fancies and

desires. Hope is a totally different thing, and a necessary one (that later changes to
faith), to spiritually progress and for so many more things! You cannot really do
anything without hope how can you even learn anything new, if you have no hope
that you can? How can you wake up each morning, if you have no hope that you are
 strong enough? Hope is part of our nature doubt is part of ego.

raj says:
November 21, 2015 at 7:52 am

Too good.

You have a gift of writing things and touching the base of things.

Pure logical and pure spiritual.

Jusy curious, se motivational speaker some infact ask us to visualize what we want and
say you will get it.

What you think , to live a normal happy life its imp to give up desires and wishes? And
everyone live like a saint? Is their a middle path, if yes please share thoughts on it.

Simona Rich says:

November 21, 2015 at 8:06 am

Children for some time can be very interested in building sand castles and
being far away from home. But there comes a time when they start missing their
mothers, and then they abandon the castles and run home.

raj says:
November 21, 2015 at 8:32 am

I guess ,we grown up want castle of sand and mom to also come to
beach and everything in one go.

No doubt desires are unlimited and once some one learns to tame it. Is happiest
person.

Simona Rich says:

November 21, 2015 at 8:49 am

I know that it can be hard to understand the state where youre

desire-free, yet in bliss. But be assured, this is possible. Try not to judge this
through your own experience open up to the possibility that eventually all the
toys of the world become worn and repetitive, and theres no attraction to them
at all.

Zakir says:
November 21, 2015 at 9:14 am

Indeed another top quality article from Simona!

I believe there are pure meta-physical laws in place to sustain this world. These laws
allow you to achieve/reeceive both the wishes and the needs, the laws dont care thats
why they are pure.

Rajs question about why some inspirational leaders are talking about using the laws to
receive the wishes instead of using them to achieve the needs is very interesting. I can
only guess that they are trying to convey the existence of the laws to the masses and
thats why do it in a gradual way which is easy to understand and believableone strp
at a time

Happy awakening!
Zakir

Simona Rich says:

 November 21, 2015 at 9:52 am

Yes Zakir, surely these laws exist. And it can be very empowering to use
them for some time. Until you realize no wishes will ever satisfy you fully.

Needs arent fulfilled by these laws, though. You dont need to visualize what you
need so that it be fulfilled does a cat worry about having something to eat?

If you want your needs to be properly fulfilled, leave them to God and forget about
them. Our constant preoccupation with things of lower order, such as needs (I mean
by worrying about them), makes us stuck and going against the flow of the
Universe. Life is so easy when you release your fears and just trust the Divine!

Testimonials | Store | About | Privacy | Disclaimer | G+

Partial Copyright 2015. You may copy free content of this blog providing you leave a link to this blog after each copied article.

Return to top of page