In the knotty sphere of marriage, sometimes an interloper

appears. To be sure, the trespasser had been invited in,

for no third party can encroach on a relationship without
solicitation, encouragement, or acquiescence from
someone on the inside. And this makes the assignment of
fault tricky.

All too frequently, an aggrieved wife would flail at her

husbands mistress, or a cuckolded husband would charge
at his wifes lover, never stopping to think that it takes two
to do a sizzling extramarital tango.

But the law is not as blinded by such passionate rage; the

law assigns blame equally among all the
guilty.

In the case of a two-timing husband, he and his mistress

can be jointly charged with concubinage if any of the
following is present: (1) he keeps his mistress in the house
he shares with his wife; or (2) he lives with his mistress in
any other place; or (3) he has sexual intercourse with his
mistress under scandalous circumstances.

In the case of an unfaithful wife and her lover, they can be

jointly charged with adultery.

Adultery and concubinage are criminal offenses. Anyone

found guilty of these crimes may be imprisoned.
In both cases, the aggrieved spouse cannot selectively
charge the third party alone. The complaint must include
both the unfaithful spouse and the third-party lover as
respondents.

Neither can the offended spouse file any such complaint if

he/she consented to the adultery or concubinage or
otherwise pardoned or condoned the offenders.

How can one determine if there has been pardon or

condonation?

Condonation is implied when the innocent spouse has

sexual intercourse with the guilty spouse even after
discovery of the infidelity. Such an intimate act necessarily
implies forgiveness.

Note that if the illicit lovers marry despite the subsistence

of the unfaithful spouses first marriage, such cheating
spouse may also be criminally charged with bigamy.

The mistress or lover may be included in the bigamy

charge if he/she had prior knowledge of the subsisting
marriage and still consented to be married.

Not all extramarital affairs, however, are as brazen, or

scandalous.

In the Philippines, where such affairs are common and

even accepted as fact of life, mistresses and lovers
abound. Secrecy is elevated to an art form so oblivious
spouses remain clueless and the raging affair can
continue uninterrupted.

The surprising revelation often comes only at the death of

the unfaithful spouse, when his ersatz "widow" and
illegitimate children weep before the coffin at the wake, or
serve summons on the wife to demand their share of the
inheritance, to the utter shock of relatives and friends who
shake their heads in judgment, having known the
deceased to be "morally upright" or "devoutly religious."

When an otherwise discreet affair is discovered, whether

in life or after the death of the unfaithful spouse, some
aggrieved spouses choose to turn a blind eye to keep the
peace, or to save face.

In the case of a financially dependent spouse, suffering in

silence is often the chosen recourse, for a cheating
spouse who is a breadwinner usually dominates the
marital relationship.

As long as they leave me alone, he can sleep around all

he wants, a betrayed wife would say, fearful of
repercussions at home from a husband who wields the
power of the purse.

Such wives are sadly unaware that they have a recourse

under the law, for withholding financial support is
considered economic abuse against a woman and is
actionable under the Anti-Violence Against Women And
Their Children Act (RA 9262).

Furthermore, a husband's infidelity that causes mental or

emotional suffering for his wife is considered psychological
violence and is also actionable under the same law.

But let's assume a wife knows about these remedies and

chooses to do nothing for fear of implicating her husband,
yet there is a mistress who crosses the line drawn by
decorum and discreet conduct.

What then are a wife's remedies under the law?

What if the mistress is feisty and manipulative by nature,

and feels emboldened---even justified---to poison the
marriage because the husband told her he doesnt love his
wife anymore?

What if the mistress calls or sends text messages to the

wife to taunt her about the affair, or uses the Internet to
harass the wife through indelicate messages or
comments, or posts intimate photos of herself and the
cheating husband?

What if a lover harasses a married woman and her family

because she failed to fulfill her promise that they would
run away together into the sunset and be a real couple
forever and ever?

What if he accosts the woman's husband, or creates

scandal outside her home, or forces his way inside the
house to confront her?

Does the law give an aggrieved spouse any recourse

against such a paramour yet still preserve the family?

There are many remedies under the law, depending on

the desired result.

To make a troublesome third party pay for their

indiscretion and disruptive conduct, an aggrieved spouse
may file a civil case for damages against the mistress or
lover alone (no need to include the guilty spouse).

The basis for such a complaint is Article 26 of the Civil

Code which gives the offended party a cause of action for
a third partys meddling with, or disturbing, a person's
private life or family relations.

This cause of action is commonly called "alienation of

affection." It seeks compensation for a third partys
malicious act of estranging a personfrom his/her lawfully
wedded spouse or family.

In addition to the civil case for the payment of damages,

there are several criminal cases an aggrieved spouse may
file to seek imprisonment of a troublesome mistress or
lover.

For malicious comments or posts on the Internet that tend

to dishonor or ridicule the offended spouse, a criminal
complaint for libel may be filed. If found guilty, the libelous
paramour may be imprisoned or ordered to pay a fine, or
both.

For disruptive mistresses or lovers who create public

disturbances outside the spouses' home or near the
person of the spouses or their family, a police officer may
be called to arrest the offending paramour on the spot. A
criminal complaint for alarms and scandal may thereafter
be filed against such a troublesome mistress or lover.

If a paramour should threaten the spouses or their family

(think Fatal Attraction"), a criminal complaint for grave
threats may be filed.

A charge of trespassing may also be filed if the offender

has entered the family home uninvited.

If the trespassing paramour boiled the family pet in a pot

as Glenn Close did in the movie, or otherwise harmed any
animal in the family home, an additional criminal charge
may be filed against her/him for violation of the Animal
Welfare Act (RA 8485).
If a homicidal paramour attacks anyone in the family with a
weapon, as Glenn Close did in the film (are you starting to
fear mistresses now?), he/she may be charged with either
attempted murder or attempted homicide.

But these are extreme circumstances. Let's dial it down a

little and assume the most commonly-occuring scenarios
in Filipino extramarital affairs.

If, during a confrontation, the mistress or lover speaks

harshly to the aggrieved spouse in a manner that shames
or ridicules the latter, the offender may be charged with
slander (oral defamation).

If there is spitting at the innocent spouse, or slapping, or

shoving, the charge is slander by deed.
If harder physical blows are involved, the offending
paramour may be charged with either serious, less
serious, or slight physical injuries, depending on the
injuries sustained by the offended spouse.

Even if the mistress or lover creates only minor

disturbances that merely cause annoyance, such as
calling or texting the innocent spouse, or harmlessly
stalking from a distance, a criminal charge for unjust
vexation may still be filed by the offended spouse.

If a mistress receives an allowance or fancy gifts from a

cheating husband, or if she is housed, clothed, and fed by
him, the aggrieved wife may want to test the law by filing a
criminal case of prostitution against such mistress.

Under the law, any woman who, for money or profit,

habitually indulges in sexual intercourse or lascivious
conduct is deemed to be a prostitute.

In any case, an aggrieved spouse may also file a civil

complaint to recover any real or personal property given
by his/her unfaithful spouse to a mistress or lover.

This includes houses, condo units, cars, jewelry, cash, etc.

Such properties are part of the conjugal assets and may

not be given away without the consent of both spouses.

Atty. Reeza Singzon is a trial lawyer specializing in family

law and civil law. For questions or comments, she may be
reached at reeza.singzon@gmail.com