You Dont Find Love,

You Inspire It
 Force moves the body
Persuasion moves the mind
Inspiration moves the spirit
Force can get you a physical
response
Persuasion can get you
agreement
But only inspiration ignites the
dual engines of love
To inspire a woman means.;..

(1) to (happen to) breathe life into her being

by virtue of the man you are in the world and

(2) to (consciously) breathe life into her by

virtue of the man you choose to be with her

and
To inspire a woman means

(3) to be the support/agent of her

transcending her own physical
and mental limitations, her
doubts and
self-doubts
 to transcend her cycles of
getting and spending, her
resignation, her cynicism
Context
 You Inspire Love by

(1) what you do in the World

(2) what you do in her World
(3) what you do for HER World
Each of these steps means
moving beyond stasis
 This is only for you if you want
this most vivifying level of love

and not merely

 security
a strategy of ego
social standing and expectations
attachment strategy
feeling needed
economic strategy
 How We Talk About Identity
Frames How We Talk About Love
All I Want is a Billionaire,
Bisexual, Nymphomaniac
Chef
.. (whos enlightened)
Homo Inspiratum
 Mans nature is an ever
emergent open system that
evolves in saccadic
quantum-like jumps.

- Claire W. Graves
Spiral Dynamics
 My working hypothesis

Anything less than living from your

inspired self sells your evolving
love/life short
Identity?
Or this place of identifying as a
being who at core lives as
actively inspired

so that
Your Inspired Unique Self meets and inspires
your partners
Inspired Unique Self
 Im Going to Argue That There
are 3 Aspects to Inspiring Love in
a Worthy Woman
Step #1
 Step #2
Inspire Her With
Your Relationship Skills
 Step #3
Support Her Expansion
into Her Inspired Life
www.AdamGilad/Inspired
 You Inspire Love by

(1) what you do in the World

(2) what you do in her World
(3) what you do for HER World
 Category #1

In The World

The Inspired Man

Inspires Love
by Living an Inspired Life

(* EDGE beyond mental filters)

1: Physical mastery, prowess
accomplishments

2: Financial acumen, power, penetration,

success

3: Emotional connectedness and

authenticity, character

4: Intellectual power and reach/ wit

5: Social leadership, embeddedness service/ humanity

6: Sexual expression and skillset

7: Creative artistry

8: Play and Fun

9: Spiritual groundedness, practice

 Category #2

In her world

The Inspired Man

Inspires Love With
Inspiring Partnership
Skills

Applied Character
 Safety
Felt and Seen
Validated and Valued
Special and Unique
Cherished
 Category #3
For Her World
(* beyond her mental filters)
 You can inspire her into the
journey into HER unique self
 Dianne
Ive been inspired by the feeling of
being safe and looked out for. There's
nothing more sexy and inspiring that
a man who's got it handled

(Physical Competence, Relationship

Skills, Safety)
 Deb
My short answer is: His Mind. That's
typically the biggest turn on for me. It both
inspires me and excites me to BE a better me
and think bigger, be better, and reach levels I
never imagined as a little farm girl just
wanting to escape my town and travel the
world.

(Intellectual)
*opens new landscapes
 Annie:
I fell in love with Eben at Burning Man
when he was giving a talk about he
future of mankind

(Social Purpose, Intellectual,

Spiritual)
 Mariana:
His brain, his spirituality, his
commitment to his work.
Athleticism. And math skills

(mental, spiritual, financial,

intellectual)
 Samira
Passion for what he creates in the
world for the greater good this is
a contagious joy and an inspiration.
If there is a level of mastery within
the creative realm, this makes him
sexier still
(Social, Creative)
 Trez
I have been inspired by men who can be
strong, independent, respected leaders in
their community, work and family while being
tender and passionate with me. l I can respect
and honor him for his strength and feel safe
and cared for when we are together. Having
this man in my life inspires me to really step
into my beauty, grace, power, love and joy.

(Social, Partnership skills) * threshold

 Katja
Doing the Work that is "him" and of a high
integrity and impact (there is always impact if
there is purpose) to me is a huge eye catcher. I
simply adore such men as I know they Love
humanity. Obvious Masculinity is a huge one, I
personally Love Masculine Men. And the way he
treats me. If he is present, this means worlds. If
he cares to learn and grow - another big turn on.
*Character, Social, Relationship skills,
Intellectual/Emotional growth)
 Sarah
I am inspired by A. because he is
HONEST. He is so genuinely kind
and good that it feels innocent. I
can and always could see that in
his eyes, and then in his loving
nature. It inspired my trust which
#1. Then, he is fun
 Hes laid back and knows how to enjoy
himself, which helps ground me and give
some variety from my ambition and
intensity. .. He completely turned his life
around, which is what inspired me on our first
date. Hes intelligent in the way I most like:
strategic, relentless, inquisitive, objective as
hell. He inspires me because he is all these
things Ive loved in different men, rolled into
ONE! Amazes me every day.
 First Level:

(1) In The World

(2) In Her World

Most Women: Love =

Proud, Admiring +
Safe, Accepted, Valued,
Heard, Cherished
 Second Level:

The surge of freedom the ability and desire

to self-express that women experience when
they are inspired by their man
Why Do I Focus on Inspiration?

2 reasons
Anything less feels like living life
short of possibility
When its over, I want to say: all my life
I was a bride married to amazement.
I was a bridegroom, taking the world
into my arms.

When its over I dont want to wonder

if I have made of my life something
particular, and real
 I dont want to find myself sighing
and frightened

or full of argument.

I dont want to end up simply having

visited this world.

- Mary Oliver, When

Death Comes
 (2) And because I learned that
the more inspired I was, the
higher quality woman I attracted,
and the more passionately
and with more layers
they loved me
Attract Connect - Inspire
 Phase 1: Attract

Physical Realm
The Oxygen of Sex

Egobonking
 Trust
Cocky/Funny
Indifference
Status
Electric Contrast
Erotic Forward Pacing
 Kindness
Generosity
Purpose
Friendships
Passion
Empathy
Vulnerability
It gets you up to being
 1st Oxygen:
Desired, Infatuated/Physical
Face of Love
 The Transitional Trigger

From Fucking Everything that

Moves to Being Moved by
Everyone You Fuck
 Phase II: Connect

What makes you a unique voice?

With whom & how do you attach,
bond, love?
Your unique awareness
Your stories
Your unique wounds
Your unique rise from struggle and
barriers broken
This gets you to:
 The 2nd Oxygen:
Companionate or Connected Love
 The Next Trigger?

Force moves the body

Persuasion moves the mind
Inspiration moves the spirit
Inspired and Inspiring Love?
 Three Things..

(1) what you do in the World

(2) what you do in her World
(3) what you do for HER World
 Lets Now Dive Into

1st:
What Inspiration Is

2nd:
How You Can Turn it On and Up
in the world, in her world,
for her world
What is Inspiration and why
is it inherently

?
Listen as way of re-imagining
who you are at core
 [1] The Inspired Man is Free

Inspiration is the feeling of freedom

and joy from realizing that who we are
is beyond the body, and beyond all
limiting beliefs...

- John Marshall Roberts

 [2] The Inspired Man is Expansive

To be inspired is to feel vaster in

engagement with what you value
most beauty, love, your art or skill,
teaching, learning, service, mastery

more than
[3] The Inspired Man is Enraptured

Inspiration originates from neither

the body nor the rational mind. It
arises from a deeper dimension
something more like wonder
When you are inspired, you are
uniquely alive to the mystery
of Being and Becoming

Connected to grandeur
[4] The Inspired Man is Erotic

Inspiration is inherently
pleasurable connected to
the Eros of both being and
becoming
 [4] The Inspired Man is
Evolution

The Evolutionary Life Force (Love

Intelligence) in that you are
moving the species,
consciousness, creativity forward
Sustained inspiration adds constant
creative energy to a persons mental
system, which ultimately produces a
wholesale transformation of their
world-view. This process is the
ongoing basis for mankinds mental
and spiritual evolution on both a
micro (personal) and macro (global)
level - JMR
 [5] The Inspired Man is
Founded in Love (of life).

You are openness opening.

Rather than fear-founded, which
constricts
[6] The Inspired Man is Empowered

inspiration puts us back in touch

with our limitless creative potential,
and reminding us that we are each
authors of our own experience.
- JMR
[7] The Inspired Man is Dynamic

He is in action.

Inspiration grows from the soil of

action

- Business Secrets of the Trappist Monks: One CEOs Quest for Meaning and
Authenticity, August Turak
Inspiration is sustained by action
and must ultimately lead to
measurable real-world results or
it will backfire, over time
[8] The Inspired Man is Unique

Inspiration grows from, marks

and amplifies your Unique Self
 [10]: The Inspired Man is
Connected To Infinity

Inspiration Can Map Across Your

Whole Being, Making You
Alive to YOUR unique Being and
Becoming
In short, how you live as an inspired man
makes you exciting to yourself and to
her
 How do We Wake Up
Our Most Inspired Selves?
Are you Inspired and Inspiring in
THE World?
Are You Inspired and Inspiring IN
Her World?
Are You Inspired and Inspiring
FOR Her World?
[1]Physical competence or accomplishments
or prowess
[2] Financial acumen, penetration, success
[3] Emotional connectedness, authenticity
character
[4] Intellectual power and reach/ wit
[5] Social leadership, skill, service
[6] Sexual aura manner and skillset
[7] Creative artistry
[8] Play, fun
[9] Spiritual groundedness, practice
 #1:
How Can You Be Inspired in
Your Physical Life?
(1) achievement
(2) capability
(3) fitness, flexibility, endurance
(4) performance
(5) healing/recovery
(6) craft, home skills
 Inspired Sight
* To see the universe in a grain of
sand
* Scale of space and time
* We are a visual species short-
term thinking long term problems.
* Wake up to art, nature, patterns,
beauty
 Sense of Smell
Sense of Hearing
Sense of Taste
Sense of Touch

Ever refining subtlety...

 Your Body Awareness

* Breath
* Yoga
* Meditation
* Nutrition
* Connected to environment
* How You Move Through Space
* Do you feel the joy of being alive
 #2
How Can You Be More Inspired
in Your Financial Life?
 The Eros of Abundance

How can you make your will felt in

the world?
How can you create value?
How can you acquire resources?
How can you contribute?
 #3:
How Can You Be More Inspired
in Your Intellectual Life?
* How are you deepening
Mastery?
* How are you challenging your
beliefs?
* How are you refining your
distinctions?
* How are you incorporating other
perspectives (cultural, gender
etc)?
 #4
How Can You Be More Inspired
in Your Social Life?
* How are you growing, invested in
your social web as human
connection (its own value)?

* How are you growing, invested in

your social web as social
wealth?
* How are you growing, invested in
your social web as inspiration
engine?

* How are you in service

(intertwined with the active
good of others?
 #5:
How Can You Be More Inspired
in Your Emotional Life?
* Self examination, awareness,
* Honesty
* Responsive v Reactive (triggers)
* Empathic (equal agents)
* Identity
How limited your self-identity
* Multiple perspective/altitude
* Stay in the game
* Are you engaging your shadow?
* Are you engaging your wound?
* Are you engaging/bringing your
greatness?
* Are you opening into
experience or closing?
 And by doing so are you
meeting, feeling, seeing, healing
the wounds, shadows, fear,
greatness, opening and
closing of others?
 #6:
How Can You Be More Inspired
in Your Sexual Life?
* Prowess
* Presence
* Erotic Connoisseur
* 24 Hour Foreplay
* Expanding your sexuality into
life-eros
 #7:
How Can You Be More Inspired
#6

in Your Creative Life?

* The arts
* Your living environment
* Your self expression
* What havent you expressed?
 #8:
How Can You Be More Inspired
By Your Playful (Fun) Life?
* Non competitive athletics
* Humor, clowning
* Relaxation
* Conversation
 #9:
How Can You Be More Inspired
in Your Creative Life?
dco
 The thing that you wish the
person you lived with was more
of
Release from need for approval from
others
 Release from Illusion of
Separate Skin Encapsulated Ego
Release from the Need to
Control Your Environment
 If you want to inspire others,
choose to have faith in your
connection to the source of life,
and in the unity behind
appearances.
- JMR
All of these categories not as
expressions of fear ego - -
I exist and I need validation

But rather as
 an expression of
love-ego your love of being
alive and a part of the ongoing
evolutionary expression of
the Life Force
Are you Inspired and Inspiring in
THE World?
Are You Inspired and Inspiring IN
Her World?
Are You Inspired and Inspiring
FOR Her World?
What Does She Need To Feel In a
Love Relationship?
Safe Special Sexy Feminine
SAFE
(a) Physically Safe(r)
Voice
Body
Physical World
(b) Emotionally safe
With
(Vow/free attention)
Trust
Word
 (c) Inspired in Safety

How do you Occur For her?

 How to make your unique gifts,
wounds, shadows visible to connect
with and interact with her unique
gifts wounds and shadows so that
both of your gifts emerge and both
of your shadows and wounds come
into light and find healing.
Your Unique: Shadow
Fears
Voice
Self
Aspirations
Unexpressed Self
Wounds
Sexy
 Proust
Inner-Outer Connection
Infinite Praise
Special
[1] G.B. Shaw
[2] I love the way you
[3] Public Brag
[4] Love language - how does
she feel special
[5] Honored
Feminine
Are you Inspired and Inspiring in
THE World?
Are You Inspired and Inspiring IN
Her World?
Are You Inspired and Inspiring
FOR Her World?
 Basic Definition of Love:
When you care for someones
well being as much as or more
than your own...
What does it take to be able to be her riverbanks/trampoline?
Come back to Question of
Identity
Her Unique Contribution

3 Steps
 People crave inspiration, but
they usually fight like hell when
we try to inspire them
- JMR
 You Dont Find Love:
You Inspire Love by

(1) what you do in the World

(2) what you do in her World
(3) what you do for HER World
Can You teach love?
Can teach the conditions to make it flourish
How Do You Make it Flourish?
(1) Moment-by-moment Choice
(2) Moment-by-moment practice
 Love is not
a slice of the pie.
It IS the pie
 Where we had thought to travel
outward, we will come to the center
of our own existence. And where we
had thought to be alone, we will be
with all the world.

- Joseph Campbell
AdamGilad.com/Inspired