The

Introvert's
Guide
to
Self-Love

LUNA & SOL

www.lonerwolf.com
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 1.

All throughout our early lives we were

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taught how to read, how to write, how to
manipulate, calculate, mould, alter, build,
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
destroy, theorize, study and analyze life.
We were taught how to say "please" and
"thank you," as well as what was acceptable
and unacceptable to others and society at
large but most of us introverts failed to
be educated in one essential dimension of
life: self-love.

What does self-love mean for the

introvert? In short, self-love is complete
forgiveness, acceptance and respect for
who you are deep down all your beautiful
Land
U N Ahideous
& S O L parts included. When you love
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yourself you take care of yourself, you
honor your limitations, you listen to your
needs and you respect your dreams
enough to act on them. When you love
yourself, your happiness, health and
fulfillment are all of paramount
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 2.

importance because you realize that

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without loving yourself, you will never be
able to genuinely love others.
HOW TO ATTRACT YOUR
Loving yourself means honoring your
authenticity: who you are as a quiet person.

But how can you be authentically true to

who you are if you dont know what your
basic needs are?

This self-love guide is about learning how

to identify your unmet needs as an
introvert.

LUNA & SOL

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Copyright, Aletheia Luna

 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 3.

Other than the need to have alone time, the

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need to recuperate and the need to be
understood, what are your basic needs as
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
an introvert? The following activities are
designed to help you enter into a reflective
mindset that will help you better
understand the person you are and what
is lacking the most in your life. Although it
might be tempting to simply skim through
these exercises, I really encourage you to
get a pen and paper or anything else that
will help you to record your fundamental
needs. This often proves to be an essential
part of the process of self-discovery.

LExercise
U N A & S1OL Physiological and Safety
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Needs

Why have I grouped up these two types of

needs together? Mainly because
physiological and safety needs form the
most elementary requirements of
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 4.

humanity. Please go over the list below and

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carefully consider which of these needs
arent being met or satisfied in your life
H O W T
right now.O A T T R A C T Y O U R

1. Receiving enough sleep (7-8 hours a

night).
2. Eating clean, abundant and varied food.
3. Breathing unpolluted and fresh air each
day.
4. Drinking clean and fresh water every
day.
5. Living in a safe house and/or
neighborhood.
6. Having financial security. 7. Being
Lprotected
U N A & S Oagainst
L physical or emotional
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violence.
8. Living or working in an environment
that is free from toxins and pollution.
9. Having a stable house or home to live in.
10. Eating healthy, nutritionally beneficial
food each day.
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 5.

After you have taken the time to note down

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any of these needs that arent being met in
your life, I would like you to ask yourself
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
the following question for each unmet
need you identified: What do I plan to do
in the next month to better meet this
need?
Think about the answer to this question
very carefully and take as much time as
you need. Remember, you dont need to
come up with a definite solution for every
unmet area of your life. It is unrealistic to
expect that you will have a quick fix for
every unfulfilled need that you have,
however, do your best to explore what is
Lreasonably
U N A & S O Lwithin your power to change,
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or improve on, in the near future.

Helpful Note: When I did this exercise I was

shocked by how many poor habits Id got into
throughout my life. I discovered that I
regularly only got 5 hours of sleep
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 6.

every night, rarely exercised, barely ever set

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aside time to unwind and relax, and ate a lot
of heavy and unhealthy foods. Since changing
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
these bad lifestyle choices my energy levels
have skyrocketed. Yours will too!

Exercise 2 Belongingness and Love

Needs

Please go over the list below and carefully

consider which belongingness and love
needs arent being met or satisfied in your
life right now.

1. Having meaningful relationships and

Lfriendships.
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2. Feeling accepted.
3. Feeling understood.
4. Being noticed and paid attention to.
5. Receiving respect.
6. Being listened to.
7. Having loyal and honest connections
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 7.

with others.

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8. Receiving affection.
9. Having sexual intimacy.
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
10. Having emotional intimacy with others.
11. Having spiritual intimacy with others.
12. Receiving guidance.
13. Being nurtured and taken care of.
14. Being able to express your thoughts and
feelings openly.
15. Receiving unconditional love of any
kind.

After you have identified which of the

above needs are not being satisfied in your
life, ask yourself the following question
Lagain:
U N A &What
S O L do I plan to do in the next
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month to better meet
this need? Think about the answer to this
question very carefully, then record the
answer for each unmet need you noted
down. Remember: you cant change what
other people do, but you can change what
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 8.

you do. So keep this in mind when you note

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down your answers.

H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
Helpful Note: When I did this exercise I was
surprised by how many of my basic needs
werent being met every day. Not only was I
eating a nutritionally poor diet, but I also
spent most of my days indoors, not getting
much fresh air. I was also jeopardizing my
financial security by spending obsessively and
frivolously to ease my stress. To top it off, I
lived in an emotionally unstable environment
which I later learned to deal with through
developing awareness of emotionally
manipulative behaviors, as well as developing
Lmindfulness
U N A & S O Land the skill of interpersonal
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assertiveness.

Exercise 3 Self-Esteem Needs

Please go over the list below and carefully

consider which self-esteem needs arent
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 9.

being met or satisfied in your life right

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now.

H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
1. Nurturing and taking care of yourself.
2. Liking the person you are.
3. Accepting your imperfections.
4. Identifying your needs.
5. Listening to all of your needs and
fulfilling them.
6. Having fun and enjoying life.
7. Standing up for the person you are.
8. Taking responsibility for who you are
and the decisions you make.
9. Forgiving yourself.
10. Feeling smart, knowledgeable or
Lcompetent
U N A & S O Lin some area of life.
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11. Feeling a sense of independence.
12. Making your voice heard.

Again, after you have identified which

needs arent being fulfilled in your life, ask
yourself: What do I plan to do in the next
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 10.

month to better meet this need?

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Remember, you dont need to come up
with a definite solution for every unmet
H O W T O A T T R A
area of your life. It isC T Y O U R
unrealistic to expect that you will have a
quick fix for every unfulfilled need that you
have, however, do your best to explore
what is reasonably within your power to
change, or improve on, in the near future.

Helpful Note: Most of us struggle with issues

such as feeling misunderstood, alone and
isolated. As a quiet person, you have probably
identified a number of needs that arent being
met in your life from this list. In my own case
Lfor
U NaA large
& S Opart
L of my life I had very few
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people I truly considered close friends. I was
the type of person who waited to be
friended, largely because of my quiet
nature, but also due to shyness. It was simply
a lot easier to have other people approach me.
The problem with this was that waiting for
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 11.

other people to reach out to me was not the

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best way of making friends or finding people I
truly felt closely bonded to. Eventually I
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
realized that I needed to take a large step out
of my tightly controlled introvert zone if I
ever wanted to meet these basic needs of mine
and Im glad I did! For me it was easy to
blame others for my emotionally barren life,
but eventually I owned up to the fact that I
was not only preventing the fulfilment of my
needs, but I was actually contributing to the
desolation I felt.

Exercise 4 Self-Actualization Needs

LPlease
U N A &goS O L the list below and carefully
over
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consider which self-actualization needs
arent being met or satisfied in your life
right now.

1. Achieving self-expression of your gifts

and talents.
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 12.

2. Feeling connected to a higher purpose or

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higher being.
3. Pursuing what you feel is true.
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
4. Feeling a sense of accomplishment
regarding what you have done in life.
5. Positively contributing to the lives of
others.
6. Discovering your calling or path in
life.
7. Feeling a sense of inner wholeness.
8. Physical, emotional and psychological
freedom (including freedom of speech and
expression).
9. Feeling a sense of happiness and
fulfillment with your life.
LUNA & SOL
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After you have identified which of these
important needs arent being met in your
life, ask yourself the same question as
above: What do I plan to do in the next
month to better meet this need? Record
your thoughts. Remember, you dont need
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 13.

to come up with a definite solution for

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every unmet area of your life. It is
unrealistic to expect that you will have a
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
quick fix for every unfulfilled need that you
have, however, do your best to explore
what is reasonably within your power to
change, or improve on, in the near future.

Helpful Note: In a society that emphasizes

aggressive self-promotion it is no surprise
that we, as introverts, feel completely
stigmatized and maligned. If you are making
your way with me through this book, chances
are that you feel the dark and oppressive
Lcloud
U N A of
& self-hatred
SOL hovering over you like I
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once did. You might doubt your worth, you
might discredit your abilities and perhaps
you might even be your own worst enemy like
I was. For me, self- esteem was the most
severely malnourished need in my life. For
many years I truly hated myself and the
Copyright, Aletheia Luna
 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 14.

person I was. I wanted deep down to be

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louder, funnier, more entertaining and more
gregarious. I wanted to be the life of the party
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
in every sense, but the truth was that I had so
many other gifts waiting to be unearthed,
nourished and valued. I just couldnt see it
through the thick curtain of unattainable
images and ideals I had set for myself. I know
firsthand what its like to be your own biggest
hateful and vicious enemy. Once I became
aware of the way I was treating myself
physically, emotionally and psychologically I
vowed to change. I was sick to the core of
having to live with myself. In fact, you might
feel the same right now. If so, dont despair
Lrejoice
U N A &Sbecause
OL this marks the beginning of
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your self- healing journey. We will explore
many different ways of meeting the basic need
of self-esteem throughout the rest of this
book.

Copyright, Aletheia Luna

 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 15.

Reflection

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What have you learned and discovered
H O W T O A T T R A C T Y O U R
about yourself? Uncovering your true,
unmet needs as an introvert is the
beginning of the empowering process of
self-acceptance, self-love and self-
transformation. As they say: Today is the
beginning of the rest of your life.
Now that you have discovered what needs
are not being met in your life you can work
to repair, heal and strengthen the person
you are. At last you can begin to slowly
manifest your quiet strength! But here is a
quick reality check: This process can be
Lslow
U N A &believe
S O L me! So it really helps to
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constantly review what you have recorded
in the process of reading this book to stay
on track and to identify your goals ...

Copyright, Aletheia Luna

 The Introvert's Guide to Self-Love 16.

END OF PREVIEW

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This was a preview of Aletheia Luna's book
"Quiet Strength: Embracing, Empowering
HOW TO ATTRACT YOUR
and Honoring Yourself as an Introvert."

If you would like to continue reading,

please take a look at this book in our shop.

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LUNA & SOL

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Copyright, Aletheia Luna

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