The SafetyWeb Community

Resource Packet*
www.safetyweb.com

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Contents
Teens and Depression ............................................................................. 3
Social Network Safety Tips ...................................................................... 7
National Internet Safety Month ............................................................ 13
Daddying in the Digital Age ................................................................... 20
Video Sharing ........................................................................................ 25
Cyberbullying ........................................................................................ 29
Sexting 101 ........................................................................................... 33
Internet Addiction ................................................................................. 36
Kids and Online Commerce ................................................................... 40
Online Reputation ................................................................................. 44
Teens and Mobile Phones ..................................................................... 48
Bad Online Content ............................................................................... 52
Online Friends ....................................................................................... 56
Online Photos and Videos ..................................................................... 60

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Teens and Depression

Introduction & Overview

Every adult knows that adolescence can be a challenging time for even the most well adjusted
individuals. Raising a teen, providing guidance and teaching your teen how to develop coping
tools for traditional social issues can be a daunting task all on its own. Today, parents, guardians
and caretakers of teens have the added challenge of identifying issues that stem from online
social behavior.
In this article, we will explore how to identify signs that your young adult may be depressed, or
in more advanced instances, may be suffering from suicidal tendencies. We will also provide
you with resources to help you safely intervene and provide support to your teen.

Signs of Depression & Suicidal Tendencies

A review of multiple studies has shown that people express their depression in different ways.
It may seem as though this is stating the obvious, but there has been extensive discussion in the
mental health community as to whether adults and adolescents experience and communicate
depression in different ways. It turns out that it is inconclusive: “Considering over a dozen
studies relevant to the question, Weiss and Garber concluded that the matter remains
unresolved: it is not known how depression in childhood and adolescence may differ from that
in adults.”1 However, one may be able to detect depression by observing some of the classical
signs of behavioral change, regardless of age.

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Depression and suicidal tendencies are often preceded by changes in behavior and mood. The
most easily identifiable clue may be a sudden lack of interest in activities that once brought
delight or pleasure. This lack of pleasure may be a side effect of other stressors that will be
discussed in the next section. Additional signs of depression include:
-Excessive crying or moodiness
-Feelings of guilt, sadness or hopelessness
-Persistent low self-esteem
-Easily irritated
-Sleep pattern changes: either sleeping too much or not sleeping enough
-Eating patterns change: not eating enough or over-eating
-Self-isolation
-Excessive Internet use or phone/texting
Signs of suicidal tendencies may be more pronounced and advanced than depressed behavior.
Often times with teens, depressed behavior is a pre-cursor to suicidal behavior, especially when
it is prolonged. In addition to signs of depression, suicidal behaviors and tendencies to look out
for include:
-Suicide notes
-Verbal threats of suicide
-Expressing strong feeling of being “trapped”
-Saying phrases like “Everyone would be better off without me”
-Pre-occupation with death and dying
-Final arrangements such as giving away personal belongings
-Acting recklessly as if having a death wish
-Sudden change in friends and social activities
-Sudden switch from being depressed to calm and even happy
-Self-injurious behavior
-Change in music preferences (to a darker, moodier genre)

Traditional Signs of Depression

The reasons an individual may become depressed or stay depressed are as varied as personality
types. Adolescence is a socially turbulent time for most individuals, and social stressors at home
and school during this time period provide a foundation for the most traditional causes of
depression in teens.
A sudden change in environment, like moving from one town to another, or even changing
schools can cause an interruption in a teens life rhythm and result in depression. Similarly, a
lack of structure or boundaries may contribute to a feeling of lack of direction or
accomplishment.
Poor academic performance that may be due to an undiagnosed learning disability, or self-
perception of having a low social status compared to peers are among the top causes for
depression in a school environment. A loss of self-esteem resulting from a turbulent family
environment, or a humiliating experience may also cause an episode of depression.

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Technology has its benefits of making communication and research easier, but these
advantages bring with them a unique set of challenges and additional social pressures for teens.
In addition to traditional causes of depression, there may be events that precipitate from online
(also referred to as “cyber” or “virtual”) social situations.

Causes for Depression Rooted in Cyber-Issues

There are a multitude of social networking sites available for individuals to express their
creativity and personalities. Sites like Facebook and MySpace allow teens to keep in contact
with each other, but also open teens up to criticism and cyber-bullying. The first widely
publicized case of teen suicide resulting from cyber-bullying revealed that the ‘bully’ was the
parent of a schoolmate of the girl. The case resulted in the passage of the first law making
cyber-bullying a crime.
Research has shown that depression stemming from Internet use or dependency strikes higher
in younger age groups. Is it not clear whether depression causes increased Internet use, or if
increased Internet use results in depression.
While cyber-bullying tops the list for depression issues stemming from the Internet, there are
multiple other causes including cyber-stalking, sexting, and gaming addiction. Clues to these
dysfunctions present themselves similarly; while visits to the Internet may be for different
reasons or to different sites, the behavior exhibits as excessive use.

Ways You Can Help

The best thing to do to avert major depression with your teen whether it be from traditional
causes or causes rooted in cyber issues, is to keep the lines of communication open. Between
demanding work schedules and extracurricular activities, it can be challenging to spend time
with your teen. But it is important to make time and stay in contact with your teen so that you
know what is going on in their lives and be able to detect negative changes.
It is important to educate your child about how to properly use technology and balance virtual
activities with everyday life. Sharing this kind of information early when your child is younger as
they are learning to utilize technology will help prepare them for interacting in the virtual
world.
Talk with your teen if you suspect depressive behavior. Remember that being supportive, and
listening (without lecturing), and understanding are important ways of encouraging your teen
to share their feelings. If your teen opens up to you about the issues, respect their privacy as
much as possible unless the situation is dire, in which case you should seek immediate help.

When to Get External Help

Knowing when to intervene when your child is depressed can be a sensitive situation. If you
child is persistently exhibiting any of the behaviors discussed above, you should take action.
Initiating a conversation with your teen is the best approach. If this approach is not successful,
you may consider a visit to your family doctor, professional therapist, or spiritual/religious
leader.

External Resources and Online Resources

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Net Addiction
www.netaddiction.com
Webmd
www.webmd.com/depression/guide/teen-depression
Psych Central
www.psychcentral.com/lib/2007/teenage-depression
American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry
www.aacap.org/cs/root/facts_for_families/where_to_find_help_for_your_child
Troubled Teens
www.4troubledteens.com
Your Child’s school counselor or psychiatrist
Your spiritual/religious leader
References
1 “Depression: Causes and Treatment”, Second Edition, Aaron T. Beck, M.D. and Brad A. Alford,
Ph.D.,2009
2 “Depression Guide: Teen Depression” WebMD
3 “Teen’s Suicide Spurs Anti-Cyberbullying Law” NewsFactor, Frederick Lane. November 24,
2007
4 “Internet addiction’ Linked to Depression Says Study” Mail Online, Jenny Hope. February 3,
2010
5 “HelpGuide Teen Depression: A Guide for Parents and Teachers” HelpGuide.org

Terms Associated with ‘Teens and Depression’

compulsive internet use, mood swings, manic behavior, symptoms of suicidal behavior,
depression prevention

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Social Network Safety Tips

Introduction

Children are inherently social creatures. Take one look at a playground and you’ll see young
kids interacting with one another, practicing their social skills, and learning the lay of the land.
So, it’s only natural that children would want to follow the popular trend of joining an online
social network…right? After all, their friends are doing it.
In this article, we will explore social networking websites and how children below the required
age to join are able to open accounts. We will also discuss the social networking dangers and
positive effects of social networks on young children and offer helpful tips for parents who wish
to guide their kids towards a safe direction.

Social Networks and Age Policies

Facebook and MySpace have clear age policies posted on their websites. So, how is it possible
that so many kids under the required age are able to start accounts?
According to Pew Research Center, “More than half (55%) of online American youths ages 12-
17 use online social networking sites.”*15+ In the United Kingdom, 25% of children ages 8-12
have a profile page set up on Facebook, Bebo or MySpace in spite of the clear age restrictions.
[16]

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Upon close examination of those numbers, one can only assume that peer pressure is a
significant factor, and for the twelve-year-olds in question– either the parents are lying about
their child’s age, or the kids themselves are fibbing.

Possible Harmful Effects

Of course, we can all think of a few harmful effects that social networking sites may have on
individuals, but let’s take a moment to review how these sites may adversely affect our kids.
· Privacy- Young children are more likely to post personal information than older kids, and they
don’t fully understand the possible severity and consequences of posting inappropriate
photographs or videos. [3]
· Exposure to inappropriate content- According to Norton, the keyword “sex” was the 4th top
searched word in 2009 for tweens ages 8-12, and “porn” the top keyword for kids 7 and under.
[11] Aside from search engines and foul language, tweens have the opportunity to come across
inappropriate advertising or websites by clicking on links.
· Cyber-bullying- Tweens and children are not mature enough to withstand name-calling. In
April, a New Jersey middle school principal named Anthony Orsini made national news over his
plea to parents, asking them to remove their young children from Facebook. “They are simply
not psychologically ready for the damage that one mean person online can cause,” he told
parents via email. Orsini’s reasoning was based on several fights between students that
originally began online. [5] This frightening trend is not limited to New Jersey and has cropped
up in other states across the nation. Read more and comment about this story on SafetyWeb’s
blog here.
· Stranger danger- We’ve all heard the “stranger danger” saying, but the fact of the matter is
that children are often threatened by people whom are actually familiar to them. That said, the
Internet makes it quite easy for social networking perpetrators to pose as other people, or to
leave anonymous messages. According to Pew Research Center, “32% of online teens have
been contacted by someone with no connection to them or any of their friends, and 7% of
online teens say they have felt scared or uncomfortable as a result of contact by an online
stranger.” *15+
· Cyber-Stalking- Something as innocent as posting a photograph can reveal a lot of information
about your child including what their home looks like, what school they attend, or information
about their friends. Cyber-stalkers and Social Networking Predators may even approach your
child online and use seducing techniques to lure them into meeting face to face. Read about
how to prevent cyber-stalking on SafetyWeb’s blog here.
· Brain Changes- Lady Susan Greenfield, a neuroscientist and professor of synaptic
pharmacology at Lincoln College, Oxford, and director of the Royal Institution, has argued that
children who use social networking sites may experience a lack of attention span, a need for
immediacy for stimulation, and a “shaky sense of identity.” *13+ Then again, this is the same
argument that naysayers made about the impact of television and entertainment over the past
few decades. [10]

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· It’s Permanent!- Anything your child says or does online will leave a trace. Chances are, years
from now, a potential employer or college will be able to do a search on your child and find
his/her profile page. Read about how Facebook can kill your career on SafetyWeb’s blog here.

Positive Effects
With all the criticism about kids using social networks, these types of sites can have positive
effects on children as well. Social interaction of any kind provides lessons in both life and social
skills, as they teach children how to build strong friendships and long-lasting relationships.
· Relationship Building & Cultural Awareness- Social networks enable children to meet new
friends from distant lands, helping them become more worldly and sensitive to cultural
differences. Kids can also stay in touch or reunite with friends from their past who may have
moved away.
· Identity- Children can share their interests with others, join groups, experience a sense of
independence [14], and engage in positive self-expression by personalizing profile pages and
participating in discussions about topics that interest them. [9] This greatly facilitates the
building of a child’s sense of identity.
· Self-esteem- In correlation with identity building, social networks can help build self-esteem
and boost confidence.
· Battling Depression- Danah Boyd, a Ph.D. candidate at the School of Information, University of
California-Berkeley, and fellow at the Harvard University Berkman Center for Internet and
Society recently told The New York Times that homosexual teens living in rural areas may use
social networks to battle depression. “Thanks to such tools, many teens have chosen not to
take the path of suicide, knowing that there are others like them.” *18+
The use of blogging can also be very therapeutic. A 17-year-old named Tamaryn Stevens was
diagnosed with kidney disease when she was 10 and underwent transplant surgery. She logs on
to a social network called Livewire every day to chat with online friends, post her thoughts and
even upload original poetry. She says Livewire is “hugely beneficial… Especially the days that
you feel [down] in real social situations like school and things like that. You go home and you go
into Livewire and there’s people to talk to and it makes your day that much better.” *19+
· Education- A 2008 study conducted by the University of Minnesota discovered that “students
using social networking sites are actually practicing the kinds of 21st century skills we want
them to develop to be successful today.” Those skills include developing a positive attitude
towards technology and sharing creative, original content. [17] Social networks can help
educate kids in more formal academic areas like science, mathematics, history and more. [1]

How To Choose A Safe Social Network

When choosing a safe social network for your child under the age of 13, it’s important to
evaluate its safety and privacy policies. Ask yourself the following 7 questions:
1. How can I keep my child safe?
2. How often does the website monitor content and communication?

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3. Does the site have clear safety, security and privacy policies posted online?
4. Does the site have a TRUSTe Children’s Privacy seal, an ESRB Privacy Online Program seal,
or a VeriSign Secured seal visible?
5. Will my child be exposed to any inappropriate content in the form of advertising or links?
6. What will my child learn? [9]
7. Will I be notified of any dangerous activity?
Below is a list of safe social networks for children under the age of 13.
· Kidswirl- social network with interface similar to Facebook’s
· Club Penguin- operated by Walt Disney Corporation, online gaming site
· Webkinz- a site that features virtual pet caring for kids
· Whyville- educational Internet site with games
· Kidzworld- a content-driven community for tweens
· Kidzui- a special web browser and filter to keep kids safe
· FaceChipz- a social network for kids created by parents
· Kidzrocket- a social network for pre-teens

What To Do If Your Child Joins a Social Network

In a study called “Teens Surfing the Net: How Do They Learn To Protect Their Privacy?”,
researchers Deborah M Moscardelli and Catherine Liston-Heyes imply that “differences
between adults and young people with regard to privacy may be due to lack of knowledge
about privacy.” Their study found that parents who monitor their child’s Internet use, or those
that surf the Internet with them, have teenagers with higher rates of concerns about privacy
that those who do not. [20,21]
Here are some great steps to follow if your child (13+ years-old) joins a social networking Web
site.
1. Discuss why they want to use a social network and what type of content they plan on
adding.
2. Teach your child about online safety basics and what kind of personal information should
be kept private. [8]
3. Check your child’s privacy settings to restrict access and postings. Show your child how to
use these settings and explain their significance. [8]
4. Promote honesty. Try setting a good example by not lying and discuss how lying can hurt
relationships and trustworthiness. [2]
5. Discuss the harmful effects of social networks with your child. Be sure they understand
what expectations you have for their online behavior and what consequences they will face
(both in the household and in the outside world) should they stray away from those. Remind
them to only say or do things online that they are comfortable with others seeing. [8]

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6. Start your own account on the same websites and let your child know you’re there. Tread
carefully, however, and keep in mind that you can’t watch them 24/7, and some kids may
resent your monitoring. [3]
7. Take advantage of parental control features on your computer by restricting inappropriate
content.
8. Review your child’s friend list and ask questions if you see a friend unfamiliar to you.
9. Ask your child to refrain from positing photographs. Photos of children may be targets for
pedophiles. If you do allow photos, be sure they don’t include any identifiable information like
the exterior of your homes, as this may be a target for criminals. [4]
10. Do Facebook “reviews” with them. Log on together and review your child’s recent activity
so you can show that you trust him/her but you are still their parent. [4]
11. Teach your child to trust their “uh-oh” feeling. [12] Encourage them to tell you or another
reliable adult if they feel threatened or awkward because of something somebody said or did
online. Do your best to collect and print any threats that occur via email, instant messages,
postings, etc. If you feel that your child is in danger, report the incident to the police as well as
the social networking Web site.

How To Delete Underage Accounts

If your child is under the age of 13 and using Facebook, you may show your child how to delete
his/her account by clicking this link.
To report an underage Facebook user, fill out the appropriate form here.
To obtain data on your child’s Facebook account, click here. You will be asked to submit a
notarized statement saying you are the child’s parent or guardian.
To delete an underage MySpace account, click here.

Important Laws
Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) www.coppa.org- This law requires websites to
acquire parental consent for children under the age of 13 years old before collecting, using or
disclosing personal information. [6]
The California Online Privacy Protection Act (OPPA) This California state law requires websites
to post and comply with a privacy policy that can be found easily by its users. The law applies
to any website that is accessible by California residents. [7]

Helpful Organizations
Federal Trade Commission www.ftc.org
Children’s Advertising Review Unit (CARU) www.caru.org
National Center for Missing & Exploited Children
(NCMEC) www.missingkids.com orwww.netsmartz.org
i-SAFE www.i-safe.org

References
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1 “How Does Social Networking Help Children (PDF)” Surf Net Parents.
2 “Why Kids Lie Age by Age” Parenting.com.
3 “How Young is To Young for Facebook” Komando.com (1-16-10).
4 “Why Children Lie to Get a Facebook Page” Surfnetkids.com (11-25-09).
5 “Principal to parents:Take kids off Facebook” CNN.com (04-30-10).
6 “Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act” en.wikipedia.org.
7 “Online Privacy Protection Act” en.wikipedia.org.
8 “Social Networking Sites: A Parent’s Guide” FBI.gov(09-2007).
9 “How to Choose a Safe Social Network for Your Kids” Hubpages.com.
10 “Why Social Networks Are Good for the Kids” techcrunch.com (02-24-09).
11 “Kids’ Top 100 Searches of 2009” Norton Online Family.
12 “Facebook and Bebo risk ‘infantilising’ the human mind” guardian.co.uk (02-24-09).
14 “Parents balance freedom, safety on Facebook” The Atlanta Journal-Constitution (12-11-09).
15 “Pew Internet Addendum” Pew Internet.
16 “25% of 8 to 12 year olds have a social networking profile” Network World (03-31-10).
17 “Educational Benefits Of Social Networking Sites Uncovered” Science Daily (06-21-08).
18 “Is MySpace Good for Society? A Freakonomics Quorum” Freakonomics (02-15-08).
19 “The health benefits of social networking” ABC.net.au (04-30-09).
20 “Moscardelli, D.M. & Divine, R., 2007. Adolescents’ Concern for Privacy When Using the
Internet: An Empirical Analysis of Predictors and Relationships With Privacy-Protecting
Behaviors.” Family and Consumer Sciences Research Journal, 35(3), 232-252.
21 “Moscardelli, D.M. & Liston-Heyes, C., 2004. Teens Surfing The Net: How Do They Learn To
Protect Their Privacy?” Journal of Business and Economics Research, 2(9), 43-56.

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National Internet Safety Month
Introduction
The United States Senate has declared June as National Internet Safety Month. The resolutions
establishing National Internet Safety Month do not recommend any specific course of action in
honor of this designation. Rather, they commend the work that has been done thus far to
promote the safety of our nation’s youth online and make a call to increase “efforts to raise the
level of awareness in the United States regarding the need for online safety.” *1+
The goals of the United States Senate were to 1) Raise awareness about Internet safety issues,
and 2) challenge each of us to educate ourselves about online safety, and properly educate our
nation’s youth to behave responsibly when using the Internet. This resource article will provide
you with information to meet the challenge; it features information about some of the most
prominent areas in cyberspace where we are vulnerable, and what you can do to minimize your
exposure.

Internet Safety & Google

Recently, the United States government and various governments in the European Union have
taken issue with some of the practices of large, multi-conglomerate Internet companies.
Concerns raised by government officials are a result of offenses ranging from the length of time
an individual’s information is stored to the intrusive methods used to collect the information.
Known for its search engine functionality, Google, Inc. has diversified offerings that include
electronic mail, a street-mapping function, and online document management center. Like any
other online conglomerate, Google Inc., has made many tactical decisions to acquire different
companies and expand its capabilities to offer its users a more comprehensive experience to

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search for and manage information on the web. Ultimately, Google is making these moves to
stay relevant and competitive in the marketplace.
Just like recent issues raised about the changing privacy policies of social networking giant
Facebook, Google has dealt with criticism of how it handles its users’ information – specifically
that the company saves individuals’ searches forever. The fact that Google has this
information, and is legally able to maintain it as long as they please, makes many individuals
and privacy advocates very uncomfortable. Our own federal government is unable to maintain
such private and specific information about individuals. However, if they ever needed to access
the information maintained by Google and other search engine companies, it could be legally
possible.
In 2007, when Google acquired online advertising company DoubleClick, Google’s ability to
“record, analyze and track” certain information was called into question, and the Electronic
Privacy Information Center (EPIC) requested an investigation of Google’s information collection
practices. [2] Well before the 2007 Google-DoubleClick merger, DoubleClick’s plans to build a
database of consumer profiles raised concerns amongst privacy advocates, and those plans
would result in less privacy for consumers. [3]
The first half of this year has been a tough one for Google. In March 2010, The European Union
opened an Anti-Trust investigation of the web giant, concerning results displayed by the search
engine. Google’s competitors assert that their company names are omitted from search results
conducted on Google’s web browser. *4+ Just two months later, Google has come under
immense scrutiny in Europe for violating privacy in its efforts to collect data for its street view
mapping service. Google’s co-founder, Sergey Brin said, “We screwed up,” referring to the
company’s act of collecting information from Wi-Fi networks for Street View. [5]
The most recent privacy-violating snafus by the Internet giant – its launch of social networking
component, GoogleBuzz – galvanized privacy officials from 10 countries to co-sign a letter
urging Google to build more privacy controls around its many offerings: “It calls on Google to
create ‘privacy-protective’ default settings and make it easy for people to delete their accounts,
among other measures.” *6+ Users have taken to the blogosphere to discuss how the clash of a
privacy-based tool like electronic mail and a social-based application like Buzz are diametrically
opposed and don’t have an inherent synergy. *7+

Cyber-Stalking: Warning Signs & Prevention

Amid all the decisions to merge companies and add new functionalities, Internet businesses are
simultaneously making changes to their privacy policies and data collection practices. Those
changes can result in some of your previously private information being made public…and in
some cases lead to potentially dangerous situations in the real world, including identity theft
and cyberstalking.
Cyberstalking can take many forms, and many times, victims do not know that they have been
cyberstalked until it is too late and the damage has been done. People cyberstalk others to
exert power, control or exact revenge. Traditional stalkers are also able to utilize the tools of
the web and add to their abilities to physically locate their targets.

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As one of the first well-publicized victims of cyberstalking, Jayne Hitchcock became a
cyberstalking victim’s advocate, writing a book and establishing a
website, www.haltabuse.org as a resource to prevent cyberstalking, and educate individuals
who are victims of cyberstalking. Jayne’s story is one that unfortunately, is becoming more
common. Her email was hacked and used by a third party to send suggestive emails in spam
messages to various people on the web. She began receiving unwanted messages in her email.
She and her husband even began receiving items in the mail that they had not ordered. [8]
Making changes to various online profiles every time a site makes a privacy policy modification
can be tedious, overwhelming, and confusing. So, there are a few things that everyone should
do regardless of what service they use to email, or how many social networking profiles they
maintain:
-Make sure that all of your accounts are password protected, and change your password often,
at least 4 times per year. Email accounts, bank accounts, or any site where you enter sensitive
information like your social security number, address, or any financial information should be
protected by a password. Your password should be something that no one can guess. This
makes it more difficult for cyberstalkers to guess your passwords and hack your accounts.
-Use a national Internet Service Provider (ISP) where possible rather than a local ISP. An
Internet Service Provider supplies a connection that allows you to plug into the Internet and
surf the web. A local ISP can reveal your physical location, leading a traditional stalker to your
doorstep or providing fuel for a cyberstalker to concentrate on making life difficult for you in
your hometown. This articleprovides an overview of regional vs. national ISPs and the pros and
cons of each.
-Never respond to any of the messages you receive that are inappropriate or make you feel
uncomfortable. You should record the messages and save them in a separate file so that you
can have a record for the authorities if the situation escalates to a legal contest.
-If you are transmitting information on a website, make sure it begins with https…https means
it’s secure. *9+
-Make sure the sites where you have social interactions or share information have an anti-
harassment policy. If it is violated, be sure to notify the site administrator as well as the ISP on
which the harassment occurred.
It is important to talk with your child about the signs of cyberstalking. When interacting with
their friends or just conducting their normal socializing online, your child should take note of:
-A sudden increase in unsolicited and inappropriate messages on their email
-Unwanted telephone calls or messages on their social networking profile pages
-Packages or mail delivered to them that they did not order
-Receiving anonymous notes or threats via email, U.S. mail, or notes on their car, school locker,
etc.
If any of these things occur, you should:

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-Collect all the messages sent to an email or social networking profile site, and properly
document the time, date and source of the unsolicited message(s).
-Block the senders address so that they cannot send any additional messages to free email
accounts or social networking profile inboxes.
-If blocking the messages does not work, suspend or close any social networking profiles or free
email accounts to which the messages are being sent.
-Contact the United States Postal Service or other mail house that is delivering unsolicited
packages and mail to your home and alert them to the situation. Make sure they put a flag on
your address and clear any packages with you before they deliver them.
-Report the unwanted messages to the sites that they are being posted on, and your Internet
Service Provider.
Utilizing a reputable parental controls program to monitor your child’s activities online –
especially if you are the parent of a very young minor – can give you added peace of mind. As a
parent, you will be able to respond in a timely manner if your child is unable to recognize the
signs of cyberstalking, or if they are hesitant to tell you of their trouble. In many instances, time
is of the essence when preventing cyber crime from translating into real-world crime. If a
parent has information in real-time almost as simultaneously as it is being posted, they can take
action quickly to protect their child.
Finally, as a parent, there are steps you can take to insure that your actions do not jeopardize
your children. When you post photos of your family or child online, be aware that those photos
can be copied and used for purposes other than your intended purpose. Also, photos of your
children can possibly attract the attention of child predators. Make sure the photos of your
child on the Internet are as innocent as possible, and are posted on a site that has policies in
place to respond to your concerns should any occur.

Staying Safe on Social Networks

Status functions on social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace allow users to keep in
close touch and share as much information as often as they would like about where they are
going, and what they are doing. Avid users of the ‘status’ applications may opt for Twitter – -
where you can update your status, post your thoughts or tell a joke in 140 characters or less – -
and link it to your social networking profiles so that everything gets updated simultaneously.
One can even update their GPS location via Twitter directly from their cell phone.
Our dependency on technology and our willingness to use technology to open up our
accessibility to our networks has its upsides. Finding a missing child or tracking an abduction-in-
progress can be achieved more quickly today than 20 years ago. Triangulating cell phone
transmissions or sending out an AMBER alert affords authorities an advantage of not losing the
time they would have lost before these technological advances. However, where there is a
helpful use of a tool, there is often an opportunity for it to be abused.
Similar to traditional stalkers, burglars are only really effective if they know your whereabouts
— only burglars don’t want to be where you are; instead, they’d rather be at your home when

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you are away. Our modern advancements and culture of being open with our information has
afforded burglars all the information they need to be successful in their chosen field!
Just this spring, the infamous ‘Bling Ring’ was convicted for burglarizing the homes of young
celebrities in Hollywood…and they used social networking to do it: “Their methods were
simple. They tracked their victims by using social media, Facebook and Twitter. They know
when they were home and when they were away. They even used Google Earth to scope out
their homes.” *10+
The frequency of burglaries occurring as a result of online status postings is on the rise. British
insurance company and investment management firm Legal & General conducted a survey and
found “nearly 40% of social networking users share holiday plans on sites like Facebook and
Twitter. They also found about 13% of Facebook users and 92% of Twitter users tend to accept
friend requests or follows without checking up on the source.” *11+ As a result, the firm may
raise insurance premiums for parents whose children use Facebook and Twitter and update
their statuses with vacation and travel plans. [12] In fact, one firm in Great Britain has already
taken action: “Insurance firm Hiscox, which will not insure celebrities who allow details of their
holidays to be published in magazines, said it would penalise customers who state their where-
abouts on public sites.” *13+
As this is a growing trend, and one that has caught the attention of insurance carriers,
government agencies, and the media, it would behoove all users of social networking sites to
pay careful attention to what information they share, and when they share it. Follow these tips
to avoid being burgled via your social networking profile status:
-Do not post your travel plans at all.
-If you want to share your plans with your friends, family and fans, opt for letting everyone
know when you are safely back in town.
-Do not give any specific information before you depart that would let the reader know when
you are departing.

Managing Your Online Reputation

The old sayings “You are the company you keep” or “Show me a man’s friends, and I’ll show
you the man” may not be so accurate in cyberspace. We may not always know who we are
friending. A friend of a friend whom you met while at a party one night is an acquaintance, not
a friend…but no such distinction exists in cyberspace. The blog Online Reputation discusses the
potential ramifications to one’s reputation by making bad decisions on social networking sites.
As easy as it is to look up someone’s name and address on the net, it’s just as easy to post
information about yourself or anyone else. A simple search of your name will probably
yield Online Reputation results even you are surprised by.

Useful Privacy Blogs

The issue of online privacy is becoming more and more important and relevant to all of us.
Several individuals and services have dedicated sites to researching the issues, and discussing

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ways we can all keep our private information under lock and key. A listing by Virtual
Hosting.com highlights a few of the most active privacy blogs on the web:
1. Protect Personal and Financial Privacy: The name says it all. This blog is all about the issues
that surround keeping your identity safe, your data secure and your financial and medical
information private.
2. ID Theft Secrets Blog: This blog is dedicated to helping consumers find the resources and
information they need to protect their credit card and personal data from becoming prey to
identity fraudsters. Readers will get tips on simple things they can do to avoid becoming
victims.
3. Fight Identity Theft Blog: Here, readers will find ways they can actively work to stop identity
theft and protect themselves from those with ill intentions. The blog also posts on the latest
news, technology and scams to watch out for.
4. Privacy and Identity Theft Blog: Written by Dave Jevans, this blog posts the latest in
information and identity theft. Stories of what happened to others can help you ensure that the
same things don’t happen to you.
5. Anti-Phishing Blog: This blog acts as a resource for Internet users. It lists recent phishing
scams so that if you’re presented with them you’ll know what to look out for and what not to
fall for.
6. Mark Nestman: Preserving Your Privacy and More: As the name suggests, this blog focuses
on ways that individuals can protect their privacy. Posts on keeping your encrypted data safe
and protecting yourself from identity theft are interspersed with the latest news in privacy
politics and law.

Government Resources
Recognizing that our children are among the most vulnerable citizens in general, and
specifically online, our government has dedicated resources for parents and guardians to stay
on top of trends in cyber safety. As a parent, it is important to educate oneself and keep
abreast of Internet issues and fads. Some important sites to visit hosted by the United States
Federal Government are:
National Criminal Justice Reference Service
http://www.ncjrs.gov/internetsafety
United States Computer Emergency Readiness Team
www.us-cert.gov/cas/tips
United States Homeland Security
www.whitehouse.gov/issues/homeland-security
National Center for Missing and Exploited Children
www.missingkids.com/missingkids/servlet/PublicHomeServlet?LanguageCountry=en_US

Resources
SafetyWeb
www.safetyweb.com

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Stay Safe Online
www.staysafeonline.org
Social Times
http://www.socialtimes.com
National Center for Victims of Crime Stalking Center
http://www.ncvc.org/src/Main.aspx
Online Reputation
http://www.onlinereputation.com
Privacy Rights Clearinghouse
http://www.privacyrights.org/fs/fs14-stk.htm
Cyberstalking FAQ
http://www.crime-safety-security.com/Cyber-Stalking.html
Halt Abuse – Founded by a cyberstalking victim
http://www.haltabuse.org/
Internet Safety Center
http://www.internetsafetycenter.com/internet-safety-kids-parental-control

References
1 “2005 Resolution (PDF)” The National Internet Safety Month.”(5-18-2005)
“2007 Resolution (PDF)” The National Internet Safety Month.”
2 “Google/DoubleClick Merger” EPIC”
3 “Privacy Fears Raised by DoubleClick Database Plans” CNET News”(1-25-00)
4 “Goggle Hit With Antitrust Investigation in Europe” Mashable”(2-10-10)
5 “Google Street View Privacy Probe Joined by Spain, Italy, France” Bloomberg”(5-20-10)
6 “Ten Countries Ask Google to Do More to Protect Privacy“Wall Street Journal”(4-20-10)
7 “Google Buzz Privacy Issues Have Real Life Implications“TechCrunch”(2-12-10)
8 “Abuse of Usenet: Cyberstalked How It All Began“Jahitchcock”(8-04-06)
9 “How to Avoid Someone Cyber Stalking You“Ehow”
10 “Think Twice: That Facebook Update Could Get You Robbed“Mashable”(8-27-09)
11 “Facebook and Twitter users face pricier insurance as burglars ’shop’ for victims’ personal
details on networking sites“MailOnline”(8-27-09)
12 “Facebook, Twitter users prone to burglaries, say insurers“Social News”(3-22-10)

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Daddying in the Digital Age

Introduction
Being a father is something that most men cherish. Reminiscing about clapping at his
daughter’s first ballet recital or high-fiving his son after a little league game will be among most
dads’ favorite memories. When those cute kids start exploring their world and socializing with
their peers, another facet of parenting is introduced into the father-child relationship.
For today’s father, helping their children learn to socialize in the real world is not the only
matter to address when teaching their kids how to make friends. Preparing his children to
socialize responsibly on the Internet is standard on the list of fatherly responsibilities these
days. This article will examine the evolving role of fatherhood and what it means to protect
your family.

The Traditional Father: Provider and Protector

Sixty years later, and Ward Cleaver is still the standard by which most Americans measure a
good father. Ward was the family provider and protector, always standing ready with an
encouraging word and reassuring touch. June, the doting domestic goddess was ready with a
band-aid and kiss for all those elbow ouchies. Each family member had a clear role and
responsibilities, and expectations of each were so well engrained, they did not need to be
spoken.

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It seemed as though soothing the wounds of growing pains was easy, too. Sharing a story
about his childhood bully… you know, how everyone grew up and gained perspective, and now
everything is fine…was an effective way to assuage his child’s fears. Even teaching his child how
to stay safe when it came to strangers: “Don’t take candy from someone you don’t know”, “Tell
me if a strange car repeatedly drives by the house”…the traditional father was able to offer
tangible examples and clear rules that were easy for kids grasp and practice.

Fast Forward: Postmodern PaPa

Parenting in postmodern America is a dramatic departure from the picture-perfect suburban
paradise in which the Cleavers lived. Even the hard and fast rules about dad being the primary
provider and mom as domestic guru have shifted. A finding in a 2008 report released by the
Families and Work Institute showed that “attitudes about women’s and men’s work and family
roles have changed”, and more specifically that “views about appropriate work and family roles
have converged to a point where they are virtually identical”*1+.
Dads are faced with the unique challenge of raising children in a global digital culture, not just
American culture. The integration of the Internet into our lives has made the world a smaller,
more accessible place for younger generations to discover and explore. It is just as easy (and
free) for kids in America to have a video chat with someone in Timbuktu as it is for them to
place a call to their best friend.
Today, the childhood bullies are cyber bullies, sending taunting messages and texts to their
targets. And the strangers? They are not offering candy and taking slow rides through different
neighborhoods. They are hanging out in chat rooms and sending messages on social
networking sites. So how does dad help his kids navigate these ‘rites of passage’ into early
adolescents and beyond?

Daddying in the Digital Age

It seems that fathers are ahead of the curve when it comes to providing guidance and support
concerning their kids’ online activities. In an April 2010 survey conducted by Yahoo! and Ipsos
OTX, it was found that:
“71% of dads (compared to 63% of moms) say they are taking at least one action to help
manage their children’s online behavior including having conversations about respecting the
privacy of others and checking their children’s privacy settings. — More dads than moms have
had a conversation with their children about their digital reputations and how to promote a
positive online reputation” *2+.
Taking an interest about your child’s online activity and staying engaged through conversation
is probably the most important step a father can take when it comes to protecting their
children online. Consistent communication establishes a strong foundation of trust, and dads
can find out not only what their kids are doing online, but where they are doing it, and
potentially with whom.
Protecting their children online has even inspired some fathers to invent ways to safeguard
their children when perusing the Internet. In 2006, a Glasgow father developed a digital ID card
for chat room users after he discovered that his daughter only knew 50 of the 150 people on

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her buddy list [3]. Michael P. Clark and Geoffrey Argonne developed the idea for SafetyWeb
after noting how well documented and easy to find the dubious behavior of college applicants
was online. As fathers of young children, they realized they had to address issues of good
judgment online reputation with their children before they became teens, and that there had
to be a better system to monitor activity than logging onto each social networking site
separately.

What You Do Matters

Teens’ have different ideas than their parents when it comes to attitudes about privacy.
Parents must understand that “Teenagers will freely give up personal information to join social
networks on the Internet. Afterwards, they are surprised when their parents read their
journals” *4+. Knowing that this paradoxical thinking exists in the teenaged mind can be helpful
to parents, specifically that there are things dads can do to change that thinking.
A 2008 study revealed that parents’ influence affects their teens’ views on privacy protection
online. Taking the time to mediate conversations, and encouraging your child to develop
critical thinking skills will greatly increase the likelihood of their taking the time to weigh the
consequences of their words and actions online [5].
Kids also pay attention to what their parents do online. If you are a single father exploring the
world of online dating, chances are you children are paying attention to the types of photos you
are posting on your profile.
Even the most innocuous photos posted by parents who want to share family moments can be
taken and manipulated for reasons completely unintended by the person who originally posted
the photo [6].

Be Aware: Tips for Protecting Your Children Online

Setting a good example for your teen and being a good online citizen is the best way to
demonstrate how you expect your child to behave online. Here are some things every father
can do to be a good representative of online conduct:
-Keep private information private. Stay consistent with the information you discuss around
your home and regard as private. Do not share intimate details about financial information,
family medical issues or difficult emotional burdens you have endured as a family, or
individually, online.
-Monitor your time online. Self-regulate the amount of time you spend online and strike a
healthy balance between your own leisure activities online, and business and work activities
conducted while at home during hours allotted for family activities.
-Get to know terms of use and your privacy rights for the sites you use. As a parent, it is helpful
for you to know what you can do to protect yourself and your family on all the various sites you
use. While your child may not embrace this activity until they become older, it is more likely
they will do it if they see you do it.

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Setting a good example is not the only thing you can do to protect your children online. As they
mature and grow older, your kids will become more independent and expect to engage in some
online activities unsupervised. Here are some tips to keep you kids safe online:
-Get to know some of the lingo. This article is brief, but gives an overview of some things kids
text each other and what they mean. Other sites like this one contain a more comprehensive
list of abbreviations people use to express themselves in cyber space.
-Surf the Internet with Your Child. Taking a few hours a week to surf the Internet with your child
allows you time to bond with them. It also affords you the opportunity time to discover your
child’s online habits and teach them in real-time the appropriateness of the content they are
viewing online. Whether they are looking at funny videos or a bullying text from one of their
classmates, you can teach them to the correct way to respond to the content, and help them
develop coping skills.
While tone and inflection do not always translate in online communications (like email and
texting), intent is conveyed loud and clear. The more time one spends online or immersed in
negative or dysfunctional behavior, the more ‘normal’ it can seem. Make sure your child is able
to make an emotional connection to their activity and the activity of others online.
-Check in With Your Child and Have Frequent Conversations About What’s Hot on the ‘Net. Hot
activities, like social networking and location-based apps can be fun and help your child learn
how to socialize. But they can also take up a lot of time, and lead to Internet addiction and
leave your child vulnerable to cyber bullies. Have discussion with your child about balancing
their online activities with real-life activities, and to protect their privacy and online reputation.
Also, educate yourself about the applications your child is using. Make sure you understand the
privacy policies and information-sharing implications of the activities your child is involved in on
the ‘net.
-Talk to Your Child About Positive Things They Can Do Online. There are a lot of activities one
can do online. A recent survey has found that many teens use the Internet to cure their
boredom and become involved in positive activities online rather than engage in risky
behavior. Whether itsblogging about their extra-curricular activities, or creating an original
trailer for one of their favorite movies, the Internet offers an environment where kids and teens
can develop hobbies and hone some digital skills.
Encourage your child to use the information and tools available on the Internet to develop
hobbies, enhance their skill-set and expand their world.
- Before Giving Your Child a Digital Device, Set Standards and Ground Rules for Use.
If you feel its time for your teen to have their own cell phone, laptop or digital camera, set
some ground rules for use. Whether you are able to control the number of minutes on a cell
phone, block certain callers or limit the number and nature of apps they use, it is important that
your teen understands not all digital products and activities are meant for them to use.
As your child uses their devices responsibly and matures, allow them more privileges.
Rewarding good behavior is just as important as setting and enforcing restrictions.

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Remember that online interaction is only one facet of ways people socialize and interact. The
best gift any parent or father can give is spending time with his children.

References
[1] Galinsky, Ellen; Aumann, Kerstin; Bond, James T. Times are Changing Gender and
Generation at Work and Home.
2008 http://familiesandwork.org/site/research/reports/Times_Are_Changing.pdf
[2] Yahoo! Gives Parents a B+ for Taking Action to Protect Children Online. 10 June 2010
www.forbes.com/feeds/businesswire/2010/06/10/businesswire140890463.html
[3] Elliot, Valerie. Father designs ID card to protect children in internet chat rooms. 3 August
2006www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/article698286.ece
[4] Barnes, Susan B. The Privacy Pardox: Social Networking in the United States. 15 August 2006
http://131.193.153.231/www/issues/issue11_9/barnes/index.html
[5] Youn, Seounmi. Parental Influence and Teens’ Attitude Toward Online Privacy Protection. 2
October 2008
www.redorbit.com/news/technology/1575192/parental_influence_and_teens_attitude_towar
d_online_privacy_protection/
[6] Family Christmas Photo Shows Up in Czech Ad. 10 June 2009
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/31214408

Resources
My Dad ‘N Me
www.mydadnme.com/index.php
Great Dad.com
www.greatdad.com
Dad Trends
http://dadtrends.com
National Center for Fathering
www.fathers.com
The Father’s Network
www.fathersnetwork.org

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Video Sharing

Definition & Background

Video sharing is the act of recording video and uploading it on a website that allows others to
view it. Video may also be shared by sending it to others via email or cell phone.

Popular Uses and Applications of Video Sharing

Video hosting websites have enabled organizations like non-profits and educational institutions
spread the word of their missions and gain momentum to support some very worthy causes. It
allows people to easily distribute their message to a large audience and adds a personal touch
while saving both time and money.
Sharing videos for social purposes has proven to be as popular, if not more popular than sharing
videos for business purposes. Individuals may upload videos for reasons ranging from voicing
their opinions on a vlog (video blog) to sharing the personal statement section of their college
entrance application to showcasing a talent.

Data and Research

Over the last five years, there has been extensive research about the uses of video sharing on
websites and cellular phones among different demographic groups. A study released in April,
2010 about sharing videos via cell phones shows “an interesting counter-trend, with more 12-
13 year-olds sending/receiving video than those 14 and older (41% vs. 27%).” 1 The graph below
summarizes the full spectrum of photo and video usage for cell phones:

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The comfort level and higher frequency of sending and receiving video can be a cause for alarm
to parents, and should be. The content and subject matter of their videos is most likely
harmless – forwarding popular funny videos from the Internet, like the sneezing panda. Many
parents are concerned about how easy it is for their children to acquire and/or use video
technology. Webcams are affordable and easily accessible, and many laptops on the market
today come equipped with a built-in webcam.

Harmful Effects?
Technological advances have allowed the average consumer to acquire discreet video recording
devices, and the proliferation of video capabilities on laptops (webcams and built-in webcams
on laptops) and cell phones means that anyone of our children – - or anyone of us for that
matter – - could potentially be recorded on video at anytime without our knowledge. With
children in particular, a silly moment at a party during which they may exercise bad judgment
(or no judgment) may be caught on camera by a friend and live forever on video. One child
may send the silly video to another on a cell phone, or by email, and if interest is high enough, a
video can go ‘viral’ within hours and cause potential emotional scarring for the subject of the
video. The fact that “57% of [adult] internet users have watched videos online and most of
them share what they watch with others,”2 shows an increasing trend that a video posted or
shared will not only be viewed, but passed along to others.
An issue that is just as plausible as a child being videotaped without their knowledge is the child
who purposefully creates their own video and sends it to one person. In this case, the most
frequent cause for concern is if they are in a relationship, and an intimate video is created to
share with their mate. The danger in this situation is when the two break-up, and if it is an
unpleasant parting, one half of the couple has fuel to embarrass the other. Unfortunately, the
likelihood of this scenario is more and more likely, as according to a survey conducted by The
National Campaign, “22% of teen girls and 18% of teen boys have sent or posted nude or semi-
nude pictures or video of themselves.”3Another popular scenario becoming more common-
place is that of teens ‘sexting’ – sending sexually explicit text messages, or partial or fully nude
pictures of themselves – to someone as a way to flirt. Read about and discuss sexting here on
the SafetyWeb blog.

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The creation of user-generated videos and sending or posting such private content is treated
different generationally.4 An article published by CNET News describes the ‘Naked Generation’,
and the ease with which twenty-somethings post personal information about themselves, their
relationships, and their partners. They are a generation living online. Our children witness the
actions of the generation just preceding theirs and are desensitized to ‘private’ information
being shared publicly, and further blur the line themselves. The consequences of actions taken
in a passionate moment are not considered until it is too late.
The effects on an individual as the result of a video being distributed without permission can be
devastating, far-reaching and long lasting. Obvious immediate effects are loss of self-esteem,
embarrassment, loss of friends and social alienation, which can lead to depression and other
emotional issues. Longer-lasting effects can range from losing candidacy for a job or becoming
ineligible to matriculate at an institute of higher learning. In a nutshell, some of life’s milestone
moments for a young adult may be ruined because of a decision they made as a young child or
teen.

Another Pitfall to Consider about Children and Video Sharing

It is important to speak to your child about the responsible use of video on their cell phones
and email accounts. Some states have amended laws about distribution of child pornography
to include forwarding video via cell phone and electronic mail, or sexting. Some states are
charging participants with felony counts and they are required to register on the sex offender
list, which can affect them for life. In some cases, it is not clear if the age of the distributor is
taken into consideration. Parents should take every opportunity to speak to their children and
educate them about this danger. Discuss this issue on the SafetyWeb blog here. If your child
receives a video that shows partial or full nudity of one of their classmates or friends, they
should delete it immediately and never forward it to anyone else.

Know Your Video Sites – - and Their Terms of Service

There is a proliferation of video sharing sites on the Internet. Because the sites have different
offerings and goals, the terms of service for the sites vary. Some of the most popular sites
include: Photobucket, Flickr, MySpace, Facebook, YouTube, Yahoo! Video, Google Video,
Metacafe, Revver and Blip.tv.
A few bloggers have explored the differences between some of the terms of so that users have
a better understanding of important issues like intellectual property, and privacy rights. A brief
article comparing terms of service agreements for several different video-hosting sites can be
read by clicking here. Wikipedia also has a page called Comparison of Video Services which
offers a very inclusive list of video hosting sites, and some profile information about those sites,
including their terms of service.

Ways You Can Help

Opening up the lines of communication and talking to your child is the best way to prepare
them to use video technology responsibly. Teach your child that if they feel uncomfortable
posing for a photo or video, it probably isn’t the best thing to do, and that they can stop at any
time. Tell them it is okay to ask you if they receive a message and they are unsure if it is a

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‘good’ message or a ‘bad’ message. Spend time with your child so that they are able develop
their own judgment and readily identify good and bad images and videos. Teach them to trust
their judgment, delete the bad images, and tell you if they are really offensive or potentially
dangerous.

External Resources and Online Resources

- CommonSense Media
http://www.commonsensemedia.org/talking-about-sexting
-American Academy of Pediatrics
http://www.aap.org/advocacy/releases/june09socialmedia.htm
-MomLogic
http://www.momlogic.com/2010/02/talk_about_sexting_with_your_kids_teens.php
-ABC Good Morning America
http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Parenting/truth-teens-sexting/story?id=7337547
- American Medical Network
http://www.health.am/ab/more/talking-to-kids-about-sexting-internet-use/

References
1. Rainie, Lee. Use of cell phone for pictures and video popular across all age groups. Pew
Internet & American Life Project, April 20,
2010 http://www.pewinternet.org/Infographics/2010/Use-of-cell-phone-for-picture-and-video-
by-age.aspx, accessed on May 20, 2010.
2. Madden, Mary. Online Video. Pew Internet & American Life Project, July 25,
2007,http://www.pewinternet.org/~/media//Files/Reports/2007/PIP_Online_Video_2007.pdf.
pdf, accessed on May 20, 2010
3. The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy
http://www.thenationalcampaign.org/sextech/PDF/SexTech_Summary.pdf, accessed on May
20, 2010
4. McCarthy, Caroline. Welcome to the Naked Generation. CNET News, September 21,
2007http://news.cnet.com/8301-13577_3-9782224-36.html, accessed on May 20, 2010

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 Cyberbullying
Definition & Background
Cyberbullying simply refers to the act of bullying online. This type of bullying can consist of any
of the following actions committed by an individual or group to another individual or group:
 Threats of violence
 Hate speech
 Harassment
 Peer pressure
 Bribery
 Psychological abuse
 Extortion
Further, these offenses are often committed by people impersonating someone else,
anonymously, or under the guise of a group, making accountability and preventability difficult.
The definition of cyberbullying has broadened over the years since it has expanded to include
any number of internet connected devices, web sites, behaviors, victims, and victimizers. For
example, in its earliest incarnations, cyberbullying mostly consisted of one person or small
group of people attacking each other via an internet-enabled desktop computer. These earlier
offenses, while certainly harmful, had some limitations in the amount of damage they could
cause because:
 Most computer usage was still limited to desktop computers
 Broadband internet connectivity was more limited
 Most mobile devices were not equipped with cameras and/or data services

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 Social Networks were not mainstream
Given these constraints, you did not hear about it as much as it was generally less frequent, and
was usually confined to smaller groups.
Today, things are different. Most homes and schools have broadband connectivity, portable
Internet enabled computers and devices prevail, most mobile phones have photo, video, and
data services, and socializing online has long hit mainstream. Given the pervasiveness and social
acceptance of these technologies, it has become very easy for one person to not only capture
and share information easily, but for that information to spread almost instantly.

Cyber bullying Facts

The cyber bullying statistics can be quite daunting. For example, a study done by isafe.org on
1,500 students grades 4-8 found the following1:
 42% of kids have been bullied while online. 1 in 4 have had it happen more than once.
 35% of kids have been threatened online. Nearly 1 in 5 have had it happen more than once.
 21% of kids have received mean or threatening e-mail or other messages.
 58% of kids admit someone has said mean or hurtful things to them online. More than 4 out
of 10 say it has happened more than once.
 53% of kids admit having said something mean or hurtful to another person online. More
than 1 in 3 have done it more than once.
 58% have not told their parents or an adult about something mean or hurtful that happened
to them online.
So what does this mean for the victims? A recent survey conducted by Sameer Hinduja and
Justin W. Patchin at cyberbullying.us yielded the following results:

“Looking at the most recent victims of cyberbullying, both boys and girls are likely
to report feeling angry, sad, and embarrassed. Slightly more girls than boys feel
frustrated, while significantly more boys are scared as a result of cyberbullying.” 2
Similarities and Differences to Offline Behavior

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Cyberbullying varies dramatically from offline bullying in many ways. For starters, the torment
is no longer limited to face-to-face interactions in a controlled environment. It now carries over
from the schoolyard, to the home, and the entire online community. Also, as mentioned above,
bullies can come in all shapes and sizes, with either known or unknown identities. No longer is it
about the one big bully picking on the smaller kid in the schoolyard. Anyone with an Internet
connection of any kind can bully almost anyone else. Further, not only is cyberbullying more
difficult to prevent, it can spread very quickly and leave a permanent online trail that can have
devastating long-term consequences for both the bullied and the bully.

Harmful Effects
The effects of cyberbullying can hurt and hurt quickly. There have been numerous stories in the
news of children, teens, and young adults who have been driven to suicide or violent crime as a
result of being bullied online. While these tend to be the more extreme cases, cyberbullying can
have a serious detrimental effect on a victim’s self-esteem, emotional well-being, and sense of
personal safety. As a result, this can often lead to any number of further negative consequences
including, but not limited to depression, despondence, self-destructive behavior and poor
performance in school or work just to name a few.

Recognizing if Cyberbullying is a problem with your Child and How to

Stop Cyberbullying
Parents and teachers are best equipped to recognize changes in behavior that might be the
result of cyberbullying. Communication with your child, his/her teachers, coaches, and friends is
a must. Also, being “friends” with your child online and understanding how they “live” online as
well as offline will not only help you to stay informed, but can also let your child know that you
are there. Opinions vary greatly on this issue, and certainly vary based on the age of the child in
question. Whether you do or don’t become online friends with your child, a discussion with
your child about it can’t hurt.

What to do if you discover your child is involved in a situation

involving Cyberbullying…
Talk to your child, make sure they are OK, and make sure they know you are on their side. Some
children can be embarrassed or ashamed of the situation they might find themselves in. It is
important to have an open dialogue with them.
Next, if the offenses are serious enough, you should consider contacting your child’s school
and/or your local law enforcement agency. Just because it happens online, you should not take
these offenses lightly. Also, be sure to NOT erase any traces of what you find online as these
traces (e.g. comments, messages, photos, etc.) can help in taking action against a cyberbully.
Finally, contact the web site(s), social networks, or mobile phone providers that might have
been used as a platform for these offenses. They most often take these offenses seriously and
are willing to help stop and prevent these behaviors.

Laws That Help

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 Cyberbullying legislation has been introduced in New York, Missouri, Rhode Island and
Maryland. In June, 2008, Rep. Linda Sanchez (D-Calif.) and Rep. Kenny Hulshof (R-Mo.)
proposed a federal law that would criminalize acts of cyberbullying. 3

External Resources
 http://www.connectsafely.org/Safety-Tips/tips-to-help-stop-cyberbullying.html
 http://www.isafe.org
 http://www.cyberbullying.us
 http://netfamilynews.org
 http://www.ncpc.org/cyberbullying

References
1 http://www.isafe.org/channels/sub.php?ch=op⊂_id=media_cyber_bullying
2 http://www.cyberbullying.us/research.php
3 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyber-bullying

Terms Associated with Cyberbullying

Cyberbullying, internet bullying, bullying, sexting, harassing, stalking, abusing

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Sexting 101
Definition & Background
“Sexting” is a relatively new term used for the act of sending a sexually suggestive or explicit
text message (AKA texting, SMS, MMS) to someone else. In most instances, the intended
recipient is a current or prospective boyfriend or girlfriend. These messages may vary from
simple text, to photos, or even short videos sent from a mobile phone to either another phone
and/or email account.
References to sexting in mainstream society only date back to 2006. It is a newer concept that
appears to be directly correlated with the emergence of faster mobile networks, more
sophisticated phones (with photo and video cameras and different messaging options), and the
increasing availability of these networks and devices to teens.

Sexting Statistics
Like many emerging threats to online safety and child safety, reports vary about the
proliferation and severity of texting. However, it is hard to dispute that the problem exists and
that the consequences can be dangerous. A report done by The National Campaign to Prevent
Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy in 2008 surveyed 1,280 teens and young adults. Their research
found that 75% of teens and 71% of young adults believe that sending sexually suggestive
content “can have serious negative consequences.” Despite that, 39% of teens and 59% of
young adults have sent or posted sexually suggestive emails or text messages, and 20% of teens
and 33% of young adults have sent/posted nude or semi-nude images of themselves. Perhaps
more disturbing was the study’s finding that ~38% teens and ~46% of young adults say it is

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common for nude or semi-nude photos to get shared with people other than the intended
recipient.[1]
Similarities & Differences to Offline Behavior
A common thread in many threats facing online teens these days is that the behaviors creating
the threats are not new, but the manner in which these behaviors are manifested are. While a
precocious teen in the 1980s might have sent a provocative note or photograph to their
boyfriend or girlfriend, today’s teen uses mobile devices, social networks, and email to share
such content. These channels make it easy to share, reproduce, and forward such content to
unintended recipients. Even worse, unlike their counterpart of 20 years ago, today’s teen must
cope with the fact that behaviors such as sexting can not only have serious safety and legal
repercussions, but may also leave a permanent record.

Harmful Effects
A shared sexting message could have disastrous consequences. For starters, the impact of such
content getting “leaked” could result in social isolation from friends, bullying, and unwelcome
sexual solicitations. Further, in cases where such content might have been shared as the result
of revenge, it could certainly lead to violence. Aside from issues reputation and social issues,
sending, receiving, and/or sharing this type of content could lead to disciplinary action by
schools, employers, and possibly even state and federal law enforcement. Most importantly,
what might start out as a fleeting and thoughtless lapse of judgement could lead to serious
emotional and self-esteem issues for any child or young adult.

Recognizing if Sexting has become a problem with your teen

Short of concrete evidence (or concerns voiced by your teen, their friends, their teachers, or
law enforcement officials), the best way of recognizing any problems with your child is to
communicate with them. Knowing what your child is up to and paying attention to their moods
and behavior is essential. A parent con usually tell (“sense”) when something is amiss. If the
lines of communication are already open, then exploring what may be wrong will be an easier
conversation. Some common signs might include mood swings, changes in weight and
appetite, lapses in personal hygiene, or a new found fascination with morbid or offbeat topics
or entertainment. These, of course, are common examples, but each child may react
differently. Just remember that communication with your child is essential and can help
prevent a potential problem or mitigate the damage of a problem that has already started.

What to do if you discover your child is involved in a situation

involving sexting…
While it is often easier said than done, controlling your emotions is essential. While situations
involving sexting can vary tremendously in terms of the harm that they can cause, it is hard to
imagine a scenario where a parent would not be very upset to learn of their child’s involvement
in such a case. Despite a parent’s anger, fear, concern (or all of the above), remember that
communication will be required in order to address the issue. If a child feels further threatened
or isolated by their parents in such a situation, they may be much less likely to share further
details about the situation out of fear of further reprisal.

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 In any situation that presents a potential threat to the safety and health of anyone involved, a
parent should immediately contact the appropriate medical and law enforcement officials in
their area. If the nature of the threat is less severe, then recruiting the support of key advisors,
family members, friends, coaches, teachers, etc. might be a good place to start. Also,
depending on the situation, you might find it appropriate to discuss the situation with any other
parents or parties involved.
Again, it is imperative to understand that you are the parent and that this is a time when your
child will be coming to you for guidance and support. Whether your child is the victim or the
victimizer, it is incumbent on you to communicate with your child, assess the situation, and
select a course of action that mitigates the potential for immediate and long-term damage to
the safety and well-being of all parties involved.

Laws that Help

Because technology tends to move faster than the laws that govern it, there has not been a lot
of legal precedent set in this area as of late 2009. Further, and as you might expect, local laws
vary greatly depending on the social and political culture of a given geography or state. For
example, Vermont lawmakers recently introduced a bill that legalized the consentual exchange
of graphic content between teens aged 13-18. However, they made it illegal to share such
[2]
content with an unintended recipient. In Ohio, a new law was recently proposed that would
reduce sexting-related crimes from a felony charge to a misdemeanor. This would prevent
[3]
teens from potentially be labeled ’sex offenders’. Like Ohio, Utah also recently reduced such
crimes to a misdemeanor.[4]
External Resources
 Wikipedia on Sexting
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexting
 CBS News: “Sexting” Shockingly Common Among Teens
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/01/15/national/main4723161.shtml
 ABC News: Sexting Teens Can Go to Far
http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/WorldNews/story?id=6456834

References
1 “Sex and Tech (PDF)” The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy. (12-
10-2008).
2 “Vermont Considers Legalizing Teen ‘Sexting’” , Associated Press (Apr. 13, 2009).
3 “Ohio to address ’sexting’ laws“, WKYC-TV (Apr. 13, 2009).
4 “Utah lawmakers OK bill on ’sexting’“, Associated Press (Mar. 11, 2009).

Terms Associated with ‘Sexting’

sexting, sex text message, sms, mms, mesaging, pic, vid

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Internet Addiction
Definition & Background
An Internet addiction is an addiction like any other: it is defined by a compulsive loss of impulse
control resulting in damage to the user and his or her relationships, schoolwork, or
employment. Online gaming, compulsive use of social networking, and marathon Internet
surfing sessions are all included in this powerful addition. Symptoms are comparable to other
behavior addictions, most similar to pathological gambling. Because Internet addiction is
relatively new to society, there is less research on it than more established addictions, such as
drug and alcohol abuse. However, researchers believe that like other additions, it often masks
other problems such as depression, low self-esteem, social anxiety and may even stand in a
surrogate for other addictions.

Internet Addiction Statistics

Nearly every study performed on the topic has found not only a direct correlation between age
and Internet addiction, but also one between age and neglect of work. That is to say that
teenagers and young adults are more likely to be addicted to the Internet than any other age
group, and among all people suffering from this addiction, teenagers and young adults are
more likely to neglect work (school or employment) than older adults with similar addictive
behavior. In fact, in the most widely recognized study of its kind, age was the only factor that
was a direct and constant contributor to this addiction across all other factors.[1]
While this may be good news, suggesting that teenagers and young adults might grow out of
their addiction (or reduce their intake) as they age, because this is a new “genre” of behavior,
this data might simply reveal that teenagers and young adults are “early adapters.” What this
means, essentially, is that they may have found this addiction before the rest of the population.

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If this is the case, today’s Internet-Addicted teenagers and young adults may carry it with them
into adulthood. In fact, Stanford University’s School of Medicine found that nearly one in eight
Americans suffers from at least one sign of problematic Internet abuse (although this does not
in and of itself constitute addiction).[2]
Internet abuse is so widespread that the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistic Manual of Mental
Disorders), which is published by the American Psychiatric Association, is reported to be
considering adding it to its next release, alongside such issues as bipolar disorder, schizophrenia
and borderline personality disorders.[3]
Indeed, as children and teenagers are still developing their brains, they may grow accustomed
to the speed and flashy graphics associated with the Internet and actually adapt their
physiology, developing problems such as ADHD, and becoming generally more impatient than
people raised without the instant gratification offered by the Internet.

Harmful Effects
One aspect of Internet addiction, which is statistically slanted toward boys and men, is online
gaming. According to Professor Mark Griffiths, a Psychologist at Nottingham Trent University in
the UK, “Online gaming addiction… is a real phenomenon and people suffer the same
symptoms as traditional addictions.” In one of his surveys, he found users who played online
video games for over 80 hours per week, an amount he called, “excessive.”
Griffiths was asked to comment upon reports that a young man had died of heart failure after
playing video games for 50 straight hours, with only a few brief breaks for the restroom. The
young man in question had been recently fired from his job, due to his inability to tear himself
away from his online games. According to Professor Griffiths, “*The games+ completely engross
the player. They are not games that you can play for 20 minutes and stop.”*4]
For many, time spent on social media sites such as MySpace and Facebook, has the same
deleterious effect on a user’s ability to simply stop. According to Dr. Kimberly Young, Director of
the Center for Internet Addiction Recovery in Bradford, PA, many teenagers have come to
recognize on their own that their Facebook behavior is hurting their grades, college
applications, and social life. However, she warns that withdrawal is difficult as well: “It’s like an
eating disorder. You can’t eliminate food. You just have to make better choices about what you
eat… and what you do online.”
Nonetheless, for many, the addiction is highly emotional, especially for those unsure of their
place in the world or just in their social circles. As Rachel Simmons, an educator who wrote
“The Curse of the Good Girl: Raising Authentic Girls with Courage and Confidence” explained,
“You’re getting a feed of everything everyone is doing and saying… You’re literally watching the
social landscape on the screen, and if you’re obsessed with your position in that landscape, it’s
very hard to look away.”
That said, many teens have come up with their own coping strategies, such as deactivating their
accounts, or giving a trusted friend or sibling a password, and only allowing themselves access
once in a while. Others are entering into social pacts with friends to not use the site. [5]
In addition to the psychological, physiological, social, and mental health problems associated
with Internet Addiction, children and teenagers who spend too many hours online are simply

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 not exercising their minds and bodies at a crucial time in their lives, when they should be
engaging in sports and other age-appropriate physical activities with like-minded peers.

Recognizing Computer Addiction Symptoms in your teen

While cause and effect is still being established, researchers have known for at least 14 years
that heavy Internet users risk losing a significant other, job, school, or career opportunity
because they prefer spending time on the Internet to more social interaction. According to one
self test available (see: External Resources), symptoms of Internet Addiction include:
 Failed attempts to control behavior
 A heightened sense of euphoria while involved in computer and Internet activities
 Neglecting friends and family
 Neglecting sleep to stay online
 Being dishonest with others
 Feeling guilty, ashamed, anxious, or depressed as a result of online behavior
 Physical changes such as weight gain or loss, backaches, headaches, or carpal tunnel
syndrome, and
 Withdrawing from other pleasurable activities

Helping Your Child Overcome an Online Addiction

As with any withdrawal, weaning your child off the Internet will be painful for him or her – and
as you might imagine, your teen might make it as difficult as possible for you, in an attempt to
dissuade you from trying to change his or her behavior. Start by limiting the amount of time
your child spends online. If he or she is accustomed to spending eight hours per weeknight on
the Internet, try limiting use in the first week to six hours per night and working steadily down.
Encourage your teen to go to social events and plan play dates for your younger children.
If you, yourself, spend too much time on the Internet, this can be a great opportunity to
introduce family outings and activities. Read to your younger children instead of letting them
idle away on the Internet. If forcing your child to stop abusing their time on the Internet causes
serious distress, take them to a licensed therapist. They may well be suffering from other
emotional problems which their Internet use has masked. But mostly, remember that of all the
addictions out there, an Internet Addiction is not the worst, and with love and attention from
you, your child can and will learn to disengage – even if it takes some time.

External Resources
 Self-diagnostic test (or you can take on behalf of your child / teen)
http://www.warningsigns.info/computer_addiction.htm
 Net Addiction
http://www.netaddiction.com
 Wikipedia on Internet Addiction
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_Addiction
 Your child’s school psychologist or counselor

References
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1. “The Psychometric Properties of the Internet Addiction Test”
CyberPsychology & Behavior Volume 7, Number 4, Page 449. Laura Widyanto, Ph.D. and Mary
McMurran, Ph.D. 2004.
2. Net Addiction
http://www.netaddiction.com
3. “Issues for DSM-V: Internet Addiction”
Jerald J. Block, M.D. American Psychiatric Association. March 2008.
http://ajp.psychiatryonline.org/cgi/content/full/165/3/306?nl_id=1195
4. “S Korean dies after games session”
BBC News. 10 August 2005.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/technology/4137782.stm
5. “To Deal With Obsession, Some Defriend Facebook”
Katie Hafner. The New York Times. 21 December, 2009.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/21/technology/Internet/

Terms Associated with ‘Internet Addiction’

pew internet study, always online, MySpace addiction, Facebook addiction

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Kids and Online Commerce
Definition & Background
Kids and Online Commerce refers to any situation where children make monetary transactions
online. This includes purchasing items off Craigslist.com (which may not require a bank
account), selling or auctioning items, using a credit or debit card to buy items from online
sellers or retailers, and participating in online sites requiring payment (including gambling
websites). In order to shop online, one must have access to a computer and either a bank
account, online payment account, debit card, or credit card.
By law, one must be at least 18 years old to have his or her own credit card. However, those
under 18 can be added as a user to an adult’s account. PayPal offers a service to enable teens
to have their own accounts under adult supervision as well.
Online Banking is another facet of e-commerce, enabling simplified access between accounts,
the ability to manage investment portfolios (which rarely applies to children) and visibility into
most non-cash monetary transactions.

Data & Research

According to a report entitled “The Teens Market in the U.S.” teen shopping grows by
[1]
approximately 3.5% annually and is forecast to climb to $91.1 billion in 2011.
WeeWorld, a popular avatar video game, conducted a survey and found that “when it comes to
spending online, 34% of teens are willing to spend online for ‘anything fun’ while 22% will
spend online in order to express themselves. Girls are generally more interested in buying
[2]
goods online to express themselves, 24% as opposed to 17% of boys.”

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Market researchers conduct studies on the buying habits of kids and teens. ClickZ, a website
made for digital marketers, also provides information and statistics about online commerce.

Similarities & Differences to Offline Behavior

Kids and young adults are heavily targeted by marketers and often seek to purchase toys and
objects they perceive to be important to their personal and social development. Online
marketing can be narrowly targeted, and thus be more effective. Search engines and online
vendors will remember prior purchases, or simply what one has searched for.
The primary difference between buying something online and from a paper catalog is the ease
of use and the threat of identity theft, which can quickly lead to a weakened credit score and.
Making purchases online can be quick and easy because software, online stores, and PayPal
save credit card and billing information. Whereas prior to online commerce, a child could sneak
a twenty dollar bill out of a parent’s wallet when no one was looking, today a child can
memorize credit card information and use it without being asked for identification.
In addition to now being able to buy everything online that one previously bought offline, there
are a number of items sold online that do not exist offline, thus increasing the number of ways
youth can spend money. These items include domain names (eg. yourname.com), membership
to video game sites (e.g. Club Penguin), access to premium content on a website, and virtual
goods (e.g. many social networks and online games allow you to buy enhancements,
customizations, and virtual gifts). Prescription drugs can also be more easily purchased online,
as a prescription is often not necessarily required if sold through an international pharmacy.
Just as it makes purchasing easier, the Internet also facilitates the act of selling, which can
foster both productive and unproductive behavior. It’s as easy for a teen (perhaps even easier)
to navigate eBay.com, Etsy.com, or Craigslist.org as it is for their parents. Children might be
encouraged to develop entrepreneurial skills, even selling goods or services from their own
websites. Other ways kids and teens might make money online include gold mining (obtaining
and selling virtual weapons and currency in video games), selling advertisement space on blogs,
[3]
or as a creative twist, using YouTube to help sell Girl Scout cookies.

Harmful Effects
The most harmful effects with regard to online commerce are overspending, getting scammed,
damaging the card holder’s credit score, and breaking the law by purchasing prohibited items.
One example of online fraud is phishing: the criminally fraudulent process of attempting to
acquire sensitive information such as usernames, passwords and credit card details by
masquerading as a trustworthy entity in an electronic communication. Some laws are easily
transgressed online, such as lying about one’s age to gain access to a site, using someone else’s
credit card, and illegally downloading music, movies, or software.
E-commerce also opens opportunities for kids to communicate with and meet strangers.

Recognizing the Abuse of Online Commerce

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 How each family discusses managing money is a personal decision, but those conversations
should address issues specific to the Internet. Familiar problems like overspending are joined
by new ones like identity theft and Internet scams. Parents should stay abreast of topics as
they arise in the news and in the lives of their children.
In the case of illegal downloading, Internet service providers might contact the account holder
if they have been alerted that illegal file sharing has occurred.

Tips for Safe Online Commerce

 Be vigilant for unauthorized credit card use and identity theft by regularly checking bills and
credit scores.
 Where possible, use a secure online payment service like PayPal or WorldPay.
 Use credit cards rather than debit cards.
 Don’t keep your personal or financial information (including account passwords) on your
computer; use a removable storage devices, such as a USB stick.
 Don’t give out personal or financial information to vendors over the phone, through the mail,
or online, unless you are absolutely certain your contact is legitimate.
 Try to make all of your online transactions with one credit card.
 Keep a record of what you pay for and always check your online purchases against your credit
card statement(s).
 Always check the privacy policy of any website that requests personal details. If the website
is requesting this type of information and does not have a privacy policy, it is not wise to
submit your information.
 When submitting information online, make sure there is a “lock” icon on the browser’s status
bar (and that it is “locked”); this tells you that the site is secured.
 Keep your operating system, anti-virus, anti-spyware and firewall software up-to-date. [4]

Laws that Help

 Ryan Haight Online Pharmacy Consumer Protection Act of 2008
 Controlled Substances Act

External Resources
 Media Awareness Network
http://www.media-awareness.ca
 Wired Safety
http://www.wiredsafety.org

References
1 “ECommerce-Guide Essentials“, ecommerce-guide.com.
2 “WeeWorld Survey Says Teen Spending On The Rise“, virtualgoodsnews.com (Jul. 7, 2009).
3 “The Girls Scouts Are Old School – Stop Cyber Cookie Promoting“, babble.com (Mar. 13,
2009).

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4 “Information on personal information safety“, wiredsafety.org
5 “Controlled Substances Act“, wikipedia.org

Terms Associated with Kids and Online Commerce

identity theft, secure website, encryption, gold mining, phishing, scam, PayPal, e-commerce,
torrent, privacy

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Online Reputation
Definition & Background
As with any reputation, an child online reputation formed during one’s adolescence can haunt
for years to come. It is imperative that you and your child have an open conversation about the
possible repercussions of Internet interaction before any lasting damage occurs.

Data and Research

While most future employers are apt to excuse your son or daughter for teenage follies, not all
are guaranteed to be understanding or forgiving. Content posted to the Internet does not
usually “expire”, so forming good online habits and a good online reputation is essential. These
habits should start early, and will be more likely to become ingrained in your child.
Several recent studies have outlined the harmful effects of inappropriate online content. A
study of hiring managers conducted in June 2009 found that 45% did online background checks
using Google and other search engines (more than double the 22% who did so last year), and of
those, a full 35% had disregarded a candidate based upon online content found in a search. The
job-forfeiting content included provocative or inappropriate photographs or information (53%),
content involving drugs or alcohol (44%), and numerous instances of work-related information
being over-shared.[1]
Most notably, the survey found that the number of employers researching candidates online
had not only doubled from the previous year, but that another 11% planned to begin doing so
in the near future. In some industries, as many as 63% of employers were screening potential
candidates online, including searching for their blogs and even following them on Twitter. [2]
At this rate, by the time your child reaches adulthood (or even their first after-school or
summer job), it seems likely that nearly every employer will use these techniques to help filter

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candidates, and with an already competitive job market, your children need to demonstrate
good judgment and propriety online. One employer reported rejecting a candidate after

reading that among his hobbies, he “like(s) to blow things up.”[3] To your child, this might seem
funny or cool. To a potential employer – or college admissions counselor – this is a deal-

breaker .
Similarities and Differences to Offline Behavior
Unlike with an offline reputation, where memories fade over time, an online reputation is quite
literally a permanent record, with content displayed in forever, often even information you’ve
tried to remove. An off-the-cuff remark is likely to be forgotten in time, but photos, videos and
online content can remain indefinitely. Children today simply don’t view privacy in the same
way as those who didn’t grow up communicating and sharing via the Internet. Many feel
compelled, via peer pressure or societal norms, to share intimate details of their lives online,
and as such, with perfect strangers.

Harmful Effects
In addition to impacting educational, career, and social prospects, from an outside perspective,
a bad online reputation can have a harmful effect on one’s self-esteem. There have been
several high-profile cases where online harassment, and the resulting sense of an irrevocably
tarnished reputation, resulted in personal tragedy.[4]
While instances like these are extreme, and hopefully rare in occurrence, it is not uncommon
for online content to be taken wildly out of context and either be harmful from an external or
personal perspective. You would be wise to discuss this with your child well before their online
behavioral habits are formed.

Recognizing a Problematic Online Reputation

You should regularly perform a search of your child online and see what appears in the results.
If your child has a common name, you may need to sift through the data (or add additional
search terms like city, nicknames, etc.) to find out which references pertain to your child and
which may relate to someone else entirely. If possible, ask to see their Facebook and MySpace
accounts – or become their online friend – and see what they have posted. Do you see the
normal musings of a child or teenager? Are there provocative photos, statements, or videos?
Does your child maintain a blog, or do his / her friends, and what does it say? Does it contain
identifying information, such as their school or your town, city, or state? Once you find the
content (and chances are nearly certain that there is some), you need to evaluate what you’re
looking at and decide if this is acceptable to you and your family.

Remedying A Poor Online Reputation

Unfortunately, some parents will learn that their children have already developed a poor or
questionable online reputation – either through their own actions or those of their friends and
peers. If you find yourself in this situation, don’t panic. There are a number of steps you can
take to remedy the situation and reinstate your child’s good standing online.

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First, now that you’ve identified the sources, catalogue them so you can remedy them one by
one. If your child is the one who has posted the content, this is actually helpful, as it gives you
more control over the content and you can remove it more easily. This includes blog postings,
status messages, tweets (from Twitter), pictures, videos, and links on Facebook or MySpace,
pictures on blogs or photo sharing sites, videos on YouTube or Google Video, and content and
media on personal blogs and personal websites.
While it can take a few weeks for Google to remove references to this content from its search
results, you can immediately remove access to it from anyone who may have saved direct links
(and hope the information hasn’t been duplicated elsewhere).
Next, find out where the other content is located. If it’s on the website or Facebook / MySpace
page of a friend or classmate of your child, have your child gently ask his / her friend to remove
it. If they refuse, talk to their parents or the principal at their school. School administrators and
staff are often trained to be attuned to problems like this and are likely to be helpful and
sympathetic. If that isn’t the case at your child’s school, don’t hesitate to escalate the issue. Go
to the school district, or speak directly with the website that is hosting the content. Most of the
top trafficked sites hosting this kind of content have strict policies regarding privacy and terms
of use issues. If you contact them with your concerns, they are often responsive about getting
content removed. If that does not work, you can always contact your internet service provider
(ISP) and let them know there is inappropriate content involving minors that needs to be
removed immediately. Let them know that if they do not do so, you will involve an attorney or
the police. Even if you don’t intend to go down this path (and most will not), the threat is
usually enough to stimulate immediate action.
Next, help your child navigate and tighten the privacy settings on his or her Facebook account.
Restrict viewing of their page to friends-only, and check back regularly to ensure that they
haven’t opened viewing to the general public.
Lastly, know that while a lot of content stays on the web, it’s possible to bury it underneath
“good” content. Does your family maintain a blog? Can you write a few wholesome stories?
What about family photos depicting your child in an age-appropriate fashion? Encourage your
child to upload family photos and innocuous photos with friends, attending school events and
participating in sports teams into their Facebook accounts.
Once you and your child establish good online habits, they’re easy to maintain, and with time, it
will take a pretty determined sleuth to find older content buried beneath the more recently
updated, and more appropriate, information.

Legal Remedies
While there aren’t many laws to specifically address the issue of online reputations, there are
resources out there to help. Cyber-bullying laws are becoming more prevalent throughout the
nation, as lawmakers work to fine-tune the legal system especially following Megan Meier’s
suicide. Additionally, the Child Online Protection Act seeks to protect children from viewing
unwanted content, which could include inappropriate content involving your minor child.
Internet service providers are usually eager to work with parents if it means removing
inappropriate content involving a minor.

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 External Resources
 Child Online Protection Act
http://epic.org/free_speech/censorship/copa.html
 Your local police department and/or school district

References
1 “Forty-five Percent of Employers Use Social Networking Sites to Research Job Candidates“, Career
Builder, (Aug. 19, 2009)

2 Ibid.

3 “For Some, Online Persona Undermines a Résumé“, New York Times, (Jun. 11, 2006)

4 “Parents: Cyber Bullying Led to Teen’s Suicide“, ABCNews.com, (Nov. 19, 2007)

Terms Associated with Online Reputation

rep, reputation, status, troll, tag, cyberbully, pedo

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Teens and Mobile Phones
Definition & Background
Many kids and teens today have their own mobile phones to use for social, family, and
professional purposes. Mobile phones are equipped to send/receive phone calls and text
messages. ”Smart” phones or PDAs and other devices also enable you to access the Internet,
take/send photos/videos, play games, listen to music, use a calculator, alarm clock, and
calendar, not to mention the thousands of apps that offer a growing array of services.
Text messaging has many functions, even those with a typical 160 character limit. By sending
one text message to your Twitter account, you can immediately update all of your followers
(those who have elected to receive mobile updates). Or, you can vote on your favorite
American Idol. You can also send a text message to GOOGL (56656) with search queries, such
as looking up the definition of a word.
Many teens use a mobile phone as a part of a family plan, where the bill is sent to one person in
a household or family. However, teens are able to procure their own mobile phones without
committing to a contract by purchasing a prepaid phone.
The function of mobile phones in our lives is likely to keep expanding, as mobile phone
companies are looking to sell more goods and services through the phone, where the buyer
would pay for the goods along with the monthly mobile phone bill.

Data & Research

Teenagers have previously lagged behind adults in their ownership of mobile phones, but
several years of survey data collected by the Pew Internet & American Life Project show that
those ages 12-17 are closing the gap in mobile phone ownership. The Project first began

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surveying teenagers about their mobile phones in its 2004 Teens and Parents project when a
survey showed that 45% of teens had a mobile phone. Since that time, mobile phone use has
climbed steadily among teens ages 12 to 17 – to 63% in fall of 2006 to 71% in early 2008.
In comparison, 77% of all adults (and 88% of parents) had a mobile phone or other mobile
device at a similar point in 2008. mobile phone ownership among adults has since risen to 85%,
based on the results of our most recent tracking survey of adults conducted in April 2009. [1]
The mobile phone has become a primary mode of socializing for teens and they will often avoid
contact with peers that don’t have mobile phones, according to a study by Context. [2]
And almost everyone, including those whom the Context study considers moderate cell-phone
users, felt anxious during the “deprivation” phase of the study that required them to give up
their phones for a few days.

Harmful Effects
Mobile phone use has several potential costs: financial, academic, social, and health.
Aside from using more minutes than allocated in your mobile phone plan, extra text messages
(both sent and received) can quickly add to your bill.
Some schools limit or restrict the use of mobile phones. Schools set restrictions because of the
use of mobile phones for cheating on tests, harassing other people, causing threats to the
schools security, and facilitating gossip and other social activity in school.
Some teens text message so much (200+ texts/day) that they have developed physical
symptoms, Texting Teen Tendonitis (TTT). So much texting can lead to pain in the hands, back
and neck soreness from poor posture while texting, impaired vision, and, possibly, many years
down the line, to arthritis. [3]
One study found that teenagers who excessively use their mobile phone are more prone to
disrupted sleep, restlessness, stress and fatigue. [4] Another found that mobile phone addiction
can result in psychological disorders. [5]
Because mobile phones emit electromagnetic radiation, concerns have been raised about
cancer risks that may pose when used for long periods of time. The current consensus view of
the scientific and medical communities is that health effects are very unlikely to be caused by
cellular phones or their base stations. At the same time, cellular phones became widely
available only relatively recently, while tumors can take decades to develop. For this reason,
some health authorities have urged that the precautionary principle be observed,
recommending that use and proximity to the head be minimized, especially by children. [6]

Recognizing if cellphone addiction has become a problem

Parents and their teens need to negotiate what is an acceptable amount of time and money
spent on mobile phones. When a parent gives their child a mobile phone, there is usually a
monthly plan that provides a structure for how many day time minutes and text messages are
available. If a parent is paying the bill, they have access to the mobile phone records, which
tracks how often teens call and send messages, and to what numbers. Teens should know that
parents have access to this information, and know their parents’ expectations for acceptable
use.

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While the mobile phone bill provides some information about mobile phone use, other factors
effect teens’ experiences on the phone. Because researchers continue to study the harmful
effects of mobile phone use, it’s not always clear when a symptom can be traced to the mobile
phone. A teen could become depressed, for example, for a number of reasons. The best way
to recognize if mobile phones have caused any problems in your teen’s life is to speak openly.

What to do if you discover a problem?

Mobile phones have an important function in many people’s daily lives and it’s hard for us to
imagine curtailing our dependence on them. Therefore, it might not be advisable to ban your
child’s mobile phone, which could lead to social isolation. The goal is to establish healthy
habits. Time spent on mobile phones, while useful and fun, is time not spent focusing on other
important activities, such as studying, working, and improving mental and physical health.
It’s important to recognize that although mobile phones provide us with the ability to seek
social contact and feedback at any hour of the day, it might be a worthwhile idea to spend time
“offline” and to realize that our time might be well spent alone. In the same vein, parents
might rely to heavily on mobile phone to communicate with their children, contacting them too
much, in the place of a face to face conversation.
If your teen is encountering problems from mobile phone use, a collaborative conversation
about self-reliance and independence from socializing might lead them to seek activities that
free their hands from their phones. Ultimately, decreasing mobile phone use might actually be
a relatively easy fix to problems.

Laws Protecting Your Child

Some states outlaw using mobile phones while driving.
Most recently, New York City passed a law that fines people whose mobile phones ring in
“places of public performance.” [7]
Law enforcement and intelligence services in the UK and the US possess technology to remotely
activate the microphones in mobile phones in order to listen to conversations that take place
nearby the person who holds the phone.

References
1 “Teens and Mobile Phones Data Memeo“, pewinternet.org (Aug. 19, 2009)
2 “She’s Gotta Have It: mobile phone“, wired.com (May 16, 2003)
3 “Many Young People Suffer from ‘Teen Texting Tendonitis’“, associatedcontent.com (Jul. 22,
2009)
4 “Excessive Mobile Phone Use Affects Sleep In Teens, Study Finds“, sciencedaily.com (Jun. 9,
2008)
5 “Mobile-phone addiction in teenagers may cause severe psychological disorders“, news-
medical.net (Feb. 27, 2007)
6 “Mobile Phone: Privacy“, wikipedia.org
7 “She’s Gotta Have It: Cell phone“, wired.com (May 16, 2003)

Terms Associated with mobile phones

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carrier, SIM card, text message, texting, T9 predictive text, sms, smart phone, personal digital
assistant, PDA, Sidekick, Twitter, bluetooth, app, Skype

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Bad Online Content
Definition & Background
Bad content online includes any online material that has the ability to negatively influence kids
and/or teenagers (e.g. Adult Websites, Violent Websites Morbid Content, Shocker Content).
This contrasts with the majority of content available online which aims to at least be
entertaining, or at best can teach children valuable information and skills.
Bad content can also include violent video games, hate sites, sites that seek to mislead or
“brainwash”, and commercial sites that seek to scam youth. Negative content can be sought
[1]
out by kids or found inadvertently through search queries, pop-ups, and spam. Videos of
shocking content can spread like wildfire online and often get shared by peers in group settings
just to see what kind of reactions they elicit. It is also common for teens to actually post video
responses expressing their reactions (sometimes humorous, often disgusted, offended, and at
times offensive) to shocking content.

Data & Research

Researchers have long studied the effects of video games and television, and in the last decade
have studied both positive and negative effects that the Internet can have on youth. Most
research on kids’ Internet habits are conducted by market analysis groups, which is often not
publicly-accessible.
In one study by Finkelhor, Mitchell, and Wolak, they found that 25% of respondents (ages 10-
17) reported receiving unwanted exposure to sexual materials while online, while 19% received

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a sexual solicitation online. More of their research can be found at the Crimes Against Children
[2]
Research Center.
Advocacy organizations like the Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood (CCFC) argue that
exposure to marketing exploits children’s developmental vulnerabilities. A recent British study
found that “the pressure to consume and conform can lead to excessive levels of materialism
and competition among children leading to bullying.” CCFC also argues that marketing is a
[3]
factor in the childhood obesity epidemic.

Similarities & Differences to Offline Behavior

While media and entertainment have long been sources of debate in terms of how to manage
content appropriate for children, the Internet provides access to a significantly broader range
of information and sources that is difficult to restrict by law. Anonymity and message boards
can also adversely affect the way information is presented and spread on the Internet.
Internet users randomly stumble upon bad content online, even when they are not seeking it.
Even e-mail spam may contain sexually explicit content.

Harmful Effects
Exposure to inappropriate material whether online or off has the potential to become harmful
and lead to psychological and social problems for children and teens. It’s difficult to measure
the effects exposure to pornography, for example, has on child development. Other harmful
effects that negative content online can lead to are isolation, Internet addiction, and phobias.
Online communities frequently share information anonymously, which can aid or provoke
dangerous behaviors, such as eating disorders, self-injurious behaviors, suicide, hacking, and
other illegal acts.
Online fora are generally open to the public, but tend to attract a self-selecting crowd, thus
narrowing the range of opinions. It may be difficult, and in some cases, harmful, for young
people who are still developing reading and reasoning skills to navigate so much information
without the guidance of a teacher or adult.

Recognizing if it has become a problem with your teen

Curiosity in age-inappropriate topics may signal that your child has found online material
harmful or confusing. Bad content and negative online experiences can be responsible for
depression, delinquency, and substance use.
Some common signs might include mood swings, changes in weight and appetite, lapses in
personal hygiene, or a newfound fascination with morbid or offbeat topics or entertainment.
These, of course, are common examples, but each child may react differently.

How to minimize your child’s exposure to bad content

It’s important for parents to reflect with their children on what constitutes bad content and
harm. Acknowledging the presence of harmful content with your child opens a platform for

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 conversation if and when your child comes into contact with it. Without such dialogue,
whether or not material is harmful can seem ambiguous to your child.
Although adult content sites require visitors to certify they are above the age of 18, the onus of
responsibility lies on the visitor. As a response to the breadth of content on the web, some
parents resort to preventative measures, such as installing software that restricts access. While
these may work on a home computer, a savvy teen can often circumvent the software or just
use another computer or network.
Teenagers may resist restrictions on Internet usage and find ways around them, so it’s
advisable to ask them for their thoughts on the range of content available online and encourage
using the Internet in positive, safe ways.

Laws that Help

 Communications Decency Act
The Communications Decency Act imposes criminal sanctions on anyone who “knowingly uses
any interactive computer service to display in a manner available to a person under 18 years
of age, any comment, request, suggestion, proposal, image, or other communication that, in
context, depicts or describes, in terms patently offensive as measured by contemporary
community standards, sexual or excretory activities or organs.”
 Child Online Protection Act
The Child Online Protection Act aimed to restrict access to pornography, but deemed
unconstitutional, not in effect.
 Cyberlaw
Cyberlaw is a term that encapsulates the legal issues related to use of communicative,
transactional, and distributive aspects of networked information devices and technologies.

External Resources
 Wired Safety
http://www.wiredsafety.org
 Crimes Against Children Research Center
http://www.unh.edu/ccrc
 Berkman Center for Internet and Society
http://cyber.law.harvard.edu
 Media Awareness Network
http://www.media-awareness.ca
 Child Safety on the Information Highway
http://www.safekids.com

References
1 “Children’s Positive and Negative Experiences With the Internet – PDF” by Valkenburg and
Soeters (Oct. 2001)
2 “Children’s exposure to negative Internet content: effects of family context” Journal of

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Broadcasting & Electronic Media (Dec. 1, 2005)
3 “Let’s Rewrite the Rules for Kids’ Media” – BusinessWeek.com (Feb. 28, 2008)

Terms Associated with ‘Bad Content Online’

porn, shocker, xxx, p0rn

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Online Friends
Definition & Background
The Internet makes information easily transmittable amongst both strangers and acquaintances
for business, educational, and social purposes. In the earliest days of the Internet, affinity
groups quickly formed around common interests; the ability to communicate with others in the
group was made possible through message boards, chat rooms, and newsletters.
Soon after, Social Networks (many consider Friendster to be the original) were created to
enable real life friends to share information and interact on the Internet, and potentially to
expand personal networks through mutual friends. However, the need for actual friendship or
even a common friend was soon trumped by the perceived prestige of having a large online
community, resulting in the tendency for people to become “friends” with people they had
never met.
The term Online Friends can be used to describe the presence of a real life friend in one’s
virtual (online) community, or to describe people who interact online but who may not have
met in person. It’s common for social networking sites to facilitate “friending” – the act of
becoming part of one’s online network – through searches or browsing of other community
members. While most social networking websites require that online friendships be mutually
agreed upon – that is, the sites are set up so that one person requests the friendship and the
other approves it – it is not uncommon to receive friend requests from complete strangers.
It is possible that Online Friends never interact, as having the illusion of a large friend network
is all that some people seek. However, that does not necessarily mean it’s a harmless
situation. When people allow others into their online community, they are giving them access
to personal information which may including photos, videos, schools, hobbies and details such

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 as their address or phone number. With all of this information, an immoral person would be
armed to do tremendous harm.
A reference to one’s Online Friend can represent a variety of realities:
 “Suzy from school is my friend on facebook.”
 “ilovebacon2 is my friend from the online game site; we’ve never met in person but ‘talk’ and
play cards every week.”
 “I received four friend requests today from people I’ve never met.”
It is wise to not make assumptions that Online Friends are all good or all bad. If you are curious
about the origin of your child’s online friendship, it is best to ask.

Data & Research

As participation in online communities has become more common, so has contact and
solicitation by strangers. The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children and Cox
Communicationsreported that over 60% of teens had established a presence on social
networking web pages where they shared photos and personal information. While these
actions may seem harmless in a secure environment, the following statistics reveal that security
and privacy are not the status quo.
 71% of respondents reported receiving messages online from someone they didn’t know
 45% of respondents have been asked for personal information by someone they didn’t know
 30% of respondents have considered meeting someone that they’ve only talked to online
 14% of respondents have actually met a person they’ve only spoken to over the Internet (9%
of 13-15s; 22% of 16-17s)
 Nearly half of respondents who received online messages from someone they didn’t know,
[1]
reported that they’ll usually reply and chat with that person

Surprising Differences to Offline Behavior

Even prior to the Internet it was observed that people feel safer using written messages than
they do using the telephone or speaking in person. Studies have shown that people are more
willing to type secrets into a computer than they are to tell them out-loud to somebody. This
sentiment – and practice – has become more prevalent as communicating through the Internet
has replaced interpersonal interaction. In a study of 16,000 MySpace users between the ages of
14 and 21, over a third of respondents revealed that they find it easier to talk to online buddies
than to people out in the “real world”. Respondents reported feeling closer to their Online
Friends than offline ones, since they had much more frequent contact and more insight into
each other’s lives. Thus, it can be extrapolated that the ease of sharing information enabled by
technology, and the candor generated by using the Internet as a medium, results in people
sharing more with an Online Friend who they don’t know well than they would if they
[2]
interacted with this individual in person.
While this would not be a problem if one’s online friends were in fact people they knew outside
the Internet, we know this is not the case. Even more harmful is the fact that the sharing of
personal information can be further exaggerated with Online Friends who began as online

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 strangers. While there may be a sense of friendship or trust with one’s new Online Friend, the
use of written communication, and the fact that they have not met in person act as a
‘protective’ shield, opening the door for more candid dialogue. It is through this frank dialogue
that strangers can extract personal information from an unwitting new Online Friend.

Harmful Effects
While the practice of engaging in and maintaining friendships online shouldn’t yield harm, the
reality can be much different. Firstly, even if one only engages with “real world” friends, simply
having a presence on these Online Social Networking sites puts their personal information on
the Internet. While one can try to control the information they share with others, they cannot
control information or potentially damaging content such as photos or videos posted to the
Internet by other people. Additionally, the ability to ‘tag’ content – to label it with the names of
the individuals in it – can draw a straight line back to an individual. It can sometimes seem
impossible to prevent others from sharing one’s name or image.
It has also been widely argued that the rampant use of technology as a communication medium
[3]
between friends is resulting in poor interpersonal skills and less developed writing skills.
Helping Children Manage Their Online Friends
It would be nearly impossible (and ill-advised) to try and keep your child off of Social
Networking sites (or anything similar that may emerge) and to prevent them from interacting
with their friends through the Internet. Therefore, educating your child about potential risks,
and how to safely manage their online image and privacy, seems to be the better approach.
The following recommended steps can help with keeping your children safe online:
 Speak with your child and find out which Social Networks they are part of, or want to be part
of.
 Find out which Social Networks their friends are part of.
 Ask them who their Online Friends are, and how they know them.
 Ask if you might be part of their Online Network. In addition to giving you first-hand insight
into the information they are posting about themselves and information and content posted
by others, you will be able to understand the dynamics of the particular site and to see how
common it is to be contacted by strangers online.
 With younger children – particularly ones who are curious to begin interacting with their
friends online – you may require that they let you co-manage their Online Network and
consult with you prior to adding new friends to their network.
 Remind your children that they cannot fully control their online image, but they can take
preventative steps by controlling who they directly share information with.
 Help your children navigate the security settings on their Social Networks, and encourage
them to minimize the amount of information they make publicly available.
 Advise your children to not enter chat rooms, or to engage in any conversations over the
Internet with people they don’t know, regardless of how harmless it might seem.

External Resources

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 Wired Safety
http://www.wiredsafety.org
 Wikipedia List of Social Network Sites
http://en.wikipedia.org

References
1 “Teen Internet Safety Survey” National Center for Missing & Exploited Children and Cox
Communications, 2006. Retrieved 11-16-2009
2 “Your “Real” Friends are Your Online Friends” Sarah Perez, ReadWriteWeb, August 10, 2009.
Retrieved 11-16-2009
3 “Study Shows Online Social Networking Could Hurt Social Skills” Luke Dimik,
CentralMichiganLife, November 13, 2009.

Terms Associated with ‘Online Friends’

friending, fans, network, social network

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Online Photos and Videos
Definition & Background
Online photos and videos are media produced in digital form and made available on the
Internet via websites, blogs, social networking sites, photo/video sharing sites, or email. The
key difference between online media and offline media is that online media can be easily
copied, shared, and downloaded.
There are two types of online photos and videos with which you as a parent need to concern
yourself:
 Inappropriate content your child may be viewing, including pornography, violence, foul
language and gestures, and material that is simply not age appropriate.
 Photos and videos featuring your child, posted either by your child or by someone else
(including members of your family).

Similarities and Differences to Offline / Non-Digital Media

As with regular videos and pictures, digital media can range from completely innocuous to
wildly inappropriate, depending on what is captured. However, the digital nature of media
today can create issues:
 It can be digitally altered to suggest that your child has participated in an unsavory activity –
or in a worst-case scenario, in a pornographic situation.
 It can be spread virally – a term used to describe the way information or media is
disseminated from one person to many – and be easily shared with unintended recipients.

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Data and Research
In 2006, 34% of children aged 10 – 17 responded in a national survey that they had
inadvertently viewed unsolicited sexual content. (This does not take into account those who
were pleased to see, or or even sought out, such material.) Four percent of the respondents
aged 10 – 17 had received direct solicitations for sexually explicit or nude photographs. In that
same year, 61% of teenagers aged 13 – 17 reported that they had a social networking page or a
personal blog, with 37% of those teens saying they were unconcerned with what strangers
might do with such information.[1]

Mitigating Harm from External Sources

Some parents seek to reduce exposure to or sharing of unwanted media is through the use of
internet filtering software at the home. While this may help with part of the problem, blocking
only works on a computer-by-computer basis; it is not effective on mobile devices and other
computers children may have access to. Further, blocking may:
 Give parents the misguided perception that the risk of exposure related to viewing and
sharing questionable media online has been averted. At best it may only be mildly
mitigated from the home.
 Contribute to an adversarial and/or dishonest relationship between parents and children.
 Hinder open communication between parents and children, which is proven to be the most
important aspect of of keeping your children safe both online and off.
 As for the problem of children publishing too much written or visual information, the best
solution is to discuss with your children the potential repercussions of sharing such
information, and to monitor their activity so that you know what they’re doing online.
Although this may make some parents uneasy, protecting your children is your obligation, and
direct communication doesn’t always reveal the most accurate information. Consider that
roughly 75% of parents whose children, age nine and older, use the Internet at home reported
that they know “a lot” about how their kids spend time online, while 33% of teenagers aged 13
[2]
– 17 said that their parents knew very little about what they did online.
Just as you wouldn’t allow your child to spend time elsewhere without you knowing where they
are and what they’re doing, so too should the same rules be applied to the Internet, especially
with respect to the availability of violent and sexually explicit photographs and videos which
propagate the Internet with alarming ease.

The Risks of Posting Photos and Videos Online

You and your child must both be aware that any video or photo posted on the Internet may be
copied and used for nefarious purposes. Consider the case of Jenni Brennan, who maintained a
family blog, happily recording her thriving sons, Jacob and Josh. In August 2009, she received
an email from a woman she had never met, saying that she had viewed an advertisement
featuring Brennan’s nine-month-old son, Jacob, which stated that he was available for
[3]
adoption.

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Another mother, Jessica Gwozdz, found her four year old daughter’s image on a Brazilian social
networking site where participants could vote on how “sexy” she was. This photo was taken
from a free photo sharing site, which had been used by the family to share up-to-date pictures
[4]
with relatives.
Further, many (if not most) universities and companies will conduct online searches for new
applicants. Any information or content about your child that is publicly posted or shared online
will be searchable and discoverable. Needless to say, any questionable content will only go to
hinder their chances of getting into a school or landing a job.
Just as photos can be taken from blogs and photo sharing sites and used elsewhere, a video
uploaded to YouTube or Google Video can be replicated and viewed millions of times by
complete strangers. Moreover, while you might have control of the photos and videos you
personally post, controlling or removing copied images and videos is a nearly impossible task.

Safely Sharing Media

The safest way to ensure that family photos stay private is to only post them on a password-
protected site. Whether you opt for a blog or a picture sharing site, you can create a login and
password that users must have in order to gain access. You can give everyone the same
username and password, which can help with technology-averse relatives and friends.
As to what your children may post, establish ground rules and stick to them. Keep their social
networking pages viewable to friends-only, and monitor what photos and videos they post.
Take down any images you are not expressly comfortable with, such as pictures of them in a
bathing suit. You may chose also to engage the parents of your child’s friends, as you also want
to be cognizant of images and videos being posted by others. If all the parents in your
community are involved in keeping their child’s network free of content that might be tempting
to an ill-meaning individual, all the children, and the community as a whole, will be safer.

Managing Problematic Media

If you are unable to engage your fellow parents in actively controlling the content posted by
their children, take the time to visit your child’s friends’ pages and see if you find media with
your child in it. Should something unseemly involving your child be posted online, don’t be
afraid to ask the parents of the child who posted the content to ensure that all content feature
your child be removed. If you find that a video of your child has been posted to YouTube or
another video-sharing site, first check to see if there are multiple copies, and then contact the
service and ask them to take down those videos. Most content-related web sites have well-
defined terms of use and privacy policies and will respond to such “takedown” requests.
If a photo or video involving your child appears provocative in any way, in addition to taking the
aforementioned steps, immediately contact your local police department, as there are laws
specifically geared toward dealing with this problem. Likewise, if someone has stolen your
photos and is using them for illegal purposes – such as the adoption scam – ask the police how
they can help.

File Types

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 If you decide to search your home computer to look for media files your children may have
downloaded from the Internet or from a digital camera, you can run a search by file type.
Common media file types are .jpg, .jpeg, .png, .bmp, .gif and .psd for photos, and .avi, .mpeg,
.mpg, .mp4 and .mov for online videos.

External Resources
 Wired Safety
http://www.wiredsafety.org
 CNet Reviews
http://reviews.cnet.com/4520-11344_7-6424378-2.html
 Crimes Against Children Research Center
http://www.unh.edu/ccrc

References
1 Online Victimization of Youth: Five Years Later (2006). National Center for Missing & Exploited
Children and Cox Communications, 2006. Retrieved 11-18-2009.
2 Internet Filters Tips. Common Sense Media, 2009. Retrieved 11-18-2009.
3 Netter, Sarah. Mother Horrified Son’s Picture Was Used in Scam on Craigslist. ABC News,
August 4, 2009. Retrieved 11-18-2009.
4 Quenqua, Douglas. Guardians of Their Smiles. New York Times, October 23, 2009. Retrieved
11-18-2009.

Terms Associated with Online Photos and Videos

upload, post, commenting, comment, status update, tag, tagging, vid, video, stream, takedown,
viral

*This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License. To view a copy of this license, visit
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/ or send a letter to Creative Commons, 171 Second Street, Suite 300, San Francisco,
California, 94105, USA.

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