FEATURE:

SEPT
Whats Goin On?
WHATS Things to do
The Magic of
Moments
BOREDOM
BUSTERS
INSIDE: and see nearby.
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2017
R E S O U R C E S , N E W S & I N F O R M AT I O N F O R A D O P T I V E FA M I L I E S I N T E H A M A C O U N T Y

WE HEARD YOU!
Thank you to everyone who responded to the survey!
Based on your responses, we'll be trying out EVENING options for the
Together on Purpose Adoptive Families Group meeting.

This month's group will be held:

Wednesday, September 20 at 6:00PM
at Alternatives to Violence Counseling Center, 20 Antelope Blvd., Red Bluff
(in the same complex as The Copy Center on Rio & Antelope)

All Adoptive Families Welcome!

FREE Childcare Provided on-site Light Refreshments Served

Welcome, Natalie!
Together on Natalie is the driving force FREE $5
STARBUCKS
Purpose is behind our new, improved monthly
excited to Together on Purpose meetings, and
have Natalie she's anxious to hear your feedback on

Peterson
o n b o a r d
to lead the
program!
Natalie is a true
Tehama County girl - the
wife of a logger, mother to two awesome
kids who are growing up WAY too fast,
a yoga instructor, and a professional
wellness coach. In her spare time (!)
Natalie coordinates the Camp HOPE
Program for kids whose lives have been
impacted by domestic violence, sexual
assault or child abuse.
GIFT CARD
what kinds of activities would be valuable
to YOU and YOUR family.
For a sneak peek at the valuable insights
Natalie will be bringing to the program, ... for EVERYBODY that attends
check out her article, "The Magic of the meeting on September 20
Moments", on page 3.
... even the kids!
For the next few months, we'll be trying out (Of course, we'll give the kids' cards to their grown-ups to hold
different meeting times to see what works on to until it's time to spend them.)
for everyone. If you are unable to attend this
month's meeting (announced above) due *Must be a member of a post-adoptive family or family considering,
to scheduling conflicts, please get in touch or in the process of, adopting. Must attend TOP group meeting on
with Natalie at npeterson@atvrb.org to let September 20, 2017. Cards will be distributed at the end of the activity.
One per person per meeting attended.
her know what days and times would make it
easier for you to attend.

Together on Purpose September 2017 1

WHATS GOIN ON?
SEPTEMBER 2017
20 bTogether on Purpose
Adoptive Parents Group
NEW DAY & TIME: Wednesday,
September 20, 6 - 7PM
Alternatives to Violence Counseling
Center, 20 Antelope Blvd., Red Bluff
(on the corner of Antelope Blvd. & Rio
St., in the same complex as the Copy
Center). Come meet Natalie Peterson,
new Together on Purpose program lead
and get in on the ground floor of the
new and improved Together on Purpose.
This is your big chance to tell us what
kind of services YOUR family would find
valuable. Free childcare provided on-
site. All adoptive families welcome. For
more information, call 530-528-0300 or
email npeterson@atvrb.org.
We look forward to seeing you there!
28 bKinship
Support Group (Chico)
Thursday, September 28, 11:30AM - 1PM,
Lilliput Childrens Services, 289 Rio Lindo
Ave. Chico. Come share with other families
in the KSSP group. Lunch will be provided!
Please contact Lilliput at 530-896-1920 or
email chico.office@lilliput.org if you have
any questions.
Getting Your Ducks in a Row:
Creating a Regulating Environment
for Children from Difficult Beginnings
Children from difficult beginnings of abuse, trauma
and attachment challenge have difficulty managing
their emotions.
If you live with one (or more) of them, you know
all about those difficulties. This course will help
you develop a regulating internal and external
environment to maximize regulation in the most
important placeyour home. Wear comfortable
clothing and shoes for a fun filled day of getting a
grip on emotional regulation from the inside out.
September 29, 2017 9:00 AM 4:00 PM
Glenn County Office of Education Conference Room, 311 South Villa Avenue Willows, CA
RSVP Required. Please contact Leslie Damschroder at 530-879-3861 for more information.
2 An Alternatives to Violence Project
An Alternatives to made possible
Violence
project, madeapossible
OCTOBER 2017
10 bFetal Alcohol Spectrum
Disorder Group (FASD) (Chico)
Tuesday, October 10, 9:30-11:30AM,
Lilliput Childrens Services, 289 Rio Lindo
Ave. Chico. Marji Thomas, MA, CCC is
facilitating this new support group, focusing
on Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder. The
FASD Support Group will provide general
information, resources, referral information
and provide a supportive circle for you and
your family. Please join us every month for
this new and informative support group.
For more information, contact Alice McKee,
MSW- 530.828.8731 AMcKee@Lilliput.org.
11 bTeen
Group (Chico)
Wednesday, October 11, 6 - 7:30PM, Lilliput
Childrens Services, 289 Rio Lindo Ave.
Chico. For adoptive teens. Please contact
Elisa Chavez at at 530-896-1920 or email if
you have any questions.
18 bTogether on Purpose
Adoptive Parents Group
TENTATIVE DATE! October 18, 2017,
6-7PM. We're working hard to make sure
that this group is scheduled conveniently
for Tehama County adoptive families. WE
FRE
TRA
ININ
E Family Support Group ... For info, call Miko:
G!
The Presenter: Ce Eshelman, LMFT is a
champion of adoptive parents, the founder
of The Attach Place Center for Strengthening
Relationships in Sacramento and author
of a support book for adoptive parents-
Drowning with My Hair on Fire: Insanity Relief
for Adoptive Parents. She is an attachment
therapist specializing in treating families with
children diagnosed with Reactive Attachment
Disorder, Complex Developmental Trauma,
and attachment/abuse recovery challenges.
through
collaboration with
through the Tehama
partnership County
with
the Tehama CountyofPermanency
Coming
Events &
Activities
NEED YOUR INPUT! Call us at 530-528-
0300 or email npeterson@atvrb.org to
tell us what you think. Final date will be
announced in October's newsletter and
through the email list. As always, free
childcare will be provided on-site. All
adoptive families welcome. We look
forward to seeing you there!
26
bKinship
Support Group (Chico)
Thursday, October 26, 11:30AM - 1PM,
Lilliput Childrens Services, 289 Rio Lindo
Ave. Chico. Come share with other families
in the KSSP group. Lunch will be provided!
Please contact Lilliput at 530-896-1920 or
email chico.office@lilliput.org if you have
any questions.
More Resources
for Adoptive
Families:
Support Groups:
Yuba, Sutter, Colusa, Glenn Counties
For Support Groups held in Yreka,
Mt. Shasta, Orland or Sacramento contact
Leslie Damschoder at 530.879.3861
Butte County Post Adoptive Services
Support Group, Drop in Assistance, WRAP
530-209-0817, Heather: 916-475-7198 or
Deborah: 530-896-1920
Education:
Sierra Forever Families
Seminars on topics like Attachment,
Understanding Poverty, Understanding
Trauma, and more. Leslie Damschoder
530.879.3861
The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships
3406 American River Drive, Suite D
Sacramento, CA 95864
ce@attachplace.com (916) 403-0588
Department
Social Services
Team.

People usually consider walking on water
People usually consider walking on water
or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real
miracle is.to walk on earth. Every day we
are engaged in a miracle which we dont even
recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green
leaves, and the curious eyes of a child-own
own two eyes. All is a miracle.
- Thich Nhat Hanh
A day in the life:
5:00pm.Parents just getting off
work, kids needing to be to soccer
practice and dance rehearsal, one
cant find a sock, the other a shoe,
everyone is tired and hungry and
over stimulated, the baby has a dirty
diaper and is teething, and there is
still common core math homework
to be done (insert eye roll here), no
one has clean clothes for tomorrow,
you have no idea what you will do for
dinner, and at this point you will settle
for the gold fish on the floor of the van,
and to top it off you and your spouse
cant seem to agree on anything.
Sound familiar?
Parenting can be one of the
most exhausting, frustrating, and
overwhelming jobs in the world.
However, it is also the most important
Together on Purpose September 2017
by Natalie Peterson
and fulfilling role we will ever play. you ground and center yourself, gain
How we choose to manage our stress perspective, and see the world more
in these moments of chaos is vital to clearly.
our personal and family success and
What can you tell me about the
wellbeing. Now dont stop reading
specific moments of your day?
because you think this is going to
be another task to add to your never The sights, sounds, smells, the how,
ending list. what, when, and whys? Did you
What does the word
look deeply into your childrens (or
your spouses for that matter) eyes,
mindfulness mean to you?
or actively listen to their stories,
By definition mindfulness is the smell their sweaty small body? Our
quality or state of being conscious or mindfulness might be the single
aware of something; a mental state greatest gift we can give to our
achieved by focusing ones awareness children, and ourselves. It allows
on the present moment, while calmly them to feel heard, seen, valued,
acknowledging and
accepting ones feelings,
thoughts, and bodily
sensations, used as a We should all be embracing
therapeutic technique. being the good enough parent
Prevention Magazines that showed up every day with
special publication The
Mindfulness Manual the best of intentions.
says Youve heard a lot
about it, but what exactly
is it? Its a mental state in which you understood and it builds their sense
focus on awareness and the present of self. It is worth more than anything
moment. Mindfulness is simple, but that can be purchased, enrolled in,
it takes a lot of practice. And when or scheduled. It doesnt require any
you do everything more mindfully,
3 possible
An Alternatives to Violence Project made
fancy equipment or skills. It is just
you and the nuggets, tid-bits, and
nooks and crannies of your day.
It takes just a moment to
breathe, be still, and reconnect to
your heart.
The benefits of mindfulness are far
reaching. It can help to increase
overall focus and attention, rewire
our brain in a new habit pattern, build
our resilience in the face of stress,
and boost our overall wellbeing. Your
children wont remember or care
that all the dishes were done, floors
mopped, or their socks matched.
They do remember if they felt valued,
listened to, and if their parents really
paid attention. Its the small moments
that matter most. Remember that we
are modeling how to be in our world
as a person, a spouse, and a parent.
It is time to move out of our habit of
being on automatic pilot as a parent
and remind ourselves that perfection
is a fallacy.
A mindfulness practice is more about
being rather than doing. It is as easy
as implementing a few key family
habits that dont take a lot of time,
money, or skill. It is taking time for
what matters.
Here is a list to get you started:
Have a daily routine so that
everyone knows what is expected.
Have a whole family digital detox
once a week.
Yes everyoneno social media, I Pad
check outs, TV, video games etc.
This is a cultural addiction that has
triggered a dopamine addiction in all
of our brains. More on this subject to
come!
Have one hour a day of undivided
attention with your family.
This is a great weekend plan.
Learn to take a break when
needed.
Spend quiet time at the end of the
day to decompress and set the
stage for a stress free bedtime.
Create a family gratitude practice.
Eat dinner at the table as a family
with no outside distractions.
Have family story time.
Spend time in nature.
Create a habit of bullet journaling
your feeling each day.
Simple, to the point, one word.
Begin a meditation practice.
I've included a simple one-minute
mediation below.
We should all be embracing being the
good enough parent that showed up
every day with the best of intentions.
Life is simply a collection of moments.
Remember to go easy on yourself, we
are retraining our patterns.

One-Minute Meditation
Sit erect in a straight backed chair or on the floor on of realizing that your mind has wandered and bringing
a cushion. Allow your spine to be self- supporting. your attention back without criticizing yourself is central
If seated, place your feet flat on the floor. Close your to the practice of mindfulness meditation.
eyes.
Your mind may eventually become calm like a still
Focus your attention on your breath as it flows in pond-or it may not. Even if you get a sense of absolute
and out of your body. Stay in touch stillness, it may only be fleeting. If you
with the different sensations of feel angry or exasperated, notice that
each inhale and exhale. Observe It takes just a moment to this may be fleeting as well. Whatever
the breath without looking for breathe, be still, and happens, just allow it to be as it is.
anything special to happen. There reconnect to your heart.
After a minute, let your eyes gently
is no need to alter your breathing in
open and take in the room around
any way.
you. Take in three deep breaths through your nose and
After a while your mind may wander. When you out your mouth.
notice this, gently bring your attention back to your
breath without giving yourself a hard time-the act Congratulations.
You made it through your first meditation!

4 An Alternatives to Violence Project

An Alternatives to made possible
Violence through
project, madeapossible
collaboration with
through the Tehama
partnership County
with Department
the Tehama CountyofPermanency
Social Services
Team.
Back-to-School Word Search
P S N N F M J O C P F Z T D J G U Y P C

D O W Y U F M N A A Z B P S K R K O I O
X V C R S G Q S L E W U B G D W M J A U

I P N E W B P Z C M C A K F X S C G Y S

I D Q K L E S N U K C A P K C A B N D D

M F J B L T E J L H I S T O R Y V G V N

F T G L T I Z W A R L L J A D H F M E E

E R I Z C E Z H T G P U I X P J X P P I

K N E S Y B M F O M A E K L H L S W S R

G Z V H R H S U R O Q A N S I A Y Y X F

Q K X F C L D U Q D L W M C M Q T Z X E

D C Z R P A E U R U F W W W I Y Z S B U

U V N D T E A C H E R G Y R U L K X W L

How many of these back-to-school words can you find hidden above?

BACKPACK HISTORY PENCIL CALCULATOR

SPELLING TEACHER FRIENDS SCIENCE TIC-TAC-TOE

BOREDOM BUSTERS
Dots-n-Boxes
Instructions: Each player takes it in turns to draw a line that joins two dots, either horizontally
or vertically. The dots must be adjacent (no skipping over any dots!). When a player completes
a whole box, he or she gets to put his or her inital or mark in the box. When the whole grid is
filled with boxes, the person who has made the most boxes wins!

Together on Purpose September 2017 5 possible

An Alternatives to Violence Project made
Alternatives to Violence
1805 Walnut Street Red Bluff, California 96080
R E S O U R C E S , N E W S & I N F O R M AT I O N F O R A D O P T I V E FA M I L I E S I N T E H A M A C O U N T Y
2017
SEPT
An Alternatives to Violence Project made possible through a collaboration with the Tehama County Department of Social Services