Gabriela Pacheco

Professor Karen

Psychology 1100

Dec 8th, 2017

Love and Close Relationships

Some people leave a marriage literally, by divorcing. Others do so by leading parallel

lives together.(John Gottman). John M. Gottman a professor of psychology, known for his work

on marital stability and relationship analysis was the inspiration for my signature assignment. I

wanted to represent his several principles for making marriage work through a collage of pictures

that correspond with each one of his concepts. The first concept is making love maps; a love map

is having relevant information about ones spouse such as their worries and goals in life. These

love maps are not set in stone and can change. To represent this in my collage I got different

colored maps and wrote things one would know about their partner as street names.

The second principle is nurturing admiration and respect. This involves thinking of the

reasons you cherish your partner and letting them know. To represent this I included personal

reasons as to why I admire my partner in the map as well. The Third concept is turning towards

each other. This means connecting with ones spouse. Making sure to be there for the things that

are important to them. I represented this with a picture of a man and woman hugging. The fourth

is accepting influence, which means being able to take their opinion and feelings into account. I

corresponded this with a picture of two heads with a main focus on the brain. The fifth principle

is solving solvable problems this involves being able to result problems face to face without

necessarily arguing. I represented this with two figures sting at a table talking. The Sixth is

overcoming gridlock, in this principle the couple must be able to willingly explore the hidden
issues that are really causing the problem. I expressed this with an image of a couple crossed

arms facing each other with a red line in between.

Finally, his last concept is creating shared meaning. To show this in my collage I have a

couple holding hands in the shape of a heart. I chose this particular subject because it really

captured my attention in class. In fact, my parents recently divorced this year so perhaps that is

why this topic stood out a little more for me. I intend to use these principles in my current

relationship and hope to see good results. Overall, I found this topic to be very insightful and

intriguing.

Work cited

Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (1999). The seven principles for making marriage work. New York:

Three Rivers Press.