Beruflich Dokumente
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The sound of his car swerving into the driveway and the flash of the headlights through my
pale pink curtains and into my eyes made me shiver. Jumping into bed, I engulf myself under my
covers and shut my eyes tight, wishing I could just become invisible. The creak of the front door
and the smashing of the beer bottle rang in my ears, and he stumbled to my door, already half
ripped off the hinges. A knock on the door does not exist anymore in this home, he barges in,
turning the key in the lock and slurs his words, asking me if I did all my chores. I shove my
phone between the pillows and tell him that I have. This was an everyday occurrence, and
everyday occurrence of reliving this nightmare, the fever I can not sweat out. My dad creeps
over, with the smell of alcohol fresh on his breath and sweating through his pores from the
previous night, and just stares, and I know he is about to burst. Me, a girl on her thirteenth
birthday, forced to sit and clean like a slave with no recognition that I am human, a daughter. His
hand slaps me across the face, and I know I am in for another beating, for what? I wish I knew, I
wish someone would save me from this ongoing cycle, I wish mama had never left. Child abuse,
harm in which seemingly never gets called upon. Children commonly seem to be laughing and
smiling, however behind closed doors, that simply in cases proves false. Child abuse exists in
multiple forms, each shakes a child to the core for their whole lives those chills will never
vanish. The studies and statistics for caretakers who physically, emotionally, sexually abused,
neglected, or abandon a child deem truly absurd. The effects are something one must dig deep to
understand the pain and battle scars of the victims. Abuse as a child provides victims with long-
term effects, physically, mentally, and emotionally, altering them for life.
The infamous court case of Lyle and Erik Menendez murdering their parents was strictly an
act out of fear for their lives, from their dark past enduring childhood mental, physical, and
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sexual abuse. In 1989, two brothers by the name of Lyle and Erik Menendez fatally shot and
killed their parents, Jose and Mary “Kitty” Menendez. Fifteen bullets, fifteen gun wounds, two
brothers, two guns, and two lives that can never be replaced. Within those statements, people
never seem to mention the years of Lyle and Erik’s lives they were tormented. Throughout the
course of the trial, the boys obtained two separate lawyers, who pleaded a lighter sentence under
California law than the death penalty. They pleaded that Lyle and Erik’s actions were the result
of years of sexual and mental abuse by their parents. With such an immense amount of money
and power under the Menendez family’s belt, if the sons reached out for help, their voices would
have been muffled. Due to the possible disbelief, serious measures had to be carried through. The
conditions behind closed doors the brothers had to live behind were not as ideal as everyone
thought, "They say that Jose Menendez sexually molested his older son from the ages 6 to 8 and
his younger son from the ages 6 to 18" (Corry). Child abuse is real; this case is raw. Molestation
is embarrassing and cold, falling into the categories of physical and mental abuse. For anyone,
this pain is unbearable and can lead to a simple snap, in this case, the murder. The Menendez
brothers shocked the nation with their case of "cold-blooded" murder to their parents, but with
their mental and physical health distorted, there is no surprise they needed an escape from
reality.
The Menendez brothers truly believed they were in danger through their parent’s actions,
their psychological state during this time is what drove them to the breaking point. The murder
of Jose and Kitty Menendez acted as a cry for help, they marked the extreme limit of familial
tensions and breakdowns. Nightmares became a reality as they began to believe their parents
were plotting to murder them simply for their knowledge and intelligence on their own child
abuse. As for the older son, and brother, Lyle, “As a child, he said, he began imitating his
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father’s sexual violence by abusing his younger brother. When he discovered a few years later
that his father had begun molesting his brother, he testified, he confronted him. He said his father
threatened to kill him if he told anyone about it” (Corry). The boys added that they felt they had
no choice, that Jose would kill them, get rid of them both. They wished to ruin their father and
diminish the feelings of shame and embarrassment. Lyle and Erik were in tears through their
testimonies, the pain showed sharp-edged in their eyes, traumatized by the events that took place
in their own home. The brothers were drained, however in physical and mental pain no longer,
the years of abuse endurance put a strain on their brain and state of mind. Prior to the murders,
Erik had attended therapy, the abuse only added an immense amount of stress. When their
parents had perished, so did the brother's sorrow. The Menendez brothers were treated far too
As demonstrated in the case of the Menendez brothers, Kitty Menendez was similarly
abused moving on to prey on her children in a cruel cycle. The cycle of abuse is one of the major
causes of defects of reality, for its undertakers right from wrong is skewed and the victims
continue on into an unhealthy state of mind moving on to abuse. This unstoppable sequence
occurs when an abused child moves into their adult lifestyle knowing nothing other than what
their parents had told them, going on to abuse their own children. There are four components in
the cycle, the first being the original setup, the origin being through the perpetrators. Then along
comes the emotional blackmail, learned helplessness, and the stress-response cycle. Violence
passed down from one generation to the next, spawns a greater amount of violence. Similar to
any other cycle, unless a concept is altered such as getting therapy or other methods of
supportive measures, it will continue relentlessly. In statistics listed by the American SPCC,
more than ninety percent of victims know their perpetrator, family members being the most
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frequent recorded cases (American SPCC). A similar institute also reported that roughly thirty
percent of neglected and abused children will continue the horrible cycle of abuse, this number is
alarmingly high, it has spiraled out of control (EDC Institute). The most crucial part of this cycle
is the emotional blackmail, and how the prey deal with it, “When a child gets older, the child
feels worthless, and is filled with enormous shame and self-hate. But what they don’t realize is
that they have been blackmailed by their abusers that somehow by responding to innocent needs
for affection, they were the cause of their own abuse” (EDC Institute). Mental and physical
abuse go hand in hand, and when both remain constant the victim feels as if the comments made
prevail true, and their injuries deserved. At this point, they are emotionally unstable and the
response is to act out on others how they are treated; These children seem to be taught in a
corrupt manner. The cycle of abuse also exists in relationships, however, the terms of child abuse
are nearly labeled unstoppable, for the victims do not know any better. The sufferers exist
Solely abuse is the origin of the cycle, but why do parents tend to abuse their children? Part
of the human race are taught that “tough love” is the only real type of love; parents are taught to
love their children. Tough love is an oxymoron, in which constraints are enforced and
responsibility for all is taken by the victim, in an act of affection with negative consequences.
Children are dependent on their parent, and follow in their footsteps, even if they detect
something wrong, they are fragile and vulnerable. A child’s voice can not be heard loud and
clear, they are incapable of speaking out and standing up for themselves. Alongside abusive
parents, there would conceive severe punishments for their actions, as abusers often threaten
their children. Coping methods of abuse for victims are abided by the parents. Guardians could
not send them out into the world with their battle scars of being neglected, and the guardians
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themselves would refuse therapy. In addition, environmental change such as moving house to
house, or city to city, can cause immense amounts of stress that could rupture at any moment,
and their innocent children are in the line of fire. Even built up anger can be the beginning of
tremendous episodes of abuse. Children’s eyes are not shielded to this behavior, the poor actions
are all they know; abuse is all they know, in which ties back to how they learn from their
parental guidance. However, the abusers sometimes may simply be following the cycle, their
emotions are at an all-time high, snapping on the drop of a dime. In a study from Psychology
Today, the author states, “They lash out, not for the sake of providing their children with a bright
future or teaching them to be good. They are reacting out of an emotional storm within them,
often triggered by an implicit memory of their own unresolved traumas from childhood”
(Firestone). With the issue of unstable guardians it is visible the cycle of abuse is not just a name
or excuse, it is a real issue which needs to be cracked with true psychological help. The predators
teach their children it is acceptable to lash out when emotions are running wild, this is never the
case. They believe their parents, trapped in the ongoing cycle of abuse. The repetition is hard to
break through, it is similar to a stone wall where you can not see the other side.
Through the cycle of abuse, victimization of child abuse lights the way for self-degrading
victims may feel they have nowhere sufficient to turn to with their grief and shame. Numbing the
pain for only a temporary amount of time, prostitution could be the path to take if events
correlated in the past. Most commonly, sexual abuse creates tension in relationships later on in
life, emotionally and physically, and acts like a wall similar to the cycle. However, even lack of
sexual activity in their abusive past, whether it has been their harming partner or guardian, could
drive them to the brink. In the industry, some feel safe, they do not have to take their sorrows and
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anger out on loved ones, but total strangers as an alternative. For once, the prior victims have a
prominent voice. Countless cases of unknown names are brought up for prostitution, countless
child abuse victims have been growing up as prostitutes. There are sexual assault and abuse cases
embedded in the prostitution industry. Through statistics, there lies raw evidence that prostitution
is a self-degrading pattern one wishes not to follow. Opposing Views in Context by GaleGroup
includes, “The Illinois Coalition Against Sexual Assault (ICASA) conducted a study in which 57
percent of women working as prostitutes in the state reported they were sexually abused as
children. The study also found that more than 90 percent lost their virginity through assault, and
70 percent believed being sexually abused as children influenced their decision to become
prostitutes.” (Lydersen). Their pitiful past leads to their equally as pitiful future as a prostitute.
Prior trauma, physically, emotionally, and mentally, influences their decision to attempt and feel
secure again and not vulnerable, and to be in control. Prostitution is an unhealthy security
blanket, that must be thrown away with the past life of victims from child abuse.
numb the pain and shame, which is what drugs and alcohol can provide. Choices to let their past
overtake their future is simply overpowering. Therapy is refused, they feel as if they have their
life under control when in reality they are throwing their lives away in the hands of a package
store or a drug dealer. Undoubtedly, one-time using drugs or alcohol as a stressed victim can
easily slip into a gateway to alcoholism and severe drug addiction. Drug use and alcohol drinking
can extend the cycle of abuse for their children. Alcohol and drugs are brain and life-damaging,
"Children who have experienced abuse and maltreatment show changes in important parts of
their brains. These changes are linked to depression, drug addiction, schizophrenia and other
mental health problems, according to a new study from Harvard University." (Elements
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Behavioral Health). Health issues arrive, then come with mental health deficiencies that can be
passed down through generations genetically. Child abuse leads to more than psychological,
physical, and mental effects, but also unhealthy habits that commonly damage life expectancy.
Although child abuse pertains a bad reputation, in specific cases it is believed that child
and physical altercations. Children have minds of their own, and tend to run about and complete
the tasks they want when they want; Children are simply hard to tame. Discipline is needed in
order for an efficient lifestyle, to know rights and wrongs. However, in circumstances, methods
of discipline are often falsely labeled as child abuse. Child abuse is commonly thought out,
scolded once in a while is not likely to alter a “victim’s” state of mind. A single hit to get a point
across will not leave scars that last forever. If a child fails to meet correct, moral, expectations,
they will be corrected, and that is not abuse, that is being a righteous parent or guardian. As
stated in an article by Livestrong, “Positive discipline helps children to learn and change their
behavior. Child abuse can result when discipline or attempts to control a child becomes
excessive and injures the child.” (Smenyak). Negativity does not swarm around correction in
your child’s actions, it can be brought upon in a positive manner without degrading lifelong
effects.
Child abuse causes extreme trauma for its victims, the lifelong negative effects are not
worth using forceful actions to get children to behave ideally. The abuse of a child is never
acceptable in any case or circumstance, and the risk of continuing the cycle of abuse seems
never-ending, until parents truly begin to understand the toll on the children. Perpetrators are ill,
whether they come to their senses or not, their mental state is skewed as this is passed down to
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the innocent victim. Abuse as a child is something one can never seem to shake, the vivid
pictures of their abuse and the look of anger in their parent's eyes is something snapshotted in
their minds forever, the effects stay with one for a lifetime. A child should have a fresh and open
mind, and not one full of fear and disorder. Abuse manipulates and twists a child's natural sense
of trust and love, the innocent feelings are mocked as they learn to become numb to the pain,
they want to grow up. Children are emotionally, mentally, and physically beaten daily. The
permanent scars and bruises are not only seen on the skin but remain on their hearts and cut deep
in their minds. Subsequently, children are capable of breaking through the repetitious cycle and
the malicious actions placed upon them. Through awareness, education, and therapy, it is
possible the physical, mental, and emotional tragedies brought onto the youth through child
Works Cited
www.elementsbehavioralhealth.com/addiction/child-abuse-alcoholism-drug-addiction/.
Lydersen, Kari. “Childhood Sexual Abuse Often Leads to Prostitution.” In These Times,
link.galegroup.com/apps/doc/EJ3010461207/OVIC?u=tecu26050&xid=96e5e99f.
Accessed 2017.
The New York Times, The New York Times, 31 Mar. 1986,
www.nytimes.com/1986/04/01/movies/generations-of-violence-the-cycle-of-child-
abuse.html.
effects-and-impact/153-cycle-of-child-abuse-trauma.html.
Firestone, Lisa. “Here's How to Break the Cycle of Child Abuse.” Psychology Today,
matters/201409/here-s-how-break-the-cycle-child-abuse.
difference-between-discipline-child/.
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