Unit 1 Evaluation of Performance

Name: Rai Hussein Al Zarif El Bobo

At the start of the unit, my chosen stimulus was ‘Who am I?’ it is a stimulus that has
many underlying meanings and can therefore be a challenge to effectively present.
However, the fact that there were many initial ideas that were so easily presentable made
the stimuli more interesting than others. The main notion of rape, not wanting a child,
abortion and the possibility of that not working, were very important in our motivation to
choose this stimulus. It justified why this choice was perhaps more suitable than others
because it showed me, and the group in general, that we could find different ideas to
elaborate and develop the storyline. All along, we wanted to attempt a different theatrical
style and the idea of rape seemed to fit the overall connotation of cruelty and
gruesomeness. It was clear that we were motivated to challenge ourselves and improve our
dramatic and directorial contributions to the performance; as a result, we decided that
using ‘Theatre of Cruelty’ was a perfect way to extend ourselves and help us provide a
relevant interpretation of how bad and to what extent questioning one’s identity can be
damaging. To efficiently portray this, I wanted to take an active role therefore I have chosen
acting as my skill and I decided to play the character of Harry - a victim of abuse and rape, as
well as someone who has a loss of a coherent identity.
Our initial aims and objectives for our performance were to raise awareness about
domestic abuse, sexual exploitation and the loss of identity. It was our aim to use cruelty
and violence to create an emphasis on the largely detrimental impact that domestic abuse
and sexual exploitation can have on a person, nevertheless a child. Additionally, we wanted
the audience to understand that actions always prevail over thoughts and ideas. In a sense,
we wanted to prompt a ‘call-for-action’ urging our audience to start talking about domestic
abuse, and taking the simplest of actions such as speaking up when needed to.
I wanted to play Harry for many reasons. First, I wanted to have an effective impact
on the audience as his character is both sympathetic and complex. He is sympathetic
because he passes through difficult experiences in his childhood which deprived him of his
innocence. He is complex since his character kept changing and developed through different
psychological stages. Another reason which motivated me to play Harry is my belief that
playing an emotional and dramatic would be challenging, because as he passes through
different problems, many conflicts and passions arise which would be important to portray
in the stage. Moreover, presenting Harry’s naivety simultaneously would be a further test
which I would need to overcome. In addition, the mix of identity and personality would
contrast to create a sympathetic audience and I wanted to use this to emphasise that action
always prevails over thoughts and feelings. Therefore, playing such a part would be difficult
and had to be balanced carefully during the performance. Actually, I found the character
quite challenging to play since I had to be wary of how it impacted the perceptions of the
audience but this added to the excitement of playing such an important role in shaping or
changing the perspectives and opinions of the audience.
In order to develop my character, I did some research and came across several
stories about young people who had been abused and raped by their parents at a young
age. In addition, I took it upon myself to meet some victims of child and sexual abuse: in one
instance, I met someone who proclaimed that they ‘were very lucky to be alive’; their
experience had been so traumatic that they came to the brink of suicide on several
occasions. I decided that this would be a fitting end to our performance since many who
have passed through such experiences aren’t as lucky as others. More importantly, this
experience helped me understand that most victims of child abuse are exploited and as a
result, I concluded that a naive, young and innocent individual would be perfect to become
the victim of such gruesome actions; quite simply, this made me understand my chosen
character in a wider perspective so this enables me to present credibly and believably to the
audience. Furthermore, the technique of ‘hot seating’, helped me in getting to know the
small details about how victims of child abuse feel and tend to act, and helped me
understand what I needed to communicate to the audience. Such examples include his
frustrations and fragile emotional state, as well as his defeated and vulnerable approach to
life. I think I did this effectively when I said, ‘are you proud of yourself?’ in ‘Question Time’; I
thought this sent a message of loss and defeat to the audience and I believe this was an
important decision to contribute to the climax of the performance.
Individually, to prepare for my role, I spent time trying to identify which tone best
portrays my character throughout the play. Knowing that my character’s age changed
throughout the play, I worked towards contrasting my voice during my first appearance in
‘Oral Rape’ and my last in ‘Suicide’. I believe that was important to show the audience that
my character was young, to start off with, and has suffered for a long time, before coming
to the final decision of committing suicide. In addition to this, I prepared for my role by
practising the requirements for each scene. For example, in ‘Blood and Vomit’, I practised
how to vomit believably and I considered when to vomit after being hit; I wanted to see how
this can have a greater impact on the audience in terms of its gruesomeness and cruelty and
how it could be shown as the start of the end for Harry. Even with this preparation, it
would’ve been better if my movement was coordinated and planned therefore making my
struggle for breath, after having vomited, more realistic however I feel that the lack of
preparation on that part allowed me to express my loss in the moment and my discontent
from the world and my family.
Overall, I think my interpretation of my character contributed to the success of the
performance; Harry was one of the main characters in the play and had he interpreted or
communicated, the performance might have lost its key element of cruelty.
Before the final performance, and during some of our last rehearsals, I made further
notes about how my character should be communicated to the audience in terms of my
acting skills. My posture, expression, voice and body language were very important in this
respect. I realised that these were very important in dictating how powerful the final
performance was, especially considering that these elements showed how the character is
feeling and create empathy on the part of the audience so that a larger feeling of cruelty
and anger would be the outcome.
On one hand, I used movement and body language to communicate my feelings to
the audience and, sometimes, my lack of body language symbolised the reoccurrence of
specific events and the routine of Harry’s life. For example, in ‘Oral Rape’, I used body
language to communicate several ideas to the audience. Firstly, I was cross-legged to
represent Harry’s youth and innocence as well as to create an impressive contrast between
life before and after the rape and its consequences on Harry’s mind-set. I think this was
convincing in creating a juxtaposition which made the actions of Harry’s dad even more
cruel and barbaric. When Harry’s dad was touching Harry as he asked him if he wanted to
re-enact a story, I decided not to use body language, or any other acting skill, to show my
discomfort because I wanted the audience to think about my lack of reaction and consider if
this exploitation is a regular occurrence and if so, how can someone as young as Harry
cooperate with it, or, at the surface level, understand it. In my opinion, this should’ve had a
great impact on the audience and given that our performance was reliant on audience
reaction towards Harry, I thought this was effective in getting their sympathy and
contributed in making the scene even more brutal.
As for the movement on the stage, I am confident that it was used to communicate
Harry’s emotions in the scene and throughout the performance. In the ‘Hospital’ scene, the
lack of movement was symbolic for a lack of hope and future, and my hand was on my
cheek to represent Harry’s vulnerable status. Later, when I started my monologue, I had a
defeated stance and this was reflected in my slow movement across the stage. However,
the monologue was aimed at letting all my anger and sadness out hence why the movement
on stage got faster as Harry got more upset talking about his past and how that has affected
his future. I could improve by considering if it was needed to slow down the movement
towards the end of the monologue to make the transition between ‘Hospital’ and ‘Suicide’
smoother; this may have improved the effectiveness of the performance since it would’ve
been a suitable build-up as it reflected the many thoughts that slowed down Harry’s suicide.
However, I believe that this was still a vastly successful part of the play and helped the
audience realise that Harry was miserable, upset and unsettled therefore showing that
movement and body language was used effectively to show Harry’s feeling and thoughts.
My voice was very important to, firstly, show the development of my character from a
young boy to a grown teenager and, secondly, to show the change of emotion Harry
experienced throughout the performance. In ‘Oral Rape’, Harry was still a young boy and I
needed to use my voice to show this effectively. I found this challenging since I have a very
low-pitched voice and I couldn’t manipulate to match the high-pitch voice a typical kid of
Harry’s age might have therefore I decided it would be better if I spoke in a softer tone,
rather than a higher-pitched one, and spoke quietly to show Harry’s youth and innocence.
Later, in ‘Blood and Vomit’, I spoke using my normal voice when I said, ‘I just want to help
out’. The fact that I was louder than before clearly showed that Harry has matured and he’s
older than he was when he was first on-stage. In ‘Abortion’, when I made a short
appearance and was speaking over other characters, perhaps it would be better if I spoke
quieter to show Harry’s inability to stand up for himself and his beliefs. This would’ve been
effective in setting up the consistent theme of cruelty from the start of the performance.
Overall however, I think I used my voice effectively and I was able to achieve the objectives
we, as a group, set out for Harry’s voice thus contributing greatly to the quality of the final
performance. I could further improve my performance by making sure that I articulate my
speech more. By doing this, the audience would be able to understand the speech of the
performance, hence be able to understand the gravity of the situation more effectively. This
would allow us to significantly enhance the aim of the performance; to disgust the audience
in order to prompt a call to action.
Facial expressions were also key in communicating Harry’s emotions to the audience
and creating an empathy that was needed to make the performance more brutal. In ‘Oral
Rape’, for example, I used facial expressions throughout the scene to show the audience
what Harry was thinking and how he reacted to his dad’s suggestion. When Harry’s dad first
asks him if he want to re-enact a story, I manipulate my eyebrows to communicate
excitement. Later in the scene, when the story was being told, I used several expressions to
explain the storyline; I used my lips to show how Harry was sad that the snake was lonely
and when it said, ‘there he saw the big old cave’, John moved my mouth open so to express
Harry’s excitement, and his lack of understanding too, I popped out my eyes. Although I
think my use of facial expressions was consistent throughout the performance, I could
improve my performance by adding more facial expressions in ‘Blood and Vomit’. It was
such a monumental scene with a lot of action therefore perhaps I was unable to adapt to
the pace of the performance. Changing this wouldn’t have made a big difference to the
impact of the performance, but it could’ve had a long-term impact on the audience which in
turn may prompt them to make a difference or a stand against abuse.
The performance was fuelled with anger and hatred and as such I needed to
communicate Harry’s feelings about his parents, the only characters he interacts with. In
‘Oral Rape’, Harry thought his dad was loving and caring hence why I said, ‘I will never swap
you for a goldfish dad’ however this changes after ‘Oral Rape’ and ‘Blood and Vomit’. We
can clearly see the contrast when I say, ‘am I not your son?’ to show Harry’s disbelief that
his father had raped him, abused him and neglected his responsibilities for him. As for
Harry’s mum, Samantha, I generally felt that she loved and cared for Harry, however some
blame was to be put on her. In ‘Blood and Vomit’, when Harry’s dad was having a violent
argument with Harry’s mum, I showed that Harry cared for his mum by trying to protect her.
However, in ‘Question Time’, I presented Harry’s infrequent thoughts about to what extent
his mum is to blame. I did this when I said, ‘Yes mum, why did you not care?’ I believe that
had a great impact on the audience because it made them consider whether things are
actually as they seem. Harry was being abused regularly by John and the viewers have to
consider whether it’s only John’s fault. I could further improve my performance by
exaggerating the stated emotions. If I had done this, it would’ve been extremely clear to the
audience that I am feeling a certain way. For example, in ‘Blood and Vomit’, if “am I not your
son?” was exaggerated, that would’ve enabled the audience to clearly highlight the change
of emotion and character, from naivety and blind-love, in ‘Oral Rape’, to maturity and hate,
in ‘Blood and Vomit’. As well as allowing to improve my own individual performance, this
individual improvement would’ve had an impact on the overall performance in the way that
it created a contrast, it allowed the audience to identify the development of character, and
the fragile father-son relationship that would eventually lead to a complete loss of identity
and suicide.
Overall, I think my acting skills allowed me to have a dramatic impact on the power
and effectiveness of the final performance. Therefore, I think, generally speaking, my acting
skills were consistent despite there being a room for improvement.
Although the final performance depended on the contribution of the entire cast,
individual contributions made the performance stand out and sometimes added to the
element of cruelty and disgust. The group’s interpretation of child and sexual abuse was
quite effective as it was evident in the performance since the audience was completely
focussed throughout. In addition, I felt that I was really engaged in the performance; in
some instances, I really felt as if I was truly experiencing how a victim of child abuse might
feel especially in ‘Blood and Vomit’ when Harry had matured and could understand what
has been happening to him throughout his life. I believe that this engagement allowed me
to convey my character the best way I could, or understood how to, and as such would’ve
been best interpreted by the audience. My engagement allowed me to perform at a good
pace and allowed other characters to stay in character and maintain the high standard of
performance. Furthermore, I believe that the vomit, which I felt was very disgusting, added
to the overall gruesomeness of the performance - it was my idea to use rice pudding and
food colouring and had it not been this realistic, the impact on some members of the
audience may have been different. What’s more, clarity and articulation were needed in
order to efficiently educate the audience. Based on this, I made sure that I was loud
throughout the performance so that the audience will be able to hear the ongoing dialogue
or monologue on stage. Also, I made sure that I was as articulate and clear as I could. In one
instance, in ‘Suicide’, I wasn’t as clear however the accumulation of emotions would’ve
justified this error and would’ve, in fact, exposed to the audience the true emotions that I
was experiencing in that moment. This is largely significant because it showed that acting a
fragile situation as such was difficult therefore some more thoughtful audience members
would become aware of the true, harsh and violent emotions a person in real life would
feel.
On the other hand, I was aware that sometimes I tried to overshadow other key
characters, especially in ‘Abortion’. If I had tried to focus on developing my character and
the audience's’ understanding of him was more important than overshadowing other
characters. During some rehearsal sessions when we were doing scenes I wasn’t
participating in, I got a bit distracted however with time I think I was able to improve this
and I shared directorial responsibilities with all the members in the group.
Overall, I think my individual contribution helped in fulfilling the initial aims and
objectives of creating a theme of cruelty and I believe that the audience were engaged with
the performance, however given our genre, it was difficult to ensure that the audience
enjoyed the show.