Washburn 1

Ericka Washburn

Mrs. Strehle

ENG 1101-201

21 September 2017

Forever Remembered

“The death of a loved one is an amputation.” These words were spoken by a wise

man named C.S. Lewis, and never have I understood the sorrow and pain of these words

until I faced a tragedy of my own. Death is an unspoken dungeon in every man’s mind

that no one dares to enter because our eyes are terrified of what may be revealed in our

hearts and soul. Death causes us to question our purpose in this cruel world, and if life is

even worth living. But during these powerful and burdening pains, I found a hope in

Jesus that allowed for me to continue, in what seemed to be a pointless world.

My body was paralyzed with doubt when I stared blankly down the endless,

narrow prison like hall. With endless murmurs, and eyes closing in on my every move, I

forced my tears to find a hiding place. I somehow managed to take a deep breath in, and

when I took my first creeping step forward, I realized that this moment was the end of my

life. I kept my head bowed, with the rest of my sloping body, trying to prevent the world

from witnessing the aftermath of the massacre of tears, that took place the night before.

Involuntarily the terror replayed in my mind as I heard her name by the passing students.

*A slight knock had been heard as the door had crept open, “Ericka?” my dad had softly

spoken as he slowly leaned his head on the doorway.

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“Yes?” I had responded rudely after my eyes had finally drifted to sleep, after a long,

stressful day of school.

“Do you know a girl by the name Alexandra Fowler?” He ruminatively asked.

I had noticed there was concern in his voice, and before I had known- *

“Riiinnnnggg!”

My head jolted up to brash bell, realizing that I was sitting at my desk with no

recollection of how or when I had arrived. I frantically searched for a familiar face, but

everyone surrounding me were just blank figures of lifelessness. A gloomy aura hoovered

over every corner of the room, and my eyes betrayed me as a flood of uncontrollable

tears cascaded down my façade that caused me to bolt out of the collapsing classroom.

There was no going back, I needed to get out before people saw me at this vulnerable

state. I was the girl who kept my head high through the darkest valleys, a helping hand

for those with the deepest needs so that I could be the encouragement to others, but today,

I was the one in desperate need of saving. This school, this classroom, this hall...

*“She was in a terrible accident and-”

“That's Allie! You know, Allie Bohannon, her last name was changed, and that's why the

article reads 'Fowler.' Her and I hung out all the time,” nothing made sense, I had needed

answers, but I had no clue of the questions to ask.

“Honey,” my mom had spoken as she inched up the stairs “that is Ericka's friend, the

sweet girl that used to go to Awana's with her.”

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“I had no idea,” my dad had ashamedly admitted, “with her formal name being printed,

the connection wasn't made in my mind.”

“What's going on? I just saw her this morning in the hallway outside my first period

class. She's okay, isn't she?” I desperately search my dad's eyes for answers, but the

remorse on his face was clear on what he was about to say, confirming my biggest fear.

“You have to understand, I had no idea; your mom and I would've approached you with

the situation differently, but,” with a slight pause in his voice, “Allie was in a vital

accident,” pause. “Ericka, she passed away; they pronounced her unresponsive at the

scene.” *

I felt a warm presence when my hands were peeled away from my burning eyes,

and in perfect timing, Brooklyn, who was a teammate of mine on many soccer teams

growing up, embraced my crumbling body. Holding my trembling hand, Brooklyn guided

me down the treacherous hallway, around several corners, to the auditorium for a senior

class meeting. On the way, no words were spoken since nothing needed to be expressed

because we knew no combinations of words would change the present. We wondered into

the uncharted territory, as foreigners clueless of what might occur next in this auditorium.

When Brooklyn found a pair of open seats, we took the weight off of our feet and

shoulders, as the mourning principle, Mr. Luebbe, attempted to speak clearly. Blocked by

the sound of my beating heart, I relentlessly searcher for her, for Allie. On the left my

eyes scanned each face, error, and on the right side I scanned for the familiar expression,

error. Wiping my eyes and nose with countless tissues occupied my attention from Mr.

Luebbe until I realized how everyone had taken each other’s hands. We had all decided to
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become unified in this unspeakable devastation; this was the moment in history where the

Class of 2017 shared a long-lasting bond. A true bond tied by one common thread, Allie.

On that day, a door was opened to many pastors, counselors, and teachers to

provide a listening ear and an aiding hand to any student needing guidance. I was just one

heart out of the entire community who was impacted by Allie’s life. That specific day, on

October 3, 2016, I realized how quickly life could just end, with no warnings, clues, or

hints. To this day, I carry my life differently. Allie’s life and death set a fire in my soul

that I pray will never cease. A passion for those yearning to find true meaning in their

life, and not be frightened by the great unknown, called death. The truth is simple to

share; we all have broken a holy, perfect law, the Ten Commandments, which was created

by a perfect, holy judge, God. Due to this reality in our hearts and conscience that we

have broken this law, death becomes unspoken. This is due to the fact that if we face this

truth then we are guilty and deserve Hell instead of Heaven, so we aimlessly continue to

live in these earthly pleasures. Thankfully, we can come as we are and find a place of

salvation in Jesus. He is the only man in history to never lie, steal, lust, idolize, or commit

any other sin. Since Jesus is righteous, and God has a tremendous love for us, He took all

our sin, and died on a brutal cross for you and me. Jesus actually paid the price, which

looms over each of our lives, by spending three days in our punishment, and conquering

death on the third day by rising himself back to life. But, God gave us a choice: to accept

this gift of love by praying to Him, confessing and realizing our true state of

wretchedness and need for Him, or deny Jesus, and face the truths of our actions at any

moment. My decision to share this truth, is not easy, in reality, the conflict I have faced

has been brutal, but the way that I was, and still am, able to survive through the pains of
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Allie’s death is simply because of Jesus. He has placed value on my life, and has taught

me that living a life for Him, is the only life worth living even when tragedy takes course.

October 3, 2016 has set the course of the life I live today since I want Allie to be forever

remembered in my life. As someone once said, “It’s hard to forget someone who gave

you so much to remember.”