Conversation Starters

27 Proven Word-For-Word Conversation Starters

You Can Use To Meet Women In Any Situation

1. Situation: Bar/Club; direct approach

YOU: I know this may sound a bit random, but I think you’re absolutely stunning and I
had to come over and say hi. My name is Alex (hold out hand), what’s yours?

*Suggested ways to continue the conversation

YOU: Are you having a good night? What do you have going for you apart from your
looks?
YOU: I’m curious about you, what’s your story?

2. Situation: Bar/Club; indirect approach with banter

YOU: You guys look interesting, I had to come and say hi, how’s your night?
YOU: I noticed you checked me out when you walked in – don’t deny it! I’m not just a
piece of meat, you know, don’t stare too much, you might fall in love with me!
*Come across as jokingly so she gets it; make sure you smile!

3. Situation: Bar/Club; indirect approach

YOU: Can I get a quick female opinion on something? I can’t stay long because my
friends are over there, but do drunk “I love you’s” count?
HER: Why?
YOU: The reason I’m asking is because my buddy John was texting this girl last night
and he wants to take it back this morning. Is that possible?
HER: Yes/no/whatever
YOU: Well, in my opinion, you can’t play with feelings, etc.
*Allows you to convey some solid values to her

4. Situation: Bar/Club; approach for beginners

YOU: What time does this place close?

HER: Midnight, 3am, I don’t know.
*Gives you the opportunity to read their mood
YOU: Follow with another conversation starter if they seem friendly, like “Oh, I thought it
was open all night. You guys are definitely partying all night, right?”

5. Situation: Bar/Club; indirect approach

YOU: Walk by then turn back to ask “Hey, do you guys think David Bowie is attractive?”
HER: Yes/no/whatever
YOU: The reason I’m asking is because I went to visit my little cousin, she’s 8, and she
was putting a poster on her wall of David Bowie. So I ask her why she was doing that,
and she said ‘because he’s hot.’ I’m thinking I have a problem with that because he’s
old enough to be her grandfather! Do you think she’s just going through a phase, or
should I be really worried?
*Allow the girls to respond and then make fun of their answers.

6. Situation: Shopping mall/ on the street

YOU: Hey, I’m shopping for some cologne – can you tell me which you think is better?
*You spray a different one on each arm earlier.
HER: This one/that one
YOU: Wow, thanks, you saved me a ton of money! I wish you would have picked the
cheaper one, but okay!
*Can vary this starter by saying you’re shopping for your sister, etc.

7. Situation: On the street

YOU: Hey, sorry, but do you happen to know where ___ costume shop is?
*She will think for a moment because it’s a strange question
HER: Yes/no
YOU: Oh, okay, the reason I’m asking is because I have a costume party, and I’m
thinking about going as the Pope/something else funny.

8. Situation: On the street; approach for beginners

YOU: Excuse me, can I ask you a quick question? Do you know how to get to the
<insert big landmark that’s well known. Coffee shop, train station, etc>
HER: Yes <gives you directions>
YOU: Wow, do you know what’s really nuts? I’ve lived here for like 3 years but I’m just
really bad with directions.
HER: Me too
YOU: Well, you seem pretty good – you can definitely be my tour guide
HER: Laughs
YOU: Where are you off to now?

9. Situation: Bookstore; girl reading some sort of self help book

or something scientific

YOU: Hey, I’ve read that book, it’s really great and has a surprise ending!
HER: <Looks at book cover and laughs> Really?
YOU: Yea, they find the killer and everyone lives happily ever after.
HER: <Laughs>
YOU: Actually, seriously, I have a cocktail party tonight and I don’t know what kind of
cocktails girls like so I’m looking for a bartending book. What’s your favorite cocktail?
*This is funny because no one dies in the book.
10. Situation: Bookstore; girl is reading something

YOU: <Pick up Dating for Dummies and hold it up so she can see the cover>;
Excuse me, do you come here often?
HER: Laughs
YOU: Are you from Tennessee because you’re the only ten I see!
HER: Laughing

11. Situation: In line in a shop

YOU: Can I ask you what you’re ordering? I have no idea what to get here…
HER: Oh, I’m ordering ___
YOU: Look at her weird and say: Oh my god, if only my mom knew I was talking to a girl
who eats ___! My mom warned me about girls like you!
*Say it with a big smile!

12. Situation: In line in a coffee shop; she has a lot of orders

YOU: My god you’re thirsty; someone should be at caffeine anonymous!

13. Situation: Tourists when you hear an accent

YOU: Oh, hey, where are you from?

HER: <says any country>
YOU: That’s cool – where have you been/are you going/are you staying, etc.
*Tourist usually love meeting local people.

14. Situation: Coffee shop; indirect; girl(s) sitting by themselves

YOU: Hey ladies, can I get a quick female opinion?

HER: I’m waiting for a friend
YOU: It might as well be me; no worries, I’ve got to leave in a minute. But seriously,
would you date a guy who still sleeps with a childhood memory, like a teddy bear or
something?
HER: I don’t know/yes/laughs
YOU: The reason I’m asking is because I read an article today that said …

15. Situation: Café/Coffee shop; direct approach

YOU: Listen, I just ordered my coffee and I know this doesn’t happen often, but you’re
just absolutely stunning and I just had to say hi!
16. Situation: Café/Coffee shop; girls working behind counter

HER: Good morning, what can I get you?

YOU: Good evening
HER: It’s morning, isn’t it?
YOU: Not where I’m from!
HER: Where are you from? Etc.
*You can joke about being from somewhere strange or exotic. The idea is
to break her out of her “routine job” and get her laughing and talking.

YOU: So, how much are you making today?

HER: Oh, not much.
YOU: Oh, I assumed you were getting 50% of everything you sold?
HER: No, I wish!
YOU: Oh, I thought you were rich! I only date rich girls who can fly me
around the world. Oh, well <sigh>.
HER: Laughing

17. Situation: Video store; chick flick section

YOU: Hey, I’m thinking about getting Sleepless in Seattle, do you think it’s actually
possible to meet someone on the internet?
HER: Yes/No
YOU: Oh, man, you’re the kind of girl my mom was talking about – serial internet daters!

18. Situation: Video store; pick up 2 movies most people have seen
(ex. Sleepless in Seattle & Texas Chainsaw Massacre)

YOU: Hey, can I ask you a quick question – I’ve been trying to get a movie for my little
brother! Which one do you recommend?
HER: Haha
*You are being funny by asking her to help you choose an inappropriate movie for a kid.

19. Situation: Traveling on public transport

YOU: Hi, how are you?

HER: Fine, thanks, and you?
YOU: I know you’re not supposed to talk to other people on the bus/train/etc., but my
stop isn’t in another 20 minutes and I’m bored. How’s your day? What did you do, etc.?

20. Situation: Public transport while you’re waiting

YOU: Do you know if bus ___ is coming here?

HER: Yes/no
YOU: The transport is really bad here; once I waited for 3 months for my bus!
HER: Laugh, yeah!
YOU: Do you live nearby?
HER: Yea, on ___whatever street.
YOU: OH my god, I was reading an article about a person flashing people on ___ street
just last week. They were wearing a ____, JUST LIKE YOU!
*Now you’re connected and the ice is broken!

21. Situation: Seminars and conferences; situational approach

YOU: <Stand nearby conversation and listen in>; Hey, do you know who’s on next?
HER: yes/no
YOU: Oh, yea, I’m really looking forward to that. Is there anyone you’re particularly
interested in seeing? Or, what are you here to learn? Or, what did you think of the last
speaker?
*The idea here is to break the ice and get her talking.

22. Situation: The Park

YOU: Excuse me, do you know where the nearest <café/mall/whatever> is?
HER: Sure, <gives you directions><she also has an accent>
YOU: Thanks. So what country are you from? I think I hear an accent?
HER: I’m from ___
YOU: Oh, yea, I’ve heard of that place. Do they have cars in ____?
*Say this with a smile. Be sure not to offend her.

23. Situation: Park; woman sitting on bench

YOU: Excuse me, I don’t have a ton of time but I’m looking for some advice; would you
date a guy who’s still good friends with his ex?
HER: yes/no/whatever
YOU: Okay, great, thanks for your advice! So, what are you
reading/eating/drinking/whatever she’s doing?

24. Situation: House party (you can also use this at a bar)

YOU: Hey guys, are you having fun? Or …

YOU: Cheers guys! Cool party, isn’t it? How do you know the host?

25. Situation: Restaurant; waitress

YOU: Can you tell me what is better? The ___ or the ____
HER: The ____ is quite good.
YOU: Order the opposite and laugh
*You can also use the same technique at the coffee shop
26. Situation: Restaurant; waitress; she is taking away your plates

HER: How was it?

YOU: <pretending to be upset> I’d like to make a complaint!
HER: Oh really?
YOU: I’m really disappointed, the burger was too good, the waitresses are just too
attractive, etc.
*Say this with a smile on your face. You want to make her laugh.

27. Situation: Supermarket

YOU: Excuse me, can I ask you something? I’m making dinner for some female friends
and I was wondering what women prefer? I could do pasta or chicken.
HER: Chicken/pasta
YOU: I’m also a terrible cook. So, what time are you coming over to make dinner?
*You are flirting with her and making her laugh.