QUALITY TIME AFFECTS CHILD DEVELOPMENT

How the Lack of Quality Time with Parents Affect a Child’s Development

Nadean E. Talley

IMP|THE VIVE PROJECT

Research & Sources Cited

[Include any grant/funding information and a complete correspondence address.]

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Abstract

Parenting is traditionally conceptualized as an exogenous environment that affects child

development. This article considers parent–child relationships during adolescent development.

Evidence suggests that the quality of parent–child relationships determines the nature and extent

of family influence on child development. This article is divided into five sections. First, we

consider theoretical accounts of how adolescent development may impact parent–child

relationships. Second, we consider how parent–child relationships may influence adolescent

development. Third, we consider how parent–child closeness may impact the developmental

course of parent–child relationships and individual differences in these trajectories. Fourth, we

consider how parent–child conflict may impact the same developmental trends and individual

differences. Finally, we consider how varying forms of parent–child closeness and parent–child

conflict may impact adolescent outcomes over time. In each of these areas, special attention will

be given to the role of social, cultural, and contextual factors surrounding parent–child

relationships.
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How the Lack of Quality Time with Parents Affect a Child’s Development

It is apparent that the goal of spending quality family time is to love, understand, and

develop your child as a happy, well-adjusted, and contributing member of society. But what if the

relationship between parent and child is unhealthy? Innumerable studies reveal several negative

outcomes when the child or adolescent does not receive the right love, attention, and guidance

from his or her parents.

Overview

Raising a happy and well-adjusted child is ideal, however, one simple truth is often

overlooked: Children from birth to adulthood need time and attention of quality from their

parents. When most people think of parenting, they picture changing diapers, messy feeding

times, and chasing a screaming child through a crowded grocery store. But parenting goes far

beyond the requirements for meeting the basic survival needs of the child, and parents have a

significant influence on how children turn out, including their personality, emotional

development, and behavioral habits, as well as a host of other factors. The importance of this

time is multifold:

1. The child feels important and loved.

2. He or she has an opportunity to model parent’s behavior.
3. The parent can observe and learn about the child’s strengths and weaknesses in order to
better guide them.
4. The child has a chance to voice their thoughts and feelings.
5. The parent and child develop a stronger bond.

Support.

It is important for the overall development of children that parents be present enough to support

them, and this support fosters confidence and growth in many areas. Sometimes parents become

so anxious to raise a “successful” child that they overlook the importance of spending time
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interacting personally with their child or children. This does not mean rushing from school to

extracurricular activity to supervising homework. Interactive time is that spent with both child

and parent fully engaged in an activity together. Here we will explore the ways parents can

impact the emotional development of their children.

Presence.

Sometimes, just being physically present is not enough. Parents that may be nearby but

that are not emotionally invested or responsive tend to raise children that are more distressed and

less engaged with their play or activities. A study investigating the connection between parent’s

investment and children’s competence suggests that the emotional involvement of parents really

does matter and affects the outcome of their child’s emotional competence and regulation

(Volling, 458). Parents should keep this in mind when considering the quality of the time they

spend with their children, because if they do not invest enough of their time and commitment

into pouring emotionally into their child, the child will struggle to learn how to regulate his

emotions and interact with others appropriately

Playtime.

Play is essential to development because it contributes to the cognitive, physical, social,

and emotional well-being of children and youth. Play also offers an ideal opportunity for parents

to engage fully with their children. Despite the benefits derived from play for both children and

parents, time for free play has been markedly reduced for some children. A variety of factors that

have reduced play include;

1. a hurried lifestyle
2. changes in family structure, and
3. increased attention to academics and enrichment activities at the expense of recess or
free child-centered play.

Play is a source of balance in children’s lives, optimal for developmental milieu.

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A Difference Made.

Activities that will promote happy and healthy children are innumerable and don’t have to be

expensive or difficult to access. The key is to give the child your full attention and vice versa.

Here are some suggestions as stated by :

1. Family meal time. This could become a family event from the selection of the menu,
preparing the food and table, serving, eating together, and cleaning up. During the meal,
children and adolescents can be encouraged to talk about what is interesting to them, and
not necessarily the usual topics like school and work.
2. Homework. If parents can spend positive time with their children without conflict, this
can be a good bonding experience where the school work itself is just a means to the end.
3. Sports. Whether it is playing catch in the yard, going to the gym, or watching the child
play or perform, active and positive involvement is rewarding.
4. Hobbies such as drawing, crafts, collecting are great fodder for conversation.
5. Board games and cards allow for the family to relax and enjoy each other’s company.
6. Extracurricular activities such as Girl/Boy Scouts, 4H, or the debate team, can be a great
opportunity for bonding.
7. Religious activities.
8. Shopping with the family can make a simple chore an event.
9. Attend a concert or show together.
10. Go to the theater, watch television, or rent movies. By watching some shows your child
enjoys, you will learn more about him/her and can use the topics brought up for more
interesting discussions.
11. Outdoor activities such as hiking, walks, bicycling, picnics, or camping.
12. Attend school events together.
13. For younger children, get in the habit of reading to them. For the adolescent, ask what
book they are reading and then read it yourself. In both cases, engage the child in a
discussion about the book.

In summary, family time should be a fun and enjoyable way to raise healthy and happy children

that love and feel loved. Then the child will know that they “matter” and this will be reflected in

their life choices.

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References

Fernandez, MD Gail. “Importance of Family Time on Kids Mental Health and Adjustment to

Life -.” Child Development Institute, CDI, 5 June 2013,

childdevelopmentinfo.com/psychology/importance-of-family-time-on-kids-mental-

health-and-adjustment-to-life/.

Sheffield Morris, A., Silk, J. S., Steinberg, L., Myers, S. S., & Robinson, L. R. (2007). The role

of the family context in the development of emotional regulation.Social Development, 16(2), pp

361-388.

Siegler, R., DeLoache, J., & Eisenberg, N. (2011). How children develop. (3rd ed.). New York:
Worth Publishers.

Volling, B., McElwain, N., Notaro, P., & Herrera, C. (2002). Parents’ emotional availability and
infant emotional competence: Predictors of parent-infant attachment and emerging self-
regulation. Journal of family psychology, 16, pp 447-465.
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