Worksheet 3

- Marriage is neither heaven nor hell, it is simply purgatory. ~ Abraham Lincoln

- Yawning is nature's way of letting married men open their mouths ~ Anon
- No man was ever shot by his wife while doing the dishes. ~ Anon
- If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers. ~
Anon
- Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's
not the man she married? ~ Barbara Streisand
- That married couples can live together day after day is a miracle the Vatican has
overlooked. ~ Bill Cosby
- It would have been a wonderful wedding, had it not been mine. ~ Erma Bombeck
- Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. ~ F. M. Knowles
- Marriage is an adventure, like going to war. ~ G. K. Chesterton
- I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. ~ Groucho Marx
- Marriage is a wonderful institution...but who wants to live in an institution? Groucho
Marx
- Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives. ~ H. L. Mencken
- Before marriage, a man will go home and lie awake all night thinking about something
you said; after marriage, he'll go to sleep before you finish saying it. ~ Helen Rowland
- Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe. Jackie Mason
- I am thinking of taking a fifth wife. Why not? Solomon had a thousand wives and he is a
synonym for wisdom. ~ John Barrymore