STRI DHARMA (CONDUCT OF WOMEN):

1. Character of women:

According to Vedic injunction, women are not allowed to undergo the purifacatory process of
initiation by the sacred thread, nor are they allowed to live as brahmacarini in the asrama of the
spiritual master; nor are they advised to undergo the strict disciplinary procedure; nor are they very
much expert in discussing philosophy or self realization.
Krsna book.I.p.164

As monkeys, jackals and dogs are unsteady in their sexual relationships and want newer and newer
friends every day, Women who live independently seek new freinds daily. Friendship with such a
woman is never permanent. This is the opinion of the learned scholars.
SB8.9.10

As far as the women class are concerned they are accepted as a power of inspiration for men. As
such women are more powerful than men.... such powerful women are controlled by shyness.
therfore, shyness is important for women. Once this control valve is loosened, women can create
havoc in society by adultery.
SB1.9.27

2. As a Child:

It is essential, therefore, that girls as well as boys be trained to discharge spiritual duties so that at the
time of cooperation both will be benefited. The training of the boy is brahmacarya, and the training
of the girl is chastity.
Sb3.14.17

For a woman, both the husband and the father are equally worshipable. The husband is the protector
of a woman during her youthful life, whereas the father is her protector during her childhood. The
both are worshipable, but especially the father because he is the giver of the body.
SB4.3.24

3. As a Wife:

A girl must be married. This is vedic culture. A woman is supposed to be always dependent--in her
childhood she is dependent on her father in youth on her husband, and in old age on her elderly sons.
According to Manu Samhita, she is never independent. Independence for a woman means miserable
life.
SB 9.10.27

Duties as a Wife:

a. General Duties (from Visnu Smrti):

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The wife should follow the vratas of her husband. She does not undergo any separate vrata, but by
serving her husband she reaps the results of her husband's activities.
She should worship her mother in law, her father in law, the Supreme Lord and guests.
She should keep the household clean and pleasantly decorated.
She should keep the household articles and furnishings in good condition.
She should be frugal, not extragavant or wasteful.
She should be expert at mangala acara: saying prayer sfor auspiciousness, and preparing auspicious
ceremonies.
While her husband is away travelling she should not decorate herself or visit other houses, engage in
recreations, or remain visible in the yard or window.
She should not perform any activity independently.
The woman undergoes the samskaras but without vedic mantra, except for the wedding ceremony.
She should depend on her father when she is a child, on her husband when she is in her youth, and on
her son when she is old.
She should observe brahmacarya after her husband's death.

After eating you should not go out ot the street without having washed your mouth, hands and
feet. You should not go out in the evening or with your hair loose, nor should you go out unless
you are properly decorated with ornaments. You should not leave the house unless you are very
grave and are sufficiently covered.

You should not lie down without having washed both of your feet or without being purified, nor with
wet feet or with your head pointed west or north. You should not lie naked, or with other women,
or during the sunrise or sunet.
putting on washed clothing, being always pure and being adorned with tumeric, sandalwood pulp
and other auspiciousitems, before breakfast one should worship the cows, the brahmanas, the
goddess of fortune and the Supreme Personality of Godhead.
SB6.18.50-53

b. Conduct during Asauca (period of impurity):

A woman is impure for the first three days of her menstrual cycle. If a person touches her during this
time he must bathe fully for purification. Therefore she should withdraw from all activities.

The woman should not visit public places or holy places and avoid association with others.

She should not eat her meals in public, bu in her room.

She should avoid services for the deity, such as cooking, sewing, cleaning, garland making.

She should avoid touching sacred articles such as fire, scripture, mala, pictures ,tilaka, and not chant
gayatri mantra, nor should she accept mahaprasad, garlands, carnamrta.

She should also avoid using articles used in normal times, such as asana, and clothing but rather keep
special clothing and room etc for this occasion.

She should eat out of clay dishes which may be discarded.

She should sleep on the floor.

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She should take ample rest during this time to avoid weakness of body during the rest of the month,
but she should not lseep during the day.

She should not apply cosmetics or scents.

She should wear one cloth during that period.

She should bind the hair, and not comb it. She should notcut her nails, and should not take full bath.

She should not brush her teeth.

She should not laugh.

After three complete nights from the onset, she should take full bath on the fourth morning at sunrise
and purify all articles used during the period of seclusion by washing or exposing to sunlight.

She may then resume normal activities.

c. Cooperation with husband:

A faithful wife is supposed to cooperate with her husband in fulfilling all material desires so that he
can then come comfortable and execute spiritual activities for the perfection of life. If, however, the
husband is progressive in spiritual advancement, the wife undoubtedly shares in his acitivties, and
thus both the wife and the husband profit in spiritual perfection.
Sb3.14.17

d. Satisfying the husband:

At the same time it is also enjoined that a wife should never present herself before the husband in
an unclean state. She must decorate herself with ornaments and good dress and should always be
present before the husband in a happy and joyous mood.
SB 1.11.31

Only the widows are allowed to have head shaved. You remain the beautiful maid servant of
Krsna. That is your business, and you should dress yourself always very nicely so that Krsna, by
seeing you will be pleased. Don't try to be ugly before Krsna. Krsna does not like ugly gopies.
Haimavati, June 15, 1972

If any wife wants to be happy with her husband, she must try to understand her husbafd's
temperment and please him. This is victory for a woman.
SB9.3.10

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The husband is a very intimate friend, therefore the wife must render service just like an intimate
friend, and at the same time she must understand that the husband is superior in position, and thus
she must offer him all respect. Even if there is some wrong on the part of the husband, the wife must
tolerate it, and thus there will be no misunderstanding between husband and wife. ...A wife cannot
call her husband by name. ...A person becomes agitated by so many material contacts in the outside
world; there fore, in his home life he must be treated by his wife with sweet words.
SB 3.23.2

A husband is the supreme demigod for a woman. The supreme Personality of Godhead, Lord
Vasudeva, the husband of the goddess of fortune, is situated in everyone's heart and is worshipped
through the various names and forms of the demigods by fruitive workers. Similarly, a husband
represents the Lord as the object of worship for a woman.
SB6.18.34

It is very difficult to satisfy a woman by a person who has no good income, neither very good
health. The woman as a class want sufficient means to eat, and decorate and at the same time full
satisfaction of sex. Any husband who cannot satisfy his wife by these three items must meet all these
problems, and as soon as one becomes engaged in solving these problems it is very difficult to make
any progress in Krsna consciousness. If one is serious to make any success in the matter of Krsna
consciousness, one should avoid the association of woman as far as possible.
letter from Srila Prabhupada,
Gargamuni, Nov.13, 1967

If husband and wife are attached to one another for advancement in Krsna consciousness, their
relationship of cooperation is very effective for such advancement.
SB 6.18.34

e. Chastity:

The relationship between husband and wife is firmly established when the wife is faithful and the
husband sincere. Then even if the wife, being weaker, is unble to execute devotional service with her
husband, if she is chaste and sincere she shares half of her husband's activities.
SB6.19.18

By vedic injuction, the wife is accepted as the better half of a man's body becuse she is supposed to
be responsible for discharging half of the duties of the husband.
SB3.14.19

By staying chaste and faithful to her husband, a woman enriches herself with supernatural power.
SB 9.10.27

Females are not meant for the renounced order of life; they should be faithful to their good husbands,
for if a husband is competent for liberation, his wife will also achieve liberation with him. As stated
in the sastra, the results of a husband's pious activities are shared by his wife. Therefore a woman's
duty is to be very chaste and faithful to her husband.
SB 6.6.1
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To render service to the husband, to be always favorably disposed towards the husband, to be
equally well disposed toward the husband's relatives and friends, and to follow the vows of the
husband: these are the four principles to be followed by women described as chaste.
SB7.11.25

A chaste woman must dress nicely and decorate herself with golden ornaments for the pleasure of
her husband. Always wearing clean and attractive garments, she should sweep and clean the
household with water and other liquids so that the entire house is always pure and clean. She should
collect the houseold paraphernalia and keep the house always aromatic with incense and flowers and
must be ready to execute the desires of her husband. Being modest and thoughtful controlling her
senses, and speaking in sweet words, a chaste woman should engage in the service of her husband
with love, according to time and circumstances.

A chaste woman should not be greedy, but satisfied in all circumsntances. She must be very expert in
handling household affairs and should be fully conversant with religious principles. She should speak
pleasingly and truthfully and should be very careful and always clean and pure. Thus a chaste
woman should engage with affection in the service of a husband who not fallen.
SB 7. 11. 25-28, text

The actual system is that the husband is spiritual master to his wife, but if the wife can bring her
husband into practicing this process, then it is all right that the husband accepts wife as spiritual
master.
Moundsville, June 14, 1969

According to Vedic culture a woman who accepts a paramour or second husband in the presence of
the husband she has married is certainly responsbile for the degradation of her father's family and the
family of her husband.
SB9.3.21

f. Raising Children:

For you, child worship is more important than deityh worship. If you cannot spend time with him,
then stop the duties of pujari. At least you must take good care of your son until he is four years old,
and if after that time you are unable any more to take care of him then we shall arrange. These
children are given to us by Krsna, they are Vaisnavas and we must be very careful to protect
them...they are vaikuntha children, and we are very fortunate that we can give them a chance to
advance further in Krsna consciousness. That is a very great responsibility. Do not neglect it or be
confused . Your duty is very clear.

Arundhati July 30, 1972

You do not have any desire for children. Then why did yo marry? If you do not want children, then
why did you marry? You should not take sannaysa.
Nalinikanta Sept. 3, 1975

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 Children may be recommended for initiation when they are twelve years old. We should avoid as
far as possible any physical punishment to train children. It is better to use sweet words or if it is
absolutely necessary to punish them you bind them with ropes in one place or show the cane, but do
not use. The most important thing is to see that somehow or other the children are always engaged
in some kind of Krsna conscious activity. They will naturally develop a taste for it.
Svati Jan, 1972

5. Fallen Husband:

Although the duties of a woman are different from those of a man, a chaste woman is not meant to
serve a fallen husband. If her husband is fallen, it is recommended that she give up his association.
If her husband is fallen, it is recommended that she give up his association. Giving up the
association of her husband does not mean, however, that a woman should marry again and thus
indulge in prostitution. If a chaste woman unfortunately marries a husband who is fallen, she should
live separately from him. Similarly, a husband can separate himself from a woman who is not chaste
according to the description of the sastra.
SB7.11.28 purport

When a husband falls down it is the wife's duty to relinquish the relationship.
CC Madhya v.6.p.135

6. As A Widow:

A woman's duty or religious principle is to serve her husband in all conditions.... But when the
husband takes the renounced order of life, namely sannyasa, the wife is to return home and become a
saintly woman, setting an example for her children and daughters-in-law and showing them how to
live a life of austerity.
SB4.23.20

7. As A Vaisnavi:

Unless elevated to spiritual consciousness, everyone is conditioned and fallen, what to speak of
women, who are less intelligent than men. On the spiritual platform however when one is elevated
to qh"Cwhether one is a man, woman , sudra or whatever, everyone is equal.
SB9.14.36

Regarding the disturbance made by the women devotees, they are also living beings. They also come
to Krsna. So consciously I cannot deny them. If our male members, the brahmacaris and sannyasis,
become steady in Krsna consciousness, there is no problem. It is the duty of the male members to be
very steady and cautious. This can be done by regular chanting like Haridas Thakur did. Whenever
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there is a young woman, we should remember Haridas Thakur and beg his mercy to protect us. And
we should think that these beautiful gopis are meant for the enjoyment of Krsna.
letter from Sril Prabhupada, Gargamuni Swami, Sept. 29,
1975

If a woman can lecture nicely and to the point, we should hear her carefully. That is our philosophy.
But if a man can speak better thn a woman, the man should be given first preference. But even
though a woman is less intelligent, a sincere soul should be given proper chance to speak, because
we want so many preachers, both men and women.
letter from Srila Prabhupada,
Jaigovinda, Feb.5, 1969

Duties of a Son:

Ason who acts by anticipating what his father wants him to do is first class, one who acts upon
receiving his father's order is second class, and one who executes his father's order irreverently is
third class. But a son who refuses his father's order is like his father's stool.
SB.9.18.44

He (Maharaj Prthu) performed the duty of a son who delivers his father from hellish conditions. The
word putra means one who delivers from hell, called put. That is a worthy son.
Sb2.7.9

Even if one is the Supreme Lord, one must serve his parents. A son is indebted to his parents in so
many ways and it is the duty of the son to serve his parents however great the son may. be.