WorleySturt 1

Andre WorleySturt

Professor Malcolm Campbell

English

08 November 2018

Fatherless Households: The Destruction of America’s Youth

 WorleySturt 2

Giving birth outside of marriage was almost unheard of 50 years ago, but over the past

few decades single motherhood has become more and more common. Between 1960 and 2016

the population of kids with two parents has decreased from 88% to 69%; during this time, the

percent of single mothers increased from 8% to 23% while single fathers increased from 3% to

4%. Today there are currently 8.5 million single mothers and 2.5 million single fathers in the

U.S. (US Census Bureau). In the year 2016, 27% of single mothers were jobless for the entire

year, 31.6% of them were food insecure at some time, and 35.6% of them lived in poverty (Lee,

Dawn).

If these facts weren’t depraved enough, the effects of single motherhood on their children

most certainly are. According to the National Fatherhood Initiative, kids raised by a single

mother are more likely to commit crimes and go to prison, 7 times more likely to get pregnant as

a teen, more likely to abuse drugs and alcohol, 2 times more likely to suffer from obesity, 2 times

more likely to drop out of high school, and are 279% more likely to carry guns and deal drugs.

The Cause of Fatherless Children

There are two major groups of single mothers: those who were previously married and

those who weren’t. In 2011, 50% of single mothers were divorced, separated, or widowed; 44%

were never married; and 6% were married, but their spouses were not living in the household

(Wang, Wendy).

Dr. Jordan B. Peterson, a professor and clinical psychologist, briefly talks about divorce

in one of his online lectures. He explains that marriage will not solve all problems, but there is

an extremely detrimental cost to divorce. He says that divorce is expensive, and by the end of
 WorleySturt 3

the process either one or both parents will become poor. He also states that divorce takes a big

chunk out a person’s life and will disrupt the relationship between the parents and their kids.

If what Dr. Peterson says is true, then why are so many couples choosing to divorce? It

makes sense that a couple could grow apart after years of being together, but the decision to

divorce rarely considers the future and well-being of the children; at least by one of the parents.

Sure, some relationships between spouses are toxic and staying in these relationships will have a

negative impact on everyone, including the children. Maybe the father is an abusive drug addict,

or the mother is schizophrenic and delusional, but there are also fathers that decide to run away

from the responsibility of raising a family and mothers that decide that they can raise their

children better without interference from a man. It seems as if most parents are separating before

they consider the effect that a separation will have on their children.

Alexia Fernández Campbell, a former staff writer at The Atlantic, wrote an article where

she assessed research from sociologists at John Hopkins University and the University of

Melbourne to answer the question “Why are so many millennials having children out of

wedlock?” She found that it wasn’t random mothers having kids out of wedlock, but that these

mothers disproportionately came from a specific group who didn’t have college degrees, lived in

areas with high income inequality, and tended to not have very bright job prospects. It could be

inferred that these mothers did not want to marry someone who had a low paying job, but they

would have a kid with them.

Nowadays, people don’t understand the importance of raising a child as a couple.

Raising a child is expensive, time consuming, and requires both a mother and a father to be done

correctly. Dr. Peterson says, “The idea that you be divorced once you have children, that’s kind

of a stupid idea, because you can’t.” What he means by this is that marriage is a bond created
 WorleySturt 4

more for the sake of the children and less for the sake of the spouses. The bond of marriage

makes sure children don’t have to live in poverty and have food every day, but the bond of

marriage also makes sure that children don’t become fatherless and suffer the negative effects of

becoming a fatherless child.

The Effects of Fatherless Children

Jeanine Connor, a child and adolescent psychodynamic psychotherapist, writes in a short

essay, “Children without a dad have a sense of something missing and are likely to internalize

that sense so that they feel inadequate too.” She also writes, “There is a fundamental difference

between a father figure and a dad proper that goes beyond the biological.”

Connor has worked with countless kids in her Thinking and Feeling group, and she sees

how confused fatherless children are. Connor believes having a father makes people feel like

they are real, so the kids without fathers don’t feel whole. She would look these children and

wonder about the kinds of adults they would grow up to be. She imagined them growing up to

be adults with a “fragmented sense of self, endlessly striving for perfection in an imperfect

world,” and the only thing that could’ve fixed them was growing up with a biological father.

Even the greatest step-father in the world can’t compete with the realness of a biological father.

It could be argued that Connor’s words are simply an opinion, or maybe an interpretation

of her experiences, but there has been significant research done over the years that supports her

words. Not only is there a difference between growing up with a biological father vs a step-

father, but there are significant negative effects of not having a father at all.

In “The Causal Effects of Father Absence”, a group of data analysts identify 47 articles

and examine the effects of father absence on children in four categories: educational attainment,
 WorleySturt 5

mental health, relationship formation and stability, and labor force success. They found that

when it comes to education, a fatherless child’s test scores will remain about the same and they

will maintain positive aspirations for the future, but they are more likely to drop out of high

school; this is likely due to problem behaviors rather than cognitive ability. The research team

also found that fatherless children are more likely to have social and emotional problems, more

likely to have kids of their own at a young age, more likely to have negative effects on their

social-emotional development and are more likely to participate in risky behavior (such as

smoking and unprotected sex). There is no substantial evidence that fatherlessness affects a

child’s future family outcomes, marriage, divorce, college, income, or economic stability

(McLanahan, Sara).

This information is important because it proves that there are significant negative effects

of being fatherless. Children may seem like they are perfectly fine while being raised by a single

mother, but there is a large part of their life that is missing, and they will miss out on a lot of

learning experiences without a father. This lack of experience won’t mean much when the

children are younger, but when they get older the effects will become clearer. A fatherless child

will be less disciplined and will be more susceptible to getting into trouble, sometimes life

altering trouble. A fatherless child is more prone to start using drugs, leading them down a path

that will cause them many hardships; a fatherless child is more prone to getting pregnant, which

would just repeat the situation they grew in of being fatherless; and a fatherless child is more

prone to dropping out of high school, ruining their chance of living a fulfilling life. There are

countless negative effects of growing up without a father, and not a single positive one.

Conclusion
 WorleySturt 6

In this paper I explored why there are so many single mothers today and how single

motherhood can have a negative impact on a child’s life. Both men and women alike need to

become educated on raising children before having children. Too many people are having

children before they are prepared. This causes drastic changes to their lives, often for the worse,

plunging them into financial instability and poverty, reducing their chances of obtaining a higher

education, and guaranteeing an incredibly difficult and stressful life. Fathers need to act like

men and take responsibility for raising their children and mothers need to understand that they

cannot raise their children by themselves. Parents need to understand the importance of marriage

to ensure that their children grow up physically and mentally healthy.

If parents choose to separate and a child ends up being raised by a single mother, the

child’s chances of growing up to become a successful adult decrease. Even if the child manages

to complete high school and stays away from drugs, they will still have to deal with emotional

problems related to being fatherless. No matter how successful that child ends up being in the

future, they will always know that they missed out on one of the most important relationships of

their lives. They will always know that their father chose to abandon them to chase after his own

selfish desires. They will always know that their childhood and growth was underdeveloped, and

that it can never be changed.

When a mother and a father choose to separate, they are choosing to ruin their children.

They may only be ruining a small part of them or they may be utterly destroying the child’s life,

but one way or another, damage will be done. The only way to ensure the greatest possible

outcome for a child is to raise him/her as a couple; anything else is risking destruction.
 WorleySturt 7

References
Campbell, Alexia Fernández. “Why Are So Many Millennials Having Children Out of

Wedlock?” The Atlantic, Atlantic Media Company, 18 July 2016,

www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2016/07/why-are-so-many-millennials-having-

children-out-of-wedlock/491753/.

Connor, Jeanine. “Fatherless Worlds.” Therapy Today, vol. 26, no. 5, June 2015, p. 4.

EBSCOhost,

librarylink.uncc.edu/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com.librarylink.uncc.edu/login.asp

x?direct=true&db=a9h&AN=103422086&site=ehost-live&scope=site

Lee, Dawn. Single Mother Guide. singlemotherguide.com/. Accessed 21 Oct. 2018

McLanahan, Sara, et al. “The Causal Effects of Father Absence.” Annual Review of Sociology,

vol. 39, July 2013, pp. 399–427. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1146/annurev-soc-071312-145704.

National Fatherhood Initiative. “Father Involvement Programs for Organizations and Families |

NFI.” Father Involvement Programs for Organizations and Families | NFI,

www.fatherhood.org/.

Peterson, Jordan B. “2017 Maps of Meaning 6: Story and Metastory (Part 2).” YouTube,

YouTube, 20 Feb. 2017, www.youtube.com/watch?v=nsZ8XqHPjI4.

 WorleySturt 8

US Census Bureau. “The Majority of Children Live with Two Parents, Census Bureau Reports.”

The United States Census Bureau, 10 Apr. 2018, www.census.gov/newsroom/press-

releases/2016/cb16-192.html.

Wang, Wendy, et al. “Chapter 4: Single Mothers.” Pew Research Center's Social &

Demographic Trends Project, Pew Research Center's Social & Demographic Trends

Project, 29 May 2013, www.pewsocialtrends.org/2013/05/29/chapter-4-single-mothers/.

WorleySturt 9
WorleySturt 10