Hi my name is Amina Suzuki. I’m Junior student in origins high school.

Some of my

hobbies are playing basketball and reading books. My favourite subject is biology.

Throughout my time at origins, I have grown a lot in many diferrent ways. But mainly I

have improved in my communication skills. I said that because during my freshmen

year, I was quite shy student and used to hesitate from greeting and communicating

with new people. I was also new to the United states at that time, so It was challenging

for me to adapt to this environmemt. However, since origin high school is so diverse and

when I started talking to new people, I found pleasure in it. People would tell me about

their culture, food and their traditional ways, which I really enjoy it. So now when I have

to talk to new people, I talk to them in a very openly manner and engage myself with

them. Some of the people that played significant role in my growth are my teachers and

my friends. These people have been always by my side when I need them the most. I

remember when I recently came to America, I was nervous and having little trouble in

language. However, my teachers and friends would help me and support me, which

used to give me so much encouragement and motivation as well. My ambition in life is

to become a doctor. I haven’t yet decided what kind of doctor I want to be, but most

likely I would prefer pediatrician because I like spending time with kids. Today I will talk

about my process of growth at origins. One of the KCS strategy that I choose to reflect

on is communication. Communication means the ability to inform, convey and share

ideas in multiple formats. I chose this one because as I mentioned before that during my

freshmen year, I wasn’t that good at talking with new people. Just like I had

commuication trouble with people, I also struggled in my academics too. During my

freshman year, I was struggling most in communications because at that time I didn’t
had that formal tone and effective style of writing. Therefore I had to spend many hours

just to complete a single assignment. I have struggled a lot in sharing my view point and

thought process with others. One thing which I’m pretty certain about is that

communication skill will play a major role in my career. It’s because as a doctor, you

suppose to explain people the causes and effects of particular illness or medicine. So if

you are good at communication, it will help patient to understand why he/she should

listen to doctor’s precaution. In short, communication shows person’s credibility.

An example, which illustrates my growth

Amina Suzuki

Mr Farrell

7 Feb,2017

ELA 9

The importance of persuasions are major and significant role in real life or in

America.Persuasion probably impact to an audience or any other . For example someone has a

speech for any kind of purpose,He/She must use logos,ethos and pathos.without these things you

cannot support your claim.so these things are essential for everyone. Ethos is an appeal to

ethics,and is way of convincing someone of the character or credibility of the persuader. Pathos

is an appeal to emotion,and is way of convincing of an audience of the deliberations by creating

such a emotional response. Logos is an appeal to logic,and is way of persuading at anyone by

some reasonable doubts and facts. The story of name is “Twelve Angry Men”.There is a young

Hispanic man who was charged with killing his father and twelve jurors who are going to decide
whether boy is guilty or not.There is a lot of deliberations,arguments and stubbornness. To what

extent does persuasion depend on reasoning (or logos)? Persuasion depends on logos to an equal

extent as pathos.

Textual evidence#1:”The old man maybe he didn’t lie,

But then just maybe he did.Maybe the old man doesn’t like the kid that’s why”.

Claim: In this statement his pathos are saying maybe he did not lie but maybe he did.He is not

denying or refusing the facts but he is trying to say that there is possibility.There is not

reasonable doubts.

Textual evidence#2:”For the kid to be guilty he must be stupid, than smart, then stupid and then

smart and so on, and, also, for the kid to be guilty the old man downstairs must be a liar half of

the time and the other half of the time he must tell the truth.you can reasonable doubt”.

Claim: This statement demonstrates that there is both facts and pathos.Probably the old man is

not completely

lying but also not completely saying the truth.There is a possibility that someone else did,like

some other person

having a grudge against murderer,for taking the revenge from murderer.

Textual Evidence#3:”It’s just that i looked at him for a very long time.The seam of his

jacket was split under his arm.Did you notice that?He was a very old man with a torn jacket,and

he carries two canes.I think i know him better than anyone here.This is a
quite,frightened,insignificant man who has been nothing all his life-who has never had

recognition-his name in the newspapers.Nobody knows him after seventy -five years. This is a

very sad thing.A man like this needs to be recognized-to be questioned,and listened to,and

quoted just once.This is very important…….”

Claim: In this quote there are both of facts and logos.The juror nine knows the old man very well

that he is old enough and also weak.So this is the fact.And pathos(feelings)is that the old man is

unpopular and he wants to may be become famous or the old man just believing in his ownself

by strong stubbornness that the boy is guilty…...

Counterclaim:Persuasion doesn’t depend on pathos to equal extent as logos.

Rebuttal:I disagree.I will rather say that both are main.For instance “i just think he is guilty. I

thought it was obvious.I mean that nobody proved otherwise”. In this statement it’s only describe

the facts which is obvious.It’s not clear probably somebody else deliberately did this murder who

disliked or execrated the murder. It’s uncertain he just saw the majority of vote or facts and

say”yes he is guilty”.

Conclusion:

So,in the situation especially the discussion is about someone’s life then we should

considerably think about the things.Not just only depend on facts but rather pathos and ethos

too.It’s because sometimes everything is not as it seems and perhaps there is propaganda by

someone.These are some of my reasons for supporting my claim that persuasion depends on

logos to an equal extent as pathos

 TASK RUBRIC

PROBLEM Inquiry Question: To what extent does persuasion

FORMULATION:
(Not Scored) depend on reasoning (or logos)?

Learning Goals 4.0 3.0 2.0 1.0 0.0

I can Even with

RESEARCH 3:
Collects information and investigate With help, I help, I
I can classify I can
data necessary to solve outside can identify cannot
textual identify
the problem as sources for textual identify
formulated, drawing evidence as textual
relevant textual evidence textual
evidence from support for evidence as
informational texts, evidence to as support evidence
claims and support for
conducting an support claims for my as support
investigation, or
counterclaims. my claim.
counterclaims, claim. for my
generating data.
and rebuttals. claim.

I can
INTERPRETATION annotate Even with
I can critique I can critique With help, I
2: with an open help, I
ideas and take ideas within a can
Evaluates the claim(s), mind using cannot
evidence, and reasoning an informed text by thinking annotate
strategies annotate
behind currently position on an with an open ideas
accepted explanations or issue raised by
such as ideas
mind and a within a
solutions to determine summarizing within a
a text. skeptical mind. reading.
the merits of arguments. and reading.
clarifying.
 I can describe
I can create a
the
principle for Even with
relationship I can With help, I
use of logos help, I
between logos identify can
(reasoning) cannot
COMMUNICATION (reasoning) instances of introduce
within and introduce
1: and persuasion persuasion and groups
across and groups
Incorporates ideas and within and and group ideas and
supporting evidence paragraphs, ideas and
across my ideas information
purposefully using using information
structures that
paragraphs, through a through a
transitions in a through a
demonstrate the line of using basic use of basic use
way that basic use
reasoning. transitions in a paragraph of
clarifies the of
way that allows structure and paragraph
reasoning and paragraph
the audience to transitions. structure.
logic of my structure.
follow my
argument.
argument.

I can submit a
I can submit a I can submit
PRECISION/ final product With help, I
final product a final
ACCURACY 7: that meets or can submit Even with
that meets all product that
Assures that the final exceeds all a final help, I
product meets all
ELA standards attempts all
ELA standards product cannot
discipline-specific for language, ELA
for language, that submit a
standards for language, academic standards for
terms, expressions, academic attempts final
vocabulary, language
rules, terminology, and vocabulary, ELA product.
conventions.
and and
and standards.
conventions. conventions.
conventions.

For this assignmet, I was required to read a “Twelve angry men” book, which was about young

Hispanic man who was charged with killing his father and there are twelve jurors who are going

to decide whether boy is guilty or not. So based on that book I was required to make my own

claim and then I had to wrie a essay based on my own created claim. My claim was “persuasion

depend on logos to an equal extent as pathos”. There are several things that I could have

improved in this essay. For instance I should have provided my esssay with more sufficient and
relevant evidences. It’s because if you are arguing about something, you need to make a logic in

your argument and have to have multiple evidence to prove that why your point is valid and

correct. It’s because if you are arguing without making logic then your whole argument is

pointless. So communication plays a significant role in academics life and in our personal life,

because no matter what field or what career you are going to you are going to face

communication. For instance, in order to get the job you have to give a interview and have to

collaborae with new people. So if you are good at communication, it can make things less

stressful.

Another example:

Many women in the the world are affected by Pelvic Inflammatory disease. It is a serious

infection but many aren’t aware of this disease. People think it’s just a simple infection, but as a matter

of fact it’s a infectious disease. It’s a common disease and women worldwide problem. According to

the National STD curriculum www.std.uw.edu , this illness is pretty much common. There isn't a very

accurate percentage but estimation shows that 4.4% are affected among sexually experienced women.

And this disease mostly happens in non-Hispanic black race.

I selected this topic because my cousin(doctor) and I were discussing the most common disease in our

society currently. She told me that majority of cases that she has been diagnosing in her patients is PID.

Then it just caught my interest and developed my curiosity for this topic.

Pelvic inflammatory disease is a bacterial infection of the female reproductive organs. PID

usually occurs as the result of spread of a sexually transmitted disease STD, but this is not the only
reason for this illness. PID can also caused by other types of bacteria which normally found in the

vagina and that could be responsible for this disease. Bacteria which already found in vagina can

spread to the fallopian tube or in uterus and eventually cause infection www.medlineplus.gov There

are several reproductive structure that can be affected by this illness which includes ovaries, uterus,

cervix and fallopian tube. When bacteria enter these areas, it cause infection and damage these specific

female’s reproductive organs. For instance it can cause swelling or produce pus in fallopian tubes. It

may also create scar tissues at damage areas, because scar tissue repairs the damage in the skin. But

what are the functions of theses organ? So Fallopian tube are the tubes that carry the eggs from the

ovary to the uterus and eventually fertilization occurs in tube as well. Ovary is the structure where

women produce its eggs and it also produce hormones which are progesterone and estrogen. And

uterus is where embryo develops into a fetus, in other words where baby grows. The reproductive

structure can definitely have negative impact by the illness. When scar tissue being formed in the

Fallopian tube, it prevents sperm and egg to meet. Therefore egg would not be able to travel to its

correct place, at uterus and started growing in the Fallopian tube. This is known as Ectopic pregnancy,

and it's dangerous because Fallopian tube does not expand the way uterus does and tubes can be burst

suddenly.
 According to National STD curriculum www.std.uw.edu , the non-Hispanic black race has one

of the highest percentage for PID. This data shows that non-Hispanic black has affected by almost 15%

while non-Hispanic White has less than 10% of people are affected.

www.std.uw.edu

There are few risk factors which include, having multiple sex partners, the more partners you have the

greater your risk is. Sex at younger can also be risk factor. There are several symptoms of PID for your
awareness which include a pain during sex, or by having irregular periods or painful periods. One of

the common symptom is pain in lower abdomen www.mayoclinic.org. All of these mentioned above

symptoms are noticeable and can help you to concern your doctor.

Interestingly this illness can be preventable. You can avoid having multiple sex partners, or

avoid too much sex attempts. In this way you may have less chance of STD(sexually transmitted

disease). Some of current cures available for PID is by taking antibiotics regularly, but if illness get

worse then it may require surgery www.acog.org . Some of new thing that I learned is that PID is

pretty common and serious health problem in US, which can lead to Ectopic pregnancy. Some of the

questions that I want to go more in depth include: Is PID only common in US ? Is PID worldwide health

issue? And Is PID only occurs at young age? The information I collected from this topic is really helpful

and can be useful near future. Since I researched on this topic briefly, I can aware someone who might

suffering through this illness. For example by informing them some of treatments, that are available

for this illness.

Work cited :

National STD Curriculum, www.std.uw.edu/.

“Mayo Clinic.” Mayo Clinic, Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research,

www.mayoclinic.org/.

“MedlinePlus - Health Information from the National Library of Medicine.” MedlinePlus Trusted

Health Information for You, medlineplus.gov/.

“Womens Health Care Physicians.” The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists -

ACOG, www.acog.org/.
 4 3 2 1 0

RESEARCH 1: More than 3 3 relevant 2-3 relevant 1-2 relevant No works

Considers a full range relevant sources are sources are sources are cited section.
of appropriate sources are cited and the cited and only cited and
resources and
cited and the majority of one of them none are from
determines how and
majority are them are from are from .org, .org, .edu, or
where to locate
from .org, .org, .edu, or .edu, or .gov .gov websites.
available informational
material and source .edu, or .gov .gov websites. websites.
data. websites.
INTERPRETATION 1: All graphical Graphical and Graphical and Graphical and No Data
Analyzes data, sources, and statistical statistical or statistical statistical data shown.
and/or evidence using data are data are data is briefly is shown but
tools, technologies,
explained in explained in mentioned in with no
and/or models in order
such a way to such a way to the paper but further
to make valid and
show full show an with little explanation.
reliable claims or
determine a solution. understanding understandin elaboration.
of what the g of what the
data data
represents. represents.

COMMUNICATION 1: All data and Data and Some data All or most No attempt is
Incorporates ideas and sources are sources are and or data and or made to
supporting evidence purposefully used sources, while sources, while incorporate
purposefully using
used to purposely to relevant to the relevant to the evidence
structures that
support claims support topic, may not topic, may not (sources or
demonstrate the line of
and further claims made be used be used data) into line
reasoning.
the about the purposely purposely of reasoning.
understanding reproductive (perhaps due (perhaps due
of the disorder to lack of to lack of
reproductive being understandin understandin
disorder researched. g of data.) g of data.)
researched.

PRECISION / No content, 1 or 2 More than 2 Grammatical, Many

ACCURACY 7: grammatical grammatical/ grammatical/ spelling, and grammatical
Assures that the final or spelling spelling spelling content errors and spelling
product meets all
errors present. errors errors throughout. errors. Paper
discipline-specific
present. present. very difficult
standards for
OR to read and
language, terms,
expressions, rules, Content or
terminology, and errors understand
conventions. present. as a result.

COMMUNICATION / Correctly and Effort made Some Little No Feedback

ACCURACY: completely to feedback feedback implemented
Incorporates feedback implements implemented implemented implemented. .
to make appropriate
all feedback. all feedback. but not all.
revisions.
For this assignment, I was required to research on one specific illness or disease. The topic that I

chose was Pelvic Inflammantary disease.

This shows my growth because in this assignment, I have explained the causes and effects of

diesease by collecting valid and reliable evidence in order to support my explanation. Moreover,

in this assignment, I didn’t only use textual expanation but I have also included bar graph, in

order to expain diesease in more than one format. And last but not least I have also expalined

why I chose this topic as my main focus, what are some reasons that caught my attention for this

specific diesease. These example shows my growth because I was able to interpret things and

provide logical explanation to the audience.