2018-12-01 Readers Digest India PDF

DECEMBER
2018
`100
BEWARE! HE WANTS TO BREAK YOUR

HEART, AND YOUR BANK
PAGE 88
A MONSTER AND A GENTLEMAN

PAGE 102
THE SEASON
OF MIRACLES
Real-life stories of hope and faith
PAGE 56
CHASING GEORGE HARRISON

PAGE 66
13 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT

THE COMMON COLD
PAGE 152
DEPARTMENT OF WIT: TWINKLE KHANNA .......... 18

PANIC ON THE MOUNTAIN ...................................... 76
THE CHRISTMAS GUITAR ........................................ 84
LAUGHTER, THE BEST MEDICINE .......................... 96
POWER UP YOUR VOCABULARY ........................... 157
Contents DECEMBER 2018
Cover Story 114 HOME, BUT NOT ALONE

56 A SEASON OF MIRACLES SOS villages bring hope
Stories of wonder and faith. to orphans.
SANGHAMITRA CHAKRABORTY
My Story
66 HOW I TICKED OFF 120 SCENT OF A WOMAN
GEORGE HARRISON ... Finding the perfect perfume,
... And got into Martin and oneself.
Scorcese’s film. C. Y. GOPINATH KATHERINE LAIDLAW
70 ’TIS THE SEASON OF 124 JUST TOO

SOCIAL DISASTERS EMBARRASSED
Tips to save yourself from party Help for health
fouls. LAURA LEE problems you don’t
want to talk about.
Drama in Real Life LINA ZELDOVICH
76 PANIC ON THE
MOUNTAIN 130 ICELAND’S
Two men face a bear—and WATER CURE
their own fear. GREG BOSWELL The secret to the
country’s happiness
84 THE CHRISTMAS GUITAR may be in its
A Yuletide gift unwraps long- communal pools.
lost memories. JEAN CHAVOT DAN KOIS
88 BEWARE! HE WANTS TO Book Bonus
BREAK YOUR HEART 138 THE CALL

AND YOUR BANK OF THE BIG
Cyber crimes against the elderly BLUE
are on the rise. ELEANOR ROSE Circumnavigating
the globe on a
102 A MONSTER AND A sailboat, with
GENTLEMAN one good leg.
MAJOR A. K. SINGH
The Ramsay villain who’s a real
romantic. SHAMYA DASGUPTA
YAS I R I Q B A L
108 SEAT WITH A VIEW

Photos from the flight deck.
P. | 138
DAVID THOMAS AND PAUL FOX
READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 3

Vol. 59 | No. 12
DECEMBER 2018
Everyday Heroes
14 Mercy for a Thief
A man’s compassion changes a
juvenile’s life. JEN MCCAFFERY
VOICES & VIEWS

Department Of Wit
18 Beware of Mummy Dearest
P. | 26 You can’t choose your parents.
TWINKLE KHANNA
That's Outrageous!
22 When Air Becomes Death
READER FAVOURITES Air pollution—the new killer.
DR ARVIND KUMAR
10 Humour in Uniform
25 As Kids See It My First Job
30 It Happens Only in India

26 My Laboratory of Learning
A teenage TV anchor speaks.
34 Points to Ponder
AYAAN ALI BANGASH
40 Life’s Like That
49 Shocking Notes You Be The Judge
55 Laugh Lines 28 The Case of the
TOP L E F T: YO GE N S H A H, B OT TOM : I N DIAP I CT U R E

74 All in a Day’s Work Woman’s ‘Revenge’
The use and misuse of the anti-
96 Laughter, the Best Medicine
dowry law. NAOREM ANUJA
155 Brain Teasers
157 Word Power Finish This Sentence
REGULAR FEATURES 36 “The secret to a happy

life is ... ”
9 Dear Reader
12 Over to You
32 Good News
44 News from the World of Medicine
163 Studio
164 Quotable Quotes
P. | 36
Æ
4 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST
Vol. 59 | No. 12
DECEMBER 2018
WHO KNEW?
152 13 Things You Didn’t

Know About The
P. | 37 Common Cold
B R A N D O N S P E C K TO R
Me & My Shelf
159 Amitabha Bagchi’s
bilingual bookshelf
Entertainment
161 Our Top Picks of the Month
ART OF LIVING
P. | 161
37 The Fine Art Of Gifting
ISHANI NANDI
Health
42 6 Lifestyle Choices You Will
Feel In Your Bones
TINA DONVITO WITH Total number of pages in this issue of
BLESSY AUGUSTINE Reader’s Digest, including covers: 166
Food
46 A Hearty Feast
B L E S SY AU G U ST I N E
TO P L E F T: I N D I A P I C T U RE
Planet
50 Breathe Easy
B L E S SY AU G U ST I N E
Travel
52 Where To Go This
COVER IMAGES: INDIAPICTURE
Christmas BUSHRA AHMED COVER DESIGN: KESHAV KAPIL

VOL. 59 NO. 12
DECEMBER 2018
Editor Sanghamitra Chakraborty Editor-in-Chief Aroon Purie

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Dear Reader
My Very Calcutta Christmas
WHEN I THINK OF CHRISTMAS I think of
headier, simpler days. The exams are over, there
are no studies or homework, only new books for
the new school year. We’re on a high with the annual
concert, church fete and sports day in school just gone by.
Cousins from everywhere have turned up in Calcutta for
the holidays, and there are plans every single day: movies,
picnics, a magic show here, a circus there.
There were few parties then, only get-togethers, where
the elders were too busy to notice that we children were up
to no good. The one exception was the Christmas party in
school where Santa Claus came around with Secret Santa-type presents that
our parents had actually got for us. On Christmas day we went to Park Street
and New Market, lit up with fairy lights, stars and streamers (see p 52). Walking
into Flury’s cake shop was magical—I can smell the rich aroma of plum cake
P HOTO GR A P H BY A N A N D GO G OI , HAI R & MA KE - U P BY R OL IKA PR AKAS H
and the sweet fragrance of marzipan, as I write to you.

Everyone ate Christmas cake, but at home we had pulao and mutton, enjoyed
ourselves all day and went to bed late. My Malayalee friends had their own food,
as did my Punjabi, Gujarati, Parsi, Anglo–Indian and Chinese friends. They all
celebrated in their own way.
No one could tell us Christmas was not ours. No one ever said it was un-Indian
or anti-Hindu to celebrate it. No one stopped anyone from celebrating festivals
the way they liked, or eating foods of their choice or wearing the clothes they
wanted. To think that a highly accomplished musician would be called an anti-
national for blending traditional Carnatic music with Christian or Islamic threads
(as was the case with the Magsaysay-winning artiste T. M. Krishna), well into the
21st century, was preposterous. Because that is the India we grew up in and the
India that is ours—open, diverse, multicultural and all-embracing.
At Reader’s Digest we celebrate Christmas with the same spirit this month.
Read the special stories on p 37, p 46, p 70 and p 84, as well as our cover story
‘A Season of Miracles’ (p 56), which is guaranteed to bring a smile to your face
and a rush of warmth to your heart.
Let’s all celebrate the season, and Send an email to
the goodness in us! editor.india@rd.com

Humour in Uniform
“Three wise men radioed in to say the enemy can now see us.”
AT THE OUTPATIENT surgery centre Missouri, USA, and we often get calls
where I work, the anaesthesiologist meant for them. Like this one …
chats with patients before their opera- Caller: This is [military rank and
tions to help them relax. One day, he name]. I’m at the St Louis airport.
thought he recognized a woman as a When is someone going to pick me up?
co-worker from the army hospital Me: I’m sorry, you have the wrong
where he had trained. number.
When the patient confirmed that Caller: Isn’t this [phone number]?
his hunch was correct, the anaesthe- Me: Close, but we’re hundreds of
CARTOON BY BILL THOMAS
siologist said, “So tell me, is the food kilometres away from the airport.
there still as bad as it used to be?” Caller: (after a pause) So you don’t
“I suppose,” she replied. “I’m still know who’s going to pick me up?
notalwaysright.com
cooking it.” GCFL.net
Reader’s Digest will pay for your funny

OUR HOME NUMBER is very similar anecdote or photo in any of our humour
sections. Post it to the editorial address, or
to that of the army training centre in email: editor.india@rd.com

Over to You
FEEDBACK ON OUR OCTOBER ISSUE
WRITE
&
WIN!
THE DREADED A BALM FOR THE SOUL

CANCER As I turned the page to read
Today breast cancer is ‘Advice to a Boy Lonely in
an alarming disease as Montreal’, a strange familiarity
every other woman swept over me. As a recent
seems to be afflicted college graduate who sud-
by it [‘Lower Your Risk denly had to grow up, start
for Breast Cancer’]. working for a living, stay in a
Our fast-paced life- small flat crammed with six
style, juggling office and other people, after years of
household duties, per- having her own spacious
haps makes us prone to bedroom, I felt bewildered
the disease. However, this dreaded at how wonderfully the writer
disease can be prevented with self- C. Y. Gopinath had understood
examination, regular check-ups, ex- my situation. I remembered how,
ercise and proper work–life balance. as a teenager, nothing was more
ARVINDER KAUR, Mo h a l i , P u n j a b attractive than the idea of having
my own money and independence.
IN ROUGH WATERS But now that I did, all I wanted was
In ‘The Gift of Bad Times’, the to go home and wrap myself in the
author beautifully portrayed the comfort of my mother’s arms. Stung
myriad emotions playing on the by the lonely nights of emptiness I
mind of a person when the ride never stop thinking about how much
gets rough—rising anxiety, ebbing easier it was at home.
confidence, the question ‘why me’ The writer’s honesty was sobering,
are natural, as is the instinct to and his actionable advice, based on
remain morose and inactive. I have personal experiences, reassuring.
faced a similar predicament and Gopinath helped me realize the im-
can appreciate how pushing one- portance of staying open to expe-
self out of this state each day is riences that will help me grow and
half the battle won. The writer bring value to the life that I create
deftly unfolded the lessons of along the way. SUKRITI CHOPRA, D e l h i
gratitude, patience and resilience Sukriti Chopra gets this month’s
learnt in those bad times. ‘Write & Win’ prize of `1,000. —EDs
MANASI GUPTA, A g ra

A CLASSIC MESSAGE our son, and ourselves, a normal life.
Charlie Chaplin’s final speech from He died at age 25. The loss was
The Great Dictator (‘Fight for a World devastating, but we had a good run.
of Reason’) filled me with nostalgia The love for life and faith in the future
and wonder. As a teenager, in 1945, I helps one learn life’s lessons and ma-
watched it in an army cantonment in nage grief. JAGDISH CHANDER, Ja l a n d h a r
Western Punjab (now Pakistan). I had
enjoyed it simply as a comedy then. GIVING IS A SELFISH ACT
Now, at the age of 87, rewatching it, ‘The Festival Of Giving’ reminded us
I was filled with awe and wonder at of our beloved parents’ advice. “If you
the powerful message, all the more have two rupees in reserve and some-
relevant in today’s atmosphere of one in need requests for aid, 1) never
growing intolerance and conflict. say no; 2) don’t offer one rupee and
Despite spectacular technological keep the other for yourself; 3) give all
advancements, our lives are full of that you can. Remember: give the best
strife and struggle. As Chaplin said, to the world and the best will come
only we, the people, have the power back to you.”
to create happiness and make this life To this day, we look for opportuni-
free and beautiful. M. M. MATHUR, D e l h i ties to put this into practice. There is
also a selfish interest in this. Every
ARE WE THE REAL ANIMALS? time we succeed, the contentment we
Today, we believe that animals are en- experience is inexplicable.
croaching upon our space, that they SHALINI GERALD & FIONA WALTAIR, C h e n n a i
are life-threatening man-eaters and
cannot be trusted. The heartbreaking WHERE THERE IS A WILL ...
story ‘The Leopard’ by Ruskin Bond The rescue story of two young boys
makes us realize it is the other way from the perilous riptide on a Florida
round. It is we who are threatening beach [‘The Human Chain’] was
wildlife, destroying their habitats uplifting. The spontaneous and well-
and killing them. ABIRA SINHA, T h a n e coordinated effort by fellow beach-
goers to save the boys is a triumph of
A LIFE WELL-LIVED humanity. It shows that seemingly
‘Living With Loss’ struck a chord. Our insurmountable hurdles can be
nine-month-old son was diagnosed overcome through collective deter-
with a chronic disease, which, at that mination. K. NATARAJAN, Ma d u ra i
time, was not curable. The doctors told
us he would start losing physical abili- Write in at editor.india@rd.com. The
best letters discuss RD articles, offer
ties one by one and not live beyond criticism, share ideas. Do include your
10 years. Undeterred by this, we gave phone number and postal address.

EVERYDAY
HEROES
A bar owner’s determination to find a lost
wallet helps a young man change his life
Mercy for a Thief

BY J EN M CCA FF E RY
A FRANTIC CALL came into in the bar until she went to sit on
Jimmy Gilleece’s bar this past March. a bench outside and left when her
A newly married woman who had ride arrived. Within minutes, a
spent the afternoon at the dive young man in a hoodie approached
bar in Wrightsville Beach, North the bench, shoved something in
Carolina, USA, couldn’t find her his pocket and walked off. Gilleece
wallet. She didn’t care about her posted a clip on the bar’s Facebook
P HOTO GRA P H BY J I LL I A N C L A RK
ID, credit cards or $150 in cash—but page. “I didn’t want to crucify him,”
her wedding ring was tucked inside. he said. “I just asked if anybody
Gilleece, 42, didn’t like the idea knew who the guy was.”
that a theft could have occurred at Within hours, Gilleece got a text
his place, Jimmy’s at Red Dogs. from 17-year-old Rivers Prather,
So he set out to find the wallet. He who’d heard about the post from his
spent hours scouring footage from sister. Prather owned up to having
16 different surveillance cameras, taken the wallet and told Gilleece
watching the woman’s every step he’d done it because he hadn’t eaten

Rivers Prather (left),
with Jimmy Gilleece,
says, “I’d be sitting in
a cell right now if it
weren’t for Jimmy.”

MERCY FOR A THIEF
in two days. He said he saw the ring there the next day at noon. A crowd
but thought it was fake, so he took had gathered to watch the two divers
the money and threw the wallet off search in the strong current. More
the public docks into the ocean. than an hour passed, with no sign
Then he bought a sandwich. of the ring. Gilleece grew worried,
Gilleece, unsure whether he especially when the detective began
believed Prather, told the teen peppering Prather with questions,
to meet him at the docks. There, trying to get him to admit to keeping
they got to talking, and the ring. Each passing
Prather revealed that minute increased the
he wasn’t getting along chances that she would
with his family and Gilleece saw arrest the young man.
had been living in the Prather for And then a diver
woods for a week. popped up. In his
Gilleece, a father of what he was: hand was the wallet,
two with another on more of a and inside was the ring.
the way, took stock Cheers erupted from
of Prather—his small
kid than the spectators. Even the
stature, his ruddy a criminal. detective was happy.
cheeks—and saw When Gilleece called
him for what he was: the wallet’s owner,
more of a kid than a criminal. she burst into tears. She promptly
But the stakes were high. The dropped the felony charges against
police were already on the case, and Prather for stealing the ring, and
because of the missing ring, Prather he was permitted to go through a
could be facing felony charges. “He misdemeanour diversion programme
would be going to ‘big boy’ jail, all for the theft of the $150.
58 kilos of him,” Gilleece says. “I had But it wasn’t over for Gilleece. He’d
to help him somehow.” been troubled about Prather sleeping
Gilleece recruited two local divers in the cold woods. Gilleece knew his
to search the waters where Prather home was big enough to give Prather
had thrown the wallet. Meanwhile, a place to live for a while. He told the
the police had heard that Gilleece teen he could stay with his family
and Prather had spoken and wanted until the boy got on his feet again.
Gilleece to bring the teen down to the He also gave the kid a job at his bar.
station. Instead, Gilleece called the “Most people would have given
police and told them, “He’s going to the footage to police, and he chose
be at the docks with me tomorrow.” to help me,” Prather told CBS News.
A detective was waiting for them I say ‘thank you’ to him every day.”

VOICES VIEWS
Department of Wit
Beware Of Mummy Dearest
I L LU ST RAT I O N BY RA J U ; ( TW I N K L E K HA NNA) K ES HAV KAPI L

BY TWI N KL E K HA NN A F ROM M R S F U N N Y B O N E S
MY MOTHER HAS NEVER BEEN the Band-Aid

dispensing, cupcake-baking, checking-on-homework sort
of mother that one sees in commercials. She is funny,
sometimes wacky, a little eccentric and fallibly human,
and has consistently over the years found new and unique
ways to embarrass me, starting at birth when she decided
TWINKLE KHANNA that naming me Twinkle was a foolproof way of making
is a humorist, sure that I would get teased throughout my life, have
columnist, former immigration officers at various airports stare at my passport
actor and interior
designer. She has
and shake with hysterical laughter and strangers stalk me
authored three with WhatsApp messages like, “Twinkle, Twinkle, little star,
bestselling books. I hope you get hit by a car!”

Here is a short list of the things heading home. Every day Mother
that she has done to traumatize me goes shopping and as I see our tiny
at various stages. room filling up with shopping bags,
ZI am 13: I am studying at Panch- I start getting a feeling that this will
gani [in Maharashtra] and have been not end well. It is the last day, my
selected to play in the inter-school flight is at 8 p.m. and Mum’s flight
basketball match. Mother has come is four hours before mine. I start
to see the match, as it is a big fretting as to how she will fit all her
moment in my life. In stuff in her suitcase and
the middle of the she reassures me that I
match, she starts have nothing to worry
yelling from the stands, As I see our tiny about—to go to work
“Tina! Tina! You are the room filling up and she will pack
best!” and when I turn everything for me as
to hear where all this with Mum’s well before she leaves.
ruckus is coming from, shopping bags, That evening I rush
the ball is thrown my to my room to pick up
way, smacks me on the I get the feeling my bags, only to find
head and I fall down this won’t no suitcases, just two
flat on the court. trunks. Description of
end well. the above-mentioned
ZI am 18: Mother has trunks: Dented, bat-
read a book on some colour-therapy tered aluminium boxes with my
diet by Linda Clark, and decided that I name plastered across in massive
must follow this innovative weight-loss letters and misspelt ‘Twinkal Khana’
programme, which consists of eating with a bright red marker pen.
only red- and orange-coloured fruits, Mummy dearest has taken the
drinking solarized water in red bottles two suitcases I had come with, to
and sitting in front of an infrared light accommodate all the shopping, and
for 15 minutes every day. End result has packed all my things in the film
after two weeks: I have gained three unit’s costume department trunks.
pounds and have a burn mark on my
stomach from the infrared light ZI am 37: My mother decides to call
toppling and falling on me. my entire family over for dinner—
husband, in-laws, cousins and all—
ZI am 29: Mum and I are going to and then proceeds to talk about how
London for a shoot, and Mum is then fat I was as a child, how I got stuck in
going on to New York while I am a bucket while trying to have a bath,

B E WA R E O F M U M M Y D E A R E S T
how I used to eat mangoes sitting opportunity and is now persuading

on the potty and how she had to me to take advantage of her friend’s
buy clothes for a 14-year-old when generous offer.
I was just seven.
6 p.m.: Our much-awaited visitor
And then last week ... arrives. She is articulate, intelligent
8 a.m.: My phone rings. It is mother, and extremely charming. I am
and she says, “I saw your console in almost convinced that I must part
the foyer yesterday, it’s the first thing with most of my money, when I start
guests will see when they mentally doing some
enter your house and it is calculations and an
looking very empty. You alarm bell starts ringing.
need to buy an antique I protest that nothing in
statue and place it there the world can help you
immediately.” earn 125 per cent per
I need to nip this annum, especially when
potentially long the bank is just about
conversation in the giving 9 per cent. Every
bud quickly, so I reply, question I ask is met
“Granny is antique too, with vague answers
let’s make her sit on the like angel investors,
console whenever trading in yen, etc. till
guests come by.”
Granny is the meeting comes to
Mummy dearest antique too: an abrupt end.
hangs up without Let’s make her
a word. 8:30 p.m.: My mother
sit on the receives an SMS from
1:30 p.m.: Mother has console her friend, which
forgotten all about our states, “I am very
morning spat, and calls
whenever guests disappointed with
me in high spirits. She come by. your daughter’s
informs me that an old attitude. What does
acquaintance from she keep mumbling
Delhi is coming over this evening. percentages for? Does she even
The lady in question has been trying know what she is saying? Under
I N D I A P I C T U RE
to persuade mummy dearest to these conditions I take back my

partake in a great money-making kind offer of granting you a place
scheme, and mum has already in my scheme. It’s your loss.”
decided that it is a fabulous Mother starts berating me for

R E A D E R S D I G E S T. C O . I N
having spoilt this great prospect and A month later, mum calls me: “I
when I try explaining to her that this have been trying our Delhi friend’s
is just a money-making racket as the number but she hasn’t returned my
numbers don’t add up, she again calls. Really, you should have been
yells at me for behaving like I am nicer to her. Didn’t even serve her
“some kind of maths teacher”. Hurt biscuits properly with tea that day.
about the maths dig, I remind her But I agree with you, it’s better to be
that I had scored 97 out of 100 on safe than sorry. What is too good to
my board exam in the same subject. be true usually is ... Anyway, listen, I
She must remember that at least, got a letter from a nice Nigerian man
since she and my aunt had made who wants to give us some money ...”
fun of me saying, “The Human Before she can continue, I yell,
Calculator not only gets 97 marks “Oh my God!”
but also weighs 97 kilos.” She starts giggling and says,
She gets even more irked, so I “I am just joking.”
sneakily grab her phone and send I tell her, “It’s not funny, Mum,
her friend a message back: “CBI has and sometimes you really do make
just arrested MP Ramchandra and stupid mistakes.”
two ex-MLAs in a Ponzi scheme, She snorts, “That’s true, I made
would you like to join them?” you.’
TAKEN FROM MRS FUNNYBONES, COPYRIGHT © 2015 BY TWINKLE KHANNA.

EXCERPTED WITH PERMISSION FROM PENGUIN RANDOM HOUSE INDIA
WHEN NEWS ANCHORS GET A CASE OF THE PUNS
BREAKING NEWS: Scientists have discovered what may be

the world’s largest bedsheet. More on that as it unfolds.
@I M S OF RA NCIS
BREAKING NEWS: Overworked janitor sweeps the nation.

@K Y L EM U Z Y K A
BREAKING NEWS: My corduroy pillow has been making

headlines all week.
@S K U LLC AT

THAT’S OUTRAGEOUS!
A chest surgeon shares an alarming first-hand

account of this public health emergency
When Air Becomes Death

BY DR ( PR O F) ARV I ND KU M AR
THE PROCESS OF BREATHING STARTS at birth and

continues until death. We breathe around 25,000 times every
day, inhaling 10,000 or more litres of air every day. It is a basic
body function meant to sustain life. But today, breathing
kills: it takes the lives of approximately seven million people
prematurely every year globally. This is because of the
presence of pollutants in the air, which are poison for our
ARVIND KUMAR
body and seriously damage our health. Dr Maria Neira, the
is a thoracic World Health Organization’s air pollution director, has called
surgeon with a it “a global public health emergency”. Ninety-eight per cent
specialization in
robot-assisted
of India’s children breathe air that is inferior to the WHO
surgery, and standards. Nearly 25 per cent deaths in children under five
co-founder are directly or indirectly related to air pollution.
of Lung Care
Foundation. He is
As a chest surgeon, I have been operating on lungs for over
associated with 30 years and have noticed a drastic change in their colour.
All India Institute Normal, healthy lungs are supposed to be pink but it is a
of Medical
Sciences, New
rarity for me to see pink lungs today, even among teenagers.
Delhi; Sir Ganga The black deposits visible on the surface of lungs are a grim
Ram Hospital and reminder of the presence of poison in the air we are breathing.
Vallabh Bhai
The pollutants in the air are particulate matter (PM) and
I L LU ST RAT I O N : K E S HAV KA P I L
Patel Chest
Institute, among gaseous substances. PM is divided as per its size into PM10,
others. He is the PM2.5 or PM<1 (these are micron sizes, approximately one
recipient of the thirtieth the width of the average human hair). PM10 gets
Dr B. C. Roy
Eminent Medical trapped in our nose or windpipe and is exhaled through
Person of the Year coughing but PM2.5 and smaller sizes go down to the most
2014 award. peripheral part of our lungs and get deposited there. They
induce severe local reactions and release a large number of
chemicals that go into the blood and reach every organ in

Q Nervous system
Children: under-development of cognitive
abilities due to neuro-inflammation
How Air Pollution All ages: neuro-inflammation and 5–10 times
higher incidence of brain attacks (paralysis)
Makes Us Sick
The worst affected are QEyes: redness, irritation, watering, infections
children, elderly and
QNose: irritation, allergies, sinusitis
pregnant women.
QThroat: soreness, infections
Children:
Under-development QCardiovascular system:
of lungs and brain, Children: premature hypertension
pneumonia, cancers All ages: hypertension, 5–10 times higher
and premature deaths incidence of heart attacks
Pregnant women:
QRespiratory system
Congenital defects,
Children: under-development of lung capacity
low birth-weight babies,
All ages: cough, difficulty in breathing, chest
death of child during pain and tightness, asthma, chest infections,
pregnancy, premature pneumonia, chronic bronchitis (or chronic
labour, problems after obstructive pulmonary disease), lung cancer
birth (carbon particles
have been demonstrated QReproductive system: Adverse impact
to be present in the on reproductive systems including

placenta) low sperm counts
the body through blood circulation, plants and dust from construction
causing damage on a long-term basis. sites and roadsides.
The gaseous matter in the air consists The problem of air pollution is
of carbon monoxide (CO), oxides of affecting the whole country, particu-
sulphur and nitrogen (SO2 and NO2), larly the northern states. Although
organic compounds, hydrocarbons, Delhi has been maximally in the news,
ozone and other substances, many essentially because of regular air-qual-
of which are proven cancer-causing ity monitoring. According to the WHO,
agents. Like PM, these also enter 14 of the world’s 20 most-polluted
through the lungs, get absorbed into cities are Indian, where air pollution
our blood and cause damage through- is adversely impacting the brain and
out the body. lung development of our children and
The key documented sources of air causing millions of premature deaths.
pollution are burning fossil fuels, au- As a chest surgeon, who sees the
tomobile exhaust, burning of garbage health impact (see box) of air pollu-
and landfills, and all smoke-emitting tion with his own eyes every day, this
industries, especially coal-fired power is nothing short of alarming.

W H E N A I R B E C O M E S D E AT H
However, this problem has not are smoke and dust. Thus, anything
received the kind of response that that produces smoke and causes
it merited from the government dust to be added to air is a cause of
and political parties: The ruling and pollution, and its rectification is the
opposition parties are busy blaming solution to the problem. People are
each other. While various corrective often looking for a quick-fix solution
measures are being taken by the to rectify the problem overnight, but
government, they are not proportion- unfortunately there is none.
ate to the enormity of the problem we Burning of fossil fuels, along with
face. There are various laws and rules garbage, remains the biggest source
in place, but they are openly flouted of smoke today, and a rapid decline in
by ‘civil society’. The ground reality, its use and shift to cleaner, renewable
sadly, is, continuous aggravation of sources of energy are the long-term
the situation, year after year, with no answers to this national malady.
improvement in sight. This means an en masse
shift to public modes of
WHAT IS TO transportation in order to
BE DONE? 98% of India’s check vehicular emissions
Does wearing a mask children breathe in our cities, and signi-
help? Ordinary masks ficant reduction in the
made of cloth, etcet-
poor quality air. amount of municipal
era, do not help. N95- 25% deaths in waste we generate and
or N99-grade mask children under 5 better disposal of that
works if worn snugly waste. These changes will
around the nose and are due to bad air. be resisted by the people
mouth. It traps most at first, as they would
of the PM, although require a major shift in
gases still go through. However, it gives our lifestyles. However, the problem
protection only as long as it is worn of air pollution has reached menacing
and has other practical challenges: levels. No matter how difficult the
Patients complain of feeling suffocated actions required to contain air pollu-
when these are worn for a long time tion are, the cost of inaction will be
as a result of rebreathing exhaled car- disease, disability and death—too
bon dioxide. Thus, while it may serve high a price to pay for something that
as protection for shorter periods, it is is still in our hands and can be fixed
definitely not a solution. by our collective efforts.
The real solution lies in identifying The time to act was yesterday, but
the root cause and fixing the problem it is still not late. I appeal that we start
at the source. The sources essentially right away.

As Kids See It
“I forgot my phone. Now how am I supposed to share

this significant childhood moment with my network?”
MY SIX-YEAR-OLD grandson was “Mountains,” she replied, “The

startled to learn that human beings Hima-Leelas.”
evolved from monkeys. But his SUVASINI SRIDHARAN, H y d e ra b a d
concept of evolution became clear
to us only when he saw a group of OUR SIX-YEAR-OLD does a lot of
S U SA N C A M I L L E RI KON A R
monkeys and quipped, “These trash talking for someone who puts
monkeys are yet to become human his shoes on the wrong feet 30 per
beings.” J. PADMANABHAN, B e n g a l u r u cent of the time. @DAD_IN_BRIEF
MY TODDLER, LEELA, was scrib- Reader’s Digest will pay for your funny
anecdote or photo in any of our humour
bling away intently. sections. Post it to the editorial address,
I asked, “What are you drawing?” or email: editor.india@rd.com

MY FIRST JOB
The seventh generation in a family of classical musicians, the

scion of the Senia Bangash Gharana had to unlearn years of
training for Bollywood
My Lab of Learning
BY AYAA N AL I BA NG AS H
AS TOLD TO MANNU KOHLI
MUSIC HAS BEEN MY LIFE since to travel to Mumbai for a shoot. That’s
the day I was born. To me, a job is when we shot the first promo of the
paid work that may mean stepping out show in March 2000. He then matter-
of your comfort zone and for which of-factly asked, “Are you OK hosting
you are accountable. I came closest the show?” It was as unceremonious
to having one in the years 1999–2000 as that and the magnitude of it didn’t
when I was asked to appear as a judge hit me until much later.
and then offered to host the television By then, Sa Re Ga Ma had a cult
programme Sa Re Ga Ma (later following, so at 19—still a teenager
known as Sa Re Ga Ma Pa). Producer– and barely an adult—it was a big
director Gajendra Singh offered the break for me.
job to my brother Amaan and I. At a Hosting the show was a giant
time when the television industry had responsibility and full of challenges
not yet gone through its boom and the because I hadn’t grown up in a filmi
culture of reality TV hadn’t yet seeped music environment. We were focused
into our lives, Sa Re Ga Ma instantly on classical music and introduced
became a huge hit. When the last to Bollywood songs in senior school
season was being filmed with singer through friends.
Sonu Nigam as the host in 1999 in In the show, each episode opened
Indore, Amaan bhai and I were invited with the host singing. While I sang as
on the show as judges. That was part of my training, I am essentially
perhaps Gajendraji’s way of observing an instrumentalist. I requested the
us through the camera lens for screen producers to modify the opening
presence, even though he never said sequence for 12 of the 24 episodes in
it. Soon after, he called and asked us the season, so at least half of them

began with us playing film songs on
the sarod instead of singing them.
This was an opportunity to show
the connection between Indian
classical music and film songs.
The first day of the shoot was
not easy either. I was used to being
in front of the camera, having
performed publicly since a young
age, but here they had five cameras,
which took some getting used to.
But the biggest challenge for me
was speaking chaste Hindi. This was
before the time of teleprompters,
hence one had to memorize the
script. I had grown up speaking
English and Hindustani, so the
dialect of the undiluted form took
some work. I started reading Hindi
novels and newspapers to get
comfortable with the language and
expand my vocabulary.
We ended up doing three seasons
and the experience made me evolve
as a person. I was used to public
attention but I got to see the other
side of success through the rejection
the participants faced. One of them Ayaan Ali
passed out due to shock when the poses for
the
results were announced and she
cameras.
found out she had lost. Besides
the buzzing excitement, I saw a
lot of heartbreak on set, which TV, the number of shows went up and
was humbling. our fan base broadened, with the film
I also came to understand the music audience coming to our classi-
power of television. We were called cal concerts. People who listened to
YO GE N S H A H
the “Sa Re Ga Ma boys”. We had ‘Satyam Shivam Sundaram’ were now

been already travelling the world coming to hear Raga Yaman. It was
for classical performances but post rewarding all the way.

YOU BE THE JUDGE
Misuse of the anti-dowry law versus a

woman’s legitimate right to live with dignity
The Case of the

Woman’s ‘Revenge’
RAJESH AND SNEHA, from Delhi and cruelty by a husband or his rela-
and Jaunpur respectively, met on a tives against a woman, with unlawful
matrimonial website and were mar- demands of dowry; and Section 323
ried on 28 November 2012. Despite IPC, that deals with punishment for
the existing laws in India against causing voluntary hurt. The sessions
dowry, their marriage—like many court in Jaunpur found Rajesh guilty
others in India—was solemnized and summoned him on 14 July 2014.
under its shadow. Sneha’s father had Sneha filed a revision petition to
given in to illicit demands from the include her in-laws—Rajesh’s parents
I LLU ST R AT I ON BY K E S H AV KA P I L
groom’s family, but they allegedly and his siblings, who lived in the
wanted more—`3,00,000 and a car— same house—in the case. On 3 July
which the small flour-mill owner 2015, her petition was accepted by the
hadn’t been able to arrange. Jaunpur sessions court and the trial
Unable to withstand the fallout— court was directed to take a fresh de-
daily torture—Sneha filed a complaint cision. Rajesh’s parents and siblings
against her husband in December were called to court on 18 August.
2013 under Section 498A of the Indian Rajesh and his parents approached
Penal Code (IPC)—for harassment the Allahabad High Court against the

summons. The matter was referred to abuse of Section 498A to settle scores
the mediation centre, but the process on the basis of exaggerated allegations,
broke down. Thereafter, the court cited without verifiable evidence of physical
that it found no cause to interfere with or mental injury. The petition stated
the order and dismissed the petition. that Sneha had left the matrimonial
Rajesh and family then moved the home on her own volition, and that
Supreme Court. Their main conten- Rajesh’s father, a retired government
tion: to check the tendency to level servant, his housewife mother, and his
allegations against all family members unmarried siblings had no interest in
to settle a matrimonial dispute and the demanding any dowry.
THE VERDICT
On 27 July 2017, a two-judge bench of the Supreme Court, comprising Justices
A. K. Goel and Uday Umesh Lalit, observed: “Section 498A was inserted in the
statute with the laudable object of punishing cruelty at the hands of husband or
his relatives against a wife, particularly when such cruelty had potential to result
in suicide or murder of a woman …” The bench cited statistics from the National
Crime Records Bureau, “… the rate of chargesheet filing for the year 2012 was
at … 93.6% while conviction rate was at … 14.4% only … The conviction rate of
cases registered under Section 498A IPC was also staggeringly low at 15.6%”.
And so, directions were issued to change the existing clauses, making an excep-
tion only for “the offences involving tangible physical injuries or death”.
The bench ruled: “Arrest of a relative other than husband could only be after
permission from the concerned magistrate. There should be no arrest of rela-
tives aged above 70 years. Power of the police to straight away arrest must be
prohibited. While granting permission, the court must ascertain that there is
prima facie material of the accused having done some overt and covert act.
The offence should be made compoundable and bailable. The role of each
accused must be specified in the complaint and the complaint must be
accompanied by a signed affidavit …”
The bench was of the opinion that most of such complaints were filed in
the “heat of the moment over trivial issues” and therefore “ … uncalled for
arrest may ruin the chances of settlement”.
In dowry-related cases, should the effect and purpose of the law be reflected
upon in light of the context it has been framed in? Why is it that when women
invoke laws that have been put in place to protect their rights, they are trivialized
and cast as women seeking revenge? Was the judgement fair? You be the judge.
Sound off at editor.india@rd.com

IT HAPPENS
Only in India
WE COULD ALL DO with a bit of course of law is followed in the Pot-

magic in our lives. The National terverse. To be eligible for this elec-
University of Juridical Sciences, tive course, open to the fourth- and
Kolkata, agrees, and how! To give a fifth-year students, one must have
breather to students, the institute is read all the Potter books. The catch:
planning to offer lessons on law and only 40 seats are available.
jurisprudence … in the fictional We, for one, are all for this idea.
world of Harry Potter. The course, We also demand that the course de-
RA J U E P UR I
starting this December, aims to signers create new spells and wands
improve critical thinking in students that can be used to ensure rule of law
through debates on whether the due in the country. Source: The Times of India

SPEAKING OF MAGIC, the ruling BJP of Liladhar Vaghela, a BJP MP from
in Madhya Pradesh hopes to cast a Gujarat. As he went out for a stroll,
spell on voters by roping in magicians rotis in hand, to feed the stray cows
to help them in their election cam- outside his home in Gandhinagar,
paign. Yes, you heard that right: magi- one of them didn’t take too kindly to
cians! Public speeches or good-ol’ his charity. The bovine gored him,
door-to-door campaigning are passé. which resulted in two broken ribs and
Magicians will highlight the current blood clots in the head, and a long
government’s achievements in com- stay in the hospital for the 83-year-old
parison to the previous government’s politician. Soon after the attack, a
“mismanagement”. No doubt, the en- drive to remove stray cattle from the
tertainment quotient will be high. city intensified. Bovine intervention?
Fighting a 15-year-old anti-incum- Source: The Times of India
bency factor, the BJP wants to invest

in this move to transform its electoral AS AN INDIAN, chances are you will
fortunes—magically. Source: indiatoday.in have eaten paan at some point in your
life. But it’s not every day that you can
SANTA CLAUS MAY be generous boast of having a paan worth `5,000.
with his Christmas gifts, but even Believe it or not, the nearly 50-year-
he will have trouble matching the old Tara Pan Centre in Aurangabad
‘charity’ of this Indian diamond offers paans priced between `5 and
merchant. In the run-up to Diwali, `5,000. The pricey paan, which is
PM Narendra Modi helped Savji evidently available only to couples,
Dholakia hand over hundreds of boasts colourful packaging and three
cars to the employees of Hari Krishna compartments—comprising a ‘male’
Exporters. And this was not the only and a ‘female’ paan, two versions for
highlight of this event. While 600 men and women, and a bottle of attar.
employees of the company received In both cases, there’s a ‘secret ingredi-
cars (totalling over $2 million) ent’ known only to the vendor. Both
manufactured by Maruti Suzuki, a also contain different aphrodisiacs for
thousand staff members were offered the two sexes, the effects of which can
gifts of cash deposits and apartments last up to two days. We are hoping to
in a huge outdoor ceremony in Surat, meet some satisfied customers.
Gujarat, as a reward for their loyalty. Source: The Times of India
It was a happy Diwali, indeed. —COMPILED BY SAPTAK CHOUDHURY
Source: Reuters
Reader’s Digest will pay for contributions
to this column. Post your suggestions
HE LOVED THE COWS but they with the source to the editorial address,
didn’t love him back. This is the story or email: editor.india@rd.com.

SOME POSITIVE STORIES THAT CAME OUR WAY
Good News
BY SA PTAK C HO U DHU RY
Fighting hunger
FOOD SECURITY A food bank
in Allahabad, now Prayagraj,
is helping villagers beat hun-
ger, and how! The bank allows
them to take grains on loan,
accepting a small donation of
grains as repayment. The idea
came from Sunit Singh, a pro-
fessor at the G. B. Pant Insti-
tute of Social Sciences at Jhusi. Karthyayani Amma (left) at the state literacy exam
He pitched the concept to a
self-help group run by the NGO Never too late to learn
Pragati Vahini Federation. According EDUCATION They say age is just a
to Singh, anyone can become a mem- number—and 96-year-old Karthyayani
ber by donating a kilogramme of rice. Amma from Cheppad, in Kerala’s
In times of need, the villagers can bor- Alappuzha district, has proven just
row five kilogrammes, to be returned that. Once a cleaner at local temples
within 15 days. Currently, the bank and nearby households, Karthyayani
serves around 20 villages in the dis- Amma was the oldest candidate to
trict, and can be a lifesaver for the take the state literacy exam this year.
300-odd families there. Singh plans She aced the exam, scoring 98 out of
PHOTO COURTESY: THE NEWS MINUTE
to expand this initiative and hopes to 100, only regretting that she missed
make the district hunger-free one day. out on two marks. Her efforts earned
“I wasn’t doing this for an award—it was just

something I wanted to do.”
Pa ige Hu n ter , a B r i t i s h t e e n a g e r w h o s e u p l i f t i n g m e s s ag e s , att a c h e d t o a b r i d g e t o
p r e v e n t s u i c i d e l e a p s , h a v e b e e n c r e d i t e d b y p ol i c e a s h e l p i n g t o s av e s i x l i v e s .

her an audience with Chief Minister
Pinarayi Vijayan and she was even
HEROES
gifted a laptop by Kerala’s minister
SACKO SAVES THE DAY
of education C. Ravindranath.
But Amma isn’t stopping there—
SWEDEN’S ARMED FORCES
she now wants to improve her English came under attack recently for its
and learn more about computers. We spending on dog training, but few
have no doubt she will ace it all! can doubt our four-legged friends’
ability to help out humans when
A helping hand needed. Meet German shepherd
SOCIETY Amidst the troubling revela- dog Sacko (pictured), hailed a
tions of India’s #MeToo movement, a “hero” by his handler after sniffing
out an injured man who went miss-
noble initiative is providing invaluable
ing in a forest.
support. In response to requests for Police in Sweden’s Dalarna
help, several lawyers, therapists, coun- province spent five hours searching
sellors, activists, support groups and for the elderly man, who had failed
NGOs have come forward to offer pro to return from his daily walk. Then
bono advice and services to survivors. they called in Sacko—who took half
A crowdsourced list has been an hour to find a scent and locate
compiled and made public by the the pensioner.
#IWillGoOut collective for those
seeking help. Currently, the list has
a resource base of 400 individuals
and organizations from India and
abroad. Amidst the allegations and
counterclaims, such a practical step
is indeed welcome.
Green parking spaces

ENVIRONMENT A pilot scheme in
the Amsterdam suburb of Segbroek “We found the man on the ground,
is offering residents the chance to able to talk but freezing and injured,”
turn their private parking space says officer Anders Sjöberg. In return
into a bit of greenery—such as a for his efforts, Sacko wanted just
sun terrace or play space for kids. one thing: “He gets his ball after-
In return, participating residents’ wards, and that’s the best thing
in his world—better even than a
vehicles are stored for free in a car
sausage,” says Sjöberg.
park. The long-term aim is to en-
courage people to use carpools.
Sources: Food Security—The Times of India, 18.9.18. Education—The Indian Express, 1.11.18. Society—The News Minute, 8.10.18.
Environment—The Guardian, 17.5.18. Heroes—The Local (Sweden), 9.7.18
Points to Ponder
Saving our planet, lifting people
out of poverty, advancing
economic growth ... these are
one and the same fight. We must
connect the dots between
climate change, water scarcity,
energy shortages, global health,
food security and women’s
empowerment. Solutions to one
problem must be solutions for all.
BAN KI-MOON,
f o r m e r s e c r e t a r y - g e n e ra l o f t h e Un i t e d Na t i o n s
I HAVE AN IDEA that the only thing THIS WORLD IS FULL of conflicts
which makes it possible to regard this and full of things that cannot be
world we live in without disgust is the reconciled but there are moments
beauty which now and then men when we can transcend the dualistic
create out of the chaos. The pictures system and reconcile and embrace
they paint, the music they compose, the whole mess, and that’s what I
the books they write and the lives mean by Hallelujah. That regardless
they lead. Of all these the richest in of what the impossibility of the situa-
beauty is the beautiful life. That is tion is, there is a moment when you
the perfect work of art. open your mouth and you throw
open your arms and you embrace the
W. SOMERSET MAUGHAM, thing and you just say, “Hallelujah!
n o v e l i s t , p l a y w r i g h t a n d s h o r t-s t o r y w r i t e r Blessed is the name.” And you can’t
reconcile it in any other way except
WE TRAVEL, some of us forever, to seek in that position of total surrender,
I N DI A P I C T U R E
other states, other lives, other souls. total affirmation.
ANAÏS NIN, LEONARD COHEN,

essayist and novelist s i n g e r, p o e t a n d n o v e l i s t

AS A WOMAN, it distresses me when I GENOCIDE IS NOT just a murderous
see how women are treated as incon- madness; it is, more deeply, a politics
sequential. It angers me when I see that promises a utopia beyond poli-
how women are either slut-shamed or tics—one people, one land, one truth,
mockingly dismissed when they raise the end of difference. Since genocide is
their voice to proclaim their discomfort a form of political utopia, it remains an
at unprofessional behaviour or to out enduring temptation in any multi-eth-
a sexual predator. As a writer, I try and nic and multicultural society in crisis.
analyse the sequence of events to
understand what happened and what MICHAEL IGNATIEFF,
could have been done to prevent it. I a u t h o r, a c a d e m i c a n d f o r m e r p o l i t i c i a n
must confess that largely I don’t think
anything would have made much of ONE CANNOT EXPECT positive results
a difference. The sense of male entitle- from an educational or political action
ment is such that it overrides female programme which fails to respect the
consent with ‘She really means yes even particular view of the world held by the
though she is saying no. She just needs people. Such a programme constitutes
to be persuaded. And I know I can.’ cultural invasion, good intentions
notwithstanding.
ANITA NAIR,
writer
PAULO FREIRE,
educator and philosopher
MY STORIES, MY FAMILY’S STORIES
were not stories in India. They were
just life. WHEN RADIUM WAS discovered, no
When I left and made new friends one knew that it would prove useful
in a new country, only then did the in hospitals. The work was one of
things that happened to my family, pure science. And this is a proof that
the things we had done become scientific work must not be considered
stories. Stories worth telling, stories from the point of view of the direct
worth writing down. usefulness of it.
I was born in south India, in a
town called Khazipet in the state of MARIE CURIE,
Andhra Pradesh. p hy s i c i s t a n d c h e m i s t
I was born into a lower-middle-class

family. My parents were lecturers. OUR HEARTS ARE drunk with a beauty
I was born an untouchable. our eyes could never see.
SUJATHA GIDLA, GEORGE W. RUSSELL,

writer and NYC subway conductor writer and poet

FINISH THIS SENTENCE
The secret to a
happy life is …
… having a few good
… spreading
friends and good cheer
lots of good to those far and near.
DR PRADEEP SAHAY,
books. Pachamb a , Jharkhand
D_INFINITIST,
via Instag ram
… a short
memory.
RACHNA DIKSHIT,
Gurgaon
… to be able
to share my
adventures with my
grandchildren and
… home-made
see the bread. … in your
sparkle in
DR SUVAJEET DUTTAGUPTA,
Mumb ai
own hands.
FLORENCE THAPA,
their eyes. Kohima
SWATI KHATRI,
New D elhi
… letting go
of things that make you unhappy.
AVANTI AVINASH PATHAK, Pune
… accept, and
don’t expect! … forgive, forget and love

SANGEETA GULATEE unconditionally.
MANOCHA, LEELA MURALIDHARAN,
B engaluru Mumb ai

ART of LIVING
The Fine Art of

GIFTING
A primer on how to give
the perfect present
BY I SH AN I NA N DI
I N DI AP IC TUR E
ALAMY

THE FINE ART OF GIFTING
I LOVE THIS TIME OF YEAR, thing a person would not usually con-
I thought to myself, looking around sider for themselves; a gift that would
my apartment, scrubbed clean and encourage them to try new things. A
festooned with holiday décor. I sighed cookbook for your foodie partner who
in contentment, triumph and a bit of usually has his head buried in work or
disbelief—all this in just two weeks. art supplies for a colleague who loves
Including gifts! I was pretty sure I doodling during conference calls are
had something for everyone, even good examples—unexpected gifts that
Meenakshi auntie’s brother-in-law’s have little to do with their everyday
nephew who works in IT. (Of course avatars but add meaning to their lives.
he’ll like it! Who doesn’t need anti-bac- QMIND OVER MATTER A lot of
terial wipes?) By the end of the night, presents end up adding to household
though, I was less enthused about my clutter. You may even run the risk of
choices. Reactions to my gifts pretty duplicating a gift. Instead, the chance
much ranged from a tepid “Ohhh … to experience something makes for a
nice,” to the exaggerated (and patently unique, out-of-the-box gift idea that
false), “Ohhh!! Niiiccee … !!” and finally will be memorable and cannot be
the pithy (and devastating), “Oh.” replicated. Help the person you have
Clearly I had to do better. After some in mind get out of the everyday rigma-
research and a lot of asking around, I role of work and home by gifting them
learnt that the art of gifting involves just experiences. What about getting them
as much logic and science, as creativity tickets to special shows in the city,
and detection skills. With the festive sea- signing them up for a class they always
son drawing near, here’s what I discov- wanted to try out but never committed
ered about giving meaningful gifts. to or buying them an online subscrip-
QHEAR, HEAR “I desperately need tion in keeping with their interests?
a spa day!” your roommate says over QPLAY IT SAFE Let’s say you adore
drinks. Listen closely—you will pick the fragrance of lemongrass, and pick
up the signals for an ideal gift. Whether up an aromatherapy gift pack for a
it’s a day at the spa, a pot of anti-age- colleague. Great idea … until you find
ing cream or a box set of their favou- out she associates the smell with floor
rite books, you’ll zero in on the gift cleaners. It is entirely possible that a
that would mean the world to them. good gifting idea will backfire. So steer
Giving someone exactly what they clear of those involving personal tastes
need will not only make their day but and associations, such as fragrances,
it’ll make them feel extra special to items with specific messages or
know that you paid attention to them. slogans, clothing and accessories.
QSPRING A SURPRISE Who doesn’t Another safe bet? Gift cards! While
like a good surprise? Consider some- cold hard cash is avoidable, a gift

card (from an online shopping portal
with multiple options or a specific
shop or a brand you know the person
prefers) are great neutral gifts that
allow the freedom of choice.
QCELEBRATE PEOPLE Everyone
needs a pick-me-up and the holidays
offer a brilliant chance to make a loved
one feel extra special. Finding ways
to make someone feel recognized and
valued for their accomplishments, work (stationery, organizers, journals),
or for no reason at all, is a great idea. for tech needs (power banks, head-
Whether it’s a successful relationship, phones, quirky USBs, mousepads)
a new house, closing a deal, adopting or for novelty (bobbleheads, board-
a pet, having a baby, a promotion … let games, fun T-shirts) are all interesting
their victories guide your choice of gift. things to add to the present pile.
QBE SENSIBLE A meaningful gift QREGIFT RESPONSIBLY From oddly
draws far more value from what it shaped plateware in brightly coloured
is than how much it costs. Invest a geometric shapes to citrus-themed
bit of time and effort in planning while sweaters that say “Orange you glad I
sticking to a reasonable price limit. got you this sweater?”, we all end up
This is particularly true while buying with gifts that are duds. First ask your-
a gift as a group (personal or profe- self, is it regiftable or just recyclable?
ssional). Keeping to a moderate budget If it’s good enough to pass on, ponder
also ensures the giftee does not feel over who it should be for. If the item
pressured to match up when it’s their has no connection to a person’s style,
turn to give. An added point about gifts sense of humour or taste, you are sim-
at the workplace—check your office ply perpetuating the same problem
policy on gifts and ensure it is accept- you had. Also, do not linger over the
able to give and receive items to keep decision—my friend once ended up
things above board. regifting a horrendous vase she got
QGOING NEUTRAL Most of these from her neighbour back to her!
I N DI A P I C T U RE
ideas only work if you know the per- Q PACKAGE WITH CARE How you
son fairly well. But gifting a person present a gift adds value to the gift
you barely know can be confusing! itself and shows effort and care.
You can’t go wrong with a gift that is Creative gift-wrapping techniques
basic, gender-neutral and useful to or a note explaining why you chose
anyone. Gifts for the house (posters, that gift for them will add soul to your
coasters, coffee mugs, bookends), for purchase and make it memorable.

Life’s Like That
“You keep giving me advice when what I need is herbal tea and lemon bars.”
LOOKING FOR A REASON to I know it is because Harry Potter’s

chuckle? Three people share their birthday is 31 July.
wry stories: Q Today, I was at the doctor’s office.
Q “Today, I met a girl named Unique,” Because I’m a teenager, I was
CARTOON BY PHIL WITTE
I said. “She has an identical twin required to take a survey about

sister.” No one thought it was funny. drugs, alcohol and sex. It asked
Q Today in Latin, my teacher was whether I was in a gang. I wrote
trying to figure out how many days “marching band”.` mylifeisaverage.com
were in July. I said 31. He asked

whether I knew it from a rhyme or ON THE PHONE with my 93-year-old
something. I said yes. The real reason brother in Wisconsin, USA, and I told

him I thought it was time he paid Instead, the doctor prescribed
someone to shovel snow for him. bottled water and electrolytes,
He suddenly grew indignant “which have simple sugars
and demanded, “Why should I and salt”.
pay someone to shovel?” My daughter liked that. “Oh,”
And added, “I can get my son to she said, “like a margarita?”
do it. He’s only 70!” DAVID GROESCHEL KAARYN ROBERTS
DURING AN OPEN SESSION of MY THREE-YEAR-OLD SON:

the All India Congress Committee I don’t know what I want to be
in Meerut, in 1946, I was sitting in when I grow up.
the pandal with my cousin and Me: You can be anything you want.
listening to the speeches of the Son: (after a few seconds) I think
party delegates. I’ll be a mother. MARY LAHL
All of a sudden, the person sitting
next to us lit up a cigarette. Right ALL I’M SAYING IS, if we had a
beside us, on a wooden pole, hung dungeon, my wife would decorate
a sign that read ‘NO SMOKING’. Our it with throw pillows.
neighbour, blissfully unaware of @THEBOYDP (BOYD’S BACKYARD™)
this, puffed away.
Outraged, a young volunteer, SCENE: A public bus in New York
pointing to the sign, requested him City, USA
to stop smoking. Bus Driver: “Everyone remember to
The smoker promptly pointed keep your headphones plugged in.
towards the stage and retorted, “You From the looks of all of you, I can
stop the leader on the stage who is already tell I hate your music taste.”
smoking and I will stop too.” instagram.com/overheardnewyork
This was beyond the volunteer’s

power. The person smoking on stage SIGNS DONE RIGHT:
was none other than the Congress Q Warning! Children left unattended
leader Maulana Azad! The matter will be sold to the circus.
rested there. S. K. RASTOGI, Ne w D e l h i Q Wanted! Customers ...
[The contributor, 92 years old, recalls this No experience necessary, apply
incident from his youth.]
within. DEVIKA AGARWAL, Lu c kn o w
BEFORE HEADING OFF to Mexico

Reader’s Digest will pay for your funny
on vacation, my daughter asked her anecdote or photo in any of our humour
doctor for medicine to ward off any sections. Post it to the editorial address,
potential stomach troubles. or email: editor.india@rd.com

HEALTH
Surprising reasons your risk of developing

osteoporosis rises—and how to reduce it
6 Lifestyle Choices You

Will Feel In Your Bones
BY T I NA D ONVI TO WI T H B LE SSY AU G UST I NE
YOU SPEND TOO LITTLE subjected to loading, it will waste

1 TIME ON THE MOVE away.” The solution? Weight-bearing
“Bone is a living tissue,” says Jonathan exercise—even just walking. Strength
Lee, MD, an attending physician of training counts too.
orthopaedics at Montefiore Health
System in New York City. “The more YOU EAT SALTY SNACKS
you use it, the more it will adapt 2 A study from Japan showed
and strengthen. Likewise, if it is not that postmenopausal women who

had high sodium intakes were more consumption can lower oestrogen
than four times as likely to have a levels, and this can also lead to osteo-
fracture as those with low sodium in- porosis”, Lee says. “To top it all off,
takes. That’s because as the kidneys alcohol is directly toxic to osteoblasts,
excrete the sodium, calcium is the cells that become bone cells.”
drained from the bloodstream.
YOU’RE LOSING LOTS
YOU SHUN SUNLIGHT 5 OF WEIGHT
3 “Vitamin D is important for Losing too much weight can harm
bones to absorb calcium. If you are your bones. A body mass index (BMI)
deficient, your bones will get thinner of less than 18.5 is considered a risk
and weaker, causing microfractures factor for osteoporosis. According to a
and osteoporosis,” says Yash Gulati, study by the Harvard School of Public
orthopaedic surgeon at Indraprastha Health, just a one-unit increase in
Apollo Hospitals, New Delhi. Getting BMI (about two to three kg) reduced
20–30 minutes of exposure to sunlight the risk of bone loss by 12 per cent.
in the morning or early evening Lee points out that “those who are
remains the best source for vitamin D. underweight might be suffering from
“This is especially important for malnutrition, which could contribute
growing children, who tend to spend to osteoporosis”.
an inordinate amount of time playing
indoors these days,” says Gulati. YOU BREATHE DIRTY AIR
Another good source is fish that has 6 In a study published in the
been cooked with the bone and forti- Lancet Planetary Health, researchers
ILLUSTRATION BY JOSÉ DE LA ROSA; SHUTTERSTOCK (6)
fied dairy products and oils. crunched hospital admission data for
9.2 million people, who were covered
YOU UNWIND WITH WINE by Medicare health insurance in the
4 Low levels of alcohol consump- US, between 2003 and 2010. They
tion may be good for your bones, found that even a small increase in the
according to a study from Oregon levels of ambient particulate matter in
State University, USA, but more than the air led to an increase in bone frac-
a couple of drinks a day has the oppo- tures and osteoporosis in older adults.
site effect. “Too much alcohol can Gulati thinks that these are the fin-
make it harder for the gastrointestinal dings of one study, and hence incon-
tract to absorb calcium,” says Lee. clusive. “But we have to take serious
Alcohol can also increase cortisol note of it. Air pollution is not good for
levels, which can lead to lower bone your general well-being, and it’s possi-
mineral density. Furthermore, “in ble that it may have adverse effects on
women, in particular, higher alcohol bone health as well,” he says.

NEWS FROM THE
World of Medicine
Early diners are healthier
A study of more than 4,000 men and
women in Spain found that people
who ate their evening meal before
9 p.m. or at least two hours before
going to bed had a 20 per cent lower
risk of breast or prostate cancer than
those who ate after 10 p.m. or went
to bed soon after eating. These can-
cers may be bolstered by disruptions
to the biological clock as meal timing
impacts sleep cycles. More research
needs to be done to confirm the
link, but it’s worth noting that
studies have already shown
that eating dinner earlier can
help you maintain a healthy
weight and sleep better.
of five grams by far. Results of the
Too much salt among study were published in the Journal
Indian adults of American Heart Association (JAHA)
A report by the Public Health and PLOS ONE. High salt consumption
Foundation of India claims that the leads to various cardiovascular disea-
daily average salt consumption among ses (including hypertension), which
P HOTO GRA P H BY T H E VO O RHE S
adult Indians far exceeds prescribed caused nearly 2.8 million deaths in
levels. The 2017 study, which sur- India in 2016, The Lancet reports.
veyed 1,395 adults across rural and
urban areas in Delhi, Haryana and The 16:8 diet
Andhra Pradesh, shows that intake In a small study, researchers at
was 9.5 grams per day in the northern the University of Illinois, Chicago,
states and 10.4 grams per day in USA, recruited 23 obese participants
the southern one. Both exceed the to spend 12 weeks following a type
WHO-recommended daily intake level of intermittent fasting called the

16:8 diet. In the eight hours between Antibiotics may foster
10 a.m. and 6 p.m., participants could kidney stones
eat as much as they wanted of any A study that examined more than
food. However, for the remaining 2,80,000 UK patients’ records
16 hours of the day, they were allowed suggests that people who took five
to have only water and other calorie- common types of oral antibiotics
free drinks. Compared with a control (sulphas, broad-spectrum penici-
group, the 16:8 dieters consumed an llins, fluoroquinolones, cephalospo-
average of 300 fewer calories per day, rins or nitrofurantoin/methenamine)
lost three per cent of their weight, and had a greater chance of developing
saw a significant drop in their systolic kidney stones within a year.
blood pressure. One reason may
simply be that the 16:8 diet is easier Fatty fish to fight asthma
for most people to maintain than Air pollution in many Indian cities
other types of intermittent fasting. have risen to ‘very poor’ and ‘severe’
levels, leaving asthmatics particularly
A blood test that may warn vulnerable to full-blown attacks.
of Alzheimer’s sooner According to estimates, approximately
The only way to catch Alzheimer’s 1.5 to 2 crore Indians suffer from
early—allowing treatment to slow the asthma, of which 10 to 15 per cent
progression of symptoms—is through are children between five and 11 years
expensive imaging or invasive tests. old. A recent clinical trial done by
Now researchers have developed a La Trobe University in Australia
blood test that they hope will spot the shows that maintaining a Mediterra-
amyloid beta that forms brain plaque, nean diet, which is primarily plant-
a hallmark of the disease. Working based, with fatty fish, such as salmon,
with archived blood that had been trout and sardines (high in omega-3
collected between July 2000 and fatty acids) included at least twice a
December 2002 from participants in week, can improve lung function and
a study of adults aged 50 to 75, they reduce lung inflammation in children.
compared samples from 65 people The efficacy of oily fish in alleviating
who were later diagnosed with Alzhei- asthma-related problems appears in
mer’s to more than 800 controls. The other reports as well, such as the one
new test correctly identified those published by the University of Roches-
with the disease in almost 70 per cent ter Medical Center, USA, in the Journal
of the cases—and it would have done of Clinical Investigation—Insight in
so as many as eight years before they 2017 and a 2016 study from the New
received their diagnosis using the England Journal of Medicine.
current tests. —WITH INPUTS BY ISHANI NANDI

FOOD
The magic of the season is in dining together
A Hearty Feast
BY BL ESSY AU G U STI N E
A FEW YEARS AGO, I came across a story titled

‘Thanksgiving in Mongolia’. It was a heartbreaking
account of a woman who travels to Ulaanbaatar
and suffers a miscarriage there. But it’s the title
that stayed with me. ‘Thanksgiving in Mongolia’—I
imagined a traveller sitting down for dinner in a cosy
house in some remote part of the country. Her hosts
don’t generally celebrate the holiday but they’ve put
up rudimentary decorations and prepared a special
meal to make their guest feel at home.
Since I do not celebrate Thanksgiving, the deco-
rations in the imagined Mongolian hosts’ dining
area transmuted into hollies and mistletoes. Every
Christmas, this image reminds me to be grateful for
the many families I have made away from home.
Instead of going back to the nostalgic idea of a festi-
val and desperately trying to recreate and recapture
it, the holidays become an acknowledgement of the
journeys I have made and the special people I have
encountered along the way.
Here are some tips to be good ‘Mongolian’ hosts:
QTHE SETTING Call friends over. You can’t be
hostus mostus if you don’t have guests. Celebrations
on Christmas Eve are more religious in nature with
believers attending midnight Mass. The feast is gene-
rally an afternoon affair on Christmas Day.
QDECORATE YOUR HOUSE There’s no dearth of
decorations available in the market, from artificial pine
trees to pre-assembled nativity scenes. You don’t have

to buy them, though. Making decorations from
scratch is a fun way to involve the little ones.
QPLAY SOME CAROLS No one heralds Christmas
the way Jim Reeves does with his mellow baritone.
Reeves’s album Twelve Songs of Christmas is the
only playlist you need for your get-together.
QTHE CHRISTMAS FEAST Make a hearty meal.
Contrary to popular imagination, a whole roast
turkey or a suckling pig is not a staple Christmas
meal. Food practices are more about region than
religion. While Goans may feast on vindaloo (pork
marinated with vinegar and spices), the Christians
of Meghalaya turn to their favourite dohneiiong
(pork with black sesame). Duck moile, made by
marinating duck meat in bottle masala (a blend of
30 spices), is central to the East Indian household,
while mutton biryani is the hero in an Andhra
home. Even the cakes are local. Puducherry’s
vivikam cake, for instance, is made with roasted
MULLED WINE
Serves 6
Ingredients
Q750 ml red wine or port wine
Q100 ml gin
Q1 large cinnamon stick
Q2 star anise pods

Q4 cloves
Q2 strips lemon zest
Method
1. Put the wine, spices and lemon zest in a large
pan and simmer over low heat for 10–12 mins.
2. Remove from heat and cool.
3. When ready to serve, heat without boiling
and stir in the gin. Serve warm.
Recipe courtesy Chef Jinson Varghese, Mahabelly, New Delhi

A HEARTY FEAST
THARAVU (DUCK) ROAST

Serves 6
Ingredients
Q2 kg of duck, cut into 12–15 pieces
Q3 tbsp of sliced fresh ginger
Q12 cloves of garlic, sliced

Q6 green chillies, chopped
Q12 curry leaves
Q3 tbsp of vinegar
2 tbsp of crushed
Q
black peppercorns 2. Remove the pot from the stove

Q2 tbsp of salt
Recipe adapted at Mahabelly, New Delhi, from The Suriani Kitchen (Westland).
once the duck is tender and the gravy
Q12 cups of water reduced to about 2 cups. Take out the
Q cup of coconut oil duck pieces and reserve the gravy.
Q4 large onions, sliced 3. Fry the sliced onions in a large
For the spice powder skillet. When they turn golden brown,
Warm 6 cardamom pods, 5 whole take them out of the oil and set aside.
cloves and a 2-inch cinnamon stick In the same oil, fry the duck pieces in
slightly in a small, dry skillet and then batches for 4–5 minutes, until they
grind to a powder. brown. Keep the pieces aside.
Method 4. When all the pieces have been
1. Put the duck, spice powder and fried, pour the gravy into the oil
all the ingredients, except for oil and cook for 2 minutes, or until it
and onions, in a heavy-bottomed has slightly thickened. Add the duck
pot. Cover the pot partially and and the fried onions, stir and cook for
cook the duck for 20–30 minutes 5 minutes, until the meat is coated
over low heat. with the gravy.
semolina and coconut milk, while QSERVE SOME WARMTH If you live
A LL I M AGE S : I N DI A P I C T UR E
the Allahabadi Christmas cake has in a part of the country where alcohol
petha (ash-gourd candy) and local consumption is not prohibited, you
marmalade as ingredients. can serve the classics: mulled wine
When planning your menu, it’s (see p 47) and eggnog. If you don’t
good to stick with cuisines you are want to serve alcohol, warm apple
familiar with and/or your guests are cider is a great hit with adults, while
comfortable eating. hot cocoa is a universal favourite.

Shocking Notes
PECULIAR PRODUCE
BY N ATH ANI EL BASE N
FORBIDDEN FRUIT when she found a lifeless,

On 1 November 2017, dime-sized frog in her
young shoppers at dish. She watched
the ASDA Hulme agog as her husband
Superstore in Man- gave one-finger chest
chester, UK, had to compressions to the
show identification to amphibian. The valiant
purchase four things: effort succeeded—the frog
prescription drugs, alcohol, tobacco was revived, and Garfinkel decided to
and … kiwi fruit. During a concert a keep him. For their trouble, the cou-
few nights prior, singer Harry Styles ple says they received a $5 Target gift
had slipped onstage while perform- card and a new pet, named ‘Lucky’.
ing a song that shares a name with
the green-fleshed vine-berry; the MISTAKEN IDENTITY
furry-skinned fruit had been Last year, in Bretten, Germany, police
launched from the crowd below. investigated what one man thought
Styles was unharmed (he held his was an undetonated weapon from
mic stand for support). ASDA, the the Second World War. They were
superstore’s parent company, didn’t right to be cautious: A few months
want to endanger Styles, so to pre- earlier, a similar situation necessi-
vent a repeat attack at his show that tated a 60,000-person evacuation in
night, security policed the sale of nearby Frankfurt. After closer exami-
kiwis to anyone under 25. nation, though, it was determined
that the suspicious item wasn’t a
MIRACLE MEAL bomb but a zucchini. Investigators
In Corona, California, USA, this past admitted that the offending squash
P I E RR E LOR A N GE R
August, a daring dinner-time rescue did appear nefarious, but they con-
gave way to a lovely friendship. Becky cluded that a neighbour likely threw
Garfinkel was part-way through her it over the elderly man’s fence. The
spring-mix salad, purchased from toss has not, as of this writing, been
Target [a department store chain], declared an act of war.

PLANET
Clear the air of indoor toxics
Breathe Easy
AS THE PROBLEM of air pollution
reaches catastrophic proportions,
each of us becomes an involuntary
stakeholder. According to the latest
report by the World Health Organiza-
tion, over one lakh children below five
years of age died in India due to both
ambient and household air pollution
in 2016. Here are some ways to keep
yourself and your family safe.
soon as you get them home. Instead,
QTHERE’S NO GOOD SMOKE Limit air them outdoors for a day or two.
the use of candles and agarbattis. Even QAIR PURIFIERS Though affordable
if they are labelled as being herbal, ones may not be as efficient as high-
studies have shown that they emit end air purifiers, they will still help
toxic gases and PM2.5. If you must bring down dust, PM levels and other
use them, place them near windows. pollutants. Make sure you invest in
QVACUUM THOROUGHLY Firstly, one that doesn’t emit formaldehyde
clean your house regularly with a and ozone as by-products, which
vacuum cleaner so that you get rid of further contribute to air pollution.
dust more efficiently. If you suffer from QVENTILATE When running your
asthma or allergies, invest in a cleaner air purifier, keep your windows and
with a high-efficiency particulate air doors shut so that you don’t overuse
(HEPA) filter which will retain particles the filter. However, an air purifier
measuring 0.3 microns and larger, doesn’t produce oxygen or reduce
instead of blowing it back into the air. carbon dioxide, whose level increases
QDON’T TAKE IT TO THE the longer you stay in a room. Hence,
CLEANERS Perchloroethylene is it’s important to ventilate your rooms
a liquid solvent used to dry-clean so that you are not constantly breath-
clothes. It is a serious air pollutant ing in exhaled air. Plus, it’s the only
I N DI A P I C T U R E
and long-term exposure can even way to get rid of mould and fungi that
cause cancer. Avoid hanging your thrive in closed, damp spaces.
dry-cleaned clothes in the closet as —BY BLESSY AUGUSTINE
BASED ON THE BOOK HOW TO GROW FRESH AIR, BY KAMAL MEATTLE AND BARUN AGGARWAL,
PUBLISHED BY JUGGERNAUT IN NOVEMBER 2018.

TRAVEL
From carnivals and carols to local flavours and feasts,

try these year-end destinations across the country
Where to Go
This Christmas
BY B U S H RA AHM E D
Kolkata merrymakers. Here you can dine at

To truly experience Christmas in heritage restaurants such as Trincas,
India, you must have Kolkata on your Peter Cat and Mocambo. Continue to
year-end travel plan. As the former New Market for some Christmas shop-
British India capital and due to wide- ping and while you’re there, drop in at
spread missionary presence, Kolkata Nahoum and Sons, a Jewish bakery
erupts in celebration during this time. operating since 1902. Another must?
Arguably, the epicentre of all the ac- The joyous celebrations of Bow fest
tion is Park Street, which turns into at Bow Barracks—home to the city’s
a vehicle-free, open-air party full of Anglo-Indian community.
Kolkata’s Park Street glitters with festive

lights and decorations every Christmas.

Midnight Mass at St Paul’s Cathe-
dral, modelled after the Canterbury
Cathedral in England, is grand, but if
you’re not fond of large crowds, try
St John’s, India’s first Anglican church,
or St Andrews, the only Scottish
church in the city.
An insider secret is the Kolkata club
culture. A leftover from the colonial
days, clubs like the Tollygunge Club,
Bengal Club and Dalhousie Institute
The famed Santa Cruz Basilica in Kochi
are famous for Christmas soirées with
lunches, dancing, singing and live 18th-century building. Visit the
bands belting out retro tracks. Entry Cochin Carnival for spectacular pro-
into these clubs is through member- cessions led by decked-up elephants
ship only, so ask a member to take you and people in bright costumes. One
along for a memorable experience. more important event is the Kochi–
Muziris Biennale, an international art
Kochi festival that begins around this time.
Christmas is celebrated with equal
fervour all over Kerala, but Kochi is Shimla
where Yuletide celebrations shine in Shimla is a well-trodden summer desti-
full glory. Start by visiting the Santa nation. But Christmas in Shimla is a dif-
Cruz Basilica and St Francis Church. ferent experience altogether. The whole
The latter is especially interesting to town is full of beautiful churches in fes-
history buffs—not only is it one of tive finery, with the oldest and grandest
India’s oldest churches but it once one, Christ Church, opening up its
housed the remains of the Portuguese doors for Mass. Fun fact: Christ Church
explorer Vasco da Gama. Explore the houses the oldest pipe organ in the In-
Fort Kochi area amidst buntings, dian subcontinent. Brought here in
Santa Claus and angel statues 1899, it is played at Mass every year.
and choir music in the air. Other neo-Gothic buildings to see
No one should miss the most- are the Institute of Advanced Study,
impressive Kathakali performances Gorton Castle, Bantony Castle and the
when in Kerala, so visit the Kerala Viceregal Lodge. For some Christmas
Kathakali Centre to catch a daily show shopping, Lakka Bazaar for woollens
between 6 and 7:30 p.m. For scrump- and Mall Road for trinkets and deco-
ALAMY
tious local food, try Fort House, Old rations are ideal. Shimla’s pine and
Harbour or Malabar House, set in an deodar forests make for some fabulous

5 R E AS O N S A T R I P TO N E W Z E A L A N D I S A N E Y E - O P E N E R
Festive knick-knacks and trinkets make for a fun day of shopping in Shillong.
hiking trails when the crowds over- ribs and weekly gigs by the famous
whelm. If you’re lucky, it might just be musician Lou Majaw.
the year of a white Christmas too.
Daman and Diu
Shillong Give the crowded beaches of Goa
For local flavour, cool temperatures a miss and head to Daman and Diu,
and less touristy crowds, head to two quaint towns divided by the
Meghalaya’s capital, Shillong. Known Arabian Sea. For about 400 years,
for its vibrant music scene, the city Daman and Diu were under Portu-
resonates with live bands playing guese rule and retain many customs
gospel music, carol sessions at and traditions that existed then, in-
churches and people singing tradi- cluding rolicking Christmas revelry.
tional Khasi songs as well. Catch the traditional Portuguese
Make sure to see the 144-year-old dance Corridinho here and savour
cedar tree at All Saints’ Cathedral. the famed Christmas cookies made
One cannot be in Shillong and by local women. With its Gothic-style
not taste the local food. Cafes are architecture, shell-shaped motifs and
plentiful and delicious fruit cake ornate furnishings, St Paul’s Church
is served nearly everywhere. Try for midnight Mass is a must. While
local delicacies such as wak pura there, head to the historic St Jerome
and sakin gata, a sweet sticky-rice Fort, also called the fort of Nani Da-
preparation. There are many places man and the 16th-century Diu Fort.
to visit near Shillong, but during Not far from Diu Fort are the
Christmas, do as the locals do and sandstone Naida caves. For a quieter
head to Sacred Forest at Mawphlang experience, explore the casuarina-
for a picnic. For shopping, go to lined Jampore beach, Devka beach
Police Bazaar and grab a bite at with its white sands and peaceful
ALAMY
Cafe Shillong, famous for its pork Chakratirth beach.

Laugh Lines
HAPPY HOLLY-DAZE!
Call me crazy, but ‘dropping

I hate freeloaders who join in the ball’ does not sound like
the New Year’s Eve countdown a good way to start off a new
for the last 10 seconds. I’ve year. @BOOK_KRAZY
been doing this all year. Where
were you back in May?
@THENEWSATGLENN
I don’t know
who’s worse, the
people who sign
“It is way too their cats’ names
early for Christ- on Christmas
mas music.” cards or the cats
—people in the who refuse to
year 75 BC sign. @CPIN42
@ONLINE_SHAWN
The Hanu-
kkah miracle
is that the
menorah oil
lasted eight
extra days. I To all those who
recreate this received a book
miracle with from me as a Christ-
every tube of mas present ... they
S HU T T E RSTO C K ( 3 )
toothpaste. are due back at the

@DAEMONIC3 library tomorrow.
@KELLYWITHAWHY

COVER STORY
A Season
of
This Christmas, we’d like to share
these stories—these gifts—of wonder,
faith and eternal life
A R
honda Gill froze as she heard her four-year-
old daughter, Desiree, sobbing quietly in
P HOTO GRA P HS BY YAS U + J U N KO
the family room that morning in October

Message 1993. Rhonda tiptoed through the doorway. The
tiny child was hugging a photograph of her father,
from a who had died nine months earlier. Rhonda, 24,

watched as Desiree gently ran her fingers around
Mermaid
her father’s face. “Daddy,” she said softly, “why
won’t you come back?”
The petite brunette college student felt a surge
BY MA RG O PF EI F F
of despair. It had been hard enough coping with

A SEASON OF MIRACLES
the death of her husband, Ken Gill, but her child in, Desiree announced, “I
her daughter’s grief was more than she want to die, Mummy, so I can be with
could bear. Daddy.” God help me, Rhonda prayed.
Ken and Rhonda, of Yuba City, What more can I do?
California, had met when Rhonda was
E
18, and they married after a whirlwind ighth November 1993 would have
courtship. Their daughter, Desiree, been Ken’s 29th birthday. “How
was born on 9 January 1989. Ken was a will I send him a card?” Desiree
gentle man whom everyone loved. His asked her grandmother. “How about if
big passion was his daughter. “She’s a we tie a letter to a balloon,” Trish said,
real daddy’s girl,” Rhonda would often “and send it up to heaven?” Desiree’s
say as Ken’s eyes twinkled with pride. eyes immediately lit up.
Father and daughter went everywhere On their way to the cemetery, the
together: hiking, dune buggy riding back seat of the car full of flowers for
and fishing for bass and salmon on the their planned grave-site visit, the three
Feather River. stopped at a store. “Help Mum pick out
Instead of gradually adjusting to her a balloon,” Trish instructed. At a rack
father’s death, Desiree refused to accept where dozens of silver helium-filled
it. “Daddy will be home soon,” she’d Mylar balloons bobbed, Desiree made
tell her mother. “He’s at work.” When an instant decision: “That one!” HAPPY
she played with her toy telephone, she BIRTHDAY was emblazoned above a
pretended she was chatting with him. “I drawing of Ariel from the Disney film
miss you, Daddy,” she’d say. “When will The Little Mermaid. Desiree and her
you come back?” father had often watched it.
Immediately after Ken’s death, The child’s eyes shone as they
Rhonda moved from her apartment arranged flowers on Ken’s grave. It was
in Yuba City to her mother’s home in a beautiful day, with a slight breeze
nearby Live Oak. Seven weeks after the rippling the eucalyptus trees. Then
funeral, Desiree was still inconsolable. Desiree dictated a letter to her dad.
“I just don’t know what to do,” Rhonda “Tell him, ‘Happy birthday, I love you
told her mother, Trish Moore, a 47-year- and miss you,’” she rattled off. “‘I hope
old medical assistant. you get this and can write to me on my
As a last resort, Trish took Desiree to birthday in January.’”
Ken’s grave, hoping it would help her Trish wrote the message and their
come to terms with his death. The child address on a small piece of paper,
laid her head against his gravestone and which was then wrapped in plastic
said, “Maybe if I listen hard enough I and tied to the end of the string
can hear Daddy talk to me.” on the balloon. Finally, Desiree released
Then one evening, as Rhonda tucked the balloon.

For almost an hour, they watched home later, he said, “Look at this,”
the shining spot of silver grow smaller. and showed her the balloon and note.
“OK,” Trish said at last. “Time to Intrigued, she read: “Eighth November
go home.” Rhonda and Trish were 1993. Happy birthday, Daddy ...” It
beginning to walk slowly from the finished with a mailing address in
grave when they heard Desiree Live Oak, California.
shout excitedly, “Did you see that? “It’s only 12 November,” Wade
I saw Daddy reach down and take it!” exclaimed. “This balloon travelled
The balloon, visible just moments almost 5,000 kilometres in four days!”
earlier, had disappeared. “Now Dad’s “And look,” said Donna, “this is a
going to write back to me,” Desiree Little Mermaid balloon, and it landed
declared as she walked past them at Mermaid Lake.”
towards the car. “We have to write to Desiree,” Wade
said. “Maybe we were chosen to help
O
n a cold November morning this little girl.” But he could see that
on Prince Edward Island in his wife didn’t feel the same way.
eastern Canada, 32-year- With tears in her eyes, Donna
old Wade MacKinnon pulled on his stepped away from the balloon.
waterproof duck-hunting gear and “Such a young girl having to deal with
jumped into his pickup. Wade, a death—it’s awful,” she said.
forest ranger, lived with his wife and Wade placed the note in a drawer
three children in Mermaid, a rural and tied the balloon, still buoyant, to
community a few kilometres east of the railing of the balcony in their living
Charlottetown. room. But the sight of the balloon
He drove to Mermaid Lake, about made Donna uncomfortable. A few
three kilometres away, and hiked past days later, she stuffed it in a closet.
dripping spruce and pine and soon en- As the weeks went by, Donna found
tered a cranberry bog. In the bushes on herself thinking more and more about
the shoreline, something fluttered and the balloon. It had flown over the
caught his eye. Curious, he approached Rocky Mountains and the Great Lakes.
to find a silver balloon snagged in the Just a few more kilometres and it would
branches of a thigh-high bayberry have landed in the ocean. Instead, it
bush. Printed on one side was a picture had stopped there, in Mermaid.
of a mermaid. When he untangled the Our three children are so lucky,
string, he found a soggy piece of paper she thought. They have two healthy
at the end of it, wrapped in plastic. parents. She imagined how their
At home, Wade carefully removed daughter, Hailey, almost two years
the wet note, allowing it to dry. When old, would feel if Wade were to die.
his wife, Donna MacKinnon, came The next morning, Donna said to
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Wade, “You’re right. We have to try to

help Desiree.”
In a Charlottetown bookstore,
Donna bought an adaptation of
The Little Mermaid. A few days later, just
after Christmas, Wade brought home Rockin’ Around
a birthday card that read “For a Dear Reader miracle My stepfather,
Daughter, Loving Birthday Wishes.” Marlin, bought a dancing
Donna sat down one morning to Christmas tree in the mid-
write a letter to Desiree. When she 2000s as a gimmick decoration.
finished, she tucked it into the birthday Marlin passed away in 2014,
and my sister, Stacy, took
card, wrapped it up with the book and
possession of the tree. Stacy
mailed the gift on 3 January 1994. got engaged to her long-time
D
boyfriend on Thanksgiving
esiree’s fifth birthday came and night. The tree was unpacked,
went quietly with a small party but it had no batteries. Later
on 9 January. Every day since that evening, with all the ladies
they’d released the balloon, Desiree had sitting around talking, the tree
asked Rhonda, “Do you think Daddy lit up and started to dance. The
empty battery pack was in
has my balloon yet?” After her party,
hand, and the only conclusion
she stopped asking. we could reach was that Marlin
Late on the afternoon of 19 January, was sending his blessing and
the MacKinnons’ package arrived. dancing a jig. —Norman Powers
Busy cooking dinner, Trish looked Sheffield, Alabama
at the unfamiliar return address and
assumed it was a birthday gift for
Desiree from someone in Ken’s family.
Rhonda and Desiree had moved back
to Yuba City, so Trish decided to
deliver it to Rhonda the next day.
As Trish watched television that
COURTESY NORMAN POWERS
evening, a thought nagged at her.

Why would someone send a parcel for
Desiree to this address? She opened
the package and found the card. “For
a Dear Daughter ...” Her heart raced.
Dear God! she thought, and she
reached for the telephone. It was after Marlin’s spirit lit up his family’s holiday.
midnight, but she had to call Rhonda.

When Trish, eyes red from weeping, so your daddy wanted someone to do
pulled into Rhonda’s driveway the his shopping for him. I think he picked
next morning at 6:45, her daughter us because we live in a town called
and granddaughter were already up. Mermaid.’” Trish continued reading: “‘I
Rhonda and Trish sat Desiree between know your daddy would want you to be
them on the couch. Trish said, “Desiree, happy and not sad. I know he loves you
this is for you,” and handed her the very much and will always be watching
parcel. “It’s from your daddy.” over you. Lots of love, the MacKinnons.’”
“I know,” said Desiree matter-of- When Trish finished, she looked at
factly. “Here, Grandma, read it to me.” Desiree. “I knew Daddy would find a
“‘Happy birthday from your daddy,’” way not to forget me,” the child said.
Trish began. “‘I guess you must be Wiping the tears from her eyes, Trish
wondering who we are. Well, it all began to read The Little Mermaid book
started in November when my husband, that the MacKinnons had sent. The
Wade, went duck hunting. Guess what story was different from the one Ken
he found? A mermaid balloon that had so often read to the child. In that
you sent your daddy ...’” Trish paused. version, the mermaid lives happily
A tear began to trickle down Desiree’s ever after with the handsome prince.
cheek. “‘There are no stores in heaven, But in this one, she dies because a
wicked witch has taken her tail. Three
angels carry her away.
As Trish finished reading, she
worried that the ending would upset
her granddaughter. But Desiree put her
hands on her cheeks with delight. “She
goes to heaven!” she cried. “That’s why
Daddy sent me this book. Because the
mermaid goes to heaven just like him!”
I
n mid-February, the MacKinnons
received a letter from Rhonda: “On
19 January my little girl’s dream came
COURTESY DESIREE STUTZ
true when your parcel arrived.”

During the next few weeks, the Mac-
Kinnons and the Gills often telephoned.
Then, in March, Rhonda, Trish, and
Desiree flew to Prince Edward Island to
Desiree and her grandmother, Trish, on a meet the MacKinnons. As the two fami-
Christmas Day in the ’90s lies walked through the forest to see the
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Kyle (centre) with his brother, Trevor
(left) and mother, Connie
mystery it held. Soon I heard my

own voice. In a whisper, I say, “It’s
Christmas morning, and Kyle is still
sleeping.” Kyle awakens and sleepily
comes to the realization that he gets
to check the tree. His childish voice
goes on to name his toys from Santa.
The last words on the tape are both
The Christmas heartfelt and heartbreaking. They are
Cassette three-year-old Kyle saying “Merry
Christmas, Mum!” I know my son
Reader miracle In June 2003, made this Christmas miracle happen
I buried my 26-year-old son. so I could have a smile in my heart
The following Christmas was the that morning. —Connie Owen
worst of my life. I was consumed South Milwaukee, Wisconsin
with grief to my very core. As I
awoke early Christmas morning, I
decided to write a few Christmas
cards, belated or not. I went to
the drawer where I stored the
boxed cards. The drawer
would open only slightly;
something was jamming it.
The cause of the jam was
an unlabelled cassette. I had
no idea what was on it or how
it had gotten there. I popped
the cassette in the player and
waited to hear whatever
spot beside the lake where Wade had “People tell me, ‘What a coincidence
found the balloon, Rhonda and Desiree that your mermaid balloon landed
COURTESY CONNIE OWEN
fell silent. It seemed as though Ken was so far away at a place called Mermaid
there with them. Lake,’” says Rhonda. “But we know Ken
In the months after, whenever picked the MacKinnons as a way to send
Desiree wanted to talk about her dad, his love to Desiree. She understands
she called the MacKinnons. A few now that her father is with her always.”
minutes on the phone soothed her as This story originally appeared in the
nothing else could. September 1995 issue of Reader’s Digest.

Life-Giving Touch
BY JULI ANA L A BI AN C A
O
n 25 March 2010, Kate and it sounds stupid, but if he was still
David Ogg heard the words gasping, that was a sign of life. I wasn’t
every parent dreads: Their going to give up easily.”
newborn wasn’t going to make it. Still, the Sydney couple knew this
Their twins—a girl and a boy— was likely goodbye. In an effort to
were born two minutes apart and cherish her last minutes with the tiny
14 weeks premature, weighing just boy, Kate asked to hold him.
over two pounds each. Doctors had “I wanted to meet him, and for him
tried to save the boy for 20 minutes to know us,” Kate told Today. “We’d
but saw no improvement. His resigned ourselves to the fact that we
heartbeat was nearly gone, and he’d were going to lose him, and we were
stopped breathing. The baby had just just trying to make the most of those
moments to live. last, precious moments.”
“I saw him gasp, but the doctor Kate unwrapped the boy, whom the
said it was no use,” Kate told the couple had already named Jamie, from
Daily Mail five years later. “I know his hospital blanket and ordered David
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to take his shirt off and join them in bed.

The first-time parents wanted their son
to be as warm as possible and hoped
the skin-to-skin contact would improve
his condition. They also talked to him. Photo from Heaven
“We were trying to entice him to stay,”
Kate told the Daily Mail. “We explained Reader miracle My daughter
his name and that he had a twin that and only child, Talena, was
killed by a drugged driver in
he had to look out for and how hard we
1994. It nearly destroyed me,
had tried to have him.” but I kept going somehow. I
had a favourite picture of
Talena from when she was
about three—Christmas Day,
me sitting on the floor and her
sitting on my lap. The bond
between us was so beautiful.
Somehow, I lost that picture
after she died. A few years
later, on Christmas Day, I
opened a book and found
the photo inside. I know she
FAR RIGHT: COURTESY DAYLE VICKERY. RIGHT: COURTESY KATE OGG
sent it to me as a present
from heaven. —Dayle Vickery
Emily (left), Kate (centre) and Jamie Orange Park, Florida
Then something miraculous

happened. Jamie gasped again—and
then he started breathing. Finally, he
reached for his father’s finger.
The couple’s lost boy had made it.
“We’re the luckiest people in the
world,” David told Today.
Eight years later, Jamie and his sister,
Emily, are happy and healthy. The Oggs
only recently told the kids the story of
their birth. “Emily burst into tears,” Kate
said. “She was really upset, and she kept Dayle found this photo of
her and her daughter from
hugging Jamie. This whole experience
Christmas Day 1987.
makes you cherish them more.”

MY STORY
How I ticked off

GEORGE HARRISON
in 1976 …
… and got into Martin Scorcese’s film
on the third Beatle 35 years later
BY C . Y. GO P IN AT H
I L LU ST R ATI ON BY PRIYA KURI YAN
GEORGE HARRISON was clearly the youth magazine where I was

upset. I could tell from the way he was a reporter. Around mid-morning,
glowering at me. His lips were tight; I was summoned to the editor’s
he looked very ticked off. room. Desmond Doig, an Irishman in
We were standing facing the trellis his 50s, was looking very serious,
door of an ancient lift on the seventh which meant that he could barely
floor of a crumbling apartment contain his excitement.
building in Calcutta. The year was 1976. “ R u m o u r h a s i t ,” h e s a i d
Behind him was the closed door of his melodramatically, “that a certain
house. We could hear the lift cranking G e o r g e Ha r r i s o n i s c u r r e n t l y
up slowly from the ground floor, somewhere in this very city. Rumour
stopping at every floor. It would take at adds that he may not be here
least five minutes to reach us. tomorrow. It is whispered that he will
I had Harrison all to myself for be off to the holy city of Varanasi. Your
five minutes. And there was only one assignment for the day is to track him
question I wanted to ask him. down, interview him and thus, get the
scoop of your lifetime.”
IT HAD ALL STARTED as just And so it began.
another uneventful morning in the Calcutta is not a big city; every-
offices of Junior Statesman (JS), one knows everyone else. These were

HOW I TICKED OFF GEORGE HARRISON IN 1976 …
the days before the internet, SMS and available, opposite the cranky Indian
WhatsApp, but I was sure that a few dance critic—a man widely regarded
strategically placed calls would yield as supercilious and nasty.
results. I started with the city’s thriving “Ruddy prima donna!” he cursed, as
rock-and-roll fraternity. he slurped up the mulligatawny soup.
My first task was to sweet-talk “Who?” I asked, not that I cared.
Cynthia, the operator on duty at the “The whole ruddy family!” he said.
telephone exchange of The Statesman “Just because one is a musician and
newspaper, into giving top priority the other a dancer, they think the sun
to my calls. Cynthia was a softie, plus shines from their you-know-wheres,
she kinda liked me. and they don’t have to
She put me through to keep appointments.”
Nondon Bagchi, drummer “Which is this artistic
with Calcutta’s legendary family skipping appoint-
rock group, Great Bear; ments?” I asked absently.
Dilip Balakrishnan, their “The Shankars!” he said,
guitarist and singer; Lou slamming the bread into
Hilt, bassist with another his soup, spilling it all over
group; Louis Banks, jazz himself in the process.
maestro; Braz Gonsalves, “Ravi Shankar?” I asked,
By lunchtime, I was no closer to finding George.

My job as an investigative reporter was on the line.
another jazz player. Many of them had my interest piqued. Everybody knew
just woken up. All of them sounded George Harrison was gung-ho about
vaguely offended that George was in Ravi Shankar.
town and no one had told them. “No,” said the dance critic grumpily.
“Try the night clubs,” said a fellow “Don’t you journalists know anything?
reporter, “Maybe George has a gig Ravi Shankar lives in Varanasi, not
at one of them.” Great idea! I called Calcutta. I’m talking about his brother
up Trincas, the Moulin Rouge (no, Uday Shankar, the dancer.”
not the French one, just the Bengali “He skipped an appointment
imitation) and Mocambo. But no joy. with you?”
By lunchtime, I was no closer “Exactly,” he said, frowning. “Said he
to finding George. My job as an had a special guest to attend to.”
investigative reporter was on the line. “And that guest was?” I asked,
I was despondent as I went to the staff now fully alert.
canteen for lunch. I took the only seat “I don’t know,” he said. “Some

stupid foreigner who is going to with Mr Uday Shankar. At this, the door
Varanasi tomorrow to buy a clay statue.” opened trustingly and I walked right
Jackpot! into the house. Not missing a beat,
I called Uday Shankar’s house (with Harrison simultaneously walked past
a little help from dear Cynthia) saying me straight out of the house. The door
I had a package for him. Would he be closed behind him. He was outside, and
home to receive it? Yes, he would. I I was in. Not to be outdone so close to
said I also had a letter for a Mr Harri- my target, I stepped out again, closing
son … did any such person live there? the door behind me. And there we were,
The phone slammed down. George Harrison and I, waiting for the
Almost at once, I heard Cynthia’s infinitely slow lift.
voice. She had been eavesdropping all I looked at him. He scowled at the
morning, and knew everything I knew. trellis door. He was dressed in pyja-
“S o,” s h e s a i d . “O f f t o m e e t mas and a kurta; his hair flowed long
George Harrison?” behind him. I was absolutely certain
I confessed. of one thing: There was going to be no
“How about you ask him for an scoop interview. I thought of Cynthia.
autograph for your dear friend Cynthia She was probably excitedly telling all
who helped you so much today?” her friends she was soon to get George
“No problem at all,” I said. Harrison’s autograph.
I extended my reporter’s notebook
ABOUT AN HOUR LATER, we were towards him, open on a fresh page.
in the compound of the mossy old “Could I have your autograph, please,
building where Uday Shankar lived. sir, Mr Harrison?” I said.
The lift, with its octogenarian liftman He gave me a withering look.
half-asleep like the dormouse in Alice “I thought you were from the Press,
in Wonderland, stopped at every floor man!” he snapped, and turned away.
whether anyone was there or not. And those were the only words
Five minutes later, I rang Uday George Harrison ever spoke to me. The
Shankar’s doorbell. It cracked open and lift arrived, I departed, and the legend
the cook’s head emerged. “Yes? What went back into the house.
do you want?” As for Cynthia, she got her George
Behind him, I could see the gaunt Harrison autograph. To this day, she
face of the most legendary lead guitarist believes that George signed it.
of our times, the third Beatle—George Author’s note: My story, What was George Harrison
Harrison. He looked worried and Doing by the Ganges at Midnight? appeared in JS
magazine. Harrison died of lung cancer in 2001. In
anxious. Clearly, being discovered by 2013, Martin Scorsese made a biopic on him called
George Harrison: Living in the Material World. In
the press was his favourite nightmare. one shot, the camera zooms into my 1976 article
I told the cook I had an appointment on the music legend with my byline in clear view.

From office
get-togethers to
swanky shindigs,
you can commit a
party foul anywhere.
These tips can
help save you
’Tis the Season of

Social Disasters BY LAUR A LEE
FR OM T H E BO OK AVO ID IN G E VERY DAY DI SASTE RS
Smiling conveys openness and warmth, but

THE AWKWARD if you immediately jump to a full-on grin,
you will come across like a salesperson.
GREETING Instead, try this trick: Stand in front of a
mirror and repeat the word ‘great’ in a num-
ber of funny voices. This should make you
smile. The next time you meet someone,
think ‘great’, and you’ll flash a natural-
looking smile. Keep your arms uncrossed
and your hands unclenched. If you can,
I L LU ST RAT I O N S BY P ET E R A RK LE
stand up for greetings. If you’re in a
booth at a restaurant and can’t get up,
extend your hand and say, “Excuse
me for not standing. Pleased to
meet you.” Lastly, poor eye contact
will make you seem dishonest, but
don’t carry it too far. If you stare
too long, you’ll make the other
person uncomfortable.

This may THE JOKE’S
sound ON YOU
obvious,
but to tell a
joke, you have to remember
it. The biggest joke disasters
happen when you launch into
your humorous tale only to
discover that you have not
quite committed the pertinent
details—for example, the punch
line—to memory. So as soon as
you hear a joke that you might
want to tell later, write it down.
Telling a joke is not like reenact-
ing the Mahabharata. Be brief,
upbeat and to the point. Get to
the punch line in as few steps as
possible, but be sure you don’t
leave out any important bits.
PLAYING PASS When you meet a new baby, there is a good

chance that someone will ask whether you
THE BABY want to hold her. If you are the type that gets
nervous about this, have faith. You do not ran-
domly drop other things, so the odds are you can manage to cradle a new-
born for two minutes. Just relax and let the baby rest in your arms. The main
thing to remember is that you need to support her head: In the first four to six
weeks, a baby’s head is actually heavier than the muscles of
the neck can handle, and she won’t
develop enough neck control to
hold up her own head until she is
three to four months old. It is not
necessary to bring the baby a gift,
although it’s not wrong to do so
and will likely be appreciated. If the
new arrival has siblings, bring
something small for them, too,
so they do not feel jealous.

’TIS THE SEASON OF SOCIAL DISASTERS
MEET MY EX–BEST
FRIEND’S LOVER’S SON
You’re over 30 and have been
with the same guy for three years,
but you are not married. Calling
him your ‘boyfriend’ seems childish.
‘Significant other’ is a euphemistic
mouthful. ‘Partner’ sounds as if you’re
in business together, and ‘lover’ seems
too steamy. How do you introduce
him? Along similar lines, how do you
introduce your ex-husband? Or his
sister, who is still your friend, or his
biological children with his new wife?
Simple. Introduce the person by
name. “Debbie, I’d like you to meet
SHOWDOWN AT Ivan. Ivan, this is Debbie.” As the con-
HIGH SPOON versation progresses, the subject of
how you know each other may come
If you’re not one for parties with up naturally. You can decide then how
formal table settings, there is a much to disclose. Most people you
simple rule that will keep you from meet will not need to know—nor will
committing a cutlery gaffe. Start they even be that interested in—your
with the outermost fork and work family history and dramas.
your way in. There is an exception—
a soup spoon may be needed before
you get to the next fork on the far
left—but it should be obvious that
even the most rigid person does not
use forks for soup.
Bread is the most common way
people mess up on etiquette, at
least in the minds of those with an
eye for such things. Instead of biting
into a whole roll, put it on your
bread plate and tear off bite-size
pieces to butter and eat. You should
also check your napkin use. Once
everyone at your table is seated,
unfold the napkin and lay it across
your lap. When you finish eating
and leave the table, loosely crumple
your napkin to hide any stains and
set it to the left of your plate.

You do not want the bubbly bottle to be vertical CHAMPAGNE

when you’re opening it, or you might shoot AND SUFFERING
yourself in the face. If it is too close to horizontal,
however, the gas will float up and form a bubble in
the bottle’s shoulder. When you remove the cork, the bubble will
expand all at once and shoot the liquid out of the neck. It looks
impressive, but it’s messy and you’ll waste some expensive (or even
cheap) champagne. So the angle you’re looking for is 45 degrees.
This tilt will ensure that the gas stays in the neck.
Still, just to be sure, do not aim the bottle
directly at any person or anything fragile—it is
considered a social faux pas to destroy your aunt
Minnie’s collection of tiny, porcelain figurines. To
avoid losing your grip and accidentally dropping
the bottle on your feet, twist the bottle rather
than the cork.
POST-PARTY Dehydration is one of the main causes of hang-

over symptoms. The best thing to do is to alter-
DISORDER nate each alcoholic drink with a glass of water.
The next day, drink a lot of water or an elec-
trolyte solution (such as Gatorade). Even though you may not feel like it, eat
a well-balanced breakfast. Alcohol raises your insulin levels, which can make
you feel weak. Eating will raise your glucose levels. If you feel nauseated,
snack on toast or crackers to settle your stomach. Avoid coffee; caffeine
narrows your blood vessels and boosts your blood pressure, which will
make your hangover worse. Also, as much as you may want relief from pain,
steer clear of ibuprofen, aspirin and
paracetamol. All may aggravate
inflammation in the stomach and liver
caused by the alcohol.
To dodge 496 other

home, health, money and
life screw-ups, check out
Avoiding Everyday
Disasters, available for
sale on amazon.in and
other online bookshops.

ALL IN
A Day’s Work
I’M A NURSE at a children’s ward.
One night, I was at the nurses’ sta-
tion when I heard a little boy in his
room talking. He kept the patter up
for some time. Finally, I got on the
intercom and said softly but firmly,
“All right, Johnny, it’s time
to go to sleep now.”
There was quiet in the room,
and then he said, “OK, God, I will.”
I didn’t hear a peep from him
until morning. J. C., via email
IT WAS MY FIRST NIGHT caring

for an elderly patient. When he grew
sleepy, I wheeled his chair as close
to the bed as possible and, using
the techniques I’d learnt in school,
grasped him in a bear hug to lift him
on to the bed. But I couldn’t clear the
top of the mattress. So I grabbed him
again, summoned all my might and
hoisted him on to the bed.
When the night-shift nurse arrived, “I have to hang up now. I have an hour
I recounted what had happened. to get these reports done.”
CARTOON BY DAVE CARPENTER
“Funny,” she said, looking puzzled.

“Usually I just ask him to get in bed, Interviewer: What’s your greatest
and he does.” ERIN DOCKERY weakness?
Candidate: Women. That’s kind
THE PROCESS OF interviewing of why I’m looking for a new job.
for a new job is an important step. I had an affair with my boss’s wife.
Don’t screw it up like these job Interviewer: Did you bring your
candidates did: references with you?

Candidate: I tried; they couldn’t
get the time off work.
Interviewer: What makes you think
you’re right for a job working at a TAILS FROM THE OFFICE
fast-food restaurant?
Candidate: I’m great with animals.
Interviewer: Where do you see
yourself in five years?
Candidate: Probably some sort
of exotic beach somewhere.
coburgbanks.co.uk
I HAD JUST BEEN transferred to

a remote rural police station in
Marathwada, Maharashtra. On
my first day the telephone rang and
I picked up the receiver.
“Parali police station,” I said.
“Hello! Who are you speaking?”
asked the caller rudely. When you lied on your CV about
having previous sheepdog experience.
“Well, you called, mister. Tell me
@BORINGENORMOUS
your name first!” I said, irritated
by his tone.
“I am Vanwe calling,” he said, premier’ sounded quite right.
“What?” I asked, confused. So he finally decided on ‘Our
“Yes, my name is Vanwe, who beloved premier—third from left’.
are you?” he asked again. V. R. SHANKAR, Vi s a k h a p a t n a m
Totally ticked off by now, I said,
“Well, Mr One Way, this is WE ASKED PROSPECTIVE job
C H A RL E S M AC K I N N O N /S O L E NT N EWS
No Entry speaking!” and hung up. applicants at our company to fill out
ARVIND THONGE PATIL, P u n e a questionnaire. For the line “Choose
one word to summarize your stron-
A FORMER RUSSIAN PREMIER had gest professional attribute”, one
a penchant for getting himself photo- woman wrote, “I’m good at following
graphed in all kinds of groups. Once instructions.” theclever.com
he stood among a few piglets, which

made it difficult for the reporter to Reader’s Digest will pay for your funny
give an appropriate caption. Neither sections. Post it to the editorial address,
‘Premier with pigs’ nor ‘Pigs with or email: editor.india@rd.com

DRAMA IN REAL LIFE
On a snowy Canadian mountain, two British

men face a bear—and their own fear
PANIC
ON THE
MOUNTAIN
BY GREG BOSWELL F R OM GR E GB OSWELL .CO.UK

PA N I C O N T H E M O U N TA I N
O
n 30 November 2015, Greg Boswell, 24, from Fife,
Scotland, and Nick Bullock, 49, from Llanberis, North
Wales, had planned a day hike to ‘suss out’ the trail for
their ascent of 3,260-metre-high Mount Wilson in the Canadian
Rockies later that same week. They wanted to make the ascent
by using a route called Dirty Love. Neither had climbed on
Mount Wilson before, but both men were experienced climbers.
THE WAY UP was uneventful for we returned later in the week. We

us although there had been some decided to head down, back to the
technical climbing over two rock walls road, where we’d left our rental Jeep.
that had required the use of ropes and It was close to 7:45 p.m., and dark,
harnesses. All that was left was for as we started down the trail. On the
us to plod up the steep, snowy gully way up, we had followed some rather
for the next couple of hours to put a large animal tracks, and that had
good trail in for a quicker approach spooked me a little. But they had
when we came back up to make an looked hard-packed and very old, so
attempt at climbing Dirty Love later in probably nothing to worry about. It is
the week. We had already left the Canada after all, I thought, there are
ropes and harnesses at the top of animals everywhere, big and small.
the rock wall, ready for our descent We removed our snowshoes, and
later that night. made a swift retreat back down the
After walking for about 15 minutes gully that found us in soft snow once
through the woods, with our again. I stopped to fill up my water
crampons and axes still to hand, we bottle from a melting icefall and as I
opted to leave these beside our newly hurried after Nick, something made
trodden trail in the waist-deep powder me turn around.
I L LU ST RAT I ON S BY ST E V E N P. HU GHE S
snow. We decided to strip off most What I saw then will stay with me
of our excess gear and just continue for the rest of my life. There, bounding
with our snowshoes, walking poles full pace through the deep powder
and some food and water essentials snow about five metres from me was
in our packs. a grizzly bear. I’d never been so scared
After walking the majority of the way in all my life.
up the gully, we realized continuing I shouted to Nick, “IT’S A BEAR!” and
would be pointless as the snow had immediately tried to put some distance
become hard-packed and easy to between myself and this charging
walk on, and would be fine when shadow from the dark. Without my

then just grabbed my boot in its mouth
and spat it aside like an unwelcome pip
from an apple. In an instant it had my
THE BEAR GRABBED lower leg in its mouth and was tearing
MY BOOT AND SPAT and pulling. I felt it lift me up so that
IT ASIDE LIKE A just my shoulders were touching the
PIP FROM AN APPLE. fluffy white snow. I can’t describe how
scared I was.
The bear let my body back down
snowshoes on I immediately went up on to the snow, still with my right leg
to my waist in snow. firmly in its mouth, standing on my left
I felt sick. I frantically scrabbled leg, all the while tugging. By this time
through the snow on my back trying I was slapping at its face and muzzle
to keep moving, but what was coming with my left hand and screaming to
was inevitable! I screamed for Nick as Nick for help. My thumb accidentally
I saw the bear closing in. It made one went into its mouth whilst it held my
last leap through the air, and before it leg. I must have jabbed the roof of its
could land straight on me, I lifted my mouth because it grunted and let go.
right leg and booted it in the face. It Still screaming, I watched the

PA N I C O N T H E M O U N TA I N
bear turn and stand over me, its face itself. The attack had lasted only a
not 10 centimetres from mine. But I couple of minutes, but the next five
could see that the full force of my head- hours of getting back to the car would
torch was beaming it straight in the come to feel like utter torture.
eyes. It almost looked confused, as if it We swiftly paced through the woods
couldn’t see where the screaming was with me now taking the lead as I was
coming from. After what was probably worried my wounded leg might leave
only a second, even though it felt like me trailing too far behind. Every time
an hour, the bear walked straight over I squeezed through the dense pine
my head and hurried off into the trees. tree branches, I was almost sick with
I got up immediately and ran fear that I would see those green lit-up
towards Nick. I couldn’t believe my leg eyes again on the other side. What had
was working! I could see utter terror in seemed like a short trek through the
his face. “It got me, it got my leg. What woods on the way in, felt like eternity
now. But it had only been 20 minutes.
It was almost euphoria that I felt
when we reached our crampons and
I WAS SICK WITH ice axes; at least we would now be
FEAR THAT I WOULD able to semi-defend ourselves, or so
SEE THE BEAR’S GREEN we naively thought.
As we had been the ones to make
LIT-UP EYES AGAIN.
the first new tracks through the deep
snow in the woods earlier that day,
we just continued to follow the deep
do we do, what do we do?” All I wanted well-trodden trail onwards.
to do was run in the opposite direction, Whether it was through utter fear,
away from the direction the bear had adrenaline or just the will to live, we
gone. But there was no way down that had totally forgotten how long it had
way. We had to get back to the climbing taken us earlier to get to this point
ropes that we’d left for our return at from where we’d left our climbing
the top of the second rock wall we’d ropes. There were a few times I said to
climbed earlier in the day. We had no Nick that I didn’t think it was our trail.
choice but to go back into the woods. But it had to be as there had been no
“We just keep going,” Nick replied, other human tracks there earlier that
“we have to keep going!” So I followed day. As I was noticeably losing a lot
him into the dense forest, looking over of blood, we just kept going. We both
my shoulder the whole time. knew we had to push on and get back
What was to come was probably to the car as swiftly as possible.
scarier for me than the actual attack We came into a clearing out of
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the woods and the snow firmed up find our original trail. That meant
underfoot. The tracks then went from going directly back towards where
deep snow sinkholes that looked like the attack had happened. Once more,
human footprints to perfect huge paw I felt like being sick.
prints in the hard crusty slope that led Again not thinking, I just moved
into the darkness. off the way we had come, teetering
“We’re following a flipping bear!” above the cliff. This is when all the
I shouted to Nick. snow underfoot gave way and I was
This is when the fear I didn’t think left scrabbling to stop myself from
could get any worse took a diving plummeting over the edge into the
plunge and I almost fainted. I looked darkness. I knew shock was messing
downhill. I thought I could see the with my head and decision-making,
ridgeline that we had climbed before and I think Nick realized this too, as he
leaving our ropes, so without a second politely took charge of the situation.
thought, I turned and sprinted down. He suggested we put our crampons on
This was a stupid idea, as the snow was and scrabble back up the rock slabs to
just a layer on top of steep slabs of rock, reach where we left the main trail and
and I started to slide uncontrollably take it from there.
over the rocks to the edge of the For over an hour we reversed
looming cliff. Thankfully, I stopped our steps. We couldn’t believe we
just shy of the edge. As I was now out had gone so far off the track. Every
on a pinnacle, I could see the cliff went
off into the distance on both sides. We
weren’t in the right place at all!
“Shhhhh,” I hushed at Nick, who AS WE REVERSED OUR
had descended the slope to join me. STEPS, EVERY OTHER
“Listen! I can hear it walking above
FOOTPRINT WAS DYED
the cliff!” I was petrified; I was certain
I could hear the bear moving in on A DEEP BLOOD RED.
us. I felt dizzy, probably from losing a
lot of blood, but mostly from fear. Nick
reassured me it was just the waterfall other footprint I retraced was dyed a
spitting off the cliff below me that deep, blood red.
I could hear. I realized he was right, I was feeling weaker with every step.
but I was still too scared and shocked I even suggested climbing a big tree
to think properly. and waiting until daylight, but Nick
We decided that the only way to find pointed out that this wasn’t the best
our ropes was to retrace our tracks to idea and we pushed on. Eventually we
the crampon and axe stash and then found our original tracks. There were

fresh bear tracks all around, but then either side of us; then out of the dark
we saw our ropes piled beside the we heard the gut-wrenching howl of a
big tree we were going to abseil from wolf pack in the valley below.
[use ropes to climb down a vertical Any other time I would have been
surface] and we just went straight to on cloud nine. I love wolves, and bears
them without a second thought. for that matter, and my dream is to see
All the time we had been shouting, a wolf in the wild, but not that night.
screaming and howling at the top I tried to put it out of my head as I
of our lungs to ward off any other rappelled down to the snowy slope
prowling eyes that lurked in the below. After Nick had come down
woods. As we reached the ropes, Nick whooping and yelling, we continued
stopped his current throat-shredding to the top of the next rock band and
howl to help me sort the gear. There I set the ropes for our second abseil.
was a split second where there was We were abseiling dow n the
no sound to be heard in the whole unfrozen icefall that we had wanted
valley that stretched for kilometres to to climb earlier that day, which is
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a well-travelled route when it is in the time we started the 140-kilometre

the right condition. But it was very drive back to Banff, Alberta, and we
much just running water that day. I reached the hospital around 3 a.m. A
went first but couldn’t find the belay nurse asked what had happened, and
bolts in the rock to re-rig our ropes. I almost laughed when I told her that I
So I ended up hanging from the rock had been attacked by a bear. She didn’t
face, and clipping my climbing gear look so amused though. As I relaxed
into a crack in the face itself to hold on to the blue, cold, clean bed, I could
me safe. This freed the rope, allowing have burst into tears. I was finally
Nick to come down to find the bolts. safe. The wound in my leg was the
The abseil took longer than it should doctor’s problem.
have, but hanging there in the middle After X-rays, 40-plus stitches and
of the huge face, attached only to two wound irrigation, I got out of hospital
small pieces of climbing gear in a tiny around noon the following day, and
crack, I had never felt so safe in all my made my way back to a friend’s house
life. Nothing could reach me there. I in nearby Canmore. After another
almost hoped Nick would drop the couple of days of leg-up, painkiller-
ropes by accident so that we didn’t fuelled blurriness, I eventually got to
have to continue down to where fly home to Scotland.
animals might be lurking.
My leg was now really hurting, and Greg has since climbed routes in Tibet
as the adrenaline started to wear off, and Newfoundland. He also returned
my frightened, rushed stride slowed from a trip in Alberta earlier this year,
to a determined hobble. We eventually close to the site of the bear attack. “The
reached the road and then the Jeep, experience is always there if I’m
and as Nick put his bag and gear in honest,” he says, “but to continue doing
the car, I dropped my backpack in something I love I have to put
the trunk, got in the back seat and myself in this kind of situation
locked the door. It was 12:45 a.m. by and work with it.”
FROM GREGBOSWELL.CO.UK (2 FEBRUARY 2016), COPYRIGHT © 2016 BY GREG BOSWELL
ABOUT THAT PREBOARDING RUSH
Everyone who lined up 30 minutes early to board the plane

is gonna be so mad when we all land at the same time.
@MS GW EN I

Giving a gift unwraps long-lost memories
The
Christmas
Guitar BY J EA N CHAVOT
M
Y SON WAS ABOUT of a wild guitar to tame. We went
to turn 10. He still into the shop.
took my hand Years earlier, when he wasn’t even a
from time to time year old, we used to sing a few notes
when we were out together, but he to him each morning to see whether
let it go when we met other children, he was awake. I say “we” but it was
especially girls. On that late afternoon actually his mother, with her beautiful
in winter we had strolled through the singer’s voice. He responded with the
Parisian streets illuminated bright as same little melody. It became a game
day with Christmas lights. Dirty snow to vary it, make it more intricate and ILLUSTRATION BY BODIL JANE/FOLIO ART
beneath our feet, we came to a halt in to hear him reproduce it right away
front of the music shop window, his before breaking into his delightful
small hand tucked cosily in mine. rippling laugh. It was his way of
We looked at the guitars gleaming saying, “Again! Again!”
on their stands. Their long necks When he was older, we asked
decked with tinsel made them look him from time to time if he wanted
like ostriches tied up with ribbon to learn to play an instrument. As
(some people have no respect for musicians ourselves, nothing seemed
musical instruments or for animals). more natural, given—and I say this as
These pathetic-looking creatures were objectively as possible for a parent—
ruled out straightaway; my son dreamt his obvious talent. He consistently

T H E C H R I S T M A S G U I TA R
responded with a clear and definite no. “You want to learn piano?”
When I asked why, he told me that he “No, guitar.”
didn’t want “to end up being forced to “Just like Dad?”
play in front of 300 people”. “No,” he replied, a touch of disdain
He had been to many of his mother’s in his voice.
and my performances. I wondered “Why guitar then and not piano?”
whether he had been upset by the “Because I like the physical connec-
shows where we were especially bad, tion with the instrument.”
whether stage fright was contagious His mother and I looked at each
or whether his hypersensitivity meant other. We weren’t used to hearing
he’d been put off by that level of language
seeing us go through from him. He didn’t say
it? Or could it be that any more about it that
With a nod,
scales, singing exercises day but we hoped we’d
and rehearsals were, in I referred the understood. I bought
his mind, just a typical salesman to him a guitar and at his
adult occupation—a my son. He was request we enrolled him
way of earning a living? the customer. at music school.
Or did he have another While he appreciated
good reason that it classical guitarists
would be useless to try Fernando Sor and Heitor
to explain to someone with the limited Villa-Lobos, it was only natural that
understanding of a grown-up ? very soon he wanted to play music
Fo r t u n a t e l y , h e h a d a l i t t l e closer to his own taste, on a guitar
classmate at school who was taking that he’d chosen himself, with which
piano lessons and played ‘The Pink he could develop the perfect “physical
Panther’ divinely. My son immediately connection”. It was in pursuit of this
learnt it by heart, having taken notice ideal instrument that we went into the
for the first time of our home piano. music shop on that Christmas Eve.
For many weeks he played the tune A salesman greeted us as though he
in every pitch and every key, with his were condescending to attend to us
head down, eyes closed ... between a Rolling Stones tour and a
One day, to our great relief, perhaps session with Charlie Parker. He ad-
because he had exhausted all possible dressed his remarks to me alone, as the
variations, he declared bluntly, “I want debit cardholder. With a nod, I referred
to learn to play an instrument.” him to my son. He was the customer.
“Good,” we said, just as straight- The salesman took that to mean that
forwardly, afraid he would change I knew nothing at all about guitars and
his mind. that, obviously, the boy didn’t either.

He brought out a guitar that was little beginner’s guitar. I loved it from
“super for solos”, as he put it, then the first note. It sounded terrific.
another encrusted with mother-of- My son returned from the back
pearl, then all the rubbishy expen- of the shop, carrying a folk guitar.
sive guitars that he hadn’t succeeded It was definitely the right one. The
in flogging. My son couldn’t see one salesman tried to talk him into a
he wanted. He was too timid to play more expensive model by giving him a
in front of strangers. He asked, “Can flashy demonstration. We had to hold
I look on my own?” Disgusted that back our laughter when he massacred
suckers like us were making such a the intro to ‘Stairway to Heaven’. Then
fuss, the salesman let him head into my son said, “Let’s go, Dad!”
the depths of the shop. The salesman brought the guitar to
As I waited, I thought back to the till. My son picked out a few notes,
my very first guitar. I’d have liked one ear pressed to the body of the
my father to come to the music instrument. He made a face.
shop with me, but he had decided “That’s not mine.”
that I should go and choose it with “Yes, it is. It’s the same model,” the
our neighbours’ son. Michel was his salesman assured him.
name. His parents were devastated “It’s not his,” I said.
that he wanted to give up studying The salesman headed back to the
medicine to become a guitar player, stockroom. He returned with the folk
and he felt so conflicted that he didn’t guitar. My son picked out a few notes.
know what to do any more. He smiled at me.
My father had helped Michel follow
his passion and also intervened to ON CHRISTMAS DAY, he took his guitar
reassure his family. It was a big thing from beneath the tree, unwrapped
for him to do. Admirable. But I knew it and handed it immediately to my
one thing for sure: My father would father—eager for his verdict. With
never have let me give up my studies the solemn intensity of an expert, his
to follow my heart. I hated Michel with grandfather played some slow chords
a fierce and dark envy. and long arpeggios.
I arrived a quarter of an hour late to “This little guitar sounds terrific.”
meet up with him to buy the instru- “It’s me who chose it all by myself!”
ment. He had already left, or, more my son pointed out.
likely, he had never turned up. No “Well done, my lad, I’m proud of
way was I going home empty-handed! you,” said my father.
I chose my guitar all by myself. When We sat down to Christmas dinner.
I got home there was a terrible scene. That year the turkey tasted even better
Who did I think I was? It was a cheap than usual.

Beware!
He Wants
To Break
Your Heart
&Your Bank BY ELEANOR ROSE
I L LU ST RAT I O N BY J OH N R I T T E R

B E WA R E ! H E WA N T S T O B R E A K YO U R H E A R T & YO U R B A N K
O
N A FROSTY JANUARY AFTERNOON, Lis Daugaard’s
tummy fluttered as she waited in arrivals at the
Copenhagen airport. Dressed in her best, the
65-year-old searched among the disembarking
passengers for Robert Aleksander’s face. They had
met on a dating site and, after two months of exchanging emails
and phone calls, this would be their first real-life encounter.
After the crowd thinned to nothing, Lis still stood there waiting.
Where was the man from the photographs—grey-haired, handsome,
with a shy smile? On her way home, the tears began to flow. “I had to
call my daughter and say: ‘I think I’ve made a big mistake,’” she says.
Lis’s romance began on a popular (more than `10 lakhs), including the
Danish site, dating.dk, shortly after she cost for a visit to her in Copenhagen.
retired back in 2013. Her husband had Now, when he failed to arrive, Lis was
died 10 years earlier and until now she stunned. “How could a woman of my
had been too busy rais- background, working all
ing four kids and pur- over Europe, get taken in
suing an international It is hard to like this?” she asks.
career with the Cham- Police are worried
ber of Industry and
know the scale about cases like Lis’s
Commerce in Leipzig, of the problem because many are car-
Germany, (living on as many ried out by international,
the Continent for some organized crime gangs,
years) to look for love.
people are too operating behind the
When she posted her embarrassed shield of a computer in
profile, Robert Alek- to report Nigeria, Malaysia or Is-
sander—who claimed rael, far beyond the reach
to be an EU diplomat—
the crime. of local law enforcement.
pinged into her inbox The Danish force issued a
almost immediately. stark public warning, as have forces
As the relationship blossomed, in Germany, France, Canada and
his emails became increasingly ro- the US. “The person you are com-
mantic. So when he said he needed a municating with is not necessarily the
loan for travel, Lis didn’t hesitate. She person they say they are,” Danish
wired him her savings of 94,000 krone police told hopeful daters.

Lis Daugaard was set to enjoy her retirement until she was left broke by a romance scam.
Crime statistics show complaints since romance scams not only empty
of romance scams rising as much as bank accounts—they also bring a
20 per cent in a year in some countries, lasting sense of shame.
such as in the US where the FBI reports But romance scams aren’t the
that most victims are women over 40 only way that networks of fraudsters
who are divorced, widowed and/or worldwide increasingly target older
disabled. The FBI reports that in the people, according to Europol, the
US in 2016, it received close to 15,000 EU’s law enforcement agency. Groups
P H OTO : © GR EG E RS OV E RVA D
complaints of romance scams—nearly of criminals use ‘social engineering’

2,500 more than the previous year, fraud to tease out a potential victims’
with victims losing a total of more than confidential information and cash. It
$230 million. The UK’s police unit is carried out online, through email
Action Fraud said more than 3,500 (‘phishing ’) or social networks,
people lost £41 million to romance as well as by phone (‘vishing’). In
scams in Britain in 2017 alone. Such Sweden, the UK and Belgium, police
figures are likely the tip of the iceberg, recently warned of a hoax where a

scammer calls a victim pretending crime) has identified 3,00,000 targets’

to be a detective. The ‘cop’ tells them names since 2012. Other scammers
that scammers have accessed their simply trawl Facebook in search of
bank account. They promise to help older people, explains Depuydt—or
if the victim entrusts them with their put out phony ads on social media.
bank details. Age UK, the largest British charity
“It’s well-organized,” says Peter for older people, puts the rise in elder
Depuydt, project manager for fraud at scams down partly to the fact that
Europol. “They have people to launder more over-50s are online now than
the money, people to open bank ever before. People are also living
accounts and call centres to swindle longer, many with conditions such
people.” They can even steal the phone as cognitive decline. “We get calls
numbers of financial institutions consistently from relatives saying
(known as ‘spoofing’). they’re worried about Mum or Dad in
It is hard to know the scale of their 70s or 80s. In some cases they’re
the problem since many are too particularly concerned because
embarrassed to report such scams, says they’re dealing with dementia or
Depuydt. But, he adds: “We believe memory loss,” says policy manager
the number’s rising, because elders Phil Mawhinney.
are such easy targets.” British police One scam has recently targeted
unit Action Fraud reported that more particularly frail elders in a small
than 92,000 scam complaints between town in Belgium. Leopold (not his real
October 2016 and September 2017 name), now 92, was driving into the
came from people age 50 and over— town one day in June 2016. When he
making up 55 per cent of victims. In got out of his car, a man approached
North Rhine Westphalia, the most and told him he had hit his car and
populous region of Germany, police broken his wing mirror. He showed
said they dealt with 1,250 cases of fraud him the big, black scratch. The man
in 2016 that cheated elderly people of suggested that Leopold shouldn’t
€8 million in total—and by August last call his insurer, since he was old and
year, the figure for 2017 was already might lose his insurance. Instead, on
higher than that. the spot he called a ‘repair man’, who
Criminals trade ‘sucker lists’ of told him the mirror would cost €2,500
easy targets—those who have already to replace. He then took Leopold
fallen for a scam, the majority of to a bank where he withdrew €900.
them pensioners. In the UK alone His daughter Jicky, who spoke to
the government’s National Trading Reader’s Digest on behalf of her
Standards office (that protects father since he was too frightened,
consumers and businesses from said: “Dad told us he felt threatened
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when the guy raised his voice.” After brokers about what investments were
the man left, Leopold drove home to out there, I didn’t question him,” says
call his daughters, and on their urging Leonie. After they chatted on the
reported the crime to police the phone, she bought a bond for £50,000
next day. The scammers were never and started receiving monthly interest
caught. But, says Jicky, the impact has payments of £500, which convinced
been serious and long-lasting. “Now her the investment was real. After
my father is always worried,” she says. a couple of months, Forbes offered
Other hoaxes have the potential for more investments. “I decided to
much larger losses, with investment buy into one. Then I could see the
scams known to be returns on the monthly
particularly damaging. statement I was getting,
Leonie Morris, 52, from “These allegedly from Cater
Cumbria in England, Allen, so I invested
was recently victim of
investment more—to the tune of
a highly sophisticated scams are nearly £400,000,” says
i n v e s t m e n t s c h e m e. damaging. Leonie.
At the time, Leonie, a One day, shortly after
former business coach—
It is at the end Christmas 2017, she got
who has worked with of people’s a call from her bank.
big international firms career, and they “They said one of the
such as Tesco Global— investment payments
was looking for ward
lose a lot.” had gone through a
t o e a r l y re t i re m e n t , banking clearing house
planning to fund it and was showing some
by carefully investing her recent red flags,” she explains; that
divorce settlement. Researching something didn’t look right. They
investments, she found a website couldn’t give details, but told her
that seemed to belong to the to call her broker. It then occurred
respected financial institution to her to dial the number for Cater
Santander’s private banking arm, Allen’s main switchboard, rather than
Cater Allen. Forbes’s direct line. “There’s nobody
She typed in her contact details here of that name,” said the woman’s
and received an email “from the voice down the phone. Leonie felt sick.
CEO” at an official-looking address. The bank website link, email and
She arranged a chat with a wealth number he called from had been
broker named Jonathan Forbes, who cloned—‘Jonathan Forbes’ was a
sent her his direct number. “Because fraudster living overseas. All her
I’d got a story similar to his from other money was gone.

Leonie came out of early retire- In September 2017, Italy’s Chamber

ment and has gone back to full-time of Deputies gave the go-ahead to
work. “It’s like being 18 again. I have a law that would introduce prison
to be really careful about what I sentences of two to six years for
buy and I can’t go on holiday,” scamming anyone over 65 years old.
she says. ‘Forbes’ is meanwhile The proposal, which would also allow
still out there—working under for fines of €400 to €3,000, must be
the same name, though claim- reviewed before it becomes law—but
ing to be from different banks. signalled Italy’s willingness to tackle
Leonie counts her blessings that she elder scams.
can still earn a living— The EU has ordered
but others are not so social media firms to
lucky. Europol’s Peter Older people— “take more responsi-
Depuydt says: “These bility” against scams
investment scams are many of whom and ordered Facebook,
damaging. It is at the are isolated, Google and Twitter to
end of people’s career, alone and remove hoax listings or
and they lose a lot.” face “enforcement ac-
Progress is being vulnerable—are tion”. Dupuydt said the
made in some coun- being robbed. EU’s police force is step-
tries as they grapple “Simply put, ping up efforts to raise
with scams running awareness of different
rampant. In Britain, the it’s terrifying.” scams through a series
watchdog Payments of seminars and con-
Systems Regulator (PSR) ferences. Europol aims
called on banks urgently to help prevent ultimately to dismantle organized
scams after about 19,000 people lost gangs that carry out the scams. A
more than a £100 million in the first recent bust saw 20 people arrested in
six months of 2017 alone to ‘authorized a joint Europol operation with Italian
push payments scams’ (any swindle and Romanian police in March 2018;
where a person is tricked into making a they are accused of stealing €1 mil-
transfer to a legitimate-seeming payee lion by obtaining banking details from
who turns out to be a scammer). From hundreds of bank customers through
September this year, a new code will phishing emails. However, he said if
bring in better verification procedures victims don’t report the crime then
to make it harder for scammers to open Europol never gets the data and it
bank accounts, and easier for custom- “can’t do much”.
ers to verify that the person they are Organizations that care for elders,
paying is who they say they are. such as Sweden’s pensioners’ orga-
00
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2018 || READER’S
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DIGEST
nization SPF Seniorerna, believe the and manipulation that is at the core of
answer is raising awareness. “Informa- social engineering scams. Van Schaik
tion, information, information. It is the is passionate about the work because,
only thing that works,” says secretary as he says, “Older people are being
general Peter Sikstrom. Through more robbed. Simply put, it’s terrifying.”
than 800 branches across the country, In a society where older people often
SPF Seniorerna offers education ses- grow isolated and lonely, which can
sions and hands out leaflets to elders leave them more vulnerable to scams,
to put them on guard. it’s important to get connected. At the
Meanwhile, in Holland, Harry van end of his training sessions, Van Schaik
Schaik, a former police officer and tells elderly people attending that they
fraud specialist in Utrecht, trains must pass on their knowledge to others.
hundreds of elderly people there how “You must go out and talk to people,” he
to avoid scams. The people who take tells them, “and you will get energy back
Van Schaik’s training tell him that from it as well.”
they feel vulnerable partly because in It’s a sentiment echoed by Lis Dau-
Holland, they have been raised with gaard, who never got her cash back,
Christian values, such as trust, that despite years of trying to track down her
mean they can sometimes be naive. scammer. But she found purpose in the
He teaches them all his tricks to avoid months after her terrible romance scam
fraud—including that you should by finding and helping other victims.
simply avoid long conversations with She says it’s essential to start talking
somebody who shows up at your door openly. “We have to make people more
or calls you, as it is an opportunity for aware. It’s the only way to take the
a criminal to exercise the influence scammers’ market away.”
FELINE FACTS
The cat could very well be man’s best friend but
would never stoop to admitting it.
DOUG LARSON, columnist
As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.

E L L E N P E R RY B E R K E L E Y, a u t h o r
In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods;

they have never forgotten this.
T E R RY P R ATC H E T T, a u t h o r

Laughter
THE BEST MEDICINE
KNOWING THAT the pastor enjoyed and says to the cashier, “May I
his drink, a hotel owner offered him a have 50 Hanukkah stamps?”
case of cherry brandy for Christmas in “What denomination?” asks
exchange for a free ad in the church the cashier.
CARTOON BY HARLEY SCHWADRON
newsletter. The pastor agreed and ran Miriam thinks for a second,
this in the next issue: “The pastor then says, “Give me 6 Orthodox,
would like to thank Patrick Smith for 12 Conservative and 32 Reform.”
his kind gift of a crate of fruit and for jewishmag.com
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hotsermons.com CAR COMMERCIALS grossly over-
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MIRIAM GOES TO the post office to driving around in the desert.
buy stamps for her Hanukkah cards @TASTEFACTORY

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A FARMER WAS HELPING one

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noticed his four-year-old son
AN ENGLISH GRADUATE
standing at the fence, watching.
WALKS INTO A BAR …
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time to broach the whole birds-and- QTwo quotation marks walk
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IT’S A GOOD THING snakes and Reader’s Digest will pay for your funny
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wants a loyal snake. ROY BLOUNT or email: editor.india@rd.com

BY S HAM YA DAS GU PTA
I L LU STR AT I ON BY K E SH AV KA P IL
Anirudh Agarwal, the fearsome

character from Bollywood’s horror films,
is really a romantic at heart
woman can’t conceive. She is taken to a cavernous place

where a huge bat-like creature hangs from the wall.
Because, really, where else would you take her? Four sari-
clad women lie gyrating on the floor, forming an ‘X’. The young
woman, in a white sari like theirs, is dunked in some sort of liquid. A
chant begins, “Hoor-hoor-tak, hoor-hoor-tak”. The women are now
on their feet, dancing. Cue the appearance of a giant of a man through
the smoke. He’s borrowed Count Dracula’s cape. His face could well
have been carved out of stone, the jawline a thing of beauty. His hair
is plastered down. “Tumhe aulaad hogi [You will have a child],” the
man-creature’s voice booms.

The ‘patient’ seems hypnotized—as screen for the most part. Both films
you likely are by now. Soon, the chant- were made by the Ramsay brothers,
ing stops, the creature lies down next originally a brood of seven whose
to the now-unresponsive woman, co- formulaic horror factory became a
vers her with his cape and, we find out success story at the time. There were
later, makes sure she has her aulaad. many reasons why they became so big.
The movie is Bandh Darwaza. The Agarwal was one—a massive six-and-a-
man–creature’s character is Nevla. half-foot reason.
He is, to put it simply, pure evil. For “I didn’t look like a normal person.
aficionados of Indian horror cinema—a I just have a strange appearance”
curiously large number considering Agarwal was a godsend to the Ram-
the pitiful quality and volume of the says, who, before they cast him the first
genre—Nevla is the greatest ‘monster’ time in Purana Mandir (a 1984 run-
ever. Saamri, of Purana Mandir, is the away hit), had used amateurish horror-
other classic character. flick make-up and highly professional
The man playing both roles was masks to create their bad guys. Agarwal
Anirudh Agarwal, credited as Ajay on was—is—immense; not someone you
Anirudh Agarwal as Nevla in the A poster of the 1988 horror film Veerana
horror film Bandh Darwaza, 1990. by the Ramsay brothers

want to mess with and certainly not

stumble upon in a dark alley. “With me,
the Ramsays did not need any make-up.
Only a little. I looked like a monster any-
way,” says the retired actor, smiling.
Agarwal, now in his 60s, was born
in Dehradun and played mythical
characters in local plays growing up.
He studied at the University of Roorkee
[now IIT Roorkee] to become a civil
engineer. Work took him to Bombay,
where the acting bug is in the air. When
he was out of work for an extended
period due to health reasons, a good
(or not) Samaritan suggested he meet
the Ramsays for an acting gig. He
did. Purana Mandir was made, and
RI G HT P HOTO : M I L I N D S H E LTE
A poster for the 1984 film Purana Mandir;

Anirudh Agarwal (right) strikes a pose
the rest is Indian B-movie history. wanted to do something special, where

Agarwal made only three films I could put some effort and energy. But
with the Ramsays; the third being no one thought I could do anything. No
3D Saamri, an attempt to join the one wanted me as a normal man.”
emerging 3D jamboree of the time, He calls himself a romantic, dream-
as well as cash in on the popularity of ing about the kind of roles Rajesh
Saamri. Later he also appeared in the Khanna portrayed. But Agarwal is
Ramsays’ super-successful TV series, nothing if not self-aware. “But if you
Zee Horror Show. see me, it doesn’t go with every char-
His journey as an actor did not acter. If I had been five-foot-ten …” His
end there—nor did his career as enormous height was triggered by a
a civil engineer, he did well there, hormonal imbalance. Agarwal’s bitter-
running his own business. But, with ness with the way things turned out is
his unconventional looks, Agarwal evident, and while he continues to be
was typecast in the roles of the scary on cordial terms with the Ramsays, he
henchman. Or, on one occasion, the regrets playing Saamri and Nevla.
main bad guy, Babu Gujjar, in Shekhar That said, he has moved on. A
Kapur’s Bandit Queen. “That was a family man, Agarwal is a part of the
good role. I fit the character perfectly, community in Mumbai’s Andheri West,
and the character fit me,” recalls doing his bit in religious festivals, a
Agarwal. It was also, perhaps, the only spot of social work here and there,
time he got to show off his acting chops. leading a retired life and visiting his
children sometimes. “Some people get
I
t took me years to live down scared when they see me, but I am a
Dracula and convince the film very normal man. I think this is India—
producers that I could play almost where appearances matter. The first
any other type of role,” said Bela Lugosi impression is that there is something
once. On another occasion he said, wrong with me. It’s human nature.”
“I’d like to quit the supernatural roles Actors like Lugosi, or Boris Karloff or
and play just an interesting, down-to- Christopher Lee, they became icons,
earth person.” Lugosi, the Hungarian– luminaries. “The monster was the best
American actor synonymous with friend I ever had,” Karloff said in an in-
Count Dracula, could well have been terview once. Known for playing Fran-
speaking for Agarwal there. kenstein’s monster in more than one
Now happily settled in Mumbai with film, he has two stars on Hollywood’s
his wife Neelam, and their son and Walk of Fame. Not bad, you’d say.
daughter both in America, Agarwal Why is it so difficult for Agarwal
says he never watches his films, to come to terms with the fact that
“Mazaa nahin aata hai [It’s no fun]. I he is, perhaps, India’s Karloff, or
00
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DIGEST
DIGEST
Anirudh Agarwal, with his wife Neelam and son Aseem earlier this year.
Lugosi? His argument is a fair one: benefits with his doting family.
“In Hollywood, they make big budget A life mostly spent with Neelam, the
films. Even horror films. As an actor, one real romance in his world. “She’s
you can keep making films like that. from Saharanpur. I’m from a village
Here, people think in terms of heroes near Dehradun. Ours was an arranged
and villains. There, they could do that marriage, so we never saw each other
sort of role their entire lives. I could before getting married. The parents
never have made a living playing the discussed it, and both of us said yes.
monster.” Had there been a career in Alag zamana tha [times were different].”
it, he “would have accepted it”. “But Lost in the crowd, though standing
there weren’t many monster roles for out still. Never quite reconciled with
me after the Ramsays stopped making the monster’s role and no real chance
COURTESY: ANIRUDH AGGARWA L
films. So I was stranded.” at interesting and challenging roles

“If he walked on the street, people either. Certainly not your man-next-
would turn around and look at door. Agarwal’s career in films may be
him. That’s what his face was like,” tinged with regrets, but if there was a
director Shyam Ramsay says, perhaps stock-taking of Indian cinema—beyond
uncharitably, though not unfairly. Off the stars and big films—there would be
camera, Agarwal is gentle, polite and a Walk of Fame Star for the man who
affectionate. He made a success of played Nevla and Saamri—the greatest
his business, and is now reaping its monsters in Indian cinema.

Paul Fox on his view
from the cockpit:
“These are power
station chimneys at
dawn, Yorkshire,
England. The thick
fog is often only a
few metres deep.”

Photographs from the flight deck
are simply out of this world
Seat With
a
Vıew
BY DAV I D TH OM AS
PH OTO GR AP HS BY PAU L F OX

S E AT W I T H A V I E W
W
hen Paul Fox was a small
boy, the pilot on a holiday
flight to Corfu let him
come and see the cockpit. “It was a
wonderful experience and it really
gave me the bug for flying,” he says.
Now, at the age of 46, he is an airline
pilot, with the rank of Captain. Long a “You see phenomenal
keen photographer, he started taking arrays of wind turbines
pictures from the flight deck, “out of in the North Sea and on
frustration that other people can’t see mountains in Spain.
the views that we can. These are in the Irish Sea,
“I get amazing 180-degree vision off the North Wales coast.”
and the clarity is something else. At
least once or twice a month there’s a
view, often a sunrise or sunset, that’s
absolutely breathtaking.”
So when the aircraft is on autopilot
and his First Officer is at the controls
(pictured below), Fox takes out his
Nikon camera and captures images
such as the striking shots on these
pages. The passengers are in no
danger at all, he explains reassuringly.
Aircraft are at their safest when run
by computers.
“In some of the worst
conditions, we’re not
allowed to fly the plane
manually,” Fox adds,
pointing out that airliners
A L L P HOTO GR A P HS : PAU L FOX
could not fly as close to

one another, as the picture
overleaf shows, if human
beings were trying to keep
them exactly the right
distance apart.
Fox was born to be a
pilot. Both his parents

served in the United Kingdom’s I was long-sighted, so they would
Royal Air Force and within days of his never accept me. It was only much
birth he made his first flight from later that I realized I could still fly
England to Germany, where his father commercial aircraft.”
was stationed. He began his working life as a lawyer,
“I was in the Air Cadets as a boy. I but it wasn’t for him. A spell as a guide
flew gliders and Chipmunk [a two- for a tour company followed, leading
seater, single-engined aircraft] train- travellers on safari in Tanzania and on
ing planes. I passionately wanted to walks through the Central Asian
join the Air Force and fly fast jets, but mountains of Kyrgyzstan.

“London at night. My
favourite city from the air
is Paris, though the route
into Rome’s Ciampino
Airport takes you over
the Vatican—stunning!”
“The nearer plane is 1,000 ft

(305 m) below mine and the
next one is 1,000 ft below that.
We’re on the Tango 16 flight
path south to Tenerife, Spain.”
Fox finally took to the air as a bush through deep snow and standing on
pilot in Botswana: “It’s the hidden gem the summit of Everest.”
of Africa. Flying there taught me to In 2015 he was actually on the
cope with all sorts of conditions, from North Face of Everest when a devas-
thunderstorms to sandstorms. It was tating earthquake struck Nepal, forc-
glorious and the wildlife was spectacu- ing the climb to be abandoned.
lar.” Eventually, the time came to grow Undaunted, he returned in 2017
up and get a steady job as an airline and made it to the top. Yet, Fox
pilot. But the love of adventure never admits, “When we got to the summit
left him. Fox’s other lifelong passion is we were in the middle of a snowstorm,
mountaineering. “For years I had a and there was no view. It was the
recurring dream about plodding ultimate irony.”

“Lake Annecy in
France, with the
Alps in the back-
ground, en route
to Turin, Italy.
Mont Blanc and
the Matterhorn
look spectacular
from the air.”

Home, But
Not Alone
The SOS Children’s Villages International continue
to bring hope to orphaned kids around the world
BY SA NGH AM I TR A CH AK RA BORT Y

Morning assembly at an
SOS village in India.
D
RIVING THROUGH THE brings warmth and grace to their cosy
bumpy dust tracks that home. The aroma of delicious sambar
were once the badlands wafts in from the kitchen, where, at a
of Faridabad, I finally glance, I notice steel bowls arranged
arrive at a gate behind neatly in a pyramid. The walls of the
which lies an extraordinary village. It living room bear a cluster of photo-
is a relief to escape the blinding mid- graphs—of children mostly, of vary-
summer sun over Greenfields and ing ages, and an elderly gentleman
enter the house, where Molly Mathew they all call Papaji (see box, p 119).
and her five children live. Molly, 56, has an infectious smile that
Their living room is dark, cool and spreads around the room quickly.
neatly decorated—there’s a TV in one Some of the kids step forward to say
corner and a personal computer next namaste; others, a trifle shy, silently
to it; the sofas are lined with lace that clutch on to their mummy’s dupatta.

Molly used to be a nun in Kerala 22 states where over 26,000 chil-
years ago, before she decided to dren are being cared for annually.
move here. The children—born to a With the number of parentless and
lesser god—were either orphaned or abandoned children expected to
abandoned, and ended up alone in grow from 20 million to 24 million
the world. It was the SOS village that by 2021 in India, SOS villages have an
brought them together. This is the increasingly crucial role. But it
space where Meenu*, Baby, Rini, Indu all began in Imst, a village in the
and their brother Romit feel loved and Tyrolean region of Austria, way back
safe. The only place they know they in 1949.
can call their own.
PHOTO COURTESY: SOS CHILDREN’S VILLAGES INTERNATIONAL

A
The SOS villages’ goal is simple yet lberschwende, a sleepy
powerful: “When a child loses every- village tucked away in the
thing, SOS Children’s Villages Inter- rolling Alpine foothills of the
national is there to give them a fa- Vorarlberg province of Austria, is
mily and a home. We raise orphaned where Hermann Gmeiner was born.
and abandoned children and provide He was the seventh of eight children
them with all the things a normal fa- of a poor farmer couple. And before
mily would: food, clothing, education, he could get to know what a mother’s
medical care, but, most of all, hope.” love meant, at the tender age of four,
SOS International has been nurtu- he lost her. Hermann was a bright
ring children, the world over—87,100 boy and attended the local grammar
orphaned and abandoned chil- school. He earned money by serving
dren in 572 villages spread across as an altar boy and a tutor. His elder
135 countries—for almost 70 years. sister Elsa became a kind of foster
In India there are 32 villages in mother to him and brought him up
with love and compassion.
*Children's names changed upon request In 1939 at the onset of the Second

(Opposite page) A file photo of Hermann Gmeiner with children from SOS villages;
(this page) Molly Mathew with her children in Faridabad
World War, Gmeiner was enlisted After his military stint, even though
by the Germans and dispatched to Gmeiner had enrolled himself for medi-
the Russian front as a soldier for six cal studies, his strong desire to bring
years. Once, when Gmeiner was faced hope to orphans compelled him to give
ABOVE AND PREVIOUS SPREAD PHOTOS COURTESY: SOS CHILDREN’S VILLAGES OF INDIA
with a Russian soldier who was about it all up. He started a home for children
to shoot him, a seven-year-old local with $42 in his pocket and donations
peasant boy saved him by yanking from a few fellow Austrians. The rest is
the assaulter’s arm. In a significant chapter in the
1962, in an interview history of giving. Gmeiner,
to The New Yorker, down the years, inspired
Gmeiner said he had generations of children all
decided to repay the
Gmeiner decided over the world who feel
boy by helping the to repay the boy blessed to have been part
world’s children. who saved his life of the SOS family and are
By the time the war now paying it forward by
e n d e d , t h e re w e re by helping the changing lives themselves.
thousands of orphaned world’s children. Dr Muruga Sirigere, 34, is
children all over one such ‘child’.
Europe. Their misery
F
and deprivation had left a deep gash ive-year-old Muruga came to
in young Gmeiner’s heart. There were the Bangalore SOS village along
also large numbers of women who with his brother in December
had lost their families in the war. Re- 1989. Born to a labourer and an agar-
membering his sister’s role in his life, batti-maker, he was brought up under
and his own desire to help children, unspeakable hardship.
Gmeiner came up with an idea that is “Then my father died suddenly,
the cornerstone of the philosophy that leaving my mother with the task of
SOS villages are built on. bringing up five kids. Life in our Madi-

(From left) Sirigere with his award; treating sick children
wala shanty got tougher.” The abiding models today. He shared the award
memory of his early SOS village days with Maria Anggelina, from Indone-
is the “love, care and affection” of his sia, an activist fighting human traf-
village mother M. C. Girijamma. In ficking—they were chosen from eight
fact, growing up in this new environ- finalists out of 71 nominees across
ment, he no longer had any worries. 30 countries. “Whatever I am today,
“All I had to do was study—everything it is because of my SOS family. I am
else was taken care of,” he says. thrilled with the award, but it also
Always a bright student, Muruga means more responsibility,” he adds.
breezed through school, got an oppor- Married earlier this year, Sirigere
tunity to go to high school sounds content with
in Canada, returned to life. “What more could
India and attended medi- I ask for, I have a large
cal school in Mysuru. family—my [SOS]
As a doctor, he now Sirigere remains mother lives in Chitra-
works with children durga, and my broth-
with special needs, closely bonded ers and sisters have
especially those with with his settled down around
cerebral palsy, Down’s SOS brothers Bengaluru—and all PHOTOS COURTESY: MURUGA SIRIGERE
syndrome, and speech of us remain closely

and hearing impediments. and sisters. bonded.” Sirigere of-
“My main inspiration is ten returns to the SOS
Dr Gmeiner—like him, village where he grew
I wanted to work with children up and where he is sponsoring a child.
because I love them,” says Sirigere.
I
This year Sirigere was awarded the f S i r i g e r e h a s made India
biannual Hermann Gmeiner Award, proud by ser ving needy chil-
given to men and women who were dren, Tulsi Parihar, 59, has the
cared for in SOS villages and are role distinction of being the longest-

LEADERS SPEAK
J. N. Kaul, widely known as ‘Papaji’,

was the third president of SOS India.
His son Mr Siddharth Kaul, now the
global president of the
SOS Children’s Villages
Parihar with her children in the
International, speaks on
Bhimtal village in Garhwal
the organization’s role
today: “When the orga-
nization was created
serving SOS mother worldwide. At 22, [after WWII], there was Siddharth
when her husband suddenly died, hope for a new world Kaul
she was left alone with a baby girl of peace and harmony.
aged two. Hearing about SOS villages, Unfortunately, this has not been
she visited Greenfields in Faridabad realized. SOS International today is
called upon to provide care and fight
with her father and fell in love with for the rights of children who are
the idea that powered the institution. traumatized and displaced by wars.
Having joined the Bhimtal village in For example, in Syria and Iraq, we
Garhwal, she has mothered 19 girls run special mental health-care
and 17 boys in the past 34 years. Set programmes for children and adults
who are severely distressed, feel re-
to retire next year, Parihar looks back
jected and see society in a negative
with great fulfilment. “I don’t know manner. In all kinds of adverse situa-
how my life has passed. I was busy tions, we strive to restore children
with the children, and never got the to stable environments because we
PHOTO COURTESY: SOS CHILDREN’S VILLAGES OF INDIA
chance to worry about myself,” she believe that every child needs to
says. Her biological child grew up grow with love, respect and security.”
But, Mr S. Sandilya, SOS India’s
with those in the SOS village. “No
president, reminds us
one could tell she was born to me. that all of this is possi-
For me, all my children are the same,” ble only through the
she laughs. generosity of multiple
Looking at Parihar, Sirigere, Molly stakeholders. “SOS
Mathew and their ever-expanding India has to become
S. Sandilya 100 per cent self-
families you can see that Gmeiner’s
reliant by 2020, which
dream has come true. The Mathew is daunting. Hence we need the
family eats together, squabbles some- support of governments, corpo-
times, celebrates Diwali and Christ- rates, institutions and individual
mas, fights over the TV remote, but donors across the country.”
loves each other to bits. Just like any For donations and queries visit
www.soschildrensvillages.in
other Indian family.

Scent
of a
Woman How finding the perfect
perfume turned out to be an
act of self-affirmation
BY KATH ER I NE LA ID LAW
F ROM T HE GLOBE A ND MAI L
ILLUSTR ATI O N BY A LANN A C AVANAG H
WHEN I WAS A CHILD, I sat on my untrained to understand. But I knew

parents’ paisley bedspread and stared even then that they were symbols
at the kaleidoscopic bottles of perfume of glamour, subtle ways to send signals
arranged on my mother’s dresser. in the night.
They cast rainbows around the room As I got older, I began to experiment.
in the right light, and I was I saved up my allowance and, like
mesmerized. Less appealing were the so many kids of the 1990s, spent it
scents themselves—combinations of on travel-sized silver bottles of
chemicals my young nose was too Gap Dream and Gap Heaven. As a

SCENT OF A WOMAN
teenager, my parents gave me Ralph by test results knows, however, the

Ralph Lauren, because for some reason unknown is an excruciating place to be
I wanted to smell like a tangerine stuck. For a month this spring, I
putridly close to expiring. To no one’s wandered around, paid more attention,
surprise, the attention I most often noticed better, wondered if I had
caught was that of wasps at cancer. As the weather turned warmer,
summertime barbecues. Later, I’d wear the sky seemed the bluest of blue. I sat
Chloé by Chloé, hoping in an awkward on a park bench beside a man rabidly
phase that it would flirt for me, and scratching at a pile of lotto tickets, and
because my boyfriend at the time liked I wished for a little bit of that kind
it. And then there was Philosophy’s of faith. Walking through the rain
Falling in Love, because one afternoon, I watched
I wanted so badly to droplets fall into
be sweet to everyone puddles, unfurling into
I knew. endless ripples. That’s
None of them lasted. how cancer grows, I
And I realized, even- thought. But it’s how
tually, that every per- time passes too, if you’re
fume I’d ever worn was lucky, the cycles of life
an attempt to be some- growing wider and wider
thing for somebody else. until they fade away.
So I put them away.
My new perfume LIKE SO MANY moments
IT IS NOT COMMON that seem utterly trivial
knowledge that when you
helped me until they become pivot-
go into the hospital to to forget and to ally significant, I stopped
have pre-cancerous cells remember, to feel into a shop in April to
removed, you come out a little less afraid. buy a bottle of shampoo
smelling like rotten fish. as mine was running
The procedure leaves you low. After walking pur-
with a scent that hangs on posefully to the back of
for more than a week. It makes sense; the store and grabbing a white tube of
you go into an exam room to have a little the usual stuff, I browsed a little, which
part of you burnt away, and you come I almost never do. A bottle nearby stood
out smelling a little like a burn. It’s a out to me, a glass vial that looked like
lingering, acrid reminder in the days something out of an apothecary shop.
afterwards, the days during which It read ‘Replica’ in plain, blocky black
you’re not supposed to worry too much. type across the label. I’d never heard of
As anyone who has ever waited for the line, from the fashion house Maison

Martin Margiela. The accompanying unbridled smiles brought by memories

copy promised that the scent, Beach of my best-loved days. Like when my
Walk, would evoke a stroll on the beach dad would toss my sisters and me into
with its notes of salt air, coconut milk the ocean’s waves as my mum and
and bergamot, which seemed to me like brother watched from shore; the feeling
a lot to accomplish in just one whiff. of awe as I stood, a speck of a human,
Still, I picked it up and sprayed some facing a Pacific sunrise at daybreak; the
on my wrists. afterglow of a near-perfect afternoon
I spent the rest of the afternoon with spent holding hands for the first time
my wrists affixed to my face, like a with someone new.
scratch-and-sniff sticker, except the
sticker was me. It was the least perfumy IT SEEMS NATURAL, now, that such
perfume I’d ever worn, and I knew right a scent would find me eventually, after
away I should have it and wear it and be 32 years of wandering, and that it would
my best scratch-and-sniff self every day. be a musky smell like a romp in the
sand dunes, like unwashed, sun-baked
WHEN I WAS YOUNG, perfume was summer skin, my favourite kind. A
about transformation. But in the weeks month or so after that serendipitous
after my procedure, I learnt to value a moment in the shop, I ran into an ex.
scent’s ability to transport. As I swiped We got to talking about perfume.
it across my collarbones each morning, “I can’t smell it,” he said, as I held my
my new perfume helped me both to wrist up to his nose. But I could. I
forget and to remember, to feel a little smiled. After all, it wasn’t for him, and
less afraid. Gone was the burn, healing in my mind I was already in the sand
slowly, and in its place were the hundreds of kilometres away.
© 2018, KATHERINE LAIDLAW. FROM THE GLOBE AND MAIL (5 JULY 2018), THEGLOBEANDMAIL.COM
HOW SWEDE IS IT?

Pop quiz: Which of these three didn’t originate in Sweden?
1. The pop music group ABBA. 2. IKEA. 3. Swedish meatballs.
The answer came in this tweet from none other than the Swedish government:
“Swedish meatballs are actually based on a recipe King Charles XII brought
home from Turkey in the early 18th century. Let’s stick to the facts!”
The truth dismayed many Swedes, including one who tweeted in response,
“My whole life has been a lie.”

Got a health problem you don’t want
to talk about? Here’s help
JUST TOO
EMBARR AS S E D BY L IN A ZE LD OVI CH

A
LMOST EVERYONE has oral cavity,” says Winkel, and some emit
at some time experienced offensive-smelling gases.
an embarrassing health Mints, gums and most over-the-
problem—leaking urine, counter mouthwashes freshen your
profuse sweating or bad breath that taste, but don’t clear your breath.
won’t go away. Although not life “Taste has nothing to do with breath,”
threatening, such problems can affect says Winkel. “You can have a very
quality of life. What many don’t realize bad taste and very good breath or a
is that these issues can be cured or very good taste and very bad breath.”
managed. Yet people often feel too Consistent good ora l hyg iene is
self-conscious to speak to a doctor— impor ta nt for clea n breat h, but
and suffer in silence—even though adequate removal of the tongue coat-
doctors have heard it all before and ing may require special tongue-scrap-
are able to deal with these problems. ers, visiting a dental hygienist or using
prescription mouthwashes containing
Bad Breath zinc or chlorhexidine that control the
Edwin Winkel, professor at the depart- bacteria’s population.
ment of periodontology at the Univer- It’s not clear why some people
sity of Groningen and at the Clinic for develop the coating while others don’t,
Periodontology in the Netherlands, but many avoid discussing it and
has seen patients so embarrassed by instead suffer unnecessary stress. But
their bad breath that they will only nearly all cases are treatable. “Most bad
work from home or over the phone, breath is manageable,” says Winkel.
to avoid being around people.
Bad breath, or halitosis, can be Incontinence
caused by tooth and gum disease, meta- Marina Kaiser*, a 62-year-old designer
bolic disorders, such as diabetes, and from Germany, was devastated when
eating foods such as garlic, which make she wet her trousers in the middle of
the body produce odours that escape a parking lot full of people. She had a
through the mouth or nose. Foul breath sudden urge to urinate, but couldn’t
can also result from throat and sinus find a parking spot and didn’t make it
infections, smoking or drinking alcohol, to a nearby cafe in time.
and can be worsened by stress. But the Kaiser has been having inconti-
major bad breath culprit is the mouth nence problems since her early 50s.
bacteria that form a coating film on the In the beginning, these little incidents
tongue, especially at the back. “About happened infrequently. She thought

400 to 500 bacterial species live in the she could manage it and didn’t
seek help. It grew worse, and then it
*Name changed upon request began to happen once or twice a week.

J U ST TO O E M B A R R ASS E D
But after the parking lot accident, she

decided to talk to her doctor. “I felt so
embarrassed I knew I had to do
something,” she says.
Incontinence issues are common.
“There are lots of people with the
s a m e p ro b l e m,” s ay s u ro l o g i s t
Fiona Burkhard at Bern University
Hospital in Switzerland. “About
38 per cent of people over 30 and
77 per cent of people in nursing homes
[are affected].” But only a quarter
of them seek care, Burkhard adds.
“People don’t want to talk about it.”
The problem’s primary culprits are
pregnancy and childbirth in women
and prostate issues in men, but women
are affected more than twice as often. incontinence are offered medication.
Chronic abdominal pressure, including Kaiser, who didn’t give birth, was
constipation, heavy lifting, high-impact diagnosed with hydrocephalus, a
exercise and being overweight are neurological condition in which an
contributing factors, as can be spicy excessive fluid build-up in her brain
foods, acidic fruit, caffeinated drinks caused a loss of bladder control.
and artificial sweeteners. Strokes To correct it, doctors implanted a
and neurological disorders, such as shunt into her brain, which ensures
Parkinson’s or multiple sclerosis, can that the excess cerebrospinal fluid is
cause incontinence too. redirected to her abdomen, where it
Urologists differentiate between can be absorbed into the bloodstream.
stress incontinence, in which a Followed by prescribed daily pelvic
person leaks urine when coughing, floor exercises, Kaiser’s condition
sneezing, jumping or lifting, and significantly improved. “I am so happy
urgency incontinence caused by that I can lead a normal life again,”
P HOTO : © S HU T T E RSTO C K
uncontrollable bladder contractions. she says.

Pelvic floor exercises, weight loss and “There’s a belief that not much
avoiding bladder irritants can help. can be done about it,” Burkhard
For some cases of stress incontinence, says. But “there are treatments
doctors recommend surgery to re- for incontinence problems, so it’s
establish urethral support using a well worth visiting a doctor and
mesh whereas patients with urinary being treated”.

Excessive Perspiration which can be a social nightmare. Many

Heidi Barton, a 43-year-old housewife people feel so embarrassed about con-
from Southport, England, changed stantly being hot and wet that they
her outfits several times a day, con- keep it secret from family and friends.
stantly reapplied deodorants and Medical treatments for hyperhidro-
wore a swimsuit underneath her sis include antiperspirants of varying
clothes to absorb the sweat her body strengths, but they’re only effective
produced profusely; she felt people where applied, can cause skin irrita-
perceived her as unclean all the time. tion and can be overridden by the
On her wedding day, she couldn’t body’s need to sweat. For patients
finish the usual photography session with anxiety-triggered sweating spells,
because she was too worried about her beta-blocking medications may help.
“THERE’S A BELIEF THAT NOT MUCH CAN BE DONE

ABOUT IT,” BUT “THERE ARE TREATMENTS SO
IT’S WORTH VISITING A DOCTOR.”
— DR FIONA BURKHARD
sweat-smeared make-up and wet Another way to quell hyperhidrosis is

spots on her dress. “Every time the iontophoresis—an electrical stimula-
camera came out, I ran off,” she recalls. tion of the skin in sweat-prone areas
“The last picture of me on my wedding using simple over-the-counter kits.
day is me running away.” More recently, botox injections
Sweating is primarily caused by heat, proved to be very effective in blocking
fear, stress and exercise, and can be in- sweat released in specific areas, but
tensified by caffeine and spicy foods. the procedure can be expensive and
Men tend to sweat a bit more than painful, and must be repeated every
women, and menopausal women often four to six months. A newer method
sweat a lot due to hormonal activity. uses microwave technology to ‘fry’ the
“Sweating is a physiological reaction. patients’ sweat glands, but its long-
It is designed to cool the body,” says term effects aren’t yet known. In
Dr Anton Alexandroff, a dermatologist extreme cases, surgery is used to cut
based in Leicester, England. But some the nerves to the sweat glands.
people have an unusually high number For Heidi, who battled hyperhi-
of sweat glands, which can result in a drosis since she was 13 and had quit
medical condition called hyperhidrosis, her hairdressing job over anxieties

J U ST TO O E M B A R R ASS E D
of dripping sweat on to her clients,

botox proved that her condition can
be managed. “It’s life-changing,” she
says. “I became more outgoing, more
able to talk to people, more able to go
places.” She is now considering the
nerve-cutting surgery.
At first, Alexandroff recommends
avoiding dietary triggers and using
medical-grade antiperspirants. “If
this is not effective,” he adds, “then
you really need to see a [general
practitioner] or a dermatologist.” roomier shoes to make sure there’s
plenty of space for the feet to breathe
Smelly Feet and, where possible, barefoot sneakers.
Your feet contain about 2,50,000 sweat “Barefoot shoes, or minimalist shoes
glands and are capable of producing [shoes that mirror the foot’s natural
one cup of sweat a day. However, some shape and provide a natural, barefoot
people produce much more, depend- walking or running experience] that
ing on their genetic make-up, activity are very light allow the feet to function
level and physiological and hormonal normally and will reduce sweating
factors, says Veera Keltanen, a podia- in feet, Keltanen says, adding that
trist at the Foot Center in Helsinki, Fin- being barefoot when you can, to “just
land. The smell comes from bacteria on free your feet”, also helps. For more
the skin, which breaks down the sweat, persistent problems doctors can also
excreting offensive-smelling waste. recommend prescription medicines.
Luckily, simple remedies can help.
The basics include washing feet daily, Gas Problems
using mildly acidic soap, drying tho- “Normally people pass gas eight to
roughly in between toes and wearing 20 times a day, and that’s considered
socks made of synthetic materials to be normal,” says Jonna Jalanka, who
[specifically, the kind that pulls sweat studies intestinal microbiome at the
P HOTO : © S HU T T E RSTO C K
away from the skin to the fabric’s University of Helsinki. “The gas you’re
surface so it can evaporate] rather than producing is a combination of the
cotton, because cotton keeps moisture environment that you have in your gut,
10 times longer than acrylic. and that varies day to day.” However,
Keltanen recommends using odour- anything above 25 times may some-
absorbing insoles (but avoiding others, times signal a health problem. Intes-
such as silicon insoles), wearing tinal wind is a combination of the air we

BLANKING OUT
DON’T WORRY, IT HAPPENS to all of us. You go for an evening stroll and come
across a known face whose name seems to be at the tip of your tongue. Just that
you simply cannot recall what it is. Irritated at yourself, you finally settle for an
embarrassed ‘hello’. This inability to recall names, or something that you know but
won’t come to you at that instant is called the tip-of-tongue (TOT) phenomenon.
Research reveals that TOTs occur about once a week, increase as you age and are
often a common feature with proper nouns. “The anterior cingulate and frontal
cortex areas of the brain are involved in TOT. People suffering from it rely heavily
on visual imagery clues for recollection,” says Dr Charles Pinto, who runs a
memory clinic at Holy Family Hospital and Medical Research Centre in Mumbai.
Though there are no specific ways to prevent TOT, keeping your brain active with
puzzles, books and crosswords will be useful, according to Pinto. “Accept TOT
as normal and excuse yourself for that moment of forgetfulness. Also, be assured
that the information will be retrieved in due course of time,” he says.
—INPUTS BY ISHANI NANDI
swallow when we eat meals or drink fizzy gastroenterologist Giles Major at the
beverages, and the normal digestion England’s Nottingham University
process, in which gut bacteria break Hospitals. Occasionally, gas can be a
down our food. Belching comes from sign of an underlying health problem,
releasing air swallowed when eating such as irritable bowel syndrome.
and drinking too fast, chewing gum or In some cases, prescription drugs may
smoking. Flatulence results from the be called for.
gut bacteria that produce gases, inclu- “[Gas] is a normal function of
ding methane and hydrogen, which are your intestine, and the bacteria are
odourless, as well as hydrogen sulfide supposed to be there, and the fact that
with its smell of rotten eggs. you pass gas just means that they’re
Flatulence can increase from the doing what they’re supposed to,” Jalanka
digestion of foods like beans, cereals, says. “However, if you are feeling ill or
Brussels sprouts, onions, apples or having a lot of pain and bloating—then
bananas, which are high in complex it may be worth seeing a doctor.”
sugars that gut bacteria ferment, So, if you have any of the above
releasing gas. There’s no clear answer problems, don’t suffer in silence. And
why some people experience more don’t let embarrassment keep you from
gas discomfort than others, but living life to the fullest!
limiting offending foods helps reduce
it. Anti-spasmodic medications and Adapted from ‘Just Too Embarrassed’
peppermint tea may help too, says by Paula Wild

Can the secret to the
country’s happiness be
found in its communal pools?
Iceland’s
Water Cure
BY DAN KOIS
FROM THE NEW YORK TIMES

Iceland’s Blue Lagoon, a
popular tourist destination

I C E L A N D ’ S WAT E R C U R E
O
N A FRIGID February day run at a swimming pool, I fell into a
in Reykjavik, I stood bare- kind of brisk walk-trot, aiming for the
chested and dripping wet large set of interconnected hot tubs
just inside the dressing in the centre of the complex. I’m sure
room at the Vesturbaejarlaug pool, I looked ridiculous. The good news:
facing a long, cold walk to the outdoor I’d never been less concerned about
hot tubs. My host was stoic, strong—a my appearance while wearing almost
Viking. I was whining. nothing in public.
“I just don’t want to go out there,” I Small snowflakes glittered in the
said. “How do you make yourself do it?” sky, which at 4 p.m. was already
“You must, to swim in the pool,” darkening towards dusk. I reached
Valdimar Hafstein said with a shrug. the largest hot tub and sank to my
He is a folklorist at the University of chin. For one glorious moment, I felt
Iceland who studies the country’s my mind go blank: There was just my
pools. “Kids hate it, too. I have to haul body enveloped in warmth, the cold
my kids kicking and screaming.” I took wind on my ears only heightening my
delight. Behind me, Valdimar ambled
across the deck, saying hello to a
neighbour in another hot tub.
FOR ONE GLORIOUS Every Icelandic town, no matter
how small, has its own pool. There are
MOMENT, I FELT MY
ramshackle cement rectangles squat-
MIND GO BLANK: ting under rain clouds in the sheep-
THERE WAS JUST MY strewn boondocks. There are fancy
BODY ENVELOPED aquatic complexes with multilevel hot
IN WARMTH. tubs and awesome water slides. All
told, there are more than 120 public
P H OTO, P R E V I O US S P RE A D: © S HU T T E RSTO CK
pools—usually geothermally heated,
a deep breath. Wearing only a Speedo mostly outdoors, open all year long—
bathing suit, (I had packed three, in Iceland, a country with a popula-
in honour of the island’s reputation tion of just over 3,30,000.
as one of the company’s most avid “If you don’t have a swimming pool,
markets) I stepped on to the deck. it seems you may as well not even be a
It was a few degrees below freezing. town,” the mayor of Reykjavik, Dagur
Imagine the feeling you get when you Eggertsson, told me. I interviewed
hold an ice cube tight, that combination him, of course, as we relaxed together
of sting and ache, except imagine it all in a downtown hot tub.
over your nearly nude body. Battling These public pools, or sundlaugs,
my long-ingrained instincts never to serve as the communal heart of

Myvatn Nature Baths,
situated in a nature reserve
I c e l a n d , s a c re d p l a c e s w h o s e I swam in 14 pools all over the

affordability and ubiquity are viewed country. I met recent immigrants to the
as a kind of civil right. Families, Westfjords town Bolungarvik as they
teenagers and older people lounge mingled with their new neighbours.
and chat in sundlaugs every day, I saw Icelandic parents splash with
summer or winter. Despite Iceland’s their kids to calm them before
cruel climate, its remoteness and its bedtime. I heard stories of divorcing
winters of 19 hours of darkness per couples splitting their local pools along
P H OTO : R AGN A R T H. S I GU R DSS O N /A RCT I C
day, the people there are among the with their possessions. I watched four
IMAGES COURTESY TOURISM ICELAND
most contented in the world. septuagenarians swim laps in a

The more local swimming pools northern Iceland pool while the sunrise
I visited, the more convinced I lit up the mountains behind them and
became that Icelanders’ remarkable an attendant brought out foam cups
satisfaction is tied inextricably to the of coffee balanced on a kickboard
experience of escaping the fierce, [a small, buoyant board].
freezing air and sinking into warm “I think the swimming pools
water among their countrymen. The are what make it possible to live
pools seem to be, in fact, a key to here,” the young artist Ragnheidur
Icelandic well-being. Harpa Leifsdottir said. “You have

Scenic Seljavellir pool,
first built in 1923
storms, you have darkness, but the Iceland’s first geothermal heat flowed
swimming pool is a place for you to into 60 homes and three civic buildings:
find yourself again.” a school, a hospital and a swimming
pool. The national energy authority
FOR CENTURIES, Iceland was a nation offered no-risk loans to villages across
of seamen who regularly drowned the country to encourage geothermal
within sight of shore. One local drilling, and within a generation,
newspaper reported in 1887 that more the ancient turf house had nearly
than 100 fishermen drowned in a single disappeared from Iceland, replaced
winter. Such incidents fostered an by modern apartment buildings and
enthusiasm for swimming education. homes, all of them so toasty warm that
At the time, the only place to learn even on winter nights most Icelanders
was a muddy ditch downstream from leave a window open.
the hot spring where the women of With hot water flowing through
Reykjavik did laundry. the country and a populace eager
P H OTO : © S H UT T E R STO C K
Inspired by that hot spring, and to take a dip—swimming education

using a heavily mortgaged drill was made mandatory in all Icelandic
that had been brought to Iceland schools in 1943—pools soon popped
to search fruitlessly for gold, the up in every town.
city soon tapped the underground “Because of the weather, we
hot water generated by Iceland’s don’t have proper plazas in the
volcanic underbelly. Italian or French style,” the writer
00
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Magnus Sveinn Helgason explained clear to me, perhaps, in a dressing

to me. “Beer was banned in Iceland room in the town Isafjordur, where a
until 1989, so we don’t have the pub chatty liquor-store manager named
tradition of England or Ireland.” Snorri Grimsson told me a long story
The pool is Iceland’s social space: about the time a beautiful Australian
where families meet neighbours, girl asked him to go to the pool but
where newcomers first receive wel- then revealed that she doesn’t shower
come, where rivals can’t avoid one before swimming. He mugged a look
another. It can be hard for reserved of comic horror, then brought home
Icelanders, who “don’t typically talk to the kicker: “It was a very difficult deci-
their neighbours in the store or in the sion. Thankfully, the pool was closed!”
street”, to forge connections, Mayor I could tell this bit killed with his
Dagur told me. (Icelanders generally fellow Icelanders. My own apprecia-
use patronymic and matronymic last tion of it was somewhat impeded by
names and refer to everyone, even Snorri’s delivery of it in the nude, his
the mayor, by first name.) “In the hot left foot on the sink, stretching like a
tub, you must interact,” he continued. ballet dancer at the barre.
“There’s nothing else to do.” “It’s wonderful,” an actress named
Not only must you interact, you Salome Gunnarsdottir told me in the
must do so in a state of quite literal ex- pool one evening. “Growing up in a
posure. Most Icelanders have a story bathing culture, we see all kinds of real
about taking visitors, often American, women’s bodies. Sixty-five-year-olds,
to the pools and then seeing them middle-aged, pregnant women. Not
balk in horror at the strict requirement just people in magazines or on TV.”
to strip naked, shower and scrub their Her friends, all in their 20s, nodded
bodies with soap from head to toe. enthusiastically. “It’s so important,”
Men’s and women’s locker rooms Salome said earnestly. “You get used
feature posters highlighting all the to breasts and vaginas!”
regions you must lather assiduously: As a journalist, I will never forget the
head, armpits, undercarriage, feet. uniquely Icelandic experience of shak-
Icelanders are very serious about ing hands with the handsome Mayor
these rules, which are necessary Dagur and then, just minutes later,
because the pools are only lightly interviewing him as we each bared all.
chlorinated; tourists and shy teen- I found this disconcerting at first, but
agers are often scolded by pool eventually there was something com-
wardens for insufficient showering. forting about seeing all those other
Icelanders are quite un-self-con- chests and butts and guts—which
scious about nudity in the service of for the most part belonged to normal
pool cleanliness. This was made most human-being bodies, not sculpted

I C E L A N D ’ S WAT E R C U R E
Hofsós infinity pool, one of

the most beautiful in Iceland
masterpieces. And that comfort ex- when you come to the pool wanting
tends out into the pool proper, where to be left alone.
you might be covered—only a little, in Sigurlaug Dagsdottir, a graduate
my case—but are still on display. student researching the pools, specu-
But near-nudity, by encouraging a lated that the sundlaugs’ social utility
slight remove from others, also allows in Icelandic communities derives in
visitors to focus, in a profound and part from the intimacy of the physical
unfamiliar way, on their own body, experience: In the pool, she said, you
on its responses and needs. Despite it can “take off the five layers of clothing P H OTO : R AGN A R T H. S I GU R DSS O N /A RCT I C
being a social hub, the pool also cul- that usually separate you from every-
IMAGES COURTESY TOURISM ICELAND
tivates inwardness. one else”.

Results of a questionnaire distri- As such, the pools are a great leve-
buted by Valdimar’s research team ller. The filmmaker Jon Karl Helgason,
suggested that women in particular go who is shooting a documentary about
to the pool to seek solitude. According Iceland’s pools, said, “When people
to women I talked to, most everyone are in the swimming pool, it doesn’t
respects the posture of aquatic rev- matter if you are a doctor or a taxi
erie—head tilted back against the pool driver.” His girlfriend, Fridgerdur
wall, eyes closed, mouth smiling a tiny Gudmundsdottir, added, “Everyone
smile of satisfaction—that you adopt is dressed the same.”
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ON THE WAY from Reykjavik to the men rose from the water, picked up
Keflavik airport is the Blue Lagoon, the girl and carried her, giggling, to the
a luxurious hot-water spa that is one family pool. His biceps sported a tattoo
of Iceland’s most popular tourist of a roaring bear consumed by flames.
destinations. There, for 54 euros This time I didn’t approach anyone,
[`4,520], you can shower in private didn’t ask any questions. I didn’t speak
stalls and float in mineral-rich water— at all. I concentrated on what I could
discharge from the nearby Svartsengi feel: the water pressing lightly on my
power plant. skin, the wind prickling my beard. All
My final day in Iceland, I turned around me was the soft white noise of
off the highway just after the Blue a community. The conversation; the
Lagoon and instead drove into one of connection; the freedom, within that
those towns, the port Reykjanesbaer. flurry of sociability, to withdraw and
The lobby of the town’s pool is dotted, simply be within yourself. It called
fittingly, by a series of porthole-like to mind something a PhD student
windows. The woman working at the named Katrin Gudmundsdottir told
desk asked, “Is this your first time in an me on my first day in Iceland. She
Iceland swimming pool?” was describing a native Icelander’s
“Nope,” I said with some pleasure. sense of comfort while immersed in
The familiar signs in the show- her neighbourhood sundlaug. When I
ers were supplemented by notices in thought of what she said, a perfect G
Polish, targeting the new wave of im- chord strummed inside me. “It’s not
migrants who have found work in exactly like you’re happy,” she had
Reykjanesbaer. I snapped on my mused. “It’s that you know how to be
Speedo, steeled my courage and exited in the swimming pool.”
the warm lodge into the chill. The sun was low on the horizon,
The 36-to-38-degrees-Celsius hot tub bright but evanescent. The only other
was full of enormous men with muscu- thing in the crystal-blue sky was the
lar physiques and also a small girl in a contrail of a jet, pointed to the west. I
pink ruffled bathing suit. The largest of closed my eyes. I was in the pool.
FROM THE NEW YORK TIMES, © 2016 BY THE NEW YORK TIMES CO., NYTIMES.COM
LET’S NOT SUGARCOAT THIS

Of all the bears that could kill me, the gummy
has come the closest.
@ J IM MYB AU E R

BOOK BONUS

THE CALL
OF THE
BIG BLUE
An army man with only one leg sets off on a sailboat,
driven by his mad ambition to circumnavigate the globe
BY MAJOR ASHOK KUMAR SINGH
ILLUSTRATION BY ASHWINI MENON

THE CALL OF THE BIG BLUE
h e re w a s a mu f f l e d Brigadier H.K. ‘Harry’ Kapoor, one

crack as my artificial leg of the founding fathers of sailing in
snapped. I clutched the the Army, and I met and got down
railing as the Trishna was to planning. For a start, I took two
flung about in the heaving suitcases full of books on boat design,
seas. Suddenly, she rolled violently to construction and ocean sailing, and
one side. Her beam went so deep under went off on a 20-day break to Lucknow.
water that I thought she would go over The basic fabric of our plan was woven
completely, but, miraculously, she in October and November 1978, over
came up on top again. many days and nights of brainstorming.
The end, I thought, could not be far Early in 1979, the plan was finalized.
now. We would all go down, thousands The crew would consist of 10 army of-
of miles away from home. Perhaps the ficers, including myself, with six on the
best thing would be to let sleep take boat at any one time. We would buy the
over. Hypothermia and death would vessel in England and sail it to India,
soon follow. After all, how could I thereby gaining valuable ocean-sailing
have imagined that, with just one leg, experience. After overhauling the boat
I could sail around the world? thoroughly in Bombay and stocking up
I had started sailing as an army supplies, we would head westwards.
cadet at the National Defence Harry put the plan through the
Academy, Pune. After several national- usual channels. And then, a long
level regattas, I had even become good period of waiting began. It took about
at it. Later, I had represented India at six years for the approval to come—
several international competitions too. roughly five times what it took for us
The dream of circumnavigating the to sail around the world!
globe in a sailboat had seized me in A lot happened during those six
1978, nearly 10 years earlier, after I had years. Since nobody knew how long
successfully sailed an 18-footer, with the approval would take, I decided
two other army officers, from Bandar to end my bachelorhood. In 1980,
Abbas, Iran, to Bombay. Indeed, it I married Asha, a lecturer at a girls’
seemed such a mad ambition that college in Gwalior.
for quite some time I didn’t even tell Then something happened that
anyone about it. nearly put an end to all my dreams.
But it refused to go away. In March 1983, while hang-gliding,
Sailing a few thousand kilometres I smashed into a rock face of a cliff.
in the Arabian Sea is not the same as I fractured my legs, arms and jaw. I
circumnavigating the globe. was rushed to hospital, where a steel
So how was one to do it? Where rod was put through my left femur. A
would I begin? fortnight later, that leg developed gas

MAJOR A. K. SINGH
P H OTO GR A P H BY YAS I R I QB A L

gangrene, and to save my life the leg still keen to be considered for the sail
had to be immediately amputated round the world.
above the knee. The official sanction for the voyage
I was fitted with an artificial finally came through in June 1984. A
leg, pretty rudimentary by today’s month later, Colonel T. P. S. Chow-
standards. How on earth could I, with dhury, the crew manager, and I flew
only one good leg, stand on the wet to England. My job was to select a
and slippery deck of a boat as it was suitable boat and prepare the ground
tossed about in a stormy sea? for the sail back to Bombay, while his
For a while, I must confess, I hit was to fix up a few weeks of training
rock bottom. But slowly I recovered. for the crew.
IN FO GR A PH I C BY KE SH AV KAP IL
I began the agonizing routine of I scanned more than 400 boats
standing up and walking with a before settling on the Guinevere of
prosthesis. When I refused a stick, I Sussex, an 11-metre-long, fibreglass
was warned that I’d fall. That didn’t sloop. Her graceful lines hid a strong
bother me. After what I had been and resilient body. She was a soothing
through, what was a tumble to the sky blue, with a white cabin roof and
floor? I wrote to Harry that I would teak-inlaid decks. To a seaman, she
be functional by October and was was pure joy.
Kingston
Barbados
Trinidad
Panama Georgetown
Islas Paramaribo
Galapagos
Ascension
Belem
Natal
Marquises
Fiji Tahiti St Helena
Rarotonga
Auckland

Guinevere was a little behind in As gusty winds built up, our English
preventive maintenance, so I was sailing ‘guru’ said, “Someone needs to
able to get her price down to £28,000 reef [the process of reducing the area
[roughly `5–6 lakhs in 1984]—just of a sail, usually by folding or rolling
within our budget. one edge of the canvas in on itself ] the
The other crew members—skipper main sail.”
Major K. S. Rao, Major A. P. Singh, As if answering a call, I advanced
Captains Sanjeev Shekhar and Chan- towards the mast on all fours on the
drahas Bharti—flew in, and we began wildly jumping wet deck even as I
our training in handling an ocean- heard someone shout, “A. K. not you.”
going boat. “Why not?” I shot back through
The gods decided to test us on the howling gale and, bracing against
our very first sail. Soon after we the lifeline holding me to the mast,
set off, headwinds increased to applied myself to the job. And—gods
40 knots [about 75 kmph]. For be praised—I did it!
15 hours, freezing, soggy and seasick, That first sail proved to be a godsend.
we sailed in choppy and reef-ridden ***
waters, through a moonless night, I felt a glow of confidence deep
negotiating a busy shipping channel. inside me. If I could reef the main sail
Bombay
Colombo
Maldives Nicobar Penang
Islands Singapore
Jakarta Kupang
Bali
T Is
Mauritius Darwin
Cairns
Fiji
Brisbane
Auckland
A REPRESENTATION OF THE ROUTE TAKEN BY TRISHNA
28 SEPTEMBER 1985 TO 10 JANUARY 1987

in a storm, I could sail the boat! removing it only during the daytime
Since she was a used boat, lots of when I was off watch-duty.
repair and maintenance was needed to On the evening of 17 October, we
get Guinevere ready for the passage to heard a radio forecast of bad weather
Bombay. So after hoisting her out of the and, soon after, the storm hit. Waves
water, we set about our work in earnest. hammered the boat, and at times it
We renamed her Trishna, which tilted by up to 80 degrees. Although the
means a deep-rooted desire to achieve storm soon abated, the swell and chop
something elusive or unattainable. continued. I even had a piece of cake
The busy weeks before we left for snatched from my hand by a splashing
India sped by. Finally, on 12 October, wave before I could bite into it!
Trishna eased away from her jetty at On 31 October, we kept hearing
Gosport, to the martial tunes of an Indira Gandhi’s name on the Spanish
English bagpiper on shore—homeward and Portuguese radio channels. It
bound by way of the Suez Canal at last! was only on approaching Gibraltar
We quickly settled down to our that we received BBC bulletins about
routine. Two ‘watches’ of two men Mrs Gandhi’s assassination. We sailed
each were formed. A ‘watch’ would into the port with our flags—ours as
man the boat, taking turns at sailing well as Gibraltar’s—at half-mast.
her for four hours before handing her We stayed in the officer’s mess
Our eyes were stained red by the water—salt

caked the creases of our faces. Our tongues
were swollen, our lips white.
over to the next pair. A fifth man would in Gibraltar and its elementar y
clean the ship, do all the cooking and comforts—a hot bath, wholesome
be on standby. The skipper’s job was food, a full night’s sleep between
to see that all of us did our jobs. clean sheets and a blanket on a real,
For the first few days at sea, I full-sized bed with the limb off—were
experimented with various ways to gratifying beyond measure.
remove and store my limb and my After a good night’s rest, I awoke to
storm-suit so that I could put them a gentle knock on the door. Moments
back on in the shortest possible time. later, the housekeeper—a plump,
I ended up keeping the limb on most middle-aged Spanish lady—entered,
of the time, even through the night, and let out a scream. I turned around

A YOUNG A. K. SINGH KEEPING WATCH
TRISHNA, IN ROUGH WATERS
to find her staring in horror at the for the crew of six, with each of us
limb by the bed. Luckily, she soon preferring not more than a teaspoon,
figured out it was an artificial limb! for fear of throwing up.
*** At Aden’s Seaman’s Club we washed
After a few stops in the Mediter- and cleaned out all the salt from our
ranean, we passed through the Suez bodies. We also took a stroll through
Canal. The southern Red Sea was tur- town to feel what it was like to walk
bulent all through the 10-day passage again on land after the rough passage.
to Aden, Yemen, with headwinds, Flat and calm seas after we left
treacherous unmarked reefs, strong ad- Aden made me anxious. I wanted us
verse currents and busy shipping lanes. to move fast: Asha was expecting our
PHOTO COURTESY: A. K. SINGH
Constantly washed over by huge waves, second baby, due on 10 February.

our eyes were hurting and stained red We were now beginning to receive
by the salt water. Salt caked the creases All India Radio news frequency. That
of our faces, and lodged deep in our gave us a sense of connectedness in
nostrils and throats. Our tongues were an otherwise disorienting existence.
swollen, our lips white. On 26 January, India’s Republic
Our appetite vanished—a half-kilo Day, we dutifully hoisted the tricolour,
tin of fruit cocktail was often sufficient and five days later, Trishna sailed into

Bombay harbour. We were the first any point in time, Trishna would be
Indians to have voyaged all the way manned by six.
home from Europe on a sailboat. Preparing a boat for a voyage around
A felicitation was organized a few the world is as much a challenge as
days after we reached. Asha was in the voyage itself! The old army saying
Gwalior. I telephoned her to ask after ‘The more you sweat in peace, the less
her health. you bleed in war’ holds true here too.
Her soft, yet somewhat cold and Every instrument of Trishna was
faraway reply was, “Don’t come, I’ll tested and overhauled. Additional
manage by myself.” I realized then water tanks were installed. The hull
how lonely she was and how selfish I was dried out and scraped down;
had been. coats of epoxy resin were applied and
I caught the next flight to Gwalior. topped off with anti-fouling paint. A
Our second baby girl was born on new 100-watt, high frequency radio
9 February 1985. set was installed.
As I said goodbye to my family

before setting sail, I kept thinking:
Will I ever see them again?
Soon it was time to begin All vital boat equipment and food
preparations to sail around the world. stores were stowed in such a way that
But did we really want to? they could be grabbed quickly even
I told Asha that since I had started in a dark, upturned vessel. And I got
this, I had to see it through. If I didn’t, a new limb from the army’s Artificial
it would haunt me all my life. Limb Centre in Pune.
Not everyone felt the same way. Finally, on 28 September, Trishna,
Finally, four of us—K. S., Bharti, dressed up in all her colourful flags,
Shekhar and I—formed the permanent was brought alongside the jetty. As
crew. Six others—Tipsy, A. P. and I said goodbye to my family I kept
four other army officers who had thinking: Will I ever see them again?
volunteered—Captain Rakesh Bassi, ***
Second Lieutenant Navin Ahuja and The south-west monsoon winds
Majors Surendra Mathur and Animesh were receding after the rains and
Bhattacharya were to sail roughly during the day, there were gentle winds
a third of the way each, so that, at but before dusk, the sky would darken

LEFT: THE YOUNG MAJOR WITH THE BIRD HE RESCUED. RIGHT: SNAPSHOT OF A
REGULAR DAY FROM THE VOYAGE.
with forebodings of thunderstorms. Two of the water tanks were empty.

One evening, before dusk, a small, Brushing teeth and rinsing our mouths
tired bird alighted on Trishna. It was ill were limited to alternate days.
so we wrapped it in cloth, and placed We had barely sailed past Agulhas
it inside a bucket. A large flock of its Point, the southern tip of Africa, when
fellows followed us all night, chirping huge seas began building up. The bright
agitatedly to an occasional feeble sunny sky suddenly became dark,
cheep from their friend. The next day stormy and overcast. Even as we hastily
our birdie died, and we consigned it to reduced sail, Cape Town Radio’s storm
the deep blue sea with a heavy heart. warning for the area came on the air:
We reached Mauritius on 25 October “Attention all ships! Winds gusting
after midnight. Here, boat and crew to 65 knots [120 kmph].”
were to be readied for the long passage With all sails down, Trishna was
to St Helena, round Cape of Good tumbling through colossal seas that
Hope. Trishna’s water tanks, including rose well over 55 feet high. At times, a
the additional tanks we latched on, wave would break just behind us, and
could carry only 150 American gallons several hundred tons of cold frothing
[about 570 litres] of freshwater, which water would threaten to submerge us.
would last us up to 60 days with severe Thankfully, the winds abated the next
rationing. Some sails needed repairs; morning. But it took a while before we
all equipment and systems needed were able to relax. A. P. echoed all our
looking over. feelings when he mumbled, “Something
The first few days out of Mauritius to tell our grandchildren about!”
brought light winds. And by the time The sail across the Atlantic up to
we neared the Cape, our skipper had St Helena, and then to the Caribbean,
ordered strict rationing of freshwater. was quite calm. Having given us a taste

of their might, the gods now gave us The Brazilian Navy looked after us in
weeks of safe, pleasant sailing. Natal. And Shankaran Kutty, one of the
One pleasant, windless day, as few Indians in the area, called us over
we were doing about two knots for a meal. The professor had cooked
[4 kmph], a whale spouting jets of the meal himself and as we ate, his
water appeared barely 150 metres washing machine choked and coughed
away. It moved straight towards over our salty and grimy clothes!
us, its huge black hump above the After stops in Sur iname and
water. Everyone rushed on deck, life Guyana, we reached Trinidad at the
jackets in hand. We tried to start the end of January 1986. We were to have
auxiliary engine in an effort to motor our first crew change here and as we
to a safe distance, but then the engine approached the jetty at Port of Spain,
developed a snag. Luckily, we crossed we could see the tall, handsome Navin
barely 30 to 40 metres ahead of the Ahuja, Bassi’s replacement and, at
12-metre-long creature. Sensing our 21, the youngest member of the
presence, it executed a fascinating Trishna team.
On 25 April 1986, Trishna crossed the halfway

point of her circumnavigation. From this
point on we were headed home.
dive. First the hump rose. Then The first few days after leaving
the huge back surfaced, and with a Trinidad brought strong gusting
wriggling movement, the whale began headwinds and opposing currents,
its dive. The forked tail, about three and we made almost no progress.
metres across, rose and propelled it When we finally got to Barbados, K. S.
downwards with a powerful slow- got the news of the birth of a daughter.
motion flipper action, leaving behind He later named her Trishna.
a huge turquoise turbulence. We were After the Panama Canal there
to encounter whales many times was a change of crew, with Tipsy
during our voyage. Chowdhury, who had been part of the
*** crew on Trishna’s first voyage from
We anchored off the floating pier England to India, replacing A. P.
of the yacht club in Natal, Brazil, on For the four permanent team
28 December. We had taken about a members, a crew change was an
month to cross the Atlantic. event to look forward to. The new man

always lifted our spirits, and removed On 25 April 1986, Trishna crossed the
the staleness, which tended to set in halfway point of her circumnavigation.
during voyage. From this point on we were headed
Tipsy didn’t disappoint us. He back home, not away from it.
brought lots of personal mail and A fierce three-day storm brewed as
many packets of homemade sweets. we approached Auckland, parting the
He had also brought a set of spare main sail at the seams with a loud rip.
joints for my artificial limb. The spare was hoisted, but it, too, blew
The boat had sailed over 30,000 kilo- out in the ferocious gusts.
metres by now. We dried out seawater K. S. and Bharti took turns at
from Trishna’s fibreglass hull by shor- mending one of the torn sails. It was
ing her up on land for three weeks and tough work, having to put each stitch
overhauled all fittings and instruments. on the thick sailcloth, threading the
Ou r f a m i l i e s a l s o v i s i t e d u s. needle through the earlier thread holes
Shekhar’s father came from Varanasi. one by one in the abating storm. They
Asha and Bharti’s wife Manju, flew in were also repeatedly seasick since any
together. Their coming did us a lot of task on choppy seas that demands
good. Alas, after a few days together, intense hand-eye coordination greatly
back they went. increases nausea. But their persistence
For the first four days and nights, paid off, and the main sail was hoisted
after entering the Pacific, we inched again and, thankfully, the stitches held.
ahead on windless, glassy seas. At One night, coming up to relieve the
last, a steady breeze sprang up and port watch, we saw to our horror, a
we reached Santa Cruz, the principal black container ship, a few hundred
island in the Galapagos. No one here metres away, bearing down straight
had seen a Sikh with a turban before, at us at full speed. We were inching
and Tipsy was soon nicknamed Ali forward pathetically slowly, right
Baba. One man actually asked him if across the huge ship’s bows. It was
he was a magician! too late for us to take any avoiding
Our 5,000-odd-kilometre sail from action. On came the ship, its engines
Santa Cruz to French Polynesia went pounding. We desperately shone our
quickly. Although it was getting cool at tiny searchlight in the direction of the
night, the days were still clammy below ship’s bridge to attract the officer-of-
decks and my limb was almost always the-watch’s attention.
hot. Pools of sweat collected in the Our luck held. Suddenly, the ship
bowl-like lower portion of the socket. gave a hard starboard rudder, and
I had to clean it out regularly. Also, the veered sharply to the right, still turning
steel joints had rusted through; this as it thundered past barely metres away.
was a constant source of worry. ***

A beaming Animesh Bhattacharya sails and rudders to balance out the

was at the jetty in Auckland to greet storm’s fury and hold her as best as
us. He was to replace Navin. With his possible—a procedure called ‘hove-to’.
loud laughs and backslaps, Bhatta was As the storm raged, I laboriously
a welcome addition on board. Earlier, cut steel pieces from the spares I was
two persons were needed to heave carrying to rivet them to fix the limb.
anchor; now Bhatta alone was enough. Several unsuccessful attempts and
A day later, as we headed for Sydney, broken rivets later, I managed to stand
the barometer began falling sharply. on my own two feet, although they
The deep cyclonic low pressure was really were beyond fixing and needed
soon upon us. immediate replacement.
And then, what I dreaded most, On the fifth day the fury abated,
happened. My artificial limb and we made good progress towards
snapped as I struggled for balance at Sydney. Tipsy was to fly home from
the wheel. A feeling of utter there, and Surendra Mathur was
helplessness overwhelmed me. Boat to join us. We would miss Tipsy’s
and crew battled it out. Standing my infectious optimism.
watch, I crouched, frustrated and The prosthetist at Sydney needed
despairing, in a cold dark corner of around a week to fit me with a new
the cockpit, sheltering myself against limb, but skipper said we couldn’t wait,
the stormy spray. so we sailed off after only four days,
But then, with all my might I fought hoping it would pass the trials at sea!
off my desire to give in. After the Tasman Sea, not many
Trishna sailed in to Bombay harbour on

10 January 1987. I could see Asha and the girls,
waiting for me.
The storm intensified to a furious areas of predictably stormy weather

head-on 50 knots [93 kmph], with remained. Instead, the danger from
steep 45-feet waves as we tried to make reefs, shoals and shipping were to
headway. Skipper had gone without increase greatly on our passage towards
sleep for more than 60 hours, and Indonesia and the Malacca Straits, and
was near collapse when we decided onwards to the Bay of Bengal.
to let Trishna ride out the storm by At Singapore, the headmaster of
herself, by securing her heavily reefed the United World College of South

ASHA AND A. K. SINGH’S DAUGHTERS,

WAITING TO WELCOME HIM HOME.
THE AUTHOR WITH HIS FAMILY,

SEVERAL YEARS DOWN THE LINE.
Asia asked me to talk to his students as part of the Republic Day parade,
on the travails of sailing around the ‘sailed’ down Rajpath in a specially
world on one leg. I spoke instead of fabricated trailer.
its pleasures! I was boarded out of the Army on
After halts at Penang, the Andamans medical grounds in 1990 and Asha
and Colombo, Trishna sailed into and I moved to Lucknow with our
Bombay harbour to a resounding daughters Akshi and Aditi to rebuild
w e l c o m e o n 1 0 Ja n u a r y 1 9 8 7 . life on Civvy Street. I now run a
Everything afloat in Bombay feted successful petrol pump, administer
us home, the ships in harbour jetting a school and college that provide
water in greeting, shooting flares, low-cost quality education in my
blaring horns, and naval helicopters village, and run (5K) for social causes
showering us with petals, as we made whenever I can.

our way to the Gateway of India where Over 30 years have passed since our
I could see Asha and the girls, dressed voyage, but the memory of it remains
in their best and carrying placards, as fresh as ever. For me there will
waiting for me. never be a boat better than Trishna
Trishna then made an overland nor a better crew to sail with than
passage by rail to New Delhi and, those who sailed her with me.
THIS IS A CONDENSED VERSION OF THE BOOK BEYOND HORIZONS, PUBLISHED BY RUPA PUBLICATIONS;
© COPYRIGHT 2014 BY MAJOR A. K. SINGH. THE TEXT HAS BEEN PRINTED WITH PERMISSION.

WHO KNEW
13 Things
You Didn’t
Know
About the
Common
Cold
BY B RA N D O N S P EC KTO R
1 The term ‘common cold’ is a bit

of a misnomer. Common implies
that there’s a single, ordinary patho-
know for sure whether low tempera-
tures affect a virus’s pathogenicity, but
they do believe that colds are more
gen to blame for your runny nose, prevalent in winter, in part because
coughing and mild fatigue. Actually, we tend to spend more time indoors,
there’s a huge array of viruses—more in close quarters with infected people
I L LU ST RAT I ON BY S E RG E B LO C H
than 200 of them—that induce colds, and surfaces.

each with its own means of evading
your body’s defences. For this reason
alone, it’s unlikely that a catch-all
‘cure for the common cold’ will
3 On top of this, breathing in dry
winter air dries out the mucosal
lining that protects your nasal cavi-
ever be found. ties. When that happens, your body
can’t do its job of catching poten-
2 As for the ‘cold’ part, well, it’s

complicated. Scientists don’t
tially dangerous microbes before
they reach your respiratory system.

“The body fights back by secreting
more mucus to mechanically flush
out the virus,” says Evangeline Laus-
6 But try not to rest while lying
flat on your back. That can
make things worse because gravity
ier, MD, an adjunct assistant profes- may cause the congestion in your
sor at Duke Integrative Medicine, nasal passages to drip down your
North Carolina, USA. So don’t blame throat, making it sore and causing
your runny nose on the cold: That’s a cough. Coughing while lying flat
your body telling you it’s fighting isn’t very comfortable, and it can
back! (You can help your mucus win keep you awake. Instead, prop
this fight by drinking lots of fluids.) yourself upright with pillows to “re-
duce the cough receptor irritation
4 We get colds more often than

we might realize. Adults suffer
an average of two to three each year,
in the back of the throat”, Lausier
says. This can also help move that
mucus along and make it easier for
and some children get eight or more. you to breathe.
They’re costly too. In the United
States, a 2012 survey found that colds
cut productivity by a mean of 26 per
cent. Another survey estimated the
7 Another cost-free way to get
better quicker? Find a caring
friend or relative to nurse you. A
total cost of lost productivity to be 2009 study from the University of
almost $25 billion (about `180 crore) Wisconsin–Madison showed that
each year. patients who rated their doctors
with a perfect score on an empathy
5 That said, the best medicine is

free: rest. When you get sick, your
body doesn’t want to do anything
questionnaire were sick one day
less than patients with less sensitive
doctors. Patients with the most
other than tackle the virus. If you empathetic doctors also showed
go about your normal routine, the double the levels of IL-8, a protein
cold can have an even more molecule the body releases to
negative impact on your health— fight colds.
and your brain. In a study of nearly
200 people, published in Brain,
Behavior, and Immunity, researchers
found that those with colds reported
8 Although your body needs rest,
Lausier says an excellent way to
boost your immune system is with
poor alertness, a negative mood and a bit of light exercise. It’s no sur-
psychomotor slowing—their thought prise that regular exercise helps you
processes were muddied, and their fight back against germs. One study
reaction times were slower than from the University of Washington
those of healthy folks. in Seattle, USA, showed that over-

1 3 T H I N G S YO U D I D N ’ T K N OW A B O U T T H E CO M M O N CO L D
weight or obese postmenopausal for internal medicine at Fortis La

women who exercised got fewer Femme, Delhi. “However, it’s best to
colds than those who didn’t. A 2014 include zinc-rich foods in your diet
review showed that regular moder- than consume supplements on a daily
ate-intensity exercise may help pre- basis,” says Singh. Red meat, shellfish,
vent a cold, but more research is beans and nuts are some of the nat-
needed. One explanation, according ural sources of zinc.
to the US National Library of Medi-
cine, may be that exercise helps flush
germs out of the lungs and airways. 12 The cold virus can survive
up to 24 hours or longer
outside the human body, so give
9 Chicken soup might really

work—though your mum’s spe-
cial recipe isn’t the reason. In fact,
your hands a good scrubbing after
touching that doorknob or faucet at
work. In fact, a small 2011 study
any clear soup, rasam, for instance, showed that people infected with
helps because the warm liquid may rhinovirus contaminated 41 per cent
ease congestion and increase mucus of the surfaces in their homes—
flow. “I think chicken soup is great including doorknobs, TV remotes
for hydration—hot liquid, salt and and faucets. An hour after touching
electrolytes,” Lausier says. those infected surfaces, the finger-
tips of nearly 25 per cent of people
10 Don’t rely on vitamin C supple-

ments. In a 2013 review of 29
still tested positive for a cold virus.
separate trials, regular vitamin C sup-

plements failed to reduce cold inci-
dences across the board. Huge doses
13 Grandma was right: Gargling
can help, maybe even as a
preventive. In a single study from
to ease symptoms had small effects in Japan, some volunteers were asked
some but not all studies. However, it is to regularly gargle with water while
a good idea to include natural sources others were not. After 60 days, the
of vitamin C in your diet. gargling group had a nearly 40 per
cent reduction in colds compared
11 Zinc, however, may help. “Zinc

helps in maintaining the inte-
grity of your mucosal lining. A healthy
with the control group. To soothe a
sore throat, Mayo Clinic advises
gargling with one quarter to one-half
lining may help you resist viral infec- of a teaspoon of salt mixed with
tions. Additionally, zinc inhibits about 250 ml of warm water. (The
the multiplication of rhinovirus [the salt will draw out excess fluids from
most common cause of colds],” says your body.)
Dr Anupama Singh, senior consultant —WITH INPUTS FROM BLESSY AUGUSTINE

Brain Teasers
Challenge yourself by solving these puzzles and mind-stretchers,
then check your answers on the next page.
BIRDHOUSES (Difficult)
The Robinsons have three birdhouses in dif-
ferent colours: red, blue and yellow. They’ve
hung them in a tree so that they face their
home. They had a number of branches to
choose from, in the
configuration shown.
The red birdhouse is

on a higher branch
than the yellow one.
The yellow birdhouse is to
the left of the blue one, but not
necessarily directly to the left.
The blue one hangs from a
thicker branch than the red one.
Only one of the following three statements is true:

Q The red birdhouse is in the top row.
Q The yellow birdhouse is in the left column.
Q The blue birdhouse hangs from one of the two thickest branches.
Can you figure out where each birdhouse was placed?

(B I RDH O US E S ) DA R RE N R I GBY
LUCK OF THE DRAW (Easy)

There are six marbles in a bag. They are exactly
alike except for colour: one is red, two are
green and three are blue. Without looking into
the bag, what’s the smallest number of marbles
you would need to draw out to guarantee
getting either two green or two blue ones?

BRAIN TEASERS
ARITHME-PICK (Moderately difficult)

Place one of the four basic arithmetic operations (+, –, ×, ÷) in each box to
make a correct equation. Symbols may be repeated, and you don’t have
to use all four. All operations are performed from left to right, ignoring the
mathematical order of operations. The result at each step must be a positive
( LU C K O F T HE DR AW, FA I R A N D S Q UA RE ?) M AR C EL DA NE S I; (A R IT HM E - P ICK ) F R ASE R S IMP S ON; (C R OSS HA IR S) DARR EN RIG BY

whole number. What’s the equation?
5 7 3 9 4 = 32
CROSS HAIRS (Easy) FAIR AND SQUARE? (Moderately difficult)
None of the white Would it be possible to join these six pieces
squares in this diagram together to form a square?
have their edges lined
up. One of the squares is
1
a different size from the
2
others. Can you find it?
4
3
6
5
Brain teasers: Answers

BIRDHOUSES LUCK OF THE CROSS HAIRS FAIR AND SQUARE?
The RED birdhouse DRAW YES
is hanging from the FOUR
smaller branch in
5
the top row. The
YELLOW one is 4
hanging from the 3
centre branch. ARITHME-PICK
The BLUE one is 5 + 7 ÷ 3 × 9 – 4 = 32 2
hanging from the
branch on the 1
6
bottom right.

IT PAYS TO ENRICH YOUR
Word Power
You’re busy at this time of year, so we made this quiz
as easy as a, b, c. All these words include those
letters—in order (ignoring some repeats). You’ll find
this aerobic mental exercise more fun if you don’t
fabricate the answers, which are on the next page.
BY EM I LY COX A ND H E NRY RAT HVON
1. ambience n. ('am-bee-ents)— lents)—A: medical aid. B: contra-

A: act of listening. B: stroll. dictory feelings. C: left-handedness.
C: atmosphere. 9. lambency n. ('lam-ben-see)—
2. diabolical adj. (dy-uh-'baw-lih- A: meekness. B: desperation.
kuhl)—A: devilish. B: two-faced. C: radiance.
C: acidic. 10. abdicate v. ('ab-dih-kayt)—
3. sabbatical n. (suh-'ba-tih- A: give up. B: start. C: decline to vote.
kuhl)—A: prayer shawl. B: strict 11. Malbec n. (mal-'bek)—A: coffee
command. C: extended leave. blend. B: French pirate. C: red wine.
4. abject adj. ('ab-jekt)—A: lofty. 12. abeyance n. (uh-'bay-ents)—
B: lowly. C: central. A: following orders. B: barking.
5. swashbuckler n. ('swahsh-buh- C: temporary inactivity.
kler)—A: studded belt. B: daring 13. shambolic adj. (sham-'baw-lik)—
adventurer. C: threshing blade. A: misleading. B disorganized.
6. abacus n. ('a-buh-kuss)— C: widely shunned.
A: sundial. B: magic spell. 14. abscond v. (ab-'skond)—
C: ancient counting tool. A: steal away. B: trip and fall.
7. rambunctious adj. (ram-'bunk- C: fail to rhyme.
shuss)—A: goat-like. B: unruly. 15. sawbuck n. ('saw-buk)—
C: wide awake. A: horse trainer. B: ten-dollar bill.
8. ambivalence n. (am-'bih-vuh- C: tree trimmer.

WORD POWER
Answers
1. ambience—(C) atmosphere. Roy’s moon’s lambency, the lovers staged
Cafe isn’t much of a name, but the their secret rendezvous.
place actually has a nice ambience.
10. abdicate—(A) give up. Having
2. diabolical—(A) devilish. Wile E. failed her accounting course, Prema
Coyote’s diabolical schemes usually was forced to abdicate her role as
end as spectacular failures. class treasurer.
3. sabbatical—(C) extended leave. 11. Malbec—(C) red wine. Trisha
Dr Kumar is taking a sabbatical this savoured a sip of Malbec, then took
semester to finish her book. a bite of her filet mignon.
4. abject—(B) lowly. The sight of a 12. abeyance—(C) temporary inactiv-
spider in the bathtub made Harbhajan ity. The torrential rain seems to be in
act like an abject coward. abeyance, but more storms are forecast.
5. swashbuckler—(B) daring adven- 13. shambolic—(B) disorganized. Ravi’s
turer. Robin Hood and Zorro are two bachelor pad is always in a shambolic
famous fictional swashbucklers. state, with dirty socks on the floor and
dishes in the sink.
6. abacus—(C) ancient counting tool.
I couldn’t do my homework, because 14. abscond—(A) steal away. Where’s
my dog ate the beads off my abacus. that knave who absconded with the
queen’s tarts?
7. rambunctious—
(B) unruly. Is there 15. sawbuck—(B)
anything more BY THE LETTERS ten-dollar bill. “In
exhausting than baby- Each word below has an uncom- the old days, you
mon alphabetical distinction.
sitting a group of could have a feast
Can you identify what it is in
rambunctious five- each case? for just a sawbuck,”
year-olds? 1. facetious 2. nonsupports Jean grumbled as
3. uncopyrightable 4. almost she pulled out her
8. ambivalence—(B)
5. sponged wallet.
contradictory feelings. alphabetical order.
I do have some order. 5. Letters are in reverse VOCABULARY
RATINGS
ambivalence about 4. Letters are in alphabetical
bet. 3. No letter is repeated. 9 & below: able
trapping the chip-
MATTHEW COHEN
the second half of the alpha- competitor

munks in my attic. order. 2. All letters are from 10–12: fabulous
five vowels are in alphabetical contender
9. lambency—(C) By the Letters Answers: 1. All
13–15: absolute
radiance. By the champ

Me & My Shelf
THE BILINGUAL BOOKSHELF OF AMITABHA BAGCHI
Amitabha Bagchi has written four novels and

is an associate professor at the department of
computer science and engineering at IIT Delhi.
His latest novel Half the Night is Gone (Juggernaut)
has been shortlisted for the JCB Prize 2018 and the
Hindu Literature Prize 2018. Bagchi lives in Delhi
with his wife and son.
ZINDAGINAMA, Krishna Sobti, Rajkamal Prakashan (Hindi) and

Harper Perennial (English), `295 and `550 respectively. Perhaps
the one book that has moved me the most, Zindaginama is a
portrait of rural Punjab, a generation before Partition. Sobti
writes a beautiful, demotic Hindi shot through with Punjabi.
Her compassion and panoramic view of life make this a classic.
CHANDNI BEGUM, Qurratulain Hyder, Women Unlimited, `450.

The book seems like a madcap portrayal of a noble Muslim fami-
ly’s decline at first, but is dense with cultural allusions that range
from Banabhatta’s Kadambari to the Babri Masjid. It’s not an easy
read, but a deeply satisfying one.
ARANYAK, Bibhutibhushan Bandopadhyaya, Seagull Books

(English), `699. This dreamy work is set in the forests of Bihar
where a young man from Kolkata has taken a job as an agent
for a landowner. He revels in the beauty of the forest and the
simplicity of tribal life. However, his job entails clearing the
forest and renting the land out to tillers, in other words, destro-
P H OTO: A M I TA B H A B AGC H I
ying the world whose beauty he admires.
DELHI, Khushwant Singh, Penguin Books, `399. Singh is, I feel,

the most underrated of Indian English writers. This book is a
masterpiece that takes one thousand years of history into its
sweep. The destructive pas de trois between different religions
over the 20th century that continues to echo in our times falls
into perspective as we read this book.

ME & MY SHELF
MAILA ANCHAL, Phanishwarnath Renu, Rajkamal Prakashan

(Hindi), `299. Set in a small village in Bihar in the time around
Independence, this novel is funny and tragic, and vastly illumi-
nating for anyone who wants to understand the painful circum-
stances under which the Indian republic was born. Sadly, its
English translation, The Soiled Border, is no longer available.
THE SMALL WILD GOOSE PAGODA, Irwin Allan Sealy, Aleph,

`595. Better known for the Shandean excesses of The Trotter-
Nama, Sealy focuses on the small in this recent work. Ostensibly
about a modest construction project carried out within his com-
pound, this book expands outwards in many directions. Sealy is
the finest practitioner of the English language in India today. His
prose is as filled with delight as the Pahari miniatures he loves.
IN SEARCH OF LOST TIME, (Volumes I–VI), Marcel Proust,

The Modern Library, `4,499. The lesson I learnt from Proust is
that the sentence can be like a hurricane, sucking in ideas and
characters from around it and spitting them out, churning with
incredible speed around a preternaturally serene centre. Warn-
ing: Proust is addictive.
THE RINGS OF SATURN, W. G. Sebald, Vintage Classics, `499.

A Sebald-like character takes a walk through the wild country-
side of Suffolk on the eastern coast of England. As he walks he
reflects on various aspects of history and literature. Sebald’s
prose creates a kind of shimmering other-worldliness shot
through with pain.
PAHALA PADAV, Shrilal Shukla, Rajkamal Prakashan (Hindi),

`450. A young man lusts after a construction worker, until the
mysterious death of her husband raises his conscience. Shukla’s
one-liners and his deep sympathy for the plight of labourers
make this an unforgettable work. An English translation, Open-
ing Moves, was released in 1993 but is now out of print.
THE LIFE OF A TEXT: PERFORMING THE RĀMCARITMĀNAS

OF TULSIDAS, Philip Lutgendorf, University of California Press,
`6,770. Lutgendorf loves Banaras, Tulsidas, Rāmcaritmānas, and
the people who read it, recite it and perform it, and because he
loves all of them, this book transcends academic limitations to
become an uplifting journey into the world of this much-loved
religious text. —COMPILED BY BLESSY AUGUSTINE
Book prices are subject to change.

Entertainment
OUR TOP PICKS OF THE MONTH
Films
Sara Ali Khan makes her debut in
(Above) A still from Zero;
(below) Mary Poppins Returns
The animated film has Nicholas Cage,
Kedarnath, a romantic drama set in Mahershala Ali and Kimiko Glenn
the eponymous place of pilgrimage. voicing characters.
Set against the backdrop of the 2013 If you’ve forgotten what it’s like to
Uttarakhand floods, the movie be a child, Disney is here to remind
is about the relationship between a you with Mary Poppins Returns. The
Hindu girl and a Muslim boy magical nanny (Emily Blunt) is back
(Sushant Singh Rajput). The to help the Banks children through
film releases on 7 December. a difficult time in their lives. The
In 2011, Marvel Comics musical, directed by Rob Mar-
added a young, Afro–Latino shall, releases on 19 December.
Spider-Man called Miles In Zero, Shahrukh Khan plays a
Morales to their roster. On dwarf who finds a companion
14 December this year, Miles in Anushka Sharma, who
meets Peter Parker and the plays a scientist with cerebral
other ‘Spider-People’— palsy. This irreverant roman-
each of whom protects a tic comedy directed by
different, alternate uni- Aanand L. Rai also stars
verse—in Spider-Man: Katrina Kaif. The film hits
Into The Spider-Verse. theatres on 21 December.

E N T E R TA I N M E N T
A still from Mowgli:

BOOKS Legend of the Jungle
Touted as the Chinese Lord of the

Rings, Jin Yong’s A Hero Born: Le-
gends of Condor Heroes (Hachette),
which has sold more than 300 mil-
lion copies so far,
will release in India
this month. The
book is set against
the backdrop of
Genghis Khan’s in-
vasion of the Song
Empire in 1200 AD.
Streaming
Bloomsbury is Andy Serkis reinvents Rudyard
bringing out newer Kipling’s beloved masterpiece,
editions of several in which a boy, torn between
classics such as two worlds, accepts his destiny
Anton Chekov’s and becomes a legend.
Three Years and Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle
Fyodor Dostoevsky’s Humiliated has a star-studded cast that
and Insulted. Part of this list is includes Christian Bale,
Virginia Woolf’s The Waves, which Cate Blanchett, Benedict
was first published in 1931 and is
Cumberbatch and Freida
Pinto. The film will premiere
considered to be her most ambi-
on Netflix on 7 December.
tious novel. Another book to look
Based on Aravind Adiga’s
forward to is the English translation BOOK COVER COURTESY: BLOOMSBURY
novel of the same name,
of the renowned Belgian painter
Selection Day is a coming-of-
René Magritte’s Selected Writings.
age drama about two brothers
Actor Manisha Koirala writes the
who are raised by their strict,
personal story of her battle against
obsessive father to be star
ovarian cancer in Healed (Penguin
cricketers in India. The first
Random House). From her treat-
season of the original series
ment to the strength it took to re- premieres on Netflix
build her life, the book recounts on 28 December.
her difficult but inspiring journey. —COMPILED BY
BLESSY AUGUSTINE
All release dates are subject to change.

Studio
IMAGE COURTESY: ESTATE OF PRABUDDHA DASGUPTA
SACHA AND HER PARENTS, PAMELA AND RENE MENDES, IN THEIR LIVING ROOM,
BY PRABUDDHA DASGUPTA, BLACK AND WHITE DIGITAL PHOTOGRAPH, 2009
Prabuddha Dasgupta (1956–2012) was a self-taught photographer who straddled
the worlds of art and fashion photography effortlessly. In the series Edge of Faith,
which was published as a compilation by Seagull Books in 2009, he creates an
intimate portrait of the Catholic community in Goa. Even though he intended to
capture a community torn between their Portuguese faith, culture and post-
Independence identity, the above photograph is an instance where his work
transcends his intention. Sacha, the central figure in the above photograph, oozes
confidence. Rooted in the past (represented by her parents), she looks assertively
into the camera and the future ahead. — BLESSY AUGUSTINE

Quotable Quotes
Too often we ... enjoy Our ultimate goal,
the comfort of opinion after all, is not a good
without the discomfort death, but a good life
of thought. to the very end.
J O H N F. K E N N E DY, AT U L GAWA N D E ,
35th president of USA author & surgeon
I HAVE NO SOCIAL MEDIA. I DON’T NEED THINGS IN

MY LIFE TO DISTRACT ME FROM MY LIFE.
PAU L R U D D, a c t o r
I define nothing. Not beauty, not

patriotism. I take each thing as
FR OM TO P : W I K I P E D I A , I N DI A P I C T U RE , B AN DE E P SI NG H /IN DI A TODAY
it is, without prior rules about
what it should be.
B O B DY L A N , m u s i c i a n
I’m a pessimist It doesn’t matter whether we

because of agree or disagree. If we do not
intelligence, but have the right to speak freely,
an optimist we will turn into a society that
because of will. suffers from intellectual
A NTO N IA G R A M S CI ,
malnutrition ... a nation of fools.
political theorist A R U N D H ATI R OY, a u t h o r
The forest is not a collection of entities [but] a

place entirely made from strands of relationship.
DAVI D G EO RG E H A S K E LL , b i o l o g i s t

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DECEMBER

BEWARE! HE WANTS TO BREAK YOUR

A MONSTER AND A GENTLEMAN

CHASING GEORGE HARRISON

13 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT

DEPARTMENT OF WIT: TWINKLE KHANNA .......... 18

Cover Story 114 HOME, BUT NOT ALONE

70 ’TIS THE SEASON OF 124 JUST TOO

88 BEWARE! HE WANTS TO Book Bonus

BREAK YOUR HEART 138 THE CALL

108 SEAT WITH A VIEW

READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 3

VOICES & VIEWS

30 It Happens Only in India

TOP L E F T: YO GE N S H A H, B OT TOM : I N DIAP I CT U R E

REGULAR FEATURES 36 “The secret to a happy

152 13 Things You Didn’t

6 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

Editor Sanghamitra Chakraborty Editor-in-Chief Aroon Purie

Senior Art Director Sadhana Moolchandani GM, Marketing &

TRUSTED MEDIA BRANDS, INC. (FORMERLY RDA INC.)

President and Chief Executive Officer Bonnie Kintzer

8 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

and the sweet fragrance of marzipan, as I write to you.

READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 9

Reader’s Digest will pay for your funny

10 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

THE DREADED A BALM FOR THE SOUL

12 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 13

Mercy for a Thief

14 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 15

16 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

Beware Of Mummy Dearest

I L LU ST RAT I O N BY RA J U ; ( TW I N K L E K HA NNA) K ES HAV KAPI L

MY MOTHER HAS NEVER BEEN the Band-Aid

18 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 19

how I used to eat mangoes sitting opportunity and is now persuading

to persuade mummy dearest to these conditions I take back my

20 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

TAKEN FROM MRS FUNNYBONES, COPYRIGHT © 2015 BY TWINKLE KHANNA.

WHEN NEWS ANCHORS GET A CASE OF THE PUNS

BREAKING NEWS: Scientists have discovered what may be

BREAKING NEWS: Overworked janitor sweeps the nation.

BREAKING NEWS: My corduroy pillow has been making

READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 21

A chest surgeon shares an alarming first-hand

When Air Becomes Death

THE PROCESS OF BREATHING STARTS at birth and

22 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

to be present in the on reproductive systems including

READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 23

24 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

“I forgot my phone. Now how am I supposed to share

MY SIX-YEAR-OLD grandson was “Mountains,” she replied, “The

READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 25

The seventh generation in a family of classical musicians, the

26 | DECEMBER 2018 | READER’S DIGEST

the “Sa Re Ga Ma boys”. We had ‘Satyam Shivam Sundaram’ were now

READER’S DIGEST | DECEMBER 2018 | 27

Misuse of the anti-dowry law versus a