Eternity in The Moment. The Life and Wisdom of Elder Arsenie Papacioc

ETERNITY
Mo m en t
Eternity in the moment
TH E L IF E AND W IS D O M OF
E L D E R A R S E N IE P A P A C IO C
by Sorin Alpctri
Translated from the Romanian by

Hicromonk Ieremia (Berbec) and Simona Irime
Edited by the St. Herman o f Alaska Brotherhood
ST . H E R M A N O F A L A S K A B R O T H E R H O O D
2.0 18
Copyright © 1018 by the
St. Herman of Alaska Brotherhood
P. O. Box 70
Platina, CA 96076
website: svwsv.sainthermanmonastery.com
email: stherman@sthcrman.com
First edition. Printed in the United States of America
Originally published as Sorin Alpetri, Intre timp şi veşnicie: Viaţa

Părintelui Arsenic Papacioc [Betsveen time and eternity: The Life of
Father Arsenie Papacioc] (Bucharest: Accent Print Press, 2.015).
Front cover: Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc at Techirghiol Monas

tery, photograph by Mircca Camburu, June 2.006.
Back cover: Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc at Techirghiol Monas

tery.
Publishers Cataloging-in-Publication
Names: Alpetri, Sorin, author. | Ieremia (Hieromonk), translator. | Irinie, Si

mona, translator. | St. Herman o f Alaska Brotherhood, editor, issuing body.
Title: Eternity in the m om ent: the life and wisdom o f Elder Arsenic Papacioc
/ by Sorin Alpetri ; translated from the Romanian by Hicrm onk Ieremia
and Simona Irim e; edited by the St. Herman o f Alaska Brotherhood.
Description: First edition. | Platina, C A : St. Herman o f Alaska Brotherhood,
2018 . 1Originally published as: între timp şi veşnicie: viaţa Părintelui Arse
nie Papacioc / Sorin Alpetri [Between time and eternity: the life o f Father
Arsenic Papacioc] (Bucharest: Accent Print Press, 1015). | Includes biblio
graphical references and index.
Identifiers: ISB N : 978-1-887904-60-5 | L C C N : 2018955130
Subjects: L C S H : Papacioc, Arsenie, 19 14 -2 0 11. | Biserica Ortodoxă
Română— Clergy— Biography. | Orthodox Eastern Church— Rom a
nia— Clergy— Biography. | M onks— Romania— Biography. | Priests—
Romania— Biography. | Political prisoners— Romania— Biography. |
Communism— Romania. | Communism— Soviet Union. | Political per
secution— Romania— H istory— 20th century. | Persecution— Rom ania—
H istory— 20th century. | Romania— Politics and government.
Classification: L C C : BX699.P37 A 4 6 2018 | D D C : 281.9092/498— dc23
CONTENTS
Introduction 7
Map and Romanian Pronunciation Guide n
E t e r n it y in t h e M o m e n t :
The Life and Wisdom o f Elder Arsenie Papacioc
i. An Upright Man ij
I. From Mayor to Prisoner 31

3. Entering upon the Path 38
4. Exile 71
5. True Elders 81
6. A New Man 89
7. The Sound o f Falling Leaves 97
8. Dwelling in Unity no
9. A Monk above A ll Else 115
10. Alive in Death 138
ii. Release 17 1
II. Peace amidst Trials 182
13. Pursued 192
14. A Servant to All 205
15. Laboring in Twilight 236
Appendix 1: A Final Visit with Elder Cleopa 267

Appendix 2: Recollections o f Two Spiritual Sons 273
Index 279
5
Fr. Arsénié in February 2005.
INTRODUCTIO N
Be constantly vigilant, at every moment'. You can lose

your salvation in a heartbeat, a mere second in which you're
not watchful! The moment is very important, i f you know
how to live it. Therefore, live the moment to rectify the past
and to conquer the fu tu re! Don’t think about what w ill be.
Leave the fu tu re to solve its own problem s! L ive this mo
ment properly, and leave your life in God's hands!
—Elder Arsenie
une 1958. It was the dead o f night when two sedans and
J three trucks pulled into a remote monastery in the Roma

nian countryside. The Communist regime was enjoying abso
lute power in a country beaten down by widespread physical
and psychological torture. The government carried out noth
ing in the light: all orders and plans were executed in a haze
o f secrecy and lies. The events o f this night were no different.
Eighty-nine officers emerged from the five vehicles and came to
the gates o f the monastery. They were looking for one man: Fr.
Arsenie (Papacioc). It was two in the morning, and Fr. Arsenie
was just leaving church. Finding a small army waiting to escort
him to interrogation and prison, he said with amusement, “ The
mountain shook and out came a mouse.” The power o f Fr. A r
senic’s uncompromising Christian witness was such that he in
spired extraordinary fear in a government whose very rule was
based on terror.
Born on the eve o f the First World War, Archimandrite
Arsenie Papacioc was a light for Romania and for the whole
7
ETERNITY IN THE MOMENT
world, throughout the twentieth century, and even up until

our own times, reposing on July 19, 2.011,1 at the age o f ninety-
seven. As a young man he excelled as a scholar-athlete, and was
dubbed “the Blond Panther” for his agility on the rugby field.
He later trained as an artist, and eventually became a young
mayor. His promising secular career was cut oft when he was
arrested in 1938 and again in 1941. Prison became a spiritual
academy for him, and after his release he dedicated his life to
God as a monastic. For the next six decades he would labor as
a monk— in prison and out o f prison, he remained dedicated
to his calling. Every endeavor o f his life was characterized by an
intensity o f purpose and unwavering confession o f the truth: a
knowledge that within each moment we make our choice for
eternity. And this principle was a theme he would return to
again and again when speaking with his spiritual children:
“ The objective is to be able to conquer eternity on a dai
ly basis. This is the ideal. The idea o f becoming somebody in
life— a professor, etc.— is a human goal, not the ultimate goal.
The aim is to serve the highest possible Good. If you do not
know how to serve God, Who is eternal, you’ll get stuck. You
have to be attentive: ‘Wait a minute! Since this doesn’t pertain
to Eternity, I won’t do it!’”
The majority o f the biographical material presented in this
Life o f Fr. Arsenie is taken from his personal recollections, as
siduously recorded by his disciples. Having lived to the age o f
ninety-seven, it was difficult for him to recall the precise dates
o f certain events. Once, he was asked, “ Father, in what year did
this happen?” He replied, “ I don’t remember! As Eminescu12
would say, ‘When you don’t know your life story by heart, let
others take the trouble o f figuring it out!”’
1 A il dates in this book are according to the Gregorian, or New, Calen

dar.
2 M ihai Eminescu (1850-1889) was probably the most renowned and
influential Romanian poet, novelist, and journalist o f the nineteenth century.
8
INTRODUCTION
Some readers may wonder why the elder would recount

some o f the exalted spiritual states he had experienced. In ac
tuality, he rarely spoke o f his most intense spiritual struggles
and experiences. These particular reminiscences were often told
only once to help a person in the midst o f a crisis or tempta
tion. The elder, who had sacrificed himself entirely for Christ,
was in no way interested in promoting himself or attracting
more disciples. In fact, he desired to preserve these spiritual
treasures in his heart, so as to not lose the reward o f bearing his
cross with dignity, honor, love o f enemies, and hope in God.
Many o f these stories came to light only after his repose, when
his confidants finally revealed the wealth he had shared with
them.
Fr. Arsenie spent the last decades o f his life in the relative
tranquility o f Techirghiol Monastery on the coast o f the Black
Sea, where he diligently labored as the spiritual father for the
nuns and the multitude o f the faithful who flocked to his cell.
He had a word o f exhortation for everyone— a talent he had
possessed from his youth— which was made all the more pow
erful by the fact that he had proved the reality o f his advice
by his own life. The government no longer persecuted him,
but he gave himself no rest, spending all o f his time serving in
church or receiving visitors in his cell. All those who came to
him for consolation in their struggles found a counselor who
had known a depth o f suffering few will ever experience. With
his experiential knowledge o f Jesus Christs presence in our suf
fering, he was able to instill in his listeners an understanding o f
the resurrection that comes through embracing the Cross.
May the Life and words o f Fr. Arsenie be an encourage
ment to press forward on the path o f salvation as we all bear
the crosses given us. For Fr. Arsenie the cross and sufferings he
bore were a great treasure that brought him to knowledge o f
God. For every generation the paradox o f joyful suffering has
been the most difficult o f Christ’s teachings to accept: “ Man
9
runs from suffering like a coward. We’re not telling you to look
for it, but if it has found you, defeat it!” But the great and
awesome path o f the Cross begins quite simply and practically,
as Fr. Arsenie would say: “Have a smile hidden in your heart
for everybody, literally for everybody, and this is already great
progress— instead o f persisting in excessive contemplation.
Wonderful things are conquered, not begged for, while keep
ing peacefully, vigilantly, and joyfully on your simple path. If
you bear Christ the Lord [in your heart] in such a manner, He
will enkindle it.”
Riassaphore-monk Adrian
io
Ukraine
Hungary
Serbia
Bulgaria
Map o f Romania, showing locations central to Ft. Arsenie’s life.
R o m a n ia n P r o n u n c ia t io n G u id e
â and î Like the “i” in “sill.”

à Like the “u” in “run.”
? sh
t ts
Fr. Arsenic speaking with his spiritual children.
CH APTER ONE
AN UPRIGHT MAN
A r c h i m a n d r i t e A r s e n i e P a p a c i o c was born on the

i l Feast o f the Dormition o f the Mother o f God, Au
gust 15, 19 14 ,1 in the village o f Misleanu, Perieţi commune,
Ialomiţa County, in southern Romania. Bom under the pro
tection o f the Mother o f God, Fr. Arsenie had great reverence
for her throughout his life, spending his last thirty years at a
monastery dedicated to her Dormition.
He was the seventh and youngest child o f Vasile and
Stanca Papacioc, who gave him the name Anghel at baptism.
Throughout his life, many people called him “an angel,” re
ferring to the purity o f his life, which confirmed his name.
The heavens seemed to comprehend the greatness o f the child
being born, as a solar eclipse coincided with his birth— caus
ing his father to exclaim, “ Ih e sun disappeared and my son
appeared!”
Vasile Papacioc was the descendent o f a wealthy family
originally from Macedonia in northern Greece, o f Aromanian
descent12 with the surname Albu. Fr. Arsenie’s great-grand
father was a priest and was known as Popa cu cioc (bearded
priest), which eventually became shortened to “ Papacioc.” His
1 Despite the fact that the civil registry records his birthdatc as August
13 ,19 14 , Fr. Arsenie knew from his mother and always asserted that his birth
day was August 15. In those days births were not always registered accurately.
2 Tire Aromanians, or Mace do-Romanians, are from Latin enclaves in
the Balkan Peninsula. In Romania they were often called Macedonians be
cause many came to Romania from the region o f Macedonia.— E d .
13
grandfather, a shepherd, emigrated to Romania, bringing with

him thousands o f sheep. Fr. Arsenie recalled asking a local
farmer how many sheep his grandfather, Mircea, had possessed.
In reply the farmer told him that he had once asked Mircea
about combining their individual flocks into one large flock.
“How many sheep do you have?” Mircea had asked the farmer.
When the farmer had replied that he had seventy, Mircea said,
“My [sheep] dogs alone number seventy!”
There were two girls and four other boys in the family. The
first child, a boy, died in infancy on the day his mother was
giving birth to the second child. “Can you imagine my poor
mother, giving birth while one child lay dead on the table!”
Anghcl grew up as a country boy, living in communion
with his family and nature. “ We were seven children, and we
grew up mostly outside.” He believed that children received
great benefit from spending their youth in an open environ
ment, preferably in nature, where they could grow harmoni
ously in body and spirit.
His parents, Vasile and Stanca, possessed the fear o f God
and kept the ancient traditions and customs. They worked
hard in order to offer their children all they needed. “ Every
year at Pascha our parents bought us new clothes and boots.
Even though some things were passed down from the older
children to the younger, no year passed by without us getting
new clothes.” His father was the medical attendant— a posi
tion which included the work o f the doctor, veterinarian, and
dentist— for six villages, an important position at a time when
doctors were rare in rural areas. W ith the earnings from his po
sition, he generously contributed to the construction o f the vil
lage church. His oldest daughter followed in his footsteps and
studied medicine, but lung disease ended her life prematurely,
at the age o f twenty-seven. Fr. Arsenie would say, “ I thank God
for having Christian parents. What you receive from your fam
ily remains with you for rhe rest o f your life.”
H
AN UPRIGHT MAN
Vasile and Stanca Papacioc.
Anghcl’s mother, Stanca, was from the village o f Dragu$ in

Fagara; County, Transylvania. She was Anghel’s first instruc
tor in the life of a Christian. She raised him in the Christian
virtues, explaining the world in terms ot spiritual meanings, as
Fr. Arsenic· would recount: “ When I saw a sheep pawing the
ground with its hoof before going to sleep, I asked my mother,
‘ Why is it pawing?’ And my mother said, 'It’s worshipping, my
child!’ So why should I not worship as well?” He would go
to the village church— not encouraged by anyone, but out of
spiritual need. “ In my youth I was the only one in the village
who went to church. No old women, no men, only me. Once
some people in the village were talking about the priest, saying,
‘Only one person comes to church, and not even he stays to
the end!’ I thought the service was over when the priest came
out [from the Holy Altar] with the Holy Gifts, and so I went
home. After hearing this, knowing that the speaker was refer
ring to me, I never left church until after the priest left, just to
be sure.”
Young Anghel’s inclination for the spiritual life was
understood and respected by his friends. When they would

set o ff in “procession” on the village streets, they would always
choose Anghel to be “the priest.”
His early experiences o f education molded his theories on
Christian instruction. Later in life, during his discussions with
teachers o f religion, Fr. Arsenie insisted that they not empha
size historical facts in their classes, but rather convey to the
children the idea o f a living and omnipotent God.
As a young child Anghel was already making decisions
with a developed Christian conscience. Fr. Arsenie recalled: “ I
was five or six years old when a boy beat me. The children from
neighboring villages had the bad habit o f starting fights when
they would meet. The boy caught me at the edge o f the forest,
and with a thorny locust branch he bloodied my legs— I was
wearing shorts. Since my father had authority over six villages
as the medical attendant, I said to myself, ‘I ’m not telling my
papa, because he’ll beat him, and this is not pleasing to God.
I would rather endure it.’ Imagine what I was able to contem
plate at that age, when the desire for revenge is so strong! It was
not the result o f education, which I only had the opportunity
to complete in prisons and monasteries!” Already the greatest
Christian virtue— love for one’s enemies—was working in him,
something he would practice for the rest o f his life.
While still quite young, Anghel’s life was endangered nu
merous times. Later he understood that God had protected
him in all those dangerous situations: “No movement, no event
is an accident.... God guides us in an exceedingly mystical and
secret manner on the right path. We have all been saved from
many misfortunes because God didn’t permit affliction to
come upon us. We had a cow named Joiana. She would not
let anyone milk her, except my mother. Once she took me by
the horns and caught my belt. Her horn could have punctured
my belly, but my mother came quickly and saved me from her
horns.”
16
AN UPRIGHT MAN
Another time some horses almost trampled him. “From

childhood I was an accomplished horseman. Once I was bring
ing the horses to the pasture so they could trot around. I was
riding one horse, with another one by my side. A neighbor saw
me and said, Anghel, take my horses too!’ So I took them.
Then I ran into another neighbor who asked me to take his
horses also. Even though I knew how to control the horses,
finding myself with so many, little as I was, I fainted out o f
nervousness and fell oft my horse. The horses all passed over
me, but didn’t trample me. Another time they went around me
and did me no harm.”
Some time later he was almost killed while threshing in the
fields. Hie threshing machine had a chain that needed to be set
at a precise length, but Anghel erroneously fixed it at a shorter
distance. This caused the thresher to lift him up together with
the chain. Tire machine was in motion and he was about to be
crushed. He thought quickly, “I ’ll die if I hold on to the chain.
I’d rather let go from up here.” He let go, fell, and injured him
self, but his life was spared.
Fr. Arsenie was gifted with a prodigious memory and could
even remember events from the First World War, when he
was only three or four: “Our father would dig trenches in the
ground for the boys, and he would hide the girls in the straw
barn. I would gaze up from the trenches and see the dust from
an explosion, thinking about keeping it out o f my eyes.”
He also recounted a curious habit from his early child
hood: “ When I was little I always stuck my tongue out, even
while asleep. I have a photograph together with my siblings,
and my tongue is out.” This was an opportunity for his father
to predict about the future preacher: “ Know that this one will
be a great talker in life!”
Anghel excelled in school. In the first grade he received
a prize for his studies and was awarded a crown. At the cer
emony he recited a poem taught him by his older sister:
17
Beautiful little flower, who has given you life and

brilliant colors?
The One Who has enlivened you, has enlivened me
also,
He is your Father and mine, and His name is God!
In the fourth grade his class, together with their teacher,

dug a well. Fr. Arsenic remembered, “He trusted us so much
that we dug a well together. Can you imagine? We were ten
years old.... And the entire neighborhood o f that village still
drinks water from the well.”
Around this time the first signs o f his artistic talent were
displayed. “Once I drew on the door— our father did not allow
us to write on the door— the heads o f a cat and o f a horse. My
father didn’t reprimand me when he saw it; rather, he admired
it. This is when I started to realize I had a gift for drawing.”
His talent enabled him to go to Bucharest in 1917 and
study sculpture at Polizu High School, an art and trade school.
During this period he received extensive instruction in the
theory o f art. Later, after graduating high school, he began to
acquire skills in sculpture.
In Bucharest he stayed in the dorm, like all the other stu
dents from rural areas. Here he developed a deep friendship
with one o f his classmates. One year at Pascha they were left
with no food. “My mother didn’t know about it. If she had,
she would have been very sad. I bought about two pounds of
plums and we ate plums on Pascha.” They made an oath to be
come monastics. “We were about thirteen or fourteen, and we
thought about becoming monks. Can you imagine? We had
not even seen a monastery, or a monk; we didn’t know what
the monastic life was about, but you can already see in me the
thought o f becoming a monk. Later on my friend got married
at Râşnov. I always commemorate him.”
Once a hypnotist came to the high school where he was
18
AN UPRIGHT MAN
studying. “ We, the young people, were curious. And he called

some o f us, including me, to the instructors desk (there was a
large instructor’s desk in the drawing classroom). He was wav
ing his hands, trying to mesmerize our souls. I was conscien
tious— and so I went more as a joke, not wanting to stand out
from the other students. There were teachers and hundreds,
maybe a thousand, students. But he couldn’t hypnotize me
at all. He chased me away: ‘Go away!’ I didn’t know why he
couldn’t hypnotize me, but he was able to do it to the oth
ers. Later on I realized that I had an inner presence, a presence
given by God.... There are souls that do not give in to these
demonic movements.”34
As he matured, the precision and depth o f his mind be
gan to be revealed. Once, during a meeting o f the weekly jour
nal Vraja (Charm)—where Anghel was a non-voting student
member and his older brother was an editor— a dispute arose.
Anghel’s brother stated, “Even if I take a drop from the sea, it
is still something!” The others began to argue with him, saying
that it was nothing. Eventually they turned to Anghel for his
opinion, and he said: “An analysis o f the sea is performed on a
drop taken from it. Therefore, the chemical content o f the sea’s
water is known based on a single drop. Based on your theory,
even if you take a whole wagon or an entire train it’s nothing!
It’s not a question o f quantity, but that of taking or not!”
Anghel was inspired by his brother to read all the books he
could find in the “ Library for A ll” series, including renowned
classics. He was particularly impressed by Victor Hugo’s Les
Misérables. Later on, when he was about twenty-eight, he read
the Patericon'— which laid the foundation for his spiritual
growth.
3 N e vorbeşte Părintele A rsénié [Father Arsénié talks to us], vol. 3

(Vânători: Mănăstirea Sihăstria, 10 0 4 ), p. 83.
4 The Patericon: the lives and sayings o f the Fathers o f the fourth- and
fifth-century Egyptian desert.— E d .
19
His gift for writing enabled him to win a poetry contest

at the journal. Until old age, he continued to nurture this gift,
expressing spiritual realities and counsels in an original fash
ion. His letters to his spiritual children eloquently prove his
exquisite writing. He used his prodigious intellect to memorize
the poems o f renowned poets, like Eminescu, George Co$buc,
Ovidiu, and others, which he preserved to the end o f his life,
quoting them when offering counsel to his spiritual children.
He spent his vacations in his village, Misleanu, joining in
the life o f the village. “I was shy in my youth, reserved in con
versing with girls. I thought to myself, ‘How can I go speak
to a girl?!’ The girls would pester me to go dancing,5 but I
would generally sit with the elderly men and women, who
would call me over to talk to them, saying, ‘Well, Anghel, how
are things?’ My mother wasn’t pleased with this; she would’ve
liked me to go and dance with the girls. She’d say, ‘Look, my
Anghel is sitting with the old folk!’ But God was preserving
me for monasticism.”
Nonetheless, he had a special relationship with his moth
er, remembering her with fondness and longing, “ We were
also friends. She talked to me about everything. I had a good
mother.”
He showed great respect to everyone, inheriting his father’s
custom o f greeting people before they would greet him. When
he would see his godfather on the street, even if he were on the
opposite side, he would run and kiss his hand.
Even in his youth, Anghel already displayed the pastoral
gift God had bestowed upon him. He recounted, “Every man is
born in the world with a purpose; he is not born in vain. I had
a different character than my siblings. Every evening I was in
vited to a different house in the village. The people would say,
‘Anghel is coming to tell us about G o d!’... One day I would go
5 That is, to Romanian folk dancing, specifically, a round dance known
as the hora.— T r a n s .
zo
AN UPRIGHT MAN
co one house, the next, to another. I had a schedule arranged a

few days in advance.”
These visits were not without danger: “In the winter, there
were many wolves in the area surrounding our village. Our
house had three exits and at each door we had a club co ward
off wolves. Once, some boys were coming to take me to a
house, to talk to them about God. I heard the dogs barking,
and I went outside, thinking that the boys had arrived, but it
wasn’t them: it was a wolf. Since I had not brought the club, I
quickly grabbed an acacia branch with many limbs. When the
w olf came at me, I thrust the branch in front o f it. The dogs
came and bit the wolf, and it ran away.... I was able to stop it
with the branch, but I could not have scopped it with the club,
even if I had brought it. Only later did I realize how much
God had helped me.”
One winter evening one o f Anghcl’s younger brothers went
to find a rabbit shot by a hunter. Since he was late, Anghel
went to find him. The snow on the field was very thick and
through the fog he saw wolves coming toward him. He stepped
aside and waited, shivering. Due to the fog the wolves contin
ued coward the spot where they had initially seen him, but
they did not find him.
Throughout his life, Fr. Arsenie cultivated, nurtured, and
perfected love— love o f enemies. Fundata Lake was about half
a mile from their family home. One summer vacation Anghel
was walking with other village youth along the shore. A drunk
en villager named Marinache approached them, wrongfully ac
cusing them o f stealing one o f his sheeps bells. Although they
denied it, he jumped on them to beat them. The young people
ran away, splitting in two groups. Some went toward a nearby
knoll, but Anghel ran toward the lake. When he got to the
shore, he undressed, jumped into the water and began to swim.
The villager did not swim after him, but followed him, run
ning along the shore. Anghel traversed the lake, but when he
II
got to the other side, two men caught him and held him un
til Marinache came and beat him with a stick. Upon returning
home he told his family what had happened. His father and
brothers were enraged and wanted to punish the villager. This
could have been carried out quite easily, since his father was a
well-respected man in the village, but, in the end, he was never
punished, because Anghel forgave him. Later on, while serving
in the army, Marinachc’s son was under Anghel’s supervision.
Anghel constantly helped and protected him. “Now [in the
year zooo], at the Liturgy I always remember Marinache first
when I begin my commemorations o f those from my village.”
At the end o f his academic breaks, Anghel would return to
school in Bucharest. His father greatly desired his children to
have an education, making great efforts to keep them in good
schools in Bucharest. But one winter, while returning from
work, he fell in the snow. No one was there to help him and he
caught a terrible cold, and eventually contracted tuberculosis.
He was taken for treatment to a rehabilitation center for pul
monary diseases, but, despite all the medical help, he could not
fight the illness and died at age fifty-six.
After their fathers repose, the Papacioc children could not
afford to continue their studies. Anghel finished high school
and returned to the village.
As Anghel matured spiritually and intellectually, he also
saw the importance o f athletic training. Tire self-discipline and
perseverance he acquired during these years were qualities that
would aid him in his monasticism, imprisonment, and life in
the wilderness. After high school he played for the Slobozia
soccer team. Slobozia was the most prominent city in the re
gion, and Anghel had to walk six and a half miles from Mislea-
nu to get there. He had a natural talent for the game, and one
o f his teammates would exclaim, “Every time Papacioc plays,
we win the game.” He eventually gave up soccer to focus on
rugby. “ I had very good footwork; they even wanted to take
zz
AN UPRIGHT MAN
me to Sweden.” He was a substitute for the Romanian rugby

team in a game against France.
But even during his adolescence, he did not separate his
athletic life from his spiritual strivings:
“ I played sports until I was twenty. At that time, I was the
first in sprinting and second in jumping at the interscholastic
competition, which took place in Bucharest. The fact that I
was exercising, not just studying, was tremendously beneficial!
During one rugby game, due to my momentum and speed, I
couldn’t avoid running into a player, so I jumped over him. A f
ter that, the newspapers called me the Blond Panther— due to
my blond hair. One day during practice, I kicked the ball very
hard and accidentally hit a girl—who should not have been on
the field— in the head. I felt the need to go and apologize to
her. I thought she was about fourteen or fifteen years old.
“She said, ‘The Blond Panther!’
“I replied, ‘That’s not my name. My name is Anghel Papa-
cioc!’
“She continued, ‘Does this [the fact that she was hit by the
ball] mean that I’m now an athlete, too?’
“ I saw her naïveté and told her, ‘No, for the moment you
are just a person who got hit. Go, young girl, and pray to the
Mother o f G o d !’ I insisted that she pray to the Theotokos, as
was my custom to do in the locker room.
“I didn’t see her after that, until, seventy years later, she
showed up at Techirghiol [Monastery] with two granddaugh
ters holding her hands, and said, ‘Father, I ’m the girl you hit in
the head with the ball! I prayed to the Mother o f God, as you
advised me; she helped me and I ’ve succeeded in all things!’”
One year his rugby team was playing in the championship.
He had played in all the playoff games on the starting team,
but at the time o f the final he was doing his military service.
He asked for permission from the major to go and play the
championship game, taking the train and joining his team on
the field. The game began. “I don’t know how I managed to

make such a good catch, but then there was an opponent in
front o f me. I jumped over him, and scored three points. There
was a scuffle, but the result remained }-o and we won the cup.”
A career in sports beckoned, but Anghel had other plans,
and he never allowed himself to be overcome by the crowns o f
victory. Despite his success, he sincerely reflected, “Anghel, you
have to give it up!” (Later he would say, “I rejoice that I made this
decision”) Divine providence and his own will— in a synergy he
would later comprehend— guided him on another path in life.
At the age o f nineteen, Anghel joined the Legion o f the
Archangel Michael (the Legionnaires), a movement originally
created to spiritually transform Romania through the Christian
formation o f the youth. After the death o f the founder, Corne-
liu Zelea Codreanu, in 1958, the movement became more po
litical and eventually turned violent.
Nevertheless, the early Legionnaire movement inculcated
Christian virtues into many o f the young men who would later
become new martyrs or righteous elders. The guiding princi
ples o f the Legion during this time were o f a noble character:
“Knowing and fulfilling the Gospel commandments, reading
the Psalter, going to Church, Confession, Communion, fast
ing, good manners, love o f neighbor, and almsgiving were man
datory for all those who wanted to be called Legionnaires."6
Among the members, there were exceptional people o f noble
aspiration who became models o f ethics, courage, and heroism
for the young Anghel.
Now a spiritual ideal took shape in his soul, an ideal he fol
lowed all his life and expressed so beautifully later: “Our desire
was that God grant us the blessing o f dying torn into pieces
and tortured for the spark o f Truth that we knew abode in us,
6 M onk Filoteu Bălan, M ărturia unui cre/tin. Părintele M arcu de la

Sihăstria [The confession o f a Christian. Father Marcu o f Sihăstria] (Petru
Vodă: Petru Vodă Monastery, 10 0 7 ), p. 10.
14
AN UPRIGHT MAN
for Whose defense we would enter into a life-and-death battle

with the ruling powers o f darkness. This was my motto!”
He loved the Legionnaire spirit o f teamwork and sacrifice.
“ Immediately after I joined the Legion I went to Bucharest to
receive proper Legionnaire training.”" First he went to the Le
gion’s headquarters, where he met Corneliu Zelea Codreanu,
their leader. He considered him “a true hero, a remarkable
personality who would win you over on the spot. When we
finished talking, he told me, ‘Go and lay the foundation!’”8
Anghel began to “lay the foundation”—participating in the
Legionnaire camps. “ The Legionnaire camps rebuilt church
es, repaired schools, maintained cemeteries, built roads and
bridges.”'’ Even though he was still young, Anghel knew that
you could not succeed in life unless you were completely dedi
cated. “ Life is not about talking, but about advancing. Do
you want to achieve a goal? Get going! Don’t stand idle! We
achieve our goal not by talking but by advancing.” 10 His goal
was not a random one, but the Resurrection.
As a Legionnaire, Anghel continued to maintain a balance
in his life. “I was a Legionnaire and I do not regret it, but I
did not allow the Legionnaire training to suppress Christian
principles. That would have been a deadly error. Do you want
to be a good Legionnaire? You have to be a good Christian
soldier, like the warrior-martyrs o f old. It’s similar to the army.
Arhiva Consiliului Naţional Pentru Studierea Arhivelor Securităţii

[The Archives o f the National Council for Studying the Securitate Archives]
(a c n sa s ). Informam file 13 4 13 1, pp. 7-8 .
8 Hieromonlt Justin and Monk Kirion, “C e atâta frică de moarte? De
câte ori n-am murit până acum?” [W hy fear death so much? H ow many times
haven’t I died so far?] (interview with Father Arscnie Papacioc), A titu din i
[Outlook], August 10 11, p. 16.
9 Francisco Veiga, Istoria G ărzii de F ier [The history o f the Iron Guard],
(Bucharest: Humanitas Press, 1995), p. 1 10 .
10 Hicromonk Justin and M onk Kirion, “C e atâta frică de moarte?" p.
17·
2-5
First you do your military service, following its rules. Upon

your release you return to your birthplace.” 11 Unfortunately,
the Legionnaire movement was later known for its crimes. Fa
ther did not condone them. “Errors were also committed in
the Legionnaire Movement, as murder was encouraged, but I
don’t know what was behind these crimes, nor about the inner
intrigues people talked about.” 112
In later years Fr. Arsenie would recount the importance o f
the Legionnaire movement in his development.
“The Legion helped me enormously; it was truly a severe
and intimate struggle in order for us to give birth to a new
man from within the already-existing one. It [this rebirth] was
something necessary in my life. The principles o f Legionnaire-
training were extraordinary. It was a system o f training that en
gaged you. This brought me out o f a latent adolescent state,
where I felt I wanted something but didn’t know what. This
is when the Legion appeared, with its fervor, with its valor,
under the protection o f the Archangel Michael. This aspect o f
the movement won me over completely, since I had known the
troparion13 o f the archangel from childhood.
“I knew Codreanu, I had many discussions with him, and I
held him in great esteem. We cannot consider the Legion apart
from the will o f God; therefore, it was the will o f God, even
though it sprang from certain secular, historical causes.
“I was not in agreement with murders o f revenge.14 I had
a brother, a Legionnaire, who was shot by police soldiers.
When the Legionnaires rose to power, I could have avenged
my brother’s death.” 15
11 Ibid., p. 16.
12 Ibid.
13 Troparion: a central hymn to God or to the saints or the angels.— E d .
14 That is, the violent acts o f the Legionnaires.— T r a n s .
15 M onk Moses, Sfântul închisorilor [The saint o f the prisons], (Sibiu:
Editura Agnos, 10 0 9 ), pp. 4 5-46.
16
AN UPRIGHT MAN
Nevertheless, he continued to live according to the Lord’s

commandment, Love your enemies. “I could have simply killed
him.... Instead I sent him this message: ‘ 1 am setting guards
at your gate! By no means should anything happen to you!’...
What power did I possess?... 1 pondered: if I take revenge on
him, heaven will no longer be indebted to me, and neither will
my brother.... And he [the killer] died, after many years, from
remorse....
“If you don’t take revenge, God will remain indebted to
you. All vengeance is His. Revenge does not solve your prob
lem. On the contrary, if you take revenge you continue to be
greatly in debt to God. Therefore, [if you don’t take revenge]
God owes you. If we don’t do our duty o f fulfilling the com
mandment to love— for we have to love even our enemies and
evil-doers— the devil gains the advantage o f a very dangerous
line o f attack: he fiercely accuses you without giving you a
chance to explain: ‘You have given a man over to death!’ And
you can’t tell [the devil] that you didn’t do it, because you can’t
justify yourself to the devil, since he views things the way they
are. Thus, you have to consider the commandment o f love in
order to cut the devil off!
“On the other hand, you’re allowed to defend yourself
from evil-doers, for the Savior says, I f the goodman o f the bouse
had known in what watch the th ief would come, he would have
watched, and would not have suffered his house to be broken up
(Matt. 14:45). Clearly, you won’t just try to stop him if he
attacks you; rather, you’ll fight him. Yes, you have to defend
yourself. 'Thus, he could be injured. By all means, you’re al
lowed to defend yourself!”
Later, Anghel was sent to organize the Legionnaire move
ment in Ialomiţa County. Due to his leadership skills he was
made a Legionnaire instructor, a very prominent rank in the
Legion, becoming the C h ief o f Legionnaire training in that
county. During the elections in that county the military police
lined up in front o f the Legionnaires, trying to stop them from

voting. Anghel was leading the Legionnaire group, and a mili
tary policeman pricked him in the rib with a bayonet. Then,
trembling with fear, the soldier dropped his rifle. Anghel took
it and handed it back to him— reprimanding him: “ Your father
is my father also, and your mother is my mother. Take your
rifle!” The soldier had inflicted a serious wound near Anghel’s
abdomen, which left a scar.
At the age o f twenty-two Anghel was called to fulfill his
military duties. His superiors commended him for his skill and
earnestness, and he was promptly promoted— receiving impor
tant missions, which he accomplished successfully. Later, he ap
plied some o f the realities he encountered there to the spiritual
life, being called the m ilitary monk. He would say, “God saves
man through man. In order to be capable of saving someone,
we have to put ourselves in order— becoming a foundation for
the Savior in saving him. Man is saved through man. It is a type
o f anchor.’ A mounted gun recoils when it’s fired, so it’s fixed
on an anchor that keeps it in place. Man is a kind o f anchor,
and God ‘fires the gun’ toward other people.” 1*’ Later on he be
came such an anchor, after being conditioned through absolute
obedience as a monk, endurance o f unjust sufferings, patience,
solitude in the wilderness, and hidden prayer. God used him
as a strong anchor, steadfast in the midst o f tempests, with his
eyes constandy directed to the Lord—Whom he solely desired.
In the midst o f his military service, Anghel’s commanding
officer, a major, reposed. Anghel was appointed to his posi
tion, even though he was a simple sergeant. His first report im
pressed the general, who praised him in front o f all the officers.
He asked him, “If you were a general, what would you teach
the soldiers?”
16 Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc, interview with Asociaţia Studenţilor

Creştini Ortodocşi din România [The Association o f Orthodox Christian
Students in Romania] (a sc o r ), 1994.
AN UPRIGHT MAN
Anghel Papacioc while

serving in the army.
“ I would teach them to die,” Anghel replied. “ If soldiers

didn’t fear death, they wouldn’t be so cowardly. They would
fight better and win.”
The general continued, “Do you want to stay in the army?”
“N o !”
“ W hy?”
“Because you aren’t free. I saw that even you have to stand
at attention before another general.”
During the reign o f King Carol II, Romania imported all
its military supplies from the Czech Republic. To become in
dependent from the Czechs, the king decided to establish a
munitions factory in Romania, in the mountains near Braşov.
Anghel was about to be employed in this undertaking.
After completing his military service Anghel studied for
19
two years at the Faculty o f Chemistry in Bucharest, at the

newly founded Department o f Pyrotechnics. When he com
pleted his studies he moved to the factory in Braşov, where his
brother, Radu, was the chief foreman.
Anghel’s expertise and seriousness bore fruit here as well.
He was able to halve the production time for mercury fulmi
nate— the main substance used in manufacturing explosives.
Consequendy, production increased dramatically, and he was
rewarded: his salary increased from two thousand lei,17 in the
beginning, to nine thousand lei, which was a considerable-
amount at the time. “ I lived well, I had money, I had a car”— a
rarity in those days, as were his two drivers.
One evening he was going to Poiana Braşov on a windy
road. The headlights were illumining the fir trees on the sides
o f the road. Sitting in the back seat, Anghel said to himself,
“Anghel, if you don’t become a monk, you’ll gain all the riches
o f this world in vain!”
17 The leu (plural lei) is the currency o f Romania. Two thousand lei in
1936 is equivalent to 35,000 U.S. dollars in aoi8, and nine thousand lei in 1936
is equivalent to 160,000 U.S. dollars in 10 18 .— E d .
jo
C H A PTER TW O
FR OM M A Y O R TO P R I S O N E R
1938 the authorities brought fabricated charges

I
N D ecem ber
against the Papacioc brothers. A false witness related that
he had heard one o f the brothers (he did not specify which
one) say that he had the opportunity to kill King Carol II dur
ing one o f his visits to the munitions factory in Braşov, but
that he had not done so because he had not received the order.
While taking a walk in a nearby forest, the innocent brothers,
Anghel and Radu, were surrounded and arrested. Frightened,
Radu whispered, “ They’ll shoot us, they’ll shoot us!” Anghel
courageously kept his calm, encouraging his older brother, say
ing, “Let it snow, let it snow on the soul forever.”
They were brought to the prison camp at Miercurea Ciuc.
Eventually, the investigation revealed the innocence o f both
brothers. They were released— but not at the same time (Radu
was released first)— and the slanderer was condemned to a year
imprisonment and given a thousand-lei fine and a five hundred-
lei charge in court fees.1
However, these investigations lasted two years; two years in
which Anghel was unjustly detained in the prison camp. While
suffering wrongfully at the hands o f his fellow-men and being
tormented by the devil, the grace o f God visited and comforted
him—purifying and deepening his prayer. “I would withdraw to
the attic o f the building and immerse myself in prayer ... and
the devil would torture me terribly. He would appear in front
o f me and I would wrestle with him there many times. Yes, we
1 a c n s a s , Penal file 0 0 0 10 1, vol. 6, pp. 4s, 50,5 1,5 7 .
31
fought for hours,” he told one o f his fellow prisoners.2 He was

only twenty-five at the time. This was just the beginning o f his
intimate knowledge o f the Romanian correction system. He
would undergo arrest over forty times throughout his life, being
imprisoned for fourteen years in all. While most people recall
their youth as a period o f joy and freedom, Fr. Arscnie would
say, “I spent a big part o f my youth being arrested and in prison.”
Many Legionnaires were incarcerated at Miercurea Ciuc.
They would spend their free time making crosses, crucifixes,
or icons, and also performing their daily prayer rule. Mircea
Eliade,3 interred there at the same time, recalled: “ In the eve
ning, the communal prayer would end with an impressive ‘God
is with us’ sung by three hundred voices. On the top floor there
was a room reserved for ‘unceasing prayer.’ A prisoner would
pray (or read the Scriptures or the Psalter) for an hour each
day, stopping only when his replacement would arrive. Many
would request to be scheduled between three and five o’clock
in the morning— the hardest time to stay awake.”4
By the time o f Anghel’s release, his brother, Radu, was al
ready dead. On the night o f September 2.1, 1919, Radu was tak
en to the Râşnoava Valley, where, together with nine other Le
gionnaires, he was shot. To cover up the crime, the authorities
stated that they were shot while trying to escape. They were
buried in a common grave in the Râşnov cemetery. All o f them
were intellectuals: two engineers, a doctor o f theology, three
lawyers, a captain, a college graduate, and two clerks. Anghel
2 a c n sa s , Informant file 18500;, v o l . p . 158.

3 Mircea Eliade (19 07-19 8 6) was a Romanian historian o f religion, phi
losopher, fiction writer, and professor at the University o f Chicago. In August
1938 he was interred in the camp at Miercurea Ciuc. He was released on N o
vember iz o f the same year, after being taken to a clinic the previous month
because he was coughing up blood.— E d .
4 Fabian Seiche, M a rtiri f i m ărturisitori rom âni din secolul X X [Rom a
nian martyrs and confessors in the twentieth century] (Făgăraş: Agaton Press,
1010), p. 39.
31
FROM MAYOR TO PRISONER
was grieved by the deaths o f his brother and all the other Le
gionnaires. Later on he would recount to his co-sufferers at
Aiud Prison how St. Nicholas, the protector o f the imprisoned,
preserved him from death at Miercurea Ciuc.
The following year a committee investigated the murders
and found those responsible for the crime.5 Marshal Ion An
tonescu6 gave the order to unearth the bodies o f the ten Le
5 ACNSAS, Penal file 400660, pp. 1 - 1 .

6 Ion Antoncscu (1881-1946) had been a prominent general and a
minister in the Romanian government in the 1930s. In 1940 he forced King
Carol, whose regime had become synonymous with corruption, to abdicate.
He became prime minister and conducător (leader) o f Romania from 1940 to
1944, forming a coalition government with the Legionnaires. The regime was
known as the National Legionary State, but only lasted until January 1941,
when Antonescu aligned himself with Hitler and purged the Legionnaires.
He was given the title M areşal (Marshal), the highest rank in the Army o f
Romania. Antonescu was later executed, in 1946, by the Com munist govern
ment as a war criminal.— E d .
33
gionnaires and bury them in a Christian manner— including

a coffin and a proper funeral service for each. On exhuming
Radu’s body it was found that his head had been punctured.
Anghel and his mother, Stanca, took part in the funeral, at
which Antonescu was also present. He shook Anghel’s hand,
saying, “We move forward with all o f you and with G o d !”
Touched by the funeral service, his mother whispered,
“What a beautiful funeral!" Those are the last words Fr. Arse
nic remembered his mother saying. A tall, black wooden cross
was erected on the grave, with an inscription on the base: “ In
memory o f those killed for an ideal and for their love of their
nation.”
The history o f those years is full o f tragic events. The gov
ernment o f King Carol II began to arrest the leaders and the ac
tive members o f the Legionnaire movement and confine them
in prison camps. They condemned Corneliu Codrcanu to ten
years o f forced labor and then killed him, together with thir
teen other Legionnaire prisoners, under the pretext that they
were attempting to escape while being transferred to another
prison. The murder o f Corneliu Codreanu was followed by the
assassination o f the Prime Minister, Armand Calinescu, by a
Legionnaire commando. The regime responded by executing
without a trial 151 people, almost the entire Legionnaire lead
ership. This bloody series o f events ended during the days be
tween November z6 and 18, 1940, after the installation o f the
new regime o f Ion Antonescu. At that time a rebellious group
o f Legionnaires lawlessly killed seventy-two people— represen
tatives o f the regime o f King Carol II. In the midst o f all this
bloody uproar Anghel preserved his integrity. He detached
himself from everything and remained anchored in eternity.
After his release from the camp at Miercurea Ciuc on April
18, 1940, Anghel worked as secretary for a lawyer. Then, when
the Legionnaires, in coalition with Antonescu, came to rule
the country, he was elected mayor o f Zarnefti— an area that
34
FROM MAYOR TO PRISONF.R
incorporated the villages o f Tohanu Vechi, Tohanu Nou, Bran,

and Poiana Mărului. It was now October.
At the age o f twenty-six, he was the youngest mayor in R o
mania, but key Legionaires supported him in his work. These
friendships later became even stronger in Aiud Prison, where
this group formed a center o f spiritual strength and resistance.
As a young mayor, Anghel strove to uphold justice. Zărneşti
had a large budget due to the forests in its administration. On
one occasion, someone came to request approval to cut down
all o f the pine trees from a parcel o f land. Anghel replied, “I ’m
not signing anything until I see what this is about.” He went
and saw that the lot was covered with beautiful, young pine
trees, and did not allow them to be cleared. “ I did not consent;
otherwise there would have been a huge loss from cutting them
while still so young.” There were times when the people did
not follow the requirements for cutting down trees, and the
young mayor would have to confiscate all the wood and give it
to the poor of Zărneşti.
There was a custom in the area o f preserving cheese in
pine bark. The excessive stripping o f the bark caused many
pine trees to die. Mayor Papacioc ordered all such activity to
cease; otherwise the office would give the offenders a hefty fine
and confiscate all their cheese. After discovering that someone
had disobeyed the directive, he called together all the counsel
ors. They went to the offenders house and confiscated all the
cheese— the whole basement was packed— and gave it to the
poor. “But,” Fr. Arsenic would recall, “I didn’t fine him.”
He would address the people every Sunday afternoon, en
couraging them to be honorable in their dealings with others
and giving them many profitable counsels. From the beginning,
he told his counselors not to take any bribes. “ We had a big
budget, so I gave them a good salary in order to keep them
from accepting bribes.” Once he asked a man who came to
him with a petition how much he had given the secretary for
35
helping him. The man answered, “One leu.” Mayor Papacioc

sent the man back to the secretary to have his leu returned to
him. Consequently, the secretary was upset because the mayor
was making such a big deal over a leu. “It was only a leu, but
it was perpetuating the sin.... I wanted to break their habit o f
taking bribes,” Fr. Arsenie later recounted.
While mayor, he rented a room from the towns pharma
cist. The pharmacists wife—seeing a young, handsome, and
well-mannered man— thought him to be worldly and tried to
tempt him. Once she sent the servant to call him to her room,
where she was waiting for him in bed. Perceiving her inten
tions, he came no farther into the room than the doorway. An-
ghel ironically asked, “Ma’am, are you ill?!” and left immedi
ately. The pharmacist was aware o f his wife’s character, and he
greatly appreciated Anghel for his chastity and righteousness.
Sixty years later Fr. Arsenie said, “ I have been commemorating
him with zeal at every service for the last sixty years.”
The so-called “Legionnaire rebellion” took place in Janu
ary 1941. At Governor Marian Traian’s order, Mayor Papacioc
went to Braşov with a group o f Legionnaires to support the
Legionnaire administration o f that county, which was dealing
with the political changes instituted by the new regime o f Ion
Antonescu. Upon their arrival at Braşov, they were split up and
sent to different institutions in the city to maintain order. A n
ghel was assigned to patrol the area surrounding the governor’s
office. In some areas o f the city there were confrontations be
tween Antonescu’s men and the Legionnaires.
On January 13 the new regime ordered the evacuation of
all the buildings occupied by the Legionnaires, and mayor Pa
pacioc and his men set o ff for Zărneşti. Neither he nor his
men took part in the violent confrontations between the two
sides.
On the road the army stopped the trucks, and the Legion
naires were arrested. Anghel was riding in a car behind them,
36
allowing him time to go to General Dragalina (the nephew

o f the renowned general by the same name) and obtain from
him a release authorization for his men. He took the released
Legionnaires home to Zarne$ti and told them, “I brought you
back safely; now you are free and healthy. From now on do
whatever you want.” (“My men and I did not shoot a single
bullet; we returned all the guns and ammunition intact. We re
turned as many as we’d received,” Fr. Arsenie later recollected.)
37
“According to the archival documents, there were no gunshots,

no soldier was disarmed, and Mayor Papacioc was not involved
in any armed incidents at Braşov.”78
Although Anghel’s part in the rebellion consisted of keep
ing the peace, the new authorities issued an arrest warrant in his
name, accusing him o f “revolt.” He voluntarily presented him
self to the authorities and, after the trial, he was condemned
to six years o f correctional imprisonment. He was taken to the
penitentiary in Braşov. While imprisoned, he labored and built
a chapel, and also carved the Royal Doors for the altar. “A l
though an inmate, I was running the prison there. How much
people trusted me, and how they listened to me! Not just in
administrative matters, but especially in spiritual and life issues.
There was literally a pilgrimage to my door, and 1 almost didn’t
find the time to listen to everyone and give them the appropri
ate counsel. I was wondering then: what do those men find in
me that they seek me ?”s
Based on a law suspending the execution o f sentences for
active-duty soldiers, he was released in August to go to the
front. He presented himself to the Fortieth Infantry Battalion
to join in the fighting. “The soldiers’ deployment center was at
Feteşti. I was assigned to the Fortieth Battalion, having to go
with it to Odessa. I set o ff and, before I arrived there, the bat
talion had entered into battle, where they were annihilated. I
was given another battalion, also in Odessa. I set o ff again, and
by the time I got there the battalion had gone into battle and
all o f them were killed. Then I returned to Feteşti, where the
colonel in charge o f these troop postings said, ‘God is protect
ing this man from death!’ And thus they let me return home.”
7 Adrian Nicolae Petcu, Părintele Arsenic Papacioc in docum entele

Securităţii (1938-19S8), Caietele CNSAS [Father Arsenie Papacioc in the Secu
ritate files (1938-1958), C N SA S Notebooks], (Bucharest: CNSAS Press, 1013),
P- *53-
8 a c n s a s , Informant file 185003, voi. 3, p. 49.
Years later Fr. Arsenie would say, “I wanted to go to the mon

astery, and that’s why God was protecting me.”
On August 15, 1941, Anghel was allowed to return to
Zârneçti. Upon arriving, he informed the authorities o f his
return, and soon he heard a rumor that they were looking to
incarcerate him. On September 2 he decided to go to his par
ents’ home in Perieti. That evening two police soldiers came
and informed him that his firearm license issued by the Le
gionnaire administration was no longer valid; he had to sur
render it together with his gun. Also, Anghel learned from his
younger brother that they were following him, intending to
kill him. On September 4, Anghel went to Brafov, stopping in
Zàrnefti— where he turned in his firearm license and his gun,
as he had been asked.
Despite the fact that Anghel had precisely complied with
the directives o f the new government, the authorities realized
they had made a mistake. In their rush to send people to the
front, they had released many Legionnaires who “did not meet
all the criteria” o f the law, suspending their sentences. Now
they were trying to find those who had survived and incarcer
ate them again. Anghel was also on their list because “he was
released in error”— as stated in a letter to the regiment.9 The
regiment declared that “Sergeant Papacioc presented himself
to the regiment, but his unit was not deployed and he was al
lowed to return home.” 10 However, the mandate remained val
id. Aware o f what was about to happen, he fled. “ Having poor
health and not wanting to suffer again the prison regimen and
to be the target o f persecution, I decided to hide in the moun
tains and live as a recluse. I lived this life on Piatra Craiului
Mountain.” 11 Divine providence continued to guide him every
where, as he entrusted himself completely to God.
9 Ibid., vol. 5, p. 7.
10 Ibid., vol. s, p. 5.
11 a c n s a s , Informant file 134131, pp. 7-8.
39
One day he encountered a hermit on the mountain. “ That

day I remained to pray with him amid the rocks, where I made
a thorough confession o f my state to him. When I asked to
stay with him, desiring to live a spiritual life, he consented for
us to remain together. He told me about the strength with
which we must arm ourselves in order to endure living such a
life, recounting to me the life o f St. Mary of Egypt, who stayed
in the desert without any help for forty-seven years. A great
battle to renounce everything earthly was taking place inside
me.... The first night I slept sheltered by a rock on Piatra Crai
ului. The next day we made a shelter for our belongings, where
we would later cook. I should mention that the hermit wasn’t
eating meat. We stayed in that area for two months, I think....
Due to a whole series o f spiritual reasons we had to move, de
parting for the Făgăraş Mountains, where we couldn’t stay be
cause o f the cold weather. We had to find a sheltered place,
down in the valley. Life in the mountains was very difficult and
almost unbearable for me, as 1 was weak.” 12 This was, by C o d ’s
providence, a foretaste o f the “most-sweet wilderness,” with its
fruitful deprivations and sufferings, to which he would flee in
the coming years.
Occasionally Anghel would come down from the moun
tains to get groceries in Braşov. Once, in February 1941, he met
a Legionnaire who suggested that he flee to Germany.13 Many
Legionnaires were able to escape the government’s surveillance
in this manner.
Anghel went to Timişoara, preparing to cross the border
12 Andrei Tudor, Mariana and Iuliana Conovici, Am înţeles rostul m eu ...

Părintele A rsenic Papacioc in dosarele securităţii [I understood my purpose ...
Father Arsenie Papacioc in the Securitate files], (Bucharest: Humanitas Press,
10 14 ), p. 75.
13 Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc, Scrisori către f ii i m ei duhovniceşti
[Letters to my spiritual children] (Constanţa: Dervent Monastery, 10 0 0 ), p.
1 4 1.
40
with Yugoslavia. Here he lived at the home of a former Legion

naire, a professor in the city. During this time he drew a sketch
o f the Holy Apostle Paul with a sword in his hand, the Gospel
in his bosom, and his finger pointing toward heaven. Offering
an explanation for the sketch, he wrote on the bottom o f the
page, Set your affections on things above, not on things on the
earth (Col. ;:i) . At this time he read the Patericon for the first
time. He would later draw wisdom from this book at Aiud,
strengthening and encouraging his co-sufferers with examples
from the Desert Fathers.
His attempt to cross the border was unsuccessful, but he
knew it was God’s will. It was now July 1941. “I wanted to flee
to Germany. I was able to send many there, but when it was
4i
my turn the lieutenant with whom I had made arrangements

had an inspection. A colonel, his superior, came and he had no
choice— he had to turn me in. It was God’s will! They wanted
to kill me, but I said I needed surgery on my appendix. My ap
pendicitis wasn’t acute; I had some pains, but it didn’t require
surgery. I told them this to escape death. They took me to the
hospital, and a renowned surgeon did the operation. He had
the following method: after the surgery all the patients had to
walk to their rooms, and mine was upstairs.”
After he recovered, he was taken to trial at Braşov. He was
found guilty o f attempting to cross the border illegally, and sen
tenced to six years o f imprisonment, at the age o f twenty-eight.
He was taken, together with other prisoners, to the forced
labor camp at Vaslui. To prevent them from escaping, their
feet were chained. “Our chains were riveted instead o f locked.
When it was my turn to be chained, the person was unable to
complete the task. First he couldn’t set the rivet, then a link
broke o ff the chain, and on the third attempt the handle of the
hammer broke. When the man saw this, he said, grieving, that
he was not going to continue trying to chain me. I begged him
to put them on; otherwise we would both be killed. As long as
I was praying silently he was unable to chain me but, seeing his
distress, I stopped praying and he was able to secure it.
“ They took us by train from Braşov to Vaslui for forced
labor. When we arrived at the station, some o f us went looking
for water. I wandered o ff from the others. In the meantime, a
truck came and loaded the prisoners, taking them to the other
side o f the city, where the labor camp was. I found myself alone
at the train station with my feet chained. I was terribly fright
ened that I would be accused o f deserting. I had never been
afraid o f freedom as much as at that moment. I hastily exited
the station and walked right down the middle o f the street
that crossed the city. I wanted everyone to see me, carrying my
chains as visibly as possible, so I wouldn’t be discovered hiding
42-
among the people and accused o f attempting to escape. The

people were astonished and crossed themselves, but I went on
my way. Since that episode, I remember Vaslui as the longest
city in the country, with a single, endless street, at the end o f
which I arrived after a forced, continuous march. When the
prisoners saw me, they leaped with joy that they had gotten me
back. They bore me on their arms, while the blacksmith cut the
rivets o f my chains, so I could go to work!”
He was then sent to Aiud Prison— “the dreadful prison”
that would open its starving mouth to devour thousands o f
young men, including Anghel, whose only fault was their vi
sion and a great love for their nation.
Here the prisoners split themselves into three groups. “ The
first group included those who sought a political solution by
any means, striving to know everything that was happening in
the country. The second group, smaller, were the indifferent,
those willing to compromise so that they could get out o f pris
on. The third and smallest group was that of the ‘mystics,’ those
who accepted being in that place, understanding that they were
there for their sins and for the sins o f the nation they loved and
that they had the duty to repent, pray, and live the Gospel com
mandments as much as they could. Valeriu Gafencu,1·* Anghel
Papacioc, Marin Naidim,14 15 Priest Vasile Serghie from Barlad
(their spiritual father), Virgil Maxim,16 Constantin Dumitrescu
14 Valeriu Gafencu ( 19 11- 19 5 1) was arrested in 1941. During his incar

ceration he was known as the “ Saint of the Prisons.” He sacrificed his own life
by giving his fellow prisoner Pastor Richard Wurmbrand his streptomycin to
treat his tuberculosis. He reposed in Targu Ocna Prison. See his Life in The
O rthodox Word, nos. 1 1 4 - 1 1 5 ( 10 0 1) , pp. 109-55.— E d .
15 Marin Naidim ( 19 11-19 9 9 ) spent twenty years in prison. He was fa
mous for the peace and tranquility he maintained in prison.— E d .
16 Virgil Maxim (19 15 -19 9 7) was arrested at the age o f nineteen in 19 4 1
for membership in the Brotherhood o f the Cross (the Legionnaire youth or
ganization). He served twenty-two years in prison, where he was regarded as
a saint by the other prisoners. Fr. Arsenie confirms this: “ Maxim had a perfect
45
(the future Fr. Marcu o f Sihăstria),17 and others were part of

this group.” 18 They “gave an example o f Christian conduct to
all the political prisoners, a model useful not only during the
dictatorial regime o f Antonescu but throughout their lives.” 19
Anghel was very active, drawing up a map tor the “mystics”
intuitive understanding o f the state o f things. In fact many did, but he pre
sented it in detail, in all o f its meaning. A very competent individual once said
about him that he was the only one o f us who was capable enough to be the
spiritual patriarch o f the country. I, who have known him since childhood,
agree.” Virgil M axims memoir, Imn pentru crucea purtata [Hymn for the cross
that was borne], is one o f the most valuable sources o f information about this
period in the Romanian prisons.— E d .
Fr. M arcu Costică Dumitrescu (19 10-19 9 9 ) was a confessor who
spent many years in prison. He was a monk at Cernica, Slatina, and finally
Sihăstria M onastery.— E d .
18 B ă l a n , M ărturia unui creştin, p. 38.
19 Virgil M axim , Im n Pentru Crucea Purtată [Hymn for the cross that
was borne] (Bucharest: Antim Press, 10 0 2), p. 180.
44
activity. Together with Traian Trifan and Marian Traian, he in

sisted that they shift their focus to “the vertical line, toward
spiritual perfection in opposition to the horizontal one repre
sented by political activity.”20 He considered that the Legion
naire Movement should no longer eclipse Christian teaching.21
He would argue, saying, “Oftentimes the political realm re
quires an intervention to which the Church’s authority and the
virtuous person cannot subscribe.”2223This, indeed, is the view
o f the Orthodox Church. He saw, however, that collaboration
could be possible between the Church, through her spiritually
enriched people, and the proper political groups led by faithful
Christians.
This new course, as outlined by the “mystics,”25 had ample
opponents. But it was these opponents, with their “encourage
ment of [political] activity, who were leading the Legionnaires
to suffering and annihilation. No one troubled or touched
those who were with me, because we were actually always pre
occupied with spiritual matters, and this was o f no interest to
the prisons administration.”24 Anghel and his associates were
accomplishing something “more profitable, yet without great
risks.”25 It was a very subtle strategy with great effect. Soon the
Communist regime would be established in Romania, sweep
ing away all other political parties, movements, and activities.
The only possibility to affect change in such a society would be
for each individual to pay heed to his own spiritual state.
The life o f Anghel and his companions was centered on
20 a c n s a s , Informant file 185003, vol. 3, p. 174.

21 Hierom onk Justin and M onk Kirion, “ C e atâta fricà de moartc?,” p.
l6 .
22 a c n sa s , Informant file 185003, vol. 3, p. 51.
23 The Securitate considered Anghel to be this groups religious theoreti
cian. See acnsas , Informant file 185003, vol. 1, p. 407.
24 a c n s a s , Informant file 1S5003, vol. 3, p. 50.
25 Ibid., p. 51.
45
prayer. They would pray, keep all-night vigils, and have a pro
gram o f study, meditation, and exegesis. But more importantly,
they would pray for their persecutors, saying this prayer: “ Lord,
Jesus Christ, Thou Who didst suffer for all mankind and dost
forgive the sins o f all those who repent, do not allow any o f
those who hate and persecute us to suffer any wrong on behalf
o f us at Thy Judgment. But guide their souls to the knowledge
o f the Truth and give them true repentance, that Thy Most
Holy Name may be glorified through them also. And vouch
safe us to confess Thee, the true God, Father, Son, and Holy
Spirit, to the glory o f Thy Name and the salvation o f our souls.
Amen!”26
Their group o f “mystics” was a true monastic community,
and the young Anghcl was a light among them— as they them
selves would affirm: “Anghel was a man o f exceptional zeal in
acquiring the stages o f a virtuous, pure, and holy life, and a
fervent reviver o f hesychastic prayer.”27 His prayer was a deep
inner prayer. “When Anghel Papacioc prayed, he did not hear
or see anything around him. He was completely absorbed in
prayer. He was a monk in laymans garb.”211
This third imprisonment truly became a spiritual academy
for Anghel: “No other means o f preparation could offer such
possibilities for growing in one’s faith, for spiritual deepening,
for a living relationship with God as were offered by the trib
ulations o f imprisonment. I bless that period o f time. I spent
years in the wilderness without encountering the possibility o f
deepening my thoughts about eternity, about the divine na
ture; this possibility was accorded me by way o f the torturous
boredom [of life in prison]. Suffering also united us. Those o f
us who succeeded in knowing each other on the cross, so to
speak, remained united.
26 Ibid., p. 91.
27 Ibid., p. no.
28 Ibid., p. 107.
46
“ The image I have o f my imprisonment is very much

bound up with that o f the little group, in which I felt great
well-being. There was a great camaraderie among us. Everyone
was prepared for death.... Was one really better than the other?
What matters is the way in which each one accepted suffering.
I would like to canonize all o f them, because thev were sincere
and didn’t hesitate to sacrifice themselves. All o f them sacri
ficed. They all died, one by one. With a joy that is difficult to
explain, I commemorate them all at the Proskomedia29 as spiri
tual fighters.”50
Throughout his imprisonment Anghcl willingly bore his
cross, suffering together with his spiritual brothers, supporting
and being supported, counseling and being counseled. “ I great
ly benefited from sufferings— this is the Cross—but you have
to carry it with God’s help because you cannot do anything on
your own.” He knew that his suffering, as that of those with
him, would be a sacrifice to God for the redemption of the
entire nation.
In the spring of 1943 a severe regimen was introduced into
the prison. The prisoners were given lower quality food and
placed in solitary confinement, in cells with blacked-out win
dows, under rigorous supervision. They would be taken out for
fresh air separately and isolated in “disciplining” rooms or in
Zarea,2931 where all those who would not collaborate with the
30
prison’s administration were sent. The administration tried to
“reform” them— to break them morally and make them aban
don their battle for the preservation of their exalted ideals, for
which they were now suffering. At Zarea “you were obliged
29 Proskom edia: prayers and preparation o f the Lamb (the bread for the
Eucharist) taken from the prosphoron (a round, leavened loaf with a seal on it)
before the Divine Liturgy.— E d .
30 M onk Moses, Sfân tu l închisorilor, p. 46.
31 Z area (“cage" in Hungarian) was a “prison inside the prison" at the
Aiud penitentiary. The Gherla prison also had its own “ Zarea.”— E d .
47
co stand or to sit on the edge o f your bed from five o’clock

in the morning until ten o’clock at night, even if you were ill.
Any medical assistance was prohibited. The soup was strained
through a sieve. Not even a bean, a grain, or a piece o f potato
was allowed. The window was blacked-out. There was even a
ration on firewood: three wood shavings. In the winter the liq
uid in the latrine had a layer o f ice on top.”32 Anghel spent time
at Zarca on numerous occasions, remaining steadfast, although
the conditions affected his health, causing him digestive ail
ments that he suffered for decades.
After August 13,19 4 4 , when Russian troops entered Roma
nia, the prison went through a period o f chaos and uncertain
ty. The inmates were moved to a prison in Alba Iulia for two
months and then brought back to Aiud. Now the prison had a
new, more lenient administration o f “transition.” The prisoners
had certain rights, like choosing their cellmates according to
their own preference, reading Holy Scripture, confessing once
a week, doing interior and exterior maintenance jobs, garden
ing, etc. The imprisoned priests were allowed to serve and be
spiritual fathers. There was even a chapel in the prison, where
services were held. Fr. Arsenie recounted: “ In prison we had
services on feast days, and I heard my mother being commemo
rated with the departed, when I believed she was alive. Every
one noticed this. Then I received a postcard with the follow
ing message: ‘Be strong, mother reposed.’ Then I began to pray
for her. I don’t know how much my spiritual heritage helped
me— but suffering helped me the most. I noticed that my suf
fering was also helping my family members, according to G od’s
wisdom.”
During this time the people in the villages neighboring the
prison were unable to harvest their crops since the men were at
32 loan Ianolidc, huoarcerea la H ristos— document pentru 0 hone noud

[Return to Christ— document for a new world] (Bucharest: Christiana Press,
1006), p. 47.
48
the front. They asked the prison’s administration for help. The
administration sent ordinary prisoners to help out, but many
o f them escaped because o f insufficient surveillance. The peo
ple in the village were desperate. Then the administration sent
the skilled and healthy political prisoners to work in the fields,
knowing they were honest. Being weak and afflicted, Anghel
had to stay in prison, where his younger cellmate and disciple,
Virgil Maxim, would give him food from the crops. Virgil re
corded events from this period:
“ I was in the same cell with Anghel Papacioc, now Archi
mandrite Arsenie from Techirghiol. Since he needed constant
care, I remained to look after him. I would boil him one or
two potatoes from our stock every day, as he could not eat
more. We spent our time praying and having spiritual conver
sations.... His constitution, as that o f other Legionnaires, was
physically marked by deprivations and sufferings, but his soul
became more illumined. I learned from him not only how to
truly pray, but especially how to penetrate into the depths o f
my soul with the sword o f the Word o f Divine Truth (cf. Heb.
4:12.) and repent.... We had many theological books that were
our nourishment and guidance on our path....
“ When Anghel Papacioc was praying— forgive me for dis
closing this— he did not hear or see anything around him. Fr.
Vasile Serghie had the same ability. They were completely ab
sorbed in prayer. During the ‘transition’ period (1945-1947),
in which we were allowed to organize our own life in prison,
I stayed in the same cell with Fr. Vasile Serghie and Anghel
Papacioc for a few months. Their spiritual rule also includ
ed— besides prayer, study, meditation, exegesis, etc.— a day o f
complete silence every week, with the goal o f attaining a mysti
cal depth, an encounter with God, and a scrupulous analysis
o f every moment and deed o f one’s life. This was followed by
confession, in which we further analyzed them [every moment
and deed] and, diving deeper, we tried to find cures and ways
49
Virgil Maxim at the time o f his arrest.
o f correcting ourselves or o f concord, based on each case. After

one such profound self-examination and reflection, Fr. Vasile
Serghie, who was not lenient with himself in any way, had a
moment o f great inner trembling:
“ ‘Brethren, I ’m troubled thinking about how I dared to
become a priest. Maybe God has brought me here to help me
truly become aware o f my unworthiness. What a mystery this
is, and what obligations weigh on the conscience o f such a ser
vant, and what a responsibility he has before the people and
God! I tremble and I don’t think I’ll be able to fulfill this mis
sion anymore, being aware that the priesthood is beyond my
abilities! And, rather than do it unworthily, it would be better
not to do it anymore!’
“I sat there in astonishment, looking down, amazed by
Father’s confession. Anghel Papacioc, drawing near him with
his eyes full o f tears, said, ‘Oh, Fr. Vasile, you’re truly a good
priest, now that you live with the awareness o f your unworthi
ness! For the power o f God is revealed in weakness and God
50
gives grace to the humble’ (cf. Prov. 3:54: II Cor. 12:9; James
4:6).
‘“ What a blessing it would be,’ Anghel continued, ‘i f ev
ery priest lived with this awareness. With how much attention,
fear, and trembling would he fulfill his service as an apostle o f
Christ on earth!’
“ Falling into each other’s arms, they cried— tears o f conso
lation and encouraging joy uniting on their cheeks. I knelt in
prayer. I was thinking that if a priest is trembling at the thought
o f his responsibility for this sacred office, then it’s easier for a
layman to be saved than for a priest.
“Anghel Papacioc was reading my thoughts: ‘You see, Br.
Virgil, salvation is from God. It’s made possible by God, not
for one who merely desires to be saved, but for one who begins
to do good deeds. The first step o f this work is precisely the
awareness o f one’s unworthiness. Then grace comes to make
you worthy, giving you the strength to move forward in your
place o f duty.’ Anghel Papacioc was, even at that time, like a
hidden monk and priest!
“ During that period o f time our movement inside the pris
on was unrestricted. We could go from one floor to another,
from one cell to another, going in and out o f the cellblock
or the section without being questioned as to where we were
going or who had given us permission. Galea was the only
guard for our cellblock, and there was one guard for each sec
tion. In the guardroom at the gate there was only one guard.
Galea slept in the prison for a week at a time, dozing o ff day
and night, because there was no one to take his place. We had
only one obligation— to be in our cells in the evening, at clos
ing. In order to accomplish a rule o f study, meditation, and
prayer, we had fashioned interior bolts. W hen you found a
door locked, you knew that a vigil lamp o f the heart was burn
ing for Christ there. You would return on the day and at the
hour indicated on the door. A Macedonian, Ciolacu, called
Si
in their dialect Ciolacului (he was later one o f the leaders o f

the [anti-Communist] resistance movement in the Babadag
Woods),33 was the head o f the crop-harvesting team. To main
tain order in the morning, the teams were called downstairs by
Galea, and went to the field one after the other. Ciolacu had
an enamel pot that he would take to the field so that the fruit
he would bring back for the sick (especially grapes) would not
get crushed in a bag— or he would leave it for those who re
mained in the prison to boil potatoes, beans, or m ăm ăligă-34
One evening he brought us some grapes and autumn peaches,
and we asked him to leave us the pot overnight so we could
boil some potatoes for Anghcl. We were not able to get up
on time in the morning because the ‘midnight’ prayers and
discussions lasted past midnight. The five-o’clock bell caught
us in morning prayers, at the Six Psalms o f Matins. When the
guard unlocked the doors, I remembered the pot. Ciolacu’s
team would be called and he wouldn’t have the pot handy. 1
wanted to get up, but I remained on my knees, thinking that
by the time the guard called Ciolacu we would have finished
the prayer. With his eyes closed, Anghel was softly reciting the
second-to-the-last psalm.
“ ‘Ciolacu’s team must come down to work!’ Galea shouted.
“ We heard hasty steps in front o f the cell and knocks on
the door, then Galea’s voice calling Ciolacu’s team. The other
team members’ quick steps echoed in the hallway. Someone
pushed the door slightly, but it didn’t open.
“ ‘Ciolacu must come and take command o f his team,’
Galea’s hoarse voice was heard. I wanted to rise. Tire interior
bolt, made out o f a wooden spoon, gave way, and Ciolacu ap
peared in the door, with his face a bit red. Seeing us at prayer,
33 The Babadag Woods are in the Babadag Mountains, in Dobtogea, a

region in the southeast o f Romania.— E d .
34 M ăm ăligă: Romanian polenta, used as a bread substitute, especially
by the poor.— E d .
and respecting Anghel Papacioc, he knelt next to me, pro

nouncing the psalm Anghel was reciting. I felt how he was
burning with anguish for the prayer to end, ashamed o f the
agitation he provoked. Anghel was just finishing with “Amen,”
when Galea shouted with an imperative voice:
‘“ Ciolacu must come down to his team!!!’
“Ciolacu grabbed the pot, put it in the bag and, as if saved
from the hand o f a foe, left with lightning speed, repeating,
Am en! Amen!’ Anghel rose a bit puzzled. Seeing me moving
my lips, trying to restrain the uncontrollable impulse to smile,
he said, ‘Did something happen? It seems I heard a noise!’
‘“ We forgot to bring the pot back to Ciolacu and he came
to take it. Finding us at prayer, he knelt, and left only when
you finished.’
“ ‘Oh my! Let’s repent for our negligence and for troubling
his soul.’
“ We recited Psalm 50 and made fifty prostrations for our
selves and for him.”35
Anghel’s discernment, watchfulness, and desire to help and
raise those in need from the depths o f anxiety is also seen in an
other account o f Virgil Maxim. On every level o f the prison there
was a regular prisoner serving the meals for the political prisoners.
Anghel and his cellmates noticed the sadness o f a newly assigned
server on their level and his habit o f serving food with certain
liturgical movements. In their desire to help him, Anghel and Vir
gil decided to invite him to their cell. At first he was reserved, but
then he came. Anghel said, “ Forgive us for inviting you here, but
your countenance reveals that your place is not among the ordi
nary prisoners. We don’t want to restore any painful memories to
your soul. There are priests among us, to whom you could confess
if you find it necessary.” The man replied, with tears streaming
down his cheeks, “Oh, brothers, I am a priest also. A hieromonk.
35 Maxim, hnn pentru cruceapurtata, pp. 10 7 -8 ,115 - 16 .
53
God brought me here for my sins.” Seeinglittle crosses at the head

o f the bed, he sighed, “I do not know you, but I trust that if the
Cross o f Christ the Lord is your weapon in suffering and you
have seen the turmoil o f my soul, I must be standing before some
God-fearing men. Hear my confession, for I have not said this to
anyone until now.” Virgil Maxim later related, “Dumbfounded,
we awaited with fear the confession o f a hieromonk to take place
before us, unworthy laymen.”36
“He recounted to them how during Lent he was sent to buy
fruit and vegetables from the city nearest to the monastery. He
purchased produce from the display, and some was brought to
him from storage, already packed in sacks. After everything was
weighed, he paid and left. When he arrived at the monastery and
opened the sacks he found seeds, peels, and rotten potatoes with
only a layer o f good fruit on top. The abbot sent him back and
told him to say to the merchant that he might have made a mis
take and to ask him to give him good merchandise. Even though
he was angry for having made a fool out o f himself, the hicro-
monk went and told the merchant what the abbot advised him.
To his utter surprise, the merchant denied everything and accused
him o f lying. Being angry and not thinking right, the hieromonk
slapped him. The merchant fell and hit his head against a piece of
metal in the doorway. He died on the spot. All the people pres
ent set upon him, tore his cassock, and took him to the police
station, beating him on the way. He was quickly put on trial and
sentenced to forced labor for life.
“The hieromonk continued: ‘Now I am serving my sen
tence, as is fitting. I should have endured the loss and the injus
tice, the mocking and the fraud, rather than get angry. Breth
ren, how many people in this world die from a slap on the face ?
But God showed me that I should not raise my hand against
the one who did me injustice.’ We listened to his confession
36 Maxim, Im n pentru crucea purtată, p. I2.L.
54
and reproof with tears in our eyes. Anghel said, ‘Father, you
have a prayer rule. How are you able to do it in the unfavor
able environment in which you live?’ The hieromonk replied,
‘This is my tragedy: during the day I cannot do much. Only at
night, when everyone is asleep, I get up, make prostrations and
weep for my sin.’ Anghel told him, 'Father, if you trust us, we
beg you to come to our cell during the day and do your rule.
We will join you in prayer.’”37
For the following three weeks the three o f them prayed to
gether. One day the hieromonk did not show up for prayer. In
the evening he came joyfully to give them the good news: he
was about to be released based on an amnesty for those whose
crimes were unintentional. God had seen his true repentance.
The hieromonk blessed his two benefactors, embraced them,
and left.
Anghel next lived in the same cell as Traian Trifan— a
friend o f his in the world— now his co-sufferer. H alf o f a cen
tury later, Fr. Arsenic would recount: “I thank God with all
my heart for getting to know this hero, wise in all things, who
desired to remain unknown and who humbly meditated on all
the years God suffers us without giving us over to death or to
the demons to lead us astray.... In a moment o f great closeness
I told him with discretion and fear: I want to go to the mon
astery! With a fiery gaze he looked me straight in the eye and
wept. It was like a blessing from this great man.”38
During this more relaxed period o f detention the prisoners
were allowed to work in the prison workshops. Anghel chose
to devote his time to woodcarving. He was assigned to carve
a portrait frame, which was declared the most beautiful work
in the entire art museum o f the prison— a collection that had
numerous extraordinary pieces made by prisoners. He also
worked with a team carving a two-foot-tall shrine representing
37 Ibid., pp. 111-13.
38 Seiche, M a rtin , p. 481.
55
Model o f the Curtea de Argeş Church, built by inmates at Aiud, in 194s.
the monastery church at Curtea de Argeş. One o f the inmates

obtained permission from the prison board to organize a work
shop for toys and one for willow basketwork. The shrine was
built under the cover o f these activities. Some o f the inmates did
the carpentry work, while Anghel and his three helpers carved
the exterior. The shrine was made piece by piece. During the
56
Vigil lamp and support carved by Fr. Arsenic in Aiud and

preserved in his cell at Techirghiol Monastery.
construction, many prisoners learned woodcarving from Ang-

hel, making walnut vigil lamps with bone ornaments. It was at
this time that he carved the vigil lamp he would keep in his
cell at Techirghiol Monastery many years later. In the succeed
ing years he was able to continue this kind o f work, carving
the Roval Doors for the chapel in Braşov, the entrance doors
for a bank in Turda, and after his release, the Royal Doors for
the Cozia Monastery church and other churches in Bucharest.
When the famous Romanian sculptor Ion Jalea (1887-1983)
saw a photograph o f the shrine built in Aiud, he exclaimed,
“If Anghel had not been imprisoned, he would have surpassed
us all!”
57
CH APTER TH REE
E N T E R I N G UPON T H E PATH
n S e p t e m b e r 8, 1946, upon the completion o f his sen

tence, Anghel returned to his parental home at Mislea-
nu, where his brother Ion was living, after his mother’s repose.
He was now preparing for another freedom: liberation from
the cares o f this world—to attain the pinnacle o f Scripture:
“Dost thou desire to be perfect? Deny thyself, take up thy
cross, and follow Me” (cf. Matt. 19:2.1; Mark 8:54, 1 0 :1 1) !
loan Ianolide, who knew Anghel while at Aiud Prison,
wrote a description o f him from this period o f his life: “ Short,
lean, agile, and lively; a man who never compromised.... Mo-
nasticism was his calling. Virginal in soul and body, upright in
character. Unending energy and an immense capacity for love.
A warrior and a man o f sacrifice. A missionary conscience and
talent. He converted people before and after taking monastic
vows. He struggled to confirm in people a true Christian con
science, and he achieved it. He is a light o f Christ.” 1
The desire to dedicate his life to God and enter the monas
tic life had formed in Anghel’s mind quite early, as seen from
his vow to become a monk when he was only thirteen. Upon
completing his time in the camp at Miercurea Ciuc, his desire
for monasticism grew stronger, even though he was very suc
cessful in the world: he had a good salary, his own car, and he
had even become a mayor. As he used to say, “ You have to go
to the monastery as a victor, not as one defeated.” The time
1 Ianolide, Intoarcerea la Hristos, p. 318.
58
ENTERING UPON THE PATH
spent at Aiud Prison reconfirmed and reinforced the decision

that had always shone from the depths o f his being. It was o f
his time in Aiud that he would later declare, “As a layman I ex
perienced the most merciless renunciation o f life, with spiritual
exercises that illumined my inner life, to the point o f the last
renunciation, offering to the Lord— out o f a great need— all
the feelings of my heart.”2
Now, after his second incarceration, it was time. At the age
of thirty-three, the age o f a perfect man (Eph. 4:1}), he resolved
to leave the world, pick up his cross, and follow Christ. Here
Fr. Arsenie recalls those first steps on the path he would tread
for the next sixtv-four years:
“ I went to the monastery out o f foolishness-for-Christ. I
became a monk out o f great zeal, because you cannot succeed
if you don’t possess foolishness-for-Christ. Here you strip your
self [of the old man] so you can find yourself [the new man] in
the angelic order.”3
“ When I decided to go to the monastery, about fifty years
ago, many people wanted to stop me. Even an important of
ficial— the Secretary o f Religions at the time— told me that
all kinds o f falls and defilements happen there [in monaster
ies]. But I answered him that I was going to the monastery
for Christ, and that I was not interested in what was going on
there, but in Christs teaching: H e that loveth fa th er or mother
more than M e is not worthy o f M e : an d h e that loveth son or
d aughter more than M e is not worthy of M e. A nd he that taketh
not his cross, an d followeth after M e, is not worthy o f M e (Matt.
10:37-58).
“ I met them decades later. And they asked me, ‘What did
you see there?’
2 Pctcu, Părintele Arsenie Papacioc in documentele Securităţii, p. 256.

3 Fr. Arsenie Papacioc, “ Părintele Marcu— un om de jertfa" [Father M ăr
cii— a man o f sacrifice], Scara, no. 7, 2001, pp. 136-37.
59
“ ‘I found what you told me, but I didn’t believe I would

find saints as well! I also found saints!...’”
His mother, Stanca, knew o f his intention before her re
pose. “I had a very good mother, but she did not agree with
me when she heard I wanted to go to the monastery. The poor
woman, she didn’t know! I greatly rejoice I became a monk.
I didn’t err, even though I saddened my mother. I told her:
‘Mother, everyone should come here!’”4 Stanca thought— just
as Anthuza, the mother o f St. John Chrysostom, had once
thought— that she would be widowed a second time by losing
Anghel. Now his mother had gone ahead into the other world,
but other obstacles arose.
“I had a difficult family situation when I was about to go
to the monastery. Two o f my brothers had died; their children
were little, each with their own needs. I was the only close rela
tive, and I felt responsible for their upbringing and education.
But I desired to go to the monastery, to become a monk. I
thought: Even in fifteen years they’ll still be little, but many
things can happen in fifteen years. And I didn’t give in!”
Anghel’s relatives from the village were also opposed to his
decision. One o f his aunts said to him, “ What is that— a mon
astery?! You were a Legionnaire!” Anghel replied, “And what
if I were a Legionnaire? I liked them because they were pious
people...” Later on he would say, “I was a Legionnaire, but now
I’m a monk above everything.”5 Here is how he explained this
to a colleague: “We, who have gone through such great trials
[the sufferings during his time as a Legionnaire] should not
stop here; we need to move forward, to reach the peak from
which we can gaze much further, at the other world, where sac
rifice means living in the spirit o f God. Here you find a new
4 Fr. Arsenic Papacioc, “ D e ce n-ai iubit?” [W hy didn’t you love?], A ti-

tudini, no. to, March, гою , p. 30.
5 a c n s a s , Informant file 185003, vol. 3, pp. 14 8 -7 3.
60
1
shore o f tranquility and peace: the wounds are miraculously

healed, and the rewards are inscrutably eternal.”
The emotional moment o f saying farewell to his village
and family finally arrived. “ When I went to the monastery
I didn’t go through the village, because people knew me. I
passed through the outskirts, as we lived at the entrance o f
the village. My younger nephew was with my relatives. When
I looked back I saw all o f them crying, rubbing their eyes, and
the young one was crying too. This was a great sacrifice— if you
were to marry on the other side o f the world they wouldn’t cry
after you so much. And I saw in this a total separation from
my family.”
From Misleanu he went to Bucharest, where his brother
Ion was hospitalized, suffering from tuberculosis. “I went to
look for a priest to confess him. I knew the importance o f
Confession: I had read the Patericon— I had held it in my
possession for about six years. I don’t know how I got to
61
Antim Monastery [in Bucharest]. I hadn’t seen monks or

nuns until then. There I saw a priest. I approached him and
talked to him about my hospitalized brother and about my
desire to become a monk. The priest diligently took note o f
my brother’s name, the hospital, and the room number and
went to see him— confessing and communing him. My broth
er had written his sins in a list o f four pages and had a thor
ough Confession. Later on I found out that this priest was
the great professor Fr. Benedict (Ghiuş).6 Since then I have
had great reverence for him, commemorating him my en
tire life. I went again to visit my brother in the hospital, and
upon my departure I looked back and said to myself: I don’t
think I’ll see him alive again. And that’s how it happened: he
died shortly thereafter. It was right then that I went to the
monastery to become a monk.”
On January 13, 1947, Anghel set o ff toward “heaven.” “I
went to the patriarchate to venerate the relics o f St. Demetrios
[Basarabov]. These were the first relics I had venerated, and I
was very moved.... I had such an inner trembling that when I
left the church and saw the clear sky I could have leapt into it;
I had that foolishness-for-Christ. And I did not err!
“There was a religious bookstore near the patriarchate,
and someone had asked me to give a book to the seller. They
knew each other, but I didn’t know the seller. There were two
women in front o f the store. I gave the book to the seller, then
turned to go. I didn’t get more than thirty or forty yards away
6 Hieromonk Benedict (Ghiuş) (19 0 4 -19 9 0 ) was tonsured into monas-
ticism in 1934 at Neamţ Monastery. He served as a professor at Bălţi Seminary
and later as a priesdy celebrant at the patriarchal cathedral. In the 1950s he
took part in the Burning Bush movement at Antim Monastery— a gathering
o f spiritual fathers and intellectuals focused on the revival o f the hesychast tra
dition. This led to his arrest in 1958, and his sufferings at the Jilava, Aiud, and
Ostrov prisons. H e was released in the general amnesty o f 1964 and retired in
silence to Cernica Monastery. Numerous individuals witnessed the Uncreated
Light o f C hrist shining from his frail body.— E d .
61
Iconographie portrait o f
Fr. Benedict Ghiu;.
when one o f the women came after me, “Sir, the seller is call
ing you!” I returned to him and he gave me a book saying,
“ Keep your promise!” This is all he told me. Can you imagine?
I didn’t know him, he didn’t know me, and he didn’t know my
thoughts, my hidden vows. This was yet another sign that I had
to move forward.”
As Anghel was walking down the street, a photo got stuck
to his shoe. He picked it up and saw a photo o f the Shroud o f
Turin. He considered this another encouragement on the path
he was taking. He kept this photo his entire life in the Book o f
N eed s7 he always carried with him.
He also crossed paths with his army captain, who had since
7 Book o f Needs: a liturgical book, containing various services that a

priest may be called upon to perform.— E d .
become a major. He was delighted to have run into Anghel and

said enthusiastically, “I’ll be promoted; stay in the army and
I ’ll give you a good position—I need people like you.” Anghel
stopped him, “Say no more. I’m now going to become a m onk!”
The major respected his decision and they parted. Thus Anghel
set o ff on his new path, a path filled with trials and temptations.
“My novitiate was very harsh. I intended to go to Frasinei
Monastery, which had a metochions in Râmnicu Vâlcea, where
I would meet the abbot o f the monastery. I had never seen a
monastery in my life, but I had heard o f Frasinei.
“God was not absent [in those moments o f my life], but I
had to be inspired in order to be aware o f His presence. I was
on the train, in a fourth-class car, in which they also transport
ed animals. There, a youth group was singing religious songs. I
was really happy, and I said to myself; ‘Behold, the angels, how
they’re singing to me!’ There, on the train, I met a peddler who
knew all the monasteries. He— a stranger—was a guardian an
gel for me. He accompanied me to the metochion o f Frasinei
Monastery. Elder Simeon, the abbot o f Frasinei Monastery,
told me: ‘I’m not going to accept you. Brother. I see that you’re
a little better educated, and I can’t have you tending oxen. And
then what would the brethren say? “ You’re keeping this one in
the office, while you’re putting us to hard work!”’ The abbot
was wrong in his evaluation, but I could not prove my foolish-
ness-for-Christ. At that time, to enter a monastery, after having
succeeded in the world, and to be taken as a servant, as a slave,
would mean that you had reached a level o f great devotion, o f
foolishness— knowing how to exist without the ‘ego’ in your
self. Otherwise you could not survive.
“ From that metochion I went to Cozia Monastery.8 9 It was
8 M etochion: a dependency o f a monastery, usually located in a city.—

E d.
5 C ozia Monastery was founded in about 1388 by K ingM ircca the Elder
(1355-1418), one o f the greatest kings in Romanian history.— E d .
64
1
Painting o f Cozia Monastery.
winter, and they had Vespers in the refectory. I went first into
the church to venerate the icons, intending to go to the icon of
the Savior, but I stopped in front o f the icon o f the Mother o f
God and said, ‘The Mother o f God will direct me to the Savior
also!’ They asked me to read the kathismu10 at Vespers, and I
began reading. Meanwhile, a certain father, Ghervasie, called
to me: ‘Listen, Br. Anghel! Where did you learn to read?’ —
as he wasn’t able to read. T was born like this, Father. I don’t
know when I learned.’”
Anghel was greatly impressed with Fr. Ghervasie’s simplic
ity and viewed him as a model monk. Many years later, Fr. Ar-
senie would use him as an example o f one who truly lived his
faith, not one who simply theorized:
“Long after, I spoke with a gentleman who wanted to es
tablish some monasteries according to his taste, not accord
ing to the Orthodox Tradition—which very few understand. I
10 Katbism a (pi. kathism ata): one o f the twenty sections into which the
Psalter is divided for use in Church services.— E d .
65
A
E TE R N ITY IN THE M OMENT
related to him my encounter with Fr. Ghervasie: ‘Sir, look who

kept the monastic spirit: an illiterate man, who truly lived the
Faith in his heart, and all o f monasticism lived through him !’
I still commemorate Ghervasie as a great example given to me,
as o f a great scholar. My interest lies in attaining a permanent
relationship with God.
“After I entered monasticism I felt very small and insignifi
cant, but I was strongly encouraged by the magnitude o f the
mystery o f this commitment. I felt the immense value o f the
fire o f being reborn as a humble new being, an experience that
cannot be known in the world, because there [in the world] the
golden cross o f denying ones own will does not exist. Here [in
monasticism] man’s many weaknesses are unveiled. Thus, you
feel the need to humble yourself—the most important ingredi
ent in the formation o f the spiritual personhood o f the new
man, the monk— and by the grace o f God the mind is sharp
ened, the heart is humbled, and you don’t know how you came
to possess knowledge that was hidden from you until now. Here
you come to know that the humble man never sees himself as
humble; that everyone has his own measure o f humility, which
is an extraordinary weapon against evil spirits; and that this is
the result o f the gifts gladly bestowed by the Divine Master’s
hand.
“One endlessly discovers possibilities for a chaste life, for a
way o f being spiritually aware, and for experience. As Blessed
Augustine says: ‘God wants to bestow upon you more gifts
than you ask for!’ This leads you to great hope, as Solomon
says: ‘H e who puts his trust in the Lord will not be put to
shame’ (cf. Prov. 19:2.5). But I ’m most thankful for G o d ’s
boundless goodness, for He has given us the Mother o f G od as
an intercessor, the immaculate defender o f sinners. To change
our lives, we only need a strong will and great trust in the
mercy o f the Mother o f God and in her almighty help. At the
monastery my soul was set on fire with joy, as I commended
66
ENTERING UPON TH E PATH
myself in prayers to the Mother o f God, the bountiful defense

o f us who are weak.
“ There, at the monastery, I learned more than anything to
forgive, to pray to God day and night, and to love people with
no partiality.
“ They made me sacristan from my first days there. There
was a perpetual vigil lamp dedicated to the Mother o f God. At
the time there was a great shortage o f oil. I would always pray
that the vigil lamp wouldn’t go out. In the morning. I ’d open
the door o f the church, wanting to see if it was still lit ... and
when I ’d see that it was, I ’d crawl on my knees all the way from
the entryway to the vigil lamp, out o f joy that it hadn’t died
out.... They weren’t giving me oil but the vigil lamp was burn
ing day and night.... It was the work o f the Mother o f God.”
All his life he was zealous in keeping the vigil lamp lit in the
church or in his cell. Just as the vigil lamp was burning in his
cell, so was his heart burning with the love o f Christ.
“One night they made us carry sacks, and the next day they
gave me a ryassa. We had a hierarchical service and I was the
sacristan. But the robe was too long and I kept on tripping on
it during the service. While I was carrying the candlestick, a
small rug got caught on a nail in the sole o f my shoe and I be
gan to drag it after me. I was shaking my leg, but the rug was
not coming off. I said to myself: They’ll shoot me! The bishop
was there, and it was the first time I had seen a hierarch vested,
and I was afraid.”
Once he went with a monk to venerate the relics o f St.
Pachomius, a hermit who had lived in the area. On the way
they passed by Stani§oara Monastery. One o f the monks, Ag-
athangelos, whom Br. Anghel had never seen before, called to
him saying, “Br. Anghel, I know you’re going to St. Pachomius.
Stop by to see me on your way back, for I have something
to tell you.” After he venerated the relics, Br. Anghel visited
Stanifoara Monastery. Monk Agathangelos told him, “ They’ll
67
E TE R N ITY IN THE M OM ENT
want to make you a priest; you should obey them and accept
the priesthood. I was disobedient when they wanted to ordain
me a priest, and I ran away with one o f the brothers. We pre
pared our flight, took food and clothing, and one evening we
ran away. The night caught us in the forest and we slept there.
That night I had a dream that seemed like a vision. I saw a big
dark man; it was the enemy, who asked me, ‘Where arc you go
ing, Agathangelos? Know that I will arrive at your destination
before you.’ Then I was overcome with fear and I returned to
the monastery.”
Fr. Arsenie continued his reflection on becoming a monk:
“You come to the monastery with great yearning, as they
say— a foolishness-for-Christ, to crucify yourself for Him, to
suffer insults, blows, and persecution, to defeat the great ene
my, the ego; and you sincerely guard yourself and strive toward
the hopeful sea o f salvation—true humility. Thus you will ex
perience true freedom, a desire to truly love everyone. In other
words, you yearn to receive humiliation. His crown o f thorns,
the nails, the spear, and death for Him.... It’s a longing for the
Cross, and the Cross means to bear what you don’t like—with
joy, not forced— a yearning to crucify yourself for Christ, med
itating on Him being struck in the face and covered in blood.
How would you have felt if you had seen those scenes? Would
you have been indifferent? Would you have done something
for the Crucified One to ease His sufferings ? Behold, now you
can.... In this way [monasticism] you’ll ease vour terrible pas
sions, and someday and somewhere you’ll be a little savior. It
scares you when you hear that it’s a life-and-death struggle. You
don’t consider the fact that you’re actually living very well—
you have meals on time, you sleep at a certain time— but you
came to the monastery to live more spiritually than bodily, and
it seems to me that we somehow live more bodily than spiritu
ally, based on our likings. Everything is about doing what you
don’t like, for as much as you deny yourself in every way, God
68
ENTERING UPO N TH E PATH
approaches you in the same measure. Let no one be deceived

that it’s possible in any other way.
“So, the first enemy on the path o f your spiritual progress
is you— renounce your own self! You renounced the world,
you joined the monastery. But renounce yourself, Brother, give
up your pride and your pretensions. The goal o f coming to a
monastery is not to establish a simple or false administrative
link between my superior and me. This would serve no spiri
tual purpose; it would have a bunch o f material goals, and it
would not shape me or anyone, in the sense o f uplifting us bv
the grace o f God.
“ In coming to a monastery we’re humbling ourselves for
our relatives as well. Reflect on this matter when you have the
chance to humble yourself: that you’re also humbling yourself
for each of your relatives.
“As far as the relations between the brethren go, there is a
psychological desire in some people not to let the other grow—
they want the other person to remain at their own level. They
find excuses for themselves in the others transgressions. They
accept each other’s defects and become friends— a terrible mis
take. You have your own individuality; why do you keep com
pany with someone who provides you with reasons to justify
yourself? Proceed based on the grace you have. If you can, give
him something to help him improve.... Anyhow, if you can’t,
be at peace, for there is hope.”
Once, when he was asked in an interview, “ Why did you
become a monk?” he gave a surprising reply: “So that I could
wrestle with God and defeat H im !”
Years later he would elaborate on his answer, “ This state
ment is extremely bold.... The Old Testament speaks about Ja
cob, who wrestled with God and vanquished Him (cf. Gen. 31:
24-30 ). What does it mean?
“ Man is created in the image and likeness o f God. Man
is the only link between the Creator and creation. He was
69
entrusted with the great responsibility o f being accountable for

the destiny o f creation.
“ When I stated that I am wrestling with God, I did not use
a figure o f speech.... Those o f us who came to the monastery
have fulfilled the words o f Holy Scripture. St. Basil the Great
says: ‘What is the pinnacle o f Holy Scripture, so I can reach
it?’ And it’s mentioned by the Savior when He tells the rich
young man: ‘Dost thou will to be perfect? Leave everything
and come and follow M e!’ (cf. Matt. 19:11).
“You’ve left everything, you’ve renounced the world, but
now you have to deny yourself also! In the world, a man asserts
his will in order to solve the problems that arise.... In the mon
astery, we have to deny our free will, so Whom are we fight
ing? We’re wrestling with the Creator o f free will! It’s easy in
theory, but in practice?...
“I ’ve attempted this and seen that everything said about
man is possible, that he can become like God by grace. I find
myself a weak man, but I ’m on the path....
“To deny your own will means to abandon your worldly
personality and to find yourself in that which is angelic— this
is why we’re called the angelic order.
“My advice to my many spiritual children who come al
most daily to tell me they want to enter a monastery is this:
You’re not going to the monastery to find a monastery, but to
make one! Through your obedience, through your perseverance
in denying your own will, through your manner o f knowing
how to behave, you’re creating a monastery....
“The effort to keep your chastity and poverty is not that
great, even though it’s not easy, because this is not about your
own renunciation, it’s about the demonic attacks— that effort
comes through the attacks o f demons, who are zealous and
very ‘fervent’— a multitude o f demons trying to put you in a
position to break the monastic vows.
“Self-denial marks the pinnacle o f Holy Scripture, which
7°
ENTERING UPON TH E PATH
says: ‘Do you want to be perfect?’ (cf. Matt. 19 :11). Perfection

is granted precisely by this self-denial, which is an exceptional
thing.”
7i
C H A P T ER FOUR
E X IL E
C o m m u n i s t r e g i m e was now coming into power
T
he
in Romania, and since Anghel’s release from prison the

Securitate1 had kept him under surveillance. The young Br.
Anghel had to report to the police every trip he was intend
ing to make. Furthermore, they would check up on him at
Cozia almost every month to see if he had engaged in any p o
litical activities. The results o f these examinations were always
negative.
Br. Anghel and his abbot, Ghermano, were appointed to
teach at the school attached to Turnu Monastery. “At Turnu
Monastery I was appointed to be a teacher. And I announced
the topic for the whole year to the students: Jesus Christ. A t
the end o f the first term, the Communists from Râmnicu Vâl
cea came to change my topic. I was not to teach Christ, but
a r l u s ,12 that is, the devil. And I said, ‘What? It’s not possible!
All my life I ’ve fought against the devil, and now I have to col
laborate with him?’ I didn’t accept it. N o way. I resigned. My
abbot, Ghermano, was also a teacher, but for other classes. And
he agreed to collaborate with the Communists. I was a disci
plined boy; when I tell you about ‘my abbot,’ I speak o f a great
1 Securitate: the Romanian internal secret service under the Com m u

nists.— E d .
2 A R L U S : Asociaţia Română pentru Strângerea Legăturilor cu Uniunea
Sovietică (The Association o f Romanian-Soviet Collaboration). This was an
“educational” system during that period, which was meant to spread Soviet
propaganda among Romanians, behind the facade o f cultural exchange.— E d .
71
1
E TE R N ITY IN TH E M O M ENT
man, for he was my abbot. But I was faithful regarding my pur

pose in entering the monastery.·1
“I resigned from the school. They didn’t accept my resig
nation. I gave my second resignation. They didn’t accept that,
either. I gave my third resignation, not caring if they would ac
cept it or not, and I didn’t go again. No way. The abbot sim
ply tortured me. He moved me from my cell, which I shared
with the brethren, to a place under [King] Mircea’s veranda, at
Cozia Monastery, where the stone walls were moldy from the
wash o f the Olt River.
“I was happy, please believe me. But I was also determined:
‘If he throws me out, I ’ll go to another monastery, but I ’m not
leaving o f my own will!’”
The brethren were puzzled by the abbot’s behavior toward
Br. Anghel, and asked him why he was treating him in such a
manner. Anghel had come to the monastery already formed;
he was a good brother. Many times the fathers from Cozia, and
even abbots from the surrounding monasteries, would come to
ask his advice— “Br. Anghel, how do you see this matter?” —
and he would counsel them. Then, to get rid o f him, the abbot
sent him to Comanca, to keep an eye on a big estate.
“There was a 750-acre estate owned by six monasteries, C o
zia among them, and it was a mile away from Caracal, in the
commune o f Comanca.
“Every month they sent a brother from the monastery to
keep an eye on the property, along with brothers sent by the
other monasteries.4 Finally, to get rid o f me, the abbot, who in
the beginning had called me an angel, sent me there— as now
I was a devil— and I went with great delight. Anyway, some
things happened to me there! If I had not had such events in
1 T h a t is, h e e n te re d th e m o n a ste ry d e te rm in e d to liv e a life fu lly d e d i

c a te d to C h r is t .— T r a n s .
4 T h e o t h e r m o n a ste rie s w e re s e n d in g th e le ast a m o n g th e b re t h re n , o f
w h o m t h e y d id n o t h a v e g re a t n e e d .— T r a n s .
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my life ... things o f such beauty ... but with suffering! Nothing
can be accomplished without sacrifice!
“What did I do? I went to Caracal, about a mile away, and
bought a goat which had just given birth to a baby goat— a
kid. As I was walking with the goat on a leash, people sitting at
their gates started asking me to give them the kid. I said to my
self: ‘What am I going to do with this kid?’ I sold it. And after
I sold it, they took the kid into a big courtyard to slaughter it.
The goat was crying on one side, the kid was squealing as they
were slaying it, and I was in the middle. It broke my heart, and
I left, but the goat didn’t want to move, because its kid was left
behind. And so, what occurred to me? I took the kid’s skin and
gave it to my traveling companion, to walk ahead o f us with it,
and the goat followed also....
“My goat became so tame that she could no longer be
without me. I used to carry water from a well beyond the
estate, and she would follow me like a little child. And she
wouldn’t allow anyone but me to milk her. She damaged
many things: I had to run after her; she caused all sorts o f
trouble; she spied on me.... I had a small fir tree there, and,
because it was green, she was tempted to break it. And where
do you think she would climb? She’d climb onto a bridge
where there was a big warehouse. Carts loaded with provi
sions would arrive there, and the sacks were placed on the
bridge, and then deposited into the warehouse. There on the
bridge, I saw that she wasn’t able to defend herself. [When
I finally caught her] I didn’t hit her because she didn’t have
anywhere to go.... And after that, every time I chased her, she
ran to that bridge, because she knew that there I wouldn’t
beat her up. Ah, animals!
“ But let me tell you about an incident that was so great
that it broke my heart! 1 entered that big warehouse to pray.
The goat was outside, crying for me to bring her in also. I
couldn’t do that, because there was grain on the floor, and I ’d
75
have to keep an eye on her. Nevertheless, I brought her in,

taking her by one horn and by the car, and I pulled her next
to me, so that she would sit still.... I made her kneel on her
front knees, to immobilize her. And I did my prayers. When
I went the next day, she came and knelt on her own, as on
the previous day. Do you see what great joy Abbot Ghcrmano
gave me? I greatly benefited from that goat!”
Here, at Comanca, he also had a chicken. One day the
chicken went missing, and Br. Anghel decided to pray to St.
Menas,5 “St. Menas, give me my chicken!” He ended up finding
it. He later related, “Since then I have had a great reverence for
St. Menas.”
“Usually the brethren would stay at Comanca for a month.
The abbot forgot me there.” Br. Anghel was left there for six
teen months.
“Sixteen months later the cloth coat I was wearing was torn
in tatters, and I didn’t have another garment... I was persecut
ed, but I was happy; I was patient and I didn’t want to leave
the monastery. I said to myself; If he [the abbot] kicks me out,
I’m leaving, but if not, I’m not. I even told the abbot: If you
give me a blessing, I ’ll go; if not, I’m staying no matter what!”
During this period Fr. Gherasim (Iscu) ( t i 9 s 0 · the abbot
o f Tismana Monastery, met Br. Anghel, to whom the fathers
and the abbots o f the surrounding monasteries were coming
for counsel on different matters. Impressed with the spiritual
stature o f the young novice, he said to the abbot at Cozia,
“How can you keep such a man here?!” He wanted to take Br.
Anghel from Comanca and bring him to Tismana, but Br. A n
ghel told him that he could not go anywhere without his ab
bot’s blessing.
When Fr. Arsenie was around eighty years old, he said, “ If
I have a source o f joy at my age, after decades o f life in the
5 Great M artyr Menas (commemorated Nov. n ) is often invoked for
help in the finding o f lost items.— E d .
76
EXILE
Tismana Monastery.
monastery, it is that I never took a step without a blessing; I

went wherever I was sent.”6
That year the Communist regime wanted to take posses
sion not only o f the large estate at Comanca, but also o f the
rich wheat harvest. The local mayor decided to carry out this
scheme earlier than scheduled. When the wheat was already
loaded in freight cars, Br. Anghel went to the City Hall and
protested against this unjust act, telling the mayor, “Tonight
they’ll remove you from office, and you’ll come to ask my
forgiveness!” And that is how it happened. That evening the
Communists removed him from office because he had not fol
lowed their plan. The next day the mayor came to Br. Ang
hel and asked him, “Sir, who are you?!” He replied, “I ’m just
what you see, but I’m telling you that you should not take the
6 Archimandrite Teofil Paraian, A m in tiri despre duhovnicii pe care i-am

cunoscut [Remembering the spiritual fathers I knew] (Ciuj-Napoca: Teognost
Press, 10 0 3), p. 87.
77
E T E R N IT Y IN THE M O M E NT
monasteries’ wheat because that’s their sustenance!” The wheat

was not taken, although it had already been loaded in freight
cars. Years later Fr. Arsenie related, “Obviously, when I saw
what was going on, I went with my goat and fell on my knees,
praying.”
When Abbot Ghermano came to Comanca, the abbots
from the other monasteries told him how Br. Anghel had saved
the monasteries’ wheat, saying, “Look, Anghel did this!” The
abbot approached Br. Anghel and told him that, as a reward, “ I
give you a blessing to leave. But where will you go?”
“I replied, ‘You’re no longer my abbot, so I ’m not telling
you!’ I knew God’s great providence was guiding me, and so I
struggled to humble myself.... It was my first bold action, but
he had caused me much grief.” When Br. Anghel was about to
depart, the abbot told him, “ What can I do, Br. Anghel? I am a
man with many fears.” Anghel replied, “ Father, fear is a deadly
sin. We compromise, but only up to the truth, even if we have
to pay with our life.”
Years later, Abbot Ghermano visited Hicromonk Arsenie
at Cheia Monastery. Fr. Arsenie received him with much good
will. The abbot asked him, “Father, are you upset with me?”
“No, I ’m not upset with you,” responded Fr. Arsenie. Then the
abbot asked forgiveness and left. Two months later he died on
the streets o f Braşov.
On August 18, 1948, Br. Anghel moved from Cozia to Tis-
mana Monastery. “Fr. Gherasim (Iscu), the abbot o f Tismana
Monastery, took me from there. He was arrested later on, and
when he died in prison, he said, ‘Behold, I see Light! I see only
white! Only white!’ And thus he died....
“I stayed one night at Tismana, and then he sent me to
Cioclovina, a skete two and a half miles away, in the moun
tains. There were many wolves and bears. They had twenty bee
hives there, and I was guarding them from the bears. At night
I would take a tin pan and beat it, and the bears would run
78
EXILE
away.... I wouldn’t give in. I made a small garden there, above

which was a small creek: drip, drip, drip. My predecessor had
placed a small barrel there, and the water would accumulate
during the day. In the evening I would pull the plug and water
the garden, and all the water would be used. I had a vegetable
garden and nineteen grapevines....”
Here he lived for five months, keeping vigil every night
beginning at midnight. “I resolved to keep vigil at midnight.
Once I delayed in beginning the vigil, and I heard the bells
chiming. There was no one to ring them, for I was alone
there. I went to see who it was; the ropes were moving, but
no one was there. I went into the church, fell on the ground,
and prayed, thinking it was my guardian angel awakening me
at the time o f prayer, although never in my life was I a lazy
man.
“I almost died there, but I was saved by the wolves.... They
[the authorities] would’ve arrested and killed me! The Securi
tate sent someone there one night. I was in the church and I
saw some lights reflecting o ff the walls.... What could this be? I
didn’t know. Can you imagine?... Someone was coming with a
lantern, chased by the wolves, sent to take me to the monastery
[Tismana]. I told him, ‘Don’t go back!’ And those who were
waiting for us would have thought: if he doesn’t return, then
the wolves ate him; but if he comes, he comes. I begged him
not to return. He said, ‘It’s not possible!’ He departed again,
with his lantern, and the wolves appeared in front o f him. And
again I saw lights on the walls. I said to myself, ‘The wolves
chased him back.’ O f course he came back, saying, ‘I ’m not
leaving again!’ Thus I escaped arrest.”
Br. Anghel was ready to be tonsured a monk. The deputy
abbot o f Tismana petitioned the diocese, thus recommending
him to the Archbishop o f Craiova: “Anghel Papacioc is an ex
ceptional member [of the monastery] and truly ready to take
on this sacred vow to God. We inform Your Eminence that the
79
E TE R N ITY IN THE M O M ENT
above-mentioned is thirty-four years o f age, a graduate o f the

School o f Fine Arts with a degree in art education, and a good
carver. And most importantly, regarding his spiritual makeup:
one can see in his character something mystical, and he is
dedicated to God with his whole being. He is quite proficient
on the kliros [choir stand] and wholly resolute in keeping the
hours o f prayer exactly.”7
The abbots plan to tonsure Br. Anghcl did not come to
fruition. “ The exarch o f the monasteries from the Archdiocese
o f Craiova came on inspection. ‘Well, well! Look who lives in
this mountain wilderness!’ And I received an order from Met
ropolitan Firmilian to be the spiritual father o f the seminary.
“I didn’t think anyone could remove me from there.... But
before daybreak, the Securitate came to the Metropolitan and
told him, ‘This one must disappear from here immediately!’
“And the Metropolitan called me and said, ‘Br. Anghel,
you can’t stay any longer. I’m sorry!’
“I replied, ‘I’m leaving! If it’s not possible for me to stay,
I’m leaving!’”
7 Petcu, Părintele Arsenic Papacioc in docum entele Securităţii, p. 157-
8o
C H A P T E R F IV E
TR U E ELDERS
went from Craiova to Bucharest, where

B
RO TH ER A n g h e l
he met Fr. Gherontie (Bălan), whom he knew from Co-
zia Monastery. At his recommendation, Br. Anghel moved to
Sihăstria Monastery in January o f 1949. A few years earlier,
in 1945, Fr. Cleopa (Ilie)1 had been appointed abbot o f the
monastery. A great renewal o f monasticism took place there,
eventually spreading to many monasteries in the vicinity. Desir
ing to unite himself and his monks to his first spiritual father,
Abbot Cleopa arranged for Elder Paisius (Olaru)2 to come
to Sihăstria. The spiritual bonds Anghel formed with these
legendary figures o f Romanian monasticism would remain
throughout his life.
“ 1 gained much fruit from Fr. Cleopa, right from the be
ginning, seeing him serve the Divine Liturgy wearing opinci3—
I, who desired a solitary life, away from modernity.”
“ I always appreciated Fr. Paisius (Olaru) as well. He was
very wise; he was a great elder. I say ‘great’ because he had
1 Elder Cleopa (Ilie) (19 11-19 9 8 ) was chosen unexpectedly to be locum

tenens o f Sihăstria at the age o f twenty-nine. He was an instructor o f the Jesus
Prayer and considered by many to be the spiritual father o f all Romania. See
Archimandrite Ioanichie Bălan, Shepherd o f Souls (Platina, Calif.: St. Herman
o f Alaska Brotherhood, 10 0 0 ).— E d .
2 Elder Paisius (Olaru) (189 7-19 9 0). See Archimandrite Ioanichie
Bălan, A L ittle C om er o f Paradise (Platina, Calif.: St. Herman o f Alaska
Brotherhood, 10 16 ).— E d .
3 O pin ci: traditional peasant footwear no longer worn in most parts o f
the country.— E d .
81
Left to right: Elders

Paisius (Olaru) and
Clcopa (Hie) in 1970.
great discernment. When he heard a Confession, he did not

rush to impose a penance. He had a balanced pastoral manner.
He did not hasten to defer to the local practice, which was
very harsh in giving penances. He would weigh the penance
based on the person, his repentance, the depth o f his heart.
Confession is not about applying the canons as they are: they
have their flexibility. Even St. Basil the Great, in canon sev
enty-four, gives the spiritual father this freedom to personally
weigh the penance that should be given to those who con
fess. He was not interested in the Confession itself, nor in the
penance itself, but in the salvation o f a human being. For St.
John Chrysostom says: ‘D o you want to give him years [of
penitence]? N o! Heal his wound!’ This is the goal, to help
him be saved, because Christ did not come to annihilate hu
man nature, but to transfigure it. The purpose [o f a penance]
82.
TRUE ELDERS
isn’t to torture someone for the sake o f salvation, but [for the
penitent] to acquire a state o f the constant presence [o f God],
in a quest for God with the heart....
“ Therefore, Fr. Paisius was characterized by his great dis
cernment, and more so by his love for his spiritual children,
with whom he identified himself.
“ I remember when I went o ff (shortly after settling down
at Sihăstria) into the so-called wilderness.·* It was a very hard
winter, and I was a novice at the monastery, enrolled in the
brotherhood o f Sihăstria. Anyway, we [Br. Anghel and Fr.
Cleopa] departed from the other brothers in a very secret man
ner. There was so much snow; it had snowed for thirteen days
and nights straight. And, at our departure, Fr. Paisius gave me
eighteen cubes o f sugar.
“Years later, I wrote to Fr. Cleopa about those eighteen
pieces o f sugar. And ever since, 1 have continued to ponder this
issue. Why did he give me sugar, when Fr. Cleopa had given
me a shepherds knapsack with rusks as my only food? Surely,
1 thought, it was to sweeten me in this bitterness o f solitude,
o f the wilderness— especially because it was a very challenging
time as well: there was so much snow. And I told Fr. Cleopa
[when I wrote him], and I continue to say: to this day I haven’t
finished those sugar cubes!4 5
“ When I went to Sihăstria to visit him [Fr. Paisius], short
ly before his death, he was in bed. It was announced that I
was coming and that 1 wanted to pay him a visit. He was ly
ing in bed, and I knelt so that we could be on the same level.
4 This was his first time in the wilderness (i.e., far o ff in the mountains),
being sent by the great elders o f Sihăstria, who had seen his spiritual depth,
but, more importantly, wanted to protect him from the authorities, who were
following him .— T r a n s .
5 W hen asked by one o f his spiritual children, “ H ow is it that you never
finished them? D o you still have some?” Fr. Arsenie smiled and said that their
spiritual flavor and sweetness never ended.— T r a n s .
83
Sihăstria Monastery in 1008.
Nothing was said then, not even ‘Bless,’ but he said to me, '1
have sinned; I ’m a thief; I’m a fornicator; I ’m proud!’6 Sud
denly he began to name many sins, and I, assisting in this con
fession, said in turn, ‘I also committed the same sins, I did this;
I did that as well...!’ This was our last encounter. I remember
Fr. Paisius with great pleasure. He was not just a simple father;
he was also a great believer and ascetic, my dear ones. Let us
take care to commemorate him.”
When Br. Anghel returned from the wilderness, he took
up a place o f authority in the monastery. His unsullied life, his
experience in the army and as a mayor, and the spiritual life
he had cultivated in prison combined to make him a natural
leader in the spiritual life. His great love for the brothers o f
Sihăstria shines through in his recollections o f his time there:
“At Sihăstria, I protected one o f the fathers— his name was
Mina— a hermit and a great ascetic. I defended him in church:
6 O ut o f his great humility, Fr. Paisius was naming sins that had been a
temptation in thought.—T r a n s .
84
TRUE ELDERS
some youths were pulling his kamilavka, 7 distracting him from

prayer, and he kept turning around and looking. After seeing
me defend him, he specially remembered me. On other occa
sions, I escorted Fr. Mina by his arm when we went on various
processions with holy water [during the Great Blessing o f the
Waters or at Theophany] or artos* [at Pascha] across the fields.
I took him by the arm, for he was elderly. My name was then
Br. Anghel....
“Many years later, I went there [to Sihăstria] after I was
tonsured and ordained a priest. I ran into this Fr. Mina in the
woods or thereabouts, while I was walking with Fr. Cleopa.
When I saw him I said, ‘Bless, Father! Are you still commemo
rating me, Father?’
‘“ Yes, dear, yes. Look, look!’ And he showed me a paper,
torn and worn out from so many commemorations, pointing
out where ‘Brother Anghel’ was written.
“ I said, ‘Father, now my name is Arsenie.’
“And he repeated, ‘Arsenie, Arsenie, Arsenie!’ He was
memorizing it, so he could remember me.
“But before this, Fr. Cleopa told him, ‘Remember me, Fr.
M ina!’
“And although he [Fr. Cleopa] was his abbot, Fr. Mina asked
him, ‘W hat’s your name?’ He did not even know the name o f
his abbot! At the same time— it was amazing— he remembered
me because I had come to his rescue, but he didn’t know the
name o f his abbot. Still, he was a man o f great asceticism.
“ Well, this was an encouraging experience for me, and I
understood how beautiful it is, what an example for us to fol
low, in keeping our promise— if we pledge to pray for some
one, we have to do so consistently. This was, at least for me, a
meaningful example.
' K am ilavka: a monastic hat.

8 A rtos: a bread blessed at the end o f the Paschal service and carried in
processions throughout Bright W eek.— E d .
85
“It was my turn for kitchen duties, and I asked the breth
ren if they liked my food, and they replied, ‘We don’t like it,
Br. Anghel, but we love you, our brother!’
“ [After a while] Fr. Cleopa did not allow me to be called
‘Brother’ Anghel. I would take his place when the abbot
would take the sheep up to the mountain, and I would re
main as abbot, teaching the people. The people were troubled,
‘How is this? He’s only a novice?’ And they would call me ‘Fr.
Anghel.’”
Even before Anghel was a priest and a spiritual father,
his word was “a mighty word” that could turn the hearts o f
the people to repentance, to living the commandments o f the
Lord.
One time an old man who was struggling with smoking came
to see Fr. Cleopa. The elder told him, “Stop smoking, old man!
There are heavy penances for this sin.” But the old man did not
listen to him. He went to see Br. Anghel also, who said, “Christ is
asking you to stop smoking, old man!”
The old man replied, “Christ is really asking me?”
“Yes!” And right then the old man took all the packs of
cigarettes he had on him, threw them out, and never smoked
again.
Although Br. Anghel was just a novice, he had a great
influence on the sincere and dedicated souls that sought his
guidance. “One time two young men came to me at Sihăstria,
and I told them about the importance o f monasticism. Later
I became the spiritual father at the Neamţ Monastic Semi
nary, the only seminary in the country at that time.9 Since
the Communists wanted to eliminate “the factory o f priests,"
as they called it, I would formally place the young men in
monasteries [but not actually tonsure them], and then I
would send them to seminary. (At that time only monks were
9 A ll the others had been closed by the Communists.— E d .
86
TRUE ELDERS
Archimandrite Iachint
(Unciuleac) o f Puma.
allowed to become priests.) Once a young man came to apply

to the seminary and I told him about the stipulation. He ac
cepted and we went together to Sihăstria. On the way we saw
wolves attacking the sheep and the shepherds fighting with
them.... I looked at him and asked him, ‘Listen, why are you
just using the monastery as a springboard? Would you like to
become a monk?’ He agreed. He told me, ‘Father, are you Br.
Anghel by any chance?’ He recognized me; he was one o f the
young men to whom I had spoken about monasticism when
I was a novice at Sihăstria. Afterwards he was sent to Putna
Monastery, and later on he became abbot. He reposed recent
ly [in June 1998], while confessing the abbot [his successor];
he died in his chair.” W hile recounting this story, Fr. Arsenie
took a photo and showed it to those present. It was a photo
87
E TE R N ITY IN TH E M O M E NT
o f Archimandrite Iachint (Unciuleac)10 o f Puma Monastery.

Impressed, Fr. Arsenie exclaimed, “Behold, what a life!”
According to Elder Cleopa: “Ever since he was a novice, he
has preached. He was named Br. Anghel. When we received
him here, I had him as a disciple at the monastery. And I had a
chair, an armchair on which I would sleep at night as a young
priest, to be more watchful.
“Once he asked me, ‘Would you allow me to sit on that
chair, when you’re not at home?’
“I told him, ‘Sit!’ And after that, he would lecture them
from that chair, and he would preach beautifully, teaching
them.... He has a great love for teaching people. And he has a
saying, I think he repeats it even to this day: ‘Brethren, don’t
play games with your salvation!’ Thus he tells them: ‘Don’t
play games—you are your salvation!’” 111
111 Archimandrite Iachint (Unciuleac) (19 14 -19 9 8 ) was, as described by

Fr. Ioanichie (Bălan) in one o f his books, “the most revered spiritual father
and abbot o f our beloved Bucovina.”— E d .
11 Archimandrite Ioanichie Bălan, ed., N e vorbeşte Părintele Cleopa [El
der Cleopa talks to us], znd ed., vol. 10 (Roman: Diocese o f Roman Press,
io o i) ,p . 148.
88
C H A P T E R SIX
A N EW MAN
though still a brother o f Sihăstria, was

N 1 949 B r . A n g h e l ,
I assigned to help at the Bible Institute,1 working as a sculp

tor and graphic designer. While fulfilling this task, he stayed at
Antim Monastery, serving there as sacristan in the afternoon.
“ The patriarch was away,” Fr. Arsenie recalled. “So they
called him, saying, ‘Should we tonsure Br. Anghel?’
“‘Tonsure him immediately!’
“And I said, ‘As part o f Sihăstria Monastery, not o f Antim
Monastery!’
“ Fr. Sofian [Boghiu]12 read the prayers at the tonsure ser
vice, and Fr. Benedict [Ghiuş] tonsured me, and my sponsor,
Fr. Petroniu [Tănase]3—whom I didn’t choose myself—cast
lots for the name Arsenie.
1 The Orthodox Bible and Missionary Institute (Institutul Biblic şi de

Misiune Ortodoxă), with its headquarters at the H oly Synod o f the Romanian
Orthodox Church and at Antim Monastery in Bucharest, publishes and dis
tributes the H oly Scripture, religious service books, magazines, and papers on
theology and literature. It also produces and distributes icons and sacred and
religious objects for ecclesiastical and religious use.— T r a n s .
2 Archimandrite Sofian (Boghiu) ( 1 9 11 - 10 0 1 ) , Elder o f Antim M on
astery. Fr. Sofian was a renowned iconographer and spiritual father. H e was
arrested in 1958 for taking part in the Burning Bush prayer meetings centered
at Antim Monastery. After his release in 1964, he returned to Antim , where
he spent the rest o f his life as one o f the most sought-out spiritual fathers in
Romania.— E d .
3 Archimandrite Petroniu (Tănase) ( 19 14 - 10 11) moved to M ount
Athos in 1978. In 1985 he became abbot o f Prodtomou Skete and was instru
mental in its restoration.— E d .
89
“I carved some crosses— I had done some carving in the

past—because I was thinking, ‘Should another [person] make
my tonsure cross?’ And then I made a monastic cross identical
to mine for Fr. Petroniu.4
“Being in church, wearing my mantle, I went to the kliros
to check when St. Arsenius is celebrated, and I found him on
May 8, together with St. John the Evangelist. And the day on
which I was tonsured was September 26—also St. Joh n the
Evangelist! “ The newly tonsured Fr. Arsenic said to himself,
“The Apostle o f love is following me around!” He found this
blessed “coincidence” to be highly significant in his new life.
“I was ordained as a deacon at Calamfideşti, near Rădăuţi,
and as a priest at a convent near Botoşani, at Gafton (because
there was a hierarchical service). I received the ordination to
4 Fr. Petroniu wore this cross for the rest o f his life.
90
A NEW M AN
the priesthood on September z6, 1950, exactly one year after I

was tonsured a monk, on the commemoration o f St. John the
Evangelist, the Apostle o f love. This fact inspired me greatly,
and I did not consider it insignificant for this great—priestly
and monastic— responsibility.
“One o f my siblings— my brother— after I was tonsured
and he had seen the service, came to my cell and asked me,
‘Father, am I still allowed to talk to your Reverence?’
“He was younger than I, and he wasn’t educated, but he
was a zealous Christian boy. And I told him, ‘You’re allowed,
but you should be aware that I ’m not quite allowed!’
“At Antim there was a lot o f discussion about the Jesus
Prayer. We had a Sbom ik,s brought by a Russian hieromonk,
Ivan (Kulygin). We used to call him loan 'the Stranger.’ We were
greatly influenced by him, as he was a great zealot. There was
a father, George (Roşea), a great zealot as well, who, when he
saw the monastic cross I had carved, said that he would give
me a Sbom ik if I would make him a cross. But I told him, ‘I’m
not accepting any Sbom ik; I’m not making any cross, because I
don’t agree with what’s being discussed here. Too much talking
about the prayer o f the heart. Say it (utter it in secret) and keep
silent! This is everything. W hy do you have to wait for instruc
tions? Have you not felt, even by now, that you’re a man o f
Christ?’
“Then a young man came to me, knocked at the door o f
my cell, and said humbly, T kiss your hand, Father! I would
like you to give me the Sbom ik’. (Then only two or three cop
ies o f the book existed in all o f Bucharest. Now it’s published,
but then it could not be found.)
“And I told him, ‘Yes, I’ll give it to you with pleasure!’5
5 The Sbom ik here refers ro an anthology o f Orthodox writings on

prayer compiled by A bbot Chariton o f Valaam Monastery in Russia. It was
subsequently published in English under the title 'Ihe A rt o f Prayer.— E d .
91
And I took a prayer rope and gave it to him. I told him, ‘Here
you go: Shut up and say it [the prayer]: this is the Sbom ik1.’
“I was not ignoring the Sbom ik, but I was very zealous
about saying the prayer, living it at all costs. This was my point
o f view: A deep silence means a deep prayer! ‘Keep silent and
say it!’ You won’t be saved by the fact that you have been in
a spiritual environment, simply satisfying your reason with ex
traordinary, unheard-of examples and quotations. You won’t be
saved! This is one o f the big mistakes made by people who are
sincerely pondering this question. They abandon, to a certain
extent, [the real goal], and they do not aim by every means
for the highest goal— conquering eternity every day, every mo
ment if possible! They’re satisfied with very small accomplish
ments, which are not actually achievements. If you’re not the
master o f yourself, you don’t possess within yourself a shield
[from attacks]. For you to resist, you must bv all means be
truly humble. Only then are you able [to resist]— no matter
how the devils strike and work on your weaknesses. You can’t
achieve perfection immediately, but you should alwavs be in a
position that enables you to fight against the passions.
“Now I should tell you that all those people, who were
holy— Fr. Benedict (Ghiu$), Fr. Sofian, Fr. Petroniu, Fr. Aga-
ton (Sandu Tudor)6—were men from whom you could ben
efit merely by seeing their movements, even if you were not
expecting an answer. They were not satisfied with what they
were saying: they wanted to encompass in a word all that ex
ists, everything that could be said. I f you were receptive to the
spiritual knowledge o f the one present, it meant that God had
6 Later Hieroschemamonk Daniil. Before becoming a monk, he bad

been a naval officer, a poet, a high school teacher, and the founder o f two
magazines. After joining Antim Monastery, he was the initiator and driving
force o f the Burning Bush movement. In 1958 Fr. Daniil was arrested for his
activities and died in 1961, after spending a month in solitary confinement at
A iud.— E d .
92·
A NEW M AN
Fr. Sofian (Boghiu) o f Antim Monastery.
expectations from you, that you already had a great responsi

bility. My point o f view, which I expressed at Antim, was not
to theorize about the prayer, but to live it. And I continued
with this approach. Even today I tell this to myself and oth
ers.”
After Fr. Arsenie was ordained to the priesthood, he was
appointed to be the spiritual father o f the Neamt Monastic
93
E TE R N ITY IN TH E M OM ENT
Seminary." In relating his encounter with the future Archiman

drite Iachint (Unciulcac), mentioned above, Fr. Arsenie alluded
to the method he used to enroll students in the seminary. “ I
would place the boys who wanted to become priests in mon
asteries, to spend one day there, and then I would take them
from the monastery into the seminary. ‘Sir [speaking to the of
ficials], he’s a monk!’ But he was not a monk. I had an agree
ment with the monasteries, with Sihăstria, for we were nearby.
And in this way the seminary was populated. We also had uni
versity professors teaching there.8 Classes would start at eight
o’clock in the morning....
“I was occupied more with Liturgies, even though I was
assigned as a professor o f the History o f Monasticism and o f
Monastic Life. I was teaching the students how to do the Pros-
komedia, since they were future priests. I was showing them
with a potato how to prepare the Proskomedia: ‘Here is how
it’s cut; here is what’s being said!’ I had thirty-five deacons as
students....
“One day I served with a deacon older than the others. I
was telling the students [from in front o f the Royal Doors]
about the Holy Mysteries, which can also appear as Flesh or
as a little Child. For thus the Service Book instructs us: ‘If
there appears, after the consecration o f the bread and wine, a
miracle, namely the form o f bread as Flesh or as a little Child,
and the wine as Blood, and if this vision will not change (that
is, if they would not revert to bread or wine) and thus they
will remain unchanged, the priest should by no means com
mune, because these are not the Body and Blood o f Christ,
but a miracle from God, revealed only for unbelief or for other
reasons. And the priest should take anotherprosphoron (if the
' In 1953, it would be closed.— E d .

8 Some o f those who participated at the spiritual gatherings at Antim
M onastery— Fr. Petroniu, Fr. Sofian, Fr. Benedict, and Andrei Scrima— were
also teaching at the seminary.
94
A NEW M AN
appearance o f only the bread has changed) and, as shown above,

do and say the Proskomedia on the prosphoron and take out
the H oly Lamb; and he should set aside the One miraculously
changed, guarding It with reverence, and he should start from
the prayer: With these blessed powers we also ..., and he should
do all things according to the order o f service. And the second
time he should not say anything above the Chalice. If the wine
in the Chalice has also changed into Blood, he should pour It
into another worthy cup, or into another clean vessel, pouring
wine again and saying over it the prayers o f Proskomedia, and
thus, in order, consecrate them also, following the typikon,‘>and
at the time o f Communion to commune after the custom, and
complete the service.’ 9
10
“ What was the deacon, with whom I was serving, think
ing? For he was consuming the Holy Gifts at that moment....
‘Hmm..., it’s not quite as Fr. Arsenie says!’ And his mouth
filled with Blood, and with Flesh instead o f bread, and he fell
to the floor and the Chalice fell onto the Table o f Oblation....
I was a meter and a half from the deacon’s door, for the cha
pel was small. I turned around and reprimanded him, and they
reverted to bread and wine.... He had doubted; he was not liv
ing through faith. Then why are you preparing yourselffor the
priesthood?
“Thus it has been revealed, throughout the history o f the
Church, to emperors and to a whole series o f unbelievers, how
the Savior took the priest’s place ... how God did not cease be
ing merciful with unbelievers, for only to them was it revealed,
to satisfy them! The Liturgy is not to be disputed; there is
nothing symbolic; everything is true. What? Are you playing
games with these things!? God forbid!”
The Securitate took notice o f Father’s presence here and,
9 Typikon: the rule o f church services.

10L itu rghier [The Liturgikon] (Bucharest: The Biblical and Missionary
Institute o f the Romanian Orthodox Church Press, 10 0 0 ), p. 465.
95
through informers they had planted, found out that “he is a

very spiritual man, doing his duty as spiritual father precise
ly according to the rules o f the school, to books, and to the
canons o f the Holy Fathers.” 11 He was under surveillance for a
few months, and arrested in December 1951. “ They forced me
to leave the office I had at the seminary,” Father related. After
being released he did not return to the seminary, but went to
Slatina Monastery.1
1 Pcrcu, P ărintele A rsenic Papacioc in docum entele Securităţii, p. 160.
96
C H A P T E R SEV EN
T H E S O U N D OF F A L L IN G L E A V E S
1952. F r . A r s e n i e returned to Elder Cleopa, who was

I
N
now living at Slatina Monastery. Fr. Cleopa, along with
thirty monks front Sihăstria, had been sent by Patriarch Justin
ian1 to renew this monastery farther north in Bucovina.
Fr. Arsenie s stay at the monastery was short-lived: the Securi
tate was threatening both him and Elder Cleopa— accusing them
o f religious propaganda— and so they decided to retreat into the
Neamţ Mountains, not far from the monastery. They would re
main there for two years, living more independently from each
other this time, engaged in the struggles o f the wilderness.
“I kept pondering why great saints like St. Basil the Great
and others, who had tremendous opportunities, desired to live
in the wilderness. The wilderness is something unique; it is an
other world. In the wilderness it’s just you and God. There you
have to become friends with the forest. Life in the wilderness
is such that an outsider can’t understand what happens there;
it’s a presence2 and the entire creation is contained in the heart
and in the action o f the recluse. I also knew fear in those years,
but God helped me remain vigilant.
“ The temptations were great; I was in a constant state o f
1 Patriarch Justinian (19 01—1977) served as head o f the Romanian O r

thodox Church from 1948 to 1977. He was instrumental in the survival o f the
Romanian Church during those times o f brutal atheist persecution, especially
the two decades after the Second World War.— E d .
- That is, an awareness o f the presence o f God, founded on a constant
preservation o f love and prayer.— T r a n s .
97
Si.uin.i Monastery.
watchfulness. I had placed icons in all the pine trees surround

ing my hut.... You can never drop your guard, even in the
slightest....
“The wilderness is difficult. You have to be watchful, for
the devil doesn’t relent, even for a moment. I prayed to the
Mother o f God in every difficulty, and, as a weak one, I would
say, ‘Lord, I ’m not a hermit; I’m here by accident. Don’t aban
don me!’ I didn’t give up. The Mother o f God helped me. I
continued as a hermit.
“Fr. Cleopa intended that we remain in the wilderness for
good.... I was feeling the call [to return], and I contended that
you can better fulfill the Scripture in the monastery, by seeing
if you can keep the commandment o f love. Life in the wilder
ness is highly laudable; we have to understand that the prayers
o f a hermit benefit the world enormously. There is no authentic
life in the wilderness i f you don't have the whole world, as it is, in
your heart! I was not at the level o f a hermit.... You have to go
into the wilderness as a hero, after you’ve overcome the world.
98
TH E SOUND OF FALLING LEAVES
I greatly benefited from reading the Egyptian Patericon, where

humility prevails.
“In the midst o f a throng o f temptations, I was able to read
something applicable from the Holy Fathers: Temptations leave
the impression that you don’t have the strength to resist them,
but it’s not true. Don’t make the mistake o f underestimating
your powers. Christ would be greatly grieved that we were bap
tized in His name (that is, in the name o f the Holy Trinity)
but don’t trust His word: Be o f good cheer; I have overcome the
world (John 16:33). Clearly, He said this with great authority,
so that we would follow Him and overcome the world. The
big mistake is to say, ‘I’m not the one [able to follow H im ]!’
I received the answer I needed at that moment in my reading,
and I cried aloud, ‘Great are the Holy Fathers!’ They interpret
ed and explained ... for they were helped by God’s grace. So,
the first mistake is to consider yourself weaker than the one
to whom Christ said: ‘Have courage to overcome the world!’
Certainly, it’s the world within us!
“On another occasion I was trying to act with humility,
thinking, ‘I ’m nothing,’ before God. Anyway, I forced myself,
and I was delivered from temptation.... I shouted: Great is a
humble man before God! This greatly encouraged me, and I no
ticed that the grace o f God helped me, since I couldn’t measure
how much humility I had. I couldn’t see myself except as one
less humble than all the people in this world.
“ I saw how the devil stirs things up, how insistently he
fights to place images before you.... And a great temptation
befell me, a temptation I could in no way accept. The devil
wouldn’t give up, but neither would I, not at all! Very tor
menting! You can’t understand what the torments o f the wil
derness are! I said like a child, ‘I f I pray to St. George, who
knows where St. George might be? Others are also praying to
him !’ And so I said, ‘I should pray to my guardian angel; he
has been with me since baptism!’ And I immediately started to
99
pray: ‘Holy guardian angel...!’ Please believe me! He immedi

ately freed me from all temptation, so clearly and so complete
ly! The guardian angel! And since then I have great reverence
for my guardian angel.
“If you err, grace leaves you, and God allows these tempta
tions to make you wise, to humble you. I didn’t receive a re
ward for cutting o ff my own will, but the devil was making me
sufficiently wise. Do you think it’s just a small drop o f wisdom?
This is knowledge that benefits you your entire life, and you re
alize that you have to be in constant control [to win the battle
with the devil].
“The withdrawal into the wilderness was not a calculated
or planned withdrawal.... Nevertheless, I didn’t survive merely
on a certain longing for the wilderness. On the contrary, there
were enormous obstacles for me. There, the battle is exclusively
against the devil. The problems concerning food are insignifi
cant.... This was the issue: keeping the devil at a distance. He
causes you suffering i f he gets hold o f you in some way. You can’t
resist him unless an authentic humility rules over you, a true
humility. Never see yourself as humble. Humility is the art o f
staying in your place.
“I can boldly say, not that I lived in the wilderness, but sim
ply that I suffered the harshness o f winter— which was dread
ful.3 You would not see people, you were in the woods— but
this does not represent the wilderness. The wilderness, without
a doubt, signifies a state beyond human nature, beyond exalted
human reasoning, because the spiritual life is not a calculated
life, but a life lived without words.
“Certainly, if I had known what [spiritual] level I had
3 According to one o f Fr. Arsenic’s spiritual sons, he did not consider

him self worthy to be considered a hermit. This was said out o f humility, o f
course, but there was also some truth to this. He had another calling: to be a
confessor in the prisons and a spiritual father. On the other hand, Fr. Cleopa
had this calling to be a hermit and attained to that stature.— E d .
IO O
attained, I would no longer have belonged in the wilderness!

Only the desire to be as close as possible to God kept me there;
but you have to fight very earnestly for this.
“ I would sleep on a board, in my hut.4 I had the habit
o f jumping up immediately after I awoke, without hesitating
(there’s an inclination to say, ‘I’ll lie here a little longer!’). I
wanted to be the master o f myself, to overcome the state o f
hesitation. One morning I remained [lying down] a bit lon
ger. The devil pulled me down and hit me on the head with
my vest! O f course, I arose quickly: I had to defend myself.
Then I said to myself, ‘I’m not a hermit, I’m here by accident.’
(In the wilderness the devil leads you to perdition if you’re not
humble.) And thus I was delivered [from temptation]. Then I
shouted, ‘Great is the power o f humility!’
“ W hy did it happen like this? For I had many temptations.
The devil would shout at me from outside, he would throw
snowballs at the walls o f my hut. Many times I thought that
somebody had come, but there was no one, and then many
times I wouldn’t answer these provocations. Still, he would
tempt me from afar and more often through thoughts, but this
is another matter.
“ He dared [to beat me] because he had a claim on me: I
did not get up quicklv! As a human being, I fell asleep for a
few seconds.... ‘Devil, if this is your gain and your goal, then
you have given me courage through what you did to me. I
have gained by the loss, for I saw your demonic powers and
schemes.’ I must say that this is a very oppressive conversation.
You don’t really desire to converse with him— for he desires
it. One should not converse with the devil. You have to ignore
him. If you speak to him, you acknowledge him. Satan is not a
power, but merely one who is tolerated by God. The power is
4 This is a hermit’s hur, dug into the ground, three feet high (at most),
five feet wide, and six feet long. It is covered with branches, leaves, and soil.—
Ed.
io i
with us, for we are baptized, we have a guardian angel, we pray

to God. D o you want to banish Satan?... Talk to Christ, pray
to the Theotokos! Without a doubt, in the wilderness and in
the realm o f discernment— a more spiritually advanced life—
any kind o f mistake is terrible. The smallest evil is not a little
thing in life. Make sure the devil does not have a hold on you
through anything. Our Lord Jesus, our Savior, wants us whole;
only Satan desires us through deceit, by grasping even a single
tip o f our finger, for he, the cunning one, knows that in this
way he can master our entire being.
“Someone knocked at Jesus’ door, and Jesus asked, ‘ W ho’s
there?’
“‘It’s me, Your great ascetic!’
“ ‘You’re not ready; I ’m not opening the door for you!’
“The ascetic was worried: ‘I wonder why?’ And he went
again to the door and knocked.
“ ‘Who’s there?’ asked the Lord.
“ ‘It is You!’
“ ‘I f you are Me, enter!’—That is to say, God gathers with
those who arc gods by grace.
“So, it is not permitted to knock at Christ’s door with
stains, since any little sin is not small! But we shouldn’t con
strue this to mean that our struggle is to become perfect only
in not committing sins! This is a little brash, and it is not the
way o f humility. You have to believe that the grace o f God is
helping you and that if you’re something, it’s only by G od’s
grace. This is how I understood the words o f St. Silouan, ut
tered to him by the Savior: 'Keep thy m ind in hell, and despair
not!"* Our deeds can’t save us; therefore, we have a need tor
a continuous and authentic humility; not a rational humility,
but a true humility.”
5 Archimandrite Sophrony (Sakharov), Saint Silouan the Atbonite,

trans. by Rosemary Edmonds (Essex: Patriarchal and Stavropegic Monastery
o f St. John the Baptist, 1991), p. 4 1 .
ioz
While living in the wilderness, Fr. Arsenic strove to observe

the traditions o f the Church. Thus, on days when fish was al
lowed, he would take a fish bone he had preserved and boil it
in a can, drinking the water. In doing this, he could say he had
something with fish. Then he would dry the bone and keep it
for next time. But after so much use, the bone no longer pos
sessed even the smallest flavor o f fish—yet he was keeping the
rule. He had learned from his mother the saying, “At least a
fish bone should get in your mouth on fish days.”
“ In the wilderness I saw how little a man needed to live.
A shepherds knapsack filled with rusks was my only source o f
food. I’d eat a bit o f a rusk and it sustained me for the whole
day. On rare occasions I’d find mushrooms that grew on trees.
We called them ‘trout’— they were like bananas, very tasty.
Once I found some mushrooms and I dried them by the stove.
I had improvised a stove, stacking up some stones and placing
an iron plate on top. I kept those mushrooms for the winter.
But after eating them, 1 felt ill. Occasionally I found a dried
crab, and that was a treat. In the summer I drank water from
the spring. (These huts were built near springs o f water.) In the
winter I melted snow and drank the water.”
One time Fr. Arsenic went looking for mushrooms. As he
was returning, he wandered into a thicket, unable to see two
feet in front o f him, and got lost. He began to pray fervently to
the Mother o f God and all o f a sudden the cloudy sky became
clear. He saw and recognized a mountain in the distance, en
abling him to reorient himself. Exiting the thicket, he realized
that if he had advanced another fifty feet he would have fallen
o ff a cliff, but the Mother o f God had protected him.
On numerous occasions he was saved from the wild beasts,
which “come not to bite you, but to devour you... Nonethe
less, the greatest danger in the wilderness was not the beasts,
but the devil.” Having been saved from countless dangers
since childhood caused him to later say, “ I’m ninety-six and
10}
I ’ve examined my past the best I could, and I was amazed,

humbled ... seeing God’s presence. I ’ve seen G od’s work in ev
erything: my encounters with wolves, with bears, my fourteen
years spent in prison, the years in the wilderness. I would often
look attentively at a bug— small as the tip o f a needle— and
say, ‘Look, God knows it. And there are millions and trillions
like it.’”
On occasion he would go to Coroi’s Ravine, taking ref
uge in the cave o f St. Theodora o f Sihla6 during times o f heavy
snowfalls. Later he recounted, “It’s a great thing to see places
where people have struggled. I stayed for some time in the cave
o f St. Theodora. I would climb on a rock (now there are steps)
where there was a cave with water, and the water would never
stop dripping, although it had no collecting pool, and I would
also drink from the place where the saint used to drink....
“I had read somewhere that a deer can’t give birth it she
hears a leaf falling— the noise bothers her. I didn’t quite un
derstand this saying then. When I ended up in the wilderness,
I could hear a leaf falling on other dried leaves, and I would
tremble. Only then did I understand this saying. You know,
I don’t hear very well; some members o f my family even had
hearing problems.” That trembling at the fall o f a leaf was not
due to sensory perception, which would have been very diffi
cult even for a person with perfect hearing, and more so for Fr.
Arsenie. It was by virtue o f spiritual purification, o f extraordi
nary discernment, and o f constant watchfulness.
“I was afraid to tell people that I had been in the wilder
ness.7 You have to know the voice o f the forest, a silent voice
6 St. Theodora labored there in the beginning o f the seventeenth centu

ry. A t the end o f her life, two monks from Sihăstria discovered the saint, after
following the birds that brought her bread from the refectory. They found her
enveloped in Uncreated Light. Her relics were in the cave for many years, and
many who came on pilgrimage received healing and consolation.— E d .
7 O ut o f humility he did not want to compare him self to a hermit.— E d .
10 4
THE SOUND OF FALLING LEAVES
that you can know only if you have a great spiritual depth. As
a man you must acquire the identity of the forest ... otherwise
you cannot survive.
“ When you go off and become a hermit in the forest to
live a life pleasing to God, the forest is no longer a mere land
scape o f beautiful, old trees. In that moment the forest has to
receive you; you have to unite with it.... The thick trees have to
cover you, to protect you. There are rimes when you encounter
bears in the forest and you have to hide behind a large tree.
You have to do this immediately and in perfect silence, other
wise the beast will tear you apart.”
Once a Russian hermit visited Fr. Arsenie at Techirghiol
Monastery, seeking a profitable word. Fr. Arsenie wanted to
test him and so he asked him, “Tell me, what is the voice o f the
105
forest?” The hermit trembled. He understood what Fr. Arscnie

was asking him.
Fr. Arsenie would meet with Elder Cleopa from time to
time. They would confess each other and commune every two
to three weeks, as they had the Holy Mysteries with them.
Once a month, a good Christian from the neighboring vil
lage would bring them some food. Although there were many
wolves in the area, the man did not fear going into the deep
forest— trusting the prayers o f the two hidden hermits.
Fr. Arsenie would recount his life to Elder Cleopa, with
its temptations and sufferings. “In our wandering through the
mountains I would tell Fr. Cleopa about my sufferings [impris
onments] and about the death o f my brother [Radu]. He wept
with me.” Elder Cleopa told him, “Br. Anghel, I have learned
from your life as much as from the Patericon. God is great and
He will help us continue our journey to the end.”
While struggling together in the wilderness, Fr. Cleopa and
Fr. Arsenie had a unity o f soul that did not prevent them from
disagreeing with each other:
“I was with Fr. Cleopa in the Ncamt Mountains.... A dis
cussion heated up between us regarding the way one should
struggle [for salvation]. And I told him, ‘Father, you had two
brothers, the monk Gherasim, who was ascetic, and Br. Vasile,
who was watchful.’
“Monk Gherasim used to beat himself with a rope, seventy
to eighty strokes at a time, and sleep in a coffin lined with oat
straw and a cross at his head. He would carry soil in a wheel
barrow, in order to subdue the horse (that is, the body). Br.
Vasile, on the other hand, had his obedience to tend the sheep,
and he had great reverence for the Mother o f God. He always
sighed: ‘The Queen ... the Queen ... the Queen....’
“And Br. Vasile was asked, ‘Do you want to go into the wil
derness?’ ‘With great pleasure, but allow me to take along a
barrel o f cheese, too!’
106
“And the devils came and beat Br. Vasile in the courtyard o f
Sihăstria Monastery in the middle o f the day. There were cries
heard; the monks gathered with the abbot, Ioanichie (M o
roi)— who was a great zealot. Br. Vasile, who had been caught
by surprise, cried out to the Mother o f God; ‘The Queen ...
the Queen....’ She actually came to his aid at that moment, to
protect the one who was asking her for help.
“Abbot Ioanichie asked him, ‘What did the Queen tell
you?’
“ ‘She told me to calm down, for she will come in three
days to take me!’
“ The devils ceased beating him and on the third day he re
posed.
“And 1 asked Fr. Cleopa, ‘Which one was more pleasing
to God? Monk Gherasim, the ascetic, or Br. Vasile, who was
watchful ?”
“And Fr. Cleopa answered, ‘Br. Vasile, for Fr. Paisius [Ola-
ru] says so, also!’
“ Well, Fr. Cleopa was very complex in his own way; he was
not merely ascetic. He later started telling me about watchful
ness, which astounded me. However, we’re talking here about
the system, the principle toward which you incline— for not
by speaking but bv advancing do we reach [the goal]. Many
monks struggle, imitating Fr. Cleopa, and afterwards they
think like this: ‘Lord, I made a thousand prostrations; give me
something, too!’
“ The ‘pedal’ o f struggling should not be pushed too much,
but rather the focus [of the struggle is what is important].
Time is not the deciding factor, but rather the quality o f liv
ing in a continuous spiritual disposition, not giving occasion
to dark grieving, in a sincere and heartfelt repentance that will
indeed bring a man true humility. This humility is exceedingly
acceptable [to God], necessary for forgiveness, and beneficial
for new aspirations and revelations beyond human reason. The
10 7
love o f God enriches the humble man more than someone who
is rigid in sorrow and harsh struggles. The Lord Christ gives
Himself more readily to a wounded, yet repentant and humble,
heart than to a heart that has fasted and prayed, but which, o f
course, is asking for its rights. St. Basil the Great says, ‘Neither
the widow nor the virgin have any other rank in heaven than
the one dictated by humility.’
“Let me tell you something else: What’s the meaning o f obe
dience? When two o f you are traveling, one should always obey
the other! A terrible rain caught us in a forest o f small trees. Fr.
Cleopa on one side and I on the other were looking for the thick
est bush to take shelter under. Fr. Cleopa was insisting, from un
der the branches, that I come to him; we were about fifty yards
apart. I was thinking that my bush was better. But I said to myself:
‘I should obey!’ I ran there and [almost immediately] lightning
struck right around the place that I had considered a better shel
ter from the rain. I was in awe: See what obedience does for you!
God inspired him to insist that I come to him, on the grounds
that he had found a better place. But the grace o f God was actu
ally at work to save me from being struck.
“We both had the intention to find rain shelter under a
huge oak tree, but lightning also struck that oak tree before
we could get there. Then we both saw that we were protected
by God, and we basically stood in the rain, consenting to let
G od’s will be done. Thus, accepting this bath that came from
above, with all our love we embraced each other and believed
that God was visibly protecting and helping us, but that this
was impossible without sacrifice.
“ Without a doubt, the cenobitic life must be seen as the
most complete form o f monasticism. It enables you to succeed
in truly cutting o ff your own will, and, in being transformed in
this way, you realize how much you have commended yourself
to God’s will. Commend yourself completely unto H im — you
do so when you’ve cut o ff your own will.
10 8
“Nevertheless, the wilderness remains an extremely impor

tant way o f life, because o f the power that the hermits prayer
exerts on the world. However, heaven is not just for hermits—
they’re an exception.
“It has been observed in novices, or even in nuns, that as
soon as they join a monastery, they develop a longing for the
wilderness.... They think that some angels o f light will be wait
ing for them in the wilderness. There are some o f those— but
they’re demons. The demons cut to pieces those naughty ones
who long for the wilderness. Anyway, much could be said
about the desert, and I even compare it with prison. Prison has
another ‘professor,’ another focus: the cunning o f the people
before which you must resist...”
Toward the end o f their self-exile in the wilderness, Frs. Ar-
senie and Cleopa lived outside in the forest near Slatina Mon
astery. Tliis fulfilled the desire o f the fathers o f the monastery
to have the opportunity to see the desert dwellers. “At night Fr.
Cleopa slept under a fir tree— I under another one, two yards
away. In the morning a snake came from under my place of
rest (as I was sleeping on some roots). Not very long after that,
lightning shattered the fir tree under which I had slept (split
ting it in half). I had a premonition that they [the authorities]
would arrest me. And they really did!
“W hile I was living in the wilderness, the Communists ma
ligned the Church, saying that all the monastics in the wilder
ness were there to shelter and help the opponents o f the regime.
Then the patriarch called all o f us to return to the monaster
ies. Fr. Cleopa and I obeyed him and returned to Slatina M on
astery. Upon our return, I saw a monk and was amazed, for
I hadn’t seen any people in a long time, and 1 said to myself,
‘H ow easy it is to live in the world!”’
10 9
C H A P T E R E IG H T
D W E L L I N G IN U N I T Y
u n e OF 1954, after two years in the desert, Frs. Arsenie
I
NJ
and Cleopa returned to Bucharest at the request o f Patri
arch Justinian, who welcomed them at the patriarchate.
Fr. Arsenie greatly respected the patriarch, considering him
“very brave.” Fie spoke very highly o f him to other prisoners at
Aiud, defending him before those who accused him o f being
a man o f the regime. Fr. Arsenie understood his cautious and
intelligent approach in dealing with the Communist regime: a
very beneficial approach for the Church during those times o f
persecution. He would say, “ The war is a game o f intelligence,
but it is still a war.”
From Bucharest the patriarch sent them on a mission to mon
asteries around the city to revive the spiritual life o f these commu
nities. Thus they went to the monasteries o f Ţigăneşti, Pasărea,
Căldăruşani, Suzana, Zamfira, and Cheia. At Pasărea Monastery
Elder Cleopa would usually confess the older nuns, and Fr. Arse
nie the younger ones. From this period, Elder Cleopa recalled:
“As we were serving Holy Unction at Pasărea Monastery,
all o f a sudden two first sergeants with machine guns came into
the church:
“ ‘In the name o f the law, you are under arrest. Follow us!’
“Therefore I said to Arsenie: ‘So, Arsenie, from the wil
derness to the patriarchate, and from the patriarchate we’re
going to prison!’ But Arsenie, who had spent years in prison,
said, ‘Hush, Brother, we were sent here by the patriarch o f the
Church. They can shoot me now!’”
no
DW ELLING IN U N IT Y
Brothers oi SLitiru Monastery (and a laywoman) in 1957.

Igumcn Arsenic is third from right.
When the nuns o f Pasărea Monastery heard o f the arrest,

they rushed to the poliee station; there were over a hundred of
them. Some had left so hastily that they were still carrying their
tailoring tools. They began to make a terrible noise. The militia
officers released the fathers, fearing the nuns and knowing they
had no grounds for arresting them.
Elder Cleopa continues: “They gave us our identity cards
back, and when we returned to the monastery some of the nuns
were singing, others were crying. They said, 'Let’s hide them
[the fathers], so they won’t be taken tonight!’ I was more fool
ish, for I hadn’t been imprisoned, but poor Arsenie had gone
through a lot. He said: ‘No, Brothers, were official delegates.
God, W ho has protected us during the day, will guard us also
through the night. We’re staying here. As God wishes!’— For
we had our documents with us!”
The nuns o f Pasărea and Ţigăneşti Monasteries rejoiced in
the spiritual guidance they had received from the two great
spiritual fathers. An elderly nun from Ţigăneşti Monastery
III
E T E R N IT Y IN TH E M O M E NT
presented Fr. Arsenie with a miracle-working icon o f the M oth

er o f God, saying, “You are a man chosen by God ... and I am
entrusting you with this icon to preserve it from the wrath o f
these times.” Many o f his spiritual daughters from these monas
teries kept in touch with him, seeking his counsel at the mon
asteries where God’s providence would take him.
The two fathers disliked being confined to the patriarchate.
In addition, Fr. Arsenie did not like the idea o f going from one
monastery to the other to offer spiritual guidance to monas
tics— thus impinging on the monastics’ relationship with their
spiritual father. He proposed to the patriarch that he give them
a monastery that would keep its doors open to all who desired
to come and ask for profitable counsel.
Thus Slatina Monastery was chosen, where Elder Cleopa
was appointed abbot, and Fr. Arsenie, igumen.1 Years later,
reminiscing about their time spent together, Fr. Cleopa would
say to Fr. Arsenie, “ With great humility and love I remember
the moments we spent together, when you were o f great help
and consolation in my pains and trials. At the same time I con
sidered you to be an angel o f God by my side. You were a G od
fearing man, with great love and courage o f soul in all sorrows,
and you encouraged and comforted me.”12
A multitude o f zealous monks, about n o , gathered around
them. Consequently, the monastery began to be known as a
“spiritual academy.” Many o f the monks formed here were sent
to neighboring monasteries, contributing to their spiritual re
vival. Many played an important role in the life o f the Church
in the years to come.
Seeing the monastery’s spiritual progress under the guid
ance o f these great spiritual fathers, the local metropolitan
1 In Romanian monasteries the igumen is second in command to the

abbot. In monasteries with sketes, each o f the sketes will have its own igumen
who reports to the abbot o f the entire monastery.— E d .
2 Bălan, N e vorbeşte Părintele Cleopa, p. 143.
III
DWELLING IN U N IT Y
assigned to their care five monasteries in that region: Sihăstria,

Sihla, Raşca, Rarău, and Cămârzani. Known as the Brother
hood o f St. Theodore the Studite, it had its center at Slatina
Monastery. This new form o f monasticism in Moldavia— six
monasteries united by a spiritual center— brought about a
much desired spiritual renewal in the region.
The brotherhood followed the rule o f St. Theodore the Stu
dite, observing some o f the oldest monastic practices. Like sol
diers always ready for battle, some o f the brethren, including Fr.
Arsenie, would sleep wearing a cassock (specifically made for
sleeping) and their belt. The brotherhood shared everything in
the monastery, including their clothing. Every cell had everything
necessary for a monk; hence, if he had to move into a different
cell he would only have to take along his monastic ryassa. Every
thing was simple, but orderly, so the monks would not be encum
bered with material cares. Neither the abbot nor the brethren ever
locked their cells, not even at night or while traveling.3
“ We had there at Slatina (where I held the position o f igu-
men) such harmony and love; there were about n o monks.
It was not simply a monastery, it was a spiritual academy:
Fr. Cleopa as abbot, Fr. Emilian (Olaru), a great spiritual fa
ther, Fr. Ghcrontie (Bălan), Fr. Petroniu (Tănase), Fr. Paisius
(Olaru).... N ot people with academic titles— these are not the
people o f G od; only the ones who truly live their faith remain
the people o f God, the people who sincerely and humbly re
flect on the subject o f salvation. The Church doesn’t embrace
studying as much as it does experience, which reflects the fact
that we do not desire an earthly kingdom, but a heavenly one.
O nly the one who humbles himself enters there: it doesn’t
matter if he’s a cowboy or an emperor. Only one who strives
toward true humility enters there.
3 See Antonie Plămădeală, Tradiţie şi libertate in spiritualitatea ortodoxă

[Tradition and freedom in Orthodox spirituality) (Bucharest: Axios Press,
>9 9 5 ). P-i88.
113
E T E R N IT Y IN TH E M O M E NT
“You are acquainted with cataphatic and apophatic theolo

gy.·' The cataphatic aspect is rational— embraced by the West.
The Church is seen by them as a highly geometrical garden,
in which you tire when walking through it. Orthodox apopha-
tism is like a forest: nothing is symmetrically aligned, every
thing refreshes you, and you are present with yourself. Walking
in a straight line, you can’t achieve this [spiritual awareness].
And this is why we must remain Orthodox, and accept that a
humble heart knows God!
“In a village near Slatina Monastery there lived a man,
Alexander, who had seven children. No one would give him
work; nowhere was work to be found. So I told him to come
and work at the monastery. In the evening he would leave, re
turning home to his children with his bag full. I would give
him a lot to take home.
“Every time I would give him something, he would say, ‘Fa
ther, may God help you, wherever you turn your face!’
“I didn’t pay any attention to what he was saying; 1 was
pleased to give. And behold, later they imprisoned me. It was
a dreadful prison! I was blindfolded and eventually bound in
chains. And there, in a cell, I started thinking about where east
was in this cell. I didn’t know which way to turn, to bow down,
to pray.... But, all o f a sudden, Alexander’s words came to my
mind: ‘May God help you, anywhere you turn your face!’ And
I burst into tears. So ... look what Alexander was prophesying
for me at Slatina Monastery.”
During the time Fr. Arsenie was at Slatina, a misunder
standing with Fr. Cleopa, who was the abbot, arose due to the
interference o f a local authority, who wanted to change the
4 Cataphatic (positive) theology is the expressing o f G od or the Divine

through positive concepts and terminology, such as “G od is love." Apophatic
(negative) theology, in contrast, is the setting aside o f all that can be thought
and spoken, in order to draw near to God, W ho is wholly beyond thought
and speech.— E d .
rule o f the monastery in an attempt to laicize the monasteries.

The bishop agreed with this plan, and Elder Cleopa, who had
great respect for his superiors, did not contradict the bishop.
Fr. Arsenie, on the other hand, did not concur. The exarch
even told the bishop: “ We could get the abbot to agree with
us, but we will not get beyond Fr. Arsenie.” As they were in
the altar one day, Elder Cleopa, Fr. Arsenie, Fr. Emilian, and
Fr. Paisius (Olaru) began discussing this matter. Fr. Arsenie re
lated: “It was a dispute between spiritual fathers.’ I said, ‘Fr.
Cleopa, why did you support this?’
“ Fr. Emilian intervened, ‘Love is longsuffering, is merciful,
is not provoked ...!’ (cf. I Cor. 15:4-5).
“ I said, ‘This is so, but love rejoices only in the truth’ (cf.
I Cor. 13:6)! [At this point in the conversation, Fr. Cleopa had
asked forgiveness o f Fr. Arsenie.) O f course I forgive you, Fa
ther! It is not a matter o f forgiveness, but a matter o f truth.’
Those who were present there were astonished [by my re
ply]....” Elder Cleopa and Fr. Arsenie decided to go together
to work out the problem with the bishop. The bishop held fast
to his position. Fr. Arsenie told him, “Your Grace, you will see
the truth at the hour o f death.” And the bishop reposed short
ly thereafter. The astonished fathers o f Slatina told Fr. Arsenie,
“H ow you spoke to him, Father!”5
In addition to the obedience o f igumen, Fr. Arsenie was
also one o f the spiritual fathers o f Slatina Monastery, confess
ing half o f the brotherhood, along with his closest lay spiritual
children. He strove to guide all o f them on the path o f salva
tion, gently and wisely.
One o f his spiritual children, the cobbler o f the monastery,
had the habit o f using the leftover pieces o f leather in the shop
to bind the books in his cell. He became so attached to his
project that he would save money to buy leather for the books.
5 Literally: “ W hat a mouth you had, Father!”— T ran s.

Fr. Arsenie saw his “zeal” in this task, which was not bringing
him any spiritual fruit, and wanted to cure him o f it. Without
telling him, Fr. Arsenie took three o f his bound volumes from
his cell. The cobbler became sorrowful, thinking the books had
been stolen. He went to see Fr. Arsenie and told him about his
sorrow. Fr. Arsenie told him: “And why didn’t you rejoice that
they were taken? The one who took them is the one speaking
to you. Look, you come and ask me for the book you need,
you read it, and then you bring it back."6 This is how he would
teach the monks detachment from material things, for greater
spiritual growth.
Many young men came to Slatina Monastery seeking
a nobler way o f life. After being tried in all the obediences
during their novitiate, they would then be given the oppor
tunity to use their talents. Constantin Dumitrescu, the future
Fr. Marcu o f Sihăstria, was one o f them. He came to Slatina
from Cernica Monastery, looking for Fr. Arsenie, who had
been his spiritual father at Aiud Prison. As one biographer
explains: “On entering the monastic life, Constantin realized
that he could not survive its spiritual trials and battles with
out an experienced spiritual father, tried in the struggles o f
doing good works. And to whom should he have gone if not
to the one who became a master o f unceasing prayer and o f
keeping watch over the mind, who constantly strove to do
good?”7 Fr. Marcus hope was realized as Fr. Arsenie helped
him in the spiritual struggle. Here is how he recounted Fr.
Arsenie’s prayerful assistance: “During Holy Week I was with
Fr. Iustinian (Stoica).... And because we didn’t eat anything,
but still had to work, I had terrible ulcer spasms. W hile suffer
ing the most acute pains, God allowed Fr. Arsenie to tell me
only this: ‘Endure a little longer! Endure a little longer!’ I am
6 Interview with Hierodeacon Iustinian (Stoica), Trinitas T V , Septem

ber 4, i o n .
7 Bălan, M ărturia un ui creştin, p. 51.
n6
sure he was asking the Mother o f God to strengthen me. That

evening I ate, and the pain gradually went away. And then I
experienced indescribable spiritual joys and peace.”8
The vigils at the monastery were very tiring, continuing
past midnight. Those who had obediences requiring physical
effort would greatly struggle to stay awake. Such was the case
with Br. Vasile, who tended the horses. Once, exhausted by his
daily labors, he fell asleep during Matins next to Fr. Arsenic,
who would sit behind the hierarchical throne, so he “could be
better hidden.” The nearby monks would come and wake Br.
Vasile, chastising him for snoring right next to the igumen. But
exhausted as he was, he would fall asleep again. Br. Vasile only
awoke during the singing o f the hymn, “To Thee the Champion
Leader,” which concluded the service. He began to sing with
the brethren, and Fr. Arsenie said, “Look, Br. Vasile earned ‘To
Thee the Champion Leader!’ ”9
One o f the deacons o f the monastery, who later became a
hierarch, would not participate in the vigils. When Fr. Arsenie
asked him why he was not joining them for the service, he re
plied that he would rather sleep in his cell, in his bed, than in
church. Fr. Arsenie told him, “It’s better to sleep in church!”
He used the example o f Br. Vasile, who would come to services
willingly, in spite o f his physical exhaustion, and greatly benefit
from his labor for God.
A novice, Br. Ion (now Hierodeacon Iustinian [Stoica]),
also had the obedience o f tending the horses. In Confession, he
would lament his inability to do his prayer rule due to his fa
tigue. Fr. Arsenie told him, “Br. Ion, when you lead the horses
and they drag you, lift your eyes up toward heaven and send a
8 Bălan, M ărturia unui creştin, pp. 50-51.

9 That is, through his labors during the day and in trying to remain
awake, but also through the mercy o f the M other o f G od, he received the
crown for the entire vigil.— T r a n s .
II 7
E T E R N IT Y IN TH E M O M E N T
Hierodcacon Iustinian (Stoica) with Fr. Arsenic at

Tcchirghiol Monastery in June 2008.
deep sigh to God— for Him this sigh is more than all the can
ons you want to do, but cannot.” 10
This was always Fr. Arsenie’s approach to prayer: “ Person
ally, I ’m not for fixed prayer rules." Though they do have their
particular benefit, especially for self-discipline, man shouldn’t
be inflexible, but he should be precise in terms of the method
he uses to grow spiritually. We don’t need a fixed prayer rule
immediately. We need our heart to be continually present;12
this permanent state o f love, o f a relationship with G od —
this is the essence o f prayer. Because deep silence also means
deep prayer. And deep prayer means deep silence.... I’m more
interested in unceasing spiritual trembling. Therefore ... every
10 Interview with Hierodcacon Iustinian (Stoica) on Trinitas T V , Sep

tember 4, i o n .
11 That is, a rule that includes a set number o f prayers, bows, and prostra
tions.— E d .
12 This term is used quite often by Fr. Arsenic, referring to a state of a
continuous awareness o f G od ’s presence, and to watchfulness.— T ran s.
ii 8
moment is a taste o f eternity and every sigh can be a prayer. You

don’t just sigh like this: ‘Humph!’ Your sigh to God should
spring toward Him from the depth o f your heart. Thus He re
veals Him self to us, for He does not reveal Himself to a clever
mind ... but only to the one pure in heart, to the one whose
heart turns toward Him unceasingly.” 13
Fr. Arsenie did not abolish the typikon or the external ex
pressions o f faith; he simply felt that a precondition for any
ascetic labor was for the heart to be immediately and continu
ally present in the activity. Later, while at Cernica Monastery,
he would secretly show his knees—worn out by countless pros
trations— to another father. He also wrote in a letter to a nun
that a multitude o f prayers or prostrations is not the most im
portant thing, “even though these will also be written down
somewhere,” but, rather, man’s permanent state o f awareness o f
being in G od’s presence.
His teachings were full o f examples inspired from his
personal life, from his observations o f all creation, perceived
through spiritual eyes. He turned many events that might seem
ordinary into parables, pointing to truths o f eternal value. For
example, once, while he was visiting some relatives, he wit
nessed the first steps o f his eight-month-old niece. He used
this incident to describe the unsteady, yet certain, steps o f ev
ery Christian on the path to repentance. He would compare a
mother’s excited, attentive, and joyous gaze with God’s care for
everyone who follows Him.
Sometimes he would be asked about the source o f his deep
knowledge, since he had not gone to university or completed
an advanced course in the subjects for which he possessed great
knowledge. His finest school was God’s creation, in all its facets,
which he would see as being “very good,” as the eyes o f his soul
13 http://www.razboincrucuvant.ro/10n/07/11/cum -sa-ne-rugam -ne-

invata-ca-mmeni-altul-parincele-arsenie-papacioc-avem-nevoie-de-o-prezen-
ta-concinua-a-inimii-asta-este-esenta-rugaciunii-si-video.
were pure and able to perceive living secrets and mysteries. His
wisdom was not simply gained in the library, but more through
suffering and struggle. And so, he chose to transmit his spiritual
knowledge through action and examples from the natural world.
The following account reflects his experiential approach.
There was an archeological site close to the monastery, where
a human skeleton had been unearthed in an excavation. Fr. Ar-
senie asked the archeologists to leave it uncovered, using it as
an opportunity to tell people about the vanity o f earthly life
and about the importance o f acquiring eternal life. “Death is a
reality. I repeat, death does not come for a cup o f coffee with
you; it comes to take you,” he would later say. “ Then that man
will see that the counsels o f the Holy Fathers on remembrance
o f death are not simple words.... When death approaches, you
become the greatest theologian. Then you realize you’ve lost an
entire life, becoming conscious that the time God gives us to
live is His greatest gift to us. This is the greatest gift. At death
you enter the unknown, not for a thousand years, but for eter
nity! Then you become aware and your whole being trembles.” 14
Later, he sketched a skull, symbolizing death. He would
copy it and give it to his spiritual children, saying; “D o you
want to see what death looks like? Behold, here it is!” He
would write a few words on the bottom o f the sketch for those
interested, such as: “Death, death, only through you can we be
come the sons o f the Resurrection,” or, “Behold ... we can only
meditate on death. Blessed are those who fight for Christian
love— the only freedom.”
He would go to Iaşi on October 14 for the feast day o f St.
Paraskeva, whom he greatly revered, spending the days o f the
celebration at the head o f her relics and anointing the many
faithful who came to venerate her. Once a desperate woman
came, holding her dead child in her arms. The child must
14 http://strajeriiortodoxiei.blogspot.ro/iio/o7/ne-vorbeste-parintele-
arsenie-papacioc.htmI.
IZ O
Sketch o f a skull by Fr. Arsenie. He would distribute photocopies o f
this drawing to his spiritual children with notes, such as the one writ
ten above: “Behold ... we can only meditate on death. Blessed are
those who die fighting for Christian love— the only freedom.”
E TE R N ITY IN THE M O M E NT
have just reposed, and the woman, in her desperation, thought

about St. Paraskeva. Fr. Arsenie took the child in his arms and
blessed him over the holy relics. Immediately, the child began
to move his hands and feet.
This was a joyful moment, but he also experienced times
o f sorrow, which remained painful memories for him as spiri
tual father. “In Confession I had two grave cases. A man did
not want to confess a very serious sin. He would not confess it
even after much insistence, and obviously, I could not give him
absolution. He died a few days later without confessing his sin.
God brought him in time to receive forgiveness, as He brings
all o f us, and he could have been saved through a word. This
frightened and enlightened many people, especially those who
knew o f the sin, those who had committed it together with
him.
“Another terrifying case was that o f an ill man who was at
the monastery for Holy Unction for three days. His wife had
told us about some grievous sins he had committed, and we
begged him for three days to have Confession with whomever
he wanted— for there were many priests among us— all the
while kindly showing him that the good God forgives all sins
through Confession. But in no way did he wish to confess.
When we were serving Holy Unction on the night o f the third
day, all o f a sudden he began to cry out that some dreadful
creatures were coming to get him. He could see them and all
his sins with the eyes o f his soul, and, terrified beyond tell
ing, he asked to confess quickly. Now he became wise! All the
people in the room departed swiftly, and he, in piercing wails,
was only able to say: T did it ... I did it,’ and he died in my
arms. I gave him absolution out o f a feeling o f responsibility
and mercy, at least for his last wish, but he was dead. That
story was recounted in the entire region for many years after.” 15
15 N c vorbeşte Părintele Arsenie, vol. 1, pp. 79 -80.
ill
The spiritual life at Slatina Monastery was flourishing, and

this greatly troubled the Communist administration. The Secu-
ritate pressured the monastery council to limit the number o f
pilgrims coming to the monastery, especially the youth— most
o f them intellectuals— attracted by the authentic life there and
desiring to join the monastery. The Communists’ fear was al
ways the same: those who entered monasteries did so in order
to ally themselves against the regime. They were bothered by
the fact that the monasteries were, by nature, spaces with their
own rule, with restrictions on the outside world’s access to the
monks. At Slatina no one was allowed to enter the building
housing the monks’ cells. Thus, in order to collect relevant in
formation, the agents sent by the Sccuritate had to have strong
connections with the monastics there.
Periodically, Fr. Arsenie would travel to Bucharest and stay
at Antim Monastery. Once the monks told him about a learned
monk, Marcu, whom the abbot wanted to ordain to the holy
priesthood but who was unable to confess certain thoughts. Fr.
Arsenic asked him if he could stay in his cell during that visit,
as its seclusion would enable him to pray in silence. The monk
received him joyfully; it was a privilege any monk would have
loved. As they were talking in the cell, Fr. Arsenie said, “Broth
er, despite all my time in the wilderness and the prisons, I’m
still fighting with thoughts. How are you doing?” Plucking up
courage, M onk Marcu replied, “Me coo, Father,” and he began
to confess the thoughts impeding his ordination to the priest
hood. Thus, skillfully, Fr. Arsenie acquired him for the great
work he was called to do.
During these trips to Bucharest, Fr. Arsenie participated,
together with Elder Cleopa, at some spiritual gatherings in the
homes o f Alexandru Mironescu16 and Constantin Joja, mem
bers o f the Burning Bush movement. Their presence at these
16 Alexandru Mironescu (19 0 }—1973) was a Romanian writer, philoso
pher, chemist, and university lecturer.— E d .
12-3
Alexandru Mironescu and Fr. Daniil (Tudor) at Rarău Hermitage.
meetings was irregular and not necessarily planned. For exam

ple, they went to the home o f Constantin Joja for professional
advice on a renovation project at the monastery. Nevertheless,
under the pretext o f Fr. Arsenie’s presence at these gatherings,
the Securitate did not lose the opportunity to harass him for
his Legionnaire past, eventually arresting him on June 14, 1958,
at Slatina Monastery.
114
C H A P T E R N IN E
A M O N K A B O V E A L L E LSE
his arrest, Fr. Arsenie chose to serve ev
T
h e w eek befo re
ery day, something he would not usually do as igumen.

The other priests o f the monastery would normally rotate serv
ing in church on a weekly basis. The night o f his arrest, June
14, 1958, was rainy and cold. The fathers were in church, and
Matins was nearing completion. At the end o f the service the
sacristan opened the big door o f the church, and suddenly the
beams o f flashlights pierced the darkness o f the church, blind
ing the eyes o f the monks. “Anghel Papacioc, where is he?” Fr.
Arsenie replied, “ I ’m here, sir!”
“ They arrested me at Slatina Monastery at two o’clock in
the morning, when I was coming out o f church— I was ac
tually serving. A t two o’clock in the morning: three trucks,
eighty-nine officers, and two small cars.” They surrounded Fr.
Arsenie and all the brethren, taking each one to his cell. The
officers began the search, which lasted until 10 a.m., confiscat
ing a few sacks o f notebooks they considered to be important
documents. A n armed officer followed him even to the bath
room. June 14 was the only day in the history o f the monas
tery when the Divine Liturgy was not served, as the Securitate
agents had locked the church, taking the keys.
The next morning Fr. Arsenie told them, ‘“ The mountain
quaked, and out came a mouse!’ 1 Why all the theatrics?! If you
had called me on the telephone, I would have come on my
own.” The officers probably realized the ridiculous scene they
1“ Parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus,” from Horace's Ars Poetica.
125
Fr. Arsenic at the time o f his arrest and imprisonment in 1958.
had caused. “Father was not a political leader, or an agent o f

some foreign secret service or special forces; he was unarmed
and not even a violent man. On the contrary, he had always
been a model o f spiritual balance and a preacher o f the ulti
mate struggle o f Christian sacrifice. Father was simply a good
Christian, a good monk, ready at all times to give his life for
Christ and the well-being o f his nation.”2
While taking the arrested monks to the truck, the officers
began to mock Fr. Arsenie when they saw the entire brother
hood and the visiting pilgrims kissing his hand. “ Don't worry,
you’ll also kiss my hand!” he told them. “Obviously, I was en
dangering myself, but they had to keep me in one piece. I ’ve
always remembered this.”3 Fr. Petroniu (Tănase), his monastic
sponsor, who knew Fr. Arsenie very well and understood the
2 Diaconcsti Monastery Sisterhood, “ Mărturii ale informatorilor

Securităţii, în majoritatea lor trecuţi prin reeducare” [Confessions o f Secu
ritate Informants— most o f them underwent reeducation], Fam ilia ortodoxă
[Orthodox family], no. 8 (31), August 2011, pp. 12 -13.
3 After the Revolution in 1989, many ex-Communists and Securitate of
ficers repented o f their deeds and kissed his hand.— E d .
126
A M O NK ABOVE ALL ELSE
virtue o f his self-sacrifice, said, “If he survives this trial, he’ll

do great works in the Church.” Ft. Arsenie discreetly turned
around, and blessed them all without being noticed. W ith a
heavy heart he was leaving his spiritual children and the broth
erhood he had gathered, along with the other great fathers. It
had taken the senior fathers years o f self-sacrifice to spiritually
form the brotherhood. Not long after these events, the Commu
nists dispersed the brotherhood—I w ill smite the shepherd, and
the sheep o f the flock shall be scattered abroad (Matt. 16 :31)— en
forcing the dreadful Decree 410.45
The arrested monks were taken blindfolded to Suceava.
Br. Constantin (the future Fr. Marcu Dumitrescu) was also
among them. At first, they accused Fr. Arsenie o f collaborat
ing with the mountain partisans, but were unable to find any
proof, just as they would find no evidence o f propaganda in his
notebooks, which only had religious notes. “They were accus
ing me o f writing many things.... Since they had my books and
my notebooks, I said, ‘Sir, listen to me: I don’t admit to any
thing that you accuse me o f (because I could sense what this
was about) if my signature is not there [on the statement]— for
you could very well accuse me by inserting a whole series o f
your own words in my letters, in order to condemn me. I don’t
acknowledge anything that doesn’t have my signature.’ I started
signing what was mine: notes, books, and notebooks, so they
wouldn’t stick something alien in there. It seemed to me they
were honest. They were very convinced that I had spread pro
paganda. N ot in the least, Fathers!4 1 used to be a Legionnaire,
but [now], Fathers, I ’m a monk, above any kind o f measure,
above anything. A n d we have no ideal other than that God grant
4 Decree 410, issued by the Communist government in November 1959,

established that monks had to be at least fifty-five years old and nuns at least
fifty. Because o f this, about five thousand monastics were removed from their
monasteries, and about ninety monasteries were closed.— E d .
5 H e was speaking to a group o f monks when relating these events.— E d .
E TE R N ITY IN THE M O M E N T
Iconographie por
trait o f Fr. Marcu
Dumitrcscu.
us the jo y o f dying torn into pieces and tortured fo r the spark o f

Truth we know abides in us, fo r the defense o f which we w ill en
ter into a life-and-death battle with the dom inating powers o f
darkness. This is my motto! Anyway, they blindfolded me and
put me in a room with walls about fifteen feet high— ‘so big’
that you could barely move. There was also a chair which was
actually more in the way ... I was only wearing my ryassa, and I
slept on the cement floor, as I couldn’t sleep on the chair. Dur
ing the night I heard a soft knock on the wall. W ho do you
think it was? It was Fr. Marcu, who had also been arrested....
When I heard him— ! He was in a three-foot by three-foot cell
like me. Fathers, you can’t imagine, psychologically speaking,
what it means, in the midst o f suffering, to see someone who
is one o f your own. Well, I greatly rejoiced hearing Fr. Marcu

next door.”
The following day they took them blindfolded to Bucha
rest, where the interrogation began at Uranus Prison. Fr. Ar-
senie never related all the details regarding this interrogation,
but Fr. Marcu summarized the experience: “It was pure death.
It was unbearable. Only part o f what we endured has been re
corded, as it was impossible to document everything we went
through, for different reasons.”6
The interrogation was not an interview with simple ques
tions and answers— something we would be tempted to be
lieve, seeing the interrogation reports that have been preserved.
In reality, the interrogation consisted o f savage beatings, terri
ble tortures that would make you confess everything, even “the
paps you have sucked,” as the torturers would say. And many
gave in, but not Fr. Arsenic, nor Fr. Marcu, nor the others who
put their trust in God, Who can do all things, thus also, Who
can sustain those who truly love Him. Fr. Arsenie would re
count, “ It was harder for me, as I was more renowned and they
wanted to make me denounce others, too, so they could be
tried and imprisoned also. But I did not do such things— God
forbid!” His torturers would have rejoiced to see him cry or say
anything, but he never uttered a word.
“They would lead me by pulling my beard, but I was joyful.
They would take us to be seen by the ordinary prisoners, as we
were political prisoners.” This was done in order to complete
their suffering, for, in the words o f Fr. Arsenie, “Suffering is not
complete if it is not accompanied by humiliation.”
“Just as it would also happen to me later in prison, they
6 One reason was their humility, as they desired to offer this sacrifice to
Christ entirely, and receive front H im their reward in due time. This might be
the reason for Fr. Arsenic’s decision to never share the sufferings endured in
prison in their entirety. H is saying, “ H ow terrible was the interrogation!" con
cealed those sufferings, unfathomable for those who did not face them.— E d .
cook us [for interrogation], wearing glasses with metal lenses.

There was glass covering the metal plates to simulate regular
glasses, but the one wearing them couldn’t sec anything, and
he would be escorted arm-in-arm by the guard. Once it hap
pened that 1 got a pair o f glasses missing the metal lens for the
right eye. Initially, I was very scared, thinking about the conse
quences o f such a defect, but I didn’t say a thing and walked as
though I couldn’t see, with my head slightly bent down. About
ten steps in front o f me, they were taking another prisoner to
the same kind o f interrogation. When I saw the other one, I re
joiced that I was not alone, and was greatly encouraged, as if I
had seen a human being for the first time in my life. I rejoiced
as though I had seen an angel.
“Then I remembered a story about St. Macarius the Great:
The skull o f a pagan priest told him that the greatest torment
in hell is the inability o f anyone to sec the face o f anyone else;
they only see the backs o f others— that is to say, loneliness in
the midst o f company. However, the skull added, ‘ When you
pray for us, we’re able to see the faces o f others for a time.’
Imagine! I'Ve have the Proskomedial... You pray /or a ll your kin,
fo r a ll the city, fo r a ll the people on the earth.
“Fr. Marcu and I first became acquainted in battle.7 We be
came friends because we were, with great joy, part of a sacrifice,
an offering, a battle that demanded our blood at all costs. He
was about two or three years older than I was, but age no lon
ger matters in battle— deeds, heroism, mind-set: these are what
matter.
“He was extremely patient in sufferings. He was called ‘the
fakir,’ a name given to him during the reign o f Carol II by the
Secret Service o f that time, because he endured suffering with
incredible patience, without cries; he would remain silent if
they pulled out his fingernails. We constantly encouraged each
7 Fr. Arsenic is referring to the years when the Legionnaires were perse
cuted by K ing Carol II ’s regime, which lasted from 19 3 0 to 19 4 0 .— T ran s.
130
A M ONK ABOVE ALL ELSE
other but only met very rarely in prison, because we were iso
lated. I was at Zarca as was he, so we could communicate a
little through the walls, using Morse code. I had the greatest
admiration for Fr. Marcu as a man o f sacrifice.... He would in
disputably sacrifice himself for the great ideals o f man, o f our
nation. Although Fr. Marcu had been arrested for his Legion
naire past, I was convicted for being a member o f the Burning
Bush movement.”
The interrogation was supposed to last sixty days, but
when they saw that they could not extract anything from Fr.
Arsenie, they prolonged it for another thirty days. Ninety days
o f indescribable tortures. First, a captain, who dreadfully beat
him, interrogated him. “ He would hit me on the face, and I
would try to avoid the blow to keep him from damaging my
ear drum.”
“On another occasion, a miserable captain happened to
be my investigator. 1 had known him before I had gone to the
monastery, and he revealed his identity to me without real
izing it.” Fr. Arsenie had met him seventeen years earlier at a
cabin on Mount Piatra Craiului, where the future captain had
gone to spend his vacation with his wife and only daughter.
The family became very fond o f him, loving his personality. He
shared with them his desire to become a monk, yet they were
unable to comprehend it. “Before 1 went to the monastery, he
would stop me and say: ‘ You— going to the monastery!? Find
some other business; you’re an angel anyway!’
“Now, at the investigation, he said among other things:
‘You were like an angel!’— and that was enough for me to rec
ognize him. Nevertheless, I kept silent, for he would have killed
me if he had realized he had been recognized. It wouldn’t have
been difficult for him to accomplish this, as people were dying
there like mice.
“He cut my beard o ff during the investigation.
“I said, ‘You’ll answer to God for this, too!’
“And he cold me something that greatly profited me,

‘Enough. Monasticism doesn’t rest in the beard!’
“ ‘That wasn’t you speaking— the Holy Spirit just spoke
through you!’
“They were people who had sold themselves, people in the
service o f evil. They had a wage; they were masters. He slapped
me then, he hit me. But I thank God; all these sufferings had
their purpose. Nothing helped me in life more than suffering.
The highest level o f theology belongs solely to suffering. I am
certain the angels are envious o f us because they do not have
this suffering beyond one’s nature.
“You felt pain as you looked at your treacherous fellow
men, seeing that they had no fear o f God. And I was mind
ful o f their perdition, since I was no longer thinking about my
own life. You couldn’t believe you were still alive, because of
how they started to hit, beat, and accuse you. And then you
would accept death by any means; you no longer suffered due
to the chains.... You were grieved by the fact that it was your
neighbors who were doing these things. I, who in a way had
experienced the battle with the devil, said, 'These are w ore dan
gerous, fo r they don't fe a r G o d ... the devil h as fe a r o j God!' And
I had to endure the fact that my enemies were my fellow men.
If you’re a man o f God, He’s aware o f everything, and the more
you commend yourself to His will, the more He protects you.
However, even more importantly, you must love God and your
neighbor without fail. And you can’t say that your neighbor is
your enemy. These spiritual concepts would flash through my
heart and mind like lightning. Without a doubt, these were
things that kept you present at every moment.
“However, all this is impossible without sacrifice; it’s not
possible without a cross. This happened to me, this I recom
mend, and I long to live this way at all costs. lh e cross m eans to
bear what you don't like! The big mistake o f people in the world
is that they don’t accept suffering and don’t understand chat it’s
the only action, the only concern, the only living experience
that’s in opposition to everything that’s evil, that delivers them
from being under the reign o f the devil. He who runs away
from persecution runs away from God, says St. Theodore the
Studite. The Church needs persecutions, because they awaken
you, they keep you present, and it’s a battle.
“ You couldn’t reach concord with the persecutors— you
just had to confront them. The confrontation was such: ‘I’m
not allied with you in your attempt to make a rag and a demon
out o f me!’
“ The interrogation was the most dreadful period. They
would beat you to make you confess what they wanted you
to say. ‘I ’m not saying it, sir, I ’m not saying it! Cut my head
off, but I won’t say it! I’m not guilty o f this matter, I don’t
know about so-and-so: 1 don’t know about such-and-such!’ O f
course, I did defend certain things.”
Another member o f the Burning Bush remembered, “If
you maintained your position, the interrogation’s tone would
switch in a second from an amiable, friendly, benevolent one—
being told, ‘Be a smart boy, man! Wouldn’t it be a shame not
to confess and escape easily? Why are you being stubborn?
Don’t you want to escape?’— to cursing, threats, and beatings,
which could take the most brutal forms.”8
Fr. Arsenic continued: “And finally they found me guilty o f
my Legionnaire past and o f participating in the ‘Burning Bush’ at
Antim Monastery, where meetings with people o f exalted spiri
tual life took place on Saturday nights. They [the Securitate] con
sidered that we were spreading propaganda there and organizing
ourselves against them. But we were having spiritual gatherings.”
The fact that they found him guilty did not mean that
the interrogations ceased. On the contrary, the interrogations
8 Carmen Ciornea, C hipul 'R ugului A prins' dăltuit in m em oria vie a uce
nicilor [The image o f the “ Burning Bush” engraved in the vivid memory o f the
disciples], voi. i (Iaşi: Vasiliana ’98 Press, 10 14 ), p. 95.
153
continued in the same rhythm, lasting for three, six, even seven
hours at a time. After spending so much time with Fr. Arsenic, the
captain, although on the opposite side, began to appreciate the el
der’s wisdom. He may have been moved by Fr. Arsenie’s ability to
dodge the captains traps designed to make him betray others. At
the end, he commanded Fr. Arsenie, “Tell me a profitable w ord!”
Fr. Arsenie related: “Knowing that he had a faithful wife
and a daughter, I starting speaking: ‘In one family the husband
was unbelieving, but the wife was faithful. Their daughter got
sick. At that time the daughter asked her father: “In which
faith shall I die, in yours or in my mothers?” The father an
swered her: “Repose in your mother’s faith, for mine doesn’t
give you anything!”’ I was referring to him when I spoke, as
he greatly cared for his daughter: she was the apple o f his eye.
When I met them she was little (about ten); now she was older
or might have been gone.” The captain left after hearing the
parable and never returned to interrogate Fr. Arsenie. A lieu
tenant took his place. Thus, by divine providence, Fr. Arsenie
escaped the torture o f this cruel man.
Until the completion o f the investigation and the declara
tion o f his sentence, Fr. Arsenie was transferred to Jilava Prison,
which was a place o f transition.
“Very early in the morning, I believe before 3 a.m., we were
transferred to Jilava in a van.... Our hair was cut, we put on inmate
uniforms— some worn-out, dirty clothing, probably recovered
from those dead or released— and each one of us was thrown into
a separate cell. Jilava remains a dreadful prison. The old under
ground fort was sinister, frightful, and hard to forget. Crowded,
ten-foot-high metal bunk beds, nonexistent medical assistance...
the food was very poor and there was a dreadful famine.”9
The trial o f those associated with the Burning Bush took place
on October 2,9. This group included Hieroschemamonk Daniil
9 Ibid., p p . 9 9 ,1 0 1 .
134
Fr. Dumitru Staniloae.
(Sandu Tudor), Fr. Benedict (Ghiu$), Fr. Adrian (Fageteanu),

Fr. Roman (Braga),101 Fr. Sofian (Boghiu), the iconographer Fe
lix Dubneac, Prof. Alexandru Mironescu and his son, Serban,
doctors Vasile Voiculcscu11 and Gheorghe Dabija, Fr. Dumitru
Staniloae,12 and the students Vasai Gheorghe, Nicolae Radulescu,
10 Archimandrite Roman (Braga) ( 19 11- 10 15 ) was imprisoned twice,

for a total o f ten years. Later he was a missionary in Brazil, and in 19 7 1 he
settled in the United States. There he served in a number o f parishes and mon
asteries, and spent the last three decades o f his life in Monastery o f the Dormi-
tion o f the M other o f God, Rives Junction, Michigan.— E d .
11 Vasile Voiculescu (1884-1963) was a prominent Romanian poet,
short-story writer, playwright, and physician.— E d .
12 Fr. Dum itru Staniloae (1903-1993) was the greatest Romanian theo
logian o f the twentieth century. Among his many works was a translation o f
the P hilokalia into Romanian in twelve volumes with an accompanying com
mentary that clarified many obscure passages. He was also a confessor o f the
Faith, w ho was imprisoned from 1958 to 1963.— E d .
Emanoil Mihailescu, and Dan Pistol. The court appointed the

lawyers for the trial. The hearings were a mockery o f justice: some
o f the lawyers forgot their function and from defenders became
prosecutors o f their own clients. Those lawyers who actually de
sired to defend their clients could not develop a case because they
were only allowed to meet with them for a few minutes. Thus,
the accused requested to submit some evidence that would have
proved their innocence, but it was rejected as “inconclusive and
irrelevant.” “The trial lasted two days and was closed-door,” 13 re
lated one o f the members of the group. Fr. Arsenie recalled, “ They
judged us at night, with no defense.”
Consequently, on November 8 Fr. Arsenie was sentenced
for participating at the meetings o f the Burning Bush move
ment; for having religious conversations at Slatina Monastery
with some o f the youth accused in the case, counselling them
to live a religious life; for listening to imperialist radio stations
(Radio Free Europe, Voice o f America); for hostile comments
against the Communist regime; and for his Legionnaire back
ground. The judge drew an erroneous conclusion: Fr. Arsenie
“ became a monk in order to continue his Legionnaire activity.”
This statement had no foundation. Fr. Arsenie had strongly as
serted, even during the investigation, that from the moment he
joined the monastery he was simply a monk. “I am a monk
above all else.” He was condemned to twenty years o f forced
labor for the crime o f agitation against the social order and
twenty years o f imprisonment for the crime o f intense activity
against the laboring class, and also for “revolutionary activity.”
“They condemned me to forty years, so they could be sure
I would lie there in prison forever.... Forty years ... it was fun
ny, but it was taxing.”
After his sentence was pronounced, Fr. Arsenie was taken
back to Jilava Prison, where he was to enter the prison system.
13 Ciom ea, C hipu l “R ugu lui A prins^p. 98.
136
The captain, who was responsible for taking his civilian cloth
ing and shaving Fr. Arsenie, asked him, “ What did you do to
get such a sentence?”
“ I didn’t do anything,” Fr. Arsenie replied.
“If you hadn’t done anything they would have given you
ten to fifteen years, but not forty!”
Here is the essence o f Communist justice: ten to fifteen
years, for nothing. Now his journey to the dreadful prison o f
Aiud began for the second time.
C H A PTER TEN
A L I V E IN D E A T H
URING MY FIRST months in prison,” Fr. Arsenic related,
D “I was very sorrowful at leaving behind a world that

might have needed me. Later, I turned my attention to inside
the prison, and I saw that there were a great many people with
the same needs there, with the same life as those outside. God
confirmed this truth through the mouth o f a ‘devil.’ During an
investigation there, at Aiud, the Securitate agent questioning me
left me with another officer not involved in the matter o f the
interrogation— a captain most likely from the administration.
He asked me what my occupation on the outside had been. I
told him that I was a monk. ‘Yes,’ he replied, ‘you left a mon
astery and came to another monastery.’ Whether he was joking
or not, I don’t know, but I found in these words the simple and
short conclusion I had come to after such a long time. D o you
see how the will and the word o f the Lord could be revealed
through anyone, even through a son o f the evil one?”
The prison was indeed a monastery for Fr. Arsenie. Here he
served, confessed, prayed, and cared for his spiritual children
from whom he was separated by solid walls, encouraging and
strengthening them in the arduous battle o f preserving their
souls undefiled, sending them blessings and continually com
memorating them in his prayers.
Upon his arrival at Aiud, the prison was going through
a series o f changes designed to set in motion an operation
to morally “kill” the political prisoners— “the most tenacious
enemies o f Communism.” Known as “Aiud reeducation,” the
138
ALIVE IN DEATH
operation had one essential objective: the renunciation o f God,

carried out in such a manner that if the prisoners were released,
they would no longer be a danger to the Communists.
The first change was the installation o f a new chief o f the
prison, a Securitate colonel named Gheorghe Crăciun— a con
vinced atheist who became the perfect tool in the implementa
tion o f this diabolic plan. The reeducation system was intended
to be an extensive operation that would destroy the dignity o f
as many people as possible. Consequently, the intricate prepa
rations lasted for four years, with no prisoner knowing what
was being planned for them. In his discussions with other pris
oners Fr. Arsenie would say, “the harsh measures o f late prove
that the war is imminent, thus the hour o f release from prison
is drawing near.” He was right; the release would come, but
first came the war— a terrible one.
Colonel Crăciun instituted a very austere regime. The
prisoners were under intense surveillance, being monitored
through peepholes every ten minutes and cruelly punished for
the smallest misbehavior. “ The prisoner was not allowed to do
anything from the time he woke at 5 a.m. until 10 p.m. when
the lights were out. He would not be allowed to lay in bed, to
talk (except to whisper), to approach the window, to recount
anything, to do any kind o f labor, manual or intellectual, which
would have made time go by more easily. The ‘bandit’ had to
painfully experience the passing o f time.” 1
In addition to facing outside surveillance, they had to en
dure informers inside their cells— special agents very hard to
identify— who would lure the prisoners into revealing their
thoughts and feelings so that they could report these con
versations, often times distorting them through their biased
perspective. There were other kinds o f informers— prisoners
who sided with the enemy, playing the game o f the prison’s
1 Demostene Andronescu, Reeducarea de la A iu d [Reeducation at Aiud]
(Bucharest: Editura Christiana), 2.009, P· 45 -
139
Contemporary photograph ot Aiud Prison.
administration. Fr. Arsenic would recount years later: “ They

sought to place agents who worked on us by means of different
methods. It was a big battle— a life-and-death one. You had to
accept death in order to survive the attacks designed to morally
degrade you.... You had to be prepared for death. The authori
ties would even place specially trained agents in your cell. They
would insert them as prisoners, but they were actually paid, be
cause many prisoners gave in and these were the most danger
ous agents.”
From the outset Fr. Arsenie, who was classified as a danger
ous prisoner, “resided” at Zarca, one o f the three sections o f the
prison. He would later relate: “Aiud had another section called
Zarca. It was no joke; it was a regime o f extermination. They
would bring in agents to observe our feelings. It was an admin
istration o f death. The thing they insisted on, with cruelty, was
starvation. I f they opened your cell to take you out, you didn’t
know whether you would return.... They would take us outside
140
ALIVE IN DEATH
for ten minutes every three months. But we couldn’t bear it,
because the air was very brisk outside, and we were shaking
wrecks.”
The regime at Zarca was unbearable for many; their hearts
would literally stop. A prisoner who spent time in Zarca re
lated: “ For seventeen out o f the twenty-four hours we were not
allowed to touch the walls, to lean against the door jamb, to
sit on the edge o f the latrine—which had no lid and smelled
terribly, being unwashed— or even to lay on the cement. We
received a meal every three days, consisting o f nine ounces o f
bread and a lukewarm broth, sometimes even cold, o f unrec
ognizable ingredients. In the isolation cell, a bed with a ply
wood board would be dropped from the wall from io p.m. to
5 a.m., and a scrap o f a blanket with holes would be thrown at
us, which had to suffice as mattress and cover.”2
The goal o f removing the “most troublesome elements” was
to slowly liquidate them through isolation, starvation, cold,
lack o f medical assistance, etc. Consequently, there was no in
criminating evidence against the administration o f the prison
for these crimes. Fr. Arsenie was able to resist at Zarca. “I had
a strong heart, I was healthy. I had been in prison and lived in
the wilderness, but I had a good heart and I survived.”
The guards were merciless. Fr. Arsenie later related:“Life
in prison is very difficult. You must have faith and know that
God is with you and know what you are suffering for. The en
emy fears our God, W ho is his God also; but the prison guards
were not afraid o f anything: they had no God.”
Kindheartedness was a rarity among the guards, but not
completely unknown. “ When they arrested me they took my
garments, and my cross and schema from my neck. Their loops
2 M ihai Demetriade, Descompimere fi reabilitare. Elem ente cadru p riv-

in dactivitatca G ru pidu i O perativ A iu d, Caictelc C N SA S [Decomposition and
rehabilitation: The background o f Aiud operative group’s activity, C N S A S
Notebooks], no. i (4), (Bucharest: C N S A S Press, 2.0:0) p. 16 4 .
got entangled and they became twisted together. A ll the pris

oners’ belongings would normally be thrown out. But when
the guard took my cross and schema, he carefully put them to
the side, without being noticed.”
Once Fr. Arsenie was in his cell and, being very thirsty, he
begged for a cup o f water, but the guard completely ignored
him. When the shift changed, a female guard brought him a
cup o f water with great secrecy and caution. For the rest o f his
life, he commemorated her for this act o f kindness. “They were
afraid to show any kindness toward us because if they were
caught being kind to the prisoners they would have been killed
or incarcerated with us. One o f the guards, Biro, was very
mean. He didn’t know much. One day he had nothing better
to do and told me, ‘They’ll make you patriarch!’
‘“Aren’t you wondering what I’m going to do with all of
you if they make me patriarch?’ I replied."
Tlie slightest misbehavior was punished with solitary con
finement for three, five, seven, even eleven days. The isolation
cell, also called “the refrigerator” or “the black cell,” was one of
Colonel Craciun’s ideas. He had set up an entire section with
these cells, which were very tall and completely empty (except
for a small toilet with no lid). These refrigerator-cells were
made entirely o f cement and had a window very close to the
ceiling, which always remained open. The dreadful draft com
bined with the constant cold could easily be fatal, as the pris
oner only wore the standard inmate uniform.
The detainee received food— a cup o f mush— once every
three days, at times only once in five days. Sentences to soli
tary confinement were given mostly during the winter, when it
was unbearable to be in those cells. Even the guards bringing
the prisoners would be horrified by the darkness and freezing
cold there, saying, “It’s like hell in here! Indeed, here it’s like
hell.” They would be astonished that those people could live
there. “ Combining the cold with starvation and exhaustion (as
141
ALIVE IN DEATH
you had to constantly move so you would not freeze to death),

the torturers would procure exceptional’ results. After a few
sessions o f such ‘therapy,’ even the most determined ‘ bandits’
were trained or disciplined.... In such conditions you had to re
sist the temptation to lie down and fall asleep in order not to
freeze.”3 Lying on the floor was certain death.
Another method o f torture was starvation. “At Aiud they
would administer a regime o f extermination through starva
tion; it was easier to hide it. They would give us some broth—
we didn’t even know what it was made from. Once I happened
to see some bean skins in it and I said, ‘This was a bean!’ But
the fact that we would get this broth at set hours, every day,
every year, helped us survive. This is what I noticed. We sur
vived through God’s help. How much suffering helps us! We
were cured o f ulcers and other illnesses with that fasting in
prison. Doctors recommend fasting for healing: it is a proven
fact.” The hunger the prisoners experienced was inconceivable.
They were all skeletons. The guards would sneer at them, “Hey,
you’re not people—you’re shadows!” Years later, while at Cheia
Monastery, Fr. Arsenic would recount: “My dear, only God
kept me alive. I went through difficult moments, great misery
and starvation. I would be so hungry that while awake I would
often dream o f mountains o f bread.” Although Fr. Arsenie
would be starving he never hesitated sharing his rations with
his co-sufferers in isolation.
Due to lack o f nutrition many lost their teeth, their memo
ry, their senses, and their overall health. “Many things in prison
left an impression on me, but there were two things that espe
cially affected me. There was a man who pulled his teeth out
with his hand because he was lacking calcium. And the other:
A poor cellmate, who had forgotten his wife’s name. ‘What
could her name be?’ I was looking at him and was deeply
3 Paraian, A m in tiri despre duhovnicii, p. 46.
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E TE R N ITY IN TH E M O M E N T
moved, and tears came to my eyes. The prisoners would pull

their teeth out and throw them on the floor, because they were
lacking calcium. We were skeletons.
“I thank God I had good teeth ... and I had a good memo
ry. In prison I had to be constantly watchful, as I would confess
others in the cell. When I went to prison I had perfect vision,
but when I came out I had [myopia]— three diopters on both
eyes. There, the only way to gauge your eyesight was to look at
your hands. I’d look at my hands and I couldn’t see them very
well— I thought I had something in my eyes. I didn’t get arthri
tis; I was constantly praying, ‘Hands, feet, don’t get arthritis!’
“There was one prisoner who could not have a bowel move
ment; his large intestine’s muscles had atrophied— very pain
ful. When they took us outside for our monthly ten minute
allotment, this sick man approached the barbed wire fence and
began to climb it. Although all the prisoners and the guards
on ground level shouted to the guard [in the tower] who was
keeping watch on the courtyard o f the prison not to shoot, he
shot the poor man on the spot. And they decorated the one
who shot him. Who decorated him? Crăciun, who was the
chief.” The prisoners who had helplessly witnessed the cruel
scene began to shout and make accusations; the whole prison
was in such an uproar that they were barely calmed down.
“They could have killed us all,” Fr. Arsenie later recalled.
The prisoners became united in order to protect themselves
against the harsh measures o f the prison administration. The in
mates would spy on the guards from within the cell, just as the
guards would watch them from outside. While a prisoner kept
watch, the others would rest, talk, teach each other, communi
cate with other cells through Morse code, and pray. The priests,
like Fr. Arsenie, would even serve Divine Liturgy in those con
ditions. Behold, the Communist effort to annihilate religious
life— through the imprisonment o f the clergy and the closing o f
monasteries— did not bear fruit; the prisons were transformed
144
ALIVE IN DEATH
into true monasteries and the inmates who had not been espe
cially religious came to live as monastics and ascetics.
Fr. Arsenie said to one o f his cellmates, “ We have to put
our hope in God and dedicate our lives to Christ. Here we
must battle and affirm our position and mind-set because one
cannot know how God establishes the path to turn everything
into good in the end. You’ve seen how the Church in our coun
try has prospered and achieved great things during the Com
munist regime— things that not only didn’t occur during the
so-called times o f freedom, but also were impossible to attain.
Misfortune had to come for order and discipline to be brought
about in the Church and for the careless people o f yesterday to
rise today in like-mindedness and a desire for the spiritual life,
at a new level o f experience. It’s true, atheists have appeared
outside [the prison] and they have some support, but their stri
dent emergence has only strengthened others. Consequently
the Church has gained the victory through them. And don’t
believe that these atheists arc as they seem— for most o f them
it is just a mask. I had many occasions to see this. Members of
the Communist Party and even Securitate agents would quite
often come secretly to the monastery so I could confess them,
marry them, baptize their children. And I can say that many
times I observed my interrogators let slip a comment or reveal
an opinion which convinced me they were not at all atheists—
something they clearly exposed on many occasions.
“ The situation outside is not as difficult as the majority o f
the prisoners seem to think. It is much better than it has been
until now. This is the truth, although it seems strange. Therefore,
tomorrow— and it’s true that this tomorrow may be later for
us— it’ll be no surprise when these nightmares vanish. Until then,
however, we have to do what we can: I mean we must strengthen
the spiritual relationships o f those who suffer and protect them
from the fury o f the enemy.” This is how he would encourage
those who suffered with him: through hope and optimism.
145
Greatly desiring to serve Divine Liturgy, one day, while on

a walk in the courtyard o f the prison, Fr. Arsenic picked up a
nail, a stone and two small wooden sticks. He used the nail as
a lance, the stone as a Diskos,·1 and with the sticks he made a
Cross. With these he served Divine Liturgy daily.
A Securitate document includes the following testimony o f
a cellmate: “ He swiftly overcame all the obstacles he faced, and
he improvised simply and practically all the necessary utensils
he was missing. A string served as his e p itra c h e lio n without
which one could not celebrate the divine services.4 567He would
very piously hang the makeshift epitrachelion around his neck
in the morning, after blessing it first, and at the end o f the
service he would wrap it around the button o f his coat. The
stove was used as the Holy Table, and the H oly Cross was
made out o f two small wooden sticks, kept separately in his
coat’s back pocket in order not to raise any suspicion. He care
fully arranged them on the stove before beginning the morn
ing service, setting in front o f them a thicker piece of wood
to prevent them being seen through the peephole. The Holy
Diskos was a piece o f wood," which he very carefully carried
in the back pocket o f his pants. The water jug was used as
4 Diskos: normally, a metal plate with a stemmed base, on which is placed

the Lamb as well as other particles taken from the prosphoron during the
Proskomcdia.— E d .
5Epitmchelion: a liturgical stole that hangs around the neck o f the priest
and is required to be worn for all priestly duties.— E d .
6 Fr. Arsenie had read in a book written by an authority on Church sub
jects that the epitrachelion can be replaced with a piece o f long material o r a
long string. He used this string as an epitrachelion, hiding it in the seam o fh is
coat and taking it out o f prison upon his release. W hen he was hosted at the
patriarchate, he gave it to one o f the nuns and asked her to burn it, but when
she heard what it was used for, she exclaimed, “ Oh, Father, how could I burn
it?!" and she piously preserved it.— E d .
7 This is what the cellmate recalled. Other sources mention Fr. Arsenie
using a stone as a diskos. Perhaps he used both in prison.— T r a n s .
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ALIVE IN DEATH
a Chalice, in which he placed water instead o f wine and the

bread he kept from his morning ration, cutting only the top
part as the Holy Lamb with a specific ritual. The only thing
he was missing was the holy antimension,8 which he could not
improvise because it requires a martyr’s relic. In the beginning
he possessed a small piece o f the relics of St. Mercurius, but
he very sorrowfully lost it during a search at Jilava Prison. The
Liturgy ended by seven o'clock, when the activities began. At
the time o f Communion, everyone in the room proceeded in
line to receive a small piece o f bread and a sip o f water. Father
would acknowledge the missing elements of the service: ‘I do
the service as it is done in a church and if the good God sees
our struggle and wills it, this bread and water are indeed His
Body and Blood.’ As the Liturgy is celebrated on a daily basis,
now everyone in turn donates a piece from his bread ration for
Holy Communion the next day.”910
Fr. Arsenic later recounted: “Every day I would repeat the
steps o f the Divine Liturgy. I had a small jug with water and
three hundred grams o f barley bread. I considered the jug to be
a Chalice and would follow all the steps o f the Divine Liturgy.
Afterwards, I would distribute that bread to the prisoners and
would tell them: T can’t say it’s Holy Communion, since there
are many elements missing, but I can tell you that it’s more
than antidvron.'1"
“ Many prisoners asked me to confess them, because they
didn’t know if they would live until the next day. They would
communicate these matters through Morse code, and I’d re
spond: ‘Tomorrow morning vou should stand in your cell in a
8Antimension: a cloth representing the Saviors shroud in which His

Body was lain. This cloth contains a piece ot a martyr’s relics and upon this
the Divine Liturgy is celebrated.— E d .
9 a c n s a s . Informant File 185005, pp. 185-95.
10Antidoron·. the portion o f holy bread not used as the Lamb. This bread
is distributed at the end o f the Holy Liturgy to all o f the faithful.— E d .
147
certain place and remember your sins!’ And after I finished the
so-called Liturgy, I would grant absolution to all o f them, but
with one condition: to confess again if they met a priest [face
to face]. If they died, the absolution I gave them would remain
valid, and this happened quite often.”
In addition to confessing and communing, especially those
in his cell, he would also teach them prayers and Psalms and
all that was needful for the salvation o f one’s soul. All these
activities did not go unnoticed. He was continually sent to soli
tary confinement. In the first two years he was sentenced to i j i
days in isolation.
After another period in solitary confinement he was taken
to Zarca. A cellmate recounted: “He was blowing in his hands
and walking in the cell, trying to warm up. 'Brother, look how
man can end his days. It’s no joke with these people; they have
no mercy or understanding— stony souls. God put us through
a difficult trial, blessed be His Name. Behold, Brother, we have
to be always prepared and pure in heart to receive the Divine
Sacrifice the Lord hands us. A Holy Father said, “ Be always
prepared, for you never know the end o f your days!”’ And his
Reverence continued with an energy driven by the cold, which
was quite bitter in the cell: ‘After they put me in that isolation
cell, I blessed it. Then I fell on my knees and prayed, and all
the time I recited Psalms and I prayed for all o f you, thinking
a lot about you, Brother, as I know you are weak and ill.’” The
“ brother” who recounted this was in fact Fr. Arsenie’s betrayer.
He confirmed that he was ill and at the end o f his rope, expe
riencing a spiritual downfall. “Father embraced me and girded
me with all sorts o f counsels on salvation: ‘Brother, do not lose
your hope in G od; it’s a deadly sin. Wake up at the twelfth
hour and put your trust in the One on High, meditate and
tremble at what awaits you in the next life if you don’t try to
be saved here, for know that the torments o f hell are incompa
rable to the tortures we endure today; it is much more dreadful
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there.... Tomorrow we will all go to the Judgment Seat, and

there: woe unto the one who arrives unprepared. During the
days in which we lived in isolation, you saw how easily the
moment o f death can come. You became discouraged and you
lost your hope in the aid o f God, but, my Brother, this is fool
ishness. Now, especially, you have to entrust yourself to His
might with all your soul. You say that you feel guilty, but who
is sinless in this world? And do you actually believe that there
is no chance for repentance? Don’t you remember that there
is a Holy Mystery [Confession] which can save us even at the
last moment?!’ ” Then Fr. Arsenie confessed him. How much
self-denial and self-sacrifice he possessed, even helping others
(who had also betrayed him) despite his physical exhaustion! It
seems that he was the weakest o f all in his cell, as his cellmates
would ask the regular prisoners (who were allowed to receive
food parcels from friends or relatives) to increase his bread ra
tion so he could gain some strength.
Another cellmate, Marcel Petrişor,11 recounted how Fr. Ar
senie strengthened fellow cross-bearers: “He would not give
us concrete advice, to do this or that, but he would show us
through his example. If someone was taken to solitary confine
ment, he would generously offer him bread from his ration.
He would break off a piece from his portion— not ostenta
tiously, ‘See what I do for you?’— no, it was a natural gesture....
He greatly loved people. He was a man possessed o f an over
whelming ability to love and understand. Otherwise he could
not have resisted.” 112
11 Marcel Petrişor (19 30 - ) is a teacher and writer, known for his mem
oirs o f life in the Com munist prisons o f Romania.— E d .
12 “ Părintele Arsenie Mărturisitorul un mare dar de la Dumnezeu pen
tru neamul nostru— mărturii ale celor care l-au iubit şi l-au însoţit pe ultimul
drum" [Father Arsenie the Confessor, a great gift from G od for our nation—
testimonies o f those who loved him and accompanied him on the last jour
ney], Fam ilia ortodoxă, no. 8 (31), August io n , p. 55.
149
With a warm heart he would find solutions in the most

difficult situations—when those he strove to love would do ev
erything in their power not to be loved. “ I was in prison and 1
had a terrible fellow prisoner. You could never make him hap
py. And I said in my heart, ‘Well, this one also has a mother
who loves him. We don’t love him, but how nice it is that he
also has someone who loves him !’” And with this thought he
was able to refrain from judging this difficult prisoner.
A t one point he was in the same cell with two men, one
who was his long-time friend and another who used to be a
mayor— but a harsh man, both as a mayor and a husband.
Now, in prison, the ex-mayor was sincerely repenting for all his
evil deeds. One day, to ascertain their discernment, Fr. Arse-
nie asked his two cellmates: “ If you knew that in fifty years,
on such-and-such a date you would die, what would you do,
starting today?” The ex-mayor, who was now repenting, said,
“I would remain on my knees until then.” The other one said,
ALIVE IN DEATH
“ There is still time until then.” Fr. Arsenie, later, reflected on

this answer: “As if this time was at his disposal, and God was
obliged to give it to him.” Fr. Arsenie was trying to show them
that the time was there and then, and that their imprisonment
was not useless; it was their opportunity given by God to ex
amine their past and correct it through living the present mo
ment. “ You rectify the past and acquire the future by living the
present well,” as he would often say.
Many years later, Fr. Arsenie related to his disciples how he
survived in prison: “Many have asked me if some miracle hap
pened. First o f all, a miracle is not the work o f man; its a di
vine act to encourage you, to save you. But I answer, ‘Miracles
did take place!’
‘“ What miracles?’ the curious ones ask.
“ ‘Tlie fact that no miracles occurred!’
“ However, to be starved and beaten for years and to live
up to these days13— isn’t that a miracle?!... God protected me
in prison, where there was a regime o f extermination and you
could die at any moment. God protected me in the wilder
ness, where a bear would pass three feet away from me, and it
wouldn’t see me, hiding behind a pine tree. And other wonder
ful things happened, but we cannot talk about them because
then we lose their sweetness. God gives you these moments so
that you can defend the truth more zealously or so as to deliver
you from a terrible passion....
“ That I had indications ... that the human being is divine
and complex— this is something else. I had reached the point
where I could see how the soul leaves the body. I was curious,
as a man, wondering when my soul would exit from my body,
aware, o f course, that it would be at the last moment. You felt
it as a force, as a power....
“The secret was this: the unceasing awareness o f God’s
*3 Fr. A r s e n ie w a s n in e ty -th re e y e a rs o ld in 1 0 0 7 , w h e n h e r e c o u n te d
th ese e v e n ts .— T r a n s .
presence, knowing what you’re suffering for. This is like a tangi

ble explanation, like a dialogue with ones own self, so to speak.
But you can’t rationalize this: we were living in God, we were
in heaven. We couldn’t pretend there. In the midst o f fire you
can’t say ‘more this way or that way’— it’s fire. You burn on all
sides without being consumed; or you’re consumed bit by bit.
“But what was perceived? Something very difficult to com
prehend and convey: One felt there was a very hidden grace, soft
ening the enemy’s sword, which compelled me to say, ‘God shapes
the moments o f history!' This was a sign that the world might
not understand. You were discovering both beauty and God in
man; you were discovering these things— a sense o f great subtlety
that exists in man when he’s present [i.e., aware]. If you’re not in
this state o f continuous awareness o f God’s presence, you collapse,
you’re sold [to the devil]; but these people should not be rejected
if they repent.14 However, [sometimes] the ones who failed and
sold themselves fell for good and were lost. Then I could not trust
them if I would see them, knowing the way they had acted. One [a
fallen inmate who sold himself], who I knew was an agent, even
came to my door at Techirghiol, to investigate me and report to
his superior: ‘This is the one [who is against the Comm unists]!15
I was not concerned; I would not have kissed him, for he would
not have agreed to it.16
“So, through this inner attitude, in an honest and continu
ous relationship with God, you become aware of the grace that
keeps you present in this martyrdom. The saints were tortured;
their heads were cut off... How many o f us would not have
wished to die? A ceaseless, systematic martyrdom meant to
14 There were prisoners who could not endure the torture and agreed to
become spies among the inmates— E d .
15 The Securitatc continued to monitor people who were released from
prison, crying to find ways to rcarrest them.— E d .
16 There is a Romanian custom to give a kiss to your guest, when he ar
rives ( i f you are on good terms).— T r a n s .
ALIVE IN DEATH
destroy you is very hard to endure, to undertake. Thus, I tell

you: you can resist only due to Gods extremely hidden, yet
very real, presence within you. Otherwise it’s not possible, fo r
without M e ye can do nothing (John 15:5)! We thought we were
on a great Christian mission, like during apostolic times or,
later, like the era before the Holy Emperor Constantine, when
there were ten million martyrs.”
In addition to sending Fr. Arsenie to countless detentions in
solitary confinement, the prison administration began to keep
a record o f surveillance on him in April of i960. This practice
continued in all the places he would later live. The motives for
this sprang from the Securitatc’s obsessive fear, since they inter
preted his every action according to their own measure. Thus,
his care for his spiritual children—trying to find out news
about them, to encourage and strengthen them in suffering—
was for the Securitate an attempt to give directions to these
“hostile elements.” His attempt to catechize them and acquaint
them with the beauties o f the Orthodox Faith was for the Se
curitate “an activity o f indoctrination and fanaticism.” Their
aim was to use this record to unveil “the criminal and hostile
activities” o f “ Prisoner Papacioc.” Despite their ill intentions,
they were only able to reveal unknown aspects o f his extraor
dinary life in prison: his steadfastness, courage, perseverance,
discernment, and continuous sacrifice, a record which other
wise would have been lost. Colonel Crăciun, the chief o f the
prison, once characterized Fr. Arsenie as follows: “ In prison he
maintained a constant hostile attitude, trying and sometimes
managing to influence them [his fellow prisoners] to believe in
the divine power.... He is predisposed to continue this hostile
activity o f religious propaganda even in freedom.” Yet, through
their meticulous attempts to denigrate him, they only paint
ed the finishing strokes on a portrait o f a hero o f Christ. Fr.
Arsenie would comment to those in his cell on the Securitate
agents’ constant fear: “ Look at their dreadful surveillance and
153
how they bristle at every innocent act we do. They fear even
their own shadow. As it says in the Patericon, ‘The unbeliever
runs without being chased by anyone.’”
Once, he was taken out o f his cell blindfolded. Unable to
see where he was walking, he slammed his foot into a step,
and his big toenail pierced his flesh. It was very painful, but
worse than that, it became infected. The prisoners at Zarca re
ceived no medical assistance, so Fr. Arsenic had to take care o f
it himself. While on a walk in the courtyard he found a small
rusty piece o f sheet metal. He struggled to use it like a pair o f
tweezers, enduring pain known only to him, until he plucked
out the nail that had pierced his toe. But the problem was not
completely resolved, because the toe would often get infected.
The nail that grew in its place was thicker and always sensitive
when trimmed. He would say, “How much mileage have these
feet gotten!”
“I f you fell sick, they would take you and inflict harsher
measures upon you— they would keep you isolated, so you
couldn’t contact anyone, and you would die. In 1961 I had
surgery to remove some hemorrhoids. It was extremely painful
because the area is full o f nerves, and I had the surgery with no
anesthesia. After the surgery, which took place at 11 a.m., they
were supposed to give me a pain-relief shot, but they only gave
it to me at one in the morning.” When he was brought back to
his cell and he complained about the terrible pain, one o f his
cellmates reprimanded him, “Father, how come even you are
complaining?” Fr. Arsenie later related, “Never in my life did I
experience worse pain than after this surgery. It hurt constant
ly for seventy days. Once the guards came and my cellmates
showed them the surgical area, where the intestine dangled. In
such circumstances the guards would rejoice that you were suf
fering. They would take you and put you alone in a cell, to care
for you, supposedly, but their actual goal was to kill you faster
there without being seen.”
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At some point the inmates were awaiting the arrival o f a

new prisoner in their cell. Fr. Arsenie was discussing this pros
pect with a cellmate, “Does anyone know what these brothers
[the Securitate agents] want to do with us?”
His indignant cellmate told him, “Father, you’re saying
brothers? More like devils!”
“You’re making a mistake! They are made in the same im
age as we are, and they are still our brothers in the Lord,” 17 Fr.
Arsenie replied.
The “ brothers” were those who tortured them, took them
to Zarea and put them in refrigerator-cells, left them to die o f
starvation, cruelly humiliated them, cursed them in the most
foul ways, “forgot” about them in sickness, and subjected them
to all the horrors a perverse human mind could devise. And
this was not for a minute or a week or even a month, but for
entire years, one after the other. Love, love o f one’s enemies,
was a virtue that Fr. Arsenic had nurtured since early child
hood, but now it was revealed in all its splendor and glory. The
greatest o f these is love, the Holy Apostle Paul said (I Cor. 13:13).
And years later Fr. Arsenie would encourage his listeners: “ Let
us greatly love, and let us love gracefully. Let us love the wound
and the one who caused it.” He had become a man experienced
in living the pinnacle o f Scripture. “Accept any blow as spiritual
people do. Good people help you greatly toward salvation, but
the evil-doers, even more. Suffer them without causing them
trouble. All the ages have been filled with enemies, but the en
emies o f this age have filled the heavens with saints.”
As one who had attained love o f enemies, he would help
those who were struggling to do so. One o f Fr. Arsenie’s spiri
tual children, who had also been imprisoned and had suffered
the tortures o f reeducation, later confessed to him that he was
unable to forget the countenances o f those who had tortured
17 Marcel Petrişor, Cum plite încercări, D oam ne! [Dreadful trials, O
Lord!] (Bucharest: Christiana Press, 10 11), p. 516.
155
E T E R N IT Y IN T H E M O M E NT
him in prison— thus, he was unable to forgive them. When he

asked what he could do, Fr. Arsenie replied, “ It’s simple: the
enemy you cannot forgive is like a wild beast that you’re car
rying on your back. The condemned one is not he— the ene
my—but you, becoming the slave o f your personal resentments.
The cure takes just a nanosecond: shake the wild beast o ff your
back, and you’ll immediately feel light and free.” 18
In prison, “an hour would pass quickly, a day even more
quickly, and a year more quickly, because I was waiting to be
released,” Fr. Arsenie later recounted. In the midst o f all this
suffering he preserved his pristine hope, seeing God’s will in
all things. “God shapes the moments o f history,” he would say,
to the astonishment o f his cellmates, who, although they were
persevering in this battle, did not have his serenity.
Toward the end o f 1961, after three years in prison, Fr. A r
senie had developed a regular routine in the cell, modified with
small cautious changes so as not to provoke those who were
constantly watching and waiting for the slightest opportunity
to put him back in solitary confinement in order to eliminate
him. God protected him and he did not endanger himself. He
never treated the guards with disrespect or contempt, although
he defended himself when it was proper. Nevertheless, he never
exposed himself needlessly or provoked them in a direct con
frontation. The war was a game o f intelligence, and Fr. Arsenie
treated it accordingly.
A report made to the Securitate by one o f Fr. Arsenie’s
cellmates (his most eager informer) witnesses to Fr. Arsenie’s
great faith: “ Fr. Arsenie seems the same as I knew him last
year, with small changes in his daily routine and more prudent
in dealing with the administration. Time and the events he has
gone through have made him ‘wiser,’ as he often likes to say.
H is strong faith in G od has kept his spirits up and enabled
18 Archbishop Bartolomeu Anania, Cartea deschisă a îm părăţiei [The
open book o f the Kingdom] (Bucharest: ib m b o r Press, 1005), pp. 15 0 -5 1.
ALIVE IN DEATH
him to hope for a release in the near future— preparing for

it unceasingly. Moreover, he rejoices in the ‘goodness’ o f the
people around him, who pay heed to his words full o f wis
dom— being nurtured in ‘the Spirit o f the Lord.’ In the morn
ing, as in times past, he serves Matins [actually, the Divine
Liturgy] in front o f the stove, facing the door, kneeling for a
short while only when the ‘Holy Spirit’ is invoked to descend
and fill him with grace. He refrains from using the jug o f wa
ter and the ‘small piece’ o f bread, the Body and Blood o f the
Lord, and a pcicc o f yarn he used to place around his neck as
an epitrachelion. And he makes the sign o f the Cross more
in his mind than with his hand, watching very carefully so as
not to be seen through the peephole. He makes me and Uta
humbly sit on the bed and tacitly participate at the service— as
i f nothing had ever happened. On the other side, Br. Dumi-
tru is slightly moving his lips while gazing with the corner of
his eye at Father, piously bowing down every time he brings
his hand to his forehead. Then he looks at me to see if I’m
doing the same. After he has his bread and coffee, somewhat
tired after the service, Father naps for a half an hour, and then
he zealously begins to preach, showing the significance o f the
liturgical day (if he still remembers the commemorations o f
the day) or recounting a lesson from the Patericon, the Philo-
kalia, the Pedalion (The Book o f Canons), etc. This lasts until
lunch. The prison schedule and the mandatory routine in the
cell disturb [the flow o f spiritual endeavor]. As he would say,
‘time goes by quickly and the labor in preparing for salvation is
never enough.’ There is a discussion in the evening that draws
to a close about an hour before the lights are out. During that
hour all o f them are silent and contemplative, concluding the
day with praises to the Lord and set prayers. The next day
everything is repeated.”
Fr. Arsenie would explain to his cellmate the benefits o f be
ing diligent and watchful: “My Brother, God gave me wisdom
i57
in my imprisonment and taught me to guard myself. There arc

many who lost their souls and sold themselves to the devil—
I mean, the administration. I lament for these poor men, for
they don’t understand what they do. Can you imagine what it
means to lose your eternal place? Only the Blessed Theodora
returned to life after God took her soul and confessed to men
how frightful and unfortunate arc the souls o f sinners at the
tollhouses.19 Throngs o f demonic hosts come there and try
them in all sorts o f ways. If someone stabbed you in the eye
with a needle or examined your organs with a knife, it would
be nothing compared to the torments there.... Alas, alas, what
will happen there! You should know this!”
Yet, there were not just informers but also faithful people
among Fr. Arsenie’s co-sufferers, people who saw in him a true
spiritual guide. They did not miss the opportunity, given by
God, to spiritually benefit from his grace-filled presence. One
o f his cellmates said to another, “Brother, pay attention to Fr.
Arsenie; seek to benefit as much as you can from him, tor you
have much to learn. Zealously ask him everything, because it
he sees you persevering, he rejoices and guides you. I confess to
you that I pray daily for his health and weep in my prayers, glo
rifying God for having mercy on me and bringing him into my
life. In meeting him, my life has changed and been filled with
light. Even before [I came here], I had spiritual preparation and
experience. I had embarked on this [spiritual] path from when
I was outside prison. But the path was narrow, and lately I had
withdrawn, living a life barren o f contemplation and prayer. Fr.
Arsenic has shown me the purpose o f life; it is not an accident
that he is with us. God so willed it. I realized this as soon as I
met him. I was waiting for him, and not for a year or two, but
for twenty. You could not find such a spiritual father outside
prison. Maybe one on Mount Athos, but he is unique in our
19 Blessed Theodora’s description o f the tollhouses is contained within
the Life o f St. Basil the Younger (commemorated March 1 6 ).— E d .
1 58
ALIVE IN DEATH
country. He is a saint!”20 Another co-sufferer later confessed:

“ This one [Fr. Arsenie] has faith comparable in strength only
to that o f the early Christian martyrs. He is able to endure the
harshest tortures for the Faith, without complaining or com
promising.”
During this time the preparatory plans for reeducation
were completed. Colonel Crăciun rearranged the prisoners in
cells, not randomly, but in a well-devised manner. Thus, a pris
oner who had gone through the horrors o f Piteşti prison21 was
placed in every cell, with the aim that these men would be the
first to accept reeducation and then influence the others.
At the end ot 1961 and the beginning o f 1961, the reedu
cation process began. The Securitate agents desired that bv
the end o f the reeducation the prisoners would renounce ev
erything sacred in their lives, and most o f all would renounce
God. The chapel was converted into a club room hosting the
reeducation. The prisoners were invited to read, play chess, and
have discussions at the club. The cell doors would be open, and
they would be tree to gather at the club. The temptation was
great because the majority were intellectuals, some avid read
ers who had not seen a book in years. Some went, at first out
o f curiosity, but then never returned to their cells. They be
came “reeducators.” However, most ot them refused Colonel
Crăciun’s traps and did not go to the club. “No sign at the club
... o f Aurel State, Abbot Papacioc, Prince Ghyka....”22 Numer
ous documents include statements o f Securitate agents declar
ing that Fr. Arsenie “refused to participate in the cultural-edu
cational activity [reeducation].”
In these kinds o f documents, many o f which are in
cluded in the files o f a c n s a s (The Archives o f the National
Council for Studying the Securitate Archives), Fr. Arsenie’s
20 a c n s a s . Informant file 185005, vol. 3, pp. 10 4 -16 .

21 The prison where the reeducation experiments began in 1949.— E d .
22 Petrişor, Cum plite încercări, p. 518.
159
torturers— those who had beaten him, spit on him, humiliated

him, “created conditions” for him to die in terrible sufferings,
instituting an entire realm o f terror and fear—powerlessly rec
ognized that Fr. Arsenie did not take part in the reeducation.
Specifically, he witnessed Christ by his own life, he defended
the Orthodox Faith with every drop o f blood that dripped
from the wounds they had inflicted on him, and he did not
betray his friends and co-sufferers, in spite o f the pressures he
had to face.
These documents, signed by his torturers, prove once again
his position as a Christian confessor.
Some prisoners rejoiced in their freedom to leave their cells
and meet people they knew or had only heard of. Thus, one
o f the prisoners, Voinea, went to visit those in the cell where
Fr. Arsenie, Aurcl State, Prince Alexandru Ghyka, and Marcel
Petrijor lived, or rather, survived. Marcel Petrijor recounted
the story: “For him (Voinea), Abbot Papacioc was the greatest
enigma. He had heard some who knew him talk about him,
but he could not remember anyone mentioning any remarkable
fact— only that he was a man who was never upset by anything
inflicted upon him. He did not care about the prison, starva
tion, cold, darkness, thirst, beatings, or anything that might
have been done to destroy him. Moreover, he would cake ev
erything— as Voinea heard—with a smile on his lips, no one
and nothing ever being able to snatch him from abiding with
in. This is how he welcomed him [Voinea] when he knocked
on the door: with an angelic face beneath a stately brow and
eyes that seemed to stream tears o f joy.”23
Since the “recalcitrant ones” from Zarca would not come
willingly to the club, they were brought by force to listen to
the declarations o f those who were now following the path o f
Communist materialism. They had to watch movies on the
23 Ibid., p. 539.
160
achievements o f the Communist Party, but instead they would

turn their backs to the screen and talk among themselves, Fr.
Arscnie was placed in isolation for three days for not paying
attention and conversing with other prisoners during one o f
these movies.
One day an inspection team from the Ministry o f Internal
Affairs came to check the status of the reeducation program
at Aiud. Not satisfied with what they found at the club, they
proceeded to inspect the cells. Arriving in front o f Fr. Arsenie’s
cell, they hesitated to enter, especially because Colonel Crăciun
had warned them that completely uncompromising prisoners
abode there. They eventually entered. “Prince Ghyka was stand
ing, as usual, upright like a statue. State was walking around
on his crutches, avoiding bothering the prince. But Nae Co-
jocaru (a prisoner who had previously been built into a wall,
while alive, in prison)2'1 would not even get out o f bed unless
you rolled him onto his side. Abbot Papacioc, with his peaceful
smile, had withdrawn into a corner, with his head bent a little,
as though wanting to see the thoughts o f the devil by glancing
at them from under his eyebrows.”2*25 The other prisoners be
gan to argue with the inspectors, getting them terribly angry;
only Prince Ghyka and Fr. Arsenic kept silent. The prince later
2i* In April o f I9S7, a group o f prisoners at the Zarca at Aiud Prison was
transferred to the Zarca at Gherla after a protest culminating in a hunger
strike. One o f them was the renowned military officer Nae Cojocaru, also a
Legionnaire, who had gone through numerous harrowing experiences during
World War II, in prison camps and prisons, even in the far North, beyond the
Arctic Circle. A t the order o f Goiciu, the prison commander at Gherla, he was
“ built into the wall alive” in a small cell, a sepulcher 10 feet long and 4.5 feet
wide, with a wooden shutter, freshly built in between two old walls o f a prison
corridor. Here he would receive a meal daily, at lunch. Nine months later, on
April 1,1958, a prison officer broke one ot the new walls o f the sepulcher, and
Nae Cojocaru was released from this dreadftil condemnation to death and
brought back to A iud.— T r a n s .
25 Petrijor, Cum plite incercari, p. 545.
161
E T E R N I T Y IN T H E M O M E N T
justified his contempt for these “subhumans,” as he called those

who had come for the inspection, but Fr. Arsenic kept silent out
o f discernment; he was engaged in a hidden battle. As he would
say later on, “ 1 want the enemy to hit me where I want, not
where he wants.” Drastic measures were implemented after this
inspection. They were sent to different cells. Some were taken
to reeducation, but the recalcitrant ones were isolated at Zarca
under a dreadful regime and little food. Those who accepted
the reeducation and frequented the club were moved into big,
clean rooms, with sheets on their beds and nutritious food.
The reeducation continued at Aiud. As one who did
not adhere to it, Fr. Arsenic was called one day to Colonel
Craciun’s office. In these situations, the one taken out from his
cell would usually not return alive. Fr. Arsenic recalled the en
counter himself:
“ ‘Tell me about the existence o f G o d!’ said the colonel.
“ ‘You, at your age, are asking me an elementary-school
question? I ’ve taught children, and they would ask me the
same thing. The fact that you and I are now talking is an argu
ment proving that God exists. Our existence, our breath, our
intelligence, our reason prove it. The eyes with which we see,
the heart that keeps us alive and loves— are they human gifts or
are they from God? These prove God’s existence. The mere fact
that we [the prisoners] suffer and live is proof.’
“Seeing himself defeated, he asked, ‘What is your last word?’
“ ‘I ’m ready to die for what I ’m telling you! I ’m ready to die
for Christ!’ (I was thinking to myself: I ’m going to die anyway,
so at least I should die for Christ.)
“ ‘Take him away! Enough!’ (From this point on they
sought to kill me, but not in an overt manner; they would of
ten put me in the refrigerator.)”
More people began, with reluctance, to attend the club; at
the same time the population placed in solitary confinement
increased. “Craciun had ordered the guards, especially those at
Zarca and Cellular [another section in the prison], to report

the prisoners’ slightest misbehavior: the longest incarceration
was given for falling asleep on the edge o f the bed during the
seventeen hours o f vigil, for tapping on the wall (Morse code),
and for any rebuff directed toward the guards.”26 Such reports
were concocted about Fr. Arsenic, who was put in solitary con
finement for not buttoning his shirt (three days o f isolation),
being found “lying with a leg in bed” (ten days), “sleeping in a
sitting position on the edge o f the bed” (ten days), and “spread
ing religious propaganda” (ten days).
“ They tried very hard to annihilate me. They would put
me in the refrigerator, where they’d keep me for a few days.
Extraordinary things happened to me there. There was such
suffering and pain that you didn’t even think you would get
out alive.” Fr. Arsenic would confess that he had experienced
the most exalted spiritual moments in prison, not in the wil
derness. “Can you imagine what experiences Christ had on the
Cross, when He was suffering for the whole world?”
In the fall o f 1963 and during the following winter, the
treatment applied to the “recalcitrant ones” at Zarca intensified,
becoming even more brutal. The food got worse every day, and
prisoners were constantly being sent to solitary confinement.
On November 11, a guard reported Fr. Arsenie for “spreading
religious propaganda in his cell. The inmate was talking loudly
in his cell and could be perfectly heard even in the hall and
in the neighboring cells.” Consequently, he ordered him to be
sent to solitary confinement for ten days with a “severe regime,”
beginning on Christmas Eve, December 14 , 1963.
Fr. Arsenie was to be sent to the “refrigerator” cell, a sentence
he had already received numerous times. Later in life he recount
ed the terrors o f that punishment: “They had a torture technique,
a diabolic method— they would put you in a refrigerator. You
26 Ibid., p. 548.
163
would be dead in three days. It was extremely difficult for me to

endure that unbelievable cold. If there were another person, it
would be better, because you would cling to each other and get
warmer. I’m certain the angels in heaven were jealous o f us, since
they don’t have this suffering, which is beyond our [human] na
ture. The refrigerator was a frigid cell, cement all around, over
sixteen feet high. You weren’t allowed to lie down on the floor;
you could only sit on the latrine barrel from ten at night to five in
the morning. Other than that, we had to move around. We didn’t
even have enough strength to breathe, and we forced ourselves to
blow into our hands to warm up. When you would breathe it felt
like your soul was coming out o f your body. They kept me there
for three days, and I didn’t die. They kept me there for five days,
and I didn’t die! The last time I was sentenced to the refrigerator
it was for seven days, but they kept me there for only five days,
because many had died. We were constantly monitored through
peepholes, many times per minute, so they could take us out in
case we died.
“It was still ‘you’ from a conceptual point o f view. Only ‘you’
were fully aware o f why you were there. Your enemies didn’t mat
ter anymore. The Truth ‘you’ were serving mattered.27 Well, I tell
yo u ... this joy— the Joy o f the Cross— cannot be expressed ratio
nally. It was very hard. However, you were in direct contact with
an Eternity that was represented by Jesus Christ.”
On Christmas Eve, 1963, there was a terrible freeze outside,
and the isolation rooms at Aiud were packed. The cell was com
pletely dark. It was winter, and frost covered the ground, but
they had nothing heavier than shirts on. After spending three
days in that Tartarus, Fr. Arsenie was extremely weak. The door
opened and another prisoner was shoved in; Marin Naidim, his
long time co-sufferer. After tortures, starvation, and beatings,
27 Fr. Arsenie is stating that only by being united to Christ was he able
to survive his imprisonment. At the same time, his identity was never lost in
this union.— T r a n s .
164
Marin stood up for a while in that cell and then, totally ex
hausted and overwhelmed with pain, he decided to lie on the
ground to rest. This would have been certain death. Fr. Arsenie,
however, was prompt: “Don’t lie down,” he whispered, “ I tried
earlier. And as I was falling asleep, I awoke being pulled by my
legs by an angel: 'Get up, Arsenic, i f you don’t want to d ie! This
is not the place to sleep! Your time hasn’t come y et!’’’
In the middle o f the night, while the prisoners in isolation
were struggling to stay alive, the wife o f Colonel Crăciun was
having a nightmare— like the wife o f Pilate o f old— in their
apartment next door, beyond the wall o f the prison. Fright
ened, she jumped out o f bed and told her husband, “‘Go and
do something about those under your supervision, for I don’t
know if they or I are going to treeze to death.’ Halfway asleep,
Crăciun first woke himself fully and walked toward the prison
sections. Not really knowing how, he ended up in the isola
tion section, in the hallway with the ten punishment cells [the
refrigerators]. In the first cell opened by the guard he found
two young men, with only their shirts on, every limb shaking
because o f the cold.”2*1 Those two were Fr. Arsenie and Marin
Naidim. Colonel Crăciun then “ordered all the isolation cells
to be opened, sending us to our cells, saying, ‘You were lucky
my wife had a nightmare and woke up asking me to come and
take you out o f here, so I wouldn’t have you on my conscience.
And well, who can withstand the complaining o f a woman?!’”29
Even Crăciun could not refuse his wife’s request. Behold, this
was the will o f G od: Fr. Arsenie would not die there, nor the
others who were struggling with him.
After this wondrous release from the refrigerator, “they took
me into a cell. Emerging from the refrigerator was like heaven
for us. In the cell I found a piece o f moldy green mămăligă. I
didn’t even care it was like that; I ate it immediately. Nothing
28 Petrişor, Cum plite încercări, p. 519.
29 Andronescu, Reeducarea, p. 40.
Marin Naidim when he was first arrested in his youth.
happened to me; my body had been cleansed through that last

ing. Obviously, I also had the aid o f God. It was Christmas and
I said, ‘Look at the cozonacw I ’ve received!’”
After Fr. Arsenie’s repose in the Lord, a nun (one of his
spiritual daughters) gave a written testimony o f a marvelous
event from his imprisonment. This was something he had re
lated to her when she was struggling against temptations at
the beginnings o f her monastic life. “Seeing me sorrowful, he
once shared with me his experience, saying with a very serious
expression: ‘You don’t have great trials, such as not knowing
what will happen to you in the next moment, not having the
certainty that you’ll live until tomorrow. You don’t realize how
much God loves us in the midst o f suffering. He is by our side
in tribulations. He endures our burden with us, for not even a
hair o f our head moves without God’s consent.’ Seeing I was30
30 Romanian sweet bread, traditionally baked for Pascha and Christ

mas.— E d .
166
still puzzled, and also because o f my weakness, he revealed to

me what had happened to him years earlier in prison at Aiud:
‘“ I was in prison. You cannot imagine what that means: cold,
striped uniform, no personal belongings, a small, measured piece
o f bread as sustenance. Those in the cell would take turns pick
ing up the crumbs that might fall on the ground, thinking that
these might fill us up. We looked more like shadows than men.
Moreover, we were interrogated, threatened, and condemned co a
regime o f extermination. I was also placed in Zarea, in the refrig
erator. In that agony I would walk, pray, but I could feel how I was
getting cold ... how my soul was leaving my body and ascending.
In my prayer to God I would shout within me, “ Lord, I’m here
and I ’m dying for Thee; remember me, O Lord!” and all o f a sud
den Christ the Savior appeared next to me, in divine light and
warmth. He was by my side, suffering with me—wearing a striped
uniform and suffering, my suffering. Then I understood that time
is not measured by God as it is by men, tor everything seemed to
last only a moment.... And without me realizing it, time passed,
the door o f the cell opened, and the guards came to take out my
frozen body, but they didn’t find it so, tor it had been warmed by
grace, by the grace o f God.’
“ Father had asked me not to share these events with any
one during his lifetime. Years have passed, and I have never
been capable o f talking to anyone about this. I knew that I
could not speak in Father’s presence, because he did not want
these things to be known, generally avoiding queries about his
visions in prison or in the wilderness. And how much he had
to say! But he would refrain from speaking about them out o f
humility, fleeing human praise.”31
31 Nun Magdalena Ştefan, “ Rugăciunile şi prezenţa Părintelui mă ajutau

să mă ridic” [Fathers prayers and presence would help me arise], in Iulian
Dumitraşcu, Părintele Arsenic Papacioc, i f 14 -2 0 14 . 0sută de a n i de la naştere
[Father Arsenie Papacioc, 19 14 - 10 14 : A hundred years from his birth] (Bu
charest: Basilica, 10 14 ), p. 89.
Out o f humility, Fr. Arsenie would never recount these vi

sions, although in his discussions he would allude to them, as
he did in an interview: “If you were going to question some
one who had seriously prayed (in prison, in the wilderness, in
the cell, on the street, or even at the office), he would guard
himself from saying that he had seen such and such a thing [a
vision]— although these things do occur. If you only knew how
far beyond yourself that vision is: being encompassed by a joy
and hope beyond our understanding. [After such a vision] the
first thought is to keep silent and not talk, for questions on
these matters are idle curiosity and not helpful at all. Everyone
should know that the Savior brought to the world the knowl
edge that salvation comes through suffering. Suffering is ex
tremely necessary; it has to be endured as long as God wills it,
because He knows our suffering. It is very difficult to say what
the rewards are, what unseen forces help. That is, they exist
for sure.... Who has suffered and hasn’t had extraordinary mo
ments o f revelation and things even greater?’”32 The strength
bestowed on believers from Above is in accordance with their
suffering and to the measure they accept that suffering.
The prison administration used diverse measures to make
the unyielding prisoners conform. Along the hallways they
placed speakers that broadcast the capitulation o f a former con
fessor for all the prisoners to hear. At mealtime the prisoners
once found a large, sizzling steak on their tin plate instead o f
the usual plain broth. Although, after so many years o f dread
ful starvation, all o f them were living skeletons, many— includ
ing Fr. Arsenie—would not touch it. Nor would they go to the
club, as they were advised to do after receiving the steak. Every
possible method o f breaking the strength o f character o f these
men or defaming them in some way was attempted, but they
32 Fr. Arsenie Papacioc, “Sfaturi duhovniceşti” [Spiritual counsels], part

i, video interview with Sorin Dumitrcscu, recorded on July 14 ,19 9 3 , posted
on June 15 ,10 15 , https://www.youtube.com /watch?v=37lm_Fv64W k.
168
never attained their goal. “You knew that this suffering was
for the Great Truth, because they were trying to disfigure your
thoughts and your soul with their various methods. You paid
with your life for this, for defeating them, for not consenting,
for being a great hero, saying, ‘I will not accept this thing, sir!’"
The repeated attempts to crush the resistance o f the prison
ers in Zarca culminated with a meeting in March 1964. All the
prisoners in Zarca, except those bedridden, were taken by force
to the club, which was now held in a big hall that could con
tain everyone who had not yet completed their reeducation.
“ They would take us out o f our cells for conferences.’ Once,
some o f our corrupted people began speaking as part o f the
reeducation. It was a big hall, and I stood up in the middle o f
it and told them: ‘What are you saying? What do you know
about the Middle Ages? The Middle Ages were theocentric—
they put God first in their lives.’ I declared, 'Because o f some
miserable popes, you’re denouncing the Church o f Christ and
the Christian virtues!’ They could have killed me for such bold
ness. All o f them looked astonished, not knowing who dared
to speak up at such a gathering. Protesting meant death on the
spot. I don’t know how I got lost in the crowd, for they did
nothing to me. It was the will o f G od!” Upon exiting the hall,
he encountered Fr. Marcu and encouraged him, saying, “ Take
care o f yourself; don’t give up!” He directed him to be prudent
and not fast too much, eating whatever he could find in order
to resist physically.
“Another time, in an immense hall ... we were in a mixed
group [reeducated prisoners with those who had not been bro
ken], and a certain reeducated man started talking, attacking
the holy emperor Constantine the Great. And from among all
the people, a little one stood up (I was that one): ‘What are
you talking about? The holy emperor Constantine the Great
elevated the Cross— In hoc signo vinces (Under this sign you
shall conquer).’ And their entire plan was shattered. Certainly
they’ll kill me now [I thought]. And this is the miracle: they

didn’t kill me. People don’t realize that this is a miracle; they
say it’s a fluke that they forgot about me! As far as I ’m con
cerned, they were constantly pursuing me to kill me.”
“It was clear that God was truly protecting us, although we
were always on our enemies’ blacklist. We couldn’t give up; we
weren’t playing games with our lives. At Aiud, the issue was no
longer the Legionnaire movement. They wanted to completely
annihilate our faith in Christ. This was their goal, more im
portant than the other one [the abolition o f the Legionnaire
Movement].
After the March “conference,” the pressure from the ad
ministration decreased. Those at Zarea were taken to regular
sections and began to receive supplementary food from sur
pluses at meals, so that upon their release no one would see the
conditions they had lived in. They were “extraordinarily skinny.
Some were so grace-filled that they seemed actual shadows.” '3
Those who had stained their conscience in reeducation clubs
were among the first to be released. Colonel Crăciun was
throwing a last piece o f bait for those left, so that, in their
eagerness and longing for their release, some might lose their
human dignity. His hope was in vain. The former residents o f
Zarea maintained their patience. At the end o f July, Colonel
Crăciun himself read them the decree o f amnesty.
Every prisoner had to reclaim his belongings from the pris
on warehouse and wait for his ride to the train station. “ Physi
cally I was healthy, but I was extremely weak.” At the infirmary
he received some injections to strengthen him, because, other
wise, he would not have been able to stand on his feet. “ When
they returned my coat to me, I didn’t recognize it: it was wrin
kled, and so many years had passed since my arrest.”
It was August i, the Feast o f the Procession o f the Holy 3
33 Andronescu, Reeducarea, p. 119.

Cross. Those who had worthily carried their heavy cross were
now exiting the gate o f the prison. Among the victors was Fr.
Arsenie. “ W ith a ceaseless smile on his lips, with his face il
lumined and untroubled by what had come upon him, he was
going toward the gate, accompanied only by Someone unseen,
W h o had never taken His [protecting] hand from him.... One
o f the guards who knew him said to another, ‘Holiness goes
out the gate!’”34
34 Pccrifor, Cum plite incercari, p. 587.
171
C H A P T E R ELEVEN
RELEASE
E c a m e o u t o f prison,” wrote Fr. Arsenie, “with no

W beards, with no flesh on our bodies, no teeth, with our
eyes hidden in their sockets, but still radiant. We came out not
looking like priests.” It was 1964 when Fr. Arsenie was finally
freed from his long years o f confinement. His first stop was the
Suceava Monastery, where some o f his spiritual daughters re
sided. The nuns were horrified by his appearance: he was mere
skin and bones. They fed him, cared for him, and put him back
on his feet.
After gaining some strength, he set o ff for Bucharest. “ I
was traveling by train and, after so many years in prison, I saw
women wearing short skirts. In my compartment there were
two teachers wearing shore skirts; one sat right across from me.
When they saw I was a monk they boldly asked my opinion on
short skirts. I replied, T m a monk and I ’ve never seen a wom
an’s legs above the knees until now, but I never would have
thought they were so ugly!’” After his comment, they tried to
stretch their skirts down, although they were too short to cover
any more o f their legs.
In Bucharest Fr. Arsenie received medical treatment at
Colţea Hospital. He lived for a while in Bucharest, at the
house o f the famous architect Mihai Urzică, the author o f a
very valuable book, M iracles an d False M iracles. While there,
he went to the patriarchate, seeking a blessing to enter a mon
astery where he could continue his monastic life, but because
he was part o f the Diocese o f Moldavia, he was sent to Iaşi.
171
R ELEA SE
“I went to get a blessing from the Metropolitan o f M ol

davia to join a monastery. He refused. He told me that there
was a newly issued decree expeling the monks from the mon
asteries, and therefore he could not receive me. He told me,
‘G o home, to your mother!’ How could I go home?! I was a
monk, a priest; I had to go to a monastery.” And so Fr. Arsenie
returned to Bucharest.
W hile still in Moldavia, Elder Cleopa, who was hiding in
the mountains, sent him a message saying he wanted to see
him. He had heard Fr. Arsenie had been released, but, like the
Aposde Thomas, he said, Except I shall see ... I w ill not believe
(John 10 :15). Fr· Arsenie related: “I went with two fathers—
two hieromonks— to the place where he was living in the for
est, and we arrived only with difficulty. I was very weak. I had
stomach problems. We found him. We embraced each other
wholeheartedly and we had a glass o f wine. He told me that I’d
get well, relating to me— from his abundant knowledge—St.
John Chrysostom’s words from his commentary on St. Paul’s
Episde to Timothy on the significance o f a glass o f wine (cf. I
Tim . 5:15). And this is how we got him [Elder Cleopa] out o f
the wilderness and brought him to the monastery.”
Returning to Bucharest, Fr. Arsenie petitioned for a place
in a monastery in the vicinity. While waiting for a decision,
he lived at the patriarchate and then at his younger brother’s
home in Bucharest. He would attend the divine services at An-
tim Monastery and at the patriarchate, where he would meet
with Frs. Benedict (Ghiu$) and Ghenadie (Ghenoiu). Very
slowly he began to regain his monastic appearance, once again
wearing monastic garments and growing his beard back.
Notwithstanding his opportunity to emigrate on differ
ent occasions, he refused to leave his country, which was in
great need o f priests. Even traveling outside the country was
not something he was interested in, although he did make pil
grimages to the H oly Land and Mount Athos. Later in life, he
173
stated, “ I did not care for traveling to foreign countries. Some

are attracted by exotic places, but the essential thing is to have
peace, tranquility in your soul. What can be more beautiful
than the vision o f the heavens ?”
The Securitate was completely opposed to his assignment
to Cernica Monastery, afraid o f keeping Fr. Arsenie near Bu
charest, where many o f his prison comrades were living. Thus,
Patriarch Justinian had to relinquish his desire to have him
there and devised a new plan. “Patriarch Justinian told me that
in Transylvania there were parishes still vacant from the time o f
World War I, and he sent me there. Tcofil, the Metropolitan o f
Transylvania, received me very kindly and assigned me as par
ish priest in the village o f Filea de Jos, [in Cluj county,] and a
year later he also assigned me to the other village, Filea de Sus.
The Metropolitan knew me, and he appreciated me even when
I was at Slatina Monastery. I was still young at the time; I was
only about fifty.”
Fr. Arsenie was assigned to Filea in April o f 1965, the day
before Pascha, having to fly to Cluj and then drive for six hours
on a muddy road less then ten miles long. Hearing that he flew
to get there, the villagers thought he was a spy. They were skep
tical at first, but eventually they all came to love him. The en
tire village came to see him. They would say, “A new father has
come!” He overheard someone in the church saying, “ What
small hands he has!” “I said to myself: I ’ll catch you with this
small hand!” And that is what happened. “ It was the work o f
God.” In one o f his letters addressed to his spiritual children,
Fr. Arsenie described his situation at that time:
“I was given permission by the Department o f Religions to
be the parish priest in a commune, in the diocese o f Cluj. There
was a lot o f talk about me. The patriarch wished to keep me in
Bucharest, or nearby, at some monastery, but that was impos
sible. It was easier to assign me to a parish. So, desiring with
all my heart to remain a monk and to serve, I have accepted
174
Fr. Arsenie in 1965, one year after his release from Aiud.
this situation. Now I have my own altar and I serve the Divine
Liturgy, and I care for a thousand souls.
“I have my peace and joy. I pray, I teach the village the way
to salvation, and I serve. Now I can have time to cultivate the
virtue o f love and my relations with my spiritual children. I
commemorate you with much love, contentment, and freedom
at the Proskomedia.
“Here, I ’ve started with the fundamentals in teaching the
people. They’ve begun to love me, and I, to know them. I ar
rived here on the night o f Pascha. My first greeting was: Christ
is Risen! From then until now I have been busy with arranging
the house where I live. I’ve assumed complete responsibility for
the parish and its administration.
“It’s pretty cold here. It has rained almost every day. The
area is quite beautiful. The village is surrounded by hills, and
the Apuseni Mountains can be seen six to ten miles away, with
the peaks, and even the plateau, full o f snow. When it rains,
the alleys are full o f mud. And I ’m feeling great!”
Fr. Arsenie remembered: “The villagers were very poor. On
the first Pascha we received five lei [at the collection], and on
the second, three lei.” Fr. Arsenie purchased vestments, two
chalice sets, and a vigil lamp. He crafted a set o f cardboard
marriage crowns. Later, he was able to obtain a set of metal
crowns, but at weddings the villagers kept asking for the older
ones, saying they were more beautiful. From his spiritual chil
dren throughout the country, he received icons with which he
beautifully adorned the church.
The following year, under Fr. Arsenie’s supervision, the
church was restored and reconsecrated and the rectory remod
eled. He gathered the villagers near the church, teaching them
and answering all their questions. He focused on Confession
and the Divine Liturgy, and he encouraged the abandonment
o f long-standing non-Orthodox customs. “ It was a village
with many Catholics, but I did not utter a single word against
176
R ELEA SE
Catholicism; I simply maintained my Orthodox mode o f life.

W hen I left there were no Catholics in the village: everyone
was Orthodox. I was very involved with the youth. They would
be gone to school during the week, but I would speak with
them when they returned on weekends. Even now [in 2.000], I
receive letters from there....” Many o f the youth and the faith
ful o f Filea continued to seek his spiritual guidance at the
monasteries where he later lived.
Some o f Fr. Arsenie’s spiritual children from Slatina,
Sihăstria, and Bucharest sought his support and guidance dur
ing his time at Filea. Among them there were monks and nuns
who had been removed from monasteries due to Decree 410.
He would encourage them to keep their monastic vows, cleans
ing them through Confession and counseling them in letters.
A t the end o f the persecution, they returned to the monasteries.
There was another category o f people who followed him
“religiously” at Filea, namely, the Securitate agents. He had es
caped the closed prison and had now entered the open prison
o f agents and informers, who would track his every deed, move,
visit, correspondence, and word. Fr. Arsenie continued to bear
a heavy cross. Quoting Victor Hugo, he would say, “I escaped
punishment, but I didn’t escape condemnation.” The unceas
ing surveillance and harassment would continue for twenty-five
years— a weighty cross he would bear, always hoping in God
and trusting in His divine will.
The Securitate was interested in Fr. Arsenie’s every deed,
word, and thought. Gathering “evidence” to malign him, they
twisted it with their corrupt minds. All the while they ignored
the truth: that he was a man o f God. At times, forced by the re
ality o f their findings, they would recognize his spiritual depth,
as seen in the comments o f a lieutenant colonel who reviewed
the reports: “Being a priest well acquainted with the traditional
subjects o f Christian theology, taking very seriously all the pos
itive aspects o f Christian ethics, and especially understanding
177
The church o f
Pilea de Jos.
the rules (canons) an Orthodox Christian should follow in life.

Arsenic Papacioc is appreciated by many o f the believers in our
country. He is considered a good spiritual father and guide in
issues o f Christian ethics.... Regarding spiritual matters, Arse-
nie Papacioc is a renowned priest and can be considered, with
no exaggeration, a ‘model priest.’ In his devotion to the Church
and to the priesthood, he performs the daily tasks required o f a
diligent priest (tiring services, Confession, religious support for
the faithful who come to the monastery, etc.).” 1
Despite such positive remarks, the “almighty” Securitate
was engaging in an unequal battle with the humble hieromonk
Arsenie, using every tool at their disposal: expert methods, gov
ernment funding, a multitude o f informers and officers, power,
and a malicious reputation. Fr. Arsenie fought only with the
1 a c n sa s Informant file 185003, vol. 1, pp. 4 1-4 }.
178
R ELEA SE
weapons given to him by Christ: discernment, humility, prayer,

long-suffering in the midst o f troubles, laboring in good deeds,
almsgiving, and above all love— love for his neighbor.
Because the Securitate was following him, the village au
thorities would harass him. An administrator refused to give
him a straw mattress to sleep on, saying that a priest can sleep
on the floor.
Fr. Arsenic was renowned for the sermons he gave at funer
als. Once, there were two other priests at a funeral. Each had
fifteen minutes for a sermon. The first priest spoke in a scholas
tic manner. Fr. Arsenic took a different approach. He said, “A
young man built a spacious and beautiful house. Someone told
him, 'You’ve made a big mistake. You built a door.’
‘“ W hy is that a mistake?’ asked the young man.
‘“ Because through this door they’ll take you out when you
die.’ ”
The villagers appreciated the parable so much that a widow
said, “ Father, come preach at my funeral also!”
Fr. Arsenie recalled: “They would tell me, ‘Do a funeral
with twelve Gospel readings for us!’2 It was convenient for
me because 1 would scop in front o f City Hall and choose the
proper Gospel reading; it was like propaganda for me, as I
would give a sermon at each Gospel reading.”
At times, the villagers would steal from each other, and
Fr. Arsenie pondered on how he could break them o f this bad
habit. When one o f them came to Confession, Fr. Arsenie did
not give him absolution. He instructed the man to go and re
turn what he had stolen (some kind o f livestock), but the man
told him he did not have the animal any more; he had sold it.
The man complained to Fr. Arsenie o f having no money to buy
back the animal, and Fr. Arsenie offered to loan him the neces
sary amount. Now it was the question o f returning the animal.
2 In certain areas o f Romania there is a custom in which twelve Gospel
readings are done during the procession to the cemetery.— E d .
179
Photograph o f
Fr. Arsenic from
the 1960s.
Tie man was ashamed; his deed would have been revealed.
. r. Arsenie asked him how he had stolen the animal. “ Well,
I broke the fence,” said the man. “ You should do the same
now. Break the fence, put the animal back, and then cover the
hole so it can’t escape, and that’s it!” The man did accordingly.
Others, counseled by Fr. Arsenic, followed suit, in order to re
ceive absolution and Holy Communion. Seeing their missing
animals reappear in their courtyards, the villagers began to say,
“Father performs miracles.” Fr. Arsenie cold them, “Brothers, it
is not I who performs miracles; it is God. Did you pray? Were
you sorry for the loss o f the animal?”
“Yes.”
“ Well, you see, God brought it back to you!”
Others, whose animals were stolen, would come to him
180
R ELEA SE
and say, “Father, pray for me too: six o f my sheep were stolen!”
(“And I would start to investigate, to see who had stolen the six
sheep, to return them”)
He would participate at all the clergy meetings in his dis
trict, Turda, and he once gave a very edifying homily on the
Christian woman. The priests loved it and thanked him. They
were all married, except him. (“And I was only a child then.
H ow old was I? No more than fifty”)
The value o f womankind was a recurring theme in Fr Ar-
senies teachings: “ The woman has to live in harmony with her
husband. They have to work together for the supreme goal: sal
vation. The woman is the heart o f the family, as the man is the
head o f the family. If there’s no heart, the head is empty. The
two o f them should have a relationship o f total self-sacrifice,
not a conventional one. The woman can give birth to Christ in
her husband’s heart.”
And elsewhere he said: “The woman shouldn’t be seen as
a slave. Although we say in the prayers o f the Mystery o f Mar
riage that the woman has to submit to her husband, he has to
be careful because he is told in the same prayer that he has to
love her. If he doesn’t ‘love’ her, the wife will not obey him.
If the man does not heed this word, he is responsible for the
woman’s obstinacy. Thus, he has to love her by all means.”
Due to Fr. Arscnie’s great success as a pastor and preacher,
the bishop named him the best priest in the diocese. (“I don’t
know i f I was the best, but I know I was not the worst”)
The priest assigned to Filea after Fr. Arsenie’s departure
once asked him, “ Father, what did you do to the people at
Filea? Because they talk only about you. W hat’s your secret?”
“ W hat secret, Father? There’s no secret,” replied Fr. Arsenie.
The villagers o f Filea had great appreciation for their shepherd,
but the Lord was calling him to fulfill another task, that o f ab
bot and spiritual father o f the Cheia Monastery.
18 1
C H A P T E R TW ELVE
PEACE AM IDST TRIALS
1967, Patriarch Justinian finally succeeded in naming

I
N JU L Y
Fr. Arsenie abbot o f Cheia Monastery, a position he held
for a period o f six years. This obedience is mentioned in Fr.
Arsenies correspondence:
“I ’ve moved on to Cheia. If somehow it happens that I
leave here for somewhere else, against my will, I ’ll write you;
but it doesn’t seem so, and I don’t desire it, either. I say this,
since I don’t know the Lord’s will!”
At the time o f his arrival, Cheia Monastery had a large
guesthouse for priests. In addition to priests spending their
vacations there, the monastery also hosted lay people drawn
by the low rates. “It was a prestigious monastery, with a guest
house. We collected money, and we had to deduct the expenses
[from the revenue].”
The guesthouse affected the monastery’s spiritual life. There
was more emphasis on the administration o f the guesthouse
than on the divine services, the rule o f prayer, and Confession.
Fr. Arsenie arrived to correct these shortcomings, yet the previ
ous abbot and the nun managing the guesthouse did not look
upon his efforts with favorable eyes. They were collaborators
with the Securitate, instigating many anonymous slanderous
complaints against Fr. Arsenie.
In a letter to some o f his spiritual children, Fr. Arsenie ex
pressed his insight concerning the purpose o f these trials, as he
had experienced others much more difficult in prison. He told
them, “I ’m sustained by the hope that this work will not be in
P E A C E A M ID S T T R IA L S
Cheia Monastery.
vain... This great God shows us greater love when He tries us

with more challenging lessons.... This is where peace, the great
peace o f Christian heroism, is found.”
Close to the monastery there was a youth camp that would
schedule visits to the monastery. Father never lost the opportu
nity to give the young people soul-profiting words in addition
to the icons and small crosses that they received as blessings. His
seeds bore fruit; many o f the youth became his spiritual children.
In the midst o f trials Fr. Arsenie also had the comfort of
a close friend, a young monk he had admired at Slatina Mon
astery: Gavriil (Stoica). This monk later became his spiritual
child. When Fr. Arsenie was released from Aiud, Fr. Gavriil
was imprisoned for two years for distributing religious books.
Upon his arrival at Cheia, Fr. Arsenie sent him [at that time a
hierodeacon] a message, telling him he was waiting for him to
serve as a deacon there. Thus he had the consolation o f a close,
sincere, and devout disciple. “We were always o f one heart,” Fr.
Arsenie would say. Later, when Fr. Gavriil became a priest, Fr.
Arsenie would go to him for Confession, each being the oth
er’s spiritual father. This father, the renowned Archimandrite
183
Gavriil (Stoica) o f Zamfira Monastery, fell asleep in the Lord

in zoo8, three years before Fr. Arsenie.
A t Cheia, Fr. Arsenie would tell the brethren: “ If you felt
the claws o f the devil on your back, you wouldn’t put o ff re
pentance!”
Spiritual children from throughout the country would
seek him for counsel and Confession here— people who had
met him once and could never forget him. He was very de
voted to serving in the altar, where, during the Proskomedia,
he would “encounter,” on the commemoration lists, everyone
who had been associated with Cheia, the living and the de
parted, pilgrims and founders. On one commemoration list he
had found the name o f a great prince o f Moldavia, Stephen the
Great [who was later canonized]. “ When I saw that Stephen
was there, on my page, I realized how great the priesthood was.
I said, ‘Now 1 have you on the tip o f my lance!’ but I was ner
vous... Being together with everybody, living and departed...
Proskomedia is the greatest thing.”
Conscious o f the gift o f the priesthood, he said, “ I, Arsenie
the sinner, an unknown monk, get to commemorate Stephen
the Great. The eternal, blessed life o f the blameless prince o f
Moldavia may depend on my commemorations. As little and
wretched as I am, God has bestowed upon me His gift: He an-
nointed me as a priest o f the living and the dead!”
At Cheia, where the founders of the monastery were descen
dants o f St. Stephen the Great, Fr. Arsenie strove to hold firmly
the sword o f word and deed. Many feared to openly confess their
Faith in that period o f Communist persecution. One day, while
he was visiting some acquaintances, together with the previous
abbot and another father, the twelve-year-old granddaughter o f
the host asked them about the meaning o f the words “spiritual
father,” which she had heard in their conversation. Fr. Arsenie
told her: “A spiritual father is the priest to whom you confess your
sins: that you did not obey your parents, your teachers, etc. You
184
should know this and not believe everything said in books nowa
days.” The girl’s grandparents were shocked on hearing this, but
he said to them, “I only fear Christ!” Afraid, the two fathers who
had come with him got up and left. Only Fr. Arsenie remained
seated, continuing his confession o f Faith.
Fr. Arsenie was like a mirror revealing everyone as he tru
ly was, and this bothered those who saw their image in that
mirror. They were disturbed by the fact that his beard was too
long; that he entered the church at 7 a.m. and came out at
8:30 p.m.; that there were always faithful at his door seeking
his counsel; that he spent a lot o f time writing to his spiritual
children, molding them with his living words; that he was in
volved with the youth, encouraging them to live in chastity;
that he was good to those who betrayed him, commemorating
them and their families, always counseling them in all things;
that he endured offenses and slanders; that “he was concerned
only with the salvation o f the soul” and “sought by every means
to draw as many people to the Church as possible” (as the in
formers would note); that he was engrossed in the organiza
tion o f the monastic life in the monastery. In conclusion: his
mindfulness o f his priestly mission would disquiet them. He
was charged with all these “offenses,” yet, as he would confess
in a letter to a co-sufferer, “I have plenty o f trials, but I have
much peace in my depths.”
As we have seen, the Securitate did not like the elders
spiritual life. Therefore, the agents decided to isolate and com
promise him in front o f the faithful and the monastics. They
proceeded deviously. Some agents tried to become close to Fr.
Arsenie’s acquaintances in order to get close to him. The next
step was to have these agents seem to agree with everything he
said, to support him in certain activities, and to praise him in
front o f everyone. When they would become close to him they
would start slandering him. The calumniation o f friends would
be more powerful than that o f enemies.
Fr. Arsenic during the 1960s.
They were not able to fulfill their plan, as Fr. Arsenie was
very attentive. He discovered some informants who asked him
“some useless, yet suspect, questions.” Others could not get
close to him because he was “very prudent and did not seek
to befriend everyone, only those tested by him.” And another
category was unable to catch him in his words. He mainly took
186
part in religious discussions, and if anyone tried to change the

topic to something else, he would delicately withdraw from
that conversation.
The Securitate attacked on multiple fronts. Agents would
intercept all his correspondence— reading and interpreting it.
Yet they found no trace o f conspiracies or intrigues in his let
ters, only his encouragement, his warm heart imparted to his
spiritual children— those who were walking on the paths o f the
Lord— and above all his state o f “constant joy," even though
he felt and knew that he was confined by the officers’ scrutiny.
Could these officers, avid readers o f his letters, have found a
drop o f Fr. Arsenie’s joy? Who knows? But it is certain that
their zeal in transcribing and filing these letters enabled the
preservation o f precious testimonies about his life.
Delays in receiving the correspondence, errors in it, and
undelivered mail made the senders and the receivers o f the mail
think something was going on. Knowing that the Securitate
was following him, Fr. Arsenie became more cautious, sending
the letters through his spiritual children. Thus the Securitate
was no longer able to intercept any o f his letters, although his
correspondence was increasing.
An informant noted that Father was “preoccupied solely
with spiritual matters, although not estranged from political
events and news.” 1 All the evidence procured by the Securitate
only proved he was a zealous monk with no political activity.
Nonetheless, upon his eventual transfer to another monastery
his surveillance file would end up at a new Securitate office,
and they would try again to incriminate him. All to no avail.
Fr. Arsenie’s gentleness drew many people to him, just like
his impressive beard, which was now “pointy and long like that
o f St. Onuphrius.”2 “ I would feel something about the beard,”
Fr. Arsenie would confess, “But I could not express it. And I
1 a c n s a s , Informant file 18500;, vol. 1, pp. 371-73.
2 Plămădeală, Tradiţie şi libertate , p. 167.
Cheia Monastery.
read in Clement o f Alexandria that the beard presents a “vener

able wisdom, conciliating confidence.” '
After one o f his visits to Cheia Monastery, Mihai Radulcscu,
a professor and writer who had gone through the Communist
prisons and became Fr. Arsenie’s spiritual child, recorded a de
scription o f Fr. Arsenic:
“I was a student when I lived in the village of Cheia dur
ing one o f my summer vacations. On the first day, 1 ran to the
local monastery to meet the brethren. The abbot, Fr. Arsenie,
appeared to me as an extraordinary figure. His spirit was peer
less, set on fire by a rare love for his neighbor. He was not very
tall in stature, with a slender and small frame. The skin that
covered his flesh was more transparent than tracing paper. His
nails, equally transparent, and so thin, covered the tips o f his
fingers just enough to change the red o f his blood into a rose
5 Clement o f Alexandria, The Instructor, 5.4, in A . Roberts a n d j. D on
aldson, eds., Ante-Niccne Fathers, vol. 1 (Peabody, Mass.: Hendrickson,
>994 ), p- 2.76.
188
hue. His bright, luminous, or sparkling eyes— according to the

feeling they conveyed— allowed one to pursue his inner depth,
which was untouchable, inexpressible in words, and sweetened
by the honey o f abundant grace. Sometimes his inner depth
was throbbing in the heights, at other times it was floating; yet
it was never drowned on the shore where we, the others, are
stumbling.
“His face, shoulders, chest, even his belly under the heavy
belt— with Alpha and Omega engraved on its metal buckle—
were cloaked by a beard hesitating between white, black, and
gray. The beard seemed to be in dialogue with the surround
ing nature, while Fr. Arsenie was engaged in the Prayer o f the
Heart and conversing with the person in front o f him....
“As for venerable Fr. Arsenie’s gift o f preaching, o f warming
one’s soul, o f giving his subtle, yet vigorous energy to the one
with whom he was speaking— these God-given powers distin
guished him above all those who love the Holy Virgin, making
her ardent servant an incomparable and unprecedented man of
our times. He was imbued with divine love, full o f compassion,
forgiveness, and understanding.
“ Like any recluse who has reached a certain spiritual state,
the abbot knew how to hide his gifts. He refined his spiritual
experiences down to their essences, fashioning them into sym
bols understandable to all and pleasing to all ears.”
Yet not all the ears at Cheia Monastery were open to per
ceive these symbols— not out o f weakness, but out o f unwill
ingness. In referring to the events o f this period, Fr. Arsenie
would later write to a monk at Cheia: “All the temptations o f
the enemy have benefited me and driven me toward an under
standing o f the difficult sayings o f Holy Scripture. ‘Love those
who wrong you and pray for their deliverance from their evil’
(cf. Matt. 5:44). Certainly they will comprehend this one day....
We always have trials, but the good God invariably sets on our
path people who seek our spiritual friendship also, and who
189
could benefit us simply by their sincerity. I, Father, always had

the most sincere intention there, and I did not lose my temper
in the midst o f arrows pointing at me. I understood my duties
in my role, and I especially benefited from your Reverences—
who perceived every hideous gesture and deed committed by
others. I cannot forget you, beloved Father, and I will eagerly
commemorate you throughout my life.”
Here he continued to strive to do God’s will, as expressed
in a little story he would love to recount at every good oppor
tunity: “Alexander the Great once asked a wise man, ‘How can
man become like God?’ ‘If he does what God does,’ replied the
wise man. ‘And what is God doing?’ ‘He loves His enemies.’”
In describing Fr. Arsenie’s spiritual life at Cheia, Mihai
Radulescu quoted the elder’s own words:
“ ‘Quite often I would serve [in the church]. When I was
well into the Divine Liturgy, the blind beggar—who was out
side, guarding the stony threshold o f the church— would enter,
standing rigid and upright at the door. When I would come
out through the Royal Doors, he would look with his blind
eyes into mine. Each one o f us was on guard at a gate— myself
at that o f heaven, him at that o f the world. Often I told myself
that he saw through me into the bosom o f Abraham.’
“Fr. Arsenie was a pillar o f the Most High, unwilling to
bend and be defeated. He stood fast even when he was thrown
into the damp confinement o f prisons. Like an oak tree that
turns to stone when kept in water, after every imprisonment
he came forth facing the waves o f life with greater and greater
strength.
“Once, recounting to me about the Burning Bush, and
about the exalted conversations held by the members o f that
group, he told me that the danger o f all-dominating atheism
had placed them in a dilemma: How should the monasteries
act in those foul times? Were they obliged to open wide their
gates to the people, so that they could come at any time to
190
quench their thirst with the right teaching, or on the contrary:

should the monks and nuns withdraw behind secure gates,
studded and locked seven times seven, seeking their individual
and communal salvation? After long and ardent debates held in
spiritual earnestness, they reached the conclusion that opening
the monasteries to the world was the Christian way. And they
lived accordingly, with an abundance o f brotherly love.”4
4 M ihai Rădulescu, R ugul A prins: D uhovnicii O rtodoxiei sub lespezi in

tem niţele comuniste [The Burning Bush: Orthodox spiritual fathers buried un
der slabs in Com munist prisons] (Bucharest: Ramida Press, 1993).
C H A P T E R T H IR T E E N
PU R SU ED
D e c e m b e r 19 71, Fr. Arsenie was transferred to Caldaru-
I
n
§ani Monastery, having the obedience o f treasurer and ca

shier. Here the vigilance o f the Securitate reached its peak. In
order to constantly monitor him, they installed hidden micro
phones in his cell, a method they would also use later, at Cer-
nica Monastery. Yet all their efforts were in vain, for Fr. Arsenie
was here for only nine months, and nothing unusual was found
in the recordings. He was monitored wherever he went, with a
detailed record o f the time, place, and people he met. If pos
sible, a transcript o f his conversations would be kept. Although
he had already reached a respectable age, Fr. Arsenic was still
very agile, and his pursuers had a hard time keeping up with
him. They would note in their reports, “ He walks very fast, or
even runs, a very curious thing, taking into consideration his
age.” (He was over fifty.) Consequently, the agents named him
“the Brave”— correctly identifying the one who battled against
them.
All the reports o f the Securitate informers, who attempted
to obtain incriminating evidence against Fr. Arsenie, revealed
even more clearly his unique personality. The Securitate agents
would recognize “the veil o f holiness” surrounding him, but
this would annoy them; they would laugh at him, they would
mock him. They would tirelessly create different strategies to
squash him. Yet he was a “peaceful and quiet man;” 1 he had no
1 ACNSAS, Informant file 185003, vol. 1, p. 81.
192
P U R SU E D
The church oi the Caldaru;ani Monastery.
political interest, officially or secretly. “ I was a monk before all

else," he would say. And he was a dedicated one, striving with
great care and effort to multiply his treasure— his increasing
number o f spiritual children— sustaining them in prayer, com
memorating them at services, confessing and counseling them
in person or by mail. When his critics saw the piles o f letters
in his cell, they could not imagine that these were spiritual cor
respondences— each reply a labor o f sacrifice and love.
He wrote in a letter: “I am engrossed in so many things.
Being ‘hard-pressed’ has its beneficial side, and, after all, I en
dure and carry on with everything as I am able— governed
by a longing for a salvific life.... I mostly ponder on willingly
becoming nothing for the world and on always increasing my
peace. I ’m not saying I should isolate myself from the world;
I actually desire to give a good ounce o f myself to more and
i93
more people, to earnestly belong to the Lord Christ for the

sake o f the poor world, which has given me the opportunity to
admire it so many times, although it doesn’t understand me.”2
In his inner depths he peacefully accepted the experience at
Caldaru;ani, full o f temptations, knowing it was another exam
on the path o f life. As he wrote in a letter he sent from there:
“I didn’t care much for the ‘gray’ here either, but know that
I am preoccupied by something else wherever I may be. And
you’ll see how one day I ’m going to thank the Good God for
my passing through this place, too. Every place poses a subtle
and delicate question, and I want to rejoice in the future for
my answer today.”5
In September 1971 he had to leave Caldarujani, again be
cause o f the Securitate. Now he was assigned to the Dintr-un
Lemn Monastery. He received this new assignment not as a
punishment, but as a gift from God, as he wrote in a letter
sent from here: “ We have to accept the struggle o f the circum
stances we are placed in, because 1 am amazed at how G od’s
Providence guides us. I cannot stop believing and saying that it
seems as though the Mother o f God took me by the hand and
brought me here, and I feel so close to her, to her Holy Won
derworking Icon from here, at Dintr-un Lemn.” 1
Fr. Arsenie came to the Dintr-un Lemn Monastery labor
ing as a spiritual father and priest, a labor that encompassed
his deepest desires to serve mankind, relieving people from
the burden o f sin through Confession and commemoration at
the Holy Altar. He wrote in a letter: “ I love the church here,
that is, the joy o f the Holy Altar, a joy filled with fragrance for
all those who seek the God o f love and the Mother o f God.”
This was his purpose, and he found his fulfillment in it. His
2 Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc, Epistole [Epistles] (Suceava: Accent

Print Press, 1015), pp. 1 3 - 1 4 .
2 Ibid., p 11.
4 Ibid., p. 1 1 .
19 4
P U R SU E D
spiritual children could not be separated from him, from his

support, and they sought him even here. There was no journey
too long to make if it led to him. He helped them as always,
writing to them, encouraging them, and assuring them o f all
his efforts in preserving them solely for God.
After his experience at Cheia Monastery, where he realized
that Securitate agents were following him, Fr. Arsenic became
more circumspect in his relations with those in and outside the
monastery. His daily labor was to serve in the church and pray
in his cell. Knowing that agents were shadowing him, in his
desire to guard others against their probing, he isolated himself
willingly. He did not engage in any conversations except those
related to his work in the monastery. He would not even go
shopping at the village store, aware that anywhere there could
be someone with evil intentions interested in ensnaring him.
His suspicions were, indeed, well founded. Here the Securitate
was more active than ever.
Father’s “mysticism”— as they called his profound Chris
tian experience— troubled the Securitate agents, as this was a
sensitive matter for the agency. Officially, there was freedom
o f worship in Romania. Tinere was a law regulating the activity
o f different religions and affirming the unrestricted nature o f
religious expression. But in fact the Communist Party had an
atheistic doctrine; moreover, God had to be annihilated, up
rooted, from the hearts and minds o f those who would make
reference to Him. However, this annihilation o f Christ from
the souls o f those who zealously served Him had to be accom
plished secretly, behind the facade o f other ideals.
Thus, from the vast pool o f information gathered in Fr.
Arsenie’s file, the Securitate strove to extract something griev
ous, something significant and unpleasant; however, in spite
o f all their efforts they had nothing. In these circumstances
they sought to fabricate a story to soil his reputation. What re
mained unachievable through torture in prison was now being
195
The wooden church o f the Dintr-un Lemn Monastery.
attempted through all kinds o f schemes to implicate him in

collaborating with the Securitate—plots that never bore fruit.5
Next, the Securitate accused him o f immoral relations,
as he had many spiritual daughters who sought his guidance.
Since such accusations had no basis in reality, they even tried
to entrap him, sending special agents to the monastery to seek
his counsel. Reports from the Securitate files even mention
this: “It is unlikely that he [Fr. Arsenie] would engage in such
an affair.”6 “Female informers were placed [at the monastery] ...
but he did not engage in any affairs.”7 H ie lieutenant in charge
o f this case admitted that Fr. Arsenie “is a blameless man re
garding his morals.”8 A ll their machinations remained fruitless.
5 ACNSAS, Informant file 185005, vol. 1, pp. 1 1 7 - 1 0 .

6 Ibid., vol. 1, p. h i .
7 Ibid., vol. 1, pp. 56-58.
8 Ibid., vol. i , pp. 9 - 1 1 .
19 6
PU R SU ED
Here, just as at Cheia Monastery, the Securitate agents tried

to discredit Fr. Arsenie in front o f the ecclesiastical authorities,
sending anonymous letters accusing him o f various offenses.
Although these letters caused him problems, in the end he was
exonerated because it was easy to see the discrepancy between
the accusations brought by the malefactors and his way o f life.
In the midst o f these events Fr. Arsenie carried this cross,
fully aware o f all the secret dealings. He intuitively knew that
he was being followed, despite the measures taken by the Secu
ritate agents to keep their operation clandestine. He began to
recognize the patterns used by the agents. Thus, he would warn
those he spoke with: “ The Securitate is following our every
step, and every one of us has an overseer. Therefore, we have to
be careful what we discuss and with whom we speak." He knew
the Securitate was reading his correspondence, which induced
him to stop sending his letters by mail. Instead, he asked his
acquaintances to deliver them to their destinations.
The Securitate had every power o f this world at their com
mand, but Fr. Arsenic, contending from a Christian position,
received G od’s aid in battle. As he would later confess in a let
ter: “ I would have fainted if I had allowed myself to rely only
on my human faculties during that time.” This help from Above
changed the balance o f power. The Securitate also noticed this:
the agents would often complain about their lack o f “informers
who could be a match for his talent and preparation.”
Although divine providence overshadowed him, he contin
ued to battle with prudence, with discernment. Here, at Dintr-
un Lemn Monastery, he was more reclusive. This challenged
the agents even more, as they tried to catch him in his words.
He carefully watched his every word and step. Vigilance, that
extraordinary awareness he had practiced in the wilderness, be
came very useful in these moments, since he did not know if
the one he was sincerely talking to was not, in fact, an inform
er. During the time following his release from prison, many o f
197
those to whom he had opened his soul betrayed him to the

Securitate. Through his reserved manner and his voluntary, but
also involuntary, isolation he protected himself as well as those
potential traitors from falling into sin. He protected their souls
more than they themselves did.
He spent a lot o f time in his cell, writing to his spiritual
children, drawing, and carving— isolating himself was the only
way to avoid being drawn into the snares o f the Securitate.
He would do his duty o f serving, which often exhausted him
physically, regardless o f all his sufferings and o f all the unceas
ing plots against him. In an unpublished letter from this pe
riod he wrote: “I am absolutely slain by tiredness, nearly all day
and night. Holy Week was especially beyond my strength. The
Good God’s grace helped me. You should have seen me going
through villages, to women who just gave birth, to sick people,
to the dying, to cemeteries!... I am joyful and I feel great do
ing everything, always reflecting on the Last Judgment, longing
wholeheartedly to be with the Mother o f God. This tiredness
and the tears o f many—who believed I was the one to wipe
them away—brought me great consolation. Many people suf
fer greatly and desire peace beside the Lord Christ. Spiritually,
I feel very well. I spend most o f my days seeing myself at the
Judgment, in the great World beyond this one, and sensing
the benefit I receive from the acts o f my brethren and fellow
men against me. I want to benefit from everything, and this
is possible only if I remain on the cross, with love, if I remain
on the cross, meditating on the Day o f Judgment. I want to
be obedient and patient right up to the grave, convinced that
the grave will have a more understanding voice. Please believe
me— I have spent so much time shepherding souls and I have
gone through such sufferings that I can only reflect, when I
have time, on heaven and its dwellings.”
“I am much at peace regarding my life,” he said in another
unpublished letter, “ but very tense regarding the situation here.
19 8
P U R SU E D
So, in light o f the situation here, I have to maintain my joy and

courage.... So, Arsenie, the Cross...! Because this is the only
way you’ll make sense o f pain and fear in the world.”
He was convinced that everything he was suffering now
was a certain investment in eternity. “You gain much for to
morrow by being spiritually down-to-earth today! Don’t ex
pect to have wings and fly, but get your feet pulled out o f the
muck, being mindful o f eternal joy, and thus you will develop
healthy wings that will keep you soaring aloft. Let us be truly
faithful and understand the importance and beauty o f difficult
days, and how precious today’s offenses and spitting will be one
day! At least now I choose the best method: to keep silent and
endure: I meditate seriously and conscientiously on the day o f
my life’s judgment."
He had placed above the door o f his cell at Dintr-un Lemn
Monastery a sketch o f a skull, which helped him to keep a con
stant remembrance o f death.9 He would spend long periods of
time in his cell due to his liver ailments, unable to procure the
necessary medication. His suffering was the fruit o f the prison
regimen— something he had to endure for the rest o f his life.
Some of the nuns respected Fr. Arscnie’s seclusion, under
standing his deep spiritual life, but others did not. The Secu-
ritate became aware o f this tension and asked for his transfer.
“The patriarch protected me as much as he could. He would
say, ‘This father defended me in prison, while others were slan
dering me, and I should transfer him?’ But he had no choice:
you could not reason with the Communists. He did all that
he could.” Thus, the authorities asked Fr. Arsenie to leave the
monastery on October 9, 1974.
“In 1974 the Communists cast me out o f the Dintr-un
Lemn Monastery and the patriarch brought me to Cernica
Monastery, where I stayed for some time [a year and a half,]
9 See p. 111 above.— E d .
19 9
until a new assignment was finalized.” Here he served and be

gan to receive his spiritual children, lay people, and monastics,
coming from all the places where he had served, and seeking
his prayers and counsel. Many sought his guidance. This was
not pleasing to the Securitate, which continued to monitor his
every movement. They even paid him a visit in his cell, tell
ing him authoritatively that they wished he would disappear.
Fr. Arsenie defended himself, but obviously, the situation was
quite challenging. In a conversation with another father at the
monastery, he said, “Did you know that in important circles
they are talking about the need to annihilate Arsenie Papa-
cioc?” His renown greatly troubled the authorities.
At that time Fr. Arsenie wrote in a letter: “ I ’m not free o f
worries, but I’m feeling well. I’m at Cernica. All love me.... We
have many services. There are twelve priests who serve; some
times there is a hierarchical service. I struggle, have managed to
regain my spiritual calm, and have set out toward my salvation
and the salvation of those who, with respect, ask me to help
them soothe their pains.”
Fathers Gavriil (Stoica), Petroniu (Tanase), Benedict
(Ghiuf), and other o f his close friends would visit and talk
with him. He also became friends with other fathers from Cer
nica Monastery. Fr. Arsenie would say about one of his new
friends, Fr. Ilie (Cioruta),10 a zealous hieromonk, “ If I regret
leaving Cernica Monastery, it is because I was separated from
him.” Fr. Ilie declared that “everything he [Fr. Arsenie] asks
from God, he receives.” He added, “ I don’t know if there are
monks at Cernica Monastery whose combined prayer would
be as [powerful as] the prayer o f Fr. Arsenie.”
The following is the testimony o f a man who underwent an
10 Hierom onk Ilie (Cioruta) (19 09 -19 9 7) spent fifty years as a married
parish priest before being tonsured at Cernica Monastery in 1974. He was
known as a great ascetic and spiritual father. He constantly exhorted the faith
ful to almsgiving.— Ed.
ZOO
PU R SU ED
extraordinary transformation at Cernica through the powerful

prayer o f the elder.
The poet and architect Daniel Turcea was an erudite young
man whose thirst for knowledge had unfortunately led him to
study and practice pagan religions. In the midst o f this spiri
tual crisis he discovered, by God’s Providence, the Church o f
St. Eleftherios in Bucharest. The only thing he desired now was
to find a spiritual father who could understand and help him.
One o f his classmates in college, who knew Fr. Arsenie, recom
mended him as the best guide for the young man. He told him,
“Father is unique: he has great love for his spiritual children;
he is enlightened by the Holy Spirit, being extremely spiritu
ally gifted, wise, and possessing a wonderful soul; and he has
2.01
E T E R N IT Y IN T H E M O M E N T
undergone difficult years o f political imprisonment.” He con

vinced him that only this father could give him the true answers
he was seeking.11 One morning the young man resolved to go
to Cernica. He determined that unless he received answers to
all his doubts and questions he would not be convinced that
Orthodoxy was the right path.
After he attended the Divine Liturgy and prayed at the
relics o f St. Calinic, the young man entered Father’s cell. This
is how he recounted the great meeting to his sister: “ When I
opened the door I was struck by the intense light springing
from Fr. Arsenie’s eyes. I thought he wasn’t real! Kindness and
goodness incarnate! As I was determined to find [the truth], I
gained courage. Regardless o f what I asked, he would answer
promptly, anticipating questions and terms I wasn’t even think
ing about. No question o f mine troubled him. I don’t believe
there is another man so erudite! After he demolished, brick by
brick, the entire edifice o f my knowledge’s vainglory and o f my
mind’s pride—which were about to get me completely lost— he
confessed me. I believe he was praying for me; I was recalling
my childhood sins. Not knowing how to confess, but encour
aged by Father, I said all I had done.” 112
After eight hours spent in the Divine Mystery, Father
gave Daniel absolution and took upon himself the penance he
would have given him. He took a series o f canon books from
his library “and began to write on paper how much is given for
each sin. There were about three hundred fifty years [of pen
ances].” He told him, “Beloved, look what God has forgiven
you. Br. Daniel, know that if a priest saves a thousand people
and loses one soul, he goes to hell with it hung on his neck. If
11 Daniel-Ilie Turcea, U rm ein veşnicie [Traces into eternity] (Iaşi: Doxo-

Iogia Press, îo t j) , pp. 87-88.
12 Iulian Dumitraşcu, Părintele A rsenie Papacioc. 19 14 -2 0 14 . O sută cie
a n i de la naştere [Father Arsenie Papacioc. 1 9 14 - 10 14 . A hundred years from
birth] (Bucharest: Basilica Press, 10 14 ), p. 151.
2.02.
PU R SU ED
you have mercy on my old age ... I beg you to no longer com
mit the grave sins you’ve committed, if you don’t want both o f
us to lose our souls.” 13
Fathers heartfelt counsel became deeply rooted in the
young mans heart. His life changed completely from the mo
ment o f Confession. He had joined the multitude o f lives that
Fr. Arsenie had deeply touched. This encounter was and would
be an eternal seal for the poet’s soul. Two years later he be
gan his studies at the theological faculty, but later he was diag
nosed with leukemia. On his bed o f suffering, he was a fervent
preacher o f the Faith and he wrote religious poetry.1,1 By em
bracing suffering, he converted a Lutheran girl who was suffer
ing from the same illness and was on the brink o f committing
suicide. Despite their terrible sufferings, they traveled from Bu
charest to Techirghiol for her Baptism, performed by Fr. Ar
senie. Shortly after her reception into the Orthodox Church,
both o f them entered into eternity.
When remembering these events, Father would say that
Daniel Turcea’s Confession was the most difficult in his life.
In recounting the atmosphere o f the Confession to the poet’s
sister, Fr. Arsenie said: “ When Br. Daniel entered, with his eyes
so bright and the sincere desire to find the truth, I liked him
on the spot and I told myself: ‘Now I want to see what you can
do, Arsenie! This boy is genuinely questioning—what are you
going to do? He wants to know; don’t lose him! If you con
vince him, you’ve won him!’ I said: ‘Lord, You have said, Take
y e no thou ght how or w hat thin g y e sh a ll answ er, or w hat y e sh a ll
sa y : fo r th e H oly Spirit sh a ll teach you in th e sam e hou r w hat y e
ou gh t to say (Luke i i : i i - i z ).’ Therefore, I crossed myself and I
answered him. Great is the power o f the Holy Cross. He inun
dated me with questions, with complicated and difficult terms;
13 Turcea, Urme in veşnicie, p. 153.

14 D uring the Communist regime, when it was forbidden to possess or
publish his work, these poems were hidden for a year in Fr. Arsenic’s cell.
10 3
you had co be informed to be able to understand them, but

my answers were fitting. I had confessed all kinds o f scholars
in prison, but Br. Daniel’s Confession was the most difficult
in my life. When he began to confess I tried to stop him from
weeping, so I could understand what he was saying because he
was sobbing, but by the good God’s mercy I understood him
perfectly. I haven’t seen a happier man than when I gave him
absolution!” 15 Fr. Arsenie then told Daniel’s sister that his re
turn was also due to their mother’s prayers.
“They appreciated me there, at Cernica,” Fr. Arsenie later
related. “Some even called me ‘the savior o f Cernica.’ They
wanted to make me abbot, but I could not have been the ab
bot with all the Communist agents constantly following me,
recording even the time I went to sleep and arose. The abbot
o f Cernica, to get rid o f me [due to the pressures o f the Secu-
ritate], nominated me for the Techirghiol Monastery [in the
Dobrogea region, on the coast o f the Black Sea], but later on
he regretted making this suggestion.... Many were sorrowful
upon my departure, but we [monks] are like soldiers.”
Upon Fr. Arsenie’s departure from Cernica, Fr. Benedict
(Ghiuf) said, “Are you removing this one too, he who’s the
most blameless o f all?!”
15 Turcea, Urme in veşnicie, p. 155.
10 4
C H A P T E R FOURTEEN
A S E R V A N T TO A L L
N T H E W ORLDLY order o f things, after the age o f sixty or
I seventy, there is a period o f decline in a man’s earthly jour

ney. Everything that needs to be said has been said; everything
that needs to be added has already been added. But things are
completely different in the spiritual hierarchy. The lives o f great
people are crowned only toward the end, as the Apostle says:
R em em ber them w hich have th e rule over you ... w hose fa ith fo l
low, considerin g th e en d o f th eir conversation (Heb. 1 5:7).
And so Fr. Arsenie also crowned his life with the works o f
his old age. Everything he had accumulated throughout his life,
all his spiritual growth (constant, as has been noticed) bore
much fruit at Techirghiol. All the things that had happened
by the Providence o f God were now finding their meaning,
merging together as springs forming a mighty river from which
many would quench their thirst for the water o f life.1
Fr. Arsenie’s appointment to Techirghiol Monastery was
not easily accomplished. Initially, some advisors to the patri
arch were afraid to nominate him, thinking that he was a priest
who gave all kinds o f harsh penances, as they knew that he had
lived in the wilderness and gone through prisons. But this was
not Fr. Arsenie. Another impediment was his history as a po
litical prisoner, being considered an enemy o f the nation. In ad
dition, a directive had been issued not to receive him into any
1 The icon o f the Savior meeting the Samaritan woman, painted by Fr.
Sofian (Boghiu), on the north exterior wall o f Fr. Arsenic’s cell, is o f great
significance here. See the illustration on the next page.— E d .
10 5
Icon o f Christ and the Samaritan Woman, painted by hr.

Sofian (Boghiu) on the exterior wall o f hr. Arsenics cell.
monastery. “I wasn’t thinking about being received as a priest,

but just as a simple monk. At that time the priest at Techirghi-
ol Monastery had reposed, and they were looking lor another
one. Techirghiol was considered a ‘foreign land.” Ihere were
many candidates, including myself. The abbess at Techirghiol
had known me in the 1950s, when she was studying theology
in Bucharest and 1 was her spiritual father. She preferred me,
knowing I was more tavorablv disposed toward monasticism.
“The Sccuritate officer who had to approve my appoint
ment hated me because he knew that I had been in prison and
that 1 opposed the Communists. He did not want to sign the
decree. Then I went to his office and told him, ‘Please do not
reject me! I know you’ve heard a lot about me, but it is not
true.’ And knowing he was from Transylvania, I said, ‘Do you
2 The city o f Tcrchirghiol is a tourist destination on the Black Sea, fa

mous for its curative waters and mud baths. The climate and geography are
quite different from the rest o f Romania.— E d .
10 6
A SER V A N T TO A LL
know how much I suffer because my mother was from Transyl

vania?!’ Then the officer reached for the phone, called Techir-
ghiol Monastery, and told them that I would be assigned there.
It was the will o f God in everything.
“ When I received my assignment, the Communists re
quired that I not add anything to the services. That was fine
with me, because I wouldn’t have changed anything, anyway....
“ There were some advisors from the patriarchate charged
with my move when I came to Tcchirghiol. They didn’t believe
that I would manage to survive there, by the seaside, with this
massive influx o f people— tourists and foreigners.... One o f the
advisors was a gifted artist and insisted on painting my por
trait. I finally allowed him. He made me stand motionless for
a week, to capture me well, but when I saw the result, I didn’t
think it looked much like me. Then I showed them my draw
ings o f St. Paul and others. The one who painted my portrait
was deeply moved. Then they began to change their opinion
about me. You see, it was the work of God for me to be here,
at Techirghiol.”
At Techirghiol Monastery his beard was over twenty-five
inches long. When he would bless an icon, he would dry the
drops o f holy water on it with his beard, saying, “ I should use
the beard for something.” The children would be the most im
pressed by his beard. “ When the little children see my beard
they want to pull it, but their mothers don’t allow them. I feel
bad that they don’t let them, because I enjoy it.”
Someone once said that even his manner o f walking in
spired people more than thousands o f sermons. He also had
a very unique way o f censing at services. He would swing the
censer swiftly, and the effect o f his movements would leave a
profound impression on the people.
But most characteristic o f him were his eyes, which revealed
his inner depth, embracing every person that encountered him.
Those windows o f the soul enabled you to see that there was
10 7
Hr. Arsenic with

spiritual children at
Tcchirghiol in 1976.
“somebody” inside. Those who gazed into his piercing blue eyes
were presented with an exam very difficult to pass. His eyes
would search all your depths, “scanning” you, as expressed by
those who went through this test. When he was ninety-five,
a clerk who knew Fr. Arsenie from Zarnejti came to visit him
at Techirghiol. She was impressed to find the bright gaze and
piercing eyes she had seen seventy years earlier. Upon his de
parture into eternity, Fr. Arsenie took his gentle eyes with him,
but, with that vivid gaze, he continues to watch the hearts o f
those who come to him, not just at his grave, but in prayer,
wherever they might be.
During his first year at Techirghiol, Fr. Arsenie was able to
enjoy the tranquility that he had long desired. Soon, however,
the clergy guesthouse was enlarged, and in addition to those
108
A SERVANT TO ALL
staying there, a multitude o f faithful began to seek the coun

sel o f the new father at Techirghiol—who patiently listened to
everyone’s problems, wisely counseling and lifting everyone’s
burdens. Thus, people from that region (Dobrogea), and then
from other places, began to make their way to Techirghiol.
From now on his great ascetic effort would be to guide
souls— the “art o f arts and science o f sciences,” as the Holy Fa
thers call it— which he would continue to do with much toil
until his repose. He served alone, and he confessed the people,
talked to them, and communed them. During the fasts, when
there would be big crowds o f people at his door, he would have
a little free time at lunch, resting with his boots on in order not
to waste any time if someone knocked at his door. Or, as he
once said, “ I fasten fewer buttons so that I only have to loosen
a smaller number. I ’m pretty busy, and I don’t have a moment
o f respite." Whenever he had a chance he would answer a let
ter from the stack on his desk. “I probably receive thirty letters
a day, and even now I haven’t read all o f them. But to answer
them ... When? And how? Here and there, and ... in between
them [his visitors],” he wrote in a letter o f January 1988.3
“I am feeling well, and my soul is ready for the fast that has
begun and for the throng o f people that will come. Regarding
my health, I ’d hazard to say that I’m not sure if I’ve ever been
completely free from pain.”'1 His tiredness, his ailments (he was
sensitive to the cold and would get respiratory illnesses often
associated with head colds) were secondary for him, as he had
to accomplish his mission— and not just in any way, but with
generosity. “ I always labor, but joyfully, and I ’m reinvigorated
with a little cold water on my face.... It’s a simple and, if need
ed, obvious solution.”5
H e would endure and bear all these struggles to the end. “I
3 Archimandrite Arsenic Papacioc, Epistole, p. 44 .

4 Ibid., p. 31.
5 Ibid., p. 31.
Z09
Fr. Arsenic at Techirghiol in the 1980s.
always endure, because 1 have a commandment and a blessing

from the heart: to bring joy and peace to souls and to loose
sins; thus, I won’t be exempt from the Cross.”6
All the labors in God’s house bring great spiritual gain, tor
the laborer is worthy o f his reward (i Tim . 5:18). In a letter sent
during Great Lent he assured a spiritual daughter o f “the maj
esty and grace o f these glorious days, which benefit and till all
o f us with joy so many times. I don’t want to tell you about
fasting, but about a multitude o f mighty prayers and services,
conducted with a pious and great voice: ‘O Lord and Master o f
my life ...,’7 the Great Canon o f St Andrew o f Crete, the Pas
sion Gospels, etc.... There is no question that the services bring
much grace and there are so many deep— and yet unspoken—
meanings. You feel as though you are floating above the malice
and pettiness that lurk around you [as the Securitate continued
6 Ibid., p. 37.
7 The opening line o f the Prayer o f St. Ephraim the Syrian, said every
weekday service o f Great Lent.— E d .
110
to follow him]. It’s not a small thing to remain a man o f love,

a man o f God, and to lay down to sleep at peace with ‘O Lord
and Master o f my life ...’ [on your lips]. The most challenging
thing is to remain motionless [hearing Confessions] for hours
on end, for entire days, and to listen and understand the pains
o f people, and to absolve them with my little heart and my
small hand, to free them all, by God’s mercy. And always with
boldness toward the Mother o f God.”8
In addition to the multitude o f people he received for
counsel, Fr. Arsenic also cared for the spiritual formation o f the
skete’s sisterhood. In a letter he said, “I am feeling well here. I
talk to the nuns for hours every day, especially in the church
and at meals, when most o f us are present.”9
Fr. Arsenic labored at his post until the end o f his life. As
a spiritual father and guide to people walking the path of sal
vation, he had to journey on the “path” with every spiritual
child— to “ bring him from the state o f slavery to the freedom
o f the children o f God” (cf. Rom. 8:2.1). And because he was
never pleased with half-measures, he refused to relax now, de
spite his exhaustion from following this course. “Now it’s not
like my youth, when I had to fight; now the great battle is to
endure.” He once told a nun: “We are here on the first line of
defense; there are some in the second or the third line, but we
are on the front line. If God sent us here to Techirghiol, He
did it with a purpose: thus we have to endure.” In 1987, in a
letter to the fathers o f Sihăstria Monastery, he wrote: “ I have
entered my eleventh year here. Waves, waves o f faithful come
to Techirghiol. I am obliged to receive them, to understand
them, and to give all o f them something, so that they might
leave full o f hope.”
His physical condition helped him in his labor. Throughout
his entire life he was active and agile, mostly due to the sports
8 Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc, Epistole, pp. 4 1 - 4 3 .
9 Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc, Scrisori', p. 61.
211
he had played in his youth. Although he was now over sixty, he

had not lost his vivacity, maintaining it through the exceptional
watchfulness o f his mind. His inner life, in constant movement
and labor, engaged his body in his spiritual work. He would
bound up multiple steps at a time while going to church for ser
vices. Later on, when he could not do this any more, he would
say, “Yes, the fact that I played sports helped me a lot. D o you
remember how I used to spring up these steps?” (Even his fol
lowers, the Securitate agents, would be amazed at his energy,
struggling to shadow him on the streets o f Bucharest.)
Until the end o f his life, Fr. Arsenie washed his face and
body with cold water every morning to rouse his senses. He
would wash his hair two or three times a year. Although he
rarely washed his hair, there was never a speck o f dirt left in
the water, and his pillowcase was always clean.
Fr. Arsenie had great reverence for the priesthood. He
had the well-known habit o f kissing in turn the hand o f each
priest he would encounter, regardless o f their age. “ We have to
show the proper respect for the priest. There are young priests
whose hand I kiss with all my love. They are ill at ease, but I ’ve
told them so many times that I don’t kiss their hand, but the
hand o f the priest in them.” He would say that the grace o f
the priesthood is the same, regardless o f the priest; this grace
sanctifies and forgives sins, the only difference among priests
being their experience and zeal. (“I cannot do anything more
than you can,” he would say to the priests.)
The priests coming to seek his counsel would be reminded
o f their great mission and responsibility. He would encour
age them, saying; “God has created two extraordinary things,
which cannot be made more perfect than He has made them.
He has created a great, grace-filled woman, who gave birth to
God, and He has created the priesthood, which brings God
down from heaven and gives birth to Him on the Holy Table.”
Fr. Arsenie would serve with great earnestness and
ziz
A SE R V A N T TO A LL
self-sacrifice. A young priest, newly graduated from the theo

logical university, told Fr. Arsenic at the end o f two weeks o f
liturgical practice with him: “Father, with fear o f God I con
fess to you: I have not learned in all the years at the university
as much as I have learned from your Reverence in these two
weeks.” Fr. Arsenie explained to the young priest the signifi
cance o f every gesture, o f every liturgical movement, as he had
learned them and then lived them at every service. He was con
vinced that “if a priest served the Divine Liturgy as he should,
that is, with fervor, he would gain a priestly freedom and ac
quire many souls for Christ.” He would unveil the mysteries o f
the Orthodox Faith to the lay people who desired to under
stand the richness and beauty o f Orthodoxy.
When he was still a young spiritual father, the future met
ropolitan Bartolomeu (Anania)10 once asked Fr. Arsenie to give
him a spiritual word. Fr. Arsenie told him: “ There is only one
person in Confession, the one who is confessing. The spiri
tual father is just an anonymous mediator.” (“He liked what
I said,” Fr. Arsenic would recount.) He would also impart to
his spiritual children the importance o f Confession, a mystery
o f exceeding benefit: “ Through Confession you escape the fire
o f Gehenna and you move toward a place in eternity. What a
great thing God has given us, to forgive each other the things
that could earn us hell. Hell is the great sorrow o f God.” The
ability to be saved is here, in Confession, whatever you might
have done, because “any misfortune is meaningless, and noth
ing is lost, as long as faith stands on its feet, the head is raised
again, and the soul does not give up.”
Fr. Arsenie was able to penetrate the secret places o f the
soul, to search with exceptional delicacy every wrinkle where
a sin might have hidden. With great patience he would lift
the penitent from the depths o f despair, not allowing him to
10 Metropolitan o f C luj, Alba, Crişana, and Maramureş. He reposed on
January 3 1, i o n .— E d .
113
depart until he was anchored in hope and in his responsibility

to attain salvation.
Fr. Arsenic’s warm words, counsels and gentle chastisements
were healing salves for wounded souls, which would then de
part with joy and hope o f salvation. And so, waves o f pilgrims
would visit him from dawn until late at night. Being asked how
he could manage such a torrent o f people, Fr. Arsenie said:
“You are saved through people if you are present [in a state
o f watchfulness], if you are master, if you know how to guide
them. People are everywhere; there’s nothing we can do. I ’m
not afraid o f people; it’s just that they tire me. They tire me
physically, so that at night I fall like a rock, and this happens
every night. This is life! We cannot explain how we are able
to carry on; we cannot explain the source o f our knowledge,
how much strength we have, what our limits are. The truth is
that we have to be honest and humble.... God comes to your
aid if you are honest and love the people. I don’t philosophize.
Philosophizing is a big mistake, because only a contrite heart
knows God.”
Throughout his time in Techirghiol, Fr. Arscnie served in
the wooden church, dedicated to the Holy Apostles Peter and
Paul, with the exception o f a short period o f time (1995-1997),
when due to the restoration o f the frescoes in the church he
served in a temporary chapel in one o f the monastery build
ings. There was a special bond between Fr. Arsenie and the
wooden church. The church, originally from Mureş county in
Transylvania, was moved by King Carol II to Sinaia, and then
brought to Techirghiol by Patriarch Justinian, in an attempt
to preserve this valuable work o f art from the Communists. “I
prefer this little church, which completed me; I was presiding
in it and it presided over me.” This relationship was beautifully
expressed by another father: “Father and the little church are
the image and likeness o f Orthodoxy: modest in appearance,
but their hearts are as wide as heaven.”
It would be cold in the little church in the winter and
extremely hot in the summer, especially in the altar area. Dur
ing the summer Fr. Arsenie would sweat terribly, so that by
the end o f the service he would be soaked. But he never com
plained, enduring stoically. Upon arriving at his cell, he would
have to change all his clothing. Once he was so drenched in
sweat that the nun helping him suggested he should change
his ryassa also. He had recently received a new ryassa, made
out o f a fine and soft material, and he should have worn it
instead o f the wet one, but he refused. Because it was special,
he would not wear it, even now in time o f need. H e changed
his inner clothing, but kept his wet ryassa. Later on his beauti
ful ryassa got stolen, and he rejoiced that he was freed from it.
The priests who served in the little church during the summer
marveled at how Fr. Arsenie endured serving many years in

such heat.
The words o f the Psalmist, The zeal o f thine house hath eaten
me up (Ps. 69:9), were especially descriptive o f Fr. Arsenie. Dur
ing Great Lent he would enter the church at 4:50 a.m., so he
could finish Proskomedia with the commemoration o f a multi
tude o f lists o f names by 8 a.m. He greatly loved the Proskome
dia, considering it “the greatest thing in heaven and on earth.”
He would be very exacting in commemorating the lists, knowing
that this was the place and time when much could be attained
with a simple act, and he would not hesitate to do it. At the me
morial services held on Saturdays, he would exit the church only
around noon, after he had finished reading the last commemo
ration list. He said, “The living have many opportunities— they
can offer a commemoration list, they can go to the priests— but
the departed do not have these opportunities, and everything
is left to the zeal o f the priest.” Once a faithful woman brought
him additional commemoration lists from her acquaintances.
One o f them was from a poor older woman, who gave a small
donation. She showed it to Fr. Arsenie and he told her, “ I will
commemorate this one first because this is the widows mite (cf.
Mark 11 :4 1 - 4 4 , Luke 1 1 : 1 - 4 ) ”
He would also commemorate all those who had helped
him during the course o f his long life. This was the way he
chose to “keep in touch” with all the fathers he had met and
labored alongside. He placed meeting in prayer above a physi
cal encounter, since time for traveling and reunions was impos
sible: he was engaged in a continuous battle to gain souls.
A ll this spiritual effort was not bereft o f pains and sorrows.
Due to the tortures suffered in prison, Fr. Arsenie had problems
with his hearing. At Techirghiol, they became more acute, and he
had to undergo surgery on his right ear. Eventually he was forced
to wear hearing aids. He suffered much because o f this condi
tion, as listening was at the heart o f his ministry. Nevertheless, he
1 16
A SE R V A N T T O A L L
endured this also, being faithful to the words o f the Savior: M y

strength is made perfect in weakness (II Cor. 11:9).
The harsh conditions o f prison had also aggravated his di
gestive problems. Slowly, through the care o f the nuns, these
problems diminished, but they never disappeared. One year he
had to be hospitalized due to such ailments. A visitor to the
hospital recounted: “He was lying in bed, with bruises from
the IV; he was very weak and pale, and I was trying to en
courage him. But the opposite happened: after my conversa
tion with Father, I left joyful and happy, but he continued to
remain in bed, still sick.” Fr. Arscnie did not forget about his
duty as spiritual doctor and guide even while in the hospital.
Around 1986, Fr. Arsenie badly injured his left hand. While
attempting to cork a bottle, he struck the uncooperative cork
with his hand, causing the neck o f the bottle to break, and a
shard o f glass penetrated his palm. The wound bled terribly and
required surgery. As a result o f the accident, a nerve was dam
aged, causing a loss o f mobility in his left hand’s forefinger and
middle finger. The effects o f this accident affected his serving;
he no longer had the same dexterity in that hand. However,
this did not separate him from “his altar,” as he loved to call it.
For too many years while in prison, he had been deprived o f
serving in the altar, and now that he was free, nothing could
stop him from showing his complete devotion and dedication
to the service he had been called by God to do.
The Romanian Revolution occurred in December o f 1989.
Fr. Arsenie was greatly impressed by the sacrifice o f the youth
who took to the streets, with chests bared, passing on to the
Romanian people the fruits o f their redemptive battle. This
moment was also the end result o f his sacrifice and the sacri
fice o f that segment o f his generation who fought intensely in
chains and prisons for the same desire: the country’s freedom
from the Communist yoke, which had attacked the nations
faith and being.
117
In a “ Word on the Revolution” he said: “ This grace-filled

revolution was not created only to conquer a powerful philoso
phy, but to bring all the people to their senses, for a country
does not exist for a philosophy, but the philosophy for the
country. I called it a grace-filled revolution because the good
God had endured for too long the paganism that previously
existed, and He filled the hearts o f the marvelous young people
with power and strength. They fought with no weapons, with
no scythe, hoe, or ax, but with their open breasts, so that the
faith in God resting in their hearts could be seen. Therefore,
God gave this victory and bestowed it upon their pure hearts.”
Fr. Arsenie knew that “the victor is not the one who strikes,
but the one who endures.”
The December 1989 Revolution put an end to the great
persecution inflicted by the Securitate on him. After decades
o f harassment, pressure, defamation, and both crude and subtle
disrespect, he was now, with the aid o f G od’s mercy, the victor.
He had proven himself to be a prudent, discerning, and watch
ful man, who understood the Securitate’s mode o f operation
and was able to defeat them at their own game.11 His entire
battle had been simply to convince the Securitate agents o f the
truth: that he was a true monk, priest, and spiritual father. The
result o f the constant surveillance, from his first arrest in 193S
to the Revolution in 1989, was an impressive compendium on
Fr. Arsenie, comprising “eight files in fifteen volumes, adding
up to over 3,500 pages.” 12
In 1990, at the age o f seventy-six, Fr. Arsenie traveled out
side Romania— not to see exotic places, but to visit two small
heavens on earth: the Holy Land and Mount Athos. While vis
iting a monastery on Mount Athos, one o f the monks was be
wildered by the fact that Fr. Arsenie was the spiritual father o f a
convent and asked him, “Father, do you also confess women?!”
11 a c n s a s , Informant file 185003, vol. 1, pp. 186-87.
12 Petcu, Părintele Arsenie Papticioc in docum entele Securităţii, p. 149.
A S E R V A N T T O A I.L
Hr. Arsenic (center) on Mount Athos.
“ When I heard him, I didn’t ignore him. [I said to him,]

‘Don’t be upset, but let me ask you: did “woman” suddenly ap
pear in the woods, in a tree?... Do vou know what womankind
is, if you speak in such a manner? Allow me to ask you: Who
created woman? You can only tell me the truth: God. But why
and how?’ (And 1 began to explain to him the significance
o f womankind.) ‘See where your sin lies: you abstain from
women, but you gossip about them. What do you know about
womankind, you who venerate the Mother of'God, the Protec
tress o f the Holy Mountain, who is also a woman?...’ I didn’t
keep silent; I didn’t give in. What do you think happened, to
my utter joy? W ho do you think was on the boat leaving the
Holy Mountain upon my departure? This father with whom
I had this conversation. He was being sent on obedience to
France, to a convent, and he was asking me about confessing
nuns. And I encouraged him.”
On one o f his journeys between monasteries on the Holy
Mountain, a man with some donkeys approached Fr. Arsenie’s
party from behind and gave the elder a note which said, “ Fr.
Arsenie from Romania: Get on this donkey and come to me.”
2.19
Fr. Arsenie was not known by anyone on the Holy Mountain,

nor did he know anyone except the fathers o f Prodromou Skete.
Upon his return home he recounted this event. Amazed, some
one asked him why he did not go to see the monk who had
summoned him. It was obvious this was a holy man, as he knew
his name and his location on the Holy Mountain. “I didn’t go,”
said Fr. Arsenie. “If I ’d gone, I ’d have stayed there for good.” If
he had followed this mysterious summons, it would have been
with his whole heart, experiencing with his entire being the
special grace o f the Holy Mountain. An unusual battle took
place in his heart in those days (as he confessed in a postcard
sent from the Holy Mountain to the Techirghiol Monastery).
His obedience, his mission, his fidelity to those entrusted by
God to his care again surpassed his longing for silence on the
Holy Mountain. He once again cut o ff his will; he was free but
fully aware that he was a soldier o f Christ.
After some years at Techirghiol, a certain individual began
causing Fr. Arsenie all kinds o f troubles, for the devil never
sleeps in places where war is declared against him. Later on Fr.
Arsenie commented: “These things happened so that I could
be further humbled. There are people to humble me here, too.
But I pretend not to see, so that the battle won’t cease: so that
I won’t be taken down from the Cross. We will conquer only
through the Cross.” He strove to go through these temptations
without losing his peace. “Obviously, we don’t give in, we don’t
remain stationary in life, we have to fulfill our duty— everyone
in the place where he is—we, the priests, through commemo
rations. Someone has said, A nation is preserved through its
spiritual fathers.’”
Fr. Arsenie’s mission soared above the machinations o f the
evil one. He was certain that “an institution, just like a nation,
exists through those who strive toward the heights, who remain
on the Cross without giving up!” He considered these tempta
tions catalysts for humility: “We, the people, live only by virtue
zzo
o f humility. Humility is the only way. Both we and the angels

need its power.”
Humility, tru e humility, as Fr. Arsenie would call it, was
the source o f all the gifts God had bestowed upon him, gifts so
essential for a spiritual father. From his humility sprang his love
o f neighbor, patience, meekness and, especially, discernment—
the one virtue that surpasses all the others (as St. Anthony the
Great says). This is the great gift Fr. Arsenie had received after
much prayer, asceticism, and suffering, but above all through
the mercy o f God. Discernment helped Fr. Arsenie in accom
plishing his extraordinary mission at Techirghiol. Guiding
people and sensibly counseling them was precisely the praxis
o f this special gift. Having himself such a balanced approach
to life, he urged the people to live their lives accordingly, to
remain on the “royal path,” to guard themselves from extremes,
for “the extremes are o f the devil,” as he would say.
Once he related, “I ’m refreshed when I read from the
Psalter.” Asked by a spiritual daughter which was his favorite
psalm, he recited Psalm 130: O Lord, my h eart is not exalted,
nor a re m ine eyes becom e lofiy. N or have I w alked in things too
g rea t or too m arvelous fo r me. I f I were not hum ble-m inded but
ex a lted my soul, a s one weanedfi'om h is m other, so w ouldst Thou
requ ite m y so u l...
Yet, the prayer Fr. Arsenie would say unceasingly was the
Jesus Prayer: Lord, Jesu s C hrist, Son o f God, have m ercy on me,
a sinner. God had given him the gift o f the prayer o f the heart.
Regardless o f his task— confessing or talking to people—his
heart continued to say the prayer. His prayer wouldn’t stop
even while he was asleep, I sleep, but my h eart keeps vigil (Song
o f Songs 5:1). When someone asked him how often the prayer
should be said, he replied, “Say it once and never stop.”
His ceaseless prayer, however, was a scrupulously kept secret:
he never said a word about this work o f his. W hen he would
counsel others concerning this prayer, he would humble himself,
2 .11
placing himself among beginners, saying, “For you and me, at our
young [spiritual] age, the important thing is to say it.” Yet, those
near him— even for a short while— sensed his unceasing prayer.
Once, one o f his spiritual daughters was quietly awaiting
with Fr. Arsenie the arrival o f a nun for Confession. At a cer
tain point the woman broke the silence, asking him something,
but he didn’t reply— as if he hadn’t heard her. Later the woman
asked him something else, but again she received no answer.
After the nun came and had Confession, the woman went into
his cell to say good-bye to him. Then she told him o f her be-
ilderment at not receiving an answer to the questions she had
nsed to him while waiting. Father told her, “ Well, if you asked
e at an improper m oment...” The woman had nothing to say
reply, understanding that he was engrossed in deep prayer
iat made him unaware o f what was going on around him.
A nun (who would help him in the altar) confessed that
iring commemorations at Proskomedia or during the Divine
turgy he would be so immersed in prayer at times that she
auld not dare to make the slightest movement— in order not
disturb the profound experience she was witnessing.
Father’s reflections on the great work of the prayer o f the
.„.art have been preserved. They are inspired by the Holy Fa
thers, other theologians and, o f course, his personal experience.
“It is not enough for you to have the prayer: we have to
become prayer, prayer incarnate. Every deed, gesture, or smile
is a hymn o f praise, o f sacrifice— a prayer.... We need, most im
portantly, people who experience the prayer, not people who
say prayers— more or less frequently. And who can really claim
that he or she is truly ‘advanced?’ We are all beginners in spiri
tual matters.
“The heart is not just emotions and feelings, but the whole
o f the human person. The heart is the first organ o f our identity.
The heart is our hidden being, our deepest inner person,’ and
more truly, that which cannot be attained except by sacrifice and
2.2.2
death. It is the center, not just o f our conscience but also o f our
consciousness, not just o f the soul but also o f the body, not just
o f the understandable but also o f the incomprehensible; more
succinctly, it is the absolute center. Understood like this, the heart
is much more than a material organ in the body. The physical
heart is an outer symbol o f the boundless spiritual potential o f
the human being, created in the image o f God and called to attain
His likeness. To complete the inner descent and attain true prayer
means to enter this absolute center.
“ We are called to descend, not from the mind, but with the
mind. The goal is not the ‘prayer o f the heart,’ but the ‘prayer
o f the mind in the heart,’ as the different forms o f understand
ing, including the reason, are gifts from God, and they have to
be used in His service, not rejected.
“ This union’ o f the mind with the heart means the restora
tion o f our fallen and fragmented being, the restoration o f our
original righteousness. The prayer in the heart is a return to
Paradise, a deposit for and an anticipation o f the age to come,
which in this age is never fully attained.
“ The Jesus Prayer helps us see Christ in every man and ev
eryone in Christ, it makes each one a man tor the others.’ The
path o f the Name is open, generous— not limited by rigid and
immutable rules. The prayer is work; to pray means to be at the
highest level o f engagement, and our breath becomes one with
the Divine Breath, Which sustains the universe.”
In April o f 1996 Fr. Teofil (Paraian)13 o f Brancoveanu
13 Archimandrite Teofil (Paraian) (19 19 -10 0 9 ) was the spiritual father

o f the Brancoveanu Monastery and one o f the great elders o f twentieth-cen
tury Romania. Blind from childhood, he graduated from the Theological In
stitute in Sibiu. W hile in high school he met Fr. Arscnie (Boca), from whom
he became acquainted with the Jesus Prayer. He was tonsured a monk only a
few months after he joined the monastery at Sambata de Sus, on April 1,1953,
where he remained until his death. Over thirty-five volumes o f his sermons,
dialogues, teachings, and memoirs have been published.— E d .
Monastery visited Fr. Arsenie at Techirghiol. They talked

at length about prayer, Confession, Holy Communion, and
salvation. Regarding Confession, Fr. Arsenie emphasized
a more lenient penance, following the counsel o f St. John
Chrysostom, “Do you want to give him years o f penitence?!
Heal his wound!” He desired to make the penitent aware o f his
sin and thus o f repentance. He said: “ In life there are accidents,
and here is where the spiritual father, penitence, a whole series
o f things come into place— this is how I receive and counsel
them. I want them to be encouraged by all means, whatever
grievous sins they might have committed.... The Savior was not
crucified just for a certain category o f sins, but for all that is
sin on earth. You just have to rise... My approach is to be more-
lenient, but to attack the sin in every possible way and to bring
the penitent to the position o f opposing it as well. If he opposes
it, he will proceed on the right path; the mercy o f God can
assist him on the path and then I come with absolution. This
work is a very delicate matter.”
A portion o f their dialogue on the certainty ol salvation is
presented below:
Fr. Teofil: Do you have the certainty that you will eternally
be in a good place [i.e., heaven]?
Fr. A rsen ie: I can’t say something like that, most venerable
Father! Please believe me when I say: “ I ’m the only one who
won’t be saved!”
Fr. Teofil: Do you believe this?
Fr. A rsen ie: Yes, but I have great hope!
Fr. Teofil: I f you have great hope, why do you speak in this
manner?
Fr. A rsen ie: The mind in hell and the hope in G o d !14
Without the grace o f God, our deeds don’t save us in any way.
14 Com pare the words spoken by our Savior to St. Silouan the Athonite:
“Keep thy mind in hell and despair n ot!”— T r a n s .
Z24
A SERVANT TO ALL
Fr. Teofil·. Right, but it’s impossible for God not to want to
save us!
Fr. Arsenic·. Yes, but I can’t impose conditions on Him!
Fr. Teofil·. Well, without imposing conditions ... God being
Love ...
Fr. Arsenic·. Most venerable Father, in all honesty before a
father confessor,15 I say, “ I’ll be saved because I have suffered ...
Fr. Teofil· I honestly tell you that I have the certainty I ’ll go
to the good, but not because o f my deeds!
Fr. Arsenic: I only hope!
Fr. Teofil: Well, I trust that if I hope ...
Fr. Arsenie: This isn’t an Orthodox position!
Fr. Teofil: Maybe I’m not Orthodox?
Fr. Arsenic: The truth is we are on no account saved only
by our deeds, without God’s mercy!
Fr. Teofil: Do you know what I’ll tell God when I stand
before Him: “ Lord Jesus Christ, Son o f God, have mercy on
me, a sinner!” I won’t say anything else!
Fr. Arsenic: I ’ve made a [burial] cross at Zamfira Monas
tery for myself, and I wrote on it: 'Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, forgive m e!’
Fr. Teofil: After living my whole life with God, I can’t imag
ine that He would ever tell me, “ I do not want you!’”
F r Arsenic: He loves us so much, and this gives me hope!
F r Teofil: Father, if we count on God’s mercy, we have no
reason to hesitate!
Fr. Arsenic: I don’t want us to count only on God’s mercy
without taking into consideration our life and deeds. The pro
cess o f salvation implies not just His mercy, but our deeds also.
If only He could find us on the path. My struggle is to be on
this path. We ought to be honest in our struggle!
Fr. Teofil: I don’t worry because I trust in God’s goodness !
Fr. Arsenic: I do worry, but I also hope!
15 Fr. Arsenie was unaware that his words were being tape-recorded at
the time.— E d .
US
et er ni ty in t h e m o m en t
Fr. Teofil: What you’re saying is extraordinary, tor God is

our Father!
Fr. Arsenic: Yes, but I can’t say I have the certainty o f salva
tion!
Fr. Teofil: But why can’t you say this?
F r Arsenic: If God allows me, I will say this on my death
bed: “Lord, I thank Thee for the blessing to die a monk!" I
continue to have the thought that my deeds are leading me to
hell. If God wants to save me, He can do it! But I can’t know
for sure that He forgives me.
Fr. Teofil: But I ’m certain He forgives us.
Fr. Arsenic: I do have hope in God! He even told St. Si-
louan: “Keep thy mind in hell, and despair not!” The world
doesn’t know yet how much God loves us, how “passionately
in love” He is with us!
Z l6
A SERVANT TO ALL
Fr. Teofil·. See how beautifully you speak!?

Fr. Arsenic: But I can’t say I’m certain. Only Catholics say
they have the assurance o f salvation. Our deeds don’t save us
without God’s grace, and grace only comes if there is true hu
mility. Can I say that I ’m humble?!?
The same year, Fr. Arsenie visited Sihăstria Monastery for the
first time in many years at the request o f his spiritual son, Monk
Marcu (Dumitrescu), for Confession. There he had a long-await
ed reunion with his co-struggler in the wilderness, Elder Cleopa.16
He spoke at length to the fathers there, who greatly benefited, be
ing encouraged by his optimism. “ Don’t give up!” he told them.
“N o matter how little you are, no matter how tired, you mustn’t
give up. For, I repeat, no misfortune means anything. Nothing is
lost as long as faith is established, the soul doesn’t surrender, and
you raise your head again! God forbid that you be sad! Don’t be
afraid! It’s true, one’s thought should be in hell and in hell only.17
But hope should be with God without ceasing, thinking that He
greatly loves us. Fathers, God is more intimate with us than we
are! When you think about this, you fill yourself with hope. But
our deeds, no matter how amazingly good, can’t save us. They
can’t erase anything. And, no doubt, we’re sinners, but with hope.
Hope— this is it.”
Fr. Ioanichie (Bălan)18—who knew Fr. Arsenie from Slatina
Monastery— told him: “I rejoice that you’re the same as when I
knew you in your youth, around 1951, when I used to see you.
You have remained the same: optimistic, free o f doubt, and full
o f joy. You imparted this to me also, as we, the Moldavians,
are more sensitive. When I was in the army, I ’d lament to your
16 See Appendix One for the complete transcript o f Fr. Arsenie’s conver
sation with Elder Cleopa.— E d .
17 Again a reference to the words said to St. Silouan o f M t. Athos.— E d .
18 Archimandrite Ioanichie (Bălan) (19 3 0 -10 0 7 ) almost single-handed
ly preserved much o f the information we have about the saints and righteous
ones o f twentieth-century Romania through his interviews with them.— E d .
2Z7
Left to right: Fr. Ioanichie (Bilan), Fr. Cleopa, and Fr. Arsenic, at Sihăstria
in 1996. This would be the final meeting of F.lders Cleopa and Arsenic.
Reverence and you’d always tell me, ‘Don’t be sad. Hr. loan! Do
this or do that....’ Throughout your life, you’ve been fearless,
possessing great courage in Christ.”
The fathers at Sihăstria even invited him to come and live
there. When Fr. Arsenie objected, “ But, Brother, what am I go
ing to do with my cell [at Techirghiol]?” the abbot o f Sihăstria
firmly told him, “ Father, we’ll take you and your cell, too!”
In reply Fr. Arsenie said: “Sihăstria is truly my monastery o f
obedience. I dream o f it day and night, but I have to say that
this is not due to my memories, but because o f the conditions
provided here for a peaceful life. Nevertheless, it would be a
terrible mistake to leave the battlefield [that is, the place where
God assigned him, Techirghiol], deserting, and therefore being
banished, so to speak. In the midst of people you have to be in
a state o f awareness, like in the wilderness!” He lived such a life
at Techirghiol: always in the midst o f a multitude o f people,
engaged in helping them, and, beyond this tumult, constantly
12.8
A SERVANT TO ALL
abiding in the peace o f his heart. His responsibility in shep

herding the throng o f people who sought his guidance was o f
greater importance than a possible flight to Sihăstria, in spite
o f his advanced age and its accompanying sufferings.
A ll kinds o f people sought him, both people who under
stood him and those who did not, those who received his
counsels and those who only used him. He would give a word
supported by much prayer, but if his listener would not receive
it, there was nothing more he could do. Here everyone’s free
dom o f choice came into play. Oftentimes a persons course o f
life would depend on that choice.
Obedience out o f love is the prerequisite o f a relationship
between a spiritual father and a spiritual child. Fr. Arsenie had
the gift o f giving a word— a mighty word, acquired through
“asceticism and prayer, vigilance o f the mind and heart, and
above all through humility and modesty. The great spiritual
fathers have always been known in Orthodoxy for their ‘gift
o f discernment.’ This was always the sign through which they
were recognized: by the way they gave answers to the problems
posed to them. An answer springing from the gift o f discern
ment is always the right one, the one that solves the problem,
the one that is not a word but medicine, a balm that heals,
transforms, changes— and thus brings the person to full com
mitment as never before. The gift o f discernment is always
joined to the gift o f prophecy.” 19 This instruction reveals its
power when the one asking for it listens carefully and tries
to put it into practice. Father became involved only where he
saw an opening from the one asking for a word: “ Many people
come to me and ask me what to do in the future, how to solve
their problems, how to behave. I am very reserved in such mat
ters, and I don’t say much. If I see the slightest impediment in
that particular matter I say nothing, I keep silent.”
19 Plămădeală, Tradiţie fi libertate, ţ ţ . i i o - n .
119
ETE RN ITY IN THE M O M E N T
On the other hand, there were people who trusted Fr. Ar-
senie wholeheartedly and received his word as from God. He
eagerly received such visitors and immersed himself in their
problems, and often labored for them to the point o f exhaus
tion. He would say: “I ’m bogged down: people come from
everywhere, everyone with his problems, and you have to im
merse yourself in everyone’s problems, in intimate difficulties.
Because I don’t battle on a single front, but on so many battle
fields, I fight with the sorrows o f so many people." He would
practically carry on his back those who listened to his counsels
and trusted in his aid. On one occasion, many o f his spiritual
children rushed to help him walk on the path from church to
his cell. Seeing this, he said, “They think they’re carrying me,
but they don’t realize that I ’m the one carrying them.” This
spiritual endeavor weighed heavily on the elder, but Fr. Arsc-
nie had the capacity to bear it. He had attained to the mea
sure o f Gospel love for others, the ability to appropriate their
sufferings as his own, to encompass “the souls o f his spiritual
children in his soul, their lives in his life.”20 However, this is
possible only if there is reciprocity in this relationship, only if
the spiritual child contributes his prayer, if he labors together
with his spiritual father. Fr. Arsenie would often say, “I ean do
nothing, regardless o f how much I pray, if you don’t pray, too.”
There were many young people who would come to Fr. A r
senie for Confession, especially after the Revolution o f Decem
ber 1989. Father was happy to see the rise o f a new generation,
growing before his eyes. Once, following a young person out o f
his cell after hearing his Confession, he told someone, “I don’t
have time to rejoice, to discover the spiritual beauty o f the
youth.” Fr. Arsenie had a special care for his spiritual children.
It was the genuine care o f a father.
20 I. Hausherr, Paternitatea fi îndrum area duhovnicească in R ăsăritu l

creştin (Spiritual fatherhood and guidance in the Christian east) (Sibiu: Dei-
sis Press, 1999), p. 14.
A SERVANT TO ALL
Fr. Arsenics cell at Techirghiol.
Once, a woman approached him after Vespers to tell him

her sorrow. He was tired and the woman did not really know
what she wanted. Later he said, “ They [people] exhaust you:
first with their insistence, then there is the vagueness o f the
idea they want to convey to you, and there is also a blind faith
in them that overcomes you, and then you try to manage. Spir
itual fatherhood is trying!” It was also difficult because Fr. Ar-
senie was already advanced in years, facing physical limitations
and human needs. People hardly comprehended this.
In the summer o f 1997 a young girl, only three or four
years old, was brought to visit the monastery. One morning she
went down into the courtyard o f the monastery and, arriving
in front o f Fr. Arsenie’s cell, she let go o f her grandmother’s
hand, saying, “ I’m going to kiss Father’s hand!” She entered
his cell under the longing eyes o f the people anxiously waiting
to go in. As usual, Fr. Arsenie was having breakfast at the end
o f the morning service, before hearing Confessions, when the
little girl visited him. The girl came out after kissing his hand,
and the people asked her curiously what Father was doing. She
replied simply, “Father is eating!" Fr. Arsenie enjoyed hearing
about this: “She gave them the appropriate answer. People for
get that we’re human, too.”
Once, a group o f architecture students visited him. The ac
companying professor asked him to give the students a word.
He told them, “Build from top to bottom!” This saying caused
■' great stir among them. A professor at that school used it as
:pigraph to one o f her books.
Another time, a village priest who would occasionally
fess to Father came to his cell. For a long time this priest
been troubled by an uncertainty regarding his personal
o f prayer. It was an important issue, but also delicate.
Confession began. However, the priest hesitated to ask
ut his uncertainty due to an unjustified sense o f embar-
ment. The end o f the Confession was drawing near, and
Arsenie said the prayer o f absolution. He accompanied
priest to the door, as was his custom. There, before the
o f the faithful waiting to see Fr. Arsenie, he kissed the
priests hand. He would do this to any priest who came to see
him, regardless o f how much the visiting priest opposed it....
This time, however, he firmly held the hand o f our priest,
who lifted up his questioning eyes to gaze upon Fr. Arscnie’s
countenance. With a bright smile Fr. Arsenie softly told him,
“And regarding that matter, you should do thus ...” H e pro
ceeded to set out the details o f the matter that had not been
discussed, and then offered a solution. The penitent eagerly
took in his words. Then, receiving a blessing, he proceeded
toward the gate o f the monastery, so joyful and relieved that
he barely touched the ground. Only after he arrived on the
road did he come to the realization that during Confession
he had knowingly avoided the subject and told Fr. Arsenie
nothing about the issue. Overwhelmed, he rushed toward a
Fr. Arsenic serving in the Sts. Peter and Paul Church, in the mid-1990s.
ETERN ITY IN THE M O M E NT
place where he could hide his tears from the curious eyes o f
the passers-by.21
Fr. Arsenie often gave his visitors one o f his drawings, which
were like his business cards or like bait, catching people who
truly sought something better, something more beautiful. Once
he received a copy o f a painting o f the Savior with His disciples
Luke and Cleopa on the way to Emmaus. He loved this paint
ing, and would say, “Personally, I have great reverence for this
event.” He admired the painter’s inspiration to portray stately
oaks lining the road to Emmaus in order to increase the mystery
o f the moment, even though the Holy Land lacks such trees.
He copied this painting, and gave it to his visitors with much
love, together with his enthusiastic explanation o f the work.
Fr. Arsenie greatly treasured spiritual peace and always
guided people toward it. He would say: “ I love to preserve my
spiritual peace. Waves from the world desire to trouble it, to
ruin it, but I fight mightily to keep my balance.” Or he would
advise his spiritual children thus: “ The world within you is
what matters. God is so far away, and yet there is nothing clos
er to man than God. Man can be a king or a beggar. A holy
man is God’s gift to the whole creation.” Spiritual peace is the
state o f the man mindful o f the fact that “God knows him.
You have to live the moment; if you live the moment you gain
eternity. Although you are weak, nevertheless, continue on the
path. There are also stones and potholes [on the way], but you
continue on the path.”
Because he would deny himself, putting the needs o f his
neighbor first, God would always give him strength— which
amazed many people. They would ask him, “ Father, how do
you survive ?” “I can feel my old age, I don’t have the same live
liness,” he would say. “ There is a rational explanation [for my
21 Priest Rarcş Bardu, “Testimonies,” O chii p rin care vedeam cerul: in

memoria pă rin telu i A rsenic Papacioc [The eyes through which I saw heaven: In
memory o f Father Arsenie Papacioc] (Bacău: C orgal Press, 1015), pp. 75-76.
2.34
A SERVANT TO ALL
endurance], but there is also the gift from Above. Not that I
have special gifts— then again, maybe I do. W ho doesn’t have
them?... I lived in spiritual and bodily purity. I ate a little so I
could survive. I was in prison, I suffered much, but now I have
delights, yet I pay for them. Look, I’m assailed by everyone
from the smallest to the greatest [he was about to confess the
president o f the country]. I’m assailed, but I delight in every
thing I do. I see everything as an ascetic effort for God. Look, I
wrote this upon my arising this morning: ‘What can you desire
more than for God to abide in you?!’ Truly, what more can
you desire?” The measure to which God makes His abode in
you is in direct correlation with your sacrifice, and Fr. Arsenie
knew it. “ I don’t have any time to be with myself. But why am
I complaining? I’m doing this for my salvation.”
During this period Fr. Ioanichie (Balan) visited him for
a second interview, published in his book Spiritual Talks. He
wrote about the elder’s life at this time: “ It is difficult to have
a long conversation with the tireless spiritual father ... Arsenie
Papacioc. He serves daily in the church, he regularly confesses
the nuns at the skete, there are spiritual children from near and
far who come for a profitable word, faithful with all kinds o f
problems, poor people who wait for alms, and people who de
sire to sec him only for a few moments. The door o f his cell
and o f his heart are open day in and day out. All want to see
him, to ask him for a word o f salvation, a prayer for health,
advice, a travel blessing.”22
22 Archimandritc Ioanichie Bălan, Convorbiri duhovniceşti [Spriritual

talks], voi. i (Diocese o f Roman and Huşi Press, 1990), p. 609.
2-35
C H A P T E R FIFT EEN
L A B O R I N G IN T W I L I G H T
ATH ER A r s e n i e did not regard old age as a burden, even
F when he was over eighty years old. He would often say, “ I

like old age. And I don’t worry. I’ve fought so much for this
old age: should I be sorrowful now?!”
Oftentimes his extraordinary labors would affect his health.
In loo o, on the Sunday o f Orthodoxy, he did not feel well after
the service. “Fatigue, many services, and there is my age, too.
But other than that I have no reason to complain, because,
look, I have to answer every question [that my visitors ask], and
I will be judged at the Judgment for these answers. And behold,
they’ve come to invite me to Galaţi.1 I told them: ‘My longest
journey is to the gate, and I don’t even do that.’ It snows, it
rains; I don’t know. Yesterday, when a nun told me that it was
snowing, I went to pull the curtain o f the window and look.
I ’m so busy that I don’t even pull open the curtain so I won’t
waste any time in pulling it back. I ’m a simple man. I’m just
not going to consider myself the hub o f the universe. Truly, I’m
honest. I ’m honest with myself, I’m honest when I meditate
upon my salvation, and I have an inner life now as well, sin
cerely reflecting on my soul.”
When asked if he was tired, Fr. Arsenie answered, “I ’m al
ways tired, but I wash my face with cold water and I ’m fine.
Nevertheless, I have a hidden joy that cannot be understood
rationally.” On another occasion he said: “I ’m well, but I ’m
1 One o f the major cities in the Dobrogca region, 136 miles from the
Techirghiol Monastery.— E d .
LABORING IN T W IL IG H T
exhausted. However, this does not invalidate my well-being.

I ’m enlisted, like a soldier. This means cutting o ff one’s will.”
A t night he would not rest well due to his health problems and
his constant care for his spiritual children.
He would do everything with love; thus, God sustained
him in his great endeavor. In a letter o f reply to one o f his
spiritual daughters, who had apologized for trying Father’s pa
tience with her problems, he wrote, “Don’t worry about my
patience, for it is not all alone: it’s accompanied by love, the
blessed love, that forgives all things, understands all things, be
lieves all things (cf. i Cor. 13:7). Such is the battle. It requires
sacrifice, constantly offered anew, and it greatly cherishes the
heart soaring aloft.”2
His self-sacrifice bore fruit. “Sacrifice— this is the essence
o f Christianity. You give up a pleasure, you offer up a sorrow, a
desire, so that there can be peace. In order to burn, the candle
offers the wick and the wax, and the vigil lamp offers oil. That’s
why candles are lit in church, to remind us o f sacrifice. One
cannot live without sacrifice; you have to give up something in
order to benefit from a situation. Peace is fourfold greater than
justice. If you make peace, you gain four; if you make justice,
you gain only one.”
This path o f sacrifice, although steep, is the easiest—even
if the mind contradicts it. Christianity is a land o f paradoxes.
“The way going uphill is easier than the one leading downhill,”
Fr. Arsenie said. “Because one o f man’s greatest mistakes is that
he runs away from the Cross, he flees suffering. The Savior says,
‘Take up your Cross and follow M e!’ (cf. Matt. 16 :14 ); He does
not say, ‘Take up the walking stick!’”
Fr. Arsen ie’s self-sacrifice profited all those who came to
him, causing them to undergo a change, smaller or greater, de
pending on the inclination o f their heart. Every meeting with
2 Archimandrite Arsenic Papacioc, Epistolc, p. 14.
137
Fr. Arsenie was an event. Those entering his cell overwhelmed

with cares would leave possessing wings. Many who visited him
revealed that they never perceived the passing o f time in Fr.
Arscnie’s grace-filled presence, as though it no longer existed,
so engrossed were they in this great encounter.
As a spiritual father, Fr. Arsenie would be lenient but also
firm, depending on the situation, according to the words o f the
Apostle: Reprove, rebuke, exhort (II Tim . 4 :1). “ I keep calm,
even though at times I raise the tone o f my voice. But this de
pends on the person, how self-willed he or she is.” Fr. Arsenie
was meek by nature, and every chastisement was nothing but
an assertion o f the grievousness o f the sin for the one chastised.
Love was Fr. Arsenie’s measure, and with love he would raise
from the depths o f the abyss the one fallen therein. Here, in
Confession, one could see his great gift o f comforting, support
ing and sustaining, encouraging, teaching, consoling, forgiving
seventy times seven (Matt. 18:21). Forgiveness, however, would
be conditioned by the repentance of the one confessing. One
day, in 2000, Fr. Arsenie said: “ In fifty years o f the priesthood
it has never occurred that I did not give absolution [at the end
o f Confession]. But now a woman came to me for Confession
and I could not give her absolution because I saw that she had
no desire to renounce that sin.” He was grieved because he
could not give her absolution, but he could not overlook her
lack o f repentance.
When he desired to counsel his spiritual children or to
bring their errors to their attention, out o f the goodness o f his
heart he would tell them a parable, a story about someone else.
“Yes,” he would say, “a girl”— or “a boy,” or “a woman”— “came
to see me,” as it were the case. If you paid attention, you under
stood that the one he was talking about was actually you, and
“that persons” situation was in fact yours, delicately described
by Fr. Arsenie in order for you to mend your ways.
“I wasn’t hard to please in my lifetime,” he would say. One
238
Fr. Arsenic’s cell at Techirghiol, preserved alter his repose.
o f his acquaintances who occasionally cooked for him remem

bered: “ Father ate whatever you gave him; he sat wherever you
placed him. If you didn’t give him anything to eat all day, he
wouldn’t get something to eat on his own.”
He advised everyone not to eat to satiety but rather to
feel they could still eat more when they left the table. At every
meal he would stop upon reaching this limit, and return the
plate with food on it.
Fr. Arsenie would take a few retreats during the year, after
major feast days. This would be his quiet time, but he would
use this freedom to help others. Having more peace, he would
pray more for his spiritual children. He would say, “I had time
to pray; I prayed for everybody.” He would also have a chance
to read more during these times. Once he said: “ I read a lot. I
read the life o f St. Basil the Great, and I was very impressed.
What courage, what battles he had to fight in preserving O r
thodoxy, and how little people nowadays know about him !”
He loved nature, especially the mountains. During his
13 9
mountain expeditions, his soul would greatly resonate at seeing

God’s creation. Contemplating it, he meditated on the great
truths, often paradoxes, o f the Faith. He would be fascinated by
the display o f a snowfall, sharing this joy with a spiritual daugh
ter in a letter: “It’s been snowing here for the past twenty-four
hours. It is a great delight and beauty. My soul is so joyful and
awed! I couldn’t wait to share with you this scene— silent, yet
full o f movement, with these white tiny snowflakes racing each
other and mingling so harmoniously, so quickly, so densely, and
soothingly.... You rush at them and they swarm around you
1 you don’t feel them, but in a moment you become as white
1 smooth and seamless vestment. They are victors without an
'ersary. They constantly descend without a break; everything
vhite, white, and everything is covered by about two and a
f feet. It’s so beautiful, and I didn’t doubt that they’d come.
:y came for me. I didn’t call them [the snowflakes]; thus the
'ard [of seeing them] is even greater.”3
Upon his return from his travels, he would bring sweets for
nuns, as a loving father. He would tell them, “Come, have
le chocolate!” And the nuns would fill his cell, full o f joy at
ng him again. During his absence from the monastery the
nuns would say, “It’s desolate without Father!” And this long
ing was reciprocal. He would say upon his return, “ I missed
you with a ‘child’s longing,’ for a child has no patience. An old
man doesn’t rush to return, but a child is impatient.”
Fr. Arsenie was very generous, in things seen and in those
unseen. Always calling attention to the virtue o f almsgiving, he
would be the first in striving to practice it, because “almsgiv
ing is one o f the great preparations for eternity; giving some
thing from yourself. Behold, the whole o f Scripture is mercy!
The H oly Gospel reading on the Sunday o f the Last Judgment
speaks only about mercy: ‘W hy didn’t you clothe Me? W hy
3 Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc, Epistole, p. 19.

didn’t you give Me to drink? Why didn’t you visit Me?...’ That
is, ‘W hy didn’t you have mercy, why didn’t you give alms?’ (cf.
Matt. 15:31-46). They say that mercy rose against justice, and
mercy triumphed.”
“ You don’t own what you possess, but you have what you
give. And you don’t give from what you have, but you give o f
yourself,” he would often say. “The poor are biblical figures;
they will never disappear from the face o f the earth. God al
lows poverty so that the rich can be saved through almsgiving.
The riches that one uses to give alms are not sinful. When you
want to give alms you have to go and seek the recipients. They
come to me lamenting, ‘Father, give to me, for I don’t have ...’
and I say, ‘Well, I know this one [wondering if he can trust
him]...’ But then I ponder, ‘What am I going to do if he’s tell
ing the truth?!’ And so 1 agree and give to them. I’ve always
given to them.
“God performs many miracles, but you’ll never see the
miracle o f God being a liar. If God said that He would give
a hundredfold in return to those who give alms, it’s true. And
if this doesn’t happen, it means that the one who gave wasn’t
honest; either he didn’t give wholeheartedly or he gave with a
hidden agenda.”
Fr. Arsenie helped many people in need. The young people
who could not afford to study found support in Fr. Arsenie
and became dedicated in their profession. In their secular ca
reers, they brought to society the spiritual fragrance obtained
from being close to Fr. Arsenie. He would financially assist all
the needy, irrespective o f their social level. He would first seek
them in prayer, and having found them he would help them.
Once he helped a hierarch who was in dire financial straits.
The hierarch recounted: “I had told Fr. Arsenie, among other
things, that our monastery had taken a big loan from the bank,
but we couldn’t pay it and were at risk o f losing the monastery.
The borrowed money had been used to build the monastery. I
2.41
Fr. Arsenie speaking with spiritual children.
stayed for a few days in the courtyard o f the monastery, wan

dering its pathways, immersed in my thoughts, when, one day I
saw Father coming toward me with a bag full o f money in his
hand, saying: "This is my funeral money. I ’m sure the people
will come to my bier, and I won’t remain without burial. Build
2 .4 2
the monastery with this money, and the monastery will never
have difficulties.’ This is one o f the multitudes o f times Fr. Ar-
senie gave, and gave o f himself, for he gave o f who he was, not
just o f what he had. Fr. Arsenie liked to say, “ It is not our daily
bread that is important, but the bread o f our neighbor— this is
what we have to attend to.”
It was Pentecost in 1998. A child urgently needed a surgery.
His mother could not afford it and asked Fr. Arsenics help.
A t the end o f the service Fr. Arsenie told the people: “ He is
our child, everybody’s child. Make haste so we can save a child!
Mothers, let us save a child!" Later on he recounted, “On no
other occasion, when I called upon people’s generosity, did we
collect as much as we did then, because we had recourse to the
soul o f a mother.”
Fr. Arsenie had a great love for his nation, but he also saw
that all peoples were connected through Christ. In Septem
ber 1998 an American nun visited Techirghiol, where she was
warmly welcomed by the elder, who gave her a word on Chris
tian unity:
“ For the living Christian world, there is no space. There is
no difference between America and Romania, between Techir
ghiol and ... Everyone is in one place joined in the same heart
beat. This separation that we live in is a great danger for every
individual in the sense that we are deviating from the responsi
bility we have to reach eternity. Everyone is always together in
the same place— everyone. We aren’t created only for ourselves.
We are created for the whole creation. Man, who is a small
world, a microcosm in which the macrocosm is reflected, is the
embodiment o f the whole creation in his seen and unseen be
ing. If the little finger is hurt, the whole organism suffers. And
so, that’s how all o f us should be— if one person is in pain, we
all suffer. That’s why it has been well said that we should weep
for the tragedy o f mankind as for our own sins. Therefore,
it doesn’t matter if I ’m in America or somewhere else. W hat
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matters is that we’re all present. And the present is repairing

the past and conquering the future. We’re concerned with liv
ing as we should in the present and leaving the future to solve
its own problems. It is important that we be whole now, that is,
that we be very careful about how we use time, especially this
very day, every moment. I’ve said it before: any second can be
“a time” and every sigh can be a prayer.... From a spiritual point
o f view, this is the most healthy and efficient advice: to live in
the constant presence o f God as much as you can. That is why
a moment can become a prayer. Even more than the prayer o f
the typikon with an empty heart.
“That is why I say: if we live—which is a great gift from
God—we aren’t living for the sake of developing our human
or philosophical knowledge. Philosophy is only created con
cepts. It doesn’t answer the big questions. The great philoso
pher Kant says, ‘There are two big things filling my heart with
admiration: the starry sky above and the moral law inside me.’
That is what Kant says. But we, monks especially, can grasp the
stars with our hands: not simply discussing their extraordinary-
movement and their balance and harmony, but actually touch
ing them. We are seizing them. That is who we are. Always in
the creation o f God.
“The greatest error is for one to isolate oneself. It is only
by living properly, by loving madly— absolute total love— that
sometime, somewhere we can truly be saviors.
“Therefore, if this is the situation, then every deed we per
form must be framed with sacrifice. The salvation o f every one
o f us is on the Cross. The Cross is the most praised object o f
the world, so by no means should we run away from something
like this [i.e., sacrifice]. We should prepare ourselves to accept it
and to be thankful that God gave us power to bear the Cross....
“Sacrifice is the supreme act o f every one o f us! G od cre
ated us not only for ourselves, but for others. This means
that He created us and we are all restored at Christ’s coming,
14 4
through His sacrifice. This made us one with Him. From the
moment He gave us the power to become gods by grace, we
arc one with Christ. Christ is by His nature God, and we are
gods by grace. You see that the possibility was given for us to
ascend to God as humans. And when we get there, we are as
big as God. But when we can’t do this, though we want it,
and G od comes to us, He is as small as we arc. G od makes
H im self humble for us. He who lived in the heaven above the
heavens (in the glory o f glories) has the pleasure o f living in
our hearts....
“G o with God. This you don’t say to everyone: Go as gods
wherever you go!”
The year 1999 began for Fr. Arsenie with a series o f respira
tory infections (bronchitis), which would continue to trouble
him, especially in the winter. He coughed a lot, which would
exhaust him physically. He was able to keep the illness in check
with medical treatment, but the multitude o f people assailing
him was unmanageable. If people could not come in person,
they would call, asking him to solve their troubles. Then there
would be television crews coming with all their gear to film
him. This would exhaust him, but he would not refuse them.
Oftentimes the respiratory infections would recur, being
followed by medical treatments combined with doctors’ in
structions not to serve in church tor certain periods o f time—
orders he had to obev. Returning to the Holy Altar and to
hearing Confessions after a period o f suffering, he would say, “I
have risen from the dead!” He would return to fasting, starting
again his journey o f salvation: his personal salvation and that
o f those under his spiritual guidance. When a faithful man
called him asking if he could come for Confession, Fr. Arsenie
told him, “Come, I’ll be here till my dying day.”
One day, in Confession, a spiritual son felt compassion on
him and said, “Father, this cough doesn’t give you a break.” Fr.
Arsenie replied: “Brother, you know that St. Paul had an illness
14 5
E TE RN ITY IN TH E M O M E NT
and kept on praying for healing, and he didn’t receive healing.

God told him that He would not heal him because M y strength
is made perfect in weakness (II Cor. 11:9). And this applies to all
mankind.”
During these periods o f illness, he had to travel to Bucha
rest on different occasions for tests and treatments. One winter,
he had to go to Bucharest, but the police had closed the road
from Constanta to Bucharest due to a heavy snowfall. The day
before the trip the driver went to see him and explained to him
the situation, asking him what they should do. Fr. Arsenie be
lieved they had to go, as they could not postpone it. He asked
the driver, “Aren’t you afraid?” The driver replied, “ No, Father,
I’m not afraid if I’m traveling with you!” And they decided to
leave the next day. The following day the weather was clear.
There were no other cars on the road to Bucharest. The road
was indeed covered in snow. There were roadblocks at different
points, near bigger cities. At each o f these, the driver would
stop, get out o f the car, move them to the side, and continue
on. They arrived safely in Bucharest and dealt with the urgent
problem.
On July 30 o f the same year (1999), Fr. Arsenie was given
the distinction o f honorary citizen o f the city o f Techirghiol.
He worthily received this honor, as he had already sanctified
through his deeds the “place” entrusted by God to his watch.
And the place, Techirghiol, was renowned by now, not so much
for the physical healing (the clinics around the lake with heal
ing properties were well known), but especially for the spiri
tual healing in the spiritual “clinic” o f Fr. Arsenie. Although
a good number o f its citizens were Muslim Turks and Tatars,
they were not timid in coming to his cell when life’s difficulties
would come upon them. They knew that there they would find
a profound word, a word o f comfort. Fr. Arsenie would receive,
counsel and commemorate them at Akathists. Some o f them
embraced the Orthodox Faith and were baptized. Later, those
14 6
who received his help came to his grave, thanking him and wit
nessing to the benefactions bestowed upon them.
From the time o f his arrival at Techirghiol, the monastery
hosted annual courses on the subject o f religious tours. Monas
tics, hierarchs, professors, theologians, and scholars cook part
in these conferences. Once he participated in the opening cer
emony, which presented talks on diverse matters regarding the
ecclesiastical arts. At the end Fr. Arsenie told them: “I ’ve noted
that you discussed iconography, architecture, proportionality....
But why don’t you talk about the spirit o f the monk who has
to be present in all these things?” And then he began to speak
to them about the remembrance o f death, about salvation.
After dinner, the monks present for the courses would
gather in front o f Fr. Arsenic’s cell, and he would come out and
talk to them until midnight. All o f them desired answers and
encouragement regarding the great path to salvation. Com
pletely engaged in their spiritual formation, Fr. Arsenie would
forget himself, and when a nun would finally escort him to his
cell he could barely walk because o f his swollen legs. The joy
radiating from his face was his satisfaction that he had placed a
rock at the foundation o f these souls.
Fr. Arsenie recalled a conversation from one o f these con
ferences: “Someone asked me, ‘Father, now there are two or
three great spiritual fathers in our country, but what are we go
ing to do when you’re no longer among us ?’ He was placing me
at the top.
“I replied, ‘Why do you put my death first? Aren’t you a
spiritual father? Why do you place me at the top?’
“He said to me, ‘Father, this world is getting worse and
worse.’
“And I told him, ‘Don’t think about the world; focus on
becoming perfect. If you want to focus on the world, you must
first strive to become perfect in order to solve the problems
o f the world.” At a similar discussion he said, “You have to
147
be aware o f the fact that the tribulations o f the world are also
caused by you. Your sins negatively affect the whole o f human
ity.”
Fr. Arsenie did not agree with excessive theorizing about
the Faith, about the teaching on salvation. He always took the
most practical approach available for the faithful. “ Theoretical
knowledge is gained everywhere, but no progress is attained.
The Orthodox Church does not push harder on the pedal
o f theoretical knowledge, but rather on the pedal o f ‘experi
ence.’ One can see that through experience you gain abundant
knowledge, and you don’t know its source. Theologians come
to be refreshed by the fervent ones, who are simple accord
ing to the judgment o f men; they don’t have much theoreti
cal knowledge, but are continuously in the presence of God. If
the branch [of the Vine] asks for abundant life, it will be be
stowed upon it abundantly. For the Savior says, / am the Way,
the Truth and the L ife (John 14:6). If there is no way, there is
no ascent; if there is no truth, there is no knowledge; if there is
no life, there is no living.”
He never turned away the numerous pilgrims coming by
buses from different parts o f the country to receive his blessing.
He talked to them about the remembrance o f death, about love
o f neighbor, and about slander— a sin so common and so easily
committed, leading to the torment o f many souls in hell, as Fr.
Arsenie would say.
In teaching people, he emphasized another provision for
living an authentic Christian life; love o f enemies. He consid
ered that people theorized about this virtue more than they
put it into practice. As one who had practiced love o f enemies
and tasted the spiritual joy and freedom it brings even from
childhood, he would tirelessly urge the attainment o f it. “ Love
o f enemies is a commandment, not a suggestion. Strive to truly
love your enemies, regardless o f the state you find yourself in. If
you’re unable to love them from the beginning, at least try not
to hate them. God rejoices. God will help you if you always
persist as a beginner in this virtue. And if death comes, it finds
you fighting to love your enemies, and God does the rest. The
important thing is for you to be on the path."
In October o f zooo, Fr. Arsenie had an accident, falling on
some steps and breaking six teeth. “All o f a sudden I felt my
mouth filling up with my teeth,” he would later recount. The
doctor treating him was exhausted after spending six to eight
hours on the first day, extracting the nerves, while the elder pa
tiently tolerated the pain without saying a word. Upon finish
ing her work, the doctor said, “ I’ve never seen a man endure
so much pain.” Such work would be done usually during the
span o f a few days, even weeks. Afterwards, Fr. Arsenie admit
ted that he had suffered terribly during the procedure. And be
cause it was through suffering that he had received the great
revelations o f his life, he then said, “On this occasion I got to
know myself better."
During his last years at Techirghiol he began to suffer from
disorders o f the prostate. In December o f the year 1000 he ex
perienced his second prostate blockage in a decade. One night
he felt very poorly and was taken to the hospital, where he un
derwent surgery, enduring this suffering, together with che in
herent humiliations o f the procedure, tor “suffering is not com
plete if it is not accompanied by humiliation,” as he would say.
Although he had stated that after this surgery he would
have a lighter schedule, this did not happen. He would serve
in the morning and then hear Confessions until the afternoon,
thus having no time to rest. At night he would sleep until
about i a.m., only dozing off a little before daybreak. Nonethe
less, in the morning he would be joyful, saying: “Seeing I was
awake, I told myself I should endure and not get annoyed.” He
would not spare himself at all, even now at the venerable age
o f eighty-seven.
Fr. Arsenie’s heart burned with love for God’s creation. As
14 9
he lovingly cared for the people, he did not ignore the animals
either. He had studied them from childhood, learning from
their behavior, and now he would be attentive to them when
ever an opportunity arose. However, he did everything with
discernment, as their master; he disagreed with some peoples
extremism—who went from being the masters o f animals (in
vested by God) to becoming their slaves.
When he first arrived at Techirghiol he sometimes went for
a walk on the pathway in front o f the monastery. A blind dog
began to accompany him on his stroll. Once, a mastiff attacked
Fr. Arsenie, but the blind dog placed itself between the mastiff
and Fr. Arsenie, protecting him from its fury. Fr. Arsenie was
very touched by the dog’s act, its courage and loyalty, despite
its physical handicap.
“I don’t think I ’ve missed asking anyone in Confession if
he or she had tortured or killed animals,” he would recount.
“Once it was raining and a cat with four kittens came by my
cell. Having no place for shelter, the cat went by the well next
to the cell and stood there mewing in the rain. During the
night I pondered, ‘How is it that 1 ask everyone in Confession
if they have tortured animals, and I ’m going to leave the cat
in the rain?!’ And I went through the dark and the rain and I
found the cat, but only three kittens; the fourth one was miss
ing. Can you imagine?... The next day I found myself with the
cat at the altar: it had come to thank me.”
Another time he was walking on the beach by the sea and
found an ailing seagull. “I touched it, but what could I have
done? I was leaving ...” he said, lamenting his inability to help
it. This was his heart, always burning with love and compassion
for the whole creation.
He would delight in seeing baby animals and birds. Occa
sionally, one o f the nuns would bring him a chick or a kitten,
and he would rejoice like a child.
In the fall he would always bless the flocks o f birds ready
Archimandrite Arsénié Papacioc.
for their long and difficult migration. In April o f Z 0 1 4 , almost

three years after Fr. Arsenies repose, a group o f his spiritual
children had come from afar to visit his grave. Hearing birds
clattering their bills, they lifted up their gaze and saw a flock o f
storks flying in circles above his grave, probably just returning
home. After a few circles in the air, they landed and stood in a
V shape and then flew off, continuing their journey.
In the summer o f zooz, Fr. Arsenies health declined again.
He was hospitalized with water in his lungs, heart fibrillation,
and all their side effects. He said to one o f his spiritual chil
dren, “I’m here because o f my sins.” But his disciple replied,
“Well, Father, for our sins.” “Yes, Brother, I don’t contradict
you,” he acknowledged. He was released three weeks later, but
he had lost over twenty-five pounds. He would not allow him
self to break the fast when he was ill, despite the insistence o f
the nuns that he eat something more substantial to gain some
strength. During his recovery he did not serve or hear Confes
sions; he only read commemoration lists in his cell and prayed
for those gathered at his door. He greatly missed serving, but
he knew he needed to recover before he could return to the
church.
His health issues were quite severe, as he admitted on his
release from the hospital; “I thought I would die, and I didn’t
feel I was ready for it— not that I hadn’t kept the command
ments, but because o f the gifts God has given me. It’s about
those talents that God generously bestows. But I ’m active too;
I don’t give up.”
During Father’s recovery, a priest came to the monastery to
do daily services. In the fall, when the priest was absent for a
time, Father served— barely taking note o f his instructions to
serve only on Wednesdays and Fridays. He paid even for this
effort, as dizziness bothered him for some time.
During the Nativity Fast he was invited, together with
other Orthodox and heterodox monks, abbots, and bishops, to
Z 5Z
the presidential palace in Bucharest. The president desired to

award them accordingly for their spiritual and cultural efforts.
A t the grandiose ceremony Fr. Arsenie received a medal and a
certificate for his “tremendous contribution in preserving and
nurturing the spiritual values o f the Romanian people.” When
asked what he was reflecting on in those moments, he said, “ I
was praying that all those present would free themselves from
the desire o f praise, o f glory.”
At the banquet following the ceremony, Fr. Arsenie sat
across from a Roman Catholic bishop who talked uninterrupt
edly. At one point the bishop addressed Fr. Arsenie, “But aren’t
you going to say anything?” Fr. Arsenie replied, “A word passes
with the wind, but silence speaks immensely.” Measured speech
is a distinctive characteristic o f a spiritual father.
A similar incident occurred when he participated at a
gathering o f all the spiritual fathers and abbots from the Me
tropolis o f Muntenia and Dobrogea, at Radu Vodă Monastery
in Bucharest. At the meal following the discussions someone
said with astonishment, “ Father, you said nothing at the meet
ing!” “ I ’m amazed you haven’t heard a thing,” he replied, “for
I ’ve been talking the whole time, even loudly.” (Fr. Arsenie had
been praying unceasingly.) Then, at the request o f the bishops
and the abbots, he spoke on the topic o f monastic struggles,
bringing benefit and joy to all those present.
At the beginning o f 1003, Fr. Arsenie was feeling well. Ev
ery time he would go into the courtyard o f the monastery he
would fill the pockets o f his ryassa with sweets, because the
children receiving treatment at the nearby clinic would come
to get his blessing. He would personally give each o f them
some sweets.
Little children amazed him with their purity and inno
cence. Once he was talking with a young mother while playing
with her two-year-old daughter. He explained to the mother,
“ You see, I live in this world o f beauty and feel the need [to
*53
encounter a soul filled with beauty— like that o f a child].” A n

other time he was playing with a baby and said, “You’ve de
feated me! I fight with the whole world, 1 fight with demons,
but you [the children] have defeated me.”
During Great Lent o f 1003, he was invited to lecture at
a conference in Constanţa. Hie day before the event he was
pensive, reflecting on how this conference would turn out. He
said: “All kinds o f people will come, some out o f curiosity,
having nothing to do with religion. The important thing is to
create the proper atmosphere there. It’s one thing to speak to
some theologians on a particular issue and another to address
so many people. But I leave myself to the mercy o f G od — may
be He’ll give me the grace to do it.”
Three thousand people were present at the conference. Fr.
Arsenie was able to engage the audience, speaking for hours,
while the people drank in his words. The lecture hall was over
flowing with people, while more watched him speak on large
video screens placed in the hallways. In concluding his lecture,
he said: “The Truth, Who is Christ, is the Touchstone; every
thing revolves around this Truth. All kinds o f philosophies,
trends, and ideas have appeared trying to combat this Truth,
but they do not bring anything new except a new vocabulary,
new words. Nonetheless, they clarify nothing, because the
Truth o f Christ is absolute and they do nothing else but attack
this Truth.”
In the spring o f the following year, 10 0 4 , he became ill
again, spending Pascha in the hospital. While confined there,
he said: “Since August 1964, when the Communists released
me from prison, I ’ve always celebrated Holy Pascha at the
monastery. Now I ’m in the hospital. But I won’t murmur if
this is the will o f God.”
During his stay in the hospital there was a drought in the
region, and a procession with the relics o f St. Gregory o f De-
capolis— brought from the Bistriţa Monastery— was organized
2-54
to beseech God for rain. The relics were also brought to the
hospital. That morning he refused to eat— something he need
ed to do before taking his medication. “How is it possible?
The saint is coming to visit me and I’m going to eat?!” And he
did not eat. It was April 19. Four days later, on the Feast o f St.
George, Fr. Arsenie was released from the hospital.
Two weeks later he had to have more tests, followed by a
month o f treatment in a pulmonic physiology clinic. Fifty-sev
en years had passed since he had left for the monastery, leav
ing his ill brother in the same hospital and reflecting, “I don’t
think I ’ll sec him alive again.” And thus it had happened.
Now, on his way to Bucharest, he was thinking, “W ill I look
back and say the same thing also?!” Nonetheless, he was opti
mistic: “I continue to believe this saying: God always follows
us; nothing happens without a specific reason.” God rewarded
his faithfulness. He spent the Feast o f the Ascension o f our
Lord in the clinic, and was then sent back to the monastery.
After his release another patient was brought and placed in his
bed. To the doctors’ astonishment the new patient was healed
very quickly.
After two months away from the monastery, Fr. Arsenie
was looking forward to his return, but the doctor told him,
“ Father, you will not make it if you go and receive even two
people daily!” He needed time to recover. He had lost almost
thirty pounds during this period. “I don’t regret it, for I’ve al
ways been thin, but the doctors told me that it was no joke,” he
said after his release.
On his return to Techirghiol on July 11, he resumed his
usual schedule, as though nothing happened. People flocked
to him, and he could not refuse them. He both served in the
church and received people for Confession.
In October Fr. Arsenie decided to make a trip. “I ’d like to
go to Bistriţa to thank St. Gregory. Can you believe it? Not
just thanking a [mere] man, but giving thanks to a saint!” He
155
went and venerated the saints relics, giving thanks for the aid
received while hospitalized. During this difficult journey he got
sick and was hospitalized in critical condition at Râmnicu Vâl
cea. For the first three days the doctors were very concerned.
Then he began to improve slowly, and a few days later he was
released from the hospital, fully recovered. He would say, “God
has always helped me.”
The Nativity Fast began after his return home, and his
schedule o f Confessions was very full. His legs would swell due
to the fatigue. Although his heart was not functioning nor
mally (due to his age) and any extra effort or even a cold could
bring about his hospitalization, he did not worry about any o f
these things. The nuns would fret, “ Father, don’t exhaust your
self so much! You’re ninety years old: you can’t work like you’re
thirty.” And he would reply, “I can’t live without the spiritual
joy this work brings me.”
Fr. Arsenic would impart to those who sought his coun
sel his conviction that all things are done according to G od ’s
will— a balm for very deep wounds. A pious doctor who
founded a hospice for cancer patients o f various ages in Bu
charest came to Fr. Arsenie with the difficult question he often
had to face from suffering families, “ Why is this happening to
such young ones [who die from cancer]?” Fr. Arsenie replied,
“Tell them that God takes people at the moment when they
have the greatest chance o f salvation.” The answer edified the
doctor and must have brought peace and confidence to those
deeply affected by the unseasonable loss o f their beloved ones.
During this time there was a major campaign against bird
flu in Romania. Doctors would constantly wear surgical masks
to protect themselves against it. Some people would even wear
them on the street. A doctor advised Fr. Arsenie to wear one
also, being vulnerable because o f the great number o f people
coming to see him. “Doctor, how am I going to wear a mask
when I always tell the people to take their mask o ff [that is,
to be honest] ?” And he did not wear one. Father’s encourage

ment, “ Take off the mask!” was a call to sincerity, to know
ing your own self. He had this gift o f perceiving the “mask” on
peoples faces, a sensitivity he had acquired through a remark
able spiritual life.
In early 1006, Fr. Arsenie began to experience weakness in
his legs. The tests revealed the cause: a herniated disc needing
surgery. He was now ninety-two. Although anesthesia was a
great concern for the doctors, everything went well. “ I wasn’t
afraid I wouldn’t survive the anesthesia. [Throughout my life]
I ’ve been a good boy, I wasn’t self-indulgent, I didn’t smoke.
I didn’t get married, and I knew I had a virginal body.” The
surgery was a success.
Prayer and his faith kept him alive— not just at that mo
ment, but also during his decades o f imprisonment, when he
learned that death is a reality we cannot escape, for “life is a
continuous death.” It is just a matter o f our approach to it, for
we must “know how to die and to arise every day.”
After his surgery, he could no longer serve in church, and
he lost his former balance when walking. It was time to say
farewell to his beloved altar. One day during Great Lent he
went to church to show the substitute serving priest the order
o f the Liturgy of the Pre-Sanctified Gifts. One o f the nuns in
church questioned him, “Do you miss the Holy Altar, Father?”
“ Don’t provoke me!” he replied. This was for him too mystical
to become a subject of discussion.
During the months following the surgery Fr. Arsenie felt
relatively well, having pain in his right leg—which improved
through physical therapy and walks in the courtyard o f the
monastery. In a phone conversation, his spiritual son (who
was also his spiritual father), Fr. Gavriil o f Zamfira Monastery,
asked him about his well-being. Fr. Arsenie replied, “Look, I ’m
ready to go through the tollhouses, but there’s a leg here stop
ping me.”
157
In May o f 1008 the Belt o f the Mother o f God was brought

from Greece to Romania for veneration. Having great rever
ence for the Mother o f God all his life, Fr. Arsenie went to
Constanţa to venerate it. Born on the Feast o f her Dormition,
he lived his life under her guidance, praying to her from his
youth and encouraging others to dare to ask for her mercy. He
would say: “ The Mother o f God is grieved by all those who
ask nothing o f her. She is openhearted toward those who, out
o f carelessness or ingratitude, rarely run to her. But how much
more generous will she be toward those who unceasingly beg
for her aid? These are not only beloved o f her, but are even
served by her.”
By God’s providence he was able to serve the last thirty-
five years o f his life at Techirghiol, a monastery dedicated to
LABO RING IN T W IL IG H T
the Mother o f God. He always honored her with reverence

and understood, with great humility, her maternal love for all
mankind. “ I believe that the Mother o f God is more at home
among the sorrowful, the weak, and all manner o f the perse
cuted, than in the company o f angels. The Mother o f God is
continuously sacrificing herself, constantly suffering, and I be
lieve she even engages in defending the ailing who call on her
for help before the divine throne. She loves beyond imagina
tion and without discrimination even the wicked and the care
less.” Fr. Arsenic told those present at the veneration o f her
Belt, “My beloved, the Mother o f God is so perfect that we can
only say to her, ‘Forgive us, for we are unable to understand
thee, but we love thee!’ If I desired to live longer, at this old
age— I ’ll be a hundred in six years— I would want to live only
to love the Mother o f God.”
During that summer Fr. Arsenic would go on walks on the
pathway behind the monastery every day. In the course o f these
walks, he decided he wanted to be buried between the spring
and the monastery’s fence near the road (his wish was fulfilled
after his repose). He would show those he encountered along
the way the place where he desired to be after the great passing.
“ Look, there,” he would say.
Previously, he had chosen a different burial place, at Zam
fira Monastery, where Fr. Gavriil was serving. There were two
plots prepared for Frs. Arsenie and Gavriil next to each other
in the monastery’s cemetery, with two identical white marble
crosses. On Fr. Arsenie’s cross was inscribed, “Jesus, Jesus, Je
sus, forgive me!” and Fr. Gavriil’s read, “Lord Jesus Christ, have
mercy on me!” Since Fr. Arsenie could not be separated from
Techirghiol even after his death, they took a blessing from each
other to relocate their burial sites, Fr. Arsenie having his resting
place at Techirghiol.
On August 15, 1008, Fr. Gavriil fell asleep in the Lord
unexpectedly. On receiving the sorrowful news in his cell, Fr.
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E TE RN ITY IN TH E M O M E NT
Arsenie asked to go outside for a while, “to comfort myself.”

The news o f his friends departure troubled him, as Fr. Gavriil
had possessed a sincere, obedient, and understanding heart— he
was someone he could always rely on. Later he said, “I greatly
regretted losing him, but I want to have a positive attitude re
garding God’s decision to do this. Personally I ’m quite at peace
because if the good God desires, he will wait for me.”
Although Fr. Arsenie was nearly ninety-seven years old, he
continued to be extremely vigilant and to sincerely meditate on
his salvation—living a life o f careful scrutiny o f the past and ap
preciation o f the present, thus caring for the future. He would
reflect on the tollhouses, from which not even great saints like
St. Mark o f Athens,·* who lived on Mount Tarmaqa (or Thra
ce), were exempt; he was delayed at the tollhouses lor about an
hour. Fr. Arsenie saw that this impediment of an extraordinary-
saint was due to the sins o f omission, “meaning the good you
could have done and did not do.” He would also contemplate
these sins, now that he was awaiting the final examination o f
his life, for which he had prepared tirelessly. He said, “ I often
ponder, ‘How should I live so that I may also escape these toll
houses?!’”
In February o f 2.011 Fr. Arsenie suffered a urinary obstruc
tion and was hospitalized in Constanţa. He was greatly weak
ened by the loss o f a large quantity o f blood, barely able to
speak. Gradually his situation improved with the help o f the
doctors and, obviously, by the will o f God. He recovered com
pletely and everything seemed fine. But Fr. Arsenie knew his
end was drawing near. He told one o f his spiritual children,
“That’s it, it’s finished. My life is drawing to an end.” He re
turned to the monastery after three weeks in the hospital.
However, only a few weeks later he began to lose blood again,
and he was hospitalized. In May he returned to Techirghiol,
4 t ca. 400, commemorated April 5.— E d .

where he remained bedridden. Only he knew the intensity o f

his suffering. During Great Lent he had confessed his spiritual
children, and he was able to spend Pascha at the monastery.
During the following two months, his last ones, he became
weaker and weaker, hardly talking. He would say with diffi
culty, “ You understand, I would like to say so much, but I can
not.” Despite his condition, he received people for Confession
until his last day. With the little strength he had, he would
say the prayer o f absolution in a slow whisper, barely able to
pronounce the words. Sometimes the nuns would bring him
outside to sit on a little stool by the door, and he would bless
the people.
A few days before Fr. Arsenie’s falling asleep in the Lord,
one o f the nuns had to leave the monastery for a short period.
She went to get his blessing and he asked her, “ But when are
you returning?” Then the nun understood that his days were
ending, and she asked him, “But when does your Reverence say
that I should return?” “ Return on Monday!” (July 18, 2.011).
She came back on Monday afternoon and went to see him. It
was the eve o f his departure to the Lord. From his bed Fr. Ar-
senie motioned her to move to his side and told her, “Make
room for the young man to pass.” The nun turned to see if
someone was behind her, but she saw no one.
The next day, Tuesday, July 19,2.011, was the eve o f the Feast
o f the Prophet Elijah the Tishbite. The day began as usual, like
all others. Fr. Arsenie’s last moments were in keeping with his
entire life, discrete and humble. He awoke, had breakfast, and
then began to feel ill. Seeing that he was not well and that his
breathing had become strained, the nuns called for an ambu
lance, but there was no need. The time had come: the sacrifice
was now complete, and the candle had burned to its end. He
had offered everything up; his last drop o f blood, his last bit o f
strength. Only now had “his time come.” He might have said
in his depths, as he had often exclaimed as his desire, “Lord,
161
The funeral procession o f Fr. Arsenic.
I’m happy I ’m dying a monk!” He gave up his spirit swiftly, in

a breath, at n a.m., at the age o f ninety-seven.
It was the will o f God for him to repose in his cell, on his
bed. The fathers at the monastery were able to prepare him ac
cording to the monastic rule. The ruling bishop, His Eminence
Archbishop Teodosie, came and carried out the customary
prayers.
The news o f his departure spread rapidly, bringing sadness
to those receiving it, but also a deep hope that there would be
a fervent intercessor for them before the throne o f God, as he
had promised: “If God will be my Helper, I will keep watch
over your hearts from the Highest, too.” As someone said dur
ing those days: “I weep, but my heart is rejoicing. We’ve lost a
spiritual father, but we’ve gained an intercessor in heaven.”
Although the Holy Synod o f the Romanian Orthodox
Church was in session in Bucharest on Thursday, July 11, io n ,
the day o f Fr. Arsenie’s funeral, four hierarchs— his spiritual
children— together with numerous members o f the clergy,
z6z
Fr. A r s e n ic in r e p o s t .
were present. Over ten thousand people came to pay their last
respects to the one who had shepherded them with such love
and care along the path to salvation. While still among the liv
ing, the elder had once seen himself in a vision, being lowered
into the grave. Commenting on this, he said, “How good it is
to have done something well [in your life, by God’s grace], to
have sacrificed yourself.” This multitude o f people, those pres
ent and those who for a worthy cause were present only with
their heart at his funeral, were his confession and his witness.
The rain, at times quite heavy, stopped toward the end o f
the service, and the sun appeared when his body was taken in
procession to the cemetery. It seemed that heaven had opened
its gates to receive Fathers soul. This day summed up his entire
earthly journey, full o f trials, but with a bright end— the re
ward received from Christ.
Fr. Arsenic s grave at Techirghiol. Inscribed in Romanian are the words:
“Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, forgive me.”
Fr. Arsenie often liked to repeat this story, a dialogue with

a leaf. This conversation is a fitting epitaph for the elder, es
pecially if we bear in mind that the Savior— the Rose— stood
next to him in prison:
“A leaf is asked, ‘Are you a rose?’

“‘No, not at all. I’m a leaf!’
“‘No, you’re a rose!’
“‘No, I’m not!’
“‘Yes, you are: you smell like a rose!’
“‘No, I ’m a leaf but I once lay beside a rose.’
Elder Cleopa (Hie).
APPENDIX ONE
A F IN A L V IS IT W IT H E L D E R
CLEO PA
I
N 1996 F r . A r s e n i e visited Sihăstria Monastery and talked
with the monks, answering their questions. Here is part o f
his conversation with Elder Cleopa, after he had spoken with
the monks for a few hours.
Fr. Cleopa: Fr. Arsenie, my dear, my greatest joy is that I see
you here! The mercy o f God adorned you with patience, with
the grace o f the priesthood, and with this lovely beard! Behold,
the Lord preserved you until now! You’re eighty-two or eighty-
three years old! O Lord, you’ve given me such a great joy! I’ve
heard you’re exceedingly busy!
Fr. Arsenie: Yes, Father! But I said, “ Without a doubt, I’m
going to Sihăstria!” Back at my monastery, I have this stressful,
rather difficult problem: there’s no one to take my place! I ap
pealed to the patriarchate and they sent a young hieromonk.
H e’s staying there until I return.
Fr. Cleopa: Stay longer, dear, stay longer! Now, that we’ve
met, by the mercy o f God, let me tell you about myself. I ’m
sick and old, with five surgeries.... Very soon I ’ll go to my
brothers. W hat does Psalm 89 say? The days o f our years, in
th eir span they b e threescore yea rs a n d ten. A n d i f we be in
strength, m ayhap fourscore years; an d w hat is m ore than these is
toil a n d travail. For m ildness has come upon us, a n d we sh a ll be
chasten ed (10 - 11). It’s as if in a dream that I hear you speak,
my dear! The mercy o f the Most H oly Trinity brought you
here! I wanted us to see each other once more in this life!
You never know! Oh my! H ow many things God made us go

through!
Ft: Arsenie: It’s very good that each o f us prays for the
other!... Let us bring forth sacrifice so that we may be in the
Kingdom o f God! For we’ve desired this greatly in the depths
o f our hearts! But who can say he deserves it? That is why we
have to pray, Fr. Cleopa!
Ft: Cleopa: Lord! Theotokos! How did You bring him here?
I greatly desired to see him once more, poor man! For I knew
that he’s honest and possesses the fear o f G od! He helped me
when I was bitter and depressed! Poor man, he went through
a lot!
Monks, interrupting: Come back to us, Fr. Arsenie, at least
now in old age.
F r Arsenie: I desire to come more than your Reverences
desire it! I’ve felt the spirit o f God in this monastery. I was
with Fr. Cleopa in the woods, and once he said with insistence
that if he died—he thought about it honestly— I should bring
him to Sihăstria. I told him, “You should bind my legs and
throw me away!” God didn’t want us to die! It’s said that the
history o f a nation is written on walls. At Sihăstria it's written
on the trees!
Fr. Cleopa: The mercy o f God has preserved us until now.
I ’m eighty-five and he’s eighty-three.
F r Arsenie: I’ve been in Techirghiol for twenty-one years
now. Many people come and I ’m alone. Can you imagine:
the whole o f Dobrogea seeks us. I confess people continually.
It’s my most tiring obedience! But I comfort myself with the
thought that God wanted it like this, and I shouldn’t have
cause for sadness. God forbid! Don’t be sad! We must be in
a state o f continuous cheerfulness that holds us upright, and
keeps us in motion. God doesn’t have anyone else in the world
to ask for support but us!
Don’t give up! No matter how little you are, no matter
2.68
APPENDIX ONE
Elders Clcop.i and

Arsenic during their
last meeting.
how tired, vou mustn’t give up. For, I repeat, no misfortune

means anything. Nothing is lost as long as faith is established,
the soul doesn’t surrender, and you raise your head again! God
forbid that you be sad! Don’t be afraid! It’s true, one’s thought
should be in hell and in hell only.1 But hope should be with
God without ceasing, thinking that He greatly loves us. Fa
thers, God is more intimate with us than we are! When you
think about this, you fill yourself with hope. But, our deeds, no
matter how amazingly good, can’t save us. They can’t erase any
thing. And, no doubt, we’re sinners, but with hope. Hope—
this is it!
Monasticism is a great thing, Fathers. Many things have
been said about monasticism, subdc things, but no one has
exhausted it. All its beauty lies in denying one’s own will. De
nying one’s will is a continuous struggle, with G od’s help. We
must prevail, for He created us with free will. And when you
1“ Keep thy mind in hell and despair not.” — St. Silouan the Athonite.
think: what arc the efforts that we make for such a great hon
or? Eat when you’re hungry, drink when you’re thirsty, but
remain here [in the monastery]. St. Arsenius the Great said
that!
So, Fathers, let us greatly rejoice that we’re monks! Allow
me to say this— I greatly desire that at the end o f my life I ’ll be
able to say, “I die happy because I ’m a monk!” And I was very
much tempted, Fathers: prisons, wilderness, abbacy, all sorts o f
things, even now as a father confessor.
A girl about twenty-five or thirty years old— I think she
was a teacher— once asked me, when I was on the stairs of my
house in the monastery, “ Father, what’s the first requirement to
become a monk?” I quickly replied, “To be crazy!” She under
stood!
We go to the monastery out o f the necessity of our soul.
Then you start fighting with yourself, Brother. And you should
not give up by any means! You should not look for salvation
per se! You have to look for yourselves! Search for yourselves
more! As a method, always record your steps: “ What am I do
ing? Where am I going? Who am I?” Because one o f the great
est tactics o f the devil is to get you out o f the monastery. I ’m
also very convinced that when you’re going to the monastery,
he will engage the whole world in order to turn you around—
the whole earthly world!
We’re Christ’s brides! Whom should a groom love more
than his bride? Moreoever, haven’t you noticed that Christ
first called His apostles servants, and then He called them “ My
brothers!” We are where we’re supposed to be. The position o f
monks is great on this earth!
Fr. Cleopa: Let’s see each other in heaven, dear!
Fr. Arsenic: I pray that you remember and understand me.
Fathers, I close up fewer buttons so that I have less to unbut
ton. That’s how little time I have!
Fr. Cleopa: So many people turn to him!
17 0
APPENDIX ONE
Fr. Arsenic: Fathers, let’s bow down our faces to the ground
and thank the Lord that He gave us this strength to be monks.
Preserve complete unity. Respect each other from the highest
to the lowest, and from the lowest to the highest. No one is
insignificant. Each one o f us is Christ’s friend. We’re not slaves.
Besides, many times the freedom o f a slave can be greater than
that o f a king.
Please believe me when I say that there’s great need for fa
ther confessors in the monasteries. When you think that there
are many monasteries without a father confessor ...
Fr. Cleopa: He’s alone, dear him! It’s the mercy o f the Most
Holy Trinity that I see you, dear! Look how white his beard
has turned— it used to be red!
Fr. Arsenic: Fathers, 1 eat when I’m hungry, I don’t quite
sleep because I don’t have time—but I would if I did— and
I’m cheerful in my heart. These are my secrets. I love the mon
astery! I thank God with all my heart that He gave me the
thought o f going to the monasterv decades ago! No one taught
me, but nevertheless, I went.
Fr. Cleopa: A miracle from the Lord, dear!
F r Arsenic: Ibis is the greatest miracle that God does for
man: to give him the grace o f going to a monastery! It’s greater
than resurrecting the dead, than healing the sick, because it
places you on the highest level o f the Holy Scripture. “Do you
want to be perfect? Sell everything, take up your cross, and
follow M e!” (cf. Matt. 19:11). Fathers, the cross means to bear
what you don’t like! This is the cross!
Fr. Cleopa: That’s right, my dear! It’s like a dream seeing
you show up here! May the Most Holy Trinity and the Moth
er o f God grant that we meet each other in the other life, my
dear! Don’t forget me in your prayers! The Savior says in the
Gospel, “ Watch and pray, for you do not know the day or the
hour ...” (cf. Matt. 15:13). But what can you expect at this age?
Fr. Arsenic·. Well, Father ...
Fr. Cleopa: And if you hear that I’ve died, come to absolve
[my sins] at my grave!
Fr. Arsenic: I wish that God would help me to do that.
But who knows what will happen to me! And who will depart
first? We don’t know. Many times the younger ones do.
17Z
APPENDIX TW O
R E C O L L E C T IO N S OF
T W O S P IR IT U A L SO NS
Hieromonk llart on (D an), Holy Cross M onastery
to understand that there are things you can ac

I
HAVE COM E
quire only from a living person, a person who really lives
with the Good God. You can receive the word o f the Living
God only from the people who live it. You cannot take it from
a letter, from a book. O f course it would be great to be able to
do that. Obviously, text in a book is helpful, it is a foundation,
but I believe that this is what happens, at least for me. Today I
would not be where I am, if I had not met Fr. Arsenie.
Nevertheless, at the time I met him I was already close to the
Church. (Paradoxically, although I was born in Constanta, I did
not meet Fr. Arsenie until I was thirty-four years old.) God ar
ranged for a certain change at a particular point in my life, right
after the Revolution.1 I was a clerk working for the Romanian
government at the time. While working in Bucharest I lived with
my brother-in-law, who was a student at the Business Academy
and also at the Theological Faculty. Discussing the spiritual mat
ters with which I was becoming familiar, he counseled me to go
for Confession. I didn’t really know what this was. I didn’t have
the courage to go for Confession. And so I was encouraged to go
to Fr. Sofian (Boghiu) from Antim Monastery.
1 The Revolution ofDeccm ber 1989, which marked the end o f forty-two
years o f Com munist rule in Romania.— E d .
One afternoon I went to Fr. Sofian. There were a lot o f

people waiting to see him when I got there. I waited patiently
in line for a while. But after some time impatience and a mul
titude o f headaches and stomach pains engulfed me. Finally I
got to Fr. Sofian: an exceptional spiritual father o f whom I have
a very pleasant memory, who greatly benefitted my soul. When
later on I told him that I wanted to return home he said: go
to Fr. Arsenie. And behold, I went to Bucharest with one goal
and I returned with a different one. This is how God arranged
things for me. I had to get to Bucharest to learn about Fr. A r
senie. I had not heard o f him in Constanta.
And I went to Fr. Arsenie. It was during Great Lent in 1991.
And there was an endless line o f people waiting at Fathers cell,
and again I stayed there for a while. I realized I had no chance
to enter in. I left, I gave up, and I returned a few days later.
And Father received me. I have said this before: the moment I
entered his cell he adopted me; I became his spiritual son, and
I have remained one up to this moment. For this reason I feel
privileged.
But do you see the paradox? Many o f you who knew and
were close to Fr. Arsenie felt that he was yours, as I feel he
is mine. Father loved you unconditionally, as God loves, with
an absolute love for everyone who came to see him. It was an
overwhelming love ... which you carried in your soul— it pen
etrated easily and you constantly carried it there. You felt the
need to return permanently in order for this love to inundate
you, to encompass you, and for you to feel you could fly. This
is how Fr. Arsenie was.
A t some point I decided to radically change my way o f life
and to enter a monastery (my life had entered another phase).
I confessed this thought to him; he greatly rejoiced. Maybe he
was waiting for it, maybe he knew— I don’t know— and he en
couraged me, he embraced me. And he kept on waiting for me
to take the step. And I kept delaying it. Because that’s how it is
174
APPENDIX T W O
(as Fr. Arsenie would say): when you want to go to the mon
astery the enemy does everything he can to stop you, and after
you go he does everything he can to get you out. This applied
to me as well. The enemy was doing everything he could to
stop me. I was pretty determined, but not determined enough.
A year had passed: I was still trying to divest myself o f worldly
things, and I wasn’t successful. And at some point Fr. Arsenie
told me, “Br. Ionel [Fr. Ilarion’s name prior to monasticism],
there is no more time.” He was talking about the value o f time.
And this word had no answer—what could one have said? Fr.
Arsenie said: “There is no more time. There is no more time;
that means it’s over!”
“And what should I do?”
“ Well, take your bag and go!”
And this is what I did: I took my bag and left.
I went to see Fr. Arsenie one more time before leaving. I told
him I was going. He took me by the shoulders, embraced me, and
said, “Humility, Br. Ionel, humility!” This was like a testament
for my life in the monastery, for my entire life. I took this word,
and I have been trying to keep it— although I confess I don’t
always do as I desire. But it was pretty powerful. It penetrated
quite deeply into my conscience and into my heart, so that I
would never be able to forget it. Thus was Fr. Arsenie.
In our frequent discussions I would suggest to him, “Father,
maybe you should say something, be more firm, express your
self somehow!” And he would say, “ Who am I? A poor little
priest!" Thus was Fr. Arsenie: he was a giant, but he would say,
“ W ho am I? A poor little priest!” He, who followed the coun
sel o f the Savior, “Take heed, I have overcome the world” (cf.
John 16:33). And he did attain it: he overcame the world, fol
lowing the words o f the Savior. You well know what he went
through— terrible trials— and how he stood fast against every
trial and provocation. Thus was Fr. Arsenie: a humble and cou
rageous man, a true man— as I wish to be and as I desire many
175
to be, because we have a tremendous need o f such men. This

country needs such men.
I believe Fr. Arsenie is a living example, because he is alive
there, in heaven, and he is alive in our hearts. This must be
a daily encouragement for us: at every moment we should
be mindful o f his counsels. I at least realize that Fr. Arsenie’s
teaching usually influences all my thoughts, everything I pon
der on, and everything I do. It is impossible to forget any o f his
words— extraordinary and astute in their simplicity. Their pro
found simplicity was akin to Fr. Arsenie’s extraordinary ability
to get to the essence o f things. And when he gave you an an
swer, you would be left speechless. You would understand that
here was the answer: there was no reply; there was nothing else
possible. I thank the Good God for this gift.
Sorin Alpctri
M y f i r s t t h o u g h t is one o f thanksgiving and profound

gratitude to God, Who arranged for us to be among those
privileged to have met Father on the path o f life— some soon
er, others later. Nevertheless, the deciding factor was not the
amount o f time spent with Father, but the disposition o f the
heart. It seems that the true history o f each one o f us began
then, at the blessed moment in which we completely entrusted
ourselves to him.
In addition to the measure that each entrusted himself
to Fr. Arsenie, there were also the open fatherly arms of the
God-pleaser. His love, his openness towards everyone, would
draw you to him. He would make you feel special, regardless
o f your circumstances or your story—whether they were serene
or murky. He would give everyone a sense o f personal worth.
You always felt that Father appreciated you in a special way,
that all his thoughts and all his labor were enveloping you. It is
wonderful that he dedicated himself with the greatest sincerity
APPEN D IX T W O
to thousands and thousands o f people who, in turn, asked his

guidance with the same sincerity. Fathers letters abundantly
prove this.
From your first meeting, he would accurately diagnose
you. W ith honesty, you could acknowledge it. And there was
always a way out o f all difficulties, as he himself would assure
you— but only with patience, with sacrifice, and especially with
his immeasurable support, that is, his prayer, which had great
boldness in the highest.
He said nothing by chance or without a particular purpose.
Every word you received from him, which oftentimes would
seem incomprehensible to you, had an intrinsic value, a deep
meaning. You just had to preserve and analyze it thoroughly
in order to understand: “ Why did Father tell me this?” Un
derstanding its meaning was already the first step towards heal
ing. You didn’t necessarily have to be in Confession to receive
a word. Father wouldn’t miss an opportunity at any moment,
in any circumstance.
He was tireless in counselling. You would often realize you
were receiving the same advice reiterated, and this would as
tonish you, until you understood that you hadn’t put the ad
vice into practice at all, and that’s why he would give it to you
again and again, until you brought it to fruition.
He would support you in every trouble or sorrow— dis
cerning the instructive clement in every tribulation. His objec
tive was to keep you on the path, “although there are potholes
and rocks on the way,” so you could carry your cross, “small as
it is, but it’s yours.” He would reassure you that “there is no
way without it,” and since you have to carry it, at least do it
without murmuring, and it will be easier.
Every one o f his counsels was supported by his personal
example. He had already applied every piece o f his own ad
vice. H e would carry his cross without complaint. W hen suf
fering, he would say, “ If God so wills.” He would endure pains
177
without murmuring, and for his humility, God would always

aid him. There were many times when he was hospitalized in
critical condition, when he had already reached the great age o f
eighty. Nonetheless, after everything he had endured, he would
still recover more quickly than other, younger patients.
As a spiritual father, Fr. Arsenie would create suitable con
ditions for you to confess everything. He greatly appreciated
those who “confessed thoroughly.” Nothing he heard in Con
fession would scandalize him; rather he would lower himself
to your level in all things, profoundly understanding them
without minimizing them. He would assure you in all things,
promising that you would be fervently commemorated, but he
would warn you that he could not help you without your ef
fort, without your little prayer.
He would in no way impede your freedom; he would not
force anything on you. He would say, “If you want my opinion
...” If you had even the slightest opposition to his guidance, he
would immediately feel it. He would not continue his coun
sel if you didn’t accept it freely, with all your heart. He would
humble himself greatly on such occasions.
He had a deep understanding of things, situations, and
people. He would weigh everything, to the smallest detail.
“Not everything is in all the things surrounding you,” he often
said. He would try to heal us o f idealizing things that were not
as they seemed— to make us see situations realistically, under
stand our own abilities, and act accordingly.
As the Holy Apostle Paul said, F or though y e have ten thou
sa n d instructors in Christ, y e t have y e not many fa th er s (I Cor.
4:15). Arsenie, our spiritual father, was one o f these tew true
fathers who lay their lives down for their spiritual children.
Z78
IN D E X
Page numbers fo r illustrations are in boldface italics.
Agathangclos, monk o f Stănişoara. 1 11 ,1 1 9 - 3 0 ,2 3 2 - 3 3 ,1 5 0

67 entry into monasticism of, 6 2 -6 6
Aiud Prison, 4 3 - 5 7 ,13 8 - 7 1,14 0 eyes of, 10 7 -8
isolation cells at, 142 funeral of, 262-63,26 2
reeducation system at, 139 ,159 -71 generosity of, 14 0 -4 3
Zarea section of, 4 7 - 4 8 ,14 0 - 4 1 grave of, 26s
A lba Iulia, 48 guardian angel of, 79,165
Alexander the Great, 190 health problems of, 116 -17 , 2.36,
almsgiving, 14 ,17 9 , 2oon, 14 0 - 4 1 1 4 5 - 4 6 ,2 4 9 , 252,254-57. 16 0 -
Alpetri, Sorin, 17 6 -7 8 61,278
A nthony the Great, St., 121 imprisonment at Aiud of, 43-57,
A ntim Monastery, 123,173 138-71
Antoncscu, Ion, 33-36, 44 Confession o f prisoners during,
apophatic theology, 114 147
Apuseni Mountains, 176 Divine Liturgy served during,
Arscnie (Boca), Fr., 21311 14 6 - 47.157
Arsenic (Papacioc), Archimandrite in isolation cell during, 148-49,
animals loved by, 7 5 -7 6 ,14 9 -5 0 163-68
appearance o f Christ to, 166-67 release from, 17 0 -7 4
arrests of, 31-33, 4 2 ,12 5 -3 4 interrogation and torture of, 12 7 -
artistic talent of, 18, 4 /, 55-57, 36* 3 4 ,13 8 - 4 4 . 154-55
10 7 as a Legionnaire, 1 4 -3 7
asceticism of, 209, 245, 249 as mayor, 3 5 - 37.37
athletic ability of, 1 1 - 1 5 ,1 9 1 . 2 .1 1 — in old age, 136 -6 5
11 life in Antim Monastery of, 89-93
beard of, 187-89, 207,267 as spiritual father and pastor, 115 -
cell of, 2 0 6 ,2 3 1,2 3 9 11, 14 8 -4 9 , 158-59, 176 -8 1,
childhood of, 1 3 - 1 1 1 0 2 - 4 , 209. 211, 2 13-15 , 1 1 4 ,
discernment of, 53-54, 10 1, 104, 2 29 -34 , 2 3 7 - 3 8 ,15 0 ,17 4 -7 8
279
IND EX
Arsenie (Papacioc), Archimandrite ence, 64, 83, 9 7 ,118 - 19 ,15 1—52.,

(continued) 1 1 8 ,1 4 4 ,1 4 8
life in Căldăruşani Monastery of, on the Church, 1 13 - 1 4 ,1 4 3
19 1-9 4 on Confession, 8 1-8 3, 2.13, 1 1 4 ,
life in Cheia Monastery of, 18 1-9 1 138
life in Comanca of, 74 -78 on the Cross, 68, 131, 164, 198—
life in Cozia Monastery of, 64-77, 9 9 ,1 1 0 ,1 10 ,13 7 , 2 4 4 -4 5 . 277
on death, 1 10 ,17 9 ,1 5 7 ,1 6 0 - 6 1
life in Dintr-un Lemn Monastery on ecclesiastical arts, 14 7
of, 19 4 -10 0 on G od s love, 10 8 ,16 6 ,117
life in Filea of, 174-8 1 on G od s Providence, 156, 194,
life in Neamţ Monastic Seminary 255
of, 8 6-8 7,9 3-9 6 on grace, 10 1,10 8 ,1 4 5
life in Sihăstria Monastery of, S i - on hell, 130, 148, 113, 1 1 4 , 1 1 6 -
89 17 ,14 8 ,16 9
life in Slatina Monastery of, 1 1 1 - 1 6 on humility, 50 -51, 66, 68-69,
life in Techirghiol Monastery of, 9 9 ,1 0 0 ,1 0 1 ,1 0 7 - 8 ,1 1 0 - 1 1 ,1 1 7
10 5 -6 1 on imprisonment as a spiritual
life in the wilderness of, 83-84, academy, 4 6 -4 7 ,13 8 ,15 1
97-10 9 on love for enemies, 1 1 - 1 1 , 17,
love for people by, 14 9 -5 0 ,18 8 ,115 , 4 6 ,15 5 -5 6 ,18 9 ,14 8
130,137.2.53-54 on monasticism, 6 6 -7 0 , 1 4 4 ,
love o f nature by, 139 16 9 - 7 1, 275
military service of, 18 -3 0 , 29, 38- on obedience, 1 0 8 - 9 ,1 1 9 - 3 0
39 on persecution ot the Church,
miracles in the life of, 79, 95, 103, no, 14 5 -4 6
10 8 ,111,15 1,16 5 - 6 7 ,17 0 on prayer, 118 -19 , n o - 1 1 , 1 1 1
photographs of, a, 6, /2, ///, 126, on repentencc, 119 ,18 4
17S, 18 6 ,2 0 8 ,2 jo , 2 19 , 228, 233, on resisting the devil, 1 0 0 - 1 0 1
2 4 2 ,2 / /, 263,269 on revenge, 1 6 ,1 6 - 1 7
prayer of, 46, 4 9 -5 0 ,5 2 .-5 3 ,10 0 on sacrifice, 47, 60, 75, 108, 131,
preaching of, 1 0 - 1 1 , 86-88, 179, 1 1 1 - 1 3 , 237-38, 14 4 - 4 5 . 263,
189,2.47,153.2.54 16 8 -6 9
repose of, 1 6 1 - 6 1 on salvation, 1 1 4 - 1 7
surveillance of, 15 3 -5 4 .18 5 -8 7 ,19 1, on self-denial, 71
195-99 on spiritual progress, 6 9 -7 1,
teachings o f 1 0 6 - 7 ,1 4 7
on almsgiving, 1 4 0 - 4 1 on suffering, 47, 13 1-3 3 , 152-53,
on asceticism, 10 6 - 8 ,119 ,13 5 168, 198-99, 110 , 14 9 , 156,
on the awareness o f G o d s pres 277-78
280
IN D E X
on temptations, 99-100,194 , 1 1 0 trial o f members of, 134-35

on the H oly Gifts, 94-95
on the Jesus Prayer, 91-91, 111, Câldâru$ani Monastery, 191-94, ip j
113 Calinic, Sr„ 101
on the M other o f G od, 66 - 68, Carol II, King o f Rom ania, 19, 31,
194,111,158-59 33 n, 3 4 . 13°. i >5
on theoretical knowledge, 91-91, cataphatie theology, 114
1 44 ,14 8,1 54 Cernica Monastery, 174,199-104
on the priesthood, 50,111-13 Cheia Monastery, 181-91, ig j, iSS
on the Proskomedia, 130, 184, children, 161,107,153
116-17 Christian education, 16
on travelling, 173 Cleopa (Ilie), Archimandrite, 81-83,
on visions, 168 S2, 85-86, 88, 97-98, 106-9,
on watchfulness, 98, 104, 106-7, 110-15, 173, 117, 22S, 167-71,
118-19,157,114,134 269
on women, 181,119 Cluj, 174
tonsure of, 89-91 Codreanu, Corneliu Zelea, 14-16
Arsenius the Great, St., 90 Cojocaru, Nae, i6r
atheists, atheism, 139,145,190,195 Comanca, 74-78
Augustine o f Hippo, Blessed, 66 Communion, Holy, 14, 47n, 94-95,
147-48,157,180,114
Baptism, 13, 99,10311 Confession, Holy Mystery of, 176-
Bartolomeu (Anania), Metropolitan, 79, 181-84, 194. 103-4. m .
113 113-14, 111, 114, 117, 130-31,
Basil the Great, St., 81, 97 138, 145. 1 4 9 - 5 0 . 151. i 55- 5<>·
beauty, 151,130,153-54 161,173-74.177-78
Benedict (Ghiuş), Hieromonk, 61, conscience, 16,50,58,170,113,175
63, Sp, 13$, 173,100,104 Constantine, Holy Emperor, 169
Bistriţa Monastery, 154-55 Cozia Monastery, 64-77, i f . 73
Braşov, 36-39 Crâciun, Colonel Gheorghe, 139,
Brotherhood o f St. Theodore the 141, 153- 5 4 . 159 . 161-63. 165—
Studite, 113 66,170
Bucharest, 18, 11-13, 15· 5°· 5®· 4 °· Cross o f Christ, 9 -1 0 ,4 8 ,5 4,6 8,1 46 ,
4 4 , 48,57, 61,81, 89,91,95, no. 157,164,199,103,110
113, 113, 119, 139, 141, 155—56. Elevation of, 110
167, 171-74, 191, 101-3, i° 6 . Procession of, 170-71
i n , 146,153,155-56,161,173-
74 Dabija, Gheorge, 135
Burning Bush movement, 6in, 9m , Daniil (Tudor) Hieroschemamonk,
113,131,133.190-91 9 1 . '3 4
18 1
IN D E X
death, 19, 47, 68, 115, 121, 119, I j 1 j Ghyka, Prince Alexandru, 1 6 0 - 6 1
14 0 ,14 3 ,14 9 ,16 5 ,16 9 ,113 , i 57 grace, 31,51, 66, 6 9 -7 0 , 9 9 -10 0 ,10 2 ,
remembrance of, 1 10 ,19 9 ,14 7 - 4 8 108, 151, 157, 167, 170, 189, 198,
Demetrios (Basarabov), St., 6 i 1 1 0 , 1 1 1 , 1 1 8 , 1 2 0 , 2 14 , 217, 238,
demons, 5 5 ,7 0 ,10 9 ,15 8 ,15 4 2-45. 154 . 2 6 3.16 7 .2 7 1
despair, 1 0 1 , 1 1 3 , 1 1 6 Gregory o f Decapolis, St., 254-5S
Dintr-un Lemn Monastery, 194-99,
19 6 heaven, 27, 108-9 , “ 3. ‘ 52. 164. <74 .
Dubncac, Felix, 135 190,198, 2 1 1 , 1 1 4 , 245, 2 6 1-6 3,
17 0 ,17 6
Eliade, Mircca, 3 1 , 31η hell, 1 3 0 ,1 4 2 ,1 4 8 - 4 9 , 1 0 2 , 1 1 3 , 1 2 4 ,
Emilian (Olaru), Fr., 113 1 16 - 1 7 ,2 4 8 ,1 6 9
Holy Land, the, 218
Făgăraş Mountains, 40 humility, 6 6 ,6 8 ,9 9 - 10 2 ,10 7 - 8 ,112 -
faith, 4 6 ,9 5 ,113,119 ,14 1,15 6 ,15 9 ,17 0 , 13, 119 η , 167-68 , 179, n o - 1 1 ,
1 13 ,1 18 ,1 1 7 ,1 5 7 ,1 6 9 227, 219, 259. 275. 278
fear, 19 ,5 1,5 4 -5 5 ,6 8 ,7 8 ,9 7 .113 ,15 3 -
5 4 ,16 0 ,18 4 ,19 9 ,118 Iachint (Unciulcac), Archimandrite,
o f God, 1 4 ,1 3 1 ,1 4 1,18 5 ,1 13 ,1 6 8 87
Filea, 174-8 1 lanolidc, loan, 58
church o f Filea de Jos, 17 8 laşi, 172-73
Firmilian, Metropolitan o f Craiova, Ilarion (Dan), Hicromonk, 273-76
80 llie (Cioruţă), Hieromonk, 1 0 0 ,2 0 1
forgiveness, 10 7 ,115 ,111,18 9 ,13 8 illness (sickness), 143, 155, 203, 109,
Frăsinei Monastery, 64 24 5-4 6
Ioanichie (Bălan), Archimandrite,
Gafencu, Valeriu, 43,4 4 2 1 7 - 1 8 ,1 3 5
Galaţi, 136 Iustinian (Stoica), Hicrodcacon,
Gavriil (Stoica), Archimandrite, 183— 116 -18 ,1 1 8
84, 200, 257, ay i, 15 9 -6 0
Ghenoiu, Ghenadie, 173 Jacob, Patriarch, 69
Gheorghe, Văsâi, 135 Jalea, Ion, 57
Gherasim (llie), M onk, 10 6 -7 Jesus Christ, Lord, God, and Savior,
Gherasim (Iscu), A bbot o f Tismana 51, 58-59, 67, 7 1, 74η, 86-87,
Monastery, 7 6 ,7 8 91, 9 9 -10 0 , 102, io8, 145, 153,
Ghermano, A bbot o f Cozia Monas 160, 164, 179, 181, 185, 194-9S.
tery, 7 2 -8 0 198, 113, 2 10 , 228, 24 3-4 5, 263,
Gherontie (Bălan), Fr., 8 1,113 2 7 0 -7 1
Ghervasie, Fr„ o f C ozia Monastery, appearance to Fr. Arsenie of, 167
65-66 crucifixion of, 6 8 ,116 ,16 3
IN D E X
Cross of, see Cross o f Christ 169, 227

faith in, 170, see also faith Mark o f Athens, St., 260
icon of, 206 marriage, 181
knowledge of, 9 Maxim, Virgil, 4 3 - 4 4 , 4 9 - 5 4 ,/ 0
prayer to, 46, 259, see also prayer Miercurea C iuc, 3 1- 3 4 , 58
sacrifice for, 9, 68, i29n Mihăilcscu, Emanoil, 136
Second Com ing of, 244 Mina, monk o f Sihăstria, 8 4-8 5
as the Truth, 254 Mircea the Elder, K ing, 64n
union with, i64n Mironescu, Alexandru, 12 3 ,1 2 4 ,13 5
Jesus Prayer, 91-92., 221, 223, 223m Misleanu, 13, 20,22,58 , 61
225 Moldavia, 17 2-7 3
Jilava Prison, 134 ,136 monasticism, 20, 58, 66, 81, 86-87,
John Chrysostom, St., 82-83, 173, 94,108,113,132, 206, 269
224 Morse code, 131,144,147,163
John the Evangelist, St., 90-9 1 Mother o f God, Most Holy, 23, 67,
Joja, Constantin, 123 107,189,194,198, in , 219, 258-
judging, 150 59, 268,271
Justinian, Patriarch o f Romania, 97, Mount Athos, 218-20,219
n o, 174,19 9, 215 Muslims, 246-47
Kant, Immanuel, 24 4 -4 5 Naidim, Marin, 4 3 ,16 4 ,16 6

Neamţ Monastic Seminary, 86-87,
Legion o f the Archangel Michael 93-96
(the Legionnaires), 24 -28, 45 Neamţ Mountains, 97
life in Cernica Monastery, 19 9 -204
love, 58, 68, 83-84, 86, 9 8 ,112 -13 ,115 . obedience, 28, 70,108, 220,228
118, 120, 14 9 -50, 162, 176, 181, Orthodox Bible and Missionary In
189, 191, 193, 198, 201, 211, 215, stitute, the, 89
225-27, 229-30, 237-38, 244,
250, 263, 2 7 0 -7 1, 274, 276 Paisius (Olaru), Elder, 81-8 4 ,
for Christ, 59, 67,108 Papacioc, Ion (brother o f Fr. Arse-
for enemies, 16, 21, 27,155,190 nie), 58, 6 1-6 2 ,6 1
for God, 129,132 Papacioc, Mircea (grandfather), 14
o f country, 34, 43, 243 Papacioc, Radu (brother), 30-32,55,
o f neighbors, 24, 67, 132, 179, 188, 106
221, 248-49 Papacioc, Stanca (mother), 13-15, /5,
48
Macarius the Great, St., 130 Papacioc, Vasile (father), 13-14 ,7 5 ,16
Marcu (Dumitrcscu), Monk o f Si- Paraskcva, St., 120,122
hastria, 4 4 , 116, 127-31, 12 8 , Pasărea Monastery, n o - 11
283
IN D E X
passions, 6 8 ,9 1,15 1 174, 17 7 -7 9 . 181. 185-87, 1 9 1 -

Patericon, 154 1 0 0 ,1 0 6 - 7 , i n . 118
Paul, Holy Apostle, 4 1 ,17 3 files on Fr. Arsenic of, 118
penance, 8 1,8 6 , 2.01, 1 0 5 ,1 1 4 self-will, 138
Petrişor, Marcel, 14 9 ,7 5 0 ,16 0 -6 1 Serghic, Fr. Vasilc, 43, 4 9 -5 1
Petroniu (Tănase), Archimandrite, Sihăstria Monastery, 81-89, S4, 117 ,
89-90, 90, 9 1, 94m 113, i t 6, 167
10 0 silence, 4 9 ,9 1 ,1 0 5 ,1 1 8 ,1 1 3 ,1 1 0 ,1 5 3
Piatra Craiului Mountain, 3 9 -4 0 ,131 Silouan the Athonite, St., 10 1, i i 4 n ,
Pistol, Dan, 136 i 69n
Piteşti prison, 159 Simeon, Abbot o f Frăsinei, 64
prayer, 2 .8 ,31-31,4 6 ,4 9 ,5 1-5 3,5 5 ,6 7 , sin, 43, 4 6 ,5 4 , 6 1, 84, 1 0 1 , 1 1 1 , 148,
79 -8 0 , 85, 91, 95, 98, 106, 109, 184, 194, 1 0 1 - 3 , n o , 1 1 1 - 1 3 ,
116 -19 , 148, 157-58. 167, 179, 119 , 1 1 4 , 138, 14 3 . 14 8 , 15 1,
1 8 1 - 8 1,18 9 ,1 9 3 ,10 0 - 1 0 1,10 4 , 1 6 0 ,1 7 1
108, 1 1 0 ,1 1 6 , 1 1 1 - 1 4 , 2 19 -30 , Slatina Monastery, p i, 1 0 9 ,1 1 1 - 1 4
13 1,13 5 ,14 1,14 4 ,15 7 ,16 1- 6 1, brothers of, h i
1 7 1,17 7 , see also Jesus Prayer Sofian (Boghiu), Archimandrite, 89,
o f the heart, 9 1 ,1 1 1 - 1 3 9 i , p j , i 35. i 73-74
pride, 6 9 ,10 1 icon by, 94n, I05n, 10 6
priesthood, 50-51, 6 8 ,9 0 -9 1, 9 5,113, Stâniloac, Fr. Dumitru, 135,13 5
1 7 8 ,18 4 ,1 1 1- 1 3 Stănişoara Monastery, 67
Prodromou Skete, 89n, 1 1 0 State, Aurel, 16 0 -6 1
purity, 135 ,15 3 Stephen the Great, Holy Great
Prince, 184
Rădulescu, Nicolac, 135 Suceava, 117
repentance, 46, 55, 81, 86, 107, 119, Suceava Monastery, 17 1
1 4 9 ,1 8 4 ,11 4 ,1 3 8 suffering, 18, 31, 40, 45-49, 54, 60,
Roman (Braga), Archimandrite, 135 68, 75, 100, 106, 110 , 1 18 - 3 1 ,
Romanian Revolution, 1 17 - 18 141, 143, 154-56, 163-69 , 19 8 -
99, 10 3, i l l , 1 19 - 3 0 , 137, 145,
salvation, 7 ,5 1,6 8 ,8 1-8 3 ,8 8 ,10 6 ,113 , 1 4 9 , 159. 1 6 1 , 177-78
115, 148, 155, 157, 168, 176, 181,
185, 191, 10 0 , 111, 1 14 , 1 1 4 - 1 7 , Techirghiol Monastery, 10 5 -6 3 ,16 8
1 3 5 ,1 4 4 - 4 5 ,1 4 7 - 4 8 ,1 5 6 ,1 6 0 , Church o f Sts. Peter and Paul at,
16 3 ,17 0 2 14 , 1 1 5 - 1 6 ,2 33
Sbom ik (Abbot Chariton o f Valaam nuns of, i n , 1 17 ,1 5 1 ,1 5 6 - 5 7 ,1 6 1
Monastery), 9 1 - 9 1 love for Fr. Arsenie of, 14 0
Securitate, 7 1, 7 9 -8 0 , 95, 9 7 ,113 - 15 , temptations, 9, 64, 84n, 97, 9 9 -10 1,
138, 145, 15 1- 5 4 . 156-57. 159. 1 0 6 ,14 3 ,15 9 ,16 6 ,18 9 ,19 4 ,110
184
IN D E X
Teofil, Metropolitan o f Transylvania, tollhouses, 158, i58n, 157· 1(>o

>74 Trifan, Traian, 4s, 55
Teofil (Părăian), Archimandrite, Turcea, Daniel, 1 0 1 - 4
2 2 3 -17 ,2 2 6 Turnu Monastery, 7 1 - 7 3
Theodora, Blessed, 158
Theodora o f Sihla, St., 104 Uncreated Light, 6in , i04 n
cave of, 10 $ Urzică, Mihai, 172
Theodore the Studitc, St., 133
rule of, 113 Vasile (Ilie), Riassaphore-monk,
Thomas, Holy Apostle, 173 10 6 -7
thoughts, 10 1,113 ,13 9 ,16 1,16 9 ,17 6 Voiculescu, Vasile, 135
Ţigăneşti Monastery, i n —12
Tismana Monastery, 77 ,7 8 Zărneşti, 34-36
185
No matter bow little you
are, no matter boiu tired, yon
mustn’t give up. For, I repeat,
no misfortune means any
thing. Nothing is lost as long
as faith is established, the p/
soul doesn’t surrender, and
you raise your head again!”
—Elder Arsenic
1l d e r A r s e n ie o f R o m a n ia
/ (19 14 -z o n ) was a witness o f
the eternal truth of Christ, given by God to contemporary man. A man
of deep prayer, he also possessed experiential knowledge of the ways of
the world. Before going to the monastery, he had been a gifted athlete,
a talented sculptor, a soldier, a mayor, and a prisoner of the Romanian
Communist regime. Prison became a spiritual academy for him, and
after his release he dedicated his life to God as a monastic. For the next
six decades he would labor as a monk—in prison and out of prison. He
became abeloved spiritual father, counselingthe nuns ofthe Techirghiol
Monastery and the multitude of faithful who flocked to his monastic
cell. Drawing on his knowledge of the spiritual life and the workings
of the world, he was able to guide people to a life in Christ, marked by
activity, not philosophizing and speculation.
Every endeavor of his life was characterized by an intensity of pur
pose and an uncompromising confession of the truth: a knowledge that
within each moment we make our choice for eternity. During his long
years in prison, he had profound experiences of grace, which helped
himrealize the power of sufferingand sacrifice for Christ. As he himself
said, “We must sacrifice not what we have, but what we are.”
This comprehensive biography, compiled from the elders own
words, the recollections o f his spiritual children, and the 3,500 pages o f
files kept by the Romanian secret police, includes many o f Fr. Arsenie’s
counsels and spiritual maxims.
ST . H E R M A N O F A L A S K A B R O T H E R H O O D
$ 17 U .S . IS B N 978-1-887904-60-5

Eternity in The Moment. The Life and Wisdom of Elder Arsenie Papacioc

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ETERNITY

Translated from the Romanian by

Edited by the St. Herman o f Alaska Brotherhood

First edition. Printed in the United States of America

Originally published as Sorin Alpetri, Intre timp şi veşnicie: Viaţa

Front cover: Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc at Techirghiol Monas­

Back cover: Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc at Techirghiol Monas­

Names: Alpetri, Sorin, author. | Ieremia (Hieromonk), translator. | Irinie, Si­

I. From Mayor to Prisoner 31

Appendix 1: A Final Visit with Elder Cleopa 267

Be constantly vigilant, at every moment'. You can lose

J three trucks pulled into a remote monastery in the Roma­

world, throughout the twentieth century, and even up until

1 A il dates in this book are according to the Gregorian, or New, Calen­

Some readers may wonder why the elder would recount

Map o f Romania, showing locations central to Ft. Arsenie’s life.

â and î Like the “i” in “sill.”

A r c h i m a n d r i t e A r s e n i e P a p a c i o c was born on the

grandfather, a shepherd, emigrated to Romania, bringing with

Vasile and Stanca Papacioc.

Anghcl’s mother, Stanca, was from the village o f Dragu$ in

understood and respected by his friends. When they would

Another time some horses almost trampled him. “From

Beautiful little flower, who has given you life and

In the fourth grade his class, together with their teacher,

studying. “ We, the young people, were curious. And he called

3 N e vorbeşte Părintele A rsénié [Father Arsénié talks to us], vol. 3

His gift for writing enabled him to win a poetry contest

co one house, the next, to another. I had a schedule arranged a

me to Sweden.” He was a substitute for the Romanian rugby

the field. The game began. “I don’t know how I managed to

6 M onk Filoteu Bălan, M ărturia unui cre/tin. Părintele M arcu de la

for Whose defense we would enter into a life-and-death battle

Arhiva Consiliului Naţional Pentru Studierea Arhivelor Securităţii

First you do your military service, following its rules. Upon

Nevertheless, he continued to live according to the Lord’s

lined up in front o f the Legionnaires, trying to stop them from

16 Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc, interview with Asociaţia Studenţilor

Anghel Papacioc while

“ I would teach them to die,” Anghel replied. “ If soldiers

two years at the Faculty o f Chemistry in Bucharest, at the

1938 the authorities brought fabricated charges

1 a c n s a s , Penal file 0 0 0 10 1, vol. 6, pp. 4s, 50,5 1,5 7 .

fought for hours,” he told one o f his fellow prisoners.2 He was

2 a c n sa s , Informant file 18500;, v o l . p . 158.

5 ACNSAS, Penal file 400660, pp. 1 - 1 .

gionnaires and bury them in a Christian manner— including

incorporated the villages o f Tohanu Vechi, Tohanu Nou, Bran,

helping him. The man answered, “One leu.” Mayor Papacioc

allowing him time to go to General Dragalina (the nephew

“According to the archival documents, there were no gunshots,

7 Adrian Nicolae Petcu, Părintele Arsenic Papacioc in docum entele

Years later Fr. Arsenie would say, “I wanted to go to the mon­

One day he encountered a hermit on the mountain. “ That

12 Andrei Tudor, Mariana and Iuliana Conovici, Am înţeles rostul m eu ...

with Yugoslavia. Here he lived at the home of a former Legion­

my turn the lieutenant with whom I had made arrangements

among the people and accused o f attempting to escape. The

14 Valeriu Gafencu ( 19 11- 19 5 1) was arrested in 1941. During his incar­

(the future Fr. Marcu o f Sihăstria),17 and others were part of

activity. Together with Traian Trifan and Marian Traian, he in­

20 a c n s a s , Informant file 185003, vol. 3, p. 174.

“ The image I have o f my imprisonment is very much

Front cover: Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc at Techirghiol Monas

Back cover: Archimandrite Arsenie Papacioc at Techirghiol Monas

Names: Alpetri, Sorin, author. | Ieremia (Hieromonk), translator. | Irinie, Si

J three trucks pulled into a remote monastery in the Roma

1 A il dates in this book are according to the Gregorian, or New, Calen

Years later Fr. Arsenie would say, “I wanted to go to the mon

with Yugoslavia. Here he lived at the home of a former Legion

14 Valeriu Gafencu ( 19 11- 19 5 1) was arrested in 1941. During his incar

activity. Together with Traian Trifan and Marian Traian, he in

and respecting Anghel Papacioc, he knelt next to me, pro

n S e p t e m b e r 8, 1946, upon the completion o f his sen

1 Securitate: the Romanian internal secret service under the Com m u

man, for he was my abbot. But I was faithful regarding my pur

1 T h a t is, h e e n te re d th e m o n a ste ry d e te rm in e d to liv e a life fu lly d e d i

I assigned to help at the Bible Institute,1 working as a sculp

expectations from you, that you already had a great responsi

Seminary." In relating his encounter with the future Archiman