HOW SELF-CONTROL TRY YOUR HAND AT SNACK SMARTER REJUVENATE AT A

BUILDS RESILIENCE WATERCOLOURS AND FEEL BETTER! MOUNTAIN RETREAT

ISSUE #16 SEPTEMBER 2018



on how
to ease
anxiety
Working too hard and trying
to please everyone? Why
it’s ok to focus on you.

Heal spots, blemishes EXTRA

and skin conditions MINI MAG
from the inside INSIDE!
WITH A SHORT
STORY & RECIPE

WAYS TO
GROW YOUR
CONFIDENCE
 Photography Nikola Jovanovic

Growth begins
with the decision
to give it a go
WHEN WE TACKLE A CHALLENGE
– HOWEVER BIG OR SMALL – WE DISCOVER
STRENGTH, RESILIENCE AND SKILLS
WE DIDN'T KNOW WE POSSESSED.

welcome
hether you love it or leave
it, what with the World
Cup, Wimbledon and
my current sporting crush – the
Women’s Hockey World Cup, being hosted in
London as I write, this has been a long, hot summer
of sport. As a result, I’m feeling inspired to step up
my itness. I’m not talking Serena level here. For
me, this has meant committing to an extra Pilates
class a week and challenging myself to walk up the
oice stairs (we’re on the 9th loor). My measure of
success? When I can ascend said stairs and arrive at
the top still breathing (fairly) normally. Let’s just say
I’m not quite there yet, but I know that my body will
thank me for it in the long run (pun intended).
The Great Stair Challenge, as I’d like it to be known,
PS: You’ll find Take A Moment,
our extra treat for you, inside
MAGAZINE
Download
bonus papers
has also sparked conversations here in the oice
about why it is we feel the need to challenge
ourselves, and whether it’s actually good for us –
a question we explore in our feature on page 20.
“A challenge puts us in contact with parts of
ourselves that we wouldn’t otherwise see,”
explains Kimberley Wilson, Bake Of inalist,
psychologist and self-confessed challenge addict.
“A manageable amount of stress or pressure can
make you psychologically stronger and more able
to deal with diicult circumstances in the future.”
With this is mind, then, I’d like to invite you to
join me – whether your oice stairs are calling you,
or your personal challenge is of an entirely diferent
nature, I’d love to hear what inspires you. I hope we
make it to the top, but as long as we celebrate the
journey on the way, that’s good enough for me.
KIRSTIE DUHIG Editor
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 3
contents

50 HEAD TO A LITERARY
FESTIVAL TO FIND
AND FUEL YOUR
CREATIVE SIDE

108
10

30

WELLBEING 19 54 LISTICLE Follow these inspiring yogis.

20 CHALLENGE ACCEPTED Why an 56 RELATIONSHIPS Listen to your gut.

achievable goal is good for the soul.
59 CHECKING IN Does your relationship
28 WELLBEING COLUMN Overwhelmed? give you everything you need?
We'll soon have you back on track.
65 AUNT JOSEPHINE Friendship concerns.
30 SKINCARE FROM WITHIN
Natural ways to encourage and maintain
LIVING 67
2 TREATS
FOR YOU!
healthy, glowing skin.

36 SHOPPING: SUPERFOOD SKINCARE 68 SNACK SMARTER Simple snack swaps

to boost your mood and your creativity.
38 TAKE OUR QUIZ Learn how stoicism
can build resilience. 74 LIVING COLUMN Tune into the
changing of the seasons.
42 MATT HAIG ON ANXIETY
ls modern life to blame? 76 SHOPPING: UPCYCLED BAGS

50 AERIAL YOGA Take your practice skyward. 78 MY EXPERIENCE I was burnt out at 25.

4 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 MAGAZINE

88

20
68
78 76

82 BOOK CLUB Yrsa Daley-Ward talks to ESCAPING 95

us about her captivating memoir.
CREATING 85
86 CREATING COLUMN Why moments of
silence are a way to let our imagination in.
88 RELAX WITH WATERCOLOURS Emma
Block's simple potted plant tutorial.
96 A LITERARY JOURNEY
Find inspiration at a literary festival.
104 ESCAPING COLUMN Head off
on a road trip adventure.
106 SHOPPING: ROAD TRIP KIT
108 TO THE HILLS Discover rest and

90
rejuvenation on a mountain retreat.

114 LIFE LESSONS There are no limits

to what the mind can achieve.
Learn to
watercolour
26
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TODAY!
Find our great offers
for a limited time only.

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 letters

WRITE TO US

Your thoughts
WHETHER YOU’D LIKE TO TELL US WHAT’S RESONATED
WITH YOU AND INSPIRED YOU THIS ISSUE OR SIMPLY SEND
US YOUR MUSINGS, WE’D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU Illustration Esther Curtis

for sharing the details you noticed
on your adventures with us. Our
winner is Emily (@mild_madcaps),
who shared a photo of a beautiful
weed she noticed
on her way to
the station. “It
Photography @mild_madcaps
she has been on. I now feel that it’s
okay to look for a solution outside of
mainstream medicine. I can’t aford to
travel the world looking for a cure but
I can certainly look for help closer to
home. I feel now that I have made the
right decision to ind an alternative

would have been therapy (or two) that might work

Photo comp winner!
Last month, the theme of our
Instagram photo competition was
‘small things’, inspired by Karen
Flannigan’s mindful photography
feature in issue 14 where she shared
her #noticethelittlethings hashtag.
She joined us as a guest judge and we
loved all of your entries – thank you
Get in touch
www.facebook.com/
InTheMomentMag
www.instagram.com/
inthemomentmag
www.uk.pinterest.com/
inthemomentmag
www.twitter.com/
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inthemoment
@immediate.co.uk
www.calmmoment.com
so easy to walk better for me.
past,” she writes Rosie, via Facebook
in her caption.
“It was growing
from an unremarkable crack
in an unremarkable wall on an
unremarkable road. But the lower
was, on closer inspection, absolutely
stunning; a subtle shade of blue with
perfectly pointed petals.”
Emily wins a sterling silver necklace
from Mantra Jewellery, reminding
her to be ‘still, present and mindful’
every day (mantrajewellery.co.uk). Perfect timing
See our shortlist of last month’s entries I just wanted to let you know that
and ind our latest photo competition your mag is my favourite read! Every
on our Insta (@inthemomentmag). month you seem to read my mind and
there is always an article in there that
Finding relief speaks to me. This month I turn 40,
I have just read Julia Buckley’s so the milestone feature in the last
article on chronic pain in your July issue was perfectly apt and came at
issue. What a moving piece! I was just the right time.
diagnosed with MS in 2011 and sufer Kelly, via Instagram
from chronic pain. A concoction of
prescription drugs hasn’t ofered
any relief and I have recently begun
a journey towards using alternative
therapy. Like Julia, I have felt like
I should be listening to the ‘middle
aged men’ telling me what would work
for my body, instead of listening to
my own mind. I have been so inspired
by her recollection of the journey

6 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 MAGAZINE

Meet our talented The team

Editorial

contributors Editor-in-chief Jules Taylor

Editor Kirstie Duhig
Art Editor Becki Clark
Art Assistant Olivia Watkins
It takes a lot to make your monthly guide to a Production Editor Katharine Bennett
mindful life, and it’s all thanks to our talented writers Digital Editor Sarah Orme

and contributors (as well as everyone else working behind Contributors

the scenes). Say hello to four of this issue’s contributors… Illustration Esther Curtis, Becki Clark, Amelia
Flower Olivia Watkins, Geraldine Sy
Photography Phil Sowels
Additional design Julian Dace, Nicky Gotobed
Additional production Jo Carnegie, Carys Evans,
Bethan Rose Jenkins, Claire Vaughan
REBECCA HANMER
Rebecca is a full-time television producer, Advertising
Call: 0117 300 8206
occasional writer, intermittent abstract Group Advertising Manager Penny Stokes
painter and mum-of-two who likes to take on Account Manager Emelie Arnold
Senior Brand Executive Ruth Cole
a challenge when she has some spare time.
Find her on Twitter (@RHanmer) Marketing and Circulation
Direct Marketing Manager Penny Clapp
Turn to page 20 to read how Rebecca Direct Marketing Executive Joe Jones
got on with her latest challenge Newstrade Marketing Manager Helen Seymour
International Account Manager Juliette Winyard

Production
SARAH TASKER Production Director Sarah Powell
Production Coordinator Sarah Greenhalgh
You probably already know Sarah via her
social media name, Me & Orla. She shares Licensing
Licensing and Syndication Tim Hudson
her beautiful photography on her Instagram
Photography James Melia

tim.hudson@immediate.co.uk
account (@me_and_orla), which is bursting International Partners Manager Anna Brown
with creativity and fresh perspective. Publishing
Sarah talks training our imaginations Publishing Director Catherine Potter
in her new column on page 86 Publisher (Digital) Charlotte Morgan

Subscriptions
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call 03330 162153
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Suzy knows a thing or two about what we Immediate Media Company
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shares her knowledge online as Peppermint Managing Director, Bristol Andy Marshall

Wellness (www.peppermintwellness.co.uk) Immediate Media Company Bristol Limited (company number 05715415) is registered in
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EMMA BLOCK subcontractors shall be liable for loss or damage.

Emma is an illustrator who creates gorgeous

hand-painted pictures for everything from
calendars to stories. Her irst book, The Joy Need support?
of Watercolor, has just been published. Read If you’re feeling low and need to
talk to someone, contact:
more from Emma at www.emmablock.co.uk Mind at www.mind.org.uk
Find Emma’s watercolour tutorial on page NHS Direct on 111
Samaritans on 116 123
88 and create a potted plants scene Befrienders Worldwide at www.befrienders.org

7
 MAGAZINE
Uplifting ideas, stories and inspiration
from around the world
Women of invention
Machines, medicines, ice cream... women
have invented things in a staggering variety
of ields, often working in obscurity. In our
mini series, we’re sharing a female inventor
who changed the world. This month – the
woman who wrote the irst novel.
Murasaki Shikibu was born in Kyoto,
Japan in 978. It is said that she was a
lady-in-waiting to the Emperor’s daughter
at Japanese court. The story goes that
said daughter tired of the books she had
to read, and so gave Murasaki a royal order
to write something more compelling.
Write it she did, penning a hefty manuscript
telling the tale of lusty courtier, Genji, and his
romantic escapades. The Tale of Genji was
published at the start of the 11th century
and is widely thought to be the world’s irst
full-length novel – and, by the sounds of it,
the irst chick lit book too. Though, with the
English translation running over 1,000 pages
long, this might not be one we can pop in
our bag for our commute!
8 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
Photography Thinx
Free your low
No matter how organised our menstruation
admin is (correct-absorbency tampons,
spare moon cups, pads in bag pockets),
it’s inevitable that us women get caught
out from time to time with a spill. So we
were overjoyed when we heard the words
‘period-proof pants’ – no more washing
hassle or makeshift loo roll pads for us.
“It’s all about empowering women and
sustaining the planet,” says Maria Molland
Selby, CEO of period-solutions company,
THINX. They offer everything from thongs
to gym shorts, made from high-tech, ‘leak
ighting’ material, that can absorb up to two
tampons’ worth in one wear. We can’t wait
to update our knicker drawer. shethinx.com
WASHING WIN
Keeping our clothes fresh
might not be so great for
the ocean – microplastics
released from textiles when
washed are found in more
than 1200 fish species. Try
1200
popping your next load in a
Guppyfriend bag to collect
even the tiniest microfibres.
 MOON
MOVEMENTS
September 23rd is
equinox time, when the
Sun crosses the celestial
equator. In the Northern
Hats of (and on) Hemisphere it’s seen as
the irst day of autumn.
We take our hat off (and she loves them) to Conkers ahoy!
75-year-old style influencer Judith Boyd.
Boyd started her Style Crone blog and Instagram
account for women aged 70+ to tackle the issue
of ageism in society, especially the fashion
industry. Style Crone is “dedicated to the older
woman... in her most creative, outrageous,
authentic, powerful, adventurous, funny and
proud era”. To which we say three cheers.
“We need to make our culture more embracing
of diversity,” says Judith. “If older people aren’t
included, then you don’t really have it.”
Inspired by Judith’s style and joie de vivre? Follow her
on Insta (@stylecrone) or online (www.stylecrone.com).
Photography Blake Jackson
good news
Things to do to live your life well in September & October...
Photography Dexter Fernandes
28-29 FitLiving UK,
SEPTEMBER
the South Coast’s biggest itness
festival is back. It will feature
top trainers, fun itness classes,
demonstrations, wellness brands
and networking events across a
whole weekend of fun – whether
you’re about building your
business or your booty, there’s
something here for you.
www.fitlivinguk.com
1  Aspiring authors, listen
OCTOBER
up! Today is the deadline for
entering Mslexia magazine’s
short story competition, as part
of their Women’s Fiction Awards
2018. The winner will not only get
£5,000, but they will also have
their story published in the mag,
enjoy a week on a writing retreat
and spend a day with an editor.
www.mslexia.co.uk
10 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
23-29 It’s Banned
SEPTEMBER
Book Week; an annual event
celebrating our freedom to
read. This year’s theme is
‘Banning books silences stories’,
reminding us of the value of
speaking out against censorship.
Get involved at an event near
you, or re-read some previously
banned classics – Madame
Bovary is at the top of our list.
SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER
Seed Gathering Season begins
on 23rd September. Each year,
The Tree Council encourages us
to head out into local woodland
and collect seeds and nuts to
plant in our gardens. Not only
will it encourage our local tree
populations, but trees grown
in their native environment are
more likely to thrive.
www.treecouncil.org.uk
28 Today is Macmillan’s The
SEPTEMBER
World’s Biggest Coffee Morning,
a fundraising event to help
people facing cancer. The ask
is simple: host your own coffee
morning and donations on the
day are made to Macmillan. Last
year they raised over £27 million
– get involved this year and help
their cup runneth over.
coffee.macmillan.org.uk
4-7 Olive groves, azure
OCTOBER
waters, quaint harbours; it’s easy
to ind artistic inspiration when
surrounded by Mediterranean
landscapes. The next Artful
Retreats event offers just that
– art creation, therapy and
playfulness to help you discover
yourself through creativity – in
the idyllic island setting of Crete.
www.artfulretreats.com
 GOOD NEWS

Time for tea
Long, sunny days might be ebbing away
but we are all for keeping that lovely
summer feeling going! Team ITM enjoyed
iced tea in the ofice all summer, and
we’ve been inspired by the recipes in the
Good Vibes Cookbook by Jane and
Myles Lamberth (Orca Publications,
£17.99) to keep on drinking them well
into the autumn. Here’s our fave recipe
for fennel, apple and elderflower iced tea:
You will need:
*Fennel Tea
*Fennel fronds (leaves) or dill
*Apple juice (use equal parts fennel
tea and apple juice)
*Splash of elderflower cordial
Method:
1. Make one very strong cup of fennel
tea and allow to cool.
2. Once cool, add the apple juice,
sweeten with elderflower cordial and
pour over ice.
3. Ball up the fennel fronds and place on
top, to serve.
And if the autumn chill does soon arrive,
just wrap a blanket round your shoulders
while you sit and sip!
BREAKFAST
INSPO
If your freezer is
still full after a glut of
summer berries, Jane
and Myles have shared
their favourite fruity
recipes with us. Visit
bit.ly/CMbreakfasts
Trick your tastebuds
Many of us will fondly remember the
day that we irst mastered eating with
chopsticks. But, beyond a valuable life
skill, could they be the key to tastier food?
A group of scientists found that when
they gave a set of subjects chopsticks
to eat a bowl of popcorn with, they
reported higher enjoyment levels and
better-tasting popcorn than another
group who just ate it with their ingers.
They concluded that, whether with
chopsticks or another inventive utensil,
mixing up our eating routines can
actually reset our tastebuds and
enhance our eating experience.

ASMR
WHAT

ASMR (Autonomous Sensory Meridian

Response) is a tingling sensation that we
experience after listening to sounds like
whispering or tapping. Research suggests
it can help us relax and even send us into a
peaceful sleep – find ASMR vids on YouTube.

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 11
good news

HOW I STAY CALM

UNDER PRESSURE

Photography Joyann Boyce

THE START-UP
FOUNDER
Joyann Boyce, 27, is founder of The Social Detail,
a start-up agency that helps SMEs (small to
medium sized businesses) to use social media
to its full potential. Joyann lives in Bristol, UK,
with her mother and a small cactus.
I keep my imposter syndrome in check.
I started my company last June and it’s been a
really steep learning curve. At the beginning I was
doing a lot of networking, but constantly being
around people made me feel anxious and I would
end up comparing myself to them. Now I look at
my diary and cancel things to be alone with my
thoughts if I need to. I ask myself if I’m going to
an event because I want to, or because I feel like
I have to. I also try to only go to things that will
actually be productive to my business.
I’m a fan of casual working.
If I start to feel overwhelmed by my workload,
I make a conscious effort to work in a more casual
way instead. For me, this means doing the aspects
of my job that don’t require a lot of concentration
while I’m sat watching Netflix in the evenings, or
while I’m listening to a podcast. While I am oficially
working, I also feel as though I’m having a break,
and it gets the task done without me even realising.
I have an accountability buddy.
I wanted a mentor to help me stay accountable,
but without a context and the connections, it can
be hard. My friend also has her own business, so
since January we have become ‘accountability
buddies’. We talk every Sunday at 4pm and have
a list of questions to go through. For example, how
do you feel the week went? What was one thing
you learned? What do you want to achieve next
week? We also add little things to ask each other,
such as, “Have you left the house?”. It might sound
obvious, but when you work from home on the
Internet, you can need someone to remind you. We
even do it for going to the gym, which is a fun one!
I use a ‘to-do’ list app.
I love the Asana app. You can set things to repeat,
so if you haven’t done something, it will pop up a
few days later. I know this might give some people
anxiety, but for me it frees up my brain to think
about something else. Working in social media is
fun and creative but it can be repetitive – it’s good
to have that reminder and check things off.

WHAT WE WANT
That’s the number of people who don’t
have access to a toilet. Who Gives A Crap
is an eco-friendly toilet roll company who
build loos and improve sanitation across the
developing world. 50% of profits are donated
to toiletary causes, and each roll is made from
a sustainable material, from bamboo to
recycled paper. Plus, they deliver to your door

billion – no emergency dash to the shops for us.

uk.whogivesacrap.org

12 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
Seeking the Earth Keepers
Once in a while, something comes along that makes you stop,
put down your phone and really listen. Down To Earth is an
award-winning documentary, ilmed and narrated by a Dutch
family who gave up their enviable life in cosmopolitan London
to travel to the ends of the earth.
For ive years, ilmmakers Rolf Winters and Renata Heinen,
along with their three children, journeyed across six continents to
live with some of the oldest indigenous communities on the planet.
Their mission: to gain access to the ‘Earth Keepers’; the medicine
men and women, wisdom keepers, shamans, spiritual leaders and
healers who have retained a natural balance and live in harmony
with their surroundings.
“Down To Earth is a mirror to humanity, a poignant and timely
reflection on our civilized world,” says the couple. “The movie
invites you to see the world through the eyes of the Keepers of the
Earth. [It’s] both a wake-up call and a resurgence of hope for our
world to come.” As a viewer, we travel from the deserts of Kenya
to the Amazonian jungle to an Aboriginal ‘urban earthkeeper’ living
in Sydney. The family discover deep wisdom from their
conversations, not least that in all of us is the power to change our
lives and the lives of others.
Profound, timely, reassuring. Like the ilmmakers, you’ll come
away both changed by the experience and wanting to do more.
Down to Earth is released on 14th September. Watch the trailer, read more and
ind out where you can see it at www.downtoearthilm.com

Photography Down To Earth

 What I do...
“AS A SOCIETY, WE YEARN
FOR CONNECTION AND
A SENSE OF BELONGING;
TO FIND OUR TRIBE”

Aisling Mustan is co-

founder of new health
and wellbeing event
Wild & Well, along with
her three friends: Gemma
Thorogood, Ali Rowe
and Kat Ballam.
“We all met at work,
creating festivals like
Shambala, Bestival and Port Eliot,” says Aisling.
“We love bringing people together to share
incredible experiences. As a society, we yearn
for connection and a sense of belonging; we
want to ind our tribe. So we decided to create
a new kind of festival that would do just that,
taking all the fun of the ield and applying it in
an innovative way.”
For Aisling, the festival programme was key in
creating this sense of community – where people
feel accepted and supported, whatever their
age, shape or itness level. “Whether it’s a silent
disco woodland workout or paddle boarding on
the river, everything we programme is designed
to help people connect,” she explains.
The activities can support attendees in other
ways, too. “I’ve experienced mental health
challenges throughout my life,” says Aisling.
“I’ve spent a lot of time developing a wellbeing
toolkit that works for me – itness, meditation,
yoga, time in nature. I now know that I have this
foundation to come back to when I need it
– it’s incredibly empowering.”
The focus of the event is very much on
keeping that feeling going. “We want people
to leave Wild & Well bursting with ideas and
inspiration,” says Aisling. “We’ll be hosting
events between festivals and creating a
supportive network for them to tap into. Our
irst event is happening in Bristol, but we have
plans to bring the festival to other cities too, to
share it with as many people as possible.”
Wild & Well takes place 20th-21st October, in Bristol, UK.
For more info visit www.wildandwell.org
 good news

Photography trainbodybrain.co.uk

Photography Leighann Renee

Sports day
If you have a teen heading back to
school this month, listen up: Train
Body Brain is a great new initiative
being rolled out in UK schools, not
only to tackle teenage physical health
but mental health too. HIIT classes are 3 great sleeping
on the timetable alongside positive
mantras and meditation techniques.
apps to snooze by
The TBT method is already being Sleep Better (iOS/Android, free)
practised in London schools with Does stress keep you awake? What do
plans to roll it out nationwide by 2020. you eat before bed? Do you scroll under the
www.trainbodybrain.co.uk duvet? This sleep cycle/alarm clock/diary
tracks sleep, improves bedtime habits and
even helps you monitor your dreams.

Pzizz (iOS/Android, free)

Beloved by insomniacs, Pzizz “utilises
effective psychoacoustic principles to create
beautiful dreamscapes” that will help you
fall asleep fast, stay asleep, and wake up
feeling refreshed. We’ve even heard that
Photography Jerico Mandybur

JK Rowling is a fan!

Calm (iOS, Android, free)

The world’s #1 app for mindfulness,
Calm uses daily guided meditations and
breathing exercises to ease stress. They
Spiritual self-care have a whole section dedicated to a good
night’s sleep – thank us after you’ve got
We love a podcast – they're such a great your eight hours in.
way to take a little time out, be inspired,
ind a fresh perspective. We’re over the
moon that Self Service is back for another
FACT OR
FICTION?

season this autumn. This spiritual-meets- “Pets are better

entrepreneurial podcast is ideal for delving than people.”
When it comes to
into your weekly horoscope and learning
a night in, it seems
a thing or two from the best #girlbosses
this is true – a study
around. For a mood boost, recap with the found that 71 percent
last episode of season one, where host of Americans think pets are the
Jerico Mandybur shares a mini meditation best TV watching pals. While we
on shielding yourself from negative energy. can’t tell you to ditch your partner
Find Self Service on iTunes, Stitcher, or Spotify, as well for a pooch, we can guarantee
as our own podcast – search ‘In The Moment’ mag. they won’t give you any spoilers!
Photography Wild & Well

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 15
16 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 YOUR GIFT

We hope you enjoy using your Little Book of Mindfulness to ind a

sense of calm in daily life, with breathing exercises, visualisations
and techniques from wellbeing author Harriet Griffey to help you
along the way. Here are our top tips for making the most of it:

Set aside some time to read the book when you can give it
your full attention – remembering that multi-tasking is a myth!

Pop the book in your bag (it’s the perfect size!) and read one
or two pages whenever you need a quiet moment to reset.

Pick your favourite pages and frame or hang them by your

desk or at home as a visual mindful reminder.

Tap to
download

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 17
A DV E RT I S E M E NT

id you know that Switzerland

has been named one of the
happiest countries on the
planet in the World Happiness
Report six years in a row? Given the alpine
nation’s spectacular scenery and natural
offerings, it’s not really surprising that EMBRACE
its people are so content and boast one SWITZERLAND’S
of the world’s highest life expectancies.
HAPPY WAY OF LIFE
Ricola has been producing delicious
sweets with its unique 13-herb blend in WITH RICOLA
the Swiss alps for more than 80 years, so
it’s fair to say the brand is pretty clued up
on what the country is doing so right.
Like Ricola, Switzerland values and
prioritises people’s health and wellbeing.
In fact, the country’s government makes
everyone take two weeks of their annual
holiday entitlement back to back so they
get a proper break from work and enjoy
some quality downtime. Relaxation is a
key part of the Swiss lifestyle – according
to old laws, it’s even illegal to hang
washing or mow the lawn on Sundays!
Ricola knows how precious nature is
and how important a role it plays in our
sense of happiness, as demonstrated by
the Swiss’ love of the great outdoors.
Blessed with some of the world’s most
breathtaking alpine landscapes on their
doorstep, the people of Switzerland
make the most of their surroundings
all year round, heading to the snowy
mountains in the winter and basking
beside sun-soaked lakes during the
summer. They’re also very friendly
and polite, and make an effort to greet
anyone they cross paths with. If you’d
like to #BeMoreSwiss, why not try this
next time you’re out and about?
Taking a moment to savour one of
Ricola’s calming and refreshing sugar-free
herbal sweets is the perfect way
to get a taste of the Swiss lifestyle.

For more happiness hacks and to take a

quiz to find out how Swiss you already are,
go to ricola.com

Ricola sweets are available to

buy online at ricola.com and in
store from the confectionery
aisle at Holland & Barrett,
Waitrose, Sainsbury’s, WHSmith,
Morrisons, independent health
food stores and pharmacies.
 MAGAZINE

Photography Harold Pereira

SET YOURSELF A CHALLENGE; LOOK AFTER YOUR SKIN

FROM WITHIN; BE INSPIRED BY YOGIS FROM AROUND
THE WORLD AND CHECK IN ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP.
PLUS, MATT HAIG ON LIVING WITH ANXIETY.
 wellbeing

The urge to challenge

ourselves may stem
from our evolutionary
instinct to adapt,
survive and achieve
our full potential.

Setting yourself a goal can be daunting, but
taking small steps towards a bigger achievement
is good for the soul, says Rebecca Hanmer
bout a year ago, I set myself a challenge.
I wanted to shift some pounds and get itter,
so I decided I was going to swim the Channel.
Well, not exactly – over 12 weeks I planned to swim
the distance of the Channel, but in a nice clean pool.
Maybe not quite as impressive, but it felt like the right
challenge for me; an overweight mum in her 40s.
The day of the irst swim came round quickly.
I donned my bathing costume and fancy new goggles
and took the plunge. Thirty minutes later I was
exhausted, exhilarated and 20 lengths nearer my goal
of 1,462 lengths – only another 1,442 to go!
It quickly dawned on me that to get this done I had
to dive in at the deep end. The challenge had been
set and I was determined to crack it. But what was
driving me to strip of in front of strangers at least
three times a week and propel myself through cold
water for hours on end?
I’m not the only one up for this sort of craziness.
I bet you know at least one person who’s training
CHALLENGE YOURSELF
for a half-marathon, or challenging themselves not
to drink booze for a month (both are equally as hard
as far as I’m concerned!). Social media is awash with
people setting challenges. Search for #challenge on
Instagram and you get no less than 9,949,178 posts
at the time of writing!
So why do we set ourselves challenges?
Kimberley Wilson is a chartered psychologist SAFE OCEAN
and self-confessed challenge addict, leading SWIMMING
her to enter and make it to the inal of Surfers Jane and Myles
The Great British Bake Of in 2013. Lamberth start each
According to Kimberley, our evolutionary day with a brisk dip.
instincts are one of the factors at play If you're new to ocean
when it comes to challenging ourselves. swimming, stay safe
“Our survival as a species is based upon with their tips, at
our ability to adapt. Setting challenges and bit.ly/CMseaswim
testing our limits is a part of this – we are
driven to ‘self-actualise’, which means to reach
our full potential,” she explains. “We have the need
for food, shelter and safety, then after that we strive
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 21

wellbeing

for belonging, self-esteem and respect. Then
comes self-actualisation… we are all innately
driven to be the very best that we can be.”
Setting a challenge is also about testing
ourselves, without any element of danger.
“A challenge puts us in contact with parts of
ourselves that we wouldn’t otherwise see,”
she explains. “It is difficult to know how
we’ll manage in extraordinary circumstances.
A challenge can be a safe way to test these
capacities. A manageable amount of stress
or pressure can make you psychologically
stronger and more able to deal with difficult
circumstances in the future.”
As long as our basic needs are met, giving
ourselves a goal can have a positive impact on
our wellbeing. But are small challenges just as
beneicial for our wellbeing as big ones? “Oh
my goodness, yes! Absolutely,” says Kimberley.
“Any challenge is completely personal and
context dependent. You might have someone
who is able to go on stage and speak to
thousands of people, but is terriied of having
an honest conversation with their partner.
Every day in my practice I have the privilege of
seeing people undertake huge challenges that,
from the outside, might look tiny.”
We’re all unique, with diferent needs and
abilities – it’s about stepping out of our own
comfort zone. If you’re a keen cyclist, this
could mean taking on a triathlon. But if you’re
more of a sofa-and-glass-of-wine type, it could
be as simple as walking up the stairs rather
than taking the lift. Whatever it is, it counts!
But, it seems, there’s also a lipside –
sometimes we set challenges that are out of
REBECCA HANMER
Photography Richard Hanmer
Rebecca lives in Bristol along with her husband
Richard and their two children. When not working
towards her challenges, she's a producer on
BBC's Countryile programme.
22 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
Clockwise from right
centre: you might
J@=?D=HHAJCA?D=NP
DAHLBQHSA?=J=HH
OAPKQNKSJLANOKJ=H
tests – whether
EPOOA=OSEIIEJC
I=N=PDKJNQJJEJCKN
=?U?HEJCDKHE@=U
our reach. We line ourselves up to fail and
end up disappointed. “Unrealistic challenges
often come when we are trying to prove
something, either to ourselves or others,”
explains Kimberley. “When you are trying to
prove yourself, there is already a feeling of not
being good enough and the challenge is a bid
to change that opinion. It’s an attempt to justify
your existence.” There’s also difficulty in how
we deine success when setting ourselves a
challenge, says Kimberley. “We talk about
success as if it is one singular thing. People
can ind themselves striving towards what
they’ve been made to believe is success, only
to get there and ind the destination utterly
unfulilling. I certainly think most people are
working too hard to conform to someone else’s
idea of success without interrogating what the
word really means for them.”
I’ll admit that I’m guilty of this – I follow
loads of incredible women on social media
and aspire to be just like them, running
marathons and climbing mountains. So how
does Kimberley think we should go about
choosing the right challenges for ourselves as
individuals? “The barometer should be your
ability to demonstrate self-compassion, to treat
yourself with the same decency and kindness
as you would a friend who was telling the
same story. If your challenge is physical, that
means remembering the importance of rest
days and proper nutrition. If it’s non-physical
 CHALLENGE YOURSELF

Kimberley Wilson is the founder of Monumental

Photography Kimberley Wilson Health, an integrated specialist mental health
clinic in London. She is also the host of the
Food & Psych Podcast. For more details, visit
www.acast.com/foodandpsych

it’s bearing in mind that we all need to pause

and/or ask for help at times – no matter how
‘strong’ and capable we are.”
So, we need to recognise our strengths and
push ourselves, but not too far. We need to
ind a balance and allow ourselves to enjoy the
process and not always focus on the end point.
“The journey can be even more important than
the goal,” adds Kimberley. “There are always
transferable skills and unanticipated beneits
on the way to a destination, whether that’s
learning how to prioritise, developing your
capacity to concentrate, developing physical
and mental resilience… those are the aspects
that will add richness to your life.”
This brings me back to my challenge. Twelve
months after setting my swimming goal, my
lengths-tracker is still stuck on the fridge door,
and every day the 365 lengths I didn’t swim
leap out at me. In 12 weeks, I breast-stroked
my way to more than 1,000 lengths – pretty
impressive for someone who previously only
splashed in a pool every couple of months
with the kids. But I didn’t inish it, and there’s
still a little bit of me that feels I’ve
let myself down. I need to focus on
what I did achieve, though, and how
far I pushed myself – both physically
and mentally.
At some point, I may dive back in
and polish of those few hundred
lengths. But now I want to ind
myself a fresh challenge; one
I can learn new skills from. As
Kimberley says, the journey
is what really matters.
In fact, she’s inspired
me; I might just start
learning to make cakes.
Bake Of here I come!

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 23
wellbeing

WHEN IT COMES TO FINDING THE RIGHT CHALLENGE FOR YOU, THE ACHIEVEMENTS OF
OTHERS CAN BE A GREAT SOURCE OF INSPIRATION (THOUGH NOT COMPARISON!).
MEET SIX AMAZING WOMEN WHO LOVE A CHALLENGE
Photography Natalie Bannister

Photography Anthony Ball

Photography Tara Leaver

@gutsygirls @taraleaver @kikomahews

NATALIE BANNISTER TARA LEAVER KIKO MATTHEWS

Natalie is the founder of Gutsy Girls,
a community of women seeking
adventures, facing fears and having
incredible experiences together.
“Gutsy Girl challenges aim to give
women the opportunity to get out of
their comfort zones, push themselves
and discover how strong and bad-ass
they are in a supportive environment.
“Challenges give us focus and an
outlet away from work and other
life stresses. They help us grow
as individuals as they make us
accountable for something. The
resilience we take from them, we can
transfer to our everyday lives.
“It’s all about the journey leading
up to the challenge and supporting
each other. Challenges shouldn’t be
a competition. Choose something you
like and enjoy the process, it should
be about friendship and having fun.”
Tara is an artist and online art teacher
who runs weekly art challenges.
“I think challenges are a super
way to get yourself taking action on
something that’s important to you,
whether that’s creatively or for itness
or any other reason – especially
if you’re the sort of person who
thrives with a bit of guidance and
accountability alongside the space to
make autonomous decisions.
“Over and over, on Instagram, I’ve
seen people surprise themselves
with what they’re capable of, grow in
conidence, make new friends, develop
seeds of ideas into bigger projects,
create work that has then sold; and not
only make art they love, but thoroughly
enjoy the process too. A challenge can
be as demanding or as gentle as you
like, and it’s a very low-pressure way
to experiment with ideas.”
Kiko is an educator, challenge-
seeker, adventurer and founder of
charity The Big Stand. Despite
being diagnosed with Cushing’s
disease in 2009 (a syndrome causing
very high levels of the hormone
cortisol in the body, causing a range
of symptoms, which can include high
blood pressure and muscle weakness),
she recently set a record as the fastest
woman to row the Atlantic solo.
“When we challenge ourselves, we
leave our comfort zone. I don’t know
what I’m good at until I try it, what
I like until I give it a go or who my
friends are until I meet them.
“Challenging yourself teaches you
perspective, to be ok with failure, to
let go of fear and to grow. It helps
you become you and when you’re
you, you become happy and it’s then
you can really make a diference.”

24 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 CHALLENGE YOURSELF

Photography Chantelle Ellem

Photography Emily Tonge

@fatmulim @bonitanr @ we_run_diabetс

CHANTELLE ELLEM BONITA NORRIS EMMA COLLINS

Also known as Fat Mum Slim, Chantelle Bonita was the youngest person in Eighteen months ago, London-based
was the irst person to set a ‘Photo A the world to climb Mount Everest Emma took up running and now
Day’ challenge on Instagram. and to reach the North Pole. completes marathons despite her
“Personally, I don’t want to be “I take on challenges for diferent type 1 diabetes diagnosis.
stagnant. I love to keep growing and reasons but mostly because I want to “Do something every day that
evolving and challenging myself, and push myself, ind out what I’m capable scares you – you regret more the
Photo A Day is one way to do that. of, go into that unknown. I love that things you don’t do than the things
It’s such a positive movement. It feeling of being truly connected – to you do. Challenge yourself, prove
encourages you to take a moment nature, the tribe and ourselves. It’s that that you can do whatever you put
each day to take a photo, which leads connection that makes us feel alive. your mind to.
to gratefulness, being present and And what is life about but to be alive? “As a type one, I want to prove
inding joy in each day. “I don’t think leading by example to myself and others that health
“Almost 30 million photos have and just ‘being out there’ on social and other
been shared so far in the Photo A Day media as an adventurer is enough. challenges don’t
challenge, and six years on it’s still You need to make the efort to sit in have to stop
going strong. For me, the community front of people, engage with them and you – each time
around Photo A Day has been the challenge their belief system. I make you hit a hurdle
best perk. People from all over the a real efort to speak in schools – over keep going, getting
world have found new friends, and 200 to date. I try to inspire young around any
some have even lown across the people to believe in themselves, follow obstacles makes
globe to meet each other. That’s their own path and not give up when it an even greater
pretty special.” life gets tough.” accomplishment.”
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wellbeing

STAYING ON TOP
When things feel overwhelming, take a moment to reflect and you’ll soon be back on track
Words: Harriet Grifey / Illustration: Amelia Flower

owever well organised we are, there are times
when events seem to conspire to overwhelm even
the most resilient of us. We may pride ourselves
on our ability to juggle, to be constantly available and on
top of things, but this can sometimes mask underlying
anxiety, or an inability to delegate or just say no. Then,
feelings of being overwhelmed can sometimes result.
But what tips the balance between managing things and
not? This is very individual and can even vary from day
to day. It might come from literally having too much to
do, an emotional reaction to something that’s happened,
or an insidious creep of circumstances. But regardless of
what causes these feelings, the trick is to be self-aware, to
recognise if things are mounting up, and take a step back
rather than get to a point where it’s all too much.
Work/life balance, for example, is very subjective. What
hits the spot for one person won’t be as useful for another,
so making comparisons can be really unhelpful and can
exacerbate feeling overwhelmed. We all have diferent
priorities. If buying all the school uniform for the next
academic year by the end of July makes you feel on top
of things, then that’s great; but it’s not necessarily where
everyone’s energies lie.
I often think of the Nelson Mandela quote: “It always
seems impossible until it is done.” I ind it a useful
reminder when I’m feeling overwhelmed to just pause,
think it through, break it down into manageable chunks,
and put one foot in front of the other until the task is done.
Another tactic I ind useful, when anticipating something
I’m anxious about, is to remind myself that I have done
things like this before and will reach the other side.
However, on that journey, things can crop up that bring
your feelings of being overwhelmed back to the surface.
Not being able to say no is one of them; for some of us,
this is really tricky. Often we feel obliged to say yes when
we already have enough on our plate, we don’t have the
right skill set, or someone is asking too much of us – and
saying no would be the more realistic option. Learning
to say no, diplomatically, gracefully, tactfully, is so much
better for both you and the other person, and will keep
you free to focus on the initial task.
Asking for help is another thing many of us struggle
with. Perhaps we’re worried about seeming incapable, or
fear being refused, but often a task that feels overwhelming
could be easier to face with a little aid. Knowing when you
need a helping hand isn’t a sign of weakness; it shows that
you know your own strengths and those of others around
you. Many people will happily do what they can to help
out – and you might be able to reciprocate at some point.
Accepting our capabilities also helps us to deal with
unrealistic self-expectations. Often we think we can
accomplish more than is feasibly possible, or we don’t
factor in how long it will actually take. Whether we
promise this to ourselves, or others, we can then feel
a huge sense of failure as we realise we won’t get the task
done by the deadline we set. This can lead us to feel more
overwhelmed by the idea of inishing the task, or doing
it again in the future. Instead, when you start something,
carefully think through all of the factors involved and how
long each will take to do. Bear all these things in mind,
have a plan B, and be realistic about the promises you
make to yourself and others.
Finally, I always try to keep at least one day a week clear
of any commitments – a day when I know I can wake up
and do whatever I want, on my terms. It makes me feel as
if I have at least some control over my life, and because
I’m the one in charge, I know there’s not going to be even
a hint of feeling overwhelmed to get in my way.

HARRIET GRIFFEY is a writer, journalist and author of

over 20 books on health and wellbeing. Her latest title,
I Want to Be Creative (Hardie Grant, £7.99), is out now.

28 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 wellbeing

We can take care

of our skin both
on the outside
and on the inside.
 NATURAL SKINCARE

Many of us suffer with skin conditions that we’ve tried everything to

remedy, but looking after our gut could make all the difference

Words: Janey Lee Grace

s frustrating as it is to be past your teenage years and

still sufering with breakouts, the reality is that a huge
number of women sufer from skin problems. From
spots and acne to eczema, rosacea, psoriasis and dermatitis,
there can be a lot happening on the outside that we’re not
happy about. But according to leading experts, not all of
the above are actually skin conditions – they are, in fact,
autoimmune disorders that are a direct result of problems
with our gut bacteria. And while topical applications do have
some success, in order to fully and permanently resolve our
skin issues, we need to heal our gut.
It seems as though the microbiome has its own publicist
at the moment; we’re all becoming more aware of the
importance of good bacteria in the gut, and many of us are
realising that we are sufering from microbiome damage.
Shann Nix Jones is the best-selling author of The Good Skin
Solution and founder of Chuckling Goat (www.chuckling
goat.co.uk), a company that sells goats’ milk products.
She says that this microbiome damage is the result of what
she calls ‘The Four Horsemen of the Gut Apocalypse’:
antibiotics, sugar, stress and environmental toxins. These
damage your good gut bacteria – rather like pouring bleach
into a river kills the ish.

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 31
 wellbeing

There is now cutting-edge

scientiic research to prove what
SKIN DEEP
It’s thought that Shann has long believed.
we absorb up to 60 A study from Cedars-Sinai
percent of anything Medical Centre in the US
applied to our skin. found that damage to our

Photography Shann Nix Jones

Each year, the average microbiome is a key
woman can take in up contributor to many
to 2kg of chemicals diferent problems, both
this way. www.soil internally and externally. In
association.org our gut, it may feel like Irritable
Bowel Syndrome (IBS), or give us
digestive problems. On our skin, it can
look like eczema or acne. It can even result in
allergies and sinus problems.
Most of us go about trying to sort out our
skin conditions by applying diferent lotions
and potions to clear up the breakouts. Having
facials, skin peels and all manner of treatments
can help in the short-term, and might make
skin conditions look less ‘angry’, but soon
enough – because we haven’t sorted out the
issue from within – those problems will return,
often accompanied by bloating, pain, fatigue,
digestive issues and even depression.
Shann believes that when we heal the gut, we
can resolve all of these symptoms in one go.
“Healing your gut is a lot like restoring a
natural ecosystem that has been damaged,”
Photography Annie Spratt

she explains. “You need to trickle those ‘good

bugs’ in gradually over time, to bring the system
back to life – and consuming fermented foods
is the safest and most efective way to do that.”
For Shann, a powerful probiotic drink called
keir is her preference. Originally from the
Caucasus Mountains in West Asia, it is made contains beneicial bacteria that have a
by fermenting milk with active keir grains, and positive efect on the gut-brain connection.
is similar to yogurt, with a tart, slightly izzy In US medical journal Trends in Neurosciences,
taste. Although traditionally made from cow’s psychobiotics are described as exerting
milk, Shann recommends goat’s milk keir. “antidepressant efects characterised by
“All milk provides the most powerful base for changes in emotional, cognitive, systemic
probiotics,” she says, “but goat’s milk is the and neural indices”. In other words, these
most hypoallergenic and most easily tolerated probiotics boost our moods, as well as our
of all the animal milks. It does not contain the brain function and overall health.
[protein] A1 casein that makes cow’s milk such Betsan Evans, a photographer from Wales,
a strong allergen for many people.” had some acne as a teenager, but it was only
Keir is also a ‘psychobiotic’, meaning that it when she turned 30 that she started to sufer

32 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 NATURAL SKINCARE

Ingredients that
can irritate
WHAT NOT TO PUT ON YOUR SKIN

* SYNTHETIC SKINCARE
It can be dificult to know
the origins of the products
used in our skincare routine.
“There’s no need to use
synthetic ingredients on our
skin,” says Rebecca Martin,
creator of Conscious Skincare handmade products
(www.conscious-skincare.com). “There are always
alternatives. Nature, as usual, can offer something
just as good – I use a vegan-friendly version of
hyaluronic acid made from recognisable natural
ingredients, such as brewer’s yeast.”

* CHEMICAL IRRITANTS
Many chemical skincare
ingredients are actually
known irritants; these
include sodium laurel
sulphates, artiicial
fragrances, parabens,
preservatives and phthalates. It’s easy to identify
them on labels – look for products that don’t
contain them.

* WATER WOES
Clockwise from top left: In the quest for calming
Shann Nix Jones is a farmer, our irritated skin, even
GANLNK@Q?AN=J@SAHH>AEJC for babies and children,
=QPDKN1D=JJQOAOCK=POIEHG one factor that’s often
PKI=GAGAN=OEPOPDAIKOP forgotten is the water we
DULK=HHANCAJE?=JEI=HIEHG use to bathe in. It’s full of
I=JULAKLHA@KJPNA=HEOAPD=P chlorine, which is extremely drying for the skin.
PDADA=HPDKBPDAENCQPEIL=?PO An easy ix is to use a ilter. The Sensitive Skincare
@ENA?PHUKJPDAENOGEJ1D=JJO Company (www.sensitiveskincareco.com) make
JAS>KKG 2DA)AN1KHQPEKJ a de-chlorination ilter that its onto a shower
&=U&KQOA £
EOKQPJKS attachment, or a ball to hang from your bath taps
to ilter as you go.

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 33
 wellbeing
with serious skin issues. Around that time,
she was also dealing with acute stress, having
recently lost three members of her family,
as well as juggling three jobs and a course.
“I sought help from a GP and a dermatologist
and was prescribed antibiotics and several
diferent topical creams, but nothing worked,”
says Betsan. “In fact, they made my skin worse.”
She began to look for alternatives, and
started to learn more about her microbiome.
“At irst, when I heard about keir and how it
could help with skin issues, I was on a strict
no-dairy diet, so I ruled out the idea,” she says.
But a year later, after doing more research,
Betsan realised that it was likely she was
sufering from a leaky gut and that one of the
best treatments was keir. She decided to give
it a try. “I couldn’t believe the diference it
made,” she says. “My skin is better now than
it’s ever been.” She applies keir skincare too,
and avoids conventional soap, preferring to
make her own face washes using natural
castile (olive oil-based) soap and
essential oils.
HONEY HELP
But she is wary of
Honey’s anti-fungal
attributing everything to
and antibacterial
properties mean it’s drinking keir: “It’s not
great for soothing acne just the keir, it’s not just
as a face mask. It’s also the lotions, it’s also about
efective for digestive getting your diet right,”
problems such as peptic she says. Betsan drinks
ulcers. www.honey 170ml of goat’s milk keir
association.com every day and follows a low-
GI (low glycemic) diet, free from
gluten and reined sugar, to keep her
blood-sugar levels steady. It’s the combination
of her diet and skincare routine that she
believes has made such a diference to both
her skin and her overall health.
Shann agrees: “Natural healing is slow,
and takes time. The length of time required
depends on the severity of the dysbiosis (the
term for an imbalance of microbes, or ‘good’
bacteria, in your gut) and how long-standing
the issue is. It can take nine months to a year
to deal with severe autoimmune issues.”
If you are considering introducing keir
34 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
to your diet, Shann advises building up the
amount you take gradually. “Because keir is so
powerful, it is best to begin slowly: I suggest
starting with just one tablespoon per day, and
work up to 170ml over time,” she says. Keir
is also safe during pregnancy, and can be taken
by babies after the age of four months.
“A study by the Norwegian University of
Science and Technology found that taking
probiotics during pregnancy decreased the
chances of a baby being born with eczema by
nearly half,” says Shann. “The good news is
that with keir, unlike chemical medications,
all the side efects are beneicial.”
Simple food swaps can also help with skin
issues. Eating good fats, like walnuts, salmon
and avocado can reduce inlammation and
help to speed up healing. Fresh fruits and veg,
especially dark green leafy vegetables, are also
key to support the good bacteria in your gut.
You could also make your own skincare
saviours to use alongside keir. These can
combat speciic issues or simply soothe your
skin, and they’re easy to make at home – all
you need are some containers, a blender and
some good raw ingredients, many of which
Photography Phil Sowels
can be found in your kitchen cupboard.
If you like your porridge smooth, chances
are you’ll have some ine oatmeal to hand.
This is incredibly soothing for the skin.
It has antioxidant and anti-inlammatory
properties and will soak up excess oil to
help treat acne. Ground almonds are great
for gentle exfoliating, and also provide oils
beneicial for the skin. Almonds also contain
vitamin E, which is rejuvenating and soothing.
Meanwhile, sea salt is perfect for adding to
olive oil to make a facial scrub to remove dead
skin cells and get that glowing feeling. The
citrus oils found in lemon or orange juice can
act as mild astringents for oily skins, while
raw extra virgin coconut oil can be used as
a moisturiser for face and body (as well as
an intensive hair conditioner).
If you’re in need of inspiration, look to the
next page to ind a simple recipe that you
can adapt to suit your skin and its needs.
Photography Betsan Evans
 Choose an essential oil that
suits your skin and add it to NATURAL SKINCARE
your natural beauty recipes.
Below left to right: Betsan
developed skin problems in her
30s; taking care of her
gut soothed her skin.

Anti-ageing oil
SOOTHE YOUR SKIN WITH THIS SIMPLE RECIPE

METHOD
Mix the rosehip oil into the sweet almond oil to make your base, then add the
drops of lavender, rose and frankincense oils. Pour into a small glass bottle
(preferably one with a pipette) and use sparingly. It smells divine!

Ingredients
* 50ml sweet almond oil * 2 drops of lavender oil
(as a base) * 2 drops of rose oil
* 50ml rosehip oil * 1 drop of frankincense oil

A TREAT FOR THE FACE

It’s especially easy to make facial oils at home. These are excellent for restoring
the hydrolipidic ilm, a light protective layer that covers your skin. Plant-based
oils nourish the skin’s layers, and you can add a drop of essential oil to make
your own bespoke oil for however you are feeling. For example, if you feel a cold
coming on, add a drop of eucalyptus oil, or if your period is due, add a few
drops of soothing rose. The recipe above is for an anti-ageing oil that you can
mix at home to soothe and rejuvenate.
 wellbeing

SUPERFOOD
BEAUTY
What we eat can do wonders – both on the
inside and the outside. Here, we’ve picked
products made from our favourite natural
ingredients to nourish and restore
Photography Phil Sowels

Words: Bethan Rose Jenkins


Cleansing miracle
Avocado, it turns out, isn’t just for eating
on toast. The healthy fats and vitamins
of millennials’ favourite food helps
to both hydrate and repair skin cells.
The Avo Bao Cleansing Balm from
Bodhi & Birch is a sell-out make-up
remover, boasting avocado as its main
ingredient. It also contains a host of
other nutrient-packed goodies, and is
100% natural, vegan and cruelty-free.
£55 www.bodhiandbirch.co.uk
Tea for your T-zone
Green tea might be your afternoon
saviour, but putting it on your face
could bring even more comfort than
your 3pm cuppa. Green People’s new
Organic Young skincare range uses
a whole host of superfood ingredients
to soothe and calm stressed and spot-
prone skin. Thanks to its antibacterial
properties, their cleansing moisturiser
includes green tea to help balance skin.
From £11 www.greenpeople.co.uk
Ingenious grains
Bursting with probiotic bacteria, kefir
is the skincare superfood du jour.
Often fermented into a milk drink, kefir
is also said to do wonders for psoriasis
and eczema. Paired with goats’ milk
and essential oils, Chuckling Goat’s
Kefir Lotion is the perfect pick-me-up
for tired skin, while its Kefir Cleanser
promises to exfoliate and moisturise
your face, body and hands.
From £8.25 www.chucklinggoat.co.uk
Make-up marvel
Used in herbal medicine for centuries,
the nutritious moringa plant has now
become a beauty product essential.
A natural harbourer of vitamin A,
moringa aids cell renewal, while fatty
acids help hydrate the skin. Magical
Moringa Primer, made by anti-animal
testing and anti-packaging brand
Lush, promises to soften skin and
provide a matte base for foundation.
£25.95 www.lush.com
SHOPPING
Amazing algae
Algae may not be the first substance
that springs to mind for your skincare,
but protein-rich spirulina is packed with
vitamins and works as a natural
toner. In Sukin’s Super Greens Facial
Recovery Serum, spirulina is paired
with fellow green powerhouse kale,
which helps tighten the skin and
reduce under-eye circles to promote
a healthy, youthful glow.
£13.95 www.planetorganic.com
Infallible fruit
The kakadu plum is all set to upstage
oranges as the richest source of
vitamin C. Said to improve acne and
uneven skin tones and shield skin
from pollution, it’s a key ingredient
in botanical brand Oilixia’s Gummy
Facial Cleanser. Including nourishing
macadamia oil and antibacterial
eucalyptus oil too, it lifts off impurities,
leaving skin clean and protected.
£24 www.oilixiaskincare.com
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 37
wellbeing
FOUNDED BY THE ANCIENT GREEKS, STOICISM
WAS ALSO PRACTICED BY ROMAN PHILOSOPHER
SENECA, AND USED BY ROMAN EMPEROR MARCUS
AURELIUS AS A WAY TO OVERCOME STRIFE AND
TURN TROUBLES INTO TRIUMPH. TAKE JULIA WILLS’
QUIZ, THEN TURN THE PAGE FOR PRACTICAL TIPS
ON HOW TO KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON...
YOU’RE IN A RUSH AT
THE SUPERMARKET.
UNFORTUNATELY, THE
CUSTOMER IN FRONT OF YOU
HAS A PROBLEM WITH THEIR
CARD PAYMENT AND NO
ASSISTANT APPEARS WHEN
THE CASHIER RINGS THE BELL.
WHAT DO YOU DO?
A Fling your basket down noisily and
harrumph out of the store without
what you came for.
B Complain loudly about how annoying
the situation is to the people behind
you in the queue.
C Take a deep breath. The shop is
busy and someone will sort it out
in a minute.
HOW MUCH DO YOU AGREE
WITH THE STATEMENT:
38 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
“LIFE IS ALL ABOUT HOW YOU
LOOK AT IT”?
A Not at all.
B It depends on the situation.
C This is my life mantra.
YOUR FRIEND SAYS THAT
A MUTUAL FRIEND HAS BEEN
BAD-MOUTHING YOU.
YOU DECIDE TO:
A Immediately drop the mutual friend,
without an explanation. You don’t
need that negative energy in your life.
B Start bad-mouthing your mutual
friend; you never really liked her
anyway and clearly this is the nature
of the friendship now.
C Wonder what the problem might be
and, remembering what a good
friend she has been in the past, talk
to her about it.
A COLLEAGUE IS PROMOTED
OVER YOU WHEN YOU FELT
YOU TOTALLY DESERVED
THE JOB. DO YOU:
A Hand in your notice the next day.
Who wants to work for a company
that doesn’t value you?
B Try to undermine your promoted
colleague whenever you can, to point
out her flaws to management.
C Feel disappointed but accept the
situation and talk to your manager
about how you can gain more skills
so that next time, it’ll be you.
YOU MISLAY YOUR PHONE
AND NEED TO LEAVE FOR AN
APPOINTMENT. YOUR FIRST
THOUGHT IS:
A I’m totally useless. I’m always losing
things.
 STOICISM

Score your answers

Score 13 points or fewer
Often, life’s anxieties and stress may
seem overwhelming and we can find
ourselves making decisions when
we’re not at our best, making matters
worse. So, the next time the computer
throws a wobbly or someone lets you
down, be a little kinder to yourself.
Acknowledge your emotions – they’re
certainly important – but give yourself
some breathing space. When you pause
to think, you’ll discover you have other
options. And by picking one of them,
things may turn out better than expected.

Score between 14 and 19

Setbacks can make you feel singled-
out and you have a tendency to take
problems personally. Try to remember
that everyone has their fair share of
frustrations, and while the things that
happen are often out of your control,
the way you choose to deal with
A = 2 points them isn’t. So, the next time

B = 3 points you’re stuck on a late train or you

pick a slow supermarket queue,
C = 4 points remember that no one’s trying
to annoy you. Keeping a calm
B Why has this head will allow you to consider your
happened to options to get through the delay as
me now? I so swiftly as possible, or just enjoy the view.
don’t need this!
“We cannot choose C When did I have it last? Score 19 or more
Seneca, step aside! When it comes
our external YOU ARE STUCK ON A
LATE-RUNNING TRAIN ON
to keeping calm and carrying on, you
have this licked. Your cucumber-cool
circumstances, YOUR WAY HOME. IT’S THE
THIRD TIME THIS WEEK. ALL
approach means that you can consider
the problem objectively and decide
but we can always AROUND YOU PEOPLE ARE
COMPLAINING. DO YOU:
on your best option without going into
meltdown. Even better, you may turn
choose how we A Rage at the ticket collector – they
are a representative of the lousy train
a bad result into something to learn
from. That being said, be careful
respond to them.” company, after all. that others don’t take advantage of
knowing that you will react well to most
B Drum your fingers, huff and sigh loudly.
Epictetus, Greek Stoic This always happens to you, and now situations. If something has happened
philosopher your evening is ruined. that is unfair to you, raise your concerns
C Carry on reading your book. You’d just in a calm but firm way.
got to a good bit and it’s nice to have
some extra time to enjoy it.

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 39
wellbeing
STOICISM MIGHT HAVE STARTED WITH
THE THINKERS OF ANCIENT GREECE AND
ROME, BUT THERE’S NOTHING DUSTY
ABOUT THEIR APPROACH. JULIA WILLS
SHOWS YOU HOW TO TAKE A LEAF FROM
THEIR BOOK OF CHILL TO HELP YOU COPE
WITH THE STRESSES OF MODERN LIFE
HISTORY CLASS
History is studded with stoics; those inspiring thinkers,
inventors and leaders who adapted their perception, actions
and will in order to succeed. Historians even believe that
many of these people wouldn’t have risen to greatness at all
without a whole load of woe to wade through.
Abraham Lincoln’s lifelong battle with depression is
believed to have given him the tenacity and courage to
fight slavery in the US. Edison’s commitment to hard work,
epitomised in his famous remark, “I have not failed, I’ve just
found 10,000 ways that won’t work,” made him America’s
greatest inventor. And Suffragettes, such as Emmeline
Pankhurst, endured imprisonment, violence and ridicule to
ultimately change history for women.
Using adversity as a source of strength can be seen in the
triumphs of our modern paralympians and injured military
heroes too, and closer to home in our own empathetic
responses to humanitarian crises and terrorist incidents.
It seems we all have the ability to respond to even the worst
of events with something powerfully constructive.
40 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
RIDE THE WAVES
Jon Kabat-Zinn, the mindfulness expert,
said of life, “You can’t stop the waves, but
you can learn to surf”. We can’t splash out
into the sea and ride right back to shore first
time. First we must develop our core muscles
and balance, build resilience to going
underwater and shake off any bruises and
wet sand we endure. Stoicism is like surfing.
It takes persistence and practice. We face
both big waves and no waves in life, we go
under and we come up again gasping. With
determination, we get back on the board.
Sometimes the waves are violent, we are
hurt and it takes us time to recover. But each
time we clamber up again we’ve learned
something new. Perhaps something practical,
but more likely something about ourselves.
And, like the determined surfer, we can pick
up our board, wiser, ready for the next wave.
 STOICISM

PUT IT INTO PRACTICE

It’s natural to feel rattled by life’s problems. After all, our
survival on this planet is down to ancestors who were
hardwired to fight or flight when danger was imminent.
We’re still geared to respond to any threat like startled
pheasants. However, it’s worth remembering that
pheasants often run out into the road. We don’t have to
– instead, we can switch to stoic. In his inspirational book,
The Obstacle is the Way, media strategist Ryan Holiday,
(whose ideas are used by Twitter and Google) distils the
philosophy into three practical steps that anyone can
apply in their everyday lives.

PERCEPTION
However much you might flap and yap, the
problem really hasn’t arisen from fate, bad
luck, destiny, the ‘fact’ that this sort of thing
always happens to you, or the alignment of
“Fortune can take the stars in the sky. It’s an event, making it
away riches, but as indifferent as the rain. And as soon as you
ditch your diva and start to see it that way,
not courage.” your options increase.
Seneca
ACTION
Once you’ve taken that irst healthy step
back by changing how you look at the crisis, Holiday
emphasises choosing the ‘right action’ to deal with it.
Simply put, that’s doing something that is actually likely
to help. Next time you’re faced with frustration, think
through the problem logically. ‘Would swallowing my pride
lead to a better outcome? Can I break the problem down
“Grant me the into smaller steps? Should I try again? Could I settle for
something short-term in order to achieve my long-term
serenity to accept goal?’ Once you’ve considered all of these things, you’ll
know which is the right action to take. And, remember,
the things I cannot even deciding to do nothing may be the best option.

change, courage to WILL

Perception and the right action often lead to success
change the things when things go wrong, but sometimes the problem is
bigger than we are. And this is where the stoic’s third, and
I can and wisdom to perhaps most valuable, step comes in. Will – the ability to
accept that there are times when you can’t make things
know the diference.”  better and that simply wishing with all your heart that you
could isn’t going to change a thing. Everyone has problems
Serenity Prayer like this. That’s life. But, as Holiday points out, it is in
accepting our limitations and adjusting to them that we
are able to learn and keep going.

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 41
 wellbeing

Struggling to switch
off can be a sign that
it's time to take a
break from technology.

What is modern life and new technology doing to our brains and our bodies?
Matt Haig tells us about his new book, Notes on a Nervous Planet
Words: Sarah Orme
ver picked up your phone and found that
you’ve lost track of time while you scroll
through your Instagram feed? That’s just
one of the ways that technology is taking over our
lives, according to author Matt Haig.
“It’s very hard to stay mindful in contemporary
life because we’ve got so many things to check,”
he says. “We’re overloaded with everything –
books, magazines, TV shows, friends. We’re more
connected than ever before and we’ve got so many
options. It can be hard to step back and remember
who we are, but it’s certainly possible.”
In recent years, our relationship with technology
has changed radically and it’s easy to develop a social
media addiction. “I’ve deinitely been addicted to my
phone,” admits Matt. “I always charged my phone
by the bed, so I would wake up and check my emails,
check my Twitter and Instagram, check the news and
end up just scrolling aimlessly for ages – suddenly,
that’s an hour of my day gone. Then you’re not
eating breakfast at the right time and everything’s
a bit more delayed. It just swallows up time.” In
Matt’s case, this compulsive checking and scrolling
triggered anxiety attacks. “I used to get anxiety when
I’d been on the computer too much, but I didn’t
realise that it had anything to do with it,” he says.
Surprisingly, this kind of fascination with our
technology is far from new. Matt tells the story of
17th century diarist Samuel Pepys who treated
MATT HAIG
himself to a new pocket watch: “He couldn’t stop
taking it out of his pocket – he was obsessed with
telling the time. As we do with our smart phones,
Pepys was constantly checking it and he ended up
giving it up because it was driving him crazy.”
Social media can also damage our self-esteem.
When we’re online, it’s tempting to compare
ourselves to others. Matt says the problem is that
you’re looking at the perfect parts of other people’s
lives – the carefully-presented parts. “We’ve become
magazines of ourselves and our own little personal
fan clubs of ourselves. We can always see and feel our
worst bits, but we’re looking at everyone else’s best
bits,” he says. When we relect on our best moments,
they’re often not captured by a photograph because
we were too busy enjoying ourselves. “Someone
who is Instagramming about a great experience isn’t
necessarily having a great experience,” he adds.
It can be difficult to ind a balance between the
beneits of technology and the impact on our health.
There are some positives: social media allows us to
ind support when we’re struggling with our mental
health and to ind our own tribes online. “When
I irst became ill with depression and anxiety, which
was before the age of social media, I kind of wish I’d
had it,” Matt says. “One of the things, certainly when
you feel bad in life, is that you often feel very alone.”
Matt is very aware of his own mental health. At the
age of 24, he became depressed and anxious, which
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 43
wellbeing
led him to attempt suicide. During his recovery,
he struggled with panic attacks, which could
be triggered by something as small as a walk
to the shops.
“I used to be really bad at supermarkets
when I irst had anxiety. The irst diagnosis
I ever got was panic disorder, which basically
means you’re having panic attacks a lot, and
when you’re not having them, you’re just
anticipating the next one. Even when I got
over that, I would have the occasional panic
attack, often in supermarkets,” he says. “We
were living in Leeds at the time. We would
go to the local Morrisons and I’d be OK and
feeling quite strong, but within ive minutes of
being inside, I would panic and get stressed.
There were lots of things that could trigger it
– there’s the artiicial lighting, for one. A lot
of supermarkets don’t have any natural light.”
Supermarkets are a common anxiety trigger
because the environment is overstimulating.
Everywhere you look, branding competes
for your attention. “You’re in the ultimate
consumer environment, being presented with
everything that you could be buying,” explains
Matt. “Our consumer choices aren’t just about
what we need to eat, they’re choices about who
we are. We’re basically surrounded by a million
life choices when we go into a supermarket.”
Too much choice can be another trigger
for anxiety. Matt recalls that when his mental
health was poor, even choosing what to wear
in the morning was a stressful experience.
“I can remember when I was really depressed,
all those daily decisions were so hard. You
can just sit there staring at your sock drawer
MATT HAIG
Matt is a novelist and non-fiction author. His deeply
moving memoir about his journey back from the
brink of severe depression, Reasons to Stay Alive,
is a number one bestseller. www.matthaig.com
44 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
wondering what to wear.” The philosopher
Soren Kierkegaard once referred to anxiety as
‘the dizziness of freedom’, and it does seem
that having too much choice can make us tense,
even if our mental health is generally good.
Keeping calm in modern life is difficult and
even our sleep is under threat from a surprising
source. “I love watching Netlix and streaming
TV shows, but that’s having an impact on our
sleep. Recently the head of Netlix said that his
main competitor isn’t another TV company –
it’s sleep,” says Matt. “Sleep is where they can
make their money. If people aren’t going to bed
until 2am because they’re watching the latest
show, that will boost their business model.”
Gadgets can also stop us from falling asleep –
the blue light emitted by our screens disrupts
our circadian rhythms and makes it harder to
nod of. If you’re in the habit of giving your
phone one last check before bed, it might be
a good idea to give yourself a phone curfew.
“The World Health Organisation – which has
declared a sleep loss epidemic in industrialised
nations – recommends that we sleep for seven
to nine hours a night. But not that many of us
do,” Matt says. And this lack of sleep inevitably
afects our mental and physical health. “In
another 150,000 generations humans might
evolve and adapt to unnatural light, but right
now our bodies and minds are still the same
bodies and minds of those humans who existed
before Edison patented his lightbulb. In other
words, we need our sleep.”
When Matt became aware of how badly his
phone was disrupting his sleep, he realised
he had to make some changes in his life and
learn to disconnect. He admits that he hasn’t
found this easy. He used to get separation
anxiety when he couldn’t get hold of his
 Clockwise from top:
using gadgets before MATT HAIG
bed can hinder sleep;
Matt reminds himself to
disconnect with a witty
poem; have we become too
attached to technology?

partner, Andrea, and he found it difficult to be

on his own: “We think that phones have made
that better, but it’s actually made it worse,
because now if I phone someone and I can’t
get through then I’ll start to worry about them.
If I’m out without my phone, I think: ‘What
could happen? I could suddenly have a heart
attack and what would I do?’” In the past, we
wouldn’t have worried too much if we couldn’t
reach someone, but now if we’re not able to get
through, it can make us panic.
For thousands of generations we’ve managed
without this technology, and Matt inds it
strange how quickly we’ve come to depend
on it. It’s now become a burden, when it
was always intended to make our lives easier.
“Despite all the devices and technology we’ve
created, we don’t seem to have any more time,”
he comments. “The fact that we’re so easy
to contact as well has changed how we work.
Weekends, for instance, used to be a sacred
space where no one contacted you. Now it’s
not abnormal to get work emails on a Sunday,
or any time of the week. We’re not here to
serve technology. We’re not here to serve work.
They’re both there to serve us, collectively.
There’s sometimes a risk in losing that.”
So how do we disconnect ourselves from the
situations in modern life that can trigger
anxiety? For Matt, it’s the simple things that
can make a real diference. He advises literally
disconnecting: “Go for a walk, without taking
your phone. I found that even during times
when I was meant to be relaxing, or in the
zone – like walking the dog – I’d be constantly
checking. It’s amazing what even a small
amount of time away from technology does.
It allows you to reconnect with yourself.”

Number one bestseller

Notes on a Nervous
Planet by Matt Haig
(Canongate, £12.99),
is out now.

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 45
Photography Stil
wellbeing
How to exist in the 21st century
and not have a panic attack
MATT HAIG SHARES HIS TRIED AND TESTED ADVICE
CHECK IN
Keep an eye on yourself. Be your
own friend. Be your own parent.
Be kind to yourself. Check on
what you are doing. Do you need
to watch the last episode of the
series when it is after midnight?
Do you need that third or fourth
glass of wine? Is that really in
your best interests?
INHALE, EXHALE
Breathe. Breathe deep and pure
and smooth. Concentrate on it.
Breathing is the pace you set your
life at. It’s the rhythm of the song
of you. It’s how to get back to the
centre of things. The centre of
yourself. When the world wants
to take you in every other
direction. It was the irst thing
you learned to do. The most
essential and simple thing you
do. To be aware of breath is to
remember you are alive.
GENTLY DOES IT
Don’t grab life by
the throat. As the writer
Ray Bradbury said: “Life
should be touched,
not strangled“.
46 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
SIMPLIFY THINGS
Declutter your mind. Panic is
the product of overload. In an
overloaded world, we need to
have a ilter. We need to simplify
things. We need to disconnect
sometimes. We need to stop
staring at our phones. To have
moments of not thinking about
work. A kind of mental feng shui.
FIND ACCEPTANCE
Accept feelings. And
accept that they are
just that: feelings.
deined by frequent panic attacks and
the continuous hellish fear of the next
invite the panic – as a test, to see how
SOOTHING SOUNDS
Listen to calm noise; things
that aren’t as stimulating
as music. Think waves,
your own breath, a breeze
through the leaves,
the purr of a cat, and
best of all: rain.
MAKE PANIC YOUR PAL
If you feel panic rising, the instinctive
reaction is to panic some more; to
panic about the panic. The trick is to
try to feel panic without panicking
about it. This is nearly – but not quite
– impossible. My panic disorder was
one. By the time I’d had hundreds of
panic attacks, I began to tell myself
I wanted them. I didn’t, obviously.
But I used to work hard at trying to
I could cope. The more I invited it,
the less it wanted to stay around.
MOVE IT
Stretch and exercise.
Panic is physical as well
as mental. For me,
running and yoga
help more than
anything else.
Take your favourite magazine with you wherever
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SEATED ACUPRESSURE MASSAGE
A SHORT BUT INVIGORATING TREATMENT THAT CAN HELP TO TACKLE
GENERAL ACHES AND PAINS THROUGH RESTORING THE BALANCE OF QI
cupressure, which is the basis
of a seated acupressure massage,
can be traced back thousands
of years to the ancient practices of
traditional Chinese medicine (TCM).
Often referred to as ‘acupuncture
without the needles’, acupressure is
based on the principle that vital energy
(qi) runs throughout the body, along
channels called meridians. According
to TCM, if the low of qi gets disrupted
or blocked, this can cause disease
within the mind, body and spirit, with
the health of all three considered to be
intrinsically linked. Acupressure aims
to restore the balance of qi, with the
therapist applying pressure to speciic
‘acupoints’ along the meridians, using
their ingers, thumbs, elbows and other
parts of their hands and arms.
The development of seated acupressure
or ‘on-site’ massage is largely credited to
American therapist, David Palmer. He
created a tailor-made routine in the early
1980s when treating employees working
in Silicon Valley, the technology hub
of the United States. Realising its full
potential in the corporate world, he went
on to design a portable ergonomic chair
to enhance the treatment and ensure his
clients were as comfortable as possible.
“Today, people from all walks of life
can enjoy a seated acupressure massage,”
explains Mary Dalgleish, Vice President
of the Federation of Holistic Therapists,
and a practitioner of seated acupressure
massage. “It involves the therapist using
a variety of techniques, such as pressing,
rubbing, stretching, kneading, squeezing
and rotations. Usually the whole body
will be treated, from head to foot, but
HAVE YOU TRIED
Words: Karen Young
more attention is usually paid to the
neck, shoulders, back and arms, as these
are areas where most of us store a lot of
muscular tension.”
“One of the really nice features of
this treatment is its portability,” Mary
continues. “Seated acupressure is still
very popular in the workplace, and
because it doesn’t involve removing
clothing or applying any massage oils
or creams, it’s now enjoyed in a wide
range of other locations as well – from
airport lounges and conference centres
to local fairs and events.”
Sessions last from 10 to 30 minutes
and cost between £10 to £60, depending
on the length of treatment, location and
therapist. Many clients ind the treatment
invigorating and uplifting, but do bear
in mind that it may not be suitable for
everyone, such as those who have
experienced a recent neck injury
or similar trauma.
The Federation of Holistic Therapists
(www.fht.org.uk) is the UK and Ireland’s
leading professional association for
complementary, holistic beauty and
sports therapists.
MASSAGE
Five beneits of seated
acupressure massage
Lower back pain is a common
and often painful complaint.
Guidelines produced by the
National Institute for Health and
Care Excellence (NICE) recommend
massage, alongside exercise,
as a way of managing this.
BEFORE YOU GO
For those Seated acupressure
who sit in the massage should be
same position for used alongside standard
medical care and not as
prolonged periods,
an alternative. Always
seated acupressure
consult your GP or other
massage can help to health professional
relieve muscular aches for medical attention
and improve posture. and advice.
If you happen to have
sensitive skin, this type
of massage could be ideal for you
as it doesn’t involve applying
any oils or products.
Tension-type headaches can
strike when muscles in the neck
and scalp become tense or contract.
Seated acupressure targets and helps
to relax muscles in these areas.
Time poor? This type of massage
takes as little as 10 minutes,
so you can enjoy an effective,
stress-busting treatment without
having to keep an eye on the clock.
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 49
 wellbeing

Feel supported as you enjoy the

Photography www.unnata.com

>AJAPOKBEJRANOEKJO=J@J@
JAS=JCHAOBKNUKQNLKOAO
EJ=J=ANE=HUKC=D=IIK?G

Moving from mat to mid-air can give you
a fresh perspective, says Alice Whitehead
hen former aerobics instructor Sam Dignan
damaged her back eight years ago, she had to learn
to walk again. It was yoga that brought her back
from the brink. But rather than roll out her yoga mat and
work from the loor up in traditional asanas, Sam used the
support of a trapeze to move in and out of poses, bringing
a weightlessness to her life that she’d craved for years.
“After my operation, I was just in so much pain, and
the doctors said I would be paralysed in 12 months if
I didn’t change my lifestyle,” recalls Sam, 51. “Being able
to do something physical again was a magical feeling.
I couldn’t believe how much my body loved to be upside
down!” Sam now runs Gravity Yoga in Northamptonshire
(www.gravityyoga.co.uk), passing on her high-lying skills
in a regular trapeze class. “It has changed my life,” she says.
Sam isn’t alone. Across the globe, aerial yoga – a loating
form of Hatha yoga – is taking of (quite literally) in studios,
gyms and dance halls, with a rising number of participants
tapping into the highs of mid-air asana and the freedom
and fun that is rarely found in other itness classes.
The idea of reversing blood low in the body to beneit
health is nothing new – inversions in yoga are centuries
old. Early practice of ‘elevation’ in yoga is thought to have
been started by B.K.S Iyengar, the founder of Iyengar yoga,
in the early 20th century. He incorporated blocks, straps,
chairs and rudimentary slings using ‘silks’ – long lengths
of stretchy tissus or fabric, used by circus performers – to
allow students to get better alignment and inversions.
AERIAL YOGA
It is only in the last decade that specialist equipment, such
as slings, swings and hammocks, has become more widely
available, to facilitate such movement in classes. In aerial
yoga, these low-hanging hammocks are suspended from
the ceiling and support the body weight, allowing people
to deeply but gently stretch and decompress the spine. The
hammock height can be altered to give a diferent feel to the
class: mid-waist tends to be more energetic, while just above
the loor is more restorative.
At New York’s Unnata Aerial Yoga (www.unnata.com), the
hammocks are used in harmony with more traditional, static
yoga poses, in a more yin style, to achieve proper posture
through relaxation rather than efort. “I wanted to create
a method that worked for the average person, not just for
athletes,” says Unnata founder Michelle Dortignac. “I don’t
think of yoga and aerial yoga as being diferent from each
other – we integrate loor and air and reap the beneits of
both. The sensation of hanging gives lightness to the heart
somehow. It brings me joy.”
By contrast, Sam’s trapeze yoga is a more dynamic,
yang-style interpretation, with one foot in circus skills and
acrobatics and the other in yoga. This style of aerial yoga
uses a hammock along with handles and footholds to get
a better grip. And, as I discovered when I joined Sam’s
class, you also need a lot of upper body and core strength.
“It reaches parts other yoga classes and poses will not!”
Sam exclaims as we lip over into a Flying Spider, with our
torso and legs horizontal to the ground.
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 51
wellbeing

She’s not wrong. A 60-minute class saw us
low from one inverted pose to the next – the
‘Banana Man’, the ‘Flying Double Diamond’,
even press-ups – giving us not so much a yoga
class as a HIIT workout for the whole body.
That said, like a traditional yoga class, aerial
yoga is still very much about breath and focus,
and can be very relaxing. The exhilarating
feeling of blood low to my head kept thoughts
at bay, and not since I was a child have I been
allowed to ‘play’ in this way. Our inal blissful
posture, the Cocoon, where we wrapped our
prostrate bodies in the hammock and let
gravity do the rest, felt deeply meditative.
“Hanging upside down – what’s not to like?”
choreographer Christopher Harrison – that
draws on dance, pilates and calisthenics.
“I sufer from excessive joint mobility and
it’s been great for me to have the support of
the hammock during training,” she says.
“I also love the fact that it’s playful and fun,
and is an inclusive activity,” she adds.
Samantha’s student Andrew Gregory agrees,
having recently had his leg amputated after
many years of pain following a motorcycle
accident. “The support of the hammock has
allowed me to be able to take part in something
alongside everyone else,” he says. “The challenge
for me was working around my disability, but
everything can be modiied to make it easier or

Photography www.londondanceacademy.co.uk
affirmed a fellow classmate Sarah Higgins, 47, harder, so I never get bored. My level of itness
when we were inally upright again. Sarah, and strength has increased massively, but it’s
who’s been coming to Sam’s class for four also helped manage my long-term depression.”
months, says she fell in love with it from her Sam Dignan feels the same. “Although I do
irst session. “I’m an accountant and my job is still feel ‘broken’ after my operation, I’m able
very sedentary, so this is a fantastic chance to to do something wonderful with my life,” she
do something diferent,” says Sarah. “I like that tells me. “In my teens, I was a dancer, and for
it doesn’t involve running or jumping, like a eight years I wasn’t able to dance. Now, I can
conventional gym class does. It stretches every dance in the air.”
part of the body, but you also get up a sweat.
It’s a great next step from a traditional yoga
class and a chance to push your practice –
I always leave feeling energised.”
While aerial yoga isn’t for everyone (it
is not recommended if you are pregnant
or breastfeeding, have glaucoma, high or
low blood pressure, or a heart condition),
anecdotally at least, it appears to provide a
multitude of beneits. Evidence suggests that
regular practice can help with cardiovascular
conditioning; help to align the vertebrae;
increase body awareness (or ‘kinesthetic
awareness’); improve self esteem; refresh the
lymphatic, digestive and circulatory systems;
and boost our ‘happy hormones’ serotonin
and oxytocin. It’s also particularly good
for those with back or joint problems, for
whom conventional exercise is too painful or
Photography Alice Whitehead

problematic. At the London Dance Academy

(www.londondanceacademy.co.uk), aerial
yoga and pilates instructor Samantha Turner
teaches AntiGravity Yoga – an aerial workout
invented by former gymnast and Broadway
Photography www.unnata.com

52 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 AERIAL YOGA

Hang out
FLY THROUGH YOUR NEXT
YOGA SESSION AT YOUR LOCAL
AERIAL YOGA STUDIO

GRAVITY YOGA UK
www.gravityyoga.co.uk
Northamptonshire Trapeze Yoga
classes led by Sam Dignan.

LONDON DANCE ACADEMY

www.londondanceacademy.co.uk
A range of classes for all abilities,
including an AntiGravity Suspension
Photography Esther Segarra Fitness class based on cardiovascular
body conditioning.

AERIAL YOGA EDINBURGH

www.aerialyogaedinburgh.co.uk
Classes for beginners, improvers and
a restorative option for relaxation.

COCOON YOGA
www.cocoonyoga.co.uk
Carlisle-based classes with a comforting
and restorative pregnancy aerial practice.

VIRGIN ACTIVE
www.virginactive.co.uk
Regular weekly AntiGravity Yoga
classes held in gyms across the UK.

UNNATA AERIAL YOGA

Photography Sam Dignan

www.unnata.com
Visit these New York classes to explore,
reine and advance your yoga practice
from a different perspective.

Clockwise from top right: a dynamic posture at London

SKY-LAB
Dance Academy’s AntiGravity Yoga studio; aerial yoga has
www.sky-lab.com
been life-changing for teacher Sam Dignan; relaxing in
Experience everything aerial itness
Cocoon pose at the end of class at Unnata in New York;
has to offer with sessions for strength,
Alice Whitehead channels her inner hero in the Superman
relaxation and everything inbetween
pose; hammocks have helped yoga student Andrew Gregory to
in this Sydney studio.
develop his practice despite losing part of his leg.

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 53
 listicle
{lis-tik-ul}
noun
Great stuf presented
wholly or partly in
the form of a list.

SOULFUL WOMEN COMMITTED TO SHARING

THEIR PRACTICE WITH THE WORLD
Words: Lisa Kjellsson (@thelkedit)

ESTHER EKHART
2 Esther’s mindful approach to yoga is inluenced
by her dedicated personal meditation practice and her
background as a therapist. The emphasis in her teaching
is very much on slowing down and being present in
the moment. Esther hosts workshops, teacher training
and retreats internationally – the latest one was held
in Australia – and ofers online classes for her global
following online (www.ekhartyoga.com). There’s a class
for everyone, from stronger styles such as hatha and
vinyasa low to slower practices like yin and yoga nidra.
@estherekhart.yoga
Photography: Harold Pereira

54 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM

Photography: JQ Williams
JULIA BERKELEY
Multi-talented Julia, who resides in Ojai, the
Californian mind-body-soul mecca, weaves together asana
(poses), pranayama (breathing), mudra (gestures), music
and meditation to inspire joy, presence and relaxation both
on and of the mat. Her teaching is infused with a soothing
and uplifting dose of spirituality, and her passion for yogic
chanting recently led her to record her irst EP, Embody
Love, available on iTunes and other digital music platforms.
@juliaberkeley
Photography: Kerri Verna
KERRI VERNA
If anyone’s going to help you nail a handstand
virtually it’s Kerri, aka Beach Yoga Girl, but her message is
to pay attention to what your body and soul most need
rather than pursuing the perfect pose for social media. This
philosophy, and her honesty about her life and struggles
– she writes candidly about co-dependency and living with
chronic pain – has earned the West Palm Beach-based yogi
a loyal Instagram following of 1 million.
@beachyogagirl
LISTICLE
Photography: Radesh Photography
DEEPIKA MEHTA
A near-fatal rock climbing accident 20 years ago
became the catalyst for Mumbai-based Deepika’s yoga
journey. Her doctors said she would never walk again
but she sought strength in her culture’s ancient healing
practices, and ashtanga, meditation and pranayama gave
her a new lease of life. Having devoted herself to sharing
its virtues, she has since taught all over the world and
frequently shares her teachings on TV.
@deepikamehtayoga
Photography Michael Worthington
FAITH HUNTER
Faith began practicing yoga in the 1990s as a
way of coping with the loss of her brother and found it
transformational. Now a sought-after yoga and meditation
teacher, as well as a wellness philanthropist, she is based
in Washington DC. Faith tours internationally, sharing her
practice which is inluenced by both kundalini and vinyasa
and includes breath, movement, music and stillness, aiming
to inspire others to live an epic life.
@spirituallyfly
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 55
wellbeing

WE OFTEN SEE FEELING ANXIOUS AS A NEGATIVE TRAIT, BUT

IT’S ACTUALLY TRYING TO TELL US SOMETHING IMPORTANT.
WE NEED TO ACCEPT AND BEFRIEND IT, SAYS NATALIE LUE

hen a client of mine, Amanda*, got in touch with
me, she’d been experiencing anxiety in her year-
long relationship pretty much since it began. At irst,
she put it down to new relationship jitters and not being used
to dating such a nice guy. After a while, she blamed it on her
‘baggage’; intolerance and being ‘too sensitive’. But, as is the
way when we dismiss our feelings, the anxiety kept niggling
and building. Next thing, it was keeping her awake at night.
Whether we realise it or not, many of us feel anxiety every
day and in many diferent contexts. But in order to react to it
correctly, we need to know whether the anxiety is due to past
issues, our insecurities, or our intuition trying to alert us to
something. It’s one of life’s ongoing challenges, and Amanda
did what we often do in these situations: she rationalised her
anxiety so much that she missed the wood for the trees.
We tend to see anxiety as a negative trait, believing that
the fact we’re anxious makes us
wrong or our thinking faulty.
But what we should be doing is “We have to
acknowledging that our body is
trying to communicate something. take care of
It’s letting us know that we need to
be careful, based on past pain, fear
and guilt – or that we don’t have
ourselves, so that
faith in ourselves. Or both.
The reason Amanda was anxious
anxiety can do
for the entire relationship is that
she told herself that she shouldn’t
a better job of
feel anxious; that her partner was
‘nice’, educated and fun and that,
alerting us”
relative to past relationships, this
one was ‘better’. She talked herself out of her feelings because
the relationship looked good on paper. It was as if there had
to be something drastic to pin her feelings on for them to be
justiied. In the absence of that, she overlooked the obvious:
her anxiety was communicating that she was in the wrong
relationship. Her emotional state was the evidence she needed
to take action. She didn’t understand it, but her body did.
Anxiety wants our reassurance, and where needed, our
action. This means that we’ve either got to do something that
demonstrates to it that we are OK, or we’ve got to remedy the
situation. We also have to take care of ourselves, so that anxiety
can do a better job of alerting us.
What often happens instead is that we freeze. Analysis
paralysis sets in. We want to think everything out to the nth
degree because we’re afraid of getting things wrong. It creates a
NATALIE LUE has been writing her blog www.baggagereclaim.com for 12 years
and is the author of five books aimed at helping people-pleasers and overachievers to
break unhealthy relationship patterns and harmful habits. Follow her on Insta @natlue
RELATIONSHIPS
Catch 22 situation: we struggle to listen to and trust ourselves,
but also don’t feel entirely safe in trusting the other party.
One of the handiest things I’ve learned through listening to
myself and teaching others to do the same, is that intuition is
only concerned with what is. Unlike ego, fear and criticism, it’s
not trying to prepare you for what will happen in 2099, nor
is it concerned with the past or power trips like winning and
being right. Intuition is about now.
When we fail to listen to our intuition, or to act in a particular
area, anxiety is the body’s way of telling us. The best thing
that anxiety ever did for me came in the form of a panic attack.
As horrendous as it was, it forced me to acknowledge the
accumulation of missed messages from my intuition. It was
a massive wake-up call, and inally got me to take action.
Throughout our lives we’ll experience getting what we want
(or what others want for us) and having to act on the realisation
that it’s not right for us. This is why I hear
from so many people who inally land the
‘perfect job’ or achieve what they thought
was their dream, only to be besieged by
unexpected emotions that convey that this
isn’t the path for them. They feel like they
should be happy, that they should be able
to make it work.
That’s not to say we should always take
anxiety purely at face value, but we do need
to see it as an ally doing its best to alert us
to something about an aspect of our life.
Hating ourselves for experiencing anxiety
will only tighten its grip, not least because
we will respond in less-than-supportive
ways. By irst accepting that this is how we feel, we have an
opportunity to assess why. We can address underlying causes
so we can talk and act ourselves out of the wave of emotions,
or come to understand the current nature of our life. It might
require us to get uncomfortable, to make changes that ly in the
face of the ‘shoulds’, but inner peace is on the other side.
Our intuition won’t always tell us what we want to hear, but
it always has our back. When we cultivate a more mindful
relationship with it, we gather the intelligence we need to
understand our emotions. By basing ourselves in the present,
we can acknowledge insecurities and past experiences – and
respond in the now. The more we do this, the less we will be
held hostage by it or be confused by its presence. We’re never
going to be best friends with anxiety, but we can treat it as
a friendly nudge to take care of us.
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 57
G E T T H E L AT E S T I S S U E !

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 RELATIONSHIPS

Our bond with our partners

should provide support, enrichment
and love – but this isn’t always the case

Words: Karen Edwards / Illustration: Geraldine Sy

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 59
wellbeing

e book in check-ups to make sure
our bodies are functioning well,
we exercise to keep our physical
stamina at its peak and we have appraisals
to ensure our work is up to scratch. So why,
when relationships are perhaps the biggest
connections we can make in life, don’t we
consider a relationship health-check?
The fact is, relationships can be complicated,
and facing up to potential problems can be
daunting. But being willing to ask yourself
tough questions doesn’t mean that you are
pre-empting a failure. Instead, see it as an
honest way to be sure that you aren’t going to
end up in a painful situation further down the
line. After all, if you are hoping to spend the
rest of your life with someone, surely it’s best
to know that they are right for you?
The most important thing when considering
the healthiness of a relationship is both your
and your partner’s everyday wellbeing. And
if something doesn’t feel right for either of
you, it’s essential to determine what that is as
early as possible. “At times like this, it is also
worth asking why things might not be right,”
says relationship coach Wendy Capewell. She
says that genuinely feeling comfortable with
your partner is key in a healthy relationship,
rather than convincing yourself that you are
comfortable because the relationship sounds
good on paper. “We can’t always share the
same interests as our partners, and these
often change with time anyway. Building a
relationship on shared beliefs and values is
better, and creates a more permanent bond,”
she explains.
Another important factor when addressing
your relationship health is understanding
that a partner should be an addition to your
life, rather than that one thing you need to be
happy. “We should have our own goals, dreams
and aspirations and be able to pursue those
within a relationship,” says Wendy. “Each
person should be able to cheer the other on,
acting supportively and being there if things
don’t work out as planned,” she adds. Realising
this will mean that you won’t pile all of your
expectations unfairly onto a partner, which can
lead to unhealthy behaviours developing.
Unfortunately, despite our best hopes and
eforts, there are times when this does happen.
Dependence, a need for control and other
negative behaviours can all grow within a
relationship, especially when situations beyond
our control are happening in other aspects of
our lives, or when we’ve had bad experiences

WENDY CAPEWELL
Wendy is a trained counsellor and
relationship coach. She was inspired
by her own experiences to help others.
www.yourrelationshipspecialist.co.uk

60 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM

in the past. “There are some obvious and some
subtle signs to look out for. These are often
dismissed as ‘just a phase’, but they are very real,”
says Wendy. “For instance, if you ind yourself
unable to share feelings, if you are always arguing
over the same issues or feel constantly put down
by a partner. If you stop being intimate with each
other – and I don’t mean just when it comes to sex
– but kissing and cuddling too, and talking about
your innermost dreams and concerns. These can
all be warning signs that something isn’t right.”
But how easy is it to prevent a relationship
getting to this stage? “[Unhealthy traits] come
down to either how you see yourself in the
relationship or how one or both parties behave.
It might even be a mix of the two,” says Natalie
Lue, relationship expert and In The Moment’s
relationship columnist. “If one or both of you
have resorted to behaving in ways that aren’t
conducive to growing the relationship, an open
and honest conversation is worth having,” she
recommends. “It may lead to self-relection and
growth for both parties, or it may prove to be the
wake-up call that the relationship isn’t right.”
This prospect might sound daunting, but if
these unhealthy behaviours are not recognised
or addressed they can become toxic over
time, turning into emotional abuse, or worse.
Unfortunately, the signs of this are more easy
to notice, but even harder to resolve. The tactic
of ‘gaslighting’ in order to gain more power
– where the victim is made to question their
reality – is recognised as a major part of a coercive
relationship. As a result, the recipient of such
behaviour may feel worn down, or as though they
are imagining situations or ‘going mad’. Other
common signs of a coercive partner include a
RELATIONSHIPS
lack of compassion for others, and a gradual
encouragement of isolation from family or
friends – perhaps by expressing jealousy when
you spend time with other people. Making
decisions without consultation is another
way to undermine a person’s worth, while
also making underhand comments that seem
like a harmless joke. Encouraging inancial
dependence can also be included, as it could
leave the dependent person unable to exercise
control over their life if they have to run all
spending past their partner. A more deliberate
action; ‘stonewalling’ is an anxiety-inducing
method of ignoring someone, often involving
the partner in question disappearing for a few
days out of the blue, with little explanation.
“[This behaviour] can be very subtle and
insidious, to the point where the person on
the receiving end doesn’t notice it happening
at irst,” explains Wendy. “There are often
lies involved, and there are times when [the
coercive partner] is loving and even apologetic,
leading to even more self-doubt.”
In 2015, the government introduced a new
law making it illegal to exercise coercive control
over a partner. The move was a nod to anyone
sufering from emotional abuse, acknowledging
that their situation was recognised as seriously
as those experiencing physical violence. The
difficulty is, when the situation has reached this
level this is usually the point that it is hardest
to ind the strength to leave the relationship,
particularly if that person has been made to
feel inferior through put-downs or a constant
stream of criticism.
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 61
 wellbeing
With this in mind, it is important to ask
yourself those hard questions about your
relationship as soon as any uneasy feelings
arise. Don’t underestimate the necessity in
following up on those signs, and don’t be afraid
to walk away if you know the answers aren’t
positive – the long-term alternative could be
much worse. “It can be extremely hard to take
those irst steps towards leaving, for many
reasons,” says Wendy. “You believe that they
love you deep down, or you’re fearful of what
they will do if you try to leave. Perhaps you are
also scared that you won’t ind anyone else.”
In these instances, it’s helpful to remind
yourself of the relationship qualities you desire
and know to be important, as well as your
deep-rooted values. Is it possible to achieve
this with someone who has such tendencies?
If the answer is ‘no’, then it might be time to
walk away. Remember that, with 7.6 billion
people in the world, you have a good chance
of meeting someone else when the time is
right – someone who you can share those core
values with, creating a strong, supportive and
ultimately happy relationship.
PHONE A FRIEND
If you feel that you
might need support
with any of the issues
mentioned in this feature,
you can ring the National
Domestic Abuse helpline
on 0808 2000 247, or
email helpline@
womensaid.org
62 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
Rosie’s story*
“By the time my two-and-a-half year relationship
with Karl* came to an end, I was a wreck.
I couldn’t help but replay the arguments we
had and the names he called me. “Pathetic”,
“mad”, “crazy b****”, “psycho’”. He had said
them with such conviction that I had wondered
if maybe I had actually turned into this horrible
person he described.
Things weren’t always like this. When we irst
met, Karl was a diferent person. On nights out,
he would grab my hand and pull me of into a
quiet corner to tell me he loved me. We pulled
sickies and lay in bed all day. I fell madly in love
– and for a short while, I felt very loved back.
We had been together for six months and
were planning our irst holiday when I irst felt
that something wasn’t right. “I don’t love you,
maybe you shouldn’t come on this trip,” read
a text message I received at work. I tried to
phone him, but the calls rang out. Two days of
complete silence followed, while I questioned
what I could have done wrong. Then, he
phoned me. “I’m sorry, baby. I don’t know
why I said that. I love you, let’s go to Thailand
together!” I can’t tell you why I didn’t walk
away then. I should have listened to my gut.
Instead, I put it down to being a blip and told
myself it would be a one-of. It wasn’t.
That feeling of unease became my life for the
next two years. I went from seeing my friends
several times a week to barely seeing them in
months because he felt he didn’t connect with
them. It was easier to pass on a night out than
create that feeling of tension. Our evenings out
became a nightmare of either watching him lirt
with the bar staf or being completely ignored.
When I confronted him, I was “paranoid”
and “psycho”. I waited outside countless
restaurants, bars and train stations at agreed
meeting times, only for him never to show up.
My conidence was slowly chipped away; I felt
every bit the “pathetic” woman he painted me
out to be. Deep down, I knew that this wasn’t

me, but I just couldn’t ind the voice to express it.
My entire body ached constantly. I would look at
my drawn face and sunken eyes in the mirror and
wonder how I had gotten there.
Finally, after a night out for my 23rd birthday
where he told me my friends were ashamed to
be around me, I logged onto a women’s forum.
Under the heading, ‘Am I going mad?’, I listed
some of the things that had happened. The
answers came looding in: “You’re not mad, this
is emotional abuse, please leave him before it goes
too far.” Now, I had to ind the strength to escape.
But before I could, Karl broke up with me – he
had met someone else. My body just shut down
and at times I struggled to leave the house. Then,
my friend Tom* told me he was moving abroad
and I knew immediately what I needed to do.
I bought a one-way ticket to go with him. Eleven
months later, having travelled through Asia and
had enough time and space to heal, I came home.
Karl tried to destroy me, but by doing this he
helped me to build a new ‘me’. One that was
brave enough to do anything by myself.”
*Names have been changed.
NATALIE LUE
Natalie is a relationship expert who
specialises in helping people deal with
emotional baggage and toxic situations.
www.baggagereclaim.co.uk
RELATIONSHIPS
Natalie’s advice
“Unhealthy relationships are corrosive to
your sense of self, afecting your emotional,
mental, physical and spiritual wellbeing,” says
Natalie. “They also gradually permeate every
area of your life, often impacting on your other
relationships and leading to isolation. Pain is
not conducive to love.
“Claims of change are extremely common in
unhealthy relationships and it’s not unusual
for these to be accompanied by what appear to
be uncharacteristic displays of emotion. This
leads to you feeling guilty and being charmed
into giving them another chance. Talking about
change isn’t enough – they would need to be
seeing a professional and addressing their
behaviour for it to happen.
“I recommend a Get Out Plan, because it
stops you from making a sudden decision that
you backtrack on, whether it’s due to self-
doubt or being charmed out of it. Give yourself
a deadline of, for example, three months. Use
the time to slowly step back, but to also take the
blinkers of. Stick to the date. If the relationship
is abusive, the time can be used to quietly seek
professional advice and support.”
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 63
3-7 October 2019

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 wellbeing

DEAR AUNT JOSEPHINE

rnegie
& author, Josephine Ca
Journalist, life coac h g bu t is WHETHER A SOCIABLE GROUP OR A GREAT BESTIE, WE ALL
listic counsellin
holds a certific ate in ho vic e.
out good ad
best know n for giving THRIVE THROUGH OUR FRIENDSHIPS. BUT WHEN SOCIALISING
BECOMES SOMETHING WE DREAD, IS IT TIME TO MOVE ON?

“Dear Aunt Josephine, I moved to a new city
a few years ago and quickly met a new crowd of
people. My new circle is very sociable, which
was great at the start, but it has started to feel
exhausting keeping up with them. I’m actually quite an
introvert and I prefer meeting up one-on-one, or with
small groups of people. I’ve also put on some weight
recently and I feel really self-conscious meeting up with
my friends, because I know they’re all quite glamorous and
they can be quite judgemental about people’s appearances.
Everything seems to involve drinking as well and I don’t
want my entire social life to be based around alcohol.
I don’t want to risk losing my friends because they are
fun, but I’m starting to dread meeting up
with them. One of them made a pointed
comment the other day about how I “GENUINE
always make excuses. What’s the answer?” ARE ONES YOU
Self-Conscious and Stressed, Bournemouth
CAN TRULY BE
YOURSELF WITH”
“Dear Self-Conscious and
Stressed, I think we can be a bit
like magpies when it comes to making new friends:
we gravitate towards the shiny, glittery people because they
seem like the most fun. It sounds like you hit the ground
running when you moved and threw yourself into a new
social scene, for which I applaud you. The downside is
that now the dust (or glitter) has settled, it sounds like
you’ve found yourself in a friendship group that isn’t
really for you.
Alcohol is a tricky one. In British or Western culture
especially, it’s often the glue of our social lives. While
there is no doubting the enjoyment factor of meeting up
for drinks, or bonding with people over a glass of wine (or
four), it can mean that a lot of our socialising can actually
be quite supericial – and exhausting, as you mention,
particularly if all you want to do is hang out with a friend
and have some downtime.
So, how can you ind friendships that suit you? You’ve
been there long enough now to establish your own base –
what other avenues or interests can you explore to ind
like-minded people? Lots of leisure activities involve
keeping it, so they’re a really great way to feel healthier
and meet kindred spirits.
It’s also worth bearing in mind that some people probably
drink because they sufer from social anxiety. Rather than
seeing all your friends as massively extroverted, can you
identify any fellow introverts? If so, you could contact them
and suggest new things like meeting up for a walk, or going
for cofee rather than a drink. You don’t
have to form a splinter group or drop
FRIENDS them completely, but have a proactive
look at things to make them work for you.
Taking alcohol out of the equation is also
a brutal but brilliant way to ind out if you
actually have anything in common with
people! If you have nothing to talk about
without the wine, maybe you’re just not
right for each other.
One thing I will say, is that the sign of a real, genuine
friend is someone you can truly be yourself with, through
both good times and bad. Real friends don’t judge or
criticise you for who you are, or what you look like. They
have your best interests at heart. They ask what’s going on
with you, rather than sniping at you. It doesn’t matter how
glamorous someone looks if they act in a toxic manner
(which, coincidentally, is also a sure-ire sign of an unhappy
person). You need a social life that nurtures and enriches
you. If some people fall by the wayside, so be it. It will
only open up the space for new, better friends to come in.
Ultimately, spending time with real friends should leave
you feeling better about yourself, not worse.

Ask Aunt Josephine a question by emailing her at hello@aunt josephine.co.uk.

Unfortunately, Aunt Josephine can’t enter into personal correspondence.

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 65
 ADVERTI SEMEN T

SEASONS MAY
CHANGE
...but a beautiful shepherd hut can be enjoyed all year
round, whether through socialising in the warmer
months or creating a cosy spot to escape the cold

Finding joy in every season is
easy with a shepherd hut. Invite
family and friends over for a
barbecue and you could use the
space to prep the food, set up a
drinks station or even find some
respite from the sun. Alternatively,
you can deck it out with woolly
blankets, light some candles and
get comfy when the cold rolls in.
They’re also great as mindfulness
retreats, offering a spot where
you can meditate, connect with
nature or simply sit back and relax
– whatever the weather.
Blackdown Shepherd Huts has
truly mastered the art of crafting
these beautiful structures. The
family-run company is based
in Somerset, and its gorgeous
creations are inspired by the
traditional shepherd hut – a mobile
structure designed to follow the
flock. Though Blackdown’s huts
retain much of their original rustic
charm, they have been updated to
fit modern lifestyles with plenty of
luxurious touches.
The huts are completely bespoke,
meaning you can put your personal
stamp on every step of the build,
whether it’s the layout of the
interior, the materials you prefer or
the colours that work best for you.
There are plenty of blueprints to
choose from, so you can make sure
your hut fits the purpose – and
space – you have in mind.
The Turnkey Hut, for example, is
ideal for socialising as it features a
hand-made oak worktop, a Neff hob
and an integral fridge. The Retreat,
on the other hand, offers a snug
space where you can unwind after
a long day at work or an invigorating
walk in the woods. Go all out
with the Brace Hut, a spacious
retreat kitted out with a copper
William Holland roll-top bath and a
stargazing roof above the bed.
If you love DIY or are feeling
adventurous, you can build your
own hut. Blackdown provides the
materials and instructions needed
to craft a beautiful hut, all you have
to do is embrace the DIY spirit –
and invest in a decent toolbox!

Discover more about Blackdown Shepherd Huts at

blackdownshepherdhuts.co.uk
 MAGAZINE

Photography Peppermint Wellness

DISCOVER SMART SNACK SWAPS TO HELP YOU FEEL

CALMER AND MORE CREATIVE. TAKE THE PRESSURE OFF
AS YOU EASE INTO THE NEW SEASON AND UPGRADE
YOUR SHOPPER WITH STYLISH ECO-FRIENDLY BAGS.
 living

SNACK ATTACK
We know that eating
lunch al desko isn't
good for us, but that
goes for snacking as well.
Move to another room
or the kitchen to avoid
mindless munching in
front of your screen.

68 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM

Simple swaps and energy-sustaining snacks can help us to sail
through our working day, says health coach Suzy Glaskie
e’ve all been there – the 3pm slump
hits and before you know it, you’re
mindlessly munching on a treat from
the office biscuit stash. But being back at our
desks after the summer break presents us with
a golden opportunity: rather than sliding back
into unhelpful habits, we can eat smarter at
work for better focus, drive and concentration.
Switching to healthy, energy-sustaining snacks
can help you to cruise through the day –
something I’d never actually experienced until
I retrained as a health coach.
Before that, the 22 years I spent in PR were
a rollercoaster… though not in the sense you’d
imagine. Yes, there were the inevitable highs,
lows and a fair few tears that came with the
nature of the job. But I was also strapped into a
rollercoaster of my own making – and the irony
was, I never even knew I was on it.
Although I was a cast-iron grafter, the truth
I have to acknowledge now is that I limped
through my career. Why? Because I hadn’t
the slightest notion of how to fuel myself. All
the qualiications and kick-ass trouser suits
in the world count for nought if your brain
isn’t functioning properly. And mine was most
certainly not operating at its optimum level for
a good portion of the day – every single day.
My typical food day would go something
like this. I’d have toast or cereal for breakfast,
then feel absolutely starving by 9:30am, when
I’d embark on the irst of several rounds of
crumpets or malt bread. Lunch would be at
12.30pm (soup and a baguette), after which I’d
feel OK for a while – until 3pm, when someone
SMART SNACKING
would generally do a run to the newsagents
and I’d enjoy a mid-afternoon chocolate ix.
You get the picture.
What I woefully misunderstood for all those
years was that I was subjecting my body to
a vertiginous ride that saw my blood sugar
soaring and then rapidly plummeting, leaving
me ravenous for my next carb ix. I had no idea
that the toast I was woling down was rapidly
being converted by my body into sugar – giving
me the same hike and crash as a chocolate
bar. I didn’t realise that the careless mistakes
I was making at work were actually strongly
connected to what I was eating. Every time
I experienced a blood sugar crash, I’d switch
from a competent PR executive to a shaky,
cranky, green-faced, distracted liability.
So, what was going on with me – and with
most other people eating in a similar fashion at
work? When our blood sugar level crashes, our
pre-frontal cortex (the executive bit of our brain
responsible for making wise decisions) can’t
work properly. It’s no wonder, then, that so
many of us are hit with brain freeze. Coupled
with the drop in cognitive function, our mood
is strongly afected too. So, instead of feeling
emotionally resilient and speaking calmly and
constructively to our colleagues and clients, we
explode and bark things we later regret.
The good news, though, is that this is easily
and quickly remedied once we make some
small changes to our diet. The irst thing to
remember is that we need protein with each
meal. Perhaps one reason for office snacking
reaching such epic proportions is that we are
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 69
 living

simply not eating well. So many of us eschew

breakfast, launching ourselves into work until
we hit a wall and run for the irst quick-ix
Brain-boosting
we can ind – and we don’t generally have to
look very far for it. The smarter strategy is to
cacao balls
insulate ourselves against cravings by fuelling TRY THESE GUILT-FREE TREATS FOR BETWEEN-MEAL
up properly with nutrient-packed meals.
My carb explosion breakfast of toast or SLUMPS WHEN YOU NEED A QUICK PICK-ME-UP
cereal was setting me up for an entire day of
crashes and cravings. Once I switched to eggs METHOD
for breakfast, my whole day was transformed. Put all the ingredients in a high-powered food processor
Because the protein and good fats in these and blitz until well-combined.
nutritious powerhouses stabilised my blood
sugar, I was able to concentrate for the whole Tip the mixture onto a clean surface, take small amounts of
morning – for the irst time in my life. it and roll into balls. If any nuts or seeds have fallen out of
Good fats keep us feeling full and they the mix, just reincorporate them.
also cut cravings – two very good reasons
to give those sugar-illed low-fat yoghurts a Place the cacao balls in the fridge to chill for a few hours before
miss and opt for nuts and seeds to keep you eating. They will keep for up to two weeks in the fridge.
feeling satisied instead. These
are incredibly nutrient-rich
HEART HELP foods that will feed your
As well as giving brain (and skin), as well as Ingredients
you an energy boost, protecting your long-term MAKES 25
almonds are also health. Don’t fear them as * 200g (about 8) pitted * 50g (½ cup) raw cacao powder
good for your heart. fattening: research shows Medjool dates * 25g (¼ cup) pumpkin seeds
Their antioxidants that eating nuts regularly * 150g (1½ cups) walnuts * 25g (1/6 cup) chia seeds
improve blood low can actually help you to
and reduce your lose excess weight.
blood pressure.
Although snacking is
no substitute for sitting down
and enjoying a well-balanced,
nutritious meal, it’s useful to have healthy
nibbles to hand for those times when we’re
on the hoof, grabbing a bite between meetings
or we’re just in need of a bit of a lift to see us
through until dinner.
The food industry has been quick to jump
on the healthy snacks bandwagon, but beware!
Most of these supposedly healthy products
are laced with sugar in one form or another
– yes, even the ones in lovely artisan-looking
packaging that make you feel healthier just
by looking at them. Instead, do some simple
meal-prep and make your own in advance.
I still snack sometimes, but I’m now very
choosy about what I opt for – I have no
intention of going back to my rollercoaster
days. Find my favourite go-to recipes on the
next few pages.
Photography Peppermint Wellness

70 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 Carry this gazpacho
EJ==OGBKN=JKJ SMART SNACKING
PDAIKRA>KKOP PDA
?=?=K>=HHO >AHKS
HABP
NA=HHUL=?G=
JQPNEPEKJ=HLQJ?D

Snacking dos
and don’ts
WHAT TO INCLUDE IN
YOUR DIET
* Protein: include a source of high-
quality protein with each meal.
Organic eggs are a fantastic
source of protein and Omega 3
healthy fats.
* Nuts and seeds: walnuts, in

Photography Peppermint Wellness

particular, are a really great
source of brain-friendly good fats.
* A rainbow of fruit and vegetables.
* Green tea gives a gentle
mental boost without the jittery
downsides of coffee.
* Lots of water: research has
shown that even the mildest

Ingredients
SERVES 6-8
Flavourful dehydration of only 1-2 percent
of body water can affect your
ability to concentrate.
* ½ red onion
* 1 clove garlic
gazpacho WHAT NOT TO INCLUDE
* 4 large, ripe tomatoes IN YOUR DIET
SIP ON THE RUN FOR A
* ½ red pepper, yellow * Low-fat yoghurts: they’re often
pepper and cucumber BRILLIANT VEGETABLE BOOST full of sugar to make them
* Small handful flat-leaf taste better.
parsley METHOD * Diet drinks: while they’re lower
* 400ml (2 cups) tomato Place all the ingredients in in sugar, they include other
juice a high-powered blender and ingredients that have been linked
* 2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil blitz until they form a thick, soup-like with a long-term risk of dementia.
* 3 tbsp apple cider vinegar consistency. Leave in the fridge to * Posh coffees: usually served with
* Salt and pepper to taste chill for an hour or two. lavoured syrups.
* 'Artisan' popcorns: they often
Finely chop some more have sugary ingredients added
cucumber and pepper and for lavour.
sprinkle on top of the gazpacho.
Add a drizzle of olive oil to serve.

SUZY GLASKIE
Suzy is a Functional Medicine Certified Health
Coach whose mission is to empower people to
reclaim their health and vitality. Read more from
Suzy at www.peppermintwellness.co.uk

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 71
 1J=?GSEPD?KJ@AJ?A
living KJPDAOAUQIIU>N=EJ
>KKOPEJC=LF=?GO 
KNO=PEOBU=O=RKQNU
?N=REJCSEPDOAA@A@
?N=?GANO >AHKSNECDP


ALL OF THE TASTY, OATY

GOODNESS WITHOUT THE
REFINED SUGAR

METHOD
Line a 10in square baking tin with baking
parchment. Preheat the oven to 160°C/
320°F/Gas Mark 3.

Melt the oil, syrup and almond butter in

a pan, stirring them together until they’re
completely combined.

Stir the oats and nuts into the mixture

in the pan, then gently fold in the
blueberries until incorporated.

Transfer the mixture to the lined baking

tin and press it down very irmly with
the back of a spoon to make sure it’s all
compressed and there are no air pockets.

Bake your lapjack mixture in the

pre-heated oven for 30 minutes, then
cool completely in the tin. Place the tin in
the fridge for a few hours, before slicing the
lapjacks to prevent them crumbling.

Ingredients
MAKES 8
* 300g (3¼ cups) oats
* 150g (1 cup) frozen or fresh blueberries
* 10 tbsp coconut oil
* 10 tbsp maple syrup
* 5 tbsp almond butter
* 150g (1¼ cups) hazelnuts, chopped

72 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 SMART SNACKING

Seeded crackers THINK ZINC

Pumpkin seeds are
packed with zinc,
PERFECT FOR PAIRING WITH A which has been proven
HUMMUS OR GUACAMOLE DIP to enhance memory as
well as improving
mood. Sprinkle them
METHOD on your porridge.
Preheat the oven to 140oC/275oF/Gas
Mark 1. Combine the lax and chia seeds
in a bowl with the water and leave them to
swell up and form a gel (at least 30 minutes).

Add the remaining ingredients to the Ingredients

bowl, and combine well.
Spread the mixture out in a thin layer
on a baking sheet covered with non-
stick baking parchment.
Bake for 30 minutes, then remove from
the oven and score the mixture into
rectangular shapes. Flip them over and return
to the oven for another 30 minutes, or until
they are crisp.
Photography Peppermint Wellness
MAKES 20
* 85g (½ cup) flax seeds
* 85g (½ cup) chia seeds
* 250ml (1 cup) water
* 40g (¼ cup) pumpkin seeds
* 40g (¼ cup) sunflower seeds
* 40g (¼ cup) sesame seeds
* 1 tbsp of a good salt
* 30g (¼ cup) za’atar (optional)
* 1 tbsp caraway seeds (optional)

Photography Peppermint Wellness

living

EASING INTO AUTUMN

Engaging with the changing season allows us to harness the shift in energy that September brings
Words: Janey Lee Grace / Illustration: Amelia Flower

s summer fades, it can be easy to start berating
ourselves. In the past I have found that I emerge
from long, lazy days convinced that I must make
up for the time spent relaxing. Surely after lots of relaxing
over the summer, it’s time to galvanise myself into a proper
itness programme and embark on a healthy eating regime
(while there have been plenty of summer salads, there
have also been lots of ice creams). I’ve often let lots of
things slip over the summer months, and feel that now
everyone is back at work, it’s time to inish projects, pitch
to publishers, start a new online course, set aside more
time to help my kids with homework... the list goes on.
But, having had the chance to actually relax and enjoy my
time, all of this resolve and running around trying to catch
up usually just ends up making me feel exhausted – and as
though I am setting myself up to fail.
There’s no doubt that the changing of the seasons is
important, and it is worth thinking about how you can
best shift your energy to suit the season. That being said,
racing around frantically, trying to make up for lost time
won’t cut it. I’ve come to realise it’s all about self-care. I’m
lucky enough to be a Hay House radio presenter, and get
to interview some amazing spiritual and wellbeing authors.
Recently, there has been an eclectic mix of guests, and the
changing of the seasons and how we take care of ourselves
often comes up in conversation.
Rebecca Campbell, author of Rise Sister Rise and the
new Work Your Light Oracle card deck, says that it’s easy
for us to become disconnected from the rhythmic pulse
of nature. We are cyclic, connected beings. As the seasons
change, so do we. The more disconnected we become
from nature, the more out of whack we can feel. One of
the easiest ways to get back into low is to notice the
season. When the leaves are beginning to fall from the
trees in autumn, ask yourself, ‘What is falling away within
me?’ or, ‘What am I carrying that I am ready to release?’.
When we take a moment to notice the changes within
nature, we also acknowledge the changes within ourselves.
Louise Allen is a holistic healer who believes that
seasonal shifts should be part of everything that we do
(www.rhythmofbeauty.co.uk). She infuses natural products
with lower essences and works with the cycles of Mother
Nature to make seasonal beauty products – I adore her day
cream. She shares her relections on the changing of the
seasons on her blog – I recommend reading it to tune in
to what’s happening during these shifts.
So, rather than putting pressure on yourself to make
up for lost time this autumn, I recommend prioritising
your self-care instead. It’s easy to feel guilty about this,
having spent all summer relaxing and enjoying our
holidays, but it’s just as important now as it was then.
Focus on setting aside a small amount of time for yourself,
perhaps ive minutes of meditation, and schedule that
irst. Once you’ve made this commitment, you’ll ind it
easier to then take more time to retreat and rest. This can
be anything that works for you; it might be taking time
out to walk, or having a lovely bath with a scented candle
and some aromatherapy oils. I like to nod to nature with
the Aromatherapy Reed Difuser from Shui Me (www.
shui-me.com). Unlike many petrochemical candles and
difusers, this is an eco-friendly, non toxic product made
with 100 percent organic essential oils – try ‘Relax’ with
lavender, ylang ylang and pettigrain.
However you honour the changing of the seasons,
make sure that you’re putting yourself irst – and not the
expectations of anyone else. By doing so, you’ll inish the
summer feeling refreshed, rather than stressed, and ready
to tackle your to-do list with a sense of calm.

JANEY LEE GRACE is a best-selling author, commentator and

co-presenter on BBC Radio 2’s Steve Wright in the Afternoon.
You can find her online at www.imperfectlynatural.com

74 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 living

UPCYCLED BAGS
Having leftover material at the start or
inish of every product’s life may seem
inevitable, but innovative brands are
now creating beautiful bags – either from
discarded scraps or unwanted items
Words: Rae Ritchie
Photography Phil Sowels

Pretty plastic
These Petal baskets are made by
artisans who have been weaving for
generations. Crafted from recycled
plastic strapping, each one is unique
and by giving new life to material
otherwise destined for landfill,
they have a minimal effect on the
environment. They come in three sizes
and a range of bright colours.
From £34.99 www.duperedesign.com
Photography Jesse Wild
Scrappy saddle bag
The Carnival Collection by What Daisy
Did is made in India from leather and
cotton that factories have discarded.
The company then passes on its
leather scraps to jewellers to minimise
waste further. Creating the bags also
provides jobs to former shoemakers
who suffered when the local industry
lost out to cheaper Chinese production.
From £29.99 protecttheplanet.co.uk
Vegan handbag
Paguro makes contemporary products
by using reclaimed tyre inner tubes,
printer belts and bike chains. To
further reduce the environmental
impact, its designers try to source the
materials from near their workshops.
With its simple, elegant design, the
Reina Black Vegan Handbag is an
ethical update on a classic style.
£75 www.paguroupcycle.com
Bouncy castle tote
You may well have seen one of
Wyatt and Jack’s totes in its former
life, perhaps even in your own garden,
as these bags used to be part of
a bouncy castle! All of its creations are
upcycled from retired bouncy castle
PVC vinyl or beach deckchair canvas.
A proportion of tote sales also goes
towards helping to plant trees.
£24.50 www.wyattandjack.com
SHOPPING
Upcycled shopper
This young brand was born when
founder Saher was working part time
in a Sussex sail loft and felt that the
vibrantly coloured surplus sailcloth
was just too nice to be thrown away.
After some experimentation, the first
Terracotta Row bags were born out
of recycled industrial materials, and
they’ve proved popular ever since!
From £49 www.terracottarow.co.uk
Unique backpack
In a converted Welsh chapel, Xandra
Jane’s designer refashions classic shirts
into unique backpacks that are both
useful and celebrate the garment’s
heritage – collars becoming handles
and former button stands becoming
adjustable straps. Workshops to
convert your own pre-loved shirts
are in the pipeline too.
£40 www.xandrajane.com
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 77
living

At just 25 years old, high-flying journalist

Jocelyn de Kwant was diagnosed with exhaustion.
It was a wake-up call that eventually lead her to step
off the treadmill and start accepting her ‘flaws’

Photography: Milan Vermeulen

mployers loved my creativity
and that I always went ‘the
extra mile’, so to speak. But
the annual feedback pointers were
invariably the same: I was a sparkling
personality, very dedicated and
creative, but a little bit too emotional,
too sensitive, and should learn to be
more structured. But nevertheless, I’d
get a “well done” and a raise.
I compensated for my ‘laws’ by just
working really hard. But somewhere
in my early career, that went wrong.
My creativity got lost, my stress levels
were high 24/7, I was exhausted, I had
panic attacks. At the age of 25, I was
diagnosed with emotional, physical
and cognitive exhaustion – also known
as burnout. It took me seven months
to get back on my feet. During those
months, I took long walks, slept a lot,
rediscovered drawing and crafting,
and had hours of therapy.
When I was ready to go back to work,
I decided to never let it happen again.
I read everything there was to read
about burnouts, about stress, about
wellbeing. At that time, 15 years ago,
that wasn’t a lot. But being a journalist,
I could investigate it for a living and
write about it. After a couple of years
of freelancing, I became the managing
editor of a successful magazine about
creativity and mindfulness. Again,
I gave it my all, but this time I would
not burn myself out. If only one day
I could master my emotional side and
be more structured, I thought, the sky
would be the limit.
I was doing ine for a long time. But
one night, I found myself sitting in the
dark with only the blue light of my
computer screen, working through
my emails to get a head start the next
day – something I had started to do
more often, because I just couldn’t get
around to doing everything during
working hours. But that particular
night, I started to receive immediate
replies from one of my colleagues, also
working at that unsavoury hour. In
her emails, I found new requests for
the next day, ruining my head start.
That was when it hit me: this doesn’t
make any sense. If even well-organised
people like my colleague have to work
at night to get things done, where does
that leave me?
It was a wake-up call. I realised that
I had slowly tricked myself again into
working at moments when I should
have been winding down. What had
started as an innocent ‘I don’t mind
working late sometimes, you get so
much done’, had become a one-way
ticket to burning out again. And it’s
not just me – we’re all behaving like
little mice on a treadmill.
In the 2016 US General Social
Survey, a study carried out every year
since 1972, 50 percent of people
answered yes to the question: “Are
you consistently exhausted because of
work?” By comparison, two decades
ago, only 18 percent answered yes.

78 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 MY EXPERIENCE

Jocelyn was diagnosed

with exhaustion at 25,
while she was working
as a journalist.
living
“Now, in the middle of
every working day, I take
a few minutes for myself”
In every developed country, people
are stressed and burnout rates are
rising, according to research.
So what is going on? More than
one expert has told me they believe
technology is to blame for a lot of
it. Apart from the fact that it easily
facilitates working all the time, it has
also introduced a new you: the ‘digital’
you. Journalist Jocelyn G Klei, who
makes the wonderful podcast ‘Hurry
Slowly’, explained to me: “We have
this one self: the physical self, who
exists in this universe and has 24
hours in a day. And there is this other
self: our digital self, with an email
inbox and a Twitter inbox and on
and on. And these selves are ininite.
We can have an ininite amount of
messages and an ininite amount of
requests and demands in our inbox.
The amount of requests I have does
not align with the amount of things
you can do in a day.”
The tricky thing, though, is that we
feel really productive when working
through our emails. It’s a quick ix
for your to-do list and it even releases
dopamine hormones in the brain. The
more emails you send out, the more
replies you can expect. If anything,
we should be sending out less mail in
order to be more productive.
Also not helpful is the fact that we
tend to forget that we are not robots.
We all systematically overestimate
what we can get done in one day. As
humans, we just do not function at the
same level every hour of the day. We
can have of days and hours when we
get nothing done. And even on
80 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
a good day, we cannot go on non-stop,
neuroscientist Daniel Levitin told me
in an interview. Multi-tasking does not
exist, he told me; instead, we sequel
task: we quickly switch between things
and burn loads of energy every time.
Even a quick glance at our inbox
messes with our concentration on a
serious level. So trying to speed things
up, actually slows us down. Between
periods of focus, we need moments
of non-focus to let our brains recover.
We need spells of staring out of the
window, of daydreaming, especially
when we need to be creative. You can’t
force or schedule an aha-moment;
creative breakthroughs only happen
when your brain is in a relaxed state.
So instead of getting angry at yourself
when you’re feeling uninspired and
fresh out of ideas, go outside and
take a walk or do something else
completely diferent for a bit.
Maybe I didn’t realise how important
taking a break was for my creativity,
but I already knew how vital it was
for my wellbeing. Especially late at
night. So why did I ignore it? Because
I always promised myself that I would
take better care of myself after I had
checked of everything on my to-do
list. In some way, I felt that it was my
own fault that I hadn’t gotten around
to checking everything of.
It was when I read Self-Compassion:
The Proven Power of Being Kind to
Yourself (Yellow Kite, £16.99) by
Kristin Nef that it hit me. “Sadly,
there’s almost no one whom we treat
as badly as ourselves,” she writes.
“Insecurity, anxiety and depression
are common in our society, and much
of this is due to self-judgement, to
beating ourselves up when we feel we
aren’t winning in the game of life.”
Instead of accepting that my
sensitivity and chaotic side were just
part of me, I was constantly blaming
myself for it. Rather than seeing those
traits as important parts of being
creative in the irst place, I was trying
to mould myself into someone who
was creative and always efficient.
And always the quickest to reply to
emails. And, while we’re at it, also
the perfect friend, mother and wife.
Kristin continues: “Even if we do
manage to get our act together, the
goalposts for what counts as ‘good
enough’ seem to remain frustratingly
out of reach.”
Yes, employers had always liked me,
but I realised that this had become
my own prison. I was afraid to let
people down. To let myself down.
I needed to get of the hamster wheel
once in a while, even if that meant
not getting everything crossed of my
to-do list. Now, in the middle of every
working day, I take a few minutes for
myself and do something completely
diferent. Drawing. Walking in the
park. Reading a couple of pages in
an interesting book. Staring out of
the window. All those things that
I’d written about, but never actually
taken the time to do.
But the most important thing is that
now, when I’m having a slow day and
get nothing done, I accept it. I am not
the perfect employee, I’m not the
perfect anything. What a relief.
 Clockwise from top:
Jocelyn is now at ease MY EXPERIENCE
SEPDDAN=SOPEIA
KQPEOREP=HSAKBPAJ
overestimate what can
be done in a day.

Five exercises
to focus on the
small things
SHUT OUT THE HUSTLE AND
BUSTLE AND FIND A NEW CALM

Watching a sunset with our full

attention evokes emotion and
calms us down, whether we’re alone
or with a loved one. Allow your mind
to drift back to a sunset that was
special to you. Where were you? How
did it make you feel?

Sketch a piece of fruit with as

much accuracy as possible. What
new things do you notice?

Find a peaceful place to quieten

your mind and listen to the
sounds of nature talking to you. Jot
down what you can hear if you ignore
all human sounds.

There is always something to

appreciate about your ordinary
day, even if your routine seems
monotonous and you live for the
weekend – you just have to look for
it! Make a quick list of what you like
about a typical day.

Close your eyes. When you

open them again, engage your
‘beginner’s mind’; look around you as
if you are seeing everything for the
irst time. What do you notice? What
really stands out for you?

Jocelyn’s book
Creative Flow. A Year
in My Mindful Life
is out now (Leaping
Hare Press, £12.99).

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 81
living

REVIEW & INTERVIEW

The Terrible
EVERY ISSUE WE’LL PICK OUT A BRILLIANT BOOK THAT
WE THINK YOU’LL LOVE TO READ. THIS ISSUE, WE TALK TO
YRSA DALEY-WARD ABOUT HER CAPTIVATING MEMOIR

Words: Sarah Ditum

rsa Daley-Ward is an actor and a model, but she made her literary
name as a poet. Her breakthrough collection, Bone, (self-published
in 2014, reissued by Penguin last year) is by turns funny and raw,
confessional-feeling and character driven, as natural as speaking and
as rich as Bible verses. It makes sense that she would follow up such
a personal collection with a memoir. Playful down to the typesetting
(certain words are printed teeny-tiny and even upside down to underline
her meaning), the voice of The Terrible is always warm but never glib.
This is key to the book’s success, because much of what Daley-Ward
has to write about is heavy; violence, substance abuse, bereavement
and sexual exploitation. Born to a Jamaican mother and an absent
Nigerian father, she was raised largely by her grandparents in Chorley,
Lancashire while her mum worked nights. Those grandparents were strict
adherents to the Seventh Day Adventist Church, meaning that Daley-
Ward and her siblings were set apart from their peers at school, not only
by race and culture (she was the only black person at her school until her
brother joined), but also by religion.
The book’s mix of incantatory lyricism and northern bathos is
reminiscent of Jeanette Winterson’s autobiographical novel Oranges
Are Not the Only Fruit, and, like Winterson, Daley-Ward is interested
in how one becomes an artist. The title, ‘The Terrible’, is both a
personiication of bleakness and trauma, and a strange kind of gift
through which poetry becomes possible. “What luck. What terriic
magic,” she writes at the end of a story that could have been nothing
but misery memoir, and you truly believe that luck and magic is exactly
what you’ve encountered with her.

82 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM

Q How did it feel moving from writing poetry
Actor, model and to writing a memoir?
author Yrsa Daley- A I don’t think there was a movement actually.
Ward encourages us I’ve always been writing, and writing is this
to turn negative huge thing – it shouldn’t be sectioned of.
experiences Really, we’re all storytellers anyway, whether
into something we write or not. Some days I feel like making it
beautiful. succinct and four lines long, and some days
I want to write continuously.
Q But this particular story touches a lot of
nerves, and in poetry you have a certain artiice.
If you’re writing a memoir, you’re saying, “this
happened to me”…
A Well yes; you can’t lie in a memoir. I was able
to tell lots of lies with Bone. I was like, “No, that’s
not about you!”. Obviously I can’t do that with
The Terrible. But when you get your ego out
of the way and you forget this is a book about
you, you treat it like you would any other story
– because we’re all going through similar things.
I’m not saying everybody’s been through a lot of
the stuf in there because I’ve lived a bit of a life,
but I think that the joy and the beauty in it comes
in that I’m giving a voice to things that happen
to people all the time. And maybe by reading it,
somebody will realise that it’s not just them that’s
had this experience.
Q Your mother comes across as a very complex
character in the book. Did writing about her
change your feelings about her at all?
A No, I always had wonderful feelings towards
my mum. I had an understanding from a really
early age that we do the best with what we’ve
got. It’s not an easy feat to bring up children,
especially as a single woman, especially as a
single woman from Jamaica and making her way,
working nights and doing all of that.
Q How did you ind your upbringing with your
grandparents? Did you realise it was different to
that of others your age where you lived?
A Nothing feels unusual to you when you’re
Photography Mike McGregor
living it, but of course we were raised in Chorley
in the north west of England so there were no
other black people and we could see that. And
because my grandparents were strict Seventh
Day Adventists, everything was diferent.
BOOK CLUB
You see your friends backchat, and they can be
out on the street at night, but you can’t do any
of that. We always ate West Indian food, and our
house was that of a typical Jamaican house – we
still had the plastic on the chairs and lots of
plastic igurines of Jesus and a lot of china.
My grandparents liked to keep things beautiful.
Q What is the ‘Terrible’?
A The ‘Terrible’ is a euphemism for lots of
things. It’s grief, it’s loneliness, it’s addiction,
it’s thoughts of suicide, it’s depression, it’s
anxiety, it’s any of those things that sit with
you constantly. Those things that you feel like
you can’t run away from, you feel are almost part
of you. And the personiication of the ‘Terrible’
was just to illustrate the fact that you can’t
escape something you haven’t dealt with.
You might think you have, but it’s just going
to appear next to you. It’ll come into your bed,
come out drinking with you, or whatever it is
that you like to do. It’ll be the third person in
your marriage. So it was important for me to
personify that, because when you feel depressed,
when you feel anxious, they are not light feelings.
They’re the diference for some people between
life and death.
Q There’s also this idea in the book of
there being a gift or a richness from these
negative experiences…
A There’s absolutely a gift in it. Negative feelings
and negative occurrences are great markers of
what’s happening in your life and where you’re
going. There’s a tendency to speak in a negative
way about negativity, but I don’t know that we
always should. It’s part of the tapestry of life. You
take that, and you sew it into your own seams and
you come out with something beautiful.
The Terrible (Penguin,
£9.99) is out now. Yrsa’s
poetry is on Instagram
(@yrsadaleyward). This
interview took place with
the support of Bristol
Festival of Ideas year-
round programme (www.
ideasfestival.co.uk).
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 83
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 MAGAZINE

ENJOY LEARNING A NEW PAINTERLY SKILL AND

READ HOW ARTIST EMMA FINDS INSPIRATION.
PLUS, LEARN HOW MOMENTS OF SILENCE CAN
LEAVE SPACE FOR CREATIVE THOUGHT.
creating

THE SOUND OF SILENCE

Tuning out from the distractions of the world around us can leave room for more creative thinking
Words: Sara Tasker (@meandorla) / Illustration: Amelia Flower

y ive-year-old, Orla, has started to insist we sit
in silence in the car. No radio, music, podcasts
or audiobooks. My husband and I are not even
allowed to talk. Her reasoning? “I need to concentrate
on my imaginations, Mama.” It’s adorable and a little
frustrating, but I can’t help thinking she’s onto something.
How often do we, as adults, make time for silence?
Not so long ago, we had to do it by default. Waiting at the
bus stop, riding the tube, the long line at the post office or
cofee shop – all of it dead time with only the thoughts in
our head for company. With the advent of iPods, and then
smart phones, we suddenly have a world of information and
entertainment at our ingertips. When we can always be
learning, doing and making headway on our goals, sitting
in mental silence can feel wasteful, lazy or indulgent. Even
our chores are conducted to this soundtrack of information
now. The only times when I’m not taking things in are in
the shower, or after I put down my phone or book at night.
But if we spend all our time absorbing other people’s
creations, when do we create things for ourselves? When
do we hear our own thoughts, and sort through the jumble
of our daily life? Now, this isn’t a rant against the dangers of
smart phones – they represent choice and communication,
and those are wonderful things. And as someone who’s
sufered with lifelong anxiety, I often welcome the ability to
distract my whirring, supercomputer brain from intrusive
or unhelpful thoughts. But when, like Orla, do we get to
concentrate on our imaginations?
Despite the quiet car rides, my daughter’s bedtime has
been slipping later each night. We put her in pyjamas and
tuck her in at the same hour, but she’s started to lie there
awake, blinking in the midsummer dusk for an hour or
so. When I asked her why, her answer was ierce: “It’s the
only time I get to have my imaginations!” Those short
car journeys home are not enough for her any more. Her
internal world – among My Little Ponies and Elsa from
Frozen, where her class teacher is her mum (!) – needs
more time and silence, so she lies awake and plays out the
stories in her head.
Meditation teacher Andrew Johnson told me the same
when I interviewed him for my podcast. He attributes
the rise in adult insomnia to this non-stop information
treadmill we’re all on, and said he sees people who can’t
sleep because when their head hits the pillow, a day’s worth
of thinking loods into their mind. I can relate to that. I’m
rarely more creative than in the half hour after I put my
phone down at night, picking it up time and again to hastily
make notes. I even bought a waterproof notepad for my
shower, because so many of my best ideas come to me then.
So, with all this in mind, I’m trying to make more time to
do nothing each day. I’ve put up a fabric teepee with Orla,
where we go and sit and make time for our imaginations
together. I would like some music to help me with this, but
Orla insists she inds it distracting. “You just need to choose
one and get started,” she tells me. So that’s what we do.
Out on walks, I’ve started to turn of my music and let the
birdsong in for ive minutes or so. There are meditation
apps that help you to introduce this relective time into
your day. But if, like me, you ind it hard to do nothing,
turn to the activities that humans have been doing in
silence for generations. Sweeping the loor with a big straw
broom, painting, drawing, sewing or craft. I’ve dug out my
old calligraphy pen and ink and spend half an hour here
and there just illing the pages with long, looping strokes.
I’m happier this way. I’m having diferent ideas, feeling
creative again. I’m writing those furtive iPhone notes all
through the day now. Try doing an Orla sometimes and
give your own imaginations some space. “You can be
anything you want there,” she tells me, but I’m increasingly
happy to just be myself.

SARA TASKER is a photographer, writer and creative coach who goes by

the name Me & Orla. She shares her beautiful images over on Instagram
(@me_and_orla) and also hosts a podcast for creatives (#HashtagAuthentic).

86 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
creating

EMMA
BLOCK
Illustrator and author Emma
shares how her work-life balance fuels
her creativity – and where she
inds her inspiration…

88 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM

I LIKE TO INSPIRE OTHER PEOPLE TO BE CREATIVE
AND TRY THEIR HAND AT DRAWING AND PAINTING
mma is an illustrator and author
who inds inspiration in vintage
photos and travel. She tells us
about her artistic career and how she
inds a sense of calm in order to create.
“As long as I can remember, I’ve
loved drawing and painting. I had
a ‘making cupboard’ when I was little,
which was full of glitter, pipe cleaners
and poster paint, and I was always
creating something. Instead of sitting
traditional A-levels, I did a national
diploma in art and design, then went
on to study illustration at Middlesex
University. I’m so happy that I got
to do art for ive whole years. I’m
also very glad that my parents trusted
that I knew what I was doing, and
didn’t make me take more academic
subjects just in case the art career
didn’t work out.
“I started working professionally
as an illustrator when I was 17,
slowly building up my client base
and portfolio while I was studying.
This meant that I could be a freelance
illustrator as soon as I graduated,
though it was deinitely tricky at the
beginning to ind work! I’ve learnt
a whole lot since then about business
and making good business choices.
“Despite doing something I love
for a living, it can still be stressful.
Sometimes things go wrong and
supplies don’t arrive in time for
a workshop, or my printer breaks
down when I need to send orders
out. Sometimes I end up taking on
too much work at once, which can
be quite challenging! I do yoga every
week, which I ind really helps me
to relax. My favourite way to unwind
at home is to have a bath and put
a podcast on.
“Having balance in my life is
important to me, to make sure I don’t
get burned out creatively. My ideal
day of from work would be a visit to
an exhibition at the National Gallery
with my husband; cofee at Notes (my
favourite cofee shop in London); then
heading up Charing Cross Road to
browse the books in Foyles. We always
end up buying something in there!
“When I’m not painting, I love
reading to relax, and this year I’ve
made an efort to read and inish more
books. I’ve got a big stack of them on
my bedside table because after I inish
reading I forget to put them back on
the shelf. Most recently I read The
Stories of Eva Luna by Isabel Allende,
The Summer Book by Tove Jansson
and The Pursuit of Love by Nancy
Mitford. Right now I am reading
Prospero’s Cell by Lawrence Durrell.
I’d recommend them all!
“When it comes to my work now,
I’d describe myself as a multi-
disciplinary illustrator, but I still
love painting as much as I did when I
was small, and all of the illustrations
PROFILE
I produce are originally hand-painted.
I like to inspire others to be creative
too and try their hand at drawing and
painting. People always assume that
if they can’t draw one thing they’re
never going to be good at art generally
– but that’s just not true! I’m useless
at drawing cars and other vehicles,
for example.
“If you want to learn to draw,
I would advise starting with
something simple. Spend time looking
at your subject before you begin
drawing, then take it slowly, and
don’t put any pressure on yourself.
Learning to draw isn’t easy and it
takes a little while. I consider drawing
and painting to be a visual language.
No one would expect to learn to speak
a language instantly, it takes a lot of
practice. The main thing is to enjoy
the experience and not put too much
pressure on yourself.
“You can ind inspiration for
your art anywhere. Travel is very
stimulating for me. Whenever I go on
holiday, I come back bursting with
ideas. But you don’t have to go away
to ind something that sparks your
creativity; I’m always looking out
for colour and pattern in every-day
life and if I see something lovely
I have to record it in my sketchbook.”
Turn the page to ind Emma’s tutorial
on how to paint your own watercolour
potted plant piece.
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 89
creating

Potted plant still life

FOLLOW EMMA’S STEP-BY-STEP INSTRUCTIONS AND
YOU’LL HAVE A WORK OF ART TO BE PROUD OF

You will need:

* Large round brush * Medium round brush * Small round brush
* Watercolour paper, about 20x25.5cm (8x10in) * Pencil * Eraser * Table salt
Paint colours:
* cadmium red pale * phthalo green * ultramarine blue * permanent
carmine * sap green * Venetian red * yellow ochre * burnt umber

First, lightly sketch out the plants
and their pots with a pencil. I have
sketched three overlapping potted plants,
but you could keep it simple with just one
to start. You want the sketch to be as light
as possible, so you can only just see it. Mix
a little bit of cadmium red pale with lots
KBS=PAN=J@HHEJPDA>=?GCNKQJ@QOEJCUKQN
large brush, making sure to avoid the areas
where the pots and leaves will be. Let the
background dry completely.
While the background is drying, start
mixing up some different shades of green.
I like to use both blue-toned and yellow-toned
greens in the same painting. Here, I mixed
phthalo green, ultramarine blue and a touch
of permanent carmine to make a turquoise-green
colour for the plant in the middle. I mixed
some sap green with a little bit of ultramarine
blue and Venetian red to paint the plant on
the left. For the plant on the right, I added
more Venetian red and ultramarine blue to the
sap green mixture. Experiment and play around
QJPEHUKQJ@OARAN=H@EBBANAJPOD=@AOKB
green you like.

90 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM

Before you start to paint the leaves, and
once the background is dry, rub out the
pencil lines with your eraser. The painted
>=?GCNKQJ@SEHH@AJAPDALKPO=J@LH=JPO
 for an interesting textured effect. Brush the
which means you don’t need the pencil lines
anymore. When you paint the leaves, apply the
colour using your medium brush in light washes
in some areas, and allow the paint to pool
in denser areas of pigment in others where the
leaves would naturally be in shadow or darker.
This gives a sense of natural variation and
the impression that light is catching the
'=@@A@=>EPKBOD=@KSPK
different angles of the leaves.
WATERCOLOURS
I painted the pots with the three shades
of red using a medium brush. While they
were still wet, I sprinkled them with salt,
salt off once they’re dry. Using a small
brush, I added a wooden stand to the pot in
the middle in yellow ochre and burnt umber.
Once the leaves are dry, add stems and veins
using a darker shade of green with your small
brush. I added veins to the middle plant using
a mixture of permanent carmine and phthalo
CNAAJ2KJEOD
the side of the pots by painting a thin line
of the same colour used for each pot.
This is an edited
extract from
The Joy of Watercolor:
40 Happy Lessons for
Painting the World
Around You by Emma
Block (Running
Press, £13.99).
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 91
creating

Your own work of art!

A masterpiece like this deserves pride of place on your wall. Don’t
be disheartened if it’s not quite there yet, experiment with the
techniques Emma has shared and see what you can create. You
never know, it could be the start of a lifelong passion…
 www.mindfulgifting.co.uk
enquiries@mindfulgifting.co.uk A TOUCH OF KINDNESS
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 MAGAZINE

Photography Hollie Harmsworth

HEAD OFF ON A GREAT ROAD TRIP ADVENTURE;

BE INSPIRED AT LITERARY FESTIVALS; BREATHE
MOUNTAIN AIR IN NORTHERN ITALY. PLUS,
MUST-PACK ESSENTIALS FOR LIFE ON FOUR-WHEELS.
 escaping

A literature festival
is what you make it –
just come along and
soak up the atmosphere.

A great book is a voyage of discovery, which is why
a literary festival is the perfect way to find and fuel
your creative side, says Rebecca Gardner
ersonally, I’ve never been tempted by the huge
crowds and loud music of Glastonbury. My
idea of a festival is somewhat diferent. For me,
they mean celebrations of books and writing: authors,
readers and the ideas that bring them together. I can be
uplifted and inspired without a muddy welly in sight. And
as summer turns to autumn, they are the perfect choice
for recharging your creative batteries before winter.
A book festival is really what you make it – strangely
they’re not even necessarily about books. “You don’t
have to have read the book, know the author – or even
have read any books,” says Rachel Feldberg, festival
director of Ilkley Literature Festival in Yorkshire, UK.
“The author talks about their ideas, which you can
follow – even if you don’t know their book. It’s about
BOOK FESTIVALS
extraordinary moments you couldn’t script and the
chance to meet people you’d never normally meet.”
The origins of a novel are often linked to life-changing
moments. Whether that moment was seemingly
insigniicant to onlookers or incredibly challenging,
you are there to hear about it irst hand. If you are
familiar with the author already, this experience can
change how you interact with their work for the rest
of your life. I saw author Dinah Jeferies speaking at
Cheltenham Literature Festival about her irst book
The Separation. Whenever I hear of her subsequent
novels, I have such a clear picture of her talking
movingly about her son (who died in an accident aged
just 14), and how that inluences her writing.
For women, especially, literature festivals are very
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 97
 escaping

“Names such as Hillary Clinton

capture festival headlines, yet equally,
emerging poets are there reading to

Photography Hay Festival

their first audience.”
easy places to visit solo. “We pride ourselves
on making you feel safe and welcome,” says
Rachel. Sarah-Jane Roberts, co-director of
the Manchester Literature Festival, explains
that the event’s audience is around 70-75
percent female, which she partially attributes
to its “showcasing of excellent women writers,
poets, biographers and activists”.
Festivals ofer so many diferent voices in one
place in just one week – especially women’s
voices. At Ilkley, Maya Angelou was so
gracious and incredibly inspiring, telling her
audience, “what literature enables us to do is
to understand each others’ lives”. Names such
as Hillary Clinton capture festival headlines,
yet equally, emerging poets are there reading to
their irst audience.
Cheltenham is my ‘local’ literature festival –
one of the world’s largest and oldest events of
this type. Regency buildings surround a large
white marquee village and deckchairs sit on
Photography Ilkley Literature Festival

the lawns of Montpellier Gardens, most years

in autumnal sunshine. Like a kid in a candy
shop, every year I try something new.

RACHEL FELDBERG
Photography Karen Ross Photography

Rachel has been festival director of the Ilkley

Literature Festival for the past 15 years. She
began her career as a theatre director and writer,
working at the Red Ladder Theatre Company in
Leeds until 1993. She has helped create a festival
Photography www.stillmovingmedia.co.uk

that attracts big names and nurtures new talent.

98 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 BOOK FESTIVALS

Photography Chris Bull, Manchester Literature Festival

SARAH-JANE ROBERTS
Sarah-Jane has worked as co-director of the
Manchester Literature Festival for the past three
years. Before this, she was the artistic director of
the Budleigh Salterton Literary Festival. Among
other things, her role involves commissioning new
work, looking after authors – and a lot of reading.

Creative workshops, festival volunteering and,

at the height of my festival bravery, taking part
in an open mic session.
A festival often gets its character from
its location. In Manchester, Sarah-Jane
recommends exploring “the wealth of literary
history and heritage in the city, as well as
brilliant walking tours following in the
footsteps of Elizabeth Gaskell and Charles
Dickens”. In the heart of London, the Literary
Footprints Festival from Footprints of London
describes itself as an annual “walking book
club” exploring the locations that inspired
famous titles. It’s on for the whole of October.
Festivals can also step into the natural world;
Photography David McLenachan

Ilkley’s visitors are right in the middle of the

Yorkshire Dales. One author demonstrated
wild swimming – the subject of his book –
in the river Wharfe before drying of and
addressing his audience. The Stanza Stones
Walk, featuring six rocks inscribed with poetry
Clockwise from top: the Hay Festival by Simon Armitage, was a collaboration with
in Wales has been running for 31 years; the festival. A short walk from local landmark
Suzanne Hindle reading from punk poet Cow and Calf Rocks takes you to the Beck
John Cooper Clarke’s work at the Stone and its poem. Or, what about books by
Manchester Literature Festival; guests the beach? The Isle of Wight Literary Festival
enjoy the atmosphere at the Cheltenham is another autumn option. And if it does rain
festival; Maya Angelou inspires her then you’re not stuck outside in a leaky tent;
audience at the Ilkley event. as Rachel suggests: “It’s a literature festival
after all – stay inside with us and a cup of tea!”
If your reading life is usually a satisfying
yet solitary afair, meeting authors and other
book lovers can be an amazing experience.
“It’s always a pleasure to see people listen
to, then meet one of their favourite authors,”

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 99
 escaping

says Sarah-Jane. “Some people

VOLUNTEERING bring gifts, some people are
Festival volunteers too overwhelmed to speak
keep things running and others cry with sheer
behind the scenes and happiness.” I love the
look after visitors and welcoming atmosphere
authors. It’s a great at the author event and
way to get a diferent the ‘after-party’: signings,
perspective. For book tents and tea rooms.
details, check out
Reading chat often lows easily
festival websites.
between strangers. Rachel puts it
Photography Chris Bull, Manchester Literature Festival

perfectly: “You are surrounded by

books, splendid people and piles of cake
– what more could you want?”
For the authors, too, this social aspect is a
huge part of visiting these festivals; creating
books, poetry and drama can be a solitary
business. “As an author, I spend a ridiculous
amount of time alone,” says Emma Kavanagh,
the successful crime writer. “Festivals allow
me a chance to get out of my own head,
spend time with my fellow authors (a hugely
supportive group) and to get to meet my
readers. They’re not only fun, but a great way
to remind yourself why you do it.”
One of my go-to book recommendations is
Our Endless Numbered Days by Claire Fuller.
She admits to pre-event nerves, although they
soon disappear. “I’m having conversations
with people who love books, and what could
be more fun?” she says. “I also love turning
Photography www.stillmovingmedia.co.uk

the questions back, and when I’m asked

something like what my favourite book is, I
like to ask the questioner the same question.
It’s a great way of getting recommendations.”

EMMA KAVANAGH
Crime writer Emma lives in South Wales with her
husband and young sons. She spent many years
Photography Adrian White

working as a police and military psychologist,

training police and military staff in the UK and
overseas and her debut novel Falling received rave
Photography www.stillmovingmedia.co.uk

reviews. Her fifth book is due out in January 2019.

100 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 BOOK FESTIVALS

Top festival
tips for novices
MAKE THE MOST OF EACH EVENT
AND COME AWAY FEELING INSPIRED

Think location. With so many festivals

on offer, you can afford to be choosy!
Plump for something fairly local, or book
an event in another town – or country –
that you’d like to visit and explore.

Be adventurous. Don’t just book to see

your favourite authors or names writing
Photography www.stillmovingmedia.co.uk
on subjects that you recognise. Take a
chance, pick a wild-card or two and open
yourself up to new experiences.

Don’t miss out. Tickets for big-name

sessions tend to get snapped up weeks
beforehand, so make sure you book your
favourites early. If you do miss out, check
for returns on the day – you may be lucky!

Ask festival staff for recommendations.

With their immersion in the event, they
may have an unusual and interesting take
on reading material.

Widen your experience with creative

workshops. Try something you’ve never
Photography Ruby Ingleheart

done before and see where it takes you.

Book accommodation early. Hotels

and B&Bs can ill up quickly when there’s
a festival in town, so plan ahead or pick
a room in a nearby village to retire to.
Clockwise from top: sharing recommendations
at the Cheltenham Literature Festival; a
wayfaring walk at the Hay event; Montpellier
Park in Cheltenham; Bake Off’s Nadiya Hussain
meets young fans at Cheltenham; actor Maxine
Peake at the Manchester festival, talking
about her role as a female stand-up in a man’s
world in the 2017 movie Funny Cow.

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 101
 Clockwise from top: free
escaping your creative spirit at a
literature festival; Shami
Chakrabarti in conversation
with Rachel Holmes at the
Manchester event; relaxing
with a good book at Hay.

“Emerging from a festival with a

head of ideas, you may start to think
about your own writing.”
This two-way conversation is so much part
of the festival experience; whether it’s a full
theatre or a more intimate session, you have
the chance to question, to challenge and
to contribute.
Emerging from a festival with a head of ideas,
you may start to think about your own writing.
So, what about a writing festival? These
events can be diferent to the pick ‘n’ mix book
festival schedule, where you select as much
or as little as you like. Attendance at writing
festivals tends to be by day ticket or packages
for a full weekend with accommodation.
Programs have key speakers and practical
workshops for every morning and afternoon.
Costs can also include short 1:1 sessions with
an agent, for those who have aspirations to
publish their work.
Attending my irst writing festival, I had an
attack of imposter syndrome. To go to a book
festival, you just need to be ‘a reader’. So to
go to a writing festival, don’t you have to be
‘a writer’, or have published something? Not at
all, assures Laurie Rose, organiser of the Write
on the Sound Writers’ Conference (WOTS) in
Edmonds, Washington State, USA. “WOTS is
small, casual… attractive to the novice writer
and hobbyist. However, there are those who
have published work (either self-published or
with an ‘indie’ press or a traditional house) and
they enjoy attending for the same reasons.”
I went to WOTS as my irst writing festival,
knowing that most of my ‘writing’ was a pile
of private notebooks. I’d never written iction.
I’d never really inished anything that could
be shared or sent to an editor. So, I chose
intriguingly titled sessions such as ‘Pitching
for beginners’ and ‘Deconstructing children’s
picture books’. I felt happy simply sitting
among the buzz. As the event was in the
USA, I was listening to many new voices, and
experiencing a wonderful Paciic Northwest
location. Really, what could be better than
planning a trip around books and the locals
who love them?
A few months after that irst writing weekend,
I found a full year’s evening course on feature
writing. Within six months, my irst hundred
words had been published in a tiny magazine
in Washington State. I still treasure my copy
of the cheque for $20 I received in payment.
That’s the thing about being inspired by
words, ideas and the people who create them,
you start to listen to your own story and you
never know where it will take you.

CLAIRE FULLER
A novelist and short-fiction author, Claire began
writing at the age of 40, having worked for many
Photography Adrian Harvey

years as the co-director of a marketing agency. She

won the 2015 Desmond Elliott Prize for her debut
novel Our Endless Numbered Days. Her third
book Bitter Orange came out in August this year.
Photography Marsha Arnold

102 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 BOOK FESTIVALS

Find a
festival to visit
DISCOVER YOUR NEAREST EVENT
OR PLAN A LITERATURE TRIP

ILKLEY LITERATURE FESTIVAL

28 September-14 October 2018
www.ilkleyliteraturefestival.org.uk

CHELTENHAM LITERATURE FESTIVAL

5-14 October 2018
www.cheltenhamfestivals.com/literature

MANCHESTER LITERATURE FESTIVAL

6-21 October 2018
www.manchesterliteraturefestival.co.uk

LITERARY FOOTPRINTS
Throughout October 2018
footprintsoflondon.com/other-events/
Photography Hannah Olinger

literaryfestival/

ISLE OF WIGHT LITERARY FESTIVAL

11-14 October 2018
www.isleofwightliteraryfestival.com

SCOTTISH INTERNATIONAL
STORYTELLING FESTIVAL
19-31 October 2018
www.tracscotland.org/festivals/scottish-
international-storytelling-festival

BROOKLYN BOOK FESTIVAL

10-17 September 2018
www.brooklynbookfestival.org

WRITE ON THE SOUND WRITERS’

CONFERENCE, WASHINGTON STATE
5-7 October 2018
www.writeonthesound.com

SYDNEY WRITERS’ FESTIVAL

Photography Chris Bull, Manchester Literature Festival

29 April-5 May 2019

www.swf.org.au

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 103
escaping

ON THE ROAD
Embracing life on four wheels can ofer a new perspective and sense of freedom like no other
Words: Sian Lewis / Illustration: Amelia Flower

“ oad trippin’ with my two favourite allies…” The
Red Hot Chili Peppers had it right, heading of on
a road trip is the ultimate way to get away from it all.
There’s something very freeing about packing a car with a
tent, sleeping gear, snacks and supplies and seeing where
the road takes you, with none of the restrictions of public
transport and the freedom to stop on a whim when you
drive past a jaw-dropping view, or an empty beach, or even
just a café with appealing-looking cakes.
Road trips remind me of the ‘Choose your own Adventure’
books that were around when I was little – do you want
to take the highway or the quiet lane? Pick left or right?
Choosing one path over another will alter your journey
forever. Or if you’re more of a planner, there’s a lot of joy
to be had in spending cosy nights before your trip with
a marker pen and a map, dreaming of roads less travelled
and highlighting the amazing places you want to visit.
Your dream road trip can be as long or as short as you
want. You could plan a huge trip along an iconic route
– you can still drive some of Route 66 from Arizona to
Missouri across the belly of America, or try the gorgeous
Garden Route along South Africa’s coast – or it could
simply be a weekend away in the next county or a day’s
jaunt to the coast. Road trips big and small are brilliant
ways to escape, and I think exploring Britain by car is
the best of all. My trips have opened up my eyes to just
how much wild, wide open space there is on our island,
something that’s easy to forget if you live in a busy city.
A few weeks ago, two friends and I drove from Inverness
in the Scottish Highlands all the way to Cape Wrath at the
very tip of western Scotland. We kept to the tiniest roads
and lanes and drove past deep lochs and through dark
forests of pines, stocking up on food in tiny white-walled
villages and watching huge emerald-green mountains
grow bigger on the horizon. We parked up whenever we
fancied – to hike into the hills, to wild camp by streams or
to investigate the ruins of once-proud castles. We camped
each night, which made our car feel a bit like our home as
well as our vehicle for the week. We used it to dry towels
on, eat lunch in, even to sit on top of for better views
across to far-of Hebridean islands. By the end of the
week our poor car was a smelly, sand-covered mess, and
we were very tanned, very midge-bitten and very happy.
Road trips are also a bonding experience. Long hours
in the car lead to weird and wonderful conversations and
shared stories – there’s something about sitting next to
someone that invites conidence and allows you to share
secrets. I also love swapping playlists and listening to other
people’s favourite podcasts – it’s not often these days that
we get to just sit and listen as beautiful landscapes slide by,
not worrying about emails and work deadlines.
Now for the practical stuf: road tripping well is all
about packing the right kit and feeling comfortable. Pack
a tent and camping kit in the boot (even if you’re booking
some places to stay, it’s nice to mix some camping in –
and it’s a good backup in case of breakdown), plus plenty
of snacks, a supply of water, a spare can of petrol and a
spare tyre. You’ll need a good mapping system – a SatNav
is great, but it’s worth having proper paper maps of your
route too, as technology has a way of failing just when
you need it most. I ind making a real efort to keep the
car as clean and tidy as possible makes life much easier!
To keep your trip carbon footprint-friendly, you could
consider bringing bikes with you so that you can use your
car as a base while you bike about to explore your
surroundings. Another option is to head to We Now
(www.wenow.com) to work out your carbon footprint and
ofset it by donating money to environmental causes.

SIAN LEWIS is a freelance travel writer and adventurer. Sian blogs at

thegirloutdoors.co.uk and her book The Girl Outdoors: The Wild Girl’s Guide
to Adventure, Travel and Wellbeing (Adlard Coles, £14.99) is out now.

104 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 escaping

ROAD TRIP KIT

Start your journey in style with our
must-pack essentials for life on four
wheels, including the perfect warm jacket,
reliable maps and an inspiring book
full of driving wanderlust
Words: Sian Lewis
Photography Hollie Harmsworth

All-rounder wear
For shorts and trousers that might just
be the ultimate in active wear, head
to Tog24. Its gear is a must-pack for
your road trip wardrobe – flattering,
comfortable, made from tough and
durable cotton and quick to dry if you
need to wash them mid-trip. They look
good with everything from smart shirts
to bikini tops; check out the Luna shorts
and Eclipse trousers for starters.
From £17.95 www.tog24.com
All-weather maps
A good, comprehensive set of maps
covering the areas you’re driving
through is an absolute essential for
a stress-free road trip. The downside
is that most maps don’t stand up
well against the elements. Instead
of paper, invest in a set of Ordnance
Survey’s Weatherproof Active maps,
which are fully waterproof and
will survive decades of use.
£14.99 www.ordnancesurvey.co.uk
Chic coolbag
Who knew cool bags could look
this, well, cool! The lovely ‘Les’ from
Millican (all of its bags are named after
the owners’ mates, nice eh?) is made
from 100 percent waterproof, natural
materials and has been designed to
carry a picnic’s-worth of food, plus
a bottle of wine or two. It’s perfect for
storing your lunch in the car, and
it doubles up as a smart carry bag.
£99 www.homeofmillican.com
Easy-pack jacket
In a world of fluoro-bright down
jackets, it’s nice to see this pared-back,
stylish olive number from Finisterre.
Slim-fitting, warm and light, the Cirrus
provides instant warmth from synthetic
fill that’s recycled (and animal cruelty-
free) and is also resistant to light
showers. It packs away into its own
pocket, making it ideal for road
trips and camping alike.
£160 www.finisterre.com
SHOPPING
On-the-go bottle
One potential challenge on remote
road trips is carrying enough water.
As well as making sure you have an
emergency supply in the boot, carry
this genius Lifestraw GO bottle with
you on your adventures. It can filter
any water source (except for sea water)
and render it safe to drink, making it
a lifesaver when you know you’re going
to be out having fun all day long.
£49.95 www.wildbounds.com
Road to freedom
Get a big dose of both inspiration
and road trip wanderlust in one book
– Lonely Planet’s Epic Drives of the
World does exactly what it says on the
tin, introducing 50 of the greatest road
trips on earth with to-die-for photos
and pretty illustrated maps. From
Hawaii’s Hana Highway to Germany’s
Black Forest High Road, your next
epic drive begins here.
£24.99 www.lonelyplanet.com
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 107
 escaping

The mountainous region of

South Tyrol is a meeting
point of countries,
rivers and cultures.
 SOUTH TYROL

Fresh air, invigorating walks and scenery to make your soul soar
– the Dolomites are the perfect place to rejuvenate, says Kirstie Duhig

Photography: Liz Schafer

or me, there has always seemed to be two types of travel

– the kind where the contents of my suitcase are largely
taken up by a king-sized beach towel and a stack of much-
anticipated novels, and the kind which involves exploring,
immersing myself in the culture, the architecture and the history
of a place. As much as I enjoy both, when I’m feeling tired and in
need of an escape from my urban day-to-day, it’s the beach I’ve
always turned to for a dose of rest and relaxation. But as it turns
out, rejuvenation can also be sought far from my usual coastal
haven: there’s restoration to be found up in the mountains too.
Since reading Johanna Spyri’s Heidi, as a child, the Alps have
held a romantic appeal for me, but a pair of dodgy ankles has
kept skiing of my agenda and the closest I’ve come to exploring
these mountains is in the pages of this enduring novel. My
irst alpine visit, then, is to South Tyrol, northern Italy, and the
Dolomites, a range that forms part of the vast Eastern Alps,

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 109
escaping

spanning Italy, Austria and Slovenia. The
Dolomites have been a UNESCO World
Heritage Site since 2009, and arriving in
Verona, the closest airport, I soon discover
that the two-hour drive to my mountain
retreat is a wonder in itself.
As we wind our way nearly 1000 metres up
through the foothills, we pass apple orchards
and vineyards stepped into the slopes. Our
journey is accompanied by the twin rivers of
Eisack and Rienz, indistinguishable as they
criss-cross our path like braids, their glacial
waters a milky blue grey. We are heading to
the picturesque town of Brixen/Bressanone,
the oldest town in South Tyrol, and the
point where the rivers meet. Like the rivers,
everything in this region has a twin: a German
and an Italian name, an indication of a past
to learn more about the region, the hotel can
organise a guided walk or you can join a local
tour via the tourist board (www.suedtirol.info/en).
On my irst morning, I join a group with a
local guide, Veronika, for a 2-hour hike. It’s
a 300m ascent from the Passo delle Erbe to
Maurerberg lodge (www.maurerberg.com),
with spectacular views across the valley to the
Dolomites’ snow-topped Geisler peaks. The
sky is a painterly mix of cerulean blue and
white, with brushstrokes of cloud that provide
welcome respite from the summer sun. Our
hike takes us along shady forest paths and
through valleys populated by leisurely-looking
Tyrolean cows, their bells jangling as they
amble along.
As we walk, the air is an earthy mix of scents
and sounds – birds call raucously across the

Photography My Arbor
less harmonious but now healed. aromatic pines, and bees hum as they lit
Once part of Austria, South Tyrol (or Südtirol) between blush-pink Alpine Roses, which
was annexed in 1919 and the region underwent lourish alongside the sunnier lengths of the
‘Italianisation’ during the Fascist period. In path. I can feel a gentle burn in my legs as we
1923, Italian was made the official language, ascend the steeper sections of the trail and
places were renamed and German (spoken by I reassure myself inwardly that my body will
the majority of the population) was banned, thank me for this afterwards. At the top of each
along with the regional language, Ladin. Today, ascent we make a ‘photo stop’ for those of us
South Tyrol has reclaimed its heritage, and the who need a breather, and I am pleased to note
region is a multi-lingual melting pot that draws that my ankles are holding up.
together the culture, food and traditions of When the mountain lodge comes into view,
both Tyrol and Italy. its gingerbread-house exterior makes me feel
My destination is My Arbor (www.my-arbor.
com), a new wellness hotel built on the slopes
of the Plose mountain. We round a hairpin
bend and the building appears, majestic,
resting on a series of tree-like stilts. My room,
a ‘Nest’, is cool and airy with a large balcony
and comfy daybed with a panoramic
view of the valley and the town below. It’s
sophisticated and luxurious without being
pretentious; the perfect place to wind down
and allow yourself a little TLC.
While my usual form of recuperation involves
doing a lot of very little, being in the mountains
means hiking is de rigueur. There are plenty of
Photography Kirstie Duhig

well sign-posted trails that you can take straight

from the hotel (South Tyrol reportedly has
more than 13,000km of natural, marked hiking
trails) but if you’re travelling solo, or want

110 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM

Photography My Arbor
Clockwise from top: My Arbor hotel rests on tree-like
stilts; a 'Nest' suite is the perfect place to relax;
South Tyrol's picturesque mountain trails are easy to
follow; Kirstie takes a moment to absorb the view.
SOUTH TYROL
Where to stay
ESCAPE TO A WELLNESS
HOTEL SET IN THE MOUNTAINS
MY ARBOR, PLOSE
Nest suite from €139 per person/half
board per night based on 2 people
sharing. This package includes the use
of the hotel's two saunas and pool,
breakfast and 5-course dinner.
www.my-arbor.com
as though I’m in Austria, rather than Italy,
and I’m reminded that in winter this whole
region becomes a ski resort, cloaked in snow.
It’s a wonder that this lush, green landscape
thaws and is reborn in such splendour each
spring. Maurerberg’s owners greet us warmly
in English and German, ofering us a Hugo
to drink. “It’s the speciality of the region,”
Veronika explains. “It’s named for the barman
who invented it.” This refreshing mix of
elderlower cordial, soda water, fresh mint and
a splash of Prosecco is an instant favourite.
The lodge’s menu is a typical Tyrolean blend
of Italian and German dishes. We begin with
antipasto – a sharing plate of salami, smoked
ham and local hard cheese, served with a spicy
horseradish and a basket of schüttelbrot (or
‘shaken bread’) – a traditional farmer’s bread,
which is baked then cut into chunks and
shaken in the tray as it’s baked again to dry
it out and preserve it. It’s delicious. This is
followed by hearty German dumplings, made
from a mix of crumbled bread, fresh herbs
and cheese with a herb butter dressing. It’s a
fortifying combination that fuels our descent!
A sauna and a swim at the hotel revive my
tired legs and the next morning I wake up
feeling energised, refreshed and ready for more
of this marvellous mountain air. Plose cable
car station is a short walk from the hotel and
promises incredible views from the outset –
WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 111
 escaping

in less than 10 minutes the car walk, we pause and Marco leads us through
BREATHE climbs 1000 metres. The view a short meditation. I try to absorb as many of
IT ALL IN from the top station, which the scents and sounds of the forest as I can
Pine trees are acts as a ski lift in winter, is before I return to city living. “Trees are like
often found at high a heart-soaring panorama people – they care for each other,” Marco
altitudes – enjoy their across Bressanone, with the says. “They can identify their ofspring and
fresh scent and reap beautiful Pusteria valley in they look after them. Some of their roots are
the beneits of the north and Isarco valley kilometres long and they send nutrients by
reduced stress and in the south. joining their roots underground.” I think about
clearer sinuses. My guide this morning is this, and seeing my own family when I get back,
Bettina, who takes our group and it makes me smile. I’m already planning
along the ‘Woody walk’ – an easy my return with them to these soul-soothing
hour-long trail that follows the Plose mountains, so that they can experience the
mountain on one side with spectacular views mountain air for themselves.
across the Dolomites on the other. As I start my journey home, I’m reminded
Half way along the walk we come to a Kneipp of the quote from Scottish-American naturalist
Garten. ‘Kneipping’ is a form of naturopathic and author John Muir: “You are not in the
water healing, based on the efects of cold mountains, the mountains are in you.” Feeling

Photography Kirstie Duhig

water on the skin, designed to stimulate blood re-centred and refreshed, I’d like to think that
low and strengthen the immune system. The I’m embodying his words, bringing a little of
aforementioned ‘garden’ turns out to be a the mountains home in me.
ladder of small pools created from stones and
pebbles. We are encouraged to take of our
hiking boots and walk up one side of the ladder
and down the other. The water is icy cold and
my feet tingle at the change in temperature.
“Every day I try to take a ‘Kneipp cofee’,”
Bettina tells me, a practice named for its
cafeine-like energy kick. Bettina shows me
how it’s done and we sink our bare forearms
into a trough of fresh water, feeling the cold
sting before removing our arms and shaking
them gently to stimulate the blood low. She’s
right. It’s better than an espresso!
The trail ends at the lovely Rossalm lodge
(www.rossalm.com), where we stop for another
Hugo and a rest before hiking back to the cable
car station. Back at the hotel, I treat myself to
a massage, then sit and take in the view with
a glass of fresh herb tea. Despite a few achy
muscles, my mountain hikes have energised
me, and I actually feel rested with none of the
sluggishness I sometimes experience after
a day spent lounging on the beach.
On my inal morning, there’s just time to
take a walk with My Arbor’s forest bathing
guide, Marco, before I make the journey back
to Verona and onwards to home. During our
Photography Kirstie Duhig

112 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 SOUTH TYROL

Things to do in
South Tyrol
MAKE THE MOST OF THIS
MOUNTAINOUS REGION

MOUNTAINCARTS
Clockwise from top left: If you fancy an adrenaline rush, try
Bettina (right) leads the riding a mountaincart down the 9km
hike along the 'Woody Walk'; run from the top of Plose cable car
spectacular views; Lake station to the bottom. Similar to a
Kaltern is the warmest in go-kart, there are no engines or
the Alps; walk through pedals, just brakes. The descent
the Kneipp Garten for a takes around 30 minutes!
natural energy boost. www.plose.org/en/mountaincarts

THE MESSNER MUSEUMS

The greatest mountaineer of all time,
Reinhold Messner is from Brixen/
Bressanone. He is the irst man to
climb every mountain over 8,000
metres, and all without bottled
oxygen. An architectural engineer
and keen environmentalist, Messner
has also designed and created six
Messner Mountain Museums in
different locations across South
Tyrol celebrating the culture and
history of high altitude areas.
www.messner-mountain-museum.it

LAKE SWIMMING
There are a number of beautiful
freshwater mountain lakes in South
Tyrol which are suitable for swimming.
Lake Kaltern is the warmest lake in
the Alps and you can also take a dip
in Lake Göller and Fennberg lake –
all of which are a short drive from
Brixen/Bressanone.
www.suedtirol.info/en

WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM 113
 MAGAZINE

LIFE LESSONS

“There are no limits to what

the mind can achieve”
WHEN NATALIA BOJANIC DECIDED TO TACKLE AN UNEXPECTED CHALLENGE,
SHE FOUND STRENGTH IN WAYS SHE COULD NEVER HAVE IMAGINED

W hen I booked a trip to Nepal to study

Buddhism, I didn’t realise how much
I would learn about myself. I loved practicing
yoga and the mental wellbeing it brought
me, and I wanted to gain and share a deeper
understanding about the nature of the mind.
When I told a friend about my trip he suggested
I trek to Everest Base Camp – that walking the
Himalayas is the real journey to enlightenment.
The idea gave me butterlies. I’d never trekked
before, was scared of heights, and for a Brazilian
the mountains in winter are not my natural
environment! But the trek would give me the
chance to see if this meditation thing was working.
If I could remain with an undisturbed mind for
this endurance test it’d be a tangible way to
experience the real beneits of meditation. And, I
always encourage people to run towards their fears.
With the average temperature at this time
dropping to -17°C, I spoke to adventurer Bonita
Norris, who climbed Everest when she was only
22. I’ll never forget her advice: “When things
get tough, all you have to focus on is where your
foot lands and keep moving forwards.”
After four weeks meditating in a monastery,
I didn’t believe my body would be ready for 4-8
hours a day trekking at high altitude. But I made
a vow to be kind to myself and respect my limits.
Nine days later, without a blister or any sign of
altitude sickness, eating garlic soup for breakfast
and protein shakes for dinner, I made it to Everest
Base Camp. That day, I realised that there are no
limits to what the mind can achieve. We all carry
an unbelievable amount of strength inside us
and as long as we show willingness to take the
irst step, we’ll be supported on our journey.

Natalia Bojanic teaches mindfulness via her meditation app, Sexy Mind. She is also the co-founder
of plant-based nutrition brand Form (www.formnutrition.com). She believes that feeling good is
a necessity, and that we all have the ability to realise the greatest version of ourselves.

114 WWW.CALMMOMENT.COM
 NEW
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 MAGAZINE

MINI MAGAZINE

We’d like to make it easy

for you to pause and relax
so we’ve created this mini
magazine, which includes
a short story & soothing
drink recipe
 TAKE A MOMENT

W elcome to your extra mini magazine, a chance

to create a few mindful moments for yourself and
keep everyday distractions at bay.
This issue, Take a Moment includes a recipe for an
autumnal drink and a short story. We’d like to encourage
you to gather the ingredients and enjoy the process of
preparing your drink, then sip slowly as you immerse
yourself in an engaging story. This issue, it’s a piece of
non-iction by Ashleigh Young, about a thought-provoking
experience she had while on a light to Wellington,
New Zealand. We hope you enjoy it.

KIRSTIE DUHIG Editor

3
 TAKE A MOMENT

Herbal wine
IMBUE YOUR FAVOURITE RED WITH
HERBS AND SPICES FOR A DRINK
THAT’S FULL OF AUTUMN FLAVOURS

Ingredients
MAKES 750ML
* 1 cinnamon stick, crushed * 1 tsp orange zest

* 1 tbsp peeled and grated * 1 tsp fresh rosemary leaves

fresh ginger * 3 bay leaves

* 1 tsp ground allspice * 1 bottle red wine (I recommend

* 1 tsp dried juniper berries Shiraz or Cabernet Sauvignon)

* 1 tsp cloves * Honey, to taste

RECIPE WRITER METHOD

Rebecca is an author, Put the spices, orange zest and herbs into a 1 litre sterilised jar and pour
urban farmer and the red wine over. Seal the jar tightly and shake well. Store in a cool, dry
entrepreneur who loves
place, out of direct light. Shake every day or so for up to 2 weeks.
to share simple skills
from the past to make After a week, taste to see if you can taste the herbs. If it tastes good,
our present better. strain out the herbs and spices using a muslin-lined sieve and return to
www.rebecca a 750ml sterilised jar or glass bottle. You can add some honey to taste.
sullivan.com.au
Seal and store in a cool, dark place for up to 6 months. Once opened,
keep in the fridge and use within 2 weeks.

Recipe reproduced
with permission
from The Art of
Herbs for Health by
Rebecca Sullivan
(Kyle Books, £9.99).
 RECIPE

Serve over ice, or

gently heat as the
evenings draw in

Herbs and
spices pro mote
digestion
 TAKE A MOMENT

Window seat
BY ASHLEIGH YOUNG

t 8:20 on Thursday morning I found my seat,

the middle of the row over the wing of the plane,
sat down, and switched on my Kindle. I was
reading The Examined Life, Stephen Grosz’s account of
his experiences as a psychoanalyst, and I had reached the
last section, ‘Leaving’, in which Grosz has taken on
a new patient, a young man, who has just been diagnosed
with HIV. The young man is beginning to spend all of
his psychoanalysis sessions in deep, still, heavy silence,
sometimes even falling asleep. I was at the part where Grosz
is describing the diferent kinds of silences that patients
sometimes bring to him – silences of refusal, discomfort,
repression – when a tiny, withered woman with a huge
pufy black bag over her shoulder indicated that she had the
window seat beside me. I got up and helped her manoeuvre
her bag into the overhead compartment, then she sat down
and set about making herself comfortable; she took of her
shoes, revealing papery brown feet, and arranged a blanket
beneath her seat so that her feet had a resting place – her
legs, in leopard-print leggings, were too short to reach the
loor. She took out her own Kindle, which was kept in
a proper zippered case, and I went back to Grosz and the
young man in the therapy room.
“Under ordinary circumstances,” Grosz was saying,
“I might ask a patient who has been silent for some time
what they’re thinking or feeling, and once or twice I did

6
 SHORT STORY

this with Anthony. But I soon realised that my speaking was

an intrusion, a disturbance.” I stopped reading because
I couldn’t focus. I was sensing a slight but building pressure
between the window-seat woman and myself. It was a
sense that she was about to say something, that she wasn’t
really going to read; she was just iddling with the device
while she decided where she would start with me. Sure
enough: “If you see me popping pills or dragging on an
inhaler, don’t you worry.” She had a bright Queensland
accent, with an unexpected burr, almost Scottish-sounding.
“Bronchiectasis. Much worse than asthma. Had it for years,
so I’ve got all these scars on my lungs. Big knotty scars.
Bronchiectasis. Last time I left New Zealand I took this
sickness with me; now I’m going to give the bloody thing
back!” She motioned at her tiny chest. “I’ve had about a
hundred pneumonias and a fair few operations. It was all the
mould in New Zealand. That’s why I moved away to Australia.
But I’m tough. Don’t worry if you see me puffing away.”
She looked at me sideways; blue eyes in a small tanned
face, and one of those open-mouthed smiles that made it
look as though she was silently saying “Aaah!”. She pulled
a plastic lunch container out of the front seat pocket, cracked
open the lid, and took out an egg sandwich, which she
ate while swinging her feet and looking out the window.
We were right above the wing. Outside on the tarmac an
electric cart was shuttling about, a igure in high-vis at the
wheel. “Sometimes when you’re between New Zealand and
Australia,” she said between mouthfuls, “if you look down
you can see a rainbow circle in the sea. A glassy sort of
rainbow, like a big bowl. I always get the window seat so

7
 TAKE A MOMENT

I can see it, because it’s beautiful. But we won’t be able to

see it with that darn wing there.” I said it was a shame about
the wing, and she said, “No, not a shame, it’s just the way
it’s happened.”
She was quiet for a while, and in the meantime another
elderly woman sat down in the aisle seat, to my left. She was
dressed in shimmery black clothing and had white-blue hair,
and bronzer on her cheekbones. She had the look of a dulled
but beautiful gemstone, maybe an opal.
I helped the opal woman adjust the direction of the tiny fan
above us so that it was blowing directly into her hair; then
we sat down. I was probably a frustrating barrier between
the two women, making it less likely that they would talk
to each other, when they might have more to say to each
other – but then a middle-aged woman came down the aisle
and handed the opal woman a packet of jelly beans. “You’ll
need these for energy, Mum.” Her mother thanked her and
tucked the jelly beans away, then reclined her seat and put
her sleeping mask on.
“Last time I lew, I got terrible altitude sickness,” the
window-seat woman whispered to me. “It was years ago.
I remember lying on the loor under the seats thinking
I might be dying. Suddenly the word ‘God’ came to me.
‘God, God, God, God.’ I felt like the word was beaming into
me right down the centre, like a torch beam, illing me with
the word ‘God,’ and I thought, ‘Well, if this is dying, it’s
all right’.”
“That must have been incredibly stressful,” I said, and
she jutted her chin upward, squinting.
“It’s how it happened, and it got me to where I needed to be.”

8
 SHORT STORY

She looked out at the wing. “This is the irst time I’ve
lown in many, many years. I haven’t been able to, with my
sickness. But if I make it this time, it’s a sign I’ll be able to
make it to Switzerland, where my son lives. This is my test
light, you see.” She gave the open-mouthed smile again.
“I’m meeting my sister in Wellington. First time I’ve seen
her in ive years. We were born in Invercargill. I had to leave
because of the mould.” Then she told me about the irst time
she’d been up in a plane, when she was sixteen. Her friend’s
father was a pilot, and he had a small plane. They all went
up together in the small plane and did acrobatics for half an
hour. “Straight after the light, my friend and I went of to
a dance. All dressed up in our miniskirts. I was feeling so
sick. My very irst dance, I vomited all over my partner!
He was very annoyed with me.”
We were still on the tarmac, and I was already feeling tired,
because even though I’d enjoyed listening to the woman’s
stories, I’d had to react with surprise and delight at them.
My energy for talking to strangers gets depleted quickly.
Maybe sitting next to window-seat woman would be too
much. But she was quiet now, and soon we were in the air,
and Brisbane, with its pale sky and all its evenly tanned
people in sunglasses and sleeveless tops, was dropping away.
I had been up since quarter to ive because I’d had to walk
to the train station with my friend James, who was lying
back to Darwin. I closed my eyes and fell into a blank doze.
When I opened them again I felt heavy and sad. I always feel
a bit sad on lights between countries. I can’t help thinking
about the past and the future and where I will end up. The
geographical limbo seems to emphasize a limbo I feel in

9
 TAKE A MOMENT

myself. I was staring into space, thinking about all this,

when the woman suddenly said, “My brother’s a cross-
dresser,” and I was jolted back into our little row. “Been
doing it for ten years, and has never been happier,” she said.
“He’d always felt pulled in all directions as a young man – he
just wasn’t ever himself. What grief. Imagine it. And when
he was ifty, he met this wonderful woman who told him
to just let go. Just let it out. And he started dressing like a
woman, these lovely skirts, colourful shoes, and he and this
woman who’d told him to do it, they ended up married. It
was a real eye-opener for our whole family. We all loved him,
but now we had to learn how to love him as a lady, too.”
I got the sense she’d told the story numerous times but
that she liked to tell it because it conirmed something she’d
long believed about people and about their true selves.
“It’s an amazing way to have your whole world opened up,
you know.” She prised another sandwich from her plastic
container and started to eat. We were lying over the clouds
now, and were quiet again for a time.
When the opal woman took of her mask and shakily
stood to make her way toward the toilets, I stood up too.
The window-seat woman followed. Ordinarily I would’ve
felt irritated, but with this woman I didn’t. She didn’t seem
needy or searching with her stories. She didn’t seem to
expect anything from me. She would have told the same
stories to whoever was seated beside her. We queued
together at the end of the aisle, while the people in the toilets
took what seemed like a very long time. Window-seat woman
looked at me incredulously. “Funny how some people take
so long. Just like life, isn’t it?” Then she looked ixedly at me

10
 SHORT STORY

and said: “About forty years ago my brother – not the cross-
dresser one, the other one – was lying over Saudi Arabia,
and the plane got hijacked. It was in the days when it was
easy to hijack a plane. The hijackers made the pilots land
in a desert.” The thought crossed my mind then that the
woman could be lying, at least exaggerating. “They had to
stay there for two days until they were rescued. My brother
was ine in the end, and no one was killed. But he came back
to us very much older.” She gave a strange, sad laugh. “And
later on, he ended up dying of AIDS. What a mystery.”
A toilet door inally opened and she went in while I stayed
waiting in the aisle. I thought about the woman’s brother,
and about the young man lying silently on the couch in the
psychoanalyst’s office. It had taken Grosz a long time to
understand that all Anthony needed was not to feel alone.
He didn’t need to talk, but he wanted to fall asleep without
fear, knowing that when he was gone he stayed present and
alive in the mind of another.
Back in our seats, the woman told me that she’d once been
a bikie in the Hells Angels – had probably been one of
New Zealand’s irst female bikies – but got in trouble with
the police so had to give it up; that she’d been thrown out of
numerous nightclubs as a youngster because her skirt was
too short; that once she went to an auction at Lyall Bay and
her young daughter had tripped over in front of her, and
when she reached out to pick her up she made a particular
motion that made the auctioneer think she was bidding, and
she ended up buying a big oak table. She told me that it was
in Lower Hutt when her real life began, because it was here
that she realised she was a healer.

11
 TAKE A MOMENT

What happened was this: A friend had arrived in Lower

Hutt after a long light, and he had hurt his elbow lifting a
heavy suitcase. She had put her hands on his elbow to rub it
and comfort him, and when she did, something happened.
“I felt this strange, powerful tingling in my hands and
arms, and I thought I must be getting pins and needles.
After a few moments, I had this strong feeling that my
friend’s elbow was better now. I took my hands away, and he
said, “Gosh, my elbow feels much better.” I said to myself,
‘I’m a healer, I’m a healer!’” She said that many years later,
she ended up with her own healing practice in Zurich.
Her husband earned all the money, so she didn’t charge
for her healing services.
It was possible that she was recklessly inventing. Who
easier to tell an imagined life to than a stranger on a plane
whom you’ll likely never see again? The geography and
timescale of her life was erratic – she had mentioned
Invercargill, suburbs around Wellington, Paekakariki, all
over Europe, all over Australia – and it was hard to igure
out who she was without being able to connect her irmly to
one particular place. The past seemed so vivid to her that it
was also hard for me to grasp that some of the stories she was
telling took place more than forty years ago. I made up my
mind not to decide there and then whether she was telling
the truth. I wanted to stay open for as long as I could.
I was wide-awake when she said, with resolve: “Now, I’m
going to tell you about you.” She had not expressed any
particular interest in me until this point, beyond asking me
how old I was and what I did for a living. Opal woman was
having a whispered conversation with her daughter, who had

12
 SHORT STORY

come down the aisle holding a miniature hairbrush.

“You love your cat,” the window-seat woman said; “you
love your cat very much, and you love all animals.” I realised
that she must think she had psychic abilities, along with
healing abilities. There was nothing to do but play along;
I was trapped here. I told her she was right about the cat and
the animals. “You’re very gentle,” she went on.
“At your core you are very gentle, though you can be spiky
on the outside.” How does one disagree? Isn’t that the basic
human condition?
“Where do you live..? I’m seeing you living on the top of a
hill. Steep hill. And you’re zipping about on the roads, very
quick, very zippy. An explorer.” She motioned with her hands.
“You’re very like your mother but you think she talks too
much. Your father is a bit hazy to me.” She frowned for a
while. “You have more of a connection with one of your
brothers than the other one, perhaps.” Then she shook her
head. “I could go on and on, but it wouldn’t do either of us
any good.” She laughed and said, “I will just say, I don’t see
any black marks ahead. Isn’t that great!” She peered at me.
“I also will just say, you need to clean your glasses.”
We spent some time in quiet. I tried to read my book again.
Anthony had not died – in fact, after being told he might
have two years left and that essentially he had no future, he
had lived for a very long time. “I now think that Anthony’s
silences expressed diferent things at diferent times,” Grosz
was saying. “Sorrow, a desire to be close to me but stay
separate, and a wish to stop time.” Anthony was still alive
at the chapter’s close, and then I began a new chapter,
about a woman named Alice P., who was trying to grieve

13
 TAKE A MOMENT

for a baby she had lost, but wasn’t able to.

We were ten minutes from landing when the woman turned
to me and said, “I wanted to save this till the very end. I see
some big changes ahead for you. Your life is going to go like
that.” She made a zig-zaggy motion with her hand. “Yes,
you’ve spent so much time putting others irst, and it’s your
turn now.” She looked at me with such kindness that I put
aside, for a moment, the knowledge that this is what psychics
routinely tell their charges, because this is what people want
to hear. Everyone wants to feel chosen. Being told “it’s your
turn now,” feels like being praised, or needed, or pursued.
But then she said, drily, “I don’t suppose you’ve met the love
of your life.” I was lustered and felt a surge of annoyance. It
was her knowingness, and her lippancy. I told her, “I’m not
sure I believe in that expression ‘love of your life.’ But I feel
that maybe I have, actually, back home.” She said, “Well,
let’s see. You’re at the perfect age. Women come right at
your age. Men never really come right.” I got really annoyed
then – maybe she would go on to ask someone else if they
had found the love of their life, and that person would grow
doubtful about all of their decisions and throw everything
away – and turned on my Kindle and read that Grosz’s sister
had been to speak to a clairvoyant when she had lost her
home and all her possessions in a brush ire in California.
Grosz’s sister said that through the clairvoyant she’d spoken
to her and Grosz’s mother, who had been dead for more
than twenty years, and Grosz was surprised to ind himself
tearful. “What did Mom say?”
We were descending quickly into Wellington now and
I could see the hills and houses taking on their familiar

14
 SHORT STORY

edges. The pilot had announced that the local temperature

was 12 degrees Celsius – about 54 Fahrenheit – with a
strong southerly wind, and a shriek had gone up from all
the Queenslanders on board. I inished my book, and found
myself crying. Window-seat woman murmured, “Jerry must
be missing you.” Jerry is the name of my cat. She said, “Is
that his name? Jerry? He’ll be glad to see you.” I managed to
say, “Yes, yes it is,” even as I was shaking my head. At some
point I must have said Jerry’s name, I must have, but as
I combed carefully back through our conversation, I was
sure I hadn’t.
After we landed and were waiting for the seat belt sign to
turn of, she said to me, “Do they still call Wellington the
City of Angels? They always said that the angels help planes
to get down safely to the ground.” I said no, I was sure they
had never called it that. Then I helped her to pull her bag
from the overhead compartment and a few minutes later
she was swallowed by the steadily moving line of passengers
ahead of me.

About the author

This is an edited extract from
Photography Russell Kleyn

Can You Tolerate This? (£14.99,

Bloomsbury), a collection of non-
iction essays by Ashleigh Young.
Ashleigh is an award-winning
author and editor at Victoria
University Press. She teaches creative writing at Victoria
University’s Institute of Modern Letters and lives in
Wellington, New Zealand, with her cat, Jerry.

15
 MAGAZINE

TAKE A MOMENT

“Sometimes what
you’re looking for
comes when you’re not
looking at all.”
Simple ways to feel calm & cared for
By Harriet Griffey
Author of “I Want To Be Happy”
 Illustrated by
Becki Clark

2
 “Being able to focus or ‘switch off’ from
distractions is an important way to manage the
many stressful demands of daily life. Whether
mindfulness is a totally new idea to you or it’s a
practice you want to strengthen or renew, take
>iÌÜÌVÃ`iÀÌÃLiiwÌÃ>Ã>ÌvÀ
living. The beauty of mindfulness is in its simplicity;
it’s a practice you can easily bring into your day to
day routine. Just a few minutes of regular practise
can help you to reduce stress and face the
challenges of daily life feeling calm and cared for.“

Haiet Griffey
In The Moment columnist and wellbeing author

3
 What is mindfulness?
Mindfulness is a process of bringing conscious
attention to what you’re doing. It is about
being ‘in the moment’ and can be used
whether you are reading a book, taking a
yoga class, walking to work or having a bath.
In addition, we can use these activities to
promote a practice of mindfulness, because
when we consciously engage with an activity,
it helps us to focus our thoughts. When done
consistently, mindfulness becomes a way of
being in the moment that reduces stress and
brings a sense of calm purpose into our lives.

4
 There are no shoulds, musts or any one
way to practise mindfulness. What is useful
ÌÕ}ÃÌw`>Ü>ÞÌ>ÌÜÀ ÃvÀÞÕ>`
practise it regularly, even when you feel you
don’t need it – by doing this, it will be more
accessible to you when you do. The more
we practise, the more this strengthens the
neural connections that support our ability
to concentrate and reduce distracting
ÌÕ}ÌÃ]>`Ìii>ÃiÀÌÃÌw`vVÕð

5
6
Think back to when you were a child or watch
one at play. They absorb every last drop of
experience and their concentration can be
total, from watching a ladybird slowly walk
along a twig to playing with a much-loved toy
or dropping a pebble into a puddle to see the
water ripple. They are absolutely present in
that moment, and you, too, can regain
that feeling through mindfulness.

7
 What are the benefits?
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“When we get too caught up
in the busyness of the world,
we lose connection with one
another – and ourselves”
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Meditation Society in Massachusetts, USA
 How does it work?
Mindfulness helps restore feelings of calm and
focus. It resettles our internal physical self,
lowering our heart rate and blood pressure, which
in turn makes us feel calmer. When our body is
calmer, this sends a message to our mind that tells
us we are calmer. The body-mind connection is
very real, and this is something we can use to help
us in our practice through mindful breathing.

11
 “An important part of mindfulness is
reconnecting with our bodies, as well
as the sensations they experience. This
means waking up to the sights, sounds,
smells and tastes of the present moment.
That might be something as simple as the
feel of a banister as we walk upstairs.”
Professor Mark Williams, former director
of the Oxford Mindfulness Centre

12
Your mindfulness practice
Experiment with the mindfulness
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the practices that suit you best...

13
 Mindful breathing
In all mindfulness or meditative practice, the
breath is key and learning breathing techniques
will help facilitate this. Introducing a mindful
breathing practice, starting at 10 minutes twice
a day and building on it, will make the ability to
take some restorative ‘time out’ always available
to you, whenever you need it. Breathing mindfully
also helps stimulate the vagal nerve that runs

14
 from the base of the skull all the way to the gut, via
the throat, heart and stomach. This nerve acts as a
‘brake’ on the nervous system, calming these body
«>ÀÌÃ]>`i«}ÌVÕÌiÀ>VÌÌi¼w}ÌÀy}̽
stress reaction. This, in turn, will regulate our internal,
physical response to stress. It’s a two way process:
manage the body to manage the mind and vice
versa. We all have the tools we need, we just need
to know how to use them. Here’s how...
 Conscious breathing
* iVvÀÌ>LÞÌiyÀÜÌÞÕÀ iiÃ
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16
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17
 “Breath is the bridge that connects
life to consciousness, which unites
your body to your thoughts...

18
Whenever your mind becomes
scattered, use your breath
as the means to take hold
of your mind again.”
Thich Nhat Hanh, Vietnamese
Buddhist monk and peace activist

19
20
 Mindfulness meditation
Once you’ve learned how to calm the breath, the
next step is meditation. Our mind likes to wander;
it always will, even when you’re trying to quieten
it. The point of this meditation is not to stop this,
but to be aware of its wandering and consciously
return to its focus point. Over and over again,
like doing reps in the gym to build physical
muscle memory, this process of constantly
bringing your attention back to a focal point
works to train your mind. You can use your
breathing practice, in conjunction with counting
or the repetition of a word (a ‘mantra’), to do so.

21
22
 Throughout your day
Remind yourself to do just one thing at a time.
Don’t multi-task. Give whatever it is that you’re
doing your undivided attention, whether this is
eating, walking, reading or talking to a friend.

23
24
 Take time to pause
Take a moment and turn everything off.
Phone alerts, computers, iPads, television,
radio. Just sit in silence and listen to your breath.
Ì>ÞviiÛiÀÞÕÕÃÕ>>ÌwÀÃÌ]LÕÌÕÃÌ>ÜÞÕÀ
thoughts to come and go in the quiet.

25
 “Meditation is not a way of making
your mind quiet. It’s a way of entering
into the quiet that’s already there –
buried under the 50,000 thoughts the
average person thinks every day.”
Àii«> 
«À>]V >ÕÌÀvThe Healing Self:
Supercharge your immune system and stay well for life
 Visualisation exercise
Imagine a pool of water in a beautiful setting.
In your mind’s eye, see its colour and stillness.
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ÌÌi`i«Ìð-iiÌiÀ««iÃÌ> iÃ>`
LÃiÀÛiÌiÜ>ÌiÀV}L>V ÌÃÌiÃð
Repeat as many times as you need.
28
 Be aware of sensations
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>«ÜiÀvÕivviVÌÌiLVÃÞÃÌivÌiLÀ>°

29
 Keep note
Carry a notebook with you and write
down all the small things that inspire and
connect with you. A quote that resonates,
>ÀiyiVÌ>L`i]>ivÀ>
poem, a cherished memory that comes
Ì`]ÀÃiÌ}vÀÜVÞÕvii
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>`Ì> }>iÌÌvVÕÃÌÃ>ÜÃ
ÌiÀi>Ã>ÌvÜ>ÌëÃÌÛiÞÕÀvi°

30
31
 “Practice presence.
Embrace the place
where life happens.”
Eckhart Tolle, spiritual teacher
and author of The Power of Now

32
 Exercise mindfully
Concentrating on the physical processes of your
body, whether this is kicking a football in a team,
playing tennis with a partner, doing yoga or Pilates
alone or in a group, focuses your attention. Being
mindful about this increases the two-way process
that beds it in. Some exercise, like Tai Chi, is a
form of meditation in movement and a literal
embodiment of mindfulness. Factor in a
period of mindful exercise every day.

33
 “Do something every day that is loving
toward your body and gives you the
opportunity to enjoy its sensations.”
Golda Poretsky, holistic health counsellor
and founder of Body Love Wellness

34
 Self massage
Reconnect your physical and mental self by
giving yourself a hand massage. You can use
a delicious smelling hand cream or lotion, or
just some almond oil with a few drops of your
favourite essential oil, but concentrate on
ViÀÃ}ÌÃi>À`ÜÀ }>`ÃvÀwÛi
minutes. Appreciate the amazing work they do
and restore their strength and suppleness.

35
 Walking
If you can, walk. The act of walking even a
short distance can reconnect you to your body,
break cycles of repetitive thought, regulate
your breathing, energise you, open up your
immediate view of life and help you to bring
your mind back into focus, harmonising body
and brain as you walk. Be mindful of your body,

36
 notice the rhythm of your steps, the contact
that your feet make with the ground, and your
posture. Engage your abdominal muscles, relax
your shoulders, power up your legs and walk
briskly. Lift your gaze and deepen your breath.
Five minutes mindful grace in a busy day.

37
38
“In every walk with nature
one receives far more
than they seek.”
John Muir, Scottish-American
naturalist, activist and author

39
 “The feeling that any task is
a nuisance will soon disappear
if it is done in mindfulness.”
Thich Nhat Hanh

40
 Household chores
No one likes housework and often chores have to
be crammed in between other tasks. Given there’s
not much choice about cleaning the bath or doing
the laundry, turn these tasks into a moment of
contemplation, rather than irritation. Notice the
sensory pleasure of smoothing the fabric of just
washed sheets and enjoy the anticipation of a newly
made bed. Appreciate the sparkle of freshly washed
glassware or the order of folded towels. These
small meditations can refresh our thoughts.

41
42
 Cooking
This is something in which pleasure really can
be taken: in preparation, presentation and
anticipation. Taking time to follow a recipe, chop
and peel, can become a restorative process
leading to something pleasurable and shared,
rather than a tedious task to be endured.

43
44
 Before you sleep
Allow yourself time to prepare for sleep. Turn
off electronic devices. Do one thing – bathe,
read, listen to music – in preparation. Do it with
your full attention. Pause. Practise gratitude and
take a moment to note the good things in
your day, then trust the rest to tomorrow.

45
 “Mindfulness brings us
home to the present.”
Thich Nhat Hanh

46
47
48
 About the author
HARRIET GRIFFEY
Harriet is a journalist, writer and author of I Want to
Be Happy]>ÃÜi>ÃwÛiÌiÀL ÃÌÃÃiÀiÃ
­«ÕLÃi`LÞ>À`iÀ>Ì®°-iÀ}>ÞÌÀ>i`>Ã>
ÕÀÃi>`ÜÜÀÌiÃ>`LÀ>`V>ÃÌÃi>Ì Ài>Ìi`
ÃÃÕiÃ]VÕ`}iÀÀi}Õ>ÀÜiLi}VÕvÀ
In the Moment°>ÀÀiÌÛiÃ`ÜÌiÀv>Þ°

49
“If you want to conquer the
anxiety of life, live in the
moment, live in the breath.”
Amit Ray, Indian author and teacher of
meditation, yoga, peace and compassion