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CUEVAS SAILLE JONATHAN

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REPORTE DE LECTURA: THE ART OF LOVING, ERICH


FROMM

TIJUANA, B.C 28 DE ENERO DEL 2019.

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The Art of Loving, Erich Fromm

Right at the beginning of the book, Fromm speaks on the way society views love,
and how we feel we can attract love into our life. Most of us believe that in order to
find love we must make ourselves more attractive to the opposite sex, which is
true, but this intention is often misplaced, humans generally try to make
themselves more attractive in a superficial way. If male, he will attempt to make
himself rich, have more material possessions, be a successful person; now this is
not to say that looking for success in life is wrong, but this is not the way we should
be looking to attract love into our lives. And if female, she will mostly try to better
he physical appearance, to have a better face or body, there is nothing wrong with
worrying about ones looks either, but this is a misplaced attempt to draw love.

If one wishes to truly attract love, then one must work on oneself and attempt to
show more of the same, to show love will attract love.

Fromm also speaks on how most of humanity sees love as a way of gaining
something, a way of having someone else give you something you cannot give
yourself. But love is not about receiving or having something to gain from at
someone else´s expense, love is about giving, and not giving in the sense of losing
something or having to sacrifice something in exchange for something else, it is
about giving in a way that you share yourself with someone else, giving in a
selfless way, expecting nothing in return.

In the following chapter, Fromm reflects on how most of us have a basic fear on
being alone, we are always looking for a way to escape our loneliness, that is why
most items in popular culture, relate or talk about love in a way, either a love story
that goes wrong, or a love story that has a happy ending, but in a sense we are
always looking to fill that void, we are always looking to find ways to not feel alone.

This is why we look for relationships, or why we look to join groups, to feel part of
something bigger than ourselves, to feel like we belong. This is true with people in
politic parties, they identify themselves with republican or democratic parties, or
people who join religious groups.