Running head: MY MENTOR PHILOSOPHY 1

My Mentor Philosophy

Melanie Bengtson

Minnesota State University Mankato

MY MENTOR PHILOSOPHY 2

My Mentor Philosophy

Mentoring is an activity that is unique and personal based on each and every relationship.

Every mentor comes from a different upbringing that includes different experiences and

teachings and developing different strengths, weaknesses, morals, and values. Basically, every

mentor perceives life differently and has a different understanding of knowledge. This diversity

is why it is important to develop a personal mentor philosophy that will be able to maximize the

productivity of the relationship based on the individuals within the relationship. After analyzing

various readings throughout the semester, I have been able to define what I believe that

knowledge is, and analyze the role of knowledge in a mentoring relationship in an effort to create

my own personal mentor philosophy.

Knowledge is a crucial aspect of mentoring. One must be able to critically analyze and

define what knowledge is before being able to declare what they know. One is not able to

directly and thoroughly teach others what they do not know and understand themselves. I use the

word ‘directly’ because a lack of knowledge in a certain subject may teach an unplanned or

unintentional lesson, but not necessarily the concept itself. With that being said, my personal

definition of knowledge is “A belief and justification that a true statement is true, while also

being able to provide evidence and explanation for that truth from experiences”. To be able to

directly teach someone something, one must be able to justify the truth with evidence, and

evidence comes from experience.

My perception of knowledge is very similar to John Dewey’s perception of knowledge in

the sense that we both agree on an emphasis on experience. We as humans learn from our

experiences, and we use these experiences to develop our own perception of life. These

perceptions help to shape our relationships with other living people both near and far. For
MY MENTOR PHILOSOPHY 3

example, you might have a more positive relationship and experience with someone who

perceives an idea the same way that you do. This is not to say that one cannot have a positive

relationship with someone who disagrees with a certain belief; it all depends on your unique

experiences and perceptions. Building relationships with others is important because not one

person in this world lives and dies completely alone (Dewey, 1938/1965). We all learn from each

other and we gain knowledge from our perceptions of these relationships we build every day. As

Dewey wrote in Experience and Thinking, “the measure of the value of an experience lies in the

perception of relationships or continuities to which it leads up” (Dewey, 1938/1965). Dewey has

helped me in discovering the value of experiences in regards to knowledge which has then

helped me to overall become more self-aware of what I am learning on a daily basis, how I am

learning these things, how this knowledge has potentially altered my perceptions, and how I can

share this knowledge with others. If I am aware of this process of obtaining and sharing this

knowledge through valuable experiences, then I can mentor a mentee in discovering their own

sense of knowledge and analyzing their experiences throughout life.

Not only is general knowledge important in a mentoring relationship, being emotionally

intelligent is also crucial to being a successful mentor. According to Emotionally Intelligent

Leadership for Students, being emotionally intelligent involves a consciousness of self, a

consciousness of others, and a consciousness of context (Shankman, Allen, and Miguel, 2015).

Basically, being conscious of the world around us is an important skill that is necessary to be

able to successfully teach others. It helps us to understand our own strengths and weaknesses and

how that might shape the way we approach mentorship. While developing my personal mentor

philosophy, I have been able to analyze how being emotionally intelligent will impact a

mentorship, more specifically my own beliefs and values regarding mentorship. I now have a
MY MENTOR PHILOSOPHY 4

deeper understanding of how important it is to be able to be aware of emotions, label those

emotions, and be able to know how to use those emotions to incite progress within a mentoring

relationship. If I am able to recognize my own emotions and understand how they can potentially

alter my actions, then I am able to analyze how I can focus the energy of my emotions into the

success of my mentee. I am now more aware that I am personally more effective at analyzing

different perspectives and displaying empathy and I am not as effective at being flexible and

facilitating change (Shankman, Allen, and Miguel, 2015). Knowing these aspects about myself

helps me to find the best approach to solving a conflict in a mentoring role.

Plato’s approach to mentorship is more about the process of obtaining information, and

less about the knowledge that is shared or obtained, which I also think is an important aspect of

mentoring. He periodically refers to “midwifery” and how that relates to being a successful

mentor. In 150c of Theaetetus, Socrates explains “For one thing which I have in common with

the ordinary midwives is that I myself am barren of wisdom.” And then he proceeds to explain

that he is the one asking the questions about the concept, and intentionally not providing any

answers. He accomplishes his goal of developing knowledgeable people by letting them discover

the knowledge within themselves. It is a very clever way of approaching mentorship, how he

uses his lack of knowledge to question his peers and challenge them to explore their knowledge.

I agree that it is important to be able to be aware of moments when you are barren of knowledge

in an effort to prevent false teachings. It is possible to mend false teachings when accidents

happen, but a mentor should be honest and not intentionally make false teachings seem true.

Socrates does not just want to provide an easy answer, he focuses on the process of

allowing the student to experiences triumphs and failures in order to truly learn. Allowing the

mentee to discover their knowledge also opens up an opportunity for the mentee to teach the
MY MENTOR PHILOSOPHY 5

mentor, which I mention because I believe that a mentoring relationship is not only supposed to

benefit the mentee, but the mentor as well. For example, I let my mentee from the YMCA make

her own decisions and I provide additional guidance when needed. I have spent a lot of time with

her these past few months and I know her very well, but at the end of the day she is the one who

makes any final decisions about her life. My resources become beneficial when I am able to

provide questions and ideas that help her to consider different perspectives before making a

decision. As I observe her go through the process of analyzing different situations and outcomes,

she teaches me about perspectives that I may have not considered on my own which not only

helps her to learn and grow, but it helps me as well.

Effective communication skills play such an important role in a mentoring relationship. A

mentee is unable to learn to the fullest extent if there is no communication. This involves

speaking, asking questions, and listening. All of the factors involved in communication are so

important to not only develop a relationship, but to share knowledge with each other. A mentor

must also be open and clear about admitting a lack of knowledge when appropriate.

Communicating honesty is just as important as communicating knowledge. Currently being a

mentor through the YMCA, I have been able to practice effective communication skills because

the program does not give me any specific lessons they advise that I mentor my youth about. We

get to choose as we go, depending on what we feel is necessary based on the current situation. It

is crucial that I effectively communicate with my mentee to be able to understand what struggles

she may be encountering and where she might expect me to be able to provide assistance. We

listen to each other, ask questions, and provide feedback and we have developed a successful

relationship.
MY MENTOR PHILOSOPHY 6

A mentor has many different roles depending on the situation. A mentor is a friend, a

teacher, a motivator, a leader, as well as many other things. Overall, a mentor is there to aid a

mentee in discovering knowledge, either on a specific topic or in general. To accomplish this

goal, a problem must be declared. There must be a desire to learn at some point in the duration of

the relationship for the mentoring to be successful. After this problem has been established, a

plan must be made to resolve the problem. A mentor must be able to be aware of their

surroundings and relationships to analyze the most effective way to utilize the strengths of the

resources to develop a solution. Then action must take place. The plan must be intended to be

executed, but it can definitely change along the way if needed. Then the mentor and the mentee

should reflect on the situation in order to discuss what was and was not successful. This system

sparks necessary experience for both the mentor and the mentee to learn.

Many mentoring relationships come to an end at some point. A mentor cannot be present

and available to help their mentee at all times. I think that it is important to understand this

inevitability and be able to decide on goals to achieve independently. A mentor is able to help

their mentee learn not only new information, but how to use this information every day, even

when the mentor is not physically there for guidance. The final goal of all mentoring

relationships should be to provide the mentee with enough experience, knowledge, and skills to

be able to eventually graduate the relationship and be able to potentially mentor students of their

own. A mentor should build up enough confidence in the mentee for them to be able to

independently achieve their goals. That does not mean that a mentor has to permanently be of

absence in the mentee’s life. Situations can, and probably will happen where even though the

mentee may have gained enough knowledge to make decisions on their own, sometimes

guidance may be appreciated.

MY MENTOR PHILOSOPHY 7

My mentor philosophy will continue to change and develop throughout the rest of my

lifetime. Every single day I am gaining new knowledge and new experiences that alter my

perceptions and values. Each of my mentoring relationships will be completely unique. After

researching, analyzing, and reflecting on different perspectives of knowledge and mentoring, I

am anticipating growing with my current and future mentees in the pursuit to incorporate our

findings and discovering ourselves a little more every day. As a mentor, I strive to utilize what I

know about experience, emotional intelligence, midwifery, and communication to help my

mentee continue to never stop reaching for their fullest potential for the rest of their life.

References

Dewey, J. (1965). Experience and Thinking. In J. J. McDermott (Ed.), The philosophy of John

Dewey (pp. 494-506). Chicago: University of Chicago Press. (Reprinted from Democracy

and Education, pp. 139-51, by J. Dewey, 1938, New York: Macmillan Co.)

Dewey, J. (1965). The Need of a Theory of Experience. In J. J. McDermott (Ed.), The philosophy

of John Dewey (pp. 494-506). Chicago: University of Chicago Press. (Reprinted from

Experience and Education, pp. 12-22 , by J. Dewey, 1938, New York: Macmillan Co.)

Plato, and Williams, B. (1992). Theaetetus. Indianapolis, Indiana: Hackett Publishing Company,

Inc.

Shankman, M. L., Allen, S. J., & Miguel, R. (2015). Emotionally Intelligent Leadership. San

Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass A Wiley Brand.