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NORTH JERSEY/ROCKLAND VOL. LXXXVIII NO. 37 $1.00 2019

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Unchained at Last
Fraidy Reiss wins Berrie award
for her advocacy against
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2 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019
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Page 3
Lebanese nun’s monkey
infiltrates Israel
l The border crossing was more
mischievous than military.
Shortly after a French nun
named Beatrice Maugerin re-
ported that her monkey had gone
missing from her “Ship of Peace”
farm in southern Lebanon, Israelis
in northern Israel reported mul-
tiple monkey sightings.
The farm reportedly is intend-
ed to be a safe place for Muslims, At home in Lebanon.
Jews, and Christians. There are
no indications that it was not a welcoming place for
African primates as well.
Nonetheless, the monkey, who has not been named,
has been spotted in a number of Israeli communities, several miles from the Israeli border.
Lebanese monkey visits Israeli farm. As of this writing, the monkey has yet to be captured. Larry Yudelson

Would Jew-moji be good for the Jews? CONTENTS

l Last week we told you about
an initiative to add the image
of a Torah scroll to the library
of tiny images people put in
text messages.
Now there’s word of a new
initiative. The Conference of
European Rabbis has asked
the Unicode Consortium for
new emojis that show men in
kippahs and women in head
coverings.
In addition to its main function
— developing a universal character
encoding scheme allowing people
around the world to use computers
in any language — the nonprofit
consortium also selects the emoji
icons used by the world’s smart-
phones based on submissions from
individuals and organizations who
present their case with evidence
for why each one is essential.
“There are emojis of women in
the hijab and Arab clerics, and the
Jews have been forgotten,” the
Conference of European Rabbis
wrote. “The need for equality and
non-discrimination begins with the
small things, which in this case may
seem minor but have enormous
significance and long-term effects.
The WhatsApp application is used
daily by millions of citizens
around the world, especially
the young.”
Making emojis more inclu-
sive by including some that
look like traditional Jews is a
way to make the world more
inclusive, the letter said.
“If it is legitimate to present
a family consisting of two men
or two women, and to present
the traditional attire of the Islamic
religion, we believe that there is
room for presenting Jewish symbols
as well,” it also said. “The Jewish
religion should not be left behind;
it should be brought to the center
of public discourse and made equal
among the other religions.”
Jews constitute about 0.2 per-
cent of the global population.
Marcy Oster/JTA
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THE FRAZZLED HOUSEWIFE��������������36
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Israelis brew beer from ancient yeast
l Israeli scientists isolated yeast from ancient pottery
used to brew beer and used it to create the same liba-
tion that presumably the Egyptian pharaoh, Iron Age
rulers, and ancient Jewish leaders all drank.
The discovery of the yeast and re-creation of the
ancient beer was announced last week by researchers
from the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, the Israel
Antiquities Authority, Tel Aviv University, and Bar-Ilan
University.
The jars from which the yeast was recovered date
back to the reign of the Pharaoh Narmer, circa 3000
BCE, to the Aramean King Hazael, around 800 BCE,
and the Prophet Nehemiah, about 400 BCE.
The researchers cleaned and sequenced the full
genome of each yeast specimen and discovered that
they were similar to those used in traditional African
brews — and to modern beer yeast.
An Israeli beer expert, Itai Gutman, helped the sci-
purposes and subject to JEWISH STANDARD’s unrestricted
right to edit and to comment editorially. Nothing may be
reprinted in whole or in part without written permission from
the publisher. © 2019
entists make the beer. The brew was sampled by certi-
fied tasters from the International Beer Judge Certifi- Candlelighting:
cation Program. Friday, May 31, 8:03 p.m.
The testers determined the brew was high quality
and safe for consumption. One brew was said to be Shabbat ends:
similar in color, aroma, and flavor to one made from a Saturday, June 1, 9:11 p.m.
well-known English ale yeast.
“This ancient yeast allowed us to create beer that
On the cover: Fraidy Reiss speaks at
lets us know what ancient Philistine and Egyptian
a chain-in demonstrate in Westfield,
beer tasted like,” Ronen Hazan, a microbiologist from
urging state legislators to override
Hebrew University and one of the lead researchers in
Governor Chris Christie’s veto of a
the project, said. “By the way, the beer isn’t bad. Aside
law forbidding child marriages. (He
from the gimmick of drinking beer from the time of
said that it could interfere with reli-
King Pharaoh, this research is extremely important to
gious freedom.) Later, Governor Phil
the field of experimental archaeology — a field that
Murphy signed the bill into law, mak-
seeks to reconstruct the past. Our research offers new
ing New Jersey the second state to
tools to examine ancient methods, and enables us to
approve that ban.
taste the flavors of the past.” Marcy Oster/JTA
Courtesy Unchained At Last

Jewish Standard may 31, 2019 3


Noshes
REBOOT DEPARTMENT:
‘Deadwood’ returns
as does Dr. Ruth
The Western
series “Dead-
wood,” set in the 1870s
in the famous South
Dakota town, ran on
HBO for three years —
from 2004 to 2006
— and got great
reviews before it was
suddenly canceled. (It
also got just so/so
ratings and was
expensive to produce.)
Now, though, since so
many TV shows have
been rebooted
successfully, a new
two-hour HBO “Dead-
wood” movie will wind
up many unresolved
plot lines. It will
premiere on May 31.
Advance reviews are
good, and all the
still-living stars from
the original are in it.
This includes
ROBIN WEIGERT, 49,
as Calamity Jane (who
really lived); Timothy
Olyphant as (real)
lawman Seth Bullock;
and John Hawkes as
SOL STAR (1840-1917),
the real Deadwood
Jewish merchant who
was Bullock’s
best friend.
“Deadwood” was cre-
ated by DAVID MILCH,
74; sadly, this movie
marks the end of his
creative life. In 2015,
Milch was diagnosed
with Alzheimer’s;
Want to read more noshes? Visit facebook.com/jewishstandard
Englewood | Harriman
4 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019
there’s a great article
in the May 27 issue of
the New Yorker (it’s
available online) about
how he is coping with
the disease. It seems
that his family is his
anchor. His wife, RITA
STERN MILCH, has
stood by him through
his drug addiction
and an incredibly bad
gambling addiction
that wiped them out
financially. His daugh-
ter, OLIVIA MILCH,
24, who co-wrote the
recent movie “Ocean’s
8,” helped her father
with the “Deadwood”
movie script.
“Ask Dr. Ruth,” a
documentary about
the famous sex and
relationship counselor,
will premiere on Hulu
on June 1. Dr. RUTH
WESTHEIMER, 90,
talks candidly about
her whole life, including
surviving the Holocaust
and fighting and get-
ting wounded in Israel’s
War of Independence.
The film got very
good reviews when it
played many recent
film festivals, including
Sundance. It is full of
interesting details, like
her original name, Karo-
la Ruth Siegel, and her
height (4’7’’). But the
most interesting thing,
to me, is how she just
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“The comparison lands somewhere
between absolutely offensive & flat
out idiotic.”
— ADL CEO Jonathan Greenblatt, referring to the comparison
between the demonization of Jews in Nazi Germany and the
demonization of carbon dioxide made by William Happer,
a Trump appointee to the National Security Council.
of the continent of
Westeros. The “game”
in GOT centered on
who would rule the
kingdom, but thou-
sands of years before
that game, the Children
were being slaughtered
by Westeros’s first hu-
man invaders. To stave
off their genocide, they
took a human being
Robin Weigert David Milch and magically turned
him into the Night
King, a creature who
could revive the dead
and order them to kill
the living. The Night
King is much like the
mythical figure of the
Golem in many Jew-
ish tales. The Golem
was a super-powerful
creature, magically
created by a rabbi, who
was meant to protect
Olivia Milch Dr. Ruth Westheimer the Jewish communi-
ty. But in many story
shines with an infec- these are amazing versions he becomes
tious joy of life. insights, but I think uncontrollable. The
they’re interesting and Children, likewise, could
Is anything I want to relay them not ultimately control
in “Game of while the series is still the Night King, and
Thrones” Jewish? fresh in the minds of its he and his minions
A friend just multitudes of fans. eventually turned on
asked me if there I first thought about everyone, Children and
were characters or the creation of the humans alike.
themes in “Games of Night King and his army I also came to realize
Thrones” that a of zombie-like wights. that if there were a
reasonable person It’s gradually revealed Jewish character in the
could take to be that the Night King was series it was Tyrion, a
Jewish. I thought created by the “Chil- very smart and fun-
about this and came dren of the Forest,” ny man who should
up with two answers. I who were the original have been the ultimate
don’t maintain that non-human inhabitants high-station insider by
California-based Nate Bloom can be reached at
Middleoftheroad1@aol.com
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virtue of his birth into a
powerful noble family.
But he never could truly
be such an insider be-
cause he was a dwarf.
This “between two
worlds” existence has
been, and is, a situation
that prominent Jews in
the diaspora have faced
for centuries.
For example, even
the very wealthy and
ennobled British Roth-
schilds, who have lived
the model life of the
British aristocracy (like
castles full of the finest
antique furnishings),
are not quite viewed
as “one of us” by the
rest of the non-Jewish
aristocracy. But being
an insider/outsider has
its pluses. For example,
a huge number of co-
medians are American
Jews or Canadians of
any background. Both
groups know Ameri-
can culture, but they
are somewhat apart
psychically from most
Americans. They often
look at the culture in
a removed way and
that removal often
fosters a comedic take
that would not oc-
cur to most heartland
Americans. (Now you
know why Tyrion was
funny, and possibly
why he was smart and
empathetic.) –N.B.
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JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019 5
5/24/19 12:22 PM
Local
Learning to be leaders
Orthodox Union convenes Women’s Initiative
to further careers, networking, and self-awareness
ABIGAIL KLEIN LEICHMAN
E
sti Coates of Teaneck was not
sure what to expect at the
inaugural Leadership Summit
sponsored by the Orthodox
Union Women’s Initiative on May 20-21 at
the Hilton Woodcliff Lake.
The ad she had seen for the lay lead-
ership conference promised a program
“designed to encourage and develop
women serving as lay leaders within their
communities.”
This intrigued Ms. Coates, who is
involved in volunteer endeavors and is
the program administrator of a new part-
nership that allows young ultra-Orthodox
women from the Sara Schenirer Seminary
in Brooklyn to earn a master’s degree
from Yeshiva University’s Wurzweiler
School of Social Work.
“I really wanted to learn how to be a
better leader, how to have a better bal-
ance, and be part of a really strong net-
work of women I could call upon to
become the best me I can be,” Ms. Coates,
the mother of eight, said.
Ms. Coates was one of nine Bergen
County women accepted to the summit;
the process required an application and
a recommendation from a communal
leader or mentor.
6 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019
The participants heard lectures and
engaged in discussions with about 90
other female lay leaders from 56 commu-
nities around the United States, Canada,
Israel, the United Kingdom, and South
Africa.
“The goals of the program were to nur-
ture lay leadership, enhance leadership
skills, and create a collaborative space,”
said Dr. Adina Shmidman, founding direc-
tor of the OU Women’s Initiative.
Sessions focused on leadership strat-
egy and communication, public speaking,
engaging and retaining volunteers, creat-
ing compelling programming, effectively
using social media, honing and growing
your personal leadership strengths and
work-life balance, community spiritual
growth, and board and donor relations.
Ms. Coates reported that the summit
far exceeded her expectations.
“I’ve never been in a space with so
many accomplished, diverse, powerful
women,” she said. “It was really outstand-
ing. It helped me to step out of my own
thinking and see things from a different
perspective.”
From a keynote session led by George
Washington University associate pro-
fessor Erica Brown — who attended the
Frisch School in Paramus and has written
books including “Take Your Soul to Work:
All New Jersey participants in the OU
Women’s Initiative Leadership Summit in
Woodcliff Lake sit together. ZUSH PHOTOGRAPHY
365 Meditations on Every Day Leader- a big difference. “One person with the
ship” (Simon and Schuster, December right drive, energy, skill, and ambition
2015) — Ms. Coates took away a new deter- can singlehandedly inspire a community,
mination “to make sure I nurture myself transform a shul, propel a yeshiva to new
and don’t just run, run, run.” heights, and drive organizational change
“Erica Brown explained that when you through the formulation of strategy and
say ‘yes’ to something you’re really saying mission,” he said.
‘no’ to something else,” Ms. Coates said.
“That was powerful for me to understand.
I realized that I have to give of my time
and talents to places where I can really
make a difference because I can’t say yes
to everything — although I’d like to.”
I really wanted
Among the other presenters at the sum- to learn how
mit were several Bergen County residents:
Rachel Cyrulnik, founder of RAISE Non-
to be a better
profit Advisors; writer-director-producer leader, how to
Allison Josephs, the founder and director
of JewintheCity.com; Suzy Schwartz, an
have a better
assistant vice president at Yeshiva Uni- balance, and be
versity; licensed clinical social worker Dr.
Linda Goldmintz; and Tamar Snyder, an
part of a really
award-winning journalist and marketing strong network
and communications director at the Jew-
ish Communal Fund.
of women.
The OU’s executive vice president,
Allen Fagin, noted that many of the pro-
fessional women at the summit also vol- Deena Jarashow of Fair Lawn, volun-
unteer in their local synagogue, school, tary director of the Leah Sokoloff Nursery
mikvah, hospital, chevra kadisha (burial School of Congregation Shomrei Torah
society), or other groups and institutions. for the last 20 years, says she discovered
He emphasized that one person can make at the summit that many issues facing her
 Local

shul community are mirrored every-
where else.
For example, one discussion touched
on how to keep older movers and shak-
ers engaged in synagogue leadership
roles even as they pass the baton to
younger members, who may be chart-
ing a different direction for the future.
“It struck me that a lot of these women
were there because they cared about the
perpetuation of their communities,” Ms.
Jarashow says. “It was amazing to see
the cohesiveness and the power of these
women. I felt such vibrancy and a feeling
of togetherness.”
She also is active in Shomrei Torah’s
Women’s Institute of Learning and Lead-
ership —- which received a competitive
Women’s Initiative Challenge Grant from
the Orthodox Union last year — and at
Yavneh Academy in Paramus and the
Torah Academy of Bergen County in
Teaneck, from which her younger son
now is graduating.
Her main take-home message, from
Erica Brown’s talk, is that Orthodox syn-
agogues have to focus more effort on
being friendly and open to newcomers.
“Our first job should be to make sure
Deena Jarashow of Fair Lawn and Esti Coates of Teaneck at the OU Women’s
Initiative Leadership Summit in Woodcliff Lake.
everyone is greeted when they come
into shul,” Ms. Jarashow said.
To ensure that the networking
ZUSH PHOTOGRAPHY
accomplished at the summit can con-
tinue and grow, the OU Women’s Ini-
tiative created a Facebook page, “OU
Women Lead,” and a WhatsApp group
for the participants to keep the conver-
sation going.
The other women from Bergen
County at the summit were Rachel Krich
of Fair Lawn and Becky Katz, Esther
Friedman, Miriam Gedwiser, Miriam
Greenspan, Adeena Mayerfeld, and
Naomi Rotblat, all from Teaneck.
OU President Moishe Bane was
appreciative to “the lay activists here
today, who, along with Jewish women
throughout history, have committed
countless hours of their precious time
and tremendous energy to ensure the
blossoming of Torah Judaism in Amer-
ica and around the globe, and who
have been pivotal to the success and
impact of our most valued institutions
and programs.”
The OU Women’s Initiative develops
professional and lay leadership train-
ing for women in the Orthodox Jewish
community and works with Orthodox
communities nationwide to identify
and address spiritual, educational and
communal needs of women at all ages
and phases. For more information, go to
https://www.ou.org/women/.

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Local

Pursuing justice from the bench

Emanuel’s tikkun layl Shavuot looks at 8 Jewish Supreme Court members
JOANNE PALMER

W
hen most American Jews think of Shavuot
(and to be realistic, outside of the Ortho-
dox and observant Conservative commu-
nities, most American Jews don’t), we
think of all-night study, the tikkun layl Shavuot, that tends
more and more toward the spiritual as the more easily
fatigued or bored go home and the night gets darker and
then eventually the dawn shows up, all pink and gold.
We think of the Israelites gathered at the foot of Mount
Sinai, hearing the lightning and seeing the thunder.
We think of cheesecake. We are fueled by cheesecake.
We are driven forward by visions of cheesecake.
But less frequently we think not only of the law that
was delivered at Mount Sinai than of the long tradition
of law that has followed.
And probably we don’t think very often of Ameri-
can law, of the interplay of Jewish and American his-
tory that has produced many great American Jewish
legal minds. We probably don’t often spend tikkun layl
Shavuot talking about the Supreme Court. But Rabbi
Joseph Prouser of Temple Emanuel of North Jersey,
who is both a Conservative rabbi and a lifelong student
of American history, has made that connection.
He has asked eight of his congregants — some of them
lawyers, some academics, all interested and interesting
— to prepare a short talk on each of the eight Jewish
Supreme Court justices, from Louis Brandeis to Elena
Kagan. (See box.)
“It is remarkable that on a Supreme Court with nine jus-
tices, three of them are Jewish,” Rabbi Prouser said. “That’s
something that the founding fathers never foresaw, but that
reflects their general approach to the country’s diversity.”
And there’s another reason to focus on the Supreme
Court right now. “The country’s attention is increasingly
focused on the court,” he said. “People are looking at it
with hope for balance and reason and a sense of devotion
to the vison of democracy that it is charged to uphold.”
He’ll intersperse teaching talmudic texts about the San-
hedrin, the rabbinic court, between discussions of the
Supreme Court justices, Rabbi Prouser said. “I’ll look at
comparisons between the two legal systems — how do they
fill open seats? What’s the significance of a divided system?
“I will be teaching about death penalty cases. When
there was a death penalty case, a unanimous vote for con-
viction would be written as an acquittal,” he said. “That
meant that something would be wrong. You could not
have that. Something must have been flawed if everyone
could agree that someone needed to die.”
Who: Rabbi Joseph Prouser
What: Will present a tikkun layl Shavuot focusing
on the eight Jewish Supreme Court Justices
When: On Saturday, June 8, at 7 p.m.
Where: At Temple Emanuel of North Jersey,
558 High Mountain Road, Franklin Lakes
How much: Free and open to the community
And also: A dairy buffet will be open throughout
the program.
For more information: Call (201) 560-0200
or to go www.tenjfl.org
8 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019
President Lyndon Johnson, left, confers with Abe Fortas, whom he nominated to the Supreme Court
and depended upon as an adviser.
Here are a few stories about two of “He once said in his private corre-
the eight justices the panel will look at. spondence that he was a heathen, but
Mike Fisch of Wayne, a chemist by he actually got his first elected office
day, will talk about the second Jew- because they” — the people charged
ish justice, Benjamin Cardozo, on the with selecting a nominee — “wanted a
night of Shavuot. Jew. The first guy they recommended
Cardozo was born into the Sephar- was into Reform Judaism and Ethical
dic aristocracy in New York in 1870, Mr. Culture, and they said no. They said
Fisch said; his father, Albert Cardozo, they needed ‘a real Jew.’’’
was a New York State Supreme Court Cardozo did not go to school until
judge, who ran for his office backed by he entered Columbia College at 15;
Tammany Hall and one of its founders, like others of his social class, he was
Fernando Wood. Those were hugely tutored at home. His tutor for Colum-
powerful forces in New York City; to be bia’s entrance exams was the author
backed by them was a major big deal. Horatio Alger. He went to law school
He had a meteoric career until he was Justice Benjamin Cardozo at Columbia; it was a two-year pro-
caught up in a scandal; the day before gram when he entered, but another
the New York State Assembly was to come out with a report year was added during his time as a student there. In
naming him and accusing him of corruption, he resigned. high-minded protest (or perhaps in high dudgeon), he
His son was 2 years old; when Benjamin was 15, his father left after two years (and after having earned a master’s
died. “I don’t know, but I suspect that he went into law to degree in philosophy at the same time). When he turned
clear the family name,” Mr. Fisch said. 21, and thus was eligible to take the bar exam, he took it
His family on his mother’s side was even more illus- and passed it. “He was incredible,” Mr. Fisch said.
trious. His mother, amazingly named Rebecca Washing- He remained active in Shearith Israel, although he
ton Nathan Cardozo, was a Nathan, and that family was continued his lack of observance. “When he was 25, he
entwined with the Seixases. His uncle was a founder of argued in the shul against mixed seating, on the grounds
the New York Stock Exchange, and “his great grandfather, that it violated the shul’s constitution,” Mr. Fisch said. “It
his grandfather, and two of his uncles were presidents of was voted down by a large margin, I think something like
Shearith Israel,” also known as the Spanish Portuguese 75 to 7.” He also hired many Jewish law clerks, he added.
Synagogue. That shul now has a grand, lovely building Cardozo’s grandfather’s brother-in-law, Gershon
on Manhattan’s Central Park West, but when it began, in Seixas, was “the first Jewish trustee of Columbia College,”
1654, it was downtown. It is the oldest congregation in the Mr. Fisch said. “He finished his term in 1814. And Colum-
country, and today it flourishes. “He came from a very bia didn’t have another Jewish trustee again until Car-
prominent family,” Mr. Fisch understated. dozo, in 1928.” There’s a lot of Jewish history in his story.
Like many of the men in his family, Cardozo was a life- Cardozo sat in the Supreme Court seat previously held
long bachelor. “His mother was one of 15 children, and by Oliver Wendell Holmes, “who was of course a giant,
two thirds of her brothers never married,” Mr. Fisch said. but it was said that in Cardozo they had found a proper
“They were focused on careers.” He lived with his sister, successor,” Mr. Fisch said. His tenure on the court was
“and he was the only one of the Jewish Supreme Court short — he was confirmed in 1932, and his position was
Justices who had a kosher home as an adult. He was not ended by his death, at 68, in 1938. Still, “he is considered
observant, but he was very culturally attached. generally as one of the top 10 Supreme Court Justices.”

Peter Safirstein of Ridgewood is an
attorney; “I’m a litigator, so the topics
of Supreme Court jurisprudence, of
the justices of the Supreme Court, and
of the Jewish justices in particular are
really interesting to me.”
He’s now in private practice, but
he’s worked for the SEC and as a fed-
eral prosecutor under President Ron-
ald Reagan, with the Southern District
of New York and Florida’s Southern Dis-
trict as well.
He’ll be talking about Abe Fortas. “I
think Fortas is fascinating,” he said; for
one thing, “He is the answer to an abso-
lutely fantastic trivia question, which
is ‘Has any Jewish person ever been
nominated to be the chief justice of the
United States?’ And the answer is yes.
It’s Abe Fortas.”
Of course there haven’t been any
actual as opposed to nominated chief
justices; the nomination was the start of
the process that ended in his resignation.
Abe Fortas, born in 1910, did not
take the typical path to the Supreme
Court. Although it was different for
earlier justices, by Fortas’s time it was
clear that the way to the Supreme
Court was through the appellate
court, or perhaps a law school. “For-
tas came right out of private practice,”
Mr. Safirstein said. “His real claims to
fame were that he was a brilliant law-
yer, and a very close if not the closest
adviser to President Johnson.” (Lyn-
don Baines Johnson, that is.)
“He was not interested in becoming a
Supreme Court justice.
“Johnson had offered him a govern-
ment job when Kennedy was assassi-
nated. Kennedy’s attorney general was
his brother, Bobby Kennedy, and when
Johnson became president, Kennedy
resigned to run for the Senate.
“Fortas would have been the first
Jewish attorney general. But he was
doing very well at his law firm, and
neither he nor his wife, who also was a
partner in the firm — she was either the
first or almost the first woman to make
partner — wanted his salary cut.”
Fortas and his wife, Carolyn Agger,
who was not Jewish, met at Yale, where
they both went to law school. They did
not have children. “She was furious at
Johnson,” Mr. Safirstein said. The John-
sons and the Fortases had been friends,
and eventually they became friends
again, “but for a while she refused to
talk to him.”
Fortas’s work before he became a jus-
tice — some of it pro bono — is legendary.
Chief Justice Earl Warren appointed For-
tas, then in private practice, to defend
Clarence Gideon before the Supreme
Court as he fought for and won the right
to legal representation. The journalist
Anthony Lewis turned the story into the
book and movie “Gideon’s Trumpet”;
Local
Henry Fonda played Gideon and Jose
Ferrer was Abe Fortas.
Fortas “was raised Orthodox in Ten-
Don't Miss Out!
nessee, but when he grew older, he
became unobservant,” Mr. Safirstein
said. “He did not go to synagogue. But I
think that his abiding sense of social jus-
tice, of his advocacy for social causes, of
the rights of defendants, was because he
was Jewish.” It wasn’t accidental that he
was appointed to defend Gideon. Those
were the kinds of pro bono cases he was
asked to take on. “Fortas is known for
his jurisprudence, but less for his work
on the Supreme Court than for arguing
before it,” Mr. Safirstein added.
After he was confirmed as a justice,
“Fortas takes the Jewish seat from Arthur
Goldberg, and he goes on the Supreme
Court, which is now the famous War- Or Join
ren court, and he supports Warren and Our Hike
liberal jurisprudence and the rights of
criminal defendants,” he said.
“And then politics kicks in. It’s 1968,
and Chief Justice Earl Warren tells John- Use Promo Code JSTAND for
son that he is retiring, and Johnson 30% off Registration Fees
nominates Abe Fortas to succeed him. www.RidetoFightHunger.com
But politics have changed dramatically.
It is a different era.” Johnson is hobbled
by the disaster in Vietnam and there-
fore vulnerable, and “Republicans
think that Nixon will win,” so, for the
first time, they have a Senate hearing
before confirming the nominee, and the
Endless Possibilities
hearing brings out the fact that Fortas
continued to advise Johnson. That was
not acceptable.
Fortas withdrew his candidacy,
but soon questions about his finances
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ensnared him. He resigned in 1969, went
back to private practice, and died in 1982.
Fortas’s resignation “ended some-
thing like 53 years of the Jewish seat,”
Mr. Safirstein said. “Nixon did not HOME EQUITY LINE OF CREDIT
appoint a Jewish person. The next Jew-
ish person was appointed by Clinton —
Ruth Bader Ginsburg.”
That’s just two of the eight Jewish jus-
tices. The panel will discuss all of them.
Besides Abe Fortas, and Benjamin Car-
dozo, the others are Louis Brandeis,
Arthur Golderg, Ruth Bader Ginsburg,
Elena Kagan, Felix Frankfurter, and Ste-
phen Breyer.
Rabbi Prouser underscores the con-
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JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019 9
 JS-10*

Local

Helping young burn victims move on

Teaneck attorney creates global healing camps and laser centers
Lois Goldrich

E
arly in his career, Teaneck
attorney Sam Davis rep-
resented several seriously
burned children. “We did
fantastically well for them in court,” he
said, but when he ran across their fami-
lies years later, “it was never good news.
It was always the same story. The kids
remained isolated, depressed, almost
frozen in time.” Rather than moving on
with their lives, “it’s as if a pause button
on their development was hit.
“I found it very troubling,” Mr. Davis
said. “Despite all of our high hopes that
with the money put away for treatments
they would now be able to recover and
lead fulfilling lives, and do fun things,”
they didn’t.
The young attorney was so troubled
that he went to meetings of the Amer-
ican Burn Association and

Photos courtesy Sam Davis

began doing research on the
issue. When he learned that
there were 40 burn camps in
the United States, he started
volunteering at one of them
and developed a music pro-
gram, “shipping instruments
and other recreational mate-
rials to the camps.” Sam Davis addresses the Israel Burn Association.
Some 15 years ago, eager
for his former clients to get facility will offer state-of–the-art laser therapy to every
the benefit of such facilities, child in Israel, without regard to his or her ethnicity,
“I took some of the kids to nationality, religion, or ability to pay. Burn Advocates
camp with me,” he said. “The Network is partnering with Sheba on I-PEARLS.
experience was transforma-
tive.” Ultimately, he brought
all of those children to camp.
Indeed, so meaningful are
these camps to Mr. Davis that
his son, Joshua, incorpo-
These kids are going
rated work at a burn camp Sababa campers enjoy activities at the facility founded in 2009 at Kfar through a difficult
into his bar mitzvah project.
Mr. Davis hopes that other
Galim, Israel.
struggle. But upward
b’nai mitzvah students will do the same. the only burn camp in the Middle East,” he said. of 95 percent of our
Also around this time, the director of Camp Susque-
hanna in Millersville, Pennsylvania, asked Mr. Davis if
“Camp is not an international concept. The only
camps that exist in the few countries that offer them
kids have significant
he would be willing to sponsor a pair of Israeli burn are medical camps where surgeries are performed. positive change.
survivors. “That was a fateful sponsorship because I Burn camps like Sababa, Camp Karma in India, and
wound up meeting the head of physical therapy at Camp Samba in Brazil focus on the psychosocial. Mr. Davis said that several years ago, a camper at
Schneiders Children’s Hospital, one of the directors of “These kids are going through a difficult struggle. Camp Sababa told him that she could not get a date
the camp,” he said. “I saw that these kids had a fantas- But upward of 95 percent of our kids have significant because of her scar. Moved by her plea for help,
tic experience and I asked why they didn’t go to camp positive change.” he researched options available to her in Israel. He
in Israel.” It turns out there wasn’t one. Research bears this out. Academic studies have recently had heard a lecture at Massachusetts Gen-
“So I said, let’s organize it. That’s where it started.” shown that burn survivors who participate in burn eral Hospital where the speakers described how they
In 2009, Camp Sababa in Kfar Galim, Israel, was camps experienced decreased isolation, improved were using lasers. And not just any lasers, but Israeli
founded, in cooperation with Schneider’s Children’s self-esteem, and improved social skills. lasers. “I was shocked to learn that lasers were not
Hospital. But that was only the beginning. Today, Mr. Mr. Davis recently addressed the Israel Burn Asso- being used to treat disfiguring scars on children in
Davis is the director of Burn Advocates Network and ciation. Calling his presentation “A Laser Unto the the very country that developed and manufactures
the founding director of burn camps and relief proj- Nations,” he hailed the opening of the Israel Pediatric them,” he said. “I could not understand why Israeli
ects in five countries. Aesthetic and Reconstructive Laser Surgery Center of kids did not have that choice.” He reached out to
“We just finished the 11th session of Camp Sababa, Excellence (I-PEARLS) at Sheba Medical Center. The Sheba, and I-PEARLS was born.
10 Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019

“Sheba has become our mis-
sion partner in making laser care
available to resource-challenged
countries around the world,” he
said. “It’s a great center of tikkun
olam, and it was just named in
Newsweek’s list of 10 best medi-
cal centers in the world.”
Mr. Davis described Kfar Galim
as “a beautiful nature reserve,
200 yards from the Mediterra-
nean,” which allows surfing to
become one of the children’s
activities. Campers have a range
of disabilities, “but one of our
mantras is that every kid should
be able to participate in every
activity.” In surfing, for example,
that might involve a counselor
riding along with a child who has
lost a limb.
The camp has a nurse and a
visiting surgeon program allow-
ing doctors to enjoy the experi- Sababa campers at the Celebrity Chefs party celebrate the I-PEARLS groundbreaking
ence of seeing former patients with Yuliana Ethel, head of OT at Schneiders Childrens Hospital, and Mira Tzur. Sam Davis
enjoying themselves. “They kneels between two campers.
come see the kids whose lives
they saved.”
Mr. Davis and the Burn Advocates Network have
been active in other countries as well.
“Seven years ago, we started a camp in Mumbai”
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Local
Treating children with burns
is an expensive proposition, Mr.
Davis said, and most countries
don’t have access to lasers or
burn specialists who know how
to use them. Still, “this resource
should be considered a necessary
part of scar care. Even kids who
get great burn care have diffi-
cult challenges. Where there are
scarce resources, and the chil-
dren lack access to burn camps
or laser care, their futures can
seem hopeless. Burn camps are
an extraordinary way of letting
these kids experience some time
without being stared at or judged
by their scars. They can also see
role models who survived burns
and have gone on with their
lives.”
Mr. Davis said he was influ-
enced by his mother, Ruth Davis
— who recently turned 100 years
old and was profiled in this paper
— to “give back.
“Mom was active in men-
— Camp Karma is India’s first burn camp, and operates tal health outreach and dad was a healer,” he said.
in cooperation with KEM Hospital — “and four years ago “He was a physician/surgeon who ran army hospitals
we started one in Brazil” — that’s Camp Samba. “Brazil during the Second World War. He practiced medicine
has enormous burn problems,” he added. See burn victims page 20
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Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019 11

Local
‘Surrendering is not an option’
Political analyst Lisa Daftari comes to Paramus
to discuss anti-Semitism, both at home and abroad
Abigail Klein Leichman
A
ward-winning investigative journalist, polit-
ical analyst, and media commentator Lisa
Daftari is returning to her native borough
to be the keynote speaker at Paramus Bat-
Sheva Hadassah’s annual Jean Lipshitz Memorial Meet-
ing on June 5. (See box.)
Ms. Daftari, who lives in Los Angeles but grew up in
Paramus, will speak about “The Rise of Anti-Semitism
Globally and in the U.S.: A Focus on the Media, College
Campuses, and the BDS Movement.”
“As a staunch supporter of Israel and someone who
has advocated for all moderate actors in the Middle
East as well as all peace-loving citizens of the region,
it is increasingly difficult to watch anti-Semitism and
anti-Israel rhetoric become so common whether it be
on campus, in Hollywood, or even on Twitter or Face-
book,” Ms. Daftari said in an interview.
“I do believe this has a lot to do with the mainstream
media and its false and imbalanced approach to cov-
ering the Middle East conflict, namely taking a very
non-nuanced approach to reporting the ongoing war
between Hamas and Israel, but even more so the toler-
ance that the mainstream media platforms have devel-
oped and inspired toward dismissing anti-Semitic rhet-
oric,” she continued.
She does not believe in taking a passive approach to
this disturbing trend.
“It doesn’t matter if it comes from an anchor, a pun-
dit, a member of Congress, or a college professor,” she
warned. “Unless we begin to call out anti-Semitism
across the board, the situation will only get worse.”
Ms. Daftari frequently appears on Fox News, CBS,
NBC, PBS, Voice of America, and SiriusXM commenting
on such topics as the Middle East and North Africa, ter-
rorism, national security, ISIS on the web, global Chris-
tian persecution, human rights, and cybersecurity. Her
exclusive reports have appeared on the Drudge Report,
Fox News, the Telegraph, Newsweek, CNN, the Huffing-
ton Post, and the Washington Post.
She also is director and founding editor of the For-
eign Desk, a newswire service with an emphasis on
global stories relevant to U.S. foreign policy. She says
that her daily “top 10” email containing articles she
chooses as the day’s most vital foreign-affairs stories
reaches 250,000 monthly subscribers.
Because she is the daughter of Iranian immigrants
and therefore speaks fluent Farsi as well as Spanish and
Hebrew, Ms. Daftari has provided Iran-related briefings
and expert testimony to government and private enti-
ties and has written reports for the Pentagon and other
government agencies.
Her documentary film about an Iranian underground
political movement — produced when she was a grad-
uate student in broadcast journalism at the University
of Southern California — was screened before a Con-
gressional subcommittee in 2006 to draw attention to
human-rights abuses and regime change in Iran.
In her talk at the Hadassah meeting, Ms. Daftari
plans to emphasize the point that “anti-Semitism, or
any kind of bigotry, is never a partisan issue. If it is
12 Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019
JS-12*
Lisa Daftari
happening to one group of Americans, it means it can
happen to any other group.”
Accordingly, she says, “It is so important for support-
ers of Israel to find partners in the local community on
both sides of the political divide who are willing to call
out anti-Semitism and anti-Israel rhetoric and are will-
ing to stand up against BDS and call it out as a weapon
that is wrongly used against Israel and against Jews.”
The seeking of
justice can never
be too local or too
minimal in scope.
As reported in the Jewish Standard, last October Ms.
Daftari’s scheduled lecture at Rutgers University on
“Radicalism on College Campuses” was canceled four
days before it was scheduled, apparently because sev-
eral student groups threatened to disrupt it.
Although the Rutgers administration later offered to
reschedule her appearance, she declined, saying: “To
have a small number of students acting very thuggishly
triumph over those students who wanted to come hear
me speak — that’s very upsetting. As an Iranian female,
I’ve always been proud to live in the United States
and have the opportunities I have. That freedom was
stripped from me. I was not able to exercise my First
Amendment freedom.”
Radicalism on college campuses is an issue of great
concern to many Jewish parents and grandparents,
Anti-Semitism,
or any kind of
bigotry, is never a
partisan issue. If it
is happening to one
group of Americans, it
means it can happen
to any other group.
so this topic is bound to be of interest to the Paramus
Bat-Sheva Hadassah audience. But Ms. Daftari said the
problem does not begin at the higher-education level
and must be addressed in whatever context it occurs.
“The seeking of justice can never be too local or too
minimal in scope,” she said. “Whether your child is
in elementary school or attends a large and influen-
tial university, if there is something that is said that is
wrong, action must be taken to correct it. Parents of
younger students should approach the administration
and in the case of college students, parents should
equip their children with the proper confidence and
integrity to speak up when they hear or see injustice.
“There is no other way. Surrendering is not
an option.”
The annual Jean Lipshitz Memorial Meeting is under-
written by Elan Lipshitz in memory of his wife, Jean, a
past president of the chapter. Hadassah Northern New
Jersey, Eric Mark, Rabbi Bob Mark, Jewish Lifecycle
Events, and Jerry Menter also are sponsored.
Hadassah, the Women’s Zionist Organization of
America, is an American Jewish volunteer women’s
organization founded in 1912. Said to be the largest Jew-
ish women’s organization in the United States today,
Hadassah focuses on empowering its members to advo-
cate for health, wellbeing, and support of Israel. Hadas-
sah’s eponymous hospitals in Jerusalem treat some one
million patients of all ethnicities annually and serve as
hubs for groundbreaking medical research.
What: Lisa Daftari discusses “The Rise of
Anti-Semitism Globally and in the U.S.: A Focus
on the Media, College Campuses, and the BDS
Movement,” for Paramus Bat-Sheva Hadassah’s
annual Jean Lipshitz Memorial Meeting
When: Wednesday, June 5. Doors open at 7 p.m.
for dairy refreshments; program at 7:30. A meet
and greet (with $36 donation) follows.
Where: JCC of Paramus/Congregation Beth
Tikvah, East 304 Midland Ave., Paramus
How much: Free, but registration required; no
walk-ins: hadassahgeneralmeeting.eventbrite.com
or ParamusBatShevaHadassah@gmail.com
 JS-13

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Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019 13

 JS-14

Briefly Local

Rockland federation
honors Lisa Green
The Jewish Federation & Foundation of Rockland
County will hold its annual meeting on Monday, June
17, in the Schwartz Family Social Hall at the Jewish
Community Campus, 450 W. Nyack Road in West
Nyack. Lisa Green, outgoing co-vice president, will
be honored for outstanding leadership and volunteer
activism. The teachers of federation’s adult education Lisa Green
program also are being honored. Dinner at 6:30 p.m.;

Courtesy JFNNJ
the program begins at 7:30. The cost is $36; all dietary laws are observed. RSVP
to Jewishrockland.org/annual-meeting or call (845) 362-4200, ext. 121.

Franci Steinberg, left, chair of JFNNJ’s Center for Israel Engagement,

Tal Heinrich, and dinner chairs Leslie and David Smith.
Fair Lawn gala salutes Michael Baer
Michael D. Baer, who just finished a two-year term as president at the Fair Lawn
JFNNJ celebrates partners
Jewish Center/Congregation B’nai Israel, is the honoree at the shul’s annual gala during FedTalk:Israel dinner
on Sunday, June 23, at 4 p.m., in the ballroom. Jewish Federation of Northern New have supported Jewish Federation for
Mr. Baer and his wife, Robin, joined the FLJC/CBI in 2005. Mr. Baer developed Jersey celebrated it Circle of Partners at least 25 years. Ms. Heinrich of i24
curriculum for the religious school and was a Hebrew school teacher and princi- and Dor L’Dor Societ y members News, an international television station
pal. He also sat on the board and executive committee. at a May dinner that preceded the based in Tel Aviv, Paris, New York, and
Mr. Baer, who is a lawyer, is on several nonprofit boards, including Areyvut, FedTalk:Israel program featuring Tal Washington, discussed “International
Breaking the Chain Through Education, and Nechama Comfort. He and his wife Heinrich. Members of both groups Media Bias Against Israel.”
have two children, Julia and Jessica. For more information, call (201) 796-5040.

‘Circle of Light Vigil’ will mark

Gun Violence Awareness Month
A coalition of grassroots commu-
nity groups is planning the “Circle of
Light Walking Vigil” to commemorate
Gun Violence Awareness Month.
for allies who recognize the particu-
lar pain people of faith feel when the
sanctity of houses of worship is shat-
tered by gun violence. As we mourn

Courtesy Milton Ohring

The vigil, set for Sunday, June 2, at
7 p.m., is in response to the recent
uptick in terrorism in houses of wor-
ship around the world, including
Charleston, New Zealand, Pittsburgh,
and Poway, California.
Rabbi Jennifer Schlosberg of the
Glen Rock Jewish Center said, “We
read, in the book of Leviticus (19:16),
‘Do not stand idly by as your neigh-
bor’s blood is shed.’ It is a sad reality
that there is a need to organize a vigil
for this reason, but co-sponsoring as
houses of worship around issues of
gun violence sends the message that
gun safety is a religious and moral
issue that transcends politics.”
The vigil is a collaborative effort
among many community groups and
a continuation of earlier vigils hosted
by the religious communities of
Glen Rock, including the Glen Rock
Jewish Center, which held a com-
munity-wide vigil after the attack in
Pittsburgh in October. Other groups
include Glen Rock After the March,
Moms Demand Action, and Students
Demand Action.
According to Rev. Mark R. Collins,
president of the Religious Communi-
ties of Glen Rock, “We are so grateful
14 Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019
those who have died by gun violence
while at prayer, we are compelled to
join in the call for common sense gun
policies and practices that will make
our congregations — and our commu-
nities — safer.”
After listening to speakers who
include New Jersey State Attorney
General Gurbir Grewal and rep-
resentatives from Moms Demand
Action and Students Demand Action,
the vigil will begin at the Glen Rock
Gurudwara parking lot, 541 Prospect
St. The group will walk down Rock
Road to Harristown Road, and back
to the Gurudwara for a candlelight
ceremony led by local religious lead-
ers. Along the way, the vigil will pass
many houses of worship, creating a
“circle of light” in its path.
To help participants be pro-active in
their advocacy efforts, representatives
from Moms Demand Action will pro-
vide information on actions everyone
can take to prevent senseless gun vio-
lence. They also will distribute orange
ribbon pins; vigil participants are
encouraged to wear orange.
Registration is encouraged at
walkingvigil.eventbrite.com. All are
welcome.
Local artist donates Holocaust
candelabrum for display at SAR
Milton Ohring of Teaneck, an artist and
the grandfather of an SAR graduate,
donated a Holocaust candelabrum he
created to the Riverdale, N.Y., school
to use in its annual Yom HaShoah pro-
gram. A few years ago, when Mr. Ohring
was invited to the school to discuss his
Holocaust-themed sculptures, a teacher
asked if the school could borrow the can-
delabrum for its Yom HaShoah program.
It now is on permanent display there.
(SAR’s Yom HaShoah program, including
the candelabrum, is on YouTube; find it
with SAR HS Yom HaShoah 2019.)
The candelabrum is 17 inches high
and made of stainless steel; candlehold-
ers on top are brass. Six posts, for the six
million victims, are welded to the base,
which is a Jewish star evoking the stars
on the armbands the Jews of Warsaw
were forced to wear. The first post is in
the shape of the electrified posts that
ringed concentration camps; the sec-
ond represents a crematorium, with two
furnace doors at the bottom. The third
post is shaped like a gallow; the fourth, a
lightning bolt, is one half of the two-bolt
insignia SS members wore. A Christian
cross is cut out of the fifth post, repre-
senting the long history of Jewish suffer-
ing in Christian Europe and commemo-
rating the heroic righteous gentiles who
risked their own lives to save Jews. The
sixth post is an arm raised in defiance;
it’s marked with all but one of the digits
that the Nazis tattooed on Elie Wiesel.
Milton Ohring and his parents left
Poland at the end of 1938. For more
information about Mr.Ohring and his art,
go to ohringart.com.
 JS-15

Briefly Local

RCA gala draws 800, 2 YU grads from Passaic

and honors Zygi Wilf named valedictorians

Photos courtesy YU
The Rabbinical College of America held its annual gala On May 30, hundreds of students from Yeshiva University’s
at the Robert Treat Hotel in Newark as 800 supporters undergraduate schools received their degrees at YU’s 88th com-
celebrated the RCA’s past and shared its future vision. mencement exercises at the Theater at Madison Square Garden.
“The growth of the RCA programs is exciting. All of Nine students were named valedictorians for their outstanding
our academic programs are oversubscribed and we academic achievements. Among them were Rochel Hirsch of
are ready to take the next quantum leap forward with the Rebecca Ivry Department of Jewish Studies and Aryeh-Leib
a campus expansion project,” Rabbi Mendy Herson, Deutsch of the Irving I. Stone Beit Midrash Program. Rochel Hirsch Aryeh-Leib Deutsch
the college’s associate dean, said.
Distinguished honoree Zygi Wilf, the owner of the
Minnesota Vikings and the principal of Garden Homes,
said that “‘L’dor v’dor,’ Hebrew for ‘from generation to
generation,’ is the core Jewish value of ensuring that we
properly transmit one generation’s values to the next,
and that is my personal commitment.”
Rabbi Herson said, “The friendship of the Wilf fam-
ily for close to 50 years has been something special
Earn your Master’s in Social Work
to me and to the entire RCA family. Zygi, Mark, and
Lenny, you are following in your parents’ and uncles’
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footsteps and doing so much for the community, for
Israel, and for society.”
Tammy Snyder Murphy, New Jersey’s first lady and
distinguished honoree, shared her deep personal con-
nection with the Jewish community and the special
significance of receiving an honorary degree from the
Rabbinical College of America. “This is an award I do
not take lightly and will forever cherish,” she said. “My Eden M.
late father was Jewish and would be very proud.” Touro MSW ‘20
Erwin Fisch, a Holocaust survivor, the chair of the Career goal: working
RCA board, and Zygi Wilf’s uncle, led a tribute called with the elderly
“A Story of Jewish Triumph.” “After enduring the
unspeakable horror of the Holocaust, Harry and Joe
Wilf’s respective families are fueling Jewish identity,
Jewish community, and Jewish continuity, all across
the globe,” Ms. Fisch said.

Norpac hosts event

gssw.touro.edu
with Maine senator
Rena and David Schlussel
will host a Norpac pro-Israel
gathering on Sunday, June gssw.touro.edu
2, at 7 p.m., in Teaneck,
for Senator Susan Collins
(R-Maine). A supporter of
Israel’s right to exist and
defend itself, she was one
of the first co-signers of the
recent letter which went out Susan Collins
to President Trump regard-
ing Israel’s need to defend itself on its northern bor-
der from terrorist threats.
Senator Collins chairs the Transportation, Hous- Manhattan or Separate classes 100+ clinical Full time, Part- Dr. Steven Huberman
Brooklyn campus for men & women placements time or Blended Founding Dean
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she also serves on the Intelligence Committee as APPLY NOW! ELIGIBLE STUDENTS WHO APPLY BY JUNE 30 MAY
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Enhanced Strategic Cooperation Act (S. 2165) which
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between the two countries in fields such as missile FOR MORE INFO CONTACT:
defense, homeland security, energy, intelligence, Miriam Turk, LCSW • miriam.turk@touro.edu • 646.630.1471
Alan Singer, PhD, LMSW • alan.singer4@touro.edu • 347.532.6348
and cyber-security.
Email Avi@NORPAC.net or call (201) 788-5133.
Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019 15
Cover Story
Unchained at Last
New Jersey group fighting child and forced marriages
wins top prize in Mahwah from Berrie Foundation
Joanne Palmer
M
aybe it’s possible to know
how a baby will react to
adversity as she grows up.
Maybe there’s some way
to know who will give in, who will give
up, who will adjust, who will stop car-
ing, who will be able to make incremen-
tal changes.
Or who will fight back, who will
escape, who will be impassioned and
enraged by injustice and will fight for
others as she did for herself. And black
humor might also be part of that fight,
and it might surface in surprising ways.
It’s hard to know who will turn out in
what way — and hard to accept the fact
16 Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019
that some people, many people, will be
tested in that terrible way — but it is easy
to know that you are in the presence of
a fighter. You can see it. You can feel it.
The presence of the will to justice can
fill a room.
Fraidy Reiss is such a person.
She is the founder and director of
Unchained at Last, a New Jersey-based
nonprofit that helps people — mainly
but not exclusively girls and women, as
she will explain — escape from forced
marriages. The groups also advocate the
abolishment of child marriage, a fight
that must be pursued on the state level.
Earlier this month, Ms. Reiss won the
2019 Russ Berrie Making a Difference
award for her work.
It was the work toward which her
entire life has directed her.
Ms. Reiss, 44, was born into “an
ultra-Orthodox community in Kensing-
ton, in Brooklyn, right outside Borough
Park, where the families that can’t afford
Borough Park live,” she said. Her family
was extremely poor. And it was mixed —
her father’s family was Litvish and her
mother’s were Karliner chasidim. (And
yes, that was a little dark joke.)
And her father was unstable and phys-
ically abusive. And that was not at all a
joke.
The community’s not at all mono-
lithic, she said, but in her part of it,
“everyone’s marriage was arranged in
their teens or early 20s; in the worst-case
scenario you’d be 22 and still single.
Some of the people I knew married as
early as 14.
“It was horrific. In high school” — the
Yeshiva of Brooklyn — “in tenth grade,
at 15, girls could get engaged and they’d
drop out, and we’d have a big party for
them.”
In her world, young women would be
introduced to their potential husbands
and had very little choice but to accept
them, although that of course varied by
family and by the family’s situation and
prospects. “I came from a very poor
family. My parents were divorced” —
eventually her father’s abuse was too
much, and her mother took her children
back to her own parents’ house — “and

In Massachusetts, at left, and in Westfield, above, women dress in bridal gowns at chain-ins as they advocate for an end to child marriage. Last June, Governor
Phil Murphy signed a bill outlawing it in New Jersey; it’s still legal in Massachusetts.
that was very unusual. There was a girl
at school whose parents wouldn’t let her
talk to me because of it.”
So although other young women had at
least some choice, “it was ‘You marry this
guy or be single for the rest of your life.’”
But first the guy had to be found.
“I was not a catch at all. Your marriage
prospects are contingent on your family.
You want parents who are married, and
ideally no one in your family should have
cancer or mental illness or have died in a
car accident.” What? A car accident isn’t
genetic or inheritable, so even by that
sad logic, why? “Because God is pun-
ishing your family,” Ms. Reiss explained.
“Any tragedy is a mark against you.
“So I could marry only into a family
with its own problems.”
There are some ways around that
problem, she added. “My older brother
married a girl from a very poor fam-
ily but she graduated at the top of her
class at the Yeshiva of Brooklyn, and she
also was an excellent cook and baker
and seamstress, so it was likely that
she would make a really good wife and
mother. She was a little more of a catch
than I was.”
JS-17
Cover Story
I was not a
catch at all.
Your marriage
prospects are
contingent on
your family.
And her sister-in-law did marry
her brother, who like Ms. Reiss was
from a poor family with divorced
parents. Being a catch is relative.
There wasn’t much hope for Ms.
Reiss, though. “I was a loudmouth,”
she said. It was not a desirable trait.
Ms. Reiss was matched to a young
man she did not know, they had a
few dates, always in public, and of
course she agreed to the proposal.
There were little danger signals — he
got into fistfights with strangers in At Ramapo College in Mahwah a few weeks ago, Fraidy Reiss, the founder and
the street — but nothing that put her director of Unchained at Last, holds the Russ Berrie Making a Difference award.
off. He never hit her, then or later. She’s flanked by Ramapo’s president, Peter P. Mercer, and Angelica Berrie, presi-
He would punch walls, he would dent of the Russell Berrie Foundation.
Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019 17
 JS-18

Cover Story

drive erratically and dangerously, he
would threaten, he would demean and
belittle and insult and terrorize, but he
never hit her.
Two months after she was married —
and a week after her husband punched
his fist through a wall and she realized
that she’d made a very big mistake — she
was pregnant. “It was a hellish preg-
nancy,” she said. “I was 20, and I had
morning sickness, but it wasn’t just morn-
ing. It was all the time.
“My doctor tried everything. At a certain
point I had to be hospitalized for dehydra-
tion. When I got out, the discharge papers
showed that I weighed 82 pounds. I could
barely walk, and I just kept vomiting. I
couldn’t get to the bathroom, so when
my husband would leave to go to work I
would vomit over the side of the bed. If we
wanted to get out of the house, he would Ms. Reiss speaks in Union Square in Manhattan. 
have to carry me to the car.”
Clearly this was no one’s fault. It had nothing to do
with the community she lived in, or her relationship to
it. But it taught her something vital.
Her OB/GYN — “the same one who did my virginity
test,” she said — did a regular fetal ultrasound, discov-
ered that Ms. Reiss’s kidney had swollen hugely, and
sent her to a specialist. “We’ll have to remove your
rebelled,” Ms. Reiss said. She asked
her gynecologist for birth control,
and got it. “My husband dragged
me to the rabbi, and he said ‘You
can’t do that.’ I had never heard the
terms reproductive rights or bodily
autonomy, but I said to him ‘This is
my body, not yours.’ And the rabbi
said that I could use birth control
for a year. And I said that I would
use it for a year and then another
year and then after that.
“I have no idea what gave me the
courage to do that.”
Still, three years later she had
another baby. “When my older
daughter was two I sent her to a
play group,” Ms. Reiss said. “There
were about 15 or 20 2-year-olds in
the group, and she was the only
SUSAN LANDMANN one without a younger sibling. I
was on tehillim lists. People were
kidney,” the specialist told her. “Right away.” She was praying for me. There was a lot of pressure. So I caved.”
galvanized into going for a second opinion, and the sec- At least one thing was better, though, she said. “The
ond doctor told her that her kidney was fine, although pregnancy was a lot easier.”
there was a great deal of fluid in it. She’d be fine. The Looking back, she said, “I know that I grew up
baby was fine. without any reproductive rights, I was forced to have
In fact, her daughter was fine. She was born at 8.5 a child, I was told I couldn’t use birth control, I had
ounces. But “because the pregnancy was so hellish, I to fight for my own rights.” She does not want that to

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 JS-19

Cover Story

happen to anyone else. one but is free to make her own choices. them,” she said. “And there also are people who are traf-
So there she was, trapped in a loveless marriage “We do both direct services and advocacy,” Ms. Reiss ficked here to be married.” Unchained at Last works with
to an abusive husband and with every expectation said. “Our biggest focus is for ending forced marriage those people.
that she would continue to bear his children. And at any age. We help women and girls and others escape Although forced marriage harms more people than
to make it worse, “I had no financial rights,” Ms. from forced marriages, whether it is a marriage that is child marriage does, it is easier to come up with a legis-
Reiss said. “I would be allowed to get a job only if being planned or if it’s already happened. We provide lative fix to that problem, so Unchained at Last has been
my husband approved it, and I could have my own social services and emotional support to help people get working on it. “In the United States, 248,000 children
money and bank account only if he allowed it. And out of traumatic situations and to start their lives.” were legally married between 2000 and 2010,” she said;
the third part of this trifecta from hell is the limited These services include not only psychological support she’s defining those marriages as having “one or both par-
rights to divorce.” (According to Jewish law, only but physical things, objects, even funding, as well. What- ties under the age of 18.
men can give divorces. Women cannot do that. ever forced marriage survivors need to start new lives, “You don’t become a legal adult in any state before you
They are at their husbands’ mercy.) Unchained at Last gives them. turn 18, and that’s important because you can’t initiate
(It also seems important to say here that despite All the services that Unchained at Last provides are a divorce or run away from home, because if the police
the circumstances of their birth, Ms. Reiss and her free, Ms. Reiss added. She’s developed skills not only as a catch you they will take you back home. Domestic vio-
daughters love each other and respect each other. reporter and then as an investigator — a useful skill given lence shelters can’t take you, so they will send you away
Loveless marriages do not necessarily produce her field — she’s also become an extraordinary fundraiser. or they will call the police and the police will take you
unloved children. Here, it clearly did not.) Some of the people to whom Unchained at Last’s ser- back home.
Ms. Reiss felt trapped. “There was no way out, vices are given might be surprising, until you think it “You can’t marry legally before you are 18,” she con-
no way for me to feed myself and my kids. The through carefully. Although by far most of the people tinued. Either a parent or the judge must consent to
best I could hope for was to become an agunah,” forced to marry are girls and women, sometimes LGBT it; in many states, if a parents wants to have the child
a chained woman, someone tied to a man whom people also are forced into marriage, most often by their get married, “the parental consent form can be signed
she does not want and who does not want her. “A parents. “That turns it into a trauma for generations of even if the child is crying. The clerk has no choice.”
pariah,” she said. people whose lives have been torn apart,” she said. Sometimes consent must come from the judge, who
“I constantly hoped to die,” she said. “I thought Her group’s work focuses on the United States, “but meets with the child, generally in the presence of the
that I was trapped there forever. And I was so sometimes parents take their children overseas to marry adult, and asks if the child wants to be married. “In every
young.”
And then things changed.
No, to be accurate, and then Ms. Reiss made
things change.
She, her husband, and their children had moved
from Brooklyn to Lakewood in 2001. “At 27, I finally
decided to get the hell out, before he killed me or
my daughters,” she said.
She did it incrementally.
The thing that helped her, the rope, the life-
line, the engine, the heart, the soul, the exit that
gave her a new life, was education, she said. She
started at community college and then, at 32, she
graduated from Rutgers. It was during that time
that she left her marriage formally, and she also left
the community she grew up in. In fact, she left the
entire Jewish community. She stopped wearing a
sheitel, stopped keeping kosher, stopped talking to
her family. (Really, they stopped talking to her.)
She majored in journalism and got a job at the
Asbury Park Press. “I didn’t get much of a salary,
but I had enough so that I could change the locks on
the house and get a divorce,” she said. “That’s why
they’re so afraid to let women get an education.”
She and her husband had never been rich, but
her husband worked in construction, and they’d
become more comfortable than she’d been as a
child. They owned a house. “So I was able to sell
the house, and I bought my own tiny little house, a
little Cape Cod. I call it the Palais de Triumphe, the
world’s smallest palace.
“I was the first woman in my family to buy her
own house.”
The memory of her own struggles and her fierce
desire to protect other people from the pain she had
endured led Ms. Reiss to create Unchained at Last in
2011. Even its name reflects Ms. Reiss’s background;
understanding that forced marriages and child mar-
riages happen in a wide range of cultures and sub-
cultures, often but not always in insular religious
communities, Unchained at Last gladly worked with
everyone. Ms. Reiss has learned a lot about other
cultures. But the word unchained comes directly
from the Jewish tradition. An unchained woman is
no longer an agunah; she is bound helplessly to no
Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019 19

Cover Story
single case I’ve heard of, the child has lied to the judge,”
Ms. Reiss said. “Because they’re thinking about what
would happen to them when they got back home.
“Children are completely disempowered throughout
this whole thing.”
Only two states do not allow anyone under 18 to get
married. The first of those states is Delaware, and the
other — ta da! — is New Jersey. Governor Phil Murphy
signed that into law last June, after a lot of hard work
from Fraidy Reiss and Unchained at Last. She takes
many approaches — she lobbies and studies and pro-
poses legal changes. She also leads rallies and demon-
strations. The chain-ins she’s organized feature women,
often in wedding gowns, some with their mouths taped;
the symbolism of those groups of women is startling.
As Ms. Reiss’s organization started to become more
visible — she’s been the subject of stories in the New
York Times, NPR, and the BBC, among many other
outlets — she’s started to get attention from founda-
tions and their donors as well. She’s built a board for
Unchained, and its members are philanthropic and
know other philanthropists.
That’s how she came to the attention of the board of
the Russ Berrie Making a Difference award.
Angelica Berrie of Englewood is a philanthropist; the
Making a Difference award is given in the name of her
late husband, Russ Berrie. (He was and she still is active
in the local Jewish community.)
“Fraidy’s personal story is key to how we talk about
Burn victims
from page 11
unconstrained by what managed care has brought
about. My older brother was an orthopedic surgeon.
I was surrounded by medicine as I grew up in a home
attached to my dad’s office.
“One of the more curious coincidences is that as a
child, Dad was on the medical staff of Holy Name Hos-
pital,” a position he held for 40 years. “I spent a lot of
time in the doctor’s waiting room and other places at
Holy Name. It was a great feeling when I joined forces
with Holy Name to help burn survivors in Haiti.”
Mr. Davis has worked closely with the hospital in
the aftermath of the earthquake in Haiti. While Holy
Name continues to send doctors there, “we were able
to deliver 50 tons of medical supplies because of our
working alliance with Royal Caribbean. The cruise
ships were a flotilla of medical supplies.”
He said that while the earthquake ruptured gas lines
and took down electrical wires, and therefore caused
fires, even more pediatric casualties were the result
of the traditional cooking devices called “rechauds,”
which badly scalded hundreds of kids with boiling oil
or water. Rechauds are charcoal-fired hibachis that
sit on stilts about two to three feet high. “The trem-
ors launched their cauldrons into the air, burning
children within a perimeter of several meters around
them,” he said. The burn center in Port Au Prince was
out of commission, so people traveled north to the
city of Milot, to Sacre Coeur Hospital, which had set
up many tents to act as surgical facilities to accom-
modate this medical migration. That hospital — which
Davis describes as one of the best run in Haiti — is a
project overseen and supported by Holy Name.
Mr. Davis arranged for the shipment of the first
oxygen generator to North Haiti, which was essential
for surgery. He has begun the process of establishing
20 Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019
JS-20
Fraidy Reiss and other protestors tape their mouths and bind their hands in solidarity with the chained
women who are rendered voiceless. Here they demonstrate in Newark.
her issue,” Ms. Berrie said. “The award is about mak-
ing a difference based on your personal motivation.
Who you are, what you are, how you give all are tied
together. Everyone comes from a different place.
“Hers is a unique point of view.”
Visiting burn surgeons Jeremy Goverman of Mass
General/Shriners and Josef Haik, director of the
National Burn Center at Sheba, examine a camper
who hopes to get laser treatment.
an I-PEARLS satellite in that country. Holy Name is
returning the courtesy by shipping the lasers.
How has one person managed to accomplish all
that Mr. Davis has created? “The doors just kept
opening,” he said. “Opportunities to relieve chil-
dren’s suffering just fell into place. Our partners
like Sheba and volunteers from Schneiders are very
committed to rescuing children in distress.”
Still, he noted that most nations have not come
to grips with the truth about burns. “Eighty percent
And it’s a surprising one. “We haven’t had anybody
in that field, working on that issue, in the 23 years that
we’ve been giving that award.”
She focused on ending child marriages. “There are
48 states where it’s legal!” she said. “We think of that
of the problem is psychological,” he said. Even with
the physical handicaps that must be overcome, the
psychological component is pivotal. “How do you
get burn victims to reintegrate, accept their physical
condition, and not buy into what everyone is saying —
‘You’re a burned, scarred kid. We’ll stare at you, bully
you, make you miserable.’”
Parents also may be part of the problem, overpro-
tecting and sheltering their children, which isolates
them even further. Mr. Davis addresses parents before
every camp session; during Camp Sababa’s 10th anni-
versary, he had them come to camp. “I would love
to have a day for family members,” he said. “They
would be ecstatic to see how different their children
are at camp.”
In an average year, Mr. Davis visits Israel two or
three times, Haiti once or twice, Brazil once, and
India once. As more I-PEARLS satellites are added,
he said, he will have to travel more. He has taken his
children to many of the locations he visits; when she
was 18, his daughter Alana, now studying for her mas-
ter’s of public health at Columbia University, helped
him get things organized in Haiti.
Over the last 10 years, Burn Advocates also has
sponsored seven burn surgeons, “mostly post-grads
or those in their first year out of surgical residency, to
attend American Burn Association meetings and visit
burn centers to shadow the doctors there,” Mr. Davis
said. “These enlightened residents will play a major
role in running the laser centers we hope to open this
year in Haiti.
“Our message is simple: Burn camps elevate the
spirit, lasers heal the scars. There are many more
countries whose suffering children we can help.”
Burn Advocates Network is funded through private
donations and fundraising events. For more informa-
tion, go to burnadvocates.org or ipearls.org.
 JS-21

Cover Story
Sandi M. Malkin, LL C
as happening in Arab countries, where children are
betrothed. We think of Jerry Lee Lewis, marrying his
Interior Designer
13-year-old cousin. It’s not something that you think
of as happening here.
(former interior designer of model
“Now that we have an awareness of the issue, we rooms for NY’s #1 Dept. Store)
have to do whatever we can in those 48 states. It’s a
great compelling need, and awareness is the first step.
“The Bible says that we have to take care of the For a totally new look using
most vulnerable among us, the widows and the
orphans,” she added. “These girls and women are your furniture or starting anew.
among the most vulnerable. And we think that we’re
so civilized!”
The Making a Difference award is presented at
Staging also available
Ramapo College of New Jersey in Mahwah. The board
gave 10 awards this year. They come with money,
973-535-9192
because the winners all are people doing hard and
important work. The awards are meant to honor
them, and also to enable them to continue their work

S U M M E R
with even greater vigor.
Of the 10 awards given at Ramapo this year, seven
came with a gift of $7,500, two with $25,000, and the
last with $50,000.
Fraidy Reiss had no idea which award she’d be get-
ting. “They let you know that you won, but until you
show up, you don’t know what you’ve won.
“The morning of the awards I had just come back
from a trip to Nevada. We are working on legislation
there. I had a layover in Dallas, and I ate something
there that was not good for me. I was violently ill. But
I had this award.
“My assumption was that I had won one of the
$7,500 prizes, so would anyone notice if I weren’t
there? But I thought about it, and I realized that it’s
not right to do that.
“So I went, and I put on a red dress because I
thought that it would give me some color, and it was
a really big crowd, and I am like ‘I hope that they call
my name soon.’ I really didn’t feel good. And they got
through the first seven people, the $7,500 awards,
and they don’t call me.
“And then they don’t call me for the first $25,000,
and they start calling the second name, and I push
my chair back, getting ready to get up for it, and then
they call someone else.
“And I look at my friend, and and I say ‘Was this a
mistake, or did I just win $50,000?’ I thought it was
a mistake. But I go on stage, and they show a video
they shot — and even their shooting the video didn’t
tip me off — so I go on stage, and someone says ‘Why
don’t you stand next to me?’ And I say, ‘If you don’t Now, the finest Italian suits, sport jackets, pants, shirts, polos,
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Ms. Reiss knows that she and Unchained at Last
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story, and that being able to tell it liberates and pro-
pels her, and that she can use it for good.
“Being a woman means having to fight for your
rights every single step of the way,” Ms. Berrie said.
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Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019 21
Jewish World

This British university provides

an island of tolerance for Jewish
students amid rising anti-Semitism
CNAAN LIPHSHIZ
BIRMINGHAM, ENGLAND — Before arriving at this
British city’s university, James Harris thought that he
probably was in store for some anti-Semitic abuse
during his academic studies.
A Zionist from a traditional Jewish home in Lon-
don, Harris said his university hunt in 2017 was his
first foray outside the Jewish education system. And it
happened to be in a year when campus anti-Semitism
climbed to unprecedented heights in the United King-
dom, according to observers.
Amid anti-Semitism scandals in Labour — a party
with a 68 percent approval rating on British campuses
— that year kicked off with an ardent anti-Zionist,
Malia Bouattia, presiding over the United Kingdom’s
National Union of Students.
Her remarks about “Zionist-led media” and “Zion-
ist strongholds” in British academia spurred Jewish
groups for the first time to leave the organization in
protest of what they termed anti-Semitic hate speech.
In a 2017 survey of 485 Jewish students in England,
two-thirds said they had been targeted on campus
because of their faith. “It was a worrying time for Jew-
ish students across the country. I was certainly wor-
ried,” Harris said of 2017.
Then Harris visited the University of Birmingham,
an institution whose vibrant Jewish community has
swelled in recent years to about 1,500 members,
many of whom jokingly call it a “Jewniversity.”
With campuses in London, Oxford, and beyond
becoming increasingly inhospitable to Jews, Birming-
ham’s university has seen its Jewish population soar so
dramatically over the past decade that the Jewish stu-
dent body now outnumbers the centuries-old Jewish
community in the United Kingdom’s second largest city.
“I’d say many Jews come here because the Jewish
scene is so active and because it’s a less politicized uni-
versity than some of the ones in London,” Harris, the
former president of the Jewish Society of Birmingham
University, said of the institution. “It tends to draw
more Jews in.”
Around campus, Harris and others often wear
a sweatshirt of their Jewish society, called JSOC in

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22 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019


The library and grounds of the University of Birmingham, England.
campus jargon and pronounced “jay
sock.” It’s emblazoned with a Star of
David — often an invitation for abuse
on campuses throughout the U.K.
Sipping a latte at the busy univer-
sity branch of Starbucks, Harris said
he has never encountered anti-Semitic
abuse wearing the shirt in his three
years studying political science at Bir-
mingham U. To Harris, this safety is
partly rooted, paradoxically perhaps,
in the high visibility of Jews on cam-
pus. Elsewhere in Europe and beyond,
some Jewish students try to keep a low
profile to stay safe. The problem with
doing that is that “eventually people
don’t recognize you as a force to be
reckoned with,” Harris said.
Jewish life at the University of Bir-
mingham is not low profile.
Birmingham JSOC, the largest in Brit-
ain, holds weekly Friday night dinners,
or FNDs, that often attract more than
200 people. There are three student-fo-
cused rabbis on campus as well as sev-
eral rabbis who work in the city.
The local Hillel House is one of only a
handful of residential community cen-
ters for Jewish students still operating
Rabbi Fishel Cohen stands with Jewish students at a Chanukah candle-
lighting ceremony in Birmingham on December 24, 2014.
Jewish World
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climbing plants. On misty days it looks
like an old English estate.
Inside, a ping-pong table in the main
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 Jewish World

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swapping their campus-provided accom- Josh Halima, a 19-year-old law student. He campus. “There is just so much Jewish
modation for a property they rent on the met most of his current Jewish flatmates community life here that it covers the
affordably priced housing market. — four women and four men — at a kosher full range of life,” Halima said, noting
It’s why “there are hundreds of Jews apartment. Most students live in Selly the Hillel and Maccabbi sports clubs
within a 5-minute radius of here,” said Oak, a slightly seedy neighborhood near and a kosher shop with fresh meat in
the Central Synagogue of Birmingham
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And Birmingham has other advan-
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Then there’s the fact that housing
in Birmingham costs about half what
FREE it does in London, and other expenses
In Birmingham, by contrast, Regev’s
address before Harris’ Jewish Society
was attended by a pro-Israel vice chan-
cellor of the university, Robin Mason
— a rare show of legitimacy in British
academia for the Jewish state. “The
message it sent is that Jewish and Zion-
ist students should not need to fear or
hide on campus,” Harris said.
Bouattia, the former president of
the National Union of Students, also
has taken note of the differences at
the University of Birmingham. “The
University of Birmingham is some-
thing of a Zionist outpost in British
Higher Education,” she wrote in an
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That year, she noted, the Students’
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tism, as she termed it.
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 Jewish World

Hen Mazzig, an Israeli activist for the
rights of Jews who fled Arab countries,
tried and failed to deliver a lecture. At
Oxford University in 2010, a student
shouted “slaughter the Jews” during an
address by Israel’s then deputy foreign
minister, Danny Ayalon.
Last year, the Chabad Student Centre
at Oxford was targeted twice by van-
dals who left threatening notes, started
a fire outside, and doused it with white
powder.
In addition to heckling and vandalism,
in recent years Jews say they have been
made to feel institutionally unwelcome
on some British campuses.
Last year, the University of Warwick
hosted a public lecture; several Jews
allegedly were screened and barred
from entry. A King’s College London
researcher argued that Israel’s policy
of subsidizing many fertilization pro-
cedures for all its citizens is “primarily
aimed to serve the reproductive rights of
its Jewish population at the expense of
the indigenous Palestinian population.”
At the University of Leeds, in March
the student government voted against
a motion calling on the British institu-
tion to adopt the International Holo-
caust Remembrance Alliance definition
of anti-Semitism. In February, a student
government association at Oxford’s
Somerville College passed a nonbinding
motion to effectively ban all halal and
kosher meat.
Bouattia was not re-elected as presi-
dent of the National Union of Students,
and her single term ended in 2017. But
anti-Semitic abuse has continued and
arguable worsened on British campuses
and beyond.
Still, even outside Birmingham,
“broadly speaking, the vast majority of
Jewish students are having a positive
experience at university,” Harris said,
despite the occurrence of incidents.
“There has been a massive increase in
the number of Jews coming to study here
over the past decade, five years even,”
said Rabbi Fishel Cohen, a Chabad rabbi
who has worked as a chaplain at the Uni-
versity of Birmingham for more than 30
years. That has been a welcome devel-
opment for the Jewish community in the
city of Birmingham — a graying congre-
gation that is one of Europe’s friendliest.
(“If you’re a stranger and you come to
our shul, you will be approached and
invited to lunch,” David Benson, 68, said
about his Central Synagogue.)
This outreach has paid off for the
dwindling Jewish communit y of
Birmingham, which used to be one of
the country’s largest but now has about
1,000 members. (At the local Jewish
school, about 80 percent of the students
are non-Jews, most of them from Muslim
families.)
The students help with assembling a
minyan. “Getting it sometimes is a strug-
gle,” said Sybil Prais, 56, who often orga-
nizes Shabbat meals for students and
other congregants at Central Synagogue,
one of Birmingham’s four Jewish houses
of worship.
But beyond that, the students “are
more or less the only young people in
the congregation,” said Prais, whose two
daughters live in London and Leeds.
“The students bring their enthusiasm,
there’s always chatting at shul. It’s just
much livelier with them.”
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 Jewish World One stop for all your
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Alabama Jews confront Devorah T. Schatz
restrictive abortion law Pediatric Speech & Language Pathologist
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leaves her house in Montgomery, Ala- beliefs in explaining her decision to Call Today!
bama, with an umbrella. The 64-year- sign the legislation. She called it a 201-657-2648 • schatzsllc@gmail.com
old registered nurse doesn’t need it to “powerful testament to Alabamians’
shield her from the rain. Instead she deeply held belief that every life is pre-
uses it to block patients from protesters cious and that every life is a sacred gift
who come to the health clinic where from God.”
she has been volunteering every week A number of national Jewish orga-
since September. nizations, including the Jewish Coun-
Reproductive Health Services is the cil for Public Affairs, the Conservative
only clinic in the city, and one of only movement’s Rabbinical Assembly,
three in the state, that performs abor- the Reform movement’s Central Con-
tions. Weil escorts patients who come ference of American Rabbis, Jewish
from around Alabama and nearby Women International, Hadassah, the
states on Fridays, the day when pro- National Council of Jewish Women,
cedures are done. She and a group of and the Jewish Democratic Council
about 10 volunteers use the umbrellas of America have condemned the law.
and play music to shield the women The Anti-Defamation League criti-
from 10 or so protesters who show up cized the bill before it was passed for
every week to yell at the women. Pro- language comparing abortion to the
testers also set up a van near the clinic Holocaust.
offering ultrasounds, trying to dissuade A. Eric Johnston, an attorney who
women from ending their pregnancies. heads the state’s Pro-Life Coalition
“They’re hateful,” Weil said. “One of and wrote the bills, defended the
the things that I remember, the first Fri- comparison. “Nobody has a corner
day after January 1st, I was there and on being offended just because their
they were screaming, ‘Don’t be the first
one to murder your baby this year.’”
people were killed,” Johnston told CBS
News. “It’s offensive to say that [this
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signed a near-total ban on abortion Alabama’s largest synagogue, Temple
into law. The law, which goes into Emanu-El, is in Birmingham, where the
effect in six months, bans abortion majority of the state’s approximately
in all cases except to prevent serious 10,000 Jews live. The synagogue counts
health risk to the mother. It sets up around 600 families and most are pro-
a challenge to Roe v. Wade, the 1973 gressive, especially on social issues,
landmark case that guarantees a wom- according to Cantor Jessica Roskin.
an’s right to an abortion until the end “We as Reform Jews believe very
of the second trimester. (Because of strongly in the concept of social jus-
the federal legislation, the Alabama tice,” Roskin said. “I think what people
law — along with stringent abortion get so confused about is this really to us
laws recently enacted in other states — isn’t a political issue, it’s a human issue.
almost surely will be held up in court.) This is about human beings and their
Weil, who works at an HIV clinic, said bodies and their privacy.”
her reaction to the new law was one of Weil, too, cited her Reform Jewish
“horror and disgust. It’s so disappoint- identity in explaining why the issue ••Farm
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horrified that people want to control that Reform Judaism has tremendously International
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It’s none of their business,” she said. lot of things, but definitely social justice
Like many Jews in the state, Weil is issues and things like right to abortion,”
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teered for the campaign of Represen- On Friday, she again will head to the
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narrowly won a Senate election over volunteers, but last week there were June through October
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Republican Roy Moore. Her rabbi, Scott several new people, she said. The new Noon
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140-family strong Reform congregation gives her “immediate gratification.” Tune
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JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019 27

Editorial
E pluribus unum
I then proclaim liberty
spent Memor i al Day
in Metuchen, a small,
improbably idyllic Central
Jersey town.
It’s a walkable town with
houses of different sizes, dating
from different periods, of dif-
ferent colors and shapes, with
well — but not intimidatingly well
— maintained gardens, huge old
leafy trees that distort the slate
sidewalks that only sort of cover
them (some homeowners have
given up and replaced the slate
with cement, but that bulges
too), bright flowerbeds, and a
small, interesting downtown with
only local stores and no empty
storefronts.
It’s got a colonial-era cemetery
right on Main Street, with very
old graves, some of them no lon-
ger legible, others a fascinating
look into relationships both with
people and with objects. We see
the relationships, the tragedies
of small children struck down
and the miracles of unexpectedly
long lives. We see how many of
the men buried there were Rev-
olutionary War veterans. And
we see how precious stone and
workmanship must have been
— all of the stones have carefully
engraved lettering, and the let-
ters all seem to be the same size,
but words break oddly. “Beloved
Mo” on one line, and “ther and
wife” on the next, as if the mate-
rial and the time were too pre-
cious to waste.
It’s a really old cemetery and a
really old town.
On Memorial Day, Metuchen
put on a parade, and we joined
the crowd to watch.
The marchers were delegations
of police officers and firefighters,
Girl Scouts and Boy Scouts, ROTC
groups, local librarians, teachers,
Jewish Editor
Joanne Palmer
Standard Associate Editor
Larry Yudelson
1086 Teaneck Road
Community Editor
Teaneck, NJ 07666
Beth Janoff Chananie
(201) 837-8818
Fax 201-833-4959 About Our Children Editor
Heidi Mae Bratt
Publisher
James L. Janoff
Associate Publisher Emerita
Marcia Garfinkle
thejewishstandard.com
28 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019
veterans of World War II, Korea,
Vietnam, and everything else that
followed.
And it was everyone.
There were babies pulled
in wagons, and babies sitting
on what must have been their
great-grandparents’ laps as
they stared out at us with those
little-kid stares. There were
white people and black peo-
ple, Christians and Muslims and
Jews, Southeast Asians and Indi-
ans, men and women, girls and
boys. The teenagers in the ROTC
groups were particularly strik-
ing. We had time to look at them
as they did their drill routines,
and we saw that they both rep-
resented everyone and melded
entirely into one unit.
There were the reminders of
September 11 that reduced many
of us to tears — but then I already
was a puddle from the emotion,
and from the earnestness, and
from the vast diversity in this one
small town.
To look at these hopeful faces
— old and young faces, with fea-
tures from all over — was to
remember what it was that has
made America what it is, and to
hope that some day we will over-
come the mania that is affecting
and dividing and enraging us now
and remember e pluribus unum.
Out of many, one.
It’s easy to believe in that
as you stand on Main Street in
Metuchen, in a postcard-perfect
street on a postcard-perfect day.
But Main Street in Metuchen is
not Disney World. It’s not perfect,
of course, and it doesn’t pretend
to be — but it is real.
So can the hope of a happier,
kinder future be real. We just
have to work toward it. —JP
Correspondents
Warren Boroson
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KEEPING THE FAITH
Celebrate Shavuot,
throughout the land
M
emorial Day is behind us and July This preoccupation carried through to this
4th arrives in less than five weeks. nation’s Founding Fathers, many of whom were
Both owe their meaning to the proficient in Hebrew, including James Madison,
Torah, the giving of which we cel- our fourth president and “the father of the Con-
ebrate on Shavuot, beginning Saturday night. stitution.” As Dr. John Woodland Welch, writing
The three are inextricably linked, but the link in the Brigham Young University Law Review,
between the two secular observances and the noted: The Torah’s laws were “nothing short
Torah is being eroded. of the underlying fabric upon which American
That such a link exists is visibly displayed society was founded…. [T]he profound influ-
on that enduring symbol of this nation’s birth, ence of biblical law on early American colonial
the Liberty Bell, on which are law is obvious to those who have
engraved words taken straight studied seventeenth century law
out of last week’s Torah portion, in America…. This utilization
Parashat B’har: “Proclaim liberty of biblical law was not a passing
throughout the land, unto all the fancy in colonial America.”
inhabitants thereof.” That words taken from last
On Memorial Day, we recalled week’s parashah are engraved on
(or should have recalled) the the Liberty Bell, therefore, is no
1.3 million people who died in accident.
service to this country — and to And yet, do we still hold true
those words — from 1776 until this Shammai here in this country to those val-
year. To borrow a phrase from Engelmayer ues and to that promise? The
Abraham Lincoln’s Gettysburg evidence suggests that we do
Address, they gave their “last full not. What follows are some of
measure of devotion” to defend what this nation the divergences; unfortunately, there are many
was created to promote: freedom, liberty, and more.
equality for all people. We will begin with immigration. On the Mon-
This nation was founded on concepts virtu- day, May 20, for example, a 16-year-old boy
ally all of which came from the Torah and the named Carlos Hernandez Vásquez died while
rest of the Bible, the Tanach. This is beyond dis- being held in U.S. custody because he sought to
pute. As the philosopher and historian Hartley come here in search of the very freedoms we
Burr Alexander observed regarding the Puritans enjoy. He was the sixth child to die in custody in
in his essay, “The Hebrew Contribution to the the last eight months. Until eight months ago, no
Americanism of the Future,” the Tanach, and would-be immigrant child held by U.S. authori-
especially the Torah, “formed their minds and ties had died in more than a decade, and never
dominated their characters; its conceptions have so many died in so short a period of time.
were their conceptions.” Others who died include a 16-month-old child, a
The Torah especially “colored all their activi- 2-year-old, a 7-year-old, and an 8-year-old. There
ties,” according to the late NYU Professor Abra- may be even more, because we only learned of
ham Katsh. They “accepted biblical precepts the sixth death later that week. That sixth death,
and commandments literally and applied them of a 10-year-old girl, actually was the first; it went
vigorously,” he wrote. unreported for eight months.
Shammai Engelmayer is rabbi of Congregation Beth Israel of the Palisades, now in Fort Lee.
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So many of us in this country are
here because either we, or our par-
ents, or our grandparents, or our
great-grandparents came here hop-
ing to share in its promise of liberty,
equality, and freedom. The more
than 1.3 million people who died in
the service of our nation since 1776
died for that promise and those
values. Yet today, it seems, we not
only seek to deny that promise to
others, but we are treating them in
ways none of us would ever care to
be treated, and we are seeing chil-
dren die because of that treatment.
The Torah tells us more than
50 times, for example, to treat
the strangers in our midst as
we would want to be treated —
that is way far more times than
for any other law in the Torah.
(Laws relating to Shabbat obser-
vance, for example, appear only
nine times.) Four weeks ago, in
Parashat K’doshim, not only
were we told to “love your fellow
as yourself,” we also were told to
“love [the stranger] as yourself.”
Regarding racial equality, the
Torah makes no distinction
between one person and another.
All people are descended from
Adam’s son Seth. (See Genesis
5:3.) All people are equal in its
eyes, and it wants all people to be
equal in our eyes. This is an even
“greater principle of the Torah”
than “love your neighbor,” accord-
ing to the sage Shimon Ben Azzai.
(See the Jerusalem Talmud Trac-
tate Nedarim 9:4.) This, too, is not
a value that resonates with a large
segment of our citizenry.
In another area, the Torah in so
many ways seeks a level playing
field between men and women,
but we still do not have a level
playing field, certainly not in
American life (and, sadly, not even
in Jewish life). We are still far away
from equal pay for equal work, for
equal opportunities for men and
women. The glass ceiling still is
pretty much intact.
Then there are the various
issues involving education. The
Torah insists that all the people
— all men, all women, and all chil-
dren, and even to the strangers
within our gates — be taught what
it says. (See especially Deuteron-
omy 31:11-12.) In other words, it is
the community’s job to see to it
that everyone has an education,
and that the education be an
equal one for all. That, too, is not
something we seem to value here,
at least not any more (assuming
we ever did).
The Torah insists that we must
respect the privacy of others (see
Deuteronomy 24:11). It insists that
we must take care of the poor (see,
for example, Deuteronomy 15:11)
and the elderly (see, for exam-
ple, Leviticus 19:32), and see to
the good health of everyone (see,
for example, Leviticus 13:2-4 and
succeeding texts, and Leviticus
Rabbah 16:8.) The Torah insists
that justice be truly blind, and that
it be equally meted out. (See, for
example, Leviticus 19:15.) Yet our
government seeks to water down
privacy rights, eliminate programs
that aid the poor, and maintain a
justice system that is far from
being even-handed — with limited
objections from “we, the people.”
The Torah, beginning at the very
beginning (see Genesis 2:15), insists
that we must protect our environ-
ment and our ecology. It insists,
very explicitly in so many ways,
that we must respect and care for
our animals as well. (See, for exam-
ple, Exodus 20:10, 23:5 and 23:12,
Deuteronomy 22:4, 6-7, and 10.) Try
telling that to Congress, or to most
voters on the right (on, not in).
On Memorial Day, we were sup-
posed to take a moment at 3 p.m.
to remember those 1.3 million
martyrs to the cause of freedom,
equality, and liberty. But we also
must do other things that are far
more meaningful than standing for
a moment of silence one day out
of every year. First, on Shavuot,
we need to study Torah, to see for
ourselves what it says about life,
liberty, and equality.
Then, even before July 4th
arrives, we need to shout out loud,
“Proclaim liberty throughout
the land, to ALL the inhabitants
thereof,” and then we must — all
of us must — work to make those
words mean what they say. (This
includes voting on Primary Day
— this Tuesday — and on Election
Day.) For if we do not make those
words mean what they say, July
4th will have lost its meaning, and
those 1.3 million martyrs whose
memories we recalled on Monday
will have died for nothing.
To quote Lincoln again, “the
great task remaining before us [is]
that from these honored dead we
take increased devotion to that
cause for which they gave the last
full measure of devotion — that we
here highly resolve that these dead
shall not have died in vain — that
this nation, under God, shall have
a new birth of freedom, and that
government of the people, by the
people, for the people, shall not
perish from the earth.”
Opinion
Lo levad (you are not alone)
is easier said than done
W
hen I think about my dad at
home through all the years of turing and sustaining good mental health.
my growing up, I think of him Through meditative prayer, singing, text study,
as alone. And when I think
about my mom through those same years, I
think of her as lonely.
My dad, who was living with bipolar disor-
der, spent months at a time inside our house,
often in his bed, almost always alone. My mom
went to work every day, and my brother and I
went to school. When we got home, there he
was, on the couch, watching television.
I was a kid. It never occurred to me to won-
der about how alone he was. He was my dad
— funny, smart, devoted to his family. Most of
the time, he was also bitter, angry, and dark.
Then would come the weeks of mania, when
he was full of ideas, excitement,
and risky behavior.
In the 1950s and 1960s, no
one understood my father’s
mood swings. My parents’
friends wondered and perhaps
pitied, but mostly they stayed
away. Those friends who tried
to help often were pushed away
by my dad’s anger. My dad’s
parents fretted that they had Rabbi Paula
done something wrong to cause Mack Drill
such brokenness. My mother’s
parents urged her to leave my
dad, and bring my brother and me to live in
their house. Instead, my mother stood by my
father, the love of her life.
She held him and us together. There were no
support groups for her, synagogue was not a
safe place, and her friends were not equipped
to understand. I wonder who possibly could
have listened to her without judgment, even if
she could have articulated her sorrow and her
rage. She must have been very lonely.
I thought a great deal about my parents
throughout the month of May as we observed
Mental Health Awareness Month. In syna-
gogues and community centers throughout
Rockland and Bergen counties, we experienced
a wealth of opportunities to open our hearts, to rabbi prescribes talk therapy to lower the per-
educate ourselves toward deep understanding,
and to empower us to be advocates.
At my synagogue, Orangetown Jewish Cen-
ter, we dedicated a Shabbat to mental health.
Our mental health committee (ojccares4U@
gmail.com) planned a special day of prayer
and learning designed to create feelings of
Paula Mack Drill is a rabbi at the Orangetown
Jewish Center in Orangeburg. She also has
been a social worker at Daughters of Israel
Geriatric Center and Golda Och Academy,
both in West Orange, and the assistant director
of Ramah Day Camp in Nyack.
The opinions expressed here are those of the authors, not necessarily those of the newspaper’s editors, publishers,
or other staffers.We welcome letters to the editor. Send them to jstandardletters@gmail.com.
well-being and happiness — keystones to nur-
and guided building of relationships, we prac-
ticed experiences that promote resilience.
For example, we walked in silent meditation
from the daily chapel to the bima in the sanctu-
ary to receive Torah, a powerful re-enactment
of Mount Sinai. Tradition tells us that everyone
received Torah in his or her own way. God does
not see anyone as broken, because everyone
is created in God’s image. And so we walked
together as a community, from the 4-year-old
twins skipping to the 90-year-old couple walk-
ing carefully, using their canes.
Being together in a community where every-
one is accepted as “just fine,” just the way they
are, is a most powerful sustainer
of mental wellness. Everyone
who was in our synagogue that
day felt this crucial teaching in
our very souls. But I wondered
about all of those people who
needed such a Shabbat and
could not be there.
Over three Thursday eve-
nings, Rabbi Craig Scheff taught
Torah and rabbinic texts that
address Judaism’s understand-
ing of mental illness and well-
ness. One text that touched me
deeply is a discussion about Proverbs 12:25
that says: “If there is care in a man’s heart, let
him quash it [yashhena].” In a talmudic debate,
Rabbi Ami and Rabbi Asi disagree about the
intention of that verse in Proverbs, based on
different pronunciations of the verb “quash.”
“One said: He should forcefully push it out of
his mind. And one said: It means he should tell
others his concerns.” (Yoma 75a). Both rabbis’
opinions can be interpreted as therapeutic in
their understanding of the destructive power
of dysfunctional, circular thinking. One rabbi
prescribes banishing the thoughts — I imagine
him using behavioral interventions to help his
client stop the harmful loop — while the other
son’s anxiety. Rabbi Ami and Rabbi Asi have
different methodologies, but they agree that
the person suffering from disruptive thoughts
must deal with the matter.
Everyone who participated in these study
sessions came to understand that our tradi-
tion has named and understood mental illness
from ancient times. Rabbi Scheff’s teaching
made clear that the wisdom of Judaism pro-
vides authority to combat the stigma of men-
tal illness and a salve for its associated pain.
But I wondered about all of those people who
needed these classes and could not be there.
SEE LO LEVAD PAGE 33
JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019 29
Opinion
Safety from gun violence should not be partisan
M
y 6-year-old daughter
overheard me talking
about putting up orange
ribbons on the trees on
our property. Orange is the color associ-
ated with advocacy against gun violence.
“Why will you put up orange ribbons,
Mommy?”
My heart sank.
Shouldn’t my conversations with my
young children focus on sharing or using
manners or something elementary like
that? How would I explain gun violence
to my young children without making
them feel frightened?
“Orange is a color that we use to let
people know that we want a safe world,”
I told her. “Some people do things that
aren’t safe to others. Don’t you want a
safe world, sweetie?”
“Mommy, of course safety is import-
ant… So what’s for dinner?”
Protection from gun violence is a
basic human right that even my children
understand, and certainly one that they
deserve.
Gun violence should not be a partisan
issue.
I remember when I first fired a gun. I
was in college and I went to a shooting
range with friends. As I approached the
checkout counter, the cashier asked me
how many rounds I wanted and what
Josh Gottheimer: Bipartisanship in action
J osh Gottheimer is my representa-
tive in Congress. He is my friend.
He is a loving son, doting father,
loyal husband, and valued ally. He
is smart, kind, and indefatigable when it
comes to working for his constituents and
their shared future.
Sadly, Congressman Gottheimer has
found himself in the crosshairs of extrem-
ists on both sides of the aisle. Like many
others before him, he is being attacked for
his strong support for the historic U.S.-Is-
rael relationship — our alliance with the
only true democracy in the region, and
one that is vital to America’s interests and
national security.
Deploying age-old anti-Semitic tropes,
these new detractors are questioning
Gottheimer’s loyalty to our country and
flogging him for his work against BDS and
with AIPAC and other pro-Israel groups.
They’ve even used anti-Semitic radical
publications to fabricate character-assas-
sinations about him for having the temer-
ity to stand up to those espousing anti-Se-
mitic statements and views in Congress
30 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019
type of gun I preferred, and suggested
that I wear earmuffs to protect my ears.
I walked into the range, which was set
up like a bowling alley, and shared a lane
with a friend. I did my best to aim at the
target, and although I can’t remember
how well I did, I do remember that firing
the bullets made my arm ricochet back
towards my face.
I remember exactly what it felt like to
shoot that gun. Absolutely thrilling.
And then I left the range. After I
walked out the door, I realized that no
one checked my identification, nor that
of my friends. I also realized that anyone
in the range could have opened fire on
any of us, since the guns were handed to
us without question. If I was in an unsafe
mental state, I could have caused harm
to others or to myself. As I drove home
from the range, I still had that thrilling
feeling of firing a gun, but it combined
with something else now. I felt unsafe.
I suspect that is exactly what connects
me with my friends, family, and fellow
Americans who own guns. I understand
that feeling of wanting to be protected
— reasons why we might carry guns. I
understand that thrilling feeling that
comes along with firing a gun for rec-
reational or gaming purposes. I even
understand that carrying guns gives
someone a sense of control after they
and around the country.
We have seen this movie before. We
know that to make a different and better
ending, we must stand strong, together,
against haters, wherever they are, on either
side of the political spectrum.
I believe that facts matter, especially in
the face of propaganda and unsubstanti-
ated claims. We are compelled to use our
voices to stand up against the oppressed
and the innocent, just as our Torah teaches.
Thus, allow me to share some unchal-
lenged facts about my congressional repre-
sentative, Josh Gottheimer.
Josh is first and foremost a family per-
son. Nothing comes before his wife of 12
years, Marla, and their two children. Josh
holds two near-perfect attendance records,
one for voting in Congress and the other
for dance recitals and little league games.
Shabbat and holiday dinners with his fam-
ily are sacrosanct. He models — both for his
loved ones and for his district — that family
always comes first, and there is no substi-
tute for love, support, and presence.
Josh has set the bar incredibly high, even
experienced traumatic
violence in their own lives.
If you fall into any of these
categories, I can appre-
ciate your desire to have
your Second Amendment
rights protected. I am not
going after those rights.
But I also hope that if
you fall into that category Rabbi
of people, you will join Jennifer
us at the table to protect Schlosberg
your children and mine
from gun violence. That’s
because gun violence should not be a
partisan issue.
We cannot debate the facts. According
to a study done by the Center for Disease
Control and Prevention, nearly 40,000
people in America died in 2018 from
gun violence. That is a record high. Our
country has not seen numbers like that
since 1968, more than 50 years ago. This
statistic does not even include the inju-
ries. I will not wait until my child is one who you will vote for at the polls, come
of those statistics, God forbid, and you
should not wait either. I ask you to join
me at the table.
We can debate the reasons behind
gun violence. We can blame the under-
lying root of the cause, perhaps mental
illness or some sort of hate crime. We
can point fingers at our existing gun
though he is in only his sec-
ond term in Congress. He
works tirelessly for the
people of New Jersey’s 5th
District.
Let’s start with protect-
ing his constituents. Under
Gottheimer’s influence,
protection for all places of
worship has increased from Rabbi David-
$500,000 to $1.75 million. Seth Kirshner
Josh has held many town
hall meetings and sessions
with faith-based leaders to solicit their
opinions and share the pulse of their com-
munity with Washington.
Josh is a leader and rising star among
his fellow Democrats, who offer respect
for his tireless approach and bipartisan,
results-oriented style. While proud of his
party, he will not hesitate to buck the lead- man Gottheimer always has embraced
ership if he believes it is in the best inter- his Judaism. He has never run away from
est of his constituents and the country.
Josh’s outspokenness on the Iran deal is
but one of a few critical examples — there
is also his work to lower taxes, improve our
safety laws that are not
even being carried out.
But I am not interested
in having this debate.
Because, let’s be honest, we
need to fix all the above. We
need to radically organize,
together. We need to think
out of the box. We need to
be determined. We need to
not accept the status quo.
The “we” is important,
though. People of all faiths
and creeds, races and pol-
itics should unite around this issue to
protect our children. I would expect that
Jews, Muslims, Christians, Sikhs, and
Buddhists, people of all races and sexual
orientations, and Democrats and Repub-
licans would be outraged when an act of
gun violence takes place and to mobilize
to ensure that we, together, do something
to end gun violence. Please, for the safety
of your children and mine, regardless of
together to figure out a plan to make our
country a safer place to live.
I am proud that I live and serve as rabbi
in a town where there has been grass-
roots organizing around this issue. With
the support of my fellowship experience
with JOIN for Justice and our partnership
with faith-based organizers at New Jersey
health care, fix our infra-
structure, and stand by our
veterans, seniors, and first
responders.
Josh always has an arm
outstretched across the aisle
to coordinate and collabo-
rate with fellow members
of Congress, regardless of
affiliation. Josh co-chairs the
bipartisan Problem Solver
Caucus, which is founded
on sharing common denom-
inators and working together to further our
country regardless of political affiliation.
Because of his leadership, Gottheimer was
ranked the eighth most bipartisan mem-
ber of the Congress. Eighth out of 435 is an
impressive showing.
Josh is proud of his heritage. Congress-
it. He and Ted Deutsch, co-sponsored
and spearheaded the charge against
anti-Semitism raising its nasty head in
Congress. He has spoken in a loud and

Together, I personally led a group
from my congregation to petition
local municipalities to sign onto the
“Do Not Stand Idly By” campaign,
a nonpartisan, nonlegislative effort
to bring gun manufacturers into the
conversation as well. This campaign
is named after the verse in Leviti-
cus (19:16), “Do not stand idly by the
blood of your neighbor.” I also stood
with fellow clergy members across
New Jersey as we petitioned for, and
then watched, Governor Phil Murphy
sign on this past March.
I am also proud that the orange rib-
bons that adorn my trees are there
because of the talented organizing
efforts of a group in my town, Glen
Rock After the March. In honor of
Gun Violence Awareness Month,
the group has organized a “Circle of
Light” walking vigil. The vigil, which
will take place on June 2 at 7 p.m.,
will begin at Glen Rock’s Sikh Gurud-
wara with some prayers, speeches,
and songs. Then participants will
walk around town, passing houses of
worship, creating a circle of light and
inspiring hope for change. I am hon-
ored to speak at the closing ceremony
of this gathering, which will also end
at the gurudwara. (All are welcomed,
but RSVPs are appreciated at walk-
ingvigil.eventbrite.com).
It is significant to me that this event
is co-sponsored by the Religious
full-throated voice condemning all
forms of hate speech. Josh has a
zero-tolerance approach to anti-Semi-
tism and anti-Zionism, while allowing
criticism of Israel and its leadership
when appropriate. Josh has been pas-
sionately opposed to BDS, a stalwart
of the U.S.-Israel relationship and the
economic interests that union shares,
and has been a frequent visitor to the
State of Israel. While other of Got-
theimer’s freshman colleagues are
praising the likes of Hamas, (branded
a terrorist organization by the United
States and like-minded countries),
Josh has been at the forefront of insur-
ing Israel can defend herself with
continued funding for Iron Dome,
David Sling, and Arrow, all defensive
armaments to protect Israel from the
multitude of foreign enemies on her
border. While some turn a blind eye
to terror, Josh takes it on at its core.
He has sought to defund Palestinian
Islamic Jihad, Hamas, and other ter-
rorist entities that claim at its char-
ter genocidal ambitions. Josh has his
coordinates finely calibrated towards
good against evil.
Communities of Glen Rock, an inter-
faith group of clergy and laity from
houses of worship in town. Despite
differences in politics of members in
this group, I am pleased to say that
after very respectful dialogue, it was a
near-unanimous decision to officially
serve as co-sponsors for this event.
These are two examples of efforts —
on a local and on a statewide level
— that involved people of all faiths,
races, and sexual orientations. Most
significantly, however, is the fact that
both efforts involved people who vote
blue and people who vote red.
As a rabbi, I am supposed to tell
you to send “thoughts and prayers”
to those affected after a tragedy.
And while that is nice, the truth is
that prayers don’t seem to be solv-
ing this problem.
Just as carrying a weapon is a
right protected by the Constitution,
protection from gun violence must
be considered a basic human right.
Gun violence exponentially targets
our public spaces, houses of worship
and our schools. Therefore, politi-
cians at all levels, local community
members, students and teachers,
and members of houses of worship
need to organize around protecting
this basic human right.
Jennifer Schlosberg is the rabbi of the
Glen Rock Jewish Center.
What I respect most about Josh
Gottheimer is that he does not
come to Washington with a per-
sonal agenda. He supports, defends,
promotes, and fights for the rights
of the people of his district and all
Americans. He infuses his wisdom,
thoughtfulness, deference, curi-
osity, and loyalty to every bill he
sponsors and every issue he takes
on. Josh knows that when his con-
stituents are represented properly,
our future is bright. If you were to
spend even a small amount of time
with Josh in any of his natural hab-
itats, you will be captured by these
characteristics, and many more.
If those seeking to do Congress-
man Josh Gottheimer harm by name
calling and finger wagging would get
to know him and work together, per-
haps the change our country yearns
for would be closer to realization.
David-Seth Kirshner is senior rabbi of
Temple Emanu-El of Closter, immediate
past president of the New York Board of
Rabbis, and the president of the North
Jersey Board of Rabbis.
Kaddish for Tim Conway
R
abbi Broka of Choza was a
talmudic sage and mystic to
whom, it is said, Elijah the
Prophet appeared in the mar-
ketplace of Beit Lefet (see Taanit 22A).
Taking advantage of this unearthly
encounter to inquire into divine secrets,
Broka asked: “Is there anyone in this mar-
ketplace who is destined for Olam Ha-Ba
— eternal life and reward in the World to
Come?” In the course of their conversa-
tion, Elijah pointed out two men, indi-
cating that they were assured of divine
reward in the hereafter. An intrigued
Rabbi Broka approached the pair and
asked, “What work do you do? What is
your profession?” The two responded:
“We are jokers. We bring happiness to
those who are sad. Additionally, if we find
people divided by strife or
conflict, we expend every
effort to reconcile them.”
(Rashi adds: “through the
medium of humor”).
If jokers and jesters are
uniquely worthy of eternal
reward, it seems only proper
to pay tribute to consum-
mate comedian Tim Conway
(1933-2019), who died on Rabbi Joseph
May 14 at the age of 85. He H. Prouser
perhaps is most celebrated
for his work on the “Carol
Burnett Show,” where he brought to life
such characters as the Oldest Man and
the businessman Mr. Tudball. As Mr. Tud-
ball, he employed a signature Romanian
accent (often mistaken for Swedish), mod-
eled after his immigrant mother’s. Memo-
rably, he would address his secretary, Mrs.
Wiggins, played by Burnett, with a distinc-
tive pronunciation: “Mrs. AH-WHIggins.”
As Mr. Tudball, and in a wide variety of
sketches, Conway had the uncanny abil-
ity to keep a straight face while forcing his stone, is approaching.
co-stars (in particular, Harvey Korman) to
break character and dissolve in laughter.
My own long history as a Tim Con-
way devotee predates the “Carol Burnett
Show.” It was firmly established by Con-
way’s role as the sweet and wholesome
if bumbling and hapless Ensign Charles
Beaumont “Chuck” Parker on McHale’s
Navy, which was filmed in black and
white. The show first ran from 1962-1967
— and ever since in syndication. Ensign
Parker was second in command of PT-73,
deployed in the Pacific Theater of World
War II. Conway played opposite the leg-
endary Ernest Borgnine (as Lieutenant
Commander Quinton McHale) and Joe
Flynn (as Captain Wallace “Old Leadbot-
tom” Binghamton). Conway was a loyal
friend and colleague to these shipmates.
Joseph H. Prouser is the rabbi of Temple
Emanuel of North Jersey in Franklin Lakes.
Opinion
He subsequently teamed up with Flynn
for joint comedic efforts, and feted Bor-
gnine at his 90th birthday celebration.
Tim Conway is less remembered for the
short-lived “Tim Conway Show,” which was
canceled after 13 weeks in 1970. In a typi-
cally self-effacing response to this disap-
pointing setback, Conway ordered a license
plate for his car, which read “13 WKS.”
Conway later enjoyed a fruitful part-
nership with fellow comic Don Knotts
in the Apple Dumpling Gang movie
series, he appeared in a number of Dis-
ney films, and he provided the voice for
some 40 characters in animated films,
TV episodes, and video games. He
played Grandad in a Hallmark movie in
2015 and promoted the “Carol Burnett
Show” and other classic TV series as
recently as last year.
C o n w ay ’s c h o i c e o f
title for his autobiogra-
phy, “What’s So Funny?
My Hilarious Life,” was no
idle boast, but represented
a balanced and healthy
self-awareness.
The comedian also is
properly remembered as
the father of seven, and for
his quiet philanthropy.
I found myself react-
ing to news of Tim Con-
way’s death with sincere and heartfelt
grief, startling for its depth. That wave
of grief was in response not only to the
hours of joy, entertainment, and laugh-
ter the comedian had brought me over
the years, for which I remain grateful.
My personal bereavement was to a great
extent a function of the impact Tim Con-
way had on my brother, Bob, who was 10
1/2 years my senior. Bob died last year,
and his first yahrzeit, a sad family mile-
Bob modeled a great deal of his own
humor and personality on the comedy
of Tim Conway. He repeated his jokes
and retold his most memorable routines.
More significantly, he adopted many
of his mannerisms, and to a degree his
physical carriage, his way of speaking,
and his modest, self-deprecating humor.
As a young child, I emulated my cool
older brother, thus embracing elements
of the Conway legacy before even recog-
nizing the source.
News of Tim Conway’s death brought
my personal grief at Bob’s untimely pass-
ing — which I had thought long since
duly processed and emotionally man-
aged — very much back to the surface, in
all its raw and painful immediacy. Other
members of my family, including Bob’s
own sons, reported similar reactions. We
found it impossible to respond to Tim
SEE TIM CONWAY PAGE 37
JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019 31
Dear Rabbi Zahavy

Your talmudic advice column

Dear Rabbi Zahavy, Zionist thinkers who repre- seems to be giving rise to essence of classical Zionism. But that
I visited Israel recently, and from what Isented the major expressions increasingly vocal con- would be an attempt at humor, not an
saw I admired the continued growth of the of Zionist ideology. He repre- servative nationalism. analysis of the current culmination of
sented political Zionism with
country. But at the same time, I felt a deep Has the essence of Zionist life and thought.
apprehension about the manifold internal entries from the pens of The- Political Zionism been I have reflected long and hard about
and external dangers that it faces. I am odor Herzl and Max Nordau. f u l f i l l e d ? T r u e , we my own way to find Zionist meanings
He presented cultural Zion-
worried that Israel has lost its way and is have a democracy that in my numerous visits to Israel and my
ist thought with writings by
no longer serving to fulfill its Zionist mis- functions, but it is also long stays in the country, and in con-
sions. How can I regain my confidence in Ahad Ha-Am (Asher Zvi sadly true that there is suming much of its news and culture
the present vitality and the future pros- Ginsberg) and Hayyim Nah- Rabbi Tzvee still anti-Semitism and and TV and films and books and so
pects of the State of Israel? man Bialik and others. He Zahavy enemy rockets do rain much more. I know my Zionism is strong
Fearful in Fair Lawn included writings by Zionist down on southern Israel. and runs through the fiber of my being
Dear Fearful, Marxist and utopian social- It’s plain to see that the like high-voltage electrical current. But
I too have spent a lot of time in Israel of
ists like Ber Borochov and Nahman Syr- political reality of the modern state it is not right for me to characterize it as
late and I do share your concerns. It’s a kin. He gave examples of religious Zionist is far from the perfected vision of the socialist, political, cultural, or even reli-
complex country of more than nine mil- expressions through the works of Rabbi founding fathers and mothers of mod- gious fulfillment that I see and feel in my
lion inhabitants. It faces many internal Abraham Isaac Kook and Martin Buber ern Israel. relationship to Israel.
conflicting points of view and differing and other voices. He represented activ- Cultural Zionism: The richness of What then can I say about the nature
aspirations. And yes, it is beset by the ist Zionism through the likes of Vladimir Hebrew expression in literature and of my Zionism? Here’s my try at an
external challenges of hostile foes who Jabotinsky and Chaim Weizmann. the arts is beyond debate, and so the answer. I’ve concluded of late that I am
seek to damage or even destroy the state. In each of these categories he chose cultural Zionists rightfully would take an Existentialist Zionist. And I mean that
But my take on the situations it faces voices that expressed clearly the essen- pride in the accomplishments of Israeli in two senses of the term. Here’s how.
is positive and confident, and not sim- tial messages and purposes of the expressions, even in its popular forms For a person who is an existential-
ply by virtue of any of the classical defi-
respective forms of Zionism. And you for trendy music and predictable dra- ist, existence takes precedence over
nitions of Zionism. I have a personal and can see in the history and reality of the matic TV shows. But so much of contem- essence. That’s how I feel when I am in
original take on the matter. modern State of Israel the impacts of porary Israeli culture is clearly grounded Israel. It’s also how my father felt when
Let me explain first a bit about the his-
these influences. in Western popular modes of expression he first went to Israel in 1959. I recall
torical context of past Zionist visions and But which one represents the real and entertainment translated into the how the very fact of being in the country
then tell you how I now formulate my essence of Zionism? language of Israel. was a fulfilment of his Zionism.
own conception of Zionism for the mod- Of course, in its early stages in the As diverse and extensive as it seems The roads he was driving on when he
ern State of Israel. 1950s, Israel by necessity relied on to be, can we say with confidence that was on his way up to Jerusalem for the
The great historians of Zionism tell socialist forms of economic and social today’s cultural expressions are the first time were not just paved thorough-
us about its major forms: political Zion- organization. But by the 1980s, as the essences of what the founders envisioned fares to him. They were the roads of the
ism, socialist Zionism, cultural Zion- pools of capital started forming within for the future state? Has the essence of Jewish State, his roads, the roads of his
ism, and religious Zionism. I respect Israel, the standards of living improved, Cultural Zionism been fulfilled? No doubt ancestors, the roads of all Jews in the
and venerate all the past great Zionist the economy strengthened, and the in language, literature, and the arts mod- world, past, present, and future. He was
thinkers and activists. To some degree necessity of the reliance on socialist ern Israel has a defined and distinct cul- never part of a mundane car ride or bus
the modern state is the successful mechanisms began to fade. Today Israel ture. But in many ways, it has achieved ride or just a walk in a street in the state
expression of the four classical forms is known more for its brash capitalist normalization of indistinct cultural con- of Israel. He was a dramatic actor in the
of Zionism. And to some extent it rep- venture start-ups than for its earlier his- tinuity with the rest of the world. spectacle of Jewish existence.
resents a failed or incomplete imple- tory of collective kibbutzim. Religious Zionism: Last, the religious His first home movies of Israel, which
mentation of each of them. Socialist Zionism: Has the essence of life of Jews in the state of Israel is deep he proudly showed us in 1959 when he
In his great anthology, “The Zionist Socialist Zionism been fulfilled? In med- and flourishing — yet the divide is wide came home from his trip, were a few
Idea,” in 1959, Rabbi Arthur Hertzberg, icine and education Israel is strongly and growing between the large numbers minutes of film of his car rides on the
who lived in Englewood, assembled socialist. But now it is mainly a strikingly of separationist charedim and the secu- roads of the modern state, taken from
excerpts from the illustrious classical successful start-up nation, a capitalist lar Jews, and even other religious Jews. the window, as much as they were of
country with all the problems of such It’s seems the divisions between religious holy sites. And I recall how he brought
Tzvee Zahavy has worked as professor a state. It’s simple to argue that now camps and the secular population are us, his small children, the little paper
of Jewish studies, religious studies, Socialist Zionism cannot be judged as deepening and the chasms are widening. bus receipts that they gave the passen-
advanced Talmud, halacha, Jewish law the true essence of current day Zionism. Can anyone honestly argue that the gers, so proudly pointing out that they
codes, and Jewish liturgy at major U.S. Political Zionism: The political vision- essence of Zionism now is fulfilled in such were printed in Hebrew.
research universities and seminaries. aries founded a representative form of dissonances? Has the essence of Religious We were young and puzzled. Hello
He has published numerous articles government that took shape in the body Zionism been fulfilled? Judaism is prac- daddy, that’s not the present we
and books about Judaism and Jewish of the Knesset and other major institu- ticed freely and proudly as the state reli- expected. What’s in your other hand?
life. He received his Ph.D. from Brown tions. Today critics lament the ineffec- gion, but many elements of the promised And what is so special about driving on
University and his rabbinic ordination tiveness of the Israeli electorate’s pro- redemption of the people of Israel are not a road? But nothing could be more dra-
from Yeshiva University. For details go portional representation system, which now to be realized. Israel is a democracy, matic to him than these mundane items,
to www.tzvee.com. can lead to legislative gridlock and not a theocracy, and the Temple has not for he was a true existentialist Zionist.
been rebuilt and the biblical form of a The existentialist Zionist is not a
The Dear Rabbi Zahavy column offers mindful advice based on talmudic messianic age has not dawned. viewer of somebody else’s show. He is
analysis and wisdom. It aspires to be open and meaningful to all the A satirist might stand up and say a player on the world’s stage in the big-
varieties and denominations of Judaism. You can find it in the Jewish “Hello, the neurotic beginnings of Zion- gest theater. And with just a bit of imag-
Standard, usually but not always on the first Friday of the month. Please ist thought are truly being fulfilled in ination he could believe he is not a bit
mail your questions to the Jewish Standard office or email them directly to the present-day eccentricities and dis- actor or an extra. He too is sure that he
zahavy@gmail.com sonances of the modern state.” And is a star in the show of the ages, the main
that is sort of a strange fulfillment of the SEE DEAR RABBI PAGE 39
32 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019

Bechukotai: A note to self-proclaimed ‘bad Jews’
I
often hear, “I am a bad Jew, rabbi.”
What does this mean?
It usually means, “I’m sorry that
I don’t come to shul more often” or
“Please forgive me that I ate something not
kosher” or “I don’t volunteer for the syna-
gogue as much as I should.”
Essentially, I feel like it is a form of
self-judgment or a declaration of embar-
rassment. Some may call it “Jewish guilt.” Rabbi
In either case, how should I respond to Jennifer
these self-proclaimed “bad Jews”?
Schlosberg
We begin this week’s parasha, Bechuko- Glen Rock
tai, with the following verse: “If you follow Jewish Center,
My laws and faithfully observe My com- Conservative
mandments, I will give your rains in their
season, so that the earth shall yield its pro-
duce and the trees of the field their fruit” (Leviticus 26:3).
I’ve always found this passage difficult to read. Why?
Because it essentially says “do good, and good will come
to you” and then — later in the parasha — “do bad, and
bad will come to you.”
But we all know life does not always work out that way.
We all know people who are faithful to God’s com-
mandments and yet, tragic things happen to them. On
the flip side, we also know people who do not follow the
commandments or we know people who are unethical
and yet, somehow, things just easily fall into their lap.
This challenge of theodicy (“why bad things happen to
good people”) is one of life’s essential questions for which
we really have no answers. But, dare I say, should that
change how we live our lives?
Regarding the verse above, rabbis have long asked why
we need two phrases that essentially say the same thing.
In other words, not only does this verse say, “if you fol-
low my laws,” but it also says “if you faithfully observe
my commandments.” Are both necessary? Isn’t that
redundant?
According to various commentators, both phrases
are needed because one phrase represents Torah study
Lo levad
FROM PAGE 29
This week, music director Amichai Margolis and I led
a service of healing and harmony at the OJC. This gath-
ering for prayer, meditation, and music was planned to
create a safe space for all who attend, a place to think
about their own mental health and those of their loved
ones. The message that life brings struggles and we can
turn toward God for support and strength is the keystone
of this service. And I will wonder about all of those peo-
ple who would benefit from a healing service and could
not be there.
Thank goodness for the month of May, for the pro-
gramming and education and focus on mental illness. But
what about everyone who is not able to be in synagogue
with us? What about the people who struggle with men-
tal illness in their homes or in facilities and cannot leave,
who are trapped there, unable to enter into a commu-
nity of faith? What about those people’s caregivers, too
D’var Torah
and the other represents observing the
mitzvot. Torah study and observing the
mitzvot — according to this verse — com-
bine to bring goodness into this world.
Alternatively, one can look at these two
mitzvot sequentially and argue that Torah
study leads to action.
But I have a different explanation.
The second phrase, “if you faithfully
observe My commandments,” uses the
Hebrew words “mitzvot” (commandments)
and “lishmor” (“to observe”). This outlines
an obligation to follow the command-
ments, such as observing Shabbat, keeping
kosher, or praying. When someone says to
me, “Rabbi, I am a bad Jew,” these are the
ritual commandments they are skipping.
Some would call these mitzvot “ben adam la’Makom,”
commandments that are between an individual and God.
In contrast, the first phrase “if you will follow my
laws” uses the Hebrew root for “la’lachet” or to “go,” or
“walk.” This is the same root that comprises the word
“halacha,” Jewish law, as it teaches us how to walk, live,
eat and breathe in a sacred way in the world around us.
I believe that this phrase represents how we lead our
daily lives outside of the ritual mitzvot: how we treat
the cashier in the grocery store or a waiter in a restau-
rant or how we speak to our family members behind
closed doors. Some would call these mitzvot “ben adam
la’chavero,” commandments that are between an indi-
vidual and other people. But I believe this category also
includes how we make ethical decisions when no one is
watching us or how we take the high-road — even when
it involves a great sacrifice or risk.
Why are both phrases necessary?
Because there are the ritual mitzvot and then there is
everything else.
We can keep Shabbat and study Torah and daven
every single day. We can light holiday candles and keep a
kosher home and observe the laws of modesty, but that
exhausted or fearful of stigma to come out and join us
in community? Where many of us see a sanctuary, they
might see an unbearable barrier to entry.
How can we begin to change this reality for Jewish
people and their families who feel isolated due to mental
illness?
Merle Feld’s poem “Dreaming of Home” reads as a clar-
ion call to all homes of worship to be places where people
are safe and known.
“We want so much to be in that place
where we are respected and cherished,
protected, acknowledged, nurtured, encouraged, heard.
And seen, seen
in all our loveliness,
in all our fragile strength.
And safe, safe in all our trembling
vulnerability. Where we are known
and safe, safe and known —
is it possible?”
is only one part of the Jewish equation. The other part
involves being a “God-fearing,” ethical person, treating
others with respect, doing the right thing, living the “off-
hours” with honor and sanctity.
Some of us could do better at keeping specific rit-
ual mitzvot.
And some of us could build more sanctity into our
daily interactions and whereabouts.
I don’t judge you or think you are a “bad Jew” if you
are not following the ritual commandments. And — I
don’t judge you if you lose your cool with your kids or act
unwisely out of stress or speak out of turn.
I don’t judge you or
think you are a “bad
Jew” if you are not
following the ritual
commandments.
So to those of you who feel like “bad Jews,” please
remember:
Halacha is not limited to ritual matters. Halacha,
Jewish law, is also how we live our lives in the “in-be-
tween.” The Torah teaches us that both forms of holi-
ness combine to bring goodness into the world.
Perhaps when the Torah says our observance of
the commandments will provide us with rich crops
and fruits or produce, what it really means is “live
your life with goodness as if your life depended
on it.” So while our actions might not be able to
reverse the course of a terminal illness or prevent
a natural disaster, we can at least celebrate the var-
ious ways we can live as “good Jews” in our daily
pursuit of holiness.
We can continue to speak out. We can become really
good listeners. We must work hard so that people feel
safe in our sanctuary spaces. If you are struggling with
mental health issues and you feel alone, reach out to your
rabbi or local Jewish Family Service or one of the mental
health agencies in your area.
Reach out in any way that you feel able, so that some-
one who cares can meet you halfway. Even if you can only
reach out a very short distance, I hope that an empathic,
caring person will meet you the rest of the way.
If you are lonely because you are a caregiver to some-
one struggling with mental health issues, I hope you find
a friend, family member, or professional to listen, share,
and allow you to strengthen yourself.
You might feel alone and you might feel lonely. The
goal of Mental Health Awareness Month is to provide a
community of support for those who struggle not just in
the month of May, but in all the months that follow.
I pray for all of us for a refuah shlayma, a complete
healing, a healing of body and healing of spirit.
JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019 33
Calendar
Myrna and Alan Cohen Torah in Englewood
Spring Concert at offers a pre-Shavuot
the Jewish Home at lunch and learn
Rockleigh, 2:30 p.m. with Rabbi Mordy
Refreshments. 10 Link Kuessous, assistant
Drive. (201) 750-4231. rabbi, Ahavath Torah’s
Benaroya Sephardic
Monday  Center and Moriah
School Sephardic
JUNE 3 cultural program
director. Lunch
Golf/tennis/cards in features a Sephardic
Alpine: The Jewish menu. 240 Broad Ave.
Home Foundation Reservations, Eileen,
hosts its 25th annual (201) 568-1315 or
outing, with golf, dorldor@ahavathtorah.
tennis, and cards, at org.
the Montammy Golf
Club, rain or shine. It’s
in honor of Howard
Wednesday 
Chernin. mshulman@ JUNE 5
jewishhomefamily.org.

JUNE The Jewish Federation of Northern New Jersey’s “One

Book One Community” focus on this year’s book
6 selection, “Among the Living,” ends with a program
featuring author Jonathan Rabb at Temple Beth Sholom Rabbi Joshua Rabbi Mordechai
Becher
in Fair Lawn, 7 p.m. Dessert reception and book signing. 40-25 Fair Finkelstein
sLawn Ave. (201) 820-3900 or jfnnj.org/onebook. ASHLEY WALDVOGEL Lunch and learn: Talking about Israel:
Rabbi Joshua In commemoration
Finkelstein explores of the yahrzeit of
services at 6:30. opening ceremony Jewish texts at the Rabbi Isaac L. Swift,
Friday  411 South Little Tor
Road, off Exit 10
Sunday  and walk, 1:30, then a
Friendship Fair with
Montebello Jewish Mordechai Becher
of the Gateways
Center, 11:30 a.m. 34
MAY 31 of the Palisades JUNE 2 inflatables, rides, train, Montebello Road, Organization and
Parkway, New City, games, crafts, food, Montebello, N.Y. Yeshiva University will
Shabbat in N.Y. (845) 708-9181 or and entertainment. (845) 357-2430 or discuss “Moving Mount
Orangeburg: Pride nanuethc.org. 145 College Road. montebellojc.org. Sinai: Revelation,
Month kicks off at the (845) 368-1889. Synagogues, and
Orangetown Jewish Shabbat in Closter: Shukeling” at
Center with Pride Rabbi David S. Tuesday  Congregation Ahavath
Shabbat services, Widzer and Cantor JUNE 4 Torah in Englewood,
7 p.m., and again Elizabeth Goldmann after Mincha at 8 p.m.
Shabbat morning at lead services with It is co-sponsored by
9 a.m. 8 Independence the Unplugged Band the shul with the Rabbi
Ave., Orangeburg, and offer a blessing Isaac L. Swift Chair of
N.Y. (845) 359-5920, for all high school Friendship walk/ Judaic Studies at the
ojcpride@gmail.com, seniors, 7:30 p.m., 221 family fun day Kaplen JCC on the
or theojc.org. Schraalenburgh Road. in Suffern: The Palisades. 240 Broad
(201) 768-5112 or tbenv. Friendship Circle Ave. (201) 568-1315.
Shabbat in New org. of Rockland’s JEWISH HOME FAMILY
City: The Nanuet Friendship 1K walk is
Hebrew Center hosts Concert in Rockleigh:
at the Eugene Levy The David Glukh
a meet-and-mingle Fieldhouse at Rockland Rabbi Mordy Kuessous
open house with Klezmer Ensemble
Community College in presents an afternoon COURTESY AHAVATH TORAH
Tot Shabbat, 5 p.m.; Suffern. Registration
barbecue with music of klezmer, Yiddish,
and tee-shirt pick- and international music Lunch and learn: The
by NHC’s Temple up, 12:30 p.m.; Hoop Dor L’Dor group at
Dudes, 5:30; and for the 17th annual
Wizard show, 1; Congregation Ahavath

34 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019

 Calendar

Thursday  Moon blessing: The

Montebello Jewish In New York Kaplen JCC, Englewood Health
JUNE 6 Center holds a Kiddush team up for wellness program
Levanah, an outdoor
celebration of the new
Tuesday  The Kaplen JCC on the Palisades of Mondays and Thursdays at 6 p.m.
moon, the new month, JUNE 11 Tenafly and Englewood Health have The class will be tailored to the par-
and life, 7:30 p.m. started a new session of the Wellness ticipants’ individual needs.
34 Montebello Road, Museum mile festival: and Longevity Heart Health Program, The time commitment is 60 min-
Montebello, N.Y. The Jewish Museum aimed at people with heart disease or utes twice a week for five weeks,
(845) 357-2430 or participates in the 41st
montebellojc.org. annual “Museum Mile who have risk factors for heart dis- for 10 sessions in total. Participants
Festival,” 6-9 p.m. The ease, including diabetes, high blood will have access to the JCC gym at no
Friday  opening ceremony at
5:45 is at El Museo del
pressure, and a family history. It is additional charge. Fitness staff will be
also for people who are overweight available to help with personal work-
Deborah Lipstadt JUNE 7 Barrio, Fifth Avenue
at 104th Street. or have completed a formal cardiac outs at the JCC, and participants will
Deborah Lipstadt in Shabbat in Closter: Rain or shine. Free rehab program. The structured five- receive a free JCC membership for
Nanuet: The Holocaust Temple Emanu-El museum admissions week program, led by medical and fit- one month.
Museum & Center hosts “Blue Jeans and outdoor art ness experts, aims to lead participants A final wrap-up session will be
for Tolerance and & BBQ”; dinner at activities for children;
into a well-rounded, healthy lifestyle. held on Thursday, July 11, from 6 to
Education in Rockland 6 p.m., services at live music and art-
welcomes Professor 7. 180 Piermont making workshops Physician clearance is required. 7 p.m., at the Graf Center for Integra-
Deborah Lipstadt, who Road. Reservations, on Fifth Avenue at The first group fitness class at the tive Medicine at Englewood Health.
will discuss her book, (201) 750-9997. selected museums. Kaplen JCC on the Palisades will be Baselines will be taken if requested.
“Antisemitism Here and (212) 606-2296 or on Monday, June 3, at 6 p.m., and The cost for the program is
Now,” at DoubleTree Shabbat in Closter: MuseumMileFestival.
by Hilton Hotel. Temple Beth El offers org. doctor clearance forms must be sub- $100. For more information or to
Wine bar, 6:30 p.m.; confirmation services mitted. Classes will be led by certified register, call (201) 608-2377 or go to
lecture, 7; dessert and led by Rabbi David S. trainers at the JCC’s fitness center on EnglewoodHealth.org/HHP.
pictures with Deborah
Lipstadt, 8. Unsigned
Widzer and Cantor
Elizabeth Goldmann, Singles
books will be available with the class of
for sale. 425 East
Route 59, Nanuet.
5779, 7:30 p.m. 221
Schraalenburgh Road.
Sunday 
(845) 574-4099 or (201) 768-5112 or tbenv. JUNE 2
HolocaustStudies.org. org.
Singles meet in Healing after heartache
Caldwell: New Jersey
Saturday  Jewish Singles 45+ The Glen Rock Jewish Center offers a widowers aims to enhance coping as
JUNE 8 meets at Congregation six-session bereavement group with you share experiences with others and
Agudath Israel with
a surprise performer, Jewish Family and Children’s Services gain support and strategies. Checks
Shavuot in Teaneck:
Temple Emeth offers 2:30 p.m. Program from Wednesday, June 5, through July are payable to JFCS. For more infor-
erev Shavuot services includes a sing-along, 10, 2 to 3:30 p.m., at the shul. mation, call (201) 652-6624 or email
and confirmation joke telling, food, The support group for widows and office@grjc.org.
with participation by fun, mingling, and
children who have a dessert buffet. 20
completed their Academy Road. Sue,
requirements, 7:45 p.m. (973) 226-3600,
1666 Windsor Road. ext. 145, or singles@
Rockland golf event aids hospice
COURTESY NHC
(201) 833-1322 or agudath.org.
Israeli Scouts in New emeth.org.
City: The Nanuet
Hebrew Center hosts
Wednesday  United Hospice of Rockland’s 19th Andrew Fisher. There are still a few
a concert by the JUNE 19 annual Golf Classic is Monday, June foursomes left. For information, call
Israel Scouts Caravan, 17, at the Paramount Country Club Joe Cain at (845) 634-4974 or email
Seniors meet: Singles
7 p.m. Refreshments in New City. Participants will have a jcain@hospiceofrockland.org.
available. 411 South 65+ of the JCC
Rockland meets for day of golf, lunch, and dinner. This To register or become a sponsor go
Little Tor Road, off
Exit 10 of the Palisades dinner at Rocco’s year’s event, “Remembering Raselle,” to birdeasepro.com/uhrgolf.
Parkway, New City, Family Restaurant, is presented by Dr. Edward Scott and
N.Y. (845) 708-9181 or 6 p.m. 170 S. Main St.
nanuethc.org. New City, NY. Individual
checks. Reservations,
Gene, (845) 356-5525.

Senior activities are scheduled

Crown Heights Shabbaton at Washington Township shul
The JCC of Northern New Jersey’s
Tzach Lubavitch of Crown Heights, a project of LYO, the Lubavitch Youth Active Adult program that meets at
Organization, has an all-inclusive Shabbaton for singles and couples, today through Temple Beth Or offers seniors ways
Sunday in Brooklyn. Speakers at the “Pegisha” (encounter) with Chabad include to get engaged, learn, and explore.
Rabbi Yisroel Bernath of Rohr Chabad NDG (Notre-Dame-de-Grâce) in Montreal, Dr. Israeli dancing is on June 4, at 11:30
Binyomin Abrams, an award-winning speaker and teacher, and Miriam Yerushalmi, a.m.; A discussion, “Marc Chagall:
a marriage and family counselor. Love, War and Exile,” will be on June
The Shabbaton includes hospitality, food, matchmaking events, and comedy. For 6. On June 13, “Dale Chihuly: Life,
more information, go to shabbaton.org. Glass Works, and Instillation,” is the
topic. Both are at 11 a.m.; and “Judah
P. Benjamin: The Jewish Confeder-
ate,” will be discussed on June 20
and 27 at 11. Programs are funded in
part through the Jewish Federation
of Northern New Jersey. The shul is
at 56 Ridgewood Road. Kosher lunch
is available with reservations. Email
Ruth, RuthB@JCCNNJ.org.

JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019 35

Kosher Crossword
“LET’S GET PHYSICAL”
BY YONI GLATT, KOSHERCROSSWORDS@GMAIL.COM
DIFFICULTY LEVEL: MEDIUM
Across
1. Moses wore one for the last third of
his life
5. Meshuggah
10. Police-alert letters
13. Mahktesh bounce-back
14. Sarai’s husband
15. Sea eggs
16. Sodom’s destruction, to one lis-
tening?
18. “Flags of ___ Fathers”
19. Burns up
20. Sleep-___ (night-time tablet)
21. Bean for Creed on “The Office”
22. Black History Mo.
23. What the Bielski brothers were
known for?
26. Many Monopoly props.
28. Monogram of 1948 Nobel winner
for literature
29. Word with tall or short
30. ___ gedola (separated produce)
32. Show that launched the careers of
Moranis and Ramis
34. Tzitzit speculation?
38. Former soccer org.
39. Like Choni HaMa’agel for 70 years
41. Bad Boko
44. Takes too much, for short
46. Brewer’s device
47. Hoffman’s “Ishtar” or Spielberg’s
“The BFG”, e.g.?
50. “Ching” preceder
51. Particle of dust
52. “And Esau ___ to meet him”
(Genesis 33:4)
53. Spy Hari
55. Unwelcomed Sukkah guest
56. Physics aspect pertaining to the
mishpacha?
59. Formerly known as
60. Force of note
61. “Metamorphoses” writer
62. Fig. in identity theft
63. More like Stallone?
64. Mosby and Striker
36 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019
Down
1. Queens Mr.
2. Pulls off
3. Parve dessert option
4. Laker often referenced by his first
name
5. Move one’s tail, as a dog
6. Superior of Maria in “The Sound of
Music”
7. Most 5-Across
8. Charles Foster and Erica
9. “Heavens!” to a texter
10. Near by
11. Spring upon
12. MP Luciana who resigned from the
Labour Party in protest of Jeremy
Corbin
17. Land of Acre: Abbr.
21. Tom ___ Riddle
22. Like Eglon, in Judges
24. Director Cohen, and others
25. Some bags
27. Levi or Levy, e.g.
31. ___ Boys Choir
33. Grand Canyon, for one
35. The world over
36. Not inert
37. Party founded by Yair Lapid
40. Org. in education
41. Belonging to the husband of
Zeresh
42. Observes Yom Kippur, perhaps
43. Many a movie rating, nowadays
45. Give a little tzedakah
48. Carl ___ aka Absorbing Man (Lee/
Kirby creation)
49. Dietitian’s stat
54. Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov
56. They go from town to town: Abbr.
57. Oozy stuff
58. RBs pick them up
The solution to last week’s puzzle
is on page 39.
The Frazzled Housewife
Someone save me
I
love when a column writes
itself….
Here on Hastings Street we get
very nervous when we see a fire
truck. Almost 11 years ago, we lost our
neighbor to a gas explosion, and the
anxiety has lingered all of this time.
(Well, at least for some
of us, can’t speak for
everyone on the block.).
So the scene I will set for
you is this:
It is early Friday morn-
ing and the world’s best
mom decides to make
some cookies for the wel-
coming of the Sabbath
queen. She preheats the Banji
oven (well, the world’s Ganchrow
best mom does, I have
yet to meet the actual
Sabbath queen) and waits for the beep
beep beep to begin filling the house
with smells of brown sugar and marga-
rine. The world’s best mom heads over
to other parts of the house to clean up
and vacuum (as the world’s best mom
does not have cleaning help…).
All of a sudden, a loud alarm goes off. because if the alarm goes off again, and
“What is that?” she wonders out loud. It
is really wailing, that alarm, and a voice know about it. A few more minutes of
is repeating, “Fire! Fire! Fire!” Umm,
what? She realizes that there is smoke
everywhere. As she runs to the keypad
to turn of the alarm, she is thinking that, to meet all of these nutty women (OK,
perhaps, “The Most Heavenly Broccoli
Kugel,” that she made from her new
cookbook, might have leaked over the
sides, forming a puddle of grease on the
bottom of the stove, causing the stove to
smoke when she preheated it this morn-
ing. Stupid kugel — it better be really,
really heavenly.
She runs upstairs to check on son #3,
who is sleeping. She is thinking that she
better get up there fast so he doesn’t
worry about his precious mother. She
opens the door, about to say, “Mommy
is OK, don’t worry!” but son #3 is fast
asleep. Fast. Asleep. OK, at least the
alarm didn’t wake him up, she thought.
The phone rings and it is the alarm
company. “Everything is OK,” I tell
them as I tell the woman who really
doesn’t care a quick synopsis of my
morning, including the security code.
She informs me that she will call the
fire department to call of the alarm.
Thirty seconds later, I hear the sound
of a fire truck. “Please don’t be for me,
www.thejewishstandard.com
please don’t be for me,” I am thinking
and saying out loud. And it was for me.
I run outside to say, “It was a stupid
housewife mistake. Everything is fine.”
And I proceed to tell the cute firemen
what happened. They informed me
that they still have to come in and
check that everything is
OK. We reminisce about
the unfortunate house
explosion, how this call
was not their first “stu-
pid housewife” call of the
day, checking that all of
the windows were open
and that there was little
smile left.
I told the main guy
how 19 years ago I had
spilled a bottle of baby
oil under the oven and
the guys had moved the oven and
cleaned up the mess for me because I
was holding two crying, but adorable,
babies. Good times.
So my house gets the all-clear. I
receive a lesson in NOT resetting the
alarm until the fire department comes,
it is an actual emergency, they won’t
small talk and he was on his way. God
bless those firemen. They really are
heroes, putting out real fires and having
maybe I am just nutty).
The whole time I am thinking of
son #3, who is upstairs and proba-
bly really freaked out with all of the
smoke and noise and voices, so I run
upstairs to tell him that everything is
OK. Up the stairs I go again, yelling as
I go, “It’s all good, don’t worry, every-
thing is fine.” I open the door and,
yes, he is still fast asleep.
Come on, really???? How deeply
can an 18-year-old sleep? And then I go
from greatest mom in the whole world
to scary mom. “Well, this is all your
fault because you are one who got me
the cookbook in the first place!” And he
continued to sleep. Oh well.
Now I just have to remember to clean
the oven before I turn it on again. Good
luck with that.
Banji Ganchrow of Teaneck is hoping her
Friday night company enjoyed the Most
Heavenly Broccoli Kugel. Stay tuned. It’s
a real nail biter.

Kay Bindell
Kay Bindell, 80, of Wayne died May 24.
She is survived by her husband of 59 years,
Lawrence, daughters, Bonnie and Hilari Gould
(Douglass), and two grandchildren.
Donations can be made to Friends of Wayne
Animals, Wayne. Arrangements were by Louis
Suburban Chapel, Fair Lawn.
Roslyn Gersten
Roslyn Gersten, 86, of Fort Lee and Boca Raton, Fla.,
formerly of Scarsdale, N.Y., died May 23. She founded
RG Domestic Employment Agency.
She is survived by her husband of 65 years, Gerald,
children, Barry (Merryl), Shari Gersten (David
Rosenblatt), and Lisa Gersten (David Gerwin), and
seven grandchildren.
Donations can be sent to the Cholangiocarcinoma
Foundation, American Friends of Magen David
Adom or Jewish War Veterans, Washington, D.C.
Arrangements were by Robert Schoem’s Menorah
Chapel, Paramus.
Michael Rock
Michael Rock, 83, died May 21.
He is survived by his wife of 61 years, Sandy,
children, Linda and Gregg, and three grandsons,
Will, Jake, and Dylan.
Donations can be made to the Greater NJ Chapter
of the Alzheimer’s Association or the Crohn’s and
Colitis Foundations. Arrangements were by Robert
Schoem’s Menorah Chapel, Paramus.
Edgar B. Wolf
Obituaries/Opinion Edgar B. Wolf, 88, a long time resident of Woodcliff
Lake passed away on May 18, 2019.
Beloved husband of Beatrice (née Slapack) who he
was devoted to for 62 years and loving father to Sarah
Andy Wiesenfeld Wolf and her husband Richard Gordon (Media, PA)
Andy Wiesenfeld, 54, of Oradell, formerly of Fair and Dr. Barry Wolf and his wife Dr. Sarah Jacobson
Lawn, died May 22. (Palo Alto, CA). Loving grandfather to Joshua
He graduated from the Wharton School of Gordon, Hannah Wolf, and Abby Wolf.
Business at the University of Pennsylvania and Born and raised in Newark, NJ, Ed was a resident
earned a master’s from Columbia Business School. of Woodcliff Lake for the last 45 years. He was a
He was a Certified Public Accountant and a chemical engineer and project manager and travelled
Certified Fraud Examiner. all around the world for his career living in Australia,
He is survived by his parents, Sandy and Philip the Netherlands, Brazil, Mexico, and Wyoming to name
Wiesenfeld of Fair Lawn, wife Leslie, children, a few. Ed was also a veteran of the Korean Conflict.
Nicole and Josh; a sister, Lori Wiesenfeld; brother- Ed will be remembered for his love of always
in-law Mark Earnshaw, and a niece. seeking knowledge and in his community was an avid
Services were at Temple Avodat Shalom, River bridge player and his happiest times were with his
Edge. Arrangements were by Louis Suburban loving wife, children, and grandchildren.
Chapel, Fair Lawn. — Paid Obituary —
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comic a critical element of the eternal life that so

Tim Conway
FROM PAGE 31
Conway’s death and to reflect upon his career, charac-
ter, and contribution without once again grieving for
our brother, father, and uncle.
Although Tim Conway’s death elicited painful
moments of renewed personal grief, I also have found a
intrigued Rabbi Broka. This cheerful realization miti- Funeral Planning Simplified
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L ’ Shana
measure of comfort and perspective in that disquieting In addition to all the other joyous gifts Tim Conway
and doleful experience. The comedian’s ability to shape brought me in life, he now also has taught me Torah, by

L ’ Shana
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style of countless fans and admirers — Bob Prouser
bringing into vivid relief the substance of Rabbi Broka’s
object lesson in eternity.
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38 JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019


Senior Care
Dear rabbi
FROM PAGE 32
production of eternity.
As I see it, David Ben-Gurion was the epitome of an
existentialist Zionist. He was a completely secular per-
son, an openly avowed atheist. Yet he was a resolute
student of the Tanach — the Hebrew Bible that others
believed was inspired by God. What was that contra-
diction all about?
Ben-Gurion walked around the land of Israel carry-
ing his Tanach because that was the roadmap to his
existential fulfillment. It was his physical script as he
acted out the age-old dramas of Jewish existence in the
modern time and place of his living. It did not matter
to him that he denied the metaphysical. He was expe-
riencing an existential reality, and nothing could be
more potent and meaningful than that.
Home Repairs When I come back to New Jersey after a stay in
Israel, people ask me, how was your trip? I find myself
without hesitation saying something like, “It’s amazing
how much new infrastructure and building is going on
there in Israel.”
Shouldn’t I be saying that I was bowled over by the
religious uplift of my prayers, or by the depths of the
cultural experiences, or by the myriad of political
accomplishments, or by the fabric of complexity of the
society? Well of course, yes, I am witness to all of that
and judge it all significant, even amazing.
But my answer inevitably is, “How marvelous are
the highways in Israel.” That’s the overt symptom of
my core existentialist Zionism. The bedrock of exis-
tence takes precedence for me over any of my pos-
Entertainment sible reactions to the many profound essences that the
State of Israel represents.
And lest we forget, I said there was a second aspect
of existentialism that characterizes my Zionism. Yes,
it is the angst. The same angst that you, dear reader,
seem to feel.
Jewish Music with an Edge
Ari Greene · 201-837-6158
AGreene@BaRockorchestra.com
www.BaRockOrchestra.com
“ Being hungry affects
your appearance,
how you act. When I’m
Solution to last week’s puzzle. This week’s puzzle is
“
hungry, I’m not in the
on page 36. mood for anything.
Classified/Dear Rabbi
Existentialists in general are said to be racked by
angst — anguish, torment, anxiety, worry, fear — about
the fragility and turbulence of existence. Oh yes, I
have all of that while in Israel — while on the stage as
a member of the dramatic cast. I am frightened and
tormented. And I bring that all back with me too.
Enemies outside, internal strife, corruption, racism,
cynicism, hubris. I can go on and on about my exis-
tential Zionist angst. And yes, it is there, and there is
nothing more to say about it.
So, to answer your question, Zionism is alive and
vibrant. It is strong and can flow through your body
and soul — if you let it — if you let yourself be an exis-
tentialist Zionist.
That’s all you need know. That’s all you need to do
— just be it.
In the anthem “Hatikvah” we sing of our hope in
one short simple critical verse, “To be a free people
in our own land…”
To be — to exist — that for certain has been ful-
filled and is renewed every day in modern Israel with
greater vitality.
I see it when I look out at the streets, highways,
stores, buildings, parks, museums, schools, yeshivas,
universities, synagogues, malls, theaters, beaches,
hills, fields, buses, taxis, tanks, trucks, children going
to school, Jews, Arabs, Christians, tourists, natives, old
and young.
The manifold existence of these real assets takes
utter precedence over any imagined and unfulfilled
essences from the conceits of the past.
And what about your worries? Existentialists call their
worries angst. Anyone who looks hard and seriously at
existence is overwhelmed eventually by the doubt in its
permanence. It is normal — but should not be norma-
tive. Angst is a feeling — it can be noticed — but then it
must be dismissed as a passing concern of a miraculous
vibrant life force generated in the State of Israel.
Inspired by Jewish values and ideals,
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JEWISH STANDARD MAY 31, 2019 39
 JS-40*

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family room, master bedroom suite, C/A/C and more! Priced Dear Barb: Installing a second staircase to the sec-
now at $449K. Terrific Value! ond floor is becoming more common in new construc-
WENDY WINEBURGH DESSANTI tion and when remodeling older homes. It will con-
Broker/Sales Associate sume quite a bit of floor space, particularly on the first
Top Office Producer 2016-2018
floor, so make sure the resulting room sizes will still be
Circle of Excellence-Silver 2018
Best Of Trulia & Zillow Top Agent functional.
201 310-2255 (pref)/201 569-7888 It is possible to build the staircase from scratch or higher or lower than the rest of them, someone will
Wendydess@aol.com there are staircase and handrail kits available. Which surely stumble. Also, if the staircase is not adequately
2018 Realtor of the Year (EBCBOR) option you select will depend upon your carpentry solid, there will always be a squeaky step or two.
skills, your financial budget, and your time constraints. You should be able to order preassembled stair-
Building any project from scratch is most satisfying, case kits at your home center. If you cannot find
but installing a preassembled staircase kit is the option any, contact the following companies: AJ Stairways,
OPEN HOUSES most homeowners select. Duvinage, Mylen Stairs, and Stepstone.
SUNDAY, JUNE 2 • 1–3PM Installing a staircase is a unique project in that the
workmanship must be nearly perfect. The height and
These companies will make the staircase kit
to your height and width specifications, with the
õTEANECKö
size of each stair must be identical. If one is just slightly height being most critical. They have to know the
exact vertical distance between the first-floor and
second-floor surfaces in order to determine how
high each step must be. They will select the number

BANK-OWNED PROPERTIES
of stairs to determine the most common stair height
to which you will quickly become accustomed.
High-Return Investment Opportunities It is best to wait until you have the final flooring
on both floors so you are certain of the finished ver-
See all available properties at tical measurement. If you want to install the stair-
njhomeinfo.com case earlier in the project, perhaps for access to
subsequent second-floor projects, precisely deter-
GARDEN STATE HOMES mine the thickness of the finished flooring and add
25 Broadway, Elmwood Park, NJ this to the height measurement.
In an older house, the walls and floors may have
Martin H. Basner, Realtor Associate
settled and are likely no longer true. In order to
201 Sherman Ave. $599,900 (Office) 201-794-7050 · (Cell) 201-819-2623
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971 Wilson Ave. $599,900
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When the preassembled staircase is delivered,
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151 E. Fort Lee Rd./Faces Crestview $375,000
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Mint Cond B/L. 5/6 BRs, 4 Gorgeous Full Baths. 73’ X 150’ Prop. LR/DR open to Grnt screwed in place.
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ALL CLOSE TO NY BUS / HOUSES OF WORSHIP /
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201-970-4118 Cell features by other Creators Syndicate writers and
201-585-8080 Office
cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at
(201) 837-8800 Realtorallan@yahoo.com
www.creators.com.
40 Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019

Real Estate & Business
HOUSE CALLS
Banks keep the appraisals
EDITH LANK
Dear Edith: When we applied for a
mortgage, the bank charged us for an
appraisal. They said it was so they’d
know how much it was safe to lend us.
As the new owners of the house, we
would like to see that appraisal. They
say we can’t. But we paid for it. Do we
have the right to see it?  - L.R.
Answer: When you apply for a loan, you
pay for an appraisal and also for a credit
check on yourself. Both of those are for
the lending institution’s use. I expect you
agreed somewhere that even though you
paid for the documents, they belonged
to your lender. In the same fashion, bor-
rowers often pay for a bank’s attorney,
who represents the bank’s best interest
rather than the borrowers’.
Most institutions feel that releas-
ing appraisal and credit documents
to interested parties — buyers, sell-
ers, borrowers — is just asking for
trouble. Someone is sure to object to
something. Nevertheless, one banker
tells me that “if the buyer kicked and
screamed and made enough fuss, we’d
probably break down and send him a
copy of the appraisal.”
So maybe you should try just asking.
‘As is’ can be trouble
Dear Edith: We bought a house a year
ago. The owner died, and her son came
from another state to take care of the
funeral, etc. Wanting to get back home
fast, he offered us the house, and we
bought it. We have been paying the
bills, taxes, and remodeling costs and
living there.
Now, we’ve received a notice that last
year’s taxes were never paid. We sent a
letter to him but got no response. The
city says we owe taxes and penalties.
What do we do now? I now regret
that we did not go through a lawyer for
the closing. It was a cash deal, “as is.”
 - R.W.
Answer: If it turned out the furnace
didn’t work, you couldn’t expect the
previous owner to pay for the repair.
You bought the place “as is.” That
means you promised to take the real
estate along with any problems it had.
Those unpaid taxes, whether you
knew about them or not, were one of
the problems.
You’re lucky if that’s the only prob-
lem you bought. Without a legal search
of title, how do you know for sure that
the son really owned the place and had
JS-41
Money for what matters.
the right to sell it? Your ownership is
only as good as his was. That’s some-
thing else that should have been legally
checked out before you handed over
the money.
You can take the problem to a lawyer
now, but I think you’d better pay those
taxes promptly to protect your own
interests.
To pool or not to pool
Dear Edith: Is a semi-in-the-ground
pool an asset in selling our house, or
should we get rid of it first? We are
thinking of selling within the next year,
and we are 60 years of age.  - P.V.
Answer: That largely depends on your
location. Among other things, what are
your summers like? What shape is the
pool in? How many bedrooms does
your house have? What’s the neigh-
borhood price range? How large is the
yard? Those are just a few of the factors
to be considered.
You need advice from an agent famil-
iar with sales in the area. Look for lawn
signs within a few blocks and call the
companies handling the house sales.
Most brokers are happy to discuss such
matters at no obligation to you.
Buying a smaller home
Dear Edith: If a person is ready to sell
Don’t settle for your mortgage. Get the terms you
a large paid-for home and purchase a deserve from Visions. With the No Closing Cost
smaller home at the same time, how
is it done? I anticipate going through a Mortgage from Visions, you get a low interest
real estate office.
How is the money handled in the
rate – and no closing costs* means you save
selling and the buying? Do they both thousands right from the start. Learn more and
happen at the same time? It seems as
if the money would be in limbo tempo- apply now at visionsfcu.org/noclosingcosts
rarily. Does a bank hold it meanwhile,
or the real estate agent? Should the
smaller home be ready for purchase
prior to selling the larger home?
To me, this is a somewhat tricky situ-
ation.  - I.B.
Answer: Relax. Real estate brokers and
lawyers arrange transactions like yours
all the time, and they’ll know how to
write the contracts and set things up so
visionsfcu.org
that everything dovetails. That’s what
you hire them for.
By the way, if you sell the larger *Credit union membership required with a $25 minimum deposit – certain restrictions apply. Check with a Visions Federal Credit Union
representative for membership eligibility details. Promotion valid on the 10/1 Adjustable Rate Mortgage (ARM) product only. Applications
home first, the money isn’t in limbo; it are subject to standard credit criteria. New purchase or refinance. One- to four-family, owner-occupied, primary residence only. Maximum
belongs to you, though sometimes, you mortgage dollar amount funded is based on region and property value. Estimated savings of closing costs, which varies by geographic market
and property, would be at least $3,370, including, but not limited to, the following costs: appraisal, flood determination, application fee,
may let your closing agent hold it. credit report, lender attorney fees, recording fee, title insurance, and mortgage tax. Borrowers are responsible for initial escrow setup, interim
interest, owner’s title insurance, tax service fee, borrower’s attorney fees, survey, and private mortgage insurance, if applicable. Property
Creators.com
insurance is required. Flood insurance may be required. This promotion is subject to change without notice (including the rate). Other
restrictions apply. Rates are variable and can increase by up to 2% annually beginning in the 11th year, up to a lifetime rate adjustment of 5%.
Rate increases are based on the index at the adjustment time plus the margin. Please speak with a representative for current rate information
Contact Edith Lank at www.askedith. or visit visionsfcu.org/mortgage-rates. Cannot be combined with any other promotion or offer. Submit applications by Dec. 31, 2019.
com, at edithlank@aol.com or at 240
Hemingway Drive, Rochester NY 14620.
Jewish Standard MAY 31, 2019 41
 JS-42*

Real Estate & Business

Honor the gift of the Torah with honorable wines

GABRIEL GELLER
Shavuot is not an eight-day long holiday
like Sukkot or Passover, yet it is no less
important. Indeed, as we celebrate the
gift of the Torah, we also have special hol-
iday meals which means special wines are
in order. While the custom in many com-
munities is to eat a dairy meal, whether it
is followed by a meat one or not, let’s for
once this coming Shavuot not exclusively
focus on white or rosé wines.
The wines from Bordeaux in France
have a special aura which is looked up
to by winemakers all over the world. For
now close to a thousand years, the wines
from Bordeaux have been representing
the best of the best in terms of quality,
knowledge, tradition, and craftsmanship.
Thank God, some of the best wines from
Bordeaux have been regularly produced
in a kosher version for the past 30 years
or so, and the selection grows almost on a
yearly basis. Despite the obvious global cli-
mate changes that we have been noticing
in recent years, the weather in Bordeaux is
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still not as predictable and consistent as it
is in California or in Israel. Bordeaux how-
ever has been blessed with good to great
conditions from 2014 through 2018, each
of these vintages having produced excel-
lent wines.
Top-shelf red Bordeaux wines are typi-
cally aged for 12 to 24 months in oak bar-
rels, followed by at least one more year
at the winery once bottled. Therefore
the current vintage on the market now
is 2016. For those of you who are really
familiar with these wines, you certainly
have noticed the Château Giscours 2016
from Margaux. It is arguably their best
wine so far, and considering the previous
vintages that’s quite the statement. There
is also the second kosher release of Châ-
teau Lascombes which is truly impressive.
And then there is Château Montviel, amaz-
ing wine from Pomerol, aka the kingdom
of Merlot. The novelty this year is Château
du Tertre, a fifth Growth Margaux. It is a
supremely elegant wine, already showing
its promise and which should age wonder-
fully for many years to come.
Wesley
Hills
The aforementioned Bordeaux
wines will grace the yom tov table as
the perfect wines to best celebrate the
gift of the Torah. The weather has also
warmed up quite a bit, and therefore
here are some excellent white and rosé
wines to pair with your appetizers,
dairy meals, fish and perhaps even
more important, to refresh yourselves.
Take for instance the Elvi Vina
Encina Rosado 2018. Made from Tem-
pranillo grapes, this Spanish Rosé has
a beautiful intense pink color, as well
as a great aromas and flavors of straw-
berries, raspberries and watermelon.
It would accompany some light snacks
such as olives and pickles, but also a
goat cheese salad with cranberries and
sun dried tomatoes.
Pacifica Winery in Washington State
makes an impressive off-dry Riesling
2017, it is simply gorgeous, very much
affordable under $20, and a crowd
pleaser, liked by sophisticated and
casual drinkers alike. I love Riesling
because of its versatility with food.
With its great acidity, mineral/earthy
notes, subtle sweetness, as well as with
its apple and Meyer lemon aromas, it
can be sublime with a full-flavored
cheese such as an aged, pecorino as
much as it can cut through the savory
flavors of a veal risotto.
The Tabor Adama Sauvignon Blanc
2018 is yet another success for this
excellent producer in the Galilee.
While its compatibility with roasted
chicken is undeniable, it would shine
best when paired with soft cheeses
and fresh sourdough bread. Light to
medium-bodied, with notes of ripe
lemon, kiwi and freshly cut grass. It
is downright delicious and amazingly
refreshing also on its own.
The Domaine Bailly Pouilly Fumé
2018 is also a Sauvignon Blanc but its
aromatic profile is very different than
the Tabor. The style of the wines from
Loire Valley’s Pouilly Fumé appellation
in France are more floral and mineral
than the fruit-forward character of Sau-
vignon Blanc from Israel or California.
Medium-bodied with complex notes of
lime, spring flowers, grapefruit, and
flint with a core acidity that should
allow this wine to age for a few years.
Last but not least, dessert. The Her-
zog Late Harvest Orange Muscat 2018
is simply perfect to sip alongside a
piece of cheesecake. It is light and del-
icately sweet with aromas of ripe apri-
cot, orange blossom, and quince jam
with excellent acidity which is just per-
fect to cut through the creaminess of
the cake. The thought of this combina-
tion alone is mouth-watering.
Chag Sameach! L’chaim!
ROYAL WINE

Jimmy J
J
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