5/29/2019 Report - Google Docs

Gaskin - 1

Mia Gaskin

Professor Batty

English 101

29 May 2019

Persuasive Essay Reflection

Looking back on the original essay, I remember having so many ideas and solutions that I

wasn’t able to decide which ones to use so I used them all. One thing I struggle with is second

guessing myself and I think it shows in my original essay. Professor Batty even mentioned I had 3

seperate things going on in one paragraph. My main concern for this revision was to narrow down

the point I was trying to make so that “more elaboration” wasn’t necessary for the reader to fully

understand my essay. I wanted to share my personal experience joining a school club to show that

my essay was credible and that the reader was hopefully able to relate to my experience in some

way. I read my original essay out loud a couple times and decided to focus on the ideas that stood

out to me most so I decided to omit some things like the tutoring solution and unnecessary quotes. I

didn’t want my essay to be compiled with “filler” quotes and sentences. Overall, I wanted my

essay to flow and not bounce around from idea to quote to solution, etc. If I’m being honest, I

thought I knew how the formatting should be, but I was doing it wrong by forcing paragraphs

together and having too vague of a thesis without addressing all the parts to it. Another issue with

my original essay is that I didn’t have enough sources. Once I tightened up my thesis and narrowed

down the points I wanted to address, it was easier for me to look for additional sources to

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5/29/2019 Report - Google Docs

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incorporate into my essay. To wrap it up, I read my revised essay 2 times to look for any

grammatical errors and/or sentences that threw off the organic flow of my essay.

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