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The Reality of Lies

It started with a "It's nothing much." then into "I'm handling it." and it just becomes "I'm okay.". It
is just difficult for us to tell the truth especially when the problem involve ourselves. The reason may be
because we don't want to worry others, we don't want to be judged or we just don't want the drama that
naturally comes with saying the truth. In any case, lying became one of our defensive mechanisms when
we are pushed or just uncomfortable with the situation. It might also be because you have ill intentions
or you just lie for no reason at all. Some do it more natural than others but no lie can last forever, it will
be revealed either you do it yourself or others will do it for you.

No one notices the cracks and gaps or at least that is what you want to think. You want to think that
you're doing this to not cause them any trouble or worry them. "They have their own share of problems
themselves and I should not bother them much more." is what you keep telling yourself, that dealing this
problem on your own is most efficient.

It might also be because they might judge you and misunderstand your intentions. This might
happen when you are talking about something that for example you don’t like but a friend keeps doing it.
Or when you want to point out something that just don’t go in line with your beliefs but your friends think
so otherwise. Those who have the same views coincide while others who don’t are tossed aside. We are
living in that kind of society after all.

The reason may also be as simple as "I don't want people to stick their nose to my business." which
is not necessarily bad. We have a thing called privacy. You don't want to deal with any complicated matters
with people knowing what's on your plate. In all honesty, human relations are complicated. Years worth
of friendship can just vanished because of one heated argument. A decade of marriage can be messed up
because of a misunderstanding and a lifetime worth of trust can come crashing down with just one wrong
decision. As such, you can’t just point your fingers to someone who does not want to share what they are
going through.

It could also be because you want to harm someone by giving them false information which is not
morally right but some do it nonetheless. This type of lies are the ones we should be very wary of since
we can never know what runs in that person’s head when telling us such information. It could just be for
a silly prank or for something much more sinister than you could ever think of.

We could lie to just about anything, like when our parents ask how’s school going and you just
answer them that it is going well without problems or when your sibling asks who ate the last slice of cake
in the fridge and you say it is not you even though it is totally you. Or when your boy/girlfriend ask why
are you not responding to messages and you answer them that it is because you got an errand to do but
in reality you are just playing video games. Or when you are in a group work and your co-member ask
you why you did not do your part and you tell them that it is because your computer broke but the truth
is you just fell asleep eight after watching your favorite drama

Lying may be convenient but we, humans, have emotions and sense of rationality that we can't just
completely shut off and that's where consequences of not telling the truth come into play.
There is a dreadful feeling whenever you tell a lie especially if it is with a family or a close peer.
Your conscience is telling you to just say it but your pride do not allow you to. Sometimes, you can find
yourself wishing that all your lies can just become the truth but you realize that it will not happen and you
fell even deeper in despair.

As you continue to lie, you can't help but think "Are they really not noticing anything? Or it might
because they just don't care." once your thought go into this direction, you feel even more hopeless. You
somehow want them to notice but you don't want to open up yourself to them. It causes you so much
confusion that you feel like you're losing your head.

Well, we have to admit: lying is easier than telling the truth. We can just bottle thing to ourselves
and pretend it did not exist but the world we live in is not that simple. We have to understand that we are
connected to others, family, friends and acquaintances. As such, our pain is their pain and our happiness
will be their happiness as well. Getting used to suffering and pain does not mean we don't feel every
second of agony as we go through them.

darwin.ambalong@gmail.com

Darwin D. Ambalong

Philippines

18 years old