ROVELO, JORINE B.

11-PERIDOT

CRITIQUE PAPER

Staying up all night, sleeping all day can swiftly impact over 100 proteins in the blood

This article used a lot of shortcuts incorrectly and some of the statement used wordiness too. There is a lot of citation and
it is incomplete. Changing some words to statement will do to make this article mush better and checking the article once
again to make sure that it doesn’t have error.

The author used a lot of word “it’s” and is not appropriate in an informal text, they used “it’s” instead of “ It is” and it
must be formal when we make article because in formal text contractions is not allowed when you’re writing a formal
text.

In my article there are lots of unfamiliar words or not ordinary words that I haven’t heard or read before. Just like the
word “Detrimental” ( Detrimental means harmful or damage ) Many people don’t know that word so therefore when they
read the article they don’t understand it. So that means the author should make the word easier to read or understand.

The word “PNAS OR PNAS USA” is a peer-reviewed multidisciplinary scientific journal, Therefore they should type it
in a full name not acronym. And the meaning of PNAS USA is ( Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the
United States of America)

Informal English includes conversational language, Contractions such as “can't, won't, and I'm”. Contractions are not used
in formal English. Formal English is carefully worded as in academic or professional writing. Therefore, “can’t, won’t
and I’m” it should be “ Cannot, will not or I am.” to make it understand

The word “Their” too much used or excessive used. It can change it into other pronoun by using the rule of pronouns such
as I, you, he, she, it, and they those are example of Subject pronouns. me, you, him, her, and it. Those are examples of
Object pronouns. my, mine, your, yours, his, her, hers, and its. Those are examples of Possessive pronouns. who, whom,
whose, what, and which are example of Interrogative pronouns. another, each, everything, nobody, either, and someone
are examples of Indefinite pronouns. who, whom, whose, that, and which are examples of relative pronouns (it is a like an
interrogative pronouns).myself, yourself, himself, herself, and itself are examples of Reflexive and Intensive pronouns.
Lastly, this, that are examples of Demonstrative pronouns.

The word “ Don’t ” it should be changed into “Do not”.

The word “ Misalignment ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, and therefore you can
change it into “ incorrect arrangement ” to make it more understandable.

The word “ Desynchronosis ” is an example of highfalutin. Therefore you can change it into “ Jet lag ” to make it more
understandable.

The word “ we’ve ” is not appropriate in an informal text. Therefore it should be “ we have ” to make it formal. Because
in formal text contractions are not allowed in writing formal text.

The word “ It’s ” is not appropriate in an informal text. Therefore it should be “ It is ” to make it formal. Because in
formal text contractions are not allowed in writing formal text.

The word “ It’s ” is not appropriate in an informal text. Therefore it should be “ It is ” to make it formal. Because in
formal text contractions are not allowed in writing formal text.( it was repeated).
the name of a place. “ CU “ Therefore it should be in full name first before the acronym. it is “University of colorado”.

The word “ altered sleep ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into
“sound sleep or catnap” to make it more understandable.

The word “ transitioned ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into
“change or move” to make it more understandable.

The word “ postdoctoral ” is an example of a wordiness word because it has a choice of word, therefore change it into
“academic ,advanced or grant in aid” to make it more understandable.

The word “ I’m ” is not appropriate in an informal text. Therefore it should be “I am” to make it formal. Because in
formal text contractions are not allowed in writing formal text.

The word “ fibroblast ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into “
formative cell or embryonic cell ” to make it more understandable.

The word “circadian” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into “ Every
day, during the day, constantly, day to day” to make it more understandable.

“ They ” is an example of redundancy. Therefore change it into “ He or She” using the pronoun.

The word “ Expenditure ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into
“costs, money, payments, expenses or spending” to make it more understandable.

The word “ medicine ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into
“healing art, cure, treatment or drug” to make it more understandable.

The word “ simulated ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into “
Fake, pretend, imitated or replicate/ duplicate” to make it more understandable.

The word “ Plague ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into “torture
or trouble” to make it more understandable.

The word “ decreased ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into “
lessen” to make it more understandable.

The word “ workforce ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefore change it into “ staff
or personnel” to make it more understandable.

“ 20s ” should be spelled it out. Therefore it should be “ 20’s ”.

The word “ researcher ” is an example of a highfalutin word because it has a deep meaning, therefor change it into
“monitor, observer, investigator and field worker.” to make it more understandable.