Running head: Myself as a Communicator – Part 2 1

Myself as a Communicator – Part 2

Justin Weber
Salt Lake Community College
Running head: Myself as a Communicator – Part 2 2

I interviewed two close friends, one of whom is also a coworker, and my girlfriend in order to
gain an outside perspective on my communication abilities. For the most part, we all tended to
agree on how I communicated and there were very little differences in how I perceived myself
compared to how they perceived me. This mostly reinforced what I already knew and suspected
about myself, so it gives me validation on the areas I know I need to work on.

Articulating needs, opinions, views or concerns

I found that my close friends tend to think I’m very good at communicating my needs, opinions,
views or concerns, but my girlfriend feels that I could use some improvement in this area. My
friends felt that when I approached them and discussed topics with them, it came easily, and
conversation flows really well. My girlfriend felt that it seemed difficult for me to communicate
complicated ideas at times, but other times it could be easy for me, especially when they were
topics I was passionate about. In talking with her, we felt that maybe it can be difficult for me to
articulate well is because we commonly talk about complex and more intimate feelings than I
would with my friends.

This aligns closely with my own evaluation except I did not consider discussing intimate and
personal topics when taking the evaluation. My friends did agree that I tend to articulate and
express myself with ease when I am around them and don’t tend to need to reexplain myself. My
girlfriend also noticed that is true of me when we are with friends, which aligns with my
evaluation. This mostly affirms my thoughts and evaluation and I will work on how I articulate
with more complex ideas by pausing before I speak to better form my thoughts.

Listening
Both friends and my girlfriend felt that I was a good listener with them. I always seem to be
paying attention and following the conversation. Because I am a good listener I contribute to the
conversation with relevant responses and keep the conversation going. One friend did note that I
occasionally will look at my phone during conversation pauses, but he felt equally guilty of
doing that.

Their input aligned well with my evaluation, except my friend noting that I look at my phone. I
wasn’t factoring that into my evaluation before, either because I wasn’t aware that I did that
often enough or because I didn’t want to admit that I was doing that behavior. This is a bit
different than my evaluation and I will have to work on eliminating that situational distraction.

Nonverbal communication
Everyone felt that my nonverbal communication was good. They all felt that I made good eye
contact and my body language is appropriate for our conversations. They all noted that I use
hand gestures, but they are not large and distracting. My girlfriend stated that I do use physical
contact at times when I speak with her, but friends stated that I never do with them.

This also aligns with my evaluation well. I thought my friends would have thought that I used
some physical contact with them while speaking with them, but they felt that I never did. Quality
eye contact also aligned with my evaluation. I will continue to work on some of my nonverbal
skills such as lessening my hand gestures to make sure they are not too distracting and try to use
more physical touches.
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Communication strengths
Both friends and girlfriend felt my strengths were listening and good eye contact. My friends
though I was good at articulating, where my girlfriend felt that I was better at physical touch
during conversations. I agree that these are communication strengths I have, but they are not the
ones that stood out most in my own evaluation.

This is very different from my evaluation where I said my strengths were adaptability and self-
awareness. I think that difference is due to my fault of not explaining to them those as
communication abilities. Apparently, that is part of my communication abilities I need to work
on.

Communication weaknesses
One friend said a weakness I have is replying too quickly, and sometimes interrupting the end of
another’s sentence. The other friend said my communication weakness was my hand gestures.
My girlfriend reinforced what she said earlier, which was my inability to articulate complex
ideas well.

In my evaluation I said my weakness was empathy and cognitive complexity. While I did ask
everyone at different times if I felt empathic in conversations, they all felt that I was, but it didn’t
stand out to any was specifically a weakness or strength. However, my girlfriend was more
responsive to that line of questioning and said she wouldn’t be dating me if I wasn’t empathetic.
It is still an area I need to work on so that others see it as a strength.

Having a conversation with me

All said they enjoy having conversations with me, which is a large part of why they socialize
with me. They say my conversations are fun and we can carry on easily and for as long as either
party is willing. No one could state if there was any specific communication ability that really
stood out for better or worse.

This is closely aligned with my evaluation. I stated that most conversations with me are
lighthearted and pleasant. Even if topics become more serious, I am aware of the tone change,
the dialogue is civil, and I adapt to the new topics. I can easily carry on conversations for hours
at a time. This is accomplished by listening well, being self-aware of my words and actions, and
adapting to the conversation.

Overall, my friends and girlfriend unknowingly agreed closely with my own evaluation. I have
many strong communication traits like listening, nonverbal communication, adaptability and
self-awareness. Those strengths have room for improvement, and I will continue to work on
those skills. While not poor, I do have communication weakness like empathy and cognitive
complexity. While doing these interviews, I did find that I also had some minor situational
distractions that I need to practice on not paying attention to.

I feel that this assignment reinforced a lot of what I already knew about myself, such as my
listening abilities. I also opened me up to new areas I wasn’t aware of that I need to practice, like
empathy and articulating complex ideas.
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