Divorce

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Divorce or dissolution of marriage is the final termination of a marital union before the death of either
spouse. When you file a petition to terminate your marriage it means canceling the legal duties and
responsibilities of marriage and dissolving the bonds of matrimony between you and your partner. In
simple terms, divorce takes place after a couple decides not to live together anymore as husband and
wife. They sign legal papers that allow them to live single again. After divorce, it becomes legal to plan for
re-marriage for both husband and wife. The remedies, a husband and wife, can avail of in this country is
for nullity of the marriage, a petition for annulment or a petition for legal separation. During the Spanish
occupation, the lawmakers chose to delete the provision regarding divorce as they wanted to preserve
the sanctity of the marriage and the respect due to it. Divorce has never been an option and that has
continued up to now. Marriage is a sacred bond, forged by our Christian faith and recognized in our laws
so it is regarded the highest respect as it speaks of a lifetime commitment. Marriage is a foundation for a
family so the concept of divorce is continued to be frowned upon. Our supreme law, the 1987 Philippine
Constitution, provides that it is the policy of our State “to protect and strengthen the family as the basic
autonomous social institution and marriage as the foundation of the family” (Section 12 of Article II and
Sections 1 and 2 of Article XV). “Our family law is based on the policy that marriage is not a mere contract,
but a social institution in which the state is vitally interested. The State can find no stronger anchor than
on good, solid and happy families. The break up of families weakens our social and moral fabric and,
hence, their preservation is not the concern alone of the family members. Thus, our Constitution devotes
an entire Article on the Family, recognizing it “as the foundation of the nation”. It decrees marriage as
legally “inviolable,” thereby protecting it from dissolution at the whim of the parties. Both the family and
marriage are to be “protected" by the state.” (Asqueta vs. Republic, G.R. No. 180668, May 26, 2009)

Every marriage vow include the words, “for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer” which means that
a marriage will never be perfect, it will always have conflicts and misunderstandings and those are the
very words the couple vowed before God and each other, that they will be on each other’s side whatever
and whenever life will bring them. It takes two to tango, to make a relationship work, the couple would
have to work through their differences and quirks. Ultimately, this is to create a healthy environment for
the kids.

Children born out of the marriage are those who are highly affected if such divorce bill is enacted. Several
studies show that the impact of divorce is often associated with feelings of disappointment, fear,
resentment, and doubt (Hartman, Magalhães, & Mandich, 2011; Darlington, 2001). For children and
adolescents, these emotions are often amplified and influence many different aspects of development,
making these emotions determine how the children go on to feel, think, and act as adults. Broadly, the
futures of children that come from a divorced home are contingent upon conflict level, quality of
parenting, and basic needs that are met (Shulman, Zlotnik, Shachar-shapira, Connolly, & Bohr, 2012). The
long-term effects of divorce on children’s lives are seen in competence level in romantic relationships and
psychological distress as they transition into adulthood. Divorce can affect the way of thinking of children
especially when they are already of age to engage into romantic relationships. Children will most likely
follow whatever they see or witness in their own homes and apply them in their lives and families in the
future. It is found that the effects of divorce on a child last well into adulthood, sometimes expanding
across the entire lifespan (Shulman et al., 2012). In particular, social and intimate relational aspects are
impacted the most in adulthood. Adolescents and children that experienced divorce in their childhood
tend to postpone deeply committed relationships and marriage, finding it difficult to achieve commitment
in relationships (Shulman et al., 2012). The damage that could be done on the parent-child relationship
could be irreparable and irreversible. The stress of divorce damages the parent-child relationship for as
many as 40 percent of divorced mothers. The support they receive from home is rated much lower by
children of divorced parents than by children from intact homes, and these negative ratings become more
pronounced by the time children are in high school and college. Children from divorced families receive
less emotional support from their fathers than children from intact families. Divorced fathers are less
nurturing, and more likely to drift away from younger children if denied legal custody at the time of the
divorce. Studies show that most children from disrupted families experience behavioral problems such as
angst and rebellion and are more likely to suffer mental health problems. Moreover, more and more
adolescents engage in pre-marital sex and see sex as an alternative for romantic commitment. Children
of divorcees have this overwhelming fear of rejection and so they tend to avoid intimacy at all costs.
Custody would also be a problem. A non-complying parent would mean taking the matter of custody to
the courts and this would only lead to unnecessary and additional burden and strain on the child.

Divorce means absence of litigation. If divorce is implemented, it would pervert our laws and our sense of
morality. Divorce means mere signing of papers. The courts are then precluded to determine or check the
credibility of the couple’s causes. A petition for annulment prohibits collusion and connivance between
the spouses whereas in divorce, there is no provision as to this prohibition which means that couples can
avail of this remedy whenever they want. This ruins the high respect due to the sanctity of marriage,
marriage becomes merely a trial and error thing, which it never should be.

According to the CBCP, Once divorce is tolerated, no restraint is powerful enough to keep public morality
within the bounds marked out or anticipated. Great indeed, is the force of example, and even greater still
the might of passion. When are we going to learn from the experience of those countries where divorce
is permitted by civil law? For as soon as divorce has become possible, quarrels, jealousies and judicial
separations increase. Wherever divorce was introduced, the abuse that followed far exceeded anything
the lawmakers foresaw. In fact, many people contrive all kinds of fraudulent devices, such as false
accusations of cruelty, violence and adultery, merely to obtain the dissolution of a matrimonial bond of
which they have grown weary. As a result of all this such moral havoc followed that an amendment of the
law has been regarded as urgently needed. It is against our religion, the very tenets of this law. Quarrels
and conflicts are part of every relationship, it could be worked out but when worst comes to worst, the
couple may avail of the remedies that are granted by our Constitution.